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Dragon Harem Quest - Or: Saying You Were Gay Wasn't The Conversation-Ender You Hoped For

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Oh Dear.

...Oh Dear. They don't know about the wizard husbangoo do they? Well, I'm sure after a century or two on the receiving end of an oubliette spell they'll have learnt their lesson.

Stealing from a dragon who has a wizard personfriend is possibly one of the worst decisions I've ever seen, and I remember Boris Johnson's campaign to become prime minister.
 
This is not the kind of home-wrecking fox Omegahugger was expecting.

Alternatively: This is the first time "*Insert Thief* stole the precious thing" has been literal.

ZerbanDaGreat said:
Though its features marked it as native to the land across the sea, not Jun-ho's homeland but close enough to be lumped in by the casual viewer,
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I'M SORRY FOR REPEATEDLY GETTING YOUR NAME WRONG, OKAY? ;_;

ZerbanDaGreat said:
"No, no they may not," Issachar said patiently. "I may not know of your kind in any specific fashion, but I do know people, and I know people like you just fine. More than enough to tell you, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that this path will lead to no peace. Even this fresh triumph of yours will turn to ashes sooner than you think. Just ti send you off in search of another, and another, and another, as all victories built off the backs of selfishness and self-delusion poison their fruits like sour-"

Takara hurled a pellet at their feet, releasing a thick cloud of cloying dark grey smoke. Once it finally cleared they were gone without a trace, not so much as footprints or bent grass to prove that they were ever there. Issachar just remained silent and still, lips still parted as if ready to continue his lecture if Takara came back. Slowly, thoughtfully, he raised one hand and scratched at the short stubble on his jaw.

"Well," he said. "Did not maintain control of that situation."
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Issachar has the patience of an angel.
 
Jokes on Takara, the map is still attuned to us.
She can probally So solve that easily but oh wel.
What She probally cannot solve is:
>An angry Blue Dragon
>A FURIOUS Ifrit
>An incubus
>An eastern Dragon
>A wizard
>Whatever the fuck Isaschar is
>However else we have pulled into our excidental harem.

And d'aww, Makram cares.
He hates it when people pretend to be HIS big Blue baby.

Lets hope Abzu can track the map
He seems like the type.
Or we could use wish Takara and the map to us and I am pretty sure Makram won't fuck us on this.
He wants vengeance for this shit.
 
I feel the need to note that I still love Takara. But now I also want to strangle them.

Though I'm also wondering if their absence from the Bestiary is intentional on Zerban's part.

Anyway, it's a good thing the decision was to do something not emotionally draining, because Eldingar is going to feel deeply upset about this.

Also, I like how Issachar's response is to appear out of the shadows and start lecturing. Actually, all of the reactions to Takara were good.
 
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Eldingar, sounding betrayed: I thought you were a potential husbando
Takara: Thats cute Dear -hrk- but can you get the talons kf my throat? We might try something~
Eldingar: Oh No Makram wants you dead
Makram: very~!
Abzu [Nice place you got here!][Good defenses too, against most non wizard With No Dragon back up!]
Jung-ho: Can finish quickly Please?
Issachar: But I still need to lecture her.
Makram: I still need to murder her!
Belial, the distance: WoW, they have a great taste in suits, let me Tell you!
Takara: Hey! Get out of my closet!
Makram: Oh Dear, you have more to worry about...
 
Lizard Knight said:
Jokes on Takara, the map is still attuned to us.
She can probally So solve that easily but oh wel.
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I wonder if they know the map directs you to what you want most in the world?

It'd be funny if it turns out that all Takara wants deep down is to be loved and so the map barely changes at all from its current configuration after attuning to them.
 
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Origami Clock said:
...Oh Dear. They don't know about the wizard husbangoo do they? Well, I'm sure after a century or two on the receiving end of an oubliette spell they'll have learnt their lesson.
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Do we really want to create Kitsune Edmond Dantes though? The Count of Monte Cristo was not calling out for more fox ears.

Still, Takara didn't do anything especially terrible. Light injuries, and plenty of humiliation to our precious, precious boys, but they didn't so much as touch or despoil the rest of the hoard. Interesting. I wonder if this was always the plan, or this was Takara thinking on the fly. We did spill the beans about the map when they were introducing themselves. Or, of course, maybe this is the long game.

However given this timeframe, we can pretty safely rule out Takara and Amina being the same person. The time frame would be way to tight. And now I doubt they'd be working together, as Amina probably wouldn't have anything to gain from creating distress or upsetting her employer.
 
Well, someone's going to be very dead when a certain gay dragon protag finds out what happened.
 
ZerbanDaGreat said:
Interlude Two - The Homewrecking Fox
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Oh no.
ZerbanDaGreat said:
"Okay," Jun-ho replied, a little dejected, and slumped down with his chin on his crossed forelegs.
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TAKARA CONFIRMED FOR HISTORY'S GREATEST MONSTER :mad:
ZerbanDaGreat said:
When he looked up it was just in time to see Takara blow Eldingar's diminished treasurepile apart with a similar outpouring of force, sending gold and jewels flying wildly all across the room like precious shrapnel as only the crystal-inlaid map tube was left in its proper place.
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AAAAA OUR HOARD
 
I mean... do we even NEED the map? we know where all the points of light were, unless they go running off. And that assuming that we're getting more boyfriends after these six.
 
Unbanshee said:
I mean... do we even NEED the map? we know where all the points of light were, unless they go running off. And that assuming that we're getting more boyfriends after these six.
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considering the high quality of boyfriends we've acquired, I want to see how deep Zerban's Wild Ride Goes wrt handsome monster people who need dates.
 
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Unbanshee said:
I mean... do we even NEED the map? we know where all the points of light were, unless they go running off. And that assuming that we're getting more boyfriends after these six.
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Presumeably, once Eldin's boyfriend desires have been sated the map will start showing us what he desires most at that point. I. E. literal treasure.

And if you try to convince me we don't need actual treasures I may have to fire my non-existant laserbeams across the internet.
 
LupineVolt said:
considering the high quality of boyfriends we've acquired, I want to see how deep Zerban's Wild Ride Goes wrt handsome monster people who need dates.
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Lets be honest
For all we know this is part of the wild ride
For all we know we storm Takara's place and go out carrying their luggage
As they are moving in with us.
With I am trying to say
For all we know this is how Takara flirts, by stealing from you and daring to steal back.
All I know is that I want that map, as it is indeed our ticket to Zerban's wilde ride
 
So, uh...blah blah Tamamo, blah blah History's Greatest Monster.

That aside, our bois just got shown up pretty hard, and Eldingar's got some 'splaining to do.

I suspect that this will be an ideal time for Zerban to write his hurt/comfort fics.
 
Yeah you do not mess with A dragon's hoard and take the husbando radar. Eldingar might be a socially awkward NEET with issues but he's still a dragon. We should show that shapeshifter what happens when you royally piss one off.
 
LupineVolt said:
considering the high quality of boyfriends we've acquired, I want to see how deep Zerban's Wild Ride Goes wrt handsome monster people who need dates.
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Also if we end up with too many cute boys and boy-adjacent persons to practically date them all we can start setting them up with each other and turn the lair into some kind of free love commune
 
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