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Fire Emblem: Last of the Manakete

What would readers prefer?

  • Pure narrative quest: no dice will be used, the author will have free reign to decide what happens.

    Votes: 25 59.5%

  • New dice system: the author will design a new, better dice system to add some randomness and risk.

    Votes: 17 40.5%
  • Total voters
    42
  • Poll closed .
Reader mode
[X] You can't help but understand. For all her flightiness, Melissa clearly cares deeply about people, as does Sister Selinda. "I will not tell on you, so long as you swear to never, ever go behind my back again." You really hope Mother Marina never finds out about this, since she will be furious. However, this will mean that you'll be able to keep Melissa around for now, and she'll owe you a favor.
-[X] Ask your friends on their thoughts on what they think you should do later.

Open to a write-in but I really don't want to send her away for helping.
 
SoaringHawk218 said:
"What good is victory if it breaks the ones who wins it?"
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Either "ones" should be "one" or "wins" should be "win".

SoaringHawk218 said:
As you pulled the blanket Mother had left for you over your head, you found your mind drifting back to those many frantic minutes of dragon-form flying and fighting.
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Why is this sentence in past-tense?

SoaringHawk218 said:
Belle looks up from where she's tenderly polishing her new sword (you're starting to think she loves that thing a little too much…)
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Missing the punctuation after the parenthesis.

SoaringHawk218 said:
a flicker of worry fanning within your other self before you can fully channel it away..
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There's an extra period here.

SoaringHawk218 said:
"…alright," Kelton says, patting you on the head. "Alright, we'll let Lady Cartese know where you're going in case something comes up, but hopefully we did enough damage last night that the Imps won't be able to try anything."
Nodding, you close your bag and heft it onto your back, feeling a bit pleased with yourself that it's not as hard as it was when you first started carrying it around. "I hope so too," you say. "I hope they take what I said to heart and just go away so this can all be over."
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These paragraphs are not properly separated.

SoaringHawk218 said:
You do hear some shouts and cries as you finally lift off and make your way towards the hopefully private spot, but since none of them are people you know you are able to pretend you don't
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There should be a comma after "know".

SoaringHawk218 said:
Lean back against the rock, you sit quietly, letting the flow of the stream slide against your feet and calves, washing away the ache.
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"Leaning"

SoaringHawk218 said:
'I think we're doing really well!' your dragon says, picking up on a tiny flicker of irritation and spinning it into herself.
You nod. 'True, but we have had a few snags. Let's see what the elders have to say.'
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These paragraphs are not separated properly.

SoaringHawk218 said:
Rolling your eyes you "bop" yourself.
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There should be a comma after "eyes".

SoaringHawk218 said:
It makes sense, how often had your dragon whined about how unfair it was that you got to be in charge most of the time.
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"It makes sense" feels like it should be a sentence in and of itself, with the rest being another sentence. Also, that period should be a question mark.

SoaringHawk218 said:
While it was necessary, since she does tend to act first without thinking about whether you've missed some human social cue (such as when she'd zapped that poor Imperial Kelton'd hurt who you could have saved…)
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Missing punctuation after the parenthesis.

SoaringHawk218 said:
with several big ballistas mounted on towers sticking out of the makeshift wall around the Kingdoms camp.
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Missing an apostrophe, but I'm not sure if it should be before or after the "s".

SoaringHawk218 said:
You find the pair soon enough, standing off to one side of a main pathway as they talk to each other. You frown slightly as you see how tense Artemis's stance is, slowing your steps and closing your mouth before you call out to her.
"-still have my doubts," the man is saying, the feather in his big hat bouncing as he looks down at your smaller friend.
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These paragraphs are not separated properly.

SoaringHawk218 said:
Once she's done, Artemis comes over and sits on the sleeping mat, running a brush through her long hair. "So, what do you want to know?" she asks.

You consider for a moment before shrugging. "Well, at the start, I guess," you say,
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The dialogue here feels mismatched. Ryza's line sounds like a response to something like "where should I start?" or "where do you want me to start?", not "what do you want to know?".

SoaringHawk218 said:
I decided then and there that I wanted to be an archer girl."

"And you did," you say.
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Again, the dialogue feels mismatched. Ryza's line sounds like a response to Artemis saying she wanted to become an archer girl, not that she wanted to be one.

SoaringHawk218 said:
though part of that was her hair absolutely would never lie flat.
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Pretty sure this should be "would absolutely".

SoaringHawk218 said:
"This sort of healing and recovering system is the Divine Realm and Northern Kingdom's greatest strength,
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This should be pluralized.
 
[X] You can't help but understand. For all her flightiness, Melissa clearly cares deeply about people, as does Sister Selinda. "I will not tell on you, so long as you swear to never, ever go behind my back again." You really hope Mother Marina never finds out about this, since she will be furious. However, this will mean that you'll be able to keep Melissa around for now, and she'll owe you a favor.

I want to go with either this or the write-in compromise. If this were us, we probably wouldn't have been able to just sit in the back either. Of course, this isn't us, this is someone we're responsible for who is also much squishier. It's not quite the same. But I can't help but want to keep her around. And a little youthful indiscretion is probably good for her anyway.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.

Actions have consequences; welcome to the real world. If you think the necessity of the action is worth the cost, fine, that's your call to make. But feeling--or even being--righteous certainly doesn't mean you're immune from that cost. Besides, who knows what stunt she'll pull next just because she's sure she's right. I'm not willing to break Ryza's given word for this.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.
-[X] Ask your friends on their thoughts on what they think you should do later.
 
[X] You can't help but understand. For all her flightiness, Melissa clearly cares deeply about people, as does Sister Selinda. "I will not tell on you, so long as you swear to never, ever go behind my back again." You really hope Mother Marina never finds out about this, since she will be furious.However, this will mean that you'll be able to keep Melissa around for now, and she'll owe you a favor.

I can certainly understand people's worries that this is just the start, and that she could do worse later by following her own thoughts on what's right, and I can also understand Calico's suggestion, that saving those lives may have been the right call, but avoiding the consequences of her actions wouldn't be.

This also damages our word, an incredibly important resource that could have consequences down the line, still even with all of that being said, I just can't get behind the feeling that it would feel as if I was selling her out.

So I'll vote for understanding, even if I don't think sending her away is the incorrect decision.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.

How much is our word worth?

The only reason that we were allowed to bring Melissa along with us on this campaign is that we promised to keep her away from the fighting. We tried to do that, but she went around behind our backs explicitly against the agreement that we had made with her mother. She made what she felt was the right choice and that's fine, but don't make it worse. Don't compound the problem by trying to hide this from her mother.

What do you think are the odds that they manage to keep this from her mother? Melissa couldn't keep us from finding out in the first conversation that we had with her after the incident. If and when her mother finds out that we kept this from her, what does that mean for us? For Artemis and the alliance? We're the head mage of Agrithe after all. The consequences of us trying to sweep this under the rug don't necessarily all fall on us.

We can agree that what she did to help save peoples lives was an objectively good thing and still inform her mother about what happened.
 
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[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.

Besides the obvious arguments, this also feels like a "sacrifice a Troubadour now for a Valkyrie later" option, and, well, you know what they say about bases and growths…
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.

I'll be deeply sad if this hurts the budding friendship, but in feudalism, politics are personal. We can't put our potential alliance with the Divine realm at worse odds by being known as someone who doesn't keep her word.
Also, I like characters who keep their promises even when it's hard.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.
 
[X] You can't help but understand. For all her flightiness, Melissa clearly cares deeply about people, as does Sister Selinda. "I will not tell on you, so long as you swear to never, ever go behind my back again." You really hope Mother Marina never finds out about this, since she will be furious. However, this will mean that you'll be able to keep Melissa around for now, and she'll owe you a favor.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.
 
[X] You can't help but understand. For all her flightiness, Melissa clearly cares deeply about people, as does Sister Selinda. "I will not tell on you, so long as you swear to never, ever go behind my back again." You really hope Mother Marina never finds out about this, since she will be furious. However, this will mean that you'll be able to keep Melissa around for now, and she'll owe you a favor.
 
TFTC. Actions have consequences, she could have talked to us and we could have found a way. Yet she chose to go over our back. The choices are either become a liar or do the right thing. I choose the moral choice.

[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.

I get it, she helped a bunch. But it's important we are seen as very trustworthy as we are trying to sway people away from thinking manakete are monsters. Further, this is a war. Following orders is important.
 
OK, had a thought. Sister Selinda did just say she bears responsibilty - perhaps we could leverage that a little? If nothing else it might help Melissa get 'off the hook' to have a responsible adult in the room explaining her decision making in an ethical fashion. I think she has some investment in how Mother Marina treats Melissa at this stage so she shouldn't be opposed to it.

I'm not 100% on this myself so I'm not making a write-in on this idea just yet but I'd like feedback on the idea, because this could be a valid third path. Would suck for her, though, and might create a weird political knot. For now, and against something I said earlier, my vote:

[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.
-[X] Ask your friends on their thoughts on what they think you should do later.
 
[X] You can't help but understand. For all her flightiness, Melissa clearly cares deeply about people, as does Sister Selinda. "I will not tell on you, so long as you swear to never, ever go behind my back again." You really hope Mother Marina never finds out about this, since she will be furious. However, this will mean that you'll be able to keep Melissa around for now, and she'll owe you a favor.
-[X] Ask your friends on their thoughts on what they think you should do later.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.
 
[X] You gave your word. You promised Mother Marina you'd follow certain rules, and Melissa had broken those rules. You'll have to report to her what happened right away, which will almost certainly mean that Melissa won't be allowed to stay. However, from what you've seen of the woman, you're pretty sure that the Knight Corona will accept that you did your best, so she shouldn't be upset with you.
 
[X] You can't help but understand. For all her flightiness, Melissa clearly cares deeply about people, as does Sister Selinda. "I will not tell on you, so long as you swear to never, ever go behind my back again." You really hope Mother Marina never finds out about this, since she will be furious. However, this will mean that you'll be able to keep Melissa around for now, and she'll owe you a favor.
-[X] Ask your friends on their thoughts on what they think you should do later.
 
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