Valkur
The True Valkyria, Valkur!
- Location
- Fólkvangr
Omake - Part 2 of Raid - Varmja Vs. Slavery
So it's come to this a berserk Shield Maiden and female viking against the Crown Prince of the Kingdom of Ergard. Except instead of fighting against me he's wearing very very pristine white and blue clothing with a silver chain around his neck instead of plate armor. An instead of a sword or weapon he holds in his hand a minstrel.
This is anti-climatic and stupid.
I tied up the prince-ling and took him to our longboats as a captive. With him in my custody I could negotiate with our thane to have a larger percent of the loot and in exchange for capturing such an important noble. The only problem was though that he was not a Prince I thought would support the idea of well a Prince. He was average in looks and his military acumen was lacking in everything. He had no magic to call upon or any pet beasts. All he had was a minstrel that he insisted on playing. He was good with it but he was going to be more of a fool in front of my dumb brute lord than a respected man in that castle.
I knew the Thanes wife Edna adored mainland cultures and loved reading there poetry and maybe she could do something for the young lad. Although I doubt it since she's married and has no real influence outside of her fellow wives. Maybe if she finally found a champion to represent her but she never seems wanting to pick one. I always wondered what that lady does that so much more important than picking a champion to represent her? Maybe reading take a long time?
==============================
1 week later
We arrived back to the motherland in the City of Narshlan. Home of Thane Eros and the Jormgun Viking Band. The Jormgun were the most famous and pretentious vikings that their ever were. They had made there reputation on killing half of any land they raided and impregnating the other half like animals. There leader Jormag was known to have his own concubines despite not being an actual land holding lord. His only real function in court was to openly bribe the thane in exchange for immunity within the City. In other words, they're asses that need a great iron kick to get them.
I took the Prince to the Great Lodge without any robe to bind him since had insisted on being able to play on his minstrel to the court. I honestly didn't care as long as I could get another 2% on of the overall loot I didn't care about the last part. Although he was sorta cute with his optimism.
"I just know that I can get your Lord to release me. He would have had me killed if he was another type of man. I just need a song of oh hmmm."
"You should not think so highly of Thane Eros. He's known as "The Crude" for a reason and he could be mistaken for an Orc if it was not for his skin. Well that and his wife who seems to do the more 'Noble' work at the Lodge. If your going to sing she is the most likely to give you the thought of day."
"Ah! Perfect Lady Raider. I shall work her over to speak on my behalf and-"
"She has no power in this lodge Prince-Ling. You are going to have to get Eros to listen and he only respects might and less to poetic song from a Bard."
He seems to brim with confidence even still.
"But you have not heard what I can really do Lady Raider. I know how to sway this 'Crude' man by the end of the day you'll see!"
==================================
"GET OUT IF ME LODGE WIFF DA-"
"Now Lord Husband he's only trying to play a tune for us. The least you can do is listen."
"I ONLY LISTEN TO THE MANLY SONGS!
Besdies there is no great epic battle here no struggle. What is life without struggle?"
"Ahh but you see great Thane, that the ballad of Rummferdon is a description of a fair maidens love. A love he may not have unless he can woo her and convince her father to give him her hand in matrimony. Tis a dilema for a young man who so full of passion-"
"BORING!
I wann hear about a Knight punching a Dragon in the Throat and eating it's eggs to become a GOD!"
As I continue to see this banter go back and forth I can only sigh.
"Excuse me" I said politle in the halls as the Lord simply scoffs at the unconvinving Prince. They all ignored me though as I wasn't there despite being right behind them and brandishing the very same hand axes that helped give me the name of 'The bloody'. It was around then that I lost it.
"SHUT YOUR STUPID HOLES!" I growl audibly and shaking the confidence of all the drinkers including the Thane. "I wanted that 2% for the high value capture Thane."
"Fine fine. I'll have Rutford evaluate the full hoard and give you your winnings. Next time see what you can do about getting a more entertaining captive like a Templar, Cleric, or one of those legendary swordsmen from the mainlands. At least a better bard!"
"Sir if you would just allow me to play the whole thing fully than-"
An it was then that a large rock hit him on the back of the head. The young prince fell down and rubbed his head and even teared up a bit from the harm done to him. The culprit was none other than Jormag who laughed at the poor kid and bullied him with words. Guards quickly siezed the boy and took him away from the lodge fearing that the others would do far worse now that they smelled blood and weakness from the captive. If they killed him though than the Kingdom of Ergard would look for bloody vengeance and no ransom either. Not that Jormag's Band understood anything more than killing people that is. Or deodorant. Or trateing a woman. Not that I'd know at least.
As Jormag laughed I simply walked away as the beer kegs were tapped and food was handed out in large dinner plates. I went home that day and relaxed in my bed. A part of me feeling sorry for that poor kid and what he might be going through right now. Another part wanting to finally getting my last raid in succesfully and securing my retirement along with my sister. Everything was going to go according to plan and it felt nice.
At midnight though there was a knock on the door that woke me while my sister slept in a separate bed. As I grogily got up from my bed I picked up a knife near me my bed table an walked to the door. I looked through the peeking hole to see a robed figure looking around alone. It was definitely a woman and one with nice looking skin at that.
"Who comes so late to my door?"
"A woman of humility seeking a champion for Justice Varmja. Please allow me audience."
- To be continued
=============================
Part 3 will hopefully end my musings
So it's come to this a berserk Shield Maiden and female viking against the Crown Prince of the Kingdom of Ergard. Except instead of fighting against me he's wearing very very pristine white and blue clothing with a silver chain around his neck instead of plate armor. An instead of a sword or weapon he holds in his hand a minstrel.
This is anti-climatic and stupid.
I tied up the prince-ling and took him to our longboats as a captive. With him in my custody I could negotiate with our thane to have a larger percent of the loot and in exchange for capturing such an important noble. The only problem was though that he was not a Prince I thought would support the idea of well a Prince. He was average in looks and his military acumen was lacking in everything. He had no magic to call upon or any pet beasts. All he had was a minstrel that he insisted on playing. He was good with it but he was going to be more of a fool in front of my dumb brute lord than a respected man in that castle.
I knew the Thanes wife Edna adored mainland cultures and loved reading there poetry and maybe she could do something for the young lad. Although I doubt it since she's married and has no real influence outside of her fellow wives. Maybe if she finally found a champion to represent her but she never seems wanting to pick one. I always wondered what that lady does that so much more important than picking a champion to represent her? Maybe reading take a long time?
==============================
1 week later
We arrived back to the motherland in the City of Narshlan. Home of Thane Eros and the Jormgun Viking Band. The Jormgun were the most famous and pretentious vikings that their ever were. They had made there reputation on killing half of any land they raided and impregnating the other half like animals. There leader Jormag was known to have his own concubines despite not being an actual land holding lord. His only real function in court was to openly bribe the thane in exchange for immunity within the City. In other words, they're asses that need a great iron kick to get them.
I took the Prince to the Great Lodge without any robe to bind him since had insisted on being able to play on his minstrel to the court. I honestly didn't care as long as I could get another 2% on of the overall loot I didn't care about the last part. Although he was sorta cute with his optimism.
"I just know that I can get your Lord to release me. He would have had me killed if he was another type of man. I just need a song of oh hmmm."
"You should not think so highly of Thane Eros. He's known as "The Crude" for a reason and he could be mistaken for an Orc if it was not for his skin. Well that and his wife who seems to do the more 'Noble' work at the Lodge. If your going to sing she is the most likely to give you the thought of day."
"Ah! Perfect Lady Raider. I shall work her over to speak on my behalf and-"
"She has no power in this lodge Prince-Ling. You are going to have to get Eros to listen and he only respects might and less to poetic song from a Bard."
He seems to brim with confidence even still.
"But you have not heard what I can really do Lady Raider. I know how to sway this 'Crude' man by the end of the day you'll see!"
==================================
"GET OUT IF ME LODGE WIFF DA-"
"Now Lord Husband he's only trying to play a tune for us. The least you can do is listen."
"I ONLY LISTEN TO THE MANLY SONGS!
Besdies there is no great epic battle here no struggle. What is life without struggle?"
"Ahh but you see great Thane, that the ballad of Rummferdon is a description of a fair maidens love. A love he may not have unless he can woo her and convince her father to give him her hand in matrimony. Tis a dilema for a young man who so full of passion-"
"BORING!
I wann hear about a Knight punching a Dragon in the Throat and eating it's eggs to become a GOD!"
As I continue to see this banter go back and forth I can only sigh.
"Excuse me" I said politle in the halls as the Lord simply scoffs at the unconvinving Prince. They all ignored me though as I wasn't there despite being right behind them and brandishing the very same hand axes that helped give me the name of 'The bloody'. It was around then that I lost it.
"SHUT YOUR STUPID HOLES!" I growl audibly and shaking the confidence of all the drinkers including the Thane. "I wanted that 2% for the high value capture Thane."
"Fine fine. I'll have Rutford evaluate the full hoard and give you your winnings. Next time see what you can do about getting a more entertaining captive like a Templar, Cleric, or one of those legendary swordsmen from the mainlands. At least a better bard!"
"Sir if you would just allow me to play the whole thing fully than-"
An it was then that a large rock hit him on the back of the head. The young prince fell down and rubbed his head and even teared up a bit from the harm done to him. The culprit was none other than Jormag who laughed at the poor kid and bullied him with words. Guards quickly siezed the boy and took him away from the lodge fearing that the others would do far worse now that they smelled blood and weakness from the captive. If they killed him though than the Kingdom of Ergard would look for bloody vengeance and no ransom either. Not that Jormag's Band understood anything more than killing people that is. Or deodorant. Or trateing a woman. Not that I'd know at least.
As Jormag laughed I simply walked away as the beer kegs were tapped and food was handed out in large dinner plates. I went home that day and relaxed in my bed. A part of me feeling sorry for that poor kid and what he might be going through right now. Another part wanting to finally getting my last raid in succesfully and securing my retirement along with my sister. Everything was going to go according to plan and it felt nice.
At midnight though there was a knock on the door that woke me while my sister slept in a separate bed. As I grogily got up from my bed I picked up a knife near me my bed table an walked to the door. I looked through the peeking hole to see a robed figure looking around alone. It was definitely a woman and one with nice looking skin at that.
"Who comes so late to my door?"
"A woman of humility seeking a champion for Justice Varmja. Please allow me audience."
- To be continued
=============================
Part 3 will hopefully end my musings
