Tithed_Verse
Vainglorious
- Location
- Iowa
- Pronouns
- They/Them
But the Triumvirate absolutely needs that.
Monster
- Thread starter Ghoul King
- Start date
- Location
- Wherever
Yeah, this is part of what I was getting at about the cut content. It was supposed to touch on plague-related stuff, and one of the consequences would've been that the Emma/Sophia end of things is more like explicit confirmation they got caught up in things rather than 'lol karma'.
And then I cut it and goddammit that was a mistake I'm going to be fixing, hard-to-write or no.
I've said before I've reworked my assumptions of how to model her and indeed will probably be editing the relevant chapter to be more consistent with my new model.
I mean, you're still free to worry I'm going to ruin her, but you should be worrying I'll ruin her in a new way if so.
Well, I suppose that's a valid concern, but my difficulties so far have been... like, imagine if Cherie had never entered the story, and it was just Taylor Kills Nilbog, Taylor Kills Heartbreaker, Taylor Keeps On Killing People And Brooding To Herself And I Guess The PRT Jumps Her At Some Point. People have commented they can't imagine this story without Cherie as the deuteragonist, and with good reason: Taylor's perspective is interesting, and I do fight scenes decently when the story ends up with a good reason to have one, but a lot of the meat of the narrative is the two of them playing off each other and developing each other's respective characters, with the actions they're participating in being context, not the primary 'point' of the story.
By a similar token, I already know bits and pieces of what the events of The Wild Hunt are (Obvious example: Nilbog Plague fallout), but it's taking work to put it together into something that isn't A Series Of Linear Events But Who Cares.
I considered pointing that out myself tbh, but I imagine Salty would basically just point out that Taylor is essentially a serial killer. A well-meaning serial killer with a severe cognitive impairment fairly directly leading to said serial killing, sure, but it's not hard to argue she is monstrous metaphorically/'on the inside'.
If I were to try to argue roughly this angle, I'd sooner point to how Cherie has no monstrous outside to her but is... Cherie. However much people might like her and be cheering on her attempts to clue Taylor, she's certainly not a good person.
Crawler: Ah, you want me to draw fire in an attention-grabbing way! Sounds perfect, I'm in.
Cherie: Well actually I was thinkin-
Taylor: Good planning, Cherie, I wasn't sure how we'd fit Crawler into our low-profile approach, that makes a lot of sense.
Cherie: No, I meant-
Mimi: How do I fit into this?
Cherie: You'd be-
Taylor: Hit and run for flashier targets, or to pull people away from Crawler if we need to isolate them or something.
Cherie: Come on-
Bonesaw: Wait, am I Team Flashy or Team Sneaky?
Cherie: Hate all of y-
Taylor: Well, it depends on what we need you doing, really. We're headed to Boston to get you a lab, so we need you being sneaky right now, but once the plague is Fixed... I'm flexible. Or you are, I guess I should say.
Cherie: POSING FOR MAXIMUM COOLNESS WAS THE POINT!!!!
Taylor:...
Bonesaw:...
Mimi:...?
Crawler: *not paying attention anymore*
Cherie: Goddammit, it's a shock-and-awe style thing, make people know we're here because we're so confident we can take on anyone that people run for the hills instead of fighting us.
Taylor: But if they run, I can't kill them.
Mimi: I thought we weren't continuing the Nine's practices?
Taylor: Of course not. I mean, yeah we're going to kill a lot of people, and okay the Nine killed plenty of villains too, and maybe we've recruited a team that's now 3/5ths ex-Nine, but it's completely different.
Mimi: Um. How?
Taylor: We're killing for great justice.
Mimi:... um, what's the not-a-joke answer?
Cherie: Look, Mimi, just ignore her, she's the Boss because I like her and all, not because she's a stellar example of internal consistency or self-awareness.
Taylor: It's different. The Nine were making the world a worse place, I'm making it a better place. This isn't complicated.
Bonesaw: ~Wasn't the Nine who triggered Uncle Nilbog's dead man's switch~
Taylor: That was an accid- okay, accident isn't right, but I couldn't have known. And I'm working to Fix it right now. The Nine don't fix things. It's against their MO. Hell, you'd know better than me, you're the one who stitched together abominations.
Mimi: I'm, um. Cherie, when you say Taylor is the 'boss', do you mean you expect me to take orders from her or something? Because... I'm a little uncomfortable with her at this point.
Cherie: You don't have to sugarcoat it, Mimi, she's not going to kill you for being honest and I like her just the way she is. Mostly. Couple of things I'd like better, but not anything you'd complain about. You're not even into girls.
Mimi:...
Cherie: No! Labyrinth doesn't count! I've been over this! You bonded over shitty circumstances and you've projected a bunch of optimistic bullshit onto Labyrinth because she barely talks and so couldn't do a lot to dispute your view of her! You like her for the imagined naivete and shit! An idealized, imaginary version of her! You don't react that way when talking about her!
Mimi:... I'm thinking of setting you on fire now.
Cherie: Fuck! God- no, okay, sorry, fire down you still want me for help with your control and you know I won't help you if you burn the shit out of me so just fucking don't.
Mimi: Labyrinth was still nice to me after I burned her.
Taylor: You did what?
Cherie: OH MY GOD THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A CONVERSATION ABOUT COOL SUPERHERO POSING
Mimi: Yeah, I'm-
thud
Cherie: You know what, I'm not even going to tease you Taylor. Knocking her the fuck out was a good plan. Thanks. Bonesaw, can you make sure there's no long-term damage?
Bonesaw:... I'd rather be a magical girl princess than a superhero...
Cherie: UUURghGHrrr
Crawler: Huh? Wha? Are we fighting each other now?
Cherie: GO TO SLEEP NED THE ADULTS ARE TALKING
Crawler: Feh. Wake me when somebody tries to kill somebody else.
Taylor: You'll be the first to know.
Cherie:...
Bonesaw: ~hmm hm hm~
Taylor:...
Cherie:... so that's a no to-
Taylor: Correct.
Cherie: Fine. Whatever. Spoil all my fun.
Cherie: So I was thinking we have Bonesaw rig up some kind of Monster Signal. First you'll need an icon, obviously, but-
Taylor: No.
Cherie: *pouts*
- Location
- USA
Bonesaw the magical girl princess. It's... well honestly I'm kind of struggling to see how this could possibly be more bizarre and nonsensical than the wanton murderhobocult she was part of in Worm's canon. Hopefully it's less murderhoboculty than what she was running around doing previously, but this is Bonesaw so who knows.
globalwarmth
ruining the weather.
- Location
- Polar ice caps
virus for growing hives in the shape of the wild hunt logo?
Salty
Shadow Cabal Assumptor Supreme
- Location
- Sun, Moon, Talia
- Pronouns
- I/Me
Cherie Vasil: tHeRaPiSt To ThE nInE
Dragon was given credit for killing Nilbog. Why would the protectorate put it out there that the plague was Nilbog's killswitch?
- Location
- Wellesley MA
- Location
- Germany
Because they either didn't know about it until it was too late, or thought they could contain it?
- Location
- France
Well it's not like Cherie can criticize others on unhealthy relationships given the glass house she's living in, so Gambatte, Mimi-chan! I'm rooting for you!
Tangentially related, I've recently been thinking about the S9's recruitment tests, and specifically Mimi going through them when she was recruited. I can imagine that she got through the tests thanks to her power-induced psychopathy, and later when she came down from it, she realized the full weight of what she was made to do and was done to her and it broke her. Hell, that may have been Jack's final test for her given how that sadist operates. "Burnscar, I want you to stop using your power for a moment. Do that and you're in. It's quite simple compared to my compatriots' tests, isn't it?"
Dawnk41
Comatose Grizzly
- Location
- America
His point was that since Dragon has credit for Nilbog's death, they would rather avoid the narrative that his death has some massive negative consequences, and they might subtly support some alternative ideas, like it being Bonesaw or Blasto's fault somehow.
serra2
Himouto! Sylvanas-chan
Went back for a re-read, and noticed this bit
So looks like my "Cut back to Emma and Sophia's wacky monster adventures" might actually be a relevant bit of plot.
- Location
- Wherever
Past me, why the hell do you like "putting everything" into "quotation marks"? Did you think this "added clarity"?
Here I thought the early editing would mostly be correcting comma placement...
In any event, Arc 1 is edited, including that I've updated the Story Only Thread. No significant changes have been made, but I did tweak some sentences that were badly constructed to give them greater clarity.
Arc 2's editing (Which is not yet complete) has involved minor consistency editing: in the original version of 2.1, Taylor 'discovers' details of her people-sensing power that she explicitly relied on in Arc 1. Not a big deal, just tweaked her framing in 2.1, but irritating I didn't notice it before and I like to be reasonably transparent about changes.
Here I thought the early editing would mostly be correcting comma placement...
In any event, Arc 1 is edited, including that I've updated the Story Only Thread. No significant changes have been made, but I did tweak some sentences that were badly constructed to give them greater clarity.
Arc 2's editing (Which is not yet complete) has involved minor consistency editing: in the original version of 2.1, Taylor 'discovers' details of her people-sensing power that she explicitly relied on in Arc 1. Not a big deal, just tweaked her framing in 2.1, but irritating I didn't notice it before and I like to be reasonably transparent about changes.
Jamie Roberts
Hávamál 127
- Location
- N/A
- Pronouns
- she/her
I like the way Ghoul King isn't dead anymore. Now we'll just have to bait him into an extended rant about something in canon that doesn't make sense, and it'll be just like the good old days!
Salty
Shadow Cabal Assumptor Supreme
- Location
- Sun, Moon, Talia
- Pronouns
- I/Me
Psst! Hey kid, want some Contessa?
HatsuZ
Phantom Thief
- Location
- Over the rainbow!
What do you mean by 'dead'? He's a *ghoul*, after all. By definition, he is always dead.
Ganurath
Literal Enthusiast
- Location
- A Valid Location
- Pronouns
- He/Him
We should be mindful to avoid Ward spoilers if things go that way, although I do wonder if the sequel's cast includes anyone Taylor would consider worthy of her kill list. By which I mean I wonder who among the cast she'd consider going after.
- Location
- France
I hear Cauldron is a very smart and pragmatic organization.
Salty
Shadow Cabal Assumptor Supreme
- Location
- Sun, Moon, Talia
- Pronouns
- I/Me
Doctor Mother makes the best possible long-term planner due to space whale aliens not fucking with her brain!
- Location
- France
Ah, I must have missed that. Thank you for replying !
HoratioVonBecker
Imperfectly Aligned
Interesting! I'm four chapters in, and (although I don't really like how Nilbog died), the fight was quite reasonable. I also don't know why Taylor doesn't think Dragon was just shooting at her to keep Nilbog from going after the rest of the planet - maybe brain damage? - but hopefully she'll reconsider soon.
Also, she needs to carry a compact hand-mirror in Monster form. Maybe add one to the inside of her helmet, too - she can presumably blink in order to transform it away.
...Wait, how did she take the helmet off? Wouldn't the jaw-part block her vision long enough for her to transform?
Also, I'm not sure what hoops she's talking about.
*Goes back to reading*
Also, she needs to carry a compact hand-mirror in Monster form. Maybe add one to the inside of her helmet, too - she can presumably blink in order to transform it away.
...Wait, how did she take the helmet off? Wouldn't the jaw-part block her vision long enough for her to transform?
She stows the costume twice.
I'd expect a comma between "awesome" and "Dad".
I don't understand this sentence. I thought Taylor was facing the stove, and her dad was facing her? Putting a table between the stove and the sink is pretty strange kitchen design.
Also, I'm not sure what hoops she's talking about.
Ha!
*Goes back to reading*
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- Location
- Wherever
I mean, on the one hand a lot of the emotional investment that's why I got so frustrated with that stuff doesn't apply anymore.
On the other hand, plotting out The Wild Hunt has already involved new 'canon, why' moments.
It could go either way.
I mean, that would require me to actually read Ward. Given I'm still in the middle of Damsel of Distress' flashback Arc and haven't even tried to read another chapter in months... prospects aren't promising.
It would also require me acknowledge Ward's canonicity, which is a dubious prospect. Like, there is no way to reconcile the Fallen from Worm with the Fallen from Ward: they share a name and being horrible people, and that's it. Monster Taylor certainly isn't going to get into a face-off with grandma whatever the hell her name is outside an omake, because I literally cannot believe she exists in the same universe as the events of Worm.
... how did I miss that? I literally did an editing pass on that chapter less than a week ago!
Corrected, thanks.
I'm not going to dispute whether it's strange kitchen design or not, but I've seen exactly that distribution before: stove, series of cabinets, and then sink at the opposite end from the stove, with enough room to have a table in between.
By 'hoops' she's talking about the process of arranging to wash dishes and whatnot without transforming and without having to figure out how to avoid doing anything obviously weird in front of Danny, whether as a side effect of transforming or from doing weird things to avoid transforming.
I've said this elsewhere in the thread, but if transforming would cause her to be able to see herself as the monster clearly, she won't transform.
The effect you're imagining would apply to someone else removing their helmet while looking at her, but not when looking at herself via a mirror.
Jamie Roberts
Hávamál 127
- Location
- N/A
- Pronouns
- she/her
[Immediately starts a mini-rant about Ward.]
Yes, this. This exactly; channel your anger! Give in to your hatred!
Ganurath
Literal Enthusiast
- Location
- A Valid Location
- Pronouns
- He/Him
In fairness, the Fallen of Worm weren't the most developed and detailed faction.