No, it isn't. At least, that is not how many of the writers for Exalted intended it to be viewed.
At this point, I'm honestly wondering if you played the same game I did.
UMI is a matter of degree. It is the sort of thing that you cannot shrug and ignore. A Solar using UMI to seduce someone is not raping their mind to make them feel lust for him. He is being supernaturally charming and seductive. Now, being supernaturally charming and seductive can be used in ways to violate someone's mind. But it is not innately a violation.
This is
blatantly wrong, and ignores the separation between normal mental influence and UMI. There are lots of (for example) social charms that are not UMI, this is because they are what you call 'non mindrape UMI' but are in fact not UMI at all. To use a charm to make yourself super seductive is
not UMI, they are not described as such in the rules. To use a charm to force feelings of lust on a target
is UMI. One is mindrape (and UMI) and the other is absolutely not (NMI).
To use a example from the story; Wiess's speech. On the one hand she could have used a Performance charm to make herself super good at talking and inspired guilt in her audience through the sheer skill of her Essence-powered oration. This is NOT UMI. On the other hand, a solar could have gone "dicks" *walks away* and created the exact same effect via a more invasive Performance UMI charm forcing feelings of guilt and hallucinations of judging loved ones on those who who heard her. This IS UMI.
Hell, she could do
both at the same time.
It is the difference between "Hey, she's hot" and a face that launches a thousand ships.
This is true, but in the sense that a fist and a virus are both living weapons. Not the way your portraying it at all.
That said... im honestly not sure what else I can say here? Would you like me to quote the rulebook and every single UMI charm to show you that they all mess with peoples heads?
Hell, literally the first line under UMI; "Sorcerous mind control and powerful Social Charms carry Essence-charged effects into the minds of others."
*Addendum: And if that was the creators intent, why does Psyche exist in 3e? Its the same thing, made even more clear;
Psyche: A power with this keyword is an unnatural,
hypnotic, or sorcerous power that magically influences,
controls, or cripples an opponent's thoughts or feelings.
If they didnt intend for UMI to be mindrape, then why did they make the same thing in 3E even more clearly?