Attempting to Fulfil The Plan: ISOT Edition

author's note: thank you again to @Fakkk for helping me write this merchant omake.

A Tablet Detailing the Food of the People's Republic of Mycenaea

To my esteemed reader, as I have written of other topics in my travels in this log, I will avail you of the various types of cooking and food that has arrived in Achaea with the Americans, who before their arrival from their vast and rich empire enjoyed a massive glut of styles and types of meals and spices that they have since tried to replicate in their newly founded people's republic.

Mycenaean Barbecue, is a wonderful display of American ingenuity taken up by the native Achaeans as their rulers taught them. As I have been made aware this is a traditional American form of cooking that is sacred to them. It typically involves a main dish of some type of strong-textured meat that is slowly grilled by an offset oven that channels hot smoke into a closed cooking chamber. The type of wood and the flavor its smoke gives is incredibly important, but not as important as the spices that are infused into the meat before, during, and after the cooking process. And a process it is, I was assured, with great severity, that barbeque is not barbeque without three ingredients.

The first, 'slownlow,' is an ethos attached to cooking barbeque. I was told "barbeque is not barbeque if it isn't cooked for at least six hours." At least! It is a style of cooking that requires great thought, preparation, and attentive care. The meat must be grilled and smoked at the same time under low heat.

The second is the Barbeque Sauce. I was told that the Americans are unable to faithfully recreate the sauce they had in their empire, but that unlike slownlow it is allowed much more regional variation. However, there must be a sauce, as soaking the meat in it gives it its flavor as its cooked, it glazes the meat as it cooks, and the meat is dipped in the sauce as it's eaten. And each of these provides completely different qualities to the meat.

And finally there's the meat, the prime type of meat to be used in barbeque is fatty meat that would ordinarily be tough when cooked traditionally. The slow cooking of the meat allows the fat to render and soak into the surrounding meat, greatly enhancing its flavor when combined with the sauce.

One particular dish that comes to mind is the Texan style Swordfish, a slow cooked fatty fish doused in herbs and honey that is then smoked for a full day(6-8 hours) for preparation, it is accompanied by the yellow beans they call corn. The taste of the dish is as intense as the average american humors that rule over them, both fiery and sweet, strong yet mellow, and is very welcoming to new eaters. The dish is paired with cooked slices of tomatoes and mashed corn beans that provides a contrast to the intense flavor of the main course, the main course itself is doused in a heavenly concoction of the Barbeque Sauce which is where the majority of the flavors come from, as it is a mix of honey, mushroom, spicy peppers, mushed tomatoes, and fish sauce. A truly strange concoction that would take a wizard to divine the right combination, and yet they still manage truly a testament to their wisdom in both fields of industry and culture.

The food is paired with an interesting drink, not wine nor water but both a drink whose name translates to "Fruit Punch", I myself not sure why the Americans named a drink after an act of assault but it does as its namesake packs a punch to the taste. They serve the punch in a large glass pitcher, truly a strange contraption it's as the drink is held by the air itself, the drink itself looks simple it's water with several berries and sliced fruits that provides the majority of the flavor although i do sense a hint of wine within it although not as overpowering as the main flavor it self.

The building that served the barbeque was only open for one day a week, as the time before that was used to prepare the food in the first place, as in line with the ethos of slownlow. And when it did open it was expected for patrons to form a long line and wait to be served, there were great fights that broke out over position in the line, until the owner of the building threatened that any who fought would not be served food. Apparently those who were in the front of the line had cleared away their chores for the day early so that they could camp at the door and hold their place.

Talking to the patrons, many of them had contributed large portions of meat and other necessary supplies to the Pitmaster, the master artisan of the barbeque establishment, despite the grievous expense required. Apparently entire animals like goats and lambs, along with the previously mentioned fish were butchered and provided to the Pitmaster for him to cook.

Dishes of barbeque are often enjoyed communally between groups, as the dish is a rare delicacy and is often combined with other dishes served by neighboring establishments.

Strangely, one opportunistic custom I observed during these events was, a fellow brought food like biscuit and hardtacks for the others to enjoy while they await their barbeque, only to fatten them up so they could not eat the entire course and then take what's left of the uneaten barbeque as payment, truly a strange behavior. More experienced patrons of the establishment rebuffed the man, saying that they had not eaten the day before so that they could enjoy their fill.

The smell of spice and smoke permeates the air around the establishment, and calls a reminder to the grand spice markets in Kemet/Mesr. It causes one to salivate uncontrollably. The smell will cling on you like a fragrant long after you've enjoyed the feast, truly for one day every week all men can feast like a king, and for those who were too late there are still other establishment that also offer similarly strange foods.

Pitza is a type of flatbread that is spread into a wide circular dish then covered in tomato sauce, then cheese, then a variety of toppings of the patrons choice. The most popular topping in the city of Mycenae is anchovies and olives, however the American patrons often regard this with horror and disgust. Americans prefer thin slices of pork, peppers, or even just varying types of cheese.

The bread is made by throwing the dough through the air in a circular fashion, and the spectacle of this is half of the attraction. Pitza cooks will often perform acrobatics with the dough, delighting children and people of all ages. The pitza is then topped and put into a large wood fired oven with a large-faced paddle. When served it is cut into eight equal triangular slices, and is folded by the patron so the tip does not droop, and eaten while held.

After trying many types of pitza i must admit that i prefer multiple different cheeses, the stretchiness combined with the savory taste of the tomato and cheese is very satisfying, though the anchovy and olive pitza is fair as well.

Another popular American food is the tako. This tends to be a street food, it is a hard cornmeal, the beans I recorded earlier I have learned are actually a type of grain brought be the Americans, shell filled with grilled fish and fiery peppers, this is particularly popular in the city of Tiryns. It's a simple and filling meal, but the burn caused by the peppers is too much for my tongue, despite the locals loving it.

Inland another street food is often found. Another crop introduced by Americans is the potato, a hardy brown root that ranges from the size of one to two fists. They are a versatile food often used as filler, but the way I most encountered them was baked like bread. When raw they have a wood-like and pulpy texture, however when cooked they soften greatly, able to be mashed with little force at all. The potatoes are wrapped in a protective covering and set by a fire to cook, then are taken away, cut open, and mixed with butter, salt and cheese. This is then taken and eaten with a small, handheld fork or shovel made of iron.

Alongside the baked potato is the tamalle. This is made with a soft corn dough, unlike the tako, that is then stuffed with beans or meat, and cheese. It is rolled to form a long thin loaf and baked inside a corn leaf, which is peeled away as one eats it. It is very savory, as most American inspired dishes are.

There are, I am told, many more types of food that have been lost or are not recreatable by the Americans, and I was unable to try every type of food available in the time that I was visiting the People's Republic.