Turns out being in black ops is morally ambiguous at best! Who could have imagined?!
Shoganai - An Ignoramus SI in Naruto
- Thread starter industrious
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- naruto self insert
Tsunade is trying and, as most here seem to feel, Nobu doesn't need to ever embrace her, but damn it's sad to see. She's abrasive and messed up but she's lost her entire family and it must hurt to try to make that little gesture about Senju tradition knowing it's going to be rejected.
I absolutely get Nobu's perspective but at the same time Tsunade is just a genuinely pitiful person. Unlike Kabuto or Itachi or Pain she doesn't have some awful series of atrocities to her name covered up with a sob story, at least no more than a career ninja always has. Really hoping she can get some kind of closure eventually even if it's just because Nobu gets tired of being so angry with her.
I absolutely get Nobu's perspective but at the same time Tsunade is just a genuinely pitiful person. Unlike Kabuto or Itachi or Pain she doesn't have some awful series of atrocities to her name covered up with a sob story, at least no more than a career ninja always has. Really hoping she can get some kind of closure eventually even if it's just because Nobu gets tired of being so angry with her.
This scene really works on selling the sense of vertigo and denied validation.
Since the invasion we've had Nobunaga shifting through the wreckage of the attack which hit civilians, we've had him talking with Danzo before the memorial stone where he got a name for the Konoha ninja Baki killed and had the man's heroic sacrifice made real to him, we had the meeting with Yugao where the fact the dead are mourned - that she lost someone she loved and wants revenge is depicted. We had Nobunaga and Danzo talking where Nobunaga pointed out that no one on the Sand side of things tried to warn Leaf about the attack despite their alliance.
We've had whole chapters where the background anger of the population is present, everyone worked up to pay Sand - Sound back. And then the Sand Jonin who unabashedly killed Leaf Ninja and participated in the attack walks in and twenty minutes later the alliance is back on, see you later kid.
It's very well written and uses all the above to make the wait what? as the political reality sinks in more effective. In a chapter about the inherent shadiness of Ninja work and how once things look when the gloss comes off it's a great opening choice.
Nobunaga being kind of spoiled - not impressed by Naruto verse movie industry products because he remembers Earth's take which has had a lot longer to fine tune things and build on successes is a funny detail but this section also works on the level of kind scratching the romantic paint off the whole actual Naruto movie plotline.
In the movie if memory serves it was classic Shonen stuff, the plucky determined hero inspires the cynic to reclaim her legacy and beats the one dimensional bad guy with a rainbow powered Rasengan. Hidden Leaf accepts the mission because the bad guy is evil and everything works out.
Here the framing is through Nobunaga's eyes way more vaguely slimy: he has to lie to his teammates about the mission, Koyuki just wants a life away from her trauma but is having her autonomy taken away - choices denied to serve Konoha's interests, yes her Uncle is a nasty piece of work who is oppressing his nation but Hidden Leaf is taking action against him not in protest of his tyranny but because they want a valuable resource from his nation, if the guy had been smarter - more politically savy Nobunaga could easily have been hired to make sure Koyuki had a fatal ..... accident on said uncle's behalf.
Naruto was hyped to be on this mission and kept telling Koyuki to believe in herself etc but in contrast Nobunaga feels sick at the setup and feels sorry for Koyuki's being reduced to a pawn.
I like it. I like it a lot. Really curious to see how this arc goes.
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On the political notes, its interesting to see the downsides of being close to the realpolitik layer.
What is good for the national entities as a whole, (Sand and Leaf at peace and not tearing holes in each other) is painful for those affected by the clashes earlier. MC must be conflicted, because on one hand, he grew up in an orphanage, he's aware of the cost of war, on the other, personal tragedies reduced to senseless legacy costs are difficult to mentally operate around.
What is good for the national entities as a whole, (Sand and Leaf at peace and not tearing holes in each other) is painful for those affected by the clashes earlier. MC must be conflicted, because on one hand, he grew up in an orphanage, he's aware of the cost of war, on the other, personal tragedies reduced to senseless legacy costs are difficult to mentally operate around.
Rancorious
Continue? Yes or No.
Watch this become the trigger for Nobunaga's descent into villainy, leading to his eventual ideological clash with Naruto.
- Location
- Oblivion
It's going to be interesting to see what happens when he finds out the truth.
Especially given the mirrors to his own situation with Tsunade.
It could be kind of funny to see Nobu the 'villain' arguing for the dismantling of the mercenary model and making Konoha the Daimyo's tax funded military, winning over the saner Akatsuki members and the missing nin becoming the new big bad.
Nobunaga: Naruto the Ninja system is fundamentally dependent on and responsible for causing war, we need to break the sys...
Naruto: [Punch] I WILL BE HOKAGE! [Goes full Kyuubi]
He was made Chunin after the fact so you should still be embarrassed.
- Location
- Somewhere and Nowhere in a state of super-position
Maybe later, because of Nobunaga being semi-aware of what's going to happen to his mental state.
Maybe sooner, because he's been under stress his entire life.
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Tbh I get why people are siding with Nobunaga here but if I was him I'd be glad she didn't raise me, cuz damn is she a mess.
That said his childhood could've been handled better, there must have been someone they could trust to raise him… On the other hand I feel if he hadn't just been given up as an orphan it would be more likely for the Snake Bastard to know who he was which wouldn't be great.
All in all I don't really think there were many good options with Tsunade as a mother. I also struggle to judge Jiraiya for how he handled things, he's as much of a mess as her and his job isn't exactly family friendly. Tbh all of the Sannin are broken messes and none of them should be raising a kid.
That said his childhood could've been handled better, there must have been someone they could trust to raise him… On the other hand I feel if he hadn't just been given up as an orphan it would be more likely for the Snake Bastard to know who he was which wouldn't be great.
All in all I don't really think there were many good options with Tsunade as a mother. I also struggle to judge Jiraiya for how he handled things, he's as much of a mess as her and his job isn't exactly family friendly. Tbh all of the Sannin are broken messes and none of them should be raising a kid.
Its ninja land, im sure birth control or other options exist.
I can freely judge both Tsunade and Jiraiyra hard for being idiots thinking with their genitals, but that lines up with Canon too imo. Highly talented people, but idiots in certain areas regardless.
People who know or suspect that they would be poor parents for reasons of personality , career, or lifestyle, should simply not be parents at all. A child raised well *for the circumstances* can still be incredibly damaged due to those circumstances, regardless of the intent of the parents.
I may have strong feelings about the subject...
I can freely judge both Tsunade and Jiraiyra hard for being idiots thinking with their genitals, but that lines up with Canon too imo. Highly talented people, but idiots in certain areas regardless.
People who know or suspect that they would be poor parents for reasons of personality , career, or lifestyle, should simply not be parents at all. A child raised well *for the circumstances* can still be incredibly damaged due to those circumstances, regardless of the intent of the parents.
I may have strong feelings about the subject...
Tsunade, Jiriaya and a lot of ninja have very good reasons to not want to be the primary caregiver of a child but I'd have thought ninja would have culturally adapted to a lot of veterans being messed up parents. Some kind of communal clan childrearing, fostering volunteers and visitation arrangements maybe. Like have Nobunaga and Naruto raised in the Sarutobi clan by some civilian cousins giving them a stable environment and making an effort to visit and teach them when they're emotionally able to. Just dumping them in an orphanage is fucked up, but maybe the system is just so over-strained that industrial orphan barns are the best that Konoha can do. I doubt it though.
21. Don't Stop Believin'
Chapter Twenty-One - Don't Stop Believin'
One thing that hadn't changed between lifetimes - I still got very seasick for my first voyage.
It took nearly two days to get my sea legs. Two long, horrible, terrible, no-good days.
Neji had adjusted the best out of all of us, until the first time he used the Byakugan on the open water. Then he was right next to me. And worse.
"I take back everything I said," he moaned, retching into a bucket.
"You didn't say anything," I reminded him, my stomach too weak to reciprocate.
"...I thought them," he admitted.
"You can do this!" Lee shouted, standing over the both of us. "You can beat this! We are ninja! We are strong! We have the power of youth!"
Had we the strength, we might have actually killed him for those remarks. Of course, had we the strength, we wouldn't have wanted to; a wonderful little paradox.
There were two alleviating factors during our bout of seasickness - the first was that there was very little call for ninja on the ship; no danger, and little shooting to be done. Gai was also apparently seasick - but he'd somehow managed to get the cast fawning over him; then again, he was a fan - probably shared some of his exploits, gave them ideas for lines or something. Our jonin could be charming, in a very over the top way. The second, was that our principal was resting, and didn't see our own relative weakness, because that would have been horribly embarrassing.
So on the third day - or rather, the middle of the second evening - both Neji and I had recovered, and I could actually keep some of the thin ship's gruel that the quartermaster trusted me with down. There was actual gourmet catering, to be clear - I just wasn't allowed anywhere near it for the time being. But not only that, but a few hours later, the princess was awake and after a minor freakout at being shanghai'd, realized she wasn't getting out of her contract.
"Quiet on the set!"
Nobody on Team Gai knew the plot of the movie that was being filmed; we'd asked, but we weren't permitted access to any copies of the script. The director had very emphatically refused, and used the terms "union" and "contract" very liberally, as if it were an invocation of protection against our request. Which, if this world was anything like my prior life's film industry… yeah, just a little.
Still, they'd done up one of the main supporting actors in fake blood and arrow shafts and Koyuki was in one of the damaged princess outfits, so what this particular scene was going to be about seemed pretty obvious.
"Action!"
…Maybe I'd judged Koyuki's performance in her first movie - and Heart of Heaven had been her first blockbuster - too harshly. In person, not fifteen feet away from the camera, she brought a true sense of grief and sorrow to the scene that I wouldn't have expected from that cinematic abomination. Maybe it was the lack of an overwrought soundtrack to drown out the subtleties and nuances of her expression amidst insistently tugging strings, or perhaps she truly had grown in her understanding of her craft.
"-Cut!" the actress suddenly cried out, of her own initiative, breaking character, and Princess Fūun abruptly transformed back into Koyuki beckoning to her agent. "Sandayu - I need my teardrops!"
"Eh?!" Lee was dumbstruck. "What's this?!"
I shrugged. "How many takes do you think they're going to have?" I pointed out. "She can't actually cry for each of them."
"She could just get it right the first time," Neji stated firmly, as if that was that.
"Neji, you know better," I shook my head. "There are any number of-"
"-Quiet on the set!" The director shouted through his bullhorn. "Action!"
"Shishimaru!"
Besides Sandayu, Koyuki didn't interact with anyone outside of working hours, so when filming was done and meals weren't being served it was our job to stand guard outside her door. In theory, we also had to have someone inside her cabin with her at all times, but our principal was not inclined to allow three teenagers and an older gentleman that kind of access; instead, we had to be content with sweeping her room prior to her entry.
As for Sandayu himself, our client refused to discuss any particulars until we reached the Land of Snow properly. He insisted that once the princess saw the suffering of her people, that she would see the need for her to assume the throne, and from there, the liberation of the country would surely follow. The man was an old-school, dyed the wool monarchist - the kind I'd never met before in either of my lives, yet Gai had nodded along as if these sorts of people weren't absolutely bugnuts insane, so apparently they weren't complete unicorns. Or my jonin was just that professional. Probably both.
But our trip aboard the sailing vessel the film production had chartered was mostly uneventful, and even somewhat tedious.
"Hey Nobunaga," Lee asked me during one of our night shifts. "What are you going to do with the money?"
"Eh?" I blinked, then tried to pull my thoughts back together from half-remembered lyrics and chords. Guarding Koyuki on the ship was not an incredibly taxing job - and while we probably should be on full and clear alert, this was a closed circle. The danger would start when we hit land, not on the boat.
"The money," Lee repeated. "Do you have any plans?"
This was an S-ranked mission. At minimum, the payout for an S-rank was One. Million. Ryou. Even if we had to split it - and we didn't know if we had to split it - that was a lot of goddamn money. And we didn't know if this was the minimum-wage kinda mission; Lee probably thought it was. I honestly couldn't say. S-ranks were supposed to be for "state-level confidential matters of high importance" - was a coup d'etat a minimum? A standard? Extraordinary? How many S-ranks were there per year?
"Ah… not really," I admitted. "Why? Do you?"
"I'm going to get a new set of weights," he bobbed his head rapidly up and down.
"Nice!" I fistbumped him. "...That's it though, buddy? Seems a bit small for a payday like this."
Lee let out a nervous little laugh. "Well, I need to get my savings back up. I, ah, needed to pay a huge fine to the Nara clan after, ah, you know. Neji was a huge help with that." He lowered his voice even more. "Shikamaru doesn't know. Please don't tell him."
I let out an honest chuckle at that. "Secret's safe with me, Lee."
Rock Lee, accidental poacher. What a world.
"But you have to have something cool," he insisted. "You can tell me, I can keep a secret!"
I shrugged helplessly. "Honestly, Lee? The things I want from this world… money can't really buy the- did you hear that?"
The pleasant little diversion was dropped, and my genin's shoulders settled as he closed his eyes.
"Yes," he confirmed. "It's in Fujikaze-san's room!"
As ranking ninja, I had a copy of the key - Lee assumed a martial stance as I produced it.
"On three," I whispered. "One, two - three!"
The door opened - Lee and I burst into the dark room, ready for violence. A dark form tried to streak past us; frantic in its retreat; on the far side of the room, a formerly sleeping female was jolted awake, yowling at the interruption.
"Got it!" Lee cried in triumph.
"What are you doing?!" Koyuki cried out, clutching her sheets to her form. Not that she was at all indecent - the princess was in her nightclothes. White silk - very fetching. "Get out!"
"Squeak!" chirruped the rat that my teammate had caught.
Her resulting screams woke up the entire ship, and did nothing to endear us further to her.
The only other incident of note was during a day shift, where Neji and I were guarding her. I was taking the opportunity to get some tonkori practice in, when she decided to open the door, archly inform me I was playing the instrument wrong, and then slam it in my face.
"Not a word, Neji," I informed my smirking companion tiredly. "Not a word."
Three days before the Admiral Perry (not actually the ship's name, but what I'd privately taken to calling the vessel) was due to land in port, one of the producers screamed at the director that an island had appeared in front of us.
"Director! This is terrible!"
It wasn't actually an island - it was an iceberg at least a mile long, with a giant jagged double-peaked spire at its center.
"What is this," Makino breathed, the words crystallizing in front of him. The further into the arctic seas we sailed, the colder it had gotten; luckily, Team Gai had come prepared with coats and cloaks and jackets; I don't think that even our jonin would have done well with his usual bodysuit.
"W-when I woke up this morning, our path was blocked!" the producer stammered out. "What shall we do?"
The director laughed. "This is it!" he exclaimed. "This island… this scenery… this movie - it will change everything!" The man snapped his fingers, and the production immediately snapped to attention - as if they weren't hanging on to his every word already. "Ready the, uh, smaller boats," the man ordered. "We film our first encounter with Ushimao here! This location is perfect!"
"Eh?!"
"You fool!" The director thundered. "When things like this happen, we praise the generosity of the spirits, for the Movie Gods have descended to bless our production! Everyone! Prepare to disembark!"
As security for the princess, naturally we objected. The director of the project overruled us. We went.
Thankfully, traditional period costuming did not prevent strategic placement of heating pads or long underwear for the actors and actresses; nor did it disallow the use of fur (quite to the contrary). It took another two or three hours to disembark, set up the production, and then another half hour to "get the right angles" but this crew appeared to know their director well enough to understand what he wanted. Probably. I had no idea what the proper pace for such things was.
Whatever the case, by noon, the actor playing Ushimao (a very kind man, kept showing everyone pictures of his newborn grandchildren) was standing atop a ridge, laughing maniacally and doing his best Rita Repulsa impersonation (unfortunately inadequate) when -
"Noriyuki!" Gai shouted. "Get down!"
"Eh?" The old man squinted. "Wha-"
The jonin sprinted forward, and tackled the man, just as a spike of ice erupted from the ground - it would have split him in two.
Not twenty feet away from where he stood, a lavender-haired man in white-and-blue garb (including a cross between a forehead protector and a ushanka hat) threw off a dropcloth.
"Welcome to the Land of Snow," he sneered.
A giggling, young woman, pink-hair barely visible under her own forehead protector-cum-hat, wearing similar garb and with some sort of wrist-mounted launcher on her left hand, was now standing to our left. "I welcome you, Princess Koyuki. You did bring the Hex Crystal, didn't you?"
I heard the princess' breath catch in her throat, even as I instinctively moved to block her from their line of sight.
"Don't worry," I murmured, even as Subtitles designating each newcomer as targets One and Two respectively appeared in my frame of vision.
A third, big, burly, with a cyborg arm (what the fuck?!) tunneled in from the ground to our right - we were surrounded, our backs to the sea and our jonin exposed. "You've come this far, but no further," he rumbled. "Too bad for you…."
Gai immediately seized the actor in one hand and lept backwards, returning him (and more importantly, himself) to the relative safety of the film production and his team. "Everyone!" Gai called out. "Return to the ship!"
<Yuki-Nin> Gai noted. <Remain on your guard. Protect the princess. Standard team tactics. Fighting retreat.>
"No chatter?" The first nin shook his head slowly. "What a pity. The last Konoha ninja I fought had more personality to him… Fubuki, Mizore - take care of Princess Koyuki."
For all that we had trained in single combat while preparing for the chunin exams, Team Gai had practiced extensively working as part of a well-oiled machine. And for all that I decried the concept of being the "squishy backline caster" - that was my role in this formation: relative to my teammates, my focus had been on non-combat, non-taijutsu jutsu. So as part of a team, staying back and throwing out Flashbangs, Censor Bars, and the occasional senbon was perfectly reasonable - and if anyone was dumb enough to think that meant that they should close the distance with me?
Then I could have fun myself.
Gai moved to engage the first nin, their clear jonin equivalent; that left us with his two subordinates.
"Stay behind us," I warned the actors. "In fact, why are you still here! Back to the fucking ship! Move! Move!"
The fat one reached behind his back and pulled out something that looked very much like a snowboard - stepping on it and beginning his glide downhill, he was sure to quickly build up momentum.
All that kinetic energy would be useless without proper direction, though.
<Lee, take him down!>
Censor Bar no Jutsu!
-And yet, the familiar black bar didn't form - as Lee lept to kick what he believed would be a blinded and off-balance foe, the big man easily laughed and blocked the blow. My teammate's eyes widened; it was only my bushy-browed friend's skill in taijutsu that turned what could have been a disaster into a stalemate. He narrowly avoided a counter-grab, jabbed into the man's ribs with a quick one-two sequence of fists, and rolled away, all in the span of seconds.
But the big man was still coming.
"Hyoton: Swallow Snow Storm!"
A swarm of icy birds flew from the ground near Pinkie towards me.
Flashbang no Jutsu!
Once again, though - nothing. I could feel the chakra leaving me, but she wasn't affected in the slightest. Why?
Cursing, I dove for the ground, rolling so that I never stood still, heard the muffled thump of several of the birds hitting the ground around me - lucky me.
No - not lucky. Not all the birds had gotten got.
Homing jutsu - she was probably concentrating on it. Which meant that flashbang really should have been devastating.
I felt Neji at my back.
"Eight Trigrams Palms Revolving Heaven!" he cried out, and her technique was no longer an immediate problem.
"Oooh," she cooed. "Nice move."
<Checking the locals> I sent. <Genjutsu not working.>
<Understood.>
Neji advanced back into the fight as I retreated further - and wonder of wonders, it looked like we had competent individuals who listened to their security partners for once. Stage lights and coffee carafes and other miscellaneous things had been left behind (but not cameras or film, I noticed) in a showing that would make an environmentalist weep, but they people were mostly to the boats… with one notable exception.
"Princess?" I sighed. "Princess? Princess!"
She was unresponsive. No, looking at her it was worse that that. It was in her eyes, the way her pupils darted at around while her body simply stood there trembling.
"Oh fuck," I breathed. "I am sorry, I am so sorry, princess."
The woman was having a panic attack in the middle of a fight.
"Ice Prison no Jutsu!" I heard the faint cry in the distance.
<Chakra armor.> Gai reported. <Blocks all ninjutsu or genjutsu->
<Well shit,> I sent out. <Sorry, Lee. I guess you'd better surrender now->
Even at this distance, I heard his laugh, slightly broken, a little deranged. And then the crash of a punch enhanced by at least… a few Gates impacting metal.
"Mizore!" One of the Snow nin cried out.
Not my current concern.
"Hey," I said softly, reaching to touch Koyuki's arm. "Come on. We're going on a boat now, okay? We're going for a boat ride now. Follow me."
<Princess in critical condition. Need to withdraw from fight.>
<Enemy also in retreat. Holding ground.>
A narwhal made of ice was apparently covering their retreat, and the ice around us was literally cracking so… I believed Gai broadly but not literally.
"Boat?" she breathed, the words coming as if from a great distance. "Where… are… we… going?"
"It's a surprise," I told her, taking her by a gloved hand. "Don't worry. You'll be fine. You'll be safe."
"Sur…prise?" it would be a lie to call the expression she gave a smile. "Not… snow… I… don't… want… Land… of… Sn…." She collapsed like a puppet whose strings had been cut, but I was ready for that; I caught her before she hit the ground; one hand cradling her head, fingers spread over her soft, raven hair.
"I know," I told her unhearing form. "Believe me, I know."
I carried Koyuki to her cabin on the ship, set her still in costume atop her covers. At her bedside table was the Hex Crystal one of the Yuki-nin had spoken of - a dark gray shard on a leather thong, its facets sparkling in the harsh, cold sunlight.
Once it was verified that nobody was seriously injured, and everyone's wounds were treated, the director, the producer, Sandayu, and Team Gai held an emergency meeting.
"How much of this did you know?" The producer - whose name I still couldn't quite recall - demanded.
"All of it," Sandayu's posture remained perfectly upright. "There was no other way to get the princess to return to this country."
"Ah, excuse me," Lee interjected. "But what is actually going on here?"
"I should have known," Neji sighed. "No actress is worth an S-rank payout."
"I just assumed that the Number One actress was worth the extra service," Lee was perhaps just a tad indignant.
Gai looked at me meaningfully. As a chunin, it was my job to manage the genin; as jonin, it was his to manage the mission writ large. This, too, was training.
"No," I murmured, reluctantly. "That is not our mandate, gentlemen."
"Indeed not," Sandayu confirmed, to one shocked and one poker face. "I asked the Leaf for assistance in the liberation of my people from the tyrant who stole Koyuki-sama's birthright ten years ago, and your Hokage graciously accepted."
The producer blinked. "You're from the Land of Snow, Sandayu?"
"Oh, yes," the man said, and explained his history as a retainer in Lord Kazahana's court, intertwining it with that of his country. When the coup happened, he'd been overseas trying to secure financing; he'd thought the princess lost along with the castle when the coup had occurred, but when he had found her acting on stage as a teenager, his heart had soared.
"And now," he continued, tears streaming down his face. "We have a chance to strike back! To make right that grievous wrong!"
"I should have died then," came the cool voice of the princess herself. We all turned to face her: Kazahana Koyuki, her arms crossed, a pink parka draped over her nightclothes and open disdain upon face. "Why did you bring me back here just to die once more, Sandayu?"
"Y-you must not say such things!" he stammered. "Our greatest hope was that our princess was still alive!"
"Alive," she chuckled darkly. "Yes. I am alive."
"O-hime-sama," Sandayu stated. "I have served you, I have been your agent, I have bided my time for this day - where I could escort you back to your land and your people."
I let out a low, nervous little chuckle - Koyuki's eyes flicked towards me, a glittering of amusement echoing between us.
Sandayu rose to his feet to stand in front of his liege lady, and then got to his knees, his forehead touching the wooden planks of the ship. "O-hime-sama! I implore you. Please! Free your people! Overthrow Doto! Take your place as the rightful leader of this country! I will give my life to protect you! Please! Take up arms and stand with us!"
I felt incredibly uncomfortable watching this moment - this wasn't for us. And there was only one answer that the woman would give.
Koyuki merely stood over Sandayu, refusing to speak, letting the silence fill the space and distance between mistress and servant.
"...No," she stated flatly, in a tone I recognized all too well.
Some damn fool started laughing "Yeah!" they said. "Fuck the Land of Snow!"
Long repressed fury flashed in Koyuki's eyes. "My people are suffering under my uncle's rule!" she snapped.
"So what," I laughed. "You don't care. They're not your people any more… Fujikaze-san."
"...that's right," she scoffed, no longer leaning against the frame, her body posture ramrod straight. "I don't. They're not." She nodded. "I don't," she repeated, softly.
Whirling around, she slammed the door behind her, footsteps thudding like cannonballs as she retreated; Sandayu still kowtowing to the closed slab of wood.
"Nobunaga," Lee was dumbfounded. "How could you say something like that?"
Neji was nodding thoughtfully; Gai and the director had exchanged a meaningful look or two.
"We are able to dream, because we don't give up hope," Makino murmured, cackling. "We are able to dream, and that's why we have a future!"
"D-director?" Sandayu, still kneeling turned to face the older gentleman.
"It's from Princess Fuun's dramatic Act 2 speech!" he said. "It's one of the most dramatic moments in the movie we're filming!"
"You haven't allowed us a copy of the script," Neji pointed out.
"Oh," he shrugged. "Right. Well - in any case. The show must go on."
"Director!" the producer was completely flabbergasted. "You-you're not planning on-"
"Continuing to film," Makino insisted. "Yes! The footage from the fight between ninja! Priceless! The behind the scenes footage from this film alone? I might just get Best Documentary in addition to Best Picture this year!"
"Y-you've never gotten Best Picture!"
"After that stunt with the archers during the death scene, the union put the thumbscrews to me! But now… the action sequences for this film will be stupendous! The effects! True! This will change everything!"
Makino was wasted as a director. He should have become an evil genius.
"B-but-"
"Think about it," he cajoled. "How often can you make a movie with a real princess as the star - and advertise it that way?"
"The publicity…." The producer was now on board - ryou signs in his eyes. "This film is going to be a hit!"
"That Yuki-nin claimed he had made Kakashi retreat," Gai rumbled. "Defeating him would cement a victory over my eternal rival."
"We are on a sailing ship," I noted, more pragmatically. "They can cut off our retreat at any time."
Ice Release in arctic water. Yeah. The only way out was through.
There was just one final thing.
"If you are going to be filming us," I stated. "Then shouldn't we be classified as actors ourselves? Stuntpeople at the very least? Special effects?" I tapped on the table. "Let's talk residuals, old man."
"I-it's all covered in your ninja contract," Sandayu stammered, getting back on his feet.
I looked at Gai, who shrugged. "What's a 'residual?'"
The producer had never looked happier.
"...I'm going to go check on the princess," I sighed, and left to go do just that.
"Man," I heard Makino faintly through the door as I left, "You must have your hands full with that one. The kid's a shark! A shark!"
Koyuki remained sullen and uncooperative, but that was nothing new.
But I learned that the Land of Snow.
Had.
Snowmobiles.
No, that was a lie.
They had. Snowmobile. Trucks.
What the actual fuck.
"Oh, o-Kazahana-denka loved his little gizmos," had been the answer I'd gotten, and that was all that I could wrangle out of Sandayu. "I was actually overseas, trying to sell more debt for more of his strange ideas when he was betrayed."
I could have screamed; I didn't.
"...I'm going to check on the princess," is what I said instead.
Now that we were in confirmed hostile territory, she was no longer alone at any time. Out of respect for decency, we turned our backs for the sake of hygiene, but that was it. And if she didn't like it - or like us? So be it.
We climbed up a mountainous road, and approached the gaping maw of a large cave.
"Beyond this great cave," Sandayu stated, during a strategy meeting, "is the hideout of our resistance against Doto. We'll pass through after filming. Everyone is anxiously awaiting the princess's triumphant return.
"Years ago," he continued. "Before the coup, there was a railroad through here."
Lee frowned. "A railroad?"
A goddamn railroad?!
Yeah. Nobody else seemed to know what Sandayu was talking about, and Sandayu didn't even realize it himself.
"It's surely covered with icicles now," he continued. "But there are tracks beneath the ice. It was used to convey ore from the mines to the refineries, and ingots to our port city, you see."
A valuable commodity. Transportation and logistics. Infrastructure. Patterns falling into place.
"...So we're near the capital, then?" I asked.
"Oh, yes," he nodded. "It's just-"
"I need to do reconnaissance," I cut him off perhaps more brusquely than I ought to. "Confirm a theory. I don't like this. We're too close. Neji - keep your Byakugan up. I'll inform Lee that he'll be taking a double shift."
He wouldn't like it, but I had to know.
"Yes, Nobunaga!" I was right - he didn't like it. But Lee was a good friend, and a better soldier.
"...No."
Our principal, on the other hand, was neither.
"...Excuse me?"
"I said, 'no." She glared at me. "I'm coming with you."
"Princess," I began. "There is-"
"I know the area," she cut me off. "My scenes aren't being shot today. And if you don't take me with you, then I'll escape anyway. I can make your life difficult in a thousand ways, and I will. You want me as daimyo of the Land of Snow, right? Then don't make me an enemy."
Good to know that I wasn't already an enemy after the way I'd been treating her. Although, she was an actress - and they were splendid liars, actresses. It was like it was their job or something.
And she did make a few good arguments. That should be rewarded, even if they were blackmail.
"...Fine," I conceded. "Lee, you'll be with me-"
"No," she insisted. "Just you."
"Princess,I can't guaranteed your safety-"
"It's just reconnaissance," she threw my words back in my face. "And besides. I thought Konoha ninja were supposed to be the best."
"...You will do exactly what I say," I informed her. "No questions, no backtalk, no nothing, until we return to camp. I know several very painful jutsu that will not leave any marks or lasting harm and I will use them on you if you are obstreperous, because I would rather have you as an enemy than as a corpse. Do you understand?"
Her eyes met mine, cool blue against my own. "I understand, ninja."
"Uzumaki Nobunaga," I informed her. "Let's be off."
And so the two of us set out, traipsing through the woods; I'd borrowed a white dropcloth for her, as her usual pinks weren't very camouflage.
"What kind of trees are these, anyway," I muttered, as we continued along our way - I needed one with sturdy enough branches, and none of these seemed to have them.
"Pine," she answered. "This is a new growth forest used for timber. We cycle through them radially. We also have maple and spruce."
"Mmmm," I grunted, still trying to find a one I could get a good grip on and failing.
"You're an idiot, you know," she told me with practiced nonchalance. "When I get back, all I'm going to do is act on camera. I won't do anything else."
"Not my problem," I shrugged. "That's between you and the director."
"Oh? No lectures about duty?" She sniffed, either in distaste or just from the cold. "I thought you ninja got off on that sort of thing."
"Lady," I sighed. "You're not a ninja, and I'd be an idiot to expect you to act like one."
I flicked my gaze over to her. Her teeth were gritted; she was trying to get a dig in somewhere.
"...Well, good then," was her sullen little reply.
We continued our search in silence, for a short time.
"Why are you even doing this?" she asked, and she seemed at least a little curious.
"Because I'm lazy," I informed her.
"Eh?" I could hear her frown, the way the gears in her head tried to process that statement. "Come again?"
"Well, your dad got coup'd," I began, and her polite smile turned brittle. "There's a reason for that, besides your uncle being overly ambitious. Something about this land allowed him to make himself daimyo. And I want to know what that is."
"Why?"
"Because I don't want you to get murdered two, three… five years down the line," I said shortly. "Means that all the work I'm doing now will have been wasted, and I'll look bad. So I'm going to see what made his coup work, put a pin in that problem, and then once you're on the throne, get to sit back and drink in the praise. See? Laziness."
I grinned to myself; she made an unimpressed noise that I would not term a grunt - this was a lady, after all.
"...You don't even care if I become daimyo, do you," she accused me at last, and with that comment, I finally turned to face her.
That got a sardonic little chuckle out of me. "Please," I scoffed. "You want it."
"How."
"Because you'll live in a gilded palace, waited on hand and foot by a small army of attendants," I stated. "You'll want for nothing. All you have to do is say words written by other people, in a role you can interpret however you like. Steady work, for the rest of your life. An actresses' dream role: custom fit. Just. For. You."
Her breath quickened at my description.
"You have no idea what ruling is like." Her words were colder than the snow around us.
"No, that's exactly what ruling is like," I countered. "If you don't care. And you don't care."
She let out a sound that was half-laugh, half… I wasn't sure. Or maybe I was.
"Daimyo of a poor land." She slumped against a pine whose quills had been shattered somehow. "Queen of a broken people - I don't. I can't."
"This land wasn't poor," I murmured. "This land was wealthy beyond all imagining."
"My father beggared this nation with trinkets a-and frippery," she shot back, nearly choking out the words. "E-everyone knows that."
Yeah, but "everyone" wasn't in this fucking goddamn forest with us, now were they? What the fuck did "everyone" know about fucking anything?
"Your father was a genius" I hissed, and her eyes widened at my words; she nearly slipped off her tree. "who understood the keys to true development - to freedom."
There weren't any trees with convenient branches - but, though I was still sometimes too used to the conventions of my previous life, that wasn't an actual impediment. I walked straight up the trunk of the tallest tree in the arena, and looked out across the valley towards the capital.
Staring at one of the buildings in the distance, I fished out a pair of binoculars from my scroll, and peered at it closer. It was being used as a military barracks - but from the positioning of the doors, the windows, it hadn't originally been designed that way. I nodded to myself in satisfaction, and put the binoculars away.
I lept down, and with the assistance of chakra landed softly, only a puff of snow scattering to mark my descent.
"This country is 'poor,'" I continued, and it was a miracle that the snow did not melt in a five-foot radius around me, "because your idiot uncle has forced it into autarky for ten fucking years, and let its industry and comparative advantages wither on the vine in the name of bullshit Juche fucking shitty fuckity… fuck."
I was getting too worked up; I closed my eyes, took in a deep breath, softened my voice.
"Guns versus butter, and your father chose churns. Tell me about the university."
"The what?" she pretended to be nonchalant, but I knew better.
"He must have told you about it, right?" I squinted at her. "A… school, a great school. Or an institute. Or a library. A place, a building to attract scholars from-"
"-all around the world," she finished, blinking at me like she'd never seen me before. "How did you-"
"He understood the resource curse," I breathed.
Oh, but this had been a beautiful country before it had gotten covered in utter and complete bullshit.
"...You're crying," she said, staring. "I thought ninja weren't allowed to cry."
It was snowing, just a little - faint flurries and snowflakes kissing my hair and shoulders and face. I touched the corner of my eye, and it was wet.
"...Yeah," I sighed. "Yeah, I guess I am."
"Well what do you know, anyway," she puffed herself back up. "Y-you never even met him!"
"No, but I can see his vision," I corrected her. "And-"
"You see someone's vision, you see half of who they are," she finished for me.
Now it was my turn to squint at her. "Only half?"
She raised a sardonic eyebrow. "The other half," she explained patiently, "is the people that they surround themselves with."
"Then why are you so alone, princess?"
Her mouth opened, and no words came out. Her gaze turned to the ground, one arm clutching at the other.
"...I'm sorry," I said at last. "That was-"
In the distance, there was a sound that I had heard in this lifetime. A steady puffing, chuffing sound. A rhythmic clacking of wheels and pistons and locomotion. And then… a steam whistle.
The princess and I looked dead on at each other.
"Train," we whispered.
"Back to the camp."
There must be something wrong with me, to look upon the aftermath of a massacre and have only two words run through my mind.
Strategic assets.
The Resistance had rammed logs into the side of the train and onto the tracks - tried to charge into the belly of the beast. Brave men, patriots one and all.
They had died wholesale.
Lee and Neji filled me in on the details - the train was armed with some manner of contraption - a crank of a lever, and hundreds of kunai had flown at great speed. With Eight Trigrams Palms Revolving Heaven, Neji had managed to hold back one barrage - for one section of the charge. But that had still broken the advance.
Gai and Lee had moved offensively - Gate-enhanced punches had crippled the kunai launches, taken out train cars. But the locomotive itself had escaped.
"Sandayu!" Koyuki rushed forward heedless of my warnings, the white dropcloth falling to the ground, searching among the dead and dying for her retainer and agent. "Sandayu!"
"Here! Princess! Here!"
The man was alive, his battered old armor incongruous with his pince-nez. The man was bleeding from multiple cuts - shrapnel and ricochets; one of his lenses was shattered; his face was pale and he looked as if he'd aged three decades in the hours since we'd left. But he was alive, and none of his injuries were serious.
The same could not be said of his comrades, of what hade been hundreds who had apparently sworn and given their lives in the hopes of overthrowing Doto.
"Sandayu!" she wept tearlessly. "You're alive!"
Her hand cracked across his face.
"You idiot!" she cried, the carnage and cawing of crows her soundtrack. "This! Is what happens after defying Doto! All your idealism! All your promises of revolution and restoration! This is a land without spring! Without hope! And you will die with these men if you stay here!"
Her eyes scrunched together, as she choked back a sob.
"Let's go home." She sounded every one of her eighteen years.
"Princess," I warned, catching up to her. "We still have-"
"No!" she shot back. "We don't! You can just-"
It all happened so quickly.
A noise - a premonition? Something caused me to grab her by the wrist, seconds before she was yanked into the air. A grappling hook - no, a prosthetic arm, still gleaming had snagged her by the waist, and I was too stubborn to let go, as a goddamn airship rose into the air.
And us with it.
Into the belly of the beast we went.
One thing that hadn't changed between lifetimes - I still got very seasick for my first voyage.
It took nearly two days to get my sea legs. Two long, horrible, terrible, no-good days.
Neji had adjusted the best out of all of us, until the first time he used the Byakugan on the open water. Then he was right next to me. And worse.
"I take back everything I said," he moaned, retching into a bucket.
"You didn't say anything," I reminded him, my stomach too weak to reciprocate.
"...I thought them," he admitted.
"You can do this!" Lee shouted, standing over the both of us. "You can beat this! We are ninja! We are strong! We have the power of youth!"
Had we the strength, we might have actually killed him for those remarks. Of course, had we the strength, we wouldn't have wanted to; a wonderful little paradox.
There were two alleviating factors during our bout of seasickness - the first was that there was very little call for ninja on the ship; no danger, and little shooting to be done. Gai was also apparently seasick - but he'd somehow managed to get the cast fawning over him; then again, he was a fan - probably shared some of his exploits, gave them ideas for lines or something. Our jonin could be charming, in a very over the top way. The second, was that our principal was resting, and didn't see our own relative weakness, because that would have been horribly embarrassing.
So on the third day - or rather, the middle of the second evening - both Neji and I had recovered, and I could actually keep some of the thin ship's gruel that the quartermaster trusted me with down. There was actual gourmet catering, to be clear - I just wasn't allowed anywhere near it for the time being. But not only that, but a few hours later, the princess was awake and after a minor freakout at being shanghai'd, realized she wasn't getting out of her contract.
"Quiet on the set!"
Nobody on Team Gai knew the plot of the movie that was being filmed; we'd asked, but we weren't permitted access to any copies of the script. The director had very emphatically refused, and used the terms "union" and "contract" very liberally, as if it were an invocation of protection against our request. Which, if this world was anything like my prior life's film industry… yeah, just a little.
Still, they'd done up one of the main supporting actors in fake blood and arrow shafts and Koyuki was in one of the damaged princess outfits, so what this particular scene was going to be about seemed pretty obvious.
"Action!"
…Maybe I'd judged Koyuki's performance in her first movie - and Heart of Heaven had been her first blockbuster - too harshly. In person, not fifteen feet away from the camera, she brought a true sense of grief and sorrow to the scene that I wouldn't have expected from that cinematic abomination. Maybe it was the lack of an overwrought soundtrack to drown out the subtleties and nuances of her expression amidst insistently tugging strings, or perhaps she truly had grown in her understanding of her craft.
"-Cut!" the actress suddenly cried out, of her own initiative, breaking character, and Princess Fūun abruptly transformed back into Koyuki beckoning to her agent. "Sandayu - I need my teardrops!"
"Eh?!" Lee was dumbstruck. "What's this?!"
I shrugged. "How many takes do you think they're going to have?" I pointed out. "She can't actually cry for each of them."
"She could just get it right the first time," Neji stated firmly, as if that was that.
"Neji, you know better," I shook my head. "There are any number of-"
"-Quiet on the set!" The director shouted through his bullhorn. "Action!"
"Shishimaru!"
Besides Sandayu, Koyuki didn't interact with anyone outside of working hours, so when filming was done and meals weren't being served it was our job to stand guard outside her door. In theory, we also had to have someone inside her cabin with her at all times, but our principal was not inclined to allow three teenagers and an older gentleman that kind of access; instead, we had to be content with sweeping her room prior to her entry.
As for Sandayu himself, our client refused to discuss any particulars until we reached the Land of Snow properly. He insisted that once the princess saw the suffering of her people, that she would see the need for her to assume the throne, and from there, the liberation of the country would surely follow. The man was an old-school, dyed the wool monarchist - the kind I'd never met before in either of my lives, yet Gai had nodded along as if these sorts of people weren't absolutely bugnuts insane, so apparently they weren't complete unicorns. Or my jonin was just that professional. Probably both.
But our trip aboard the sailing vessel the film production had chartered was mostly uneventful, and even somewhat tedious.
"Hey Nobunaga," Lee asked me during one of our night shifts. "What are you going to do with the money?"
"Eh?" I blinked, then tried to pull my thoughts back together from half-remembered lyrics and chords. Guarding Koyuki on the ship was not an incredibly taxing job - and while we probably should be on full and clear alert, this was a closed circle. The danger would start when we hit land, not on the boat.
"The money," Lee repeated. "Do you have any plans?"
This was an S-ranked mission. At minimum, the payout for an S-rank was One. Million. Ryou. Even if we had to split it - and we didn't know if we had to split it - that was a lot of goddamn money. And we didn't know if this was the minimum-wage kinda mission; Lee probably thought it was. I honestly couldn't say. S-ranks were supposed to be for "state-level confidential matters of high importance" - was a coup d'etat a minimum? A standard? Extraordinary? How many S-ranks were there per year?
"Ah… not really," I admitted. "Why? Do you?"
"I'm going to get a new set of weights," he bobbed his head rapidly up and down.
"Nice!" I fistbumped him. "...That's it though, buddy? Seems a bit small for a payday like this."
Lee let out a nervous little laugh. "Well, I need to get my savings back up. I, ah, needed to pay a huge fine to the Nara clan after, ah, you know. Neji was a huge help with that." He lowered his voice even more. "Shikamaru doesn't know. Please don't tell him."
I let out an honest chuckle at that. "Secret's safe with me, Lee."
Rock Lee, accidental poacher. What a world.
"But you have to have something cool," he insisted. "You can tell me, I can keep a secret!"
I shrugged helplessly. "Honestly, Lee? The things I want from this world… money can't really buy the- did you hear that?"
The pleasant little diversion was dropped, and my genin's shoulders settled as he closed his eyes.
"Yes," he confirmed. "It's in Fujikaze-san's room!"
As ranking ninja, I had a copy of the key - Lee assumed a martial stance as I produced it.
"On three," I whispered. "One, two - three!"
The door opened - Lee and I burst into the dark room, ready for violence. A dark form tried to streak past us; frantic in its retreat; on the far side of the room, a formerly sleeping female was jolted awake, yowling at the interruption.
"Got it!" Lee cried in triumph.
"What are you doing?!" Koyuki cried out, clutching her sheets to her form. Not that she was at all indecent - the princess was in her nightclothes. White silk - very fetching. "Get out!"
"Squeak!" chirruped the rat that my teammate had caught.
Her resulting screams woke up the entire ship, and did nothing to endear us further to her.
The only other incident of note was during a day shift, where Neji and I were guarding her. I was taking the opportunity to get some tonkori practice in, when she decided to open the door, archly inform me I was playing the instrument wrong, and then slam it in my face.
"Not a word, Neji," I informed my smirking companion tiredly. "Not a word."
Three days before the Admiral Perry (not actually the ship's name, but what I'd privately taken to calling the vessel) was due to land in port, one of the producers screamed at the director that an island had appeared in front of us.
"Director! This is terrible!"
It wasn't actually an island - it was an iceberg at least a mile long, with a giant jagged double-peaked spire at its center.
"What is this," Makino breathed, the words crystallizing in front of him. The further into the arctic seas we sailed, the colder it had gotten; luckily, Team Gai had come prepared with coats and cloaks and jackets; I don't think that even our jonin would have done well with his usual bodysuit.
"W-when I woke up this morning, our path was blocked!" the producer stammered out. "What shall we do?"
The director laughed. "This is it!" he exclaimed. "This island… this scenery… this movie - it will change everything!" The man snapped his fingers, and the production immediately snapped to attention - as if they weren't hanging on to his every word already. "Ready the, uh, smaller boats," the man ordered. "We film our first encounter with Ushimao here! This location is perfect!"
"Eh?!"
"You fool!" The director thundered. "When things like this happen, we praise the generosity of the spirits, for the Movie Gods have descended to bless our production! Everyone! Prepare to disembark!"
As security for the princess, naturally we objected. The director of the project overruled us. We went.
Thankfully, traditional period costuming did not prevent strategic placement of heating pads or long underwear for the actors and actresses; nor did it disallow the use of fur (quite to the contrary). It took another two or three hours to disembark, set up the production, and then another half hour to "get the right angles" but this crew appeared to know their director well enough to understand what he wanted. Probably. I had no idea what the proper pace for such things was.
Whatever the case, by noon, the actor playing Ushimao (a very kind man, kept showing everyone pictures of his newborn grandchildren) was standing atop a ridge, laughing maniacally and doing his best Rita Repulsa impersonation (unfortunately inadequate) when -
"Noriyuki!" Gai shouted. "Get down!"
"Eh?" The old man squinted. "Wha-"
The jonin sprinted forward, and tackled the man, just as a spike of ice erupted from the ground - it would have split him in two.
Not twenty feet away from where he stood, a lavender-haired man in white-and-blue garb (including a cross between a forehead protector and a ushanka hat) threw off a dropcloth.
"Welcome to the Land of Snow," he sneered.
A giggling, young woman, pink-hair barely visible under her own forehead protector-cum-hat, wearing similar garb and with some sort of wrist-mounted launcher on her left hand, was now standing to our left. "I welcome you, Princess Koyuki. You did bring the Hex Crystal, didn't you?"
I heard the princess' breath catch in her throat, even as I instinctively moved to block her from their line of sight.
"Don't worry," I murmured, even as Subtitles designating each newcomer as targets One and Two respectively appeared in my frame of vision.
A third, big, burly, with a cyborg arm (what the fuck?!) tunneled in from the ground to our right - we were surrounded, our backs to the sea and our jonin exposed. "You've come this far, but no further," he rumbled. "Too bad for you…."
Gai immediately seized the actor in one hand and lept backwards, returning him (and more importantly, himself) to the relative safety of the film production and his team. "Everyone!" Gai called out. "Return to the ship!"
<Yuki-Nin> Gai noted. <Remain on your guard. Protect the princess. Standard team tactics. Fighting retreat.>
"No chatter?" The first nin shook his head slowly. "What a pity. The last Konoha ninja I fought had more personality to him… Fubuki, Mizore - take care of Princess Koyuki."
For all that we had trained in single combat while preparing for the chunin exams, Team Gai had practiced extensively working as part of a well-oiled machine. And for all that I decried the concept of being the "squishy backline caster" - that was my role in this formation: relative to my teammates, my focus had been on non-combat, non-taijutsu jutsu. So as part of a team, staying back and throwing out Flashbangs, Censor Bars, and the occasional senbon was perfectly reasonable - and if anyone was dumb enough to think that meant that they should close the distance with me?
Then I could have fun myself.
Gai moved to engage the first nin, their clear jonin equivalent; that left us with his two subordinates.
"Stay behind us," I warned the actors. "In fact, why are you still here! Back to the fucking ship! Move! Move!"
The fat one reached behind his back and pulled out something that looked very much like a snowboard - stepping on it and beginning his glide downhill, he was sure to quickly build up momentum.
All that kinetic energy would be useless without proper direction, though.
<Lee, take him down!>
Censor Bar no Jutsu!
-And yet, the familiar black bar didn't form - as Lee lept to kick what he believed would be a blinded and off-balance foe, the big man easily laughed and blocked the blow. My teammate's eyes widened; it was only my bushy-browed friend's skill in taijutsu that turned what could have been a disaster into a stalemate. He narrowly avoided a counter-grab, jabbed into the man's ribs with a quick one-two sequence of fists, and rolled away, all in the span of seconds.
But the big man was still coming.
"Hyoton: Swallow Snow Storm!"
A swarm of icy birds flew from the ground near Pinkie towards me.
Flashbang no Jutsu!
Once again, though - nothing. I could feel the chakra leaving me, but she wasn't affected in the slightest. Why?
Cursing, I dove for the ground, rolling so that I never stood still, heard the muffled thump of several of the birds hitting the ground around me - lucky me.
No - not lucky. Not all the birds had gotten got.
Homing jutsu - she was probably concentrating on it. Which meant that flashbang really should have been devastating.
I felt Neji at my back.
"Eight Trigrams Palms Revolving Heaven!" he cried out, and her technique was no longer an immediate problem.
"Oooh," she cooed. "Nice move."
<Checking the locals> I sent. <Genjutsu not working.>
<Understood.>
Neji advanced back into the fight as I retreated further - and wonder of wonders, it looked like we had competent individuals who listened to their security partners for once. Stage lights and coffee carafes and other miscellaneous things had been left behind (but not cameras or film, I noticed) in a showing that would make an environmentalist weep, but they people were mostly to the boats… with one notable exception.
"Princess?" I sighed. "Princess? Princess!"
She was unresponsive. No, looking at her it was worse that that. It was in her eyes, the way her pupils darted at around while her body simply stood there trembling.
"Oh fuck," I breathed. "I am sorry, I am so sorry, princess."
The woman was having a panic attack in the middle of a fight.
"Ice Prison no Jutsu!" I heard the faint cry in the distance.
<Chakra armor.> Gai reported. <Blocks all ninjutsu or genjutsu->
<Well shit,> I sent out. <Sorry, Lee. I guess you'd better surrender now->
Even at this distance, I heard his laugh, slightly broken, a little deranged. And then the crash of a punch enhanced by at least… a few Gates impacting metal.
"Mizore!" One of the Snow nin cried out.
Not my current concern.
"Hey," I said softly, reaching to touch Koyuki's arm. "Come on. We're going on a boat now, okay? We're going for a boat ride now. Follow me."
<Princess in critical condition. Need to withdraw from fight.>
<Enemy also in retreat. Holding ground.>
A narwhal made of ice was apparently covering their retreat, and the ice around us was literally cracking so… I believed Gai broadly but not literally.
"Boat?" she breathed, the words coming as if from a great distance. "Where… are… we… going?"
"It's a surprise," I told her, taking her by a gloved hand. "Don't worry. You'll be fine. You'll be safe."
"Sur…prise?" it would be a lie to call the expression she gave a smile. "Not… snow… I… don't… want… Land… of… Sn…." She collapsed like a puppet whose strings had been cut, but I was ready for that; I caught her before she hit the ground; one hand cradling her head, fingers spread over her soft, raven hair.
"I know," I told her unhearing form. "Believe me, I know."
I carried Koyuki to her cabin on the ship, set her still in costume atop her covers. At her bedside table was the Hex Crystal one of the Yuki-nin had spoken of - a dark gray shard on a leather thong, its facets sparkling in the harsh, cold sunlight.
Once it was verified that nobody was seriously injured, and everyone's wounds were treated, the director, the producer, Sandayu, and Team Gai held an emergency meeting.
"How much of this did you know?" The producer - whose name I still couldn't quite recall - demanded.
"All of it," Sandayu's posture remained perfectly upright. "There was no other way to get the princess to return to this country."
"Ah, excuse me," Lee interjected. "But what is actually going on here?"
"I should have known," Neji sighed. "No actress is worth an S-rank payout."
"I just assumed that the Number One actress was worth the extra service," Lee was perhaps just a tad indignant.
Gai looked at me meaningfully. As a chunin, it was my job to manage the genin; as jonin, it was his to manage the mission writ large. This, too, was training.
"No," I murmured, reluctantly. "That is not our mandate, gentlemen."
"Indeed not," Sandayu confirmed, to one shocked and one poker face. "I asked the Leaf for assistance in the liberation of my people from the tyrant who stole Koyuki-sama's birthright ten years ago, and your Hokage graciously accepted."
The producer blinked. "You're from the Land of Snow, Sandayu?"
"Oh, yes," the man said, and explained his history as a retainer in Lord Kazahana's court, intertwining it with that of his country. When the coup happened, he'd been overseas trying to secure financing; he'd thought the princess lost along with the castle when the coup had occurred, but when he had found her acting on stage as a teenager, his heart had soared.
"And now," he continued, tears streaming down his face. "We have a chance to strike back! To make right that grievous wrong!"
"I should have died then," came the cool voice of the princess herself. We all turned to face her: Kazahana Koyuki, her arms crossed, a pink parka draped over her nightclothes and open disdain upon face. "Why did you bring me back here just to die once more, Sandayu?"
"Y-you must not say such things!" he stammered. "Our greatest hope was that our princess was still alive!"
"Alive," she chuckled darkly. "Yes. I am alive."
"O-hime-sama," Sandayu stated. "I have served you, I have been your agent, I have bided my time for this day - where I could escort you back to your land and your people."
I let out a low, nervous little chuckle - Koyuki's eyes flicked towards me, a glittering of amusement echoing between us.
Sandayu rose to his feet to stand in front of his liege lady, and then got to his knees, his forehead touching the wooden planks of the ship. "O-hime-sama! I implore you. Please! Free your people! Overthrow Doto! Take your place as the rightful leader of this country! I will give my life to protect you! Please! Take up arms and stand with us!"
I felt incredibly uncomfortable watching this moment - this wasn't for us. And there was only one answer that the woman would give.
Koyuki merely stood over Sandayu, refusing to speak, letting the silence fill the space and distance between mistress and servant.
"...No," she stated flatly, in a tone I recognized all too well.
Some damn fool started laughing "Yeah!" they said. "Fuck the Land of Snow!"
Long repressed fury flashed in Koyuki's eyes. "My people are suffering under my uncle's rule!" she snapped.
"So what," I laughed. "You don't care. They're not your people any more… Fujikaze-san."
"...that's right," she scoffed, no longer leaning against the frame, her body posture ramrod straight. "I don't. They're not." She nodded. "I don't," she repeated, softly.
Whirling around, she slammed the door behind her, footsteps thudding like cannonballs as she retreated; Sandayu still kowtowing to the closed slab of wood.
"Nobunaga," Lee was dumbfounded. "How could you say something like that?"
Neji was nodding thoughtfully; Gai and the director had exchanged a meaningful look or two.
"We are able to dream, because we don't give up hope," Makino murmured, cackling. "We are able to dream, and that's why we have a future!"
"D-director?" Sandayu, still kneeling turned to face the older gentleman.
"It's from Princess Fuun's dramatic Act 2 speech!" he said. "It's one of the most dramatic moments in the movie we're filming!"
"You haven't allowed us a copy of the script," Neji pointed out.
"Oh," he shrugged. "Right. Well - in any case. The show must go on."
"Director!" the producer was completely flabbergasted. "You-you're not planning on-"
"Continuing to film," Makino insisted. "Yes! The footage from the fight between ninja! Priceless! The behind the scenes footage from this film alone? I might just get Best Documentary in addition to Best Picture this year!"
"Y-you've never gotten Best Picture!"
"After that stunt with the archers during the death scene, the union put the thumbscrews to me! But now… the action sequences for this film will be stupendous! The effects! True! This will change everything!"
Makino was wasted as a director. He should have become an evil genius.
"B-but-"
"Think about it," he cajoled. "How often can you make a movie with a real princess as the star - and advertise it that way?"
"The publicity…." The producer was now on board - ryou signs in his eyes. "This film is going to be a hit!"
"That Yuki-nin claimed he had made Kakashi retreat," Gai rumbled. "Defeating him would cement a victory over my eternal rival."
"We are on a sailing ship," I noted, more pragmatically. "They can cut off our retreat at any time."
Ice Release in arctic water. Yeah. The only way out was through.
There was just one final thing.
"If you are going to be filming us," I stated. "Then shouldn't we be classified as actors ourselves? Stuntpeople at the very least? Special effects?" I tapped on the table. "Let's talk residuals, old man."
"I-it's all covered in your ninja contract," Sandayu stammered, getting back on his feet.
I looked at Gai, who shrugged. "What's a 'residual?'"
The producer had never looked happier.
"...I'm going to go check on the princess," I sighed, and left to go do just that.
"Man," I heard Makino faintly through the door as I left, "You must have your hands full with that one. The kid's a shark! A shark!"
Koyuki remained sullen and uncooperative, but that was nothing new.
But I learned that the Land of Snow.
Had.
Snowmobiles.
No, that was a lie.
They had. Snowmobile. Trucks.
What the actual fuck.
"Oh, o-Kazahana-denka loved his little gizmos," had been the answer I'd gotten, and that was all that I could wrangle out of Sandayu. "I was actually overseas, trying to sell more debt for more of his strange ideas when he was betrayed."
I could have screamed; I didn't.
"...I'm going to check on the princess," is what I said instead.
Now that we were in confirmed hostile territory, she was no longer alone at any time. Out of respect for decency, we turned our backs for the sake of hygiene, but that was it. And if she didn't like it - or like us? So be it.
We climbed up a mountainous road, and approached the gaping maw of a large cave.
"Beyond this great cave," Sandayu stated, during a strategy meeting, "is the hideout of our resistance against Doto. We'll pass through after filming. Everyone is anxiously awaiting the princess's triumphant return.
"Years ago," he continued. "Before the coup, there was a railroad through here."
Lee frowned. "A railroad?"
A goddamn railroad?!
Yeah. Nobody else seemed to know what Sandayu was talking about, and Sandayu didn't even realize it himself.
"It's surely covered with icicles now," he continued. "But there are tracks beneath the ice. It was used to convey ore from the mines to the refineries, and ingots to our port city, you see."
A valuable commodity. Transportation and logistics. Infrastructure. Patterns falling into place.
"...So we're near the capital, then?" I asked.
"Oh, yes," he nodded. "It's just-"
"I need to do reconnaissance," I cut him off perhaps more brusquely than I ought to. "Confirm a theory. I don't like this. We're too close. Neji - keep your Byakugan up. I'll inform Lee that he'll be taking a double shift."
He wouldn't like it, but I had to know.
"Yes, Nobunaga!" I was right - he didn't like it. But Lee was a good friend, and a better soldier.
"...No."
Our principal, on the other hand, was neither.
"...Excuse me?"
"I said, 'no." She glared at me. "I'm coming with you."
"Princess," I began. "There is-"
"I know the area," she cut me off. "My scenes aren't being shot today. And if you don't take me with you, then I'll escape anyway. I can make your life difficult in a thousand ways, and I will. You want me as daimyo of the Land of Snow, right? Then don't make me an enemy."
Good to know that I wasn't already an enemy after the way I'd been treating her. Although, she was an actress - and they were splendid liars, actresses. It was like it was their job or something.
And she did make a few good arguments. That should be rewarded, even if they were blackmail.
"...Fine," I conceded. "Lee, you'll be with me-"
"No," she insisted. "Just you."
"Princess,I can't guaranteed your safety-"
"It's just reconnaissance," she threw my words back in my face. "And besides. I thought Konoha ninja were supposed to be the best."
"...You will do exactly what I say," I informed her. "No questions, no backtalk, no nothing, until we return to camp. I know several very painful jutsu that will not leave any marks or lasting harm and I will use them on you if you are obstreperous, because I would rather have you as an enemy than as a corpse. Do you understand?"
Her eyes met mine, cool blue against my own. "I understand, ninja."
"Uzumaki Nobunaga," I informed her. "Let's be off."
And so the two of us set out, traipsing through the woods; I'd borrowed a white dropcloth for her, as her usual pinks weren't very camouflage.
"What kind of trees are these, anyway," I muttered, as we continued along our way - I needed one with sturdy enough branches, and none of these seemed to have them.
"Pine," she answered. "This is a new growth forest used for timber. We cycle through them radially. We also have maple and spruce."
"Mmmm," I grunted, still trying to find a one I could get a good grip on and failing.
"You're an idiot, you know," she told me with practiced nonchalance. "When I get back, all I'm going to do is act on camera. I won't do anything else."
"Not my problem," I shrugged. "That's between you and the director."
"Oh? No lectures about duty?" She sniffed, either in distaste or just from the cold. "I thought you ninja got off on that sort of thing."
"Lady," I sighed. "You're not a ninja, and I'd be an idiot to expect you to act like one."
I flicked my gaze over to her. Her teeth were gritted; she was trying to get a dig in somewhere.
"...Well, good then," was her sullen little reply.
We continued our search in silence, for a short time.
"Why are you even doing this?" she asked, and she seemed at least a little curious.
"Because I'm lazy," I informed her.
"Eh?" I could hear her frown, the way the gears in her head tried to process that statement. "Come again?"
"Well, your dad got coup'd," I began, and her polite smile turned brittle. "There's a reason for that, besides your uncle being overly ambitious. Something about this land allowed him to make himself daimyo. And I want to know what that is."
"Why?"
"Because I don't want you to get murdered two, three… five years down the line," I said shortly. "Means that all the work I'm doing now will have been wasted, and I'll look bad. So I'm going to see what made his coup work, put a pin in that problem, and then once you're on the throne, get to sit back and drink in the praise. See? Laziness."
I grinned to myself; she made an unimpressed noise that I would not term a grunt - this was a lady, after all.
"...You don't even care if I become daimyo, do you," she accused me at last, and with that comment, I finally turned to face her.
That got a sardonic little chuckle out of me. "Please," I scoffed. "You want it."
"How."
"Because you'll live in a gilded palace, waited on hand and foot by a small army of attendants," I stated. "You'll want for nothing. All you have to do is say words written by other people, in a role you can interpret however you like. Steady work, for the rest of your life. An actresses' dream role: custom fit. Just. For. You."
Her breath quickened at my description.
"You have no idea what ruling is like." Her words were colder than the snow around us.
"No, that's exactly what ruling is like," I countered. "If you don't care. And you don't care."
She let out a sound that was half-laugh, half… I wasn't sure. Or maybe I was.
"Daimyo of a poor land." She slumped against a pine whose quills had been shattered somehow. "Queen of a broken people - I don't. I can't."
"This land wasn't poor," I murmured. "This land was wealthy beyond all imagining."
"My father beggared this nation with trinkets a-and frippery," she shot back, nearly choking out the words. "E-everyone knows that."
Yeah, but "everyone" wasn't in this fucking goddamn forest with us, now were they? What the fuck did "everyone" know about fucking anything?
"Your father was a genius" I hissed, and her eyes widened at my words; she nearly slipped off her tree. "who understood the keys to true development - to freedom."
There weren't any trees with convenient branches - but, though I was still sometimes too used to the conventions of my previous life, that wasn't an actual impediment. I walked straight up the trunk of the tallest tree in the arena, and looked out across the valley towards the capital.
Staring at one of the buildings in the distance, I fished out a pair of binoculars from my scroll, and peered at it closer. It was being used as a military barracks - but from the positioning of the doors, the windows, it hadn't originally been designed that way. I nodded to myself in satisfaction, and put the binoculars away.
I lept down, and with the assistance of chakra landed softly, only a puff of snow scattering to mark my descent.
"This country is 'poor,'" I continued, and it was a miracle that the snow did not melt in a five-foot radius around me, "because your idiot uncle has forced it into autarky for ten fucking years, and let its industry and comparative advantages wither on the vine in the name of bullshit Juche fucking shitty fuckity… fuck."
I was getting too worked up; I closed my eyes, took in a deep breath, softened my voice.
"Guns versus butter, and your father chose churns. Tell me about the university."
"The what?" she pretended to be nonchalant, but I knew better.
"He must have told you about it, right?" I squinted at her. "A… school, a great school. Or an institute. Or a library. A place, a building to attract scholars from-"
"-all around the world," she finished, blinking at me like she'd never seen me before. "How did you-"
"He understood the resource curse," I breathed.
Oh, but this had been a beautiful country before it had gotten covered in utter and complete bullshit.
"...You're crying," she said, staring. "I thought ninja weren't allowed to cry."
It was snowing, just a little - faint flurries and snowflakes kissing my hair and shoulders and face. I touched the corner of my eye, and it was wet.
"...Yeah," I sighed. "Yeah, I guess I am."
"Well what do you know, anyway," she puffed herself back up. "Y-you never even met him!"
"No, but I can see his vision," I corrected her. "And-"
"You see someone's vision, you see half of who they are," she finished for me.
Now it was my turn to squint at her. "Only half?"
She raised a sardonic eyebrow. "The other half," she explained patiently, "is the people that they surround themselves with."
"Then why are you so alone, princess?"
Her mouth opened, and no words came out. Her gaze turned to the ground, one arm clutching at the other.
"...I'm sorry," I said at last. "That was-"
In the distance, there was a sound that I had heard in this lifetime. A steady puffing, chuffing sound. A rhythmic clacking of wheels and pistons and locomotion. And then… a steam whistle.
The princess and I looked dead on at each other.
"Train," we whispered.
"Back to the camp."
There must be something wrong with me, to look upon the aftermath of a massacre and have only two words run through my mind.
Strategic assets.
The Resistance had rammed logs into the side of the train and onto the tracks - tried to charge into the belly of the beast. Brave men, patriots one and all.
They had died wholesale.
Lee and Neji filled me in on the details - the train was armed with some manner of contraption - a crank of a lever, and hundreds of kunai had flown at great speed. With Eight Trigrams Palms Revolving Heaven, Neji had managed to hold back one barrage - for one section of the charge. But that had still broken the advance.
Gai and Lee had moved offensively - Gate-enhanced punches had crippled the kunai launches, taken out train cars. But the locomotive itself had escaped.
"Sandayu!" Koyuki rushed forward heedless of my warnings, the white dropcloth falling to the ground, searching among the dead and dying for her retainer and agent. "Sandayu!"
"Here! Princess! Here!"
The man was alive, his battered old armor incongruous with his pince-nez. The man was bleeding from multiple cuts - shrapnel and ricochets; one of his lenses was shattered; his face was pale and he looked as if he'd aged three decades in the hours since we'd left. But he was alive, and none of his injuries were serious.
The same could not be said of his comrades, of what hade been hundreds who had apparently sworn and given their lives in the hopes of overthrowing Doto.
"Sandayu!" she wept tearlessly. "You're alive!"
Her hand cracked across his face.
"You idiot!" she cried, the carnage and cawing of crows her soundtrack. "This! Is what happens after defying Doto! All your idealism! All your promises of revolution and restoration! This is a land without spring! Without hope! And you will die with these men if you stay here!"
Her eyes scrunched together, as she choked back a sob.
"Let's go home." She sounded every one of her eighteen years.
"Princess," I warned, catching up to her. "We still have-"
"No!" she shot back. "We don't! You can just-"
It all happened so quickly.
A noise - a premonition? Something caused me to grab her by the wrist, seconds before she was yanked into the air. A grappling hook - no, a prosthetic arm, still gleaming had snagged her by the waist, and I was too stubborn to let go, as a goddamn airship rose into the air.
And us with it.
Into the belly of the beast we went.
outwrangle
Postmaster General
- Location
- Iowa
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Orochimaru: "And that's why I formed my own village and planned to absorb all the other minor villages into my sphere of influence"
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Well it's always a pleasure to see this updated. Some definite positives include Nobunaga's dry assessment of things are and how the Snow mission is pushing a lot of buttons for him ranging from:
Got to be honest I don't like criticising this story because overall I really love it but I have to admit the story scene per scene following the movie plot despite an entirely different Ninja team taking the mission and Nobunaga thinking in a very different ways from Naruto was the weakest part of the chapter-something of a let down for me.
I would have loved to see the chapter explore how things can diverge like say have Lee or Gai take down and capture one of the attacking Snow Ninja setting the stage from some interrogation and information gathering, have Nobunaga-Koyuki being away scouting means that Koyuki doesn't get grabbed by surprise airship setting the stage for a Nobunaga planned uprising effort or even something basic yet game changing like The Leaf ninja learn the crystal Koyuki is carrying is important to the enemy and give it to some of Gai's summons for safe keeping etc.
I get that divergences take time to build up and Nobunaga is kind of unable to do much to Snow Ninja due to their armour cancelling genjutsu but … ah well I have said my piece. Fingers crossed Nobunaga subverts things next chapter via not getting captured or actually managing to assassinate the big bad via sneaky non dramatic fight methods.
Still I found the writing to be high quality as ever and I am really curious as to how the actually being incorporated into the setting Land of Snow will feature in the overall story. Thanks for your continued effort @industrious @FurikoMaru .
- Previously discussed discomfort with taking Koyuki's agency away right after the Senju issues raises its head,
- His primary skill set being hard negated by Snow Ninja Chakra armour.
- Seeing how an attempt to modernise - elevate a nations infrastructure just imploded out of short sighted greed - traditional mindset - pumping everything into weapons and levelled up ninja gear.
Got to be honest I don't like criticising this story because overall I really love it but I have to admit the story scene per scene following the movie plot despite an entirely different Ninja team taking the mission and Nobunaga thinking in a very different ways from Naruto was the weakest part of the chapter-something of a let down for me.
I would have loved to see the chapter explore how things can diverge like say have Lee or Gai take down and capture one of the attacking Snow Ninja setting the stage from some interrogation and information gathering, have Nobunaga-Koyuki being away scouting means that Koyuki doesn't get grabbed by surprise airship setting the stage for a Nobunaga planned uprising effort or even something basic yet game changing like The Leaf ninja learn the crystal Koyuki is carrying is important to the enemy and give it to some of Gai's summons for safe keeping etc.
I get that divergences take time to build up and Nobunaga is kind of unable to do much to Snow Ninja due to their armour cancelling genjutsu but … ah well I have said my piece. Fingers crossed Nobunaga subverts things next chapter via not getting captured or actually managing to assassinate the big bad via sneaky non dramatic fight methods.
Still I found the writing to be high quality as ever and I am really curious as to how the actually being incorporated into the setting Land of Snow will feature in the overall story. Thanks for your continued effort @industrious @FurikoMaru .
- Location
- Oblivion
Give it a bit, after all things are just warming up.
And for all we know, this could end with Nobunaga marrying Koyuki.
After all, he's a couple years older then Naruto and that would be a great way to solidify the Land of Snow's alliance with the Leaf.
Rancorious
Continue? Yes or No.
Nobunaga: "You maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!"
- Location
- Oblivion
Actually... Thinking about it...
This could be his out.
Asuma said he basically had the choice of Ninja, Anbu, or the 12 Guardians. But if he could get in good enough with Koyuki he could potentially open up a fourth option. Because the Leaf would probably jump at the chance to trade a newly promoted Chunin for a continual supply of Chakra metal. And Tsunade is likely feeling guilty enough that if Nobunaga pushed for it she would be willing to approve it.
This could be his out.
Asuma said he basically had the choice of Ninja, Anbu, or the 12 Guardians. But if he could get in good enough with Koyuki he could potentially open up a fourth option. Because the Leaf would probably jump at the chance to trade a newly promoted Chunin for a continual supply of Chakra metal. And Tsunade is likely feeling guilty enough that if Nobunaga pushed for it she would be willing to approve it.
Krazyfan1
Worrying for the future.
- Location
- Australia
so from what i gather, this means that Homing jutsus, or at least Some of them, require maintenance?
i.e Ninja 1 shoots out a homing fireball that automatically shoots towards an enemy, then focuses on something else.
while Ninja 1 is distracted, the enemy makes a Mud wall between them and the fireball, which is blocked.
Ninja 2 shoots a homing fireball that automatically shoots towards an enemy, but pays attention to it, the enemy makes a mud wall, But this time Ninja 2 makes the fireball curve around the wall to hit the target anyway.
different jutsus could have workarounds to this issue, but could also have their own downsides.
making more fireballs to blast through the wall could work, but that would require more chakra, and hoping that the remaining fireballs are enough.
adding conditions to the jutsu, i.e "if enemy makes Wall, go around" could work, but trying to think of every possibility would take time, and you probably missed some.
making the jutsu smarter could work, but that would require studying how to do that, probably more handsigns, and if they make it Too smart, it might decide to do something else instead.
nobody wants their fireball to decide to give peace a go and fly Away from the target...probably a bit embarrassing...
Hey he says they're crazy but that's basically what happened in Konoha five minutes ago. In their time of greatest need their princess returns to them.
It's kind of sad that we never got serious philosophical opposition to the village system like that in canon Naruto. There's a lot of excellent reasons but everyone who rebels seems to turn out worse than the mercenary villages they came from.
I wonder if that was Danzo's real accomplishment, he drove everyone who revolted so insane they could no longer provide a good alternative.
Well I thought there was some interesting details throughout to talk about so here is my take on that sort of pick and discuss.
It's kind of fascinating to look what this section says about both sides of things. Sandayu clearly believes in the cause but he's .... deluded is too harsh a description but perhaps out of step with the reality as to what an uprising against a dictator backed by a dedicated Ninja force would mean, that's not even considering the advanced tech weapons that can just mow down hordes of people.
Koyuki's kin slaying brute of an uncle is apparently backed by the Village Hidden in the Snow (or whatever organized Ninja presence exists in the country) and ninja vs not chakra wielding attackers tends to go very much in the favor of the Ninja. Add in kunai firing machine gun analogues and yeah this was never going to be clear cut uprising he hoped for.
But on the other side of things Nobunaga's default reaction to a Monarchist viewpoint is confusion and belief that such people are crazy - the minority. Nobunaga's being raised in Konoha and influenced by his life has disconnected him from the reality of politics in the Naruto verse, Daimyo Royalty are the norm here. Literally the only observed forms of large scale government that exist are Royalty (Daimyo) and Military Dictator's (Kage). Democracy is not a big thing in this setting.
I do love how they have ended up playing off each other.
Okay Lee breaking out in deranged laughter at the realization of the Chakra armour's blind spot and proceeding to absolutely wreck one of the Snow Ninja is great. I can't help but imagine Gaara being a big fan of the movie that lets his eternal rival show off, and vibing with him about terrifying ones enemies.
Interesting little subversion of things, the Snow Ninja retreated in the face of Lee and Gai being hard counters to them, even as the Konoha nin withdrew because of the civilians rather than canon's setup where the Konoha ninja were the ones solely fleeing the encounter. Both sides withdrew in mutual we don't want this fight here.
Koyuki went into this looking for a fight and is frustrated Nobunaga isn't playing ball.
I really do love how Nobunaga's handling of her is so inherently different from Naruto's approach in the same situation.
Naruto did his usual scrappy determined routine and tried to push/berate her into believing in herself - making the choice to be brave etc. Nobunaga knows Koyuki doesn't have a choice and that she will be placed on the throne regardless of her wishes so he employs psychological tactics equating being a negligent ruler with the aspects of acting that Koyuki hates so she's inclined to not just lounge around and do nothing with the power.
It really shows how differently Naruto and Nobunaga would perceive this setup.
It's a really interesting angle that Nobunaga sees and sincerely admires what Koyuki's father was aiming for with the technological infrastructure renovation efforts and is enraged - saddened both that the efforts were destroyed and that the nebulous 'everyone' want to lump things getting so bad as the fault of the person who was dragging the country out of the dark ages instead of the dictatorship that sealed the country off in a reactionist response.
Nobunaga viscerally getting Koyuki's father is a unique beat and I love the twist of dialogue that this section is. It's fascinating that Koyuki comes out of her shell somewhat and even relays what I read as a quote from her father only for Nobunaga to be be cuttingly real-painfully insightful without meaning to.
Really enjoying how they are bouncing off each other. Definitely a highlight of the arc.
Honestly I like this handling of the resistance massacre. It's was pretty visceral shocking in the movie with the only downside being that Doto was something of a moustache twirling one note bad guy. Having it play out off screen as it were with the heroes coming back and seeing the devastation sells the horror in a clinical way.
Also Nobunaga being quietly ruthless and able to slot people into assets in a pieces on a board sense is a good way to show that he has soaked up some of the pretty screwed up ninja ideology despite himself.
I mean when the Dictatorship your opposing has someone who can fight Kakashi and make him retreat on the payroll ordinary people were always going to get mowed down on mass but yeah this is some very World War 1 soliders charging machine gun nests energy of new technology just negating the existing paradigm of tactics and a whole lot of people dying before they learn to adapt.
Well there's a fun little divergence. Sandayū surviving the slaughter due to Team Gai being better equipped to counterattack- defend the forces getting barraged. Wonder what ripples will spring from that.
I for one really enjoyed the world building and character interactions you worked into this @industrious @FurikoMaru . As ever curious as to how this will progress and evolve.
It's kind of fascinating to look what this section says about both sides of things. Sandayu clearly believes in the cause but he's .... deluded is too harsh a description but perhaps out of step with the reality as to what an uprising against a dictator backed by a dedicated Ninja force would mean, that's not even considering the advanced tech weapons that can just mow down hordes of people.
Koyuki's kin slaying brute of an uncle is apparently backed by the Village Hidden in the Snow (or whatever organized Ninja presence exists in the country) and ninja vs not chakra wielding attackers tends to go very much in the favor of the Ninja. Add in kunai firing machine gun analogues and yeah this was never going to be clear cut uprising he hoped for.
But on the other side of things Nobunaga's default reaction to a Monarchist viewpoint is confusion and belief that such people are crazy - the minority. Nobunaga's being raised in Konoha and influenced by his life has disconnected him from the reality of politics in the Naruto verse, Daimyo Royalty are the norm here. Literally the only observed forms of large scale government that exist are Royalty (Daimyo) and Military Dictator's (Kage). Democracy is not a big thing in this setting.
I do love how they have ended up playing off each other.
Okay Lee breaking out in deranged laughter at the realization of the Chakra armour's blind spot and proceeding to absolutely wreck one of the Snow Ninja is great. I can't help but imagine Gaara being a big fan of the movie that lets his eternal rival show off, and vibing with him about terrifying ones enemies.
Interesting little subversion of things, the Snow Ninja retreated in the face of Lee and Gai being hard counters to them, even as the Konoha nin withdrew because of the civilians rather than canon's setup where the Konoha ninja were the ones solely fleeing the encounter. Both sides withdrew in mutual we don't want this fight here.
Koyuki went into this looking for a fight and is frustrated Nobunaga isn't playing ball.
I really do love how Nobunaga's handling of her is so inherently different from Naruto's approach in the same situation.
Naruto did his usual scrappy determined routine and tried to push/berate her into believing in herself - making the choice to be brave etc. Nobunaga knows Koyuki doesn't have a choice and that she will be placed on the throne regardless of her wishes so he employs psychological tactics equating being a negligent ruler with the aspects of acting that Koyuki hates so she's inclined to not just lounge around and do nothing with the power.
It really shows how differently Naruto and Nobunaga would perceive this setup.
It's a really interesting angle that Nobunaga sees and sincerely admires what Koyuki's father was aiming for with the technological infrastructure renovation efforts and is enraged - saddened both that the efforts were destroyed and that the nebulous 'everyone' want to lump things getting so bad as the fault of the person who was dragging the country out of the dark ages instead of the dictatorship that sealed the country off in a reactionist response.
Nobunaga viscerally getting Koyuki's father is a unique beat and I love the twist of dialogue that this section is. It's fascinating that Koyuki comes out of her shell somewhat and even relays what I read as a quote from her father only for Nobunaga to be be cuttingly real-painfully insightful without meaning to.
Really enjoying how they are bouncing off each other. Definitely a highlight of the arc.
Honestly I like this handling of the resistance massacre. It's was pretty visceral shocking in the movie with the only downside being that Doto was something of a moustache twirling one note bad guy. Having it play out off screen as it were with the heroes coming back and seeing the devastation sells the horror in a clinical way.
Also Nobunaga being quietly ruthless and able to slot people into assets in a pieces on a board sense is a good way to show that he has soaked up some of the pretty screwed up ninja ideology despite himself.
I mean when the Dictatorship your opposing has someone who can fight Kakashi and make him retreat on the payroll ordinary people were always going to get mowed down on mass but yeah this is some very World War 1 soliders charging machine gun nests energy of new technology just negating the existing paradigm of tactics and a whole lot of people dying before they learn to adapt.
Well there's a fun little divergence. Sandayū surviving the slaughter due to Team Gai being better equipped to counterattack- defend the forces getting barraged. Wonder what ripples will spring from that.
I for one really enjoyed the world building and character interactions you worked into this @industrious @FurikoMaru . As ever curious as to how this will progress and evolve.
22. St. Elmo's Fire
Chapter Twenty-Two - St. Elmo's Fire
The only thing I could do as we ascended was unclip my pouch, letting it fall to the ground even as jagged stalks and spikes of ice exploded all around us, keeping my teammates from reaching us in time. Gai probably could have done it - but at the cost of leaving Neji and Lee behind?
No, he couldn't have.
Koyuki might have been screaming, but the wind whistling in my ears drowned out any other sounds. I had to think quickly - there wasn't much time before we reached the airship.
Assets - one princess, slightly used, and everything that wasn't in my pouch or storage scroll. That did include a knife, so I could very easily stab the ninja who was reeling us in -
- but that would be counterproductive. Lethality was a tool like any other. With the element of surprise? Sure, I could kill that man. But - I'd still be on an airship with no easy way down.
No, my fate had been sealed the moment I'd decided to hold on rather than letting go. Dammit.
Of course, I couldn't let them know that.
And I had my own pride, dammit.
"Gotcha!" the cyborg ogre that Doto Kazahana had in his employ grunted as he grabbed Koyuki by the scruff of her neck - right before I got him with a rabbit punch right in the schnozz, pushing him away from the railing and what would be a very messy way to die for all of us.
"Ah!" he skidded across the metal grating.
"Koyuki!" I shouted, "Get inside! Quickly!"
We rushed past him, and I quickly locked the submarine-style door behind us, jamming the wheel with my dagger.
The interior of the ship was, of course, lousy with enemy ninja. But that was fine, because none of them seemed to be wearing the Taiji-chakra armor of the nin we'd fought.
Which meant it was open season.
First Gate: Gate of Opening - Release!
Once more the veil lifted from my eyes, mind and body unifying to become one. I became aware of each and every presence in my field of vision.
Flashbang no Jutsu!
The veiled Snow-nin cried out in pain, and I went on the offense. Fists flashed; kicks arced - I let myself go, and simply be in the fight.
I took them as a scythe, and they fell before me.
Up close? My skill at taijutsu far exceeded theirs.
Further away? I was in a target-rich environment; they could not use area attacks for fear of hitting their comrades, and those they dared deploy I could easily avoid. The Gate of Opening gave me near-prescience, such was its boost to my processing speed. Was this why the Uchiha were so feared? Not all of the clan could have been as powerful as the old monsters but for even their weakest to be at this level…
"Enough!" A deep bass growled.
The Snow-nin stopped.
A fat-faced, fat-chinned man whose richly embroidered robes nonetheless hid a warrior's build and armor stood before me, a kunai held to Koyuki's carotid artery.
"Surrender," he ordered me.
"I'm sorry," the princess whispered, before she was cut off by a painful twist of her wrist.
"You surrender to me?" I laughed. "I accept."
"Bravado," Doto - for who else could it be? - scoffed. "Will not help you here, boy."
"Yeah, well-" I began, only for something very heavy to hit me, right in the small of my back. I slumped back down, the First Gate closing off.
"No!"
"-thank you, Mizore," Doto rumbled, as the cyborg drifted into my line of sight. Squinting, I noticed a detail about the giant.
"Hey," I wheezed. "Is that a new arm? Man, my teammate must have-"
He kicked me, right in the ribs. Then, he drew back to do it again.
"Now now, Mizore," Doto held up a hand. "Plenty of time for that later. There are ladies present. Koyuki - the years have only made you grow more beautiful."
Oh that was so wrong on so many levels. I opened my mouth to say something - spat out a little blood instead.
Probably for the best, to be honest; didn't have anything worth interrupting a monologue for, what with abandoning my pouch prior to boarding. For once, not the airline's fault. Only took a universe hop to do it.
"-Hex Crystal?"
Koyuki tried to be very very still, but the poor thing was trembling.
"Y-yes."
"Hand it over."
She tried; she really did. A gloved hand twitched uselessly at her side; more than anything, it looked like the true ruler of the Land of Snow was having a seizure. It was a miracle that she didn't impale herself on her uncle's blade.
"...I can't," she whispered. "...Around my nec-"
Brusquely, he reached below her pink jacket and tore the grey shard free; his brutish features split into a smile as he beheld what he had been seeking.
"Ah," he sighed. "The key to the secret treasure of this land."
"S-ssecret… treasure?" Koyuki asked, shivering, though not from the cold. I admired that about her - she was trying to exert some measure of control over the situation, trying to figure something out.
"When I took control of this land, the Kazahana had nothing." Doto stepped away from his niece, heavy boots thudding against the deck. Without his frame to threaten her, she collapsed; the two of us were now both on the floor, surrounded by hostile nin. "All the wealth that had been flowing in to this land… he could not have spent it all on his little toys. Sosetsu must have hidden his riches somewhere. And I found it - a vault in the Rainbow Glacier; a keyhole in the shape of the Hex Crystal-"
I could no longer hold it in.
Laughter. Mad, maniacal laughter at the expense of this idiot who had squandered the wealth of a rising power.
…And there was that kick that he'd put off.
"The arrogance of the Leaf never ceases to amaze," Doto rumbled. "Let's test that device on him. Maybe that will keep him civil?"
Device? What device?
One of the Snow-nin we'd fought - the girl - knelt over me, a sadistic smile on her face. Pain suddenly erupted right where my ribcage ended.
"Say good-bye to your chakra~" she half-sang, mockingly, but I had the last laugh.
The device shocked me the moment it made skin contact. Harsh electricity surged through my body, and the only reason why I didn't erupt into discordant screams was because that same bitter voltage locked my jaw into place. Simultaneously, though, the Hex Crystal in Doto's hand popped away with a puff of smoke, leaving behind a piece of costume jewelry from Makino's production.
"What?!" he roared. "Where is it?! Where is the crystal!"
"Heh," I wheezed. "Heh heh heh heh heh-" I broke out into a fit of coughing, which abruptly ended when Mizore smashed open the nearest window on the airship, and made as if to throw me out it. Or just dangle me. He had options. Maybe not the brainpower to realize it, though.
"Where is it," he grunted.
"At this point?" I tried to shrug, which was surprisingly difficult when you were being dragged like a sack of potatoes. "Probably the Hokage's desk. First class postage is a beautiful thing - sent it off right before the ship weighed anchor-"
The mook threw me to the ground, yelling in frustration. Doto made a thoughtful sound.
"Clever boy," he mused. "But little matter. After all, Senju Nobunaga-"
Those words were almost more painful than all the kicks and electricity put together.
"The Hokage's son will make a fine hostage for its safe return."
Somewhere, a broken little laugh was made.
"The Hokage doesn't have a son."
"Oh," Doto smiled. "I highly doubt that."
The prison cell they threw me into was carved into hollowed rock - from the looks of things, it had probably been a mine, once. The chained up skeletons of previous inhabitants occupied numerous cells around me, their ghastly grinning visages seeming to make mockery of the mere notion of escape.
It was cold; there was no heating or the like, and the only light came from dim blue bulbs set into sconces set at regular intervals between cells. We seemed to be underground. They had chained my manacled hands above my head - my feet were in irons and chained to the ground as well, and I was suspended maybe a foot off the ground. Stuck in my gut was the chakra suppressor, its central probe deeply unsettling and its ancillary wires pinpricks of discomfort as they rubbed and chafed against my skin and vest and undershirt. Whenever I instinctively tried to draw on my chakra, the device would crackle with electricity; the shocks were painful enough to break my concentration and violently dissuade me from doing so.
Honestly, I was more than a little insulted by this treatment. Did they think I was merely some sort of political dissident or protestor? I was a goddamn ninja from fucking Konohagakure - were there no standards?
Eh. Their loss, really.
Fucking. Amateurs.
For all the Land of Snow's technological prowess, they hadn't seemed to outfit these cells with CCTV. Even better - as I waited patiently for the first appearance of a guard (the better to understand what sort of rotation I'd be working with), two arrived, escorting none other than Koyuki herself to the cell right across from me.
They didn't bother to shackle her - just lock her behind the bars, place a seal on the keyhole, and walk away.
…Yeah.
Amateurs.
The only reason I didn't burst out laughing was because the chakra suppressor was an awkward weight right in my center of mass and it would have drawn unnecessary attention. I waited for the guard's footsteps to fade away - and then planned to wait several more minutes so that they'd grow bored if they were planning to listen in when the princess preempted me.
"So you're a prince, too."
"Fuck you," I spat. "Take those words back right fucking now."
The light was dim but it still glittered across her level gaze.
"Senju," she replied. "I read that Senju Tsunade is the new leader of the ninja in the Land of Fire. Senju Hashirama was the first ninja leader-"
"-the word is 'Hokage'-" I grunted.
"-Hokage," she conceded, though something in her tone indicated that she knew the term already. "And you are her son. Senju Nobunaga."
"Uzumaki. Uzumaki! Nobunaga!"
She let out a short, almost unlady-like bark of laughter. "What's the difference? Your mother is the Hokage-"
"-I am an orphan!" The words erupted from my mouth. "My mother gave me up when I was a baby! But now that she's Hokage, sure! We're all just part of one big happy family! Man up, Nobunaga, and grin and bear it! You're part of a legacy now! Never mind what you've done yourself, eh?"
Koyuki was unreadable. "And to think you scolded me for attempting to build my own life away from my family."
"We aren't alike, Koyuki," I spat. "You had a family - you had something, and it was taken from you. Something precious and beautiful and wonderful and-and then you didn't. I was raised in the gutter. I became a ninja because I had talent and the orphan's stipend ends when you hit sixteen, and I had a little brother who was going to get himself killed if I didn't do something about it. A prince, princess? I'm no prince."
And then, almost to myself: "I don't deserve the Senju name."
Koyuki remained where she was, slumped against the near wall of her cell. "Well, it doesn't matter much where we are now, does it?" Her words were quiet, but I could still hear them. "Prince, princess, ninja? We're both trapped here."
That, at least, got me chuckling.
"What?" The actress' petulance was adorable - it was almost painful to laugh. "What?"
"'M sorry," I wheezed. "'S'painful to laugh oh it hurts oooh. But your uncle? Way too much time putting down peasants, not enough time dealing with actual professionals. And if our little heart-to-heart didn't get the guards running…."
Twisting my wrists together, I reached into the inside of my sleeve and retrieved one of the lockpicks that was secreted there and produced it with a flourish. They really should have stripped me down, put me in some sort of prisoner's garb. Pulling myself up on the manacles, the better to see what I was doing, I jiggled the lock - and was disgusted by how easy it was to open them. Honestly, the rust on the mechanism was almost more of a problem than their complexity.
The shackles clicked open - my knees bent in anticipation, and I absorbed the shock of the blow easily. With my hands free, undoing the shackles on my feet was child's play and in less than two minutes, my freedom had increased by several orders of magnitude.
"Cell time," I muttered. "Seal on the door…."
I flicked the lockpick at space between the bars - an electric arc sizzled between them, illuminating the jagged piece of metal. Oh, fun.
"I would have gone for a more conceptual barrier, personally," I continued, aware that the princess' attention remained firmly on me. "But again - amateur hour. The barrier is tied to the paper seal on the keyhole. Therefore…"
Producing a straight pin, I simply rammed it through the lock, puncturing the seal entirely, and rendering the thing useless. And once it'd been neutralized, picking the actual cell door was likewise simplicity in and of itself.
"And voila," I finished, pushing the door open carefully, because the hinges were rusty, and I didn't want to make too much unnecessary noise. "Now, do you want me to walk through yours or should I just do it for you?"
Koyuki let out a sound that was half-laugh, half-sob.
"Even if we escape," she choked out. "What does it matter? We'll be alone. My father died, and I escaped, and I ran, and I ran. I lied. I've lied for so long, to so many people - even to myself. But no matter how far I've run, how many lies I've told… I ended up back here. I'm tired, Nobunaga. So… tired."
"Here's the truth," I informed her. "There's a tracking seal in the liner of my, ah, headband; the others know where we are, and they're probably on their way even now. Your uncle is going down. Tonight. That's happening. You're tired, but the nightmare is almost over.
"It might be safer if you stay in that cell," I continued. "I wouldn't blame you in the slightest. But I've had to bodyguard you all through production, Koyuki; you're just enough of a spiteful bitch-"
She glared at me, and I reveled in it.
"-that you want to see him finally brought down," I finished. "Because any other way, without it being just as visceral as the day he took everything from you… I don't think you won't ever really leave this place."
"...You just love the sound of your own voice, don't you?" she noted, a faint smile playing across her lips. "Open the door, please."
Even without access to my chakra, I could take out a pair of Snow-nin guards, especially given that they were distracted by the explosions we'd all felt on the other side of the building we were in. It was admittedly more difficult than I would have liked, especially because I had to refrain from even infusing my chakra for fear of getting jolted, but what was the point of all that intensive conditioning and training if not for a situation such as this? Even injured as I was, I was a member of Team Gai.
Even still, an "Oh fuck," ripped out of me when Koyuki and I got off the prison's elevator and another pair of guards were waiting for us. Could I do it? Probably. Was it going to suck? Definitely. Even still, needs must-
"Super Senbon!"
An ulna-sized rod smacked into the temple of one guard, and ricocheted into the top of the other's head, knocking both of them out.
"Nobunaga!" Lee, Gai and Neji waved at us.
"What took you so long?" I grinned. "Another ten minutes, and we'd have taken care of Doto without you?"
"Ha!" my jonin laughed, throwing me my supply pouch. Excellent. I had so much shit stored in there, mostly in the scroll, but there was also a spare knife, and senbon. "Indomitable as ever, chunin!"
"What happened to 'if captured, stay in one place, it'll be easier for rescue operations,' Nobunaga?" Neji snarked at me.
"I got bored." My reply was accompanied by an idle wave of the hand, along with a twist to indicate Koyuki. "The hospitality here? Not great. I need to speak to the manager… immediately."
The princess giggled despite herself, as she was greeted in turn.
Gai's eyes narrowed, though, when his attention returned to me . "Nobunaga," he stated. "You are injured."
"Yeah," I grunted. "Jus- just a bit."
"And what is that." Neji added, flatly.
"Chakra suppressor. If you would-" I had to twist out of the way before my teammate clawed it off of me. "Fuck! Gently, Neji, gently! There are wires in my skin, and it shocks me if I try to use chakra! Also, I'd like to keep it intact if possible."
"Why?!"
"You are his teammates," Koyuki remarked, leaning against the railing as she caught her breath. "I believe you can figure it out."
"I like her!" Lee flashed the princess a thumbs-up. "I guess you and Nobunaga had a good talk while you were captured?"
"Can we please just focus on the mission?" I interjected smoothly. "Because-ow!"
Using one of my knives, Gai had sliced through the wires with the utmost precision; with his free hand, he'd twisted the main body of the chakra suppressor out.
It hurt.
Oh god, it hurt so good.
Chakra, even when not being actively infused, made you stronger, faster, tougher, and more relevantly - promoted healing. Not to the level of Wolverine or anything, but it was still a noticeable difference to someone with a second life's worth of memories.
"What's the plan?" I groaned, reaching out as Gai handed me the suppressor, and tucking it into the scroll.
"Doto should still be here," Gai stated. "We hit the, ah, carriage house-"
"-garage-"
"Where his flying machine was stabled, which will make any retreat difficult. The local resistance provided us with a map of this place - a man such as Doto?" Gai smirked. "He can only be in one place."
Koyuki nodded. "Yes. The throne room." The Land of Snow's rightful heir set off before we could respond. "This way."
The room in question was built for the power play - bare, big, industrial, and ostentatious, with a dark seal shaped like bat wings staining the metal tiles of the floor. A steep staircase ramped up to the obscene dais where the chair itself stood - the only piece of furniture, and the only thing which did not match the decor. It looked like a relic from a different Land of Snow, dark-stained wood, and maroon velvet.
My jonin and Koyuki were right - Doto was waiting for us.
Below him were the three ninja we'd fought on the iceberg, and that I'd encountered on the airship.
"So you have come to die," the dictator rumbled. "You slink into my land like thieves in the night; retreat in the face of my jonin; allow your chunin to be captured; and you think you have a chance against us?"
I'd known he was economically illiterate from his little rant on the airship, but I hadn't realized just how badly he'd succumbed to dictator disease - how poorly he'd gotten himself isolated from the flow of information. Chakra armor aside - we hadn't lost the encounter on the iceberg; our objective had been to protect and defend the film crew, not to eliminate enemy ninja. And while I could have handled the airship better - much better, I'd be running myself and Team Gai on bodyguard drills when we got back - once again, we'd traded tactical losses for operational and strategic advances.
Because however imposing this room was or intimidating his voice? The facts were clear - here we, a group of enemy ninja, were, in the heart of his territory.
Face to face with the target.
I drew my knife.
"Koyuki," I murmured, keeping my attention on the enemy. "Stay behind us; when the fighting starts, get out of the room, close the door behind you."
"Of course." Her breath ruffled against my hair, and tickled my ear.
The Snow-nin were still talking; if it were up to me, I would have pressed the attack already. But I was the chunin; Gai was the jonin.
"-famed Copy Ninja was forced to retreat by my prowess," the three-man squad's apparent leader was drawling. "You stand no chance, jumpsuit."
Gai merely let the echoes of his expression touch the corners of his eyes. "So you've mentioned. Perhaps-" His hands clapped together.
As did Lee's.
"-I should take you seriously. Eight Inner Gates: Sixth Gate - Gate of Joy - Open!"
"Eight Inner Gates: Fourth Gate - Gate of Pain - Open!"
The lavender-haired nin blinked. "Gate of wha-"
Three members of Team Gai fell upon the foe.
"Leaf Rock-Destroying Rise!"
"Leaf Hurricane!"
"Eight Trigrams: Thirty-Two Palms!"
Three Snow-nin crashed to the floor, broken and bloodied.
A green blur - Konoha's Noble Green Beast - flew up to meet a thunderstruck Doto.
"You hurt my student."
The sheer weight of the proclamation from Konoha's foremost expert in taijutsu would have had the man fall to his knees. But Guy would not allow him to do so.
"Dynamic… Action!"
The barrage that followed would have been a full minute of overcrank in the hands of a Snyder or a Bay; in reality, it lasted less than two seconds.
I sheathed my knife, sighing almost in disgust. "You know, I didn't get to do anything," I called out. "I'm the one who got captured here, you could have left me something. And just, I don't know, kicking them like this, feels kinda pathetic! I am just as val-"
Koyuki's boots clicked on the metal floor as she began to ascend.
<Gai, Neji, Lee - get out. Right now.> We'd - alright, they'd - moved too quickly, she'd been here the entire time, she'd seen everything. Her uncle was right there, and now - <Don't ask questions, don't say anything, don't draw any attention just get out right the fuck now.>
And they did, even as I hurried across the room and up the dais myself.
The woman who would be daimyo stared down at the body of her uncle, her usurper, her captor. Gai had beat him savagely; Gate-enhanced strikes had torn the power core from his armor and rent the metal as if it were paper. His eyes could not be seen under the bruises; his chest rose and fell only faintly. At this moment, he was more powerless and impotent than those who had lived and suffered under his reign.
I drew my knife once more, proffered the hilt.
"Do you want to kill him, Koyuki?"
At first, I didn't know if she heard me, before I saw that her head had tilted to the side, just a little.
I didn't know what was going through her mind. But I could guess, at least a little. This was the man who had irrevocably changed her life - who had killed her father, if not also her mother, had condemned her people to poverty and authoritarian repression. The man who had held a knife to her throat, thrown her in prison, made all manner of creepy advances on his own fucking niece in the scant time they had seen each other in over a decade.
If anyone had the right to take Doto's life, she did.
Her hand reached for the blade.
Fingers curled slightly around the handle.
And with great effort and reluctance, pushed it away.
"...Yeah," I nodded, stepping back, as she circled the unconscious man. "Makes sense. Take him prisoner, put him on trial. Some sort of Truth and Reconciliation tribunal, big public show of things. Everyone knows what he's done, but this way it'll be the nation that'll deliver the verdict - death or imprisonment until death, whatever you prefer. That'll probably have good knock-on effects, too; allow for more national healing, yes, but also show that you're committed to the rule of law - give international investors confidence in your reign moving forward, and-"
The Kazahana's eyes were cinched shut as she stood in front of an empty throne, in an empty room, littered with her defeated foes. She choked back a sob, a bead of water beginning to form at the corner of her eye. But she held fast, even as she choked back another, her hands clenched into fists.
Another.
And another.
But the dam had to break eventually.
Koyuki fell to her knees, weeping, her arms upon the velvet lap of the one chair in the room, her shoulders heaving as they tried to divest themselves of a yoke they'd carried for far too long.
…I was intruding, just as much as the others in Team Gai had been. Quietly, I made to leave-
"W-wait," the words were faint, muffled as they were by heavy fabric. "Stay. Please."
I stayed.
The formal coronation of Kazehana Koyuki as daimyo for the Land of Snow occurred a month after the fall of the Doto government. This delay had not been due to the need for any sort of pacification campaign - indeed, with the fall of the man himself and his "elite" jonin, many high-ranking officials had voluntarily surrendered, with others outright defecting. The people and resistance movements (what was left of them, for the railroad massacre had only taken out the most hotheaded and radical elements) had been overjoyed to see their overlord gone; apparently, I was, in fact, the odd man out with my theories on monarchism.
No, this delay was caused by two major issues. The first was the need for the proper rites and ceremonies to be observed: the Land of Snow wanted a proper coronation, a true celebration of renewal in a land known for its harshness. Koyuki's reign needed to be ushered in with all the appropriate gravitas, to wash away the memory of her despised uncle.
The second was that the daimyo was still, in fact, under contract to produce the latest Adventures of Princess Fūun movie. I missed the first week of shooting, due to Koyuki's insistence that I be treated for my injuries at one of the Land of Snow's hospitals. While we weren't technically her bodyguards, our job wasn't done until she was installed - I did not take to being hospitalized well. Having access to chakra healing had spoiled me, and I was impatient to get back out there. They also had refused to let me play my tonkori while I was in there; on the upside, it'd given me the time to tighten up the lyrics on my translation.
It was a beautiful coronation procession. The day was a balmy zero degrees Celsius, with only light flurries; lavender banners with the sigil of the Land of Snow (what I'd taken for bat wings were in fact an negative abstraction of a snowman) were everywhere, and even the presence of the hated bagpipes could not sour my mood as the daimyo was paraded through the grand boulevard of the capital to the cheering, adoring crowd.
As foreign shinobi, we weren't in the procession itself, of course. But we were guests of honor at the banquet and reception afterwards. Most officials and locals avoided us; Sandayu had greeted us, but was extremely busy in his new role as prime minister trying to integrate and reform… pretty much everything. Even (or perhaps especially) during a ceremonial occasion such as this.
As for the film crew? Koyuki had put them to work - having a famous director on-site during a coronation was a godsend for her PR. And Makino was probably having the time of his life getting to explore being a documentarian.
"Ahhhh," Gai sighed, from our position near one of the buffet tables. "An excellent mission, my students! Well done! Truly, this is the springtime! Of all our youths!"
"Yus!" Lee thrust a hand into the air, the other holding onto a plate stuffed with canapes. "This was an amazing mission, Gai-sensei!"
"It… really was," Neji acknowledged. "We got to rescue Nobunaga."
I rolled my eyes at the Hyuga. "Ass."
"Pardon me," came a very familiar voice. "Am I interrupting?"
"N-not at all, Kazehana-sama," Neji paled, bowing at the newly installed daimyo. She was dressed in ceremonial attire; rich robes of lavender; overgarments of red and yellow and turquoise. Her hair was done up in a formal bun, and the knotwork on the sash at her waist would have Alexander the Great instinctively reach for his sword.
There was also a lightness to Kazehana Koyuki now; a serenity and calmness that had not been present when we had first met. That was not to say she couldn't be stressed, or upset, or unhappy - one time during filming a particularly tricky scene ten days before the coronation she'd thrown a fit at the director after Take Seventy-Five - but at her core, she seemed to have finally found the path that suited her best.
"Kazehana-sama," the rest of Team Gai, myself included, also greeted her, bowing.
Koyuki smiled at us all, but shook her head slightly. "Please," she informed us. "None of that. Out of everyone in the world, if anyone has the right to call me 'Koyuki,' it is you four. Because without you, nobody would ever call me -sama outside the frame of a camera."
"Aa-as you wish, K-koyuki," Neji stammered, but I caught the glint of mischief in the former actress' eye; she'd timed her entrance to catch him off balance.
"Koyuki," I began, and my use of her name brought a smile to her lips. "How may we assist?"
"I am the daimyo of the Land of Snow now," Koyuki stated. "And one of the most important things for my country to become prosperous once again is the opening up once more of trade. But before we can do that," she hesitated. "The Hex Crystal - it is a sacred treasure of my clan. I know you had the best intentions, Nobunaga, but to have such an object in another country's possession-"
I held up a hand.
"I did tell Doto that I sent it away," I informed her, my other hand moving to my pouch. "That was me ah, employing the ancient ninja art…." I activated the scroll within the pouch, and withdrew the crystal, offering the thing back to its rightful owner. "Of fuckin' lying."
Koyuki's eyes misted over, and she wiped a tear from them as she giggled, Her head bent down, and it took me half a second to realize what she wanted - I looped her family's treasure back around her neck, and she straightened up, favoring me with a smile.
"Thank you," she said. "For keeping it safe."
"Of course," I replied immediately. "I apologize for not remembering I had it."
"Is there anything else we can do to be of service, Koyuki-sama," Gai interjected. I started, just a little - somehow, I'd forgotten my own jonin was even there.
"There is," Koyuki confirmed. "Doto plundered our ninja traditions in the coup; kept us weak collectively so that he could retain power. I know we will be relying on Konoha for many years to come. I expect that your Hokage will be sending advisors, yes?"
Gai nodded. "Indeed," the jonin replied. "But if you would ask for Team Gai to be one of those advisory teams… I must regretfully decline, Koyuki-sama. Even as we helped you take back what was yours, we would be a poor fit for your needs now that you have it."
"I understand," the daimyo responded, inclining her head. "But that is not what I would ask."
Koyuki turned to face me. "Nobunaga," eyes the color of crystalline water touched mine. "Stay here with me. You saw the potential my land, my people hold- please, help me continue what my father started."
There was more she wanted to say; oceans of meaning churned beneath her gaze, pleading with me. But we were in public, and those were words that could not be said here.
"What?!"
"No!"
"Nobunaga, you can't-"
I took a deep breath.
Another.
"I-" I began, then had to quickly recompose myself. Square my shoulders, keep my gaze level. "You honor me greatly, Koyuki. Please. May I have some time to think it over?"
"Of course." She was disappointed that I hadn't accepted; so was I. But she was also hopeful, because I hadn't said no.
So was I.
And yet, also the opposite.
The daimyo was an actress in addition to being a ruler, and so she recovered far more smoothly and easily than I; glancing to the side, she smiled slightly and leaned in toward our group, slightly conspiratorially.
"Did you know," she winked. "That the producer had the audacity to offer me a contract for an adaptation of Icha Icha Paradise? Can you believe it?"
And after a few more lines of small talk, she was off, the crowd eager to bask in and ask for the favor of their daimyo.
"Nobunaga," Lee asked hesitantly. "You- you aren't really going to-"
Gai put a hand on his student's shoulder. "Lee," our jonin spoke politely but firmly. "No man can dictate the dream of another."
Team Gai fell silent. The party continued on. I traced the movement of the daimyo, until she faded and disappeared into her crowd.
Team Gai were the honored guests of Her Royal Highness the daimyo of the Land of Snow - our quarters were not devoid of luxury.
I didn't sleep that night. I sat on a backless couch on a balcony overlooking a frankly breathtaking view of palace, city, and mountains, a comforter containing the feathers of an entire sub-species of goose collapsed around my shoulders, tonkori in my hands, pondering the future.
I could stay.
I could stay here.
And I could build.
I could build this place up - I could do here what had been done to South Korea; a dictatorship with a GDP per capita of 800 dollars to a democracy with one of the highest human development indices on the planet. I knew the playbook. I could lay down my weaponry; cast aside my jutsu; and live my own goddamn life.
The wind howled in time to my idly plucked, discordant notes.
I didn't know this story.
I didn't know what had been changed - if I'd even changed anything at all, really. The attack on the Chunin Exams? Definitely had happened in canon - and my contribution there hadn't really been anything. I'd tutored some clan kids who probably would have gotten tutoring on their own; my brother was still an immature little shit, so I probably hadn't done anything there, either.
Subtitle? Hadn't managed to affect the outcome of that attack. And besides - it was an obvious use of genjutsu; someone probably would've come up with something similar at a later point. Hell, for all I knew, I'd merely sniped Ino or Shikamaru's invention by a few years.
No, this line of thought wasn't worth anything.
If I left Konoha… I'd be leaving behind my brother. Gai. Lee. Neji. The ramen stand my brother adored, and the udon stand that I maintained was slightly better. I had built something resembling a life in the Leaf, however shallow those roots were.
My thoughts then turned towards the future - the shape of things to come. Because while I did not know the story, I at least knew the genre. Even if my place in it had somehow disrupted things - Naruto should have fought Gaara at the finals. That had definitely been the canonical outcome, before the attack had occurred.
But that was the past - the future could be summed up in a single word: escalation. With three Great Shinobi World Wars in the past, and a mentor who had created a legend during the last one, Naruto would almost certainly be thrust into a Fourth. Against whom? Our traditional enemies were Rock and Cloud, so that seemed a decent starting position. Orochimaru and Hidden Sound were also obvious candidates.
Would my brother succeed? Yes.
…Maybe.
I didn't know what my being here meant.
"Or maybe," I murmured, into the frigid night air. "I'm looking at this all wrong."
What sort of person would make the choices in front of me?
Koyuki received me in her throne room - an entire wall of which were rice-paper screened windows, allowing for plenty of light. Dark-stained wood flooring was covered in tatami matting save for the throne itself, backless, one with its own dais, and crowned in its own tyrian purple curtained pavilion.
The curtains were open; the room quiet and empty save for the two of us as I approached.
"Koyuki," I said, the words carrying as I knelt, one hand over my heart, the other carrying the tonkori.
"...Your eyes are red," she observed. "You've made your decision."
"You… are going to be an amazing daimyo," I closed my eyes, wiped the tears away. "You really are. I want you to know that. I don't want you to think I'm insulting you or denigrating you or- mocking or anything of the sort."
"I would never," she swore, hands clenching the arms of her chair like shackles. "You gave me my legacy back, Uzumaki Nobunaga - you will always be welcome here."
I bowed my head. "Thank you, Koyuki. I, ah, have a gift for you. In apology, in congratulations, for… for lots of reasons, really."
Her eyes shone brightly for reasons that had nothing to do with the sun.
"You've strung that thing wrong," her voice quavered slightly.
I shook my head. "Nah," I gave the instrument an experimental strum, then tightened one of the strings. Standing up, I took a ready position completely at odds with the entire tradition of the instrument. "I really haven't."
My eyes closed. Deep breath in. Deep breath out. Calm. Centered.
"Don't cry, Koyuki," I murmured. "I wrote you a song."
Playing chords and a rhythm from a land that only existed in my memories, I began to sing.
The only thing I could do as we ascended was unclip my pouch, letting it fall to the ground even as jagged stalks and spikes of ice exploded all around us, keeping my teammates from reaching us in time. Gai probably could have done it - but at the cost of leaving Neji and Lee behind?
No, he couldn't have.
Koyuki might have been screaming, but the wind whistling in my ears drowned out any other sounds. I had to think quickly - there wasn't much time before we reached the airship.
Assets - one princess, slightly used, and everything that wasn't in my pouch or storage scroll. That did include a knife, so I could very easily stab the ninja who was reeling us in -
- but that would be counterproductive. Lethality was a tool like any other. With the element of surprise? Sure, I could kill that man. But - I'd still be on an airship with no easy way down.
No, my fate had been sealed the moment I'd decided to hold on rather than letting go. Dammit.
Of course, I couldn't let them know that.
And I had my own pride, dammit.
"Gotcha!" the cyborg ogre that Doto Kazahana had in his employ grunted as he grabbed Koyuki by the scruff of her neck - right before I got him with a rabbit punch right in the schnozz, pushing him away from the railing and what would be a very messy way to die for all of us.
"Ah!" he skidded across the metal grating.
"Koyuki!" I shouted, "Get inside! Quickly!"
We rushed past him, and I quickly locked the submarine-style door behind us, jamming the wheel with my dagger.
The interior of the ship was, of course, lousy with enemy ninja. But that was fine, because none of them seemed to be wearing the Taiji-chakra armor of the nin we'd fought.
Which meant it was open season.
First Gate: Gate of Opening - Release!
Once more the veil lifted from my eyes, mind and body unifying to become one. I became aware of each and every presence in my field of vision.
Flashbang no Jutsu!
The veiled Snow-nin cried out in pain, and I went on the offense. Fists flashed; kicks arced - I let myself go, and simply be in the fight.
I took them as a scythe, and they fell before me.
Up close? My skill at taijutsu far exceeded theirs.
Further away? I was in a target-rich environment; they could not use area attacks for fear of hitting their comrades, and those they dared deploy I could easily avoid. The Gate of Opening gave me near-prescience, such was its boost to my processing speed. Was this why the Uchiha were so feared? Not all of the clan could have been as powerful as the old monsters but for even their weakest to be at this level…
"Enough!" A deep bass growled.
The Snow-nin stopped.
A fat-faced, fat-chinned man whose richly embroidered robes nonetheless hid a warrior's build and armor stood before me, a kunai held to Koyuki's carotid artery.
"Surrender," he ordered me.
"I'm sorry," the princess whispered, before she was cut off by a painful twist of her wrist.
"You surrender to me?" I laughed. "I accept."
"Bravado," Doto - for who else could it be? - scoffed. "Will not help you here, boy."
"Yeah, well-" I began, only for something very heavy to hit me, right in the small of my back. I slumped back down, the First Gate closing off.
"No!"
"-thank you, Mizore," Doto rumbled, as the cyborg drifted into my line of sight. Squinting, I noticed a detail about the giant.
"Hey," I wheezed. "Is that a new arm? Man, my teammate must have-"
He kicked me, right in the ribs. Then, he drew back to do it again.
"Now now, Mizore," Doto held up a hand. "Plenty of time for that later. There are ladies present. Koyuki - the years have only made you grow more beautiful."
Oh that was so wrong on so many levels. I opened my mouth to say something - spat out a little blood instead.
Probably for the best, to be honest; didn't have anything worth interrupting a monologue for, what with abandoning my pouch prior to boarding. For once, not the airline's fault. Only took a universe hop to do it.
"-Hex Crystal?"
Koyuki tried to be very very still, but the poor thing was trembling.
"Y-yes."
"Hand it over."
She tried; she really did. A gloved hand twitched uselessly at her side; more than anything, it looked like the true ruler of the Land of Snow was having a seizure. It was a miracle that she didn't impale herself on her uncle's blade.
"...I can't," she whispered. "...Around my nec-"
Brusquely, he reached below her pink jacket and tore the grey shard free; his brutish features split into a smile as he beheld what he had been seeking.
"Ah," he sighed. "The key to the secret treasure of this land."
"S-ssecret… treasure?" Koyuki asked, shivering, though not from the cold. I admired that about her - she was trying to exert some measure of control over the situation, trying to figure something out.
"When I took control of this land, the Kazahana had nothing." Doto stepped away from his niece, heavy boots thudding against the deck. Without his frame to threaten her, she collapsed; the two of us were now both on the floor, surrounded by hostile nin. "All the wealth that had been flowing in to this land… he could not have spent it all on his little toys. Sosetsu must have hidden his riches somewhere. And I found it - a vault in the Rainbow Glacier; a keyhole in the shape of the Hex Crystal-"
I could no longer hold it in.
Laughter. Mad, maniacal laughter at the expense of this idiot who had squandered the wealth of a rising power.
…And there was that kick that he'd put off.
"The arrogance of the Leaf never ceases to amaze," Doto rumbled. "Let's test that device on him. Maybe that will keep him civil?"
Device? What device?
One of the Snow-nin we'd fought - the girl - knelt over me, a sadistic smile on her face. Pain suddenly erupted right where my ribcage ended.
"Say good-bye to your chakra~" she half-sang, mockingly, but I had the last laugh.
The device shocked me the moment it made skin contact. Harsh electricity surged through my body, and the only reason why I didn't erupt into discordant screams was because that same bitter voltage locked my jaw into place. Simultaneously, though, the Hex Crystal in Doto's hand popped away with a puff of smoke, leaving behind a piece of costume jewelry from Makino's production.
"What?!" he roared. "Where is it?! Where is the crystal!"
"Heh," I wheezed. "Heh heh heh heh heh-" I broke out into a fit of coughing, which abruptly ended when Mizore smashed open the nearest window on the airship, and made as if to throw me out it. Or just dangle me. He had options. Maybe not the brainpower to realize it, though.
"Where is it," he grunted.
"At this point?" I tried to shrug, which was surprisingly difficult when you were being dragged like a sack of potatoes. "Probably the Hokage's desk. First class postage is a beautiful thing - sent it off right before the ship weighed anchor-"
The mook threw me to the ground, yelling in frustration. Doto made a thoughtful sound.
"Clever boy," he mused. "But little matter. After all, Senju Nobunaga-"
Those words were almost more painful than all the kicks and electricity put together.
"The Hokage's son will make a fine hostage for its safe return."
Somewhere, a broken little laugh was made.
"The Hokage doesn't have a son."
"Oh," Doto smiled. "I highly doubt that."
The prison cell they threw me into was carved into hollowed rock - from the looks of things, it had probably been a mine, once. The chained up skeletons of previous inhabitants occupied numerous cells around me, their ghastly grinning visages seeming to make mockery of the mere notion of escape.
It was cold; there was no heating or the like, and the only light came from dim blue bulbs set into sconces set at regular intervals between cells. We seemed to be underground. They had chained my manacled hands above my head - my feet were in irons and chained to the ground as well, and I was suspended maybe a foot off the ground. Stuck in my gut was the chakra suppressor, its central probe deeply unsettling and its ancillary wires pinpricks of discomfort as they rubbed and chafed against my skin and vest and undershirt. Whenever I instinctively tried to draw on my chakra, the device would crackle with electricity; the shocks were painful enough to break my concentration and violently dissuade me from doing so.
Honestly, I was more than a little insulted by this treatment. Did they think I was merely some sort of political dissident or protestor? I was a goddamn ninja from fucking Konohagakure - were there no standards?
Eh. Their loss, really.
Fucking. Amateurs.
For all the Land of Snow's technological prowess, they hadn't seemed to outfit these cells with CCTV. Even better - as I waited patiently for the first appearance of a guard (the better to understand what sort of rotation I'd be working with), two arrived, escorting none other than Koyuki herself to the cell right across from me.
They didn't bother to shackle her - just lock her behind the bars, place a seal on the keyhole, and walk away.
…Yeah.
Amateurs.
The only reason I didn't burst out laughing was because the chakra suppressor was an awkward weight right in my center of mass and it would have drawn unnecessary attention. I waited for the guard's footsteps to fade away - and then planned to wait several more minutes so that they'd grow bored if they were planning to listen in when the princess preempted me.
"So you're a prince, too."
"Fuck you," I spat. "Take those words back right fucking now."
The light was dim but it still glittered across her level gaze.
"Senju," she replied. "I read that Senju Tsunade is the new leader of the ninja in the Land of Fire. Senju Hashirama was the first ninja leader-"
"-the word is 'Hokage'-" I grunted.
"-Hokage," she conceded, though something in her tone indicated that she knew the term already. "And you are her son. Senju Nobunaga."
"Uzumaki. Uzumaki! Nobunaga!"
She let out a short, almost unlady-like bark of laughter. "What's the difference? Your mother is the Hokage-"
"-I am an orphan!" The words erupted from my mouth. "My mother gave me up when I was a baby! But now that she's Hokage, sure! We're all just part of one big happy family! Man up, Nobunaga, and grin and bear it! You're part of a legacy now! Never mind what you've done yourself, eh?"
Koyuki was unreadable. "And to think you scolded me for attempting to build my own life away from my family."
"We aren't alike, Koyuki," I spat. "You had a family - you had something, and it was taken from you. Something precious and beautiful and wonderful and-and then you didn't. I was raised in the gutter. I became a ninja because I had talent and the orphan's stipend ends when you hit sixteen, and I had a little brother who was going to get himself killed if I didn't do something about it. A prince, princess? I'm no prince."
And then, almost to myself: "I don't deserve the Senju name."
Koyuki remained where she was, slumped against the near wall of her cell. "Well, it doesn't matter much where we are now, does it?" Her words were quiet, but I could still hear them. "Prince, princess, ninja? We're both trapped here."
That, at least, got me chuckling.
"What?" The actress' petulance was adorable - it was almost painful to laugh. "What?"
"'M sorry," I wheezed. "'S'painful to laugh oh it hurts oooh. But your uncle? Way too much time putting down peasants, not enough time dealing with actual professionals. And if our little heart-to-heart didn't get the guards running…."
Twisting my wrists together, I reached into the inside of my sleeve and retrieved one of the lockpicks that was secreted there and produced it with a flourish. They really should have stripped me down, put me in some sort of prisoner's garb. Pulling myself up on the manacles, the better to see what I was doing, I jiggled the lock - and was disgusted by how easy it was to open them. Honestly, the rust on the mechanism was almost more of a problem than their complexity.
The shackles clicked open - my knees bent in anticipation, and I absorbed the shock of the blow easily. With my hands free, undoing the shackles on my feet was child's play and in less than two minutes, my freedom had increased by several orders of magnitude.
"Cell time," I muttered. "Seal on the door…."
I flicked the lockpick at space between the bars - an electric arc sizzled between them, illuminating the jagged piece of metal. Oh, fun.
"I would have gone for a more conceptual barrier, personally," I continued, aware that the princess' attention remained firmly on me. "But again - amateur hour. The barrier is tied to the paper seal on the keyhole. Therefore…"
Producing a straight pin, I simply rammed it through the lock, puncturing the seal entirely, and rendering the thing useless. And once it'd been neutralized, picking the actual cell door was likewise simplicity in and of itself.
"And voila," I finished, pushing the door open carefully, because the hinges were rusty, and I didn't want to make too much unnecessary noise. "Now, do you want me to walk through yours or should I just do it for you?"
Koyuki let out a sound that was half-laugh, half-sob.
"Even if we escape," she choked out. "What does it matter? We'll be alone. My father died, and I escaped, and I ran, and I ran. I lied. I've lied for so long, to so many people - even to myself. But no matter how far I've run, how many lies I've told… I ended up back here. I'm tired, Nobunaga. So… tired."
"Here's the truth," I informed her. "There's a tracking seal in the liner of my, ah, headband; the others know where we are, and they're probably on their way even now. Your uncle is going down. Tonight. That's happening. You're tired, but the nightmare is almost over.
"It might be safer if you stay in that cell," I continued. "I wouldn't blame you in the slightest. But I've had to bodyguard you all through production, Koyuki; you're just enough of a spiteful bitch-"
She glared at me, and I reveled in it.
"-that you want to see him finally brought down," I finished. "Because any other way, without it being just as visceral as the day he took everything from you… I don't think you won't ever really leave this place."
"...You just love the sound of your own voice, don't you?" she noted, a faint smile playing across her lips. "Open the door, please."
Even without access to my chakra, I could take out a pair of Snow-nin guards, especially given that they were distracted by the explosions we'd all felt on the other side of the building we were in. It was admittedly more difficult than I would have liked, especially because I had to refrain from even infusing my chakra for fear of getting jolted, but what was the point of all that intensive conditioning and training if not for a situation such as this? Even injured as I was, I was a member of Team Gai.
Even still, an "Oh fuck," ripped out of me when Koyuki and I got off the prison's elevator and another pair of guards were waiting for us. Could I do it? Probably. Was it going to suck? Definitely. Even still, needs must-
"Super Senbon!"
An ulna-sized rod smacked into the temple of one guard, and ricocheted into the top of the other's head, knocking both of them out.
"Nobunaga!" Lee, Gai and Neji waved at us.
"What took you so long?" I grinned. "Another ten minutes, and we'd have taken care of Doto without you?"
"Ha!" my jonin laughed, throwing me my supply pouch. Excellent. I had so much shit stored in there, mostly in the scroll, but there was also a spare knife, and senbon. "Indomitable as ever, chunin!"
"What happened to 'if captured, stay in one place, it'll be easier for rescue operations,' Nobunaga?" Neji snarked at me.
"I got bored." My reply was accompanied by an idle wave of the hand, along with a twist to indicate Koyuki. "The hospitality here? Not great. I need to speak to the manager… immediately."
The princess giggled despite herself, as she was greeted in turn.
Gai's eyes narrowed, though, when his attention returned to me . "Nobunaga," he stated. "You are injured."
"Yeah," I grunted. "Jus- just a bit."
"And what is that." Neji added, flatly.
"Chakra suppressor. If you would-" I had to twist out of the way before my teammate clawed it off of me. "Fuck! Gently, Neji, gently! There are wires in my skin, and it shocks me if I try to use chakra! Also, I'd like to keep it intact if possible."
"Why?!"
"You are his teammates," Koyuki remarked, leaning against the railing as she caught her breath. "I believe you can figure it out."
"I like her!" Lee flashed the princess a thumbs-up. "I guess you and Nobunaga had a good talk while you were captured?"
"Can we please just focus on the mission?" I interjected smoothly. "Because-ow!"
Using one of my knives, Gai had sliced through the wires with the utmost precision; with his free hand, he'd twisted the main body of the chakra suppressor out.
It hurt.
Oh god, it hurt so good.
Chakra, even when not being actively infused, made you stronger, faster, tougher, and more relevantly - promoted healing. Not to the level of Wolverine or anything, but it was still a noticeable difference to someone with a second life's worth of memories.
"What's the plan?" I groaned, reaching out as Gai handed me the suppressor, and tucking it into the scroll.
"Doto should still be here," Gai stated. "We hit the, ah, carriage house-"
"-garage-"
"Where his flying machine was stabled, which will make any retreat difficult. The local resistance provided us with a map of this place - a man such as Doto?" Gai smirked. "He can only be in one place."
Koyuki nodded. "Yes. The throne room." The Land of Snow's rightful heir set off before we could respond. "This way."
The room in question was built for the power play - bare, big, industrial, and ostentatious, with a dark seal shaped like bat wings staining the metal tiles of the floor. A steep staircase ramped up to the obscene dais where the chair itself stood - the only piece of furniture, and the only thing which did not match the decor. It looked like a relic from a different Land of Snow, dark-stained wood, and maroon velvet.
My jonin and Koyuki were right - Doto was waiting for us.
Below him were the three ninja we'd fought on the iceberg, and that I'd encountered on the airship.
"So you have come to die," the dictator rumbled. "You slink into my land like thieves in the night; retreat in the face of my jonin; allow your chunin to be captured; and you think you have a chance against us?"
I'd known he was economically illiterate from his little rant on the airship, but I hadn't realized just how badly he'd succumbed to dictator disease - how poorly he'd gotten himself isolated from the flow of information. Chakra armor aside - we hadn't lost the encounter on the iceberg; our objective had been to protect and defend the film crew, not to eliminate enemy ninja. And while I could have handled the airship better - much better, I'd be running myself and Team Gai on bodyguard drills when we got back - once again, we'd traded tactical losses for operational and strategic advances.
Because however imposing this room was or intimidating his voice? The facts were clear - here we, a group of enemy ninja, were, in the heart of his territory.
Face to face with the target.
I drew my knife.
"Koyuki," I murmured, keeping my attention on the enemy. "Stay behind us; when the fighting starts, get out of the room, close the door behind you."
"Of course." Her breath ruffled against my hair, and tickled my ear.
The Snow-nin were still talking; if it were up to me, I would have pressed the attack already. But I was the chunin; Gai was the jonin.
"-famed Copy Ninja was forced to retreat by my prowess," the three-man squad's apparent leader was drawling. "You stand no chance, jumpsuit."
Gai merely let the echoes of his expression touch the corners of his eyes. "So you've mentioned. Perhaps-" His hands clapped together.
As did Lee's.
"-I should take you seriously. Eight Inner Gates: Sixth Gate - Gate of Joy - Open!"
"Eight Inner Gates: Fourth Gate - Gate of Pain - Open!"
The lavender-haired nin blinked. "Gate of wha-"
Three members of Team Gai fell upon the foe.
"Leaf Rock-Destroying Rise!"
"Leaf Hurricane!"
"Eight Trigrams: Thirty-Two Palms!"
Three Snow-nin crashed to the floor, broken and bloodied.
A green blur - Konoha's Noble Green Beast - flew up to meet a thunderstruck Doto.
"You hurt my student."
The sheer weight of the proclamation from Konoha's foremost expert in taijutsu would have had the man fall to his knees. But Guy would not allow him to do so.
"Dynamic… Action!"
The barrage that followed would have been a full minute of overcrank in the hands of a Snyder or a Bay; in reality, it lasted less than two seconds.
I sheathed my knife, sighing almost in disgust. "You know, I didn't get to do anything," I called out. "I'm the one who got captured here, you could have left me something. And just, I don't know, kicking them like this, feels kinda pathetic! I am just as val-"
Koyuki's boots clicked on the metal floor as she began to ascend.
<Gai, Neji, Lee - get out. Right now.> We'd - alright, they'd - moved too quickly, she'd been here the entire time, she'd seen everything. Her uncle was right there, and now - <Don't ask questions, don't say anything, don't draw any attention just get out right the fuck now.>
And they did, even as I hurried across the room and up the dais myself.
The woman who would be daimyo stared down at the body of her uncle, her usurper, her captor. Gai had beat him savagely; Gate-enhanced strikes had torn the power core from his armor and rent the metal as if it were paper. His eyes could not be seen under the bruises; his chest rose and fell only faintly. At this moment, he was more powerless and impotent than those who had lived and suffered under his reign.
I drew my knife once more, proffered the hilt.
"Do you want to kill him, Koyuki?"
At first, I didn't know if she heard me, before I saw that her head had tilted to the side, just a little.
I didn't know what was going through her mind. But I could guess, at least a little. This was the man who had irrevocably changed her life - who had killed her father, if not also her mother, had condemned her people to poverty and authoritarian repression. The man who had held a knife to her throat, thrown her in prison, made all manner of creepy advances on his own fucking niece in the scant time they had seen each other in over a decade.
If anyone had the right to take Doto's life, she did.
Her hand reached for the blade.
Fingers curled slightly around the handle.
And with great effort and reluctance, pushed it away.
"...Yeah," I nodded, stepping back, as she circled the unconscious man. "Makes sense. Take him prisoner, put him on trial. Some sort of Truth and Reconciliation tribunal, big public show of things. Everyone knows what he's done, but this way it'll be the nation that'll deliver the verdict - death or imprisonment until death, whatever you prefer. That'll probably have good knock-on effects, too; allow for more national healing, yes, but also show that you're committed to the rule of law - give international investors confidence in your reign moving forward, and-"
The Kazahana's eyes were cinched shut as she stood in front of an empty throne, in an empty room, littered with her defeated foes. She choked back a sob, a bead of water beginning to form at the corner of her eye. But she held fast, even as she choked back another, her hands clenched into fists.
Another.
And another.
But the dam had to break eventually.
Koyuki fell to her knees, weeping, her arms upon the velvet lap of the one chair in the room, her shoulders heaving as they tried to divest themselves of a yoke they'd carried for far too long.
…I was intruding, just as much as the others in Team Gai had been. Quietly, I made to leave-
"W-wait," the words were faint, muffled as they were by heavy fabric. "Stay. Please."
I stayed.
The formal coronation of Kazehana Koyuki as daimyo for the Land of Snow occurred a month after the fall of the Doto government. This delay had not been due to the need for any sort of pacification campaign - indeed, with the fall of the man himself and his "elite" jonin, many high-ranking officials had voluntarily surrendered, with others outright defecting. The people and resistance movements (what was left of them, for the railroad massacre had only taken out the most hotheaded and radical elements) had been overjoyed to see their overlord gone; apparently, I was, in fact, the odd man out with my theories on monarchism.
No, this delay was caused by two major issues. The first was the need for the proper rites and ceremonies to be observed: the Land of Snow wanted a proper coronation, a true celebration of renewal in a land known for its harshness. Koyuki's reign needed to be ushered in with all the appropriate gravitas, to wash away the memory of her despised uncle.
The second was that the daimyo was still, in fact, under contract to produce the latest Adventures of Princess Fūun movie. I missed the first week of shooting, due to Koyuki's insistence that I be treated for my injuries at one of the Land of Snow's hospitals. While we weren't technically her bodyguards, our job wasn't done until she was installed - I did not take to being hospitalized well. Having access to chakra healing had spoiled me, and I was impatient to get back out there. They also had refused to let me play my tonkori while I was in there; on the upside, it'd given me the time to tighten up the lyrics on my translation.
It was a beautiful coronation procession. The day was a balmy zero degrees Celsius, with only light flurries; lavender banners with the sigil of the Land of Snow (what I'd taken for bat wings were in fact an negative abstraction of a snowman) were everywhere, and even the presence of the hated bagpipes could not sour my mood as the daimyo was paraded through the grand boulevard of the capital to the cheering, adoring crowd.
As foreign shinobi, we weren't in the procession itself, of course. But we were guests of honor at the banquet and reception afterwards. Most officials and locals avoided us; Sandayu had greeted us, but was extremely busy in his new role as prime minister trying to integrate and reform… pretty much everything. Even (or perhaps especially) during a ceremonial occasion such as this.
As for the film crew? Koyuki had put them to work - having a famous director on-site during a coronation was a godsend for her PR. And Makino was probably having the time of his life getting to explore being a documentarian.
"Ahhhh," Gai sighed, from our position near one of the buffet tables. "An excellent mission, my students! Well done! Truly, this is the springtime! Of all our youths!"
"Yus!" Lee thrust a hand into the air, the other holding onto a plate stuffed with canapes. "This was an amazing mission, Gai-sensei!"
"It… really was," Neji acknowledged. "We got to rescue Nobunaga."
I rolled my eyes at the Hyuga. "Ass."
"Pardon me," came a very familiar voice. "Am I interrupting?"
"N-not at all, Kazehana-sama," Neji paled, bowing at the newly installed daimyo. She was dressed in ceremonial attire; rich robes of lavender; overgarments of red and yellow and turquoise. Her hair was done up in a formal bun, and the knotwork on the sash at her waist would have Alexander the Great instinctively reach for his sword.
There was also a lightness to Kazehana Koyuki now; a serenity and calmness that had not been present when we had first met. That was not to say she couldn't be stressed, or upset, or unhappy - one time during filming a particularly tricky scene ten days before the coronation she'd thrown a fit at the director after Take Seventy-Five - but at her core, she seemed to have finally found the path that suited her best.
"Kazehana-sama," the rest of Team Gai, myself included, also greeted her, bowing.
Koyuki smiled at us all, but shook her head slightly. "Please," she informed us. "None of that. Out of everyone in the world, if anyone has the right to call me 'Koyuki,' it is you four. Because without you, nobody would ever call me -sama outside the frame of a camera."
"Aa-as you wish, K-koyuki," Neji stammered, but I caught the glint of mischief in the former actress' eye; she'd timed her entrance to catch him off balance.
"Koyuki," I began, and my use of her name brought a smile to her lips. "How may we assist?"
"I am the daimyo of the Land of Snow now," Koyuki stated. "And one of the most important things for my country to become prosperous once again is the opening up once more of trade. But before we can do that," she hesitated. "The Hex Crystal - it is a sacred treasure of my clan. I know you had the best intentions, Nobunaga, but to have such an object in another country's possession-"
I held up a hand.
"I did tell Doto that I sent it away," I informed her, my other hand moving to my pouch. "That was me ah, employing the ancient ninja art…." I activated the scroll within the pouch, and withdrew the crystal, offering the thing back to its rightful owner. "Of fuckin' lying."
Koyuki's eyes misted over, and she wiped a tear from them as she giggled, Her head bent down, and it took me half a second to realize what she wanted - I looped her family's treasure back around her neck, and she straightened up, favoring me with a smile.
"Thank you," she said. "For keeping it safe."
"Of course," I replied immediately. "I apologize for not remembering I had it."
"Is there anything else we can do to be of service, Koyuki-sama," Gai interjected. I started, just a little - somehow, I'd forgotten my own jonin was even there.
"There is," Koyuki confirmed. "Doto plundered our ninja traditions in the coup; kept us weak collectively so that he could retain power. I know we will be relying on Konoha for many years to come. I expect that your Hokage will be sending advisors, yes?"
Gai nodded. "Indeed," the jonin replied. "But if you would ask for Team Gai to be one of those advisory teams… I must regretfully decline, Koyuki-sama. Even as we helped you take back what was yours, we would be a poor fit for your needs now that you have it."
"I understand," the daimyo responded, inclining her head. "But that is not what I would ask."
Koyuki turned to face me. "Nobunaga," eyes the color of crystalline water touched mine. "Stay here with me. You saw the potential my land, my people hold- please, help me continue what my father started."
There was more she wanted to say; oceans of meaning churned beneath her gaze, pleading with me. But we were in public, and those were words that could not be said here.
"What?!"
"No!"
"Nobunaga, you can't-"
I took a deep breath.
Another.
"I-" I began, then had to quickly recompose myself. Square my shoulders, keep my gaze level. "You honor me greatly, Koyuki. Please. May I have some time to think it over?"
"Of course." She was disappointed that I hadn't accepted; so was I. But she was also hopeful, because I hadn't said no.
So was I.
And yet, also the opposite.
The daimyo was an actress in addition to being a ruler, and so she recovered far more smoothly and easily than I; glancing to the side, she smiled slightly and leaned in toward our group, slightly conspiratorially.
"Did you know," she winked. "That the producer had the audacity to offer me a contract for an adaptation of Icha Icha Paradise? Can you believe it?"
And after a few more lines of small talk, she was off, the crowd eager to bask in and ask for the favor of their daimyo.
"Nobunaga," Lee asked hesitantly. "You- you aren't really going to-"
Gai put a hand on his student's shoulder. "Lee," our jonin spoke politely but firmly. "No man can dictate the dream of another."
Team Gai fell silent. The party continued on. I traced the movement of the daimyo, until she faded and disappeared into her crowd.
Team Gai were the honored guests of Her Royal Highness the daimyo of the Land of Snow - our quarters were not devoid of luxury.
I didn't sleep that night. I sat on a backless couch on a balcony overlooking a frankly breathtaking view of palace, city, and mountains, a comforter containing the feathers of an entire sub-species of goose collapsed around my shoulders, tonkori in my hands, pondering the future.
I could stay.
I could stay here.
And I could build.
I could build this place up - I could do here what had been done to South Korea; a dictatorship with a GDP per capita of 800 dollars to a democracy with one of the highest human development indices on the planet. I knew the playbook. I could lay down my weaponry; cast aside my jutsu; and live my own goddamn life.
The wind howled in time to my idly plucked, discordant notes.
I didn't know this story.
I didn't know what had been changed - if I'd even changed anything at all, really. The attack on the Chunin Exams? Definitely had happened in canon - and my contribution there hadn't really been anything. I'd tutored some clan kids who probably would have gotten tutoring on their own; my brother was still an immature little shit, so I probably hadn't done anything there, either.
Subtitle? Hadn't managed to affect the outcome of that attack. And besides - it was an obvious use of genjutsu; someone probably would've come up with something similar at a later point. Hell, for all I knew, I'd merely sniped Ino or Shikamaru's invention by a few years.
No, this line of thought wasn't worth anything.
If I left Konoha… I'd be leaving behind my brother. Gai. Lee. Neji. The ramen stand my brother adored, and the udon stand that I maintained was slightly better. I had built something resembling a life in the Leaf, however shallow those roots were.
My thoughts then turned towards the future - the shape of things to come. Because while I did not know the story, I at least knew the genre. Even if my place in it had somehow disrupted things - Naruto should have fought Gaara at the finals. That had definitely been the canonical outcome, before the attack had occurred.
But that was the past - the future could be summed up in a single word: escalation. With three Great Shinobi World Wars in the past, and a mentor who had created a legend during the last one, Naruto would almost certainly be thrust into a Fourth. Against whom? Our traditional enemies were Rock and Cloud, so that seemed a decent starting position. Orochimaru and Hidden Sound were also obvious candidates.
Would my brother succeed? Yes.
…Maybe.
I didn't know what my being here meant.
"Or maybe," I murmured, into the frigid night air. "I'm looking at this all wrong."
What sort of person would make the choices in front of me?
Koyuki received me in her throne room - an entire wall of which were rice-paper screened windows, allowing for plenty of light. Dark-stained wood flooring was covered in tatami matting save for the throne itself, backless, one with its own dais, and crowned in its own tyrian purple curtained pavilion.
The curtains were open; the room quiet and empty save for the two of us as I approached.
"Koyuki," I said, the words carrying as I knelt, one hand over my heart, the other carrying the tonkori.
"...Your eyes are red," she observed. "You've made your decision."
"You… are going to be an amazing daimyo," I closed my eyes, wiped the tears away. "You really are. I want you to know that. I don't want you to think I'm insulting you or denigrating you or- mocking or anything of the sort."
"I would never," she swore, hands clenching the arms of her chair like shackles. "You gave me my legacy back, Uzumaki Nobunaga - you will always be welcome here."
I bowed my head. "Thank you, Koyuki. I, ah, have a gift for you. In apology, in congratulations, for… for lots of reasons, really."
Her eyes shone brightly for reasons that had nothing to do with the sun.
"You've strung that thing wrong," her voice quavered slightly.
I shook my head. "Nah," I gave the instrument an experimental strum, then tightened one of the strings. Standing up, I took a ready position completely at odds with the entire tradition of the instrument. "I really haven't."
My eyes closed. Deep breath in. Deep breath out. Calm. Centered.
"Don't cry, Koyuki," I murmured. "I wrote you a song."
Playing chords and a rhythm from a land that only existed in my memories, I began to sing.
I have finished Naruto Kai, and Naruto: Road to Ninja. The only thing I have yet to see are filler and the final movie.
That's a hell of a sacrifice Nobunaga is making, even if few understand how much it is so.
It'll be interesting to see a Alt!Fic where he does stick around.
But I imagine that even then that both Naruto AND Teunade and Danzo would come dragging him back even had he decided to stick around the Land of Snow/Spring
It'll be interesting to see a Alt!Fic where he does stick around.
But I imagine that even then that both Naruto AND Teunade and Danzo would come dragging him back even had he decided to stick around the Land of Snow/Spring