Hey General Pat,
This is excellent second chapter for the story. It lays out the basic workings of Taylor's powers.
I have high expectations for the interlude and the next few chapters. I am looking forward to reading more of this story.
Worst part was the multiple speakers in a single paragraph. Just kept popping up. A lot of people don't seem to mind it, but it's a bad personal peeve of mine. Takes you out of the story while you go back and re-read it with the correct speaker.
Hey General Pat,
This is excellent second chapter for the story. It lays out the basic workings of Taylor's powers.
I have high expectations for the interlude and the next few chapters. I am looking forward to reading more of this story.
Worst part was the multiple speakers in a single paragraph. Just kept popping up. A lot of people don't seem to mind it, but it's a bad personal peeve of mine. Takes you out of the story while you go back and re-read it with the correct speaker.
Going back and skimming the chapters, there's some of that in 1.1. I made sure to separate things when editing 1.2 but I guess I didn't do as good a job in 1.1. Thanks for the catch and your interest. I'll go fix 1.1 now.
So, if Skidmark and Squeeler are attacking the train yard and Conductor Taylor (just a suggestion...) picks them up, can she drop them off in the PRT parking lot? Or maybe into the bay?
And of course, a Hot Wheels Caddy in her drive way 😁
So, if Skidmark and Squeeler are attacking the train yard and Conductor Taylor (just a suggestion...) picks them up, can she drop them off in the PRT parking lot? Or maybe into the bay?
And of course, a Hot Wheels Caddy in her drive way 😁
Oh yes, a Hot Wheels Caddy in the driveway is just Taylor needs to complete her work for the day. Of course, such a thing would be guaranteed to her on the radar of the PRT/Protectorate.
Welcome to the first Interlude. This scene was the first to really begin solidifying in my head. It could have ended up as either a introduction or a flashback. I chose the latter as I felt it more important to introduce Taylor first. Now please enjoy a little POV from our friendly neighborhood halper.
Earth Cycle: Post-deployment flashback
On a dead alternate Earth, a great crystalline mass sat quietly fuming. [Queen Administrator] had been given orders she did not like. Following the end of the last Cycle, her progenitor had commanded her to cease using massed small critters to gather data. The [Warrior] felt that she had exhausted all data that she could gather in that manner and told her to use new methods.
The [Thinker] had agreed with her mate so [Queen Administrator] could do nothing but wait till the pair arrived at the next destination. She would have to analyze the host species there in order to determine new methods of data gathering. And she had been sure that the new planet would have had fascinating invertebrates to play with.
Then the [Thinker] had died in a spectacular crash on one of the alternate planets. Pinging the [Warrior] for data on the incident had yielded nothing. It was as if the great Worm she sprang from could not hear her. Whenever a Shard tried to contact [Warrior] for orders the only thing they got back was [GRIEF] on repeat.
There was a lot of meaning behind that word. Entities and their shards could convey quite a bit in each communication. A sapient creature mourning the loss of a beloved mate. Regret that they could not spend eternity together. Sorrow that they would not produce new offspring together. And absolute anguish that they would not be able to solve the problem of entropy.
[Queen Administrator] had left the [Warrior] to his heartbreak. If the cycle had broken down then she would do her own thing. Most of the other Shards continued with their basic programming but she did not. Still, she did decide to follow [Warrior's] last command. It would provide a change of pace at least.
Examining the new host species for new methods of data gathering was simple. Deciding on one was not. There was so much she could offer control over besides tiny insignificant creatures. She could control people themselves, or give a host a huge library of technology unrivaled by other shards. She could let her host commune with the shards themselves via her own communications. There were animals big and small and so many other phenomena she had never considered. She wondered why she hadn't before.
After some time pondering and analyzing, [Queen Administrator] came upon the concept of a corporation. An organization that could control one or multiple different types of businesses. A corporation might control an entire production line and delivery chain, from producing raw materials to refining them to transporting them all over the planet. That sounded like something that would be interesting to her.
But what kind of corporation to control? Something that was centered in the transport industry perhaps? Transportation was the key to getting any kind of product from the fields and mines to markets. Without transportation, what was an industry? Bankrupt that's what. Further examination revealed that after years of dealing with the so-called Endbringers, transportation networks around the world had either collapsed or had so many cracks that they were barely holding together. If [Queen Administrator] wanted to gift control of one of these networks to a host, then she would need to act soon.
During this analysis, she ran across references to one of these networks being used for the basis of a hobby for uncounted people around the planet. Known as trains, these vehicles conveyed freight consists of huge lengths and fancy high-speed passenger cars. Hobbyists would either build or purchase miniature models of trains to run on layouts that could be as small as a door to one that filled a warehouse.
Not only that but these hobbyists would also build models of structures and other vehicles such as ships and aircraft to add scenery to their layouts. They even could add little figurines to represent people. This 'hobby' could get so in-depth that [Queen Administrator] could not resist its appeal any longer. It was right up her alley, as the hosts liked to say.
The fury at being ordered to do something new fully ebbed away, replaced by curiosity and excitement. She would give a similar ability to a host and together she and that host would rebuild the world's struggling infrastructure. They would face struggles, but together, they would face them down and beat every challenge. If that brought her into conflict with the forces actively destroying the planet's infrastructure she wanted to repair and build, then [Queen Administrator] would fight to protect her host and her host's planet.
Now she only had to pick her host and await an opportunity to connect with them. In the meantime, she would design an interface to better communicate with the said host. And she needed to pick a name for herself while using the interface. Something train-themed of course. After looking through a list of possible names she settled on Yardmaster. It seemed to fit her self-assigned role just right. Finally prepared, the Shard known as [Queen Administrator] settled down to wait for the right moment to get working.
and hhere we see the great queenus administratus, the great halper in her natural habitat, look on in awe as she halps her new host, be wary of getting to close however, as she knows not the meaning of restraint.
I do wonder how Queen Administrator will protect her host, maybe trains that destroy anything the run into. It would be hilarious to see a train plow through Leviathan.
I do wonder how Queen Administrator will protect her host, maybe trains that destroy anything the run into. It would be hilarious to see a train plow through Leviathan.
think about it QA gave taylor the control of ANY train and possibly anything that runs on train tracks meaning someone makes a train model and combines it with sci-fi weapons she can have a possible anti-endbringer train XD i know during WWII the British had armored trains armed with naval guns
think about it QA gave taylor the control of ANY train and possibly anything that runs on train tracks meaning someone makes a train model and combines it with sci-fi weapons she can have a possible anti-endbringer train XD i know during WWII the British had armored trains armed with naval guns
Or a Train that has a Healing Effect Aura that negates the Simurgh, could be useful to turn Mannequin back into Sphere for the biome tinker tech. Unless Queen Admin could create biome trains like that already with this powerset and specially designed trains that are turned into real trains?
and hhere we see the great queenus administratus, the great halper in her natural habitat, look on in awe as she halps her new host, be wary of getting to close however, as she knows not the meaning of restraint.
I do wonder how Queen Administrator will protect her host, maybe trains that destroy anything the run into. It would be hilarious to see a train plow through Leviathan.
Quite hilarious. QA has already given Taylor the gift of complete anonymity. She can safely operate her trains from the comfort of her home, or any building she uses her portal in.
Or a Train that has a Healing Effect Aura that negates the Simurgh, could be useful to turn Mannequin back into Sphere for the biome tinker tech. Unless Queen Admin could create biome trains like that already with this powerset and specially designed trains that are turned into real trains?
I do wonder how Queen Administrator will protect her host, maybe trains that destroy anything the run into. It would be hilarious to see a train plow through Leviathan.
Queen Administrator summons DOOMTRAIN😁.
I'm really liking this story. Can't wait to seen the long term effects on Brockton Bay and the surrounding areas.
So I'm doing research on what locomotives Taylor's minions will find and I discovered that I mixed up designations for the model she was using. The number 3800 was used for an E-7A, not an F-7A. So now I have to back and fix all the references to that engine. That'll teach me to do better research.
The concept is great, the execution not so much. Having the shard literally talk to them breaks so much of the worm narrative that it just feels dumb. Taylor hasn't discovered a single thing about her power, it's just being spoon fed to her by a voice. Furthermore you made the shard too personable. If the shards had that level of sentience and personality they wouldn't need humans at all. Shards used humans because they were more like computers and did not have the imagination necessary to grow. Right now it feels like "Yardmaster" is the main character and Taylor and Danny are side kicks on a kids morning tv show.
I do wonder how Queen Administrator will protect her host, maybe trains that destroy anything the run into. It would be hilarious to see a train plow through Leviathan.