Crystal Tower... Hoo boy. Let's just say you are in for a wild ride. It's considered the most infamous final dungeon in Final Fantasy history for a damn good reason.
Let's Play Every Final Fantasy Game In Order Of Release [Now Finished: Final Fantasy Tactics]
- Thread starter Omicron
- Start date
- Let's Play
Crystal Tower... Hoo boy. Let's just say you are in for a wild ride. It's considered the most infamous final dungeon in Final Fantasy history for a damn good reason.
Zap Rowsdower
Ex-cultist vagrant
- Location
- Bright lights, big city
- Pronouns
- He/Him
There's quicksaves in this version, so he doesn't have to face The Gauntlet.
Final Fantasy III, Part 3
- Location
- Brittany, France
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Last time on Final Fantasy III, we crashed an airship and found the township of Caanan, ensuring Cid found his way back to his wife.
Also, Zerban on Discord points out to me something I have completely missed this entire time:
The world map shows for each location the exact number of chests and hidden items in it and how many you got.
I feel like an idiot for noticing this. I missed fully half of the loot in Altar Cave (the game's introductory dungeon). I'm planning to go back there and get everything, but it's gonna have to wait a bit due to unforeseen complications.
Anyway, for now we're in Caanan, and without clear directions (that's not a criticism; I like how this game makes me feel free to just walk around and pick up varied cues as to what to do next) I just talk to people around town.
It's frankly crazy how alive FF3's towns feel compared to the previous games:
There are way more people, and they not only talk about the world around them to give you actionable information, they do so in ways that express their own little individuality and drama. This girl is informing me about an NPC I should be seeking out and a location to check out, but she's doing so as a lovesick girl, and her mother a few feet above complains about how this Desch guy got her daughter all messed up.
We pay a visit to Cid, and find there's trouble at home:
He needs an Elixir to cure his wife's illness. Now, Elixirs have been a gameplay item in FFI (the ports at least - they didn't exist in the original NES version) and FFII, where they heal all HP and MP, making them pretty valuable. But they're either random drops (FFI) or cost a cool 50,000 gil (FFII), so, even if the town's item shop sold them, which it doesn't, they would be waaay out of my price range. Luckily, it turns out that the hint given by that NPC about a mage hiding some medicinal herb is a clue!
Whoever guessed that the reason the Jade Passage waterfall caused damage was because of the water falling gets a prize: the exact same thing happens with this perfectly ordinary, tiny waterfall in this ordinary, tiny stream. Baffling.
Notably, FFIII is the first game in the franchise to have hidden items that you can find by clicking the action button on an ordinary-looking tile of environment. FFI had none, FFII had them as secret doors in walls, but this is the first game in which you press A next to a patch of grass and get an Elixir. Thankfully, we are not yet in Pokémon hell, where there is no clue whatsoever as to where the hidden items are (fifteen years on I still have the location of a particular Sugar Candy seared into my mind); the game shows an exclamation mark when you're facing the right tile.
Cid rewards us by revealing a hidden passage inside his own home that leads to a bunch of loot. Weirdest of which being…
What?
The description of gnomish bread says that it reveals the map, which seems weird since there is already a map function baked into the game. I use it to check what it means and…
Ooooh.
Look at all the grey dots. Gnomish bread reveals the locations that are on the map which I haven't discovered yet. That's really neat! And in particular it reveals the location of a spot right next to the town, so I decide to check that out next.
Although none of this answers my questions about what the hell gnomish bread is that it, like, causes you to go on some kind of vision trip that reveals the world to you-
It's drugs, isn't it. The answer is drugs. I just ate some ergot-laced bread and got, literally, high.
Well, anyway, time to check out the mountain below.
Dun-dun-dun-dun, making my way up the mountain…
Uh-oh.
Well, I'm sure it's nothing to worry about.
Random fact: in both FFI and FFII, there are three ways a battle can occur: a normal battle, a "preemptive strike" in which the PCs take an entire turn before the battle proceeds as normal, and an "ambush" in which the enemies get that benefit instead.
FFIII adds another, fourth way a battle can trigger:
During a 'back attack,' the sprites are reversed with the PCs on left of the screen instead of the right, enemies get the benefits of an ambush, and furthermore, the 'rows' are reversed - so your backbencher hit and get hit like they're in the front row, and your frontliners hit and get hit like they're in the back row. In practice that means all my non-casters deal half damage. It's pretty bad.
I just thought that was neat!
Dragon's Peak is, as one might guess, a simple climb up - during which I make a very interesting find!
This is the first appearance of a series staple, Aero, which feels an interesting - and important - niche: it's a low-level white magic damage spell that works against everything. Previously, white magic damage was either undead-specific (the Dia line), or was the high-end Holy. Aero means now white mage has a low-level option for dealing damage when they're not needed for healing or buffing, which is really nice, but does make Red Mage feel like even more of a third wheel.
'Jack of all trade, master of none,' that flat stat spread just makes me sad. I need to branch out.
And then, uh.
whaddaheck
The dragon just… picked me up and dropped me in its nest
There is no way out! I am trapped with a bunch of baby dragons that are probably going to eat me!
Honestly, for all that they have no individual voices, the FFIII protagonists have more répartie than I've seen from any of the FFII characters.
Desch adds that he has amnesia and doesn't remember anything beside his own name, which is a weird plot point to be throwing in, but sure, why not?
But then, of course, the dragon comes back.
C'mon, Desch, don't be a bitch, I'm sure it'll be fine-
I'm sorry what the fuck.
BAHAMUT IS HERE AND THIS TIME HE'S A BAD GUY ABORT ABORT WE'RE NOT EVEN TRYING THIS FIGHT IT'S FLEE O'CLOCK
NO DON'T STOP AND PICK UP RUSHANAQ IT'S TOO LATE SHE'S DRAGON FOOD NOW RUN RUN FOR YOUR LIVES
Oh my god I almost had a heart attack. I guess I can add to the tally of firsts "unwinnable battle that you are forced to flee from." Actual dragons are usually fairly late-game here so when Desch pre-emptively said to run I was expecting something like that to happen, but not for it to be this game's version of freaking Bahamut. Benevolent king of the dragons who grants aid to adventurers who show bravery this is not.
As thanks for helping save his ass, Desch gives us the Mini spell, and then we make our escape from the mountain by…
I can't walk under a waterfall without taking damage but I can jump down a mountaintop with zero consequence. I love this game.
Also, that Mini spell is deceptively important, because it's actually plot-related, by which I mean this is about to turn into Final Fantasy and the Minish Cap:
So I teach Mini to Mimi and have her cast it on the whole party, and…
We just.
We just miniaturized ourselves to walk into a tiny village.
What IS this game
God, when a town NPC first mentioned a 'gnome village,' I was expecting D&D gnomes. Like, dwarves. Hobbits. Fun-sized people. But no, it actually meant gnomes as in the tiny fairy beings who can fit in your hand. Living in the middle of… I want to say a maize field?
This is so ridiculous, I love it. I was half-expecting, like, "the sprites are normal but there are environmental cues like a giant flower to tell you that you're small," like in the Minish Cap, but no, they went with the hilarious minified battle sprites. For everything, even people you're talking to.
I fucking knew it. I knew it was drugs!
The gnomes tell me about a bunch of stuff, like a 'Miralnos Bassin' that is home to vikings, or 'Living Woods' that are full of fairies. Honestly the game in these past few towns has been dropping so many references to places elsewhere in the world that it feels much bigger than either previous game, just by anticipation. And in one house, I found a sick gnome who needs an antidote. Thankfully I got some in dungeon chests, so I give him one, and:
In return, he reveals that he too has a fucking SECRET TUNNEL PASSAGE INSIDE HIS HOUSE, WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS SETTING'S ARCHITECTS
You know what, no, hold on, I know exactly what this is reminding me of, let's go back a ways to one of my older works-
That's right, I am linking my Final Fantasy Let's Play and my Bernard Werber Let's Read. THE OMICRON CINEMATIC UNIVERSE IS COMING AND IT'S UNSTOPPABLE.
Anyway, yes, this dude has a secret passage in his house that leads to the Miralka Basin, home of the vikings. That passage is gnome-sized. It also has random encounters in it. Which means…
I have to fight every battle while miniaturized. Mini is a simple effect: it means my physical attacks deal 1 damage, and my defense is reduced to 1, so I take heavy damage from all enemy attacks. However, my spellcasting is unchanged. This means I am heavily relying on Rushanaq, and to a lesser extent Mimi and Tsugumi, to get through it, while Quaver is just sitting useless.
Of course, the correct move - and I suspect this is what you're intended to do in the NES version of the game where there are no quicksaves and wiping send you way back - would have been to stock up on magic items and give everyone some spells so I can job-swap into a full-caster party. But I had no idea this was coming, so I don't have the magic items for it, and Rushanaq is strong enough to carry. We make it through fine.
Unfortunately, I have another problem. Mainly, we're back to FFI-style magic - Vancian slots. I taught the Mini spell to Mimi because I figured she didn't have anything to do with her lv 2 spell slots, but she actually only has one lv 2 slot. Which means she can't cast Mini again to un-reduce the party. Which means…
I'm stuck this way. I go through most of the viking hideout (they're really just pirates) talking to people like this, which must be hilarious in-setting.
Fortunately the vikings also operate an inn, and I can rest to recover my MP and finally free myself from this curse.
The viking elder refers to the sea beast as the 'Nepto Dragon,' who is meant to slumber eternally but was arisen by the earthquake and is now rampaging wildly. The pirates only have one ship left, but they can't sail it - the dragon destroys anything it spots on the sea. This is, predictably, putting masculinity in a crisis:
It's up to me to save heterosexuality. Dude even offers me his last remaining ship if I kill the dragon, which does raise the question of how he intends to conduct his piratical business without a ship. Well, I suppose he still has all this loot stored with which to buy a new one.
What I haven't looted, anyway. These chests contain Fira, Thundara and Blizzara, and were concealed in a hidden room that wasn't pointed out to me and which I found through good old environmental awareness, so I am very happy to be rewarded for my sense of exploration with a significant upgrade in spell power.
Now, said ship is just waiting for me right outside the vikings' cave. Does that mean that I quicksave and head out to sea just to see what will happen? Yes. Is the result of doing so entirely and predictably fatal? Also yes.
TRI MARTOLOD YAOUANK, LA LA LA-
THIS IS SO NOT TRI YANN
Even with my new higher-tier spells, there's nothing I can do about a monster that kills one character per turn. The fight is a foregone conclusion.
But, just like Bahamut, there's no reason it would be a foregone conclusion, if I decided to just grind for twelve hours in the overworld and confront it at lv 50 or whatever, would it? Like, this thing 'only' deals ~500 damage. I can surely outstat it, if I put in the time and tedium? What would happen then? I'm curious, I'll look it up later.
You know how it goes, we reload and we go back to where we were supposed to go in the first place. There's a temple north of the viking lair, and inside it we find a statue of the Nepto Dragon (honestly, a much more flattering rendition thereof), missing one eye…
Is this…
Is this an actual mini dungeon?
Oh my god how precious.
Also, despite Desch having told me 'you know it would be good to have three Black Mages while miniaturized' at least twice, and the vikings having a magic shop, I just plain completely forget about job changes and just wade in with my current party, making it way harder than it needs to be.
It…
It even comes with its own unique tiny enemies…
SOME OF WHICH DON'T FUCK AROUND
This screenshot wasn't actually a wipe. Rushanaq managed to pull through a victory by the skin of her teeth with everybody else dead.
So of course I reloaded anyway because it would take too many phoenix downs and potions to heal everyone, because being Rushanaq is suffering.
And at the end of the tiny dungeon, is a tiny boss.
Unbelievably scuffed. How am I so bad at this game.
But eventually we pull through and defeat our toughest enemy so far, Literally A Big Rat.
And when we put the jewel back into the statue…
He bequeaths to us something called the 'Fang of Water,' whose purpose is obscure to me right now.
Oooh.
Eyes being the repository of a dragon's soul or power, and dragon eyes being removed, stolen, exchanged, and returned to their owner, is a huge part of draconic lore in FFXIV and features prominently as part of Heavensward's plot. I wasn't expecting it to show up here, though. With his soul returned and the connection to its body (which it, strangely enough, seems to be remote-controlling from this statue), Nepto beseeches us to find what I assume to be the Water Crystal and restore its light, then resumes his eternal slumber.
Hmm. The first crystal we found was the Wind Crystal, right? So, I think we're going to be doing a reverse order of FFI - Air-Water-Fire-Earth.
One really neat thing I'll note that is that the younger vikings only know the beast as "a sea dragon," the elder viking knows old lore about him and refers to it as "the Nepto Dragon," but is unaware that it's supposed to be benevolent - even his knowledge is distorted by time of what is actually "Nepto, the Sea Dragon," a sapient being with some kind of watchful purpose. It's a really neat bit of in-setting context loss, and totally believable as something that would happen over time.
And with this quest complete, the pirates, sorry, vikings do good on their word and hand over the Enterprise to us, allowing us free range of the seas!
And that's it for today.
Man.
This game is delightful.
There's just so much… wild inventivity, both narratively and mechanically? And the game feels so open. There's always a reward for snooping around, for exploring, for being curious, for studying your environment or paying attention to what people are saying. And sometimes the game punishes you for it, like me forgetting to change jobs in the mini dungeon, but that's fair! The obvious solution was there and I was a dumbass. And just the idea of the mini dungeon - of shifting the conditions of gameplay and asking you to adapt - is so interesting and funny. Bahamut picking us up and dropping us in a nest of dragonlings…
And it's going a hundred miles an hour, just bouncing from idea to idea, it's never boring.
I'm loving my time so far.
Also, Zerban on Discord points out to me something I have completely missed this entire time:
The world map shows for each location the exact number of chests and hidden items in it and how many you got.
I feel like an idiot for noticing this. I missed fully half of the loot in Altar Cave (the game's introductory dungeon). I'm planning to go back there and get everything, but it's gonna have to wait a bit due to unforeseen complications.
Anyway, for now we're in Caanan, and without clear directions (that's not a criticism; I like how this game makes me feel free to just walk around and pick up varied cues as to what to do next) I just talk to people around town.
It's frankly crazy how alive FF3's towns feel compared to the previous games:
There are way more people, and they not only talk about the world around them to give you actionable information, they do so in ways that express their own little individuality and drama. This girl is informing me about an NPC I should be seeking out and a location to check out, but she's doing so as a lovesick girl, and her mother a few feet above complains about how this Desch guy got her daughter all messed up.
We pay a visit to Cid, and find there's trouble at home:
He needs an Elixir to cure his wife's illness. Now, Elixirs have been a gameplay item in FFI (the ports at least - they didn't exist in the original NES version) and FFII, where they heal all HP and MP, making them pretty valuable. But they're either random drops (FFI) or cost a cool 50,000 gil (FFII), so, even if the town's item shop sold them, which it doesn't, they would be waaay out of my price range. Luckily, it turns out that the hint given by that NPC about a mage hiding some medicinal herb is a clue!
Whoever guessed that the reason the Jade Passage waterfall caused damage was because of the water falling gets a prize: the exact same thing happens with this perfectly ordinary, tiny waterfall in this ordinary, tiny stream. Baffling.
Notably, FFIII is the first game in the franchise to have hidden items that you can find by clicking the action button on an ordinary-looking tile of environment. FFI had none, FFII had them as secret doors in walls, but this is the first game in which you press A next to a patch of grass and get an Elixir. Thankfully, we are not yet in Pokémon hell, where there is no clue whatsoever as to where the hidden items are (fifteen years on I still have the location of a particular Sugar Candy seared into my mind); the game shows an exclamation mark when you're facing the right tile.
Cid rewards us by revealing a hidden passage inside his own home that leads to a bunch of loot. Weirdest of which being…
What?
The description of gnomish bread says that it reveals the map, which seems weird since there is already a map function baked into the game. I use it to check what it means and…
Ooooh.
Look at all the grey dots. Gnomish bread reveals the locations that are on the map which I haven't discovered yet. That's really neat! And in particular it reveals the location of a spot right next to the town, so I decide to check that out next.
Although none of this answers my questions about what the hell gnomish bread is that it, like, causes you to go on some kind of vision trip that reveals the world to you-
It's drugs, isn't it. The answer is drugs. I just ate some ergot-laced bread and got, literally, high.
Well, anyway, time to check out the mountain below.
Dun-dun-dun-dun, making my way up the mountain…
Uh-oh.
Well, I'm sure it's nothing to worry about.
Random fact: in both FFI and FFII, there are three ways a battle can occur: a normal battle, a "preemptive strike" in which the PCs take an entire turn before the battle proceeds as normal, and an "ambush" in which the enemies get that benefit instead.
FFIII adds another, fourth way a battle can trigger:
During a 'back attack,' the sprites are reversed with the PCs on left of the screen instead of the right, enemies get the benefits of an ambush, and furthermore, the 'rows' are reversed - so your backbencher hit and get hit like they're in the front row, and your frontliners hit and get hit like they're in the back row. In practice that means all my non-casters deal half damage. It's pretty bad.
I just thought that was neat!
Dragon's Peak is, as one might guess, a simple climb up - during which I make a very interesting find!
This is the first appearance of a series staple, Aero, which feels an interesting - and important - niche: it's a low-level white magic damage spell that works against everything. Previously, white magic damage was either undead-specific (the Dia line), or was the high-end Holy. Aero means now white mage has a low-level option for dealing damage when they're not needed for healing or buffing, which is really nice, but does make Red Mage feel like even more of a third wheel.
'Jack of all trade, master of none,' that flat stat spread just makes me sad. I need to branch out.
And then, uh.
whaddaheck
The dragon just… picked me up and dropped me in its nest
There is no way out! I am trapped with a bunch of baby dragons that are probably going to eat me!
Honestly, for all that they have no individual voices, the FFIII protagonists have more répartie than I've seen from any of the FFII characters.
Desch adds that he has amnesia and doesn't remember anything beside his own name, which is a weird plot point to be throwing in, but sure, why not?
But then, of course, the dragon comes back.
C'mon, Desch, don't be a bitch, I'm sure it'll be fine-
I'm sorry what the fuck.
BAHAMUT IS HERE AND THIS TIME HE'S A BAD GUY ABORT ABORT WE'RE NOT EVEN TRYING THIS FIGHT IT'S FLEE O'CLOCK
NO DON'T STOP AND PICK UP RUSHANAQ IT'S TOO LATE SHE'S DRAGON FOOD NOW RUN RUN FOR YOUR LIVES
Oh my god I almost had a heart attack. I guess I can add to the tally of firsts "unwinnable battle that you are forced to flee from." Actual dragons are usually fairly late-game here so when Desch pre-emptively said to run I was expecting something like that to happen, but not for it to be this game's version of freaking Bahamut. Benevolent king of the dragons who grants aid to adventurers who show bravery this is not.
As thanks for helping save his ass, Desch gives us the Mini spell, and then we make our escape from the mountain by…
I can't walk under a waterfall without taking damage but I can jump down a mountaintop with zero consequence. I love this game.
Also, that Mini spell is deceptively important, because it's actually plot-related, by which I mean this is about to turn into Final Fantasy and the Minish Cap:
So I teach Mini to Mimi and have her cast it on the whole party, and…
We just.
We just miniaturized ourselves to walk into a tiny village.
What IS this game
God, when a town NPC first mentioned a 'gnome village,' I was expecting D&D gnomes. Like, dwarves. Hobbits. Fun-sized people. But no, it actually meant gnomes as in the tiny fairy beings who can fit in your hand. Living in the middle of… I want to say a maize field?
This is so ridiculous, I love it. I was half-expecting, like, "the sprites are normal but there are environmental cues like a giant flower to tell you that you're small," like in the Minish Cap, but no, they went with the hilarious minified battle sprites. For everything, even people you're talking to.
I fucking knew it. I knew it was drugs!
The gnomes tell me about a bunch of stuff, like a 'Miralnos Bassin' that is home to vikings, or 'Living Woods' that are full of fairies. Honestly the game in these past few towns has been dropping so many references to places elsewhere in the world that it feels much bigger than either previous game, just by anticipation. And in one house, I found a sick gnome who needs an antidote. Thankfully I got some in dungeon chests, so I give him one, and:
In return, he reveals that he too has a fucking SECRET TUNNEL PASSAGE INSIDE HIS HOUSE, WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS SETTING'S ARCHITECTS
You know what, no, hold on, I know exactly what this is reminding me of, let's go back a ways to one of my older works-
Article: 56th offers her chamber. She dug a secret passage which will allow them to escape in case of trouble. 327th is only half surprised, building secret passages is the fad of the times. It started a hundred years ago against the glue-spitting ants. A queen of the Federation, Ha-yekte-douni, had developed an insane obsession with security. She had built for herself an 'armored' forbidden city. Its walls were reinforced with large gravel, stuck in place by termite cement.
The problem was that it only had one exit. Thus when her city was surrounded by the legions of the glue-spitting ants, she was stuck inside her own palace. The glue-spitters had little trouble seizing her and choking her in their dreadful fast-acting glue. Queen Ha-yekte-douni was later avenged and her city freed, but this horrible and stupid end stuck for a long time in the minds of the Belokanians. Ants having the wonderful gift of being able to shape their house with but a stroke of the mandible, everyone tried their hand at building their own little secret passage.
One ant building a secret passage is one thing, a million is quite another. 'Official' corridors began collapsing, undermined by 'private' tunnels. One would enter their own secret tunnel only to enter a maze made out of all the others, to the point that entire neighborhoods became uninhabitable, compromising the every future of Bel-o-kan.
Mother had put a stop to it. Nobody was allowed to build their own personal corridor. But who could control all chambers?
That's right, I am linking my Final Fantasy Let's Play and my Bernard Werber Let's Read. THE OMICRON CINEMATIC UNIVERSE IS COMING AND IT'S UNSTOPPABLE.
Anyway, yes, this dude has a secret passage in his house that leads to the Miralka Basin, home of the vikings. That passage is gnome-sized. It also has random encounters in it. Which means…
I have to fight every battle while miniaturized. Mini is a simple effect: it means my physical attacks deal 1 damage, and my defense is reduced to 1, so I take heavy damage from all enemy attacks. However, my spellcasting is unchanged. This means I am heavily relying on Rushanaq, and to a lesser extent Mimi and Tsugumi, to get through it, while Quaver is just sitting useless.
Of course, the correct move - and I suspect this is what you're intended to do in the NES version of the game where there are no quicksaves and wiping send you way back - would have been to stock up on magic items and give everyone some spells so I can job-swap into a full-caster party. But I had no idea this was coming, so I don't have the magic items for it, and Rushanaq is strong enough to carry. We make it through fine.
Unfortunately, I have another problem. Mainly, we're back to FFI-style magic - Vancian slots. I taught the Mini spell to Mimi because I figured she didn't have anything to do with her lv 2 spell slots, but she actually only has one lv 2 slot. Which means she can't cast Mini again to un-reduce the party. Which means…
I'm stuck this way. I go through most of the viking hideout (they're really just pirates) talking to people like this, which must be hilarious in-setting.
Fortunately the vikings also operate an inn, and I can rest to recover my MP and finally free myself from this curse.
The viking elder refers to the sea beast as the 'Nepto Dragon,' who is meant to slumber eternally but was arisen by the earthquake and is now rampaging wildly. The pirates only have one ship left, but they can't sail it - the dragon destroys anything it spots on the sea. This is, predictably, putting masculinity in a crisis:
It's up to me to save heterosexuality. Dude even offers me his last remaining ship if I kill the dragon, which does raise the question of how he intends to conduct his piratical business without a ship. Well, I suppose he still has all this loot stored with which to buy a new one.
What I haven't looted, anyway. These chests contain Fira, Thundara and Blizzara, and were concealed in a hidden room that wasn't pointed out to me and which I found through good old environmental awareness, so I am very happy to be rewarded for my sense of exploration with a significant upgrade in spell power.
Now, said ship is just waiting for me right outside the vikings' cave. Does that mean that I quicksave and head out to sea just to see what will happen? Yes. Is the result of doing so entirely and predictably fatal? Also yes.
TRI MARTOLOD YAOUANK, LA LA LA-
THIS IS SO NOT TRI YANN
Even with my new higher-tier spells, there's nothing I can do about a monster that kills one character per turn. The fight is a foregone conclusion.
But, just like Bahamut, there's no reason it would be a foregone conclusion, if I decided to just grind for twelve hours in the overworld and confront it at lv 50 or whatever, would it? Like, this thing 'only' deals ~500 damage. I can surely outstat it, if I put in the time and tedium? What would happen then? I'm curious, I'll look it up later.
You know how it goes, we reload and we go back to where we were supposed to go in the first place. There's a temple north of the viking lair, and inside it we find a statue of the Nepto Dragon (honestly, a much more flattering rendition thereof), missing one eye…
Is this…
Is this an actual mini dungeon?
Oh my god how precious.
Also, despite Desch having told me 'you know it would be good to have three Black Mages while miniaturized' at least twice, and the vikings having a magic shop, I just plain completely forget about job changes and just wade in with my current party, making it way harder than it needs to be.
It…
It even comes with its own unique tiny enemies…
SOME OF WHICH DON'T FUCK AROUND
This screenshot wasn't actually a wipe. Rushanaq managed to pull through a victory by the skin of her teeth with everybody else dead.
So of course I reloaded anyway because it would take too many phoenix downs and potions to heal everyone, because being Rushanaq is suffering.
And at the end of the tiny dungeon, is a tiny boss.
Unbelievably scuffed. How am I so bad at this game.
But eventually we pull through and defeat our toughest enemy so far, Literally A Big Rat.
And when we put the jewel back into the statue…
He bequeaths to us something called the 'Fang of Water,' whose purpose is obscure to me right now.
Oooh.
Eyes being the repository of a dragon's soul or power, and dragon eyes being removed, stolen, exchanged, and returned to their owner, is a huge part of draconic lore in FFXIV and features prominently as part of Heavensward's plot. I wasn't expecting it to show up here, though. With his soul returned and the connection to its body (which it, strangely enough, seems to be remote-controlling from this statue), Nepto beseeches us to find what I assume to be the Water Crystal and restore its light, then resumes his eternal slumber.
Hmm. The first crystal we found was the Wind Crystal, right? So, I think we're going to be doing a reverse order of FFI - Air-Water-Fire-Earth.
One really neat thing I'll note that is that the younger vikings only know the beast as "a sea dragon," the elder viking knows old lore about him and refers to it as "the Nepto Dragon," but is unaware that it's supposed to be benevolent - even his knowledge is distorted by time of what is actually "Nepto, the Sea Dragon," a sapient being with some kind of watchful purpose. It's a really neat bit of in-setting context loss, and totally believable as something that would happen over time.
And with this quest complete, the pirates, sorry, vikings do good on their word and hand over the Enterprise to us, allowing us free range of the seas!
And that's it for today.
Man.
This game is delightful.
There's just so much… wild inventivity, both narratively and mechanically? And the game feels so open. There's always a reward for snooping around, for exploring, for being curious, for studying your environment or paying attention to what people are saying. And sometimes the game punishes you for it, like me forgetting to change jobs in the mini dungeon, but that's fair! The obvious solution was there and I was a dumbass. And just the idea of the mini dungeon - of shifting the conditions of gameplay and asking you to adapt - is so interesting and funny. Bahamut picking us up and dropping us in a nest of dragonlings…
And it's going a hundred miles an hour, just bouncing from idea to idea, it's never boring.
I'm loving my time so far.
- Location
- The Great Beyond
- Pronouns
- He/She/They
Behold, the triumphant arrival of Bahamut as an actual gameplay piece. It's great.
Zap Rowsdower
Ex-cultist vagrant
- Location
- Bright lights, big city
- Pronouns
- He/Him
As well as of Bahamut being, while sometimes helpful and recruitable, nevertheless kind of amoral/feral if not outright an asshole instead of the benevolent deity he is in D&D and FF1 - developing his own distinct from D&D traits.
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- Location
- Denmark
- Pronouns
- She/Her
I am genuinely so fucking mad, what the hell. This is literally sexism.
Look, he's just putting food on the table, okay? He's got mouths to feed. Respect the hustle.
- Location
- Great Khanate of Scotland
- Pronouns
- She/Her
The whole shrinking mechanic and everything related to it is so charming
mothematics
How wide is the concept of "you"?
- Location
- the bottom of a coffee cup
- Pronouns
- She/Her
if you don't include Anat in the next games party im going to cancel you by posting receipts from our Geist game, watch out bucko
No but for real this thread is a blast. I'm really enjoying reading along and learning about these old games.
No but for real this thread is a blast. I'm really enjoying reading along and learning about these old games.
- Location
- Singapore
- Pronouns
- Singular They
And over in FFXIV, the Nepto Dragon is reduced to a rare fish.
I did a double-take when I saw the name here, after my efforts in trying to catch one.
Zap Rowsdower
Ex-cultist vagrant
- Location
- Bright lights, big city
- Pronouns
- He/Him
This is the last game with nameless characters until you get to the MMOs. You can change the names of people up through X, but they have predefined canon names and personalities
- Location
- Brittany, France
- Pronouns
- He/Him
I need to tweak my formula though, tbh. I've previously said that it takes me as much time writing an LP update as it does playing through the relevant section, but that was at best true of late game FF2. The last update covered an hour of FF3 gameplay, and took me over three hours to write.
That's not a sustainable rhythm. I imagine it'll taper off as there are fewer immediately/glaringly new things to comment on, but even so. My total play time in FF2 was 21 hours; I can't spent 40 or 50 hours writing about FF3. It's not that it's exhausting or anything, but it consumes literally all my available writing time/focus, so I can't write fiction or anything.
I need to find a way to 'zoom out' and cover more gameplay hours in fewer words, but this is made difficult because my natural impulse is to comment on every little detail I find noteworthy, cool, or amusing. I'm gonna try using fewer pictures and covering events in broader strokes, I guess? IDK.
That's not a sustainable rhythm. I imagine it'll taper off as there are fewer immediately/glaringly new things to comment on, but even so. My total play time in FF2 was 21 hours; I can't spent 40 or 50 hours writing about FF3. It's not that it's exhausting or anything, but it consumes literally all my available writing time/focus, so I can't write fiction or anything.
I need to find a way to 'zoom out' and cover more gameplay hours in fewer words, but this is made difficult because my natural impulse is to comment on every little detail I find noteworthy, cool, or amusing. I'm gonna try using fewer pictures and covering events in broader strokes, I guess? IDK.
should have finished number none girl
Egleris
Vagrant Dragon
- Location
- Italy
Perhaps you could just reduce the update speed? I mean, I'm happy of getting new updates so quickly, but if they take more time to write, maybe just spacing them out more will make it easier on you. I'm personally doubtful that you'll have less to say as the game goes on; if anything, FFIII is far more weighted toward the end than FFII was.
I've also heard good things about voice-to-text programs speeding up the process of writing commentary, but having never tried one myself, I can't vouch for the effectiveness of it.
- Location
- Brittany, France
- Pronouns
- He/Him
That'd be reasonable, but the thing is, I am excited to play these games, so when I don't have anything to do and am looking for some entertainment I'm like, "oh, I'll play more Final Fantasy," and then an hour later I have a hundred screenshots to sort through and I need to write about it or else it'll start building up into a backlog and that's a death spiral.
Zap Rowsdower
Ex-cultist vagrant
- Location
- Bright lights, big city
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Do what works best for you. We're not paying you for this, anything you give us is gravy.
Might we like it more when there's a microscope than when there's a summary? Sure. But if that doesn't work for you, and we're not paying you to go out of your comfort zone, screw us, this is your show. Besides, I trust you'll point out and comment on the important bits.
Might we like it more when there's a microscope than when there's a summary? Sure. But if that doesn't work for you, and we're not paying you to go out of your comfort zone, screw us, this is your show. Besides, I trust you'll point out and comment on the important bits.
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- Location
- Denmark
- Pronouns
- She/Her
you could play more final fantasy with the actual rushanaq boy
Final Fantasy III, Part 4
- Location
- Brittany, France
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Last time on Final Fantasy, we set out to sea.
The first thing I do with my new found freedom is do drugs. By which I mean I eat some Gnomish Bread to get a sense of how many locations can be reached by ship and plan out my next journey. There are about four or five locations in total, which is plenty, and I start out with the closest, a township to the South.
I talk to two old men and they both immediately run away. We're off to an auspicious start.
The game actually replays the 'young boy retreats as you approach, mother steps forward to explain why he's scared bit from FFII, for similar reasons:
The picture that unfolds talking to the inhabitants quickly becomes clear. Soldiers came into town, and seized every able-bodied citizen, presumably to turn them into forced labour as happened in Bafsk in the previous game. What's interesting is that these soldiers bore the brand of King Argus, a character of whom we know little save that Cid spoke of him as a knowledgeable and helpful person wise in the ways of airshipwrighting, which makes this violent raid seem wildly out of character.
Incidentally, something that's been incidental previously but is noticeable now: the game uses the same sprite to cover 'wise old sage' and 'any old man'. After FFI and FFII's circles of plot- and mechanic-explaining sages, it's a little jarring to wander into this town and found these same character models used to represent scared senior citizens running away in fright at my sight.
Well, the most obvious course of action is to follow the trail of the soldiers, who headed south across the desert.
The fuck is that thing.
I can't interact with it - from the way the models overlap, it looks like I'm passing 'underneath' it, I'm guessing it's flying. It's also moving about the map, not static. Something for Cid's next airship to deal with, perhaps?
I nonetheless continue my quest down south, leave the desert, and stumble upon this game's chocobo forest. Yay! Shortly thereafter, I reach…
The edge of the world.
Dang, I half wasn't expecting it. And, hm, that really is a big blue sky full of clouds. I'm growing increasingly convinced this giant floating landmass is in fact only the first map of the game, and there's a world below. It would be an interesting way to return to FFI's flying fortress only massively expanded and twisted around as an early game location.
Fittingly, near the edge of the world, we find the village of the ancients:
As might be expected, the Ancients are full of age-old wisdom and secret lore, such as:
Yeah, dude, I actually would find that extremely believable considering I was staring out of the edge of the world a minute ago.
It is interesting that this means people in general don't know they live on a floating continent? If you'll look at the map I've posted a few times, the inner seas of the floating continent are fully bordered by a ring of landmass - but that ring does not appear to have any settlement on it aside from the Village itself. It's quite possible that the current civilization developing around the inner sea hasn't yet fully explored their own continent.
The floating continent is also artificial. It was lifted out of its original planetary body by the Ancients, and is actively being kept afloat by the 'Tower of Owen' through mysterious means - though I can assume it has to do with drawing on the power of the Wind Crystal, just like the Flying Fortress.
Also there is some backstory for the setting which… Hm.
Okay.
So we have a new take on the Lufenians, whose hubris didn't merely cause the death of their own civilization, but also that of nearly all humanity. We have a disaster caused by the light, using the crystals to harness it only to bring about disaster, which had to be solved by a group of four (!) "warriors from the world of darkness." And just like the Lufenians, their few survivors gathered in a remote settlement, carrying on the memory of their sins.
On one level, this is the first (or second if you're playing the game through older ports and have done Rebirth of Souls) instance of Final Fantasy complicating the light/darkness dichotomy by suggesting too much light can be bad and darkness can have value. It also alludes to a 'work of darkness' whose nature is unknown to me at this time, and draws an implicit but obvious link between them and our 'warriors of light.' At the same time, this is all ancient backstory, and it appears that in the modern day we are dealing with a classic darkness = evil, light = good, so what gives? Should I expect some kind of twist? I'm genuinely curious.
Also on another level it is extremely funny to see laid out in four quick text boxes what will be the direct foundation of a huge plotline in FFXIV. The degree of self-reference in this franchise, and in FFXIV especially, only grows more astounding with each game, especially as this game is already directly calling back to FFI.
Then I race across the world to entertain a kid.
This is no big deal. Chocobos are immune to random encounters and very fast, there are no other settlements on the edge, and the outer ring is a contiguous landmass. It's the affair of a couple minutes, and the kid rewards me with another loaf of gnomish bread.
Having gotten as much as I can from the location (the magic shop sells Sight, which allows me to access the Gnomish Bread effects with a lv 1 cast, and the gear shops have good stuff but too expensive for me at this stage), I head to the next closest location on the map, which turns out to be the Living Woods mentioned a while ago.
So. The fairies dwell within the Living Woods, which appear to be made up of, quite literally, sentient trees. But this magic is sourced in the Elder Tree, and Hein, the royal advisor of Castle Argus, cursed the Elder Tree to uproot itself and turn into a wandering castle. Without its power, the Living Woods are dying - or perhaps merely returning to a natural state in which trees are merely trees and fairies do not exist. Drawing between point A and point B, the reason I wasn't able to find the Argus soldiers and their captive was because this weird flying bramble in the desert is the Elder Tree, Hein's new base of operation from which he sends out his raiding parties to work on some nefarious project. As for King Argus, he is perhaps captive or brainwashed?
Hein is mentioned as using the 'Barrier Shift' spell to shift his… I assume elemental, weakness? That's an interesting cue for a coming boss fight, I imagine.
We continue our exploration of the inner sea in clockwise fashion. Our next step is…
Castle Argus, lying completely empty. Abandoned by all. Not even monsters dwell here. This is mildly uncanny, and I leave quickly.
Next up is, uh…
Frog Tower?
Nothing to see there but more frogs. We leave, and head deeper inland, until we find that place from the intro cutscene!
I do not trust the shape in the water. It's moving. I suspect this is some kind of Kraken or Leviathan or some bullshit.
Note the name, 'Gulgan Gulch' - we're dealing with an inversion of 'Mount Gulg.' One was a peak, the other is a chasm, both share the same etymology. One was a dungeon, the other is a place of wisdom:
This game's own version of the circle of the twelve sages. These 'Gulgan' are a sightless race, dwelling underground, and endowed with foresight. They tell me I bear the power of the Wind Crystal, and must now find each of the Fire, Water and Earth Crystals - which will grant me power in return just as the Wind Crystal did.
Which is nice. Giving a tangible reward for finding each crystal, in the form of new class unlocks, makes it more satisfying to find them. They gave me several hints as to where to go - it seems like the Fire Crystal is in that island to the northwest, sealed off by that giant waterspout next to the Tower of Owen.
The stairwell at the center of the circle leads to a lone Gulgan who has a gift for us:
The spell in question?
You guessed it, it's Toad. This game, I swear.
So we head back to the Tower of Owen, convert the whole party into frogs…
Run from every battle, because toads can't do anything, and finally find a hole in a wall and jump through it (the hole was underwater, hence why Mini wasn't enough).
The recurring motif of this dungeon is that as we progress upwards, the unseen voice from above taunts us with promises of stranding us forever inside the tower, while Desch progressively recovers his memory.
This is such a cool way to do a dungeon. How do you give a dungeon character? Well, you literally have two characters talk as you go through it, one of them going through an accelerated arc. The shit-talking, womanizing Desch increasingly realizes that he's an Ancient, who was kept in stasis within this tower. And at the top of the tower…
Ah-ah. I knew someone called Xande would show up. Not much more information about it, of courseurse, but…
Holy shit, they're going for a colony drop with an entire continent? Yeah, this dude is going for some K/T scale extinction event. We're talking about destroying the entire floating continent and probably most of the world below. We're three-for-three on apocalyptic plots here.
Obviously, Medusa can't be allowed to go with this plan (is she… expecting to survive it, somehow? Or is she just a fanatic?).
Interesting departure from previous Medusas. These were normally portrayed as full standing women with snake-hair, whereas this one appears as a disembodied head shrouded with snakes. She looked humanoid on the previous screen, so I wonder if this is a case of 'turning into my monster form,' or if the rest of the body is just implied.
Medusa is a powerful caster-type foe with an unusually high HP count for one such. Fortunately, her Stare attacks miss, so I don't have to worry about petrification, and her single-damage spells can't outpace Tsugumi's healing; Rushanaq's powerful lv 3 spells do much of the damage required to take out her health, then resorts to using consumables as she runs out of spell slots. Ultimately, the fight ends with my party near full health.
But then, tragedy.
Damn.
I mean, it's a tough call, but he's right. Nobody here knows how to keep the reactor from exploding, and if it blows, it's the entire island and possibly the world dying. It's one of the more dramatic deaths in Final Fantasy so far, and in no small part because holy shit, dude, he locked himself inside a live reactor. I don't think I would have that in me.
And he managed to go out on a pun. RIP, Desch.
With his dying moments, Desch warps us out of the tower, and we watch as the waterspout that blocked off the way to the dwarf island dries up.
Next up: the Fire Crystal.
The first thing I do with my new found freedom is do drugs. By which I mean I eat some Gnomish Bread to get a sense of how many locations can be reached by ship and plan out my next journey. There are about four or five locations in total, which is plenty, and I start out with the closest, a township to the South.
I talk to two old men and they both immediately run away. We're off to an auspicious start.
The game actually replays the 'young boy retreats as you approach, mother steps forward to explain why he's scared bit from FFII, for similar reasons:
The picture that unfolds talking to the inhabitants quickly becomes clear. Soldiers came into town, and seized every able-bodied citizen, presumably to turn them into forced labour as happened in Bafsk in the previous game. What's interesting is that these soldiers bore the brand of King Argus, a character of whom we know little save that Cid spoke of him as a knowledgeable and helpful person wise in the ways of airshipwrighting, which makes this violent raid seem wildly out of character.
Incidentally, something that's been incidental previously but is noticeable now: the game uses the same sprite to cover 'wise old sage' and 'any old man'. After FFI and FFII's circles of plot- and mechanic-explaining sages, it's a little jarring to wander into this town and found these same character models used to represent scared senior citizens running away in fright at my sight.
Well, the most obvious course of action is to follow the trail of the soldiers, who headed south across the desert.
The fuck is that thing.
I can't interact with it - from the way the models overlap, it looks like I'm passing 'underneath' it, I'm guessing it's flying. It's also moving about the map, not static. Something for Cid's next airship to deal with, perhaps?
I nonetheless continue my quest down south, leave the desert, and stumble upon this game's chocobo forest. Yay! Shortly thereafter, I reach…
The edge of the world.
Dang, I half wasn't expecting it. And, hm, that really is a big blue sky full of clouds. I'm growing increasingly convinced this giant floating landmass is in fact only the first map of the game, and there's a world below. It would be an interesting way to return to FFI's flying fortress only massively expanded and twisted around as an early game location.
Fittingly, near the edge of the world, we find the village of the ancients:
As might be expected, the Ancients are full of age-old wisdom and secret lore, such as:
Yeah, dude, I actually would find that extremely believable considering I was staring out of the edge of the world a minute ago.
It is interesting that this means people in general don't know they live on a floating continent? If you'll look at the map I've posted a few times, the inner seas of the floating continent are fully bordered by a ring of landmass - but that ring does not appear to have any settlement on it aside from the Village itself. It's quite possible that the current civilization developing around the inner sea hasn't yet fully explored their own continent.
The floating continent is also artificial. It was lifted out of its original planetary body by the Ancients, and is actively being kept afloat by the 'Tower of Owen' through mysterious means - though I can assume it has to do with drawing on the power of the Wind Crystal, just like the Flying Fortress.
Also there is some backstory for the setting which… Hm.
Okay.
So we have a new take on the Lufenians, whose hubris didn't merely cause the death of their own civilization, but also that of nearly all humanity. We have a disaster caused by the light, using the crystals to harness it only to bring about disaster, which had to be solved by a group of four (!) "warriors from the world of darkness." And just like the Lufenians, their few survivors gathered in a remote settlement, carrying on the memory of their sins.
On one level, this is the first (or second if you're playing the game through older ports and have done Rebirth of Souls) instance of Final Fantasy complicating the light/darkness dichotomy by suggesting too much light can be bad and darkness can have value. It also alludes to a 'work of darkness' whose nature is unknown to me at this time, and draws an implicit but obvious link between them and our 'warriors of light.' At the same time, this is all ancient backstory, and it appears that in the modern day we are dealing with a classic darkness = evil, light = good, so what gives? Should I expect some kind of twist? I'm genuinely curious.
Also on another level it is extremely funny to see laid out in four quick text boxes what will be the direct foundation of a huge plotline in FFXIV. The degree of self-reference in this franchise, and in FFXIV especially, only grows more astounding with each game, especially as this game is already directly calling back to FFI.
Then I race across the world to entertain a kid.
This is no big deal. Chocobos are immune to random encounters and very fast, there are no other settlements on the edge, and the outer ring is a contiguous landmass. It's the affair of a couple minutes, and the kid rewards me with another loaf of gnomish bread.
Having gotten as much as I can from the location (the magic shop sells Sight, which allows me to access the Gnomish Bread effects with a lv 1 cast, and the gear shops have good stuff but too expensive for me at this stage), I head to the next closest location on the map, which turns out to be the Living Woods mentioned a while ago.
So. The fairies dwell within the Living Woods, which appear to be made up of, quite literally, sentient trees. But this magic is sourced in the Elder Tree, and Hein, the royal advisor of Castle Argus, cursed the Elder Tree to uproot itself and turn into a wandering castle. Without its power, the Living Woods are dying - or perhaps merely returning to a natural state in which trees are merely trees and fairies do not exist. Drawing between point A and point B, the reason I wasn't able to find the Argus soldiers and their captive was because this weird flying bramble in the desert is the Elder Tree, Hein's new base of operation from which he sends out his raiding parties to work on some nefarious project. As for King Argus, he is perhaps captive or brainwashed?
Hein is mentioned as using the 'Barrier Shift' spell to shift his… I assume elemental, weakness? That's an interesting cue for a coming boss fight, I imagine.
We continue our exploration of the inner sea in clockwise fashion. Our next step is…
Castle Argus, lying completely empty. Abandoned by all. Not even monsters dwell here. This is mildly uncanny, and I leave quickly.
Next up is, uh…
Frog Tower?
Nothing to see there but more frogs. We leave, and head deeper inland, until we find that place from the intro cutscene!
I do not trust the shape in the water. It's moving. I suspect this is some kind of Kraken or Leviathan or some bullshit.
Note the name, 'Gulgan Gulch' - we're dealing with an inversion of 'Mount Gulg.' One was a peak, the other is a chasm, both share the same etymology. One was a dungeon, the other is a place of wisdom:
This game's own version of the circle of the twelve sages. These 'Gulgan' are a sightless race, dwelling underground, and endowed with foresight. They tell me I bear the power of the Wind Crystal, and must now find each of the Fire, Water and Earth Crystals - which will grant me power in return just as the Wind Crystal did.
Which is nice. Giving a tangible reward for finding each crystal, in the form of new class unlocks, makes it more satisfying to find them. They gave me several hints as to where to go - it seems like the Fire Crystal is in that island to the northwest, sealed off by that giant waterspout next to the Tower of Owen.
The stairwell at the center of the circle leads to a lone Gulgan who has a gift for us:
The spell in question?
You guessed it, it's Toad. This game, I swear.
So we head back to the Tower of Owen, convert the whole party into frogs…
Run from every battle, because toads can't do anything, and finally find a hole in a wall and jump through it (the hole was underwater, hence why Mini wasn't enough).
The recurring motif of this dungeon is that as we progress upwards, the unseen voice from above taunts us with promises of stranding us forever inside the tower, while Desch progressively recovers his memory.
This is such a cool way to do a dungeon. How do you give a dungeon character? Well, you literally have two characters talk as you go through it, one of them going through an accelerated arc. The shit-talking, womanizing Desch increasingly realizes that he's an Ancient, who was kept in stasis within this tower. And at the top of the tower…
Ah-ah. I knew someone called Xande would show up. Not much more information about it, of courseurse, but…
Holy shit, they're going for a colony drop with an entire continent? Yeah, this dude is going for some K/T scale extinction event. We're talking about destroying the entire floating continent and probably most of the world below. We're three-for-three on apocalyptic plots here.
Obviously, Medusa can't be allowed to go with this plan (is she… expecting to survive it, somehow? Or is she just a fanatic?).
Interesting departure from previous Medusas. These were normally portrayed as full standing women with snake-hair, whereas this one appears as a disembodied head shrouded with snakes. She looked humanoid on the previous screen, so I wonder if this is a case of 'turning into my monster form,' or if the rest of the body is just implied.
Medusa is a powerful caster-type foe with an unusually high HP count for one such. Fortunately, her Stare attacks miss, so I don't have to worry about petrification, and her single-damage spells can't outpace Tsugumi's healing; Rushanaq's powerful lv 3 spells do much of the damage required to take out her health, then resorts to using consumables as she runs out of spell slots. Ultimately, the fight ends with my party near full health.
But then, tragedy.
Damn.
I mean, it's a tough call, but he's right. Nobody here knows how to keep the reactor from exploding, and if it blows, it's the entire island and possibly the world dying. It's one of the more dramatic deaths in Final Fantasy so far, and in no small part because holy shit, dude, he locked himself inside a live reactor. I don't think I would have that in me.
And he managed to go out on a pun. RIP, Desch.
With his dying moments, Desch warps us out of the tower, and we watch as the waterspout that blocked off the way to the dwarf island dries up.
Next up: the Fire Crystal.
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- Location
- Brittany, France
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Ricard's sacrifice was cool so I didn't want to single it out, but I was definitely giving it the side-eye while talking about Desch's own heroic sacrifice.
I have mixed feelings about Minwu, because on the one hand the set-up makes some level of sense (he's not sure he can survive breaking the door so he needs the heroes to be there), but also dude literally dies to a door, which, like... C'mon.
Zap Rowsdower
Ex-cultist vagrant
- Location
- Bright lights, big city
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Don't make a drinking game of it, you'll get alcohol poisoning
We haven't even reached the game with the highest heroic sacrifice count yet
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I am a bit surprised at all the FFXIV mentions. Omicron at times sounds like some youth whose first movie was Ready Player One who is now watching some popular older movies. Has that game been an 'I clapped when I saw it'-thing that miraculously turned out - assuming I can trust everyone I have not played it - good all this time?