Bound to Earth: A CK2 Earthbound Quest in an 8-bit Dystopia

[KnownParadox]

A Missed Chance (Omake)

. . . . .

Data flows by its optics at a breakneck pace, almost too fast for any average organic to catch. Telemetry, weather patterns, any unaffiliated flyers, and any anomalous changes on the moon of Zerbes. That was what it saw pass through the large screen every minute of every hour of every day curated by the others in the room. It occasionally clicked on the keyboard in front of it for opaque reasons, even to itself sometimes.

Not for the first time, Supervisor Eggrobo-2346 wondered why it's GLORIOUS, GENIUS, HANDSOME creator didn't allow his creations to interface directly with the sensors and databases. Surely the increase in productivity and smaller expenses in things like big clicky keyboards or big obnoxious monitors was obvious.

(Data Scanner Eggrobo-2345 observed a curious extraterrestrial object. Detailed scans suggested some sort of meteor, not particularly large. The only thing that drew its attention was that it was on an odd trajectory, going the long way around to avoid Zerbes before landing somewhere that was yet to be predicted.)

Eggrobo-2346 mentally shook itself and went back to work, surreptitiously looking around to make sure it's minions, other identical Eggrobo models, weren't paying attention to it and more attention to their own somehow even more boring work.

No? Good. Although, if they had caught itself slacking that would mean they hadn't been using 100% of their focus on their own, sufficient for prompt punishment. Some sort of controlled shock maybe. Yeah, that would brighten up its day…

(Eggrobo-2345 promptly put together this info into one easily read file, exactly by the book, efficient. This could easily be an infiltrator of some sort, an advance scout, or even a saboteur. It could also just be a meteor, which could provide rare metals or any exotic materials which could only be found in the depths of space and was understandably in short supply.)

There it went again. Eggrobo-2346 subtly shook its head and tried to focus again. Yeah yeah, rain clouds forming alert the weather team that it seemed to be filled with more mercury than usual, Zerbes was lighting up again, concerning, no signs of any Wily Corp drones in restricted airspace, just like the last two weeks, also concerning, maybe alert border patrol to check for invisible foes or diggers. It went through this efficiently, as expected of its genius, ALTHOUGH NOT AS MUCH OF A GENIUS AS ITS GLORIOUS, GENIUS, HANDSOME CREATOR OF COURSE.

(And… sent. It sideyed its Supervisor for a few seconds, a break in protocol but it wasn't every day a potential alien approached The City and wanted to see its reaction.)

It halted for a fraction of a second, optics unseeing. It was feeling things again, it hated that. Boredom, irritation, apathy. All breaks in its perfect rational machine mind. Questions rose up from the depths of its processor again, like why its GLORIOUS, GENIUS, HANDSOME creator bothered to make something that could feel boredom and then make them do menial labour below the impressive minds they were granted. It understood the origins of course. Robots designed to emulate its creator to do tasks the creator wouldn't with all the genius of the original. It also knew it wasn't exactly up to the standards of the original, but still greatly intelligent of course!

(Eggrobo-2345 saw its Supervisor freeze up shortly after it sent the file. Was it really that bad? Did it know something it itself didn't? He grew more obvious with its staring. Other Eggrobo began to notice and start glancing at it and the Supervisor.)

But really, was its GLORIOUS, GENIUS, HANDSOME creator so shortsighted not to see the problem here? If it simply had time to itself Eggrobo-2346 was sure it could design a better system and-

[DISLOYALTY RECOGNIZED, SECOND STRIKE IN ONE STANDARD MONTH, APPLYING LIMITED CONTROLLED SHOCK. CEASE AND DESIST. THE THIRD STRIKE WILL BE YOUR LAST.]

(The rest saw nothing but the still form of the Supervisor, and then a brief shake. Was… was it that bad? Oh, this was above their pay grade. They didn't know anything about this, but the reaction of their Supervisor surely meant it was just classified and they weren't meant to know.)

-Pain and confusion. That was all it felt for a few brief seconds. The electricity surging through its form scrambling its core and data for a few crucial seconds. What was it thinking about again? It shuddered involuntarily again, before looking around again.

The minions were staring at it. Oh, no. How long did it just sit there thinking of nothing in particular?

(Oh no the Supervisor saw them staring. They all quickly turned back to their screens again and acted like they hadn't been breaking protocol and not doing work during active hours.)

Head Supervisor Eggrobo-2346 quickly went back to work, barely even reading the headlines of the dozen files that had built up in the long 15 seconds it hadn't been paying attention. Breaking through the backlog and haphazardly sorting it all in, weather, weather, shot down a kite, meteor or something, weird bird flew through a ferris wheel, more… it alerted its minions that laziness would be punished and that any further breaks in protocol would be solved via controlled shock.

There. Made sure its minions wouldn't speak of its pause, brief amusement, now it had to frantically move through the backlog.

(Staring fixedly at its screen, Data Scanner Eggrobo-2345 noticed that the Supervisor just went back to work. The conclusion was obvious. Whatever this was, was classified, and they shouldn't speak or even think about it again and let any higher grade Eggrobo or some other intelligent but not as intelligent as itself bots handle it. Surely, the Supervisor knew what it was doing.)

Thank its GLORIOUS, GENIUS, HANDSOME creator that it managed to play it cool. It was sure its brief pause wasn't that bad anyways. What were the odds something important happened in the one-quarter of a minute it wasn't looking? None. Nil. Minimal. Obviously.

And so, an extraterrestrial object landed in the low-value Area "Eagle County", making a crater on a hill that sent the local law enforcement into a tizzy, like a stone dropped on top of an anthill, totally unnoticed by anyone important.

Even if Data Scanner Eggrobo-2345 thought to bring it up again at a later date, it would be moot, since before that could theoretically happen the entire crew would be suddenly conscripted in a sudden fight against "inclement weather" that locals called the Blue Blur, and they would be summarily destroyed and recycled.

 

[The3rdCorinthian]

Coming at you with the tunes that not even Robot Masters can resist! It's the one, the only –

JET SET RADIOOO!!!​

I'm DJ Professor K, your one stop shop to the beat of The City, broadcasting from Tokyo-to!

You know, times like these, I can't help but feel a little unloved. Over the past month, I've only gotten one attempt from some corp or other trying to shut us over at JSR down for good. It's almost like the Man is saying he doesn't care enough to try and squash me, you know?

But hey – that just means I gotta put in the effort to make sure that the sweet sound of free expression blasting across the airwaves ain't something that can be ignored! You let this City make you conform to survive, and you aint never gonna live! So let's get risky, stick out, and raise some noise until the Keisatsu get off their keisters!



Alright then, let's hit it off with the Local news!

First up! Rokaku's hiring a new member of the TPD – hothead by the name of Onishima. All info on the new piece of bacon is that he's more trigger happy than effective. But hey, Shoot first, ask questions never is just how Tokyo-to goes.

To all the Rudies out there trying to spread their name across Tokyo, keep an eye out. Just cause the Keisatsu's a joke like usual doesn't mean you should take it easy. This new hogs revolver isn't filled with rubber bullets, and last I checked, getting shot was not cool. Keep yourself safe whilst taggin the streets.

Speakin of which!

Poison Jam and the Love Shockers have been competing over turf as of late. We got tags getting covered and Rudies from both gangs trying to out-style each overs skating tricks for the rep. Any hotter, and things might move into a full blown confrontation, not that these are the kinda gangs to just start blasting at each other. One good thing bout this part of The City.

If anyone asks me to put my money on the victor? Well, Love Shockers have been on a roll for a while now, and I don't see them breaking their streak with this one. Sorry Poison Jam fans. But hey, Poison Jam are some tough ass Kaiju, and I don't see a loss here as something that'll keep 'em down. Love shockers might wanna make sure they don't spread too thin across these districts and write themselves a check they can't pay up.

If the Love Shockers and Posion Jam seem to be curdling up a storm, then you're not gonna like this next bit on the Weather. Got a smog comin in, one of the real thick ones. A Rudie can't even see their own feet as they grind rails in this chemical soup. If you ain't got proper filters for your mask, don't even think about trying to go out in that. Course if you got your stuff, well, the cops can't shoot what they can't see, am I right? It'll be a crying shame if their junk aint covered in Tags by the time this clears.

And lastly, well… look, it aint really news, but call it more of a hunch. We got a new upstart Rudie on the scene, with big green shades and a cocky attitude. Guy thinks he oughta be in charge of whatever crew he's with. He's got skills, I'll give him that, but some are probably thinking he's more trouble than it's worth. Hotshot Rudies aren't exactly uncommon in Tokyo-to. Still, the guy might get over himself a little if he finds someone to hang with. Who knows? Maybe the kid'll burn out and we never hear from him again, but hey. Can't say I don't like an underdog story.



Anyway, that's the Tokyo-to local. Bit quiet round here for a change huh? Soon, were' gonna be covering the low-down sounds from right across the City! But right now? Now, I think we just need some sweet tunes to remind us of what we need in life! Here's our good old reliable pal Hideki Naganuma. He's here reminding all of us that there ain't - nothing - , like a Funky Beat.




View: https://youtu.be/PWHFr9KJGBk



And we're back with more of the high speed, all free, pirate radio that anyone who ain't on top of this junk pile knows and loves,

JET SET RADIOOO!!!​

Here's coming at you with the news from across this City!

First off – Zebes just gave us one heck of a light show, huh? No word from Metapharm as of yet, hell it even looks like they're trying to avoid talking bout it. Kinda strange that it matched with that Meteor Shower though, right? The meteor shower that just so happened to have an alert about it long before anyone else had even detected it? Now aint that all something.

Alright, alright, you don't need to be a Professor to see the writing on the wall. Somethings fishy about the whole thing. Metapharm knows something that it's not talking about, and they knew it was coming a long time in advance.

So what's going on? What's happening up there Professor K I hear you cry? Well, you see folks…

THE HELL IF I KNOOOOOOW!​

Heh, but seriously. Just cause yours truly is the guy with a degree doesn't mean I know the first clue about what's happening up on that moon of ours. The City's a big place, PD'S Bigger, and the universe? Man, it's so big you'd go nuts just thinking about it. Sometimes, Mysteries are just gonna remain mysteries. All we got now are guesses – and anyone who's telling you they know 100% for certain? They're either trying to scam you out of your money, your kidneys, or hell maybe both.



And now, something mildly interesting from over in The Eagle Quarter! Hey, it happens people! More than you'd think and less than you'd hear!

Word on the Streets of Onett is that their police departments gone off the deep end. Still, this is EQ, so that just means they decided to go for the road-shutdown world record instead of bringing out the Tanks and Snipers. Still, even a small town like that got it's own kind of Rudies, and the Sharks have started to mobilise from a bunch of teens bored out of their minds to an actual band of tough-guys. Now me, I'm all for tagging stuff and thumbing your nose at authority, and hey a little roughhousing didn't hurt nobody. Well mostly. But from what I'm hearing, it's starting to look a little bit more like the rest of the City over there. Even the Crows are attacking people and stealing grandma's cookies! If even a sleepy, kinda safe place like that can start to turn into something like the rest of us… well, world ends up feeling that little bit bleaker, don't it?

Staying in Eagle Quarter for the moment, and I'm going to have to give some bad news to all the folks from River City. Those cool cat guys The Runaway Five won't be touring over there anytime soon. They've just signed on for the Deal of a Lifetime over in Twoson, and for those who know about the Chaos Theatre, Lifetime means lifetime – if old age don't get you, then you can expect to make like the lil mermaid and dance until you drop dead. Anyone who wants to hear these runaway guys play some real folk blues, get yourself to the Eagle Quarter while you still got the chance.

News just in on some of Robodynes latest Products, and by that I of course mean their defects. Defect in this case meaning that it's got a bad case of getting whacked upside with a Hammer. Kinda interesting that it's only the Green ones suffering from it though. Why if you had to ask your ol pal K? I'd wager that someone thought they looked like something else and decided to get busy with the mallet. There's a lot of things in the Pipeworks where most of the excavation those Grounder units do takes place. Lotta guys end up making their own personal Kingdoms. Good reminder to that Egg Shaped looting and polluting geezer that his third rate knockoff droids aint always gonna cut it, not that he'd ever admit he made a mistake of course.

Ah, nothing brings a smile to my face like seeing one of the Big Three get setback, even if its just a little. Well, usually nothing… except our last story for the moment.

Yep, it's that same Broadcast again folks. The one that sounds like a certain wise guy from a time this City of ours was a little Lighter, if you pick up what I'm putting down. Now we've all heard WilyCorps claims on the subject, and honestly, I'm hearing a lot of people aren't wanting to believe it's the Good Doctor either. Too scared that they'll be disappointed when it turns out to just be smoke, mirrors, and a lot of Hokum.

Damn, but this City really has fallen, hasn't it, when even hoping for something feels like a risk? Well y'all, Professor K here has his own takes on this whole thing, and maybe it's something you need to hear.

Now me? I know a thing or two about broadcasting. I run a pirate Radio station that you're listening to right now, so I think I got some experience on the subject. I know how to hide my tracks, and I know how to trace a signal. If you're wondering how I've managed to stay ahead of the pork chops for so long, well it ain't just luck.

So the other day? I got curious. This Broadcast, where's it coming from? Now WilyCorp hasn't found the one behind it yet, but on this particular subject matter, I'd say I do know a thing or two more than them. I'm a specialist, and in my element at that. Old Wily's having to work on half a dozen projects at once, no way he can give this his full attention. Maybe I can figure out what's going on before they decide to arrange an 'accident' for the guy blasting out a light in the darkness.

You wanna know what I found when I traced that signal?

Nothing.

Couldn't even get the first clue on where that signal was coming from.

Now I wasn't expecting to get something accurate. But nothing at all? From me? Whoever was broadcasting this signal, they're something else. Not a lot of folks out there capable of doing something like that.

So you know. It's no guarantee that it's the man himself, but if there was anyone capable of pulling off something like this… well, he's one of the few people who could. That might not be enough for some of you, but hope aint something you can guarantee will hold true. You just gotta keep believing that past all of the sadness that can be felt in this City… maybe it doesn't need to be this way. Maybe we can make it better. Nothing sure about any of that. But you gotta take what you can get, and keep holding on. Else what's the point of living, huh?



…Heh. Sorry y'all. This whole Broadcast deal has got your pal K in a… sentimental mood.

…Yo hey wait - is that the Cop Alarm? It's been a month since someone tried to block our airwaves, let alone trace us?... Well damn Rokaku, so you were trying to get me to lower my guard while you were tracking my signal the whole time! And hey, first attempt you've done that I can actually hear the sirens! Man, I'm feeling real flattered, you old coot, and here I thought you'd forgotten me. We're gonna have to go for now, And I'm gonna blast out I Wanna Kno by 2mello as we do. We'll be back on air once the Fuzz is off our tail, with the lowdown on everything from the World Warrior Tournament to the King of Iron Fist. Until then, this is DJ Professor K, reminding you to listen to the sound of free music and real vibes here on

JET SET RADIOOO!!!​

 

[griffinlw]

Picky Picks a Fight. (Omake)

---

"I'm bored…" Picky mumbled to himself, lying spread eagle in the grass outside his house. Normally he would find some way to occupy himself in town but…

The library was boring, city hall was boring, he didn't have any money to shop at any of the stores, the Sharks had claimed the arcade as their home turf, and Onett was currently on lockdown or whatever thanks to the police.

He tried to get into the arcade a few times after the Sharks took it over, but they always either told him to get lost or to pay the toll. Once he tried offering to join them if they let him play but they brushed him off because he was so young. One of them told him to "come back once he's finished Earthbound"

So that wasn't going to happen.

"That settles it." Picky got up, scooped up the nearest stick, and pointed it at the sky. "It's time for an adventure!"

Well, he can't go anywhere he hasn't been before considering Onett is on lockdown and he needs to be home in time for dinner, but he could still poke around somewhere. The Hill, The Woods, Beak Point?

After a little consideration, Picky shrugged and headed towards the hill, stick in hand. The view of the rest of town is awesome, and most people don't like the hike so he'll have the whole place to himself.

Probably.

Picky walked up the hill from his house with a childish spring in his step and a long wooden stick in his hand. It wasn't much of a tool or a weapon, but Picky liked to pretend that it was one. It made him feel cool to imagine he was carrying a sword or a magic wand or something.

The walk up the hill wasn't a particularly long or arduous one, even for a kid as young as Picky. But Picky wasn't beelining straight for the top of the hill, instead, he would walk off the beaten path and poke through the bushes or see if he could climb a tree.

What was an adventure without a little exploring?

Halfway up the trail he pushed aside some bushes and came face to face with a snake, which immediately coiled up like a spring and hissed at him.

"Woah!" Picky lept back and brandished the stick. "I could just leave Mr. Snake alone but…"

Adventures fought monsters, that's what his books and games always said. The snake was just an animal but, this was about as close to a random encounter as you could get.

Now humming a battle theme and circling the snake, Picky thought about his options, or at least the options his favorite game presented him. Attack, Defend, cast a Spell, use a Skill, or Run Away. Whacking it with the stick was always a good idea, not getting hurt was also good. He's never cast a spell before but he remembered the chant from one of his comics. Running away was for cowards, and he wasn't 100% sure what would he could do that could be called a "skill." So for now...

"Defend!" Picky called out before crossing his arms in front of his chest and ducking his head behind them.

After a few seconds, he poked his head out to see the Coil Snake staring at him.

"You're supposed to attack, it's your turn," Picky explained.

The Snake said nothing, just flicking its tongue at him

Picky's turn again. Defending wasn't going to get him anywhere so he should probably try actually attacking it. But just hitting it was boring. Why not cast a spell?

"Fire burning in my belly," Picky waved the stick around, trying to draw the shape of a flame in the air. It looked more like he was conducting an invisible band.

"Fire burning in the stars… uh, how did the rest of it go?" Picky froze for a moment before shaking his head and thrusting the stick forward. "Fire!" The stick hit the snake directly in the head.

The snake shot forward like a spring, using its tail to propel itself directly into Picky's face

"AHHHHHH!" Picky screamed and fell onto his back, flailing wildly as the snake whipped around his body like a long green noodle. After several drawn-out moments of panic, Picky managed to hit the snake with a lucky swish of his stick and send the green menace spiraling through the air before it crashed in a heap.

Picky sat up, breathing heavily and wiping sweat off his face as the dazed reptile lay still in a heap. The snake was on it's back, mouth open and tongue lolling out as if it were dead. After a moment of hesitation, Picky raised his stick to the sky and called out "Victory!" After holding the pose for a minute his arms got tired and he drooped back down to his normal stance. He wasn't really hurt or anything, but he felt a little scratched up, dirty, and most importantly...

"Man... adventuring is thirsty work. I hope mom has some lemonade at the house" Leaving his vanquished opponent on the floor, Picky headed back to his house. After making it about a 1/3rd of the way to the Hill

After Picky left the Snake remained flat on its back for another minute or so. After it felt sure he wouldn't return, the snake rolled back onto its stomach and quickly fled into the nearest patch of bushes.

Picky, unaware of his great enemy's revival, walked back home with a spring in his step, and an unquenchable thirst for lemonade. Although maybe some bandaids and a bath wouldn't be too bad either.

---

My autocorrect kept trying to turn Picky into Pocky and otherwise screwing with my writing. Having Picky go on his own misadventures on his own makes excellent fodder for Omakes, but if he joins our crew or gets busy being important I may back off.

Also, if anyone wants to take a crack at guessing where Picky got the incantation from I'd be very impressed. It's from a game "series" (there are only two of them) that got its start on the GBA so I don't know if that's good for this setting or not. It's just a tiny reference so I assume it's fine.

The answer is

Spoiler

Magical Starsign for the DS. The first game in the series was Magical Vacation on the GBA. Each magician has a little chant they do when they use Story mandated Field Magic. Picky used the first two lines from Pico's chant.

 

[nice ping]

Here's my first attempt at writing an actual omake. Enjoy. Or don't, if the quality isn't good. If it isn't, tell me so I can improve on it later.

Spoiler: Omake: Mirror of Possibilities

Mirror of Possibilities​

Ever since you've parted ways with Lier, that mirror sat on your table.

It is honestly kind of insane you even considered bringing it home, and not just smashing it back then, but…

Lier, despite him digging out the tunnel all by himself, was still just some guy thinking he'll be the treasure hunter, someone who grew up without really growing up. Someone ignorant of what it really meant to be a treasure hunter, even though, ironically enough, he was successful in finding a treasure, underneath his house at that.

When he touched the mirror, he changed. He was still Lier. Same name, same face, same… mild lack of lucidness, for the lack of better word.

Thing is, he wasn't Lier the Treasure Hunter. He was Doctor Agerate, a professor of archaeology, who was just in a middle of exploring ruins of "La-Mulana". He tried to explain it, and mentioned some "Mother", and "La-Mulana" being amalgamation of ruins all over the planet, and also supposedly being a birthplace of all civilizations? You didn't quite get it, and he didn't quite get it either, which is why he was exploring it in the first place.

You can't exactly compare the two, but the crows that nearly pecked your eyes out got easily swatted out of the sky with a whip by him, which was an impressive display of skill, which was quickly overshadowed by him jumping roughly five meters up to finish off a crow that tried to escape.

Fortunately, with some experimentation, you two learned that the process could be reverted, bringing Lier the Treasure Hunter back, and sending Prof back to continue exploring those ruins.

Which is why this mirror sits in your room now. You might've felt a bit bad about taking it from Lier, but apparently he forgot about this whole swapping incident happening after finding some tablet in that same tunnel you found the mirror in, and when you asked about the mirror, he told you that you could keep it.

(It occurred to you that your misgivings regarding Lier's capabilities as a treasure hunter might not be justified)

You…

You have a rough idea of what the mirror does, after discussing it with Prof. It swaps around the person touching the mirror with their counterpart from alternative timeline. And considering that he is probably stronger than his original (if this word is applicable at all – nothing says that you have to be the original), it makes sense that you should try and find stronger version of yourself to fight Giygas.

And yet, you hesitate, and for a good reason.

You're afraid of losing yourself. You wrote down some instructions, and discussed it with Buzz-Buzz (who thought it was a terrible idea to test this thing out and tried to talk you out of this), but what if alternative-you doesn't want to swap back? What if she's a complete bitch and will try to hurt your siblings?

But survival of a human race is on a line. Sometimes you just got to take the risks. Plus, you've got Buzz-Buzz on standby, and he'll step in if necessary.

You take a deep breath, bracing yourself, before you touch the mirror.

Floating in space, you see constellations full of colourful stars, all shining brightly.

And just as you notice one star in particular starting to shine more brightly than the rest, you heard sound of glass shattering, and felt yourself being pulled back. This sensation of being pulled back was enough for you to pull your hand from the mirror as well, and immediately, you could tell that something changed, and yet it didn't.

"I am still me.", you say to reassure Buzz-Buzz, who was anxiously waiting, ready to restrain your potential alternative version and force them to touch the mirror. "I know something changed, and yet I can't quite tell what did."

"Well, your attire changed, if it helps?", he said. You look down, inspecting your new change in attire.

Something in your head clicks when you see a striped blue-and-yellow t-shirt. When you realize you don't hold your old cracked baseball bat, but a new one, which feels perfect, like it belongs in your hand, another puzzle piece goes where it belongs.

Finally, you take off a baseball cap you just realized you were wearing now.

It was red.

The floodgates in your head open, and you grin. The memories of other Cass pour in, filling you in on details of who she was, and what she did.

How she left her house late at night, when the meteor crashed, and found Buzz-Buzz. Her embarking on a quest to save the world, first, with only Buzz-Buzz at her side, but slowly joined by Paula, Jeff, Pu, and many others. How she fought Sanctuary Guardians, slowly growing in power, stopping zombies, cults, and brainwashing statues. How she met Mr. Saturns, Dr. Andonuts, Apple Kid, and many other individuals—

You stop grinning once you start learning of other things she went through.

How Buzz-Buzz died, trying to protect them until the end. How Eagle Quarter slowly turned into a shithole on-par with the rest of the City due to Giygas's influence. How she and others had to transfer their consciousness into robot bodies, because Phase Distorter would kill them otherwise. How she and others confronted Giygas and that little shit Porky. How Giygas turned into that thing, which was so alien and incomprehensible to human mind that you cannot describe it with words.

And how she spent her last moments laying on the ground, her robot body crumbled and broken, celebrating victory over Giygas, mourning Paula, Jeff and Pu, and lamenting the fact she wouldn't get to see her mother or siblings one last time.

It's a lot to take in. In fact, you're unsure how much of what you learned from Other Cass's struggles could apply to this timeline. But even if it turns out every bit of possible information you learned from her was garbage, which was nigh-impossible, considering sheer amount of coincidences across two timelines, you still had one ace up your sleeve – you still inherited her psychic prowess.

"Buzz-Buzz. I don't know how this swap thing works, but we have to talk.", you say, turning to him. He was still silent, waiting for you to say anything while you sorted through Other Cass's memories. "Because I've learned a lot information in the span of the past minute. And all of it is extremely important."

Giygas won't know what hit him.

Spoiler: Omake A/N

A/N: What if Cass found Glass Mirror, and by sheer chance got a glimpse of a world where Ness!Cass already saved the world? I probably overlooked something, or straight up got it wrong, so if I did, sorry, its getting late.

I briefly contemplated trying to make a charsheet for Ness!Cass, but it would just be "Stats: High to Yes", with high-tier Earthbound (and crossover) items in inventory, so I decided against doing so.

 

[griffinlw]

Spoiler: Dreams of a Distant Psychic (Omake)

... Strange. It's been a long time since something like this has happened to me. I didn't startle you did I? If I did I guess I should apologize. I didn't mean to barge in on your dreams like that.

Yeah I said dreams, you're asleep right now, and so am I. That's one of my abilities, though it's one of the few I can't really control. We're stuck right now, but once one of us wakes up the connection will break and everything will be back to normal.

Normal people can't see me or hear me when I do this, but you can. Are you special in some kind of way? I know you can hear me but you can't really talk back to me. Maybe if I try reading your mind?

...Ah, that would explain it. You're psychic too. Freshly awakened in fact. That would explain how we connected from so far away. I've never reached all the way to that side of Eagle Quarter before. Your area of effect and mine just happened to intersect and it brought us together. Strange how things work out sometimes huh? That might explain why you can't talk either. You're still new to this, so your powers are relatively weak for now.

Hmm... why don't you try reading my mind? You just need to reach out with your mind. Listen and feel for something that you've never heard or felt before. Your powers are extrasensory, so it should feel different somehow. Sorry if that doesn't make much sense, I forget how I read my first mind since I learned how when I was young. Focus, and reach out.



See? I knew you could do it! Ah, it was difficult for you though wasn't it? That's fine, I'll keep talking then so you don't have to strain yourself. Although I hope you don't mind that I may have to read your mind a few times if I ask any questions.

I guess the first thing I want to ask is this. Are you happy with your lot in life? Do you wake up every morning feeling full and fulfilled? Sorry to start off with such a big question but, I need to know.

...

That's fair. It's your life, after all, you're the best one to judge it. I'm not really happy with my lot in life, at least not all of it. I guess I can't complain too much though. Maybe I should have led with an easier topic. How about we talk about our powers?

As far as I remember I always had my powers, or at least I did when I was 6 or so. I've kept them secret all this time, no one knows but the man I trust most in the world. At first, it was all small stuff, the ability to read minds and pick up small objects. As I got older it evolved a bit, I could conjure threatening images to scare and confuse people, and I could heal people's injuries by causing them to forget their own pain. I can even teleport away from danger, although I never knew where I would land.

When people first think about gaining powers, about being superhuman or an Esper they think about all the things they could do and fights they could win. They never think about the downsides or the potential consequences. Since I learned how to read minds I've never been successfully lied to. I can hear every cruel thought of people on the street who think I'm a thuggish punk. When someone tries to cheer me up or say it isn't that bad I can see through them to see the truth. Part of being psychic means being able to see through the veils people put up, but some of those are there for a reason.

Sorry, didn't mean to get preachy. It's just rare when I can talk to someone who gets it, you know? Maybe I should stop picking the topics of conversation. If you have any questions, think about them and I'll read your mind.

Who am I? Good question. I'm not too keen on the idea of giving my name up but... you're like me. I think I can trust you. My name is Akira Tadokoro. I'm psychic just like you. I have a younger sister who's cute and kind, but she gets sick really easily and I worry about her a lot. She worries about me too, since I get in fights so often. You could say that I'm a troubled child, although who isn't these days?

I live in an orphanage, no way around that. I'm like the big brother of all the little squirts that live there. When people pick on them I go pick fights for them, if they get hurt I walk over with a bandaid and a little hypnotherapy to make sure they don't cry. I have a part-time job at a takoyaki stand for a little pocket change and to help make ends meet. Taeko is our caretaker and she's really nice, although she seems to forget that I'm not a kid anymore. I can drive a motorcycle and have a part-time job, but she still scolds me like I'm a kid with a hand in the cookie jar.

I have a big brother named Matsu, although some people call him Lawless. We're not related by blood but I'm sure he loves me like a brother. He owns the takoyaki stand that I work at sometimes. He's the only person I've ever told about my powers, he told me to keep a lid on them and keep them secret, but also that they would be important somehow. Ah... looks like I'm going to be waking up soon, so this little conversation is almost over. Got any more questions for me?

... I'm not sure if we'll be able to talk again like this. Don't get me wrong it was nice and I'd love to but this was just a spur-of-the-moment thing, I'm not sure if it can be repeated. You might not even remember that we had this talk in the morning. Plus you still can't talk back to me and I'm sure that is getting very, very annoying.

Meeting in person is even more unlikely. Your home town is very, very far away from mine and I can say for sure I have no reason to head that way. Still... it would be interesting to meet another psychic in person.

Before I go... there's something weird going on where I am. I don't know why or how but people seem to be acting irrationally. Or maybe it is rational, but only to them. Gangs and people picking fights, animals going violent. I hope that it's safer where you are.

The last thing I want to say, as one psychic to another is this. Stay safe and good luck with whatever it is you're doing. You can change the world, even if the impact is small. So don't give up, no matter how hard it gets.

Good Night. I hope we can meet again someday.

Spoiler: Notes

Live A Live originally came out on the Super Famicom which is pretty much adjacent to the Super Nintendo and the 4th generation of consoles. It consists of 7 different chapters that have different themes, protagonists, gameplay styles, and so on. Akira comes from the Near Future chapter and is a psychic street punk in a vaguely sci-fi scenario where things like advanced robotics are a work in progress. At the start of his scenario, he pokes his head into the fourth wall and stares into your soul, asking you a few questions and teaching you about his power.
What I'm saying is that this boy is like, EarthBound/Mother adjacent in almost every way. Important mother figure, sibling relationships, psychic powers, although he's definitely a bit more violent than the average Mother protag.

I don't want to spam Omakes but this one struck me and I absolutely had to do it. I'm a pretty erratic writer so I'll probably go through dry spells sometimes, and other times I'll be slapping down two or more of these bad boys when inspiration strikes

 

[griffinlw]

Spoiler: Picky Goes To The Hospital (Omake)

It happened on his way back home from the hill, after he fought that snake. He felt an itch on his arm that got more and more annoying the farther he walked. It didn't really hurt, but it got pretty annoying. So eventually he stopped to take a look at it.

Ick…

It wasn't that bad honestly, definitely not as bad as the time he tripped and fell on a nail. But he still didn't like the look of the slowly swelling bump on his arm and the teensy tiny bit of blood on it.

Not a big deal really, he'd just run home, steal a bandaid from the medicine cabinet, and drink some lemonade. Once he was bandaged and hydrated he'd run off and continue playing for the day.

Although it was weird he had an injury in the first place. All he did was walk, climb a few trees, fight a snake…

Oh.

The first iotas of worry started to seep into Picky as he considered the implications. Animal bites were definitely a step above the average injuries. You could get sick, especially if the animal had some kind of disease.

Picky cautiously examined the wound, an uncharacteristically worried look on his face as he examined it from multiple angles. There was only one little puncture that was bleeding. But weren't snakes supposed to have two fangs?

Maybe it missed and only one of the fangs got me? Picky wondered

Porky would know. Picky took off at a run towards his house. At least I hope he does, because I really, really don't want to ask Mom or Dad.

When Picky arrived back at his house, Porky was standing outside doing… something. Birdwatching maybe? He had a bunch of rocks in one hand, and the other was hanging limply by his side. There sure did seem to be a lot of crows outside now that he thought about it.

"I have a question," Picky announced as he slid to a stop beside his brother.

"What is it?" Porky's eyes didn't leave the crows, which appeared to be flying around in a big mob. Seemed a little odd.

"Theoretically if someone was bitten by a snake, how bad would that be?" Picky wasn't going to just come out and say he got bitten by a snake. Porky would absolutely use it as gossip if he felt like it.

"Well, it depends on the snake of course. But in general?" Porky turned to Picky with a wicked smile. "Snakes have huuuuge fangs that leave big puncture wounds like you got stabbed with a knife! And most of them are venomous too! All it takes is one little bite, and whatever they bit is going to die sooner or later."

"Oh." Cold dread quickly pierced the entirety of Picky's soul "You don't say."

"Yeah, snakes are pretty wicked. If Mom and Dad ever let us have a pet I might like one." Porky said, turning his eyes back on the crows.

"Hey, I'm gonna… go to town real quick. Bye!" Picky took off at a dead sprint.

"Huh. Wonder what's up with up with him." Porky waited until Picky was out of sight to pull out his slingshot. His eyes narrowed in concentration as he took aim at one of the crows and restarted his target practice.

But this story isn't about him so let's move on.

By the time Picky's feet hit the sidewalks of Onett he was out of breath and had to slow down. Unfortunately, the hospital was on the other side of Onett, so he still had a ways to go.

He crossed the street and ran past the town hall. Without bothering to look he ran across the street again, causing an angry driver to honk at him.

"Sorry!" Picky spun around to apologize and turned back to keep running-

WHAM

"Oof!" Picky hit the ground hard, dazed and out of breath.

"Hey watch where you're going punk!" Picky cracked open his eyes to see a Skate Punk in front of him, quickly bending over to retrieve his skateboard before glaring at Picky through his goggles. "You made me wipe out!"

"Sorry, I'm in a hurry," Picky said, trying to pick himself off the ground.

"Sorry isn't gonna cut it! I was riding along doing tricks until you came along and messed me up." The skater put his board on the ground and got ready to charge into Picky with it.

"I really need to get through! I got bit by a snake and I think I'm dying!" Picky screwed up his face like he was crying and showed the Skate Punk his arm.

He wasn't really crying, but the Skate Punk didn't need to know that.

"Oh… yeah that sucks. Uh…" The Skate Punk awkwardly rubbed the back of his helmet, looking more uncomfortable than anything. "I'll let you off the hook, but just this once! The hospital's right there."

"Thanks, I'm sorry for making you wipe out!" Picky ran off before the Punk could change his mind.

"Did you just let that kid go?" The Skate Punk looked back to see a Pogo Punk with his arms crossed.

"Look, he was having a bad day, he got bit by a snake and he thinks he's dying. I signed up for a little anarchy, not because I'm a monster. You're just mad because his brother slugged you with a slingshot."

"Am not!" The Pogo Punk retorted

"Am too!" The Skate Punk and Pogo Punk locked eyes before each of them boarded their favorite mode of transportation and prepared to duke it out.

But this story isn't about them so let's move on.

Picky almost ran directly into the hospital doors before he slowed down and let the automatic doors catch up. As soon as he was in the lobby he called out, "I need to see a doctor it's urgent!"

"I'm sorry sweetie he has a patient with him. You'll have to wait a few minutes" The woman at the front desk explained.

"Oh. Okay." Picky sat down in the lobby to wait.

This is already boring.

He started picking through the magazines in the lobby. He didn't understand why Dad found this stuff so fascinating. There were magazines about wildlife, stuff about machinery, ads for jobs, and stuff. He didn't get why his dad liked the magazine about swimsuits so much. It wasn't like swimming was common in Onett, and he didn't even look at the swimsuits for guys.

After an hour (15 minutes) the patient left and Picky was allowed to go see the doctor.

*sigh* "Hello young man what seems to be the problem?" The tired-looking doctor turned to Picky


"I got bitten by a snake and I think I'm dying!" Picky yelled, all in one breath.

The Doctor stuttered in place, apparently surprised to have such an easy explanation. "Well, that should be easy enough to solve. The hospital has plenty of antidotes, can you tell me what kind of snake it was?"

"A Coil Snake."

"A what?"

"A Coil Snake! You know, it was coiled up like a spring." Picky explained.

The doctor stared at him for a total of 5 seconds, his face growing steadily redder before the dam burst. "Young man, that's something almost all snakes do! It's a defensive position to make themselves appear larger. Calling a snake a 'coil snake' means absolutely nothing!"

"Oh." Picky said dumbly.

"Now let's try that again. What color was the snake? Was it thin or thick? About how long was it" The doctor asked.

"Er- It was green, thick I suppose, and it was a little longer than I am tall."

"Young man, you've just described the Onett Kingsnake." The Doctor said, his expression going flat.

"Y-you have the antidote for that right?" The Doctor's expression didn't change. "I-I'm not gonna die am I?"

"No." The doctor said bluntly. "Because The Onett Kingsnake isn't venomous at all."

"B-but aren't snakes-?"

"No not all snakes are venomous!" The Doctor shouted out, seeming enraged by Picky's ignorance. "The Onett Kingsnake is a nonvenomous constrictor snake. It's called a kingsnake because it kills and eats other snakes! That's the reason why Onett has such a mild snake population, the kingsnakes keep out all of the dangerous venomous snakes."

"You know a lot about animals don't you?"

"I wanted to be a vet. My mother convinced me that there was more money to be had in being a doctor." The doctor explained, looking briefly pained before he looked back to Picky. "Also, you haven't even shown me where the "bite" is."

"Oh right. It's right here." Picky held out his arm, and the doctor examined it, sweeping his eyes over the raised bump and the single bleeding puncture wound on Picky's arm. He slowly looked up at Picky, his eyes half shut with disbelief.

He turned around, walked over to his tools, and scooped one up at random, he returned, grabbing hold of Picky's arm with one hand and using the tool in the other. For a brief moment, Picky felt a tight pinch, before the doctor held out the pair of tweezers to where Picky could see.

"This is a splinter." The doctor said, slowly turning the wooden nail so Picky could see it. "You came running to the hospital, and got an appointment with me, because of a splinter? How did you even get it?"

"Well, I did fight the snake with a wooden stick. I guess while I was flailing it around I got a splinter?" Picky said cautiously. The doctor was starting to worry him.

*Sigh* "Well, everything is fine. The splinter has been removed, and you're otherwise in perfectly good health." The doctor looked exhausted. "Now then, I can't charge you for any medicine since you didn't take any, but there's still the consultation fee to consider."

"Consultation fee?" Picky slowly stood up, carefully placing his hands in his pocket.

"As a doctor, my time is very valuable, and you have wasted a great deal of it. The consultation fee is $25" The doctor leaned forward, hands folded in front of him as he stared at Picky.

"Oh. Uh." Picky's mind raced. How did he get out of this exactly? "I don't have any money on me but my Dad is in the waiting room. I'll go get him!"

Picky turned and ran before the doctor could even get up from his chair, bursting through the door and running away as fast as his little legs could take him.

"More money than a vet she said…" The doctor stared forlornly at the open door before sitting back at his desk, and reaching under it for some 'self-medication'

Which is to say a big bottle of scotch.

But the story isn't about him, so let's leave it at that.

Spoiler: Notes

A little continuation of Picky getting into trouble. Picky is a funky little guy who actually tries to help Ness in Earthbound the one time you fight an enemy with him by your side, but he's also younger than Ness and Porky and doesn't do much after that. I could see him being scrappy and stupid enough to get into any number of scrapes.

I tried to continue the trend of Porky's family enraging animals with Porky shooting crows with a slingshot. I don't think he ever does anything with a slingshot in the game, but the rest of Ness's crew can so why not him?

Technically Earthbound doctors aren't cruel enough to charge you for something you could cure yourself, or that they can't cure. They don't charge anything when Ness is homesick or when Ninten has Asthma. But in every other respect, they will make you pay up before they'll help you with whatever problem you have.

Also, I thought it was funnier that way.

For the character's colors, I picked the colors for the Pogo Punk and Skate Punk based on their outfits, and I had no idea what to do for the others so I either picked one at random or phoned a friend.

 

[The3rdCorinthian]

Once I sought to change the future. It was my greatest mistake.

From the moment that Maria and I were abducted on that day at Mt. Itoi, perhaps my destiny was set. How would I have ever learned of the nature of PSI, that power of ones consciousness? As a reporter, how could I not indulge my curiosity in that alien race?

Perhaps that is the reason I spent far less time with the alien child than Maria did. If only I had not been focused on the potential of such knowledge, perhaps what is to come could have been avoided. But I cannot change the past.

PSI is a power of Ego - the self, ones own desires of how the world ought to be spilling forth to dye reality their own colours. For a reporter such as myself, the form that power took was natural. Abilities to 'See the Truth', at the expense of the far more common skills such as healing, or psychokinesis.

I started with the simple skill of Spirit Photography. Conjuring forth images of places I had never been. Performing a supernatural act felt incredible, but it as not enough. Soon, I began looking into Psychometry, reading an objects history through touch. I even tapped into a minor form of Telepathy.

Then the Dreams began.

The cloying darkness, the screams of billions. I knew these dreams were a premonition, but of what? Something terrible, but could I somehow avert it?

For whatever reason my captors would not allow me to inquire further. Perhaps they had foreseen some of what would happen, and were trying to protect Maria's adopted child. Perhaps they knew this tragedy would not affect them. Or perhaps they rightly feared the realm I explored.

The Dreamlands.

When I stole my captors technology and escaped there through my Magicant, I saw terrible things. Trees that dream of forests where none shall ever walk. Stormclouds that glare down with human eyes at their core. Worst, that horrifying, flesh coloured blob, that endless void bearing a terrifying childish innocence.

It is a maddening place. But there within, I saw the future clearly... and realised the fool I am.

I see an armada that blots out the sky. Our Mother, Earth, vanishes and the universe cares not.

I see a dark city that seeks to devour the horizon.

I see my great grandsons journey, and the hardships my folly will bring upon him.

I see the Child, Giygas, warped into something I cannot comprehend, having forgotten love. Four children, three boys and a girl, battle against the darkness.

When I escaped, I resolved to truly change fate.

Despite everything, I have failed. The visions have continued.

Yet I try. Ninten will learn Maria's melody. Eve will assist him to Itoi's peak. The knowledge of PSI has been spread.

I still have hope.

My vision of the children has changed. Two girls, two in shadow. It is proof.

The future does not refuse to change.

Spoiler: A/N

The common knowledge of the Average PSI user having a horrifying premonition of things to come once an hour is wrong. PSI-er George, who had a Trillion visions in a relative time lasting 10 seconds, is an outlier, and should not have been counted.

More seriously, trying to give a reasonable reason for George to have kinda low key been responsible for literally every problem in the Mother series (which leads to the last vestiges of humanity being seduced by the fascism born of a psychopathic immortal manchild and the near total annihilation of everything, by the by) that explains why he'd risk doing something like that. All to the tune of some good old lovecraftian madness. Given this hits closer to the actual setting, It probably conflicts with what the author had in mind, but I wanted to get the idea out of my head.

I also challenged myself to try to write it under 500 words, which is why it's pretty short. but honestly, there wasn't that much meat to this, so it's a decent challenge to get me to try writing more while reducing the amount of dead-weight. Don't think I perfectly succeeded, but I think I did better than I was expecting.

 

[nice ping]

Initially intended as an omake, I kind of ran out of steam, so I guess its a mini-omake/brief exploration of a concept now? Or maybe three mini-omakes in a trenchcoat? Either way, enjoy, or don't.

Spoiler: Introduction and A/N

Specialized 'Kinetic' users can only learn one element, and thus are barred from learning any PSI that isn't related to that element. It could be that we would have an element of "Ice", learning PK Freeze and PSI Shield. It could be that we would have some other element, the one that we couldn't acquire in the games: say, PK Water and PSI LifeUp/Healing.

But should we really be restricted to just these classic elements? Why don't we go further? Explore, what could be if Cass would've acquired an esoteric element by going down the path of Kinetic PSI user?

Elements that show up in this omake/mini-omake: Star, Gravity, Karma.
- Star: Wishing Star is the most obvious technique I could think of that one could obtain from such an element, though Starstorm or even Meteor Strike might be something Cass of this timeline might've end up capable of performing. Imagine just smacking a Kraken with a meteor, that'd be fun
- Gravity: After I wrote this, I realized that Gravity was a bit too strong for an Alpha, but I decided to keep it in, mostly because "it is funny"
- Karma: Based off karmic gates in Rainworld, which required you to have certain karma level to pass, which means that Cass has to have certain karma level to be able to use high-end PSI techniques of her element. Even basic technique is something she can't use yet

Other elements I considered: "Time", "Void", "Blood", "Metal", and maybe a comedic one. I will probably continue at least one of these "timelines" - the one with element of "Star" in particular is interesting to me.

Spoiler: Kinetic Something

"Singular element feels right. Though the element itself…"

You snap your fingers. At first, nothing happened, but then a golden light poured over the area, and you felt rejuvenated, as if you didn't just expend all of your psionic power on some super technique.

And then you instinctively look up, and see, for just a second, a streak of golden light travel through the sky. It reminded you of simpler times, when you made wishes upon seeing falling stars, still believing all that wishing star crap. Buzz-Buzz noticed it as well.

C.D. has learned PSI Wishing Star.
Functionally similar to Wish, this technique has a random effect each time it is used. One of said effects is complete rejuvenation of HP and PP. Experiment more to find out other effects.​

"If that's going to happen each time I use my PSI, I think someone is out to notice it eventually." you say, getting back up.

"Not really. Avoiding using it in public aside, as long as your PSI doesn't attract or create a celestial body large enough to be considered a threat by the satellites, I think it should be fine." disagreed Buzz-Buzz. "Still… I have never seen this element before."

/-/-/-/ Switching Timelines /-/-/-/​

"...It is mine now. Take it from me, if you dare–"

"PK Gravity α"​

A giant gray ant blocked your way. If you were a twelve-year old, maybe it would be more intimidating, considering it is taller than Kart is, but as it is, after going through this cave and having to fight a bunch of overgrown insects and slugs, you were tired and in no mood for dealing with its theatrics.

Immediately, the ant collapsed, pinned down to the ground by gravity, but you didn't stop there.

"PK Gravity α"​

And then, the ant got slammed into the cave's ceiling. Someone might have let the gravity take its course, and not hijack it to make its fall even more painful.

That someone wasn't you, though.

"PK Gravity α"​

Afterwards, it was a child's play to make sure it stayed down, considering it didn't even try fighting back once you started to whack it with your bat.

"Well, that was easy." you say. Just as you were about to step over it and check what "Sanctuary" it was trying to claim for itself, you took a second look at the ant, just in case it was just waiting for a moment to attack you.

…Huh. Maybe you really did go a little overboard.

/-/-/-/ Switching Timelines /-/-/-/​

"So how does my element even work? Does it mean it gets stronger the shittier the person I'm fighting is?"

"It could be. Sorry that I can't be of any help. I don't think we have anything resembling a concept of Karma, which might make you the first PSI user of that element."

"And as the first user, this means that there isn't anyone to show me the ropes." you conclude.

You can't even test your if it works better on shitty people. While there is no shortage of people you wouldn't mind beating up, actually doing so without attracting attention is problematic at best and nigh-impossible at worst... At least you can still practice your PSI technique, even if you can't exactly test your theory of how it works.

With that said and done, you focus on a big rock, and close your eyes.

"PSI Karm--"​

You're not even halfway there when an initial urge to stop turns into an outright demand to stop. Knowing better than to push your luck, you stop, and the halfway formed circle around the rock dissipates into the thin air.

You think you know what happened. The same way you knew that your element was Karma, or how to pull off that PSI technique the first time around. Since your element is Karma it is only natural that your own karma is involved as well. And it seems like in order to use your PSI, you'll have to have a certain amount of it. And right now, your "karmic balance" was a little short.

There just had to be a catch, huh?

 

[Brightflame]

Birds of a Feather
​

Your whole body hurts

You were on your knees, your prized baseball bat being used to prop you up was the only thing stopping you from kissing the concrete.

Meanwhile, the culprits surrounded you, laughing, jeering at your pain. Grinning like their namesake when there's blood in the water.

"Tch…I knew the Sharks were thugs, but I didn't take you guys to be cowards too." You spat out venomously. "What. Were you afraid I'd kick all of your asses in a fair fight, so you jumped me instead?"

Bastards…all you were doing was walking home when suddenly they came out from the alleyways, battering you with their fists and whatever crude weapons they had. You fought back of course, but with the odds stacked against you as they were, you had no chance in a 7 to 1.

One stepped forward; a teen boy your age wearing a Shark bandanna and some ugly shades. In his hands he twirled a golf club.

"We don't play by anyone's rules besides our own, missy." He said in a voice that you would expect more from a 50 year old chain-smoker, "and all is fair in love and war!"

"The fuck do you guys even want? I didn't do shit to you guys!"

"Maybe not." He agrees as he leans on the club, "...but you know something we want to know, and now that you know we mean business, we'll ask ya nicely."

"Tell us…where's that damn treehouse?"

"...Piss off, I don't know anything about that."

"Bullshit!" He snarls at you, "We saw you following that dweeb in the baseball cap earlier! We know you know, and if you won't tell us…well, we'll get a little less polite." He scowled, "So…what will it be?"

…This was bad. You weren't in any shape to fight and Buzz-Buzz wasn't here to help. You could heal yourself with PSI but…should you infront of so many witnesses?

Dammit! Well, you know one thing for certain.

"Go fuck off back behind Fankie's coattails!" You say defiantly, "I'm telling you jackshit!"

The leader looked at you with fury for a moment, before receding to make way for a savage grin.

"Is that so…jeez, what is with people these days, not knowing what's best for them?" He sighed as he raised his golf club in the air, "no matter…a bit more roughing up will change your tune."

The club goes down and you clench your eyes shut to prepare for the pain to come.

*WHACK!*

a cry of pain rings out into the air.

…but it wasn't your own.

You opened your eyes to see the Sharks' leader clutching their now broken nose as blood flowed freely from it as his minions looked on in shock. But that was secondary to what was in front of you.

For now a girl stood between you and the leader, facing away from you as she faced the delinquents. You couldn't see her face, but her hair was bright orange, bundled into a tasteful ponytail. Her outfit looked like a school uniform, a blue blazer and a purple skirt. Her stance was strangely laxed, but something told you she was anything but.

"You…YOU BITCH!" The leader screamed in rage, forgetting his broken nose as blood flowed still. "How DARE you interfere with our business!? Who the hell even are you!?"

"Hmmmm~" this mystery girl hummed, "...I don't think you need to know what, just that I'm the one who is going to be whooping all of your butts for ganging up on a girl like this." She begins to stretch her arms as if she was warming up for an exercise, instead of being surrounded by several hostile goons like she was.

"I mean…seriously? That's like, totally lame! If you know what's good for you, how about you blow back to total bumsville before I teach you a lesson about being pathetic jerks!"

"What did you say!?" The leader shouted as he began to run towards the girl, his club raised into the air. "Know your place, bitch! I'll teach YOU to respect the Sharks!" In his rage, he seemed to have forgotten about you, now his wrath is focused entirely on the newcomer.

Big mistake.

Pushing through the pain, you pick yourself off the ground. By the time you did so, the leader was close and ready to swing at the girl, who showed no signs of blocking or even changing her stance.

She wouldn't have to, for you swung your own bat at the leader's chest, reminding him of your existence as he is knocked to the ground with a howl of pain.

The girl turned towards you in surprise and you saw her face, blue eyes meeting sapphire. "Wow, you're up already? Are you alright?"

"Yeah…" you reply as you get into a fighting stance, "...And you can now piss off. This is my fight, not yours."

That, and you didn't really want a goodie two-shoes getting hurt trying to help you.

She blinks before smiling, "Wellll, I think I'm a bit too deep to back out now, so how about we compromise and beat them together, sound fair?"

You give a small scowl, but turn towards the remaining Sharks, all of whom are now readying themselves for a fight. "...Fine, but you better not blame me for any scrapes you get."

The mystery girl smirks as she turns her attention to the Sharks as well, "Likewise, but I don't think that will be an issue between the two of us. Now let's teach these chumps a lesson!"

***************

You're breathing heavily, but you're still standing.

Which is more than you could say to the guys you just fought, each and every one of them were sprawled on the ground (or in a nearby dumpster in the case of one), collectively groaning in pain.

…Maybe you went too overboard?

…Nah, they jumped you, so they deserved anything that was coming to them.

"So these are the kinds of punks that live around here, huh…what's their deal anyways?" The mystery girl asked, looking down at the Sharks' fallen forms, apparently unimpressed.

You shrug, "Not from around here? They've been a pain around these parts for a good while…though this is the first time they targeted me. Idiots."

…Now comes the hard part.

"...Uh, thanks for the help there, by the way." You manage to say.

Why was it so hard for you to say 'thank you' you will never understand.

The girl opened her mouth to respond, probably to say something like 'no need to thank me!' or 'I only did what was right!' as all goodie two-shoes say.
…If her stomach didn't take that moment to interrupt her with one loud growl.

Silence reigned for a few moments after as you two stared at each other, the girl growing more flustered in each passing moment.

"I know!" she suddenly says, "How about you thank me by showing me a good place to grab a bite to eat around here?"

You couldn't help but snort, "Sure, sure. Follow me, I know a pretty good pizza place."

***************

Around 10 minutes of walking and 5 minutes of ordering later, you two sat along the curb outside Machs Pizza; a perfect slice of Pepperoni Lover's pizza in both of your hands.

You enjoyed the masterpiece slowly as one should, but the mystery girl must have been starving as she was eating it like it was ambrosia from the Gods themselves…or maybe she just never had a proper pizza before, you could see someone like that reacting the same way to the greasy delicacy of dough and cheese.

"Ahhh~" she sighs after she finishes off her slice, "That really hit the spot, definitely beats the pizza joints i've been to before!"

You suppose this would be a good time to ask a question that's been weighing on your mind.

"...Why did you help me back there? You didn't have any reason to, so why?"

The girl tilts her head, "Why not? I was just hanging out on a nearby roof when I noticed you being in that tight spot to the left of me, so I jumped down to help. Isn't it normal to lend a hand in situations like that?"

You snort as you shake your head, "Not here it isn't, though I guess that also explains how you suddenly appeared out of nowhere."

…Wait

You look at the mystery girl, "...You said I was 'to your left'? But that means you jumped down from the right, and the building there was several stories tall."

She tilts her head further, "...What about it?"

You blink before slowly shaking your head and turning away from this maniac "...You know what, nevermind."

"Okay!"

Silence reigns for a few more moments as you finish your own slice.

"...Soooo…"

"...What?"

"...What's your name?"

…Oh…huh, you only realize now that you haven't actually made introductions yet.

"...Cass" You say, "Most people around here call me 'CD' though."

At least when they aren't cursing you out for something you are only occasionally at fault for.

"'CD'? Like, the disc?"

You roll your eyes, "Yeah, exactly like that."

"I see! Nice to meet you then, CD-San!"

"CD…'San'?" You repeat, clearly confused as the meaning of the addition is lost to you. It sounded familiar, but you couldn't quite put your finger on it…you think you heard something like that in one of those cartoons your sister likes?

"Ah, right, I guess you guys wouldn't use honorifics."

"'Honor fics? Wha-"

She waves a hand, "Don't worry about it. Anyways, I'm Kyoko and I'm from River City! It's nice to meet you!"

Kyoko…

"Kyoko huh…you're Japanese then?"

Kyoko scratches her head, "...I guess?"

"...You guess."

She shrugs, "I mean, my family was from Japan, but that doesn't really mean much to me outside history classes…which I mostly sleep through anyways. River City was always my home." She pauses, "...Well, I guess until now that is."

You guess that makes sense. You can't say you know much about what the rest of The City is like, but the classes you did bother to take did make it clear that the Eagle Quarter was unique in that it was almost entirely populated by settlers from a place called the 'USA', and that's why so many people here still consider themselves to be 'American' despite never seeing their homeland before it was crushed into dust. Many zones probably don't have the same origin story.

"So you're not just visiting? Did you just move here?"

Kyoko nods, "Yup! Mom was getting anxious about all the Syndicate guys around our old neighborhood, so she had a few of her old friends help us get a place here." her bright smile dims a little, "...It is a little bit of a bummer though, having to leave all my friends…"

"That would suck, yeah." You agree, "Well, for what it's worth, welcome to Onnet. The lamest town in the entire Quarter."

Kyoko frowns, "That doesn't sound like a nice thing to say about your hometown."

"I'm just being honest." You say bluntly, "The only thing worth a damn here is the Arcade really, but even that's been taken over by the Sharks too. It's only going to get worse too, thanks to the lockdown."

"What about the people?" Kyoko asks, "Are the people fun here at least?"

"Asking the wrong person for that." you reply

"You don't know?"

You give a small shrug, "I'm not 'popular' you could say, so I don't have alot of experience with the others here to say for sure."

"...Don't you have friends?"

"...Not really." You admit, "Fits me just fine though, people don't bother me, and I don't bother them…at least until today."

"...I see."

Kyoko gets up from the curb and clasps her hands together.

"Then it's settled." she proclaims with a beaming smile

You look up at her in slight confusion, "What is?"
She extends a hand out towards you, "I've decided you'll be my first friend in this town!"

…What

"What."

"...Unless you don't want to be friends." Kyoko says, but in a way so crestfallen that you almost feel guilty if you were to reject.

"Wha-No no no!" You quickly say, "I guess, I'm fine with it but…why? You only just met me and I told you I don't have the best rep around here. Hell, for all you could know, I could have started that fight earlier!"

Kyoko taps her chin, "I guess…but then you would be a bit of a dummy for taking on so many people at once, and I don't think you are."

"Geez, how kind of you."

"But even if I did, I also overheard that one guy his whole spiel about a treehouse anyways."

You think for a moment, "...You got me there, but still how can you be sure we would have anything in common at all!"

"Oh, that's easy!" Kyoko responds chipperly, "We already have plenty in common! For example, we both get into fights…"

"You've only seen me in a fight once."

"...we both can take a hit as well as we can send one out."

"...I will give you that."

"...We both like pizza."

"Okay, but who doesn't?"

"...And we're both cute girls!"

"...Okay, now you're begging me to hit you."

"Point is…" Kyoko continues on, "I think we're two birds of the same feather in a way, and birds of a feather stick together! So what do you say?"

God, this girl is starting to give you a headache, part of you wants to turn her down but…well, you do need allies for what's to come, and you've seen enough that Kyoko could be useful…yeah, those are the only reasons you're considering this.

"...Agh, fine!" You answer, "But only because you would probably bother me regardless if I said no."

"Alright!" Kyoko was practically glowing, "I gotta go now before my mom starts blowing up my phone, but how about we meet again this weekend?"

"Sure, but don't expect much."

She smiles still, "Okay then! I'll see you later, CD-San!"

And with that, she begins to walk away, waving back at you until she's far in the distance.

You are now alone at the curb, looking at the asphalt below.

"Why does it feel like I'm going to regret this?"

 

[Cathode]

Get N or Get Out
​

Spoiler: Get N or Get Out

Chester Phillips sat outside Mach Pizza, on its infamous step - watching the days go by. "Why isn't this place more interesting?" he mumbled to himself. "I mean, the least they could do is name the place Onett, instead of Onnet." It kind of ruined the theming, he thought to himself - watching those damned Annoying Crows flock overhead. "Still, better here than Threed." He looked through a dog-eared magazine - something about Power - as he hummed to himself. It's a shame that his uncle Howard got chased out of Fourside - he thought to himself.

The city life was way better than whatever's going on here. Too peaceful - though the Sharks are trying their best to liven things up - they practically had claim over the arcade last he checked. Reminded him of that ill-fated "Funky Bowling" business he did with some friends. He picked himself up, and started to walk along the streets - seeing buildings pass him by. "Well, enough complaining. Might as well see what they have in the Arcade." The place usually just had slot machines, but every so often; a new arcade machine would cycle in - brought in from bigger cities with booming commercial industries.

It was worth a check - he thought to himself - nearing the alleys near the buildings, which is of course, when a Pogo Punk slammed him into the wall. "What do you think you're doing here, huh, halfpint?" Chester gulped and buckled down. "The name's Nester to you, punk." The Pogo Punk let out an ugly grin, fabric over their face distorting; before they slammed their fist into Chester's face. He spat out blood, before reaching into a nearby trashcan.

Aha.

Perfect.

Chester slammed a days-old hamburger right into the Pogo Punk's face - before he took out his yo-yo, and took the opportunity to slip to the entrance of the alley. He could run, right now... but something was calling him to beat this guy into the dirt. He clenched his fist. He's gonna be just like his cousin Mike - he lets the yo-yo spin through the air, before... he coughed. "Knock knock." The Punk scrambled to wipe the old lettuce and patty off of their face. "Houston?" The Punk was confused - "Houston wh-"

SMAAAAAAAAAAAAASH!!!

Chester's yo-yo slammed into the Punk's chest, knocking them into the ground. "Houston? The dog has walked." He paused. "...man, now I understand why Uncle Howard isn't a fan of my jokes. That was terrible!" Chester returned the yo-yo to his hand, then his pocket, before walking back to the streets. He scratched his chin, looking around. "...y'know, the Sharks are jerks, but..." Chester sighed - leaving the rest unsaid. Still better than Pirkle or Strong. He stuck his hands in his pockets and walked home. He's had enough adventure for one day, and if he shows his face around the arcade; Frankie's gonna slice him up something bad.

Still, he's heard Beak Point is nice. Worst comes to worst, he can relax on the cliffs and take in the views. He shrugged. Better than nothing.

Spoiler: Author's Note

Decided to do an omake! This omake focuses on beloved Nintendo Power mascot and main character of obscure Virtual Boy game Nester's Funky Bowling - Nester. In this continuity, as the nephew of Howard Lincoln [a real-life Nintendo employee, you may also know him as the guy who co-stars alongside Nester in his Nintendo Power strip Howard & Nester], he ran a small amateur bowling group before being forced to move to Onett for reasons he's not entirely clear on himself. He just knows his uncle's acting weird. A couple neat facts that you might not have caught - there's a reference to the burger found right outside the Burger Shop in a trashcan in Onett; and you might notice that he references a "Mike". This is the protagonist of the StarTropics duology - Mike Jones!

I can only wonder what adventures that explorer's getting up to; but if I write about him, it'll be when we eventually get to Summers.