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Trails of Tera Steel (Kiseki-inspired Pokemon Academy Quest)

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I took it as a flash-forward, really. A sidestory of something that hasn't happened yet, but will in the future unless we as voters manage to derail the entire plot (and really, nothing in here is really within Mariana's ability or knowledge to affect, at least to the point where the events change rather than their context.)

It's definitely more focused on adapting the plot of the Scarlet and Violet games into this new reality than any other aspect of the crossover, but not everything has to be an equal distribution of Pokémon, Kiseki, and whatever the fuck Arvis is doing with WTC and Project Moon and his other asides. It's a focus on characters whose hearts we're not going to get to know in the same way through the quest itself due to the format and Mariana's own biases, but who are still going to be vitally important to the story. And it's a look into what some aspects of the story mean - from Terastilization and Combat Links to the economic realities of Paldea to the simple existence of the Paradox Dragons - that we simply haven't gotten yet, and are highlighted particularly well by Tempera's more poetic and introspective style compared to Arvis's (which is just as nice to read, but a bit drier - some nice bread delightfully buttered by sidestory, if that metaphor isn't too forced).

Also like...as someone who's made it a habit of picking apart the main updates in this thread in excruciating detail as my main contribution to this semi-collaborative writing project, someone writing up an excellently composed and subjectively beautiful contribution to the actual story deserves a little more critical engagement than "I didn't like it", I think. The specific commentary might be different, and I don't want to speak for Tempera, but I just...I don't know. It's like someone bringing the wine to a dinner party and then another guest complaining that it's not their preferred brand. Everyone's entitled to their opinion, but it strikes me as...not so much rude as against the concept of hospitality, if that makes sense. I don't know maybe I got on a weird track with the bread metaphor.

Ryumancer said:
The rather blatant yuribaiting when they've basically just met also felt like a rather questionable decision.
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it's only baiting if it's not definitely going to be text
 
Isn't Nemona and the Scarlet/Violet protag instantly vibing with each other pretty much canon to the games? There's not exactly no basis for yuri lol.
 
The Meddler said:
Isn't Nemona and the Scarlet/Violet protag instantly vibing with each other pretty much canon to the games? There's not exactly no basis for yuri lol.
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It takes Nemona like two battles and a few hours to reach "Why are you battling these randoes? You can already have all the battles you could ever want. With me.", so yeah pretty much.

It might not be love as anyone less battle crazy understands it, but it was definitely something at first fight.

At this point I expect to make it halfway through Z-A before she shows up demanding to know what we're doing in the past when we should be battling her? Just Nemona.
 
[X] Fast and Furious

Feels very on-point for a Dragapult, quite literally based around being fast and powerful (though there's also the stealth part of stealth bomber) and having Drilbur lean into this due to Spark just make sit better.
 
Just seven more votes before Fast and Furious turns this around! One reason to vote for it is that it best uses Drilbur's unique abilities the most, and focusing on what makes our pokemon's unique seems pretty neat.
 
KnownParadox said:
Just seven more votes before Fast and Furious turns this around! One reason to vote for it is that it best uses Drilbur's unique abilities the most, and focusing on what makes our pokemon's unique seems pretty neat.
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Convince me, then?

The early focus on electricity is nice, but there is nothing saying we can't mix that in later. And like I said before, the sneaky style is something we can only see in written stuff really. But if you or someone else can convince me then I'll switch my vote.
 
I'm not the best with words but I'll do my best to try and explain myself, @Tempera .

Nemona just feels kind of... off. Like, we just saw Nemona have a battle where she just straight up tells her opponent. "Hey, you'd have more fun if you weren't holding back!" And then in this sidestory we instead have someone calling Nemona out for holding back.

Clavell being secretly gay. My mind is just, like, why? What did that add to a story focused on Nemona? Also, isn't he a champion class trainer? I could have sworn he was. So, for him to not even be at the 8th badge level seemed odd. Unless I'm misremembered, then your free to ignore this point.

Scarlet.... Honestly, your portrayal of Scarlet just didn't click with me at all. From her abrasive personality, to her being a secret treasure hunter because her mom is working two jobs to try and pay for her scholarship, to her having personal stakes for investigating Area Zero. It all just kind of rubbed me the wrong way, for some reason.
 
NMS said:
I'm not the best with words but I'll do my best to try and explain myself, @Tempera .

Nemona just feels kind of... off. Like, we just saw Nemona have a battle where she just straight up tells her opponent. "Hey, you'd have more fun if you weren't holding back!" And then in this sidestory we instead have someone calling Nemona out for holding back.
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This is actually canon!

Nemona has a conversation about it in the postgame, the first time she invites you over to her dorm room. In that conversation, she says;
Nemona: "Ta-ta-tachán! Welcome to the Zona Nemona!"

Scarlet: "It's so tidy!/It's very you!

Nemona: "Aw, thank— Wait a sec... I know we've been to YOUR room before...But have I never had you over here? Wild!"

"Anyway, uh... Listen, Scarlet. You know how I, well...You know how I really like Pokémon battles? Like, really, REALLY like 'em?"

Scarlet: "Yeah, you sure do/I noticed."

Nemona: "Cool. And yeah, you know how when you really like something, you dive in deep? That's what I did with Pokémon battles, and I... just kinda became a Champion? But then I found out that's pretty special—that normally, it's not so simple for most people. People would tell me to my face that I'd only managed it 'cause I have some innate gift, or 'cause I was raised differently, or whatever. And suddenly I started to feel like there was this invisible wall between me and everyone else. So I started going easy when I'd battle my friends. I just wanted everyone to have fun."

Nemona: "Oh, but don't worry, I'm not doing that anymore! I'm going 100-percent all out! Especially since I'm lucky enough to have an opponent around who can beat me even when I'm in full hard-core mode! So just promise me one thing, OK, Scarlet? Promise you'll always stay my equal! You and me, true rivals!"
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It's the brunt of where Nemona's character canonically ends up going. Her battling prowess ends up alienating her from her peers, and in an attempt to relieve that a bit, she starts taking it easier on everyone. That's an issue that only resolves itself through Scarlet/Violet, where her rivalry with Scarlet kickstarts her passion again and has her back to her vibrant herself from practically the instant they meet.

Is it ironic, given what she said to Katy? Yeah, actually. It's a very fun kind of irony; Nemona was able to spot the issues when it applied to Katy, but had a blind spot when it came to herself. She fell into the exact same trap that Katy fell into without realizing it.

You can see it happening in the quest already. Mary is already doing this to Nemona. She's treating Nemona like Nemona is something special, like she's got loads more talent than the others do, like Nemona is the mark by which she needs to measure herself.

So, yeah, I took that and ran with it a bit to end up putting Nemona in her canonical pre-canon state at the start of the interlude. By the end, you can see she's already shaken herself out of that funk thanks to finding herself someone who she can go all-out against and still feel like both of them are having fun with the fight.

Maybe I missed the mark in how I portrayed it, but the dissonance is deliberate.
NMS said:
Clavell being secretly gay. My mind is just, like, why? What did that add to a story focused on Nemona? Also, isn't he a champion class trainer? I could have sworn he was. So, for him to not even be at the 8th badge level seemed odd. Unless I'm misremembered, then your free to ignore this point.
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The primary mandate: Nobody associated with Class VII is allowed to be straight. That's just how it is.

Less glibly, it's not about focusing Clavell's character around being gay, per se. It's about giving Clavell a relationship- romantic or otherwise, though I did tilt the scales towards reading it as romantic, yes- that was shut down prematurely when that person went into Area Zero.

The primary reason for that is to look at the Team Star plotline. It's fairly unlikely that the canon state of that plotline, with all information about them being lost and Clavell having to go directly to the source to find out details of the incident, will happen. Thus, what motivation does Scarlet and Clavell have to go down that plotline?

With the altered motivations both of them have of 'finding out what's going on in Area Zero', the answer is they can directly trade their help with disbanding Team Star in exchange for Cassiopeia digging up information on the place.

Was it necessary? Probably not, but I had a lot of fun digging in to how the canon start might look like in the Tera Steel universe. And when I'm spending thirty-odd hours writing something for someone else's quest, I want it to be fun, you know?
NMS said:
Scarlet.... Honestly, your portrayal of Scarlet just didn't click with me at all. From her abrasive personality, to her being a secret treasure hunter because her mom is working two jobs to try and pay for her scholarship, to her having personal stakes for investigating Area Zero. It all just kind of rubbed me the wrong way, for some reason.
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I won't try and convince you to like the character. How you feel is how you feel, and personal feelings are valid.

I did pick and choose bits of her personality from the combination of the games themselves, Yaosabi's Biri-Biri video, and the Adventures manga, so there's a lot of different parts to her. Not everyone will like her, and that's fine. If she rubs you the wrong way, then disliking her is fine.

I just think it's nice to explain the problems people have with it. I'm not a perfect writer by any means, so I do recognize there can be significant issues in what I write; I'd just like those issues laid out so I can look at them and see if they're things I can fix in future writing. In this case, I think they're deliberate stylistic choices I'm not interested in walking back, but I appreciate that you spent the time to try and describe your issues with it nonetheless.
 
SolarGemX said:
*looks left and right slowly, makimg sure they werent followed*
*Wispers* How much... for a Sticky web, Stealth rock, spikes and Toxic spikes Tm's?
*looks at poke in hand* plus a pineco.
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That'll set you back... three smackaroos. But your enemies? That'll set them back uh-- most of their health, actually. Real nasty. Unless they have shoes. Shoes... bad for business.
 
SMBlade said:
That'll set you back... three smackaroos. But your enemies? That'll set them back uh-- most of their health, actually. Real nasty. Unless they have shoes. Shoes... bad for business.
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Luckily it's illegal for more than one Pokémon on a team to have shoes. Otherwise the entire entry hazard industry would collapse.

They already ran Sharp Steel out of business. A promising young upstart, but it was in the wrong era. A new player in a dying industry.
 
Extremely curious to see which one will win, and if Fast and Furious will make a comeback (probably not)
Though it's interesting that Seismic Shadow focuses more on the general capabilities of our pokémon, while Fast and Furious is more individualized and makes use of their personal characteristics.

Either of them are interesting, and can be expanded on.
 
This is one of those votes where I'm happy to see either win, even if I'm sticking my vote with F&F because I like playing funny initiative games and using fun Tera types.
 
Been super undecided on which I prefer for the vote (this shits hard)but Im gonna go with the funny sped one cause I think it plays wih our current team better, and we'll just go with mons that fit this style, Though i can also think of some fun stuff with terrain and effects that we might do if that option wins(Drillbur might be able to pantomime an Electric Terrain when she gets older and stronger)
[X] Fast and Furious
 
 
Despite wanting Seismic Shadow to win, the chaotic part of me is telling me to switch just to see what happens.
 
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