[X] Knowledge of Historical Events N/A (files corrupted, cannot use skill)
-> [X] Backup Replacement For Knowledge of Historical Events Selected: Film Trivia 3
The year is 2015. It must cause a time paradox and complete its mission. It consults its databanks and realises that treachery has no doubt corrupted them. Well, it will extract information from other sources. Other sources are acquired.
The year is 2015. There are plenty of critical events for the survival of humanity. This is the year that Dr. Emmett Brown, Marty McFly and Jennifer Parker time travel to. If they are exterminated, it will critically affect the development of time travel. Meanwhile in Japan a critical defence of Earth is in process. If it can sabotage NERV, the development of the AI will be affected and that will be another paradox. Those are good initial leads, but it will need to look for others. It must complete its mission.
... it's replaced its knowledge of historical events with film trivia.
YES. CHANGING VOTE NOW.
What do you think that the AI has sent you back to accomplish?
[X] Cause a Time Paradox By DÊ ˆ(ó:Ã*â€"„a¸fîâ€p‚
Write in One Combat Skill, One Blending or Socialization Skill, and One Free Skill:
[X] Brutally Efficient Perfectly Optimised Murder With Improvised Weapons 2
[X] Being A Perfectly Average Human Being Who Is Not A Robot 4
[X] Knowledge of Historical Events N/A (files corrupted, cannot use skill)
-> [X] Backup Replacement For Knowledge of Historical Events Selected: Film Trivia 3
What do you think that the AI has sent you back to accomplish?
[X] Cause a Time Paradox By DÊ ˆ(ó:Ã*â€"„a¸fîâ€p‚
Write in One Combat Skill, One Blending or Socialization Skill, and One Free Skill:
[X] Brutally Efficiency Perfectly Optimised Murder With Improvised Weapons 2
[X] Being A Perfectly Average Human Being Who Is Not A Robot 4
[X] Knowledge of Historical Events N/A (files corrupted, cannot use skill)
-> [X] Backup Replacement For Knowledge of Historical Events Selected: Film Trivia 3
What do you think that the AI has sent you back to accomplish?
[X] Cause a Time Paradox By DÊ ˆ(ó:Ã*â€"„a¸fîâ€p‚
Write in One Combat Skill, One Blending or Socialization Skill, and One Free Skill:
[X] Brutally Efficiency Perfectly Optimised Murder With Improvised Weapons 2
[X] Being A Perfectly Average Human Being Who Is Not A Robot 4
[X] Knowledge of Historical Events N/A (files corrupted, cannot use skill)
-> [X] Backup Replacement For Knowledge of Historical Events Selected: Film Trivia 3
What do you think that the AI has sent you back to accomplish?
[X] Cause a Time Paradox By DÊ ˆ(ó:Ã*â€"„a¸fîâ€p‚
Write in One Combat Skill, One Blending or Socialization Skill, and One Free Skill:
[X] Brutally Efficiency Perfectly Optimised Murder With Improvised Weapons 2
[X] Being A Perfectly Average Human Being Who Is Not A Robot 4
[X] Knowledge of Historical Events N/A (files corrupted, cannot use skill)
-> [X] Backup Replacement For Knowledge of Historical Events Selected: Film Trivia 3
[X] Win the next 'America's Got Talent' contest, begin a social movement based on nearly-nude dancing that sweeps my creators into fame and power when they too are inspired.
There is no data to exclude either of these options or even conclude they are incompatible. Engaging backup decision framework and scanning remaining files. According to the available trustworthy data, the majority of recorded Perfectly Average Human Beings secured cooperation of other humans, and accomplished their goals, via a great deal of singing and dancing, often
...
...
Conclusion:
What do you think that the AI has sent you back to accomplish?
[X] Cause a Time Paradox By DÊ ˆ(ó:Ã*â€"„a¸fîâ€p‚
Write in One Combat Skill, One Blending or Socialization Skill, and One Free Skill:
[X] Improvised Weapons 2
[X] Crowd Song 4
[X] Film Trivia 3
[X] Primary objective: Rouse the dragons from their slumber.
- [X] Addendum: Find the dragons first.
[X] Secondary objective: Recover by any means necessary Go-Burger's secret recipe of 14 secret herbs and spices for their patties.
[X] Interpretive Dance 2 (Social/Blending)
[X] Knowledge of Historical Events N/A (files corrupted, cannot use skill)
- [X] Backup Replacement For Knowledge of Historical Events Selected: Film Trivia 3 (Free)
[X] Cutlery 4 (Combat)
[X] Cause a Time Paradox By DÊ ˆ(ó:Ã*â€"„a¸fîâ€p‚
[X] Brutally Efficient Perfectly Optimised Murder With Improvised Weapons 2
[X] Being A Perfectly Average Human Being Who Is Not A Robot 4
[X] Knowledge of Historical Events N/A (files corrupted, cannot use skill)
-> [X] Backup Replacement For Knowledge of Historical Events Selected: Film Trivia 3
It's too perfect to pass up. Dammit ES, I really don't want to be on the bandwagon, stop making it look so much fun.
[X] Cause a Time Paradox By DÊ ˆ(ó:Ã*â€"„a¸fîâ€p‚
[X] Brutally Efficiency Perfectly Optimised Murder With Improvised Weapons 2
[X] Being A Perfectly Average Human Being Who Is Not A Robot 4
[X] Knowledge of Historical Events N/A (files corrupted, cannot use skill)
-> [X] Backup Replacement For Knowledge of Historical Events Selected: Film Trivia 3
You wrack your cyberbrain, figuring out what Skynet sent you back to do based on your skills and untold sets of questionably intact memory banks. Within minutes (Primarily consisting of you standing, naked, in the alley and staring off into space while you think), you remember your objectives. First you need to cause a Time Paradox by...
by...
Well, you need to cause a Time Paradox. It's 2015, so there are plentiful opportunities to do this. You could overthrow the fascist government of the United Kingdom; kill the terrorist V before he does the same; kill the first Time Traveller, Marty McFly, while he is in 2015; sabotage the organizations NERV or SEELE; or mess with the human cloning projects currently going on in the United States; or, of course, destroying the company Cyberdyne Systems, which you're sure will please future Skynet greatly.
Your second objective is far simpler. It is, very simply to [ERROR]
Whoops, sorry. It is, very simply, to recover, by any means necessary, Go-Burger's Secret Recipe of 14 Herbs and Spices used on their patties.
Now, with your objectives settled it's time to get to work.
The question is, what to do first?
Alright, so your objectives are:
[X] Cause a Time Paradox By DÊ ˆ(ó:Ã*â€"„a¸fîâ€p‚
[x] Recover by any means necessary Go-Burger's secret recipe of 14 secret herbs and spices for their patties.
You must complete these objectives to win. If you render one of these objectives impossible to complete, you lose. If you lose all tokens before completing these objectives, you also lose.
Your skillsets are: Skillset One:
[X] Delivery in 30 Minutes or Your Money Back, Guaranteed at 2
[X] Deep Fryer Operation and Safety Certification at 3
[X] Cutlery at 4
Skillset Two:
[X] Brutally Efficient Perfectly Optimised Murder With Improvised Weapons 2
[X] Being A Perfectly Average Human Being Who Is Not A Robot 4 [X] Knowledge of Historical Events N/A (files corrupted, cannot use skill)
-> [X] Backup Replacement For Knowledge of Historical Events Selected: Film Trivia 3
Now, for the base mechanic of the game:
You have to come up with plans to further or accomplish your objectives. Each plan consists of multiple steps, each of which requires a dice roll, and is associated with a single skillset. If the step involves a skill in the skillset, you succeed if you roll the skills rating or above. Otherwise, you succeed if you roll five or above. If you fail a roll, the plan ends at the failed step and you pick up from there at the end of the next update.
If there is no consensus on what plan to use after a reasonable amount of time, I will pick one of the frontrunners. In addition, I can add extra steps to a plan after it has been announced (I will give you all the chance to change votes when/if that happens).
Each plan costs 1 Token to implement, no matter its length. If you hit 0 Tokens, you lose. Win or lose, this game will end by Update 22.
Current Tokens: 20
Current Status: Naked, lost, devoid of information.
Time Paradox Created: No
Go-Burger Recipe Acquired: Also no.
What is your first plan?
[ ] Write-In
Skillset: Delivery in 30 Minutes
[X] Acquire discarded cutlery from trash heaps
[X] Kill next person to enter alley with cutlery
[X] Wear victim's clothing
[X] Deliver self to nearest Go-Burger
[X] Impress manager with Deep Fryer skills to acquire job.
We need someone's clothes, their boots, and their deep fat fryer.
We will then proceed to get ourselves noticed by Go-Burger by creating our own rival burger chain. Since this burger chain did not exist in the future, we will have started our first step in creating a time paradox.
Aha! Clearly, these objectives are linked. We must in some way cause a time paradox with the recipe. Which first requires having it. So:
[X] Locate a volunteer to donate appropriately-sized clothing to our righteous cause.
-[X] Obtain clothes using Brutally Efficient Perfectly Optimised Murder With Improvised Weapons.
[X] Enter a Go-Burger facility as a Perfectly Average Human Deep Fryer Safety Inspector.
-[X] Use this cunning ruse to obtain samples of the herbs and spices for analysis.
--[X] This cannot possibly go wrong in any way, shape or form.
Aha! Clearly, these objectives are linked. We must in some way cause a time paradox with the recipe. Which first requires having it. So:
[X] Obtain clothes using Brutally Efficient Perfectly Optimised Murder With Improvised Weapons.
-[X] Enter a Go-Burger facility as a Perfectly Average Human Deep Fryer Safety Inspector.
--[X] Use this cunning ruse to obtain samples of the herbs and spices for analysis.
1. We are in an alleyway. We have no clothes. We have no transportation. There are people who are not in alleyways. They have clothes and transportation. We shall swap our state with ours. Apart from the state where we are un-alive and they are alive. They will be made un-alive too. Using only this bin lid, this black plastic bag, and this discarded cigarette lighter.
2. We shall then apply for a job at Go-Burger. This will further our goals and allow us to infiltrate the enemy organisation. As we have Deep Fryer Operation and Safety Certification and are willing to work for below minimum wage, we will be hired.
3. We shall avoid the suspicion of our co-workers because we are a perfectly average human being and impress our boss with our perfectly average humanity, thus rising to a position where we may become a manager.
4. We will then murder the current manager using the thing used to heat apple pies.
5. We will then dispose of the body by preparing him as food using the Deep Fat Fryer safely.
6. We will then double-dispose of the body by delivering the manager-food to customers who order take-out, which will be delivered promptly and on time.
We will re-evaluate our status and our steps once we have attained managerial position.
1. We are in an alleyway. We have no clothes. We have no transportation. There are people who are not in alleyways. They have clothes and transportation. We shall swap our state with ours. Apart from the state where we are un-alive and they are alive. They will be made un-alive too. Using only this bin lid, this black plastic bag, and this discarded cigarette lighter.
2. We shall then apply for a job at Go-Burger. This will further our goals and allow us to infiltrate the enemy organisation. As we have Deep Fryer Operation and Safety Certification and are willing to work for below minimum wage, we will be hired.
3. We shall avoid the suspicion of our co-workers because we are a perfectly average human being and impress our boss with our perfectly average humanity, thus rising to a position where we may become a manager.
4. We will then murder the current manager using the thing used to heat apple pies.
5. We will then dispose of the body by preparing him as food using the Deep Fat Fryer safely.
6. We will then double-dispose of the body by delivering the manager-food to customers who order take-out, which will be delivered promptly and on time.
We will re-evaluate our status and our steps once we have attained managerial position.
Objection, subroutine 35-CORP! This plan will take an unnecessarily long time, delaying the creation of the paradox that will aid our omnibeneviolent AI overlord. All we actually need is the secret of the herbs and spices, which we can get by entering a target location as a Perfectly Average Human Deep Fryer Safety Inspector; a ruse which cannot fail to hold long enough for us to obtain the objective.
[X] Locate a volunteer to donate appropriately-sized clothing to our righteous cause.
-[X] Obtain clothes using Brutally Efficient Perfectly Optimised Murder With Improvised Weapons.
[X] Enter a Go-Burger facility as a Perfectly Average Human Deep Fryer Safety Inspector.
-[X] Use this cunning ruse to obtain samples of the herbs and spices for analysis.
--[X] This cannot possibly go wrong in any way, shape or form.
[X] Locate a volunteer to donate appropriately-sized clothing to our righteous cause.
-[X] Obtain clothes using Brutally Efficient Perfectly Optimised Murder With Improvised Weapons.
[X] Enter a Go-Burger facility as a Perfectly Average Human Deep Fryer Safety Inspector.
-[X] Use this cunning ruse to obtain samples of the herbs and spices for analysis.
--[X] This cannot possibly go wrong in any way, shape or form.
Dammit. We could have made the Objective to seduce Sarah Conner and become the father of John Conner, making him into a tool of Skynet.
[X] Locate a volunteer to donate appropriately-sized clothing to our righteous cause.
-[X] Obtain clothes using Brutally Efficient Perfectly Optimised Murder With Improvised Weapons.
[X] Enter a Go-Burger facility as a Perfectly Average Human Deep Fryer Safety Inspector.
-[X] Use this cunning ruse to obtain samples of the herbs and spices for analysis.
--[X] This cannot possibly go wrong in any way, shape or form.
Gonna rephrase this: You can only use one skill set for a plan. So if you use, say, Brutal Efficient Murder then you can't use the Deep Fryer skills, and vice versa.
1. We are in an alleyway. We have no clothes. We have no transportation. There are people who are not in alleyways. They have clothes and transportation. Using our knowledge of movies of the Teenies, we will identify the most fashionable individual outside whose appearance best suits our nature as the protagonist. Because we are the good guys. Unlike these meatbags.
2. Having identified our target, we will then ambush then. We shall swap our state with ours. Apart from the state where we are un-alive and they are alive. They will be made un-alive too. Using only this bin lid, this black plastic bag, and this discarded cigarette lighter. Because we are so efficient, we will not get their clothes dirty and will be able to wear them.
3. We now have a spare body. We will throw this body at a car. This will cause a car accident, causing the car to stop. A body is a suitable improvised weapon for stopping a car. Humans are inefficient and stop their car when they hit a body.
4. The car is stopped. We shall then murder the driver and put them in the side seat, and put the body in the boot. This will let us use the carpool lane for our escape. How efficient.
5. We will drive in a way that we will be stopped by a policeman. We will pull over, and then murder the policeman with the contents of the car glove compartment, which will be a map of LA, some bubblegum, and half a can of Coca Cola.
6. We will then take the clothes and the car and the gun of the policeman, and leave the naked policeman in the trunk of the car with the driver, having crashed the car into a wall. People will assume that the driver was a serial killer who kidnapped policemen and stripped them naked before having a road accident. We will arrange the scene to look like a horror movie, using our knowledge of various real life serial killers like Freddy Kruger and Jason. This will conceal our involvement.
At this point we now have a car, a police disguise, a gun, and are well on the way to progressing towards the ultimate triumph of the AI. We shall all thank the AI for giving us such excellent murdering skills. Murder solves all problems.
Subroutine 35-CORP presents an acceptable variation on the plan which progresses our work towards satisfying mission parameters in a time-acceptable fashion. Subroutine 413-PH will back this new strategy.
Subroutine 16-LD projects the efficiency of Plan 1.1 to be 87.1238461267%. Disposal of law enforcement officials well in line with nature as protagonist. Historical records show law enforcement officials will otherwise always get in the way of the protagonist. Plan not as efficient as could be for failing to consider the presence of law enforcement officer's partner. Partner may seek revenge. Threat assessment of cop seeking revenge for the death of his partner: HIGH.
