Jeanne d'Arc: The Hundred-Years Waifu War

Which design is more embarrassing? Cast your votes now.

On the one hand, Zero!Gilles has that ridiculous collar thing, eyes that belong on a fish/chameleon, and there may or may not be something physically wrong with him.

Then there's the other guy who has a skin pigmentation that I'm pretty sure doesn't exist, that ridiculous hairstyle, and has to look so evil right off the bat that I can't help but feel he's not going to go the path of the villain.

So I'm going to go with the latter.
 
Roger's memories of his time in Vorkuta are resurfacing.

Vorkuta - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Vorkuta (Russian: Воркута́; Komi: Вӧркута, Vörkuta; Nenets for place teems with bears)[8] is a coal-mining town in the Komi Republic, Russia, situated just north of the Arctic Circle in the Pechora coal basin at the Usa River

RUSSIA
TOTALLY NOT A REAPER EXPERIMENT
BLACK MAGICS AND DEMONS

Rasputin comes to mind

Caster Gilles has the excuse of being Batshit Insane
 
Vorkuta - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Vorkuta (Russian: Воркута́; Komi: Вӧркута, Vörkuta; Nenets for place teems with bears)[8] is a coal-mining town in the Komi Republic, Russia, situated just north of the Arctic Circle in the Pechora coal basin at the Usa River

RUSSIA
TOTALLY NOT A REAPER EXPERIMENT
BLACK MAGICS AND DEMONS

Rasputin comes to mind

Caster Gilles has the excuse of being Batshit Insane
I was just making a BlOps joke.
 
Why, this Gilles de Rais chap seems like a lovely fellow! He's almost as trustworthy as the Duke of Bedford, the salt of the earth!
 
Let's just say Gilles is fairly important to the story.

Also, nothing comes close to how ridiculous Zero!Gilles looks.
 
...So according to this game. The English had literal orcs in their arm. Small french peasant Women where basically Khorne champions in the making, and the noblemen looked like that one youtube let's player who post's like 5 things a day.
 
Gotta go with Captain Hair for sillier design. Fate!Gilles would actually look decently intimidating in that artwork if he had normal eyes, even with his weird frilly boa.

And of fucking course it was Gilles. I'd say I called it, but there was no break in between introducing him and confirming his identity.
 
When I first saw Gilles, I think I suspected it was him. I mean I knew Gilles was in the game, and I knew he was a spear-user, but I didn't know it was him. The minutes between his introduction and the reveal were the tensest thing in existence. And the sound I made when he introduced himself? I don't know how to describe it, exactly. Something like "ohhhhhhhhh".
 
Just to reinterate, this game goes full anime on the history. The enjoyable kind.
 
When I first saw Gilles, I think I suspected it was him. I mean I knew Gilles was in the game, and I knew he was a spear-user, but I didn't know it was him. The minutes between his introduction and the reveal were the tensest thing in existence. And the sound I made when he introduced himself? I don't know how to describe it, exactly. Something like "ohhhhhhhhh".

Quickly, Zerban has begun to be transformed.

He needs to be quarantined and kept away from books before he starts his search for the Ultimate COOOOOOOL.
 
Jesus Khorne how many one-note sidekicks is this game going to throw at you? It feels like you get at least two new party members every other update.
 
Also Afros in Hundred Years War France what the fuck
Pffft, and? Bladestorm had a samurai and an Indian lady branded as a witch...for uhh...reasons. Racist reasons.



Speaking on the subject, Gilles also crops up there too. I think his design is easily the most sane of the three:


But yeah, this game's portrayal is certainly the most shameful.


Now look here you bloody rotter, I do hope this isn't going to become a recurring theme, because as a proud Englishman, it will make this thread very awkward reading indeed.
 
Can someone tell me why Gilles' depiction here is 'shameful' again? It's just typical anime exaggeration in my eyes.
 
Jesus Khorne how many one-note sidekicks is this game going to throw at you? It feels like you get at least two new party members every other update.

Well it is a Fire Emblem clone.

Your normally meant to get a fair few of them killed off over the course of the story.

Except you know, as Zerban pointed out they don't do that here.
 


"Well, yes! I happen to think it's cute."
"You should only have a cool animal as a pet. Like a wolf or a raven or something."
"Cuissses"... Thighs, she named that fucking thing Thighs! Why would someone gives such a stupid name!

...oh god I got it, "Cuisses de grenouille" -> frog legs. Seriously. :facepalm:

Well thinking about it, that's actually clever, although that reveal that Liane probably sees their mascot as a walking emergency food ration, I wonder if Cuisses realized it.



Don't talk like that. Think of what the English did."
"Jeanne I-I do remember I just-"
"ENGLIIIIIIIIIIIIISH"
"TITAAAAAANS!"


"ENGLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISH"
"TITAAAAAAAAAANS!"



"ENGLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISH"



"WHY AM I SO FLAMMABLE"
FORESHADOWING! :whistle:



"Dieu miséricordieux pourquoi as-tu abandonné?"
The correct phrasing is "Dieu miséricordieux pourquoi m'as-tu abandonné?" :p


The coast clear, Liane exercises her Slaanesh-given talents and plunders his ass.


"How did you-"
"Golden Rule."
But seriously, how do you do to always know where there's loot? Does Liane have a perk or something?



"Nope, you first."
"Waitwha-"
Just what exactly is that enemy? He looks like the Duke of Bedford's long lost cousin.



Might I ask yours?"
"... it's Jeanne."



Which design is more embarrassing? Cast your votes now.
Depends, if Gilles is slaaneshi, then he fits completely, if not then it's a draw, his hair is something, but Caster's fish-eyes are a big contender.



Here she is, come clad in a holy armlet."
So, Jeanne is apparently here to get grandpa Nurgle's blessing from one of his High Priests, does that means that she's bound to be the French Archaon, 'cause that would be totally badass?


In time of danger, I trust these two will serve you well. Go on, introduce yourselves."


And real soldiers, with armor and everything, you can't? No? Oh well.
Is that a quiver I see on Marcel's back? So he's our resident bowman?

Then there's the other guy who has a skin pigmentation that I'm pretty sure doesn't exist, that ridiculous hairstyle, and has to look so evil right off the bat that I can't help but feel he's not going to go the path of the villain.
Why, this Gilles de Rais chap seems like a lovely fellow! He's almost as trustworthy as the Duke of Bedford, the salt of the earth!
Oh come on, just because he has garish colors and a peculiar fashion sense doesn't mean that he's going to be evil.

*reads his Wikipédia article* WELL NEVERMIND! :o
We definitively found our group's resident Slaaneshi! Liane is a Tzeentchian, now I'm sure!
 
This is hardly a spoiler since you can infer from their portraits, but Colet and Marcel are the quintessential stereotypical thief and archer respectively.

That said, Marcel, from what I know, is the best Bowman, with a later-introduced Bowman being more magic-oriented.

That reminds me, in the next mission, your quintessential rival appears.
 
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But seriously, how do you do to always know where there's loot? Does Liane have a perk or something?
Proximity. Get anyone close enough and it shows up. To be more specific
gamefaq thingy said:
In every stage, there are hidden treasures. They can only be acquired
when an ally is stepping over the very spot where the item is located.
Fortunately, hidden items can be seen if any ally is just a tile
beside it, in any direction. Just think of it as a 9-tile square where
your character is in the center.

[ ][ ][ ]
[ ][X][ ]
[ ][ ][ ]
Colet, being the thief, can get a skill that automatically reveals all hidden loot in any map he's deployed in, so long as he stays alive for the map.

There are certain items that can only be obtained through hidden treasures and are lost forever if you don't find them.
 
Jesus Khorne how many one-note sidekicks is this game going to throw at you? It feels like you get at least two new party members every other update.

Tac strats are typically built to have large parties, balanced by allowing permadeath. Usually you fill these out with disposable mercs in the early game but this game doesn't allow you to get mercs or permadeath PCs so....

Yeah. Inertia I guess?
 
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