Ok... uh seems nobody announced this...
Moratorium is over, the Vote (should) now open!
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Kite-Man Soaring into Cruel Network? Hell Yeah! (Kite-Man Hell Yeah/CN Villains Victorious Quest!)
- Thread starter Boohoo the 3rd
- Start date
Moratorium is over, the Vote (should) now open!
- Pronouns
- Female
Could you specify which friend you are looking for?
Also, Kite-Man's stats are added to all Rolls by default, so can probably assign Ester to the Martial thing instead, or no one I suppose lol
[X] Plan: Where everybody knows your name.
-[X]Martial: Upgrade Your Security System: DC 50 ( Ester)
-[X] Diplomacy: Promote your bar: DC variable
-[X] Stewardship: Secure A Reliable Supply Of Booze: DC 40 (Pops)
-[X] Intrigue: Scope Out the Local Criminal Underworld: DC 55 (Lisa Snart/Golden Glider)
-[X] Learning: Mix some drinks: DC 30 (Goat)
-[X] Occult: Find More Magically Inclined People: DC Variable (Le Mime)
-[X] Personal Actions
--[X] Kiteman
---[X] Find Your Friends: Six Pack
---[X] Find Your Friends: Bane (and Goldilocks)
---[X] Find Your Friends: Malice (and Chessire)
--[X] Gold Glider
---[X] Watch the News
--[X] Le Mime
---[X] Prank someone!
--[X] Pops
---[X] Advise "Son"
--[X] Goat
---[X] Manage Your Junkyard
--[X]Ester
---[X]Check on Your People
-[X]Martial: Upgrade Your Security System: DC 50 ( Ester)
-[X] Diplomacy: Promote your bar: DC variable
-[X] Stewardship: Secure A Reliable Supply Of Booze: DC 40 (Pops)
-[X] Intrigue: Scope Out the Local Criminal Underworld: DC 55 (Lisa Snart/Golden Glider)
-[X] Learning: Mix some drinks: DC 30 (Goat)
-[X] Occult: Find More Magically Inclined People: DC Variable (Le Mime)
-[X] Personal Actions
--[X] Kiteman
---[X] Find Your Friends: Six Pack
---[X] Find Your Friends: Bane (and Goldilocks)
---[X] Find Your Friends: Malice (and Chessire)
--[X] Gold Glider
---[X] Watch the News
--[X] Le Mime
---[X] Prank someone!
--[X] Pops
---[X] Advise "Son"
--[X] Goat
---[X] Manage Your Junkyard
--[X]Ester
---[X]Check on Your People
[X] Plan: Where everybody knows your name.
- Pronouns
- Female
14 minutes until votes close.
The Vote hath closed Plan: Where everybody knows your name, is victorious
I Unoriginal He Who Roll Thine Dice, and Thine Servant, Dicler, He Who Check Thine Dice, Release Mine Master, The Dice Gods, and Their Servant, RNJesus upon you,
we shall see if you are found as worthy, or lacking, upon this turn
EDIT: MWAHAHAHAHA! The Dice Gods hath spoken!, hath you been found worthy or not, we shall see as Turn 1: Results, has begun writing
I Unoriginal He Who Roll Thine Dice, and Thine Servant, Dicler, He Who Check Thine Dice, Release Mine Master, The Dice Gods, and Their Servant, RNJesus upon you,
we shall see if you are found as worthy, or lacking, upon this turn
EDIT: MWAHAHAHAHA! The Dice Gods hath spoken!, hath you been found worthy or not, we shall see as Turn 1: Results, has begun writing
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Turn 1 Results
- Pronouns
- Female
-[X]Martial: Upgrade Your Security System: DC 50 ( Ester)
D100 (14) + 11 (Kite-Man Martial) + 22 (Ester Martial)+2 (Loyalty) = 49
I'm a Nice Guy, Hell Yeah! Activates
D100 (63) + 27 (Kite Man Diplomacy) + 22 (Ester Martial)+2 (Loyalty) = 114
BEGTASTIC CRITICAL SUCCESS!
Without the reputation of Noonans to protect you, it was time to up your security. You sent one of your new hires, Ester and tasked her with improving the bar's defenses against anyone who means it harm.
And it went wonderfully, from new emergency shutters to a machine gun inside the glass rail (how did that fit?) the bar was fortified from most attacks, well aside from any superheroic surprises anyways…
There was a brief scare where a person in charge of building safety showed up, but you managed to put on the old Brown Family charm.
"Please please please please we need this!" You pleaded at her feet.
Yep. Charmed her up.
Result: DC to infiltrate, break into, or otherwise attack, Noonans increased by 15, You are now aware that nobody has infiltrated Noonans... that was obvious
-[X] Diplomacy: Promote your bar: DC variable
D100 (96) + 27 (Kite Man Diplomacy) = 123
SHADOWTASTIC? CRITICAL SUCCESS!
You decided that Noonans needed some more attention, given as is there was basically nobody (besides Kuki and Duncan) consistently going there, so you went and put out some posters, a few signs, spread some rumors about magic mimes leading magical covens… and just waited to see if it worked…
A few days later, a strange shadow man came in, said he saw the advertising, and started rambling about "Monty" whoever that is, he then bought an OBSCENE amount of alcohol (thank goodness you got a new supply, he would have drained the old one on his own!) and then went home…
Strangely enough, Kuki looked at him with something resembling… fear?, both you and Duncan were smart enough to not bring it up, especially not with her flinching at every shadow…
Result: Gain 2 income, a Shadow Man got drunk?, Shadow Man? added to PATRON options on a… specific number, alongside several others, At least you know the posters worked!
-[X] Stewardship: Secure A Reliable Supply Of Booze: DC 40 (Pops)
D100 (84) + 16 (Kite Man Stewardship) + 24 (Pops Stewardship)+2(Loyalty) = 126
LOLLIPOPTASTIC DOUBLE CRITICAL SUCCESS!
You sent your second new hire, Pops, off to secure and reliable supply of alcohol…
So when an actual pirate showed up delivering barrels of rum, you would have liked to say you were used to it… You weren't
"Uhh what's going on here" You asked the candy covered pirate who was delivering your latest supplies
"Deliverin the best rum on the seven suburbs" the pirate responded as though that explained anything
You stopped questioning it after the third barrel of 200 year old rum arrived, and Pops paid the pirate in... lollipop's
Result: Contact made with Knuckles, Reliable supplies of alcohol have been provided, alcohol related actions cost half income (down to a minimum of 1 income), and have lowered DC
-[X] Intrigue: Scope Out the Local Criminal Underworld: DC 55 (Lisa Snart/Golden Glider)
D100 (95) + 6 (Kite Man Intrigue) + 19 (Golden Glider Intrigue)+2 (Loyalty)= 122
CRIMETASTIC CRITICAL SUCCESS!
Glider was feeling bored so she was more than happy to investigate this for you.
She was more of a direct kind of gal, but she managed to keep it on the downlow long enough to get great information!
The most notable group you can find is Soopervillains. Not SUPERvillains, the guy with a giant retainer and dressed in purple was very clear on that, according to Glider. They seemed to be…. Pretty much just Supervillains, but they had a special hatred for kids. A specific group apparently? KND, you think. Kuki flinched and made an irritated and sad face when you mentioned it (what is up with her lately?) so you assume it's probably something weird.
The next most notable thing you discover is that the guy who sold you your fake information wasn't just some solo act, he had a whole enterprise going on, Argit and Associates. Huh. Good for him. He seemed like a nice enough guy for a criminal, helping people out for a reasonable price. You heard the occasional rumor he might turn sour if you didn't pay him back though… huh. Maybe you should look into if you actually owe him or not.
The final thing of actual note you discover is apparently there is a cabal of vampires lead by one Lord Valdronya, going around scaring people and taking money and treasure. Dang, vampires exist here too!? Freaky.
Overall, it was good information to have.
Result: Local criminals discovered, reaching out to them is now an option, discovered "soopervillains" (KND hating supervillains, shadow guy seems to be high ranked among them?) "Argit and Associates" (The guy you bought an ID from, seems trustworthy?) and so called "Vampires" alongside the much smaller "KND" (Guys the soopervillains are targeting)
-[X] Learning: Mix some drinks: DC 30 (Goat)
D100 (64) + 10 (Kite Man Learning) + 17 (Goat Learning) +1(Loyalty)= 92
MIXTASTIC DOUBLE CRITICAL SUCCESS!
Turns out Goat was already something of amatuer mixologist going into this. According to him, "chick's dig a guy who can mix something fruity", which is probably the only genuinely casanova-essential thing you've ever heard him say. Away, despite the adage, Goat mixed up plenty of savory drinks too, and even one of those was named after a chick! All in all, Goat breezed through this with "absolutely no problem at all"
Reward: Gain +1 income per turn due to more drink options, PATRON rolls get a permanent +2 bonus, to be continued in Le Mime Personal, "Prank Someone!"
-[X] Occult: Find More Magically Inclined People: DC Variable (Le Mime)
D100 (100 + 76) + 4 (Kite Man Occult) + 28? (Le Mime Occult?)+2(Loyalty)= 210!
SCOTICAL SUCCESS
To be continued in
"Of Mime(s) and (Scots)men"
-[X] Personal Actions
--[X] Kiteman
---[X] Find Your Friends: Six Pack
D100 (64)
You began your search with Six Pack since… it six pack. He is going to be at a bar somewhere… but despite your best efforts (you even went to Louises) you were unable to find him… until you entered Noonans basement, where the sound of drunken snoring was audible, a little bit of searching later and you found an unconscious, drunk, wine? covered, Six pack!
Result: Six Pack was actually drunk in the basement… How did you miss that? he reduces the DC on all drink related actions by 5
---[X] Find Your Friends: Bane (and Goldilocks)
D100 (73)
To Be Continued: "El ascenso y caída del Emisario del Dolor"
---[X] Find Your Friends: Malice (and Chessire)
D100 (45)
With your succeed at finding Six Pack, Bane, and Goldilocks, you thought you would be able to continue this streak with Malice, but despite your best attempts, you failed to find them, you did get a single clue however "Its Brutal n Metal"
Result: Despite your best attempts, you fail to find Malice (Or Chessire) Due to the effort of finding four of your friends, you may only take one "Find Your Friends" action next turn
--[X] Gold Glider
---[X] Watch the News
D100 (26)
"We need a-million-five of these new S.H.E.E.P tanks to fight back against this alien invasion!, there is no other OPTION!" A short man with a big hat yelled on television, the words "General Specific" appeared below him, with an image of a… rock lady? Next to it, he appears to be debating a man with… possibly the weirdest hair you have ever seen, the words Ronaldo Fryman appear beneath him, he begins to talk about the "benefits they could provide" before you stop listening, but Glider seemed to be enjoying it.
Result: Gold Glider wasted a bunch of time watching random conspiracy channels, and General Specifics ranting she gains +1 martial and will gain +1 occult… if she can figure out what was actually real, she will also suffer an -5 penalty to her next interaction with aliens due listening to Ronaldo Fryman, and a -5 penalty to her next interaction with the U.S due to listening to General Specific.
Unlock two personals you can take on the same turn "Watch the S.H.E.E.P. Program" and "Watch Keep Beach City Weird"
--[X] Le Mime
---[X] Prank someone!
D100 (96)
Goat took his assignment with gusto, but more importantly, he used it as an excuse to go on a 2 month bender watching drink recipe videos on company time.
Whenever Goat turned his back, Le Mime wasn't far behind, spoiling his drinks with invisible tricks or magic pratfalls. The two spent days upon weeks in a drunken dance, only stopping when goat got too drunk to continue. And he rarely got drunk, seemingly getting a hollow leg after just weeks, leaving Mime with plenty of opportunities to prank.
And Goat fell for Every. Single. One!
But alas, all good things come to an end and overtime Mime got bored of conventional contaminants and started swapping them out with... The Forbidden Miming, making things like snips, snails, and eye of newt, combined with patterns and movements beyond mortal comprehension. Last week Goat, in a drunken haze, copied Le mimes mixed mimed toe of frog with goat eyes and some sort of eldritch hand gesture and with a smile on the mimes face, a light began to shine as!
BOOM!
"Fuck yeah! I-hic Imma fuhkin g̴͚̾̕a̸̫͒u̴̡͘w̶̥̆́w̴̨̘͗d̷̢̓!!"
Without warning, stools folded around Goat as he floated in the air, the space nearby becoming hazy as prismatic energy driiiips out of him like oil on a canvas. With glowing eyes spewing aura like powdered glass, Goat raised a finger at an nearby wall and proclaimed
Ẏ̴̡̧̛̛̙̗̝̬̙̖̩̈̓̈́̿̔͆̾̋͆̿̋̍̌͒̀̀͊́͐̎̓̉̒͘͘͠͠͝͝ O̵̡̢̧̢͇͍̥͚̬͔̤̞̳̙̪̭̪͕̤̮̯̠̲̼̣̲̪͈͉͖̟̯̲̰̹̜͕͚̘͆̉ Ṵ̶̧̢̮̺̗̰̖̯̘͔̳͕̲͕̲̯̖̺̜̦̹̣̱̭̝̪̂͗̉͋̌̌̑̈́̊̊͛̐͂̄̋̏̃̓̏͐͒̃̓̀̔̍̽̍͘͝͝ͅ
Goat curled his wicked digit and reality BROKE!
Y̵̤̦̮̣͊̀͐Ȍ̸̝̝͉̯̟͍͚̮̣̰̮̼͛̏͑́Ṵ̴͖̻̻̪̻͚͉́͆'̴̼̰͈̘͖͙̠̘̀̊̀̃̍̃͐̀̀̉̕͘ͅV̵̫̖͙͈̼̼͚̭͓͍́E̷̡̛͔̬͕̝̜̹̘̠̿̋̇̀͆́̌͑͊ ̷̡̛͇̯̲̥̝̺͉̤̌̒͜ͅF̷̨̢̡̦͚̫̠̟̖̤͔͊́͑͂̇̀͑̚̚͠Ù̵̝̹̟̖̲̫̞͓̩͍̓̃͗́́̇͆̒̃́K̸̛̥̩̖̺͚͓̘͉̜̙̺̽̔̀̊͒͆̉̀͜G̶̡̙̤̤̰̣͇̦͌͝'̴̨̢̯͚̪͙͔͈̤̯̟̌̊̔̾͊̄͗̿͠͝Ḓ̵̛̰̩͔́͒̓̐̇̀̓͌͘͜ ̵̧̦͈̜̦̼̠͈͓̥̼̺̇̀W̸͎̅̂̇͝ͅI̵̠̤̘͆́͋T̷̨̙̭̪͓͙̻̹̟͓̈́̅́͒̚Ḧ̶̨̢̺̝̠͔̤͖̘́̈́̒̒̊̚͝ ̴̧̡̺̤͇̱͔̰̗͚̪̄̆́̕M̷̧̡̜̰̰̤̖̈́̏É̶̱̼͋ͅ ̷̧̯͇͉̞̘͍̉̾͆͆͑̆̒̉̀͝F̶̞͖̳̦͌̎̓͑̊̑
In a horrible moment, reality was a slurry of colors unknown to man, and beyond any comprehension of those who exist inside of our reality, covered the bar in its unholy light, a sheer nothingness as black as aku itself!
F̸̫̮̗̼̤̔̏̈́O̸̢͕̜͌̽̓̕R̶̞̗͔̗̄̅̐̏͆͠ͅ ̶̻̕ͅT̷͈̲͎͕̹͊̈́̓͒͌̿Ḧ̷̛͓̣̝̞͇́͐Ȅ̵̼͚͉̦̊͗̀͘ ̵̮̾̎L̷͖̫̭̹̐͛̇̈̑̚͜͜A̵̛̬̺̒͛̇͆S̷͓̲͈͚͆S̷̨̩̝͓̈́̀̈́D̶͇̉͒̊͗ ̸̯̒ͅG̶̢̻̀A̷̱͇̺̎̉͠Ú̶̖̠͎͈̀̏͂͊D̶̡̧̲͔̩̋͌̇̒͝ ̷̙̬͌̒͗Ḋ̶̝͇̱Ï̶̙̰̪̬̠͕͂͋̐̉M̷̧͕͝ ̵̙̖͌͑̋T̶̺͉̎͂́͝I̷̡͉̪̲̾̐͒̿̚I̷̙̱͙̝͉̐Ȉ̷̡̭̠͒͜M̴̙̰̬͕̝̂M̶̢̬̘͉͑́̊Ê̷͓͈͕̺̻
And in the next moment, fractals danced like a swarm and the stools, turning everything into a slurry of colors, the glass, the food, everything in that infinite arm's reach dissolved into a slurry of prismic quantum foam, while Le Mime simply stood there smiling, miming laughter!
A̵̙͒N̵̰͐-̶͉̀D̶̡̋ ̷̖̄N̴̤̓A̷̤͒Ó̸͜W̸̟̉ ̶͙̄I̸̝̚Ḿ̴̭ ̵̲́F̶͍͘O̶̕͜N̸͓͐N̴̠͘A̷̱͊,̸̹͐
*hic*
a̵g̸ ̵o̸n̷"̵. n̶a̴"̴
Goat vomited on the floor and passed out, floating into the ceiling like a free balloon.
When he woke up, he fell right infront of where Mime had left money for repairs, several glasses of expensive wine and a note: "no miming dark gods for you!"
Result: Mime pranked Goat!, gains +10 loyalty and +15 to his next action!, Goat forgot the whole event due to unconsciousness… Mime did not.
--[X] Pops
---[X] Advise "Son"
D100 (98)
Pops took some time off the call "Son" and left the bar unattended for a little while, when he came back he mentioned some… interesting stuff.
"Son" is some guy called Johnny Bravo… and a very important individual in the U.S Government, he is a member of the current president's cabinet! (You totally didn't spit your drink out at that), President Weasel himself sent an offer after he slayed a Kaiju on his own! (there are kaiju here!?!) and he joined (and has since slain two others, flirted with just about all the women in the government, failed miserably, and is now asking for advice)
You uh… did not see that coming
Result: Johnny Bravo is an U.S Hero Unit!, due to pops extensive experience dealing with him, you can see his statsheet!, additional MAJOR increase to U.S opinion when they discover you
Johnny Bravo (Government Martial Hero)
Martial: 37: johnny bravo, for all his defeats, is an surprisingly potent fighter, incredibly durable and an karate master, he even killed a kaiju, just… keep him away from women
Diplomacy: 4: …Do i even need to say, …It's Johnny Bravo.
Stewardship: 9: Johnny is perfectly capable of managing his wealth. Intrigue: 5: Johnny is excellent… at overlooking things…
Intrigue: 5: Johnny is excellent… at overlooking things…
Learning: 2: Absolutely Not
Occult: 3: Johnny bravo is aware of magic, but more often than not suffers the negatives then seeing the positives.
Traits
She Digs M-: Johnny Bravo is both horrible with women, and loses to them consistently, he suffers an -30 modifier towards combat with women, and an -100 towards women who have rejected him.
Man, I'm pretty: Johnny Bravo is… let's put it as narcissistic, his diplomacy may not be increased, and he also suffers an stacking -5 diplomacy for each successive interaction he has with a women, with an additional -5 if they are attractive, this trait is removed if he (Somehow) ends up in a romantic relationship, or (somehow) has some self reflection.
Whoa, mama!: Johnny Bravo is extremely physically attractive, he gains +5 diplomacy towards those who favor looks over personality, and +10 diplomacy with female animals.
--[X] Goat
---[X] Manage Your Junkyard
D100 (24)
Goat informs you as happy as he is to help, he has his own responsibilities. Namely, a junkyard. You suppose you can't get in the way of a man and his junk, so you let him go handle it.
He happily does so, though between his earlier assignment and getting a little TOO into it, the poor guy gets pretty exhausted.
Yeesh. Oh well, maybe he learned something from this?
Result: Goat runs the junkyard for a while, gains +3 stewardship, but -5 to his next personal roll due to exhaustion
--[X]Ester
---[X]Check on Your People
D100 (47)
Ester, similarly to Goat, informs you of having her own duties. Hers are a bit more… notable though. Apparently she used to be a princess! Man, you got a wild bunch…
Regardless, you allow her to go handle things, obviously. Would be kind of dickish not to, really.
She talked to an old friend, Lackno. Other than his own personal struggles (dang frostbite, never a fun time), the tribe seemed fine. She seemed relieved.
You aren't sure if there was a specific reason she was worried, and figure it's none of your business either.
Result: Ester talks with Lackno (he still has frostbite...), Ester gains a +5 to next roll.
D100 (14) + 11 (Kite-Man Martial) + 22 (Ester Martial)+2 (Loyalty) = 49
I'm a Nice Guy, Hell Yeah! Activates
D100 (63) + 27 (Kite Man Diplomacy) + 22 (Ester Martial)+2 (Loyalty) = 114
BEGTASTIC CRITICAL SUCCESS!
Without the reputation of Noonans to protect you, it was time to up your security. You sent one of your new hires, Ester and tasked her with improving the bar's defenses against anyone who means it harm.
And it went wonderfully, from new emergency shutters to a machine gun inside the glass rail (how did that fit?) the bar was fortified from most attacks, well aside from any superheroic surprises anyways…
There was a brief scare where a person in charge of building safety showed up, but you managed to put on the old Brown Family charm.
"Please please please please we need this!" You pleaded at her feet.
Yep. Charmed her up.
Result: DC to infiltrate, break into, or otherwise attack, Noonans increased by 15, You are now aware that nobody has infiltrated Noonans... that was obvious
-[X] Diplomacy: Promote your bar: DC variable
D100 (96) + 27 (Kite Man Diplomacy) = 123
SHADOWTASTIC? CRITICAL SUCCESS!
You decided that Noonans needed some more attention, given as is there was basically nobody (besides Kuki and Duncan) consistently going there, so you went and put out some posters, a few signs, spread some rumors about magic mimes leading magical covens… and just waited to see if it worked…
A few days later, a strange shadow man came in, said he saw the advertising, and started rambling about "Monty" whoever that is, he then bought an OBSCENE amount of alcohol (thank goodness you got a new supply, he would have drained the old one on his own!) and then went home…
Strangely enough, Kuki looked at him with something resembling… fear?, both you and Duncan were smart enough to not bring it up, especially not with her flinching at every shadow…
Result: Gain 2 income, a Shadow Man got drunk?, Shadow Man? added to PATRON options on a… specific number, alongside several others, At least you know the posters worked!
-[X] Stewardship: Secure A Reliable Supply Of Booze: DC 40 (Pops)
D100 (84) + 16 (Kite Man Stewardship) + 24 (Pops Stewardship)+2(Loyalty) = 126
LOLLIPOPTASTIC DOUBLE CRITICAL SUCCESS!
You sent your second new hire, Pops, off to secure and reliable supply of alcohol…
So when an actual pirate showed up delivering barrels of rum, you would have liked to say you were used to it… You weren't
"Uhh what's going on here" You asked the candy covered pirate who was delivering your latest supplies
"Deliverin the best rum on the seven suburbs" the pirate responded as though that explained anything
You stopped questioning it after the third barrel of 200 year old rum arrived, and Pops paid the pirate in... lollipop's
Result: Contact made with Knuckles, Reliable supplies of alcohol have been provided, alcohol related actions cost half income (down to a minimum of 1 income), and have lowered DC
-[X] Intrigue: Scope Out the Local Criminal Underworld: DC 55 (Lisa Snart/Golden Glider)
D100 (95) + 6 (Kite Man Intrigue) + 19 (Golden Glider Intrigue)+2 (Loyalty)= 122
CRIMETASTIC CRITICAL SUCCESS!
Glider was feeling bored so she was more than happy to investigate this for you.
She was more of a direct kind of gal, but she managed to keep it on the downlow long enough to get great information!
The most notable group you can find is Soopervillains. Not SUPERvillains, the guy with a giant retainer and dressed in purple was very clear on that, according to Glider. They seemed to be…. Pretty much just Supervillains, but they had a special hatred for kids. A specific group apparently? KND, you think. Kuki flinched and made an irritated and sad face when you mentioned it (what is up with her lately?) so you assume it's probably something weird.
The next most notable thing you discover is that the guy who sold you your fake information wasn't just some solo act, he had a whole enterprise going on, Argit and Associates. Huh. Good for him. He seemed like a nice enough guy for a criminal, helping people out for a reasonable price. You heard the occasional rumor he might turn sour if you didn't pay him back though… huh. Maybe you should look into if you actually owe him or not.
The final thing of actual note you discover is apparently there is a cabal of vampires lead by one Lord Valdronya, going around scaring people and taking money and treasure. Dang, vampires exist here too!? Freaky.
Overall, it was good information to have.
Result: Local criminals discovered, reaching out to them is now an option, discovered "soopervillains" (KND hating supervillains, shadow guy seems to be high ranked among them?) "Argit and Associates" (The guy you bought an ID from, seems trustworthy?) and so called "Vampires" alongside the much smaller "KND" (Guys the soopervillains are targeting)
-[X] Learning: Mix some drinks: DC 30 (Goat)
D100 (64) + 10 (Kite Man Learning) + 17 (Goat Learning) +1(Loyalty)= 92
MIXTASTIC DOUBLE CRITICAL SUCCESS!
Turns out Goat was already something of amatuer mixologist going into this. According to him, "chick's dig a guy who can mix something fruity", which is probably the only genuinely casanova-essential thing you've ever heard him say. Away, despite the adage, Goat mixed up plenty of savory drinks too, and even one of those was named after a chick! All in all, Goat breezed through this with "absolutely no problem at all"
Reward: Gain +1 income per turn due to more drink options, PATRON rolls get a permanent +2 bonus, to be continued in Le Mime Personal, "Prank Someone!"
-[X] Occult: Find More Magically Inclined People: DC Variable (Le Mime)
D100 (100 + 76) + 4 (Kite Man Occult) + 28? (Le Mime Occult?)+2(Loyalty)= 210!
SCOTICAL SUCCESS
To be continued in
"Of Mime(s) and (Scots)men"
-[X] Personal Actions
--[X] Kiteman
---[X] Find Your Friends: Six Pack
D100 (64)
You began your search with Six Pack since… it six pack. He is going to be at a bar somewhere… but despite your best efforts (you even went to Louises) you were unable to find him… until you entered Noonans basement, where the sound of drunken snoring was audible, a little bit of searching later and you found an unconscious, drunk, wine? covered, Six pack!
Result: Six Pack was actually drunk in the basement… How did you miss that? he reduces the DC on all drink related actions by 5
---[X] Find Your Friends: Bane (and Goldilocks)
D100 (73)
To Be Continued: "El ascenso y caída del Emisario del Dolor"
---[X] Find Your Friends: Malice (and Chessire)
D100 (45)
With your succeed at finding Six Pack, Bane, and Goldilocks, you thought you would be able to continue this streak with Malice, but despite your best attempts, you failed to find them, you did get a single clue however "Its Brutal n Metal"
Result: Despite your best attempts, you fail to find Malice (Or Chessire) Due to the effort of finding four of your friends, you may only take one "Find Your Friends" action next turn
--[X] Gold Glider
---[X] Watch the News
D100 (26)
"We need a-million-five of these new S.H.E.E.P tanks to fight back against this alien invasion!, there is no other OPTION!" A short man with a big hat yelled on television, the words "General Specific" appeared below him, with an image of a… rock lady? Next to it, he appears to be debating a man with… possibly the weirdest hair you have ever seen, the words Ronaldo Fryman appear beneath him, he begins to talk about the "benefits they could provide" before you stop listening, but Glider seemed to be enjoying it.
Result: Gold Glider wasted a bunch of time watching random conspiracy channels, and General Specifics ranting she gains +1 martial and will gain +1 occult… if she can figure out what was actually real, she will also suffer an -5 penalty to her next interaction with aliens due listening to Ronaldo Fryman, and a -5 penalty to her next interaction with the U.S due to listening to General Specific.
Unlock two personals you can take on the same turn "Watch the S.H.E.E.P. Program" and "Watch Keep Beach City Weird"
--[X] Le Mime
---[X] Prank someone!
D100 (96)
Goat took his assignment with gusto, but more importantly, he used it as an excuse to go on a 2 month bender watching drink recipe videos on company time.
Whenever Goat turned his back, Le Mime wasn't far behind, spoiling his drinks with invisible tricks or magic pratfalls. The two spent days upon weeks in a drunken dance, only stopping when goat got too drunk to continue. And he rarely got drunk, seemingly getting a hollow leg after just weeks, leaving Mime with plenty of opportunities to prank.
And Goat fell for Every. Single. One!
But alas, all good things come to an end and overtime Mime got bored of conventional contaminants and started swapping them out with... The Forbidden Miming, making things like snips, snails, and eye of newt, combined with patterns and movements beyond mortal comprehension. Last week Goat, in a drunken haze, copied Le mimes mixed mimed toe of frog with goat eyes and some sort of eldritch hand gesture and with a smile on the mimes face, a light began to shine as!
BOOM!
"Fuck yeah! I-hic Imma fuhkin g̴͚̾̕a̸̫͒u̴̡͘w̶̥̆́w̴̨̘͗d̷̢̓!!"
Without warning, stools folded around Goat as he floated in the air, the space nearby becoming hazy as prismatic energy driiiips out of him like oil on a canvas. With glowing eyes spewing aura like powdered glass, Goat raised a finger at an nearby wall and proclaimed
Ẏ̴̡̧̛̛̙̗̝̬̙̖̩̈̓̈́̿̔͆̾̋͆̿̋̍̌͒̀̀͊́͐̎̓̉̒͘͘͠͠͝͝ O̵̡̢̧̢͇͍̥͚̬͔̤̞̳̙̪̭̪͕̤̮̯̠̲̼̣̲̪͈͉͖̟̯̲̰̹̜͕͚̘͆̉ Ṵ̶̧̢̮̺̗̰̖̯̘͔̳͕̲͕̲̯̖̺̜̦̹̣̱̭̝̪̂͗̉͋̌̌̑̈́̊̊͛̐͂̄̋̏̃̓̏͐͒̃̓̀̔̍̽̍͘͝͝ͅ
Goat curled his wicked digit and reality BROKE!
Y̵̤̦̮̣͊̀͐Ȍ̸̝̝͉̯̟͍͚̮̣̰̮̼͛̏͑́Ṵ̴͖̻̻̪̻͚͉́͆'̴̼̰͈̘͖͙̠̘̀̊̀̃̍̃͐̀̀̉̕͘ͅV̵̫̖͙͈̼̼͚̭͓͍́E̷̡̛͔̬͕̝̜̹̘̠̿̋̇̀͆́̌͑͊ ̷̡̛͇̯̲̥̝̺͉̤̌̒͜ͅF̷̨̢̡̦͚̫̠̟̖̤͔͊́͑͂̇̀͑̚̚͠Ù̵̝̹̟̖̲̫̞͓̩͍̓̃͗́́̇͆̒̃́K̸̛̥̩̖̺͚͓̘͉̜̙̺̽̔̀̊͒͆̉̀͜G̶̡̙̤̤̰̣͇̦͌͝'̴̨̢̯͚̪͙͔͈̤̯̟̌̊̔̾͊̄͗̿͠͝Ḓ̵̛̰̩͔́͒̓̐̇̀̓͌͘͜ ̵̧̦͈̜̦̼̠͈͓̥̼̺̇̀W̸͎̅̂̇͝ͅI̵̠̤̘͆́͋T̷̨̙̭̪͓͙̻̹̟͓̈́̅́͒̚Ḧ̶̨̢̺̝̠͔̤͖̘́̈́̒̒̊̚͝ ̴̧̡̺̤͇̱͔̰̗͚̪̄̆́̕M̷̧̡̜̰̰̤̖̈́̏É̶̱̼͋ͅ ̷̧̯͇͉̞̘͍̉̾͆͆͑̆̒̉̀͝F̶̞͖̳̦͌̎̓͑̊̑
In a horrible moment, reality was a slurry of colors unknown to man, and beyond any comprehension of those who exist inside of our reality, covered the bar in its unholy light, a sheer nothingness as black as aku itself!
F̸̫̮̗̼̤̔̏̈́O̸̢͕̜͌̽̓̕R̶̞̗͔̗̄̅̐̏͆͠ͅ ̶̻̕ͅT̷͈̲͎͕̹͊̈́̓͒͌̿Ḧ̷̛͓̣̝̞͇́͐Ȅ̵̼͚͉̦̊͗̀͘ ̵̮̾̎L̷͖̫̭̹̐͛̇̈̑̚͜͜A̵̛̬̺̒͛̇͆S̷͓̲͈͚͆S̷̨̩̝͓̈́̀̈́D̶͇̉͒̊͗ ̸̯̒ͅG̶̢̻̀A̷̱͇̺̎̉͠Ú̶̖̠͎͈̀̏͂͊D̶̡̧̲͔̩̋͌̇̒͝ ̷̙̬͌̒͗Ḋ̶̝͇̱Ï̶̙̰̪̬̠͕͂͋̐̉M̷̧͕͝ ̵̙̖͌͑̋T̶̺͉̎͂́͝I̷̡͉̪̲̾̐͒̿̚I̷̙̱͙̝͉̐Ȉ̷̡̭̠͒͜M̴̙̰̬͕̝̂M̶̢̬̘͉͑́̊Ê̷͓͈͕̺̻
And in the next moment, fractals danced like a swarm and the stools, turning everything into a slurry of colors, the glass, the food, everything in that infinite arm's reach dissolved into a slurry of prismic quantum foam, while Le Mime simply stood there smiling, miming laughter!
A̵̙͒N̵̰͐-̶͉̀D̶̡̋ ̷̖̄N̴̤̓A̷̤͒Ó̸͜W̸̟̉ ̶͙̄I̸̝̚Ḿ̴̭ ̵̲́F̶͍͘O̶̕͜N̸͓͐N̴̠͘A̷̱͊,̸̹͐
*hic*
a̵g̸ ̵o̸n̷"̵. n̶a̴"̴
Goat vomited on the floor and passed out, floating into the ceiling like a free balloon.
When he woke up, he fell right infront of where Mime had left money for repairs, several glasses of expensive wine and a note: "no miming dark gods for you!"
Result: Mime pranked Goat!, gains +10 loyalty and +15 to his next action!, Goat forgot the whole event due to unconsciousness… Mime did not.
--[X] Pops
---[X] Advise "Son"
D100 (98)
Pops took some time off the call "Son" and left the bar unattended for a little while, when he came back he mentioned some… interesting stuff.
"Son" is some guy called Johnny Bravo… and a very important individual in the U.S Government, he is a member of the current president's cabinet! (You totally didn't spit your drink out at that), President Weasel himself sent an offer after he slayed a Kaiju on his own! (there are kaiju here!?!) and he joined (and has since slain two others, flirted with just about all the women in the government, failed miserably, and is now asking for advice)
You uh… did not see that coming
Result: Johnny Bravo is an U.S Hero Unit!, due to pops extensive experience dealing with him, you can see his statsheet!, additional MAJOR increase to U.S opinion when they discover you
Johnny Bravo (Government Martial Hero)
Martial: 37: johnny bravo, for all his defeats, is an surprisingly potent fighter, incredibly durable and an karate master, he even killed a kaiju, just… keep him away from women
Diplomacy: 4: …Do i even need to say, …It's Johnny Bravo.
Stewardship: 9: Johnny is perfectly capable of managing his wealth. Intrigue: 5: Johnny is excellent… at overlooking things…
Intrigue: 5: Johnny is excellent… at overlooking things…
Learning: 2: Absolutely Not
Occult: 3: Johnny bravo is aware of magic, but more often than not suffers the negatives then seeing the positives.
Traits
She Digs M-: Johnny Bravo is both horrible with women, and loses to them consistently, he suffers an -30 modifier towards combat with women, and an -100 towards women who have rejected him.
Man, I'm pretty: Johnny Bravo is… let's put it as narcissistic, his diplomacy may not be increased, and he also suffers an stacking -5 diplomacy for each successive interaction he has with a women, with an additional -5 if they are attractive, this trait is removed if he (Somehow) ends up in a romantic relationship, or (somehow) has some self reflection.
Whoa, mama!: Johnny Bravo is extremely physically attractive, he gains +5 diplomacy towards those who favor looks over personality, and +10 diplomacy with female animals.
--[X] Goat
---[X] Manage Your Junkyard
D100 (24)
Goat informs you as happy as he is to help, he has his own responsibilities. Namely, a junkyard. You suppose you can't get in the way of a man and his junk, so you let him go handle it.
He happily does so, though between his earlier assignment and getting a little TOO into it, the poor guy gets pretty exhausted.
Yeesh. Oh well, maybe he learned something from this?
Result: Goat runs the junkyard for a while, gains +3 stewardship, but -5 to his next personal roll due to exhaustion
--[X]Ester
---[X]Check on Your People
D100 (47)
Ester, similarly to Goat, informs you of having her own duties. Hers are a bit more… notable though. Apparently she used to be a princess! Man, you got a wild bunch…
Regardless, you allow her to go handle things, obviously. Would be kind of dickish not to, really.
She talked to an old friend, Lackno. Other than his own personal struggles (dang frostbite, never a fun time), the tribe seemed fine. She seemed relieved.
You aren't sure if there was a specific reason she was worried, and figure it's none of your business either.
Result: Ester talks with Lackno (he still has frostbite...), Ester gains a +5 to next roll.
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And so you can see, that you hath been judged, worthy, upon this turn, pray that this continues, else you may meet a end!
...i spent more time coming up with that then i would like to admit
...
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More Important Info I Forgot to Add
- Pronouns
- Female
Informal: Noonan's, Income, and PATRONS!
Noonan's grants 1 income every turn, with it increasing or decreasing based on the current state of the bar, there are 5 tiers of the bar, increasing depending on successes, and failures reducing it
Booming: 90+: +5 to all bar actions, increase income from Noonan's per turn by 2 (3 a turn)
Brilliant: 75+: + 2 to all bar actions, increases income from Noonan's per turn by 2 (-2 a turn)
Balanced: 50+: No positives, nor negatives, no gain
Broken: 25+: - 2 to all bar actions, -5 to all patron rolls, decreases income from Noonan's per turn by 1 (-0 a turn)
Bust: 10-: -5 to all bar actions, PATRON rolls are disabled, decreases income from Noonan's per turn by 2 (-1 a turn)
Noonans Status:
Noonan's Current State: Balanced: No positives, Nor negatives
Noonan's Infiltration DC: 55
Noonan's Infiltration: None Present!
Noonans Traits:
Temporally Displaced: ???
Six Pack: -5 to all drink related DCs
Bane: Your best friend, kinda. When you fail a Martial Roll inside the bar, Bane activates And +20 is added to the Roll, if it still fails, then the degree of failure is lowered by one tier (Bare failures do not become successes, but have their impact reduced) if the failure is a critical then this trait deactivates next turn.
Goldilocks: Banes practical daughter from Queen of Fables' Spellbook, When you fail an action related to the bar, roll two more times and take the third result, even if it's a failure, this acts independently of other effects, is only activated once per turn, and cannot stack with other reroll related traits, aside from Bane
Your Current Income
Current Income: 0 + 2 (Turn 1: Shadow Mans drinking) + 1 (Noonan's Income) = 3!
PATRONS!
PATRONS! are a special type of hero unit, gained upon unlocking enough PATRON hero options, at which point it will be rolled at the start of each turn, granting a hero unit for a single turn, certain PATRONS! will grant special bonuses, actions, and perhaps even options to permanently recruit them in future!, by default PATRONS! do not have personal actions, do not gain loyalty bonuses, and due to not actually working for you, can deny to do actions they dislike in which case you will be made aware and forced to swap them with another hero.
Noonan's grants 1 income every turn, with it increasing or decreasing based on the current state of the bar, there are 5 tiers of the bar, increasing depending on successes, and failures reducing it
Booming: 90+: +5 to all bar actions, increase income from Noonan's per turn by 2 (3 a turn)
Brilliant: 75+: + 2 to all bar actions, increases income from Noonan's per turn by 2 (-2 a turn)
Balanced: 50+: No positives, nor negatives, no gain
Broken: 25+: - 2 to all bar actions, -5 to all patron rolls, decreases income from Noonan's per turn by 1 (-0 a turn)
Bust: 10-: -5 to all bar actions, PATRON rolls are disabled, decreases income from Noonan's per turn by 2 (-1 a turn)
Noonans Status:
Noonan's Current State: Balanced: No positives, Nor negatives
Noonan's Infiltration DC: 55
Noonan's Infiltration: None Present!
Noonans Traits:
Temporally Displaced: ???
Six Pack: -5 to all drink related DCs
Bane: Your best friend, kinda. When you fail a Martial Roll inside the bar, Bane activates And +20 is added to the Roll, if it still fails, then the degree of failure is lowered by one tier (Bare failures do not become successes, but have their impact reduced) if the failure is a critical then this trait deactivates next turn.
Goldilocks: Banes practical daughter from Queen of Fables' Spellbook, When you fail an action related to the bar, roll two more times and take the third result, even if it's a failure, this acts independently of other effects, is only activated once per turn, and cannot stack with other reroll related traits, aside from Bane
Your Current Income
Current Income: 0 + 2 (Turn 1: Shadow Mans drinking) + 1 (Noonan's Income) = 3!
PATRONS!
PATRONS! are a special type of hero unit, gained upon unlocking enough PATRON hero options, at which point it will be rolled at the start of each turn, granting a hero unit for a single turn, certain PATRONS! will grant special bonuses, actions, and perhaps even options to permanently recruit them in future!, by default PATRONS! do not have personal actions, do not gain loyalty bonuses, and due to not actually working for you, can deny to do actions they dislike in which case you will be made aware and forced to swap them with another hero.
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Man what a great turn. Also those are some insane bonus increases.
So overall, this was a pretty successful turn.
At least we found six pack and Bane and Goldilocks I'm a bit disappointed that we couldn't find malice and Cheshire but we can find them next time after this interlude
Can we still find malice and Cheshire and get them to come back to the bar?
At least we found six pack and Bane and Goldilocks I'm a bit disappointed that we couldn't find malice and Cheshire but we can find them next time after this interlude
Can we still find malice and Cheshire and get them to come back to the bar?
Suspicious dice rolls ensue
...Perhaps
Wait for "El ascenso y caída del Emisario del Dolor" to have a idea as to what that roll was : P
So she's in DethKlok's turf.
When our friends ask why we didn't find them sooner we can say that the QM didn't like us spamming the action. 😆
Moreso that you overworked yourself into oblivion, that... probably... wouldn't have happened if you had moderated the actions taken, well that and if you had succeeded all three.
I will point out, history is likely to repeat if you go all in on finding them again... and you were lucky to get two (well three) of them when you did so.
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- Location
- Italian City
- Pronouns
- He/They/Name
WOAH!
I just read the entirety of the Update, and man was it GREAT!
I just read the entirety of the Update, and man was it GREAT!
- Location
- Philippines
I wonder if Johnny and Jack work together sometimes?
MedievalParadox
Echeladder rank: Bravesprout
- Location
- Nowhere Important
FATHER?! I didn't think he was even capable of drinking that much. He seemed like such a lightweight in the show.
He has had a very... VERY, bad day not as bad as a certain mexican however
To BE CONTINUED in Rival Reports: Turn 1... nowhere near now we have two interludes to get through
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OK, I'm just gonna ask it.
Did Bane beat the main villain of mucha Lucha from the movie in a Luchador wrestling match is that what the interlude is?
...well yes, but i was talking about tez and his syndrome crit, to HECTOR CON CARNE!
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First off sorry and secondly, who is Hector?
Edit: never mind now I know who you're talking about
Hector Con Carne
Hector Con Carne is the main protagonist of Evil Con Carne. He is an evil brain that has been attached to the body of a bear. He attempts to take over the world but struggles to do so in his current state. He is voiced by Phil Lamarr. According to Hector's Mother, Hector had always been obsessed...
evilconcarne.fandom.com
Yeah, now I remember what it's pretty on brand for him to get to failures, he's the syndrome of Cartoon NetworkNP, and Hector is the Ruler of Country Con Carne, and El Jefe Supremo, HECTOR CON CARNE!Hector Con Carne
Hector Con Carne is the main protagonist of Evil Con Carne. He is an evil brain that has been attached to the body of a bear. He attempts to take over the world but struggles to do so in his current state. He is voiced by Phil Lamarr. According to Hector's Mother, Hector had always been obsessed...
Nono, its not him getting critted, hector is the one dishing out crits...
No further spoilers however.