The problem is that they want the MC to be a "chad" or an "alpha" male. B*tch if I try that in real life I'll get slapped or get accused of mysogyny or harassment. They say they "hate" Harems and then write their own harem story, with claims of "making it better", which replaces it with their OC/SI that is more "badass" than the original.
All I want of most Harem MCs is to ask the girl (or boy) they like out. So many stories ruined with "eternal harem" syndrome, where the MC is either dumb as a rock and never notices anything romantic, or has some contrived reason to string everyone along. Sword Art Online was especially vexing since it went from a cute "boy meets girl in deathgame, they come together and win the day" story to a fucking harem setting.
I don't want chads or alpha males, just protagonists who pursue romance someway.
Hmmm, while I understand what you mean, and I agree that some people need to chill with their complaining, usually when I see these complaints is on stories when the heroine makes very, very clear that she's into the MC. So I can get the frustration of some people, stories that dance around the issue of if the main couple will actually end dating or not are quite old by this point.
And "making a move" can be as simple as asking her out on a date or flirt, there's absolutely no need for it to be something extreme.
This.
And that underscores how problematic it is the other 99% of the time.
The spear wielder is a generic spear wielder who could be replaced by any spear wielder because the spear is the most relevant feature at that moment.
The blond is a generic blond who could be replaced by any other blond because being blond is the most relevant feature at that moment.
What does it mean when they get referred to as "the blond" 5 times in one paragraph?
Or 500 times in a chapter?
It takes a character, with all of their character traits, then reduces them down to one trait.
In the moment an unknown guy appears to join a fight, they are "the spear wielder" or "the blond guy". That's how characters refer to them in their head since they don't know their name. Once they know their name, that changes. Usually. Some might, for reasons of their own, still refer to someone as "the barbarian/peasant/blonde" in their head even though they use their name in conversation.
Also, with regards to age gap, I really wonder how people don't understand the difference between adults and minors. The reason Hermione/Snape pairings are usually problematic in a story isn't the age gap per se, but that (usually) Snape is the teacher/authority figure and Hermione is the minor and student. If both are adults and not teacher/student, and there's no similar power gap, there's absolutely nothing wrong with two consenting adults pursuing a relationship despite the age gap. People have agency, folks, and if they like older partners or one specific older partner, that's OK. Certainly in settings where people live easily over a century. An adult Hermione isn't some poor innocent child who couldn't possibly be the equal to Snape in a relationship - she's easily his equal intellectually and has, as one of the heroes of the war, likely more power than he has.
(That said, I despise the pairing because Snape's a fucked-up bullying bigoted asshole who wouldn't recognise a non-toxic relationship if it hit him on the head.)
