With his new Castle constructed and his Sister off doing secret agent stuff (Probably), John finally had time to get down the important stuff: Preparing to have his first Duel!
…He was just hitting a few snags along the way.
John winced. "We can't use this."
Grace looked up. "Hmm?"
He pointed at the list. "These rules, we have to change them for our games. They just… They don't make sense with the cards I have access to! It wouldn't be a game, it would be a slaughter!"
Seriously, no restrictions on using 'The Heart of the Cards' to manipulate your card selection? No limits on what cards can be played when? Only allowing one card to attack per turn, and losing if you are unable to summon at least one monster by the end of each round? At least you can't attack the opposing Duelist directly under these limits, but even THAT felt fundamentally wrong…
It was all ridiculous! "Some magic and trap cards seem to cause life point damage when they destroy a monster… For no reason at all. Field spell cards can do nearly ANYTHING, and almost anything can be equipped to anything else, including
monsters equipping other monsters to themselves!"
Like look at THIS crazy shit: In a
duel, someone used a card called '
Living Arrow' to activate a '
Polymerization' card, fuzing their zombie monster with the opponent's creature. Who then got a strange attack draining poison like effect, because… Zombies don't mix with living creatures?
But only in THIS case, because in OTHER situations you could fuze zombies and normal monsters and get whole NEW creatures all the time with NO penalties.
This was all just pure madness and chaos.
Sigh. Just move on John, just move on. "Leave the rule wobbling stuff alone for now… And let's forget the biggest issues, like my Soul being so powerful that if I played unrestricted my opponent might have a heart attack before we can even draw our first hand…"
Grace was still trying to prevent problems like that. "With how these rules work NOW, I'm pretty sure I can win BEFORE they have their first turn! Even without how broken my stuff is, it would be trivial to crush anyone!"
Seriously, half his cards were able to steal monsters or cards from his opponent, the other half revolved around his frogs hopping from deck to field to grave and all over the place, causing all sorts of effects and…
Right. "Give me a different set of rules… No, all of them! This is my field and I'm going to pick rules that will at least allow my opponents to play before they get smashed out of existence."
Let's see… Higher starting life points were a must. Change the rules for summoning a bit… Why would you ever summon a monster in FACE UP defense position? Maybe there were some
special effects that required that?
Either way, THAT was getting tossed out. Otherwise, every single face down defense monster would scream out 'Kill me quick, I am a flip effect monster!' Sheesh.
He grumbled again, staring at paused video footage. "I'm going to add another custom rule here: Any damage done will get rounded up to the nearest increment of 100. A monster
causing 1,794 attack damage makes ALL following math complicated and annoying, and I don't consider that to be fun."
John felt more and more frustrated as he moved through the rulings. "I basically need to design my own custom Duel format here… That's kind of messed up."
His demoness huffed from her lounging chair. "Have you SEEN the local duels? Half the morons actually shout out with pride, 'I summon my weak and wimpy monster in attack position!' Why would you EVER summon a non-effect monster with low attack stats in attack position!?"
He absently responded while still reviewing these odd rules. "Maybe to lure them into attacking?"
She grunted. "They are going to attack anyway! Because half the damned deck is composed of random low attack, low defense monsters with no abilities!"
Grace was growing ever more amused. "I thought you didn't care about 'a stupid card game'?"
Temptation stabbed towards her sister with an accusing finger! "I DON'T care about the card game, I DO care about idiots doing stupid shit! Being too weak to pull good cards or build a good deck is one thing, shoving your own privates towards the incoming blade is infuriating!"
…Ew. "Thank you for that mental image." Hmm. "And from what the data says, it seems that requiring qualification challenges and stuff is common here. Almost every tournament has a few layers set up beforehand, to weed out the idiots or kick out the wimps. Several won't let a Duelist even TRY to compete if they don't have at least one monster with a sufficiently powerful level rating in their deck… We could do that, I think!"
After all, if you didn't even have a Soul capable of including a 7 star monster (At least!), then how could you even approach some of the more powerful Duelists who could cause organ damage just by being angry enough when sending a Duel Monster to attack?
After all, even if most of John's Deck was composed of low level amphibians, even HE had a copy of the level 8 star '
D.3.S. Frog' lazing around his card collection…
And he was only an 8 star monster! There were frogs and toads that technically didn't even exist yet that had reached all the way up to 12 stars according to Substitoad!
…That said, the huge chonky 12 star monster, Toad-thulu, spent most of her time sleeping and was unlikely to come along with the rest of the pond migration, so maybe she shouldn't count?
But even then, there were dozens of high star amphibians that could theoretically hop up if they were needed! And the same was true for every OTHER archetype out there!
What then was THEIR excuse for not even being able to scrounge up a single 7 star or higher partner to fight for them? 'Oops, I suck so bad I am unable to even get a pity card'?
And some of these people wanted to actually compete using only a
3 star normal monster with 600 attack? John pulled up the video clips. "Grace, look at these people PLAYING that poor weak thing against big beefy dinosaurs! At least have that poor plant be part of a combo, or work together with powerful spells or SOMETHING!
While he worked himself up into a huff, Grace by comparison was FAR more hesitant. "Maybe these Duelists chose low star monsters to better accommodate some sort of strategy? One they just didn't have a chance to show on camera?"
John couldn't help but snort as he shared a data stream. "I wish, but I have far too many examples here… I mean, look at this moron! He played an '
Ancient Brain' in attack mode, and that poor thing only has 1,000 attack! According to his deck list, ALL his monsters are normal monsters! No special effects, no magic cards, no field spells or equipment or traps… Just a bunch of these little guys."
Those poor little dudes in the video were being summoned one after another and being obliterated by some random guy using dragons.
It hurt to watch… Turn after turn: 'I summon another baby!', SMASH, 'OH NO! How could you destroy my {fill in latest victim}!? I better summon out my NEXT baby, and then YOU'LL be sorry!'
John stared at the video stream. "Like… At least summon those tiny things in defense mode as chump blockers or something…" Sigh. "Not that it matters, the idiot has nothing stronger to support them and no tech options AT ALL to handle anything his opponent may do."
Why were people like this even ALLOWED to call themselves Duelists?
Right. "We have GOT to find a middle ground here… Some set of rules that will filter out anyone like that while reducing the chance of supernatural effects from dominating every game."
Hmm. Best address deck construction first then. "I'm thinking about allowing only one copy of each card unless duplicates are required for special effects or summoning criteria to properly operate. That would put powerful and underperforming decks on more equal footing… Ban direct card draw entirely? Maybe. The cards could get 'drawn' by a neutral assistant or an automated system, so no one can alter probability with their will power to always get the perfect card..."
John's fingers began tapping. "We can let one monster be designated as the Duelist's
Spirit Partner as compensation, some rules allow that. Keep that one card separate from the deck, so it can be cast as needed initially? That should make up for not being allowed to just draw it on demand like usual."
Wait, no. "Some monsters WANT to go into the grave, so that MIGHT be very abusable if you always had access to them at the start of the Duel… Maybe? Hmm. We need something else."
Then again: In normal gameplay the opponent would always have access to their monsters when needed ANYWAY, so maybe that didn't matter? This would just formalize the effect so weaker opponents wouldn't be surprised when a massive bomb dropped on them out of nowhere.
John slumped. "Girls, we will need to workshop this a few times. And that's assuming anyone even bothers to build a new Deck to come out here and challenge the Frog Emperor in the first place!"
The lazy temptress snorted. "Nah, this Realm is obsessed with this card game… If you make the challenge and rules clear, our swamp will be swarmed in minutes."
Grace also winced. "If anything my Lord, having the rules actually listed and available BEFORE any such tournament would probably cause a frenzy of excitement… It is very common for major fights to just introduce rules that only exist with specific board states or real world scenarios adding unofficial restrictions or effects."
Really? "Are people actually allowed to just… Add rules to a game mid fight like that?"
Temptation nodded. "Not just game rules… Sometimes they change the card text itself! Keep looking at the data I"ve been feeding you this stuff is crazy."
No, this was already a bit too much. "Maybe later. Anyway, from what I can tell? We can set up a tournament and then establish custom rules to begin with and that should cut out like… MOST of this crazy stuff."
True, he'd gain information about Soul enhancement from Dueling slower, but at least there would BE Duels to learn from! "I think it will be fine as long as we emphasize that half the actual fight will be all about Deck construction and the other half gameplay. And considering how BAD most of these Decks have turned out to be already, I'm pretty sure this will filter out the trash players pretty easily."
Like, maybe John was spoiled by all those awesome example Decks that the card shop grandpa sold his sister, but seriously! There was horrific amateur crap in some of these Decks!
Not just weak creatures with no synergy, some decks included powerful cards WITHOUT including the needed support cards required to summon them!
It was literally a brick, unplayable and wasting a card draw. Why include it in the Deck then? Or more importantly, if there were other cards that the Duelist needed to gather or collect FIRST, why had they competed in an actual tournament or expo BEFORE fixing that shit!?
Maybe Deck construction was less emphasized here because most of the time it didn't matter?
After all, if you were weak, you'd never make it beyond two turns ANYWAY.
And if you were strong, your Deck would just alter reality itself to ensure you just happened to have what you needed for any situation.
…Still, it felt lazy and unforgivable. "Maybe we should make 75% of this about constructing your Deck… Yeah, let's do that."
Drawing cards done by a third party should cut down on the crazy.
Require only one of each card unless another card demands otherwise, to prevent someone just stuffing a dozen copies of one big monster in there or something like that?
But how to emphasize deck building… And not being allowed to draw would really piss off some people, but getting around that cheating ability was going to be rough… Hmm.
Mentally tumbling the idea around, John blinked. "Proxies."
Grace looked up from the ongoing piles of paperwork needed for this. "Proxies?"
John grinned! "Yep!" This wasn't a perfect solution, but it SHOULD create a sort of bridge allowing the weakest and strongest Duelists to play against each other despite supernatural advantages… "Girls, let me run this by you, alright?"
Temptation waved away the 'hilarious' videos of idiots smashing their baby monsters against
literal walls and Grace sat at attention.
John was drawing up his ideas on a virtual display. "We will do this by using card piles and proxy cards."
He pointed at the screen. "In my tournament, each player will split their Deck up into piles, or pools of cards: Monsters 4 stars and below; Monsters 5 stars and above; Spells; Traps; and Field Spells."
John waved to one side. "Anything that belongs in that 'Extra Deck' mess gets set aside in its own pool that we ignore for now."
A pile of nearly identical white cards were Crafted. "Then before each Duel, the players will construct a proxy deck using these! Each white card has the name of one of the sorted piles we already set up here... So in an actual game you may end up with a hand with three Spell cards and two Low Monsters, or one High Monster and some Traps or whatever."
John tapped the screen. "You can trade in your Proxy card for anything you want out of the pile it matches… And if that pool is already EMPTY, you take 500 life points of damage."
He couldn't help but grin! "This will allow the weaker Duelists to 'always draw the perfect card' like their opponents while also penalizing the powerful Duelists who never bothered to learn how to set up a Deck in the first place!"
Sure, you could only have spells and monsters to avoid getting dinged for 500 burn damage due to uncautious deck construction… But that TOO was part of building a Deck!
Heck, if someone was clever enough they could include a single very important Trap or whatever and a BUNCH of Trap proxies to ensure they draw it as soon as possible, while just accepting the ongoing injuries afterwards as a part of doing business. Or something similar with the other piles.
But if you built a whole deck around one or two cards and just let the excess proxies burn you alive in the process, that was kind of hard core… And in John's opinion, you EARNED a victory if you win like that.
After all, burn damage here didn't just mean the Life Point counter goes down.
It actually hurt the Soul on some level. Hurt like a bitch!
So the penalty would likely be respected, probably. "Cards will go into the graveyard or get banished like normal, but if any get sent back into the Deck then they get replaced with a matching Proxy card instead. And not one that matches their CURRENT star level or card type or whatever, because some cards can change that stuff, but the proxy card that originally had been used when it was pulled from the pools."
This should fix SEVERAL problems! "Heck, since the proxy cards don't interact in any way with the Soul Fragments, this means I can do that awesome dramatic 'I DRAW A CARD' thing they do on T.V.! This is going to be awesome!"
Grace hummed. "We should have three rounds of gameplay per Duel I think… And let them adjust the ratio of proxy cards between each one. Best of three rounds would be the winner of the overall Duel… Should we let them change the actual cards in their deck as well?"
Hmm. "...Tentatively yes. But only between major Duels I think, not between each round. After all, building a good Deck is the whole point of this change." In fact, this was ringing a bell somehow…
Hadn't he seen something like this in the earlier data? Oh yeah! "Some areas have something called a 'Side Deck', or a limited selection of cards that are submitted to the Tournaments before anyone starts playing, so that people can't just replace all their cards half way through a series of matches. Right?"
Grace hummed. "Yes, a 15 card selection that can be exchanged with cards from your main Deck between rounds of gameplay."
John grinned! "Right, we limit the total number of total cards in the pools to the lowest amount allowed in a Deck, so 40 in this case. The Side Deck will be capped at 15 cards, and the Duelists can swap them in and out between rounds of the Tournament only… Probably will have to have them list all the cards in their Decks at the start of this mess too, to prevent cheating or cards altering themselves due to the power of their owners."
Temptation was lounging even harder at the side, her attention not really focused on either of them as she relaxed nearly to the point of falling out of her chair entirely… "Does the 40 cards limit include that 'Extra Deck' thing? The one all your Frogs are moving into? Cause you got like a few million in there right now."
Oh right, shit. "We will slap a separate cap of 15 cards on that too, and I'll just pretend the ones NOT on my Deck List aren't there. As long as I don't play the others, it should work out the same." Right?
Yeah, toad-ally!
As John continued crafting his upcoming 'Frog Emperor Presents the Fight of the Ground Fable' Tournament, some absent part of his thought process began considering what sort of prize the champion should get.
Or should he bother? If he won, wouldn't he just be rewarding himself? Then again, that felt pretty darn cocky and overconfident.
…Meh, might as well just give prizes to the top like, 100 or so people. No, wait… There might not be that many people!
Lets see, best work this backwards… A final Duel for a winner, another for the ones choosing who is in the finals, another and another…
So like what, seven rounds would make sense right? And that would end up needing… 128 Duels involving 256 Duelists? …That seemed a bit much for a tournament… And a lot of work…
Best cut it back to five rounds.
After a bit of mental wrangling, John nodded to himself and sent a mental note to his sister.
[[From HOST: Hey sis! Just a heads up: I think after we have an elimination round we will end up hosting 32 Duelists for this tournament. It might take a few days after we get all the rules established and start the advertising campaign, but they shouldn't stay much longer than a few days at most unless we do something fun and awesome during the first chaotic bit.]]
As for the prizes… Meh, might as well just take suggestions. Didn't some other tournaments offer vague stuff like wishes or whatever? He could probably fake that ability with a bit of effort, or just hand over his account full of cash when they left this Realm.
Oh wait.
[[From HOST: ~PS: ALSO a heads up! I've decided to throw a tournament at the castle.]]
Whew! He nearly got in trouble there!