Critian Caceorte
Currently Suffering from Space-Time Narcolepsy
- Location
- Washington State
[X] Give up. Whatever she has in mind, she's paying for it. You'll keep going until you run out of batteries.
Fate/White Parmesan
- Thread starter AnonymousRabbit
- Start date
- Mature Fantasy Modern
Garrison
Ah, thats how you put things down here.
Wow, that's a big fucking yikes from me.
[x] Fine. She wants to go out, then two can play at that game. You'll visit Scathach, that'll make her miserable.
- Location
- New York
I really want to see a sequel to this if rider and Brie survive together to accidentally end up in the fate grand order universe.
Always Late
Lacking in coffee, sleep, and brains
- Location
- Ohio
[X] Fine. She wants to go out, then two can play at that game. You'll visit Scathach, that'll make her miserable.
[X] Give up. Whatever she has in mind, she's paying for it. You'll keep going until you run out of batteries.
[x] Fine. She wants to go out, then two can play at that game. You'll visit Scathach, that'll make her miserable.
Not us. No matter how ephemeral, how fleeting it may be, we shall not stop until these hands grasp OT3! Layer upon layer!
WAIFU SHIELDS!
Some Magus seek to win the Grail to find a way to enter the Root. Some Magus would seek to study the bond between Master and Servant to advance their families research into reaching Root.
Not us. No matter how ephemeral, how fleeting it may be, we shall not stop until these hands grasp OT3! Layer upon layer!
WAIFU SHIELDS!
Zeroth Jupi
Sporadic Writer and Haver of Ideas
- Location
- Somewhere
- Pronouns
- He/She/They
[X] Give up. Whatever she has in mind, she's paying for it. You'll keep going until you run out of batteries.
AnonymousRabbit
Rabbit Faced
10 minutes
Always Late
Lacking in coffee, sleep, and brains
- Location
- Ohio
We're gonna need all the waifus to survive Coo-Coo-Lane.
Shame we can't get Emiya to bring Artoria over here.
AnonymousRabbit
Rabbit Faced
Votes closed
- Location
- Florida
[x] Fine. She wants to go out, then two can play at that game. You'll visit Scathach, that'll make her miserable.
A Quiet Time
AnonymousRabbit
Rabbit Faced
[] Give up. Whatever she has in mind, she's paying for it. You'll keep going until you run out of batteries.
You stared at her obnoxious face as she dangled your phone in front of you. She was really trying extra hard today. You haven't heard anything from people that mattered but you would expect some form of message to drop by later. After that things would just go downhill depending on what happens next.
Still, whatever she had cooked up in that head of hers must be eating at what sense she has. It would be better to not go against it and just humor her. Still, a date in the middle of the war or was she just trying to get you killed somehow? Oh right, she's a moron so she might have not thought of that.
"Okay. Let's go," you relented with a sigh before your phone was dropped. You caught it as Rider gave you a dumb smile.
"I knew you'd say yes. Good. Now let's go," Rider said as she pulled you up and dragged you along.
No way you could fight this. Not with how your body currently was, you're sooner to break down than gain any ground in an argument.
......
.....
....
Surprisingly enough, Medb didn't bring you to a mall or a clothing store. She didn't even bring you to a restaurant to eat and talk but instead she brought you to a place you didn't expect. You looked at the interior of the public library to find that it was filled with thousands of books from a shelf on one end to the other. It was an entire building reserved for the storage of paperback materials.
Medb walked by your side and wrote down your name on the logbook before guiding you forward. You weren't sure why she brought you here but she might be getting productive after all. You might start being happy with her if she was willing to help out.
Maybe you can even find a way to beat Berserker or Lancer when it came to it. Perhaps you can even look up and find clues regarding Archer here. You still didn't know much about him though and you haven't discerned his identity.
Medb hasn't told you who Lancer was but she should spill the beans. She also had an idea on who Berserker was so that end was covered. She just led you through the shelves though, straight into general history where there were a few people.
"So why the library?" You asked as you picked up a book regarding Irish history and skimmed through it, "I never took you for the bookish type."
"Well I figured you'd be able to rest better with how quiet it is here," Rider said as she crossed her arms looking damned proud of herself. She also gently pinned you against a shelf, "Also, it's a rather isolated place where people could get away with some... Thrilling-GAK!"
You smacked her head with a book, "You've been hanging around some weird websites again, haven't you?"
"You wouldn't believe the things I've seen!" Rider said with a hiss.
"SHHH!"
You and Medb as you were no doubt shushed by the old lady at the reception desk. You both winced before she rubbed her head while you looked down at your book before putting it back.
"If you want to start a career, you should have asked around. Why me?" You frowned as you tried picking out another book.
"Well, somehow you're the closest person I could grab. But that's besides the point. Anyway, this place is no fun since you won't play nice. Let's beat it," Rider said but you didn't budge as she pulled you.
"Sorry, I'm working right now. How about you help me live through this war, huh?" You asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Ugh... Fine. I doubt looking through books would save us now..." Rider said as she crossed her arms.
"Well I can't just sit around doing nothing while you drown in pleasure, you pervert... What do you know about Berserker and Lancer?" You asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Lancer is Ferdiad," Rider pointed out with a distasteful look.
Your eyes widened at that before looking to her, "Oh..."
"What?" Rider frowned at you.
"Fuck, that guy's Cu Chulainn's battle buddy... And you bullied him into fighting his Bro," you recounted as you tapped your cheek, "Damn, Queen. You did him dirty."
"Well I had to throw someone strong! Cu was just too strong and cool!" Medb said as she stamped her foot.
"SHHH!"
You both winced at that before you blinked. Didn't she have Druids and stuff curse the guy until he went to her camp before she got him drunk on her mead until he agreed to fight for her?
"Is he mad?" You asked.
"He's mad- Stop getting a kick out of my misery. That's my thing," Medb huffed as she crossed her arms.
"I love it when you suffer karmic justice," you chuckled as she looked like she was about to blow a gasket, "I mean, you're an asshole."
"And so are you, asshole," Rider hissed as she turned her nose up.
"And that's why we're stuck together... Good job. Well, if legend's correct, all we have to do is shove something in his ass," you recalled as you rubbed your chin.
"You're disgusting but I approve," Rider replied with a mildly disturbed look.
"So what about Berserker?" You wondered as you looked up the shelf.
"Riastrad... Warp Spasm. Lancer mentioned it when we met. So it's truly him. It's Cu Chulainn," Rider said with a grim expression, "You know what that means?"
"We're sort of fucked. I know the general stuff... It's essentially him hulking out, right?" You asked her.
Rider nodded, "Yes. He turns into a monster capable of flattening the entire city if let loose. I can see why Hans is wary."
"I'll try looking into his weakness... If he has any," you said as you crossed your arms.
"Brie, I didn't take you here to work but don't overdo it, okay? You can read,something else if you want," Rider told you as she placed a hand on her hip.
You smiled at her as she huffed before walking by you. She must be off to find a place to lounge about. You can use this time to try and figure something out about your situation...
-[] About Cu Chulainn
-[] About Ferdiad
-[] About Medb
-[] About Scathach
-[] About Carmilla
[] You didn't find anything... But you could feel your Command Seals sting.
[] Rider's right, maybe you should find something to help you rest better. Maybe a big book that'll bore you to sleep.
[] Write in...
You stared at her obnoxious face as she dangled your phone in front of you. She was really trying extra hard today. You haven't heard anything from people that mattered but you would expect some form of message to drop by later. After that things would just go downhill depending on what happens next.
Still, whatever she had cooked up in that head of hers must be eating at what sense she has. It would be better to not go against it and just humor her. Still, a date in the middle of the war or was she just trying to get you killed somehow? Oh right, she's a moron so she might have not thought of that.
"Okay. Let's go," you relented with a sigh before your phone was dropped. You caught it as Rider gave you a dumb smile.
"I knew you'd say yes. Good. Now let's go," Rider said as she pulled you up and dragged you along.
No way you could fight this. Not with how your body currently was, you're sooner to break down than gain any ground in an argument.
......
.....
....
Surprisingly enough, Medb didn't bring you to a mall or a clothing store. She didn't even bring you to a restaurant to eat and talk but instead she brought you to a place you didn't expect. You looked at the interior of the public library to find that it was filled with thousands of books from a shelf on one end to the other. It was an entire building reserved for the storage of paperback materials.
Medb walked by your side and wrote down your name on the logbook before guiding you forward. You weren't sure why she brought you here but she might be getting productive after all. You might start being happy with her if she was willing to help out.
Maybe you can even find a way to beat Berserker or Lancer when it came to it. Perhaps you can even look up and find clues regarding Archer here. You still didn't know much about him though and you haven't discerned his identity.
Medb hasn't told you who Lancer was but she should spill the beans. She also had an idea on who Berserker was so that end was covered. She just led you through the shelves though, straight into general history where there were a few people.
"So why the library?" You asked as you picked up a book regarding Irish history and skimmed through it, "I never took you for the bookish type."
"Well I figured you'd be able to rest better with how quiet it is here," Rider said as she crossed her arms looking damned proud of herself. She also gently pinned you against a shelf, "Also, it's a rather isolated place where people could get away with some... Thrilling-GAK!"
You smacked her head with a book, "You've been hanging around some weird websites again, haven't you?"
"You wouldn't believe the things I've seen!" Rider said with a hiss.
"SHHH!"
You and Medb as you were no doubt shushed by the old lady at the reception desk. You both winced before she rubbed her head while you looked down at your book before putting it back.
"If you want to start a career, you should have asked around. Why me?" You frowned as you tried picking out another book.
"Well, somehow you're the closest person I could grab. But that's besides the point. Anyway, this place is no fun since you won't play nice. Let's beat it," Rider said but you didn't budge as she pulled you.
"Sorry, I'm working right now. How about you help me live through this war, huh?" You asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Ugh... Fine. I doubt looking through books would save us now..." Rider said as she crossed her arms.
"Well I can't just sit around doing nothing while you drown in pleasure, you pervert... What do you know about Berserker and Lancer?" You asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Lancer is Ferdiad," Rider pointed out with a distasteful look.
Your eyes widened at that before looking to her, "Oh..."
"What?" Rider frowned at you.
"Fuck, that guy's Cu Chulainn's battle buddy... And you bullied him into fighting his Bro," you recounted as you tapped your cheek, "Damn, Queen. You did him dirty."
"Well I had to throw someone strong! Cu was just too strong and cool!" Medb said as she stamped her foot.
"SHHH!"
You both winced at that before you blinked. Didn't she have Druids and stuff curse the guy until he went to her camp before she got him drunk on her mead until he agreed to fight for her?
"Is he mad?" You asked.
"He's mad- Stop getting a kick out of my misery. That's my thing," Medb huffed as she crossed her arms.
"I love it when you suffer karmic justice," you chuckled as she looked like she was about to blow a gasket, "I mean, you're an asshole."
"And so are you, asshole," Rider hissed as she turned her nose up.
"And that's why we're stuck together... Good job. Well, if legend's correct, all we have to do is shove something in his ass," you recalled as you rubbed your chin.
"You're disgusting but I approve," Rider replied with a mildly disturbed look.
"So what about Berserker?" You wondered as you looked up the shelf.
"Riastrad... Warp Spasm. Lancer mentioned it when we met. So it's truly him. It's Cu Chulainn," Rider said with a grim expression, "You know what that means?"
"We're sort of fucked. I know the general stuff... It's essentially him hulking out, right?" You asked her.
Rider nodded, "Yes. He turns into a monster capable of flattening the entire city if let loose. I can see why Hans is wary."
"I'll try looking into his weakness... If he has any," you said as you crossed your arms.
"Brie, I didn't take you here to work but don't overdo it, okay? You can read,something else if you want," Rider told you as she placed a hand on her hip.
You smiled at her as she huffed before walking by you. She must be off to find a place to lounge about. You can use this time to try and figure something out about your situation...
A Quiet Time
[] You tried finding a book... (1)
-[] About Cu Chulainn
-[] About Ferdiad
-[] About Medb
-[] About Scathach
-[] About Carmilla
[] You didn't find anything... But you could feel your Command Seals sting.
[] Rider's right, maybe you should find something to help you rest better. Maybe a big book that'll bore you to sleep.
[] Write in...
taovkool
Forever Gone
- Location
- The Library, Department of General Works
[X] You didn't find anything... But you could feel your Command Seals sting.
Tempted to go for a Cu Chulainn book for hints on how to stop his Riastrad. Something about being dunked on water, I think?
Then again, another Master is in the library.
Tempted to go for a Cu Chulainn book for hints on how to stop his Riastrad. Something about being dunked on water, I think?
Then again, another Master is in the library.
Hammers_Bjorn
Eternally Clueless
- Location
- Jakarta
[X] You tried finding a book... (1)
-[X] About Cu Chulainn
Huh. Does Cu even have a weakness that isn't his weird attachment to Geas? I don't know much on British myths other than King Arthur (and thats mostly from Fate and Monty Python) so I'm drawing nothing here.
And I swear to god if Olga shows her face again, she's getting a mouthful of rainbow sword, indecent method of killing or no.
-[X] About Cu Chulainn
Huh. Does Cu even have a weakness that isn't his weird attachment to Geas? I don't know much on British myths other than King Arthur (and thats mostly from Fate and Monty Python) so I'm drawing nothing here.
And I swear to god if Olga shows her face again, she's getting a mouthful of rainbow sword, indecent method of killing or no.
Always Late
Lacking in coffee, sleep, and brains
- Location
- Ohio
... well that's better than expected.
Aw, how sweet and thoughtful of yo-
... right, this is Medb, why did I expect anything else?
And no comment about whether Ferdiad was actually Cu's lover. Oh well, guess we'll have to figure that out ourselves.
Yes, but you're an even bigger one. You're our asshole.
Hm. Let's see. What deets about Cu's death are relevant?
[X] You tried finding a book... (1)
-[X] About Cu Chulainn
So there's a few elements to how Cu finally bought the farm:
1. Breaking his Geass. This is a powerful contract, as evidenced even in the modern day Moonlit world. By getting outsmarted into a no-win state of either refusing hospitality or eating unclean meat, Cu was stripped of the super-strength in his left side and became destined to die. That's something we may use for a setup.
2. Three magical spears were acquired* to slay him, each empowered with a prophecy of slaying a king. Two got through Cu's friends, his horse and chariot-driver. The third mortally wounded him, as he was Ireland's King of Heroes**, but then he pulled the whole 'tie me to a rock so I can use Warp Spasm for a full day after I died' bullshit.
3. The 'hero-light' of Cu that fueled his power only stops when his sword-arm and hand is cut from his body. Even when decapitated, his sword cuts off Lugiad's hand in retaliation.
Given Berserker Cu is influenced predominantly by the Warp Spasm, the two most relevant things will be the hand and the Geass. If BerserCu is so unthinking he'll break an oath, he'll lose more and of his strength, and probably his regeneration. If we can cut off his sword-hand, then that's likley to do major damage if not slay him outright. But of course, someone'll have to pay the price of success...
*And by acquired, I mean three Druids literally shit-talked Cu's kingdom, family, and honor so he'd throwing each one at them, which killed them, and then Lugiad chucked it right back.
**Yes, Cu literally has the same title as Gilgamesh. It's hilarious.
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Tiny_Dic
Carbon Cringe Lifeform | Hyperborean Coomer
- Location
- My Room
[x] You didn't find anything... But you could feel your Command Seals sting.
BTW, the bit about Ferdiad having to be stabbed through his anus is a real thing, and includes:
>Cu stabbing Ferdiad with his 'Gay Bulge' in his anus
>Laeg pulling out said 'Gay Bulge'
>Cu weeping for his husbando, lost to thw Celtic shipping wars
BTW, the bit about Ferdiad having to be stabbed through his anus is a real thing, and includes:
>Cu stabbing Ferdiad with his 'Gay Bulge' in his anus
>Laeg pulling out said 'Gay Bulge'
>Cu weeping for his husbando, lost to thw Celtic shipping wars
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[X] You tried finding a book... (1)
-[X] About Cu Chulainn
We've jammed cheese into Medb's mouth. We can jam puppies into Cu.
What stopped his charge was a wall of bare tits.
-[X] About Cu Chulainn
We've jammed cheese into Medb's mouth. We can jam puppies into Cu.
Naw, the water was needed to disperse the heat.
What stopped his charge was a wall of bare tits.
Always Late
Lacking in coffee, sleep, and brains
- Location
- Ohio
One of the general taboos of Ireland at the time, and stuff he just personally didn't like, was for warriors to never kill a woman. And it wasn't just that 150 naked women got Cu settled down. That quasi-ritualistic act just got him to look away and not resist being tied up by the king's men for the aforementioned dunkings. After the third barrel, he was chill again, pun intended, and the rage was done.
