Skooma Cat (TES V: Skyrim)

"It's nice never being dead, too. When I die in the world of time, then I'm completely asleep. I'm very much aware that all I have to do is choose to wake. And I'm alive again. Many times I have very deliberately tried to wait patiently, a very long, long time before choosing to wake up. And no matter how long it feels like I wait, it always appears, when I wake up, that no time has passed at all. That is the god place. The place out of time, where everything is always happening, all at once." -- Vivec, when asked about being a god.
 
Ooh, those silly Daedras.

+gets smote+

Also, I missed the part where Clavicus is mentioned as nice.
 
  • About eleven thousand years from the time of Skyrim, Clavicus Vile becomes 'nice'.
Was that meant to be "nice" or "niece", because I read it as the latter one first. Honestly, I'm not sure which one would be more terrifying.
 
Chapter 22
---
Chapter 22: Uncle Sanguine would be Proud

Mohamara sat on the side of the road looking up at what used to be the Kilkreath Temple. He was actually seated on part of the roof that had escaped being launched into the river valley below by some nearby trees. Behind him, the beacon pulsed periodically with solar energy.

He was a mess, to put it bluntly. Kilkreath was gone because he wasn't good enough to be a Champion. And the reason he wasn't good enough was he'd been honest with Meridia. He didn't mind not being a Champion--he wasn't a great warrior, so whatever had lurked in the temple would likely be too much for him to handle. But the faithful of Skyrim now had nowhere to go for their worship because of him.

He'd just have to start on a new temple… which would require architects, lumber, quarried stone, artisans, and so much money. Mohamara held his head in his hands at the thought of how expensive the temple would be in terms of raw gold. But it was Meridia's direct orders--there was no way out of the situation unless Sheogorath decided to end his vacation.

But when he looked up at where the temple had been, the guilt ate at him. If he didn't do it then someone else in the faith would be asked to complete the temple. The absolute least he could do was get the infrastructure in place to see the temple completed. Ideally, after the mountain had cooled down into solid rock again.

The Khajiit was so wrapped up in the temple, he didn't notice the Companions coming back at first. It became hard to not notice them after Yagraz started poking his face incessantly to get a reaction out of him. He responded as a friend should, and bit her.

She lifted her hand, with Mohamara hanging from her finger like some sort of furry fish and grinned at the Companions. "See? Told you he was alright."

"Doesn't that hurt?" Farkas spoke the minds of Aela and Kodlak as they watched this play out.

"Not really--he's biting with his molars." Yagraz shrugged and set the tojay down. "So… how was Meridia?"

"She was mildly annoyed," the Khajiit admitted, hiding his guilt under a layer of humor. "Someone squatting in her temple, from what I could pick up. But, hey, at least the beacon didn't get blown up too."

Yagraz saw through him like a window and squinted down at the Khajiit. "What did you do?"

With his cover blown, the cat deflated. "Meridia was going to make me her Champion but decided against it when I told her why it took me so long to get the beacon. Which meant she had to blow up the temple because of me."

The Orc woman patted him on the shoulder and set down his backpack beside him. "That sucks short-stuff. But hey, at least you didn't lie to a Daedra--that always ends badly. Now come on, long walk back to Whiterun."

"Hasn't he told you yet?" Aela cut in with a disdainful scowl. "Apparently he wants to stay in Haafingar."

"I do have a job that needs doing," Mohamara snapped at the Nord woman. He glared at Aela before softening his expression and looking at Yagraz. "Is.. is that okay? I mean, I could always visit, or maybe move to Whiterun sometime?"

The Orc Companion grinned and ruffled the Khajiit's hair. "Of course it's okay. Finishing what you start is the first step to fixing that future problem you got goin' on. I'll be calling you on the regular, so you know." She stood to her full height and started to list things off on her fingers. "So be sure to look after yourself. Tell me the when and where for the wedding as soon as you know so I can inspect the match they got for you. Oh, and next time I come to Haafingar I'll bring the rest of your stuff from my place. One last thing…." She crouched down to look at Mohamara face to face before she put on her 'I will legitimately murder you' face. "If you're in trouble and don't ask for help I will hunt you down and beat your ass, do you hear me?"

"Love you too, best buddy." The tojay and Orc exchanged hugs and went their separate ways for a while.

--

Solitude was not having a good time. There were funerals for those that had died in Alduin's attack every day--accessing the temple of the divines for anything not funeral-related was impossible for a week's time.

Mohamara found it difficult to keep Elisif's spirits up, but when the Khajiit caravan finally arrived, the influx of goods and money they brought with them acted as an ointment for the city and by extension, Elisif.

Ma'dran was a cathay-raht, a ripped eight-foot tall panther-man and usually in sturdy merchant's clothes of blue linen. His very presence within the city made the guards nervous. He had scars from many battles and knew weapons like Mohamara knew enchantments. If it could be used to kill something, or someone, Ma'dran knew it. And since his caravan was allowed in the city, the Nords began to realize they had a kindred spirit in the jaguar-man.

To everyone's surprise, one of the first things Ma'dran did when he got to Solitude was to purchase one of the last standing houses in the Avenue's District--Proudspire Manor. The cathay-raht looked enormously pleased with himself handing over almost a wagonful of gold for the property.

"Ri'saad got his share," the jaguar-man spoke with a rumbling voice that rattled Mohamara's bones. "House puts us at risk of dragon attacks, but this one suspects it will also endear Nords to us. To buy and sell more goods, yes?"

"Your purchase is greatly appreciated, sir," Falk spoke as he stared, flabbergasted at the wagon of gold being unloaded. "Even with the recent unpleasantness, the city is greatly… served by your presence here." Most of the court was in attendance at the event, as Elisif wanted to meet Ma'dran herself.

When the deed changed hands, Elisif clapped her hands and servants brought several baskets of furs to present to Ma'dran. They looked, from Mohamara's perspective, like furred sections of clothes that had been removed. Some of them he recognized from Elisif's own wardrobe. "I have spent the time to learn about what previous Jarls of Solitude have done to your people," the Jarl said with a solemn expression. "I'm… horrified that my late husband would think to give me such things. And that a man as good as him would not see the inherent vileness of owning such things. I return them to you, with my apologies. I'm afraid I don't know the funerary practices of the Khajiit, but you have my permission to do whatever is necessary for these lost souls."

Mohamara looked at the fur from his place among the court and pieced together what the Jarl was implying. It was only when he saw a cat's tail among the furs--roughly cathay sized, that he realized what had been going on.

"This one thanks you for the return of lost kin," Ma'dran took up the baskets with no problems and rested them on his shoulder. "Khajiit will send them back to the homeland, where they can find peace with warm sands." Then the cathay-raht slapped his chest and gestured outward. "But to more pleasant things! This one invites kindly Jarl, and Ri'saad's ja'khajiit to Khajiit's new home. We must make the house a place of happiness, no?"

"I would be happy to attend." Elisif's face went from solemn to jovial, perhaps happy that Ma'dran had not dwelled on the unfortunate fate of so many Khajiit. Then she turned to Mohamara. "What about you, my Fool?"

The tojay had been busy trying to fight the urge to dive into the sympathetic bonds of the Khajiit pelts. 'Maybe I could find out who they were', he'd thought to himself. But no, it would only lead to him going blind for another week to try and help people far beyond help. He shook himself back to the present when Elisif repeated her question. "Yeah… yeah, I'll go, no problem."

Ma'dran let loose a cheer in the Khajiit language, ta'agra, and turned to leave the Blue Palace courtyard.

Elisif's court began to file back into the Palace, but the Jarl herself came over to Mohamara. "I heard from Falk that you made quite a substantial purchase of land after delivering my letter."

The cat watched Ma'dran leave, then looked up at his Jarl. "Oh, that. Well… someone has to watch Wolfskull, to make sure no one tries to get in there again."

Elisif nodded, putting on her serious face. "Agreed. If we could spare the men, I would set up a permanent watch there myself. You said there's a fort… inside the cave?" When Mohamara nodded, Elisif pinched the bridge of her nose. "Of all the stupid--who would put a fort inside a cavern?"

"Well, legend says that the fort used to be on the surface but sank down and the cave formed on top of it. Perhaps one of the Divines hoped to lock it away, but the cave worked its way through?"

That seemed to get the Jarl thinking. "Yes, perhaps I should speak to the priest at the temple of the divines about it. Perhaps we could beseech the Divines to seal the cave permanently."

"Not all miracles are made of magic, my Jarl." Mohamara grinned as only cats could. "Since Kilkreath recently… exploded, there has been a lot of debris in the roads and waterways I've heard. Rather than just casting it off into deeper water, if you permitted, those boulders could be used to seal up Wolfskull Cave."

"Are you suggesting… we make Wolfskull Cave a dumping ground?" Elisif faked looking outraged before her amusement burned through it. "Okay, I find the idea entirely too entertaining. I'll talk to Falk about it later. Now, as my Fool I want you to go ahead of me and help Ma'dran set up his house for whatever event they're throwing. I'll need you to help me avoid social faux pas when it happens."

Mohamara nodded and waited for Elisif to return to the Palace before he trotted off to find Ma'dran.

Proudspire Manor was, per the name, a manor house with a considerable courtyard and small orchard of fruiting trees behind it. The property rested between the partially destroyed bard's college and the curtain wall of the Blue Palace. When Mohamara saw it, he had no doubts that the property could house an entire caravan of Khajiit comfortably.

Ma'dran's caravan was busy unloading things from the caravan to the manor, furniture mostly. Their wagons lined the outer wall of the property while their horses were in the process of being taken to an attached stable. Among the caravaneers were many cathay, but not exclusively that morph. There were digitigrade suthay and suthay-raht among them, somehow shorter than a cathay despite walking on their digits.

There were nine other cathay-raht in Ma'dran's caravan, with the shortest of them being a seven-foot tall female. And Mohamara had the unfortunate luck that it was this group that spotted him first as he entered the property. The giants closed in on him before he realized he needed to run, and soon Mohamara found himself in the middle of a crowd of giant cats all squealing to each other.

They talked to each other and Mohamara in ta'agra, so Mohamara knew he'd likely have to engage a Tongues spell to speak back to them. However, his lack of response in the Khajiit language did not stop the cathay-raht from passing Mohamara around and chattering to each other. By the time Mohamara got the spell going where he could speak to them, he'd already had his tail measured, more than one had dared look up his robe, and his mouth had been pried open so that they could see his teeth.

"Eee! Look at young one's little fangs!"

"Couth youff pweaf gehh yourf fingahs ouff my mouf?"

"Such big ears on one so small!"

"Hey-ow! Don't pull so hard!"

"Look, toes so fluffy on the bottom! But no claws!"

"Give me back my shoes or I swear on Malacath's knuckle-dusters--"

"What has you all giggling like young ones with first moon sugar?" Ma'dran appeared at last, and the circle of giant Khajiit broke apart to let him in. He looked down at Mohamara with an arched brow before reaching down and yanking the tojay out of the larger Khajiit's ensnarement. "Ah, Ri'saad's tojay!" Ma'dran set the smaller Khajiit on his feet and barked orders to the other cathay-raht to get back to work.

"I don't suppose I could get my shoes back?" Mohamara asked the far, far larger Khajiit while being gently pushed into the manor's basement level.

Ma'dran recoiled at Mohamara's words and shook his head in disapproval. "You speak like a Nord, is as Ri'saad said. You know nothing of our ways. Your things will be returned once the caravan is done fawning over them, and you. It is so rare to have a tojay outside Elsweyr." He leaned in close and whispered into Mohamara's ear. "Some will ask you to spin moon sugar for them, and will not understand how you cannot know how to do it. Just say Clan Mother forbids spinning moon sugar out of schedule."

Mohamara hadn't even known moon sugar was spun. He immediately began to work on an idea for how the spun sugar was worked into the crystalline blocks he had seen Ri'saad's people partake of. "Okay… that's good. Um, Elisif wants me to make sure she doesn't insult anyone while she's here later."

Madran's relatively small ears flicked back and he scowled. "It pains this one to hear you speak our people's language like this. A tojay speaking this way would upset many of the more… delicate Khajiit back in the homeland. It is… this one can know what you say but is like a child. Stilted, slow, no cleverness." The pushing stopped when they were in a part of the cellar where great casks were stored.

Mohamara could smell wine in them--perhaps they were left by the previous owner. The wine was probably awful from being stored in improper conditions. "Well, that might be because I can't actually speak ta'agra. I'm using magic."

Ma'dran rubbed his huge face with his hands and groaned. "That is even worse. Oh, tell that to no one save Ri'saad or Ahkari--it would break the hearts of our caravaneers were they to hear. And you would get no rest until they taught you the language."

It was the tojay's turn to flick his ears back and scowl. "Alright. But to make this clear, I don't actually want to know the Khajiit language. It's bad enough knowing what my name means in this tongue."

The dark-furred cathay-raht peeked between his fingers. "What is wrong with your name, young one? Was your mother cruel?"

The tojay shrugged. "You heard it when Elisif talked to me earlier--don't tell me you didn't."

"Mohamara, child of love, what is so awful about that?"

"You went further down the translation route than I did, so kudos I guess? When I looked it up, my name translated to 'bastard'. Kind of puts you off learning the language, that." And he knew that the meaning held true in this time too, for he felt a sympathetic bond between the word Ma'dran heard him speak, and himself.

The cathay-raht gave Mohamara a pitying look. "This one understands. He wishes you would give our language a chance, but knows that it would be unpleasant." He took a deep breath and clapped his hands together. "Let us dwell on it no longer. It is in the past, forgotten, gone! What are we talking about? Oh, yes!"

Meanwhile, in the mind of a madman, Meridia suddenly realized she had made a terrible mistake trying to name her son after her sister.

--

Ma'dran spent a long while going over the party they were planning for the housewarming. Mostly it would be held outside, there would be plenty of moon-sugar food but since Elisif was attending they were going to make some sugar-free food. There wasn't going to be much pomp or ceremony so most of the risk of insult was actually on the sugar-addled Khajiit offending the Jarl.

The cathay-raht offered to let Mohamara stay with his caravan in Proudspire, which the tojay took him up on. It was going to be better than having to sleep in the kitchens since most of the vacant rooms had been destroyed by Alduin clipping the Palace. A young suthay man gave him back his shoes before he left to get his things and return.

When the time for the housewarming came around, Mohamara sat next to Elisif on pillows which surrounded a bonfire while the caravaneers went about their bizarre festivities. Elisif's housecarl standing behind her like a gargoyle kept most people from interacting with her aside to offer food. Sometimes Elisif would inquire about what sort of songs they were singing, and most often they seemed to be songs of fruitful hunts.

It was only much later that Mohamara would remember that it was Hircine's summoning day, and later still that he would realize whom they referred to when speaking of the 'Hungry Cat'.

What Mohamara also didn't know was that Ma'dran had noticed how the tojay was not eating or drinking anything from what the caravan had prepared. Mohamara would only eat what had been prepared for Elisif that the Jarl didn't want at the moment. As soon as the tojay smelled moon sugar, he set the food or drink aside. There were many problems with the tojay that Ma'dran knew Ri'saad would ask for help correcting as time went on, but the cathay-raht knew he could fix this right away.

Ma'dran had two glasses filled with spiced wine, purchased from a woman in the Wells District, and mixed a chunk of moon sugar the size of his smallest cleaving tooth into one. The spices in the wine blocked the smell of moon sugar from the cathay-raht, so they would certainly hide it from the weak-nosed tojay.

Ma'dran was all smiles good cheer when he brought the drinks to the Jarl and her Fool. "This one invites you to drink, to good health, good fortune, and good hunting!" A third glass he poured for himself and held it up as a toast.

Elisif toasted him quickly enough, but Mohamara was hesitant. Perhaps he was stronger-nosed than most tojay and could smell something wrong, perhaps he simply didn't like spiced wine. But nonetheless, the three of them drank--the human and cathay-raht far more than the tojay who was suppressing the urge to gag.

"I freely admit to being a milk-drinker," the Fool said as he forced himself to sip more of the wine. "Alcohol is just… nasty, ugh."

Elisif's housecarl snorted, while the Jarl herself got a good laugh out of it.

Ma'dran finished his goblet and returned to his seat to wait for the next step. It didn't take long before the tojay was visibly swaying on his cushion, and proved that it was as Ma'dran had feared. The Fool had never taken moon sugar before--he was showing the signs of a kitten tasting their first grains. Disorientation, pupils contracting and dilating out of control, and finally passing out.

Elisif and her housecarl were mildly alarmed when the tojay fell backward and spilled the remained of his wine all over himself, but Ma'dran was on his feet and to their side of the bonfire in no time at all.

"Hmm, perhaps this one should have given ja'khajiit a smaller cup," the cathay-raht said to the Jarl to lighten the mood. Ma'dran faced no resistance from either Nord as he carried the tojay away from the scene, then passed him off to a member of his caravan to sleep off the sugar and booze.

However, during the suthay woman getting the tojay out of his wine-soaked clothes before they stained, she happened to glance at his face and saw him staring back at her. His eyes had changed color, from their usual grey-blue to one orange, and one purple. The last thing the poor suthay remembered of that night was the unnaturally wide grin the tojay had given her.

--

Hi! I don't usually get to talk to you folks directly. Mostly because I can't think on enough layers to be constantly aware that I'm not really real, you know. Come to think of it, I'm probably not going to be aware that I ever had this brief talk past the wall with you fine people.

I just want to say something to you folks real quick.

I'm not enjoying this. This is not a fun adventure for me. And it really pisses me off that some of you are enjoying my suffering. You think I can't see you right now, looking at those screens at all this shit happening to me?

Bear in mind when you keep on reading my awful adventure--when you look in on the Cat, the Cat looks in on you.

With love, Mohamara.

--

The tojay woke up, stinking of wine, in his underwear, in the middle of a cat pile made up of sleeping caravaneers. When he processed all these pieces of information, he groaned to himself and started the process of getting out of the pile.

'Tell me I didn't get drunk and… oh, Yagraz is going to give me so much shit about this.' Mohamara thought to himself rather than talk, so that he wouldn't wake any of the Khajiit up and stumbled away from the cat pile. Some of the caravaneers tried to grab at him instinctively as he left, and Mohamara was mildly glad he had so few clothes for them to catch their claws on to drag him back.

He was in the Proudspire Manor basement he realized, which at least meant he hadn't gotten up to much mischief while drunk, he thought.

'See this is why you need to refuse the wine next time.' Mohamara berated himself in his head as he ascended the stairs to make his way to the small room on the second floor set aside for him. 'You're too small to be heavy drinkers--less blood means less blood-alcohol level needed.'

Thankfully he was young enough to be able to drink and not get a hangover, or perhaps he hadn't drunk all that much. Mohamara found his room locked when he got to it, but easily unlocked the door with a bit of magic. Inside he found his barely made bed occupied, and most of his stuff strewn across the floor. He let the two cathay stay in the far-too-small for them bed and started to pick up his things.

At least nothing had been stolen.

However, when he powered on his slate he found that a missive servitor open with a list of things written in exemplary calligraphy and then scratched out. It read as such:

To Do List
1. Stare at nothing, and have nothing stare back at me.
2. Catch that motherfucking tail.
3. Fix all the streetlights in Solitude.
4. Jazzercise.
5. Kiss a girl and find out I don't like it.
7. Find out who stole 6.
8. Solve world hunger, tell no one.

9. Play that funky music.

Mohamara fell back onto his butt and held his head as he read through the list. "Oh, Malacath's threatening tusks. I'm going to be in so much trouble, aren't I?"

"You certainly will be if you don't talk quieter, ja'khajiit," said one of the cathay in Mohamara's bed.

"Bah," said the other. "Is more quietly, not quieter."
---
Let us take a moment to reflect on how monumentally pissed Potema would be to discover her special necromantic ritual cave had become Haafingar's first official landfill. Mmm. That's some juicy rage right there.
 
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I've come to the opinion (just tested it out) that the Dunmer are a bunch of whinging brats. They bitch about the guards never coming to their defence, but I just pick pocketed a dunmer (as a Nord), killed him, turned around, and a guard told his gods damned Thane that I've committed crimes against Eastmarch and its people, and when I said they'd never take me, a Nord, alive, he fucking tried to kill me. Over a Grey Skin.

I ran, wanting to see what'd happen, and I must have had ten or so guards chasing me through the market place,
over a Grey Skin, before I finally got bored and shield bashed everyone to death.

I reloaded, and then went about my business trying to get my enchanting up so I could make a Kickass Sword of Undead Destroying. If Bethesda wanted us to buy that the Stormcloaks were both racist, and treating the Nords under their rule poorly, they should have put more effort in than a few lines of dialogue. I know what they're trying to show, but gods damn it comes off so poorly. In dialogue it's there, mechanically, not at all.

/grumble.

EDIT:
You're an adorable little bastard, Moho. Yes you are. *pokes the kittens face*.

It's hilarious that his mother named him that.

I really hope he taught Jazzercise to the Imperial Legion, and I have to know who he kissed. Was it Elissif? The Streetlights are broken? Is that an Alduin attack thing, or perspective from a different era, or the way Solitude is? I have to go there and find out.
 
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However, when he powered on his slate he found that a missive servitor open with a list of things written in exemplary calligraphy and then scratched out. It read as such:

To Do List
1. Stare at nothing, and have nothing stare back at me.
2. Catch that motherfucking tail.
3. Fix all the streetlights in Solitude.
4. Jazzercise.
5. Kiss a girl and find out I don't like it.
7. Find out who stole 6.
8. Solve world hunger, tell no one.
9. Play that funky music.
Considering they are scratched out... They are all done?

That poor girl.
 
I've come to the opinion (just tested it out) that the Dunmer are a bunch of whinging brats. They bitch about the guards never coming to their defence, but I just pick pocketed a dunmer (as a Nord), killed him, turned around, and a guard told his gods damned Thane that I've committed crimes against Eastmarch and its people, and when I said they'd never take me, a Nord, alive, he fucking tried to kill me. Over a Grey Skin.

I ran, wanting to see what'd happen, and I must have had ten or so guards chasing me through the market place,
over a Grey Skin, before I finally got bored and shield bashed everyone to death.

I reloaded, and then went about my business trying to get my enchanting up so I could make a Kickass Sword of Undead Destroying. If Bethesda wanted us to buy that the Stormcloaks were both racist, and treating the Nords under their rule poorly, they should have put more effort in than a few lines of dialogue. I know what they're trying to show, but gods damn it comes off so poorly. In dialogue it's there, mechanically, not at all.

/grumble.

EDIT:
You're an adorable little bastard, Moho. Yes you are. *pokes the kittens face*.

It's hilarious that his mother named him that.

I really hope he taught Jazzercise to the Imperial Legion, and I have to know who he kissed. Was it Elissif? The Streetlights are broken? Is that an Alduin attack thing, or perspective from a different era, or the way Solitude is? I have to go there and find out.


Man maybe I'm allergic to what seems like unnecessary darkness but that sorta seems unecessarily dark?


Like seriously Skinning khaji? For clothes? Like why did. They mistake them for a Saber cat?
Is this supposed to be something inculcated in him by his Vampire nanny? Weren't they imperial citizens when this was supposed to be happening.

Ma'dran. You suck. Why you gotta drug my boy and ignore his concerns and lie to his face like that. Then you have the gall to not even say it right. Mohamara means child of love. You speak like a Nord and we're likely taught to speak like one. The one who gave that name was likely similar.

Also putting him on moon sugar in public when Skooma Cat is watching. Shame.


Also Meri. Bad mom bad. Talk to your son. Admit fault hug him lots. Explain this shit. He's a depressive little wreck he will never take a compliment in the spirit it is given and will take mistakes as insults.
 
Think you may not have meant to quote me.

But moon sugar in public would have been hilarious. And he is a fool.
 
Think you may not have meant to quote me.

But moon sugar in public would have been hilarious. And he is a fool.
Ah no. I just forgot to add the reply relevant to you. Taking Skyrims response to generic actions as indicative of things is unwise. The faction dynamics are no where near as developed as say Fallout New Vegas. Even in new Vegas you lose Karma raiding Powder Gangers and get it for killing them. Though I guess you could be robbing the NCR?

Sure you robbed and killed a grey skin the guards can't tell.
 
No worries.

So, Chairtastic, I'm not sure if your enchanting system will allow this, but here's a weapon your little Khaajit might enjoy, I call it Laas Kaal, meaning Champion of Life in Dovahzul.

You gather Auriel's Bow, a Dawnguard Rune Axe, and a Silver Sword. You disenchant Auriel's Bow, and the Dawnguard Rune Axe, and put both enchantments onto the Silver Sword.

Silver Weapon: When used against the Undead such as Draugr, Skeleton, and Dragon Priests the base damage of the weapons is increased by 20 points
Auriel's Fire: 20 points of sun damage. Undead targets take triple damage.
Sunfire: Does 10+n sun damage to undead where n is the number of undead killed with the axe since the last sunrise.

That's a 8+20+60+10+n= 98+n damage, where n is the number of undead killed with the axe since the last sunrise.

Now, I'm clearly using a mod to let me unenchant Artifacts, but who knows, your character might be able to do the same thing if he has either Meridia or Sheogorath, or both helping him. Or maybe in the 24th Era they can just do that.

Yagraz will likely have a heap of silver weapons lying around by now. In the mod I've got, Silvered is an enchantment you can learn, and with the Ordinator Perk; Miracle, you can apply three enchantments, once, to an object. I used an Imperial Sword (Legendary), to apply the enchantments to, because it's got the dragon motif to go with my Dragon Carved set, and the general "I'm a Dragonborn Badass" thing I had going on.
 
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Man maybe I'm allergic to what seems like unnecessary darkness but that sorta seems unecessarily dark?
Like seriously Skinning khaji? For clothes? Like why did. They mistake them for a Saber cat?

That might be due to my usual writing style of progressively more awful things happening to characters and delighting in their suffering. But the Khajiit fur trade is a thing that happens in TES canon, look at the book 'Confessions of a Khajiit Fur Trader' for some indication. It might not happen as often anymore, to the point where Elisif is horrified by the practice, but it did historically happen. Makes you think about all those 'you'll make a fine rug, cat!' lines people shout at Khajiit in Skyrim, hmm?

As for Imperial citizens, the Septim dynasty gave active, negative shits about what happened to the beastfolk or their provinces. They only cared insofar as they regularly got their taxes, and that's it. Elsweyr repeatedly petitioned the Empire for relief during times of crisis, perhaps not at opportune times, granted, but was ignored. It is both, in the canon of this story, and in TES canon, one of the contributing factors to why the Khajiit repeatedly join the Aldmeri Dominion. The Dominion has historically been a fantastic ally to the Khajiit, and at least the current incarnation pretends to care what happens to Khajiit, which is more than the Empire did. Elisif has realized this, and it's partly why she has so much Nord guilt on the subject.

Also Meri. Bad mom bad. Talk to your son. Admit fault hug him lots. Explain this shit. He's a depressive little wreck he will never take a compliment in the spirit it is given and will take mistakes as insults.

Meridia can't admit fault, it goes against her nature. She literally cannot admit to bad things being her fault, it would be like asking a human to breathe mercury. She would, perhaps, be better served by having her chamberlain do most of the direct parenting, but Shalidor is occupied at the moment.

EDIT: Realized my wording contadicted in-story stuff, so corrected.

Slap that on a crossbow, and we in bid'ness.
 
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It'd have to be using silver bolts for the plus 20 to base damage, but otherwise sunfire and auriels fire will both go on a crossbow.

Edit: the bolts can come from melted down weapons taken from the silverhand.

2nd edit: he'll likely want the enhanced crossbow which does 19 base damage +20 for silver, and then the rest of the enchantments damage.

Elsif shouldnt have nord guilt. She's a breton.
 
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Tell me these problems, and perhaps I can make it better? :V I mean, a bunch of the city just got leveled, so now's as good a time as any.
 
Tell me these problems, and perhaps I can make it better? :V I mean, a bunch of the city just got leveled, so now's as good a time as any.

Let's start with: WHAT FUCKING IDIOT builds a city on a stone arch!?! It looks cool as hell, but it's one bad storm away from 'Solitude goes down da hole'. Elsif ought to be getting our Cat of Many Ouchies to help her out with building a suburb so they don't lose the whole damn city next time.
 
Bear in mind when you keep on reading my awful adventure--when you look in on the Cat, the Cat looks in on you.
With all due respect, Mr. Mohamara, you're just not likable enough for us to consider altering your story for your benefit. However, advice is free.
I reccomend either attempting to get Sheogorath to run interference on your writer, or start cheating.
Surely your special blood could be sold at a high enough cost to cover profit and magical blood replenishment? I have no clue how your tech and magic system works, so I can't suggest the normal "aluminum refining" business.
Please reply as soon as possible,
A Fan.

Great work as always.
 
Chapter 23
Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to do magic~

---
Chapter 23: Laid to Rest

Mohamara went to the docks with some of the caravan's fishers to catch breakfast. It had been a bit awkward to change into his swimsuit with the layabouts still in his bed but they never moved their heads up to peek so ultimately not an issue.

Haafingar's waters were significantly warmer than Eastmarch's, likely due to the magma chamber of the inactive volcano that was Mount Kilkreath heating up the environment. So the tojay was able to put on a robe to make the journey to the East Empire Company docks. When he got outside he saw what, apparently, he'd done to the lamp posts and braziers that lit up Solitude's streets at night.

Stone statues of winged figures replaced what had been wooden posts holding up tallow candle lamps, and in their hands, they held faceted orbs that shone from within with golden light--like the beacon or Mohamara's amulet. As the sun rose from the north, the light from the lamps waned until they were inert. The new street light statues came in pairs, except at intersections where there would be eight--and in the destroyed part of the Avenues District, the rubble had been cleared for the new additions.

The tojay decided that if no one knew he'd done it, he wouldn't claim credit for it. That way no one could ask how he'd done it.

Each of the fishers for the caravan specialized in getting different sorts of fish. There was a mudcrabber, a small-line fisher, two slaughterfish hunters, an egg collector, and a salmon fisher whom Mohamara would be helping. After the initial giggling at Mohamara's swimsuit, they became envious of the water breathing enchantment on it.

With his amulet back, Mohamara was happy enough to enchant some of their gear with the enchantment as well. To them, it must have seemed strange how the tojay would pinch one facet of the amulet and draw out hair-fine threads of golden light then wove them into earrings, bracelets, and other pieces of jewelry for the Khajiit. But the effects were most welcome.

The tojay found salmon hunting surprisingly enjoyable. There was always a sense of satisfaction from snatching salmon out of the air when they jumped up waterfalls, but also a thrill that came from chasing them down in the water. With a second, larger, Khajiit to herd the salmon towards him, Mohamara found it easy to kill multiple salmon at once. He used his fangs, of course, but also sympathetic bonds to transmit the sensation of death to other nearby salmon. This stunned the fish and made them easy to eliminate one by one.

Mohamara had to explain how he was doing so well to the salmon hunter, who demanded answers when they brought in their first haul. The suthay woman tugged on her ears when she found out it was magic. "Mama said to become a mage, but no, this one knew better than wise old mama. Foolish."

With Mohamara helping, the salmon quota was met before an hour had passed. From there, he helped the egg collector hunt down and collect fish roe while the suthay salmon hunter guarded the catch.

A distant, but familiar, chirping in the water from the north towards Haafingar bay froze Mohamara in the water for a minute. It was so obvious, that the cathay egg collector thought he'd been paralyzed by a stone turtle until the tojay moved again. Needless to say, Mohamara did not venture northward with the egg collector for possible salmon roe and opted to collect histcarp and slaughterfish eggs closer to the docks instead.

It was a bountiful catch all around, and when the fishers were ready they started back up the road to Solitude. The salmon hunter even showed Mohamara how to balance his basket of salmon as she did, which made for an amusing sight. At least, a brigade of Imperials escorting Stormcloak captives up to Castle Dour thought so.

"Excuse me," an unfamiliar Breton spoke and came up to the Khajiit train. Mohamara recognized her uniform right away, Restoration robes with armored limbs and an amulet of Stendarr on prominent display. "Were you here for the dragon attack?"

"No," the cathay-raht slaughterfish hunter in charge of the fishers responded easily. "We came long after."

"I see. Have you perchance seen a tojay Khajiit around town, then?"

The salmon hunter and mudcrabber wordlessly stepped in front of Mohamara and used their basket and crabbing buckets to block him from the Vigilant's view.

"Tojay is rare Khajiit, would not be allowed out of homeland. You will not find one in Skyrim." With the conversation at an end, the train of fishers resumed their march, with Mohamara being careful to hide away.

It proved in vain, however, as Mohamara was yanked away from the fishers by his tail when passing by the Bretons. As one the caravaneers set down their catches to bear fang and claws on the Vigilant.

The Vigilant shoved Mohamara to the ground and held him there with a boot while she held onto his tail. The tojay kept the salmon basket over his head to protect against mace blows to his skull.

"You let ja'khajiit go, we only cut you up a little," snarled the mudcrabber as the fishers circled around the Vigilant. Someone nearby was calling for the guards.

Mohamara heard two more sets of armored feet step up beside the Breton. Of course, Vigilants rarely went anywhere alone.

"This thing isn't worth you defending it," implored the Breton Vigilant. "It gives itself freely to a Daedra, conjures them to do its bidding and draws the wrath of the Divines with its every waking action."

"To be fair," Mohamara attempted and held up a finger, "I literally only know one conjuration spell." For his trouble, one of the Vigilants flanking the Breton stomped on his hand.

"Silence! Whether we fail doing our Lady's work or live to see the glory, you will die today, monster!"

"...Wait, isn't S'rendarr a male?" The small-line fisherman asked.

"Fool," hissed the Breton's Dunmer compatriot to her. "Kill the cat, and let us be done."

"For Boethiah!" The Breton lifted her mace high, and probably wouldn't have been able to get through the salmon basket before the Khajiit finished her off, but there was a commotion. Soon after, the Breton's grip on Mohamara's tail relaxed and he was able to scoot away to the safety of the fishers.

When he looked up, he saw that a Stormcloak captive had broken away from the escort and was choking the Breton using her own bindings to do so. Shortly afterward two archers cut down the other false Vigilants, and Imperial soldiers caught up to the escapee.

"I couldn't stand by and let them kill something so cute," the Stormcloak soldier said as she released the dead Breton and went back to the escort without resistance. "Orkey himself couldn't do that cute face harm."

--

While Mohamara chewed on his breakfast salmon, the fishers told the rest of the caravan the story about the fake Vigilants. So long as his mouth was full of grilled fish, the tojay wasn't asked to comment on the event. He didn't think Boethiah would be particularly pleased with her servant's attempt on his life. It was too direct, they didn't have enough contingencies, and worse still: They'd failed.

However, Ma'dran picked up on something else that the fishers had told the caravan--how Mohamara could enchant things without the 'big table', or an arcane enchanter. Mohamara couldn't help but snort at the idea of using one of those hideously outmoded pieces of arcana. More than half the enchantment's power would be lost on the poor transfer rate alone, with only grand souls having enough to survive the process with a strong enchantment.

Ma'dran approached Mohamara after breakfast with a request: Enchant some of the caravan's weapons so that they could be sold at a higher price. However what he didn't tell Mohamara right away was that as the tojay was doing this he made an offer to the city guard to have their swords and shields enchanted by Mohamara as well.

The tojay only picked up on the trick when he noticed a lot of Solitude wolf-emblem shields being added to the pile. "I'll handle this order," the tojay said to Ma'dran when he figured it all out, "if I get a cut of the gold."

"Ten percent," Ma'dran fired back.

"Fifteen percent."

"Twelve percent, highest this one will go."

"Deal." With that out of the way, Mohamara went back to drawing soul-thread out of his amulet for enchanting.

Meridian amulets were morpholiths. They were objects capable of holding different grades of transfinite power sources, same with soul gems. But Oblivion-made morpholiths could hold exponentially more than Nirn-mined ones. They also required rather heavy investment into conjuration to obtain, a pact with a Daedric Lord, and most were one-use same with soul gems.

If all that set up hadn't been done, Nirn-grown soul gems beat out Oblivion-grown morpholiths in terms of sheer money and time saved. But once the infrastructure was in place, Oblivion-grown morpholiths kicked the living annihilation shit out of any Nirn-grown soul gem.

The unique configuration for Meridian morpholiths made them 'rechargeable'. Mohamara's amulet drew from the Skyrim regional beacon, which drew directly from the sun. He could get as much common grade soul-thread as he needed from the amulet, or risk he could Meridia's displeasure and draw grand soul-thread from the beacon.

Perhaps, if he lived long enough, he could learn to draw soul thread from sunlight.

In two hour's time, the Solitude city guard became the most well-equipped guard force in Skyrim. Their swords enchanted with a torpor effect that induced exhaustion in those they fought, while their shields were reinforced with a kinetic dampening effect.

The cathay who would be selling the weapons watched in wonderment as Mohamara did his enchanting thing. "This one isn't able to understand," he said. "Khajiit thought only Azura's Star could be soul gem with many uses? And none spin thread like ja'khajiit can."

"Well," Mohamara bit the common soul-thread to end the line and finish the enchantment. "Most soul-trap enchantments from this time period aren't sophisticated enough to properly pair with Azura's Star." As he worked the steel greatsword began to gather frost on its surface from the ice enchantment. "Azura's Star can hold up to nine grand souls, one in each arm and another in the hub. So if you have the honor of using it, you can get some unbelievably strong enchantments."

Mohamara remembered the first time he'd seen Azura's Star in the news scry. A failed attempt by a Bosmer enchanter to create a Lk'Fonald's ice-cream maker that would never break. She had been so close but it just wasn't meant to be. Valenwood had been trapped under two feet of soft-serve for a week, an ecological nightmare.

Ma'dran grinned like a madcat when the last of the Solitude guards took their new weapons and handed over a satchel of the Jarl's gold for the job. In a few short minutes, a considerably smaller coin purse found its way to Mohamara, who took it as a sign for a break.

"Weird," he said to himself as he walked up to the Blue Palace. "That my place of work is now the break from the house. All in one day. Ugh."

Elisif lit up when the tojay appeared in the throne room before her energy was sapped by Falk talking about a letter from Igmund about a contribution to Solitude's rebuilding effort. Bryling, the only Thane of Solitude currently in town, filled Mohamara in on what had been discussed while he was gone. Elisif had instituted a tax on inheritances left by the wealthiest members of her nobility. And General Tullius had sent a runner to announce that due to generous contributions from the Imperial province's citizens, Solitude would no longer have to foot the bill for the Legion's activities in Skyrim.

"So, is the General going to perhaps pay our Jarl back for all the months where she was footing the bill?" Mohamara's question had been in the tone of the Fool, to try and get a laugh out

The Jarl flicked her hand at her Fool. "There is no need. With the new tax in place, and the freed up funds, along with Igmund's generous contribution, we should be able to refill our coffers and see the city fully repaired." A sudden thought caused Elisif's good mood to waver. "Though… Morthal was attacked, and we didn't offer any help to them. Falk, draw up a letter to Jarl Idgrod Ravencrone, I want to see if there's anything we can do."

"Ah, I'm sure she would appreciate it, my Jarl." Falk started with his 'that's a stupid idea' tone of voice. "But Morthal the city didn't take any damage from the Stormcloak attack. Ulfric's boys never got close enough."

"Oh. Well them she could use funds to help secure her Hold further against future attacks."

"Perhaps… we could make that offer after Solitude is fully repaired?"

"Or your Fool can go down to the swamp and do for Morthal what he just got done doing for his Jarl?" Mohamara cut in and stepped away from the gallery pillars with a bow. "I just got done enchanting all the Solitude city guard's weapons and shields. If you please, my Jarl, I could ply my craft for this… Idgrod?"

The Jarl looked at Mohamara and then at Falk. Firebeard looked pensive for a time, perhaps trying to find a reason not to help Morthal. But he did not do so quickly enough, and Elisif clapped her hands to announce her decision.

"Very well. Fool, I charge you to go to Morthal and offer your enchantment services to the Jarl. While you are there, see if there is anything we can do to ease their burden, and bring back that information. You may leave whenever you're ready."

"My Jarl, you cannot be serious." The new court wizard, a High Elf man with a Han Syke beard-mustache combo, Melaran, stepped out of the gallery pillars to wag his finger at Mohamara. "This Khajiit couldn't have possibly enchanted all the city guards swords, let alone shields. That would be over three hundred enchantments, weeks of effort, and a volume of soul gems that would have been detected by the customs office. It is simply improbable that--"

"Hey, you. Guard guy." Mohamara cut off the elf looking to increase his influence by tearing the Khajiit down by addressing one of the guards standing watch at the hall to Elisif's quarters. "Could you come over here?" When the guard was standing in front of them, Mohamara touched the wolf-emblemed shield, and the Nordic knots he had woven into it lit up as if they'd always been there. "See that knot right there? The one that looks like a cat with three eyes? My signature, thank you."

Melaran was absolutely gobsmacked as he inspected the shield, as well as the guard's sword once it was drawn. "How did--this is unlike any enchantment work I've seen. You could not have possibly--"

"Yeah, I don't really care enough about you to embarrass you in front of the court as much as you deserve for this. So, to make a long story short: You can learn a lot of things at college when you don't spend all your free time felatiating the professors." Mohamara trotted off to the stairs, before turning to pull at his eyelid and stick his tongue out at the High Elf. "Toodles!"

While he left the now shouting High Elf behind, Mohamara considered what would be the optimal enchantments for people living in a swamp. To be blunt, enchanting their armor would probably serve them better than their weapons. Water-walking boots would be incredibly useful to avoid being dragged down into the muck since it also worked on the really muddy ground. Considering the population difference, he didn't expect the work to take even a day once he actually got down to Hjaalmarch.

Imagine his surprise when he got back to Proudspire Manor and found two High Elf women and Ma'dran chatting to each other while examining some of the tojay's clothes. The Khajiit carefully cleared his throat to let the trio know he was around. "Ma'dran? Those mine?"

The cathay-raht laughed a bit while the High Elves ignored Mohamara. "Ja'khajiit, this one just let these two examine the craftsmanship of your fancy clothes--perhaps learn how to make it as well?"

"Well if he's here, I suppose he can fill us in on some things," one of the High Elves said. Mohamara immediately recognized the voice as one of the tailors Yagraz had taken him to. "Why do these labels on the inside mention 'automaton washable', or 'fabric softener?' What are those things?"

Mohamara explained as much as he could about the clothes while growing progressively pinker in the face as their questions became inappropriate. Ma'dran seemed to have no issues with them, and Mohamara didn't want to make a fuss for the caravaneer who had been nice to him. The one thing he was adamant about was refusing to actually sell the clothes to them, or let the tailors take some of the items apart to put back together.

Once they were gone, the tojay and cathay-raht had a brief staring contest. "If I didn't show up, were you going to sell my stuff to them?"

Ma'dran waved him off. "No, no. Would be stealing. Is one thing to leave things in the open for others to use, is another to take personal things. Besides which," the jaguar-man held up one of Mohamara's socks to illustrate his point. "Buyers for clothes in this size are rare. Not worth loss of trust from ja'khajiit and Ri'saad."

"Okay, good. So hand 'em over, I need to get ready to go to Hjaalmarch for a bit."

--

On the carriage ride over to Morthal, Mohamara did some brainstorming. Perhaps he could develop an army of construction automatons to build the temple instead of needing manpower. It could potentially save him a lot of gold but then would come the quality of life issue. Dwarven automatons filled the perfect niche of intelligence of being intelligent enough to self-plan and execute on ideas without becoming self-aware. But he'd more than likely miss, either making something too stupid to improvise, or too smart to be considered an automaton any longer. And if the war dragged on, his workers would likely be appropriated for the war effort either way to repair Skyrim's crumbling forts.

Making long-term plans seemed an invitation for Sheogorath to mess things up, which was never good. The Mad God's vacation time was running close to half a year by that time--how much relaxation could a demented Daedra really need?

Unbeknownst to Mohamara, a fanged feline fiend hid underneath the carriage, waiting to ambush the tojay once the sun was down. However, his patience was tested by the rocky road down to Hjaalmarch, which saw him being slammed into the road multiple times from minor potholes or debris in the road.

It was dusk by the time the carriage reached the frosty southern road into Morthal, and both the Khajiit and the vampire hunting him had laid down to nap on either side of the carriage floor for the trip. Both were jarred awake by the carriage's stop, and for a moment the vampire forgot his purpose.

The two found each other on either side of the wagon, stretching from their long trip, and froze when they saw each other. The living Khajiit and the cathay vampire stared at each other before Mohamara gathered sunlight in his hands and the vampire drew steel to leap at him, snarling.

The vampire instead found a steel bolt pierce into his mouth, which ruined his composure for the pounce attack. It wasn't enough to kill him but the repeated blasts of concentrated sunlight from Mohamara saw the undead Khajiit turned to ash in moments.

An aging Orc in leather clothes with plates of armor riveted onto them stepped forward and stowed away his weapon while Mohamara and the carriage driver stared. "Durak, with the Dawnguard," the Orc introduced himself and offered his hand to the Khajiit to shake.

"Mohamara, a friend of Maria, Fool of Solitude," responded the Khajiit as he shook hands with the 'Dawnguard'.

"Don't know who Maria is, but if she teaches kids like you how to spot vampires, she's alright in my book." Durak knelt down to inspect the bizarre spider-web armor the Khajiit vampire had been wearing. "As I suspected, a Volkihar."

"I'm not a kid--I'm just short." Mohamara wondered how the Orc could tell a vampire's bloodline from the ashes, but that wasn't what interested him the most about what had been said. "Wait, what? Volkihar are ambush predators, why would this one be actively hunting?"

"Most likely it had its lair taken over by a stronger vampire and was looking for thralls to set up a new one. There's no notes or journal in its pockets, so we won't know." Durak stood and dusted the vampire's remains off his hands. "Look, I don't know why you're here, but the wise thing to do is to get back in that carriage and go far away. Morthal's dealing with a bit of a vampire problem at present."

"You know, that is an outstanding idea," the carriage driver said and quickly got back into his spot. "Come on in, we can make it back to Snowhawk before it gets too dark."

"Oh by Malacath's hairy back, no." Mohamara's invocation of the Orc Daedra startled Durak. "If there's one thing Maria would be absolutely livid with me about is letting undead push people around. You fill me in on the situation, and I'll help you put these corpses back where they belong. In the ground, in case you didn't--"

A female Nord vampire in similar armor to the Khajiit that had just been slain burst from the bushes and charged at them with ravenous hunger in her eyes. Mohamara fired a bolt of sunlight at her face, which stunned her and opened her up to be shot through the heart by Durak.

"I think I got what you're saying," the Orc commented while the vampire woman crumbled to dust. "Come on, let's get to Highmoon Hall so the Jarl can fill you in on what's happening."

---
Don't you just hate calling up your local Lk'Fonald's for some a burger delivery with some ice cream, but the ice cream machine is broke? I do.
 
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