Higure
Witch of Faith
- Location
- The Golden Land
Pretty sure he exceeded that level of edge a while ago.
Seriously, De3ta. Don't read the whole thing. You shouldn't have to go through that.
De3ta reads....Ambience: A Fleet Symphony.
- Thread starter De3ta
- Start date
Seriously, De3ta. Don't read the whole thing. You shouldn't have to go through that.
- Location
- Australia
A/N:
This is gonna be long.
On May 8, 2014, after barely getting on the Kantai hype train some several weeks earlier, I drew up a synopsis for a Kantai Collection fanfiction. This is a story I've told a few times before: it was in my sophomore college dormitory, with my bags packed and waiting for my dad to show up so we could drive back home for seven hours from one end of the state to the other, on an ASUS G74 laptop with a chiclet keyboard that I absolutely hated typing on because the keys sucked. Ironically enough, I remember the main reason for the genesis of Ambience: A Fleet Symphony was for me to have something to distract me while I tried to get a working proxy on my laptop so I could play the game myself and see what it was all about. At the time, all I had was a skeleton of a plot - it was almost an experimental story, a story in which I would write to my heart's content and create a crazy a world as possible because I didn't really know what it would amount to in the future. But what I did know was that many people who would happen to read it would not like it. Hell, even now, there are entire forum threads and Skype chatrooms out there filled with people who absolutely detest this work because of how unbelievable and implausible the first chapter seems to be. Is this even a Kantai Collection fanfiction? Why is your OC such a fucking Gary Stu/Mary Sue/insertderogatoryfanfictionlingohere? How can you even get away with writing a shitfest like this?
No, don't read it, they said. Spare yourself the time, they said. They wouldn't even wish having to read this on their worst enemy, they said, that's how bad it is.
Okay then.
On May 8, 2015, during my semester abroad in Hirakata City, Osaka Prefecture, I was sitting in my room in my host family's home with the same laptop with the crappy chiclet keyboard, sitting in my room in my host family's house. The Kantai Collection anime that aired earlier that year gave the Kantai fanfiction page a good boost of attention, and more people started seeing my stories. Many of you first heard of or started reading around this time, and some of you are now among my most frequent reviewers. The start of 2015 was when I decided to forget about all of the stories I had written up to that point and invest all my energy and time into developing the two Kantai Collection fanfictions that I had under my belt at the time: A:AFS, and the one that is somehow still widely read to this day, Ambience: Platoon | Moebius Four, because by this time, I had developed plans and a much more in-depth plot for A:AFS, and I had ideas in the works for A
M4, and I wanted to see these through.
My time in Japan was instrumental in getting my stories to the places where they are now because I was able to focus all of my free time into writing (whenever I wasn't playing games, that was). I typed at home on my personal laptop, I typed in my university student PC lab, in which many of the PCs there had terrible keyboards with keys that were sometimes stuck and the PCs themselves froze for about fifteen seconds the moment I pulled up Fanfiction site to start typing for some bizarre reason, and I even typed out entire chapters on my smartphone while my host parents took me around Osaka to familiarize me with the local shopping malls, restaurants, and trainlines, and then retyped those chapters back onto Fanfiction and published the chapters that way once I returned home. The writing grind was so real that I even added two more stories to my repertoire: Poi Days! and the One-Shot Fleet, though these are both more casual and leisurely stories that I write on occasion and started only because, like the two stories before it, I had spontaneously decided to write them.
Eat, sleep, write, repeat.
How many of you remember the months during which I wrote a chapter a day for AM4? Those were perhaps, in my mind, the glory days of my Fanfiction career. May 2015 remains the month with the largest amount of combined readership views for my stories at nearly 50,000. Compare this to my total amount of views for January 2015, which only numbered at around 11,000, and you can see just how much five months of consistent, dedicated writing had managed to accomplish. It was during those months, particularly May 2015, that my name and my stories achieved the status that they have now.
You may think I'm sounding like I'm tooting my own horn - don't worry, I'm getting somewhere with this.
Come May 8, 2016. The past year has had many unpredictable events for my stories, both A:AFS and AM4. I'm sure you know them yourselves - the death of the main character in A:AFS, and the abrupt, downer ending of AM4. In contrast to the "glory months", these events were very severe roadbumps for me - the very popular AM4, with its conclusion, turned off the vast majority of its readers from reading its successors, Ambience: Evaporated Summer, Ambience: Contingency Summer, and Ambience: No Thought Summer, and many readers of A:AFS were also turned off by the Fleet Log arc that I put in while I reworked the next arc of the story without Damon's presence and planned for a very long-term plot map.
At the end of the Fleet Log arc, at which time my final in-school semester was coming to a close, I decided that the way that I would set about bringing back the so-called "glory days" of my writing career was to power through my main story, A:AFS. I do want to and have plans to give AM4's successors the same treatment of daily chapter uploads, but I have so much at the moment on my head in plans for A:AFS that they may have to come later in the year. But this aside, I put A:ES, A:CS, and A:NTS as secondary stories and A:AFS back as my main story again, and just like my time in Japan, now that I no longer had to worry about university anywhere near as much with the turn of the new year, I began to write and write and write, to the point where, as many of you have already noted, I am uploading a chapter for A:AFS every other day, something I'm not sure anyone else can boast. And yes, I say boast, because this is the one thing about my stories I feel comfortable bragging about because I feel I have earned the right to do so. Sounds corny, I know, but it's a good feeling nonetheless.
I would like to make it clear that while basing one's own success in an amateur career of fanfiction writing merely on readership statistics and numbers is unnecessary and distracting, the numbers don't lie: since May 2015, I have never been able to break 30,000 total monthly views until last month of April 2016. And for me, I admit that this has sat on the back of my mind for the past year. But following my dedication to A:AFS after the Fleet Log arc, slowly, month after month, I have been seeing gradual increases to monthly readership. It's still nowhere near the height of AM4, but so long as I keep this dedication unhindered and fueled, I will get there again. And I'll be honest, I consider AM4, while I did put time and thought into writing it, a bit of a lucky strike, because I didn't think it would receive the amounts of readership that it has - remember, it was only meant to be a story for me to write for fun because I was also living in Japan as a foreign transfer student at the time, as was a similar synopsis for the story itself. To this day, AM4, despite being completed nearly a year ago, still consistently receives several thousand views a month over all these months, more than all of my other active stories combined.
I want to have the feeling of my "glory days" again. Again, it sounds quite corny, but those are the days that I look back at with the most nostalgia, but this time around, I want to get there again on the back of my main story, A:AFS, the story I have by far spent and invested the most time into writing. AM4 wasn't a long-term story, but A:AFS is. A:AFS is the story I want to be known for the most; I've spent the good parts of the last two years making this a reality, and it remains my intention to keep up this grind. Because this is the grind that has led me to this point in my story-writing career:
The 200th chapter, breaking 2 million words.
It's funny because the timing of the events in my life have been quite uncanny. Around the 170 chapter mark, I quickly did some math and found that if I were to upload a chapter with at least ten thousand words every other day, I would be able to meet the deadline of lining up the 200th chapter breaking the 2 million word mark on the second anniversary of this story. And this weekend, I will be driving back up to my university with my family to graduate; the following weeks afterwards, I will help my folks move out of the place we'd lived in for eleven and a half years to a proper home, something my folks had always dreamed of owning. Perhaps this is symbolic, and if it is, I guess I wouldn't have it any other way.
I've seen many other Kantai fanfic stories rise and fall over the months - one of them being my own. I've seen the detractors raise their pitchforks and light their torches as they rise up from the depths of the mysterious dark ocean we call the Internet in self-righteous fury at the unforgivable flaws of my work, because truth be told, they very well may be right. Both A:AFS and AM4 started out as stories whose plots I came up with in less than a handful of minutes, stories that were started on mere whims. And because of their ugly duckling geneses, I realize that my stories have some glaring problems with them, biased or not, as others have courteously (or not so courteously) pointed out to me; not to mention the fact that all my life, I have been a strong proponent of maintaining a balance of friends and enemies to prevent the deterioration of the mind and spirit. But this being said, it seems to me that recently, my name and my work have managed to gain a level of infamy I myself never saw coming. Now is a time for me to say now and forever, that never once have I claimed to be a competent author. Never once did I have plans to turn any of my stories into the greatest pieces of fanfiction ever. It just so happened one day that I thought to myself, "hey, I've got an interesting idea, let me write it down", and a two million word story sprung up from there two years down the line, and this isn't even me trying to demonstrate a kind of passive-aggressive humility. It just so happened that I decided to keep writing because I kept getting more and more ideas that I felt would be fun to write, and along the way, slowly but surely, more and more people began to take notice and were kind enough to grant me their attention and readership. It has always been, and will always remain, a solitary journey for me, a sort of...let me say, "personal travel", a test of dedication to see just how far my mind can take a single story; think a journey of a thousand miles, except in a literary sense. Whether I gain fame or notoriety because of the work and time I put into building these stories of mine is only relevant to the point of my recognition of it, and no more.
But regardless, whatever happens, you can be sure that come another year from now, I will still be writing, and you will still see A:AFS and others at the top of the Kantai page at the beginning of the day for your reading pleasure...or displeasure, should you so choose to accept it.
Thank you very much to everyone who has reviewed, favorited, followed, and shared both my name and my stories. Even to my detractors whose names I may not remember or know (or care to know) but whose comments I remember extremely well, I must extend my thanks - it wouldn't be a journey if there was no opposition, to fuel me to prove you wrong, that indeed, a single insane mind with too much time on his hands can still write a crazy story that's worth at least some people's time, if not yours. Because they can keep typing away in their forum threads and Skype chats about how bad my stories are, like some kind of secret Discord tech.
And that's okay. They can keep their blessings, for I was never welcome.
-Paul, a.k.a. Akyuu no Joshu
This is gonna be long.
On May 8, 2014, after barely getting on the Kantai hype train some several weeks earlier, I drew up a synopsis for a Kantai Collection fanfiction. This is a story I've told a few times before: it was in my sophomore college dormitory, with my bags packed and waiting for my dad to show up so we could drive back home for seven hours from one end of the state to the other, on an ASUS G74 laptop with a chiclet keyboard that I absolutely hated typing on because the keys sucked. Ironically enough, I remember the main reason for the genesis of Ambience: A Fleet Symphony was for me to have something to distract me while I tried to get a working proxy on my laptop so I could play the game myself and see what it was all about. At the time, all I had was a skeleton of a plot - it was almost an experimental story, a story in which I would write to my heart's content and create a crazy a world as possible because I didn't really know what it would amount to in the future. But what I did know was that many people who would happen to read it would not like it. Hell, even now, there are entire forum threads and Skype chatrooms out there filled with people who absolutely detest this work because of how unbelievable and implausible the first chapter seems to be. Is this even a Kantai Collection fanfiction? Why is your OC such a fucking Gary Stu/Mary Sue/insertderogatoryfanfictionlingohere? How can you even get away with writing a shitfest like this?
No, don't read it, they said. Spare yourself the time, they said. They wouldn't even wish having to read this on their worst enemy, they said, that's how bad it is.
Okay then.
On May 8, 2015, during my semester abroad in Hirakata City, Osaka Prefecture, I was sitting in my room in my host family's home with the same laptop with the crappy chiclet keyboard, sitting in my room in my host family's house. The Kantai Collection anime that aired earlier that year gave the Kantai fanfiction page a good boost of attention, and more people started seeing my stories. Many of you first heard of or started reading around this time, and some of you are now among my most frequent reviewers. The start of 2015 was when I decided to forget about all of the stories I had written up to that point and invest all my energy and time into developing the two Kantai Collection fanfictions that I had under my belt at the time: A:AFS, and the one that is somehow still widely read to this day, Ambience: Platoon | Moebius Four, because by this time, I had developed plans and a much more in-depth plot for A:AFS, and I had ideas in the works for A
M4, and I wanted to see these through.My time in Japan was instrumental in getting my stories to the places where they are now because I was able to focus all of my free time into writing (whenever I wasn't playing games, that was). I typed at home on my personal laptop, I typed in my university student PC lab, in which many of the PCs there had terrible keyboards with keys that were sometimes stuck and the PCs themselves froze for about fifteen seconds the moment I pulled up Fanfiction site to start typing for some bizarre reason, and I even typed out entire chapters on my smartphone while my host parents took me around Osaka to familiarize me with the local shopping malls, restaurants, and trainlines, and then retyped those chapters back onto Fanfiction and published the chapters that way once I returned home. The writing grind was so real that I even added two more stories to my repertoire: Poi Days! and the One-Shot Fleet, though these are both more casual and leisurely stories that I write on occasion and started only because, like the two stories before it, I had spontaneously decided to write them.
Eat, sleep, write, repeat.
How many of you remember the months during which I wrote a chapter a day for A
M4? Those were perhaps, in my mind, the glory days of my Fanfiction career. May 2015 remains the month with the largest amount of combined readership views for my stories at nearly 50,000. Compare this to my total amount of views for January 2015, which only numbered at around 11,000, and you can see just how much five months of consistent, dedicated writing had managed to accomplish. It was during those months, particularly May 2015, that my name and my stories achieved the status that they have now.You may think I'm sounding like I'm tooting my own horn - don't worry, I'm getting somewhere with this.
Come May 8, 2016. The past year has had many unpredictable events for my stories, both A:AFS and A
M4. I'm sure you know them yourselves - the death of the main character in A:AFS, and the abrupt, downer ending of AM4. In contrast to the "glory months", these events were very severe roadbumps for me - the very popular AM4, with its conclusion, turned off the vast majority of its readers from reading its successors, Ambience: Evaporated Summer, Ambience: Contingency Summer, and Ambience: No Thought Summer, and many readers of A:AFS were also turned off by the Fleet Log arc that I put in while I reworked the next arc of the story without Damon's presence and planned for a very long-term plot map.At the end of the Fleet Log arc, at which time my final in-school semester was coming to a close, I decided that the way that I would set about bringing back the so-called "glory days" of my writing career was to power through my main story, A:AFS. I do want to and have plans to give A
M4's successors the same treatment of daily chapter uploads, but I have so much at the moment on my head in plans for A:AFS that they may have to come later in the year. But this aside, I put A:ES, A:CS, and A:NTS as secondary stories and A:AFS back as my main story again, and just like my time in Japan, now that I no longer had to worry about university anywhere near as much with the turn of the new year, I began to write and write and write, to the point where, as many of you have already noted, I am uploading a chapter for A:AFS every other day, something I'm not sure anyone else can boast. And yes, I say boast, because this is the one thing about my stories I feel comfortable bragging about because I feel I have earned the right to do so. Sounds corny, I know, but it's a good feeling nonetheless.I would like to make it clear that while basing one's own success in an amateur career of fanfiction writing merely on readership statistics and numbers is unnecessary and distracting, the numbers don't lie: since May 2015, I have never been able to break 30,000 total monthly views until last month of April 2016. And for me, I admit that this has sat on the back of my mind for the past year. But following my dedication to A:AFS after the Fleet Log arc, slowly, month after month, I have been seeing gradual increases to monthly readership. It's still nowhere near the height of A
M4, but so long as I keep this dedication unhindered and fueled, I will get there again. And I'll be honest, I consider AM4, while I did put time and thought into writing it, a bit of a lucky strike, because I didn't think it would receive the amounts of readership that it has - remember, it was only meant to be a story for me to write for fun because I was also living in Japan as a foreign transfer student at the time, as was a similar synopsis for the story itself. To this day, AM4, despite being completed nearly a year ago, still consistently receives several thousand views a month over all these months, more than all of my other active stories combined.I want to have the feeling of my "glory days" again. Again, it sounds quite corny, but those are the days that I look back at with the most nostalgia, but this time around, I want to get there again on the back of my main story, A:AFS, the story I have by far spent and invested the most time into writing. A
M4 wasn't a long-term story, but A:AFS is. A:AFS is the story I want to be known for the most; I've spent the good parts of the last two years making this a reality, and it remains my intention to keep up this grind. Because this is the grind that has led me to this point in my story-writing career:The 200th chapter, breaking 2 million words.
It's funny because the timing of the events in my life have been quite uncanny. Around the 170 chapter mark, I quickly did some math and found that if I were to upload a chapter with at least ten thousand words every other day, I would be able to meet the deadline of lining up the 200th chapter breaking the 2 million word mark on the second anniversary of this story. And this weekend, I will be driving back up to my university with my family to graduate; the following weeks afterwards, I will help my folks move out of the place we'd lived in for eleven and a half years to a proper home, something my folks had always dreamed of owning. Perhaps this is symbolic, and if it is, I guess I wouldn't have it any other way.
I've seen many other Kantai fanfic stories rise and fall over the months - one of them being my own. I've seen the detractors raise their pitchforks and light their torches as they rise up from the depths of the mysterious dark ocean we call the Internet in self-righteous fury at the unforgivable flaws of my work, because truth be told, they very well may be right. Both A:AFS and A
M4 started out as stories whose plots I came up with in less than a handful of minutes, stories that were started on mere whims. And because of their ugly duckling geneses, I realize that my stories have some glaring problems with them, biased or not, as others have courteously (or not so courteously) pointed out to me; not to mention the fact that all my life, I have been a strong proponent of maintaining a balance of friends and enemies to prevent the deterioration of the mind and spirit. But this being said, it seems to me that recently, my name and my work have managed to gain a level of infamy I myself never saw coming. Now is a time for me to say now and forever, that never once have I claimed to be a competent author. Never once did I have plans to turn any of my stories into the greatest pieces of fanfiction ever. It just so happened one day that I thought to myself, "hey, I've got an interesting idea, let me write it down", and a two million word story sprung up from there two years down the line, and this isn't even me trying to demonstrate a kind of passive-aggressive humility. It just so happened that I decided to keep writing because I kept getting more and more ideas that I felt would be fun to write, and along the way, slowly but surely, more and more people began to take notice and were kind enough to grant me their attention and readership. It has always been, and will always remain, a solitary journey for me, a sort of...let me say, "personal travel", a test of dedication to see just how far my mind can take a single story; think a journey of a thousand miles, except in a literary sense. Whether I gain fame or notoriety because of the work and time I put into building these stories of mine is only relevant to the point of my recognition of it, and no more.But regardless, whatever happens, you can be sure that come another year from now, I will still be writing, and you will still see A:AFS and others at the top of the Kantai page at the beginning of the day for your reading pleasure...or displeasure, should you so choose to accept it.
Thank you very much to everyone who has reviewed, favorited, followed, and shared both my name and my stories. Even to my detractors whose names I may not remember or know (or care to know) but whose comments I remember extremely well, I must extend my thanks - it wouldn't be a journey if there was no opposition, to fuel me to prove you wrong, that indeed, a single insane mind with too much time on his hands can still write a crazy story that's worth at least some people's time, if not yours. Because they can keep typing away in their forum threads and Skype chats about how bad my stories are, like some kind of secret Discord tech.
And that's okay. They can keep their blessings, for I was never welcome.
-Paul, a.k.a. Akyuu no Joshu
M4is about.I feel like this vitriol was aimed at this thread. And everything else.
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CompassJimbo
Where’s Your North?
- Location
- The former Rubber Capital of the World
He may have caught wind of the dramatic reading of Ambience: Platoon. Oh, dear god…
- Location
- ⇙
Has he ever actually played KanColle? Because in this AN he says he wanted to, but it doesn't mention if he succeeded.
I also like how : P was turned into a smiley. Makes the whole AN seem like some good natured tongue-in-cheek ribbing.
I also like how : P was turned into a smiley. Makes the whole AN seem like some good natured tongue-in-cheek ribbing.
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Let's read: the A/N of Ambiance #200
De3ta
Mae
- Location
- The hellish pit known as New Jersey
SPECIAL LET'S READ CHAPTER!
------------------------------------------------------
The A/N to Chapter 200.
It already was.
Jesus H Christ getting impaled on a molten pike staff the ENTER key is your friend!
To Tl;dr this for everyone, He got on the Kantai Collection hype-train (*Cough* BULLSHIT) and made the synopsis for this fic. He then goes on about his college dorm, how he was waiting for his dad to pick him up, and generally proving that he explains the unnecessary for no reason in his actual descriptions of life. We don't give a fuck about your laptop or your shitty keyboard, what's the point of this.
Also, he started this fic....because he had time to kill getting a Proxy st up to play the game. You needed to do this shit to play it until about a year ago.......F**K YOU DMM!
"Skeleton of a plot" indeed.
He says yet gets very defensive when confronted for any issues in the fic, and stopped posting it on SV because it wasn't the only KC game in town and he wasn't getting his ego sucked by every poor schmuck who just wanted to have more Kancolle in their life because it was something they enjoyed.
Guilty as motherfuckin charged. Ending the second chapter with Infanticide didn't exactly endear anyone to your story either.
Also for the sake of our mental state, just take a swig of the nearest beverage you have on hand every time you see a *Ding*, it's how I'm getting through this.
To answer these in order: Barely, I don't know you tell me, and because in the Summer of 2014 I don't think there were any other fics to read like this. Despite how awful it is, it's still technically what looks to be a longer narrative fic than the one-shot romances or unconnected fluff fics that would have been, and for the most part still are, what makes up the very small section that Fanficton.net has for this Franchise.
Hell it could barely be called a franchise at the time! Just a relatively obscure Japanese browser game about cute boats doing cute things and fighting weird sea monsters. But it caught on, and it caught on quick. This isn't the exact purpose of this let's read so i'll not go into explicit detail, I don't know much about the earlier days of Kancolle's popularity to analyse it here, but it quickly grew due to people loving the characters that were shown in the small snippets we get in game. If Kancolle was just a collectible card browser game where for the most part RNG i'd not be playing this god awful salt generating garbage, i'd go play fucking hearthstone!
Which brings me to why this fic, the whole thing, falls so flat. It's not the edge or the actual problems with the structure and exposition, those are bad mind, it's what he's done to the characters we all know and love.
Murakumo is the only example i can go into at the moment, but I feel it speaks for itself. She get's brainwashed into this guy's slave via a knife to the head, and has to watch him shoot an infant in the face, all in the first hour or so of her being activated in this fic. That is what makes this just that much more painful to read, I actually care. If it was just a shitty Edgey Fallout fan fic, i'f still be insulted as a fan of Post-apocalyptic fiction, but until he reached some location that exists in the games it'd just be that, an Insult.
This Fanfiction both insults me intellectually, and personally, and I've dedicated myself to read every single word within. Not because I enjoy this, but because I need to. I need closure for the shit I've seen so far. It won't be good, it won't make me happy at how it ends, but It'll be over and done with.
.....god damn was that a long one, and we still have A/N left to go!
This is also true-is he reading the thread when I'm not looking??
He apparently stayed with a host family in Japan, good for him I guess, and had been writing this for a year by now. Including the spin-off more "Accurate" to the games Ambiance: Platoon.
We'll get to that later, it was what I'd intended to read before I started this by mistake.
Not gonna happen, we've got more, better, fics too fill whatever sic void you filled.
Never been a better argument for Quality over quantity.
This explains so god damn much.......
OH REALLY?!?!? I"D HAVE NEVER GUESSED!!
This, kids, is how one makes people driven to drink.
Eat every single mother fucking-
-MAGMA CLAD MALNOURISHED COCKS-
-IN THE DEEPEST PITS OF HELL.
Happy Mothers day everyone!
------------------------------------------------------
The A/N to Chapter 200.
It already was.
Jesus H Christ getting impaled on a molten pike staff the ENTER key is your friend!
To Tl;dr this for everyone, He got on the Kantai Collection hype-train (*Cough* BULLSHIT) and made the synopsis for this fic. He then goes on about his college dorm, how he was waiting for his dad to pick him up, and generally proving that he explains the unnecessary for no reason in his actual descriptions of life. We don't give a fuck about your laptop or your shitty keyboard, what's the point of this.
Also, he started this fic....because he had time to kill getting a Proxy st up to play the game. You needed to do this shit to play it until about a year ago.......F**K YOU DMM!
"Skeleton of a plot" indeed.
He says yet gets very defensive when confronted for any issues in the fic, and stopped posting it on SV because it wasn't the only KC game in town and he wasn't getting his ego sucked by every poor schmuck who just wanted to have more Kancolle in their life because it was something they enjoyed.
Guilty as motherfuckin charged. Ending the second chapter with Infanticide didn't exactly endear anyone to your story either.
Also for the sake of our mental state, just take a swig of the nearest beverage you have on hand every time you see a *Ding*, it's how I'm getting through this.
To answer these in order: Barely, I don't know you tell me, and because in the Summer of 2014 I don't think there were any other fics to read like this. Despite how awful it is, it's still technically what looks to be a longer narrative fic than the one-shot romances or unconnected fluff fics that would have been, and for the most part still are, what makes up the very small section that Fanficton.net has for this Franchise.
Hell it could barely be called a franchise at the time! Just a relatively obscure Japanese browser game about cute boats doing cute things and fighting weird sea monsters. But it caught on, and it caught on quick. This isn't the exact purpose of this let's read so i'll not go into explicit detail, I don't know much about the earlier days of Kancolle's popularity to analyse it here, but it quickly grew due to people loving the characters that were shown in the small snippets we get in game. If Kancolle was just a collectible card browser game where for the most part RNG i'd not be playing this god awful salt generating garbage, i'd go play fucking hearthstone!
Which brings me to why this fic, the whole thing, falls so flat. It's not the edge or the actual problems with the structure and exposition, those are bad mind, it's what he's done to the characters we all know and love.
Murakumo is the only example i can go into at the moment, but I feel it speaks for itself. She get's brainwashed into this guy's slave via a knife to the head, and has to watch him shoot an infant in the face, all in the first hour or so of her being activated in this fic. That is what makes this just that much more painful to read, I actually care. If it was just a shitty Edgey Fallout fan fic, i'f still be insulted as a fan of Post-apocalyptic fiction, but until he reached some location that exists in the games it'd just be that, an Insult.
This Fanfiction both insults me intellectually, and personally, and I've dedicated myself to read every single word within. Not because I enjoy this, but because I need to. I need closure for the shit I've seen so far. It won't be good, it won't make me happy at how it ends, but It'll be over and done with.
.....god damn was that a long one, and we still have A/N left to go!
This is also true-is he reading the thread when I'm not looking??
On May 8, 2015, during my semester abroad in Hirakata City, Osaka Prefecture, I was sitting in my room in my host family's home with the same laptop with the crappy chiclet keyboard, sitting in my room in my host family's house. The Kantai Collection anime that aired earlier that year gave the Kantai fanfiction page a good boost of attention, and more people started seeing my stories. Many of you first heard of or started reading around this time, and some of you are now among my most frequent reviewers. The start of 2015 was when I decided to forget about all of the stories I had written up to that point and invest all my energy and time into developing the two Kantai Collection fanfictions that I had under my belt at the time: A:AFS, and the one that is somehow still widely read to this day, Ambience: Platoon | Moebius Four, because by this time, I had developed plans and a much more in-depth plot for A:AFS, and I had ideas in the works for A
He apparently stayed with a host family in Japan, good for him I guess, and had been writing this for a year by now. Including the spin-off more "Accurate" to the games Ambiance: Platoon.
We'll get to that later, it was what I'd intended to read before I started this by mistake.
Not gonna happen, we've got more, better, fics too fill whatever sic void you filled.
Never been a better argument for Quality over quantity.
. Both A:AFS and A
This explains so god damn much.......
OH REALLY?!?!? I"D HAVE NEVER GUESSED!!
This, kids, is how one makes people driven to drink.
Eat every single mother fucking-
-MAGMA CLAD MALNOURISHED COCKS-
-IN THE DEEPEST PITS OF HELL.
Happy Mothers day everyone!
Last edited:
Whiskey Golf
Being of Editing & Technical Assistance
- Location
- Chained to my desk
Eh, if he had half a brain and let go of that pitbull pride of his and was actually teachable, he would be welcome. My first fanfic efforts were pretty shitty and too many derps in trying to be cool (no goddamnit if you have done this shit before you fucking kit up before you go into combat, not after you are engaged goddamnit 15 year old Whiskey you derp come over here so I can punch you).
Now I'm the beta for GG, the face of the Committee for the Restoration of the Greatest Generation and I accidentally ended up as a co-author on Eternity, lol. It's all about being willing to learn and do your research.
Now I'm the beta for GG, the face of the Committee for the Restoration of the Greatest Generation and I accidentally ended up as a co-author on Eternity, lol.
It's all about being willing to learn and do your research.
De3ta
Mae
- Location
- The hellish pit known as New Jersey
Eh, if he had half a brain and let go of that pitbull pride of his and was actually teachable, he would be welcome. My first fanfic efforts were pretty shitty and too many derps in trying to be cool (no goddamnit if you have done this shit before you fucking kit up before you go into combat, not after you are engaged goddamnit 15 year old Whiskey you derp come over here so I can punch you).
Now I'm the beta for GG, the face of the Committee for the Restoration of the Greatest Generation and I accidentally ended up as a co-author on Eternity, lol.
Oh I know that faar too well, I'm just now getting into writing writing again now that I feel I'm...legible to the common man, and I'm still worried it'll be shitty.
This is the difference between the way we write things.
He doesn't take criticism, he acknowledges it, be it doesn't take. Maybe it's pride, I've no idea, but he never listens.
I however, and always worried that what I'm doing could be better, or has a fatal flaw i it that could be mended. When I share my writings and I'm not told anything is bad or needs improvement, I get confused. A part off me thinks "Wait, so there's nothing at all you wanna say? It's good and that's all? Come ooon, I know that ain't true! where did I fuck it up?
De3ta
Mae
- Location
- The hellish pit known as New Jersey
*1:36*
*Giggles*
......I am suprised no one noticed this, because I did and it's hilarious. *Looks @Aires Drake *
*Blinks.*
What? I noticed it.
Anyway, flaw with your writing @De3ta : You have a tendency to not capitalize 'I's, especially when they're in a contraction. Also, if you're writing out something in all caps, just hit the capslock key. That'll save you from moments like this:
Skywalker_T-65
Writer with too many ideas.
- Location
- United States
- Pronouns
- Plural/They/He/Her
You see.
All, and I mean all that A/N tells me is that he'll never improve. If I found out someone was eviscerating my stories, my first instinct would be 'what the hell? Did I do something wrong?' Because, clearly, if something is bad enough in one of them to justify people being this angry/annoyed/WTFing about it, I need to fix it. Then, though, this is probably the difference between me (and most authors) and him. I've been doing this for coming up on seven years now, counting my first no-longer-on-the-internet fic. And that entire time, I've been steadily improving because I like critique, and it shows me where to improve.
This guy? He wouldn't know critique if it bit him in the behind. Because anything negative at all is 'someone out to get the story' or something. And because he's got the loyal fanbase stroking the ego, which is also the only reason the thing is still going and going and going and going and going...
*ahem*
Anyway. Clearly, if he thinks his fic will stay at the top of the KC archive for another damn year, I need to get around to finishing porting Indy over for some good KC on FF.N. Or so I like to think anyway.
All, and I mean all that A/N tells me is that he'll never improve. If I found out someone was eviscerating my stories, my first instinct would be 'what the hell? Did I do something wrong?' Because, clearly, if something is bad enough in one of them to justify people being this angry/annoyed/WTFing about it, I need to fix it. Then, though, this is probably the difference between me (and most authors) and him. I've been doing this for coming up on seven years now, counting my first no-longer-on-the-internet fic. And that entire time, I've been steadily improving because I like critique, and it shows me where to improve.
This guy? He wouldn't know critique if it bit him in the behind. Because anything negative at all is 'someone out to get the story' or something. And because he's got the loyal fanbase stroking the ego, which is also the only reason the thing is still going and going and going and going and going...
*ahem*
Anyway. Clearly, if he thinks his fic will stay at the top of the KC archive for another damn year, I need to get around to finishing porting Indy over for some good KC on FF.N. Or so I like to think anyway.
Start on text file, copy pasta into thread after?
Twei
I have a face!
- Location
- the land where they write things
- Pronouns
- They/Them
Belated Battleships is pretty damn amazing right now, and despite being mistitled it's doing alright on FF.net.
Chapter three: In which many things are explained! (Badly)
De3ta
Mae
- Location
- The hellish pit known as New Jersey
Well let's try this again.....once again......*Cries*
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 3: A Sense of Purpose
We begin the chapter with their airport search bearing no fruit, and after commandeering an abandoned truck from the looters ,God I hope it's not the same one that ended chapter two, and being their journey east.
On the road Murakmo's stomach growls, and we get introduced to the stupid, stupid way that Crazy Steve (The Author, because fuuuck typing out his user name) tries to incorporate the game mechanics.
In Kancolle you have four resources, Fuel, Ammo, Steel, and bauxite. Each of these are needed to send your girls out on a sortie. Fuel and Ammo are self explanatory, steel is used mainly in construction and repairing the ships, bauxite is a fancy name for aluminum, it make sense in the context of the game.
Then you have how this story tries to explain it, Shipgirls as a concept just does not work the way presented here. As a man made thing the only explanation that could be bullshit out for it would be closer to magic than anything else, and so there needs to be that certain mystical edge to their existence. I'm not saying it has to be this way, or that it cannot be explained in another fashion, bu with the way Akyuu is trying to fail at it by raising far too many questions for it's own good.
Doesn't help when he's asking those very same questions.
Then of course there's the question I though of myself. What powers you then? Are you some sort of Lab-created Cyborg or are you androids? How do these things increase your performance? You can eat human food and get hungry, so does that mean you are a cyborg? Do you use the food you eat to be turned into fuel? I'd ask how the helll that works but I really don't, I only ask that because so much of it doesn't make sense I've reached the point of asking that.
Any who: Fuel makes them faster, Ammo is ammunition, Steel allows them to heal from wounds by patching themselves with it. (how does that work? do you grow the flesh over the metal parts or will you eventually be covered in metal until you have to get more of it? Do-I'll stop or I'm gonna be here all day.)
Bauxite for some reason makes them more durable? it's just Aluminum, in game it only matters if you have planes so no idea where that came from.
CUT TO: The outskirts off Houston, where they've made camp for the night. Outside the secure truck safe from the elements.....okaaaaaay.
*Tenses Up*.....Come on man, this is the same world that has Bullshit radiation cleaning tech, this fight isn't worth it......
...PICK YOUR BATTLES......
*Exhales* At least he's consistent in this nonsense.
They go on about the difference in quality with canned and non-canned food before dropping the mother of all stupid (For the next paragraph at least) right into our laps.
He is a 17 year old boy with blue hair and super powers.......Nothing new learned, just that I was astounded by the concentration of awful fanfic things. *Ding*
THE WARSHIP MEANT TO SUPPORT MODERN NAVAL VESSELS DOESN'T KNOW WHAT NUKES ARE........Okay.
Murderhobo then goes out to describe what nukes are, which the Hackyuu didn't need to include unless he thinks his readers are morons. I'll say nothing on that other than I am reading this, which should direct you to my answer. YES THEY ARE.
They get to talking some more about the end of the world, Damon is part of "Generation Zero," born after the bombs dropped, and HIS PARENTS ARE DEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!
He whines about how he doesn't need to whine because they died when he was very young, and if this fic wasn't a steaming pile off bilge I might be asked to give a damn.
Okay that explains the super soldier bullshit, but why the blue hair? Does he dye that shit every once in awhile or is that just natural? I'm not sure which answer I would hate more.
He then must explain that drinking irradiated standing water is a bad idea to Murakumo, who I know he thinks is an idiot, aftet that we get my favorite exchange in this fic thus far.
YES.
Not a high bar to surpass.
Well, apparently Damon as a wannabe Hackerman (A Kung Fury reference that lost me the update, google him yourself it's hilarious.) that worked for the US government, huh so they are still around. Still don't know what the hell CCPL means.
*Sigh* Ignoring the fact he built the fucking thing what the hell-*Inhale*....In a game like Titanfall, as mentioned by @PotatoesOfDoom , makes sense due to gameplay reasons. I never played Titanfall enough to tell you how exactly, but I assume it involves hacking the Mecha used in the game. In a narrative, that I no longer think of as trying for realism outside what contributes to the edgy girmderp of the fic, it's still trying to be relatively modern or at least seems to be at this point.
Now odds are as more Shipgirls arrive things will slowly hover away from this faux-20-minutes-into-the-future but with nuke that this setting is so far (Until needed for DRAMA) this makes no fucking sense. You aren't Hideo Freaking Kojima, Nano-machines won't cut it to explain your nonsensical plot device of "Oh my knife can hack the Shipgirls so the actually join my side," shit.
You haven't earned any kind of leeway with this story so far, I don't give a fuck about what narrative you have with the most concrete goal set being "Gather anarmy Navy of slaves made up of characters that I like and get....something, revenge I guess,"
One good thing about this chapter, he is bothering to explain quite a bit! All of it terrible!
This fucking guy has never seen a cigarette in his life. they don't burn fucking yellow!
.......Murakumo, take it away.
MOVING ON-
-.....not taking the bait MOVING ON-
-FUCK YOU I'M GETTING TO THE END OF THIS CHAPTER-
Question of the day! What the hell is he even doing this for?
.......*Wracked with sobs*...MURAKUMOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, TAKE IT AWAY.....
H-He wants an army of Shipgirls.....so he can take over the world........
Then why did you let the scientist go?
BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
And the last too seem to be going along pretty fucking well on their own! Ya know the things you decried as stupid in the FIRST FUCKING CHAPTER.
Unnecessary gun talk. *Ding*
HE IS A SHITTY METAL GEAR VILLAIN WANNABE TO BOOT! BRILLIANT!
Murakumo you are too good for this piece of shit.
Random gun porn again. *Ding*
AND THAT'S BASICALLY CHAPTER 3!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 3: A Sense of Purpose
We begin the chapter with their airport search bearing no fruit, and after commandeering an abandoned truck from the looters ,God I hope it's not the same one that ended chapter two, and being their journey east.
On the road Murakmo's stomach growls, and we get introduced to the stupid, stupid way that Crazy Steve (The Author, because fuuuck typing out his user name) tries to incorporate the game mechanics.
In Kancolle you have four resources, Fuel, Ammo, Steel, and bauxite. Each of these are needed to send your girls out on a sortie. Fuel and Ammo are self explanatory, steel is used mainly in construction and repairing the ships, bauxite is a fancy name for aluminum, it make sense in the context of the game.
Then you have how this story tries to explain it, Shipgirls as a concept just does not work the way presented here. As a man made thing the only explanation that could be bullshit out for it would be closer to magic than anything else, and so there needs to be that certain mystical edge to their existence. I'm not saying it has to be this way, or that it cannot be explained in another fashion, bu with the way Akyuu is trying to fail at it by raising far too many questions for it's own good.
Doesn't help when he's asking those very same questions.
Then of course there's the question I though of myself. What powers you then? Are you some sort of Lab-created Cyborg or are you androids? How do these things increase your performance? You can eat human food and get hungry, so does that mean you are a cyborg? Do you use the food you eat to be turned into fuel? I'd ask how the helll that works but I really don't, I only ask that because so much of it doesn't make sense I've reached the point of asking that.
Any who: Fuel makes them faster, Ammo is ammunition, Steel allows them to heal from wounds by patching themselves with it. (how does that work? do you grow the flesh over the metal parts or will you eventually be covered in metal until you have to get more of it? Do-I'll stop or I'm gonna be here all day.)
Bauxite for some reason makes them more durable? it's just Aluminum, in game it only matters if you have planes so no idea where that came from.
CUT TO: The outskirts off Houston, where they've made camp for the night. Outside the secure truck safe from the elements.....okaaaaaay.
*Tenses Up*.....Come on man, this is the same world that has Bullshit radiation cleaning tech, this fight isn't worth it......
...PICK YOUR BATTLES......
*Exhales* At least he's consistent in this nonsense.
They go on about the difference in quality with canned and non-canned food before dropping the mother of all stupid (For the next paragraph at least) right into our laps.
He is a 17 year old boy with blue hair and super powers.......Nothing new learned, just that I was astounded by the concentration of awful fanfic things. *Ding*
THE WARSHIP MEANT TO SUPPORT MODERN NAVAL VESSELS DOESN'T KNOW WHAT NUKES ARE........Okay.
Murderhobo then goes out to describe what nukes are, which the Hackyuu didn't need to include unless he thinks his readers are morons. I'll say nothing on that other than I am reading this, which should direct you to my answer. YES THEY ARE.
They get to talking some more about the end of the world, Damon is part of "Generation Zero," born after the bombs dropped, and HIS PARENTS ARE DEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!
He whines about how he doesn't need to whine because they died when he was very young, and if this fic wasn't a steaming pile off bilge I might be asked to give a damn.
Okay that explains the super soldier bullshit, but why the blue hair? Does he dye that shit every once in awhile or is that just natural? I'm not sure which answer I would hate more.
He then must explain that drinking irradiated standing water is a bad idea to Murakumo, who I know he thinks is an idiot, aftet that we get my favorite exchange in this fic thus far.
YES.
Not a high bar to surpass.
Well, apparently Damon as a wannabe Hackerman (A Kung Fury reference that lost me the update, google him yourself it's hilarious.) that worked for the US government, huh so they are still around. Still don't know what the hell CCPL means.
*Sigh* Ignoring the fact he built the fucking thing what the hell-*Inhale*....In a game like Titanfall, as mentioned by @PotatoesOfDoom , makes sense due to gameplay reasons. I never played Titanfall enough to tell you how exactly, but I assume it involves hacking the Mecha used in the game. In a narrative, that I no longer think of as trying for realism outside what contributes to the edgy girmderp of the fic, it's still trying to be relatively modern or at least seems to be at this point.
Now odds are as more Shipgirls arrive things will slowly hover away from this faux-20-minutes-into-the-future but with nuke that this setting is so far (Until needed for DRAMA) this makes no fucking sense. You aren't Hideo Freaking Kojima, Nano-machines won't cut it to explain your nonsensical plot device of "Oh my knife can hack the Shipgirls so the actually join my side," shit.
You haven't earned any kind of leeway with this story so far, I don't give a fuck about what narrative you have with the most concrete goal set being "Gather an
One good thing about this chapter, he is bothering to explain quite a bit! All of it terrible!
This fucking guy has never seen a cigarette in his life. they don't burn fucking yellow!
.......Murakumo, take it away.
MOVING ON-
-.....not taking the bait MOVING ON-
-FUCK YOU I'M GETTING TO THE END OF THIS CHAPTER-
Question of the day! What the hell is he even doing this for?
.......*Wracked with sobs*...MURAKUMOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, TAKE IT AWAY.....
H-He wants an army of Shipgirls.....so he can take over the world........
Then why did you let the scientist go?
BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
And the last too seem to be going along pretty fucking well on their own! Ya know the things you decried as stupid in the FIRST FUCKING CHAPTER.
Unnecessary gun talk. *Ding*
HE IS A SHITTY METAL GEAR VILLAIN WANNABE TO BOOT! BRILLIANT!
Murakumo you are too good for this piece of shit.
Random gun porn again. *Ding*
AND THAT'S BASICALLY CHAPTER 3!
CV12Hornet
Riter.
- Location
- Tacoma, Washington
... Wow. Just... wow. I thought he didn't care about the rest of the planet?
De3ta
Mae
- Location
- The hellish pit known as New Jersey
He's that kind of shitty Protagonist.
"Uh the world is such a dark and evil place, It can go to hell"
THEN
"I wanna save the dank and depression world!"
Even tough said world is saving itself, and your own personal army of Android slaves will only makes things worse.
Skywalker_T-65
Writer with too many ideas.
- Location
- United States
- Pronouns
- Plural/They/He/Her
...yeah, I was going to say. South America, Africa, most of Asia...
Yeah, screw those guys right? They're perfectly fine on their own, somehow.
Yeah, screw those guys right? They're perfectly fine on their own, somehow.
- Location
- ⇙
Why the actual fuck is Murakumo already acting all blushy and dere dere to the creep that enslaved her just a short while ago. I guess the knife also damaged her brain.
But yeah If the UN is already cleaning whole continents from radiation I don't really see what our protagonist is going to do to help. They seem to have things under control. I guess that will be retconned later on and all the radiation free places are criminal hellholes.
But yeah If the UN is already cleaning whole continents from radiation I don't really see what our protagonist is going to do to help. They seem to have things under control. I guess that will be retconned later on and all the radiation free places are criminal hellholes.
InfiniteDaze
Too lazy to leave the house
- Location
- I wish I could stay
...That knife works how?
And I'm starting to think the author is writing this fic at gun point and Murakumo represents everything he has to say about this peice of shit.
...De3ta, De3ta I don't think I can continue.
And I'm starting to think the author is writing this fic at gun point and Murakumo represents everything he has to say about this peice of shit.
...De3ta, De3ta I don't think I can continue.
Give thanks unto @De3ta for he suffers for you!
Actually, if she really is Japanese Destroyer Murakumo (1928) in some way that would make perfect sense, since she was sunk early in the war.
It probably makes significantly less sense with whatever she is here.
Twei
I have a face!
- Location
- the land where they write things
- Pronouns
- They/Them
... Is that like Citizens United? Is he going to start paying 'TOTALLY UNAFFILIATED PEOPLE" to write hit pieces?
