So uh, how do I explain my relationship with "Dark Grasper"?
Uh, internet buddies?
Quite honestly I didn't expect things to turn out this way. I kind of thought she
would just show up and be ominous, but then she just wouldn't stop messaging me.
At all. I think she PM'd me so much a mod came by and warned her about spam. I'm not sure what food had to do with anything but she baited me into joining this "chat program" she had, which leads me to the current state of my life.
Mindlessly watching her practice speed-running a video game.
"You know," I mumbled into the mic, "I feel like I could be doing something better with my time."
A female voice laughed over the microphone. "Hah! That's where you're wrong Tail Red! I'll have you know that what you're seeing is the fastest time this game has ever been completed! You are witnessing history itself!"
If I thought that Grasper was bombastic in text that didn't even compare to how she acted in reality. Oddly enough though, judging by her voice she seemed to be at least a year or two younger than me.
"I don't really play video games." I admitted, "I'm more a fan of television."
"What decade are you living in?" The girl on the other end of the call shot back, "Television is basically dead unless you're one of those weirdos who like to watch documentaries."
"Oi! I'll have you know there's plenty to watch on TV!"
"Yeah, plenty of garbage shows," she laughed. "Unless you're talking about anime. Those guys in Japan don't care what they air."
"Eh, well…" I guess that was true but, "the way you say it makes it sound like a bad thing."
"Hehehehe…" A shiver went down my spine in response to that creepy giggle.
"Tell me, Tail Red, have you heard of the Children of Nightmare?"
"Children of Nightmare?" I repeated before it hit me. "Oh! You mean those creatures made of fear?"
"Ye-"
"Aren't they just a myth though?"
"Are you an actual idiot?!" Grasper yelled into the mic, "I know you mentioned that you didn't know much about magical girl stuff, but this is supposed to be basic knowledge!"
"Well, you know, I wasn't really interested so…"
She sighed. "Okay, okay. Yes, the Children of Nightmare are the creatures made by fear. Well, the lesser nightmares that is. The Greater ones are weird. Anyways, you do know that the horror genre is basically dead right?"
Okay, I got this. Time to not look like an idiot again! "That's the kind of stories meant to scare you right?"
"..." There was an awkward pause before Grasper spoke up again. "I'm just going to ignore that…"
Nailed it!
"But yeah, with the revelation that our fears create literal Nightmares, the horror genre basically died for the mainstream." She snorted, "You're pretty shunned out of the public eye if you're a horror writer, and the only movies they make left are Rock Horror."
I opened my mouth to ask what she meant but before I could get the words out she had already started talking again, "And before you ask, Rock Horror is basically a derogatory term referring to most modern horror flicks. Since at best they can only scrape up the budget of a small indie film, some people started to say that horror had reached 'rock bottom' and the name just kind of stuck."
"You… Really know a lot about this subject," I mumbled in a bit of awe.
"Of course." I can practically feel her pushing up her glasses. "As an idol, I have analyzed you humans pop culture extensively all in order to fulfill my master plan."
My ears twitched at the dangerous words. "M-Master plan?!"
"Heheheh, do you want to know?" Grasper teased over the line. "My goal… is to be the most popular idol ever!"
I blinked. "What."
"Hmph! It's simple, for you see!" oh god, "I have tailored the personality of Anko Isuna and calculated my content to appeal to as many people as possible without losing that personal connection most mainstream media have! I have manipulated the algorithms in such a way that my videos are beginning to spread like wildfire and the bots can't touch them! All for one goal: so that when they think of cute, the first thing they think of is me!"
I froze. "That's…"
"And when they think of me what's the first thing that comes to mind?! Glasses! I will make it so that all my fans will have the appeal of glasses on their mind 24/7! I will spread the glasses affinity to the ends of the earth, with Anko-Chan as the face of the revolution!"
"That's… so insidious!" I slammed my hands against the desk before grabbing my microphone. "You're manipulating people into loving glasses without even giving them a choice!"
"But there is a choice!" the bespectacled girl laughed, "For it is a love they fell into of their own volition!"
"A contract made under duress is not legally binding in court!"
"What does that have to do with anything?!" Grasper huffed, "Besides, what are you going to do about it? I stand on the path to the King of Idols! My fans won't even listen to one common boy! The only way to stop me is to become an idol yourself!"
I gritted my teeth.
[] Become an Internet idol (This won't backfire, totes)
-[] Male
-[] Female
[] Keep your dignity
Okay, so after talking to a net idol and being forced to make terrible life choices, I decided to go and visit the mad scientist who lives in my basement.
...Okay so that sounds just as bad but I swear it's actually a good thing!
Maybe.
Probably.
I'm just going to stop thinking about this and focus on beating up robots. I had a duel with a Guildy coming up and I'm going to have to jam in as much training as I can in order to win.
"Alright Hong," Twirl's voice said over the speakers, "Since you seem to have gotten the hang of your magical girl abilities I guess it's time for you to go against more advanced Bots."
"So, it's time for level two huh?" I clenched my fist before transforming. "TAIL ON! I AM MAGICAL GIRL TAIL RED!"
The light died down before I summoned the Blazer Blade into my hands. I took a few practice swings before a thought struck me. "Hey do I have to say 'I am magical girl Tail Red' every time?"
"I thought that'd be the part you'd liked the most?" the scientist admitted, "After all, it's not like you to skimp out on the henshin phrases."
"Yeah but it just kind of feels a little… bland. Can I change it?" The possibilities ran through my mind, "Oh! Maybe something like 'To the protect those twintails, I am Tail Red!' or something else along those lines."
"Ehh… Even for me that's kind of…"
"Don't you get it Twirl?!" I shouted, "A transformation phrase has to be blood pumping! It has to get your soul fired up! The louder you yell, the stronger you get!"
"That's a myth Hong." She sighed, "And no, you can't change your transformation phrase. I won't get into the details since it's bo-ring~"
"Alright I get it." With my dreams shattered, I sighed. "Alright, bring on the Twirl-Bots."
"Oh hahaha, this is gonna be fun…" There was a sound of a button being pressed before a now familiar red light colored the room and a noise that sounded distinctly of metal scraping on metal began to seep into the room. "Alright Hong, let me give you the rundown while they're on their way here. The babies coming at you aren't just your ordinary self-defense models! Oh no, these are lean, mean fighting machines! Agile! Deadly! Are you ready?!"
The wall in front of me opened up to reveal a passageway as four black blurs jumped out of it one by one until standing in front of me were…
"Give it up for the TWIRL-BOT ATTACKER UNIT VERSION METAL WOLF!" the white haired girl shouted as I heard the sound of a growl coming from the metallic wolves that were now beginning to surround me. A satisfied sigh came over the intercom, "Of course, these aren't the actual Metal Wolves. These ones have been modified so that they won't hurt you too badly. Or at least, not enough to leave permanent scarring."
"Twirl," I began, "Why."
"Eh, most of the units here are designed to uh, fight creations that sometimes go rouge? Wait! It's not as bad as you think!" Twirl shouted, "L-Look! So Sometimes there's a fault in their program that makes them start attacking anything biological! Bugs are bound to happen okay?! Programming these things is hard you know! I don't have some sort of fancy AI to help me write up the code okay!? It's all one hundred percent human willpower!"
In complete and utter silence I turned from the wolves growling at me to the camera then back to the wolves. I sighed, "Just make sure you don't accidentally create the terminator or something."
"You've never even seen those movies!"
"Well, anyways!" A grin crossed my faces as I raised the Blazer Blade against the wolves, "Let's go-"
"AWHOOOOOOO!!!!"
"Wait no- WHY ARE THEY SO FAST!?"
You know what's good for the mind and soul after fighting against robots? Relaxation.
Shame that the rest of reality didn't agree with me, and I still had school the next day. The best I could do was just hang out with Lan during lunch as we drank something we bought from the overly expensive vending machines.
Can I petition to make those cheaper? No, Mrs. Huang would probably shut that down by using embarrassing pictures of younger me as blackmail. Curse the upper class and the iron grip they keep on this world. I don't get that much of an allowance you know!
Well whatever, all I could do was complain on a school bench.
"So it turns out those wolves were like, twice as tough as the Twirl Bots I've been facing so far." I sighed, "And they also had thermal sensing too because why not."
"Eh, they're actually pretty easy if you know the trick to it," Lan said with a shrug, "I usually just wait until they try to bite me before punching my hand into their mouth and ripping them open from the inside out. Of course, Twirl has usually managed to piss me off by then so it's mostly on instinct."
"I'm pretty sure most people don't just casually rip apart robots on instinct." With a toss of my hand I threw a bottle I got from a vending machine towards the trash can.
It missed the can completely and hit a nearby pidgeon, who proceeded to turn towards me and glare as if promising to enact terrible vengeance upon me one day.
"Uh….." With an awkward laugh I walked up to the bottle and put it in the trash. "Guess my accuracy still sucks."
"I honestly doubt you would've gotten that if you were closer anyways."
"Hey, I'm not that bad!"
"You really are. Watch this." Downing the can in a single gulp, Lan stood up before tossing it into the air. With a loud "Hyah!" and a flick of her twintails, she proceeded to punch the can, sending it flying into a wide arc before it landed into the trash with a soft clang. "See? It's pretty simple."
"How is that simple?!"
"It just takes a little training is all." My childhood friend waved as she placed unrealistic expectations on all athletes everywhere. "But anyways, how was it? Three point shot right?"
"Eh, I don't think you're allowed to punch the ball in basketball." I sighed, "Sorry but foul."
"We aren't actually playing basketball dumbass!"
"Than what are we doing?"
"We're-" She paused, her mouth open as some sort of gears started to turn into her head. "I.... Are there rules for trash can tossing?"
"Wait give me a sec I got this." Alright Google don't fail me now… "Uh, no official rules but it looks like anything goes as long as you get it into the trash."
"Huh, the more you know." She walked over to where I was standing before putting her head over my shoulder and glancing at the website I was looking at. "Though I guess this doesn't count as an actual sport…"
"Yeah… Hm." With a certain sixth sense of my intuition going off, I glanced over at Lan. "Hey are you trying out new conditioner?"
"Wah-" The blue haired girl's head whipped towards me and our eyes met, a look of complete shock on her face for some reason. "How the hell did you know?!"
"Eh? Why wouldn't I be able to tell?" I tilted my head. "Of course I'd be able to tell, I'm always looking at your twintails after all."
"Y-You…" She looked away for some reason, "How the hell can you say that with a straight face?!"
"Let's see…" With one hand, I reached out for her twintail and felt her hair upon my fingers. "Like I thought, it's smoother and softer than usual."
"Don't just grab a girl's hair so suddenly!" Lan shouted, taking her hair out of my hand while still not meeting my eyes. "B-But… really?"
"Oh yeah." I nodded, "It's almost like fine silk. It feels so good I sort of wish I could touch it forever."
"I-I see. Sort of huh?" With an exaggerated flip she turned around and began walking away. "I uh, just remembered one of the sports clubs called me out to help! I'll see you after school in the dojo okay?!"
"Ah, yeah! See you then!" I waved.
She looked a little red for some reason. I wonder what that was about.
"Alright Hong, today's lesson is very important so you better listen!" Lan exclaimed while I was forced to sit on the dojo floor. I'm not sure why but the mood was a little awkward today. "Today I'm gonna teach you one thing and one thing only: How to fight!"
I blinked. Very slowly. "Uh, I think I already know how to. At least as Tail Red. It came with the uh, magical girl instincts I think."
Stunts in my magical girl form just felt way more natural to the point where wielding the Blazer Blade felt like moving a third arm. In my actual body though, fighting just felt like I was waving around my arms like an idiot.
Trust me, I have two years of "sparring" under my belt. I can tell the difference.
"You already know how to wield a sword yes but you don't know how to fight!" My blue haired friend put her hands to her hips. "There's a huge difference between the two!"
"Uh…. Okay?"
"You don't get it at all do you?" she sighed, "The answer is mentality. Sure, you got the instincts to fight, but you don't think like a fighter. At the moment you're just relying on your body's automatic movement to carry you through and it's holding you back. Of course, most magical girls learn this mindset over the course of their career, but we don't have the time for that so I'm going to be beating it into you."
"Right, now explain what you mean by mindset," I said, trying to wrap my head around what she was saying.
With a sigh Lan walked over to the Dojo wall before throwing a wooden stick in front of me. "Here, pick it up. It's easier to show you what I mean."
"Alright then…" Hesitating, I grabbed the stick before rising to my feet.
I think this is the first time I've held anything swordlike since I became a magical girl. How did I wield the Blazer Blade again? I vaguely remember it was like… this? No that felt wrong. Than how about-
"Stop trying to remember your instincts. Trust me, it's not going to come to you." With a flick of her wrist Lan revealed a wooden stick of her own. "Besides, it'll be easier to show you what I mean without them getting in the way. Now, come at me!"
"...You're gonna kick my ass aren't you."
"That is the plan yes."
This is going to hurt…
With a cry I charged forward and crudely swung the stick at Lan, who swiftly dodged out of the way. As if she was made out of air, Lan weaved between each of my strikes with little effort.
"This is more than sheer ability gap! You aren't focusing!" The girl exclaimed, "Analyze your opponent! Predict their next move and study how they fight! Gather as much info as you can until you can see their shadow! Right now you're little more than a brawler!"
Lan swung the weapon in her hand and with a loud smack my arm was sent flying backwards. Before I had any time to pull it in front of me, she put her free onto my chest and pushed me down onto the ground. The stick in her hands slammed into the floor as she loomed over me. "After that, you counter attack. Find your opponent's weak points and exploit them. If you're on the defense, think of a way out. Use whatever abilities you have to the fullest. If you don't use your brain, than you deserve to have lost."
"I… Think I get it?" I huffed, pushing myself up off the floor. "I'm not entirely sure."
"Well, it's not like it's something you'll instantly get. Honestly you probably won't understand it fully until you have it. Just being aware of it is setting you on the right path though, the rest comes down to experience." Lan sighed. "Right, now that I've maybe illustrated my point, it's time to transform and put some of this into practice."
I blinked as something hit me, "Wait, are you still going to be using that wooden stick?"
"Yeeees?" She said, looking at me strangely, "Why?"
"I dunno just, isn't that a wooden stick? Against the Blazer Blade? Which is made out of metal?"
"It's made out of magic."
"It's still metal- Look I'm no geologist but I'm pretty sure I'll cut that stick in half."
"Geolo- No wait, don't bring out your phone to google the proper term." Lan held up a hand. "You're not going to have the chance to cut it, but if you're that worried you can just keep using the stick."
I looked at her. "That sounds like a challenge."
She smirked at me. "You want to bet on it?"
Some part of me flared. "You're on."
"Eh, let's see…" The blue haired girl put a hand to her chin while tapping the stick against the floor. "You're going to the mall tomorrow, right? If I win, buy me something as a gift."
"And if I win you'll, uh-" Shit you've come this far, think brain, think! "Try on these new ribbons I have instead of your usual ones."
She paused before slowly meeting my eyes. "Hong?"
"Yes?"
"Why do you have ribbons?"
I don't.
"Oh you know uh, reasons."
"Right."
Note to self: Buy ribbons. Maybe.
"I'm just going to ignore that in favor of the mood so, back on topic." She held up her stick. "If you can cut this with your sword it's your win. If you can't before we're done today, it's mine. Got it?"
"Right!" I nodded. "Bring it on!"
Spoiler alert, I lost the bet.
Ah, the morning of saturday.
A weekend free of school!
Man I can hardly believe it's been an entire week since I first became a magical girl. Or rather, it feels like it's been more than a week.
I've been so busy I've neglected to do something. Something of vital importance. It was ten am in the morning so Mom was working at the cafe and Twirl's body should've crashed so she can't be watching through any hidden camera or anything.
Though just to make sure I thoroughly sweeped through my room. After throwing out all the ones I did find, I was ready.
Giddy, I transformed into my magical girl form before glancing into the mirror.
"Ehehehe…" I giggled, the red haired girl in the mirror following my movements as we both touched are twintails. "I haven't had a chance to do this since sunday. Ah~"
Yep, my twintails were the best. There was just something about them that was so entrancing, so hypnotizing…
If I could I'd probably just spend the entire day admiring them.
Wait I think there was a word for this. Narcissita? It started with a Nar I know that for sure.
I'm pretty sure that was a bad thing as well.
But you know, I couldn't stop myself either. I should count my lucky blessings that I got to see these twintails with my own eyes, even if they do belong to me.
Ah, there was still a few hours until I had to meet the Guildy. I could probably just stay here right?
[] Head to the mall, you need to find a gift for Lan
[] Stay here, how do you even spend six hours at a mall?
+16 EXP Metal Wolf Chaos
+3 EXP Magical Girl Boot Camp lesson two: Don't make stupid bets
19 EXP gained = 43 EXP
