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Self-Insert Idea Thread

I don't really care what the Insert chooses to do, as long as they have a motivation and take at least a few seconds to make a plan.
It doesn't have to work, but I would hope it has the possibility of working.
It feels like a lot of authors decide to be "reluctantly" dragged into the plot, so they don't spend any time actually thinking of what they would do since it won't matter anyway.
The end result is they look like complete idiots.

"I have no intention of getting involved, so I will actively seek out the main characters, draw as much attention as I can, then make no effort to get away... how did they find me!?"
 
Blaflaix said:
I don't really care what the Insert chooses to do, as long as they have a motivation and take at least a few seconds to make a plan.
It doesn't have to work, but I would hope it has the possibility of working.
It feels like a lot of authors decide to be "reluctantly" dragged into the plot, so they don't spend any time actually thinking of what they would do since it won't matter anyway.
The end result is they look like complete idiots.

"I have no intention of getting involved, so I will actively seek out the main characters, draw as much attention as I can, then make no effort to get away... how did they find me!?"
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
It's the TTRPG of the cloaked stranger sitting in ther corner of the pub, emitting JoJo auras and staring at the party. Any sane person would steer clear of some shady person waving around a giant "don't approach me" banner, but the player's face when the party just walks right past their character without stopping.

They've got no idea on how to actually go about things in regards to the plot, so they just try to remora onto the party and hope r the best. Even after, you'll notice they''ll follow the railroads like a locomotive, taking no real action on their own initiative.
 
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Thoughts on my idea?

I get inserted into Supernatural as a Djinn from Wishmaster my gem is found by Jessica a week or two before her death. Power wise I'm stronger than Michael but I can't use that power without a wish and while I may be a good guy 3 wishes still unleash the evil Djinn from their dimension and each one is as powerful as a Seraphim and there are millions of them. So I gotta stay under the Winchester radar until I can convince them I'm not evil, I gotta get Jessica to make preferably one wish that could give me a little more freedom so I can interfere on behalf of humanity but keep her from making 3 wishes since I'm not evil and don't wanna start an invasion of evil Wishmaster Djinn.
 
I find that self insert character to be much more capable and are given more opportunity to act with that said power than any normal human could be even if story wise the self insert is not powerful or given any power up at all.

If i became self insert and i find myself braver, more charismatic, more motivated or more capable to training and self improvement, i would be eternally grateful for a chance to make my life more meaningful.
 
I had the idea of being reincarnated as an ordinary Changeling drone from MLP with no Meta knowledge. I would live a relativly normal life as a caretaker of the nymphs, until they notice that I raise unusually good inflitraitors. So I would be put in charge for promising younglings and I would tell them stories about the world, how to question things, about introspection and observation, how to be corious etc. They would be better inflitraitors but without the blind loyality, especially because they rarely come back to the hive. The butterflies would be that a few would go rogue and would kick of the plot with Thorax of way earlier with an actual group as we are an internal (secret) fraction of the Hive.

I hope I got my idea across well enough.
 
I uh, have an weird, probably sounding like a weird Self-Insert Idea.

Which is uh..*checking notes* The world has ended, or more importantly, the whole universe decided it had enough and terminated itself through some weird, weird, ways overnight (probably Eldritch Abomination ways), the Self-Insert doesn't notice it because he's friggin' sleeping, next day he wakes up, doesn't notice the universe got terminated, he does his morning ritual until he realizes at some point in time due to some things missing that he knows, are very, very integral to his morning ritual, in this case, an obsessive level habit like drawing. Then he realizes some more things, mundane things around his house, his family more gone than usual. He decides to go around the house and notice that, huh.

Everyone's gone. He suspects they've gone on an unannounced office meeting since it's practically common, but he notices more things around his house. after double-searching every corner of the house except his parent's bedroom (it was always locked when they leave.) He surprisingly could open it. and then oh-shit, it looks like everyone is dead, because look around audience, everybody has turned to t a n g.

and then he blacks out too, probably turned to tang too.

but of course, since he's now a certified/about-to-become-Self-insert, it sounds like a common thing.

and of course, he wakes up again, he doesn't suspect anything has happened, because, wowie, wowie, memory alteration has removed that, so he actually, gets woken up by someone, yay! but it's someone he absolutely, has no idea who the fuck they are. So this is great. he decides to, fuck this, let's just go with it, it's my house anyways, and they're probably a hired maid that his step-father knew somewhere. so he goes down the spiraling stairs, down to the living room merged with the kitchen and sees...

holy shit, who the fuck are these people at my parent's dining table.

and cut. this is of course, mystery kinda SI beginning, I'm going to just say, fuck romance, fuck power it's infectious and of course, misunderstandings abound, since I'm going to make this is a literal dream-jump-chain with the beginning, something else. oh and Eldritch Abominations, may appear.

so, is this a great, idea?

Edit: I just realized this is a better beginning for my SI than the original, also, I also realized, Tony Stark Starring as the Eldritch Abomination, and the one to welcome the dear SI by doing a speech about society passive-aggressively and also always including the words "your my cosmic plaything/boytoy" whenever he can while walking around the Empty Avengers Tower and ordering up a lower-class Eldritch Being only to end it by crushing it's head by stepping on it and then the passive-aggressive society speech ends and he pushes the SI where they were sitting and then they fall and they see him grinning like a dick and then they realize they're falling into a hole with a mouth. like, oh my god this was a great idea.
 
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An idea, half based on kind of wanting to do a BTVS SI like I once tried and failed to do as a tween and half just seeing it as a useful angle to deconstruct a BTVS fanfiction trope I used to like when I was shameful and trash (and also mess with some other fanfiction tricks).

The basics? Halloween fiction. The SI inserted a bit ago, and tries to take advantage of the episode where everyone gets turned into their costumes to pick up some permanent superpowers in true cliche fashion. Of course, permanent is not what that event is supposed to do. So she tries to bypass it by dressing as Sara Pezzini, host of the Witchblade. She's from a comic that started basically as an excuse to destroy a pretty woman's clothes every issue but that actually has a lot of really interesting lore and has told some pretty great stories. The Witchblade is this ancient artifact-thing, a gauntlet that can only be worn by women created by a union between its universes primal light/dark forces. If it doesn't like the wearer it will take their arm. If it likes them, it can provide armor and weapons from itself (generally by extending it like pseudo-organic growths destroying whatever is in the way in the process, because yeah that is what started this), hide as a bracelet, do a mean flamethrower impersonation, and a bunch of other weird mysic shit. It also gets pretty temperamental if not used, as it does have its own intelligence and at times can act on its own or be heard by its wearer.

The reason the SI thinks this might work as a bypass is that it can sort of eat magic and sometimes no-sell spells. She hopes that it will self-sustain. And it sort of works. She gets a much weaker knockoff Witchblade out of the deal (putting the SI on a power level BTVS as a setting is comfortable with instead of Full Comic Book). But it's not the genuine article, and as such is twisted by the different metaphysics, the nature of the spell (it's basically continually spending energy to not turn back into costume jewelry), and the whole hellmouth situation. It needs to kill magical stuff, eat magic and lifeforce on the regular. And if it can't, it will start to eat the SI. And as it grows stronger, yearning to reach the power of the actual Witchblade it remembers having, so too does its appetite. So the SI's arm is slowly being permanently replaced by metal, a ticking clock for the story. She has the power to save people, to change the story. But it will eventually kill her unless she can remove it (which would probably piss the Witchblade off, a problem in its own right) or find a way to actually fix the Witchblade enough to make it... 'real', I guess? Which is the sort of thing several characters in BTVS might be able to help with, but they are IIRC all villains.

(essentially the idea is to use the cliche halloween powerup idea to cause more problems than it solves and create conflicts)
 
Okay, so I was reading the fanfic Frankenstone earlier, and I had for an SI Fanfic.

As 'usual', the SI (who I'll call Anon for now) finds themselves waking up as a character in the SUniverse, albeit with a twist; their the fusion of the Crystal Gems (Steven included), Peridot, Lapis, Bismuth and Connie during the final confrontation against the Diamonds. While initially extremely confused, Anon (being knowledgeable of the SUniverse to some degree, naturally) quickly recognises the situation and immediately moves to reach the mech's eyes. After the constituents defuse, however, things start getting weird. Namely, Anon sticks around as a ghost, visible enough to be plainly seen but transparent enough to find themselves far and away better at sneaking around then anything their size should feasibly be by rights. And (as everyone eventually learns) their able to possess anything that could act as a semi-feasible body, albeit with it having to be of similar size and shape. Of course, not wanting to alter the timeline any more than it already has been, Anon stays back and let's things play out. However, immediately after the scene where White Diamond blushes, someone (could be one of the Crystal Gems, one of the Diamonds or a background gem) notices Anon and points them out. Things go haywire from there.
 
So I was reading yet another Sensei|All For One is Midoriya Hisashi fic and I was inspired with an idea for an SI fic.

So the SI is reborn as either Midoriya Izuku or his sibling/twin, and their father, Midoriya Hisashi is All For One. The SI probably doesn't know this in the beginning even with meta-knowledge, but most people don't censor what they do/say near babies, so the SI would probably learn the truth that way.

For their Quirk, I'm thinking on them getting All For One or an evolved version (Can take a Quirk, create a permanent copy and give back? or something along those lines)

I have no idea if they would become a Hero or a Villain, or where this story would go. I would prefer it if AFO at least tried to be a Good Dad. I have some other ideas of this being set in an AU, so the SIs meta-knowledge wouldn't be all that useful, and their reaction to this, especially if this went down the line of some AUs where AFO decides to retire to raise his kids

So, yeah.
If anyone decides to use this idea, please let me know
 
So I finally wrote the first experimental chapter, and I've spelling checked and grammar checked two times, no a lot of times, and while I think it'll be fine, I think I used the words, "look", "looked" and some other words a bit too much, so I kind of hope to find a solution to fix that small problem, I don't really have anyone I know to bounce off ideas or suggestions apart from here, so i had to think from scratch and learn from my previous failures of attempting to write a JoJo SI, and also the Sailor Moon as Caesar Zeppeli one...

Anyways, here the thing.
A Horrid Trek Through Reality : Alternative
Chapter 1 : Everyone's Fanta, I Woke Up On A Shrink Couch and Then I Met Not-Tony-Friggin'-Stark...

Joey immediately woke up and his eyes darted around his room, he noted the AC Bucket was full again and that some bastard was still turning off the AC and promptly went to the bathroom for his morning ritual, looking at his pitiful self with an audible frown.

Mop of black hair that he'd never brushed since he lost those things, Sunken black eyes that'd mirror his freckled dirty face whenever he focused on it, his bruised, dried lips that he could never fix even with plenty of water and crooked teeth that made him look like a gremlin, a short 4'7 gremlin that had stunted growth, ears that was almost deaf because of neglect and failing eyesight that the privilege of being able to see in the middle of the night clearly being loss over time.

He sneered at himself through the mirror and wiped his face with water from the sink faucet.

Going downstairs to tell one of the housekeepers about the AC bucket, he realized when he was downstairs.

Nobody was there, not even his adorable cinnamon roll bear dogs, instead there was unnatural, silence abound.

It was investigation time and he was friggin' scared, it reminded him of that one ARG that was about some woman named Mary and something about her monsters, but screw it, he was a child and circumstances called for a possibly insensitive investigation.



So, the first order of business was to check the windows all over the house to see if someone, something or anything sentient was outside his walled home, and he checked and double-checked to make sure his eyes didn't fail on him. But nothing came out of the window search. Zilch. No dogs, No humans, No Sentient Being and no supernatural or blue box appearing out of nowhere even.

Damn.

So, he opted to move to Plan four-hundred and-cough-second order of business he meant, and it meant he was going to search the rooms downstairs still and the backyard halfheartedly, mostly because it reeked of inhumanely disgusting scents that somehow existed because of humanity and because he could only check by opening the door like Google Street View.

And he did, it began, and ended in Kool Aid Man bursting through the wall and giving him neon Kool Aid.

He was joking of course.

He hated Kool-Aid with passion, and more for Kool Aid Man and neon lighting.

With that he meant Nada Nada mi, there was no one, not even the mysterious hut in the backyard contain the allegedly human disaster housekeepers Jay and Tim.

It was unnerving to find no one In the usually empty but still busy home he lived in, it was starting to get to him, and he didn't like it.

The only things he found around the first floor of the house was some weird orange-y slime in the first-floor bathroom, he spray washed it with the showerhead and some other patches of the same orange-y slime in the backyard too. He water hosed them too. And there was more, in the dog pen, where his four sweet cinnamon roll fluffy dogs lived in.

He didn't know how to deal with that, so he left it alone, for now.

He felt like maybe his step-father…no, his mother wouldn't allow animal experimentation much less Con to do that, it would just rip his already dysfunctional family a new reason to fall apart at the seams and a reason to make his mother's second marriage fail.

He grunted and perished that though immediately and decided to ditch investigation for the second floor, and instead make himself some sugar-free hot cup of cocoa and watch some videos about MLMs.

The absolute silence was getting to him, and he didn't want to become the crazy nutjob of the family because of being left alone for weeks with nothing but canned foods, a microwave and no wi-fi.

Last time it happened, it wasn't very…pretty.

Geh.

He was getting too absorbed in his thoughts too many times this day, so he got himself pumped up with going to the kitchen and humming nonsensical things.

He filled the iron kettle, flicked it on, left it to boil, and began doing the next step of making sugar-free cocoa.

Actually, bothering to do it, he began shoving powdered milk down the 1# Brother mug he stole from the cupboard, filling it halfway and shoving some powdered chocolate over the powdered milk with his skinny hands that reminded him of his grandmother's weak, saggy arms….damn it! He was thinking too much! Focus, Focus!

He grunted as soon as the iron kettle's switch flicked off by itself as a natural mechanism, he grabbed a spoon and shoved it into the mug and mixed the powder before grabbing the iron kettle by the handle and dumping the boiling, hot water into the mug to the brim.

He was careful in mixing in the mug, he didn't want a repeat of the Burning Everything In The Kitchen IncidientTM​.

You know how to cook, she said. Cook anything on the stove, she said!

He was getting annoyed just by remembering that, and ditched remembering it in favour of bringing the hot cocoa upstairs to his bedroom quickly.

Ah, but he couldn't. Why? Because peace, it seems, didn't want to exist for him.

And why didn't peace want to exist for him? His dear to god parents were banging one door over like some raunchy teen-drama neighbors!

He felt that his intervention was very much needed so he could enjoy the wee morning. He wanted to act selfish for once. He was already a doormat at high school, and transferring that to his home didn't bode well for him. He already had a lot to deal with, and thinking about it made the skin of his body, shiver.

And so, he turned around and walked to the last door in the eerie hallway, staring at the odd shrine propped up in the middle of it, and avoiding it thereafter, and arrived in front of the door where he could hear much more clearer.

Now, he wasn't actually very sure if his parents were even banging, because, the sounds coming from the room sounded something or someone falling over again and again and other things breaking and shattering. It sounded someone was getting murdered inside of there.

And it concerned him. It very much made him feel concerned on whatever the hell was going inside there. He crossed his fingers and wished himself luck before turning the door knob and there he saw as he stood there, something straight out of the depths, no, from the very deep depths of hell itself.

The room-, it was burning, everything in sight was falling apart, you name it.

And his parents, oh dear god. They were made and molded into pure, burning nightmare fuel, they were so unrecognizable that the way he only knew they were his parents was because of the clothes they wore, the melting and burning clothes that looked like it melted like candle wax, and he knew that burning didn't work that way.

And the pain, the immense pain, he saw in the eyes of what was left of his parents anymore, it was forever ingrained in his head. And they looked, looked at him.

And the moment they looked at him, they crawled towards him so pitifully.

He could see the inner workings of whatever's left of them, their red beating, heart, their burning intestines that caught on fire, their exposed and melting skulls and brain, their body, the legs, they were turning into orange puddles mixed with blood, and they were approaching him, and he connected the dots.

He was the last one left alive in the house.

A hand grabbed onto one of his legs and he looked down, it was what was left of his mother, holding onto his leg with her scalding hand.

Out of reflex, he ganked her with the cup of cocoa and smashed it on her head.

She screeched an unholy screech that was so loud it would've made him cover his ears, but he didn't.

His ears were already feeling deaf from the moment he entered this unholy room.

He kicked her in the face, and her stomach exploded with acid, practically spilling it over the floor.

She collapsed onto the floor and turned into a puddle of orange slime of stomach acid and hot cocoa.

It wasn't very pretty, and it didn't help that it wasn't, and it crossed the line and finally made him vomit something all over himself, it was blood.

Blood?

He looked at his hands and saw it as the truth sinked in for him, he was dying, and he was going to experience whatever the hell his parents went through, as they were both thoroughly dead and his step-father fell through the window and hit one of the cars his family owned moments earlier, it was ironic.

And he was starting to feel that his legs were numb and wobbling.

He didn't know what to do.

He.

He wasn't prepared, he never was.

And so, he whipped his body around and left the burning room. The house was starting to fall apart from the spreading fire and everything made of wood was making it worse. He was already hearing the blaring sound of ambulances approaching his house and made his way to his room, past the bathroom and grabbed his laptop with his skinny, melting hands and knew it was stupid and selfish of him to grab his laptop and try to go downstairs and save himself, but what else is there to save? Nothing.

He was still alive, and chose to pick up his slack and hugged the laptop and turned to the stairs and went down, he felt he was becoming shorter every minute he wasted and more sick of his life he did it. It was worthless and ultimately reckless to do it. But the only thing he bonded more was his brother, who he never saw since 2 years ago and his half-broken laptop.

He reached the bottom stairs, feeling shorter and burning and saw 2 firefighters bust through the front door right at that moment. He felt relieved, and knew he was saved, and approached them quickly.

He didn't hear what they were saying, but they looked horrified at the sight of him, the same look he had when he had seen what his parents turned into. He didn't care anymore.

But then he realized he could feel his heart beating much clearer than ever in his life and felt one of his ribs melt right there, and his eyes, they were starting to feel uneven.

He still didn't care, he was being escorted, no laid into something white as his laptop was taken away like it was some worthless toy.

IT WAS HIS AnD hIS AlOnE.

He felt one of his eyes fall out of one of his eye sockets as he attempted to reach for it, but he kept being kept down by the doctors like some rabid German Shepard.

nO.

He dIDn'T wAnt tO lOse It.

hE DiDn'T WaNt To LoSE i-

"Sir, Jonathan Manson Hale is DOA."

"Oh. Such a shame to lose a patient like this again, but it looked like he didn't have a chance to survive and function normally after that anyway. Tsk Tsk. And everyone said that the Hale family could live through anything, it seems that tale was highly exaggerated. Ah man, Their third son couldn't even survive the Mitchett Plague, and their older sibling, Christian Yaneza Hale who went missing 2 years ago after the discovery of a cult worshiping Cthulhu and said to be one of the sacrifices by a caught cult member and yadda, yadda, you know the rest of history."

"Not really, but Sir-"

"He was also a shame, he was the best detective in this shit city and probably could have helped us with the Mitchett Plague to be honest, he was like, Batman-Level Detective, without the shit backstory and the Batman crap though…."

"Sir, the deceased patient is evaporating."

"Well shit."

And on June 11th ​, 2020, Jonathan Manson Hale died.

His cause of death was the Mitchett Plague and by way of burning and melting alive.

Nobody knew who caused the fire that day, but some was suspected that their neighbor or one of the former cult members who worshipped Cthulhu caused it.

And so, the Hale Family ended….

…or did it?

===K u p o===

His eyes snapped open as he found himself laying down on something, not melting to death, going insane, losing his beloved laptop to those crummy bitches and breathing fine.

He laid there still on whatever he was laid on before sitting upwards and checking himself, finding that his hands weren't bony or melting, and that he wore clothes he'd never put on before, but he knew where they were from, very well.

A white trench coat that had 2 iconic small golden pins on its greyish collar? Check.

A red and white patterned sweater that was similar to what a familiar memetic man wore? Check.

White winter boots with sloppily tied laces? Check.

He checked the length of his hair and thanked silently whatever benevolent being that did this was spared from his annoying behavior because the state of his body wasn't altered into a female's, but for now, he also noted, that he was sitting on a chair for people with shrinks and shortly realized, Shouldn't I be traumatized because of what happened earlier?

"Oh yes, you should be indeed." Echoed a familiar masculine voice.

He immediately turned his attention to wherever that voice came from and found it was a small speaker attached next to an elaborately detailed wooden door with the Ouroboros symbol on it directly in front of him.

He visibly hesitated and asked knowing it was a stupid question, "Are..you God?"

Inhumane, Screeching laughter came from the speaker.

"God? God? That's just hilarious! It's a deliberate title for things like those of your kind can't understand and stands firmly next to the word Ineffable but for a different reason, Ha!"

His brows furrowed at that, getting a feeling that whoever on the speaker was lying spectacularly, bullshitting or maybe truth by omission. He didn't know, but he wanted to frankly call bullshit.

"..what about the…snake door? is the snake on it going to," he motioned his hands at it. "become alive and, become a shrink magically here? Because it could happen, and I look like I'm in a room where a shrink's gonna appear." He looked at the wooden door with the Ouroboros symbol with suspicion.

Whoever on the speaker was speaking, hesitated at the words spoken and coughed.

"Yes…that, unfortunately I'm no Wizard so, no half-snake shrinks, Lucifer incident last time I tried." Their voice shivered at that.


"But! that door is important, and I encourage you to go through it my c-friend, it will lead to a hallway with an elevator that is waiting for you to arrive, it shall let you go to where I am and there, I await your Presence, Jonathan Manson Hale." Immediately after that, the small speaker began melding into the wall itself like clay.

He had a blank face that could've been mistaken for a child's drawing after an inordinate amount of silence after the speaker melded into the wall.

. . .

He stood up and began punching the shrink chair he was sitting down on as a way to make the innate frustration of being here disappear until his hands became numb whenever he shoved it in ice before this event happened.

After that, he picked up his slack and opened the Ouroboros Door and just like the man on the speaker said, there was a classy hallway with black lanterns on each side of the wall and at the end of it was the ElevatorTM​.

Although the hallway was a little weird due to constant music or more accurately the worping noises of the TARDIS on loop he heard while walking relatively quickly towards the ElevatorTM​, but that didn't matter anymore, he was already in the elevator and realized he would rather take a fish-boat than a nausea-inducing elevator trip.



The general emotions he was feeling about this situation was this was either a secret kidnapping with LSD involved so the victims hallucinates while being kidnapped by the mafia, or he really did experience intense trauma that he repressed very well with a wall to protect his general sanity and everything else before he could go insane.

Oh, he also felt weirdly triumphant for feeling taller than he should be when he stood up and walked into this nauseating elevator. Being proud for having your growth stunted was a weird thing he used to have pride in because most of his family was shorter than him, the middle, middle child, but then high-school obliterated that sense of pride by having most of the students he met there being taller than him.

He was like some Hobbit or something damn it, he hated being the small man!

But for now, he just had a single objective for now, meet whoever was behind the speaker and ask logical questions to get their own curiosity snuffed off temporarily, or if things weren't going to be civil, the alternative option was to try to get back to the Elevator very quickly or stun them to hold them off until he had enough time to call the police and-

Someone began clapping slowly as the Elevator door slid away and he stepped outside to see where he was and, it honestly came out of the left field.

Because he was fairly sure he was in the building where the Avengers are in the films cause' of the immense awesomeness of how it looked.

And because Tony-friggin'-Stark was there too. Sitting on the weird long couch.

How was Tony-friggin'-Stark actually here and how did he recognize he was not Robert Downey Jr. in disguise?

Because damn did he look cooler than Robert Downey Jr. and because of the Arc Reactor, that looked even cooler than the films.

"Damn." He gasped.

"Damn indeed." Tony-friggin'-Stark said with a grin, standing up from the couch and walking over to him with a wave. He was in a friggin' cool suit that he never saw in any of the films.


"Ar-Are you really here, as in here-here, as in the real friggin' Tony-friggin' Stark?!" He asked with amazement.


Tony-friggin' Stark..frowned?



Frowned?



"Nope." Not-Tony-friggin'-Stark said.


Oh.


"I'm the man-manning the speaker, and the one who wants your Presence here, my friend. Now take a seat on the counter and let's talk." Not-Tony-friggin'-Stark grinned wide enough that it didn't belong on their face at all.


Oh, friggin' hell this is probably some…higher evil being thing or something even worse.


He gulped nervously and walked up to bar counter and sat down on it, the feeling of his trench coat engulfing his legs becoming comforting and slightly calming his sense of incoming dread and possibility of ceasing to exist.


Not-Tony-friggin'-Stark clapped their hands. "Since I already know your name, I shall introduce myself as, The Ineffable. It's a simple name that gets straight to the point, much more accurate than the name "Iron Man" for a dubbed "superhero" ." The Ineffable air-quoted with a scoff. He still felt he was being slightly bullshitted here, maybe he should call it Bullshit-Sense.

"Anyhow, the introduction semantics are done. I'm going to give you an Ơ̴̢̜͎̭̞̙͚͓̗̙͛̇͐͒̍̋̀̿͊̓̈́͑̚͘̕͝f̴̡̢̭̹̖̳̱̜̣͕͓̙̳̫̳͉̦͙͇̭͚̗̱͉̼͙͎͕̪̻̲̿̃͂̔̎͜͜ͅf̸̨̨̢̛͕̯̰̹̞͉̮̱̓͂̏̓͋́̀̀͌̑̈́̓̀̑͆͐́͌̇͌̌̕͠͝͝e̸̢̨̝̭̗̜̝̻̝̱̹̺̖͚̩͉̒̌͋̍̋̋̊̑́͋͊͊̒̂̚ͅr̷̡̢̢̙̜̟̰̣̺̣͕͕̻̭͕̫̲͎̦̯̠͖̗͇͙̰͚͖̠̲̠̹͎̳̯͍̟̖̰̭̲̱̋̽̃̏̇̾͐̾̀̎̑̌͆̊́̓̈̎̚͜͝͝͠ͅ , I'll give you a slightly simplified rundown of it, but before that, any questions asked?" It asked.

He hesitated. "Uh, is this like, s-similar to a demon's contract? I heard it kind of exists only myth-wise and thatitalsomightbemadeupbycultists.."

The Ineffable looked very disgusted at the mention of it, pinching the bridge of their nose. "No! The Demon's Contract does exist, but it's absolutely only done or used by the most desperate, pathetic, cowardly and degenerate beings of your kind. I absolutely despise those type of things and more-so the Demons themselves, they're the lowest of the lowest, losing their Grace of Heaven because of.."

It hand waved that off, feeling a headache coming.

"..Never mind. I'm just rambling now, I know you most likely don't have any questions left for now, correct?" It narrowed its eyes at him. He did have many, many questions about its rambling, but decided to focus on the supposedly more important thing to ask.

"Not really, just last, last question, are you like, an…Eldritch Being?" His voice cracked at that, losing his faux-calmness that he had during the whole talk.

"I am indeed an Eldritch Being, the words slide riiight off the tongue, glad you noticed." It's chuckle echoed.

"Though, I'd hate to be mistaken for a meager Demon, hah! I'd wonder if you thought I was a Demon of all things, wonder what might have happened if you did…" It grinded its teeth at that while attempting to smile at him.

"Huh." He deadpanned, having no idea to react to that other than maybe screaming and kicking its shin to escape this thing.

The Ineffable coughs into its hands, the hate for Demons disappearing momentarily. "Returning to the Ơ̴̢̜͎̭̞̙͚͓̗̙͛̇͐͒̍̋̀̿͊̓̈́͑̚͘̕͝f̴̡̢̭̹̖̳̱̜̣͕͓̙̳̫̳͉̦͙͇̭͚̗̱͉̼͙͎͕̪̻̲̿̃͂̔̎͜͜ͅf̸̨̨̢̛͕̯̰̹̞͉̮̱̓͂̏̓͋́̀̀͌̑̈́̓̀̑͆͐́͌̇͌̌̕͠͝͝e̸̢̨̝̭̗̜̝̻̝̱̹̺̖͚̩͉̒̌͋̍̋̋̊̑́͋͊͊̒̂̚ͅr̷̡̢̢̙̜̟̰̣̺̣͕͕̻̭͕̫̲͎̦̯̠͖̗͇͙̰͚͖̠̲̠̹͎̳̯͍̟̖̰̭̲̱̋̽̃̏̇̾͐̾̀̎̑̌͆̊́̓̈̎̚͜͝͝͠ͅ I mentioned earlier, It involves this," It pulled out a rather thick folder out of its suit and placed it on his lap.

He stared at the thick folder with contempt before picking it up from his lap and opening it.

At first sight of the content, he whispered a slight curse. "Friggin' Christ."

But he kept flipping the pages and after a while, after reading it all he stopped looking.

And Joey looked up from the folder and squinted his eyes at The Ineffable with exasperation.


"Damn. Handing me an olive branch here? No catch, Mr. I'm-Ineffable? Because if there is I'm gonna guess as best-case scenario there's a shitty NDA hidden in here or some very weak blackmail."


It opened and closed its mouth and had a very concerned look in its eyes with skewed priorities in tow.

"Are you sure you are a child? Because if you aren't…this is going to be my worst decision in decades so far, and Sherrinford is going to never live this down." It muttered that so quietly, it sounded like some married husband whose wife would gossip and never live whatever happened, down.

"Ha! No." He deadpanned.

"I'm a child. I just kind of…became mature like this, I'm still a little piece of shit still though," It gave an amused look at that, crossing its arm like some mother.

"But back to this…You're handing me an olive branch aren't you?"

"I think you're using the olive branch term here wrong, I don't need peace, I already have peace in my life, Hale." It snapped back at him.


He winced before apologizing.


"Ah shit. Sorry, sorry I'll just…get along with signing this thing," He sighed.


"but I'll double-check it since I can't remember most of it now, my attention span is all over the place sometimes." He muttered and began flipping through and closely reading the thick pages of the folder.



It sighed and gave a pat to the shoulders to him. "I'll accept your weakly formed apology for now, but, I'll give you advice." It clapped it fingers and there appeared, next to where he sat, a fully functional coffee-maker with an already full cup of coffee, it picked it up and sipped, and put it down on the counter, crossing its fingers.

A buzzing sound was starting to close in the building and a door to the balcony opened from outside, and there stood…something.

Instead of a human head, it had impossibly large red bug eyes on a disgusting and drooling wasp head on a human body in a business suit with mantis claws that dripped of drying but recent blood.

And it approached to where he and The Ineffable where currently.

It bowed in front of The Ineffable and squinted its eyes at them, scratching its chin with its sharp mantis claws. "Z-Zatch is the reason you need of Drigger, Benevolent Lord Starkenh?"

"He who hesitates.." Starkenh began with an inhumane smile on his face, staring at Drigger with unhinged glee.

Drigger tilted its wasp head at Starkenh's unhinged glee. "Be-Benevolent Lord Starkenh?"

"..gets crushed into tiny specs of dust!"
"Starken-!" Before it could finish it's warning, it stilled with its widened bug eyes and turned to dust onto the floor with his fleeting life ended with a single snap from Starkenh.
It left nothing but its clothes.
 
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I mean I kinda tried to do a psudeo PF si, then work immediately decided to completely change my schedule and dump overtime on me while laughing at my sleep schedule.

T_T
 
*Rubs hands*

So after a long agonizing week of just being alone and fixing, re-checking and reflecting what's wrong with a thing, I finally did it.
I had so many ideas of what type SI I wanted to do, like the MCU, Batman, Sherlock (With many things removed from my idea of what's canon, because the fourth season was downright stupid and because there's so many things that made me cringe.) and so on. I finally decided and I cleaned it up. sort of. It's 1.9k words or something, oh and I based and fixed some of the things that felt off for me, which that I meant the first chapter thing I posted here.

"F-Friggin' Jesus Christ." Joey cursed and coughed, accidentally inhaling the dust. That is definitely a dick move deliberately disguised as a thinly disguised reference demonstration with full Eight Grade Syndrome in effect with a weird name, like, seriously, who names their child friggin' Starkenh?



I mean, a name like Benedict is a shit name, but at least it sounds better than Starkenh of all things!



Of course, Starkenh was there, who was still standing there, cringing at what they did and nervously coughed.



"I…expected much more hazah and much more firework-y effects and that to be less…dramatic, but an-anyways," He clicked his tongue. "Serious business."



Joey straightened his poor spine.



"…And what is said serious business?" Joey asked with lidded eyes.



"Remember the contract I told you to read?" Starkenh's voice became nervous whisper.



"Yes?" Joey's lips thinned.



"Well that was a load of complete bullshit I gave you."



Joey opened his mouth with a completely blank face that spoke of intense protest.



"I'm sorry, but, ex-fucking-scuse me, how?" His left eyebrow raised to highest heaven as he leaned in.



"Because it was a fake one," Starkenh paused. "for D&D."

"D&D? D&D? This," Joey hysterically smacked the folder in his hands. "Does not look like it belongs in a session for D&D and more like something I would've found in a professional business deal, if it was, it's almost the length of that god forbidden story for Old Man Henderson, god damn it for god sakes!"



Starkenh, quite visibly cringed. "Look, my range of imagination ranges from the size of a shoe to the size of a heaven sent statue of ideas, so It's not my fault."

"Not my fault, my ass. How did this is even happen? How could you mistake something fo-oh." Joey made a face.



"Oh my fucking bloody god, my head's thick, god I hate you, I hate this." He hissed.



Starkenh hummed and raised his eyebrows.


"Know what?" Joey held up his hands and hopped down from the counter, giving a sharp look to the eldritch abomination in front of him.


"Where's the real contract? You must've just misplaced it somewhere like a remote or magazine, right?"



"Well," Starkenh clicked his tongue again. "Sort of, I think."



"You think? You know my opinion of you as the all powerful eldritch abomination is depleting, I'm starting to think you aren't as smart as you presented yourself as."



Starkenh grumbled something unintelligible with an annoyed look and snapped his fingers, looking concentrated.



A few seconds passed and Joey had begun tapping his boots, he was frowning like a pug.



And then something finally appeared, on the counter where Joey's attention went to.



it was a bright, red, box for…Legos.



Joey looked back at the most disappointing person he'd ever encounter, he was wondering why he was feeling hysterical like a piece of shite today, but now he knew, he knew what it was.



"Bloody Legos? " His voice reached a new high pitch with a tone of hysterical accusation bleeding in.


he was beyond tranquil fury already, he was pushed to that point so many times by his own bloody family his anger built up over the years, waiting to break the dam, and this was almost breaking said dam.



"Well yes, Legos. I play and build, with Legos." The most disappointing person pointed to the box of Legos as if it explained everything, and promptly realized something.



"Uh. So this is where the…uh, contract thingy I misplaced. I'm gonna snap it here, ha-ha…" He did as he said, and there it appeared in Joey's hands, where the fake contract got swapped out for.



Joey looked down on his hands and saw that it was a single piece of rubbish paper with cursive letters that he could've swore was Old English for a moment before the letters themselves came to bloody life and moved around the paper and even danced around his own hands.


They were beautiful to watch, to watch them twist, turn and rip apart into new letters. it made his hands tingle with tiny happiness that made his anger dwindle enough that he didn't feel like strangling Mr. Disappointment.



And so the letters formed into actual words he could understand, which were simple enough, but it was actually handwritten quite beautifully, although he felt like he wanted run away from it weirdly enough.



He looked up from the translated contract and narrowed his eyes once he read it in silence and as Mr. Disappointment sat on the counter-chair, or whatever it was called.



He cleared his throat. "This is surprisingly better than the D&D contract, It's a bit wonky, but it did make me, the embodiment of sloth, motivated, so," He shrugged and reached his hand out to Starkenh.

"We're signing it."

Starkenh looked confused for a moment and made an 'o' face before he snapped his fingers.



And there something appeared simultaneously as he did that, they were floating in the air, it was an old-fashioned ink pen and a too-familiar plain looking ballpoint pen that had small, stripped paper swirling around it.



Joey held his breath in as he took the floating ballpoint pen with a reverent look in his eyes, the same time Starkenh did, who was looking strangely uncomfortable at that, and plucked the contract from Joey's hands.



There, Joey snapped out of revering his pen like some cultist and sputtered awkwardly.



Starkenh rolled his eyes and signed the contract with his apparently infinitely inked pen, whatever he wrote there, it vaguely resembled what Joey could compare to a doctor's writing, or more actually what the equivalent of dog shit.



Joey felt vaguely sorry and signed the bottom of the contract next to Starkenh's signature, beginning with the letters "Ja" in cursive. Huh. That was strange. Bugger.



He mentally shrugged and overwrote the a for an o and signed it completely, it was pretty to look at for one, and made his ribs feel like they were puncturing holes in his lungs when he glanced at his pen from high school.



He shook his head and glanced at grumpy Starkenh. He sighed and snapped the contract to dust.



Starkenh clapped. "Right, we're done with the contract and so, how do you wanna get kicked out?"



Joey pursed his lips with a confused shiver. "What?"



Oh great, it's a Repeater. "Literally, I'm saying how do you want to get kicked out? I could throw you into a Tipler Cylinder or a pity portal if you said so." Though no time machines, I hate those.



Joey had a thoughtful look on his face. "..I have no idea what any of those are, but the way…"



He made a duck face. "I'm gonna make an assumption that you'll twist anything I suggest with the intention of making me suffer," Starkenh genuinely winced. "And so I pick the Tipler-Cylinder and to somewhere random, random is better." Although I'm fairly sure I heard that somewhere.



Starkenh looked somber with his hollow grin. "Well, congratulations." You've joined the club.



He snapped his fingers one last time and the whole building began collapsing at an cellular level, almost everything was being ripped away rapidly to reveal the most beautiful thing Joey had ever seen in his life, but he couldn't look at the most incredible thing anymore.



Because he was thrown forcefully into the strange, blue hole that came with the most brilliant thing he saw, and he swore he knew he saw it somewhere.



The last thing he saw was two vague humanoids appearing next to Starkenh.

===

The first thing Joey registered when he came into consciousness was pain.



He couldn't describe what was causing it, but he was in pain, the worst pain he ever felt that it topped going to the dentist, and he remembered that visit too well.



He was vaguely aware of his surroundings, his vision was unnervingly blurry for him and he couldn't focus very much on that either, there were sounds of someone or something, it was hurting his ears and his vision was ebbing away.



The pain made him scream so much until he passed out on the cold, cold, ground.

===

His eyes slowly opened up, he was half-awake, and his legs felt numb.


"Yeuuuuuu." His numb jaw was working correctly, but it had that shite feeling like everything else in his body, his voice was concerning him though. It was rough and deep sounding.


Hm.

He looked around his surroundings.


It seemed like he was in a hospital judging on how shite the funky hospital smell is and he was in a white room with boring things. he looked down on his…body.



Huh.



It's been a long time since he'd seen himself in a hospital gown, and the since was when he was four and when the motorcycle incident happened.



But this was a bit too funky for his head. It was like the mirror floor-thing again, but his head was just tall.



And his hands, oh wow. They weren't unhealthily pale anymore. They looked fine for once in his life, They didn't look like shite from the lack of sun, but they were think as sticks still.



Well, that made his eyes watery.



"Hello?" He looked up and saw the door open, there was a short startled woman who had a tray of food and a cup of water.



"Yeuss?" Dear lord his voice was still slurred.



Her expression was unreadable as she walked to him and sat the tray down on the grey table next to where he was laying down. Oh right. He should probably sit up and not be a lazy-ass.



So he did.



And he couldn't.



His spine felt like it wanted to snap in half, so, he gave up and stared at the short woman out of pettiness and the energy of "Feed me you pathetic human being" with all he could muster, hoping his face was menacing enough for her.



The short ginger-haired woman was unnerved at this, unbeknownst to Joey.



She predictably backed away and left the room with a silent click of the door, leaving the room disturbingly quiet that made him remember the quiet beats in his head before shaking that off.



Joey sighed and bit on lips. He was feeling quite funky and very wrong, but at least his internal organs were more or less and his heart was..surprisingly not about to have a heart attack. (even though it was a week ago, he never wanted to experience that again. He couldn't sleep until it was five-AM)



He sighed again made his numb hand reach out to a pillow anywhere on the bed and grabbed something fluffy and it was a heart-aching dark-floral patterned pillow, but it was just colder than even his AC's temp.



He didn't dwell on that anymore and held it close to his chest and hugged it for non-existent warmth.



So far, the only things he knew was that he was utterly alone here, he had changed biologically, everything was still numb but painful, he didn't know where he was and lastly he was quite hungry for food more or less.



He would've been amused and eating bread crumbs in any other situation, but it wasn't the situation time for that, so he was stumped to do anything except touch the food tray because he couldn't reach it.



He also couldn't contact anyone to come to his room because he hadn't been in a hospital since a long time ago, so he decided to snuggle his face into the pillow and stubbornly wait for someone to arrive and do something. He couldn't do shite anyways.



It was pointless.



He allowed himself some leeway to weep. His eyes felt even more prickly.



His head was fuzzy and fizzy, he could remember his previous encounter very well though, but not the…tippy-silly-something. That probably had to do something with what he signed in the contract.

(He mentally changed that disgusting name to Ian. Starkenh looked like an Ian anyways.)
 
I had a ridiculous idea, and the title of the fic explains the premise:

Lord Kallig's Three Personalities (Tanya, Bakarina, and I)
 
I've got two ideas. The first is reincarnation into MHA with the quirk TK. The range is nebulous, and the weight limit is what I can lift in one hand. The 'evolution' is really just realizing that my quirk doesn't care about total weight, just the weight of what I am directly manipulating. This would let me pick up my shoes while I'm in them and fly around. Would probably try to go for Best Jeanist after the sports festival, and try to get flight lessons from Nejire-Chan.

The second one is a Digimon/ Fairy Tail cross where I am dropped in near Porlyuscha's house with a D-tector, right around when Natsu and the rest joined. Because of where I dropped in I find Arbormon pretty quickly and go around looking for the rest of the spirits and having wacky misadventures with the guild. There would probably be more Digimon bleed over, but it wouldn't really be much of an issue cause Fiore already has superpowered animals.
 
i had some ideas twirling around in my head but my motivation is too low to write anything cohesive...
DCU (note that all my knowledge comes from YJ, injustice, and fantiction..):
  • blue lantern!SI with a chronic disease. they're only kept alive by their ring and are looking to find a green lantern so they can access their ring's healing powers and cure themself, but they're just really really unlucky and forgetful and they either just miss a GL or the GL leaves before oc can do anything. personality is shy and nervous and somewhat airheaded, but also pretty endearing. oc struggles w/ SH and is v irresponsible (and often ends up not sleeping or eating for days as a result).
  • SI with a twist: oc comes from a dimension that knowingly records the happening of other dimensions. they keep track of all the timelines and dimensions that continue to branch off. oc is just v concerned about exactly which universe they're in—they really don't want to be there if injustice happens—and is v aware that they have to leave very soon because just them being there could be creating new dimensions and timelines and they'll be in so much trouble if they get home. oc has a no-bullshit personality, and is v blunt and insensitive. they're completely focused on getting the hell out of dodge and don't care about answering questions which just creates amusing confusion and concerning paranoia. they're basically just a force of nature. think number 5 from the umbrella academy.
NARUTO
  • SI as haku. they're v go with the flow and lighthearted and they're mostly focused on making sure that zabuza doesn't die, and shipping him with mei. they're also shameless about compliments and is attracted to basically everyone bc everyone is attractive. when shit goes down, tho, they can be very cold and calculating. they don't like the shinobi lifestyle due to lingering morals from their past life, and would much rather run an orphanage/foster home. they also want to reboot the system for the orphans out there bc kids deserve better.
  • SI as sasuke. he just wants to keep his eyes in his head and continuously avoids all his problems. he's weirdly self-destructive and most of his plans are kamikaze style bc hey he's died before what's another time? everyone is very concerned. he just wants people to fuck off and go slap his brother bc really there had to be a better plan than just traumatizing sasuke by murdering literally everyone and then trying to commit suicide via baby brother. kisame and sasuke are def bros.
 
Rule 2: Don’t Be Hateful: The use of 'retarded' in this context is using it as an ableist slur and thus unacceptable on this forum.
Krazyfan1 said:
Ah, but would the SI know that?

they could have cured themselves this entire time, if they would have waited and looked up what their ring could do...
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
If they weren't completely retarded they would try.
 
Navi-Hank said:
If they weren't completely retarded they would try.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
lol, unfortunately when i made oc i had a forgetful young billy batson-esque kid in mind. think a 5-6th grader, which would be ~11 years old. it's not that they're stupid, per se, but they're very VERY easily sidetracked and their sense of self preservation is skewed. sorta like they subconsciously think they're invincible so they kind of just forget about it. idk if i'm making sense but yeah.
and oc's knowledge is kinda vague, like they know that green + blue = POWER and healing but they don't know how exactly that works. and their anxiety gets in the way of actually asking or doing anything so it just an awkward process lol
 
okay, so i just had a strange idea that is *kinda* self-insert-y but idk. it's a twist.
fandom doesnt particularly matter, but i thought about a d&d character, in, say, dc. imagine a dwarf swearing at everyone, or a well meaning half-orc barbarian with anxiety consistently being attacked by heroes because of all the humans screaming and staring when they see him, triggering an anxiety attack which triggers his rage and then it's just a whole unyielding cycle that just keeps happening because half-orc is just really confused and wants to go back to chilling in his cave.
or a dwarf in dc being fascinated by the advanced tech and proceeding to add magic to them and now everyone is confused because the computer is sentient now??
or maybe a gay disaster warlock showing up at every single battle to check out the fighters bc they're all just rlly attractive. and maybe they eventually use magic to help out and when people ask what he is and where his power comes from he panics and says "magic sugar baby" and now hes known as the superhero "magic sugar" and he's mortified bc they have *tv recordings* now
or maybe a smart tiefling rogue quickly figuring out that the common languages and races don't exist and trying to keep their head down but they keep inadvertently getting into cape shenanigans and eventually they meet a green lantern and accidentally speak infernal and being horrified when the green lantern speaks *back* (bc universal translator)
or maybe someone summons a druid genasi and they're just confused because apparently they have a cult now?? and people think he's a god?? and when he uses wild shape they're disproportionately impressed and think it's more proof that he's a god?? and he just wants a nap and some weed, dammit
 
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