Guiche pulled a face. "No! I already had your cousin throwing herself at me today, thank you, and… Tabitha, you scare me. Even if I didn't have my… thing with Monmon, you're not a girl I'd go for. I'm just… I don't think enough people have been nice to you in your life, so I'm trying to be… nice. That's all."

so much maturity and good ideas, Guiche grew up into a reasonable hero!

Magdalene looked up and paled. "Aunt Karina?" she asked the figure wrapped up in warm furs. A hint of pink hair poked out from under the hood. "What are you doing here?"

that moment would cause untold years of nightmares for every Monster that survives said moment.

"Eleanore had quite an interesting tale when she arrived at my doorstep with poor Françoise-Athenais' soulless body in tow," Karina said, her attitude that of an older relative congratulating a new mother. "A tale of dark gods and possession and other such things. Not to mention quite a guilty confession about how she was nearly corrupted herself. I thought I'd just stop by and see if you had anything you'd want to add to that."

Magdalene swallowed. She began to spin her tale. And if there was one thing she was very glad of, it was that Aunt Karina was not a de la Vallière of the main branch by blood. It made everything so much easier.

trapped in front of the Heavy Wind, Archdevils would break down in bloody tears at ths point :D
What are the odds for Magdalene to make her "Bluff"-throw? Karina is VERY expirienced with liars and decivers, can't be an easy risk.

... I am sincerely surprised that Isabella is honestly trying to be a good person in this. I thought she was just pretending. I didn't realise she was actually trying very hard to be Good without quite understanding how.

makes one wonder just how twisted the concept of "Good", "Nice" or "Sane" has become.
If Guiche becomes a Teacher, bringing some minimal common sense to Royals and Nobles, he'd be the next great Saint.
 
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makes one wonder just how twisted the concept of "Good", "Nice" or "Sane" has become.
If Guiche becomes a Teacher, bringing some minimal common sense to Royals and Nobles, he'd be the next great Saint

There needs to be a book. Maybe Guiche can write it with Tabitha's help. "Absolute Basics of Being Good". Or "Introducing How to be Good for the Ethically Challenged". With maybe a chapter for "Good Methods of Courtship, and Ethical Responses to Heartbreak". And probably an encouraging note at the front that being Good may be difficult, but one should keep trying anyway. Also that fighting against the forces of the Abyss is certainly a good start at being Good, but certainly not the entirety of it. I believe many rulers and heroes could use that helpful reminder/clarification. (Would not be surprised if people in this world thought that fighting against Abyss was enough to qualify for Goodness)

It should also probably outline that a primary quality of being Good is wanting to help others rather than oneself. Having selfish desires is not evil, but harming others due to selfish desires usually is.

... I wanna write a small handbook for the ethically challenged now and see how hilariously it ends up being misinterpreted.
 
Ya know, having just binge read both this and the previous thread over the course of two days, upon reading all the commentary of how surpised people are that X character seems so mature and not a terrible flat caricature, I'm soooo happy I've never watched ZnT. Now I can just appreciate an awesomely written, hilarious, clever story without the baggage. Yaaaaaaay!
 
Ya know, having just binge read both this and the previous thread over the course of two days, upon reading all the commentary of how surpised people are that X character seems so mature and not a terrible flat caricature, I'm soooo happy I've never watched ZnT. Now I can just appreciate an awesomely written, hilarious, clever story without the baggage. Yaaaaaaay!

I think the novels were better in that point.

There needs to be a book. Maybe Guiche can write it with Tabitha's help. "Absolute Basics of Being Good". Or "Introducing How to be Good for the Ethically Challenged". With maybe a chapter for "Good Methods of Courtship, and Ethical Responses to Heartbreak". And probably an encouraging note at the front that being Good may be difficult, but one should keep trying anyway. Also that fighting against the forces of the Abyss is certainly a good start at being Good, but certainly not the entirety of it. I believe many rulers and heroes could use that helpful reminder/clarification. (Would not be surprised if people in this world thought that fighting against Abyss was enough to qualify for Goodness)

It should also probably outline that a primary quality of being Good is wanting to help others rather than oneself. Having selfish desires is not evil, but harming others due to selfish desires usually is.

... I wanna write a small handbook for the ethically challenged now and see how hilariously it ends up being misinterpreted.

that would be an idea for an Omake, I LIKE!
Are you familiar with "Avoiding Stupid Deaths in the 41st Millenium (40k Humor)" ? I'm thinking that format, a rule/guideline followed by an example

as for the title, maybe:
"Guiche's Checklist, 500 acts of overcoming evil Dating"

I'd start it like this:

Prologe
Over the years I have encountered and learned of many grotesque, evil and plain stupid situations.
Par of the course for a active Hero, but what really disturbed me was how many people acted in an evil way only because nobody informend them of alternatives.
moreso despite being actually intelligent and well-meaning some couldn't even believe there better options.
After being the target of such poor souls for more than one occasion, I decided to write this book in the hope it will help the missguided.

-Guiche the Bronze

(What would Tabitha write in the introduction?)
 
I think the novels were better in that point.



that would be an idea for an Omake, I LIKE!
Are you familiar with "Avoiding Stupid Deaths in the 41st Millenium (40k Humor)" ? I'm thinking that format, a rule/guideline followed by an example

as for the title, maybe:
"Guiche's Checklist, 500 acts of overcoming evil Dating"

I'd start it like this:

Prologe
Over the years I have encountered and learned of many grotesque, evil and plain stupid situations.
Par of the course for a active Hero, but what really disturbed me was how many people acted in an evil way only because nobody informend them of alternatives.
moreso despite being actually intelligent and well-meaning some couldn't even believe there better options.
After being the target of such poor souls for more than one occasion, I decided to write this book in the hope it will help the missguided.

-Guiche the Bronze

(What would Tabitha write in the introduction?)

Disclaimer: Good acts may not necessarily bring happiness. Others may misinterpret Good acts. Author is not responsible for misapplications of Good acts and mindsets espoused in this book. Those who blame author and attempt to seek revenge shall lose limb and occasionally living privileges. Please enjoy this book. It is very informative.
 
Disclaimer: Good acts may not necessarily bring happiness. Others may misinterpret Good acts. Author is not responsible for misapplications of Good acts and mindsets espoused in this book. Those who blame author and attempt to seek revenge shall lose limb and occasionally living privileges. Please enjoy this book. It is very informative.

Perfect!

here some points for the book:
(Italic text is Tabitha)

1. Kidnapping the Maiden (or Pretty Boy) for marriage does NOT work out.
Its probably the most classic scenario, the you see someone and have to have her/him. So the target is grabbed and thrown into a small room in the highest tower you have and ordered to marry you.
This is not how a meaningful and lasting relationship begins. Very few people fall in love with their kidnappers and even if they agree to marriage, they WILL make you life as miserable as they can.
A much better start is to beginn a conversation with the target of your attention.
Introduce yourself, ask her/his name, talk about harmless, meaningless topics (weather, home, local politics)
The point of this is to get to known them, a pretty face doesn't always equals a pretty heart. If you are serious about Marriage you would want to marry someone you actually like as a person.

1b.
The steps in point 1 are also valid for making friends.


2. Second meeting
Now that you have made contact, had a nice talk and they agreed to meet you again, EXCELLENT! (Unless they turned out to be unbearable, in that case you politely thank them for the conversation and "have to go now.")
So invite them to dinner (make sure the food is not evil, laced with poison or drugged), nothing to fancy but enough to show you care.
Again: talk, this time about the recommended topics are yourself (don't overdo) and them. Learn as much as you can from your potential spouse. About their parents, childhood and future goals. (if a topics seems painful to them change topics)
 
Be aware that painful topics may not be helpfully signalled, such as with the recipient stating "this is a painful topic", "ow ow ow", "aaargh", or any variant thereof. Instead, painful or boring topics are generally signalled by long silence, or attempt to change the topic. Or long silence followed by attempt to change the topic. If your conversation partner attempts to change topics, allow them to do so.

Similarly, if your conversation partner says things that distress or anger you, it is Good to allow them the benefit of the doubt and assume they were not actually intending to upset you. Appropriate responses include
A) Changing the topic yourself
B) Stating clearly that their words have upset you, and if possible, why it was upsetting to you.
Inappropriate responses include all manner of physical harm, imprisonment, blackmail, coercion or threats. None of these are appropriate responses to words, no matter how hurtful the words are.

Addendum: If you are aware that you are ethically challenged, the best way to not be Evil is to find someone easy at being Good, and consult them whenever you wish to perform physical harm, imprisonment, coercion, blackmail, etc. They will be better able to decide if such forceful actions are an appropriate response.

Do not kidnap or imprison your Good consultant, and do not torture or otherwise coerce them into telling you that forceful responses are appropriate for a situation. Do not torture, imprison, coerce, or threaten their loved ones either.
 
Do not kidnap or imprison your Good consultant, and do not torture or otherwise coerce them into telling you that forceful responses are appropriate for a situation. Do not torture, imprison, coerce, or threaten their loved ones either.
And please no kidnapping of random orphan kids or puppies, then threatening to kill them in front of Consultant if they do not agree with you.

Please go to chapters "Matters of Trust and Loyalty", "Letter versus Spirit of Contract" and "What are so called Common sense and Empathy? Is it something you eat?".

sidenote by random villain:
Most of book is trash, but I would still recommend it to some of my colleagues. Explanation of some concepts like Empathy really do help you in making actually useful,
working predictions on how those illogical heroes will behave or train infiltrators before sending them into rare strongholds of Good enabling them to survive for years, among examples.
 
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Despite being a book by a Hero for sake of teaching those inept at being Good to be Good, the book tops the Los Diablos Times' bestseller list for ages. With critics giving universal low praise for the patience of the author and the clear organization of the material.

It has even garnered some celebrity readers, with the Overlady of the North being spotted with the book at a cafe. However she refused to comment on our reporters' questions and said reporters were beaten and robbed by Minions.
 
trapped in front of the Heavy Wind, Archdevils would break down in bloody tears at ths point :D
What are the odds for Magdalene to make her "Bluff"-throw? Karina is VERY expirienced with liars and decivers, can't be an easy risk.
I have a feeling that the Duke typically dealt with their enemies' psychological attacks so Karin could focus on physical threats. Magdalene should be fine as long as she doesn't contradict anything Karin already knows. Which probably means not bringing up any collaboration with the Overlady of the North unless Karin specifically asks. And being careful to refer to her friends as a "book club" rather than a "cult".

Ya know, having just binge read both this and the previous thread over the course of two days, upon reading all the commentary of how surpised people are that X character seems so mature and not a terrible flat caricature, I'm soooo happy I've never watched ZnT. Now I can just appreciate an awesomely written, hilarious, clever story without the baggage. Yaaaaaaay!
Honestly, Guiche does mature fairly well in the anime. The only really stupid thing I remember him doing after the duel is when he has Verdandi dig a tunnel so the Knights of Undine can spy on the girls' bath. The only character flaw he really keeps throughout the series is being a gigantic flirt, but he and Montmorency remain an item for pretty much the rest of the series.

Saito is the real dumpster fire, which is probably why he's in so few fanfics. And to be honest, even he improves marginally in the anime. (He improves substantially in the novels, but they cover more time and he started worse.)
 
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Yeah, the more I hear about the dude, the more I'm put off. To the point where if I see he's in the fic (even as a bash character), I pretty much immediately stop reading.

Honestly, everything I've ever seen or heard about ZnT tells me that Saito and Louise are a perfect couple because they're both awful, awful people who should never be inflicted on anybody else. And while apparently they do grow and develop, I'm bewildered as to why I should care (which is why I never watched the second season of the anime or beyond--"I Don't Care What Happens To These People" was in full effect).

Though weirdly, ZnT seems to produce a lot of very enjoyable crossover fanfiction (such as, y'know, the story we're reading right here in this thread). This confuses me, because not only do I not really like ZnT, I also am not generally fond of crossovers. :confused:
 
Though weirdly, ZnT seems to produce a lot of very enjoyable crossover fanfiction (such as, y'know, the story we're reading right here in this thread). This confuses me, because not only do I not really like ZnT, I also am not generally fond of crossovers. :confused:
ZnT is like Ranma 1/2, Sailor Moon, and Ah! Megami-Sama - it just works better when you're meshing it with something compatible (or contrasting it with something similar), rather than on its own. There are still good pure ZnT fics like Boiling Blood, though, they're just overshadowed when compared with, say, Making Magick, Summoning the Sun, and Zero Art Online.
 
ZnT is like Ranma 1/2, Sailor Moon, and Ah! Megami-Sama - it just works better when you're meshing it with something compatible (or contrasting it with something similar), rather than on its own. There are still good pure ZnT fics like Boiling Blood, though, they're just overshadowed when compared with, say, Making Magick, Summoning the Sun, and Zero Art Online.
Hey! You take that back!
(mostly j/k)
 
The question is whether Hellish food is evil/sinful (Gluttony is a sin) by definition, or if that's only true of the high calorie stuff like the double beef hellburgers and ice scream.

Guess "Evil" in food is not clearly defined. I was thinking of the Gorilla Brains in the second Indiana Jones Movie.
maybe I replace "evil" with "alive" ?
 
Guess "Evil" in food is not clearly defined. I was thinking of the Gorilla Brains in the second Indiana Jones Movie.
maybe I replace "evil" with "alive" ?

You won't find any places that serve zombie steaks in Los Diablos anymore. Apart from that one restaurant that specializes in minion cuisine (It's a mystery how they haven't gone out of business yet, given that most of their clientele have a tendency to loot the place, maim the waiters if their food takes too long, and never pay for their meals)

Louise is really glad she can afford actual food nowadays.
 
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"Mmm. She might. She's smarter than she acts. But, Founder, you couldn't pay me to be part of your family, even if it'd make me a prince. I gave your cousin some advice about being good and how to meet boys and how kidnapping them and dragging them to your bedroom isn't how it's meant to be done. It came as a genuine surprise to her, can you believe?"

Tabitha blinked. "Wait. Zat eez not how eet is done?"

"... and apparently you also need that talk.
I can't help but be curious regarding what Tabitha thinks is the fastest way to a man's heart.
 
It's basically treason, don't you know? I am the king! I deserve respect! And demand it!"
The scary thing here is, any random person hearing this would think that King Joseph is another Joffrey. This is a classic Joffrey quote. The difference is, Joffrey was a a stupid psychopath with a lot of power, and Joseph is a smart psychopath with a lot more power.
You need to find me my special hat, for one."
The pope hat, of course! Since he already controls Albion, Romalia is next on the list!
Clearly there were traditions here in Gallia he didn't understand.
Oh, everybody knows Gallian traditions are the worst. Everybody remembers what a mess the Salic law made of Europe.
weight things in her favour
weigh.
After she cried into my shoulder and talked about how bad her school had been and… well, I talked to her and she said I was her best friend and the only person who didn't want something from her."
It's been mentioned before, but I do want to say how impressed I am with Guiche here. He really is a Good guy, in every sense of the phrase, and I am highly impressed that his integrity and honesty have gotten him through this unharmed. The way he then offers sympathy and care to Tabitha is just the icing on the cake. I really hope Tabitha had a great time at his house.
"Though I can't help but think there was something we were supposed to do. Something I'm forgetting."
I really am sad we didn't get to see Magdalene, Tabitha and Guiche interact. Then again, we got Karina instead, even if only for a short scene, so I am very satisfied.
What are the odds for Magdalene to make her "Bluff"-throw? Karina is VERY expirienced with liars and decivers, can't be an easy risk.
As was said, I don't think Karina is actually that experienced in these matters. She's the overwhelming force, the kind of hero to crush everything in her path. Oh, she's not stupid, but I doubt she consistently interrogates and tries to figure out the evil plans going on - when she was young she had Centurion for that (and he had tons of experience from the way he grew up), and once she made her reputation, probably every villain would rather flee or confess everything than try and deceive her. And Magdalene has experience with Eleanore, and is very clever. I think at most Karin would suspect there are some things Magdalene isn't telling her, or that something is fishy here, but not enough to be actually suspicious of Magdalene.
Something to remember, by the way, is that Magdalene and her book club were in the midst of preforming Good acts when it all went down. They were hanging up holy symbols and Silver Pentacle decorations, had orphanages singing carols and so forth... and they hid in a church, in holy ground, and Magdalene offered Baelogji holy water and everything. I think Karina is coming to Magdalene because she knows she was in the thick of it, knows Magdalene was once a hero and so had experience and can share information with her.

Now the only question reaming is who's going to be the protagonist of the last heroic interlude. Monmon? Or will it suddenly turn into a villainous interlude and we'll get some Tiffania, or maybe even Lee? Also, what achievement will we unlock from all this?
 
The pope hat, of course! Since he already controls Albion, Romalia is next on the list!
I'm doubtful it's the pope hat, or any actual hat. As someone else said earlier, it's probably the Helm of the Overlord. And if it is, then Louise turning up in Albion is going to make Joseph concerned and possibly send Tabitha to go help with the retrieval and she may just drag along the heroic party. I mean it's been awhile since Louise has gotten any fancy new equipment and the last artifact she found, she couldn't use. Plus there is also the next gem that is bound to be in Albion.
 
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