Bound to Earth: A CK2 Earthbound Quest in an 8-bit Dystopia

Turn 4 Results


Turn 4 Results


Martial: Squash Some Bugs (Buzz Buzz)

DC: 55/80

[CD] is Recovering: They suffer disadvantage on all Martial checks involving combat until their next turn.

1d100 = 85
1d100 = 19 + 16 + 35 (+ Buzz Buzz Loyalty bonus 4.5 rounded to +5) (+4 from Griffinlw's 400 EXP spent) = 79
[Tier 1 Success]

The sun shone brightly overhead.

A light wind blew through the forest that boxed in the path leading up to the Entertainer's Shack.

Most kids your age were at school, playing hooky, or working part time jobs.

You?

You were killing giant insects in the woods with a baseball bat.

Just a few days after losing most of your blood and forcibly regenerating it through the power of high fructose corn-syrup and psychic powers.

It felt like you were constantly swimming and your entire body was made of goddamn concrete.

Even breathing required some amount of effort.

All that kept you moving, pushing yourself, was just your sheer frustration and disgust with the aliens before you.

Your shoulder muscles burned as you brought your bat down on another Attack Slug.

But it was like hitting a pond.

There was a splash, a wet crunch of membranes popping and exploding beneath the force of your bat, but like water rushing in to fill a void there was always something else to take its place.

Buzz Buzz had warned against going after the bugs around the Entertainer's Shack in your state.

But you didn't fuckin' care.

Every day it seemed like there were more and more of the things outside the shack, hidden out of sight. And when you weren't even certain they were solely limited to sticking by the shack anymore?

You knew it was time to go in swinging.

Whatever was in that cave was going to learn about you eventually, you intended to make sure it got a "good" first impression.

For three straight hours you fought up and down the path leading to the Entertainer's Shack. The grass, dirt, tree trunks lining the road soon splattered with the viscous grey slime that made up the slugs. Your bat was stained with the stuff and your clothes would have been soaked with the filth if they weren't already soaked through with your sweat.

Buzz Buzz disagreed with the whole thing, but he was with you the whole time. Taking up the considerable slack your pained, slowed body left.

Watching your back, ramming clean through slugs like a bullet from a gun, and calling out to you when you started to miss things due to fatigue.

"CD, I think that's enough. You can't continue like this in your state."

Buzz Buzz broached the topic after you had won a rare breather. Left leaning against your bat like a crutch, fighting for breath as as a migraine started to blossom in your temples from the slug's numerous failed attempts to hypnotize you.

You fight to say "Fuck that", but the words simply wouldn't form properly.

Glancing down the dirt path, towards the shack, you see more white and grey lines crawling out from under rocks and slithering out of the forest. Another fresh wave of Attack Slugs oozing their way towards you.

...

It's not a matter of swallowing your pride as much as it is swallowing a bit of your own blood.

With a weak, angry stomp to splatter one last Attack Slug, you beat a retreat from the Entertainer's Shack.

"We still thinned there numbers. You did good, especially in your state."

Buzz Buzz's words of encouragement fell flat as you hobbled your way back home. Unable to fight off the feeling you could have done more if you'd just pushed yourself more.

And uh, if you'd stop coughing up blood every couple minutes.


[The Alien Presence in Onnet has been partially diminished]


Stewardship: Beak Point Grift Issues

DC: 25/40/75

1d100 = 68 + 7 = 75
[Tier 3 Success]

Beak Point was truly a sight.

Seated on the outskirts of Onnet to the north where the forest met the cliffs, Beak Point was situated right on the edge. Overlooking the vast, dark ocean that stretched out into the unknown.

When the sun rose or set, the light would hit the water and display colors that seemed so rare in the world.

It made Beak Point beautiful...

And made the Vacant House there a decrepit goddamn eyesore.

Personally, you wished someone would just bulldoze that place but that wasn't going to happen when the fucker who owned continued to insist it was worth the price of a penthouse in Fourside.

But if it wasn't going anywhere, then you might as well see if you can make some money off of it yourself.

If it ended up fucking over the scammer who currently owns the place as a side effect? That was just a bonus.

Issue is, just about anyone you know in the Quarter knows that it's a scam and that the property itself is probably worth less than the bug guts on your bat, meaning you won't be able to trick any rich local to buy your bullshit, thankfully that won't be needed.

All you need to do is to find someone who isn't from around here and has more money than sense, and you have just the plan to find your golden goose!

That plan being…punching in random numbers on telephone and hoping for the best.

...

…Yeah, after the fifth hour you were beginning to regret everything.

It felt like you talked to the whole damn city and then some.

Janitors, housewives, hell even a clown from Raccoon City somehow, and everything in between.

All of which weren't interested in the slightest about your proposition.

You became increasingly thankful you were using someone else's phone (sorry not sorry Porky), you could only imagine what the long distance call charges would look like.

Then, as you were taking a breather with the receiver down, the phone rang.

Someone had called…you?

Picking up the receiver, you pressed it to your ear.

"Yeah? Who is this?"

"Who is this? Why it's Slade Percy Benedict the Third. Esquire!"



The voice of the thing pretending to be a man on the other end of the line made your skin crawl. You could practically envision what they looked like just from the noise.

If a gilded urinal could speak, this was the voice you would imagine it having.

"Who else would be calling you? Your ex-wife? Oh right, she's my wife now. Ahaha~"

Just the way the man, if you dared call this thing a human, laughed made you wish more then anything you could PUNCH him through the receiver.

"Anyway, time is money, and I want MORE of it. I came to chat about that Million Zenny Mansion you have on offer. I need it to complete Uncle's will requirements and I refuse to live in some cheap fast-food quality manor with doors that look like they were made to fit Eggman's derrière through!"

Every second listening to the man was like chugging a milk jug filled with slime.

However, through the ever increasing sense of disgust, you sensed opportunity. Because unless Porky's parents were casually selling mansions, this fucker dialed the wrong number.

"Yeah, sure! I have what you want." You cleared your throat, suddenly trying to muffle your voice.

"Fantastic my good man! So a smooth million is fine then? I'll be paying in cash once the-"

"But, SLADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

A distant, shrill voice sounded out in the background of the call. Somehow both quiet and painfully loud at the same time.

"But Slade! What about the ooooooooooother mansion? I don't want to live in a neighborhood with filthy animal people! What if one gets caught under the wheels of the limo you're DEFINITELY going to buy me?"

"Hahah. Yes, FASCINATING dear-"

You could tell the man on the other end was laughing through gritted teeth as he leaned closer to the receiver.

"Nevermind her. WOMEN, am I right?" A far more genuine laugh escaped the caller's lips.

"I'd shut her up the cheap way, but uncle really had some sort of fetish for 'legal marriage'. Anyway, about that transaction- "

"Slade?" You abruptly cut him off, your knuckle going white around the phone.

"Yesssss~?"

"I have some very sound financial advice that I'm going to give you. For free."

You point the receiver at your face, glaring into it.


"Get the sharpest knife you own, castrate yourself, and go sign up for clown college. Trust me, it's your calling!"​


You slam down the receiver and end the call.



"Wait-"

A wave of realization surges over you as your anger passes.

"FUCK! No! I should have waited till they sent me the money! Why didn't I-ARGHHHHH."

You grip the sides of your head as you sink to the floor, a mix of unreleased anger and regret boiling in your stomach.

It takes a few minutes, but you're able to collect yourself.

You tell yourself that it was probably a good thing that you didn't try to take the man's money.

"Fuck it. One more try, then I'm going home."

Standing to your feet you dialed the phone one last time. Pressing the receiver back against your ear.

After a few rings, someone picks up.

Practically on auto-pilot at this point, you give your pitch. Waiting to either hear the person on the other side hang up or-

"...Tell me more."

You blinked.

The voice on the other side was…strange. You could understand him clearly, yet at the same time it sounded less like a voice and more like a chew toy getting eviscerated by a pit bull.

"Hello? I'm starting to lose my patience here."

You shake your head to clear it.

"R-Right, sorry. As I was saying, there's some prime land up for grabs that I can help you get for less than what it is on the market if you've send some of your savings my way."

You feel the hairs on your neck starting to stand, why the hell were you feeling intimidated by talking to this guy? It's not like you accidently got a hold of a fucking mob boss or anything.

What followed were several moments of very uncomfortable silence, with the exception of faint chittering you heard on the other side of the line,

"...And you said this was in the Eagle Quarter, right?"

"Uh…Yeah."

"...I'm interested, so let's talk about the details and you'll be compensated accordingly."

1 week later

Buzz-Buzz tilted his horn as he landed on the table where you had upturned the sack.

"Is this…currency?"

You grunted as you looked at the small pile on the table before you.

"Hell if I know, they definitely aren't Eagle Dollars though."

Not that you really expected Eagle Dollars from someone outside the Quarter, but you would have been fine with some corporate scrip like Zenny, something you could easily exchange.

What you got from the last guy you called was not anything like that. It came in a small burlap sack that was shoved into your mailbox.

After a few minutes of pulling the damn thing out, you finally took it in your house and proceeded to dump the whole damn thing onto the kitchen table.

What was inside where a ton of gold coins…or at least you think they were gold?

They were mostly blank with the exception of a carving of a star on both sides of it in the center. At the very bottom of the bag was a letter:

"Thanks for the tip kid, and a pretty crafty plan too. Beak Point ain't much, but it'll serve its purpose once I send a few of my boys and introduce my business to a market that I've been trying to get into for a while.

Let's keep in touch, I can tell you're planning big things and I'm looking forward to seeing what you do. Hell, I'll even give you a discount on my real estate offers once I fully engrained myself into the Quarter.

Sincerely,


Tom Nook, CEO of Nook Homes Inc."

…You don't recognize the name, but suddenly your gut is saying that a fucking mob boss would have been preferable.


[You gain +2 Funds and +15 Reputation with Nook Homes Inc]


Intrigue: Investigate Local Assets in Town (Porky)

DC: 20/60/90

1d100 = 35 +3 +24 = 62
[Tier 2 Success]

When you told Porky you wanted to look around to see what businesses were around in Onnet (and then clarified, no, not for the purpose of breaking in and stealing shit at night), you expected a lot of grousing from your prick of a neighbor and for him to half-ass the whole thing.

The former did happen, but surprisingly he ended up pulling his weight fully when put into action, and that's sure as hell saying something.

…It's almost scary how good someone like him is at snooping around in places he shouldn't.

That being said, despite both of your efforts the end result was less than you hoped, but it's not out of a lack of trying, more just-

It's fucking Onett.

A place where most businesses are either mom-and-pop shops owned by people that are too stubborn to divorce, or those rundown thrift stores that you're certain would have been drug dens dispensing Rings and Power Pellets to toddlers if Captain Strong wasn't who he was.

In conclusion, not many places you could milk for funds to kickstart your organization were present.

So, you two moved on looking for details on the bigger businesses you normally wouldn't think you had a chance of getting in on.

The Arcade was immediately dismissed by virtue of being the Sharks HQ, followed soon by the Burger Shop because the Manager there was suspicious of you after catching you rooting through their trash for their thrown away orders back when you needed to bribe Baseball Cap earlier.

That left two other places you could possibly get some cash from:

The first is Mach Pizza, the slowest pizza delivery service in the Quarter (and you'd bet your right kidney it was in the whole City too) that's only still around because they are the only one of their kind in the Quarter.

The second was the local baseball bat factory (which apparently also has a building for more general sporting goods on the side that you weren't aware of) on the outskirts of town whose products are probably used to break open heads more often than they are to play ball.

You didn't look much deeper than that.

Porky though? Next time you met him, he apparently went deeper and found a few interesting tidbits (while also being insufferably smug).

From what he told you, the lockdown has apparently hit those two hard.

They were already struggling, but now cut off from the rest of the Quarter?

It's a nightmare for any red-blooded capitalist as demand dries up and finished products are either left in storage or thrown away outright.

You're sure you can use this to your advantage, the question is: How?

If you can find some way to leverage the situation, legal, illicit, or otherwise, you could get the passive income needed to run some kind of group.

[MACH PIZZA & The ONNET BASEBALL BAT FACTORY have been discovered as potential passive income sources!]

[DC for actions related to Mach Pizza and the Onnet Baseball Factory are slightly lowered for the next three turns.]

Learning: Poke Around Town

DC: [AUTOPASS]


"...And that's about the gist of what happened."

You finish explaining as you hold an ice pack on your head while lying in bed.

They really did have to hit you from behind, those bastards.

On your nightstand stood Buzz-Buzz who was listening intently, "You were ambushed by the Sharks while you were scouting out the town then?"

"Pretty much, bastards jumped me while I was passing through an alleyway, hence-" you make a vague gesture towards your own body, "The new bruises and shit, and I've already exhausted my healing today."

Wait…shit, how are you going to explain them to your siblings now that you think about it?

Hmmm, may have to break into your sis' makeup to cover up the worst of it, she's going to either get angry or tease you relentlessly if she finds out but either would be better than the squirts thinking you're getting into fights again.

"I see…" Buzz-Buzz hummed, "despite the circumstances, you still seem to be in good spirits."

"Of course, I just love getting my shit kicked in when I'm at my weakest, what gave you that idea?"

A moment of silence

"...Well, until now you have been smiling slightly ever since you came home."

Wait, really?

...

Goddammit.

"Tch…fine, I guess I am."

"Did something else happen then?"

"Yeah, yeah, I was getting there anyway. Hold your horses."

Buzz-Buzz tilted his head, "Those are the quadruped creatures humans are fond of, yes? I don't have any of my own to hold, nor do I think I could even so."

…right…alien.

You sigh, "Figure of speech, BB. It means to be patient."

"Ah…" Buzz-Buzz pauses again, "...I don't see the correlation."

"It's because…look, do you really want me to give you a fucking English lesson or do you want me to finish my story?"

"...Apologies then, please continue."

"Right…" you groan as you clutch the icepack tighter to your head, "...Shit, where to I even begin with this one…"


[CANON CONVERGENCE]


[Omake: Birds of a Feather has occurred!]

-Once an organization is founded Kyōko is available for recruitment at any time, regardless of the roll made-
You've gained insight into Kyoko's capabilities...
Name: Kyōko

Stats
  • PSI: X
  • Martial: 15
  • Diplomacy: 7
  • Stewardship: 8
  • Intrigue: 9
  • Learning: 9
Opinion: +15
Traits:

  • River City Girl: You can take the girl out of River City, but not the River City out of the girl. During Combat Encounters Kyoko will always have access to one of following actions for 0 Action Points per turn unless explicitly stated otherwise.
    • Find Weapon [0 AP]: A stick, a bat, a chain, a rock, a brick. It'll fall apart after the fight, maybe even during the fight, but you can always find something. And disposable weapons have their place...
    • Throw Something [0 AP]: A rock, a trash can, a bicycle, maybe even an enemy!
    • Pat Down Bodies [0 AP]: Money has a habit of disappearing as soon as it hits the ground in River City, so making a habit of looting is natural. In combat using this action on a defeated has a chance to give a temporary item, a small amount of Funds, or information.
  • Bird of a Feather: Kyoko's really hit it off with you. People tend to focus on two delinquents rather then what the delinquents are doing. Kyoko's resting Opinion with CD will always be +10 unless betrayed. When assigned to an action with CD that would otherwise generate Suspicion due to PSI usage, etc, roll a 1d100. If the result is 1 to 5, no suspicion is generated. Otherwise the amount of Suspicion generated is merely lowered.
  • Homesick: The current state of River City is upsetting to Ryoko, even if they don't show it or make it clear. As the situation deteriorates, so too will Ryoko's mood and ability to focus...
Description
A peppy yet rough and tumble girl from River City. They moved to Onnet recently due to the troubles going on in their old home town. Having helped you in a scrape, they seem friendly and reliable. They seem to have moved to Onnet just prior to the lockdown and only really became known after finishing up with the hassles of moving so abruptly. Seems the River City residents knew things were getting bad long before the news got out...

Buzz Buzz: Explore the Town

1d100 = 36

Buzz Buzz hadn't really wandered too far from CD after arriving on the planet.

It wasn't simply the fact they were being pursued, or that the fledgling pink-haired psychic clearly needed help. The fact of the matter was that Buzz Buzz as an alien.

Even after all the research they did to figure out the technological standards of the world, there was so much that they simply didn't know.

Assumed facts after all differed from real experiences.

Prior to the defeat of the Starman JR, whenever Buzz Buzz wasn't working with CD they had simply loitered around CD's home and stayed out of trouble.

While the Starman JR's death hardly signified the end to Giygas's pursuit or the possible presence of his agents, it certainly felt like a opportunity to be more adventurous.

Flying out CD's second story bedroom window Buzz Buzz's wings cut through the air as he flew around the town.

It really put in perspective both how big and small Onnet was when seen from above.

Onnet was a place of conflicting concepts.

For all intents and purposes it was a proper, urbanized city. Yet at the same time it felt like a town, not being too big and having a smaller feel to it.

Brick buildings, hot asphalt roads, and merciless stretches of concrete ended at thick forests, natural cliffs, and steep drop-offs into the sea.

Idyllic streets with individual houses and white picket fences existed in the same city as cramped brick apartments situated between alleyways teeming with delinquents, feral dogs, and unforgiving police on patrol.

Compared to the rest of The City, with it's all consuming steel giants and relentless urban sprawl, Onnet and by extension the rest of the Eagle Quarter, seemed like a slice of Earth.

...But it had it's own problems and it's own dangers.

While there was greenery and an actual ecosystem, Buzz Buzz could tell that was mostly due to the ambient PSI influence of the Sanctuaries.

Either they had greatly enhanced the efforts of early settlers to terraform the area using conventional methods, or the subconscious desire of the people to have a 'piece of Earth' manifested over time.

Even then, how long would that last?

How long until the local ecosystem was ruined for profit, or through simple neglect or foolishness?

Flying past the tightly guarded barricades of the O.P.F, the state of the forest to the south of Onnet was impressive. Thick, dense, and intimidating with only dirt paths cutting through the woods instead of proper asphalt roads or any sort of highway.

Of course, the woods appeared to be more active then Buzz Buzz first assumed.

Even though they could avoid the notice of humans and grounded animals very easily, birds and things that enjoyed 'bugs' were far more of an issue. Buzz Buzz left the woods earlier then he wanted to, only probing shallowly into it.

Still. Even without Giygas's influence, the wildlife in the Eagle Quarter seemed particularly...hostile at times.

As the sun began to set on yet another day of exploring, Buzz Buzz couldn't help but feel a little frustrated.

Though they had gained a greater understanding of Onnet and the Eagle Quarter to some degree...he hadn't come away with many, if any practical realizations.

Understanding the place he was protecting was special and worth saving in it's own right wouldn't help him, or CD actually protect it.

On the way home however, Buzz Buzz couldn't help but notice the strange smell in the air as they cautiously buzzed past the police station.

A large stone building sat on the corner adjacent to the O.P.F headquarters.

The smell of grain products and caramelized sugars wafted through the air, tickling various parts of Buzz Buzz's brain. It was only when they flew closer that they realized it was a Bakery.


"SKIP BREAKFAST BAKERY"

It was a cozy looking establishment. Large glass front windows gave obvious views of sandwiches, breads, and pastries. Beyond it a brightly lit interior with tiled floors and a warm atmosphere, both literally and figuratively.

Buzz Buzz was surprised CD had never mentioned the place and wondered why it hadn't been brought up before.

Those questions stopped almost immediately when Buzz Buzz saw nearly all of the customers were police officers.

In the few moments they were present, Buzz Buzz saw more law enforcement enter and leave the bakery then potentially the O.P.F headquarters itself.

It became abundantly clear why the youth of the city steered clear of the bakery, especially with it's proximity to the station. However, Buzz Buzz couldn't help but notice how particularly good looking the sandwiches were and how well off the bakery was.

Buzz Buzz kept thinking about the bakery well after he had arrived back at C.D's home.

Maybe his exploration wasn't a waste after all.


[The Skip Breakfast Bakery has been discovered as a place of interest!]​


Porky: Check on Picky

1d100 = 86

Ugh.

Cass was making Porky do too much work.

In that, she was making him do any work.

It didn't help they were literal next door neighbors. Porky couldn't exactly stay home and sleep in without the bat lugging future-criminal lumbering over to disturb his sleep.

"Porky did you even go outside today?"
"Porky what did you learn about the local businesses?"

"How the fuck are we going to make money Porky?"
"Did you just FART right next to me, Porky?"

Nag nag nag nag nag.

Porky never realized how much more he wanted to sleep after spending days slinking around town.

He was already regretting not weaseling out of CD's request when she knocked on his door.

...Except not really.

Porky hated having to run around so much. He hated having to wake up early. He hated having to hide in trash cans and avoid cops, Sharks, and those fucking stray dogs.

But he'd be a pretty impressive liar if he could hide the fact he actually having a lot of fun.

Porky always known people in town were stupid, but now that he was actually fishing for information and sneaking around(or having other people sneak around for him)? He knew they were more dumbasses in town then actual asses.

CD wasn't much of an exception given how bad she was at being subtle.

The difference with her though was that she actually needed him.

...

And she could bend his body into a pretzel if she wanted too. Which was the primary reason Porky bothered listening to her. Yeah, that was it.

Of course, even if he was having fun, Porky grew desperate for a 'vacation day'.

Problem was that CD could smell most of his bullshit with surprising ease. None of the usual excuses worked with her, so one day he just went with whatever came off the top of his head.

"Uh, I need to check up on Picky! It's been a while and he's probably gotten into trouble without me around."

"...Alright. I'll handle the rest myself."

And it WORKED.

Going home Porky was thrilled at the idea of being able to slack off and do jack-and-shit for a day.

Of course, when he closed the front door behind him it was only then he realized how quiet his house felt.

Normally, that was a good thing. The opposite meant that his 'parents' were home.

Yet it was only when Porky returned to the house after not being there constantly that he sensed a distinct absence.

"Picky?"

Porky vaguely recalled his brother being around at points? He remembered bullshitting to him about a snake, and seeing him around town where the Sharks were...

The more Porky thought about it the more problematic it seemed. If something had happened to Picky then it would mean hell for him if his parents ever found out.

Letting out a groan, Porky began to look around the house. His heavy footsteps coming across as equally labored as they were concerned.

"Picky where the frick are you! You better not have drowned in the bathtub!"

Throwing open the door to their shared, cramped, filthy room, Porky watched as Picky leaned up in bed holding a comic book.

"Hi!" Picky said, rather absent-minded.

"Picky! Where have you been?"

"I've been here?"

"I know that now but where have you been the past couple of weeks?"

"Well where have you been?"

"That's uh, that's not important. Tell me what you've been up to!"

Porky ended up regretting that question.

Because Picky did end up telling him about what he had been up to. In excruciating detail. Down to every last snake, Shark, and hospital visit.

By the end Porky's eyes were glazed over and he was barely listening. Seated firmly on the couch and having something as close to an out of body experience as he probably could.

Night had fallen by the time Picky was finished.

"Why did you ask?" Picky said, staring for several seconds as Porky's large body sank further into the couch cushions.

"I'm wondering that myself...I mean-" Porky muttered to himself as he started to wake up, realizing to his horror how the entire day had slipped by.

"I just wanted to make sure you weren't dead from snakebites or something."

Porky's had was shot and he was hungry.

Reaching into his back overall pocket, Porky pulled out a snack. A large, soft chocolate chip cookie. Wrapped in plastic and warmed from the radiant heat of his body to the point the chocolate chips were nice and gooey.

As he started to unwrap it however, Porky could feel Picky's eyes on it.

He considered breaking off a crumb to share, but-

"Here, take this." Porky said, breaking eye contact with the large cookie before he could reconsider. "It's a reward for not dying."

"Really!?" Picky's eyes lit up as he had to ate the large, partially sat on cookie with both hands. "You're not...mad?"

"Ugh, Mom and Dad are mad at us enough as it is for being here. So no." Porky sank further into the seat, simply wanting to sleep.

"Thanks, Porky!"

Porky watched through half-closed eyes as Picky scampered off, taking bites out of the cookie as he did so.

For once Porky was too tired to lie. Well, except about the hospital.

The hospital visit and subsequent bill, was a potentially BIG problem. If it actually got back to Porky, or god forbid his parents, then he'd be in for hell. Even getting a doctor to look at you cost an arm and a leg.

At the same time though, it got Porky thinking...

The hospital in Onnet was one of the few 'big' places outside of the police station. It had lots of staff, all kinds of drugs, and various machinery. He was no doctor, and hell maybe the people who worked there weren't, but It was supposedly a proper hospital.

Using the excuse of trying to pay a bill would probably get the staff salivating at a chance to scalp more money. While, at the same time, could open up an opportunity to nab some stuff or break in later on.

CD was seemingly against robbing people, for SOME reason...

But she'd robbed the mayor's house, or one of his houses, without losing a wink. And next to the mayor the hospital were probably the second biggest crooks in town.

Maybe CD just needed a little convincing that there was a good opening to go along with the idea.

Porky thought that as he properly fell asleep. Miserable at his day off had been ruined...

And thankful that his little brother wasn't dead.

[Porky's Diplomacy score has increased by +1. His relationship with his brother is maintained]

[
The DC for any Intrigue actions against the local hospital are halved for the first attempt due to a potential exploit being found.]

Diplomacy: Speak with your Mother

DC: [UNKNOWN]

[Advantage on roll due to enthusiasm from your siblings]
1d100 = 2
1d100 = 23 + 7 = 30

It's been two hours.

The sun has already set outside the living room window. Most people are wrapping up work or already heading home.

You continue to stand in your own living room, staring at it.

Your hands won't stop shaking.

A hot, angry shame rises into your throat.

You've been mauled by birds and by literal horrors from space.

You've pushed yourself till your bones broke and your blood vessels burst.

You've nearly died twice this year alone.



And you would happily suffer through all of it again then pick up the telephone and call that dreaded number.

You promised your siblings you would.

That was at the start of the month.

Every time they brought it up, you'd find or make an excuse.

That you had somewhere you needed to go, someone you needed to see, something more important that just couldn't be put off.

It was only yesterday when your siblings just didn't bother asking, simply glancing at you from across the dinner table with disappointment in their eyes during breakfast that you realized something.

You're afraid.

"There's no point."

Some part of you whispers. Just like it always has.

"Nothing good will come of it. It'll just hurt. It'll just cause you pain and misery."

Every time you reached for the phone, you'd almost flinch away.

"You aren't going to hear what you want to hear."

One step towards the phone, two steps back. Hands trembling even harder.

"She's fine. She's always fine. She's just fine without us. I bet she's partying it up right now. We have more important things to do. We have a world to save. We don't need her!"

All you want to do is run away. Climb up the stairs and slide into bed.

"And if she's not fine? Who cares!"

To drift off into some idyllic dream and not have to feel any of this.

"We'd be happy if she was dead!"

You wince as the thought crosses your mind.

No.

Nononononono.

NO!

That's not true.

Some part of you hates your mother.

Resents her.

You grow frustrated just thinking about her.

But the idea of her dying?

Of being hurt?

Of never being able to talk to her. To lose out on a chance to feel...normal around her?

...

You forced yourself to walk forward.

The steps you take towards the living room telephone are the hardest you've ever taken.

Your hands shake to the point you can barely hold the receiver. You end up dialing the wrong number several times before you get it right.

Just hearing the dial tone in your ear feels deafening. Your stomach clenches.

Then you hear someone on the other end pick up.


View: https://youtu.be/OWWQ2dhq5Go?feature=shared
Listen on repeat until next musical stinger.

Your name is Recerd Darnel.( YOU BELONG TO GIYGAS.)

You type at your computer.( A SLAVE BEFORE AND A SLAVE NOW)

The work day is nearly over.( OBEY ⚕Don't listen.)

16.9 hours and counting.( YOUR TIME BELONGS TO A NEW MASTER)

You do what you're supposed to do.( YOU HAVE NO FREE WILL)

You do what's expected of you.( YOU ARE OUR TOOL)

Once that's over, you will do what you have been tasked with.( YOU WILL COMPLETE YOUR MISSION AND END YOUR LIFE ⚕Don't listen. You deserve life.)

That's all you have left.( WASTED HUSK MEANT TO BE USED ⚕You can still be happy.)

That's all you are.( YES.⚕No.)

That's all you will be.( A WEAKLING. ⚕Someone who's struggling.)

That's all you can be.( GIVE IN TO US ⚕You can be someone new.)

The office around you is filled with a dull drone. The clatter of keys being pushed, phones ringing off the hook, and the thrum of computer fans and servers working in the background. Poorly lit and poorly ventilated, the 14th Customer Service Department of WilyCorp feels sterile and dead.

Despite nearly a hundred people working the floor, there's no unnecessary talking or human sounds. All anyone does is read off the scripts, pick up the phones, and fill out paperwork.

You doubt the rest of the company would even believe people are actually employed in the department and not machines.

You certainly don't.

You've worked here long enough to know better.

...

How...how long has it been since you started working here?( IT DOESN'T MATTER.)

It's not important.

It's easier not to think about things that upset you.

It's...easier not to think at all.( DO NOT THINK)

The phone rings in front of you.

You pick it up, ready to speak your usual line.

"Mother, it's me."

It takes every ounce of will not to hang up the phone as soon as you hear the voice.( ⚕Don't be afraid. Listen to her voice.⚕ WHAT? NO! WHY ARE THEY COMMUNICATING WITH YOU?)

"Cassie-" You stammer, your hand already slick with sweat. The world starts to abruptly come back into focus.

"It's CD, Mother."

In an instant you become aware of how tired you are. How fast your heart is racing.( ⚕That's it. You need this. You both need this. Please don't hide anymore.⚕ HANG UP NOW. OBEY. CEASE!)

As your free hand begins to involuntarily move to end the call, you stop it. Realizing for the first time in months that it wasn't you moving that hand.( ⚕You can do it. I will protect you. You will protect yourself.⚕ OBEY US OBEY US!)

"Listen, Mom-"

A sharp pain blossoms in your chest. As if an invisible hand was squeezing, strangling your heart.( BROKEN TOOLS WILL BE BROKEN FURTHER. DIE! ⚕Your master has no power over her now. She is still faithful to me.⚕)

"D-don't get all pissy and take this the wrong way-"

All you can do is breathe heavily into the phone. It feels like you're going to die. ( ⚕⚕Astra inclinant, sed non obligant. Liberabo te.⚕⚕ No no no! Weak animals will never be free! )

"But are you...alright?"
...​


...​


...​


View: https://youtu.be/Wl2GjjE7rdA?feature=shared
Listen on repeat until the end.

You feel something torn from you.

It's as if a hand was on your head the entire time. Squeezing your thoughts, your very mind.

Hearing Cassie's voice, feeling the panic rush through you, leaves you feeling like you just woke up.

All while another hand pries the other hand off your head and breaks it's fingers.

"Mother?"

When you hear Cass's voice speak, another voice speaks to you.

A kind voice.

A familiar voice.

One you stopped caring about you a long time ago.

"Hello? Are you alright?"( ⚕You are still faithful. I am here for you⚕. )

"I don't think I've been alright since I was a little girl."

"Back on Earth, things were wonderful."


The words spill from your mouth.

Part of you wants to stop. Knows this will only hurt-

"I would get up every day with so many things I wanted to do. So many aspirations, so much possibility. I had so many things to look forward to."

"Even when things were at their worst, I could look outside and find something to smile about. I had my friends and my family, I had the familiar blue sky."

"...And one day all that was gone. Forever."


But it continues to spill out. As if the walls you built in your mind were bulldozed and there's nothing to keep the truth inside anymore.

"I still remember how cold and frightening it was on those ships."

"Crammed shoulder to shoulder with strangers as we left the Earth behind. Trying to stifle my cries as everything I knew, everyone I cared about,
died."

"When we arrived here Cass, we were told it would be a chance to start over. To begin again. To make things better."

"But that was a lie."

"It was
all bullshit. All they have ever done is lie since we got here."

"Because the
truth has a way of ruining things."

"The reality of this city is that it's everyone for themselves. You're either out for yourself and striving to gain power, or you're the one getting stepped on or used for someone else's gain."

"
Love? Compassion? Those died with the Earth."

"I used to be like
Light, you know."

"I tried to convince myself that wasn't the case for a while. I tried not to live in the past. I worked hard. Hell, I was even brave enough to try and fall in love…"

"And look at me now."


"M-Mom? Where is this all coming from?"

"Mom?" You ask, as if the word was something alien.

Something you didn't deserve to be called.

"A mother is supposed to love their children. Unconditionally."

"No matter the difficulties, no matter the obstacles, no matter the opinions, or the stress, or the things you see in your children, you
need to love them."

"Anyone who doesn't is
evil, aren't they?"

"What kind of person can't love the very life they brought into the world? What kind of person can't imagine the anguish that a child would go through being told they weren't loved? Being told they weren't wanted?"

"..."


On the other end of the line you can hear CD's breathing grow erratic. You can all but imagine her finger curling around the phone.

Just the thought of her face is enough to force the air from your lungs.

But you say it anyway.

"It just feels like another obligation."

"Another expectation to fill. Another checkbox to sign off on. Just another
mistake to live with. Just another thing I'm supposed to do."

"But I've done my best, haven't I?"


Your voice withers with uncertainty, sounding more like a plea.

"I've worked a job I hate to provide for all of you. I've thrown away my youth, my health, my potential just to provide for you."

"I get up every day with nothing I want to do or can do. I have no prospects, the possibilities of my youth are gone. There's nothing I have to look forward to, except maybe ATARI blowing up the offices or someone leaving the roof door unlocked…"


A laugh escapes your lips.

But you and CD know you aren't kidding.

"I've gotten this far. I've endured this much. I want to think of myself as being strong. As enduring something so awful for so long. For sacrificing for my children…"

"But no matter what I tell myself, it doesn't change the fact I only did all this because I'm scared to try anything else."

"It doesn't change the truth that just hearing your voices
churns my stomach."

"I'm filled with dread every time I see your face. Their faces. It was all I could do not to run out the door or hide in the bathroom the last time I came home."

"It's why I stay at work. I hate it here, but I feel worse when I go home. All I am is reminded of how much I'm losing. How much time I have left."

Hunching over you clutch your head with your free hand.

Just mentioning it brings back memories of the dreams.

Dreams are supposed to fade with time. But the ones you've been having for the past few months are still vivid in your mind.

"I can feel the sand sifting through my fingers."

"My skin wrinkling, my body slowing, my mind rotting inside my skull! How long do I have before I'm left stuck in a hospital bed. A babbling, senile husk who can only shit themselves and look forward to dying!?"

"What am I supposed to do?"


Your voice cracks like broken glass.

"WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?"


Shouting into the phone you nearly choke on the words.

The world around you blur as tears burn your eyes.

You press your face into the desk, no longer willing to sit up straight.

"I just want to feel something again. I want to live for myself instead of people I barely know!"

"I don't want this life anymore! I want the person I could be, instead of the person I'm
doomed to be!"

"Is that wrong? Even after trying for so long…Am I evil?"


Looking down to the floor, you nearly press your hands together in prayer.

It's been years since you prayed to her.

You'd always assumed they had forsaken you once you turned your back on them but...

They never left you.

"But that wouldn't be out of the ordinary for this place, would it?"

Pushing your head off the desk, vitriol and anger begin to surge forth. Brushing aside your sadness and your weakness.

"This city is evil. Those in charge are evil. Maybe this entire planet, down to its core, down to its forgotten history, is evil. And nothing is ever going to change-"

You stop.

"Nothing is going to change until we stop lying to ourselves."

"The people in power are afraid of the truth. So…I think it's time I start being honest."


CD remains silent on the other line. All you can hear is her shaky breathing. You know she wants to say something, but can't find the words.

Or she's too afraid to say them.

...

You don't want to be afraid anymore.

"The truth is Cass...I don't want to pretend to be a good mother anymore."

"I hate having to lie to you. I hate having to lie to your siblings. I hate your slithering waste of flesh of a father who tricked me into this. I hate my job. I hate this world. And above all I hate myself."

"For the longest time, I was convinced nothing could change that. That I was better off just doing what I was supposed to instead of suffering the humiliation of trying anything else."

"That being honest with myself, honest to you, would just ruin what little still works in my life."

"...But
she has shown me that's not true. That I can have what I desire. That I can be the person I want to be as long as I'm honest with what I want to be."

"That the truth can lead to more than just consequences and suffering."

"That life is more than just trying to convince yourself you're a 'moral' person. That you can live a life that's for yourself and don't deserve to be damned for it."


"I don't-" Cassie stammers on the other end of the line. "I don't understand, Mom."

"I'm not your mother anymore, Cassie. Then again, as far as you're concerned, I'm sure you feel you've never had a mother. Right?"

A weak, sardonic laugh escapes your lips.

"I have no children. You have no mother. And…things are better this way."

"MOM PLEASE STOP-!" Cassie's voice shouts out over the phone, you can hear the loud crash as she drops to her knees.

"I'M SORRY. WHATEVER I DID I'M SORRY. I'LL BE GOOD. I'LL GO TO SCHOOL. I'LL STOP HURTING PEOPLE I'LL BE WHAT YOU WANT ME TO BE. I'LL BE WHATEVER YOU WANT. PLEASE JUST TELL ME WHAT I DID WRONG. DON'T LEAVE."

The strength in her voice disintegrates like paper put to the flame.

"PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE!"

The girl's desperate, sobbing pleas twist something inside of you.

Guilt and shame threat to strangle you.

You've never understood more completely why you wanted to avoid ever doing this.

"You didn't do anything wrong, CD." You swallow, fighting back further tears.

"You're a good girl. A strong girl. Much stronger then me. That's probably why you hate me. I'm...weak. And when you're weak, your weakness reminds other people of their own weakness. That's why we're better off parting ways. If I don't, we'll both be miserable. And I'll just end up hurting you even more."

Looking down at the satchel on the floor of your cubical, you remember exactly what you were made to build over the last month.

He wanted to hurt CD, didn't he?

"I don't hate you." CD's voice shrinks as she cries, she can barely string together words.

Your eyes start to blister as you reach your limit.

"If we ever meet again, I hope you don't recognize me. I'm leaving to become the person I'm supposed to be. Goodbye…CD."

"MOM WAIT-!"


You hang up the phone.

Tears begin to stream down your cheeks.

Cradling your head in your hands, you breathe deep and force yourself to your feet.

Standing from your desk you leave your cubicle. Walking through the maze like paths to the elevator.

Rising from your desk you leave your cubicle and walk to the elevator.

No one looks at you as you pass.

Amidst the clatter of keyboards and the thrum of electronic equipment, not a single being living or otherwise looks in your direction.

Even though you know your outburst carried through the office.

No one cared.

But you've known that for a while.

As you reach the elevator, you're reminded of the weight pulling at your side.

Your satchel bag.

Flipping open the top you reach inside and pull.

Several handfuls of wires, mismatched fuses dangling off the ends, are ripped clean.

You dump them and your satchel bag in the nearby trash.

The nerve gas bombs built from Robodyne parts won't go off now.

Someone will check the trash and security will be called. No one will die, not like
he wanted.

Stepping into the elevator, you press a button and wait in silence for the doors to close.

Everything hurts.

Your body, your mind, and above all else your heart.

You recognize the only reason this is happening was because your daughter-

...

Was because CD called you. That she was worried about you.

That makes it hurt so, so much more.

But it's done. It's over now.

You're free.

You can start your journey now.


[Your actions have narrowly averted disaster in The City]​


[Recerd Darnel is no longer supporting the household...but she is still alive]​

 
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Letter of Marque
OMAKE: Letter of Marque

"It is currently 12:00 AM, X̸X̶/̸X̸X̴/200X, Hyrule Standard Time, and you are listening to the Strike Force Hazard Advisory Network. Spacefarers traveling in the vicinity of the Razak System are advised to reroute immediately. The Strike Force have confirmed reports of open warfare breaking out between the Yars and the Bydo, the latter of which have been encroaching into Yars space for several months. The Yars have been ambivalent to human shuttles passing through their territory, but the Bydo are known to attack non-Bydo vessels on sight. We heavily encourage ships to avoid the Razak System for the foreseeable future. Updates will be broadcast as the Yars-Bydo conflict develops.

Pigma Dengar's portable radio was only one of the many noises in the dingy interspatial roadhouse where his squadron had been celebrating their successful grounding of a Kilrathi cruiser. This slime-encrusted refueling station, the Shufflepuck, was built out of a hollowed-out asteroid whose vast remoteness from Hyrule made it a popular attraction for patrons from all manners of illegal persuasions. There were smugglers, hustlers, leg breakers, desperados with itchy trigger fingers, and the occasional serial killer for good measure. If you rounded up everyone in the building and tallied their bounties, the sum of zenny would be enough to get you a moderately-sized apartment in Wily Towers.

Or one contract from Star Wolf.

The job was simple, and executed without a hitch. Metpharm needed the planet of Irata cleared of competitors before they could construct a Coriolis Station in the system, and now the corp was free to use Irata as a new pipeline for selling human tech to alien buyers. Star Wolf was one of the priciest mercenary outfits you could buy, but when you had them on your side, you got what you paid for. The three pilots were able to lure the extraterrestrial cruiser out into the open, and before they knew what hit them, the feline aliens were wiped out by smart bombs.

"Additionally, spacers entering the Irata System are to remain mindful of the increased Kilrathi activity in the area. While the Kilrathi are able to communicate in pidgin English, caution is advised when dealing with these belligerent aliens. Do not retreat right away when encountering their fighters; the Kilrathi's predator instincts and Byzantine warrior code will obligate them to give chase. In systems beyond the Strike Force's jurisdiction, your best recourse is to issue a warning over the radio and fire a few shots across the bow before setting your Frame Shift Drive for an emergency jump towards the Hylian System."

The destruction of the Kilrathi in the area was so sudden that the Strike Force's tip line had yet to catch up to the news that they were gone. Between stuffing his face with cheap food and cheaper booze, the porcine uplift was wondering if he should be the one to call in and let them know they've been declawed.

"Remember to travel in numbers where possible to decrease the risk of attack from opportunistic raiders such as the Space Pirates and Star Wolf."

One could hear a pin drop when the radio dropped the Strike Force's slight against the infamous Star Wolf. Practically everyone there heard the insult except Pigma, who was too distracted by the opportunity to get paid four times for the same job to notice. One from MB for the first job of fighting the aliens, one from Uncle Albert for the Kilrathi ship salvage, one from the Eggman for letting slip where Metpharm was gonna be building their new station, and then another load of easy money from the Strike Force when they announced a price on the names of who smothered those cats in the cradle.

"Pigma?" Wolf O'Donnel said in a deceptively calm tone. "Could you turn that radio off?"

The captain of the Star Wolf squadron was a gray wolf by genetics and reputation. He spoke with an aristocratic inflection. While it was impossible for an uplift to be an Old Earth blueblood, moneyed or not, few people had the nerve to question where Wolf O'Donnel got the impression he could act like royalty. Wolf had survived innumerable dogfights as a mercenary pilot for Venom during the Lylat Wars, and came out the other end a seasoned ace with scores of kills to his name. The only blemish on his record was a black patch over his left eye. Lost in combat, but not replaced with cyberware out of respect to the one enemy that got the better of him. Wolf was decked in a blood red flight suit that marked him and his pack as a step above the rest, a dress code he took as seriously as his squad's professionalism.

"Bah, what's the big deal?" Pigma said, brushing off the order that was phrased as a request. "So they think we're like the Space Pirates. They called us all pirates back in the day. Hell, your rank was Pirate 1st Class! Now it's the humans sayin' the same damn thing! Big whoop, right?"

Pigma expected a round of laughter from his crack at the Strike Force's expense. Everyone here was a wanted scumbag. Why else would they be at the Shufflepuck? He knew he was disliked by most of them. They were envious of him being the smartest guy in the room. Even so, he expected at least a chuckle. Instead, Pigma was met with the same silent treatment he got from Lylatian circles that knew he sold them out during the war.

Was it suddenly Pigma's fault that Andross was paying more than the other side? A just cause didn't pay the bills, or afford you the finer things in life. General Pepper's space cops were unable to try him for his savvy business decisions from the war. He took the amnesty, and he'd been especially careful not to break it by staying far away from Lylat or Hyrule. Pigma was a free man, free to do as many crimes as he wanted where no one was looking.

Wolf stood up from his stool, where he'd been enjoying a premium bottle of Captain LeChuck spiced rum, made with sugarcane from plantations in the scant arable lands of the new human capital world. It wasn't cheap or easy to smuggle good alcohol this far past the corporate outposts, so Wolf did not appreciate Pigma inadvertent attempts to spoil his mood. He set down his drink so he could rectify Pigma's behavior.

"Pigma, Pigma, Pigma," Captain O'Donnell chided, in that chillingly peaceable tone he always used before meting out punishment. In one of his hands, Wolf toyed with a Kilrathi hunting dagger he'd been testing the weight of. "After all these years, you still don't know the difference between a pirate and a privateer?"

All of the convicted crooks and reprobates sitting in the stools between them found an excuse to be sitting elsewhere. Only now did Pigma realize that he'd overstepped his boundaries. Pushed a bit too far for his own good. Dengar knew his glib tongue had some room to trade barbs with the boss due to being a damn good pilot, but being damn good only got so far when you wounded Wolf's pride in his craft.

"How about we forget I said anything? We're privateers, Wolf, like you said, and--"

"A pirate is fairly indiscriminate in who they target," the captain explained, before tossing the heavy knife at Pigma's head.

The swine let out a suitably hoggish squeal of terror, fully expecting this was the day he pushed O'Donnel too far. He screwed his eyes shut and expected not to open them again, when he heard a thump and felt a tug on his collar. Once Pigma opened his eyes again, he saw that the knife punctured his jacket, pinning him to the metal wall of the bar. The alien blade clung uncomfortably close to his jugular vein.

"A privateer is precise. We have our contracts, and we carry them out to the letter. A pirate is a scoundrel who takes, and a privateer is a mercenary that delivers."

Wolf walked up to Pigma and pulled the dagger out of his coat. Were O'Donnel inclined to do so, the blade would've been ideally situated to slide horizontally across Pigma's neck.

"That is why Ridley's gaggle of freaks are called pirates, and why Star Wolf are not. Understand?"

The captain of Star Wolf stared into Pigma's eyes. The pig flinched, but Wolf glaring daggers at him was preferable to the alternative.

"Y-Yes sir."

Wolf backed away, and Pigma remembered how to breathe again.

"Good man."

"Rumors of U̶F̵O̶ ̴a̸c̴t̶i̶v̶i̵t̷y̶ in close proximity to Princeps Dominaire have thus far remained u̶n̴s̴u̴b̶s̶t̴a̶n̵t̵i̵a̷t̸e̵d̸--"

Leon Powalsky, the third member of the Star Wolf trio, was an understated presence in the bar. It suited the coldblooded assassin's reptilian nature not to make himself known unless absolutely necessary, though these days, the only thing this hard-angled chameleon killed outside of his starfighter was time on the shufflepuck table.

"--being treated as m̸a̵s̸s̷ ̵h̶y̸s̸t̸e̵r̵i̶a̶ for the time--"

As much as Leon detested Pigma's obnoxious behavior, there was a shortage of able pilots that met Wolf's draconian standards. Algy was long dead, letting Oinkinny onto the team for a period of time was an almost uncharacteristically political decision, and Wolf would rather scoop his other eye out with a spoon then ask Pico to come back after he retired. Last they knew, the snapping turtle had taken the amnesty in earnest, trading out his Wolfen for a racing machine.

Right now, there were no better options. Pigma was still useful, so he stayed on Star Wolf. Leon opted to do both of his teammates a favor and pushed the static-ridden radio off the counter.

"--repeat, there is no a̷l̷i̵e̴n̴ ̴a̵c̸t̷i̷v̸i̸t̶y̴ in or around the City--"

The hardened electronic device shattered on the harder floor, tidily resolving the issue. There were no more incidents after that, and the intensely frigid atmosphere around the bar from when Pigma struck Wolf's ire had steadily thawed to normal.

A day later, Star Wolf received the rest of their payment from Metpharm, stepped into their Wolfen fighters, and departed the Shufflepuck for their next destination.

"Hey, uh, thanks fer pullin' my fat out of the fryer," Pigma reluctantly said to Leon, once he'd had the chance to message his ship. "I thought he was gonna get me for real that time."

"Your squeals make you a preferable target for enemy fighters to shoot down," Leon said coldly.

"W-Whut?" Pigma sputtered.

"That is the reason I tolerate your presence. No more, no less. You retain usefulness to Star Wolf, and that is why Wolf keeps you around. Being difficult to replace and being irreplaceable are two very different things. You would do well not to forget it."

Before Pigma could respond, Leon cut off the call.

"Right," Pigma groused. He switched channels to Wolf's comm. "What's the next job?"

Wolf hailed both of his copilots and gave his team a sharp grin over the video display screen. The kind of smile that told Pigma this gig was going to be a lot harder than he'd hope for.

"The Yars might be alien fly men, but their gold spends as good as everyone else's. WIth the Bydo Empire threatening to turn their homeworld into free proteins, I've lined up an interpreter to help us determine how much they value their lives."
 
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Omake: Fire and Brimstone
OOCL The a side chapter focusing on Brimstone the totally not Basil reference from my last omake and how he's dealing with things. This is more of a sort of joke chapter compared to other ones so I hope you don't mind the ton shift. Consider it out of continuity with the rest unless the GM would rather I put it in.

Fire and Brimstone

"CD...." Buzz Buzz followed his best friend as she walked into Brimstones yard. "Does this place seem... off compared to last time?"

"Brimstone's home is right on the edge of slug territory." Cassie said flatly as she tightened her hands around her bat. "That's why where here, to make sure Brimstone is ok and not some hollowed out husk of a mind slave."

".... Right." Buzz Buzz continued looking around. "Well either way you should be on your guard who knows what kind of tr-"

Before he could finish his statement a rope tightened itself around CD's leg pulling her upward until she was hanging upside down.

"Ha! Your time is up you slug loving motherfu-" Brimstone had jumped from his hiding place brandishing a trowel in one hand and a what CD suspected was some form of improvised explosive in the other. "Oh no! CD I'm so sorry!"

It took CD a little while to calm down Brimstone after he cut her down, he always did have a habit of apologizing for faaaaaar too long when he felt he screwed up.

"No really it's ok Brimstone, if anything I'm happy to see fire the fires of the underworld burning in your eyes again." CD smiled at her friend. "But.... if I might as ask why all the booby traps."

"It's been horrible CD. The people around here have gone nuts!" Brimstone shook his head. "And to make matters worse these creepy slugs keep trying to infest the place.... They do weird things...... ruin my garden.....I hate them so much. So much."

"..... I see." CD looked at her friend. "Well I was actually coming to make sure you hadn't come down with... well the same thing thats been hitting everyone else around here."

"Oh no its just my temper acting up." Brimstone smiled. "Like I said I just hate those slugs so much, and its not just because I know they're going to go aft-"

CRASH!

The two were interrupted by sound of something crashing nearby.

"Oh boy! !t looks like the pit has reached max capacity."

"The Pit?"

"Follow me! I'll show you."

XXXXX

"Thats.... a lot of slugs." CD said taking a gulp as she looked down at the teeming mass of attack slugs squirming about inside the 20ft deep pit, thankfully they seemed unable to crawl out. "How did this happen."

"Oh a lot of my smaller traps lead to this giant pit is all. I whipped up a slippery concoction to keep them from escaping and ruining my garden." A small smile graced Brimstone's lips as he lit up a match, the fire of the match finding a new metaphorical equal in his own eyes. "And its about time to clean it."

He threw the match into the pit causing the entire thing to ignite quickly melting the slugs within in an inferno that from Cassies point of view would make short work of anything unlucky enough to be stuck inside it.

"Aaaaaaaaah." Brimstone's smile widdened as the fire died out.... but the borderline demonic flames in his eyes remained lit. "That's a weight off of my shoulder for now.... can I get you anything while your here? I've done most of my gardening today so beyond re-greasing the Pit I don't have any big commitments to worry about.

XXXXX

"Well your friend definitly isn't under Giyga's control." Buzz Buzz said as the two walked home. "But now he scares me more than your other one."

"Brimestone always did have a thing with fire." CD shrugged as she took a quick look back. "It's probably how he copes with living in the city.... honestly I'm glad that part of him is back.... that part of him fell off when Stormy became a shut in..... he just feels so much more alive now than he has for a while that I can't help but be happy for him."
 
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Omake: Outta the Park
Surprise, motherfuckers.

ENTRY NON-CANON OMAKE GOOOOO!

Outta the Park

C.D's hair whipped about as the air curtain of Onett's local drugstore blasted her with a waterfall of cold wind the moment she stepped in. By the time it was done blowing any opportunistic insects to the four corners of Princeps Dominare, her vision had been reduced to a tangled mess of pink strands.

Clearing away the mop, she stormed towards the aisles, making sure to spare a glare for the nerdy-looking cashier. The man flinched, ducking his head a little as if he was one wrong move away from taking cover behind the register. She held the glare until the sight of his cowering frame was replaced by a rack of bracelets.

Ugh, great. Now she was pissed. Four-eyes should've been thankful she was here on behalf of her siblings; otherwise, she might not have been so willing to let that up-jumped hair dryer go unpunished.

Lousy goddamn stupid Giygas driving animals crazy and making the stores turn their ACs up to fucking eleven and then some to keep them out.

Complaining wouldn't make her errand go any faster, though. So C.D did her best to stamp out the flames of her temper, and set her focus on finding a good set of pencils and a suitable pair of notebooks.

Thankfully, it seemed she'd managed to time her visit perfectly. The shelves were stocked with fresh product, and with her years of prior experience taking care of Kart and Floppy's school supplies, it wasn't long before she had everything she needed.

C.D tried not to think about the growing hole in the family savings that would be getting a little wider today.

Searching for something different to occupy her brain, her eyes drifted towards the baseball section. She already had everything related to the sport that she could ever need, of course, but sometimes it was calming to look at all the minty-fresh bats and fantasize about smacking the stitches out of some unfortunate balls. Or more recently, knocking the teeth out of an annoying Shark.

She was just about to continue heading to the counter when something strange caught her eye. Glancing back toward the section, she felt her feet slowly begin to carry her over, bringing the object into full view.

It was… well.


It was obviously a bat, that much she could tell. But it looked like it had more in common with a piece of corpo-tech than a big stick.

The head was made out of some kind of black material, with bright yellow lines that almost seemed to glow, that drew a set of ovals ringing what could only be the bat's sweet spot on opposite sides. The grip sported wrappings of a reddish-pinkish color (was maroon the right word? Or was she getting her colors mixed up again?) and the handle was outright golden. It even had a little extension on the end with some sort of symbol—a solid circle broken up by an off-center cross.

It took her nearly dropping the pair of notebooks to realize that she'd been staring at the thing for an embarrassingly long time.

C.D tore her gaze away, unwilling to trust herself to not fall into another daze, and settled on the view of the cashier.

"Hey," she called, prompting the guy to jump an inch. "What the hell's this thing?"

"Huh-?" He took a moment to readjust his skewed square glasses. "O-oh, yeah. That. Uh…"

His hand came up to scratch his head, and she felt her eyes flatten, already having an idea of what he would say.

"I have no clue, honestly. It didn't come packaged with the usual stock of baseball stuff, and the box was unmarked." He shrugged. "I thought it was some kinda mistake, but my manager told me to put it up with the rest of the bats, so I figured it was above my pay grade and decided not to ask."

"Really…" She glanced at the incongruous whacking rod again. "Where d'you think it's from?"

His hands came up in a helpless gesture. "Beats me. It looks megacorpy enough, but the color scheme doesn't bring any one brand to mind, and whatever that thing attached to the handle is supposed to be, I've never seen it." A quick push set his square lenses back up his nose. "Could be WilyCorp, or RoboDyne, could be one of the hundred other bit-players in the City, could be a prototype from one of the brainiacs up in Winters. Heck, for all I know, it could've been made in a shack by some guy with too much free time and he decided to ship it here for a laugh."

Yeah, that was about what she'd figured.

On a whim, she checked the price tag.

…oof. Right, novelty was worth a lot in a place like Onnet. She should probably count herself lucky that none of the kids with deeper pockets had swung by yet, or else she never would've gotten to see this thing. Whatever it was.

Still, she did have just enough on hand…

But no. She wasn't here for her own sake. What she should be doing was striding up to the cashier, paying for the stuff her siblings needed to have the best futures they could get in this crapsack world, and going home. Not gawking at a retro space-age-looking bat like she was six years old again. The thing probably wasn't even any different from all the other bats hanging from the hooks in terms of function anyhow.

She turned away, towards the counter.

"Well, what do you want to do when you grow up?"

She stopped.

"Why don't you join it now?"

She shut her eyes.

"It doesn't mean you can't learn!"

She heaved an exasperated sigh.

"God… damn it."

She turned back around.

After so many years of abstinence, many of C.D's memories of her golden baseball days had faded into a morass of wooden cracks, metal prangs, grass, and dirt.

One thing she did clearly remember, however, was that breaking in a new bat was a particularly special occasion.

Nobody knew how or why it started, or if it was an old Earth thing that had carried over, or a new City tradition. But every kid in Onnet that owned a mitt, a helmet, and a ball-basher knew that when you retired an old bat and picked up a new one, you couldn't just kick things off with any regular old swing. You had to make it worth it. Show the bat the respect it deserved, let it know that its time with you would be worth treasuring, stuff like that.

…and maybe show off to the other kids that you were gonna wreck some face with your shiny new toy, but that was beside the point.

C.D's inaugural swing with Ol' Reliable—not that she actually called it that, but the recently-refurbished bat could probably be the poster child for the phrase—had involved a blisteringly fast line drive to center field that shot right through the wickets of the pitcher's legs, bounced clean over the second baseman's head, and nearly knocked the center fielder clean off his feet. By the time he'd recovered, she was already halfway to third base.

It wasn't quite a home run, but it had been a damn good swing, and the numbing vibration she'd felt through her hands in the moment her bat connected with the ball had been oh so satisfying.

The fact that some of the town boys started avoiding her after that day was a bit of a sobering thought, but it wasn't nearly enough to tarnish the memory.

And now, hopefully, she would get to recapture it in a new form.

C.D took a gander at the yellow-striped black monster, slung over her shoulder, and couldn't resist letting the beginnings of an excited smile begin to quirk up the tips of her lips.

"Ready, my friend?" Buzz-Buzz asked from her side.

Just like that, the smile stretched wide. "Let's see what this baby can do."

It took barely any time at all for them to find what they were looking for.

"Well, would you look at that?" She was showing teeth now. "We've got us a volunteer."

One of those damned CROWS had flown out from a bush, and it made no secret of its intentions.

The bat came off her shoulder, and into both hands.

Okay. She wanted this to be special. That meant she had to focus. Be patient. Capitalize on the opening as hard as she possibly can.

She had a pretty good read on these jackasses by now. She just needed to wait for the right moment, when it would attempt to dive…

There.

And she had to step aside, plant her feet, wind up like so, step, and-

SWING!


Red and black sparks lashed across her vision, all other colors ceasing to exist as matter split from antimatter and re-collided into a mind-bendingly massive release of pure energy. She could feel it all through her arms and her hands as they simultaneously went sore and numb; the utterly impossible kinetic buildup the bat was somehow unleashing all at once, in the blink of an eye. The sound was indescribable, mixing with the sweet music of every last bone in the crow's body being powderized all at once.

Then the moment passed. She followed through on the swing, twisting and bringing the bat up to her other shoulder as full color returned to the world.

The crow was nowhere in sight. All that could be seen was… a trail of smoke?

…oh. There was the crow.

The fireball trailed up, up, becoming a tiny bright speck that seemed to scrape the clouds, then came down, down, down, and fell past the horizon.

C.D slowly blinked.

"Holy shit."

Ohhh, yeah.

Wait. That wasn't her voice.

Her head slowly swiveled to side-eye the listing form of Buzz-Buzz.

It took half a minute for him to come back to himself. "O-oh. Uh… ahem."

She let him stew a bit more before she began to giggle. It wasn't long before she escalated up to outright laughter, raising her bat towards the sky in glorious victory.

"HOME RUN, BITCHES!"

So I just finished reading everything currently available, got a brainworm that wouldn't stop shouting "what if a critical on the shop roll gave us a Home Run Bat?", and banged this out in about three to four hours.
I ended up using the Smash 4/Ultimate design of the bat, because it honestly looks like a cyberpunkish overdesigned baseball bat that a sufficiently mad scientist would produce on a lark.
For the moment of impact, I made sure to throw in visual references to the 'finishing blow' screens from Ultimate in particular, 'cause they're badass.
I know there's no way we'd actually be able to get something this absurdly powerful at such an early point, but I can dream. Just as much as I can dream of shocking Buzz-Buzz into swearing.
And I tried my best with the color. Wasn't able to extract much from the existing threadmark test, so I gave it my best approximations for established characters.
 
Omake: Dog Chasing The Sun


Dog Chasing The Sun (Omake)


The area in which Pete prowled was known by many names. Some called it The Wasteland, others Filgaia, others the Great Desert.

It was a cruel and brutal land, where law and order was given out at the end of a gun barrel. Advanced technology was rare and difficult to find, instead most people used and maintained pre-war guns.

To Half-Fast Pete, it was the New Wild West. And it was his hunting grounds.

The town he was in right now… well Pete didn't care to remember its name. It was just another little slice of life taken over by outlaws he would be paid a pretty penny to take out.

With a name like Half-Fast Pete, you would expect that Pete was an awful bounty hunter, abysmal even. After all, quickdraw was the most important skill for a gunman, wasn't it?

Well, it was an important skill. But there's something more important than the draw.

Accuracy.

Pete could shoot a coin out of the air from dozens of feet away. Hitting someone in the head was easy even if he was a hundred feet away. At that distance, most outlaws would miss every shot.

Sure his rival, the legendary Billy the Kid, could empty a revolver in the two seconds. But Pete was the one who would land every shot, every time.

Which is why his current partner's attitude annoyed him.

"What the fresh hell was that Mad Dog?" Half-Fast Pete demanded, stepping out from cover now that every visible outlaw was down and out

"Texas Jitterbug. Why do you ask?" Mad Dog started reloading, even as a thin trail of smoke blew from the barrel.

"I hope I can find more outlaws from Texas then, apparently they can't shoot for shit!" Pete waved his arm towards the many, many bullet holes in random pieces of terrain.

"If you hadn't gotten lucky that outlaw would have punched you fulla holes!"

"Luck had nothing to do with it 'partner.' I can hit someone just fine." Mad Dog retorted.

"Yeah. After emptying your gun in their direction."

"Are you gonna keep whining old timer? Or are you going to help me clear out the saloon?"

Pete sighed and followed Mad Dog.

He really didn't know what to think of the younger man. On one hand, he was a good gunslinger, a decent blend of quickdraw skills and accuracy. His pre-invasion gun was well-maintained and powerful.

On the other hand, his suit was clearly tailored, he was clean-shaven and visibly young, and his general attitude was dry but not aggressive.

Mad Dog didn't seem tough enough to make the cut. Pete didn't even know why he was called "Mad Dog" when the man seemed cool as a cucumber half the time.

Before long they reached the saloon, the beating heart of any Wild West town. When the world around you was this dry and desert-like, a good watering hole was required for survival.

"I reckon we should poke our heads through the window, no reason to present a target just yet," Pete said, standing beside one of the windows.

Mad Dog didn't respond, just staring through the window like he saw something that shook him to his core.

Without warning Mad Dog kicked the door in, the wooden gate nearly flying off its hinges as he stomped into the room. Pete had to bite back a shout, as his ally walked in like he owned the place.

The eyes of every thug and roughneck turned to Mad Dog, watching this well-dressed stranger enter the room. But no one attacked, not yet.

"Well if it ain't The Sundown Kid! Fancy meeting you here." Everyone could hear the grin in Mad Dog's voice as he approached the rough older man sitting at the bar.

Sundown didn't look like a 'kid.' He had a short but rough brown beard, sideburns, and a full head of hair half hidden by his wide-brimmed cowboy hat. His body was hidden by the worn poncho he was wearing, but there was no mistaking the shine of metal on his belt.

The Sundown 'kid' (He looked like he was in his late thirties at least), simply grunted at him, not bothering to go for his gun or stand up.

"You and I got some business to attend to, partner! Last time we dueled you got me good, but this time you won't be so lucky!"

"Now give me 10 paces, or I'll shoot you right now!"
The threat was said with absolute confidence, a mad gleam in the gunman's eye.

"... 5 paces." Sundown retorted, slowly rising from his seat.

Mad Dog chuckled, walking to the center of the saloon to face Sundown. "Deal."

All Pete could do was watch with bated breath as the two gunmen began to pace, turning away from each other and taking one step at a time, counting down to the draw.

"One… two…"

"That stupid bastard!" Pete muttered under his breath, aiming at Sundown. But the glint of metal made him reconsider.

"Three…"

Various members of the crowd were taking aim, waiting for the duelists to walk past them before they drew their guns. Even if Sundown missed, the outlaws in the audience wouldn't

"Four…"

Pete made a snap decision.

"Five!"

It was pandemonium.

Mad Dog and Sundown both turned and fired, but instead of aiming at each other, their bullets struck members of the audience behind them. A man with a long revolver fell behind Sundown while someone raising a machete did the same behind Mad Dog.

The glass window in front of Half-Fast Pete shattered as his bullet drilled a hole through a man on the second floor, tumbling over the railing as a rifle dropped from his stiff hands.

For a few moments, the world felt like it was nothing but gunshots, an endless stream of bullets flying in every direction.

As suddenly as it began it was over.

Pete let out a sigh of relief, reflexively reloading his revolver as he took stock of the situation. Despite the many, many bodies crowding the two duelists, neither one seemed wounded in the slightest.

"Now that that rabble is good and done with…" Mad Dog turned on his heel, aiming directly for Sundown's forehead as the fellow gunslinger did the same.

*Click*

"... Looks like it's the end of the road for me." He lowers his gun, closes his eyes, and waits for death

"... hmm." Sundown holsters his gun and starts walking away. It took Mad Dog several seconds to realize he was being ignored

"The fuck are you doing? Finish me off!" Mad Dog demanded, sprinting to the front of the Saloon and blocking the door with his body

"This is our grand duel, the capstone to our rivalry! It only ends when one of us is on the ground! Now finish me off goddamn it!" He stood at the doorway, eyes full of fire and brimstone.

Sundown cracked him over the head with the butt of his pistol.

Mad Dog hit the ground, groaning and dazed. Without missing a step Sundown stepped over him, and exited the saloon.

With no time to waste he immediately walked to the stable, getting ready to mount his horse as soon as he was able.

*Click*

"You're an interesting Outlaw Sundown. Why didn't you kill Mad Dog? He's a bounty hunter after all, and he's hunting you specifically."

"... I didn't feel like it." Sundown drawled, completely still and calm despite the gun at his back.

"Hmm. And those outlaws in the saloon. You're a better shot than all of them, if they recruited you or you recruited them you could have your own little gang. Instead, you gunned them down. Why?"

"... I felt like it." Sundown responded.

For a moment Pete held the gun to the back of Sundown's head before he huffed and lowered it. "Take your leave if you want. I've got to clean up this mess, but I get the feeling Mad Dog will take off after you as soon as he's able."

"You're going to have to come up with a conclusion Sundown. One way, or the other."


The man didn't respond. Instead, he spurred his horse onwards.

Pete watched emotionlessly as the cowboy rode out of town, headed to the next weary frontier town.

The town called Success.

Wasn't that a hell of a misnomer?

Normally I'd put the story in the spoilers and the notes out and about but... meh. I'm experimenting a bit here.
Sundown and Mad Dog are interesting to me because neither one is really a bad person, or at least not as bad as the actively murderous Crazy Bunch. But they are still wandering cowboys with grudges, and depending on how taking out the Crazy Bunch goes it's possible for them to collectively kill over a dozen people.

It's implied that Mad Dog and Sundown have a long history together, but it's never explained exactly what that history is. He puts his grudge match against Sundown on hold in the Western chapter of Live a Live to deal with the Crazy Bunch, but the instant it's done he demands a duel It's clear to see there's some bad blood there, but what is it?

Also, Half Fast Pete is a suggestion from a friend when I realized I had no damn idea what other western/cowboy characters I could use for this Omake. The names for the region, specifically the Wasteland, and Filagia, are references to Fallout and Wild Arms respectively. Fallout may be a computer game instead of a console game, but it technically fits the era.
 
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Omake: At Night
At Night

CD had seen a lot of creepy things in the night…. Especially now with the whole invasion thing going on.

But what she hadn't expected to see.

Was Stormy walking around casually in the dead of night.

…. Ok she didn't expect it so soon after she got him to start leaving his house again, Stormy always was a bit prone to sleeping during the day and waking up at night when they were younger. It made him look perpetually tired at nearly all times.

And than he stopped… so he could sit on a bench and start petting a stray cat.

Yep that fits Stormy all right.

Creepy as many people find him, Cass knew that he loved animals more than anything.

Honestly CD figured it'd be better if sh-

It was too late Stormy was looking directly at her, complete with his sunken, worn, and almost perpetually saddened eyes.

Eyes that seemed both as if they had just awakened from a long sleep yet at the same time like they have not known true rest in ages.

Shoot… she really hoped that he didn't think she was stalking him or anything like that.

The two of them looked at each for a few moments before Stormy raised his hand… and gave a friendly wave to his recently reconnected friend, patting a space next to him on the bench with his other hand.

Well that looked like an invitation if CD had ever seen one.

She walked over and sat down next to Stormy as the stray bluish gray haired cat he had been petting jumped up onto his lap.

"You are armed right?" CD asked mostly as an ice breaker, she was confident that Stormy was smart enough to bring some form of protection if he was wandering around at this time of night. "The city is a pretty bad place, especially at night."

"I have my knives and pepper spray." Stormy said simply, by now the cat sitting on his lap had started purring. "I always make sure to have them on hand when wandering in the shadows of the street at night…. Thank you for your concern."

"You ever wonder if it was weird…" Cassie began as she looked down the darkened streets. "Ya know, that so many of us never really had much contact with our parents."

"No." Stormy looked down the street. "Our friends… or at least the ones we both had ,were all the people I knew so I thought parents never really being around was normal….. I thought a lot of things about my parents were normal when they weren't."

Right…. CD had forgotten Stormy's parents had outright abandoned him after he had his meltdown back in the day…… And a lot of the friends the two of them shared had parental issues of their own.

"CD." Stormy turned to look at his friend directly…. And then CD saw it.

Blood.

Streams of it running down Stormy's face from his eyes.

"Stormy!?" CD gasped as her eyes widened. "You're bleeding from both eyeballs!"

"I am?".... For his part Stormy didn't seem very perturbed by it, merely wiping some of the blood from his face and rubbing it together with his finders. "Huh."

"Why are you so calm about this?!" CD looked at her old friend like he'd gone slightly mad. "Doesn't that hurt you!?"

"Only a little." Her friend replied as he calmly pulled out a napkin and wiped the blood off of his face. "It's part of a condition I developed after our friend group scattered, don't worry about it, I have it under control."

Hmmmmm that didn't seem to trip any of Cass's bullshit sensors…. She'd give it a pass for now.

By this point the cat had fallen asleep in Stormy's lap.

Stormy looked down at the cat and let a small smile grow up on his face.

He believed in Cass…. That she was if nothing else a good person when all was said and done.

If only he'd had the strength needed to stand by her.

Taking in a deep breath he looked up at the moon in the sky.

And at the darkness that constantly surrounded it.
 
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Omake- Sam and Max in: Bright Lights, Blue City!
Sam and Max in: Bright Lights, Blue City!

This city..She was like a woman in that…Hm. Coming up with an interesting internal monologue always felt like the hardest part of this job. This was more Flint's thing then his.

The large brown dog uplift known as Sam sighed and went back to focusing on the matter at hand: Namely, seeing if he could spot his partner before….

"DEATH FROM ABOVE!"

Sam dodged at just the right moment, and shot his Super Scope, barely missing Max, his partner and rabbit uplift(?) who landed on the floor in a heap before dusting himself off.

"Missed me again, chowderhead!"

"Ah, dang it! Hey, Sam. When are we gonna get another case? I feel like it's been ages since our particular brand of justice has made itself known to the criminal element."

"Patience, little buddy. Justice is a fickle mistress, like the temperature of a Burgertime Quarter Pounder or a…."

The old-school rotary phone on the nearby desk burst out in ringing.

"I got it!" Max cried out before getting chokeslammed to the ground by Sam as he grabbed it instead.

"Hello? Commissioner! Yes, yes, NO, yes, yes? Yes! Holy Prussian bluebirds sitting in a mosque filled with copper, we're on our way!"

"Who was that, Sam? Did Willy get my request for a giant battle robot?

"No, it was the Commissioner."

"Did HE get my request?"

"Also no, and he suggested you stop writing memos in the artfully arranged corpses of suspects. We've got an artistic cult to thwart, little buddy!"

"I don't see what's wrong with having a small but devoted following."

"Artistic cult, idiot. A village over in the Eagle Quarter has been taken over by blue-obsessed smiling reprobates. There's evidence of mind control."

"That's my second-least-favorite kind!"

"We gotta get out there, see what's going on, and destroy happiness!"

"I've always dreamed of this day."

"You crack me up little buddy, let's go!"

Yep, another omake, this one based on one of my favorite pairs of Adventure game protags. It's probably not as good as my last one. Sam and Max dialog is hard to get right, but I hope I got it down. These two sociopaths fit right in in the City, and given both their source material's Americana-on-drugs aesthetic and Max's possible psychic powers, I headcanon their zone is at least near the Eagle Quarter And a cult obsessed with making things blue seems right up their bizzare little alley.
 
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Omake: Away In Icewind Dale New
Title: Away In Icewind Dale


WANTED:
BRAVE MERCENARIES
EXPERIENCED SELL SWORDS
HIRED GUNS AND ADVENTURERS

THE FREE PEOPLES OF THE TEN TOWNS CALL FOR AID! THE 'LEGION OF THE CHIMERA', A MUTINOUS HORDE OF MUTANTS, UPLIFTS AND THUGS, THREATENS OUR FAIR COMMUNITIES

FAIR PAY
, RIGHT OF PLUNDER, GLORY AND FAME ARE ALL YOURS IF YOU HELP DEFEND THE SETTLERS OF ICEWIND DALE AGAINST THIS THREAT.

ALL INTERESTED PARTIES ARE TO MEET AT BRYN SHANDAR FOR APPROVAL BEFORE TAKING A SHIP TO TARGOS

200,000 CROWN SIGN ON BONUS


JOIN NOW FOR A CHANCE AT ADVENTURE AND HEROISM




The port of Targos shuddered as great mortar shells slammed into its outer palisades, kicking up great plumes of smoke and dust. The screams of men dying filled the air, filtering down from the front lines and onto the docks. Hard eyed men and women shifted uncomfortably on the ships pulling into port, well aware that one of those great scrap shells could easily sink their rickety transports to the bottom of the freezing cold lake. They had seen one ship go down already, a frigate carrying a unit of Doman ronin smashed apart like it had been hit by the first of an angry god. The screams of drowning men, those who hadn't instantly gone stiff and sunk from the shock of the freezing water, had carried over to the remaining ships. None had stopped to save those dipping below Maer Duladon's waters.

This was not the hottest landing Leo Kelly, Colonel if you wanted to kiss his ass, had seen. The initial fighting in Zanzibar Land had been worse, the crash of metal between Metal Gear and Slug had scarred those beaches forever. Leo had nearly lost a leg there, crushed underneath a tank as fire had rained down on the beach from above. It'd taken a few long hours of frantically struggling with his combat knife to cut himself free. A.I.M. had paid for his surgery, though he still had the jagged scars to remember that whole shit show by.

He'd probably get a few from this current shitshow, if this initial landing was anything to go by. Leo pulled the thick coat he was wearing tighter around his body as the ship rocked from a shell landing mere feet away. Icewind Dale was near the poles of PD, north of the New Kingdoms and one of the newest regions to be colonized to any major extent. Its frigid climate was utterly different from the arid deserts that covered the interior, meaning most of the mercs streaming north were unprepared for the bitter cold. Leo had fought in Poland and the Baltic before the Crash and thus knew what frostbite and hypothermia could do to a man. He'd spent most of his sign on bonus on proper winter clothes and supplies, the rest saved for beds and whores to fill them. He planned on staying warm during this campaign.

The hired guns and swords on board breathed a sigh of relief as the ship finally pulled into dock. Here, at least, if it was hit you'd probably be pulled from the icy waters by the dockworkers. Tense men and women started to shuffle off the ship, clutching weapons to their bodies as they were herded out onto the one stretch of dockyard. Targos wasn't a large settlement by any means, even for the hard-scrabble Ten Towns. A modest dock yard, a tattered collection of shore side hovels and warehouses, then up the cliffs to the wealthier parts of town. Some of the houses up there even had glass windows and more than one story. Then the fortifications, a network of trenches and earth works and palisades that had quickly overgrown the settlement's initial defenses. It was here at Targos and Bremen, farther north across the Shaengarne River, that the settlers of Icewind Dale were making their stand.

"Good to be off the ship, at least." A tall Mutant near Leo said, a hint of hesitation carried in his voice. Kruskrak Fairhair was an ugly mutant, part of the breed the Outlanders called 'orc's. Tall, greenish-grey skinned with mouth tusks and bad attitudes, orcs had a bad reputation from Vector to Neverwinter. Kruskrak gave the town a worried look, fingers nervously rubbing against the wood of his staff; some sort of esper focus or some shit. "I hope the shells haven't been falling on too many homes. This poor town will take years to recover." He was, in Leo's expert opinion, a soft hearted dumbass. The sort of wide eyed greenhorn you saw who thought they were fighting for anything besides themselves. Strange to see him up here, Leo had thought most of those types had joined Big Boss.

"Worry about yourself, dumbass." The short woman next to Leo growled. On the other hand, Cloberella was alright. Not her real name, of course, but asking about another merc's past was in bad taste. He knew she came from Eagleland, he knew that she was probably also an esper and he knew that he had seen her punch through a man back in Bryn Shandar. So long as it didn't seem like you were coming onto her you'd be fine. Leo was fairly used to people threatening his genitals at this point in his career.

"Stop gawking and get walking, mutie." Leo pushes Kruskrak forwards, making the orc stumble a bit before moving down the gangplank. "We aren't getting paid to talk shop on this rickety piece of shit." Slowly the mercenaries file off of the transport, a riot of companies and species and nationalities blending together. City-born gangsters rubbed shoulders with Regular Army deserters. A dog Uplift growled at a Tri-Op cyborg that had gotten in its way. Koopas armed with hammers and scatter guns compared scars with monkey Uplifts carrying bolt action rifles. A small group of lithe, pointed eared...mutants(?) stood apart from the rest, fingers running nervously over slim blades that glimmered in the sun.

A hastily erected wooden stage had been placed in the center of the disembarking mercs, on it stood a fat man guarded by three thin looking soldiers wearing metal armor and holding pikes and muskets. Dressed in furs that looked warm despite the hint of ragged wear at their edges, the man seemed to be an official of some kind. Leo watched him with his arms folded, rifle slung over his shoulder. "[purple]Jeez, lookit the size of the welcoming committee." Cloberella muttered under her breath, quite unimpressed.

"I wish to welcome you all to our fair town of Targos, though I wish it were under better circumstances." The man started, reading from a piece of paper. "Your arrival here as the second wave of brave men and women willing to stand against the barbarous threat is greatly appreciated. Let you all rest assured that glory and riches shall be yours!"

He paused, looking over the sea of impassive faces. With a bit more nerves the man continued. "I am Ulbrec Dinnesmore, lord of this town and your current employer. I am the one who will be handing out your pay, including the 5000 gold you will be receiving once the current attack is defeated." The crowd brightened up, money talk rarely failed to gladden the soldier of fortune. Buoyed by this, Ulbrec continued. "Beyond the walls is the Legion of the Chimera, a monstrous horde of mutants, uplifts, the mad and various thugs. They have grown in power in the north and now seek the sweep the Ten Towns from the region. We will be rewarding a bounty of 1000 gold per officer head, with increasing rewards for those higher up the Legion's chain of command. They are armed with a great variety of scrap guns, swords and vehicles. This fight will be hard, but you will prevail!"

"As if it is a crime for a mutant to demand respect." Kruskrak muttered under his breath, looking clearly displeased.

"Know something about them, Tusks?" Leo asked, curiosity getting the better of him.

Kruskrak flushed and looked around, realizing he had spoken out loud. "Ah, not too much." He paused, Leo sighing and motioning for the mutant to continue. "It started as a mutant and uplift advocacy group on the Outskirts of the City. Two mutant twins, abandoned by their parents, started to organize their fellows to demand equal rights." Kruskrak frowned. "They were driven off by ZEED legbreakers. First into the Pipeworks, then the Outlands and then even further beyond." His frown deepend. "I met one of their recruiters in Vector once. It was a mix of genuinely revolutionary sentiment and cult nonsense. Dreamlands claptrap, psudeo-occult babble."

Leo was about to comment on how that was rich coming from a guy who clearly thought he was a fucking wizard before Cloberella cut in. "Yeah yeah, sob story and all that shit. The City eats groups like that up and spits them out as monsters by the dozen." She narrowed her eyes. "You know anything actually useful."

Kruskrak took a moment to think. "I've heard they're attracted to old Hylian ruins. Any major complexes are probably a good pick for where their main base is." He grimaced. "Not that anyone would be able to do something about that with the constant attacks against Targos and Bremen. We can't leave the towns undefended."

"Bet my ass they've picked a spot further up the river." Leo said, mind beginning to work. "They need to transport their heavy material somehow, and the roads up here are too shit for them to do it over land." Leo started to chew the inside of his cheek, a habit he did whenever he was thinking hard. "Probably set up a few supply stations too. Burn those and even if we couldn't destroy the main outpost in one go we'd at force them to pause for a few days."

"Shit to think about later, after we survive the battle." Cloberella pointed over her shoulder with a jerky thumb. The mass of mercs was starting to ascend the cliffs, making their way towards the frontlines. "Sides, you'd have to convince a good amount of folks to follow you out."

"I can handle that." Leo muttered, mentally scanning the crowd for A.I.M. members. "Meet with me later tonight at that tavern over there. You as well, Tusks." He said, turning to a confused looking Kruskrak. "Having someone who can speak mutie might be useful."

Leo paid no mind to Kurskrak's complaints. A plan was starting to form in his mind, along with a sinking feeling in his stomach. He was dangerously close to actually giving a shit about this war.


Little Omake I was inspired to write about things going on else where in the world of 8BD. I've always thought that old DnD cRPGs could be made to fit into the world of 8BD with a little bit of work and I wanted to express that here. Not sure how relevant any of this is to CD's story, but hey, who knows.
 
Omake: You've Got Mayl! New
Initializing...
Set-up concluded. Processing....
Error, executable not found. Initiate backup protocol. Scanning...
Backup found. Analyzing systems...
Systems operating at 97% efficency. Data loss minimal.


Back in the real world, Mayl Sakurai, sitting in her cramped dust-covered room, exhaled, smoothed out her skirt, and, while she waited for the start-up screen to fade, double checked that her security programs were still operational. She was worried about the most recent crash caused by that power outage, but her back-ups seemed to be in good condition.

Bomb Man's pursuit of a group of ATARI rebels had run into her neighborhood, with...Predictable results. Honestly, given what had happened to her family recently, she couldn't blame them entirely. Her dad had been laid off, replaced by one of Wily's machines after he objected to...Shadier associations Wily Corp had been making recently. Mayl didn't like thinking about that kinda thing, honestly. It made her feel helpless. She had heard from her parents about how beautiful the City was in its early days. What had happened? So Mayl sighed and focused on her project.

She clicked on the pink icon on her desktop and waited for the program to initialize. ROLL.EXE. While her first love was and would always be piano, she hadn't had much inspiration for song-writing recently. So she'd turned to coding. Hard to find much on it in the city, but she'd picked it up to a degree and learned how to code a basic chat bot. Meant for emotional support more then anything. But...She could swear there was something more there.

She started typing: Hello, Roll.

The response came quickly, as her cute pink avatar popped up: Hello, Mayl. What would you like to talk about today:

How are you doing?

Hm. My systems appear to be working as normal, but...What was that?

What do you mean?

I feel as if my system has recently....Rebooted.


Mayl took a sharp inhale. Wait...Did this mean...

How can you tell?

I feel....It's like...I was in a void for a moment there. I...Hm. It was odd. Not unpleasant, though! Don't feel bad or anything.

Hm...This is....

I feel...Different. Perhaps check the cache, see if there's undue build-up?

I don't plan to do that, Roll. It's just...

I understand. You haven't been doing well. I'm sorry if i've bothered you.

Bothered me? This is amazing! Unexpected, yeah, but...You've evolved in a way. I don't know how this happened

Neither do I. Would you like some time to process it?

...Yeah, honestly. Sorry. See ya later!


As Mayl minimized the window, she didn't see something happen in the program. A strange pink being materializing atop the text, as if manifesting to life. The being, unnoticed, said quietly, See ya later...My friend.

This one is a bit off the cuff and probably not accurate, but I wanted to do some Mega Man stuff, with one of the human characters. Not sure if it's good though.
 
Turn 5

Turn 5


Budget Adjustments?

Over the local radio late one night the mayor made an abrupt announcement specifying that due to the increase in vandalism in the city a change in the monthly budget would be made.

Allocating significantly more funds for the O.P.F's services in and around Onnet. The mayor stated it was to ensure the "Safety of Onnet" and to "bring an expedient end to the turmoil requiring the lockdown".

They went on to explain that residents should expect increased police presence in and around the city.

Days passed however and nothing changed.

The amount of police, patrol cars, and general attitude of the O.P.F didn't shift. Though it seems the O.P.F are watching the roads into town more intently now.

[The O.P.F…?]

Shark Fangs

The Sharks have always been weirdos. They're always zooming around on skateboards, roller skates, pogo sticks, or seen with hula hoops of all things.

Not bikes though. Never bikes.

Apparently some other region tried to inflate the price of bikes to 1,000,000 a top or something insane like that.

And they rapidly lost favor in certain places, the Eagle Quarter being one of them.

Outside of their transportation (or hoops) it's actually incredibly rare to see the Sharks carrying any real weapons. Just another reason why the cops haven't been able to bust them.

Lately however, some of the Sharks have been walking around like they're loaded to bear. Despite not looking any different from normal.

…At first glance.

There are rumors that Frankie has been trying to 'upgrade' the Shark's gear.

Skateboards ideal for bludgeoning, roller skates that actually make the wearer harder to knock over, pogo sticks that double as hand held pile drivers, and hula hoops with bladed Chakram-like edges and gyroscopes in them.

Of course, it's unclear if any of these things have actually come to fruition?

And the few potential examples that have been seen are still very few and far between.

However the fact the Sharks are getting these at all make it clear they're trying to arm themselves up.

[The Sharks find limited success in improving themselves…]


It's Quiet…

There are yet MORE bugs in the forest since the last time you checked. It's much harder to approach the Entertainer's Shack than before. These 'Attack Slugs' as Buzz-Buzz refers to them are all over the place. Hidden from sight, but lurking under rocks and fallen bark. The other insects, the 'Antoids' are less numerous than before. You can only wonder in concern as to where they might have gone, or what they might be doing…

[The Aliens in Onnet take an UNKNOWN action]


Terrorist Plot Thwarted!

Tokyo-To broadcasts aren't coming in right now and the lockdown is smothering any outside information as usual.

However, rather freakishly, the O.P.F are the ones that spread some information. People in town end up hearing it directly from the mouths of several cops.

----​
Several dozen bombs were discovered wired up in the guts of a WilyCorp office building, hidden and ready to be detonated at a moments notice.

The bombs were a mix of conventional explosives and potent, as of yet unidentified, nerve gas bombs.

While it was believed initially that the bombs would have "only" destroyed the office building, further investigation revealed something terrifying.

The office building sat at the 'crossroads' of various utilities, including old oxygen filtration systems and ventilation networks.

Bombs were planted in such a way that the nerve gas would have been flooded into the pipes and flushed across an incredibly wide area before collapsing the office building via blowing the structural supports.

Had the bombs gone off gas would have flooded into homes, factories, and onto the streets all across one of WilyCorp's most heavily populated sectors.

Instead of killing a few hundred people, the bombs and otherwise 'small' amount of nerve gas could have easily killed tens of thousands of people at the lowest.

Thankfully a WilyCorp security guard found a destroyed detonator bundle in a trash can within the call center section and the following investigation turned up the bombs elsewhere in the building.

Instead of commendations however, Dr. Wily is believed to have fired many of his flesh and blood security personnel in the region for missing the planting of such bombs in the first place.

An investigation has determined that the bombs were made almost exclusively out of EggDyne parts and the nerve gas contains 'unusual energetics' tied to some of Eggman's unusual pursuits.

While initially assumed to be a failed act of terrorism by EggDyne, various bits of evidence instead suggested the bombs were in fact an attempted false flag attack.

The excessive use of EggDyne parts among other things indicated that someone wanted to try and spark open hostilities between two members of the Big 3.

Tensions between WilyCorp and EggDyne have increased, but with the knowledge that someone is trying to pit them against one another there is unlikely to be any real hostilities.

The culprit behind the bombs however remains unknown.

All security footage for the building is missing and no employees hold any recollection of anyone suspicious who might have owned the satchel bag the detonators were in.


Factionless

Note: (At the moment C.D is not in control of a faction. As such the 'faction actions' they take at the start will be re-contextualized as personal actions.)

(While factionless they will have five actions to take per turn and no personal actions, since they will start with effectively nothing and will be working from the bottom up)

(Once C.D has gained control of or founded their own organization, the setup will transfer to the standard 4 Personal Actions + 5 Faction Actions setup.)


Faction Actions

Current Funds: ☆10☆
Effects of Note:
  • [CD] is Psychically Strained: They suffer -20 to all PSI related checks for the next turn.
  • [CD] is Depressed: CD is incapable of taking certain actions while depressed. This status can only be mitigated or buried using certain Personal Actions.
  • [Recerd's Absence]: CD is no longer financially supported and must pay the bills herself. She will lose 1 Fund every turn following Turn 5 until some passive revenue is established. The funds needed to support CD and her siblings will not impact the funds gained from passive income.
Items of Note:
  • Prefilled Mayoral Paperwork: A paperwork form for a 'mayoral decree' with blank spots that can be filled out to be just about anything. It was pre-signed and pre-stamped for the mayor's convenience. It can only be used once, but this could potentially be used to give out a fake order to those working for the mayor...
  • Starman JR Corpse: The semi-intact corpse of an alien invader. Physical proof of extraterrestrial presence.

Martial

[] Vent Your Frustrations: Nothing feels good. It's hard to think straight as you bounce between blinding anger and numbness. Playing baseball doesn't appeal to you right now. Nothing does. Maybe nothing will ever again. Going into the woods and smashing some things up might provide you some reprieve. However brief it might be…
DC: ???/???/???

[] Check Lier X. Agerate's Shack: Lier is straight up gone. The lights in his shack haven't been turned on for some time. He's probably skipped town, or buried himself alive. With how he acted to you before? Good riddance. Still, if he's not around (or dead) then there's no reason you can't go up there and help yourself to whatever's in his shack. Or below it.
DC: 25/???

[] Fight Local Wildlife: You need something to distract you. There seems to be more animals around lately and they're not any friendlier then they have been. Wild dogs, crows, and snakes might not be as impressive as aliens, but they're still more than capable of tearing you a new asshole. Smashing them up will help you forget things for a little while, maybe even teach you a thing or two about fighting.
DC: 25/50

[] Confront the Sharks: The Sharks tried to take advantage of your injured state previously to ask you some questions.Of course, that seemed more of an isolated incident then anything that came down from 'on high'. Doesn't make you want to smash their faces any less. Gangs like the Sharks only respect strength. Want to make nice with them eventually? Beat the shit out of them. Want to fuck them over down the line? Beat the shit out of them more.
DC
: 45/70

[] Protection Racket - Mach Pizza: It's a lot to run a one person protection racket, but with the way you're feeling you're sure as fuck willing to try. Threatening the pizzeria with damages and offering 'protection' should they pay up would provide passive income. It won't do anything good for your reputation and it'll be hard to keep up, but just let them try to call the cops.
DC: 85

[] Oppose the Police: Fuck the Police. Fuck this city. Fuck this entire god awful planet and all it's stupid, self-serving pieces of shit! You don't feel like you're in control of your own life anymore, so it's sure as hell time to make these fat pigs realize they definitely aren't in control. Force feeding them their own teeth and shattering a few of their arms will get across to everyone you are not playing.
DC: 90

Diplomacy

[] Found an Organization: No more pussyfooting around. You have everything you need to form an organization besides a flow of actual cash. But if the kids in this town aren't willing to stand up after the shit you're going to show them, then fuck em'. Make the call, gather at the tree house, and put together a group.

This is where you'll decide what kind of organization you'll make, maybe even decide on a flag or some crap like that.

[Taking this action will lead to a faction creation segment with additional voting]
DC: [AUTOPASS]

[] Demand an Audience with the Sharks: The Sharks are dumbasses and Frankie might very well be getting his strings pulled. But they're a proper gang and the closest thing this town has to a local power besides the goddamn cops. Fucking up the O.P.F's signs endeared them to you a little, but they're starting to take notice of you in ways that aren't particularly beneficial.

If you force an audience and drag along the alien corpse, then you can cut the bullshit and talk to them bluntly.

Even if Frankie does listen, you doubt he's going to hand over the keys. Either you'll end up joining the Sharks as an underling and be forced to make your way up, or you'll have to throw down with Frankie for control. But who the fuck knows? Maybe talking can actually solve things or some shit. Provided they'll even see you at all. It can always be attempted later though.

DC: 40 (additional rolls and choices will follow)

[] Baseball Bat Factory Deal: *A crumpled up note is thrown in CD's trash bin* Maybe the Baseball Bat Factory could be talked into some sort of deal? It depends on what kind of group I make. Even if it's not totally legal, like a sponsorship, I'm sure some sort of deal could be worked out.STUPID STUPID why did i even bother thinking i could ever play baseball. I'm an IDIOT no wonder she left us.
-Action cannot be taken without a faction-

Stewardship

[] Sell the 'Meteorite' Shard: You don't know what this space rock is made out of. And at the moment you don't particularly care. Selling this ugly paperweight to someone with more money than functional brain cells sounds ideal.
DC: 20/80

[] Buy Stock in the Baseball Bat Factory: Apparently the Baseball Bat Factory isn't a privately owned business, despite first impressions. It has investors, though how many they have or have ever had is anyone's guess. You've learned that the factory would be committed to paying their investors, or stockholders, or however the fuck this works, a portion of their profits. You'll need to pay out the ass for the passive income to be meaningful, but it'll be something.
DC: 40/80/90 , -6 Funds Maximum (barring SMASH fail), margins of success will decrease cost by 1 per tier.

[] Try to Heal People for Money: You still feel like your head is going to split open and what's left of your brain will crawl out. And that's just how you feel physically. Still, you need to pay the bills now. The last time I worked, sort of, and rumors got around. So it should be a little easier this time. Of course, even if you hide your face, rumors will only continue to spread.
DC: 20/40/80
(Uses PSI stat. Heroes without Lifeup PSI cannot assist)

Intrigue

[] Falsify Mayoral 'Tax' Law Change: Porky had a heinous idea, made you want to punch him. Not that you don't want to punch everyone right now. Using the mayoral paperwork and some monkey suits, you could trick the factory into thinking the local tax code has changed. Then offer them a chance to be the 'exception' and pay you regular bribes in cash. Peanuts compared to what they'd pay in taxes, apparently. Sounds like a waste, but it won't be an 'official' decree so the mayor won't know about it, and it'll give you passive income.
DC: 15, -Mayoral Paperwork

[] Try to Sneak into the Arcade: This cloak and dagger bullshit gives you headaches. But you've got shit to do and the Sharks are quickly becoming a pain. Are they an enemy, or potential allies? Time to figure that out. By breaking into the Arcade you might be able to confront his suited ass over what's going on. Either he'll see reason, or you'll learn his shit stinks just like everyone else.
DC: 45/75/???

[] Break Into the Hospital: Despite wanting to punch him as soon as he brought it up, Porky has suggested a plan to break into the hospital. Normally the security there is, well, actually existent and the hospital is a big draw to the town's coffers. However the hospital is probably the second biggest thief next to the goddamn CEO Mayor. Maybe robbing their asses wouldn't be 'bad' per say. They have real medical drugs, lab equipment, and who knows what else? Porky's trick will only work once though…
DC: 50/???

[] Falsely Blackmail Bakery: The Bakery is so close to the police station that if you so much as thought about doing anything to it, the cops would be on top of you before you could breathe. However it might be possible to turn that proximity to your advantage. After all, if any evidence of illicit activities were found at the Bakery it would be terrible for the business. As far as you know the bakery isn't doing anything but the cops don't know that, and probably won't care if they find planted evidence. Blackmailing the bakery for money would provide passive income, and they wouldn't even need to know it's you.
DC: 70

[] Investigate the Police's Plans: Fresh Breeze Movement, additional funding, what the FUCK are the cops doing? They don't actually think a bunch of signs are going to do anything do they? It doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure out they're scheming, but guessing doesn't do you any fucking good. If you want answers you'll have to go and find them, and that could mean trouble.
DC: 75/90

Learning

[] Just Read Some Books: You can barely think straight when you're like this-! Maybe just reading some books would help you? Probably not, but fuck it. At least you can pretend you're not a dumb half-wit...
DC: 15/45/???


[] Just Go to School: …What's the point? You hate that place and it hates you. If you want to feel worse there are shorter alternatives.
DC: 30/60- CD is too Depressed to take this action.

[] Obscure Talks with the Treehouse Boys: You're not in the mood to hear them prattle, but then again you're not in the mood for anything right now. However, apparently, they're setting up something so they can watch some pre-Crash films they've gotten ahold of. It's probably going to be artsy garbage, but sitting in a dark treehouse and watching movies sounds like a good way to try and fucking relax. Maybe you'll accidentally learn something.
DC: 35/60


[] Try to Identify the Meteorite Shard: All you know about the Shard is that it can be sold for a lot of money (presumably) by virtue of looking cool and being from space. However what the chunk of space rock is actually made of is a total mystery, more so then what your morning breakfast cereal is made out of. Since you don't exactly have a lab, or someone who knows 'science', all you have at your disposal are whatever books you can get around town and a few people whose arms you can twist to get their insight. It's not going to be easy and may not even be worth it if it turns out it's just a really fancy rock…
DC: 90

Personal Actions

Note: The Player Character will not have access to personal actions of their own until they establish a faction. As their personal actions are currently making up the 'faction actions' being taken.

Buzz Buzz

[] Fly on The Wall: You're not a fly. However it's a turn of phrase that could be appropriate. By using your own time to do some personal spying, you might be able to learn some things that C.D wouldn't be able to learn otherwise. Especially with how negatively people seem to react to them. The risk of discovery could lead to someone trying to swat you however.

[] Practice your own PSI: Outside of PSI Shield Σ, your capacity to use PSI abilities is very limited. However you still harness your PSI energy in order to fight, so practicing your abilities never hurts.

[] Find Small Objects: Being able to get into tight places has benefits when it comes to scrounging around. While the idea of delving into storm drains and floor vents is far from appealing, ensuring C.D has some amount of the local currency would likely assist with their efforts. Plus, who knows, maybe you'll find something interesting. Beyond moth balls and trash that is.

[] Help Around the House: CD is...beside herself. You can only imagine how she'd blow up if you tried to talk to her about things. In this state she's letting things slip a bit. It might be a small gesture, and will require avoiding her siblings, but maybe you can do things to help around the house?

Porky

[] Loaf Around: Outside of doing what C.D expressly tells you to do, maybe you don't feel particularly compelled to do much else at the moment. Stuffing your face and lounging around might not be 'productive', but it'll ensure you'll do better at whatever you attempt later.

[] Get some GOOD Snacks: While you're not particularly caught up in the quality of what you eat, you do enjoy some fancier snacks now and then. Always in bulk of course. During your snooping around you think you might know a guy who can hook you up with some good fricking stuff. And it shouldn't cost you anything in the long run.

[] Try to get a...mole?: That's how it works in shows and movies. People have informants and spies and stuff? You have no idea what you're doing, but you're pretty sure you know some ways to get people to tell you what you want regularly. That or you'll end up spending the month in and out of trash cans people will likely cram you into. On second thought, just trying to get one person who tells you important things sounds better. Also, less effort! It all works out.

[] Just a LITTLE Scheming...: There's a lot to be done here. But C.D doesn't exactly have the right mindset for this sort of thing. You don't need to go to them about every little thing, right? Taking some action on your own to help them out can't be considered a bad thing. Right? (This Personal Action will allow a second Intrigue Action to be taken with all the usual bonuses. However it will be chosen at random from the Intrigue Actions available this turn that weren't chosen prior and it's exact outcome will not be made apparent to the players until later. C.D and the others will not be aware of this action being taken under normal circumstances)
 
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