CV12Hornet
Riter.
- Location
- Tacoma, Washington
Nasuverse. Specifically, Kara no Kyokai.
CV12Hornet Cleans Out His Fanfiction Favorites List (Beware of Shit Taste)
- Thread starter CV12Hornet
- Start date
- Location
- oregon, usa
- Pronouns
- He/Him
That is actually a pretty clever combination of settings. Shame it doesn't work out.
Rogue Gemini
Wanderer without a Twin
- Location
- Here
Yeah, there are few exceptions where the Nasuverse can work with other settings, but this is not one of them.
My feelings on KnK is that it works best as mystery stories when working cohesively with other series. Powers that aren't the primary focus, with it more on character interactions and motivations. I kinda get why using MEoDP as a doujutsu, but the complexity and conceptual aspects is what unhinges the whole thing.
My feelings on KnK is that it works best as mystery stories when working cohesively with other series. Powers that aren't the primary focus, with it more on character interactions and motivations. I kinda get why using MEoDP as a doujutsu, but the complexity and conceptual aspects is what unhinges the whole thing.
- Location
- Caracas
... boy what a way to shit on everything.
KnK is very... particular given Shiki's... particularities, uniqueness.
Aka she being the host of the personality of the goal of every magi. Akasha.
tarrangar
Fat arctic chicken
What you really need is a hypnosis based hero, forcing the Worms out of Sakura is very hard to do, but for all Zoukens monstrosity, he is still only high level modern mage powerful, anyone with a Noble Phantasm that can control people, can simply order him to remove the worms, and from there it's just a matter of killing him.
Most Casters should be able to do it, because even if hypnosis isn't their specialty, they have heroic spirit level magical ability, they should be able to overcome Zouken's magic resistance with a normal hypnosis spell.
Basically to defeat Zouken, you just have to remember that while killing the Worms in Sakura is near impossible, forcing him to take them out is much less so.
If you are willing to take a risk, you can also do it, by having both his body and Sakura in the same room, and having a Servant not powered by Sakura tell him that if he don't remove the worms they will kill both him and Sakura, and then hunt down any Worms he might have hidden away, to do this you either need a better pokerface than Zouken, or you need to be accept Sakura might die, but Zouken should give up in such a situation, so long as you can convince him that you believe that him and Sakura dying, is a better outcome than him living and Sakura still being enslaved.
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A New Order
CV12Hornet
Riter.
- Location
- Tacoma, Washington
Impressions before reading:
While a sound idea, I distinctly remember said Outer Senshi, Uranus, getting hit with The Worf Effect a lot.
Review:
Wow. This is intensely boring. In the second chapter, that's down to a massive exposition dump. Pro tip of the day: there are ways to make exposition dumps, especially dialogue-based ones, interesting or at least tolerable, but a basic, 2000-word back-and-forth conversation is not one of them.
No, while I get why the second chapter is so boring, the first chapter has no such explanation. It's just... boring. Intensely boring. I'm not sure why.
Verdict:
- Location
- Caracas
Said hero still needs to somehow stablish a direct link with Zouken's physical body in order to start the whole hypnosis, his physical body is a worm attached to Sakura's heart. So making it fairly hard to do any hypnosis thing when the target is inside someone's body and the "body" that we see can be easily dissolved.
I think this is about to get off topic, so if you want to continue the debate we can do it on the type moon thread.
March 3 - 10, 2013
CV12Hornet
Riter.
- Location
- Tacoma, Washington
Impressions before reading:
Mostly, this is just a metaphysics exploration, albeit an interesting one.
Review:
This actually kinda sort predicts a twist from the last arc of Bleach: namely, that Ichigo's inner hollow is actually his zanpakuto spirit, and that what we thought was his zanpakuto spirit was actually a manifestation of his Quincy abilities. It's a stupid twist, IMO, but this one has more justification as a side-effect of Rukia giving all her power to Ichigo way back in the start of the series. Considering she just... recharged or something in between the Soul Society and Arrancar arcs, having there be a gaping void where her original zanpakuto spirit was makes some sort of sense.
On the other hand, it's perhaps a little too beneficial for a side effect that was supposed to be what got giving your shinigami powers to a human a capital punishment in the first place. Hell, it's arguably just a way to give Rukia a powerup. But eh, the setup and metaphysics behind it are sufficiently well-done that I can't complain too much.
Verdict: Yeah, I'll keep it.
Impressions before reading:
Keep an eye on that author name. He'll be coming up again in the future.
Anyway, this is one of the few fics that doesn't have Ichigo do the classic shonen protagonist tactic of "charge in screaming". That'll probably be worth the price of admission on its own.
Review:
I like the concept of this, even if it's using the aforementioned twist about Ichigo's abilities. Events proceed logically from Ichigo gaining Sode no Shirayuki, and more importantly, Byakuya and Renji seeing him use her.
The problem is, the fic uses a truly obnoxious amount of passive voice. You can tell this is one of Sky's earlier stories. And my tolerance for passive voice has declined dramatically since starting this project.
Verdict:
Impressions before reading:
Ah, Girl Genius. One of my favorite webcomics of all time1, a world where Mad Scientists rule the world. Badly. The worldbuilding is lush, deep, and logical; the characters fascinating and not cliches in the slightest2, and the plot is complex enough to rival One Piece, even if it has a tendency to drag on at points through the means of throwing unforeseen obstacles at Agatha.
Anyway, fanfiction I've seen falls into two camps: AUs, and crossovers. The former I mostly see on AO3; the latter mostly on Spacebattles, and all by one guy. But we'll get to him eventually.
Review:
Sometimes my stubborn determination to finish a thing works out. This is one of those times.
Agatha Emiya and the Fifth Holy Grail War starts off on shaky footing. The technical errors are rife and annoying, though at least the problems are confined there. The basic idea here is that Agatha somehow ended up in Fuyuki as a child, probably shortly after she got her Spark3-suppressing locket; why her Spark is active, if far less active than in canon, is not explained, though it's suggested the functions of the locket have switched over to suppressing her memories of Girl Genius Earth. But that doesn't explain where the locket went. Or how Lucrezia got here. Or why the Jaegers4 have been hanging around long enough to get known by the Einzberns.
But who cares! It's clearly supposed to be a slow-burn mystery of some kind, and it's kind of secondary to the Holy Grail War action. And even that is arguably secondary to Agatha going full SCIENCE! on Nasuverse magic. It's a glorious sight to see, and it helps that Rin ends up stealing some of the concepts behind Agatha's studies. Also, the fact that she's dived into the Madness Place so many times that Sakura has a protocol for handling her is deeply amusing.
Verdict: It stays, and I hope for a new chapter soon.
- Helps that it's a small team instead of one dude at his computer doing the work and that Phil and Kaja Foglio are professional comic artists.
- Like protagonist Agatha Heterodyne, who is very much one of the good guys but also has a vindictive streak a mile wide.
- The Spark is the condition that causes Mad Scientist in the Girl Genius verse. It's genius and mania all in one package, and sufferers of it are known as Sparks.
- Super-soldiers made by Agatha's family, the Heterodynes. Tough, vicious, and extremely loyal.
Skywalker_T-65
Writer with too many ideas.
- Location
- United States
- Pronouns
- Plural/They/He/Her
Ah well, it is five six years since I started that. At least there's the rewrite.
...I need to crosspost that, one of these days.
Mind you, I liked the Hollow-is-Zangetsu twist. The Quincy thing is more questionable, but the Hollow at least fits with all his protestations of being Zangetsu. That's me though.
...I need to crosspost that, one of these days.
Mind you, I liked the Hollow-is-Zangetsu twist. The Quincy thing is more questionable, but the Hollow at least fits with all his protestations of being Zangetsu. That's me though.
- Location
- Caracas
Truly this fic is good civ.
March 22 - 30, 2013
CV12Hornet
Riter.
- Location
- Tacoma, Washington
Impressions before reading:
By the same man as Nin Tech, we have a Dresden Files/Sailor Moon crossover with Harry Dresden raising Sailor Jupiter.
Poor Jupiter.
Review:
This story is basically a classic short Dresden romp, except crossed over with Sailor Moon, and even then Makoto Kino is the only sign of anything from the Sailor Moon side. And it's actually a pretty good Dresden romp, with a murder mystery and mystical nasties galore! Gremlins, in this case, and an utter moron smuggling them by plane with substandard tranquilizers. About the only problem I had were some timeline stuff that doesn't add up, namely Toot-Toot being a thing despite the fic clearly being set shortly after the first book.
As for the larger Senshi Files series, this is mostly just setup. We'll get to that in Silver Warden.
Verdict: Keep, for now.
Impressions before reading:
Remember how, way back when I made my review for Hell is a Martial Artist, I mentioned a certain fic that doesn't take Ranma's side in the entire fiancee debacle? Yeah, this is it. Expect pathetic laughter and lesbianism.
Review:
So, I've made it clear that this is a reversal of the usual fanfiction dynamic regarding Ranma. Here, he's not the one whose problems have to be solved; here, he's the problem. And what makes this work, besides the fact that it's a novel premise, is that it uses Ranma's own traits against him here. His lack of social skills and ego - especially his ego - conspire to throw everything into chaos. And his tendency to just go with the flow and react is what leaves him so flatfooted in the first place. And then his ego proceeds to scupper any real chance of him just accepting the new situation.
Which is a nice segue into the real strength of this fic: humor. Ranma's attempts to try and woo back the fiancee trio, aided by Mousse, are hilarious in their failure. Partly because they're invariably over-the-top. And the narration just has some hilarious turns of phrase.
The weaknesses are that the fic veers into accusation fic territory at times; it only barely avoids that sticker, in my mind, by being more charitable towards certain members of the cast like Ryouga and Cologne who are shown handling the new situation with entirely more dignity than the rest of Nerima; the lesbianism might not work for everybody; and that one hole-in-the-wall restaurant Akane takes Ukyo to leads to a decidedly cringy scene.
Verdict: On the balance, though, I like this a lot more than I don't.
Impressions before reading:
Modern anime's quintessential bad anime. From watching a lot of Anime Abandon, the current anime-watching generation is pretty spoiled in that regard. Regardless, don't expect much fanfic for this show here.
The Familiar of Zero side, though, it gives me something to talk about, namely my favorite genre of Familiar of Zero crossover fic: the reverse summon! It's exactly what it says on the tin, where Louise, instead of summoning a familiar, reverses the spell and ends up in another world. These tend to be much more expansive in Louise's character development and in terms of plot, mostly because it's not shackled to Familiar of Zero's low-tier ass.
Review:
In standard Racke fashion, this fic is rather light on details. This time, I think that's to the fic's benefit; Sword Art Online has many problems, one of which is apparently a lot of storytelling fat that could be cut, particularly in terms of the characters, and the whole thing is just not terribly well developed in terms of stakes. So instead of Sword Art Online's death game A-plot, the fic focuses on the character interactions of a much smaller and tighter cast, with Louise thrown into the mix.
And Louise is very well done here. Now completely divorced from her canon issues, she has the added benefit of finding something she's actually good at: herding the cats known as SAO's player base. She does this by a combination of scathing commentary, the military discipline she picked up from her family, and being really good at picking apart bad arguments and shredding them.
Where I think the fic does suffer for its lack of detail is in developing the romance between Klein and Louise. It doesn't come out of left field, but it does feel perfunctory. I also really wish I could see her adventures from when she gets back to Halkeginia.
Verdict: Still, I quite enjoy this fic and want it to stay.
Critian Caceorte
Currently Suffering from Space-Time Narcolepsy
- Location
- Washington State
Oh dear, I forgot about that series. I'll talk about it more when you get to it, but I really did enjoy the story when it was still running.
After reading Zero Art Online I have come to one conclusion. God damn Klein and Krito you scary bastards.
Kirito working on a machine to help Yui experience the real world almost after clearing the game is one thing, Klein, if I'm reading the ending right, just out right managed to not only confirm multiple universes, but was able to tear a pathway between his and hers just to meet his wife. Like god damn talk about dedication.
And the Meek Shall Inherit the Galaxy
CV12Hornet
Riter.
- Location
- Tacoma, Washington
Impressions before reading:
Big-name HFY! fic, with more technical errors than an unedited Dan Brown novel.
Review:
Well, I was right about the technical errors. It isn't quite as bad as I feared, in that it's generally readable, but the writing is passive and awkward and has numerous small errors. More to the point, this is just boring. Part of it is that I've read a lot of first contact fics and this doesn't really do much to stand out from the pack. But I think a dire lack of description is part of it, too.
I'm also not terribly sanguine about the portrayal of the Turians here. They seem entirely too hostile to Quarians and a little too Lawful Stupid dogmatic. The patrol fleet, sure, this shit happened in canon already. But I would've thought the high command would've been a little less hostile and eager to jump in feet first.
But mostly, it's just really boring.
Verdict:
nkd1325
KNIGHT OF ORANGE
- Location
- AT HIS MAJESTY'S SIDE
Verdict:
I know that you use all kinds of delet this images but for this one I just have to say WHAT?
Horologer
Incertae sedis
- Location
- a risen sea
If someone wearing a Teletubby costume shows up on your front doorstep in the middle of the night, bearing a shotgun and a dead-eyed poker face, refusing their request is a one-way ticket to Tinky-Winky's body bag.
- Location
- All around you
*squints*Verdict:
Is that Misha Collins?
- Location
- The Middle of the Howling Wilderness
- Location
- USA
Awww...
I actually really like that story.
Oh well. To each their own. It takes all kinds and all that.
I actually really like that story.
Oh well. To each their own. It takes all kinds and all that.
Can't be. No trenchcoat.
tarrangar
Fat arctic chicken
Canonically there are natural points where you can travel between the universes, so while it might be he invented a way to get to Louise's world, it's far more likely that he found a natural gateway.
Applied Cultural Anthropology, or
CV12Hornet
Riter.
- Location
- Tacoma, Washington
Impressions before reading:
jacobk is, his inability to finish a story aside, one of the better SB authors. So if anyone can pull off a Slytherin!Hermione story, it's him.
Review:
Oh, that's some good shit.
Applied Cultural Anthropology starts out on the right foot by avoiding the trap far too many Harry Potter AU and crossover fics do: staying far too long in First Year. Three chapters in and it's off to second year. And really, one of the biggest strengths of this fic is that it avoids most of the fanon pitfalls of Harry Potter fics. Ron, for instance, is not bashed, though the lack of screentime due to Hermione being in Slytherin means we mostly see him at his worst. Harry is even more well-done; in the hands of a different author this would be a temptation to bash him, but he's mostly the same Harry Potter we see in the books. Or just the simple fact that Slytherin house is not a monolithic block of prats. They just like to project that image.
On the technical side of things, jacobk's writing is almost flawless, if more workmanlike than evocative. Still, after so many fics chock full of awkward or passive narration and riddled with technical errors it's a nice change of pace.
But the real treat is Hermione and how the Slytherin environment affects her. Just about all the traits this fic focuses on - certain academic arrogance, a nasty temper and a tendency towards overbearing bossiness, her obsessive need to keep learning - are all present in canon, it's just that canon focuses on Harry Potter and the Slytherin environment is rather more toxic than Gryffindor's. As such, we steadily see Hermione slowly slide towards being the Queen Bitch of Slytherin, and overall become a much more aggressive and defensive person with a dire need to stay on top that wasn't really present in canon. Add in the general prejudice against Slytherins - actually, just a lot of prejudice in general from all angles - and serious annoyance at her fellow Muggleborns for not being as studious as her, and the path to Dark Lord status is very easy to see. Hell, the more recent chapters show she's picked up the general paternal arrogance wizards have towards muggles!
All of this makes Applied Cultural Anthropology the best criticism of the Hogwarts house system I've ever seen. I don't blame canon for not really touching on this - the later books are bloated enough as it is and it is paying homage to old British boarding school novels - but I imagine there are plenty of character screeds lurking in the many Harry Potter fics on this exact subject. This is not a character screed. This is a long, slow demonstration of just how toxic Hogwarts' house system can be, and it's a damn sight more subtle than any screed.
Verdict: Hell yes I'm keeping.
Hogwarts house system, because it matters. For some bloody reason. As somebody who had a house system from both primary and secondary school, where we had enforced competitions I can tell you straight off the number of people who actually cared could be counted with fingers left over.
deathzealotzero
Mecha Guru
- Location
- Las Vegas, NV
Honestly. I mostly agree that is quite boring and that other then my first read through I think I only reread it once because I was and going through several ME stories to reread them. On the other hand it was the first ME fic to do the whole First Contact with another ME species thing. And it nails this really well. The whole thing with Rael and Hannah chatting about their kids exchanging kid toys was gold. But once the First Contact War starts things starting to go downhill with the mentioned errors. Then we the slow build up after the end of the war and going through numerous years at a very slow - glacial- pace. We don't even get to the canon start of the series to well at the very end of the story. So I agree its quite boring, but I add that it is a good read when have nothing to read and want to relax not to mention having some patience.