[X] Stay with Ilya until she wakes up.
- [X] Regenerate damage done to you during the fight if it didn't healed already.
Ilya looks so peaceful; there's none of the usual signs of dismemberment, no indication that she's in pain or suffering. If she were under a blanket, someone might not notice that anything is wrong. But she is hurt, and it's all your fault. You brush her hair a few more times before looking around the room. A light blanket is draped over a large stuffed chair … maybe someone's private office or study? You take the blanket and get it under Ilya, so she isn't cold from the desk, and then wrap it over her to keep her warm.
"It's not your fault, Flan." Headless tries to comfort you, to let you sink into her, but you push her away.
"Yes it is. If I'd done something, if I'd done anything, this wouldn't have happened." Headless sighs.
"Look, Flan, she didn't want you to get involved, anyway, so -!" Headless shuts up at the wave of power directed at her, and you squeeze your eyes shut, clench your hands - you won't stand to hear Ilya blamed for what happened when it was your fault. Even if it's true. You stand by her bedside, eyes closed.
"Lady Flandre." Sella is standing in the doorway, looking irritated. "I cannot order you, but there are several things that need to be done. Your assistance would be appreciated." You stare at her dully for a moment before nodding.
"… I'll stay here and take care of Ilya," you say. Sella's expression darkens - she's no doubt furious with you for thinking to take care of Ilya when it was your own fault she got hurt - and you look back down at your friend. Your clones skitter away from you and line up next to Sella. "They'll listen to you." The servant takes a deep breath and holds it for several seconds before releasing it in a similarly long exhalation.
"Thank you, Lady Flandre." Disappointment? You nod once, barely, and she leaves the room, your clones following obediently. She details one of them to help Deis, another to carry Leysritt to her room - and then to go to Deis as well - and the third to follow her to see if Tohsaka and Archer need any help. You keep a dim track of them as you stand guard over Ilya - Deis gets angry about something, but with the clones' help Ershin is moved into the garage and the wreckage of the cars taken to her for use in repairing the broken armor; and Tohsaka seems well enough that the clone's help is unnecessary, so she sends it to clean up the mess outside - but they're just observations. You stand there, watching, as guilt and self-loathing war within you.
Ilya's eyes open quickly, but she squeezes them shut almost immediately, and you stiffen worriedly. After a few seconds she relaxes, breathing normally, and finally opens her eyes and smiles at you. You hunch your shoulders and look down.
"It's alright, Flan. We'll figure something out." You shake your head.
"I'm sorry, Ilya."
"Hm? What happened?" You clench your fists, almost wishing you could just not tell her … but it's your fault.
"I was there, outside. I could have done something - anything I would have done would have kept you from being hurt. But I didn't do anything, and …."
"Hmm." Ilya is quiet for several seconds, thinking about what you just said. "Rin told you, didn't she? And I specifically told her not to tell you. And I guess you finished the matter - are you okay?" You nod - what little damage you'd taken had been fixed before Tohno died - and Ilya peers at you. You draw back a little. "Really, Flan, what's wrong? What happened to me isn't your fault, and it's not like I'm dead yet, so why does it bother you?"
"Because I keep doing this - people I care about, they keep getting hurt because of me, of things that I do." You're pretty clear on that - what else would you think about, sitting there with nothing to do except watch Ilya?
"Oh? What do you mean?" Your wings curl around you and you sit on the floor, leaning against the desk.
"I … I - hurt Remilia, my sister. I did something I never should have done, and it hurt her a lot. I broke Lutecia's arm, and it's my fault she was possessed. I kept hurting Agito, too, and if I'd been paying more attention she wouldn't have been poisoned in the ambush. Deis lost her body because of how I fought Berserker. And now … this … and Ershin's damaged, too and Leysritt got hurt. Even the vampires from Volkihar died because of me! And … and … I don't like it, it's like …."
"Like a curse?"
"Like Tohsaka was right about me." Or maybe that you should find a deep hole and just … sleep. And if Remilia needs your power, she can wake you up. Ilya is quiet for a while again before finally thumping the desk.
"Flan, come up here - at least stand up so I can see you." You turn and stand to face her - she's frowning, but she smiles when she sees you. "Good. I'd have gotten down, but it's a little hard to manage that without falling over right now. Just to be clear, what's really bothering you isn't that people you care about were hurt, but that you think you should have been able to prevent them from being hurt, right? I won't ask you about your sister, but I know about some of the others. You hurt Lutecia when you were hurting and in pain, right? That wasn't your fault, because you couldn't think clearly enough to know what you were doing. And you can't be blamed for a god's actions, either. And you can't be faulted for not knowing where the attackers are when you're being ambushed!" You raise your shoulders angrily, about to interrupt, but Ilya holds up her hand. "No, Flandre. You're powerful, and you're not used to being around people as fragile as humans are. It's not your fault any more than it's your fault that you're not all-powerful. The most you can be blamed for is doing things you like doing." She pauses and you take the opportunity to respond.
"But it is my fault. It's because of me that they got hurt. I met them and brought them along and changed their lives, so it is my fault." Ilya looks at you for a moment before turning to stare at the ceiling.
"I'm going to need to use couches from now on, aren't I?" Her hand reaches out to hold your arm. "But you don't care about Rin getting hurt because of your actions, right? Right, she's not your friend. Hehe! Anyway, Deis isn't your fault either - she knew what was coming and decided to face it anyway. If she'd just gotten out of the way instead of trying to fight Berserker her body would have been fine. As far as Ershin and Leys … without knowing exactly what happened I can't give a concrete answer, but it's the same situation as with me: you can be surprised, you're not all-powerful, and it wasn't your fault. I'm more to blame for this than you are - she was willing to talk, but I forced her into a fight. That I underestimated her is my own fault. Anyway. I suppose what it boils down to is that, yes, someone could blame you for people getting hurt, and if you were being completely unreasonable you might blame yourself for people you care about getting hurt as a result of your actions, but that would be silly. So which is more important, Flan? To have met people and cared about them, even if bad things happen to them that you might have been able to prevent if you acted in some other way? Or to have never met them, never have their friendship, and therefore not care when something happens to them?" She tugs your arm, pulling you forward until you're leaning over her, then touches your cheek. "I can't say anything about how Lutecia feels, or anyone else you've met - I can't say anything about how you feel - but I, at least, am glad to have met you and to have your friendship." Tears start forming in your eyes, and Ilya pulls you into a hug as you begin to cry.
You finally pull yourself off of Ilya and start wiping your face. She's still smiling at you, but on a closer look she seems really tired. "Feel better?" You finish cleaning up and nod, and her expression turns a little embarrassed. "Um, I feel kind of bad asking you this, but I really should talk to Sella about how things are going and what's going to happen. Would you mind taking me to her? I would have Berserker do it, but I don't want to destroy any walls unless I have to."
What do you do?
[ ] Take her to Sella.
- [ ] Then go see Deis.
[ ] Have your clones bring Sella here.
- [ ] Then go see Deis.
[ ] Other?