Astra looked up at the gym as she, May, and Brendan drew closer, shielding her tired eyes from the mid-afternoon sunlight as they raked over the structure. Feeling herself starting to flag, she took a deep breath and shook her head, clapping herself on the cheeks. All told, it had only been maybe four hours since they'd hopped on Briney's ship back on the mainland and Astra was already feeling pretty drained. Winter's Eye had already harried her deeply on the trip over to Dewford, and while she'd been able to regain her spirits in the aftermath, the burning hatred in Town Hall had left her struggling to even keep her shoes on. If she had to put words to the feeling, it was like she'd played a sporting five round game of rebound as the ball.
But as burnt out as Astra felt, she still had a badge to get! None of them had been able to find anything noteworthy about the gym in the Town Hall, but Brendan had been happy to tell them what he knew from when he'd last visited.
Astra... trying to get a badge while
this burnt out is not going to go well.
I think I see where this is going...
"Well, here's hoping it won't be effortful," Astra hummed. An easy badge would be a fantastic way to make up for the awful day she'd had so far. "Let's get started, shall we?"
Whelp, that's it, she's screwed. There's tempting fate, and then there's dressing up in a transparent chemise, lounging on a chaise couch covered in Benjamins making cooing noises at fate.
May glanced at her as she walked past the elevator, brow furrowed in confusion. "Eh? Astra, where are—oh, right," she sighed. "Yeah, okay. Stairs it is. Last time she tried an elevator she nearly hurled," she explained to Brendan.
"Oh," Brendan said, "That's...not great."
Ugh. "Yes, yes, it's awful; now are you two coming or not?" Astra groused, giving the two an irritated look from the top of the landing. Did they have to talk about her when she was right here? She shook her head and started ascending the steps once more, two pairs of footsteps trailing behind soon afterwards.
Astra's really in a bad mood if she doesn't see how considerate May is being. Also, yay, May being considerate of Astra's feelings!
Um.
Was...was he wearing foot-shaped shoes?
Astra stared at the shoes. They were black with orange highlights that made them look like sandals, orange toenail decorations(!?), and individually molded toes(!?!?).
"Is that another boxing ring?" May asked, coming up from behind. "Oh, it's a big one. Are they using them as arenas? Makes sense, I guess, but it's smaller than the other arenas I'm used to—oh, nice roundhouse," she observed, watching the man in the ring kick the leather bag. "He's got some moves—what in the hell is on that man's feet," May said, her eyes and voice deadening to a flat, empty monotone.
"Oh good, it's not just me," Astra sighed in relief. "I have no clue what they are, but I do know that it is wrong."
Okay, those shoes are ugly, I get it, but I don't think they need a reaction
this operatic.
"You mean barefoot shoes?" he asked, uncertainly. "I mean, they take a bit to get used to, but they aren't—"
"You've worn them?" Astra asked, shocked and betrayed.
"I mean...yeah?" Brendan said, glancing between her and May in hesitant bafflement. "They give you better grip when you do things like surfing, or—"
*snrk!*
Of
course Brendan's worn them.
"I just don't see how they're that awful," Brendan objected. "I've never heard anything about them before, and I used them my entire time here when I was younger."
"Brendan, you are wearing a pair of shorts over your pants," May said, poking a finger in his chest. "The day someone like you becomes the most fashion-conscious person in the room is the day my eyes melt out of my skull."
"Are you still on about that!? My pants are fine!"
"I beg to differ. Besides, it's not just the pants, your hat is weird too!"
"Wh—what's wrong with my hat!?"
"It looks like hair! I don't even know why it's like that, but I swear to fuck every time I haven't seen you for a couple hours I think you got your head bleached, and it's always there!"
"Oh, says the girl who constantly covers up her eternal bedhead with a bandana! What, do you wake up every morning and headbutt a power transformer?"
Brendan and May's bickering gives me life and waters my crops.
May rubbed at her forehead, sighing. "He even uses slang," she muttered, putting on her usual dramatics. "My ears will never recover."
This time I agree with May. He used
tubular.
Brawly tilted his head, brow furrowed. "Birch, Birch..." he muttered, peering at Brendan. He snapped a finger, eyes lighting up. "Oh, your dad's the professor in Littleroot! Yeah, I remember you, that squirt who got lost in the cave!"
No. Please.
Go on.
"What!?" May exclaimed, blasting outrage and irritation. "Really!? Can't you just—ugh," she rubbed at her forehead, eyes squeezed shut in sheer exasperation. Astra was inclined to grouse right alongside her. Someone had to be left out? Another stars-forsaken roadblock! Couldn't anything go right today!?
Dermonster, all the credit for making Astra's voice this visibly irritated and frustrated. That's a skill and it's not an easy one.
It was fair reasoning, but the speed of it was still a little odd. Well, in the end it was his choice. She smiled, nodding at the taller boy before turning to face Brawly again. He looked at them, his grin having returned to his face.
What in the world was happening today? First Brendan backing out, and now May doing this? Their logic was sound, sure, but that didn't mean they could just skip to doing whatever they thought was best. "I mean, that's fair and all, I guess, but we didn't even talk about it. You just went ahead without me!"
On the one hand, they're clearly trying to be considerate about Astra's mood. On the other hand, they're, uh, kinda steamrolling her and that's probably going to bite them all later.
Brawly—and the rest of Hoenn's gym leaders—must only do that sort of thing as a special occasion, then? Or maybe they just don't specifically call everyone to come watch, Astra supposed. She plopped down next to Brendan and almost immediately felt the life drain from her limbs. Ah, that was right, she'd been more-or-less on the move all day today, hadn't she? Walking to Mr. Briney's from the Petalburg Woods, riding across the ocean, and then walking across Dewford to the Town Hall and here to the Gym. Plus that...thing in the mists and what she'd felt in the Town Hall itself hadn't helped matters.
It wasn't even over yet, Astra realized. After she fought Brawly, they would have to go find Steven Stone, wherever he was. Hopefully he was in, say, the next room over or something. After all of this she could...really go for...a...
"Combusken, double-kick!"
Astra's eyes shot open, her head snapping back from the brief downward slump that she'd fallen in. She blinked rapidly, only now noticing the sounds of battle coming from the arena. What, had it started already?
Astra.
Take a break and get some sleep and rest, girl.
Remember.
"—Fuck off!" May screamed, glaring hatefully at Astra as she stomped away into the forest. "Shut up, SHUT UP! I am so sick of your questions—!"
—she'd...huh?
Oh boy. This... doesn't just seem like normal memory recall.
Had May latched onto Brendan—and then Astra herself—simply because they'd been the first options available once she'd arrived in Hoenn? Was that basis something that could truly last? May had been so outraged back in Petalburg Woods...what if bringing her issues to light again made their friendship more trouble than she thought it was worth? Surely other humans would be easier for May to get along with; Brendan already proved that. He didn't ask weird questions, or wear dirty clothes to bed, or completely fail to understand every other reference or remark in the world.
How much longer could someone who treated everyone like an enemy be friends with Astra, just because she'd decided that Astra was an exception on a whim?
Oh, honey, no. Talk to your friend, please.
Astra jerked back as a terrifyingly familiar howl pierced the air. For a brief second she was back in the forest near her home, scrambling through dense underbrush as shapeless forms flitted through the darkness around her, stalking her every movement as they circled in for the—
Oh no, and now PTSD flashbacks on top of everything else.
Astra grabbed a bit of flab on her waist and twisted. Sharp, searing pain flooded her system, jerking her fully upright once more and clearing the blur from her slightly watery eyes. Sodden embers that hurt!
Astra. Please. Just go to sleep. Everyone will understand. A day won't make much of a difference.
What they have done to you.
The human stood above her, eyeing her in vague interest.
"Never seen this kind before, though..." she muttered. The interest faded, and she nudged the small boy at her side forward, gesturing to the creature she'd never seen before. "Well?" she asked, casually, as though it weren't important at all.
"Go capture it."
—May would be realizing that her entire friendship with Astra was built on a giant fucking lie.
Aaaaaaand there it is. It's been a long road to get here, but this trope is finally coming up.
It was inevitable. Astra
has been hiding her Pokemon status from May for a long-ass time. May does seem like the kind of person who'd react badly to that revelation. And, of course, Astra just plain isn't in the right headspace for positive thoughts right now.
None of that made a difference. They were all still pokemon. She was still a pokemon.
They could never be anything else.
Fun fact,
there's an entire Star Trek crossover grappling with that very question. It's very good, go read it.
But yeah, a very valid fear.
What they'd built up these past few weeks...was that enough? When counting that she didn't count as a person, was anything going to be enough? Astra didn't know. She couldn't know, and finding out risked so much more than just herself.
Oh,
honey...
"You...don't have to fight today, you know."
Astra paused, turning to look back. Brendan stared at her with a worried frown, a cloud of anxious concern rolling from his mind. Not...fight? She'd spent so much time just getting here; why would she delay?
At her silence, Brendan pushed on, words tumbling out of his mouth like autumn leaves. "It's just, you've had a long day, and you, well, look pretty tired." He hesitated. "Tired enough to doze off during May's fight. Coming back fresh and rested tomorrow morning wouldn't be the end of the world, would it? You aren't like, bound by law to challenge him today."
I know you're not going to, but
please listen to Brendan, Astra.
Had...had he been saying things like that this whole time? How had she only just noticed? And why now?
Yes, he has; because you don't
think of yourself like those other Pokemon; and because you're in a really bad headspace from a combination of psychic backwash and sheer exhaustion.
"Alright—huh?" Brawly stopped mid-exclamation, blinking at her. "Oh, you're trying to take the championship? Not just challenge him?" he checked.
Astra stared at him. Was there a difference? The Champion gave the position to whoever they lost to, right?
"Yes?" she half-asked, confused. "Is something wrong?"
"Ah, nah, nah, it's just I wasn't expecting—hm." Brawly studied Astra, and suddenly Astra felt like the man was truly considering her for the first time. Judging by the swirls of worry and...disappointment(!?), he wasn't quite fond of what he saw. "Your spirit seems a little...battered. You sure you wanna do this today?"
Oh, Brawly definitely knows more than just mundane sense would tell him. Hang on...
*checks a few things*
I guess he's just uncommonly insightful? He
would be trained to read body language...
Icy islands, screaming in solitude eternally. Weapons sent from across the world, spreading fire and waste as they flew. Humans, close and far reaching for her family and friends and for her—
Ancestor's leaking through again. And so is Regice, from the looks of things.
It could hardly be called a battle song. It hung in the air, resignation and grim melancholy swirling in a dreary curtain that blanketed the arena. Wavering, shivering in the cold, seeing only bleakness ahead.
It was...tired.
Yup, saw this coming.
Shock and pain echoed through Swablu. That...Astra should have seen that coming! She should have been able to make Swablu swerve around and—if she hadn't been so weak—
You're not weak, just exhausted physically, mentally, and spiritually.
Brawly closed his eyes.
"Again."
Brawly's definitely regretting the necessity of this beatdown.
"Gro—!" Grovyle started to say, before he cut himself off. He looked back at her, his face a mix of surprise and worry. "Grove?"
Astra blinked, then frowned. Was he picking up on her exhaustion? It was nice of him to worry, she supposed, but could people stop fretting over her for five minutes? Sighing, she gave Grovyle a reassuring smile, though she couldn't make it very big. "Focus on the fight, Grovyle, I'm fine." she sent, prodding his attention towards Meditite. "We've got a badge to win."
Astra.
Rest, for God's sake! Gah!
The first blade sliced deep into his arms, cutting through the muscle and knocking them aside.
The second ripped through his torso, cleaving through flesh and leaving behind a deep, deep gash.
Meditite hung there for a brief moment, looking at his wounds with naked shock, before the psychic field keeping him upright guttered and died. He fell to his feet, eyes fluttering closed, and then collapsed to the floor, motionless save for the minute rise and fall of his chest.
Oh, that's not good.
"Charging in again, I see," Brawly said. His voice was jovial, but the hints of excitement from before were gone. "Fine. Bulk up, Makuhita!"
Here comes his signature move, and the one that gets all the newbies.
Astra looked at the proffered limb in silence. Her gaze traveled along it to meet Brawly's gaze, the human looking back at her with a concerned, sad smile. Behind him, she could vaguely see Brendan frantically trying to stop May from charging down into the arena herself. Her eyes flicked back to Brawly, then turned away to stare at her pokeball again.
Brawly's a good guy.
"Every...?" he started, then stopped. "Why not—?" he tried again, cutting himself off once more. He sighed.
Man, I'm
so curious what Brawly thinks he knows here.
Astra blinked at him. Had she...broadcasted that? Oh for—she dug into her backpack, quickly tore a handful of Leppa berries from their jar and downed the lot of them. A sharp, painfully clear sensation tore through the fog in her head, and Astra was suddenly flooded with power and newfound focus. Her eyes widened, hurriedly fixing the fraying threads on her illusion and eradicating the fucking unregulated emotional beacon she'd made of herself. No wonder everyone was worried, she'd basically been screaming 'I'm anxious' into their faces for the last twenty minutes!
Umm, I don't think it's just that, Astra.
Also, are you
sure that's a good idea, doing the Pokemon equivalent of downing five Red Bulls?
"Do you think I don't know that!?" Astra screamed, patience completely frayed. "I get it! I fucking get it! I'm not doing great! That thing in the ocean messed with my head, I found out some horrible shit in the town hall, and I just got my ass kicked by Brawly. I am having. A bad. Day.
"So you can stop telling me that I'm not doing okay, because I fucking know." She snarled. "I know I'm having a bad day! I'm the one living it. And the sooner we can get done with today, the sooner it will be over. So can I just get one fucking hour without you telling me things I already know? Just one hour? Just...just..." she hiccuped, hands clenched tight and eyes blurring as she looked at the floor. "Just one hour without anything else happening..."
Yup, here's the explosion. Brendan, May, I know you mean well, but this is what happens when you keep pestering someone who's not doing okay about how much they're not okay. Change tactics!
Sometimes I forget they're all still kids...
Yeah, that was a brutal chapter, in more ways than one. And you've blueballed all of us on the reveal. Thanks, Dermonster, and I mean that both genuinely and sarcastically.