**Warning**
The following Omake is not meant to be canon or even rational. It is filled with dark humor that is partially influenced by Youtube. You have been warned.
@PoptartProdigy
Omake - The Education System of Virmire
The Virmereans are not the most intelectual of people but they do have those that 'graduate' from primary school. We now see the most typical of Virmire graduates." The documentarian said as Mira sat down to watch TV. She had decided to try and take a break by watching TV like a normal person. But she could tell that she was about to get upset, yell at this TV like a loon, and stomp back into her office 20 minuites after she said she'd be taking a vacation with her girlfriend.
Mira attempted to gird herself as she decided to weather the storm of disapointment that was about to come.
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"Finally gradauated Primary School, the rest of my life is going to be a BREEZE!" the graduate said. It's followed by a hard nosed Asarian contradictim the graduate student whose race is unknown.
"BIG FELLA YOU NOT GRADUATING! TAKE THIS BOOK BAG AND HEAD BACK TO CLASS!"
The graduate is confused as they look around before responding.
"Now listen, I didn't come for all that. I came here to graduate.
I am done." they say as they hold out there hand to shake.
The Asarian instructor however takes the diploma from the graduate.
"GIVE ME THIS DIPLOMA BEFORE I PUT YOU IN A COMA AND TAKE THIS BOOK BAG!"
The graduate is now even more confused and before they can get a word is cut off by the loud Asarian Insturctor.
"THERE'S A BIOLOGY BOOK IN THAT BOOK BAG. I NEED YOU TO READ ALL 1,200 PAGES!"
The Graduate responds "Hey hold on, I am done!" they whine as they stay close attempting to get a handshake still. Clinging for the sweet release of true freedom. It is not to be had.
Before he knows it the Graduate is on the ground after being hit by the Instructor with a long wooden ruler that she presumably got from her cleavage.
"GO BACK TO THE CLASSROOM! I NEED A 96,000 WORD PAPER ON HOW FAR THE SUN AND MOON IS FROM YOUR HOUSE.
THEN WE NEED YOU TO DO A SCIENCE PROJECT! WE NEED YOU TO SET YOURSELF ON FIRE, WE NEED YOU TO SET YOURSELF ON FIRE AND BURN YOURSELF ALIVE. AND THEN TELL US HOW LONG IT TOOK YOU TO BURN, YOU DUH-DUH
DORK!"
The student replies while sitting on the ground looking up in disbelief "But I need my diploma to feed my family."
"BIG FELLA I AM THROWING AWAY YOUR DIPLOMA!" The teacher says as he flings the diploma so hard it lands in a nearby tranquil pond. The Graduate and the Camera looks on as other graduates of a higher affluence celebrate and take selfies. The Instructor continues "-AND WE NEED YOU TO CATCH PNEUMONIA AND THEN WRITE A 10 PAGE ESSAY ON HOW IT FEELS TO BE SICK!"
"But graduation!" says the student whining as they pick themselves up from the ground.
"AND YOU FAILED ALL YOUR MATH CLASSES BIG FELLA! WE NEED YOU TO DO 20 MORE YEARS OF PRE-ALGEBRA, GEOMETRY, TRIGONOMETRY, AND CALCULAS. AND WE ALSO NEED 12 MORE YEARS OF HIGH SCHOOL WITH YOUR STU-STU STUPID ASS!" The Instructor finishes as the the student puts away there gown in the book bag given and runs off presumably to finish there education.
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Back in a tranquil living room Mira's head boils in rage. Her eye lashes, painfully stitched on with good cosmetics by the way, torn off in a frenzied rage as she shouts obscenities about the education system.
"THAT WAS A LITERATURE MAJOR!" she yells to the TV as the program finishes "THEY DON'T NEED MATH TO READ!".
Illena comes in at some point with a nice meaty pie on her hands "Mira is everything okay? I heard shouting dearie~".
"ACADEMICS!!" she snarled at the TV not paying attention before the sound of her lover truly sinks in. She huffs deeply before getting up from her frilly and cushy Asarian sofa chair and runs through the wall leaving a hole of her distance and well proportioned image.
Illena simply looks on and nods "Well okay, maybe next time boo~".