Chapter Eighteen
Ahsoka Tano had thought training with her lightsabers to be fun when she was a young initiate. She enjoyed the 'woosh' sound of the blade, and the slicing with ease of the holographic targets, and she really, really liked deflecting the stinging bolts from the training droids. Yet it all changed when her master upped the number of lightsabers to two, and ensured that she could not use her hands to wield them.
"Concentrate," her Master said after the hundredth time she had let both blades fall down before even going through the most basic of forms. "You need to empty your mind and concentrate on what you are doing."
"Pardon me, master, if I do not possess your natural predisposition in the Force," Ahsoka drawled out. "Maybe if I had my hands-"
"The hand gesture is a weakness, padawan," her Master replied. "To use the Force, no gestures are required. Count Dooku needs but his three fingers of his main hand to throw you away from him," he added, showing his hand's index, middle and ring finger. "Three fingers and bam, you're thrown off-balance. Recover it or you die with the next strike."
Ahsoka took a deep breath, and sat down, legs crossed. The lightsaber slowly began to float up in the air, and its partner soon joined the first. She lit them both, and then carefully began to imagine the basic movements of the Shii-Cho form. It wasn't hard imagining them. It was hard turning imagination into practice. One of the lightsaber twitched and jerked, spinning loosely out of control as Ahsoka tried to correct a mistake in the second one.
"Why can't I start with one?" Ahsoka asked, frustration clearly biting her from within. Her Master merely looked at her with a dreadful sigh, and shook his head.
"You learned how to fight with one lightsaber. I will not allow you to think they are the same things. You will learn from scratch, and in so doing, avoid the fallacies that would befall you through the easy way."
"The fallacies?" Ahsoka growled. "I can't even go through one proper motion of the most basic of training!"
"Ah, I see," her Master acquiesced. "And how is that a problem, precisely?"
"How is that-how is it not?" Ahsoka retorted.
Her Master took a few steps away from her, then spun swiftly as a blade of plasma ignited and stopped an inch away from Ahsoka's eye. The Togruta gasped in fear, her mind haywire, and one of the training lightsabers swiftly made a broad swing in front of her to parry the attack. Her Master's blade didn't move from its short distance from Ahsoka's eye, even as the padawan took a step back.
"The most basic of forms," her Master acquiesced as he waved a hand and recovered the training lightsaber he had thrown at her, "Is that of the stab."
Ahsoka's right eyebrow twitched. "Master-"
"See, the second most basic form," her Master continued, "Is that of the swing," he was amused by this. She knew he was amused by this, and she had no choice but to suffer through it. "And the third, and most final move, is that of the crush."
Ahsoka groaned as she looked up at the ceiling of the training room. "I am pretty sure there are more moves than those, Master."
"Maybe," her master acknowledged, "But in my style, there are only those three."
He opened his arms as three training lightsaber lit up, and began to float around him. "First comes the circling," he said calmly, "Then the spinning," the lightsabers began to spin around him, both horizontally, and vertically with the blade, "Then comes the attacking. Stab," quick as lightning, a lightsaber pierced forward, "Swing," another spun in mid-air as it departed from her master's side, "And finally, Crush." With that said, all three lightsaber swung at the same time.
"Basic moves, nothing more to it. Terrifyingly effective too, because somehow, people expect their enemy to actually wield the lightsaber. Don't try this with Dooku though. You're not fast enough."
"Then maybe I should train with a style that can make me fast enough," Ahsoka replied. "He was Master Yoda's padawan too, wasn't he? Haven't you at least been taught the same basics?"
"No," her Master replied. "I preferred not to," he shook his head. "A lightsaber is a tool that must be treated with respect. Lit only when you must take a life, never before. The Force allows you to protect yourself from many threats, and that is why I swore I would never lit a lightsaber for anything less than the taking of a life."
He awkwardly looked at her. "Lifting with the force a block of concrete and using it as an impromptu hammer notwithstanding, of course."
Ahsoka gasped as she tiredly tried, and failed, to lift the lightsabers once more. "I'm too tired, Master. I can't keep this up."
Her Master looked at her for a moment, and then nodded. "Very well," he turned to look at the door, "You can come in at any time," he added, "The training rooms are free for everyone to use."
Knight Thel-Tanis awkwardly stumbled through the door, but swiftly resettled her balance. "What a coincidence!" she exclaimed with a bubbly grin. "I thought I heard the sound of a Padawan whimpering, and I find my favorite Padawan being trained by her master!"
Master Shade's eyebrows both rose. "Since when is she your favorite padawan?"
"Since the day she warned me of the intruder in the library," Knight Darra said. "I was thinking," she added, "Since she's clearly not suited for your combat style, what if I trained her?"
Master Shade opened his mouth to refuse, Ahsoka could feel he was going to refuse the offer, but then he stopped and gave her a single side-way glance. She wouldn't mind learning under Knight Darra how to use a lightsaber effectively -and maybe she'd even be able to face off Dooku if she trained hard enough. Her Master smiled warmly, and nodded once. "Fine," he said. "She's all yours for training."
In the blink of an eye, Ahsoka had broken out of her fake-sling, and stood up with a bubbling grin. "Yes!" she burst out.
Knight Darra looked at her other sling, and remarked, "Aren't you going to remove the other one too?"
"She has a broken arm," her Master said before she could, "Something about not clearing the area fast enough when a droid factory came down on her."
Knight Darra winced at the thought, but still smiled. "Well, that's perfect then! I'll teach you how to use your other hand!"
Somehow, Knight Darra's enthusiasm was not contagious enough to affect her Master, but Ahsoka didn't pay attention to it, grinning as she was from the thought of getting some real training in. Her Master sighed and shrugged slightly, "I'll be meditating in my chambers then," he said. "Keep her in one piece, Knight Thel-Tanis."
With that warning out of the way, Master Shade walked out in quiet contemplation. Knight Darra looked at his retreating back once more, and sighed too, shaking her head with a slightly sad expression. The expression melted away quickly however, and if Ahsoka hadn't been looking up at the knight, she would have probably missed it completely.
Knight Darra smiled broadly, "Very well then, let's get you a short training lightsaber for your left hand. We'll start with some light training, and go from there."
Ahsoka nodded, and dutifully obeyed. As the training began, she couldn't help but think back about her Master's words. Many of the lightsaber forms were, in the end, nothing more than fancy swings and stabs, but there was art and grace to them. Surely, those counted for something too. She wondered if the Dark Side of him she had faced on Felucia through the Force Trance was actually how her master fought with lightsabers. If he outright held more than one at the same time, and-
"You're distracted, Padawan," Knight Darra said suddenly. "What's on your mind?"
"I apologize, knight Thel-Tanis," Ahsoka replied ashamed, "I was just...thinking about Master Shade," she added.
"Oh?" Knight Darra said, before making a small smile. Ahsoka's eyes widened as she realized even before the knight could speak it out loud that there was going to be a misunderstanding about this. She realized, and her face turned white as a sheet as the knight said with the most duty-filled tone possible, "You are at that age, padawan, but you must understand that a simple crush on your master is-"
"Not in that way!" Ahsoka blurted out, her face utterly turned from white to red in a second. "I meant his fighting style!" she continued at Knight Darra's surprised expression. "What is it like? Have you ever seen it?"
Knight Darra blinked, and her mouth formed a simple circle as the words sunk in. She nodded the next moment, and crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Yes, once," the Knight admitted in a hushed tone. "It was on Korriban."
Knight Darra shuddered. "Korriban's the burial place of many Sith Lords," she said. "The Dark Energies there...they permeate the very rocks. Your Master, he was the one least affected, probably the reason we kept our cool more often than not. We still bickered, and he still hit all of us, but at the very least, his presence gave us piece of mind."
Ahsoka nodded. "What about his fighting style?"
"I'm getting to it, padawan," Knight Darra said with a slight reproachful tone, making Ahsoka wince at the rebuke. "When we faced Granta Omega, he wasn't alone. He was with a deranged scientist known as Jenna Zan Arbor. Your Master, he can predict the future, or at least, a good probability of it," Knight Darra hesitated, "We...the Jedi Code says that the many are more worthy than the few. So, to kill one in order to save many is perfectly viable. Your Master-he sometimes makes the hard call for everyone else."
"Sometimes?" Ahsoka asked.
"He goes for the kill, nothing less will suffice," Knight Darra whispered. "Depending on-well, depending on the vision he has, his kill is particularly brutal. He does it with a calm heart, like...like a child dissecting an insect," she added with a light shudder. "That's the most terrifying thing. Listen well, Padawan. If-If you hear him say 'Now is the time you die', look away. Look away and don't open your eyes until it's over with."
Knight Darra took a deep breath to center herself. "It's been years, but I can still hear them scream. And want to know the worst thing?" her eyes half-closed, "He was perfectly justified." She shook her head, "The things some people do, or will do. The scientist, she was unarmed, but she would have escaped from prison, and killed an entire colony of living, breathing people with a deadly toxin. Her death spared them. I can't fault the code with that logic."
"A Jedi should not put himself above...others," Ahsoka replied, and Knight Darra smiled bitterly. "We shouldn't be the ones to judge others."
"Maybe not," Knight Darra replies, "But when I said the same thing, when Master Obi-Wan told him that, when Ferus told him that, he replied with the same sentence. 'Tell that to glass-eyed corpse of the child suffocated in his crib. Tell it to the pregnant mother clutching her stomach in her last throes of life. Tell that to the thousand corpses gasping for air that I have seen. Tell it to them, and then tell me their reply.' We couldn't fault him afterwards."
Ahsoka looked down at the ground, "I thought seeing the future could help make things better."
"It does," Darra grinned, "Just...not for the one doing the viewing."
She proceeded then to pat her head, making Ahsoka wince. "Montrals!" Ahsoka blurted out, dodging the patting, "I use them for echolocation! What is it with patting them?!"
"Oh," Darra's eyes widened. "Night used to pat our heads whenever we looked downcast. It became sort of a habit for him to pat on Anakin's head before he went full Tsundere."
Ahsoka's eyes widened. "He-Wait. He did what?"
Darra nodded. "He was our age, but when he gave you a head pat, you quieted down and you took it. I swear Anakin couldn't stop glowering whenever someone got ahead of him in the head pat count."
Ahsoka spluttered. That...that was insane!
And so many things suddenly made sense to her. Like, so many things that she felt as if she was just a split-second away from discovering the truth of existence. Her Master spread insanity wherever he went and with whoever he talked. He was like, an insanity nexus hidden behind a facade of perfect responsibility. She was on to him.
"If I remember correctly, you would do pretty much the same," a male voice -not that of her master- said offhandedly, as a male Jedi with brown hair, but golden streaks, entered the training room. "You always were too passionate in your youth."
Ahsoka looked at the new arrival with a puzzled expression, and the man nodded to the Padawan, especially at her unspoken question. "I am Knight Ferus Olin, young one."
"You're not that old to use 'young one', Ferus." Darra pointed out with a cheeky grin.
"She is younger than me, Knight Thel-Tanis," Olin stressed out, holding his smile tight. "So she is a young one."
Knight Darra coughed with a hand in front of her face, looking sideways with a twinkle in her eye. Ahsoka just looked, waiting for the other pin to drop. It was only after a few minutes of awkward silence went by that she realized she hadn't yet presented herself.
"Ops," Ahsoka blurted out, "I'm Ahsoka Tano," she said. "Padawan learner of Master Shade."
Ferus nodded. "I heard he had taken on an apprentice." He looked at her with a critical gaze, as if finding faults in her. "How did you convince him?"
Ahsoka shook her head, "There wasn't any convincing. Master Yoda told me he had showed interest, and I accepted after talking with him." Before knowing he was as mad as the Mad Hatter, of course. Then again, if she had known how mad he was, she probably would have accepted all the same because he had been the first to recognize her worth, if he had specifically wanted her as his padawan.
"Interesting," Ferus acquiesced. "After the events of Geonosis, I would have thought he'd steer clear of everyone. He must have seen something," the Jedi Knight said, "concerning your future."
Ahsoka blinked. She had...she had never thought about that. Maybe that explained why her Master had wanted her. He had seen the future -or at least, a probable one- and had decided that training her would prevent some form of catastrophe. What if-What if in the future, she turned out to be a Sith Master who killed countless millions, and thus him training her was the only way to prevent it? Or what if he failed in that, and then they were forced to battle each other on a plain of magma and fire while that damn orchestra music sang out and then he'd say something like 'Ahsoka, I trusted you!' and she then tried to jump, but he had the high ground, and so it ended up with her being cut in half and then burned by the magma of the planet?
That...that was quite the terrific imagery that shot through Ahsoka's head, making her tremble ever-so slightly because, whenever such a thing happened, it was due to her Bond with her master. So, if it was actually due to the bond with her Master...then maybe Knight Olin wasn't wrong. She gasped at the sudden insight, and rushed away.
She needed to get confirmation from her master -he wouldn't lie to her, would he?
Ahsoka rushed through the Jedi Temple, coming to a halt not in front of the meditation chambers -where her master had told her he'd be- but in front of a classroom of young initiates -where she felt her master to be. She recomposed herself long enough to appear 'not in a hurry' and 'not like someone who has to ask if she becomes a genocidal Sith in the future' and then stepped inside.
Her Master was humming contently, a book in his hand, as the rest of the young hopeful Jedi sat in front of him. "It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out of your door," he used to say. "You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to. Do you realize that this is the very path that goes through Mirkwood, and that if you let it, it might take you to the Lonely Mountain or even further and to worse places?"
Her master would have kept on reading, but her intrusion made him stop and turn off the Datapad in his hand. The young learners looked up at her, and she fidgeted for just a bit.
"Yes, padawan?" her Master asked, an eyebrow raised. "Is something the matter?"
"Well," Ahsoka said, "I had a question."
"Is it urgent in the sense of 'I need an answer or someone will die soon', or is it urgent in the sense 'I might feel uneasy unless it's answered quickly'?"
"T-The latter one, master," Ahsoka acquiesced.
"Sit, let me finish the chapter, and then I'll answer you," Master Shade said, gesturing for her to take a sit on one of the empty pillows. She did it with a hint of nostalgia -she used to fall inside the pillows when she was smaller- and now she realized she barely fit in one of those. Her Master continued the story, of this Frodo, and Sam, and Pippin going on an adventure. It was kind of boring, truth be told, but every now and then her ears twitched as she realized the young students were keenly listening on to it. She wondered what lesson her Master was doing -he hadn't told her he was a teacher at the temple, all things considered. Heck, she would have expected him to be a teacher in the art of the Force, not a...was it literature? Was he teaching them how to read in Basic? But they didn't have datapads with a copy of the story in hand, and her Master was simply narrating the story.
It felt like story-time.
It made her sleepy. When Mister Fluffles purred in her lap, and she bent down to scratch the back of his head, she blinked only once, and then shrugged it off. She felt at peace. Maybe, she felt at peace because her Master felt at peace, or maybe it was because the story-telling reminded her of her mother's stories before bed. The soft voice, the small warm smiles...her mother smiled so warmly...
She refused to believe she had fallen asleep hearing her master tell a story. She refused to believe it, yet when she woke up, she was on her Master's back and they were walking -well, he was walking and carrying her- through a thankfully deserted hallway of the Jedi Temple.
"Tell me I didn't fall asleep," Ahsoka groaned as she began to fidget trying to get off her Master's back, and her Master dutifully complied helping her descend.
"You did not fall asleep," her Master replied. "You fell into a deeply meditative state known as 'The Snore', from which you woke up only now."
Ahsoka shot him a glare. Her Master returned a grin.
She shot him a harder glare. Her Master simply grinned even fiercer.
"You're strange," Ahsoka said in the end, and her Master simply shrugged it off. "You're a very strange Master, you know that?"
"So I've been told," her Master replied. "So, what was the question?"
'Do I become an homicidal Sith Master in the future?' was at the forefront of her mind, but before she could even speak it out, her Master neared his right hand to her forehead and 'flicked' it.
"That is the most stupid question ever. You wouldn't cut it as a Sith Janitor, let alone a Sith Master," he chuckled and just like that, her worries disappeared. "That's why I picked you," her Master added softly. "Even in the worst of things I saw, you were still doing the right thing, no matter the cost."
"So...you saw me in the future?" Ahsoka asked.
"Unfortunately, it's just a probability, padawan. Your future's yours to write. Hopefully, you'll write a great one." He winked. "I'll just coauthor you for a bit."
Ahsoka nodded.
"By the way," her Master remarked. "There will be a bit of a lull for a few weeks. Feel free to train with Knight Thel-Tanis, or just head off on missions with other Jedi Masters, I told the High Council you'd be on your own for a while, since I'll be busy-"
"Heading somewhere dangerous again?" Ahsoka hazarded with a raised eyebrow.
"All places are dangerous, do you know the amount of people that die in kitchens?" her Master quipped back with an amused expression. "Still, it will do you good to learn how other masters do things. Whatever happens though," he looked her straight in the eye. "If you end up facing Grievous, Count Dooku, Asaji or any Sith Master...run, call for backup, but do not face them alone."
Ahsoka rolled her eyes. "Yes master, I'll tell them not to try to kill me because my master said so."
"You'd be surprised," her Master replied. "They wouldn't kill you." He sighed. "They'd capture you to get back at me, and then, of course, I'd come right up to save you and there would be this epic fight as I topple mountains and tear apart buildings, and you'd go, 'Stupid master, it was clearly a trap' and I'd say something like 'Silly Padawan, a true Master is trap-immune'."
Ahsoka groaned, and brought her left hand to massage her forehead, before it slowly slid to pinch the bridge of her nose.
Mister Fluffles meowed in the back of her head. At least her cat-like madness-induced hallucination wasn't making troubles.
For the moment.