Grue
滅亡迅雷
- Location
- -
Fucking Dammit! [SI/Fuck if I know] (Yet another Salt Quest Knockoff)
- Thread starter InfiniteDaze
- Start date
The Grey Mage
Certified Team Flare Hater
- Location
- Parallel Universe 43-j
LostDeviljho
Flame Dragon Princess
- Location
- The glorious Pacific Northwest
- Pronouns
- Any
Are you sure? Because your post sure sounded like you had the wrong animal in the wrong slot.
The Grey Mage
Certified Team Flare Hater
- Location
- Parallel Universe 43-j
Positive.
LostDeviljho
Flame Dragon Princess
- Location
- The glorious Pacific Northwest
- Pronouns
- Any
I think you may just have met the wrong ferret then, because that post was completely backwards.
The Fourth Monado
S U B A R A S H I I
- Location
- Away
Friend of mine has a ferret. It's a total bro.
The Grey Mage
Certified Team Flare Hater
- Location
- Parallel Universe 43-j
Not really, even if I was exaggerating about ferrets (I don't really mind them, I just think rats are cuter). Rats (pet rats, not wild ones) are very clean and intelligent.
Grue
滅亡迅雷
- Location
- -
LostDeviljho
Flame Dragon Princess
- Location
- The glorious Pacific Northwest
- Pronouns
- Any
I don't like rodents in general, with two exceptions. Rats are not one of them.
The Grey Mage
Certified Team Flare Hater
- Location
- Parallel Universe 43-j
You're missing out.
LaRed
Are you stupid or something
- Location
- Mou Ikkai hell
Average Weird
Hi! Let's be friends!
- Location
- -
In Which I Don't Even Know What's Going On Anymore
InfiniteDaze
Too lazy to leave the house
- Location
- I wish I could stay
So I decided to let the dice roll and link some rolls together and it all went to hell.
If there's one thing I hate about Japan, it's the concept of indoor slippers. Luckily the pair I was currently weren't as bad as they could be?
I don't even know why the hell people wear that pair, they barely stay on your feet when you walk. Seriously those can burn in-
"Ah, here we go!" I shout as I pull out the shoes from the cabinet. They already have a pair for me already?
I quickly pull out the vanilla folder and check out the map. Let's see, if I'm reading this correctly I need to go-
My head whips around as a blond blur disappears around the corner of the wall. Is... someone watching me?
"Fu? Is that you?" I called out, slowly walking around to the wall before leaning over only to find a black haired girl gaping at the other end of the hall.
"Oh." I spoke, catching the girl's attention and giving her a wave. "Thought someone was watching me."
"Oh ye-" The girl began before this weird little jingle played from what I'm guessing is her phone causing her to twitch.
Hey wasn't that- lame.
I quickly gave a wave of goodbye before heading back out the-
The sound of a crash once again reached my ears.
-2 Sanity
Should I...
[] Go to it.
[] Ignore it.
Hm...
I mean, it could be a flag with how this day is going but it might be something crazy and, well...
Ah, it's decided.
[x] Ignore it.
I think I got off that route.
Chen Haze rolled 13 for Clow Card
The Shield.
"You wouldn't happen to have a pen would you?!" I shouted as Issei was blown into a wall by a thrown chair.
"How much more do you need?!" Hayate shouted exasperated, digging into her pocket before...
LUCK ROLL: 50> = 68 [SUCCEED]
Throwing a pen over to me as I caught it this time with my out stretched hand.
Thank you RNGesus.
I quickly tore the cap off and scribbled my name on it, causing the card to glow. I got the power now bitch!
Chen Haze rolled 76 for control!
Where there any modifiers on that?
1d100 - 20
Oh come on!
Well I can't complain. Still a pretty good roll, and now it's time to shield bash.
I quickly turned over to the side where Issei was struggling to not get beaten to a pulp by- oh hey he has Boosted Gear out.
Perfect.
Let's test this out shall we?
55% Adrenaline
42% Sanity
15% Fed up with the world
"Issei get out of the way!" I yelled as Usagi threw another chair at the poor bastard, before I jumped into the chairs prajectory. "The Shield!"
Chen Haze rolled 41 for shield!
The shield went up just as the chair reached my face, splitting it in two as I was sent flying into my own barrier that disappeared a moment later.
Chen Haze rolled 66 for damage!
40% Fed up with the world and rising
"I hate my life!" I groaned from the floor picking myself up. "You know, most SI's make sense I guess. This one doesn't. In the span of less than half an hour I've went from having a nice talk with Fu to fighting Sailor Moon who just so happens to be a tunnel snake and wants to make me water polo with a magical girl and a perverted dragon. Could this day get any weirder? It's already crap."
The moment I said that a big boom reached our ears from the outside along with a bright pink flash of light before the earth started to tremble.
Oh come on the dice weren't even rolled!
"Truce?" I asked, looking at the Tunnel Snake. "You're a CPU Candidate right? I think you have to investigate that or something."
"...Fine, for now." She spoke solemnly before deflating immediately. "Oh thank goodness! Do you know how hard it is to keep that up like jeepers I think I lost some of my girl points oh no whatever shall I do-"
Then she tripped and passed out causing her black haired friend (Rei?) to sigh before picking her up and walking out of the shop like nothing just happened.
FIGHT OVER! WINNER, CHEN HAZE!
BULLSHIT I WANTED TO HAVE IT END MORE AWESOMELY THEN THAT NOT LIKE THIS- Err, where was I?
"KYAAAA!!!" A black haired girl screamed as she ran into the ruined store with a white haired girl trailing off behind her. "AHHHHH!!!!"
"Miyu! Calm down!" Please not another crossover. "Kuro's fine! I think!"
Prism Ilya, great.
Another boom shook the ground causing Miyu to scream and panic even louder. My ears, gah!
"Calm down!" My mouth shouted before I knew what was happening. "What's going on?!"
"MY FRIEND IS DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The girl screeched, rupturing my eardrums once more. "AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"
"I TOLD YOU KURO'S FINE!" Ilya shouted back, hyperventilating. "She-She wouldn't die from something like that I just know it."
Doesn't she have that pain crest thing...?
"...Our friend Kuro was hit by one of those beams outside and vanished." Ilya began as Miyu continued to scream her lungs out. "It's-It's my fault. We got into an argument and-"
"And she ran away from home causing her to be caught up in the beam." I summarized much to her shock. Bright pink beam huh...? "Hey Hayate, do you know any idea what's going on?"
"Why do you assume I do?" The girl asked before sighing. "But.... Yes, let me ask-"
She didn't need to do anything before her phone rang and she picked it up immediately. "Hello? Fate, is that you?"
Silence for a few moments.
"What? This is Nanoha's fault? I can't hear you!"
We all stared at Hayate as she rambled on the phone for a bit. Okay so I say all of us but Issei was patching himself up, Miyu was still screaming like a headless chicken, and Ilya was just looking at the floor so really it was just me.
The fuck has become of my life.
"So..." I heared Hayate say slowly right before another boom shook the ground. "This all started... because you told Nanoha you're straight? Wait no hold on, you're not gay!?"
I can faintly hear screaming on the other side of the phone.
"Okay okay! I get it!" Hayate yells back, "Anyways we need to stop this before more people get hurt. Why aren't you trying to stop her?"
"..."
"...You're kidding. You have a device inspection today?"
"..."
"I see." Hayate says as she drops the phone. "Connection... lost."
...What do I do in a situation like this? I'm clearly the protagonist but I don't have the blind optimism that they usually have. I'm not really cut out to be a protagonist.
...I guess the only thing I can do is Fake it till I make it.
"Well," I sigh, standing up. "We need to leave. Now."
"...Huh?" Issei asks.
"It's not safe here." I explain slowly, "All of us are clearly not in tip top shape so we need to stay together. Luckily there's no zombies right?"
...Welcome to the apocalypse, I hope you like leather.
NYAAAAHHHHHHH
If there's one thing I hate about Japan, it's the concept of indoor slippers. Luckily the pair I was currently weren't as bad as they could be?
I don't even know why the hell people wear that pair, they barely stay on your feet when you walk. Seriously those can burn in-
"Ah, here we go!" I shout as I pull out the shoes from the cabinet. They already have a pair for me already?
I quickly pull out the vanilla folder and check out the map. Let's see, if I'm reading this correctly I need to go-
My head whips around as a blond blur disappears around the corner of the wall. Is... someone watching me?
"Fu? Is that you?" I called out, slowly walking around to the wall before leaning over only to find a black haired girl gaping at the other end of the hall.
"Oh." I spoke, catching the girl's attention and giving her a wave. "Thought someone was watching me."
"Oh ye-" The girl began before this weird little jingle played from what I'm guessing is her phone causing her to twitch.
Hey wasn't that- lame.
I quickly gave a wave of goodbye before heading back out the-
The sound of a crash once again reached my ears.
-2 Sanity
Should I...
[] Go to it.
[] Ignore it.
Hm...
I mean, it could be a flag with how this day is going but it might be something crazy and, well...
Ah, it's decided.
[x] Ignore it.
I think I got off that route.
NYAAAAAAHHHHHHH
The city was weird.
"Oi you there!" A brown haired teen shouted to me as he struggled to lift a white box up. "Mind giving me a hand?"
[X] Ignore
Do it you fucking idiot.
Alright alright!
With a sigh I walked over to the guy and grabbed the box from the other side- By the Saint Kings this is heavy! I struggled with all my might as we walked into a shop that looked like it was still under construction. Other boxes were scattered everywhere and a coffee machine was plugged into one side of the wall.
"Thanks man, I owe you one!" He exclaimed with a tired sigh, leaning on the counter. "I have no idea why I thought this was a good idea."
"What? Making a coffee shop?" I asked, looking around the place.
It was a clear mess.
"Yeah. But, I have a dream!" He shouted, fist in the air. "That one day, this place will be a perverts paradise! Where men and women alike can walk in and share their love of oppai together!"
"Wait so is this a sex shop?"
"Nope!" A cheery female voice piped in. "Everything here is PG! Except the porn, but you have to pay premium for that!"
I jumped up a bit before turning around to come face to face with a girl with short brown hair and equally brown eyes staring back at me in amusement.
"Ah Hayate, you're here! Same as usual I take it?" The teenager behind the counter asked, already filling up a cup of coffee. I watched in shock as he calmly fricken threw it at her and she caught it gracefully, not even spilling a single drop and moving around to the counter.
-2 Sanity
"Thanks Issei!" She replied before downing the cup in one go. The moment she was done she slammed the cup into the counter. "ANOTHER!"
"Gah! My ears!" I yelled, "Don't do that when you're right next to me!"
"Whoops! You okay?"
"Give me a second.... and good." I sighed before my ears caught up with me. "Say what did you say your name was?"
"Ah! I'm Hayate Yagami and that perv behind the counter is Issei Hyoudou!" What. "We founded this shop together after selling all our.. treasure. And robbing a bank, or two."
"Don't just say that out in the open!" Issei shouted, whacking Hayate on the head but I was focused on something else.
Highschool DxD, Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha, and Yuki Yuna is a Hero? What- I don't even- How does that even work?!
-5 Sanity
10% Fed up with the world
"Ah, my name is-"
"CHEN HAZE!" A voice shouted, literally kicking down the door and sending it flying much to Issei's indignation. "You are the new transfer student correct?!"
-10 Sanity
20% Adrenaline
In front of us stood a girl with blond pigtails in the style of Sailor Moon while wearing a leather jacket and a pair of shades.
"What the hell?!" I shouted at the top of my lungs. Instincts kicked in and immediately ducked down to avoid a flying kick to the face.
25% Adrenaline
"Ho, good instincts." She mused before returning her leg to the floor which I quickly used as a chance to launch myself away from the girl and head for the door. "Rei! Block the door!"
In a blur the girl from earlier in the hallway blocked my exit before mouthing a quick sorry.
"Let me explain myself. I, am Usagi Tsukino!" Because of course we had to add a Sailor Moon cross to the mix. "I lead the Tunnel Snakes, and we rule!"
Wait what.
-5 Sanity
"You seem like the perfect recruit!" She carried on, "But first we must conduct initiation, with Water Polo!"
-2 Sanity
"I don't even..." I mumbled, "The hell's water polo?!"
Wait this sounds familiar.
"Water Polo is the most manliest of sports!" Your a girl! "It is also the initiation of the Tunnel Snakes. Now, let us go!"
"No way!" I yelled, dodging away as she tried to grab me. "Fuck off!"
Ah crap.
[] Try to run away. +5% Fed Up With The World
[] Scream for help. +5 Sanity
[X] Listen to your instincts and fight back. +10 Adrenaline.
30% Adrenaline
74 Sanity
10% Fed Up With The World
Chen Haze VS USAGI TSUKINO - LEADER OF THE TUNNEL SNAKES AND CPU CANDIDATE
REALITY IS BREAKING! READY? FIGHT!
-10 Sanity
"What was that?" I asked, staring at the letters above us.
USAGI TSUKINO Rolled 99 for grapple!
Chen Haze rolled 81 for dodge!
-2 Sanity
"Bullshit! That's almost a nat100!" I yelled at the words as the blond haired girl charged at me. I quickly tried dodging to the side but before I could she grabbed onto my arm, wrapped her legs around my right foot and dragged me to the ground before I could do anything.
Chen Haze rolled -8 for Escape!
"HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?!" I shouted as I began to struggle against the blonde's grip. Suddenly her hands let go and she threw me into the air before catching me and pulling me on my shoulder.
And it was at that moment that the world froze.
DECISION TIME!
[] Call for help
[] Try to break free
[] Embrace the ChunniWarning, chunni level at 1%
I... I don't even know what's going on...
But...
But I can't do this alone.
[X] Call for help
"OI!" I shouted at the top of my lungs. "A LITTLE HELP HERE?!"
Chen Haze rolled 4 on a d6 for help!
"DUCK!" Issei's voice called over and before I could register it a brown blur came crashing down sending me flying and crashing into a wall.
Chen Haze damage roll...
Please no...
1.
-20 Sanity
And it was in that moment something clicked.
"Hey are you alright?" Hayate asked, bending over to where I laid slumped against the wall.
"Yeah." I coughed out. This day had been weird and I had no idea what the hell was going on besides the fact that Sailor Moon was some sort of gang leader and was willing to forcefully recruit me into the tunnel snakes while I had two superpowered pervs on my side. "You see that folder over there? I need you to go grab that. There's something in there that'll help us win."
50% Adrenaline
I'm starting to think that the pop ups don't even know what that means.
Also how am I not even injured? I got thrown into a wall.
Hayate just nods before jumping into the foray no questions asked. She must be used to this kind of thing if all it takes is a "We might win if I have something." speech.
"Grr," Usagi growls causing me to look over at the scene as Issei stands over her with a... broken chair? "You're going to pay for messing with the Tunnel Snakes."
"And you're going to pay for messing with my friends and my shop." Issei all but yells. "You may be a girl but that doesn't mean I'll go easy."
These two are so out of character that it doesn't even make any sense. Well, I guess Issei is sort of in character but that doesn't mean a thing compared to this bullshit Usagi. It's like they're all operating on sentient... dice...
Could it be?
So maybe If I could just get a good die roll I could...
"Chen!" Hayate shouts before tossing the folder like a frisby. "Here!"
I tried catching it but it hit the wall next to me instead, causing some of the papers to get loose and all over the floor. I grabbed the...
[] Occult flyer
[X] Card
Let's hope lady luck is on my side..."Oi you there!" A brown haired teen shouted to me as he struggled to lift a white box up. "Mind giving me a hand?"
Do it you fucking idiot.
Alright alright!
With a sigh I walked over to the guy and grabbed the box from the other side- By the Saint Kings this is heavy! I struggled with all my might as we walked into a shop that looked like it was still under construction. Other boxes were scattered everywhere and a coffee machine was plugged into one side of the wall.
"Thanks man, I owe you one!" He exclaimed with a tired sigh, leaning on the counter. "I have no idea why I thought this was a good idea."
"What? Making a coffee shop?" I asked, looking around the place.
It was a clear mess.
"Yeah. But, I have a dream!" He shouted, fist in the air. "That one day, this place will be a perverts paradise! Where men and women alike can walk in and share their love of oppai together!"
"Wait so is this a sex shop?"
"Nope!" A cheery female voice piped in. "Everything here is PG! Except the porn, but you have to pay premium for that!"
I jumped up a bit before turning around to come face to face with a girl with short brown hair and equally brown eyes staring back at me in amusement.
"Ah Hayate, you're here! Same as usual I take it?" The teenager behind the counter asked, already filling up a cup of coffee. I watched in shock as he calmly fricken threw it at her and she caught it gracefully, not even spilling a single drop and moving around to the counter.
-2 Sanity
"Thanks Issei!" She replied before downing the cup in one go. The moment she was done she slammed the cup into the counter. "ANOTHER!"
"Gah! My ears!" I yelled, "Don't do that when you're right next to me!"
"Whoops! You okay?"
"Give me a second.... and good." I sighed before my ears caught up with me. "Say what did you say your name was?"
"Ah! I'm Hayate Yagami and that perv behind the counter is Issei Hyoudou!" What. "We founded this shop together after selling all our.. treasure. And robbing a bank, or two."
"Don't just say that out in the open!" Issei shouted, whacking Hayate on the head but I was focused on something else.
Highschool DxD, Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha, and Yuki Yuna is a Hero? What- I don't even- How does that even work?!
-5 Sanity
10% Fed up with the world
"Ah, my name is-"
"CHEN HAZE!" A voice shouted, literally kicking down the door and sending it flying much to Issei's indignation. "You are the new transfer student correct?!"
-10 Sanity
20% Adrenaline
In front of us stood a girl with blond pigtails in the style of Sailor Moon while wearing a leather jacket and a pair of shades.
"What the hell?!" I shouted at the top of my lungs. Instincts kicked in and immediately ducked down to avoid a flying kick to the face.
25% Adrenaline
"Ho, good instincts." She mused before returning her leg to the floor which I quickly used as a chance to launch myself away from the girl and head for the door. "Rei! Block the door!"
In a blur the girl from earlier in the hallway blocked my exit before mouthing a quick sorry.
"Let me explain myself. I, am Usagi Tsukino!" Because of course we had to add a Sailor Moon cross to the mix. "I lead the Tunnel Snakes, and we rule!"
Wait what.
-5 Sanity
"You seem like the perfect recruit!" She carried on, "But first we must conduct initiation, with Water Polo!"
-2 Sanity
"I don't even..." I mumbled, "The hell's water polo?!"
Wait this sounds familiar.
"Water Polo is the most manliest of sports!" Your a girl! "It is also the initiation of the Tunnel Snakes. Now, let us go!"
"No way!" I yelled, dodging away as she tried to grab me. "Fuck off!"
Ah crap.
[] Try to run away. +5% Fed Up With The World
[] Scream for help. +5 Sanity
[X] Listen to your instincts and fight back. +10 Adrenaline.
30% Adrenaline
74 Sanity
10% Fed Up With The World
Chen Haze VS USAGI TSUKINO - LEADER OF THE TUNNEL SNAKES AND CPU CANDIDATE
REALITY IS BREAKING! READY? FIGHT!
-10 Sanity
"What was that?" I asked, staring at the letters above us.
USAGI TSUKINO Rolled 99 for grapple!
Chen Haze rolled 81 for dodge!
-2 Sanity
"Bullshit! That's almost a nat100!" I yelled at the words as the blond haired girl charged at me. I quickly tried dodging to the side but before I could she grabbed onto my arm, wrapped her legs around my right foot and dragged me to the ground before I could do anything.
Chen Haze rolled -8 for Escape!
"HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?!" I shouted as I began to struggle against the blonde's grip. Suddenly her hands let go and she threw me into the air before catching me and pulling me on my shoulder.
And it was at that moment that the world froze.
DECISION TIME!
[] Call for help
[] Try to break free
[] Embrace the Chunni
I... I don't even know what's going on...
But...
But I can't do this alone.
[X] Call for help
"OI!" I shouted at the top of my lungs. "A LITTLE HELP HERE?!"
Chen Haze rolled 4 on a d6 for help!
"DUCK!" Issei's voice called over and before I could register it a brown blur came crashing down sending me flying and crashing into a wall.
Chen Haze damage roll...
Please no...
1.
-20 Sanity
And it was in that moment something clicked.
"Hey are you alright?" Hayate asked, bending over to where I laid slumped against the wall.
"Yeah." I coughed out. This day had been weird and I had no idea what the hell was going on besides the fact that Sailor Moon was some sort of gang leader and was willing to forcefully recruit me into the tunnel snakes while I had two superpowered pervs on my side. "You see that folder over there? I need you to go grab that. There's something in there that'll help us win."
50% Adrenaline
I'm starting to think that the pop ups don't even know what that means.
Also how am I not even injured? I got thrown into a wall.
Hayate just nods before jumping into the foray no questions asked. She must be used to this kind of thing if all it takes is a "We might win if I have something." speech.
"Grr," Usagi growls causing me to look over at the scene as Issei stands over her with a... broken chair? "You're going to pay for messing with the Tunnel Snakes."
"And you're going to pay for messing with my friends and my shop." Issei all but yells. "You may be a girl but that doesn't mean I'll go easy."
These two are so out of character that it doesn't even make any sense. Well, I guess Issei is sort of in character but that doesn't mean a thing compared to this bullshit Usagi. It's like they're all operating on sentient... dice...
Could it be?
So maybe If I could just get a good die roll I could...
"Chen!" Hayate shouts before tossing the folder like a frisby. "Here!"
I tried catching it but it hit the wall next to me instead, causing some of the papers to get loose and all over the floor. I grabbed the...
[] Occult flyer
[X] Card
Chen Haze rolled 13 for Clow Card
The Shield.
"You wouldn't happen to have a pen would you?!" I shouted as Issei was blown into a wall by a thrown chair.
"How much more do you need?!" Hayate shouted exasperated, digging into her pocket before...
LUCK ROLL: 50> = 68 [SUCCEED]
Throwing a pen over to me as I caught it this time with my out stretched hand.
Thank you RNGesus.
Chen Haze rolled 76 for control!
Where there any modifiers on that?
1d100 - 20
Oh come on!
Well I can't complain. Still a pretty good roll, and now it's time to shield bash.
I quickly turned over to the side where Issei was struggling to not get beaten to a pulp by- oh hey he has Boosted Gear out.
Perfect.
Let's test this out shall we?
55% Adrenaline
42% Sanity
15% Fed up with the world
"Issei get out of the way!" I yelled as Usagi threw another chair at the poor bastard, before I jumped into the chairs prajectory. "The Shield!"
Chen Haze rolled 41 for shield!
The shield went up just as the chair reached my face, splitting it in two as I was sent flying into my own barrier that disappeared a moment later.
Chen Haze rolled 66 for damage!
40% Fed up with the world and rising
"I hate my life!" I groaned from the floor picking myself up. "You know, most SI's make sense I guess. This one doesn't. In the span of less than half an hour I've went from having a nice talk with Fu to fighting Sailor Moon who just so happens to be a tunnel snake and wants to make me water polo with a magical girl and a perverted dragon. Could this day get any weirder? It's already crap."
The moment I said that a big boom reached our ears from the outside along with a bright pink flash of light before the earth started to tremble.
Oh come on the dice weren't even rolled!
"Truce?" I asked, looking at the Tunnel Snake. "You're a CPU Candidate right? I think you have to investigate that or something."
"...Fine, for now." She spoke solemnly before deflating immediately. "Oh thank goodness! Do you know how hard it is to keep that up like jeepers I think I lost some of my girl points oh no whatever shall I do-"
Then she tripped and passed out causing her black haired friend (Rei?) to sigh before picking her up and walking out of the shop like nothing just happened.
FIGHT OVER! WINNER, CHEN HAZE!
BULLSHIT I WANTED TO HAVE IT END MORE AWESOMELY THEN THAT NOT LIKE THIS- Err, where was I?
"KYAAAA!!!" A black haired girl screamed as she ran into the ruined store with a white haired girl trailing off behind her. "AHHHHH!!!!"
"Miyu! Calm down!" Please not another crossover. "Kuro's fine! I think!"
Prism Ilya, great.
Another boom shook the ground causing Miyu to scream and panic even louder. My ears, gah!
"Calm down!" My mouth shouted before I knew what was happening. "What's going on?!"
"MY FRIEND IS DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The girl screeched, rupturing my eardrums once more. "AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"
"I TOLD YOU KURO'S FINE!" Ilya shouted back, hyperventilating. "She-She wouldn't die from something like that I just know it."
Doesn't she have that pain crest thing...?
"...Our friend Kuro was hit by one of those beams outside and vanished." Ilya began as Miyu continued to scream her lungs out. "It's-It's my fault. We got into an argument and-"
"And she ran away from home causing her to be caught up in the beam." I summarized much to her shock. Bright pink beam huh...? "Hey Hayate, do you know any idea what's going on?"
"Why do you assume I do?" The girl asked before sighing. "But.... Yes, let me ask-"
She didn't need to do anything before her phone rang and she picked it up immediately. "Hello? Fate, is that you?"
Silence for a few moments.
"What? This is Nanoha's fault? I can't hear you!"
We all stared at Hayate as she rambled on the phone for a bit. Okay so I say all of us but Issei was patching himself up, Miyu was still screaming like a headless chicken, and Ilya was just looking at the floor so really it was just me.
The fuck has become of my life.
"So..." I heared Hayate say slowly right before another boom shook the ground. "This all started... because you told Nanoha you're straight? Wait no hold on, you're not gay!?"
I can faintly hear screaming on the other side of the phone.
"Okay okay! I get it!" Hayate yells back, "Anyways we need to stop this before more people get hurt. Why aren't you trying to stop her?"
"..."
"...You're kidding. You have a device inspection today?"
"..."
"I see." Hayate says as she drops the phone. "Connection... lost."
...What do I do in a situation like this? I'm clearly the protagonist but I don't have the blind optimism that they usually have. I'm not really cut out to be a protagonist.
...I guess the only thing I can do is Fake it till I make it.
"Well," I sigh, standing up. "We need to leave. Now."
"...Huh?" Issei asks.
"It's not safe here." I explain slowly, "All of us are clearly not in tip top shape so we need to stay together. Luckily there's no zombies right?"
...Welcome to the apocalypse, I hope you like leather.
NYAAAAAAHHHHHHH
Meanwhile elsewhere
A wheelchair bound girl with blue eyes sits in an abandoned pet shop as the explosions go off. Her best friend, passed out and lying on the floor. She watches idly as a nearby ferret escapes from his cage and crawls over her friend before looking at her.
"Come here," She says gently, "Don't worry I won't harm you."
Sensing no killing intent from the girl, the ferret crawls his way up to her wheelchair and on her leg before he is picked up by the girl and held up high.
"Yes." The girl declares, holding him to the open light. "You shall be the one to help me undo all the wrongs that Masaki and his legions of fanboys have done to this world. And you shall be called... Yuuno."
After declaring this she puts the Ferret on her lap and giggles as he runs up to her neck before curling around it. She quickly quiets down before bending over and picking up her friend's hand. "I'm sorry Yuna, I do like you, but not like that."
She gently puts the hand down before leaning back and closing her eyes.
...Only to open them again as her other friend wakes up from her nap.
"Mm." The girl groans, "Tougo?"
"Did you have a nice nap Itsuki?" Tougo asks sweetly, "It looked very peaceful."
"I don't think so. For some reason I don't want to have a blueberry muffin any more. Do they taste good?"
Oh. Dear.
[] DICE
"Come here," She says gently, "Don't worry I won't harm you."
Sensing no killing intent from the girl, the ferret crawls his way up to her wheelchair and on her leg before he is picked up by the girl and held up high.
"Yes." The girl declares, holding him to the open light. "You shall be the one to help me undo all the wrongs that Masaki and his legions of fanboys have done to this world. And you shall be called... Yuuno."
After declaring this she puts the Ferret on her lap and giggles as he runs up to her neck before curling around it. She quickly quiets down before bending over and picking up her friend's hand. "I'm sorry Yuna, I do like you, but not like that."
She gently puts the hand down before leaning back and closing her eyes.
...Only to open them again as her other friend wakes up from her nap.
"Mm." The girl groans, "Tougo?"
"Did you have a nice nap Itsuki?" Tougo asks sweetly, "It looked very peaceful."
"I don't think so. For some reason I don't want to have a blueberry muffin any more. Do they taste good?"
Oh. Dear.
[] DICE
NYAAAAHHHHHHHH
Last edited:
Mortifer
Embrace your inner lunatic. Fun times guaranteed.
- Location
- Under a rock.
Perfect.
[X] Aha! After much investigation into the Dark Kingdom, you have found it's leader! Go in and accuse Naru's Mother of being Queen Beryl. When she undoubtedly attacks you to keep her secret, your Magical Girl friends will pounce and eliminate the threat once and for all!
[X] Aha! After much investigation into the Dark Kingdom, you have found it's leader! Go in and accuse Naru's Mother of being Queen Beryl. When she undoubtedly attacks you to keep her secret, your Magical Girl friends will pounce and eliminate the threat once and for all!
Khawy
TITANNNNNNNNNNN
- Location
- The United States of America
[x] You have a dream. A dream sent to you by the great and all mighty Sky Badger. In it, your progeny rules the Earth. But there is one obstacle you must overcome first. And that is the Tunnel Snakes. Reveal yourself as the Disciple of the Sky Badger and recruit that Chen Haze before the Snakes sink their fangs into him!
- Location
- The Great Beyond
- Pronouns
- He/She/They
[X] Follow Chen Haze everywhere. Interpret everything he says as innuendo aimed at you to the very best of your ability.
Edit: I'd complain about my second low roll in a row this quest but the glory of the high roll in Grue la Grue is too strong for me to care.
Edit: I'd complain about my second low roll in a row this quest but the glory of the high roll in Grue la Grue is too strong for me to care.
Last edited:
Average Weird
Hi! Let's be friends!
- Location
- -
[x] Chen Haze has tickets to that Zwei Wing concert? You neeed to get them. By any means possible.
The Grey Mage
Certified Team Flare Hater
- Location
- Parallel Universe 43-j
[X] Become a God.
Dr. Snark
Exactly As Planned...Probably
- Location
- Right where I want to be
- Pronouns
- He/His/Him
Oh dear god we put Hayate and Issei in the same room.
I'm not sure if the universe is capable of having that much perversion in one place.
Then again given how everything went wrong when that was revealed, I believe the correct answer to that is "it can't"
I'm not sure if the universe is capable of having that much perversion in one place.
Then again given how everything went wrong when that was revealed, I believe the correct answer to that is "it can't"
SlugSLinger
Seeker of Originality
- Location
- Somewhere in the Jungles of S.E.A
[x] An army must be raised to bring down Masaki and his hordes. Gather the vindictive, the heartbroken, the saltiest of salties, those who were denied what was theirs, and lead them to the one who bears Yuuno the Ferret.