Synopsis: Events are placed after the Girl und Panzer movie. It's set three months after the...
Girls und Panzer - For Glory, Praise and Honor
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Prologue
DawnofWar32
War is coming. Prepare yourselves!
- Location
- Butuan City, The Philippines
Synopsis: Events are placed after the Girl und Panzer movie. It's set three months after the University match and the girls are preparing for the nationals, once again. Miho has shown signs of mental fatigue that has affected her performance on the grounds. She seeks help from a visiting counselor from another country. Will she be able to come to grips with her past? WILL BE LESS TANKS.
Uploader's note: This fanfic and its OCs were created by an author who goes by the username of "Anime Psychologist", and this is crossposted with his permission. Girls und Panzer belongs to Actas. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: I honestly don't know how this is going to end up. But after watching Girls und Panzer and reading all the fanfioction I decided to make something. No promises on the update schedule but if this story gets traffic then maybe I'll be inclined to write more. For now, this is a trial run.
Events are places after the Girls und Panzer movie. It's set three months after the University match and the girls are preparing for the nationals, once again.
Obviously, not all the things are sunshine and rainbows. Miho has shown signs of mental fatigue that has affected her performance on the grounds. After conferring with a doctor (with the diagnosis not being a physical problem), it's discovered it is emotional distress so she seeks help from a visiting international counselor, hired by MEXT to tend to the emotional and mental well-being of the school.
Hopefully, this clears some stuff up. I'm keeping some elements a secret so I hope you get the prologue.
FYI: I haven't written in a while so forgive me if I mess up somewhere, k? Thnxs.
It was the evening on the carrier ship of Ōarai Girl's Academy. The sea breeze mixed with the lights of an ending of a busy day. Hardly anyone, save for those who were on the Public Morals Committee patrolling the grounds, was in the main building. In the darkened halls, the sunlight clashed with the windows in the long hallway. All the rooms were vacant, save for one.
The room was a staff office. Very simple, bookshelves full of books talking about topics from special needs education to providing emotional support. A computer on a large desk, with papers scattered all over. Also, a couch with two small red pillows hid in the corner of the room beside a coat rack.
In the middle sat two individuals. One, a petite girl, with short auburn hair sporting a neat Ōarai uniform. Her brown eyes looking towards the floor, she wore a pained expression. Her hands clenched on each leg, taking hold of her skirt, as she sat and was visibly shaking. Breathing slightly heavily, her eyes welled up with tears that ran down her face.
On the other side was a man. Black short hair with brown eyes. Clean shaven, he wore what would be a light blue checkered t-shirt and jeans. His hands were folded, his eyes filled with concern and sadness.
You could cut the tension in the room. After a few moments, the girl slowly shook her head.
"I can't...," she mumbled to herself. "I'm not..."
"You can't?" asked the man. "You can't feel? Can't you be sad? Can't you be happy? You can't be upset, angry? Because if I were in your position, that is what I would be feeling. Miho, you can feel these things."
"But my friends," Miho answered, looking at him with her tear-filled eyes. "Everyone. What will they say?"
"Right now, we are focused on you. This place... is not a place of judgement. No one will condemn you or think less of you. Here, you are free to express yourself in whichever way you see fit."
Miho stared at the floor again and wiped her face with her hand. She nodded.
"It's okay to feel these emotions you have right now. If you want to scream, then scream. If you want to swear, then by all means. If you want to cry..."
Miho took a deep breath. Soon her expression changed from sadness to anger. With tears streaking down her face, she made a fist and raised her arm slightly. Slamming it on her leg, she did it again, with a grunt.
And again.
And again.
The man watched as she did this. She had never shown emotion like this before. To express oneself is to be human. To say you have no emotion would be lying to oneself. Everyone, especially the young, needs an outlet; a chance to let loose and say something.
To say, "I need help" or "I need to talk to someone." This is something Miho obviously have not done before.
"Why?" Miho asked in a whisper. "Why me?"
The man leaned slightly towards her.
"Why am I feeling this way?" She looked at the man, awaiting an answer.
"What are you feeling right Encountered Raskel the god of celebrationnow, Miho?"
"I feel upset. Upset that I lost everything. Upset how everyone judged me for what I did!" As she said this, her voice was rising and she began to breathe heavily again. "My home, my sister, who I am. Just because I wanted to save them! Why then! Why was I punished! Why was it me?!"
At this point, she was practically yelling. The man did or said nothing. He simply listened.
"Why didn't my sister defend me from mother that time?! Why does my mother treat me the way she does! Dis she hate me?! Was I not supposed to save them?! Was I supposed to let them die so we can win?!"
The man continued to listen.
"I hate this! I hate feeling like this! I want to forget about all this! But I can't! I just can't! It won't leave me alone!" Her words became mixed with sobbing.
"Are you angry with anyone, Miho?" the man asked in a whisper.
"No! I don't know! I...I'm just sad and angry."
"With who? Your mother? Your sister?"
"No!"
"Your classmates? The girls in the tank? Who?" The man's voice was fir, to match Miho's emotion.
"I'm angry at myself!" she cried. "Because I didn't make the right call!"
At this, she immediately sat down. She covered her face as she sobbed. The man reached for a tissue box and handed some over to her.
"Because I did something I wasn't supposed to do. But I couldn't..."
"So, here we are. Even after all the matches with the other schools, the university, beginning your own way of doing Sensha-dō, and reconnecting, to some degree, with your sister, you still harbor these feelings of what happened."
Miho didn't say anything. She wiped her tears with the tissue, looked at him, and nodded. "I guess so."
"Then is it safe to assume that you still blame yourself for what happened to you and your family?"
Miho looked at him silently. She looked at the ground again. "Yes, I still do."
With eyes of sadness, the man put his hand on her shoulder. Miho stared into his eyes.
"Recognizing your faults, admitting to them and doing something about it. That's the easy part. The hard part is letting go."
Mental illness is a serious thing. There are many who keep things to themselves, to not burden their loved ones. However, it doesn't mean it is not seen. If you need to get something off your chest, talk to someone about it. Don't keep it to yourself. Anyways, that's my point of view. Hope you liked it.
Uploader's note: This fanfic and its OCs were created by an author who goes by the username of "Anime Psychologist", and this is crossposted with his permission. Girls und Panzer belongs to Actas. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: I honestly don't know how this is going to end up. But after watching Girls und Panzer and reading all the fanfioction I decided to make something. No promises on the update schedule but if this story gets traffic then maybe I'll be inclined to write more. For now, this is a trial run.
Events are places after the Girls und Panzer movie. It's set three months after the University match and the girls are preparing for the nationals, once again.
Obviously, not all the things are sunshine and rainbows. Miho has shown signs of mental fatigue that has affected her performance on the grounds. After conferring with a doctor (with the diagnosis not being a physical problem), it's discovered it is emotional distress so she seeks help from a visiting international counselor, hired by MEXT to tend to the emotional and mental well-being of the school.
Hopefully, this clears some stuff up. I'm keeping some elements a secret so I hope you get the prologue.
FYI: I haven't written in a while so forgive me if I mess up somewhere, k? Thnxs.
It was the evening on the carrier ship of Ōarai Girl's Academy. The sea breeze mixed with the lights of an ending of a busy day. Hardly anyone, save for those who were on the Public Morals Committee patrolling the grounds, was in the main building. In the darkened halls, the sunlight clashed with the windows in the long hallway. All the rooms were vacant, save for one.
The room was a staff office. Very simple, bookshelves full of books talking about topics from special needs education to providing emotional support. A computer on a large desk, with papers scattered all over. Also, a couch with two small red pillows hid in the corner of the room beside a coat rack.
In the middle sat two individuals. One, a petite girl, with short auburn hair sporting a neat Ōarai uniform. Her brown eyes looking towards the floor, she wore a pained expression. Her hands clenched on each leg, taking hold of her skirt, as she sat and was visibly shaking. Breathing slightly heavily, her eyes welled up with tears that ran down her face.
On the other side was a man. Black short hair with brown eyes. Clean shaven, he wore what would be a light blue checkered t-shirt and jeans. His hands were folded, his eyes filled with concern and sadness.
You could cut the tension in the room. After a few moments, the girl slowly shook her head.
"I can't...," she mumbled to herself. "I'm not..."
"You can't?" asked the man. "You can't feel? Can't you be sad? Can't you be happy? You can't be upset, angry? Because if I were in your position, that is what I would be feeling. Miho, you can feel these things."
"But my friends," Miho answered, looking at him with her tear-filled eyes. "Everyone. What will they say?"
"Right now, we are focused on you. This place... is not a place of judgement. No one will condemn you or think less of you. Here, you are free to express yourself in whichever way you see fit."
Miho stared at the floor again and wiped her face with her hand. She nodded.
"It's okay to feel these emotions you have right now. If you want to scream, then scream. If you want to swear, then by all means. If you want to cry..."
Miho took a deep breath. Soon her expression changed from sadness to anger. With tears streaking down her face, she made a fist and raised her arm slightly. Slamming it on her leg, she did it again, with a grunt.
And again.
And again.
The man watched as she did this. She had never shown emotion like this before. To express oneself is to be human. To say you have no emotion would be lying to oneself. Everyone, especially the young, needs an outlet; a chance to let loose and say something.
To say, "I need help" or "I need to talk to someone." This is something Miho obviously have not done before.
"Why?" Miho asked in a whisper. "Why me?"
The man leaned slightly towards her.
"Why am I feeling this way?" She looked at the man, awaiting an answer.
"What are you feeling right Encountered Raskel the god of celebrationnow, Miho?"
"I feel upset. Upset that I lost everything. Upset how everyone judged me for what I did!" As she said this, her voice was rising and she began to breathe heavily again. "My home, my sister, who I am. Just because I wanted to save them! Why then! Why was I punished! Why was it me?!"
At this point, she was practically yelling. The man did or said nothing. He simply listened.
"Why didn't my sister defend me from mother that time?! Why does my mother treat me the way she does! Dis she hate me?! Was I not supposed to save them?! Was I supposed to let them die so we can win?!"
The man continued to listen.
"I hate this! I hate feeling like this! I want to forget about all this! But I can't! I just can't! It won't leave me alone!" Her words became mixed with sobbing.
"Are you angry with anyone, Miho?" the man asked in a whisper.
"No! I don't know! I...I'm just sad and angry."
"With who? Your mother? Your sister?"
"No!"
"Your classmates? The girls in the tank? Who?" The man's voice was fir, to match Miho's emotion.
"I'm angry at myself!" she cried. "Because I didn't make the right call!"
At this, she immediately sat down. She covered her face as she sobbed. The man reached for a tissue box and handed some over to her.
"Because I did something I wasn't supposed to do. But I couldn't..."
"So, here we are. Even after all the matches with the other schools, the university, beginning your own way of doing Sensha-dō, and reconnecting, to some degree, with your sister, you still harbor these feelings of what happened."
Miho didn't say anything. She wiped her tears with the tissue, looked at him, and nodded. "I guess so."
"Then is it safe to assume that you still blame yourself for what happened to you and your family?"
Miho looked at him silently. She looked at the ground again. "Yes, I still do."
With eyes of sadness, the man put his hand on her shoulder. Miho stared into his eyes.
"Recognizing your faults, admitting to them and doing something about it. That's the easy part. The hard part is letting go."
Mental illness is a serious thing. There are many who keep things to themselves, to not burden their loved ones. However, it doesn't mean it is not seen. If you need to get something off your chest, talk to someone about it. Don't keep it to yourself. Anyways, that's my point of view. Hope you liked it.
Begin Again I
DawnofWar32
War is coming. Prepare yourselves!
- Location
- Butuan City, The Philippines
Uploader's Note: I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: And here I wanted it to be a one-shot.
I have a bad history of updating. Even so finishing a story! So I'm hoping to keep updates on a weekly basis. Unless otherwise stated, I sure hope I'll be able to complete this story.
For all the people who favorited and reviewed, thanks so much for the support. It really means a lot to me.
A/N: And here I wanted it to be a one-shot.
I have a bad history of updating. Even so finishing a story! So I'm hoping to keep updates on a weekly basis. Unless otherwise stated, I sure hope I'll be able to complete this story.
For all the people who favorited and reviewed, thanks so much for the support. It really means a lot to me.
Three months prior
With the threat of the school's decommissioning gone, the students of Ooarai have begun to prepare for the new semester. For their part in the Shensha-do finals, the school has found a new influx of students attending that year. Freshmen and senior spirits were high as they could now take pride that the school had taken the stage in Japan's Shensha-do world.
For the Shensha-do teams, once again playing the heroines in the story, nothing was more satisfying than the fact they won't have to disperse and go to different schools. It came to a relief to all. Most of them preferred to stay out of the spotlight, taking a page in Miho's book and recognizing that it was a team effort and not one individual.
One day before the start of the school year, the members of Anglerfish Team walked the sunny path towards the school they saved. They stopped in front of the gates, reflecting upon what had transpired during the summer months.
"I wonder how this year is going to be?" asked Yukari Akiyama, the loader and second in command of the group. "I mean a lot has changed." Her excitable demeanor was mimicked by her bouncing curly brown hair as she walked.
"Not a lot has changed." Anglerfish's gunner, Hana Isuzu, replied. "Although we'll be getting a lot of new faces this year. The most this school has ever seen in a long while." A beautiful girl with a sense of both power and elegance emulated from her.
"Maybe the student council will make an announcement that we'll be a co-ed school!" Saori Takebe, the radio communicator, excitedly yelled. "I wonder how many boys will be interested in Shensha-do?" The red-haired girl interested in the latest romance would want this.
"Tell me, which fantasy land are you basing this on?" the driver, Mako Reizei, sleepily asked. "Is it the one where you actually get a boyfriend or get friendzoned?" Always gloomy, she appears sleepy but hides an intelligent and agile side.
"Girls friendzone guys, not the other way around!" Saori started to lecture Mako about relationships when Miho's hand went up.
"Maybe we should save it after we spoke with the student council," the young tank commander sheepishly said.
"I suppose. But I still wanna talk to Reizei about this. This isn't over!"
Mako gave a loud yawn and nodded. "You say that and you'll forget in 5 minutes."
"Mako!"
"Let's go," Hana said as she smiled. The group headed towards the school, and the student council room.
For the Shensha-do teams, once again playing the heroines in the story, nothing was more satisfying than the fact they won't have to disperse and go to different schools. It came to a relief to all. Most of them preferred to stay out of the spotlight, taking a page in Miho's book and recognizing that it was a team effort and not one individual.
One day before the start of the school year, the members of Anglerfish Team walked the sunny path towards the school they saved. They stopped in front of the gates, reflecting upon what had transpired during the summer months.
"I wonder how this year is going to be?" asked Yukari Akiyama, the loader and second in command of the group. "I mean a lot has changed." Her excitable demeanor was mimicked by her bouncing curly brown hair as she walked.
"Not a lot has changed." Anglerfish's gunner, Hana Isuzu, replied. "Although we'll be getting a lot of new faces this year. The most this school has ever seen in a long while." A beautiful girl with a sense of both power and elegance emulated from her.
"Maybe the student council will make an announcement that we'll be a co-ed school!" Saori Takebe, the radio communicator, excitedly yelled. "I wonder how many boys will be interested in Shensha-do?" The red-haired girl interested in the latest romance would want this.
"Tell me, which fantasy land are you basing this on?" the driver, Mako Reizei, sleepily asked. "Is it the one where you actually get a boyfriend or get friendzoned?" Always gloomy, she appears sleepy but hides an intelligent and agile side.
"Girls friendzone guys, not the other way around!" Saori started to lecture Mako about relationships when Miho's hand went up.
"Maybe we should save it after we spoke with the student council," the young tank commander sheepishly said.
"I suppose. But I still wanna talk to Reizei about this. This isn't over!"
Mako gave a loud yawn and nodded. "You say that and you'll forget in 5 minutes."
"Mako!"
"Let's go," Hana said as she smiled. The group headed towards the school, and the student council room.
"Pleased to meet you, I'm Yuzu Koyama, the VP of Ooarai Girls Academy. You must be..."
"Rirko," the young man replied. "Rirko Nagasawa. The pleasure is all mine." They both gave a slight bow to one another. Rirko, still trying to get accustomed to the culture shock of Japan, was doing his best in keeping a facade that he knew what he was doing.
But mentally, he hadn't got a clue.
Perhaps wearing a long blue shirt with plaid pants wasn't such a great idea. It was hot like a sauna. Nevertheless, they say first impressions are always improtant. He also couldn't show he was sweating up like a storm. That would have been... gross.
The two were inside one of the vacant classrooms, two rooms down from the student council's office. Seven rows of desks, neatly made, in anticipation of the start of the year. Both sat on the teacher's desk.
"I suppose it's time to get the paperwork done. Don't worry, it won't take long and you'll be on your way."
"I'm in no rush. Better to do a thorough job than a rushed one."
"Right! let's get started." The two sat down. Rirko sat squarely on the chair while Yuzu began looking through the papers.
"I'll be blunt, Mr. Nagasawa," Yuzu started as she opened a folder with documents. "It was a surprise when MEXT contacted us and said that they were supplying a counselor though I don't see the reason why now." She set a couple of pages in front of him.
"This is part of MEXT's exchange program," Rirko replied. "Our educational ministries in our respective countries are always working with other forms of governments to provide a variety of informative strategems that ultimately serve the student population. Or at least, that's what they said."
"So basically, a teacher exchange program," Yuzu said matter of factly.
"Yes, a teacher exchange program. That should simplify it."
"We requested a counselor a few years ago, but they never got back to us. So why now?" Yuzu asked in an inquisitive tone. Rirko didn't like where this was going. It sounded like he was getting interrogated.
Rirko sighed as he signed the documents. "Quite frankly, I have no idea myself."
"You'll forgive me if I don't take your words as truth. Especially what happened this summer."
The very fact that the MEXT minister had the audacity to orchestrate the decommissioning of the school was a sour topic indeed for those involved.
"Well then, I hate to disappoint but like I said before, this is simply an exchange program."
"Right..."
Rirko then stopped to look at Yuzu. She may sound rude and condescending but her body language spoke a different story. Her arms were crossed and she wore a worried expression. Her body was tensed up. This was a defensive stance assessing whether he was friend or foe.
For Yuzu to trust him, Rirko would have to tell her his side of the story. A side that was legitimate.
"Miss Koyama, to tell you the truth, I had multiple opportunities in front of me but I chose this one when it presented itself."
Yuzu was surprised. "Really? Do tell."
"Yeah. I had a good thing going back home in Canada. Completed my Bachelor's Degree university program in education, a Child and Youth Worker diploma from a few years ago, five years of experience in education and probably lined up a couple of jobs with some school boards. I was set! Then suddenly, some representative from MEXT's like: "How would you like to go to Japan for a year?" Japan, which is a dream of mine to visit for a long while, was an opportunity but I couldn't throw everything I worked for away."
"Ultimately, I decided to go. Not because of the dream, nor because of the money. But simply because I thought it would be challenging to work with students from another culture. Let me spell it out... I'm doing it for the sheer thrill of it."
As Rirko spoke with fervor, Yuzu relaxed little by little. He had basically told her he gave up on many opportunities at home just to come here.
"You may think I'm crazy but hey, you do you. If you and your council think I'm a spy for MEXT that's fine. But I'll do my job in helping young students in any way I can, and if you get in the way of that..." he leaned slightly towards her, "you're going to have a bad time."
Yuzu unfolded her arms and looked at him. It took a minute to process what was just said.
"I'm sorry if I came off as rude, Mr. Nagasawa," Yuzu said after a moment, looking down. "I didn't mean to. It's just everyone struggled so much to be here in this school. I guess we're tired... I'm tired of dealing with the politics of education."
"Your minister's an idiot."
Yuzu was shocked to hear that. Everyone in Ooarai had a low opinion of him, but a professional from the educational field, of another country, saying that? What happened if someone from MEXT heard that? She thought he would be defending him and his decisions, not condemning it.
"It doesn't make sense. I mean, why the hell would you go to all those lengths just to scrap one school? Unless it's a personal reason. We, as educated professionals, have a duty to help our students, not hold them back. I'll be happy to say that to his face if he tries something that stupid again."
Yuzu chuckled slightly. "It's one thing to say but it's another thing to do."
"Yes, yes I'm all bark and no bite." Rirko gave a smirk. Despite their rocky start, he felt he understood the situation in Ooarai more. A man's supposed vendetta would have cost many innocent students their education. And much more, their futures.
Rirko's tone became serious. "But believe me when I say this... that I'm on your side."
Yuzu collected the forms and gave a smile. What he was saying appeared sincere. "That remains to be seen for everyone else... but, not to me. Now then, allow me to show you to your office."
As Yuzu piled the papers back into the folder, the two headed out towards the bright-lit hallway.
"Rirko," the young man replied. "Rirko Nagasawa. The pleasure is all mine." They both gave a slight bow to one another. Rirko, still trying to get accustomed to the culture shock of Japan, was doing his best in keeping a facade that he knew what he was doing.
But mentally, he hadn't got a clue.
Perhaps wearing a long blue shirt with plaid pants wasn't such a great idea. It was hot like a sauna. Nevertheless, they say first impressions are always improtant. He also couldn't show he was sweating up like a storm. That would have been... gross.
The two were inside one of the vacant classrooms, two rooms down from the student council's office. Seven rows of desks, neatly made, in anticipation of the start of the year. Both sat on the teacher's desk.
"I suppose it's time to get the paperwork done. Don't worry, it won't take long and you'll be on your way."
"I'm in no rush. Better to do a thorough job than a rushed one."
"Right! let's get started." The two sat down. Rirko sat squarely on the chair while Yuzu began looking through the papers.
"I'll be blunt, Mr. Nagasawa," Yuzu started as she opened a folder with documents. "It was a surprise when MEXT contacted us and said that they were supplying a counselor though I don't see the reason why now." She set a couple of pages in front of him.
"This is part of MEXT's exchange program," Rirko replied. "Our educational ministries in our respective countries are always working with other forms of governments to provide a variety of informative strategems that ultimately serve the student population. Or at least, that's what they said."
"So basically, a teacher exchange program," Yuzu said matter of factly.
"Yes, a teacher exchange program. That should simplify it."
"We requested a counselor a few years ago, but they never got back to us. So why now?" Yuzu asked in an inquisitive tone. Rirko didn't like where this was going. It sounded like he was getting interrogated.
Rirko sighed as he signed the documents. "Quite frankly, I have no idea myself."
"You'll forgive me if I don't take your words as truth. Especially what happened this summer."
The very fact that the MEXT minister had the audacity to orchestrate the decommissioning of the school was a sour topic indeed for those involved.
"Well then, I hate to disappoint but like I said before, this is simply an exchange program."
"Right..."
Rirko then stopped to look at Yuzu. She may sound rude and condescending but her body language spoke a different story. Her arms were crossed and she wore a worried expression. Her body was tensed up. This was a defensive stance assessing whether he was friend or foe.
For Yuzu to trust him, Rirko would have to tell her his side of the story. A side that was legitimate.
"Miss Koyama, to tell you the truth, I had multiple opportunities in front of me but I chose this one when it presented itself."
Yuzu was surprised. "Really? Do tell."
"Yeah. I had a good thing going back home in Canada. Completed my Bachelor's Degree university program in education, a Child and Youth Worker diploma from a few years ago, five years of experience in education and probably lined up a couple of jobs with some school boards. I was set! Then suddenly, some representative from MEXT's like: "How would you like to go to Japan for a year?" Japan, which is a dream of mine to visit for a long while, was an opportunity but I couldn't throw everything I worked for away."
"Ultimately, I decided to go. Not because of the dream, nor because of the money. But simply because I thought it would be challenging to work with students from another culture. Let me spell it out... I'm doing it for the sheer thrill of it."
As Rirko spoke with fervor, Yuzu relaxed little by little. He had basically told her he gave up on many opportunities at home just to come here.
"You may think I'm crazy but hey, you do you. If you and your council think I'm a spy for MEXT that's fine. But I'll do my job in helping young students in any way I can, and if you get in the way of that..." he leaned slightly towards her, "you're going to have a bad time."
Yuzu unfolded her arms and looked at him. It took a minute to process what was just said.
"I'm sorry if I came off as rude, Mr. Nagasawa," Yuzu said after a moment, looking down. "I didn't mean to. It's just everyone struggled so much to be here in this school. I guess we're tired... I'm tired of dealing with the politics of education."
"Your minister's an idiot."
Yuzu was shocked to hear that. Everyone in Ooarai had a low opinion of him, but a professional from the educational field, of another country, saying that? What happened if someone from MEXT heard that? She thought he would be defending him and his decisions, not condemning it.
"It doesn't make sense. I mean, why the hell would you go to all those lengths just to scrap one school? Unless it's a personal reason. We, as educated professionals, have a duty to help our students, not hold them back. I'll be happy to say that to his face if he tries something that stupid again."
Yuzu chuckled slightly. "It's one thing to say but it's another thing to do."
"Yes, yes I'm all bark and no bite." Rirko gave a smirk. Despite their rocky start, he felt he understood the situation in Ooarai more. A man's supposed vendetta would have cost many innocent students their education. And much more, their futures.
Rirko's tone became serious. "But believe me when I say this... that I'm on your side."
Yuzu collected the forms and gave a smile. What he was saying appeared sincere. "That remains to be seen for everyone else... but, not to me. Now then, allow me to show you to your office."
As Yuzu piled the papers back into the folder, the two headed out towards the bright-lit hallway.
"Afternoon ladies!" Anzu Kadotani, president of the Student Council, called out as Anglerfish Team entered. The short, childish, red head girl was chomping down on a sweet potato chip.
"Afternoon president!" was the reply.
"Good to see you all." Momo kawashima, the PR manager said as she straightened her monocle. "We have much to discuss."
As everyone began to sit down Ami Chōno, Ooarai's Shensha-do instructor came in. Always sporting a military uniform, she gave a friendly salute. "And so the conquering heroines return!"
Miho laughed slightly. "I guess we are. Though you can call everyone in the match that."
"Don't be so modest," Anzu said, as she gulped down another chip. "Once again you saved our school. Now we can move forward and focus on the nationals once again."
The Japan Sensha-do Nationals. It was through this stage that Ooarai gained recognition from the Sensha-do community; an example that a no-name school can rise to great heights and succeed.
"I want to play a more active role in your practices and tournaments," Ami chimed in. "I'll be your liaison between you and the Federation as usual, and I'll give you advice on what you can improve on but ultimately, it'll be Miho's decision to follow through."
Momo concluded. "We're counting on you to help us succeed once again, Nishizumi. I know you won't let us down."
Once again feeling the pressure of a leader, this did not sit well for Miho. Saori put her hand on her shoulder and gave a big grin.
"Not to worry, Miporin! We'll always have your back."
Hana agreed, "We'll be with you all the way! Just let us worry about tank specifics."
Miho's face lit up. It was great to have friends. "Thanks, guys! That really means a lot!"
Mako agrees with a huge yawn.
"You're not a cat, Mako." Saori cried. Everyone had a laugh before Momo interrupted.
"Sorry to put a downer on the mood. But I think it's time to work on the logistics for this year's competition." Everyone agreed as they got to work.
"Afternoon president!" was the reply.
"Good to see you all." Momo kawashima, the PR manager said as she straightened her monocle. "We have much to discuss."
As everyone began to sit down Ami Chōno, Ooarai's Shensha-do instructor came in. Always sporting a military uniform, she gave a friendly salute. "And so the conquering heroines return!"
Miho laughed slightly. "I guess we are. Though you can call everyone in the match that."
"Don't be so modest," Anzu said, as she gulped down another chip. "Once again you saved our school. Now we can move forward and focus on the nationals once again."
The Japan Sensha-do Nationals. It was through this stage that Ooarai gained recognition from the Sensha-do community; an example that a no-name school can rise to great heights and succeed.
"I want to play a more active role in your practices and tournaments," Ami chimed in. "I'll be your liaison between you and the Federation as usual, and I'll give you advice on what you can improve on but ultimately, it'll be Miho's decision to follow through."
Momo concluded. "We're counting on you to help us succeed once again, Nishizumi. I know you won't let us down."
Once again feeling the pressure of a leader, this did not sit well for Miho. Saori put her hand on her shoulder and gave a big grin.
"Not to worry, Miporin! We'll always have your back."
Hana agreed, "We'll be with you all the way! Just let us worry about tank specifics."
Miho's face lit up. It was great to have friends. "Thanks, guys! That really means a lot!"
Mako agrees with a huge yawn.
"You're not a cat, Mako." Saori cried. Everyone had a laugh before Momo interrupted.
"Sorry to put a downer on the mood. But I think it's time to work on the logistics for this year's competition." Everyone agreed as they got to work.
"Wowwww..."
Rirko looked at the piece of paper that Yuzu gave him, then back up, then at the paper again.
His accomodations, where he would be staying for the next year, was a small Japanese duplex. A big white square with four windows. Two windows on each floor and a door in the middle. It was nestled near the school grounds, on a strip of houses, with big houses on each side.
"And here I thought Ooarai didn't have any money. Although it looks small... Should it be confy? I hope?"
Across from the duplex was a small café shop. He smelt the baked goods and the coffee grounds and heard the idle chatter amongst the patrons.
"I guess I better head inside. I'll eat later." He took the keys out of his pocket and put it in the lock. With the door open, he headed in.
The inside was spacious, if not simple. Typical Japanese amenities and furniture. Still trying to get used to the Japanese culture, Rirko saw his belongings were already inside. Taking in the atmosphere, he headed upstairs.
The upstairs were simple enough. Basic furniture and amenities, without a hint of Western culture anywhere. The one notable difference was the bed.
"Where the hell is the bed?"
In its place was a sheet with multiple layers. Rirko frowned, he'll be sleeping on the floor for the next year. Not only that, he'll need to be proficient in Japanese culture and language. He would start working tomorrow. Rirko gave a deep sigh.
"This should be fun... guess it's time for tea. Now, where's the pot?"
Rirko looked at the piece of paper that Yuzu gave him, then back up, then at the paper again.
His accomodations, where he would be staying for the next year, was a small Japanese duplex. A big white square with four windows. Two windows on each floor and a door in the middle. It was nestled near the school grounds, on a strip of houses, with big houses on each side.
"And here I thought Ooarai didn't have any money. Although it looks small... Should it be confy? I hope?"
Across from the duplex was a small café shop. He smelt the baked goods and the coffee grounds and heard the idle chatter amongst the patrons.
"I guess I better head inside. I'll eat later." He took the keys out of his pocket and put it in the lock. With the door open, he headed in.
The inside was spacious, if not simple. Typical Japanese amenities and furniture. Still trying to get used to the Japanese culture, Rirko saw his belongings were already inside. Taking in the atmosphere, he headed upstairs.
The upstairs were simple enough. Basic furniture and amenities, without a hint of Western culture anywhere. The one notable difference was the bed.
"Where the hell is the bed?"
In its place was a sheet with multiple layers. Rirko frowned, he'll be sleeping on the floor for the next year. Not only that, he'll need to be proficient in Japanese culture and language. He would start working tomorrow. Rirko gave a deep sigh.
"This should be fun... guess it's time for tea. Now, where's the pot?"
So I hope this was suitable as a second chapter. Your reviews are helpful. I'll keep this going as long as my Girls und panzer muse is with me. Constructive criticism is always appreciated. Thanks.
Begin Again II
DawnofWar32
War is coming. Prepare yourselves!
- Location
- Butuan City, The Philippines
Uploader's Note: I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: I know I said I would be updating this on a weekly basis. This is part two for the "Begin Again" chapter. Hope you enjoy it. I'm also adding titles to certain paragraphs, to be sure that we're clear on where the setting is.
Ooarai Girls Academy - Main Building
Morning dawned on a new day. The beginning of the school year. Students have received their timetables in the mail so each person knew where they were going. Actual classes today, however, were just meet and greet. Meet the teacher; greet the students and the like. All the periods were squished in for half the day. The real highlight of the day was the general assembly that happened after all the classes were done.
Ooarai Girls Academy - Gym
As the girls piled in and began to sit neatly in nice rows, Miho and her friends sat together. They were fortunate enough to be put in the same homeroom class, save for Yukari who was in the second year. This made Miho happy that she would be able to see her friends not only in homeroom but during Sensha-do practice.
Miho observed the girls chatting, sitting down, and jumping excitedly. She knew who the freshmen were as they sat looking around and who the seniors were by their excited behaviors.
Miho was amazed. "Hana, you were right. There are a lot of freshmen this year."
Hana giggled at the remark. "And it's all because of Sensha-do."
"We wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you, Miho." Mako added.
Miho was flustered. "Remember, it was a team effort. I just guided everyone."
"Yeah!" Saori said with a smile. "You guided us and gave us the winning shot."
"You praise me too much." Miho was then silent. Although Saori assumed that Miho was being honest as usual, it was, in fact, causing some thoughts to race in her mind.
'I didn't do anything much. I just did what had to be done. For everyone's sake.'
The room was soon filled with whispers of shushing. Soon, the student council, led by Anzu, appeared on the stage. "Hello, Ooarai! Welcome back!" Although small, Anzu had a huge voice. "Give me a shout if you're happy to be here!"
The entire room erupted with claps and cheers from the girls. Anglerfish joined in on the fun. Miho gave a fair effort.
"There are a lot of things that need to be discussed," Momo began. "First, a welcome to our freshmen. Everyone here will be supporting you as you get used to your surroundings."
Applause broke out.
"Secondly, I am pleased to report that through generous donations made by private sponsors, major improvements will be done to both the school's infrastructure and the school grounds. So the school will look better than the last few years."
Students were happy about these developments. "Awesome! It won't look like actual crap!"
"Shh... You can't say that in front of everyone."
"Third, we have a new school student counselor coming from overseas that will be starting tomorrow."
At the sound of this, there were a lot of whispers in the air. Anglerfish Team didn't know what to think of it.
Saori pondered, "A new faculty menber? We haven't had one of those in a while."
"Wonder who she is?" asked Hana.
"And why a counselor?" Yukari added.
Momo hushed the crowd to stop the murmurings. "He'll be introducing himself as the week progresses. So be sure to greet him with respect and mind your manners."
"HE?" The crowd erupted with a lot of chatter.
Yukari was wide-eyed. "It's a he?"
"What's the problem?" Miho asked.
Saori explained, "Well, carrier ships don't see many male staff members. This is acutally the second time a male staff came onboard."
"What happened to the first?"
"His term was up," Saori replied. "He was part of an international exchange program. It's probably the same as this guy."
"Oh..." Miho was genuinely confused. What's the problem of having a male staff member? Men could do good as any job as women can and vice versa.
"QUIET YOU GUYS!" The crowd died down as Momo yelled, albeit in a comical fashion. "Yes, the staff member is a "he" and once again I trust you girls will be on your best behavior, right!?"
Various voices of "Hai" echoed in the halls.
"Good. Now I know a lot of people are excited for Sensha-do this year..."
The crowd cheered with applause once again.
"AND THAT BEING SAID," Momo said as she raised her voice, "we will show you a short presentation about Sensha-do! This is mainly for our freshmen but I'm sure you seniors will enjoy it too."
The lights dimmed, the council went off-stage and the screen it up. On the projector, it showed footage from last year's matches. St. Glorianna, Pravda, Saunders, Kuromorimine. The ned of the presentation was met with loud cheers and applause.
"Miho Nishizumi, where are you? Can you stand up?" Momo asked the crowd.
Miho looked at her friends with pleading eyes. Obviously, she didn't want to go up there. She had been put in the spotlight. But her friends' faces were full of smiles and happiness. How could she say no to that? With a small smile, she stood and timidly waved to the crowd.
"The key person that Ooarai needed to keep our school open. On behalf of everyone here... we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you. So... thank you." The student council bowed from the stage. The crowd roared with applause. Miho was met with smiles and cheers.
She immediately sat back down. Her face went bleak and she felt weak. It looked like she was hit by a truck. For a moment, she was very quiet.
"Are you alright Miporin?" Saori asked.
"Hmm?"
Yukari chimed in. "Miss Nishizumi, you don't look so well."
"Well... I didn't expect the student council to do that... I wished..."
Inside, Miho wanted to leave. 'I wish the student council told me what they were going to do. To be in front of everyone like that.'
"Miporin?"
"It's nothing," Miho said with a smile. "Let's just enjoy the rest of the assembly.
"Oh... okay..."
The rest of the assembly was a continuation of the Sensha-do presentation. The student council introduced new incentives to joining the Sensha-do club such us 10% increase in the previous awards. Mako was excited about that. She could sleep all she wanted this year and not be overly punishe.
At the end of the presentation, Yuzu addressed the crowd.
"We hope that you all enjoyed the presentation. Tomorrow classes will begin early so make sure you get plenty of rest. The last thing we want is for you to get in trouble with the Public Morals Committee."
Everyone shuddered as Sodoko and her staff smirked. The enforcement of the school policies was on the move.
"Everyone is dismissed for today!" Anzu announced. "All team captains for the Sensha-do club, meet in the Student Council room in fifteen minutes for a briefing."
Ooarai Girls Academy - Main Building Entrance
As the crowd began to disperse, Miho and the other girls walked towards the gym entrance.
"Miporin! We'll wait for you here! We'll walk home together." The four friends smiled at her and it was so infectious that she couldn't help but smile back.
"Oh, okay!" Miho waled through the west corridors and up the flight of stairs towards to student council room. As she was reaching the room, a thought rang in her mind.
'You don't deserve this. You don't deserve to be happy.' Miho stopped in front of the door. And for a brief moment, she thought of turning around and leaving.
"Are you okay?" Miho turned around to see Caesar standing right next to her. Her trademark red sagum draped on her shoulder; she wore a worried expression on her face for her friend.
"Oh, Caesar, I didn't see you there."
"Umm... yeah. You okay?"
"Just fine. Wait, where's Erwin?"
"She said I could go in her stead. Said something about me being able to contribute more to a strategy meeting than her. You going in?"
"Yes... I'll be right in."
"Alright, if you say so. The meeting's gonna start soon." Caesar went inside with Miho waving slightly with a smile.
She sighed heavily and went inside.
And so we begin, finally. Tell me what you appreciate about the titles, were they helpful, or nah? Reviews and favorites are always appreciated. Let me know if you guys have any ideas and I'll consider them. Thanks.
A/N: I know I said I would be updating this on a weekly basis. This is part two for the "Begin Again" chapter. Hope you enjoy it. I'm also adding titles to certain paragraphs, to be sure that we're clear on where the setting is.
Ooarai Girls Academy - Main Building
Morning dawned on a new day. The beginning of the school year. Students have received their timetables in the mail so each person knew where they were going. Actual classes today, however, were just meet and greet. Meet the teacher; greet the students and the like. All the periods were squished in for half the day. The real highlight of the day was the general assembly that happened after all the classes were done.
Ooarai Girls Academy - Gym
As the girls piled in and began to sit neatly in nice rows, Miho and her friends sat together. They were fortunate enough to be put in the same homeroom class, save for Yukari who was in the second year. This made Miho happy that she would be able to see her friends not only in homeroom but during Sensha-do practice.
Miho observed the girls chatting, sitting down, and jumping excitedly. She knew who the freshmen were as they sat looking around and who the seniors were by their excited behaviors.
Miho was amazed. "Hana, you were right. There are a lot of freshmen this year."
Hana giggled at the remark. "And it's all because of Sensha-do."
"We wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you, Miho." Mako added.
Miho was flustered. "Remember, it was a team effort. I just guided everyone."
"Yeah!" Saori said with a smile. "You guided us and gave us the winning shot."
"You praise me too much." Miho was then silent. Although Saori assumed that Miho was being honest as usual, it was, in fact, causing some thoughts to race in her mind.
'I didn't do anything much. I just did what had to be done. For everyone's sake.'
The room was soon filled with whispers of shushing. Soon, the student council, led by Anzu, appeared on the stage. "Hello, Ooarai! Welcome back!" Although small, Anzu had a huge voice. "Give me a shout if you're happy to be here!"
The entire room erupted with claps and cheers from the girls. Anglerfish joined in on the fun. Miho gave a fair effort.
"There are a lot of things that need to be discussed," Momo began. "First, a welcome to our freshmen. Everyone here will be supporting you as you get used to your surroundings."
Applause broke out.
"Secondly, I am pleased to report that through generous donations made by private sponsors, major improvements will be done to both the school's infrastructure and the school grounds. So the school will look better than the last few years."
Students were happy about these developments. "Awesome! It won't look like actual crap!"
"Shh... You can't say that in front of everyone."
"Third, we have a new school student counselor coming from overseas that will be starting tomorrow."
At the sound of this, there were a lot of whispers in the air. Anglerfish Team didn't know what to think of it.
Saori pondered, "A new faculty menber? We haven't had one of those in a while."
"Wonder who she is?" asked Hana.
"And why a counselor?" Yukari added.
Momo hushed the crowd to stop the murmurings. "He'll be introducing himself as the week progresses. So be sure to greet him with respect and mind your manners."
"HE?" The crowd erupted with a lot of chatter.
Yukari was wide-eyed. "It's a he?"
"What's the problem?" Miho asked.
Saori explained, "Well, carrier ships don't see many male staff members. This is acutally the second time a male staff came onboard."
"What happened to the first?"
"His term was up," Saori replied. "He was part of an international exchange program. It's probably the same as this guy."
"Oh..." Miho was genuinely confused. What's the problem of having a male staff member? Men could do good as any job as women can and vice versa.
"QUIET YOU GUYS!" The crowd died down as Momo yelled, albeit in a comical fashion. "Yes, the staff member is a "he" and once again I trust you girls will be on your best behavior, right!?"
Various voices of "Hai" echoed in the halls.
"Good. Now I know a lot of people are excited for Sensha-do this year..."
The crowd cheered with applause once again.
"AND THAT BEING SAID," Momo said as she raised her voice, "we will show you a short presentation about Sensha-do! This is mainly for our freshmen but I'm sure you seniors will enjoy it too."
The lights dimmed, the council went off-stage and the screen it up. On the projector, it showed footage from last year's matches. St. Glorianna, Pravda, Saunders, Kuromorimine. The ned of the presentation was met with loud cheers and applause.
"Miho Nishizumi, where are you? Can you stand up?" Momo asked the crowd.
Miho looked at her friends with pleading eyes. Obviously, she didn't want to go up there. She had been put in the spotlight. But her friends' faces were full of smiles and happiness. How could she say no to that? With a small smile, she stood and timidly waved to the crowd.
"The key person that Ooarai needed to keep our school open. On behalf of everyone here... we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you. So... thank you." The student council bowed from the stage. The crowd roared with applause. Miho was met with smiles and cheers.
She immediately sat back down. Her face went bleak and she felt weak. It looked like she was hit by a truck. For a moment, she was very quiet.
"Are you alright Miporin?" Saori asked.
"Hmm?"
Yukari chimed in. "Miss Nishizumi, you don't look so well."
"Well... I didn't expect the student council to do that... I wished..."
Inside, Miho wanted to leave. 'I wish the student council told me what they were going to do. To be in front of everyone like that.'
"Miporin?"
"It's nothing," Miho said with a smile. "Let's just enjoy the rest of the assembly.
"Oh... okay..."
The rest of the assembly was a continuation of the Sensha-do presentation. The student council introduced new incentives to joining the Sensha-do club such us 10% increase in the previous awards. Mako was excited about that. She could sleep all she wanted this year and not be overly punishe.
At the end of the presentation, Yuzu addressed the crowd.
"We hope that you all enjoyed the presentation. Tomorrow classes will begin early so make sure you get plenty of rest. The last thing we want is for you to get in trouble with the Public Morals Committee."
Everyone shuddered as Sodoko and her staff smirked. The enforcement of the school policies was on the move.
"Everyone is dismissed for today!" Anzu announced. "All team captains for the Sensha-do club, meet in the Student Council room in fifteen minutes for a briefing."
Ooarai Girls Academy - Main Building Entrance
As the crowd began to disperse, Miho and the other girls walked towards the gym entrance.
"Miporin! We'll wait for you here! We'll walk home together." The four friends smiled at her and it was so infectious that she couldn't help but smile back.
"Oh, okay!" Miho waled through the west corridors and up the flight of stairs towards to student council room. As she was reaching the room, a thought rang in her mind.
'You don't deserve this. You don't deserve to be happy.' Miho stopped in front of the door. And for a brief moment, she thought of turning around and leaving.
"Are you okay?" Miho turned around to see Caesar standing right next to her. Her trademark red sagum draped on her shoulder; she wore a worried expression on her face for her friend.
"Oh, Caesar, I didn't see you there."
"Umm... yeah. You okay?"
"Just fine. Wait, where's Erwin?"
"She said I could go in her stead. Said something about me being able to contribute more to a strategy meeting than her. You going in?"
"Yes... I'll be right in."
"Alright, if you say so. The meeting's gonna start soon." Caesar went inside with Miho waving slightly with a smile.
She sighed heavily and went inside.
And so we begin, finally. Tell me what you appreciate about the titles, were they helpful, or nah? Reviews and favorites are always appreciated. Let me know if you guys have any ideas and I'll consider them. Thanks.
I Forgot to Remember to Forget
DawnofWar32
War is coming. Prepare yourselves!
- Location
- Butuan City, The Philippines
Uploader's Note: I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: The next chapter is here. I hope I didn't screw up on the formatting. Just to note, this chapter will be an introduction to flashbacks. Thanks and enjoy.
Ooarai Girls Academy - Student Council Room - Afternoon
The captains of Ooarai's Sensha-do teams gathered around, sitting on a comfy chair in the Student Council office. Midoriko "Sodoko" Sono, Mallard's team captain took pleasure in taking attendance:
Just in, the Student Council doors burst wide open, with Noriko Isobe from the Duck Team panting heavily.
"Sorry... I'm... late..." Noriko gasped. "Playing an intense... game."
Momo rose her eyebrow in an annoyed fashion. "Really, and I suppose you were there with the rest of Duck Team during the assembly, were you?"
"Umm... uh." Noriko knew she was caught.
"Remind me to think of a punishment for Duck Team. Right now, we have more pressing matters."
"Right, right," Anzu agreed. " If everyone can take a seat, we can get started."
Soon, everyone was gathered sitting in an oval shape of chairs. Momo cleared her throat. Caesar gave a slightly annoyed sigh. It was going to be one of those boasting speeches again.
"Although we hammered most of the logistics yesterday with Miho, the Student Council feels the need to share our developments with all of you here today. As such, the following will be developing in the coming weeks. With the improvements on the exterior school being made, our space for tank training has been cut almost in half. Therefore, all training exercises shall be done away from the construction zone. If we damage any of the equipment that's on site, the school will be liable."
It was Anzu's turn to speak. "We're getting new tanks!"
The entire room gasped in amazement, except for Miho, who knew this was coming.
"We were able to obtain new tanks. Another Hetzer and a Char B1. The school that sold us these tanks were getting rid of their Sensha-do club and needed funds for their own school programs."
"We were able to negotiate a good price," Yuzu helpfully added.
"Why would a school get rid of their Sensha-do club? Don't they see it's making a comeback?" Nekoya asked.
"The reasoning is simple. No one had an interest there anymore, despite the attention the sport has been receiving lately. Therefore, someone's tanks became our treasure."
"And we'll treat it as such." Satoko gave a prideful grin. "We'll be sure to honor the memory of that club by taking care of those tanks."
"Some modifications will need to be made," Momo continued. "To diversify our firepower to fit any situation."
The group agreed on this.
"Good. Glad we agreed on this. Next..."
The door opened and Ami entered the room. "Afternoon ladies!"
"Afternoon Miss Chono!"
Momo looked at her list. "It's a good thing you're here instructor. I was just about to debrief them on one of the tournament rules."
Ami looked at Momo. "Oh... that."
As Ami took to the center of the room, Miho had a bad feeling about what she was going to say. Any tournament rule, especially added ones, means more of a challenge for the team. Ami took a piece of paper out of her pocket and cleared her throat a couple of times.
"The Sensha-do Federation conveys greetings and congratulations for a successful tournament win. Considering the future, the Federation has decided to add some rules for the safety of the participants. Always striving for safety, all teams are required to practice safety drills, in case of emergencies. Dangers such as being knocked out by a shell or being in the way of a moving tank. Mind you, these risks are minimal nowadays but the Federation is insisting on the practices. Any school that does not have safety drills in place will be disqualified from the competition. These drills must also be in a physical format and delivered to the Federation's head office before the drawing ceremony."
"I'll take care of that," Yuzu volunteered.
Common sense. Although the dangers of Sensha-do exist, it had always put the safety of the participants first and every year they add another safety rule.
"That was the easy one... now, for the hard one." Ami took a deep breath. " I don't know if I'm going to get this right the first time but I'll try my best to explain it to you. Over the years, the Federation has been under increased pressure from child advocate groups, citing the dangers of the practices of Sensha-do. It has been particularly nasty this year. The groups cited the finals of this year's nationals and the University match's battleground devastation as examples how dangers cannot only be physical... but psychological."
"Therefore, MEXT, the Federation, and the advocacy groups have reached an agreement. Any team member that has been emotionally compromised will NOT be allowed to compete. A counselor has been dispatched to each of the schools practicing Sensha-do, courtesy of MEXT. If that counselor lists that member as "emotionally compromised" and is found still participating in a tournament match, then the entire school is disqualified immediately."
The girls were confused with the term "emotionally compromised." What does that even mean? What does that mean for them?
"Um, ma'am?" Sodoko asked. "I think I'm saying this on behalf of everyone but what the heck is being 'emotionally compromised'?"
"To my understanding, it is when a person is emotionally or psychologically distressed. Anxiety attacks, depression, shell-shock. Even though Sensha-do is a sport, it doesn't change the fact that these tanks were used as tools of war. Firing on one another, making risky maneuvers with tanks, and the espionage some schools are willing to do. The very fact we were able to make Sensha-do a viable sport is nothing short of a miracle."
Yuzu muttered under her breath. "That liar..."
"Is that why the new counselor is here?" Caesar asked. "To make sure sure that we're not, 'emotionally compromised'?"
"For him, no. His reason was that of an international exchange program that was being conducted before the new rules came into effect. Although, I suspect that he'll be given the responsibility of this for convenience sake."
"So, he was telling the truth." Yuzu slightly smiled.
Now Miho was more nervous than ever. Would this interfere with her commanding the teams? The mere fact that a school could be dropped out of the tournament if a person was emotionally distressed. What happens if it was a key person, like herself?
"But I'm sure we don't have a problem like that here," Anzu remarked reassuringly. "After all, everyone is such good friends here, right?"
"Right!"
"R-right..." Miho answered somewhat enthusiastically.
"At any rate, that's how it is." Ami closed her eyes. "MEXT and the Federation are becoming more technical this year. These measures are to make sure that they are not liable for anything."
"Which would be a good business strategy," Nekoya said as she shifted her chair a little. "But we're not exactly businessmen here."
"And we won't be." Satoko quipped. "Our hearts belong to our tanks and Sensha-do."
Momo adjusted her monocle slightly. "Yes, yes, you've made that abundantly clear already." She sounded annoyed at Satoko's enthusiasm. "Now then, let's get to the specifics of practices. Miho, what would you like to work on for the next few weeks?"
Miho, who was quiet for most of the meeting, stood up and faced everyone. In her eyes, a spark of passion was seen.
"There are a couple of things I'd like to see this year. It's great that you all have trust in me but we need to think future scenarios. In case I get knocked out during a match, I need you all to make your own personal calls during situations."
"Personal calls?" Azusa asked. "Like to make a decision at a moment's notice?"
"Exactly. Each team has a tank commander but it would be nice to also have teams paired up. That way, you'll be able to know what the other will be doing."
"Will this 'getting to know' thing happen on or off the field?" Caesar asked with a puzzling look.
"Both. Get to know each team. Even though we belong to the Sensha-do club, it doesn't mean our relationship should stop there. That way, on the field, we can trust one another completely."
Satoko was confused. "But don't we do that already?"
"There are certain things that we trust each other with. We can rely on someone to have our backs but when someone else is giving a command that sounds far-fetched or even dangerous, will we question them and not do it?"
The room was silent.
"Know thy neighbor, as yourself," Caesar remarked.
"Our team just got together last year. This year, we're going to make it grow. With two more tanks coming in and potential new recruits, we'll need to really come together if we're going to make it to the nationals again."
The thought of making to the nationals again filled everyone with pride.
"Then all teams will take the extra initiative to get to know one another. Tank commanders are to make plans with each other off the field to bond with one another."
"I like it," Yuzu declared. "We're a team and we need to grow in trust, not only in physical strength."
Everyone agreed. To know your teammates inside and out, this was an effective way to come up with strategies that would be based on one another's trust. To take a leap of faith and to trust that they won't fail.
"So, it's decided," Anzu stated in finality. "Each team will get together for bonding time. Nishizumi, is there anything else you want to add?"
Miho though for a moment then reflected her meeting with Maho, her sister. What did she say when she left after the final match?
"We're out there to have fun! Even though it's a competition, let's remember to enjoy ourselves. Let's make the most out of it!"
Miho said this with much passion; it was hard not to pay attention to that. Everyone looked at her intently. She immediately realized what she did and went red-faced.
Once again, everyone was silent. After a while, Ami broke the silence.
"Alright, that came out of left field."
"But it's true," Yuzu remarked. "Let's all remember to have a good time!"
"YEAH!"
A/N: The next chapter is here. I hope I didn't screw up on the formatting. Just to note, this chapter will be an introduction to flashbacks. Thanks and enjoy.
Ooarai Girls Academy - Student Council Room - Afternoon
The captains of Ooarai's Sensha-do teams gathered around, sitting on a comfy chair in the Student Council office. Midoriko "Sodoko" Sono, Mallard's team captain took pleasure in taking attendance:
- Anglerfish Team - Miho Nishizumi - Present
- Turtle Team - Anzu Kadotani - Present
- Hippo Team - Takako Suzuki (Filling in for Erwin) - Present
- Rabbit Team - Azusa Sawa - Present
- Mallard Team - Midoriko Sono - Present (As always)
- Anteater Team - Nekoya? - Present
- Leopon Team - Satoko Nakajima - Present
Just in, the Student Council doors burst wide open, with Noriko Isobe from the Duck Team panting heavily.
"Sorry... I'm... late..." Noriko gasped. "Playing an intense... game."
Momo rose her eyebrow in an annoyed fashion. "Really, and I suppose you were there with the rest of Duck Team during the assembly, were you?"
"Umm... uh." Noriko knew she was caught.
"Remind me to think of a punishment for Duck Team. Right now, we have more pressing matters."
"Right, right," Anzu agreed. " If everyone can take a seat, we can get started."
Soon, everyone was gathered sitting in an oval shape of chairs. Momo cleared her throat. Caesar gave a slightly annoyed sigh. It was going to be one of those boasting speeches again.
"Although we hammered most of the logistics yesterday with Miho, the Student Council feels the need to share our developments with all of you here today. As such, the following will be developing in the coming weeks. With the improvements on the exterior school being made, our space for tank training has been cut almost in half. Therefore, all training exercises shall be done away from the construction zone. If we damage any of the equipment that's on site, the school will be liable."
It was Anzu's turn to speak. "We're getting new tanks!"
The entire room gasped in amazement, except for Miho, who knew this was coming.
"We were able to obtain new tanks. Another Hetzer and a Char B1. The school that sold us these tanks were getting rid of their Sensha-do club and needed funds for their own school programs."
"We were able to negotiate a good price," Yuzu helpfully added.
"Why would a school get rid of their Sensha-do club? Don't they see it's making a comeback?" Nekoya asked.
"The reasoning is simple. No one had an interest there anymore, despite the attention the sport has been receiving lately. Therefore, someone's tanks became our treasure."
"And we'll treat it as such." Satoko gave a prideful grin. "We'll be sure to honor the memory of that club by taking care of those tanks."
"Some modifications will need to be made," Momo continued. "To diversify our firepower to fit any situation."
The group agreed on this.
"Good. Glad we agreed on this. Next..."
The door opened and Ami entered the room. "Afternoon ladies!"
"Afternoon Miss Chono!"
Momo looked at her list. "It's a good thing you're here instructor. I was just about to debrief them on one of the tournament rules."
Ami looked at Momo. "Oh... that."
As Ami took to the center of the room, Miho had a bad feeling about what she was going to say. Any tournament rule, especially added ones, means more of a challenge for the team. Ami took a piece of paper out of her pocket and cleared her throat a couple of times.
"The Sensha-do Federation conveys greetings and congratulations for a successful tournament win. Considering the future, the Federation has decided to add some rules for the safety of the participants. Always striving for safety, all teams are required to practice safety drills, in case of emergencies. Dangers such as being knocked out by a shell or being in the way of a moving tank. Mind you, these risks are minimal nowadays but the Federation is insisting on the practices. Any school that does not have safety drills in place will be disqualified from the competition. These drills must also be in a physical format and delivered to the Federation's head office before the drawing ceremony."
"I'll take care of that," Yuzu volunteered.
Common sense. Although the dangers of Sensha-do exist, it had always put the safety of the participants first and every year they add another safety rule.
"That was the easy one... now, for the hard one." Ami took a deep breath. " I don't know if I'm going to get this right the first time but I'll try my best to explain it to you. Over the years, the Federation has been under increased pressure from child advocate groups, citing the dangers of the practices of Sensha-do. It has been particularly nasty this year. The groups cited the finals of this year's nationals and the University match's battleground devastation as examples how dangers cannot only be physical... but psychological."
"Therefore, MEXT, the Federation, and the advocacy groups have reached an agreement. Any team member that has been emotionally compromised will NOT be allowed to compete. A counselor has been dispatched to each of the schools practicing Sensha-do, courtesy of MEXT. If that counselor lists that member as "emotionally compromised" and is found still participating in a tournament match, then the entire school is disqualified immediately."
The girls were confused with the term "emotionally compromised." What does that even mean? What does that mean for them?
"Um, ma'am?" Sodoko asked. "I think I'm saying this on behalf of everyone but what the heck is being 'emotionally compromised'?"
"To my understanding, it is when a person is emotionally or psychologically distressed. Anxiety attacks, depression, shell-shock. Even though Sensha-do is a sport, it doesn't change the fact that these tanks were used as tools of war. Firing on one another, making risky maneuvers with tanks, and the espionage some schools are willing to do. The very fact we were able to make Sensha-do a viable sport is nothing short of a miracle."
Yuzu muttered under her breath. "That liar..."
"Is that why the new counselor is here?" Caesar asked. "To make sure sure that we're not, 'emotionally compromised'?"
"For him, no. His reason was that of an international exchange program that was being conducted before the new rules came into effect. Although, I suspect that he'll be given the responsibility of this for convenience sake."
"So, he was telling the truth." Yuzu slightly smiled.
Now Miho was more nervous than ever. Would this interfere with her commanding the teams? The mere fact that a school could be dropped out of the tournament if a person was emotionally distressed. What happens if it was a key person, like herself?
"But I'm sure we don't have a problem like that here," Anzu remarked reassuringly. "After all, everyone is such good friends here, right?"
"Right!"
"R-right..." Miho answered somewhat enthusiastically.
"At any rate, that's how it is." Ami closed her eyes. "MEXT and the Federation are becoming more technical this year. These measures are to make sure that they are not liable for anything."
"Which would be a good business strategy," Nekoya said as she shifted her chair a little. "But we're not exactly businessmen here."
"And we won't be." Satoko quipped. "Our hearts belong to our tanks and Sensha-do."
Momo adjusted her monocle slightly. "Yes, yes, you've made that abundantly clear already." She sounded annoyed at Satoko's enthusiasm. "Now then, let's get to the specifics of practices. Miho, what would you like to work on for the next few weeks?"
Miho, who was quiet for most of the meeting, stood up and faced everyone. In her eyes, a spark of passion was seen.
"There are a couple of things I'd like to see this year. It's great that you all have trust in me but we need to think future scenarios. In case I get knocked out during a match, I need you all to make your own personal calls during situations."
"Personal calls?" Azusa asked. "Like to make a decision at a moment's notice?"
"Exactly. Each team has a tank commander but it would be nice to also have teams paired up. That way, you'll be able to know what the other will be doing."
"Will this 'getting to know' thing happen on or off the field?" Caesar asked with a puzzling look.
"Both. Get to know each team. Even though we belong to the Sensha-do club, it doesn't mean our relationship should stop there. That way, on the field, we can trust one another completely."
Satoko was confused. "But don't we do that already?"
"There are certain things that we trust each other with. We can rely on someone to have our backs but when someone else is giving a command that sounds far-fetched or even dangerous, will we question them and not do it?"
The room was silent.
"Know thy neighbor, as yourself," Caesar remarked.
"Our team just got together last year. This year, we're going to make it grow. With two more tanks coming in and potential new recruits, we'll need to really come together if we're going to make it to the nationals again."
The thought of making to the nationals again filled everyone with pride.
"Then all teams will take the extra initiative to get to know one another. Tank commanders are to make plans with each other off the field to bond with one another."
"I like it," Yuzu declared. "We're a team and we need to grow in trust, not only in physical strength."
Everyone agreed. To know your teammates inside and out, this was an effective way to come up with strategies that would be based on one another's trust. To take a leap of faith and to trust that they won't fail.
"So, it's decided," Anzu stated in finality. "Each team will get together for bonding time. Nishizumi, is there anything else you want to add?"
Miho though for a moment then reflected her meeting with Maho, her sister. What did she say when she left after the final match?
"Miho, you've finally found your own way of doing Sensha-do."
"We're out there to have fun! Even though it's a competition, let's remember to enjoy ourselves. Let's make the most out of it!"
Miho said this with much passion; it was hard not to pay attention to that. Everyone looked at her intently. She immediately realized what she did and went red-faced.
Once again, everyone was silent. After a while, Ami broke the silence.
"Alright, that came out of left field."
"But it's true," Yuzu remarked. "Let's all remember to have a good time!"
"YEAH!"
Ooarai Carrier Ship - In Front of Miho's Apartment - Evening
It was evening on the Ooarai Carrier Ship. Her friends waited for Miho to return and when she did, they walked together on the road home. During this time, it was small talk. Saori berating Mako about her laziness, Hana talking to Yukari about modifying the Panzer IV's main gun and explaining specifics. Miho, as usual, watches them with a smile. When the time came for the five friends to depart, Miho waved goodbye in front of her apartment complex.
Suddenly, Miho overheard a conversation between two young girls as they were walking by her.
"Can you get me an ice cream cone?" on of the girls asked.
"Yeah, yeah. I did promise you that didn't I?" The other girl had a wide grin on her face.
"Yes, you did promise! I was great, wasn't I?"
"You were? Was that you or another girl that looked like you? I could have sworn that it was another girl."
"Sister, you're mean!"
"I kid, I kid, relax."
"When it comes to ice cream, I am relaxed!"
Miho heard this exchange and thought them as an older/younger sister pair. This made her think about her own relationship with Maho years ago.
It was evening on the Ooarai Carrier Ship. Her friends waited for Miho to return and when she did, they walked together on the road home. During this time, it was small talk. Saori berating Mako about her laziness, Hana talking to Yukari about modifying the Panzer IV's main gun and explaining specifics. Miho, as usual, watches them with a smile. When the time came for the five friends to depart, Miho waved goodbye in front of her apartment complex.
Suddenly, Miho overheard a conversation between two young girls as they were walking by her.
"Can you get me an ice cream cone?" on of the girls asked.
"Yeah, yeah. I did promise you that didn't I?" The other girl had a wide grin on her face.
"Yes, you did promise! I was great, wasn't I?"
"You were? Was that you or another girl that looked like you? I could have sworn that it was another girl."
"Sister, you're mean!"
"I kid, I kid, relax."
"When it comes to ice cream, I am relaxed!"
Miho heard this exchange and thought them as an older/younger sister pair. This made her think about her own relationship with Maho years ago.
"You'll be starting Sensha-do soon, right Maho?"
"Yes, I will! It'll be great! I get to learn a lot more about tanks!"
"Will I be able to learn as much as you?"
"When you're older," Maho said with a smile.
Miho huffed. "But I wanna learn now!"
Maho held her hand way up in the air. "You must be this tall to learn!"
Miho tried to reach her hand while Maho laughed at her attempts. Both fell over when Miho overreached for Maho's arm. On the floor, they stared for a moment. Soon both were laughing about the whole thing.
"Yes, I will! It'll be great! I get to learn a lot more about tanks!"
"Will I be able to learn as much as you?"
"When you're older," Maho said with a smile.
Miho huffed. "But I wanna learn now!"
Maho held her hand way up in the air. "You must be this tall to learn!"
Miho tried to reach her hand while Maho laughed at her attempts. Both fell over when Miho overreached for Maho's arm. On the floor, they stared for a moment. Soon both were laughing about the whole thing.
As she remembered this, she felt a sharp pain in her chest. She suddenly felt the need to cry. She didn't know why. Why? This was a happy memory. Pushing the feeling of sadness away, she climber the stairs to her apartment.
That night, Miho couldn't sleep well. The memory lingered in her head. The fact that she was miles away from her sister made her dejected. Although they reconciled at the end of the nationals, it was a far cry from their relationship before. Taking a sip of water and heading back to bed, she quietly wept herself to sleep.
That night, Miho couldn't sleep well. The memory lingered in her head. The fact that she was miles away from her sister made her dejected. Although they reconciled at the end of the nationals, it was a far cry from their relationship before. Taking a sip of water and heading back to bed, she quietly wept herself to sleep.
Thank you for your support. It is greatly appreciated. Always like and review, it does help me a ton.
I Could Make You Care
DawnofWar32
War is coming. Prepare yourselves!
- Location
- Butuan City, The Philippines
Uploader's Note: So... first of all, I would like to deeply apologize for not updating this thread. This has been left for more than four years due to IRL responsibilities and my lack of stable internet connection from where I'm at. Rest assured that I will find the time to regularly post here.
For the usual disclaimer, I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: The updates will now be happening on an irregular basis. That means, it can happen at anytime. Idk, I just feel like it. I've been working on this story everyday now. Maybe because I just wanted it done or maybe I'm just excited to release a new chapter. So, that's how it is.
For those who review and favorite, thank you so much for your support. I hope you're enjoying yourselves.
Oorai Girl's Academy – Main Building – Faulty Office
It was a long day for Rirko. First, he swore that he was on the ship of the Valkyries when he got to the staff meeting that afternoon; everyone in that room was a woman. Whispers filled the room. Every other word Rirko heard was "handsome" and "guy" and "wow."
"Settle down now," Headmistress Chimiya Radou announced as everyone began to take their seats. "We have much to cover in the short amount of time."
As everyone starts to sit down, Rirko headed for a chair. "Not you, Mr. Nagasawa, you come up to the front."
Then Rirko remembered that in Japanese custom, the new person on the block stands right beside his boss. The boss does an introduction; the new person introduces himself and bows. In the western world, you could do introductions from your seat and not make a total spectacle of yourself.
"Welcome everyone to the start of the academic year. First, let us remove the elephant in the room." All eyes stared at Rirko. This made him nervous for obvious reasons.
"This is Rirko Nagasawa, he's part of MEXT teacher exchange program in place of Ms. Nowa. He'll be Oorai's new student counselor."
"It's a pleasure to meet you all," Rirko said with a slight bow. "I hope we can work well together."
The whispers started up again.
"Mr. Nagasawa will be staying here for the remainder of the school year. I expect everyone here to show him the proper respect and courtesy that his station deserves. Listening to the problems of youth today is no easy feat."
The murmurs of agreement rang aloud.
Headmistress Radou motioned Rirko to take a seat. "You can learn about Mr. Nagasawa in the coming days. Please make an effort to make him feel welcomed. Now then…"
As the headmistress continued the meeting, Rirko was still in somewhat of a shock. All of the staff here were women. Not a single man in sight!
"I thought there would be a least one guy here but no, it's really is a ship of the Valkyries."
The meeting took what seemed to be forty minutes. They mostly spoke about important dates, academic revamps of the curriculum, class sizes and committee volunteers for school events. At the end of all this, the headmistress spoke again.
"As you well know, our Sensha-do program had restarted last year and what a show it was! No one was expecting Oorai to be part of the world stage! We are extremely proud of our young ladies for this feat and hope we can repeat this year."
The murmurs of enthusiasm started at the word "Sensha-do."
Rirko didn't know much of the sport but rather it had become very popular a few months ago back in Canada. Back in the day, Sensha-do, or Tankery in the western world, was noted to be an out-dated practice of combat sport. With Oorai winning the championship, the world blew up to tank frenzy. Shops selling tank merchandise, other school challenging other schools for a tankery competition and such.
For Rirko, it didn't matter. The reason why he didn't get into it was that he believed that it was too "mainstream." He wasn't an avid sportsperson, to begin with. His passion was in academics, not tanks.
"This being said, I feel the need to share the new rules that the Sensha-do Federation put in place in order to be on the same page with our girls. Two rules were put forth: having emergency practice drills in place for all Sensha-Do teams. That's a given. However,…"
As she said this, the headmistress pulled out a piece of paper from one of the folders she had on the table.
"This is an order from both the MEXT and the Federation about suspending any person participating in Sensha-Do that is "emotionally compromised."
"Ma'am," asked a brunette teacher, "when you say, emotionally compromised, do you mean a person that cannot do everyday activities due to some sort of mental trauma?"
"That's exactly what she's saying," Rirko replied. However, he didn't mean to say that but he said it automatically. Everyone looked towards him.
"Oh my god, did I just say that. F- "
They looked at him expecting an answer. Might as well give them one.
"Anxiety, depression, withdrawal, to the most extreme: suicidal ideation. Pretty much it's anything that is out of the ordinary with that person's normal behavior."
Headmistress Radou gave a quick smile before turning back to her stern look. "Exactly right, Mr. Nagasawa. And that is why the Federation has appointed YOU as our school's Sensha-Do wellness specialist."
"HUH?"
Once again, everyone looked at Rirko again.
The headmistress was wide-eyed. "I beg your pardon? Huh?"
"Um…I mean, excuse me. That took me by surprise. Apologies, headmistress, some western habits leaked off again." Rirko was slightly embarrassed but the reaction was warranted. When was he consulted about this added duty, to a sport he didn't really care much about?
The headmistress cleared her throat. "It's quite alright, Mr. Nagasawa but please try to keep your reactions subtler next time. You won't be teaching our girls tactics or maneuvers. That job belongs to Miss Chono. To clarify, and this goes for everyone here, if any member of the Sensha-Do team or any other one of our girls for that matter, are exhibiting behaviors that warrant a concern, please refer them to Mr. Nagasawa here. I believe his knowledge on mental health will be most beneficial."
In this, Rirko had to agree. "Yes, headmistress." In the entire room, he was the only one that had proficient knowledge of the mind than anyone else. He then thought, "wait, what happened to the last school counselor? Didn't they have a position like this here before?"
"Now I believe that Mr. Nagasawa wishes to present something to everyone?"
"Oh yes," Rirko stood up. Shifting a pile of big envelopes, he gave each homeroom teacher one.
"To get a feel of the student demographics and for you to have a chance to iterate concerns about certain individuals privately, I'm asking for your assistance in having the students fill up a personality/emotional wellness quiz. The quiz itself is twenty questions and it will tell me how each student is emotionally. For most, it won't take longer than thirty minutes, even shorter."
"Will the results be shared?" asked a teacher.
"Absolutely not. These answers are strictly confidential and for information gathering purposes only. It is only if a student shows signs of emotional distress that the matter is discussed between myself and the homeroom teacher. After the tallying of these quizzes, they will be put in the student's file as reference."
Each teacher looked with either distrust, interest or a little of both.
"Yes, this is a bit foreign. However, people like to keep their personal problems, personal. They are not forthcoming if you confront them in front of everyone else. Therefore, if you see any person in distress, talk privately about it. Be supportive and if necessary get them help."
"You should do a workshop outlining the importance of mental health," Headmistress Radou noted. "It will surely give our faculty the tools they need to identify concerning behavior."
Rirko looked at the headmistress. "This isn't an option, is it?"
The headmistress smiled, "I'm so glad you were able to catch on so quickly. Welcome to Japan." At this everyone laughed, at Rirko's expense.
As soon as the meeting was over, Rirko was alone with Headmistress Radou.
"Well, Mr. Nagasawa. How did you like our staff meeting?"
"To be honest, it was much like the ones back home."
"Of course, we share a lot of commonalities with our western counterparts. Our love for Sensha-do, for example. That brings me to this." The headmistress pulled out a red folder that was slightly thick. It was rubber banded together.
"These are our profiles for each of the girls on the Sensha-Do teams that the homeroom teachers completed, courtesy of the last counselor that was here. Do look over them. If there are any concerns, contact me immediately."
"Yes, headmistress." Great. I love doing more work.
"Always appreciated when working with a 'yes' man."
Rirko gave a frown, "not to worry, headmistress. If my job demands it, we will be on different professional ends."
"Let's hope that day isn't for a while."
Oorai School Carrier - Outside of Rirko's House - Evening
It was evening now. The café that was close to Rirko's house was conveniently located as he could buy dinner once and a while. While waiting for his bento box dinner, he decided to look through the profiles of the Sensha-do teams. Mallard, Duck, Leopon, Hippo, Rabbit, and Anglerfish."
"What kind of names are these teams? Kids these days!"
Rirko read most the profiles. Or rather, skimmed. He got to Anglerfish's team when he got to Miho's profile. One part of the profile read Traits and Attributes:
Constant state of fear? If this student was in a constant state of fear, how is she able to keep up with school? Something like that would have kept someone out from school.
Rirko's eyes bulged when he read a few lines down:
"How the hell is she the team commander? If she's in a constant state of fear, wouldn't this stress make it even worse?"
Taking out a book titled "Feelings and Associations. Flipping through the pages, he found a color wheel, with a primary feeling in the middle, with words that associate themselves closer with that feeling. Under "fearful":
"Shit."
Rirko's food came. As he thanked the waiter, he drew a huge star beside her name.
For the usual disclaimer, I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: The updates will now be happening on an irregular basis. That means, it can happen at anytime. Idk, I just feel like it. I've been working on this story everyday now. Maybe because I just wanted it done or maybe I'm just excited to release a new chapter. So, that's how it is.
For those who review and favorite, thank you so much for your support. I hope you're enjoying yourselves.
Oorai Girl's Academy – Main Building – Faulty Office
It was a long day for Rirko. First, he swore that he was on the ship of the Valkyries when he got to the staff meeting that afternoon; everyone in that room was a woman. Whispers filled the room. Every other word Rirko heard was "handsome" and "guy" and "wow."
"Settle down now," Headmistress Chimiya Radou announced as everyone began to take their seats. "We have much to cover in the short amount of time."
As everyone starts to sit down, Rirko headed for a chair. "Not you, Mr. Nagasawa, you come up to the front."
Then Rirko remembered that in Japanese custom, the new person on the block stands right beside his boss. The boss does an introduction; the new person introduces himself and bows. In the western world, you could do introductions from your seat and not make a total spectacle of yourself.
"Welcome everyone to the start of the academic year. First, let us remove the elephant in the room." All eyes stared at Rirko. This made him nervous for obvious reasons.
"This is Rirko Nagasawa, he's part of MEXT teacher exchange program in place of Ms. Nowa. He'll be Oorai's new student counselor."
"It's a pleasure to meet you all," Rirko said with a slight bow. "I hope we can work well together."
The whispers started up again.
"Mr. Nagasawa will be staying here for the remainder of the school year. I expect everyone here to show him the proper respect and courtesy that his station deserves. Listening to the problems of youth today is no easy feat."
The murmurs of agreement rang aloud.
Headmistress Radou motioned Rirko to take a seat. "You can learn about Mr. Nagasawa in the coming days. Please make an effort to make him feel welcomed. Now then…"
As the headmistress continued the meeting, Rirko was still in somewhat of a shock. All of the staff here were women. Not a single man in sight!
"I thought there would be a least one guy here but no, it's really is a ship of the Valkyries."
The meeting took what seemed to be forty minutes. They mostly spoke about important dates, academic revamps of the curriculum, class sizes and committee volunteers for school events. At the end of all this, the headmistress spoke again.
"As you well know, our Sensha-do program had restarted last year and what a show it was! No one was expecting Oorai to be part of the world stage! We are extremely proud of our young ladies for this feat and hope we can repeat this year."
The murmurs of enthusiasm started at the word "Sensha-do."
Rirko didn't know much of the sport but rather it had become very popular a few months ago back in Canada. Back in the day, Sensha-do, or Tankery in the western world, was noted to be an out-dated practice of combat sport. With Oorai winning the championship, the world blew up to tank frenzy. Shops selling tank merchandise, other school challenging other schools for a tankery competition and such.
For Rirko, it didn't matter. The reason why he didn't get into it was that he believed that it was too "mainstream." He wasn't an avid sportsperson, to begin with. His passion was in academics, not tanks.
"This being said, I feel the need to share the new rules that the Sensha-do Federation put in place in order to be on the same page with our girls. Two rules were put forth: having emergency practice drills in place for all Sensha-Do teams. That's a given. However,…"
As she said this, the headmistress pulled out a piece of paper from one of the folders she had on the table.
"This is an order from both the MEXT and the Federation about suspending any person participating in Sensha-Do that is "emotionally compromised."
"Ma'am," asked a brunette teacher, "when you say, emotionally compromised, do you mean a person that cannot do everyday activities due to some sort of mental trauma?"
"That's exactly what she's saying," Rirko replied. However, he didn't mean to say that but he said it automatically. Everyone looked towards him.
"Oh my god, did I just say that. F- "
They looked at him expecting an answer. Might as well give them one.
"Anxiety, depression, withdrawal, to the most extreme: suicidal ideation. Pretty much it's anything that is out of the ordinary with that person's normal behavior."
Headmistress Radou gave a quick smile before turning back to her stern look. "Exactly right, Mr. Nagasawa. And that is why the Federation has appointed YOU as our school's Sensha-Do wellness specialist."
"HUH?"
Once again, everyone looked at Rirko again.
The headmistress was wide-eyed. "I beg your pardon? Huh?"
"Um…I mean, excuse me. That took me by surprise. Apologies, headmistress, some western habits leaked off again." Rirko was slightly embarrassed but the reaction was warranted. When was he consulted about this added duty, to a sport he didn't really care much about?
The headmistress cleared her throat. "It's quite alright, Mr. Nagasawa but please try to keep your reactions subtler next time. You won't be teaching our girls tactics or maneuvers. That job belongs to Miss Chono. To clarify, and this goes for everyone here, if any member of the Sensha-Do team or any other one of our girls for that matter, are exhibiting behaviors that warrant a concern, please refer them to Mr. Nagasawa here. I believe his knowledge on mental health will be most beneficial."
In this, Rirko had to agree. "Yes, headmistress." In the entire room, he was the only one that had proficient knowledge of the mind than anyone else. He then thought, "wait, what happened to the last school counselor? Didn't they have a position like this here before?"
"Now I believe that Mr. Nagasawa wishes to present something to everyone?"
"Oh yes," Rirko stood up. Shifting a pile of big envelopes, he gave each homeroom teacher one.
"To get a feel of the student demographics and for you to have a chance to iterate concerns about certain individuals privately, I'm asking for your assistance in having the students fill up a personality/emotional wellness quiz. The quiz itself is twenty questions and it will tell me how each student is emotionally. For most, it won't take longer than thirty minutes, even shorter."
"Will the results be shared?" asked a teacher.
"Absolutely not. These answers are strictly confidential and for information gathering purposes only. It is only if a student shows signs of emotional distress that the matter is discussed between myself and the homeroom teacher. After the tallying of these quizzes, they will be put in the student's file as reference."
Each teacher looked with either distrust, interest or a little of both.
"Yes, this is a bit foreign. However, people like to keep their personal problems, personal. They are not forthcoming if you confront them in front of everyone else. Therefore, if you see any person in distress, talk privately about it. Be supportive and if necessary get them help."
"You should do a workshop outlining the importance of mental health," Headmistress Radou noted. "It will surely give our faculty the tools they need to identify concerning behavior."
Rirko looked at the headmistress. "This isn't an option, is it?"
The headmistress smiled, "I'm so glad you were able to catch on so quickly. Welcome to Japan." At this everyone laughed, at Rirko's expense.
As soon as the meeting was over, Rirko was alone with Headmistress Radou.
"Well, Mr. Nagasawa. How did you like our staff meeting?"
"To be honest, it was much like the ones back home."
"Of course, we share a lot of commonalities with our western counterparts. Our love for Sensha-do, for example. That brings me to this." The headmistress pulled out a red folder that was slightly thick. It was rubber banded together.
"These are our profiles for each of the girls on the Sensha-Do teams that the homeroom teachers completed, courtesy of the last counselor that was here. Do look over them. If there are any concerns, contact me immediately."
"Yes, headmistress." Great. I love doing more work.
"Always appreciated when working with a 'yes' man."
Rirko gave a frown, "not to worry, headmistress. If my job demands it, we will be on different professional ends."
"Let's hope that day isn't for a while."
Oorai School Carrier - Outside of Rirko's House - Evening
It was evening now. The café that was close to Rirko's house was conveniently located as he could buy dinner once and a while. While waiting for his bento box dinner, he decided to look through the profiles of the Sensha-do teams. Mallard, Duck, Leopon, Hippo, Rabbit, and Anglerfish."
"What kind of names are these teams? Kids these days!"
Rirko read most the profiles. Or rather, skimmed. He got to Anglerfish's team when he got to Miho's profile. One part of the profile read Traits and Attributes:
The first day of school – Appeared "out of place." Always alone. Did not initiate contact with other classmates. Clumsy.
During the year, Miho has become more vocal while keeping the same shy tone.
Confident in Sensha-Do. Other areas lacking.
Appears to be in a constant state of fear.
During the year, Miho has become more vocal while keeping the same shy tone.
Confident in Sensha-Do. Other areas lacking.
Appears to be in a constant state of fear.
Constant state of fear? If this student was in a constant state of fear, how is she able to keep up with school? Something like that would have kept someone out from school.
Rirko's eyes bulged when he read a few lines down:
Participates in Sensha-Do club as tank commander/ team commander.
"How the hell is she the team commander? If she's in a constant state of fear, wouldn't this stress make it even worse?"
Taking out a book titled "Feelings and Associations. Flipping through the pages, he found a color wheel, with a primary feeling in the middle, with words that associate themselves closer with that feeling. Under "fearful":
Fearful
Scared, Anxious, Insecure, Weak, Rejected, Threatened
Helpless, Frightened, Overwhelmed, Worried, Inadequate, Inferior, Worthless, Insignificant, Excluded, Persecuted, Nervous, Exposed.
Scared, Anxious, Insecure, Weak, Rejected, Threatened
Helpless, Frightened, Overwhelmed, Worried, Inadequate, Inferior, Worthless, Insignificant, Excluded, Persecuted, Nervous, Exposed.
"Shit."
Rirko's food came. As he thanked the waiter, he drew a huge star beside her name.
Birds of a Feather
DawnofWar32
War is coming. Prepare yourselves!
- Location
- Butuan City, The Philippines
Uploader's Note: Another update! Consider this my gift to you on this wonderful day.
I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: So, here's another update. Again, formatting. I've been getting a lot of good responses from this story. Thank you so much.
Oorai Girl's Academy – Main Building
Miho gave a small yawn while walking towards homeroom. She didn't get enough sleep and for good reason. The happy memory of the past made her nostalgic for the life she had before. But, she would have to make do with what she had presently.
The journey to math class was filled with contemplation.
She appeared to be in deep thought, with her eyes fixated on the floor. "I have a good life here now. I'm not alone. I have friends. I'm happy."
Was she truly happy? She didn't question this until recently. All the trials and battles; all the enemies turned friends. It was due to her innocent naïve and open heart that attracted everyone to her. So why, when having all of this, did she feel completely alone. Her trance was broken with her knocking into someone. She gave a cute yelp.
It was Hana, Saori, and Mako, waiting for Miho at the homeroom entrance.
"Miporin? Are you alright?"
"Yes, I'm fine. Sorry for bumping into Hana, I wasn't watching where I was going."
Hana made a slight giggle, "It's alright. I'm just concerned about you, is all."
"Huh?"
"Yeah, you've been pretty out of it as of late," Saori noted. "Are you sure everything is fine?"
Now Miho could have told them about the dream. She could have told them about the pain in her chest and the thoughts she had been having. But then again…
"No, everything is good. It's just we're starting up Sensha-do again so there's been a lot on my mind. Strategies, teamwork, you know commander stuff."
"I suppose so."
"Didn't we tell you that we were going to help you with that?" Hana gave a reassuring smile. "It'll be just like last year! We'll work together to make sure everything runs smoothly."
Mako made a small smirk, "Providing Saori doesn't become melodramatic again."
Saori turned red-faced. "Now you're just picking on me! Apologize now!"
"No."
"Don't make me tell grandma on you!"
Mako's face turned pale. "Gran…grandma." She pouted a little, gave a sigh. "I'm sorry, happy?"
"Better."
Hana looked at the clock in the homeroom. "We better go, class is about to start." As the friends entered the classroom, Miho couldn't help but think.
"Everything is okay. It's good to have friends."
Homeroom started. The teacher entered and all the students bowed before taking their seats.
"Alright class, before we start today's lesson we'll be doing a little exercise today."
The students were confused. Soon whispers filled the room.
"Exercise?"
"Don't tell me it's a pop quiz."
"I'm pretty sure it's not."
"Then what is it?"
The Anglerfish crew were confused as well. What could it be?
The teacher took out the big envelope, emptied its contents upon the desk. Taking the first page out, she skimmed through the instruction sheet before taking the pile and giving each girl two pieces of paper.
Everyone, except the Anglerfish team.
The teacher began to read the instructions. "This exercise is a request from the school's counselor. To better understand the school's demographics, he's requested that each class complete a short quiz. Results will not be shared with anyone except with the appropriate staff. The class has thirty minutes to complete the quiz."
Saori raised her hand. "Excuse me, ma'am, we didn't get a quiz."
The teacher looked at the instructions once again. "Anyone that's on the Sensha-do team will be completing their quiz during lunch with the other team members today."
"Why is that?" Hana asked.
The teacher made a pondering pose. "It's because the school is giving special attention to the Sensha-do team."
"Special attention. What does that mean? Does it have to do with the new Sensha-do rule?" Miho couldn't understand why the need for secrecy.
"At any rate, while the other girls are completing the quiz, you may begin with today's work. Page twelve in your textbooks, questions 1-10. Alright class, begin!"
As the students began their quiz, the Anglerfish team did as instructed. In the corner of Miho's eye, she could see some students writing something, then rubbing it out, then writing something else.
Other students squinted at the paper, before writing something. And some took varying intervals of time to complete each question. Apparently, this quiz appeared easy for some and hard for others. Once the thirty minutes were up, all the students began to deliver their papers to the front desk. As the students sat, Miho asked one of the other students.
"So, how was the quiz?"
"Well," the student started, "it required a lot of thinking. They weren't anything academic. They were questions like "what are your interests?" or "what would you do in AB or C?"
"Oh…alright, thanks." The perplexed Miho silently pondered. "Why have a quiz like that? And why are the tank teams so important that it has to be done separately from everyone else?"
She didn't have to wait for an answer long. Soon, it was lunch hour. Anglerfish team made their way to the designated room.
"So, it's pretty much a personality test?" Mako asked.
Miho nodded, "Pretty much."
"So why are we doing it when everyone else did theirs early?"
"Well, the teacher said we were getting special attention," Hana replied.
"The entire Sensha-do team," Saori added.
When they arrived, they saw that the rest of the teams were there. The group saw Yukari sitting by the window, looking outside.
"Afternoon Yukarin."
Yukari's face lit up. "I hope the morning was good for you. Miss Nishizumi, you look pale, are you alright?"
Miho didn't notice her face. Did she look pale? "Huh? Oh, I feel fine."
"Alright." However, Yukari's concerned expression didn't change. In fact, all the Anglerfish were sharing the same face.
The doors slid open and Turtle team walked over to the front of the room.
Momo cleared her voice a couple of times before delivering her instructions. "Alright, everyone. All teams are to form up in a section of the room by teams. Everyone facing forward towards the front. It'll be just like taking an exam."
"Time's a-wastin," Anzu said cheerfully. "As soon as you're finished, you're good to go for lunch. We'll let your classes know you're taking some extra time."
Everyone liked the sound of that.
Momo popped her head outside of the door. "Quiet, the counselor's coming."
The girls scrambled to form sections and stood behind their desks.
Caesar looked around the room. "The counselor? He'll be the one conducting the test?"
Erwin, the one wearing the peaked cap, turned to Caesar, "it looks like it. We'll get to meet this counselor. I hope he isn't an old geezer."
A girl with the headband, Saemonza, peaked up, "or it could be a young woman."
"Dummy, the Student Council said it was a guy!"
"Right, I forgot."
"Quiet!" Momo said in a whisper. She then bolted from the doorway to the front of the room. The footsteps grew closer and closer. Everyone stood still, awaiting the arrival of the counselor.
Rirko stopped in front of the door. Behind the doors will be the Sensha-do team. The team that the faculty spoke highly about. Rirko had gotten acquainted with most of the staff and all of them said similarly the same thing. Nice school, Sensha-do's important, good girls, and we wouldn't have a job without Miho's help.
Rirko looked at his notes. "So, there are…one…two…thirty-two? Thirty-three? Hmm…I think I should have enough copies. Okay, this is it. We'll see how "good" these girls are. Rirko slid the doors closed and he was met with eyes of all shapes and colors. They stared at him as if they were staring into his soul. He looked around the room.
"So, these are the girls? The Sensha-do team? And their driving tanks?! Some are not even old to drive a car, let alone a tank!"
Rirko gave the warmest smile he could muster. "Good afternoon, ladies."
The room responded, "good afternoon!"
"Please take your seats." As the room of students began taking their seats, he motioned for the Student Council to find a spot in the room. As he made to the front of the room, Rirko noted that each of these girls showed a distinct physical characteristic. Some of them small like how they wear their uniform and some of them so different like accessories.
Rirko put his papers on the desk and cleared his throat. "Good afternoon. I'm sorry to say that again, it's a force of habit of mine."
The room gave a slight chuckle. However, it was more forced than anything.
"My name is Rirko Nagasawa. I am your new school's counselor serving for this school year. My job is to make sure that Oorai's psychological and emotional needs are being met. I'm also here to be able to lend an ear to any who feel they need to talk."
There were slight whispers in the room. Most of them came from Rabbit team.
"So, he really is a foreigner," Azusa noted.
Ayumi was wide-eyed, "and he's a looker too! Is he single?"
"Where does he come from? His skin is so different."
"Shh, you're saying that about our teacher," Yuki frantically whispered.
Aya tried to defuse the conversation, "Stop talking! If you guys don't shut up, he's gonna hear us."
"Too late, I think everyone can hear you."
Rabbit team turned and saw that everyone was looking at them. Momo gave an unapproving glare. An embarrassed red overcame the entire team.
Rirko sighed. "Even though this is a different country, I'm glad that there are some things that never change."
"Ladies, I don't wish to keep you from your lunch break. It's been a long morning for everyone. So, the faster we get this done, the faster we can have lunch. Hell, even I didn't even I have breakfast this morning. So, I'm pretty much hungry as you are."
The room gave another chuckle. However, this time, some of it was genuine.
Azusa* sighed. "Well, at least we didn't get in too much trouble."
Rirko then explained the instructions and handed out the quiz. "Each quiz has twenty questions each. Some of them are multiple choice and others are written answers. Each student will have 30 minutes to complete this. If you are stuck on a question, please move onto the next one and save it for later. Once you are finished, you're free to leave. Now then, let's begin."
For the next fifteen minutes, the sounds of writing pencils, scratching erasers and ruffling of papers filled the room. Once again, some students showed the same quirks as in the morning class. Rirko looked and walked around the room. He studied each student's physical features; hoping to learn more about them in the coming weeks. He was walking past Anglerfish's team when he caught something in the corner of his eye. There was Miho, with the multiple question portion done but the written questions not completed. In the answer lines were faded writing that was scrubbed. Her desk of littered with dirty eraser rubber.
Rirko had doubts. "So, this is Miho huh? She really looks small. And she's the tank commander for the team?"
Miho had an expression of cluelessness on her. For the first time in her life, she didn't understand what was asked of her. She read one of the questions in her head:
Miho looked at the question and thought. "Tanks, reading, collecting Boko dolls. But is that the right answer? Is that the answer he's looking for? It has to look like a high-schooler is answering the question, not someone from kindergarten…What do I put down?"
Miho was oblivious to the fact that the rest of Anglerfish team saw her inner turmoil. They gave each other a quick glance.
Mallard team was the first to finish. Sodoko and her team left their papers on the front desk and at the same time, did an about-face turn and headed towards the door. One by one, the other teams started to finish their quizzes. The size of the room became smaller and smaller until Anglerfish was the last one there. There were ten minutes left.
Rirko thought it peculiar that five people were taking a long time to finish a simple quiz. Then it hit him. Were they waiting? Waiting for someone from their group to finish?
"Excuse me, ladies?" Anglerfish team turned towards Rirko. He took a sip of water and headed towards them.
"I find it hard to believe that it's taking all five of you a long time to finish a twenty-question quiz. So, God's watching, how many of you are actually done?"
"Um…The test is very hard is all," Saori explained. "It's not easy thinking about the questions."
"Really." Rirko pondered a bit. "There must be a reason why they're doing this. Why are they stalling." He then saw the eraser clippings on Miho's desk. Were they doing it for Miho's sake?
"I'm going to say this to all of you. There's no right or wrong answer. I'm not going to give you all a hard time if you answer the questions in a particular way."
Anglerfish team looked at Rirko and then looked at each other.
"Um, girls?" The team turned to Miho. "I'm almost done. Go on ahead and I'll meet you in the cafeteria. I just want to make sure that my answers are the best I can make it."
"Miporin," Saori whispered.
"Are you sure," Yukari asked. "Really sure?"
Miho gave a smile, "Yes, I'm sure. Now get going, I know everyone is hungry!" One by one, starting with Yukari, they took their quiz to the front of the desk and headed towards the door. They were walking painfully slow while looking at Miho. The last one was Mako who stared at her for a full minute before exiting the room and closing the door behind her.
Now it was just Rirko and Miho. Dead silence.
"You're not almost done, are you?"
Miho shook her head. She looked absolutely dejected as she looked at her paper.
"Um, we can forget about the time limit. Like I said, answer the question as best you can."
Miho looked at him, "Do I really have to answer all of them?"
"Now she has apprehension on answering these questions. Wait… Miho, do you understand what the questions are asking you?"
She dropped her papers on the desk and looked down. After a while, she silently shook her head.
"Alright, would you like some help in understanding what the questions are asking you?"
She stood still for a moment before silently shaking her head. Rirko took a seat right next to her and looked at the paper. There were four questions left and they were all written answers.
"All right, the first question. What three words would I use to describe myself?"
"Umm…I…"
"Hmm…think back to interests. What does she like. You're the captain of the Sensha-do team, right?"
Miho's face lit up and she nodded happily.
"Okay, when you're commanding a tank, what do you need to be?"
"Confident, precise, and strategic!" Rirko looked at her and smiled.
"Oh!" She then wrote the words down. "Next is…"
"If others could describe me, what would it be? Have you ever heard someone compliment you?
Miho pondered this for a moment. "Yes! It was before the final match at the nationals, the tank commander for Glorianna, Darjeeling, said that I was a peculiar person. That I make friends with my enemies and my open and friendly personality is what makes me an attractive person."
"Alright then, write that down. We got two more questions to go, you're doing great."
Miho's mood was completely changed. From gloom and depressing to passionate and enthusiastic. Rirko saw that when it came to tanks, she was very confident in this regard. No wonder she was the tank commander.
"Next is…If I could be any animal, what would it be?"
"Boko the bear," Miho immediately answered.
Rirko groaned, "Don't tell me you're a fan of that beaten-up bear thing."
"Hey, Boko's the best! I have a lot of Boko dolls back home!"
"Okay, okay," not the way Rirko would have liked the question answered but something is better than nothing. "We got one more."
"Let's do it then!"
"The last question is…What is my greatest desire?"
Miho became silent again. Rirko looked at her and had to admit that the mood from happy back to the gloom was unnerving.
Then, as in a whisper, Miho answered, "My greatest desire, is to be with my sister again."
Rirko's heart dropped like a rock. Inadvertently, she had hit him right in the feels. As Miho took the pencil to write in her answer, Rirko noticed that it was shaking. She was writing very slowly.
Now a person would have wanted to press onto the line of questioning. Who is your sister? What happened to her? But he knew that this wasn't the time and place. Plus, it would have been very insensitive. Gently, Rirko put his hand on hers and took the pencil away. A single tear rolled on her check.
"You don't need to write that down. That's good enough for me." Miho was looking down, silent again. Rirko had to change the mood and quick.
"So what needs to be done for the teams to get back to the nationals?"
Miho had a surprised look on her face. She thought for a moment. "Well, teamwork is a major thing. Our team just got together last year and we'll be expecting more recruits this year for the new tanks."
"Yes?"
"As well, we need the tank commanders to start thinking individually. I don't want them to rely on me all the time."
"I'm pretty sure that you have the leadership qualities necessary to teach them to delegate themselves."
"Not just me, everyone! Everyone has this quality whether they know it or not. We are all part of this team so it will take every one of us to win!"
Rirko took Miho's paper and walked towards the front of the room. She followed him up to the front.
"Is that what Sensha-do about? Is it about winning?"
"No…" Miho's gaze turned serious and fixated on Rirko. "Sensha-do's all about being a team and having fun. Although I'm trying to find my own way of Sensha-do, I believe that's what the sport is truly is all about."
"Your own way of doing Sensha-do?" Rirko was perplexed. "You mean there are many ways of doing this sport?"
"Yes. Everyone has a different style. But I'm trying to find my own way of doing things that involves all my friends."
"That's a very optimistic view of Sensha-do. There are a lot of people who take sports seriously. But I'm glad that the future generation of Sensha-do is on the right path."
At this, Miho gave a smile, "Thank you, I'm glad you think so."
At this, Miho gave a smile, "Thank you, I'm glad you think so."
"You best get to your friends. I believe they're waiting for you."
"Kay!" As Miho skipped towards the entrance, she turned to Rirko. "Thank you for your help, Mr. Nagasawa." She gave a slight bow.
Rirko waved as he cleaned up the desk. When she left, Rirko was left to think about all the events that had transpired.
"She doesn't have a confident view on herself. She was afraid that any answer she gave would be the wrong one. And she was afraid of being punished for not doing well on this quiz. Just what happened with this girl? Why is she like this? Confident in Sensha-do but in everything else; she an enigma. And her sister; what's up with that?"
As he pondered the thoughts in his head, he also felt that he could know about Miho more. Before he disregarded her as weak and fragile but now after speaking to her, he saw her as a passionate and young individual with dreams for Sensha-do. Smiling at the prospect of the impact she would be able to make, he gathered his things and headed towards the door.
A/N: Again, I've been working on this story for a while now. When someone favorites or reviews it makes my heart happy. Thanks again for reading.
*U/N: In the source material, the author misspelled Azusa's name, so I made the necessary corrections for this version.
I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: So, here's another update. Again, formatting. I've been getting a lot of good responses from this story. Thank you so much.
Oorai Girl's Academy – Main Building
Miho gave a small yawn while walking towards homeroom. She didn't get enough sleep and for good reason. The happy memory of the past made her nostalgic for the life she had before. But, she would have to make do with what she had presently.
The journey to math class was filled with contemplation.
She appeared to be in deep thought, with her eyes fixated on the floor. "I have a good life here now. I'm not alone. I have friends. I'm happy."
Was she truly happy? She didn't question this until recently. All the trials and battles; all the enemies turned friends. It was due to her innocent naïve and open heart that attracted everyone to her. So why, when having all of this, did she feel completely alone. Her trance was broken with her knocking into someone. She gave a cute yelp.
It was Hana, Saori, and Mako, waiting for Miho at the homeroom entrance.
"Miporin? Are you alright?"
"Yes, I'm fine. Sorry for bumping into Hana, I wasn't watching where I was going."
Hana made a slight giggle, "It's alright. I'm just concerned about you, is all."
"Huh?"
"Yeah, you've been pretty out of it as of late," Saori noted. "Are you sure everything is fine?"
Now Miho could have told them about the dream. She could have told them about the pain in her chest and the thoughts she had been having. But then again…
"No, everything is good. It's just we're starting up Sensha-do again so there's been a lot on my mind. Strategies, teamwork, you know commander stuff."
"I suppose so."
"Didn't we tell you that we were going to help you with that?" Hana gave a reassuring smile. "It'll be just like last year! We'll work together to make sure everything runs smoothly."
Mako made a small smirk, "Providing Saori doesn't become melodramatic again."
Saori turned red-faced. "Now you're just picking on me! Apologize now!"
"No."
"Don't make me tell grandma on you!"
Mako's face turned pale. "Gran…grandma." She pouted a little, gave a sigh. "I'm sorry, happy?"
"Better."
Hana looked at the clock in the homeroom. "We better go, class is about to start." As the friends entered the classroom, Miho couldn't help but think.
"Everything is okay. It's good to have friends."
Homeroom started. The teacher entered and all the students bowed before taking their seats.
"Alright class, before we start today's lesson we'll be doing a little exercise today."
The students were confused. Soon whispers filled the room.
"Exercise?"
"Don't tell me it's a pop quiz."
"I'm pretty sure it's not."
"Then what is it?"
The Anglerfish crew were confused as well. What could it be?
The teacher took out the big envelope, emptied its contents upon the desk. Taking the first page out, she skimmed through the instruction sheet before taking the pile and giving each girl two pieces of paper.
Everyone, except the Anglerfish team.
The teacher began to read the instructions. "This exercise is a request from the school's counselor. To better understand the school's demographics, he's requested that each class complete a short quiz. Results will not be shared with anyone except with the appropriate staff. The class has thirty minutes to complete the quiz."
Saori raised her hand. "Excuse me, ma'am, we didn't get a quiz."
The teacher looked at the instructions once again. "Anyone that's on the Sensha-do team will be completing their quiz during lunch with the other team members today."
"Why is that?" Hana asked.
The teacher made a pondering pose. "It's because the school is giving special attention to the Sensha-do team."
"Special attention. What does that mean? Does it have to do with the new Sensha-do rule?" Miho couldn't understand why the need for secrecy.
"At any rate, while the other girls are completing the quiz, you may begin with today's work. Page twelve in your textbooks, questions 1-10. Alright class, begin!"
As the students began their quiz, the Anglerfish team did as instructed. In the corner of Miho's eye, she could see some students writing something, then rubbing it out, then writing something else.
Other students squinted at the paper, before writing something. And some took varying intervals of time to complete each question. Apparently, this quiz appeared easy for some and hard for others. Once the thirty minutes were up, all the students began to deliver their papers to the front desk. As the students sat, Miho asked one of the other students.
"So, how was the quiz?"
"Well," the student started, "it required a lot of thinking. They weren't anything academic. They were questions like "what are your interests?" or "what would you do in AB or C?"
"Oh…alright, thanks." The perplexed Miho silently pondered. "Why have a quiz like that? And why are the tank teams so important that it has to be done separately from everyone else?"
She didn't have to wait for an answer long. Soon, it was lunch hour. Anglerfish team made their way to the designated room.
"So, it's pretty much a personality test?" Mako asked.
Miho nodded, "Pretty much."
"So why are we doing it when everyone else did theirs early?"
"Well, the teacher said we were getting special attention," Hana replied.
"The entire Sensha-do team," Saori added.
When they arrived, they saw that the rest of the teams were there. The group saw Yukari sitting by the window, looking outside.
"Afternoon Yukarin."
Yukari's face lit up. "I hope the morning was good for you. Miss Nishizumi, you look pale, are you alright?"
Miho didn't notice her face. Did she look pale? "Huh? Oh, I feel fine."
"Alright." However, Yukari's concerned expression didn't change. In fact, all the Anglerfish were sharing the same face.
The doors slid open and Turtle team walked over to the front of the room.
Momo cleared her voice a couple of times before delivering her instructions. "Alright, everyone. All teams are to form up in a section of the room by teams. Everyone facing forward towards the front. It'll be just like taking an exam."
"Time's a-wastin," Anzu said cheerfully. "As soon as you're finished, you're good to go for lunch. We'll let your classes know you're taking some extra time."
Everyone liked the sound of that.
Momo popped her head outside of the door. "Quiet, the counselor's coming."
The girls scrambled to form sections and stood behind their desks.
Caesar looked around the room. "The counselor? He'll be the one conducting the test?"
Erwin, the one wearing the peaked cap, turned to Caesar, "it looks like it. We'll get to meet this counselor. I hope he isn't an old geezer."
A girl with the headband, Saemonza, peaked up, "or it could be a young woman."
"Dummy, the Student Council said it was a guy!"
"Right, I forgot."
"Quiet!" Momo said in a whisper. She then bolted from the doorway to the front of the room. The footsteps grew closer and closer. Everyone stood still, awaiting the arrival of the counselor.
Rirko stopped in front of the door. Behind the doors will be the Sensha-do team. The team that the faculty spoke highly about. Rirko had gotten acquainted with most of the staff and all of them said similarly the same thing. Nice school, Sensha-do's important, good girls, and we wouldn't have a job without Miho's help.
Rirko looked at his notes. "So, there are…one…two…thirty-two? Thirty-three? Hmm…I think I should have enough copies. Okay, this is it. We'll see how "good" these girls are. Rirko slid the doors closed and he was met with eyes of all shapes and colors. They stared at him as if they were staring into his soul. He looked around the room.
"So, these are the girls? The Sensha-do team? And their driving tanks?! Some are not even old to drive a car, let alone a tank!"
Rirko gave the warmest smile he could muster. "Good afternoon, ladies."
The room responded, "good afternoon!"
"Please take your seats." As the room of students began taking their seats, he motioned for the Student Council to find a spot in the room. As he made to the front of the room, Rirko noted that each of these girls showed a distinct physical characteristic. Some of them small like how they wear their uniform and some of them so different like accessories.
Rirko put his papers on the desk and cleared his throat. "Good afternoon. I'm sorry to say that again, it's a force of habit of mine."
The room gave a slight chuckle. However, it was more forced than anything.
"My name is Rirko Nagasawa. I am your new school's counselor serving for this school year. My job is to make sure that Oorai's psychological and emotional needs are being met. I'm also here to be able to lend an ear to any who feel they need to talk."
There were slight whispers in the room. Most of them came from Rabbit team.
"So, he really is a foreigner," Azusa noted.
Ayumi was wide-eyed, "and he's a looker too! Is he single?"
"Where does he come from? His skin is so different."
"Shh, you're saying that about our teacher," Yuki frantically whispered.
Aya tried to defuse the conversation, "Stop talking! If you guys don't shut up, he's gonna hear us."
"Too late, I think everyone can hear you."
Rabbit team turned and saw that everyone was looking at them. Momo gave an unapproving glare. An embarrassed red overcame the entire team.
Rirko sighed. "Even though this is a different country, I'm glad that there are some things that never change."
"Ladies, I don't wish to keep you from your lunch break. It's been a long morning for everyone. So, the faster we get this done, the faster we can have lunch. Hell, even I didn't even I have breakfast this morning. So, I'm pretty much hungry as you are."
The room gave another chuckle. However, this time, some of it was genuine.
Azusa* sighed. "Well, at least we didn't get in too much trouble."
Rirko then explained the instructions and handed out the quiz. "Each quiz has twenty questions each. Some of them are multiple choice and others are written answers. Each student will have 30 minutes to complete this. If you are stuck on a question, please move onto the next one and save it for later. Once you are finished, you're free to leave. Now then, let's begin."
For the next fifteen minutes, the sounds of writing pencils, scratching erasers and ruffling of papers filled the room. Once again, some students showed the same quirks as in the morning class. Rirko looked and walked around the room. He studied each student's physical features; hoping to learn more about them in the coming weeks. He was walking past Anglerfish's team when he caught something in the corner of his eye. There was Miho, with the multiple question portion done but the written questions not completed. In the answer lines were faded writing that was scrubbed. Her desk of littered with dirty eraser rubber.
Rirko had doubts. "So, this is Miho huh? She really looks small. And she's the tank commander for the team?"
Miho had an expression of cluelessness on her. For the first time in her life, she didn't understand what was asked of her. She read one of the questions in her head:
What are your interests?
Miho looked at the question and thought. "Tanks, reading, collecting Boko dolls. But is that the right answer? Is that the answer he's looking for? It has to look like a high-schooler is answering the question, not someone from kindergarten…What do I put down?"
Miho was oblivious to the fact that the rest of Anglerfish team saw her inner turmoil. They gave each other a quick glance.
Mallard team was the first to finish. Sodoko and her team left their papers on the front desk and at the same time, did an about-face turn and headed towards the door. One by one, the other teams started to finish their quizzes. The size of the room became smaller and smaller until Anglerfish was the last one there. There were ten minutes left.
Rirko thought it peculiar that five people were taking a long time to finish a simple quiz. Then it hit him. Were they waiting? Waiting for someone from their group to finish?
"Excuse me, ladies?" Anglerfish team turned towards Rirko. He took a sip of water and headed towards them.
"I find it hard to believe that it's taking all five of you a long time to finish a twenty-question quiz. So, God's watching, how many of you are actually done?"
"Um…The test is very hard is all," Saori explained. "It's not easy thinking about the questions."
"Really." Rirko pondered a bit. "There must be a reason why they're doing this. Why are they stalling." He then saw the eraser clippings on Miho's desk. Were they doing it for Miho's sake?
"I'm going to say this to all of you. There's no right or wrong answer. I'm not going to give you all a hard time if you answer the questions in a particular way."
Anglerfish team looked at Rirko and then looked at each other.
"Um, girls?" The team turned to Miho. "I'm almost done. Go on ahead and I'll meet you in the cafeteria. I just want to make sure that my answers are the best I can make it."
"Miporin," Saori whispered.
"Are you sure," Yukari asked. "Really sure?"
Miho gave a smile, "Yes, I'm sure. Now get going, I know everyone is hungry!" One by one, starting with Yukari, they took their quiz to the front of the desk and headed towards the door. They were walking painfully slow while looking at Miho. The last one was Mako who stared at her for a full minute before exiting the room and closing the door behind her.
Now it was just Rirko and Miho. Dead silence.
"You're not almost done, are you?"
Miho shook her head. She looked absolutely dejected as she looked at her paper.
"Um, we can forget about the time limit. Like I said, answer the question as best you can."
Miho looked at him, "Do I really have to answer all of them?"
"Now she has apprehension on answering these questions. Wait… Miho, do you understand what the questions are asking you?"
She dropped her papers on the desk and looked down. After a while, she silently shook her head.
"Alright, would you like some help in understanding what the questions are asking you?"
She stood still for a moment before silently shaking her head. Rirko took a seat right next to her and looked at the paper. There were four questions left and they were all written answers.
"All right, the first question. What three words would I use to describe myself?"
"Umm…I…"
"Hmm…think back to interests. What does she like. You're the captain of the Sensha-do team, right?"
Miho's face lit up and she nodded happily.
"Okay, when you're commanding a tank, what do you need to be?"
"Confident, precise, and strategic!" Rirko looked at her and smiled.
"Oh!" She then wrote the words down. "Next is…"
"If others could describe me, what would it be? Have you ever heard someone compliment you?
Miho pondered this for a moment. "Yes! It was before the final match at the nationals, the tank commander for Glorianna, Darjeeling, said that I was a peculiar person. That I make friends with my enemies and my open and friendly personality is what makes me an attractive person."
"Alright then, write that down. We got two more questions to go, you're doing great."
Miho's mood was completely changed. From gloom and depressing to passionate and enthusiastic. Rirko saw that when it came to tanks, she was very confident in this regard. No wonder she was the tank commander.
"Next is…If I could be any animal, what would it be?"
"Boko the bear," Miho immediately answered.
Rirko groaned, "Don't tell me you're a fan of that beaten-up bear thing."
"Hey, Boko's the best! I have a lot of Boko dolls back home!"
"Okay, okay," not the way Rirko would have liked the question answered but something is better than nothing. "We got one more."
"Let's do it then!"
"The last question is…What is my greatest desire?"
Miho became silent again. Rirko looked at her and had to admit that the mood from happy back to the gloom was unnerving.
Then, as in a whisper, Miho answered, "My greatest desire, is to be with my sister again."
Rirko's heart dropped like a rock. Inadvertently, she had hit him right in the feels. As Miho took the pencil to write in her answer, Rirko noticed that it was shaking. She was writing very slowly.
Now a person would have wanted to press onto the line of questioning. Who is your sister? What happened to her? But he knew that this wasn't the time and place. Plus, it would have been very insensitive. Gently, Rirko put his hand on hers and took the pencil away. A single tear rolled on her check.
"You don't need to write that down. That's good enough for me." Miho was looking down, silent again. Rirko had to change the mood and quick.
"So what needs to be done for the teams to get back to the nationals?"
Miho had a surprised look on her face. She thought for a moment. "Well, teamwork is a major thing. Our team just got together last year and we'll be expecting more recruits this year for the new tanks."
"Yes?"
"As well, we need the tank commanders to start thinking individually. I don't want them to rely on me all the time."
"I'm pretty sure that you have the leadership qualities necessary to teach them to delegate themselves."
"Not just me, everyone! Everyone has this quality whether they know it or not. We are all part of this team so it will take every one of us to win!"
Rirko took Miho's paper and walked towards the front of the room. She followed him up to the front.
"Is that what Sensha-do about? Is it about winning?"
"No…" Miho's gaze turned serious and fixated on Rirko. "Sensha-do's all about being a team and having fun. Although I'm trying to find my own way of Sensha-do, I believe that's what the sport is truly is all about."
"Your own way of doing Sensha-do?" Rirko was perplexed. "You mean there are many ways of doing this sport?"
"Yes. Everyone has a different style. But I'm trying to find my own way of doing things that involves all my friends."
"That's a very optimistic view of Sensha-do. There are a lot of people who take sports seriously. But I'm glad that the future generation of Sensha-do is on the right path."
At this, Miho gave a smile, "Thank you, I'm glad you think so."
At this, Miho gave a smile, "Thank you, I'm glad you think so."
"You best get to your friends. I believe they're waiting for you."
"Kay!" As Miho skipped towards the entrance, she turned to Rirko. "Thank you for your help, Mr. Nagasawa." She gave a slight bow.
Rirko waved as he cleaned up the desk. When she left, Rirko was left to think about all the events that had transpired.
"She doesn't have a confident view on herself. She was afraid that any answer she gave would be the wrong one. And she was afraid of being punished for not doing well on this quiz. Just what happened with this girl? Why is she like this? Confident in Sensha-do but in everything else; she an enigma. And her sister; what's up with that?"
As he pondered the thoughts in his head, he also felt that he could know about Miho more. Before he disregarded her as weak and fragile but now after speaking to her, he saw her as a passionate and young individual with dreams for Sensha-do. Smiling at the prospect of the impact she would be able to make, he gathered his things and headed towards the door.
A/N: Again, I've been working on this story for a while now. When someone favorites or reviews it makes my heart happy. Thanks again for reading.
*U/N: In the source material, the author misspelled Azusa's name, so I made the necessary corrections for this version.
Back in the Saddle
DawnofWar32
War is coming. Prepare yourselves!
- Location
- Butuan City, The Philippines
Uploader's Note: I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: Before starting on this chapter, I want to make a few things clear.
A lot of problems with Girl und Panzer fanfiction is that there are some stories that go really, really technical when it comes to strategies, weaponry and the like. They go in-depth and it usually takes about two/three chapters to cover an entire match.
I'm not that type of writer. Basically, I write about what happens before and after the match and then the key points that happened during. I will NOT, repeat will NOT be going in-depth on guns, strategies and conversations. I have a lot to write and I want to primary focus on the characters. If the information is important to the plot, then I'll add it in. So sorry if this irks some people but that's how I roll.
Your support on this is greatly appreciated. Next chapter is a long one so let's see how this one goes.
Oorai Girl's Academy – Tank Training Grounds - Afternoon
"Fire!"
The sound of the StugG III's assault gun echoed throughout the tank training grounds. Type 89 had no chance to retaliate for as soon as the shell connected, the white flag popped right out.
Meanwhile, Miho and Ami were surveying the grounds from the control tower. "That's enough! All tanks have been rendered inoperable. The winner is Hippo team!"
Miho thought it would be best to run a mock battle to get the team back into the swing of things. However, instead of tank teams, it would be a free-for-all with the last team standing. This day, it was Hippo team who stood out on top. Further, she personally did not participate in the battle. She wanted to see how Anglerfish would do without her leadership and guidance. They were knocked out during the middle of the skirmish but all things considered, they did well. She noted that Yukari would make a good commander, even if her tactics were rough around the edges.
"Tank retrieval teams are being mobilized, everyone is to meet up back at the tank shed. Good battle!" Ami then turned to Miho. "Well, commander, what do you think?"
Miho pondered for a moment, then spoke. "I think we've gotten a bit overconfident over the summer."
"Oh?"
"Yeah. Most of the teams fell for each other's ambushes although most of them could adapt to the situation and use the confusion to their advantage. And then there's Rabbit."
During the battle, there was confusion between Mallard team and Rabbit team. Rabbit team suggested using Mallard as bait and lure out Hippo and Duck who formed an alliance before. Rabbit assured Mallard that they would take out the attackers before being hit. However, when Mallard used an open field to lay out the trap, Anteater and Leopon came out of nowhere and started to fire. Shocked by these recent developments, Aya became nervous and open fired on Mallard team, knocking them out, before engaging Anteater and Leopon. Sodoko was none too happy.
While Rabbit was engaging with Anteater and Leopon, Anglerfish outflanked Rabbit and shot, knocking them out. They, in turn, were knocked out by Hippo by a long-range shot. At this point, Anteater used the momentary confusion to attempt to knock out Leopon. However, Leopon had the same idea. Both shots each knocked each other out.
It was this time Duck team engaged with Turtle team who came north of them. The Panzer light tank was no match for the Type 89. When Turtle was taken out, Hippo used the opportunity to fire another long-ranged and knock Duck out.
"I'm pretty sure that Rabbit and Mallard were working together. Rabbit shooting Mallard must have been an accident. But I'm sure Sodoko will see it differently." And did she ever. When everyone was back at the sheds, Sodoko went straight over to Rabbit team. Rabbit team was expecting Mallard, demanding an explanation.
"What the hell, Azusa?!" Sodoko was livid. "Yuki told me you wouldn't shoot at us while handling Hippo and Duck!"
"That was my fault," Aya admitted. "When Anteater and Leopon came over the ridge, and shots began to run down, I mistook your tank for another team."
"Mis-took?! It's a frikkin Char B1, how could you mistake that for any other tank?!"
Ayumi joined the fray, "Leave Aya alone, she said she was sorry!"
"Well sorry isn't good enough. If we have another free-for-all match, we're going to go straight for you!" Moyoko and Nozomi backed up Sodoko.
"We said it was an accident!" Azusa shouted back as she defended Rabbit team. "Why are you so worked up over this!?"
While Mallard and Rabbit argued about what happened, Anteater and Leopon were at odds at the betrayal of one another.
"Why did you betray us?! What's your problem?" shouted Nekonya.
"You betrayed us first," Satoko yelled back.
"Yeah, you tried to shoot at us while we were distracted," added Suzuki.
Piyotan retaliated, "Always take an advantage of a situation. Video games taught us to expect betrayal, especially from temporary allies!"
"Besides, if someone is in the wrong, it's you guys!" Momoga added.
Hoshino raised her voice, "Are you kidding me? That's not sportsmanship, that's just plain cheap! You got no guts, you got nothing!"
Anteater was in a state of unbelief, "HUH?"
The tensions were high as the four teams argued with one another. Who did what, what you didn't do, how could you do this, etc. Anglerfish, Hippo and Turtle were outside the entire thing. Momo tried to forcefully calm everyone down with her loud, stern voice but even with that, the arguments were only drowning out her voice.
"I can't do it, president," Momo resigned herself. "They're all too loud!"
Yuzu frowned and sighed, "this is very unbecoming. They're all supposed to be teammates."
Oryo, the bespectacled girl, noted, "This reminds me of the Sengoku period all over again."
"Or the cold war between Russia and the US," added Erwin.
"Or the start of WWI, when Archduke Ferdinand was killed," added Caesar.
"THAT'S IT," the other members of Hippo team yelled.
"Geez, when is Miho gonna get here?" asked Mako. It was apparent that she was getting annoyed by all the arguing. "All of this talk is making me mad."
Hana closed her eyes and sighed, "Well, Momo tried to calm everyone down, but all she did was add fuel to the fire."
"It's gonna be hard for Miporin to have everyone calm down," Saori said concerningly.
"If anyone can calm down a bunch of girls, it would be Miss Nishizumi," Yukari said confidently.
"BWEEEEEEEP!" Everyone stopped talking to find the course of the sound. It was Miss Chono with a whistle. She turned to Miho.
"Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later."
Miho agreed, "Yes. It was bound to happen."
"Wha-cha talking about?" Anzu asked.
Miho made her way to the front of the teams. "No team is perfect. There will be days when the cohesion of the teams will be tested. Despite everything we've been through, in the heat of battle, all rational thought is tossed out and we do actions that can cost us. That's why I said it was important to get to know the other teams, outside of Sensha-Do practice. So, we understand one another and more importantly…why we do the actions that we do."
Miho turned to Mallard team first, "Sodoko, I get that you're sore about getting shot at by Rabbit team. But what would you have done in their shoes? If you see an enemy coming towards you, do you wait or shoot?"
Sodoko was lost over this thought. "I…uh."
She then turned to Anteater, "Nekonya, remember that we are a team. What are the chances of us turning on you and Anteater?"
Nekonya was red-faced, "yeah, I forgot that this is real-life and not a video game. I'm sorry, I just had bad experiences in alliances that broke up and attacked us."
Miho raised her voice, not in anger, but in passion. "And this goes for everyone here! Remember, we are a team! We lose together, we win together, we got each other's back! Think about what it means for you and your team if things like this keep happening!"
The teams whispered in agreement.
"She's correct," Ami added. "Teamwork is important, especially when you have an exhibition match with Glorianna coming up."
Everyone was surprised by the news. "We're going up against Glorianna?" Yukari asked. "When?"
"Two weeks from now," Yuzu answered. "Ever since the nationals, they wanted a rematch, just like every other school. It couldn't be an official tournament match but they would settle with an exhibition."
Now the mood has completely changed. Once discord reigned, was now back to the team that can work together. Ami gave a grin, "Miho, wrap this up. I have a meeting with another representative from the federation. Good luck, commander!"
The sheds rang aloud with "bye sensei." The teams then turned to Miho.
"Uh, yes! I want team commanders to think about strategies that we can use against Glorianna. Most possible, they may have been able to upgrade their fleet so think about creative ways to win! Remember also to take into account calculated risks! I don't want any of the girls in unnecessary danger."
"Do we need reconnaissance for the match?" Yukari asked, with a sparkle in her eye. Miho shuttered.
"We'll cross that bridge when we get there."
"Okkkkkaaay."
"Remember to spend time off the field with one another! I expect you all to learn something from each other in one week's time!"
"HAI!"
"Practice is over for today," Momo concluded.
Came the response, "Good work everyone!"
"Listen, I'm sorry about what happened." Sodoko and the rest of Mallard team bowed.
"It's okay, I accept your apology," Azusa sighed. "But more importantly, we can take this opportunity to learn from our mistakes and move on."
Aya had the look like a puppy was caught doing something it wasn't supposed to do. "Yeah, I'm sorry too. I really got scared and shot without thinking. How can we make it up to you?"
Ayumi pondered, "Wait, I got it. Why don't we invite Mallard team to our weekly movie night! We can watch Full Metal Jacket!"
"You wanna watch that movie again?" Karina moaned. "That's the third time this year!"
"Well, I'm sure they haven't seen it!"
"Well…um…" Sodoko was going to turn down the invitation but then remembered what Miho had said about spending time together.
Sodoko gave a bow. "Thank you very much, we accept your invitation." Moyoko and Nozomi didn't get what was happening but they followed their leader's lead.
"You were betrayed by your teammates?" Satoko asked.
"Yeah, Nekonya hasn't still gotten over it," Momoga replied. "Nekonya let it go! That was a month ago!"
Nekonya started to get worked up, "But we spent two weeks planning that raid! And then in the middle of it, they wipe us out and took our stuff!"
Tsuchiya scratched her head. "Geez, I'm sorry. That's a sad way to go."
"I know, right!"
Satoko put her arm around Nekonya. "Listen, we're having a volleyball practice after Sensha-do practice tomorrow. Why don't you join us, take off some steam?"
Nekonya turned to her teammates, and then to Leopon. "Can I hit the ball as hard as I can?" Satoko gave a huge grin.
"Only if the ball is pointed downwards!"
"Finally, glad that's over," Saori said as she stretched herself. "Alright right, how about some dinner?!"
Mako smacked her lips. "YESSSS!"
"Where should we go?" asked Hana.
"How about with us!?" Anglerfish turned around to see Hippo and Yukari.
"Hippo is inviting us to their favorite sushi place!" Yukari was enthusiastic. "Plus, Miss Nishizumi, this will be a good time to get to know Hippo team!"
Miho gave a smile, "Yes, I suppose it would. Turtle team, would you like to join us?"
"Thanks for the offer," Anzu replied with a smile, "but we got Student Council stuff to take care of. Just enjoy the food doubly for us."
Yuzu nodded, "see you girls later!" As the three members of Turtle Team moved off, all the other teams dispersed.
Sushi Center – Oorai Carrier Ship - Evening
The place was packed for a weekday evening. They wouldn't have gotten a spot if Saemonza hadn't gotten a hookup from one of the managers there. They got a four-seat stall in the private area of the restaurant. The group took in the atmosphere. The restaurant screamed ancient Japan with old samurai suits, koi fish statues and a flowing waterfall display in the middle.
Yukari was impressed, "Hippo, you really know how to show your guests a good time!"
"Thank my friend Ayane," Saemonza said with a grin. "She said she owed me one after I helped her get a job here."
Hana asked, "What did you do?"
"I had her borrow one of my swords. The owner was so ecstatic seeing a genuine samurai sword that she hired her on the spot!"
The girls were amazed at the story. It was the first time the history buff's love of ancient arts proved useful.
For 3,000 yen each, it was all-you-can-eat. It was expensive, but the food quality was second to none. While eating, they spoke about history (of course), the Sengoku period specifically. After a while, the girls talked about the Sensha-do federation and what would happen if it was realistic. There was a debate about whether the sport could be viable. Miho was outspoken in a dislike of a realistic Sensha-do. She finished speaking for the other girls to participate.
As the roundtable continued, Miho overheard a family right behind their stall. It sounded like a man, woman, and their young daughter.
"So, what did you do today?" asked the man. Miho could only hear muffles.
"Honey, don't eat with your mouth full." The woman doted on the child.
"Mommy was there for career day!"
"Was she now!? Was everyone excited?"
"Yeah. Everyone said how it must be cool to be a chef!"
"Of course, it's really nice to work with food and try new things each day."
The daughter then asked a question. "Mommy, is it okay that I don't become a chef? I mean, I like drawing a lot and I…"
"Honey." The mother said in a soft tone. "You can be whoever you want to be and I'll still love you."
"You mean it?!"
The man agreed. "Of course. You're very young but if you set your mind to it, you can be whoever you want to be someday."
"Thank you! Thank you, thank you!"
The family conversation hit home for Miho. As the conversations swirled around her, she reflected on her own relationship with her mother.
The two Nishizumi daughters and their mother. This was a time when both were very young. They were being introduced to the Nishizumi style.
"Always advance. Don't retreat. To retreat is to lose and to lose is to forfeit your life."
"Isn't Sensha-do a sport, mother?" Miho innocently asked. "People don't die, do they? It isn't warring?"
"They should die for the shame they bring to themselves and their family upon losing. Listen, my daughters. Sensha-do is a time-honored tradition for the Nishizumi family. Sooner or later, you too will inherit the style and continue the legacy of our family."
"But what about the people you play with?"
"You do NOT play Sensha-do! You compete to win. For winning is all that matters in Sensha-do. Crush your enemies so they never again rise against you. Do this and you will survive. Do you girls understand." The girls looked at one another only for a moment.
Maho gave the reply. "Yes, mother…"
"Yes…mother…"
"Miporin? Miporin?"
"Huh?" Miho spaced out again. Saori was calling her for the last minute or so.
"Miporin, are you alright? You weren't answering me."
"Oh, yes. I was thinking about tank stuff."
"Alright. Well, Erwin suggested we list of interests so we have something to share with everyone. So, what're your interests besides Sensha-do?"
"Interests? Uh…" Miho had to think about this question. It was like that during the questionnaire. "My interests…interests…well, I like reading books and collecting Boko dolls!"
"Sweet, what else?" Now everyone wanted to know what Miho would say.
"Um…uh…" Hana noticed Miho was struggling. "We can get back to Miho later. I'm interested in flower arrangements."
"No duh," Mako replied.
"Mako, apologize. That was not nice."
"Uhhhh…." Everyone laughed at the exchange. Although Miho looked like she was having a good time, it was only a mask. Underneath that mask was a face of pain and sadness. The very fact that her mother introduced her to Sensha-do in such a way, she believed, was not right. So why did she endure it for all those years?
Miho's Apartment - Night
That night, Miho stayed up late. She was making future strategies for Oorai's match with Glorianna. She knew it was a weeknight. She knew she had to get up early tomorrow. But she stayed up late. The strategies were just a distraction to keep her mind off her troubles.
"I'm fine…I'm fine…I'm fine…" Miho repeated this mantra in her head while working. It was now 12:30 at night. Her eyes becoming heavy, she turned off the light and did her bedtime routine. When she went to bed, however, she found herself wide awake.
She could feel her heart beating. Why was it beating so hard? She stood up to get a glass of water. While taking a sip, she felt as there was a lump in her throat. She tried to clear it however she felt it was still there.
"I'm getting sick. I'll see the nurse tomorrow. No need to see the doctor. It's not that serious. She'll know what to do. She'll know…"
Eventually though, she was able to drift off to sleep. The tiredness of the day caught up with her.
Rirko's Home – Oorai School Carrier – Night
Rirko was up late. All the questionnaires received, he began the arduous task of compiling the results. The headmistress wanted a report on her desk by tomorrow evening.
"This lady's a slave driver. Wanting a report by the end of tomorrow. Doesn't she know this stuff takes time?"
He decided to start with the Sensha-do team. Since the school has taken an interest with Sensha-do and the headmistress did say that they would invest their energies in it, Rirko thought it best to do them first. Just to get them out of the way.
He was finishing up Hippo Team before he found himself on Anglerfish. And Miho.
"Miho, my dear Miho. Let's see what you got down here."
After a few minutes looking over the answers, Rirko dropped her questionnaire on his desk. He had a look of disbelief in his eyes. He took it and looked at it again.
And again.
And again.
It just didn't make any sense. According to her answers, Miho had shown no other interests than in Sensha-do. Her answers were Sensha-do related. There were high levels discrepancies between her answers and that of a regular high school student.
"Two interests. Answers only relating to Sensha-do. And how she feels."
This was the most damning evidence of all. The multiple choice contained questions relating to "how do you feel about yourself." On average, most high schoolers would rank themselves between 7 and 9. 10 being the highest. But Miho…
"A two. A three. Her self-esteem is rock bottom. What the hell?!" Rirko took a moment to process the information. Then, setting the papers aside, he went on his computer and did a search.
"Miho Nishizumi. Sensha-do. Tankery."
Most of the search results were about last year's nationals. How Miho could take a no-name school and turn it into a powerhouse. But this information was known already. Rirko was looking for something different.
"Let's try something a bit more specific." Refining the search, he then found what he was looking for. One of the news articles from the west: "Kuromorimine student saves six tank members during the final match. Wait, she saved lives?"
Reading the article, it gave an in-depth description of the match between Kuromorimine and Pravda two years ago. The match was close, however.
"The match ended because of Kuromorimine's flag tank getting shot. The tank commander for that was…Miho? Miho?!"
Then it all clicked. Miho abandoned the flag tank to save the lives of her tank mates. By choosing to save her tank mates, she had lost the match.
"She should get a medal. A commendation. What did the school do about this?" Rirko searched for more information however it didn't show much. "Either the school didn't do anything or they decided to keep something a secret but what?"
Accessing the school roster system, Rirko searched for Miho's name. "She transferred from Kuromorimine two months after the end of that match. Why? What the hell happened that she would transfer?"
Now the mystery was taking a turn. Taking a sip of water, Rirko sat and complicated on his next move.
"So, a girl saves the lives of her tank mates. Two months later she leaves one of the most prestigious schools of Sensha-do to move to a no-name school. Why?"
He knew that this would be a touchy subject but to find the truth, he would have to do a lot of digging. He knew what he was doing tomorrow. He had to speak to the Student Council about this…and possibly even Miho herself.
A/N: Next chapter will be a dozy. Please let me know how this chapter went. Thanks.
A/N: Before starting on this chapter, I want to make a few things clear.
A lot of problems with Girl und Panzer fanfiction is that there are some stories that go really, really technical when it comes to strategies, weaponry and the like. They go in-depth and it usually takes about two/three chapters to cover an entire match.
I'm not that type of writer. Basically, I write about what happens before and after the match and then the key points that happened during. I will NOT, repeat will NOT be going in-depth on guns, strategies and conversations. I have a lot to write and I want to primary focus on the characters. If the information is important to the plot, then I'll add it in. So sorry if this irks some people but that's how I roll.
Your support on this is greatly appreciated. Next chapter is a long one so let's see how this one goes.
Oorai Girl's Academy – Tank Training Grounds - Afternoon
"Fire!"
The sound of the StugG III's assault gun echoed throughout the tank training grounds. Type 89 had no chance to retaliate for as soon as the shell connected, the white flag popped right out.
Meanwhile, Miho and Ami were surveying the grounds from the control tower. "That's enough! All tanks have been rendered inoperable. The winner is Hippo team!"
Miho thought it would be best to run a mock battle to get the team back into the swing of things. However, instead of tank teams, it would be a free-for-all with the last team standing. This day, it was Hippo team who stood out on top. Further, she personally did not participate in the battle. She wanted to see how Anglerfish would do without her leadership and guidance. They were knocked out during the middle of the skirmish but all things considered, they did well. She noted that Yukari would make a good commander, even if her tactics were rough around the edges.
"Tank retrieval teams are being mobilized, everyone is to meet up back at the tank shed. Good battle!" Ami then turned to Miho. "Well, commander, what do you think?"
Miho pondered for a moment, then spoke. "I think we've gotten a bit overconfident over the summer."
"Oh?"
"Yeah. Most of the teams fell for each other's ambushes although most of them could adapt to the situation and use the confusion to their advantage. And then there's Rabbit."
During the battle, there was confusion between Mallard team and Rabbit team. Rabbit team suggested using Mallard as bait and lure out Hippo and Duck who formed an alliance before. Rabbit assured Mallard that they would take out the attackers before being hit. However, when Mallard used an open field to lay out the trap, Anteater and Leopon came out of nowhere and started to fire. Shocked by these recent developments, Aya became nervous and open fired on Mallard team, knocking them out, before engaging Anteater and Leopon. Sodoko was none too happy.
While Rabbit was engaging with Anteater and Leopon, Anglerfish outflanked Rabbit and shot, knocking them out. They, in turn, were knocked out by Hippo by a long-range shot. At this point, Anteater used the momentary confusion to attempt to knock out Leopon. However, Leopon had the same idea. Both shots each knocked each other out.
It was this time Duck team engaged with Turtle team who came north of them. The Panzer light tank was no match for the Type 89. When Turtle was taken out, Hippo used the opportunity to fire another long-ranged and knock Duck out.
"I'm pretty sure that Rabbit and Mallard were working together. Rabbit shooting Mallard must have been an accident. But I'm sure Sodoko will see it differently." And did she ever. When everyone was back at the sheds, Sodoko went straight over to Rabbit team. Rabbit team was expecting Mallard, demanding an explanation.
"What the hell, Azusa?!" Sodoko was livid. "Yuki told me you wouldn't shoot at us while handling Hippo and Duck!"
"That was my fault," Aya admitted. "When Anteater and Leopon came over the ridge, and shots began to run down, I mistook your tank for another team."
"Mis-took?! It's a frikkin Char B1, how could you mistake that for any other tank?!"
Ayumi joined the fray, "Leave Aya alone, she said she was sorry!"
"Well sorry isn't good enough. If we have another free-for-all match, we're going to go straight for you!" Moyoko and Nozomi backed up Sodoko.
"We said it was an accident!" Azusa shouted back as she defended Rabbit team. "Why are you so worked up over this!?"
While Mallard and Rabbit argued about what happened, Anteater and Leopon were at odds at the betrayal of one another.
"Why did you betray us?! What's your problem?" shouted Nekonya.
"You betrayed us first," Satoko yelled back.
"Yeah, you tried to shoot at us while we were distracted," added Suzuki.
Piyotan retaliated, "Always take an advantage of a situation. Video games taught us to expect betrayal, especially from temporary allies!"
"Besides, if someone is in the wrong, it's you guys!" Momoga added.
Hoshino raised her voice, "Are you kidding me? That's not sportsmanship, that's just plain cheap! You got no guts, you got nothing!"
Anteater was in a state of unbelief, "HUH?"
The tensions were high as the four teams argued with one another. Who did what, what you didn't do, how could you do this, etc. Anglerfish, Hippo and Turtle were outside the entire thing. Momo tried to forcefully calm everyone down with her loud, stern voice but even with that, the arguments were only drowning out her voice.
"I can't do it, president," Momo resigned herself. "They're all too loud!"
Yuzu frowned and sighed, "this is very unbecoming. They're all supposed to be teammates."
Oryo, the bespectacled girl, noted, "This reminds me of the Sengoku period all over again."
"Or the cold war between Russia and the US," added Erwin.
"Or the start of WWI, when Archduke Ferdinand was killed," added Caesar.
"THAT'S IT," the other members of Hippo team yelled.
"Geez, when is Miho gonna get here?" asked Mako. It was apparent that she was getting annoyed by all the arguing. "All of this talk is making me mad."
Hana closed her eyes and sighed, "Well, Momo tried to calm everyone down, but all she did was add fuel to the fire."
"It's gonna be hard for Miporin to have everyone calm down," Saori said concerningly.
"If anyone can calm down a bunch of girls, it would be Miss Nishizumi," Yukari said confidently.
"BWEEEEEEEP!" Everyone stopped talking to find the course of the sound. It was Miss Chono with a whistle. She turned to Miho.
"Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later."
Miho agreed, "Yes. It was bound to happen."
"Wha-cha talking about?" Anzu asked.
Miho made her way to the front of the teams. "No team is perfect. There will be days when the cohesion of the teams will be tested. Despite everything we've been through, in the heat of battle, all rational thought is tossed out and we do actions that can cost us. That's why I said it was important to get to know the other teams, outside of Sensha-Do practice. So, we understand one another and more importantly…why we do the actions that we do."
Miho turned to Mallard team first, "Sodoko, I get that you're sore about getting shot at by Rabbit team. But what would you have done in their shoes? If you see an enemy coming towards you, do you wait or shoot?"
Sodoko was lost over this thought. "I…uh."
She then turned to Anteater, "Nekonya, remember that we are a team. What are the chances of us turning on you and Anteater?"
Nekonya was red-faced, "yeah, I forgot that this is real-life and not a video game. I'm sorry, I just had bad experiences in alliances that broke up and attacked us."
Miho raised her voice, not in anger, but in passion. "And this goes for everyone here! Remember, we are a team! We lose together, we win together, we got each other's back! Think about what it means for you and your team if things like this keep happening!"
The teams whispered in agreement.
"She's correct," Ami added. "Teamwork is important, especially when you have an exhibition match with Glorianna coming up."
Everyone was surprised by the news. "We're going up against Glorianna?" Yukari asked. "When?"
"Two weeks from now," Yuzu answered. "Ever since the nationals, they wanted a rematch, just like every other school. It couldn't be an official tournament match but they would settle with an exhibition."
Now the mood has completely changed. Once discord reigned, was now back to the team that can work together. Ami gave a grin, "Miho, wrap this up. I have a meeting with another representative from the federation. Good luck, commander!"
The sheds rang aloud with "bye sensei." The teams then turned to Miho.
"Uh, yes! I want team commanders to think about strategies that we can use against Glorianna. Most possible, they may have been able to upgrade their fleet so think about creative ways to win! Remember also to take into account calculated risks! I don't want any of the girls in unnecessary danger."
"Do we need reconnaissance for the match?" Yukari asked, with a sparkle in her eye. Miho shuttered.
"We'll cross that bridge when we get there."
"Okkkkkaaay."
"Remember to spend time off the field with one another! I expect you all to learn something from each other in one week's time!"
"HAI!"
"Practice is over for today," Momo concluded.
Came the response, "Good work everyone!"
"Listen, I'm sorry about what happened." Sodoko and the rest of Mallard team bowed.
"It's okay, I accept your apology," Azusa sighed. "But more importantly, we can take this opportunity to learn from our mistakes and move on."
Aya had the look like a puppy was caught doing something it wasn't supposed to do. "Yeah, I'm sorry too. I really got scared and shot without thinking. How can we make it up to you?"
Ayumi pondered, "Wait, I got it. Why don't we invite Mallard team to our weekly movie night! We can watch Full Metal Jacket!"
"You wanna watch that movie again?" Karina moaned. "That's the third time this year!"
"Well, I'm sure they haven't seen it!"
"Well…um…" Sodoko was going to turn down the invitation but then remembered what Miho had said about spending time together.
Sodoko gave a bow. "Thank you very much, we accept your invitation." Moyoko and Nozomi didn't get what was happening but they followed their leader's lead.
"You were betrayed by your teammates?" Satoko asked.
"Yeah, Nekonya hasn't still gotten over it," Momoga replied. "Nekonya let it go! That was a month ago!"
Nekonya started to get worked up, "But we spent two weeks planning that raid! And then in the middle of it, they wipe us out and took our stuff!"
Tsuchiya scratched her head. "Geez, I'm sorry. That's a sad way to go."
"I know, right!"
Satoko put her arm around Nekonya. "Listen, we're having a volleyball practice after Sensha-do practice tomorrow. Why don't you join us, take off some steam?"
Nekonya turned to her teammates, and then to Leopon. "Can I hit the ball as hard as I can?" Satoko gave a huge grin.
"Only if the ball is pointed downwards!"
"Finally, glad that's over," Saori said as she stretched herself. "Alright right, how about some dinner?!"
Mako smacked her lips. "YESSSS!"
"Where should we go?" asked Hana.
"How about with us!?" Anglerfish turned around to see Hippo and Yukari.
"Hippo is inviting us to their favorite sushi place!" Yukari was enthusiastic. "Plus, Miss Nishizumi, this will be a good time to get to know Hippo team!"
Miho gave a smile, "Yes, I suppose it would. Turtle team, would you like to join us?"
"Thanks for the offer," Anzu replied with a smile, "but we got Student Council stuff to take care of. Just enjoy the food doubly for us."
Yuzu nodded, "see you girls later!" As the three members of Turtle Team moved off, all the other teams dispersed.
Sushi Center – Oorai Carrier Ship - Evening
The place was packed for a weekday evening. They wouldn't have gotten a spot if Saemonza hadn't gotten a hookup from one of the managers there. They got a four-seat stall in the private area of the restaurant. The group took in the atmosphere. The restaurant screamed ancient Japan with old samurai suits, koi fish statues and a flowing waterfall display in the middle.
Yukari was impressed, "Hippo, you really know how to show your guests a good time!"
"Thank my friend Ayane," Saemonza said with a grin. "She said she owed me one after I helped her get a job here."
Hana asked, "What did you do?"
"I had her borrow one of my swords. The owner was so ecstatic seeing a genuine samurai sword that she hired her on the spot!"
The girls were amazed at the story. It was the first time the history buff's love of ancient arts proved useful.
For 3,000 yen each, it was all-you-can-eat. It was expensive, but the food quality was second to none. While eating, they spoke about history (of course), the Sengoku period specifically. After a while, the girls talked about the Sensha-do federation and what would happen if it was realistic. There was a debate about whether the sport could be viable. Miho was outspoken in a dislike of a realistic Sensha-do. She finished speaking for the other girls to participate.
As the roundtable continued, Miho overheard a family right behind their stall. It sounded like a man, woman, and their young daughter.
"So, what did you do today?" asked the man. Miho could only hear muffles.
"Honey, don't eat with your mouth full." The woman doted on the child.
"Mommy was there for career day!"
"Was she now!? Was everyone excited?"
"Yeah. Everyone said how it must be cool to be a chef!"
"Of course, it's really nice to work with food and try new things each day."
The daughter then asked a question. "Mommy, is it okay that I don't become a chef? I mean, I like drawing a lot and I…"
"Honey." The mother said in a soft tone. "You can be whoever you want to be and I'll still love you."
"You mean it?!"
The man agreed. "Of course. You're very young but if you set your mind to it, you can be whoever you want to be someday."
"Thank you! Thank you, thank you!"
The family conversation hit home for Miho. As the conversations swirled around her, she reflected on her own relationship with her mother.
The two Nishizumi daughters and their mother. This was a time when both were very young. They were being introduced to the Nishizumi style.
"Always advance. Don't retreat. To retreat is to lose and to lose is to forfeit your life."
"Isn't Sensha-do a sport, mother?" Miho innocently asked. "People don't die, do they? It isn't warring?"
"They should die for the shame they bring to themselves and their family upon losing. Listen, my daughters. Sensha-do is a time-honored tradition for the Nishizumi family. Sooner or later, you too will inherit the style and continue the legacy of our family."
"But what about the people you play with?"
"You do NOT play Sensha-do! You compete to win. For winning is all that matters in Sensha-do. Crush your enemies so they never again rise against you. Do this and you will survive. Do you girls understand." The girls looked at one another only for a moment.
Maho gave the reply. "Yes, mother…"
"Yes…mother…"
"Miporin? Miporin?"
"Huh?" Miho spaced out again. Saori was calling her for the last minute or so.
"Miporin, are you alright? You weren't answering me."
"Oh, yes. I was thinking about tank stuff."
"Alright. Well, Erwin suggested we list of interests so we have something to share with everyone. So, what're your interests besides Sensha-do?"
"Interests? Uh…" Miho had to think about this question. It was like that during the questionnaire. "My interests…interests…well, I like reading books and collecting Boko dolls!"
"Sweet, what else?" Now everyone wanted to know what Miho would say.
"Um…uh…" Hana noticed Miho was struggling. "We can get back to Miho later. I'm interested in flower arrangements."
"No duh," Mako replied.
"Mako, apologize. That was not nice."
"Uhhhh…." Everyone laughed at the exchange. Although Miho looked like she was having a good time, it was only a mask. Underneath that mask was a face of pain and sadness. The very fact that her mother introduced her to Sensha-do in such a way, she believed, was not right. So why did she endure it for all those years?
Miho's Apartment - Night
That night, Miho stayed up late. She was making future strategies for Oorai's match with Glorianna. She knew it was a weeknight. She knew she had to get up early tomorrow. But she stayed up late. The strategies were just a distraction to keep her mind off her troubles.
"I'm fine…I'm fine…I'm fine…" Miho repeated this mantra in her head while working. It was now 12:30 at night. Her eyes becoming heavy, she turned off the light and did her bedtime routine. When she went to bed, however, she found herself wide awake.
She could feel her heart beating. Why was it beating so hard? She stood up to get a glass of water. While taking a sip, she felt as there was a lump in her throat. She tried to clear it however she felt it was still there.
"I'm getting sick. I'll see the nurse tomorrow. No need to see the doctor. It's not that serious. She'll know what to do. She'll know…"
Eventually though, she was able to drift off to sleep. The tiredness of the day caught up with her.
Rirko's Home – Oorai School Carrier – Night
Rirko was up late. All the questionnaires received, he began the arduous task of compiling the results. The headmistress wanted a report on her desk by tomorrow evening.
"This lady's a slave driver. Wanting a report by the end of tomorrow. Doesn't she know this stuff takes time?"
He decided to start with the Sensha-do team. Since the school has taken an interest with Sensha-do and the headmistress did say that they would invest their energies in it, Rirko thought it best to do them first. Just to get them out of the way.
He was finishing up Hippo Team before he found himself on Anglerfish. And Miho.
"Miho, my dear Miho. Let's see what you got down here."
After a few minutes looking over the answers, Rirko dropped her questionnaire on his desk. He had a look of disbelief in his eyes. He took it and looked at it again.
And again.
And again.
It just didn't make any sense. According to her answers, Miho had shown no other interests than in Sensha-do. Her answers were Sensha-do related. There were high levels discrepancies between her answers and that of a regular high school student.
"Two interests. Answers only relating to Sensha-do. And how she feels."
This was the most damning evidence of all. The multiple choice contained questions relating to "how do you feel about yourself." On average, most high schoolers would rank themselves between 7 and 9. 10 being the highest. But Miho…
"A two. A three. Her self-esteem is rock bottom. What the hell?!" Rirko took a moment to process the information. Then, setting the papers aside, he went on his computer and did a search.
"Miho Nishizumi. Sensha-do. Tankery."
Most of the search results were about last year's nationals. How Miho could take a no-name school and turn it into a powerhouse. But this information was known already. Rirko was looking for something different.
"Let's try something a bit more specific." Refining the search, he then found what he was looking for. One of the news articles from the west: "Kuromorimine student saves six tank members during the final match. Wait, she saved lives?"
Reading the article, it gave an in-depth description of the match between Kuromorimine and Pravda two years ago. The match was close, however.
"The match ended because of Kuromorimine's flag tank getting shot. The tank commander for that was…Miho? Miho?!"
Then it all clicked. Miho abandoned the flag tank to save the lives of her tank mates. By choosing to save her tank mates, she had lost the match.
"She should get a medal. A commendation. What did the school do about this?" Rirko searched for more information however it didn't show much. "Either the school didn't do anything or they decided to keep something a secret but what?"
Accessing the school roster system, Rirko searched for Miho's name. "She transferred from Kuromorimine two months after the end of that match. Why? What the hell happened that she would transfer?"
Now the mystery was taking a turn. Taking a sip of water, Rirko sat and complicated on his next move.
"So, a girl saves the lives of her tank mates. Two months later she leaves one of the most prestigious schools of Sensha-do to move to a no-name school. Why?"
He knew that this would be a touchy subject but to find the truth, he would have to do a lot of digging. He knew what he was doing tomorrow. He had to speak to the Student Council about this…and possibly even Miho herself.
A/N: Next chapter will be a dozy. Please let me know how this chapter went. Thanks.
Heartache by the Number (Part I)
DawnofWar32
War is coming. Prepare yourselves!
- Location
- Butuan City, The Philippines
Uploader's Note: Hoo boy... This chapter is going to be divided into two parts, as this is a very long chapter. Here's the first part.
I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: This chapter will be introducing some new characters. Further, if there are any inconsistencies, please let me know. Thank you all so much for your love and support.
Update: Thanks to Goodalwayswins98 for letting me know about some inconsistencies. A few things of note:
- The information that this fan fiction is based on is solely on the anime. I recognize that there are some substantial differences between the two. (How Erika was in the same tank that Miho saved.) I haven't read much of the manga expect some points here and there so I hope this isn't a problem.
- It wasn't mentioned whether or not Shiho Nizhizumi was headmaster of Kuromorimine. She was, however, the coach and the chairperson of the Sensha-do federation. For all intent purposes, her being headmistress is what you call "head-canon"
Please feel free to review or PM me for any ideas or thoughts. Thanks!
Oorai Girl's Academy – Infirmary - Morning
"I'm sorry Miho, there's nothing wrong." In the school's infirmary, Miho went to the nurse early, before school started. She avoided walking with her friends for fear they would find out about what had been happening to her.
Unsatisfied with the results, Miho pressed for another evaluation. "Are you sure? There isn't anything wrong?"
The nurse folded her arms. "Yes. Your blood pressure is fine, your throat's all clear; your glands are not swollen. Any physical ailments you describe are not present now."
Seeing Miho's worried face, the nurse tried to be helpful. "However, it said that these symptoms could be attributed more to a mental health issue than an actual physical problem."
"What? What do you mean by mental health?"
"I'm not good with the specifics but I've learned that sometimes the body reacts to fight or flight situations. Shortness of breath, increased heart rate, hypervigilance, only to name a few. The body reacts to an incoming threat."
Miho was confused. Fight or flight? Hypervigilance? They were words that she never heard before. Reacting to an incoming threat? Was she in danger? Was that what her body was telling her? Looking for answers, she instead found more questions. So, was it a physical problem? Like a virus or a bacterial infection? Or was it a mental problem?
"I encourage you to see one of the ship's many doctors. They can do more for you than we can here. Further, if it is a mental issue, then they can refer you to the appropriate health care specialist."
There was that term, mental health. The more Miho thought about it, the more she denied it could be a mental issue.
"I'm not crazy," Miho stated. "I felt these things the last few days. They really happened!"
"And I'm not denying that they did. However, right now, there are no physical indications of these symptoms. I can't exactly provide you something you may or may not have."
Seeing this conversation not going anywhere, Miho relented. "All right. Thank you for your help though. I'm sorry for snapping at you. I'm just…"
"Tired? Well, you are the captain of the Sensha-do team. It must be a trying job. If anything, I suggest you get plenty of rest and relax. Go somewhere to be alone with your thoughts. Worse comes to worse, buy something that's over-the-counter and see if that helps. If not, then the doctor's office will be your next stop."
As Miho exited the nurse's office, her thoughts about what had happened the last few days surfaced. "First I have them and now I don't. Will they reappear again tonight?" By this thought, she could swear that her chest began to tighten.
Oorai Girl's Academy – Student Council's Office - Morning
Rirko shuffled some papers before heading up to the Student Council room. Last night's discovery made him concerned about whether there was an issue with Miho. He understood that as a team's commander she played an integral part in their competition. However, this fact was outweighed by an obligation to stop any harmful actions towards this one student. The need of the few was what he was concerned about.
As he made his way to the Student Council room, he stopped in front of the door. "Just another day," Rirko thought. "I'm just asking some questions and that's it." He knocked on the door and excused himself through.
"Good morning, Mr. Counselor!" Anzu said with a smile.
"That's Mr. Nagasawa," Momo corrected.
"But Mr. Counselor speaks about his job! He must like this job so that is what he shall be called. So, Mr. Counselor, what brings you here?"
Anzu, Momo, and Yuzu were at the big desk, with a couple of papers scattered on. Ami was sitting on the couch, drinking some black coffee.
Ami offered some coffee. "It's always nice to have coffee in the morning. Would you like some?"
"I'm good. Thanks. At any rate, the reason why I'm here." The Council and Ami waited to see what Rirko had to say.
"I'm finishing compiling some of the results of the quiz that were done a few days ago. Looking over the files, I just have a few questions about your tank commander, Miho Nishizumi."
At once, the four ladies' faces grew pale. Even Anzu, who was normally cheerful, wore a serious-tone mask.
"Do you know the reason why she transferred two months after the match between Pravda and Kuromorimine? I've read that she saved six of her tank mates during that time. So how come, as a heroine, would she need to transfer?"
Anzu gave a shrug, "Beats me."
Rirko raised an eyebrow, "really?"
"Yeah, when we asked her about it, she said something about getting a 'change in place.' Her family wanted to experience more things outside of Kuromorimine so they transferred over here."
Being a counselor, Rirko knew when someone was lying to him. He could tell how Anzu was fidgeting with her fingers, Yuzu with a look of concern. Momo was twitching around. They were all hiding something. Ami was perfectly still, watching these events unfold.
"Look," Rirko said in a stern voice, "I don't know what's going on. That's why I'm here. I am here to understand the history of Miho Nishizumi. There's a lot of things I would like to confirm however judging by your non-verbal behaviors, your actions are leading to believe that you are all hiding something."
Anzu gave a barely, non-auditable sigh.
"So, we can do this two ways. One, I find out on my own what happened, and I will eventually. I'll have choice words for all of you. Or two, you can tell me straight up what the truth is and I'll move accordingly."
"You're prying into private matters," Momo said menacingly. "I don't think Miss Nishizumi would appreciate you digging up her past."
"I think it would be best if we dropped it," Yuzu suggested. "I mean, Nishizumi isn't in any danger, is she?"
Rirko gave a wide glare. When someone disregards the emotional state of a person and believes that everything is alright. It was a pet peeve that he had for the longest time. Now, something in him broke.
"Actually, she is in a state of danger. We have a potential for someone entering a psychotic break. Unresolved feelings can eat a person from the inside, out over time. It's just like shaking a pop can. You can shake and shake until you end up with a sticky mess when opened. Miho may look like she's okay, but I've seen her behavior. Her quiz is an indication that something is wrong emotionally and mentally. And I'm telling you, as a professional, if we don't address it soon, your friend's mental state will be broken and all of you on the Sensha-do team will be S.O.L!"
The Student Council were silent. They've never considered Miho's feelings. They just dumped the expectations of winning and leading onto her, never thinking about how she would feel. They didn't know what to say. All three of them looked extremely guilty. The thought of winning another national was what came to mind at the time and nothing else.
Rirko turned to Yuzu. "I told you, if you got in my way, you're going to have a bad time."
Momo was defensive again. "Regardless of your concerns, we are under no obligation to tell you anything. This is a private matter. If you wish to know her past, I suggest speaking to her."
"That was my next step. If the Council is not forthcoming, then I'll go straight to the source."
"You do that."
"You wanna know what happened? Then I'll tell you." Rirko and the others turned to see Miss Chono who put her cup down on the coffee table.
Momo's mouth was agape, "Miss Chono, if we tell him then we'll…"
"If we don't tell him then we really don't care about Miho, do we?" Ami snapped back. "Is this what we care about? Only winning? Didn't you hear Miho? Have fun, work together, have each other's back!"
After a moment, Anzu who had gone the longest time in being quiet spoke. "Alright, Miss Chono. You can tell him. Regardless of what happens to the team. Miho's our friend. If she needs our help, then we will help her; just as she helped us."
Ami turned to Rirko. "Pull up a chair. It's going to be a long and ugly story."
Rirko sighed and grabbed a seat. He was happy he was going to find out the truth. But when Ami put it that way, he knew that something messed up went down with Miho.
Regardless, he clasped his hands together. "I want to hear it."
Oorai Girl's Academy – Training Grounds - Afternoon
Because of the free-for-all match, the teams tried to get to know each other off the Sensha-do field. Mallard and Rabbit as well as Duck and Anteater. In addition, six new recruits were watching the practice at the control tower with Ami. They were deciding whether or not Sensha-do was the right choice for them.
As per Miho's instructions, the tank commanders gave her a couple of strategies that they could use in their match against Glorianna. Some of them were hit and run tactics while others relied on a more advanced tactical skill such as pincer attacks and raids. As Miho, in the Panzer IV, observed the practice she noticed that Anglerfish team was unusually quiet.
Miho commanded the tank to halt under a row of trees. "Ok girls, what's going on?"
Saori looked back at Miho, "What do you mean, Miporin?"
"I mean everyone here is quiet. Seriously, is there something I need to know?"
Anglerfish looked at each other for a moment. They all turned to Miho and at once she understood. She groaned, "is it about me?"
"You've been acting strange, as of late," Hana started. "You showed up at school very early today."
"That's because of Sensha-do practice. I wanted to show up early to plan for the afternoon."
"But you've never done that before," Yukari stated.
"Do I have to tell you girls everything that I do?" Miho was becoming defensive. She didn't know it but her voice was rising. "I keep telling you all, everything is fine. If I need help, I'll let you know."
"Still not good enough," Mako said in her monotone voice.
"What do you mean, not good enough?"
"What I mean is that you've never come to us for help. We're two weeks into practice and we're still waiting for work."
"That was on my to-do list."
Saori shifted her seat a little. "Are you doing the work by yourself?"
"Of course not. I want things to be set before I'm able to give out the work."
"And you have also been yawning a lot. Have you been getting enough sleep?"
Miho knew that her friends were only concerned about her well-being. But she didn't want to unnecessarily burden them with her issues.
She gave a sigh and relented. "What will it take for you girls to be at ease? We can't exactly work together when all of you keep worrying about me. I appreciate the gesture but…"
Everyone was quiet for a moment.
Saori was the one to break the silence. "Sleepover."
"Sleepover?"
"Sleepover. Tonight. We'll grab our stuff."
"Sleepover." Miho never had a sleepover before. She wasn't sure if they could fit everyone in her little apartment. But she would do whatever it took to help the girls relax.
After bringing the tanks in, Ami was accompanied by the six new recruits. Miho had them line up to meet the team. At first, the teams didn't know who these girls were. It was when Miho announced them as new recruits that she also made the announcement about the new tanks. The reaction was you would expect: girls excitedly running around hugging each other, and Yukari having a panzer meltdown. When everyone calmed down, Miho introduced the new recruits' proper.
She had a smile on her face. "Everyone, we have some new faces joining us starting tomorrow!"
The field was full of cheers and applause.
"I'll be introducing them one-by-one. First up: Kii Horie!"
From the end of the left side, a girl with large beige eyes stepped forward. Her silky, curly, amber hair was worn reminiscent of a halo.
"Next, Emika Sugihara!"
Appearing to have a playful personality, her orange eyes glowed like two members. Her black, wavy hair swung back and forth as she bobbed her head around.
"Ichiho Nii"
The girl with white hair appeared shy. She ran her fingers down her hair, looking nervously.
"Risa Haruyama!"
Risa was tall, with a set of blue eyes. She wore a scarf, reminding all a luxurious style.
"Yumisa Izumi!"
Her smile was warm. Her straight, long, blonde hair reflected the sun, light make-up and looked like a movie star.
"And finally, Maki Uozumi!"
Maki had slanted blue eyes that shone like an afternoon sky. Her thick, curly, purple hair at neck length was her most defining feature.
After introducing the recruits, Miho continued with her debriefing. "These girls will be piloting the newly acquired Char B1 and Hetzer. Therefore, they will be mentored by Mallard and Turtle team respectively…or at least until they get the hang of it.
Momo facepalmed, "we have to babysit freshmen now?"
"Don't sweat it," Anzu said with a smile. ." It'll be only during practice hours. I think."
Yuzu tried to make good on a situation. "Still, it'll be good to teach new Sensha-do practitioners about our style."
"When did we get this duty? Why were we not informed?" asked Sodoko.
Moyoko tried to be optimistic. "Well, at least we'll get to teach the newbies how to drive a tank."
Nozomi, ever the pessimist, replied, "yeah, but will they listen?"
"They will listen or they will be crushed!" yelled Sodoko.
"Right!"
With the introductions concluded, so was the practice. "Tank commanders, thank you for your strategies and suggestions. I'll be looking at them tonight and we'll meet up sometime later in the week to finalize everything. Monday, we'll be checking with everyone to see how everyone is with each other. Until then…"
"Practice is over for today!" Momo announced.
"Good work, everyone!"
Oorai Girl's Academy – Rirko's Office – Afternoon
"And that's when I get really, really nervous."
"Hmm…"
Rirko was in his office, listening to one of the freshmen students. Her teacher sent her down to him because she noticed her acting nervously at everything.
"And how long has this been happening?"
"Well, ever since school started."
"Okay…so ever since the beginning of the school year, she has been nervous. Did you happen to attend the open house that happened in the summer?"
The girl stared at him. "Uhh…"
"Were you aware that the school has orientation days for freshmen before the start of school?"
The girl looked down. "Well…I didn't go to those."
Rirko squinted his eyes. "Didn't go?"
"Well, I thought it was a waste of time. It wasn't really required or anything. It was only for extra information."
Rirko gave a sigh. "These orientation days are used to introduce freshmen to the school grounds, the faculty and getting to know other freshmen. It's kinda an important thing."
"I'm getting that vibe," the girl admitted. "But at the time, I was doing some really, really, important stuff!"
"Like?"
"I was going on vacation to visit my cousin in the US. Also, we had heard that the school was going to be shut down so my parents were looking for another place for me to go. But then, it reopened and I was able to come here after all." As she was saying this, she had a smile on her face.
He may have had a poker face on the outside but inside Rirko was inwardly face-palming. Okay…breathe. Find your center. She is only a kid. "So, now that we know the why, what now?"
"What…now?"
"How can you not be nervous at things?"
The girl thought for a moment. "Maybe, join a club or something. Or maybe talk to some other freshmen?"
"I heard that there's a group that meets every Friday that is entirely made of freshmen. There are only two seniors in that group."
"So, it's a support group."
"Yeah…and today's a Friday."
It took a minute to register but then the girl understood. "So…I should totally go to that support group?"
"Second floor, class B1-C. Down the stairs, it should be right in the middle."
The girl got up, grabbed her stuff and headed out the door. "Thank you, Mr. Nagasawa."
Rirko gave a wile smile. "Why did I do? You're the one who thought about all those options. I just pointed you in the right direction."
"If I feel nervous or whatever, is it cool to see you again?"
"That's what I'm here for."
As the girl left, Rirko could not help but think about the situation that happened this morning.
Oorai Girl's Academy – Student Council's Office – This Morning
"THERE'S JUST NO WAY?! ARE YOU SERIOUS?!"
The student council and Ami stared at Rirko's sudden outburst. For the first time since meeting him, Yuzu felt nervous and frightened by this behavior.
"Calm down, Mr. Nagasawa," Ami sternly took him. "Your behavior is not professional."
Realizing his mistake, Rirko took a deep breath and sat down. He then began to process what was said to him.
After the match between Pravda and Kuromorimine, Miho wasn't hailed as a heroine. She wasn't even commended. She, with the rest of the tank mates she saved, was shunned. Oppressed. They were considered failures and because of their actions, Kuromorimine lost their nine-year winning streak. Peer seclusion on a school-wide level. Although not well known as physical or emotional bullying, it was still bullying. They were essentially the black sheep. No one wanted to do anything with them. They were all failures, and Miho was the biggest failure of them all.
One by one, they transferred to other schools, not being able to handle the pressure of being shunned. In the end, only two of the remaining six stayed on the Sensha-do team.
But the most damning thing in all of this: The tank commander and the headmistress of Kuromorimine. They were Miho's mother and older sister respectively. Because of the Nishizumi doctrine and how she broke it, Miho was a disgrace. How could a Nishizumi give up a victory so easily? She was ridiculed and talked down upon by her mother. And the fact that her sister, the only person she had a real connection with, did nothing to protect her was absolutely disgusting.
"Sorry. I'm a child advocate back at home and when stories like this happen, I tend to…fly off the handle."
"Well, your customs are very different from ours," Ami said, as she took another sip of coffee. "We have a traditionalist way of doing things. From our culture, Shiho had every right to discipline her daughter. Especially if Miho went against the family teachings, no matter how morally wrong it was to sacrifice to obtain victory."
Rirko crossed his arms, "Well that's messed up?! And her mother's been doing that ever since she's been a young child?"
Ami nodded her head. Now Miho's questionnaire made sense. Imaging to be looked down upon by her mother, to be considered a disgrace, and compared to her successful older sister. Imaging she had to endure that suffering, day in and day out, for 8+ years.
Oh yeah, Miho didn't have to imagine.
"This is information that should have been told to me right away. I hope you had a good reason why you were keeping this from me."
Ami looked at Rirko. "Why do you ask questions you already know the answer to?"
That didn't make sense. He already knew the answer? Why did the Student Council go to great lengths to hide this fact from him?
Then, it dawned on him. "Oh hell no. You don't mean…"
The Sensha-do rule of being "emotionally compromised." As the champions of the nationals, Oorai needed all its talent to win again. That made Miho an integral part of the school's success. Without her; without their pillar of strength, they would be nothing.
Rirko had the authority to suspend Miho from Sensha-do.
Yuzu walked towards Rirko. "The reason Oorai is on the map now is that of Sensha-do. You saw how MEXT was dead set on shutting us down. For the sake of the students here, we need to keep the momentum going."
"Even if it means breaking someone?" Rirko stood up. "Remember, her self-esteem is pretty much demolished because of the crap that mommy's been saying. If you push her too far, well I don't need to spell it out to you, do I?"
"We don't have a choice," Momo countered. "Nishizumi is the only one capable enough to lead this team."
"Don't have a choice?! Train someone else!? Have her take an advisory role! To have her at command day in and day out, to be reminded of her greatest failure. And that's not messed up?!"
"You don't know anything about this school!" Momo snapped. Tears started to stream down her eyes and her words began to mix in with sobbing.
"All of us made sacrifices! All of us made mistakes and paid for it. And this, this one good thing that's happening for us, you want to take it away?! I won't let the school shut down because of this! I can't! I won't!" Yuzu held her friend and Momo buried her head on her shoulder. Anzu was quietly reflecting on what's happening.
Rirko then understood. The Student Council loved Oorai. They loved their students. And they would make the appropriate sacrifices to keep it moving. Even if it means, one girl's unhappiness.
"Remember how in the rules stated about suspending any person participating in Sensha-Do that is 'emotionally compromised.' How, under the authority of MEXT, I can do just that?"
Everyone in the room looked fearful. Momo closed her eyes; Yuzu and Anzu stared at him. Ami quietly watched.
Rirko turned around and headed towards the door. "This conversation never happened. I'm warning you right now. There's only so much a person can take before the pressure gets to them. If I feel that Miho needs to leave Sensha-do for the sake of her sanity, then I will do it. Until then, you had all better make contingencies when it does happen."
"I'll be keeping a closer eye on Miho from now on. When something bad does go down, I want to be there as a support. Your reward had better be worth the sacrifice."
The meeting ended with Student Council's victory. Miho would still be the team commander for Oorai. However, Rirko knew that she showed signs of breaking. She had been playing a very delicate game of who pleasing who over the years. But now her ego had started to surface and it wouldn't take the doormat routine anymore.
U/N: Second part incoming in a while. Please wait warmly.
I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: This chapter will be introducing some new characters. Further, if there are any inconsistencies, please let me know. Thank you all so much for your love and support.
Update: Thanks to Goodalwayswins98 for letting me know about some inconsistencies. A few things of note:
- The information that this fan fiction is based on is solely on the anime. I recognize that there are some substantial differences between the two. (How Erika was in the same tank that Miho saved.) I haven't read much of the manga expect some points here and there so I hope this isn't a problem.
- It wasn't mentioned whether or not Shiho Nizhizumi was headmaster of Kuromorimine. She was, however, the coach and the chairperson of the Sensha-do federation. For all intent purposes, her being headmistress is what you call "head-canon"
Please feel free to review or PM me for any ideas or thoughts. Thanks!
Oorai Girl's Academy – Infirmary - Morning
"I'm sorry Miho, there's nothing wrong." In the school's infirmary, Miho went to the nurse early, before school started. She avoided walking with her friends for fear they would find out about what had been happening to her.
Unsatisfied with the results, Miho pressed for another evaluation. "Are you sure? There isn't anything wrong?"
The nurse folded her arms. "Yes. Your blood pressure is fine, your throat's all clear; your glands are not swollen. Any physical ailments you describe are not present now."
Seeing Miho's worried face, the nurse tried to be helpful. "However, it said that these symptoms could be attributed more to a mental health issue than an actual physical problem."
"What? What do you mean by mental health?"
"I'm not good with the specifics but I've learned that sometimes the body reacts to fight or flight situations. Shortness of breath, increased heart rate, hypervigilance, only to name a few. The body reacts to an incoming threat."
Miho was confused. Fight or flight? Hypervigilance? They were words that she never heard before. Reacting to an incoming threat? Was she in danger? Was that what her body was telling her? Looking for answers, she instead found more questions. So, was it a physical problem? Like a virus or a bacterial infection? Or was it a mental problem?
"I encourage you to see one of the ship's many doctors. They can do more for you than we can here. Further, if it is a mental issue, then they can refer you to the appropriate health care specialist."
There was that term, mental health. The more Miho thought about it, the more she denied it could be a mental issue.
"I'm not crazy," Miho stated. "I felt these things the last few days. They really happened!"
"And I'm not denying that they did. However, right now, there are no physical indications of these symptoms. I can't exactly provide you something you may or may not have."
Seeing this conversation not going anywhere, Miho relented. "All right. Thank you for your help though. I'm sorry for snapping at you. I'm just…"
"Tired? Well, you are the captain of the Sensha-do team. It must be a trying job. If anything, I suggest you get plenty of rest and relax. Go somewhere to be alone with your thoughts. Worse comes to worse, buy something that's over-the-counter and see if that helps. If not, then the doctor's office will be your next stop."
As Miho exited the nurse's office, her thoughts about what had happened the last few days surfaced. "First I have them and now I don't. Will they reappear again tonight?" By this thought, she could swear that her chest began to tighten.
Oorai Girl's Academy – Student Council's Office - Morning
Rirko shuffled some papers before heading up to the Student Council room. Last night's discovery made him concerned about whether there was an issue with Miho. He understood that as a team's commander she played an integral part in their competition. However, this fact was outweighed by an obligation to stop any harmful actions towards this one student. The need of the few was what he was concerned about.
As he made his way to the Student Council room, he stopped in front of the door. "Just another day," Rirko thought. "I'm just asking some questions and that's it." He knocked on the door and excused himself through.
"Good morning, Mr. Counselor!" Anzu said with a smile.
"That's Mr. Nagasawa," Momo corrected.
"But Mr. Counselor speaks about his job! He must like this job so that is what he shall be called. So, Mr. Counselor, what brings you here?"
Anzu, Momo, and Yuzu were at the big desk, with a couple of papers scattered on. Ami was sitting on the couch, drinking some black coffee.
Ami offered some coffee. "It's always nice to have coffee in the morning. Would you like some?"
"I'm good. Thanks. At any rate, the reason why I'm here." The Council and Ami waited to see what Rirko had to say.
"I'm finishing compiling some of the results of the quiz that were done a few days ago. Looking over the files, I just have a few questions about your tank commander, Miho Nishizumi."
At once, the four ladies' faces grew pale. Even Anzu, who was normally cheerful, wore a serious-tone mask.
"Do you know the reason why she transferred two months after the match between Pravda and Kuromorimine? I've read that she saved six of her tank mates during that time. So how come, as a heroine, would she need to transfer?"
Anzu gave a shrug, "Beats me."
Rirko raised an eyebrow, "really?"
"Yeah, when we asked her about it, she said something about getting a 'change in place.' Her family wanted to experience more things outside of Kuromorimine so they transferred over here."
Being a counselor, Rirko knew when someone was lying to him. He could tell how Anzu was fidgeting with her fingers, Yuzu with a look of concern. Momo was twitching around. They were all hiding something. Ami was perfectly still, watching these events unfold.
"Look," Rirko said in a stern voice, "I don't know what's going on. That's why I'm here. I am here to understand the history of Miho Nishizumi. There's a lot of things I would like to confirm however judging by your non-verbal behaviors, your actions are leading to believe that you are all hiding something."
Anzu gave a barely, non-auditable sigh.
"So, we can do this two ways. One, I find out on my own what happened, and I will eventually. I'll have choice words for all of you. Or two, you can tell me straight up what the truth is and I'll move accordingly."
"You're prying into private matters," Momo said menacingly. "I don't think Miss Nishizumi would appreciate you digging up her past."
"I think it would be best if we dropped it," Yuzu suggested. "I mean, Nishizumi isn't in any danger, is she?"
Rirko gave a wide glare. When someone disregards the emotional state of a person and believes that everything is alright. It was a pet peeve that he had for the longest time. Now, something in him broke.
"Actually, she is in a state of danger. We have a potential for someone entering a psychotic break. Unresolved feelings can eat a person from the inside, out over time. It's just like shaking a pop can. You can shake and shake until you end up with a sticky mess when opened. Miho may look like she's okay, but I've seen her behavior. Her quiz is an indication that something is wrong emotionally and mentally. And I'm telling you, as a professional, if we don't address it soon, your friend's mental state will be broken and all of you on the Sensha-do team will be S.O.L!"
The Student Council were silent. They've never considered Miho's feelings. They just dumped the expectations of winning and leading onto her, never thinking about how she would feel. They didn't know what to say. All three of them looked extremely guilty. The thought of winning another national was what came to mind at the time and nothing else.
Rirko turned to Yuzu. "I told you, if you got in my way, you're going to have a bad time."
Momo was defensive again. "Regardless of your concerns, we are under no obligation to tell you anything. This is a private matter. If you wish to know her past, I suggest speaking to her."
"That was my next step. If the Council is not forthcoming, then I'll go straight to the source."
"You do that."
"You wanna know what happened? Then I'll tell you." Rirko and the others turned to see Miss Chono who put her cup down on the coffee table.
Momo's mouth was agape, "Miss Chono, if we tell him then we'll…"
"If we don't tell him then we really don't care about Miho, do we?" Ami snapped back. "Is this what we care about? Only winning? Didn't you hear Miho? Have fun, work together, have each other's back!"
After a moment, Anzu who had gone the longest time in being quiet spoke. "Alright, Miss Chono. You can tell him. Regardless of what happens to the team. Miho's our friend. If she needs our help, then we will help her; just as she helped us."
Ami turned to Rirko. "Pull up a chair. It's going to be a long and ugly story."
Rirko sighed and grabbed a seat. He was happy he was going to find out the truth. But when Ami put it that way, he knew that something messed up went down with Miho.
Regardless, he clasped his hands together. "I want to hear it."
Oorai Girl's Academy – Training Grounds - Afternoon
Because of the free-for-all match, the teams tried to get to know each other off the Sensha-do field. Mallard and Rabbit as well as Duck and Anteater. In addition, six new recruits were watching the practice at the control tower with Ami. They were deciding whether or not Sensha-do was the right choice for them.
As per Miho's instructions, the tank commanders gave her a couple of strategies that they could use in their match against Glorianna. Some of them were hit and run tactics while others relied on a more advanced tactical skill such as pincer attacks and raids. As Miho, in the Panzer IV, observed the practice she noticed that Anglerfish team was unusually quiet.
Miho commanded the tank to halt under a row of trees. "Ok girls, what's going on?"
Saori looked back at Miho, "What do you mean, Miporin?"
"I mean everyone here is quiet. Seriously, is there something I need to know?"
Anglerfish looked at each other for a moment. They all turned to Miho and at once she understood. She groaned, "is it about me?"
"You've been acting strange, as of late," Hana started. "You showed up at school very early today."
"That's because of Sensha-do practice. I wanted to show up early to plan for the afternoon."
"But you've never done that before," Yukari stated.
"Do I have to tell you girls everything that I do?" Miho was becoming defensive. She didn't know it but her voice was rising. "I keep telling you all, everything is fine. If I need help, I'll let you know."
"Still not good enough," Mako said in her monotone voice.
"What do you mean, not good enough?"
"What I mean is that you've never come to us for help. We're two weeks into practice and we're still waiting for work."
"That was on my to-do list."
Saori shifted her seat a little. "Are you doing the work by yourself?"
"Of course not. I want things to be set before I'm able to give out the work."
"And you have also been yawning a lot. Have you been getting enough sleep?"
Miho knew that her friends were only concerned about her well-being. But she didn't want to unnecessarily burden them with her issues.
She gave a sigh and relented. "What will it take for you girls to be at ease? We can't exactly work together when all of you keep worrying about me. I appreciate the gesture but…"
Everyone was quiet for a moment.
Saori was the one to break the silence. "Sleepover."
"Sleepover?"
"Sleepover. Tonight. We'll grab our stuff."
"Sleepover." Miho never had a sleepover before. She wasn't sure if they could fit everyone in her little apartment. But she would do whatever it took to help the girls relax.
After bringing the tanks in, Ami was accompanied by the six new recruits. Miho had them line up to meet the team. At first, the teams didn't know who these girls were. It was when Miho announced them as new recruits that she also made the announcement about the new tanks. The reaction was you would expect: girls excitedly running around hugging each other, and Yukari having a panzer meltdown. When everyone calmed down, Miho introduced the new recruits' proper.
She had a smile on her face. "Everyone, we have some new faces joining us starting tomorrow!"
The field was full of cheers and applause.
"I'll be introducing them one-by-one. First up: Kii Horie!"
From the end of the left side, a girl with large beige eyes stepped forward. Her silky, curly, amber hair was worn reminiscent of a halo.
"Next, Emika Sugihara!"
Appearing to have a playful personality, her orange eyes glowed like two members. Her black, wavy hair swung back and forth as she bobbed her head around.
"Ichiho Nii"
The girl with white hair appeared shy. She ran her fingers down her hair, looking nervously.
"Risa Haruyama!"
Risa was tall, with a set of blue eyes. She wore a scarf, reminding all a luxurious style.
"Yumisa Izumi!"
Her smile was warm. Her straight, long, blonde hair reflected the sun, light make-up and looked like a movie star.
"And finally, Maki Uozumi!"
Maki had slanted blue eyes that shone like an afternoon sky. Her thick, curly, purple hair at neck length was her most defining feature.
After introducing the recruits, Miho continued with her debriefing. "These girls will be piloting the newly acquired Char B1 and Hetzer. Therefore, they will be mentored by Mallard and Turtle team respectively…or at least until they get the hang of it.
Momo facepalmed, "we have to babysit freshmen now?"
"Don't sweat it," Anzu said with a smile. ." It'll be only during practice hours. I think."
Yuzu tried to make good on a situation. "Still, it'll be good to teach new Sensha-do practitioners about our style."
"When did we get this duty? Why were we not informed?" asked Sodoko.
Moyoko tried to be optimistic. "Well, at least we'll get to teach the newbies how to drive a tank."
Nozomi, ever the pessimist, replied, "yeah, but will they listen?"
"They will listen or they will be crushed!" yelled Sodoko.
"Right!"
With the introductions concluded, so was the practice. "Tank commanders, thank you for your strategies and suggestions. I'll be looking at them tonight and we'll meet up sometime later in the week to finalize everything. Monday, we'll be checking with everyone to see how everyone is with each other. Until then…"
"Practice is over for today!" Momo announced.
"Good work, everyone!"
Oorai Girl's Academy – Rirko's Office – Afternoon
"And that's when I get really, really nervous."
"Hmm…"
Rirko was in his office, listening to one of the freshmen students. Her teacher sent her down to him because she noticed her acting nervously at everything.
"And how long has this been happening?"
"Well, ever since school started."
"Okay…so ever since the beginning of the school year, she has been nervous. Did you happen to attend the open house that happened in the summer?"
The girl stared at him. "Uhh…"
"Were you aware that the school has orientation days for freshmen before the start of school?"
The girl looked down. "Well…I didn't go to those."
Rirko squinted his eyes. "Didn't go?"
"Well, I thought it was a waste of time. It wasn't really required or anything. It was only for extra information."
Rirko gave a sigh. "These orientation days are used to introduce freshmen to the school grounds, the faculty and getting to know other freshmen. It's kinda an important thing."
"I'm getting that vibe," the girl admitted. "But at the time, I was doing some really, really, important stuff!"
"Like?"
"I was going on vacation to visit my cousin in the US. Also, we had heard that the school was going to be shut down so my parents were looking for another place for me to go. But then, it reopened and I was able to come here after all." As she was saying this, she had a smile on her face.
He may have had a poker face on the outside but inside Rirko was inwardly face-palming. Okay…breathe. Find your center. She is only a kid. "So, now that we know the why, what now?"
"What…now?"
"How can you not be nervous at things?"
The girl thought for a moment. "Maybe, join a club or something. Or maybe talk to some other freshmen?"
"I heard that there's a group that meets every Friday that is entirely made of freshmen. There are only two seniors in that group."
"So, it's a support group."
"Yeah…and today's a Friday."
It took a minute to register but then the girl understood. "So…I should totally go to that support group?"
"Second floor, class B1-C. Down the stairs, it should be right in the middle."
The girl got up, grabbed her stuff and headed out the door. "Thank you, Mr. Nagasawa."
Rirko gave a wile smile. "Why did I do? You're the one who thought about all those options. I just pointed you in the right direction."
"If I feel nervous or whatever, is it cool to see you again?"
"That's what I'm here for."
As the girl left, Rirko could not help but think about the situation that happened this morning.
Oorai Girl's Academy – Student Council's Office – This Morning
"THERE'S JUST NO WAY?! ARE YOU SERIOUS?!"
The student council and Ami stared at Rirko's sudden outburst. For the first time since meeting him, Yuzu felt nervous and frightened by this behavior.
"Calm down, Mr. Nagasawa," Ami sternly took him. "Your behavior is not professional."
Realizing his mistake, Rirko took a deep breath and sat down. He then began to process what was said to him.
After the match between Pravda and Kuromorimine, Miho wasn't hailed as a heroine. She wasn't even commended. She, with the rest of the tank mates she saved, was shunned. Oppressed. They were considered failures and because of their actions, Kuromorimine lost their nine-year winning streak. Peer seclusion on a school-wide level. Although not well known as physical or emotional bullying, it was still bullying. They were essentially the black sheep. No one wanted to do anything with them. They were all failures, and Miho was the biggest failure of them all.
One by one, they transferred to other schools, not being able to handle the pressure of being shunned. In the end, only two of the remaining six stayed on the Sensha-do team.
But the most damning thing in all of this: The tank commander and the headmistress of Kuromorimine. They were Miho's mother and older sister respectively. Because of the Nishizumi doctrine and how she broke it, Miho was a disgrace. How could a Nishizumi give up a victory so easily? She was ridiculed and talked down upon by her mother. And the fact that her sister, the only person she had a real connection with, did nothing to protect her was absolutely disgusting.
"Sorry. I'm a child advocate back at home and when stories like this happen, I tend to…fly off the handle."
"Well, your customs are very different from ours," Ami said, as she took another sip of coffee. "We have a traditionalist way of doing things. From our culture, Shiho had every right to discipline her daughter. Especially if Miho went against the family teachings, no matter how morally wrong it was to sacrifice to obtain victory."
Rirko crossed his arms, "Well that's messed up?! And her mother's been doing that ever since she's been a young child?"
Ami nodded her head. Now Miho's questionnaire made sense. Imaging to be looked down upon by her mother, to be considered a disgrace, and compared to her successful older sister. Imaging she had to endure that suffering, day in and day out, for 8+ years.
Oh yeah, Miho didn't have to imagine.
"This is information that should have been told to me right away. I hope you had a good reason why you were keeping this from me."
Ami looked at Rirko. "Why do you ask questions you already know the answer to?"
That didn't make sense. He already knew the answer? Why did the Student Council go to great lengths to hide this fact from him?
Then, it dawned on him. "Oh hell no. You don't mean…"
The Sensha-do rule of being "emotionally compromised." As the champions of the nationals, Oorai needed all its talent to win again. That made Miho an integral part of the school's success. Without her; without their pillar of strength, they would be nothing.
Rirko had the authority to suspend Miho from Sensha-do.
Yuzu walked towards Rirko. "The reason Oorai is on the map now is that of Sensha-do. You saw how MEXT was dead set on shutting us down. For the sake of the students here, we need to keep the momentum going."
"Even if it means breaking someone?" Rirko stood up. "Remember, her self-esteem is pretty much demolished because of the crap that mommy's been saying. If you push her too far, well I don't need to spell it out to you, do I?"
"We don't have a choice," Momo countered. "Nishizumi is the only one capable enough to lead this team."
"Don't have a choice?! Train someone else!? Have her take an advisory role! To have her at command day in and day out, to be reminded of her greatest failure. And that's not messed up?!"
"You don't know anything about this school!" Momo snapped. Tears started to stream down her eyes and her words began to mix in with sobbing.
"All of us made sacrifices! All of us made mistakes and paid for it. And this, this one good thing that's happening for us, you want to take it away?! I won't let the school shut down because of this! I can't! I won't!" Yuzu held her friend and Momo buried her head on her shoulder. Anzu was quietly reflecting on what's happening.
Rirko then understood. The Student Council loved Oorai. They loved their students. And they would make the appropriate sacrifices to keep it moving. Even if it means, one girl's unhappiness.
"Remember how in the rules stated about suspending any person participating in Sensha-Do that is 'emotionally compromised.' How, under the authority of MEXT, I can do just that?"
Everyone in the room looked fearful. Momo closed her eyes; Yuzu and Anzu stared at him. Ami quietly watched.
Rirko turned around and headed towards the door. "This conversation never happened. I'm warning you right now. There's only so much a person can take before the pressure gets to them. If I feel that Miho needs to leave Sensha-do for the sake of her sanity, then I will do it. Until then, you had all better make contingencies when it does happen."
"I'll be keeping a closer eye on Miho from now on. When something bad does go down, I want to be there as a support. Your reward had better be worth the sacrifice."
The meeting ended with Student Council's victory. Miho would still be the team commander for Oorai. However, Rirko knew that she showed signs of breaking. She had been playing a very delicate game of who pleasing who over the years. But now her ego had started to surface and it wouldn't take the doormat routine anymore.
U/N: Second part incoming in a while. Please wait warmly.
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Heartache by the Number (Part II)
DawnofWar32
War is coming. Prepare yourselves!
- Location
- Butuan City, The Philippines
Uploader's Note: Here's the second part of the chapter. Thank you for waiting and please enjoy reading.
I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
Oorai Girl's Academy – Rirko's Office – Afternoon
There simply wasn't enough physical evidence to suggest Miho's emotional distress. Sure, he had the quiz, however he needed more proof that her well-being was at risk and it was related to Sensha-do.
Taking a sip of water, he continued, for the time being, compiling the rest of the school's quizzes. He had almost past the halfway point. By 5:00, he would be needing to send the report off to the headmistress and the rest of the faulty.
He was genuine when he said that the conversation this morning didn't happen. He felt sorry for the Student Council who were only trying to keep their school going. Regardless of there being no risk of being shut down again, the MEXT minister would surely look for other opportunities to shut down the school permanently. That's why the council was so vigilant in keeping with the momentum. It was to prevent him from getting that chance.
The momentary silence was broken by the door swinging wide open.
"Mr. Nagasawa, we need to talk!" a booming voice of a lady teacher came from the door. Her simple blue attire didn't mask the curly brunette with make-up. The moment she started to shoot her mouth, Rirko shuttered.
"Butts, it's Eiko." Eiko Haurmra, nicknamed by staff and students alike as the "wicked bitch of the east," was a hard-nosed woman who believed heavily in the teacher-oriented approach. Basically, it boiled down to "I'm the teacher, you're the student, so shut up and listen like good little girls." Understandably, this made her very unpopular with the students.
Rirko tried his best to avoid her at all costs however she was able to catch him in his office. There was no escape.
"Is there a problem, Miss Haurmra," Rirko sighed.
This was her second year of teaching yet she was trying to appear older. She stomped her foot, "Yes there is. My girls are not listening to me. They are all talkative, disruptive and noisy girls that make it seem that their only goal is to make me miserable!"
"Okkkaaay…. I have only one question for you Miss Haurmra." Rirko shifted his chair. "Are you coachable?"
"Excuse me?"
"Are you coachable?"
Eiko had a puzzled look on her face. "Coachable? What does that mean? Is that a western term?"
"It depends on where you look at it. In layman's terms, it means if someone suggests you do something a different way, you'll be open to doing it."
"You mean there's a different style of teaching?"
Once again, Rirko's poker face and inward face-palm were apparent. How the hell did you become a teacher without learning-teaching styles? We're you not paying attention that class or are you stupid in general? "Yes, there are different teaching styles. The question is: whether you're willing to change your approach?"
Eiko was silent for a moment. She had calmed down. "I'm willing to listen. If it means making my life easier, then I am coachable."
"Okay." Rirko clasps his hands together, rubbed them and put them on his lap. "You're using an approach that has existed ever since the ancients invented academia. It worked for a time. The student is always eager to learn from the master. However, into the modern age, the development of egos had caused our students to question everything around them. And that's fine, teachers are not perfect. They say things that may be contradictory to what they know and there are things that we still don't know about the world and ourselves."
He pointed his finger, "Are you perfect?"
Eiko thought for a moment. "I guess not."
"Good, because if you said you were, then our conversation would be over. Back to the teaching styles. One of the styles we can use for your class would be called a "student-oriented" approach.
Eiko gasped at the thought, "Making students teachers?"
"Wait until I'm finished explaining," Rirko said annoyingly. "Then you can pass judgment. In a student-oriented approach, both the student and teacher are learning together. The teacher allows the students to be part of the lesson. For example, instead of writing notes on the chalkboard, students can pair up or go into groups and collaborate on the right answer."
"Hmm…interesting."
"There is a drawback on this, however. Because there's a lot of activity, the teacher must keep tabs on all the students, lest they are doing something that has nothing to do with the lesson. You can still teach your students your way, but also include them in your lesson plans in an active way. Move around, have a debate, a discussion, do anything that would involve them."
Eiko was quiet while Rirko was explaining his foreign ways of teaching. Japan used teacher oriented approach programming. It was customary for students to have a high level of respect for their elders, especially if it was a teacher. Eiko didn't know any better. She just followed what they were teaching at the college. Her style was reinforced, maybe, in an elementary school setting. But in high school, the students were not afraid to state their minds. Her students were rebelling against her style of teaching and, inadvertently, their academics.
In her eyes, Rirko saw that she had a guilty look. He would try to comfort her.
"We make mistakes, Miss Haurmra. When we admit them in front of our students, they see that we are also human. We then build a level of respect from that very foundation. We're two weeks into the semester; you still have a chance to make your relationship with them a positive one."
"And if I don't change?" Eiko asked.
Rirko shrugged, "Then have fun. You're gonna be having a bad time trying to get a bunch of girls under control."
Eiko considered her options. She asked in a quiet voice. "Did I screw up as a teacher?"
"No…"
"Is it too late to apologize?"
"Never…"
Eiko turned to leave the room. Without a word of goodbye, she left. She obviously had a lot to think about. Her future as an educator, and as a decent human being.
Alone once again, Rirko continued with his report. It was 3:40 in the afternoon and the report was due at five. He was only halfway done.
Oorai Carrier Ship – Miho's Apartment – Night
The doorbell rang. Miho, who had changed from her high school uniform to evening wear opened the door. There all four of her friends had big, heavy bags with pillows and sheets. Yukari had camping gear.
Miho tried to give her brightest smile. "Welcome girls! Make yourself at home!"
Saori had one bag of food on each arm. "We intend to, Miporin! And we'll start by fixing up some dinner!"
On the Sensha-do training grounds, Miho was the commander. However, in the kitchen, it was Saori who reigned supreme. With the help of the others, she whipped up some traditional Japanese dishes. Mako, in anticipation, smacked her lips. As they all sat around the bountiful feast, they gave thanks.
"Thank you for the food!"
Dinner was full of talk. From Sensha-do to the latest fads. From academics to the cliques of the school. Nothing was spared. Besides from the Sensha-do topics, Miho didn't contribute to the conversation much. It was this fact that made Yukari speak up.
"Miss Nishizumi?"
"Hmm?"
"Are you interested in anything else other than Sensha-do?"
Miho had never considered any other interests besides Sensha-do. To her, Sensha-do was the only thing that she had a passion for. Everything else…was foreign. Her upbringing in the Nishizumi household didn't help either. Matter of fact, it proved more detrimental as Shiho had focused all time and energy on Sensha-do. Both Miho and Maho didn't have any opportunities to look at other interests.
The mood immediately changed. It became awkward as no one dared to say a thing.
Yukari was still awaiting an answer. "Well, do you?"
Miho shook her head. "No, I don't."
"Then what did you do for fun when you were in middle school?" Hana asked. "I know that talking about your childhood makes you uncomfortable but…"
"It's okay Hana. You girls would have to know sooner or later. The thing is…me and my sister did nothing other than Sensha-do. We didn't have time for fun."
The room was, again, dead silent. No time for fun? So, what, as a kid, did she do?
Saori tried to understand what Miho said. "No fun? You never had fun as a kid?"
"Well, that's not true. I mean, I had a lot of fun during middle school, when I had my first friends try Sensha-do out. But when I started Kuromorimine, it was back to square one. All the girls were nice to me. But only because I was a Nishizumi."
"But other than Sensha-do? You never did anything else?" Mako, who would be sleeping at this point, was wide awake concerned about her friend.
"I guess not." Miho turned very quiet. Her childhood was essentially robbed away to pave the way for her future in Sensha-do. And when she failed, she had nothing. Coming to Oorai, she didn't know what she would do when she decided to quit. She had thought it would come to her naturally. However, it didn't. This fact made her more isolated than ever until Hana and Saori began speaking to her.
They were her angels, who took her from the pit of despair and put her on the track of friendship.
Saori couldn't fathom a childhood without fun. "I'm sorry Miporin. We tried to avoid talking about your past because we knew it was uncomfortable for you. I can only imagine what you went through."
Miho was teary-eyed. She didn't want to think about her childhood. It was in the past now. She wanted to focus on the future and her own way of doing things. A future with her friends, not being alone. Why then, of all things to talk about, was this the topic of interest?
She couldn't get mad at Saori. Or either of them. They wanted to help. "It's alright. I get that you girls are concerned for me, I really do. I guess, I still have some feelings about what happened back then. I just don't want to think about it."
"We'll always be here if you want to talk," Hana assuredly gave a smile. "You know we care about you. You're our friend and we want you to be happy."
"…thank you." They were done talking about this.
After cleaning up their mess, they prepared the mats and sheets. It was hard, since Miho had a small apartment, to set up everyone. Some people were almost in the kitchen. But in the end, they could fit everyone. Yukari was set up right beside Miho's bed. Mako, Saori, and Hana were set up in various areas of the apartment.
Since it was a Friday night, they spent their time watching movie flicks on tv. It was a first for Miho as she didn't really pay attention to any movies that were playing. Her reactions to the romantic comedies was a source of amusement for all.
It was 1:00 at night. Everyone prepared to go to sleep. Everyone wished each other a good night. The lights were off, and all was calm.
Not all of them were calm, however.
In the middle of the night, Miho started to feel her heart beat hard. She had butterflies in her stomach and a feeling of dread.
"What is happening to me? Why am I feeling this way?" She was scared. She never felt a feeling this intense before. It was getting harder and harder for her to breathe.
"Help…someone please help…" she silently pleaded. Shooting out from the covers, she could only see the ceiling in the darkness though a haze. Her eyes were full of tears. She reached out her arms from over her bed as if she was reaching out to someone.
Suddenly, she felt a tight grip on her hand. The figure loomed over her. It was Yukari, she had a look of concern on her face.
"Miss Nishizumi…Miss Nishizumi, are you alright?"
Miho couldn't answer her right away. Her breathing was labored, her chest began to tighten again. She could only look at her.
"What's going on? Are you alright?"
"…scared…"
"What?"
"Scared…"
"Why? Miss Nishizumi, why are you scared?"
Tears started to streak down her cheeks. "I don't know. I don't… know why I… feel this way I…. getting hard…to breathe…help…, I'm scared, Yukari." She felt so isolated and alone although Yukari was holding her hand.
Yukari, not wanting to wake up the others, whispered. "Look at me, Miss Nishizumi. Look at me right now!"
Miho looked at her. Her stoic face met hers. Yukari squeezed Miho's hand tightly. At once, little by little, her breathing returned to normal. Her chest began to unwind. Yukari gently stroked Miho's hair. Seeing the strong commander figure she looked up to in this state shook Yukari to the core.
"Promise me," Yukari whispered, with tears in her eyes. "Promise me you'll get help. Promise me you'll see someone tomorrow. Promise me you'll tell everyone what happened."
Miho was still afraid of burdening her friends. "But…"
"No buts. Didn't you hear Miss Isuzu? You're our friend, and we want you to be happy. You tell them, or I will."
Faced with no alternative, Miho had no choice. She nodded.
"I'll stay right beside you. Until you fall asleep."
Covering up Miho, Yukari knelt beside her bed, her hand gripping hers. And she was good on her promise. Yukari stayed knelt beside her friend. Miho was reassured that someone was with her. That she was not alone. That there was nothing to fear.
The spark of consciousness dimmed within her. And then was silent.
A/N: Hoped you enjoyed. Leave a review or favorite, it does help me a ton. Thanks again.
I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
Oorai Girl's Academy – Rirko's Office – Afternoon
There simply wasn't enough physical evidence to suggest Miho's emotional distress. Sure, he had the quiz, however he needed more proof that her well-being was at risk and it was related to Sensha-do.
Taking a sip of water, he continued, for the time being, compiling the rest of the school's quizzes. He had almost past the halfway point. By 5:00, he would be needing to send the report off to the headmistress and the rest of the faulty.
He was genuine when he said that the conversation this morning didn't happen. He felt sorry for the Student Council who were only trying to keep their school going. Regardless of there being no risk of being shut down again, the MEXT minister would surely look for other opportunities to shut down the school permanently. That's why the council was so vigilant in keeping with the momentum. It was to prevent him from getting that chance.
The momentary silence was broken by the door swinging wide open.
"Mr. Nagasawa, we need to talk!" a booming voice of a lady teacher came from the door. Her simple blue attire didn't mask the curly brunette with make-up. The moment she started to shoot her mouth, Rirko shuttered.
"Butts, it's Eiko." Eiko Haurmra, nicknamed by staff and students alike as the "wicked bitch of the east," was a hard-nosed woman who believed heavily in the teacher-oriented approach. Basically, it boiled down to "I'm the teacher, you're the student, so shut up and listen like good little girls." Understandably, this made her very unpopular with the students.
Rirko tried his best to avoid her at all costs however she was able to catch him in his office. There was no escape.
"Is there a problem, Miss Haurmra," Rirko sighed.
This was her second year of teaching yet she was trying to appear older. She stomped her foot, "Yes there is. My girls are not listening to me. They are all talkative, disruptive and noisy girls that make it seem that their only goal is to make me miserable!"
"Okkkaaay…. I have only one question for you Miss Haurmra." Rirko shifted his chair. "Are you coachable?"
"Excuse me?"
"Are you coachable?"
Eiko had a puzzled look on her face. "Coachable? What does that mean? Is that a western term?"
"It depends on where you look at it. In layman's terms, it means if someone suggests you do something a different way, you'll be open to doing it."
"You mean there's a different style of teaching?"
Once again, Rirko's poker face and inward face-palm were apparent. How the hell did you become a teacher without learning-teaching styles? We're you not paying attention that class or are you stupid in general? "Yes, there are different teaching styles. The question is: whether you're willing to change your approach?"
Eiko was silent for a moment. She had calmed down. "I'm willing to listen. If it means making my life easier, then I am coachable."
"Okay." Rirko clasps his hands together, rubbed them and put them on his lap. "You're using an approach that has existed ever since the ancients invented academia. It worked for a time. The student is always eager to learn from the master. However, into the modern age, the development of egos had caused our students to question everything around them. And that's fine, teachers are not perfect. They say things that may be contradictory to what they know and there are things that we still don't know about the world and ourselves."
He pointed his finger, "Are you perfect?"
Eiko thought for a moment. "I guess not."
"Good, because if you said you were, then our conversation would be over. Back to the teaching styles. One of the styles we can use for your class would be called a "student-oriented" approach.
Eiko gasped at the thought, "Making students teachers?"
"Wait until I'm finished explaining," Rirko said annoyingly. "Then you can pass judgment. In a student-oriented approach, both the student and teacher are learning together. The teacher allows the students to be part of the lesson. For example, instead of writing notes on the chalkboard, students can pair up or go into groups and collaborate on the right answer."
"Hmm…interesting."
"There is a drawback on this, however. Because there's a lot of activity, the teacher must keep tabs on all the students, lest they are doing something that has nothing to do with the lesson. You can still teach your students your way, but also include them in your lesson plans in an active way. Move around, have a debate, a discussion, do anything that would involve them."
Eiko was quiet while Rirko was explaining his foreign ways of teaching. Japan used teacher oriented approach programming. It was customary for students to have a high level of respect for their elders, especially if it was a teacher. Eiko didn't know any better. She just followed what they were teaching at the college. Her style was reinforced, maybe, in an elementary school setting. But in high school, the students were not afraid to state their minds. Her students were rebelling against her style of teaching and, inadvertently, their academics.
In her eyes, Rirko saw that she had a guilty look. He would try to comfort her.
"We make mistakes, Miss Haurmra. When we admit them in front of our students, they see that we are also human. We then build a level of respect from that very foundation. We're two weeks into the semester; you still have a chance to make your relationship with them a positive one."
"And if I don't change?" Eiko asked.
Rirko shrugged, "Then have fun. You're gonna be having a bad time trying to get a bunch of girls under control."
Eiko considered her options. She asked in a quiet voice. "Did I screw up as a teacher?"
"No…"
"Is it too late to apologize?"
"Never…"
Eiko turned to leave the room. Without a word of goodbye, she left. She obviously had a lot to think about. Her future as an educator, and as a decent human being.
Alone once again, Rirko continued with his report. It was 3:40 in the afternoon and the report was due at five. He was only halfway done.
Oorai Carrier Ship – Miho's Apartment – Night
The doorbell rang. Miho, who had changed from her high school uniform to evening wear opened the door. There all four of her friends had big, heavy bags with pillows and sheets. Yukari had camping gear.
Miho tried to give her brightest smile. "Welcome girls! Make yourself at home!"
Saori had one bag of food on each arm. "We intend to, Miporin! And we'll start by fixing up some dinner!"
On the Sensha-do training grounds, Miho was the commander. However, in the kitchen, it was Saori who reigned supreme. With the help of the others, she whipped up some traditional Japanese dishes. Mako, in anticipation, smacked her lips. As they all sat around the bountiful feast, they gave thanks.
"Thank you for the food!"
Dinner was full of talk. From Sensha-do to the latest fads. From academics to the cliques of the school. Nothing was spared. Besides from the Sensha-do topics, Miho didn't contribute to the conversation much. It was this fact that made Yukari speak up.
"Miss Nishizumi?"
"Hmm?"
"Are you interested in anything else other than Sensha-do?"
Miho had never considered any other interests besides Sensha-do. To her, Sensha-do was the only thing that she had a passion for. Everything else…was foreign. Her upbringing in the Nishizumi household didn't help either. Matter of fact, it proved more detrimental as Shiho had focused all time and energy on Sensha-do. Both Miho and Maho didn't have any opportunities to look at other interests.
The mood immediately changed. It became awkward as no one dared to say a thing.
Yukari was still awaiting an answer. "Well, do you?"
Miho shook her head. "No, I don't."
"Then what did you do for fun when you were in middle school?" Hana asked. "I know that talking about your childhood makes you uncomfortable but…"
"It's okay Hana. You girls would have to know sooner or later. The thing is…me and my sister did nothing other than Sensha-do. We didn't have time for fun."
The room was, again, dead silent. No time for fun? So, what, as a kid, did she do?
Saori tried to understand what Miho said. "No fun? You never had fun as a kid?"
"Well, that's not true. I mean, I had a lot of fun during middle school, when I had my first friends try Sensha-do out. But when I started Kuromorimine, it was back to square one. All the girls were nice to me. But only because I was a Nishizumi."
"But other than Sensha-do? You never did anything else?" Mako, who would be sleeping at this point, was wide awake concerned about her friend.
"I guess not." Miho turned very quiet. Her childhood was essentially robbed away to pave the way for her future in Sensha-do. And when she failed, she had nothing. Coming to Oorai, she didn't know what she would do when she decided to quit. She had thought it would come to her naturally. However, it didn't. This fact made her more isolated than ever until Hana and Saori began speaking to her.
They were her angels, who took her from the pit of despair and put her on the track of friendship.
Saori couldn't fathom a childhood without fun. "I'm sorry Miporin. We tried to avoid talking about your past because we knew it was uncomfortable for you. I can only imagine what you went through."
Miho was teary-eyed. She didn't want to think about her childhood. It was in the past now. She wanted to focus on the future and her own way of doing things. A future with her friends, not being alone. Why then, of all things to talk about, was this the topic of interest?
She couldn't get mad at Saori. Or either of them. They wanted to help. "It's alright. I get that you girls are concerned for me, I really do. I guess, I still have some feelings about what happened back then. I just don't want to think about it."
"We'll always be here if you want to talk," Hana assuredly gave a smile. "You know we care about you. You're our friend and we want you to be happy."
"…thank you." They were done talking about this.
After cleaning up their mess, they prepared the mats and sheets. It was hard, since Miho had a small apartment, to set up everyone. Some people were almost in the kitchen. But in the end, they could fit everyone. Yukari was set up right beside Miho's bed. Mako, Saori, and Hana were set up in various areas of the apartment.
Since it was a Friday night, they spent their time watching movie flicks on tv. It was a first for Miho as she didn't really pay attention to any movies that were playing. Her reactions to the romantic comedies was a source of amusement for all.
It was 1:00 at night. Everyone prepared to go to sleep. Everyone wished each other a good night. The lights were off, and all was calm.
Not all of them were calm, however.
In the middle of the night, Miho started to feel her heart beat hard. She had butterflies in her stomach and a feeling of dread.
"What is happening to me? Why am I feeling this way?" She was scared. She never felt a feeling this intense before. It was getting harder and harder for her to breathe.
"Help…someone please help…" she silently pleaded. Shooting out from the covers, she could only see the ceiling in the darkness though a haze. Her eyes were full of tears. She reached out her arms from over her bed as if she was reaching out to someone.
Suddenly, she felt a tight grip on her hand. The figure loomed over her. It was Yukari, she had a look of concern on her face.
"Miss Nishizumi…Miss Nishizumi, are you alright?"
Miho couldn't answer her right away. Her breathing was labored, her chest began to tighten again. She could only look at her.
"What's going on? Are you alright?"
"…scared…"
"What?"
"Scared…"
"Why? Miss Nishizumi, why are you scared?"
Tears started to streak down her cheeks. "I don't know. I don't… know why I… feel this way I…. getting hard…to breathe…help…, I'm scared, Yukari." She felt so isolated and alone although Yukari was holding her hand.
Yukari, not wanting to wake up the others, whispered. "Look at me, Miss Nishizumi. Look at me right now!"
Miho looked at her. Her stoic face met hers. Yukari squeezed Miho's hand tightly. At once, little by little, her breathing returned to normal. Her chest began to unwind. Yukari gently stroked Miho's hair. Seeing the strong commander figure she looked up to in this state shook Yukari to the core.
"Promise me," Yukari whispered, with tears in her eyes. "Promise me you'll get help. Promise me you'll see someone tomorrow. Promise me you'll tell everyone what happened."
Miho was still afraid of burdening her friends. "But…"
"No buts. Didn't you hear Miss Isuzu? You're our friend, and we want you to be happy. You tell them, or I will."
Faced with no alternative, Miho had no choice. She nodded.
"I'll stay right beside you. Until you fall asleep."
Covering up Miho, Yukari knelt beside her bed, her hand gripping hers. And she was good on her promise. Yukari stayed knelt beside her friend. Miho was reassured that someone was with her. That she was not alone. That there was nothing to fear.
The spark of consciousness dimmed within her. And then was silent.
A/N: Hoped you enjoyed. Leave a review or favorite, it does help me a ton. Thanks again.
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Someone To Watch Over Me
DawnofWar32
War is coming. Prepare yourselves!
- Location
- Butuan City, The Philippines
Uploader's Note: I do not own the fanfic and its OCs nor Girls und Panzer. Credit goes solely to their respective owners.
A/N: Here's where things may become convoluted. However, I am hoping the flow of the story won't be affected as much. Also, I may be adding elements that are in the manga so there's that.
Thanks to all the people who PM'd me, left a review and gave me some great ideas on where to take this story. So without further ado, enjoy.
Also, formatting.
Update: Changed the wording from patriarchy to matriarchy.
Oorai Carrier Ship – Hospital – Morning
As soon as morning dawned Miho, with great apprehension, told the girls everything. While she was telling them, everyone was silent. When it was all over, Saori and Hana rushed to give her a hug. It was a long embrace full of tears. Mako was quiet until near the end. She suddenly burst out in tears. Yukari hugged her while she wept.
After clearing out Miho's apartment of clutter, they went over to the hospital's walk-in clinic. It was there that she was referred to the hospital's crisis worker. The crisis worker's job was to do an intake of a patient and see whether it warrants an intervention from a psychiatrist. As Miho was being interviewed, her friends waited in the main lobby. Everyone was silent and doing their own thing. Saori checking her phone, Hana admiring the flower shop, Yukari, and Mako looking over the various magazines.
Hana was the one who broke the silence. "Yukari. Thank you for helping Miho last night."
Yukari blushed. "She's my friend, it's the least I can do Miss Isuzu."
"How did you know what to do?" asked Saori, putting down her phone.
"Well. My family has a history of mental health issues. My kid cousin overseas suffers from panic attacks."
"Panic attacks?"
"It's when you feel that something is wrong, but there isn't. Your body reacts as if there's a danger coming. I don't know if I'm explaining it correctly." Yukari took a sip of water before continuing.
"We spent two weeks overseas one summer. I saw how my aunt talked to him whenever he had an attack coming. How she talked to him calmly and told him that everything was fine."
"Then one night, he woke up screaming. We were sleeping in the same room. I couldn't get him to talk to me so I ran to get my aunt. When she arrived, he was crying. He took his hand and had a look with no emotion. She squeezed his hand and told him to breathe. After a few minutes, he started to calm down. I was amazed how she was able to do it so easily."
As Yukari told this story, the girls realized how serious the situation had become. Had Miho not tell them anything, she would have continued to suffer alone. It was fortunate that Yukari was there to help Miho when she did. Or was it fate?
"So, what can we do for Miho now?" asked Mako.
"She may appear strong but inside is a different story," Yukari replied. "Last night was proof of that. I guess what we can do is be supportive."
"In what way?" Hana asked.
"By saying that everything is alright. Being positive during stressful situations and lending an ear if she ever wants to talk."
"That's easier said than done," Saori countered mournfully. "You know Miho, she doesn't want to burden anyone with anything. She won't come to us if there's an issue."
"We can check up on her. Make a schedule or something. Plan more events to keep her mind off worries," Hana suggested.
"We have a major problem though," Mako said bluntly.
Saori was curious. "Problem?"
"Miho's the Sensha-do team commander, remember?"
It seemed that everyone was hit with the same realization. Miho was the Sensha-do team commander and as a commander, she would have to deal with stressful situations daily.
"But she's passionate about Sensha-do," Saori replied. "It's her thing. She excels in it."
Hana was in thought. "If Miho is put in a situation, especially during the tournament…I'm worried about her. What if she has an attack during the match?"
Everyone was silent again.
"We're in way over our heads," Yukari finally admitted. "I think we may need some help."
Everyone agreed. But who could they turn to?
Miho arrived back an hour later. All the girls were anxious.
"Well, what did she say?" asked Saori. She didn't have to answer them. In her hands was a prescription and some documents "Coping with Anxiety."
Miho tried to put on a brave face. "The on-call psychiatrist said it was a panic attack. He put me on some meds to keep the symptoms…under…" She stopped talking and went to one of the seats. Her face was that of utter defeat.
"Why is this happening now? It didn't before, so why now?" The paper in her hands was being crumpled. Hana gentle sat beside her, and the others surrounded her. She took the papers from her hands and uncrumpled it.
"When something bad happens to us, we usually ask 'why us?' Mother told me that we can ask why until the end of time. It is what we do in the face of adversity that matters."
"When something bad happens to us, we usually ask 'why us?' Mother told me that we can ask why until the end of time. It is what we do in the face of adversity that matters."
Miho looked at Hana, encouraged by her words. She was right. It was no time for self-pity. She would move forward with her friend's help. As she looked around, their smiling faces gave her hope. That all the suffering she is feeling would pass away.
"Well, now what?" Mako asked after a while. "What else did the psychiatrist say?"
"He said that while he could prescribe medication to deal with the symptoms, I need to speak to someone about my…emotional state."
"What do emotions have to do with panic attacks?" Saori asked.
Just then, Mako grabbed the "Coping with Anxiety" documents and read.
"Okay. I read it. It seems possible that Miho's issues are a result of some sort of unresolved trauma. When speaking to someone about these issues, the person releases all the negative emotions that are attributed to that specific trauma. It is then that person finds closure and takes the necessary steps to move on."
Everyone was amazed but then remembered it was Mako. Of course, she could read something at lightspeed and memorized the contents easily.
"And that was all in that document?" Saori asked. Mako gave a shrug.
"So, we need a head doctor. But who to see? A psychologist?" suggested Hana
"Psychologists have a back-log of people," Yukari explained. "It would take some time before Miho would be able to see someone."
"So, who then?"
Mako, in her usual deadpan voice, stated the obvious. "We do have a school counselor."
She was right. They did have a school counselor. He would be the ideal person. Except…
"I can't see him," Miho said sternly. "It wouldn't work."
Everyone was surprised by the hostility. "Why not, Miporin? He sounds like the perfect person."
"Anyone but him. I can't."
"But why?"
It was then Yukari realized what Miho was referring to. "Is the reason because of his ability to suspend you from Sensha-do?" Miho looked towards the ground and nodded.
"That's right," Saori realized. "Miss Chono said something about that. How a counselor could suspend a team member if they were "emotionally compromised."
"And Miho fits the description of being emotionally compromised."
"That's why I can't see him, no matter how convenient it may be. If he sees me, then he'll know my problems and kick me off the team."
"He wouldn't do that if we explained it to him." Saori was being supportive. She really wanted Miho to see someone.
Miho thought for a while. Then she shook her head. "I'm sorry, I can't risk it. Please understand. I don't have any ill will against Mr. Nagasawa, it's just…he…could."
Everyone understood. Miho's passion was at stake. Sensha-do was the only thing Miho was confident in doing. Without that, then what?
Saori gave a sigh. "All right, Miporin. I'll respect your decision. I won't push it any further."
"We'll just have to figure it out later," Hana suggested. "It's been a long morning already and we're seeing Rabbit Team today."
Miho had totally forgotten. This afternoon, they were to see Rabbit Team at the park for a picnic. The weather was lovely, so now would be the best time.
"I'll call Rabbit Team to make sure we're still on." Saori whipped out her phone and started to call.
"We need to get the items prepared, they're at my house." As the group started to make their way to the entrance, Miho and Yukari hung back.
"So, when are you going to get that filled?" asked Yukari. Miho looked at the prescription. "If you don't want a repeat of last night, then get it done right away."
She knew she was right. She didn't want to go through that same pain again. Both headed towards the pharmacy for the prescription….and maybe some sleeping pills.
Oorai Carrier Ship – Café – Morning
Rirko gave a big yawn. He had all his work done and it was a weekend. The last thing he wanted to do was to get up early to meet up with the Sensha-do instructor. Sipping on his coffee, he waited for Ami to show up.
"Sorry, I'm late!" A voice rang through the streets but Rirko recognized it as Miss Ami Chono. She was running in casual wear, a black t-shirt, and jeans with blue sandals.
It took a minute to recognize who she was. "Oh! Uh, yeah. I didn't recognize you without your uniform on."
"I get that a lot." Ami grabbed a seat from a nearby table and sat across Rirko. It was straight to business.
"I was surprised that you wanted to meet with me. Especially what happened yesterday."
Ami took a sip of coffee. "Well, it's not every day a stranger gets worked up over students who he only knew for two weeks."
"I stated my reasons, didn't I?" Rirko knew that this wasn't a date. It was an exchange of information. What Ami knew about the Nishizumi and for Rirko to display his intent.
"All moral reasons, I'm sure. That's why I'm here. From what I can tell, you're not a bad guy. You can be emotional, at times. But you got a heart. I believe your knowledge can help heal Miho's heart."
This sounded like something out of a romance novel. Boy meets tsundere girl, get to know each other and in the end, they get together. But this was real life, not some fiction.
"How would I help 'heal Miho's heart,' as you would put it?"
Ami had that look. The look of 'are you seriously asking me that question?' look. "Well, how would you usually pick at someone's brain?"
Rirko thought for a moment. Taking another sip of coffee, he concluded that he could simply talk to her.
"By either telepathy or talking."
"Cute, I didn't know you were a smartass."
"Got to have a little fun, right? Otherwise, it would make me a one-dimensional character."
Ami chuckled at the exchange.
"Miho would not be forthcoming with her problems," Rirko argued. "Especially if she thinks I'm a threat."
"In what way?"
"I have the authority to suspend her from Sensha-do. Even if she wanted to talk to me, she would still think that if I saw her in an emotional state, I would suspend her outright."
Ami pondered at the thought. "Well, she doesn't know you as much. Besides the quiz you gave her, you really haven't been talking to her much, have you?"
"You're right." Rirko thought that his presence during practice would unnerve some of the members of the Sensha-do team. Especially Miho. "I simply didn't feel welcomed there."
Ami finished her coffee. "Tell you what. Why don't you come with me during practice? It'll be easier if you're with someone who they trust and in turn, you can develop something with the girls. Get to know them that way."
Rirko had considered the prospect. However, he always felt awkward when asking for help. Especially if that person is a stranger. He wanted someone else to initiate the conversation, never to start it. He had, over the years, gotten better in asking for help but the awkward part of him that felt vulnerable was always there.
Ami made a playful gesture, pointing her finger at him. "I hope that you weren't waiting for me to suggest this."
"O-of course not!" Rirko stuttered. It was a bit embarrassing but at least he had a connection to the Sensha-do team. Maybe now, they wouldn't be seen to others as a threat.
"Great! Now that's out of the way. I need to fill you in on some details."
This pipped Rirko's interest. "Oh, such as?"
"My former teacher and her family problems."
"Former teacher?"
Ami gave a cute smile. "Yeah. Shiho Nizhizumi used to be my Sensha-do insturctor."
Oorai Carrier Ship – Park – Afternoon
As expected, the weather was perfect for a picnic. The sounds of children and parents bustling around. The sights of the trees and flowers shined with the sun. A clear, blue pond with animals with children around the edge, trying to get them over to where they are.
It was also where Rabbit and Anglerfish team got together; with an addition. Rabbit invited Mallard to the picnic as well.
It was short notice, but Hana and Mako had managed to gather enough items for the picnic. Saori was able to confirm Rabbit Team's attendance, with Mallard being added in at the last minute. Yukari and Miho helped in any capacity they could. Because of this morning, Anglerfish wanted to make Miho's life easier so they had her do less as possible. In exchange, Saori suggested she spend the time looking over the strategies that the tank commanders submitted in anticipation for the match with Glorianna.
Azusa and the rest of Rabbit team, with Mallard in tow, arrived at an array of food and flower arrangement, courtesy of Hana and Saori. As Mako rested under a tree, Yukari got to know Rabbit team and their love of western movies. Hana showed Sodoko and the rest of Mallard simple flower arrangements.
It was a sight to see, and Miho took time from reading strategies and formulating plans to look at the teams and how they interacted with one another.
This is how it should be. This is how Sensha-do should be. "Friends caring for one another, having fun, not worrying about victory. This is what I want for everyone." With resolve, she continued her work.
Oorai Carrier Ship – Café – Afternoon
It was noon. Rirko and Ami spent a great deal speaking about her past relationship with Shiho Nishizumi. As expected, Ami was a font of information when it came to the Nishizumi, their doctrines, and their mindset.
The more Ami talked, the more Rirko was enticed by the intimacies of Japanese society. Like something out of the history books, the Nishizumi were part of a matriarchy system. Shiho Nishizumi was the current head of the family with Maho as heir apparent. Miho, also an heir for all legal purposes, had always shown resistance in the Nishizumi style. To advance, never retreat and sacrifice to obtain victory at all costs.
Miho's defeat at the finals was considered a disgrace for the Nishizumi as well as Kuromorimine. To rectify this, the school disassociated itself with those involved in the incident. The plan was to force the guilty parties to transfer away from Kuromorimine for their 'failure.' As for Miho, even though the failure of the match would have been the fault of the team commander, because she charged in front of witnesses, she was pegged as the scapegoat.
The endgame was to purge the Nishizumi of its taint and restore it to its former glory.
"So, Shiho did it for the good of the Nishizumi clan then?" Rirko asked.
"It was the easiest way for Kuromorimine to save face," replied Ami. "Placing the blame solely on Miho made Maho, the heir, blameless. It was chalked up to insubordination."
"And so, Maho was part of the conspiracy?"
Ami took a breather, after all of that talking. "Or, she didn't have a choice in it."
"What do you mean?"
"Maho would have done anything for Miho. It could have been a lot worse if Maho didn't temper her rage. Miho could have been disowned outright but instead she was sent away."
"And this relationship between these two sisters?"
"Miho and Maho had always been close. They were their own best friends growing up. Inseparable. The gap was due to expectations that Shiho had for her daughters."
Rirko understood. Shiho had forced her dream upon her own daughters. To continue the Nishizumi legacy, Maho needed to be cold and ruthless as she was. Her parenting was that of the worst kind of depravity.
"Miho and Maho. Miho spoke a desire to see her again."
"No surprise," Ami smiled. "They are pretty devoted to one another. Despite the circumstances."
"So, Maho's allegiance may not belong to the Nishizumi name or to her mother after all. It may have, and it would always belong, to Miho."
Ami looked at Rirko for a moment. "I…didn't think of it that way. What made you come to that conclusion."
Rirko shrugged. "It's conjecture, at best. I think I can make a story out of the information you've given me. This is shooting in the dark, though. However, if what you're saying is true, Maho knew the type of person her mother was. Growing up in that environment, Maho knew that being there would only stunt their growth, more so deteriorate it. She must have done everything in her power to shield Miho from her mother's fanatic ideals. But when Miho saved those tank mates…it must have screwed everything up. Because of this, the hammer came down, leaving Maho's efforts moot."
"It also left an opportunity. With this reason, Miho moved away, away from that environment. But with this, also came an uncertainty. Oorai was a school with no Sensha-do team. Maho must have been frustrated by the fact that a talented girl like Miho would choose to wallow in her shame. But, by fate, Sensha-do came back and appointed Miho as team commander. And the rest, as they say, is history."
Ami was left speechless.
Rirko shrugged again. "Hey, it's only conjecture. The story may be all true or false. The characters are based on what you've told me."
"But Maho's cold and calculating. True to the Nishizumi style, she is ruthless in her advances, and more so towards her enemies."
"But is that all to Maho? Or is there more?"
"More?"
"Everyone wears a mask. To hide their true self from others. She may look intimidating, unfriendly and merciless. But is this the true Maho Nishizumi? Do we know her enough to be certain of that? Or, is this some fabrication of something that someone wants to see?"
Her eyes grew wide with realization that there's more to a person than meets the eye. "So, Maho's been faking the cold routine for all these years? Why?"
"Who do you think?"
Ami wondered on the 'who.' Then it was obvious. "Oh…"
"Think about it. Shiho wanted an heir. Someone to continue the legacy. She has two. If Maho became the perfect heir, the obedient one, then she would have no need for Miho. She would be able to do whatever she wished."
"…she would be free."
"And it's in that the reason for Maho's behavior. Shiho is so focused on molding Maho in her own image, she hardly pays any attention to Miho. For Miho to be happy, she sacrificed her own happiness for her sister's."
"Is this relatively possible?" Ami asked in a state of disbelief.
"It's possible. I swear, if that's the case, then that girl has balls of steel! Being under constant surveillance, always watching what you say, being the good little girl that society and the family placed upon you."
"…. balls of steel?"
"It's a western saying. To have extreme courage."
"Oh…" Another awkward silence. This revelation needed time for processing. Ami had only told Rirko what she knew from her experiences with Maho and Shiho. And yet, in the span of a few hours, he could dissect the Nishizumi family in a way she could never imagine.
Rirko cleared his throat. "Once again…conjecture."
"So…now what?"
"Simple." Rirko got up and dusted himself off. "We wait and see what develops."
Oorai Carrier Ship – Miho's Apartment – Evening
It was evening when Miho got home. Alone again, she surveyed the empty apartment. Her friends were not with her. She was by her lonesome…again…as she had always been.
She sighed as she put her bag down and changed out of her outdoor clothes. Powering on the computer, she ate a bowl of instant ramen for dinner while finalizing the strategies for the match. Before her bedtime, she took a tablet of the medicine the psychiatrist prescribed to her.
"It's only temporary. I won't be taking this for too long. I'll be back to my normal self."
Sitting back down, she planned to burn the midnight oil by planning for every possible outcome. However, this was more a distraction than anything. Once again, she dreaded the thought of going to sleep in the fear the panic attack might come again.
It was 11:30 at night and Miho's eyes became heavy. Shutting down the computer for the night, she did her nightly routine and prepared for sleep. Turning off the lights, she crawled into her covers and stared at the ceiling. It had only been an hour before she felt discomfort. The anxiety wasn't as intense as last time but it did make her uncomfortable.
Sitting on her bed, she tried some breathing techniques that she read about a few hours prior. It made her feel a lot better. She sat there…for a full five minutes.
Then suddenly, she reached over to the nightstand, where her phone was charging. She was about to call Yukari. The contact information selected, she only needed to hit the green button.
One problem…she didn't.
She couldn't do it. Her mind said to do it but her heart couldn't burden her friends any more than she already had. Putting her phone away, she tried going back under her covers and sleeping. Miho knew she couldn't function like this. Soon, it would affect her everyday activities. Then she wouldn't be able to Sensha-do even if she wanted to.
Despite the risk of being kicked out, Miho knew in her heart her friends were right. Her well-being was important. On the interim, she needed to speak with someone...anyone. Come Monday, however, she would speak to the school counselor. Downing a sleeping pill, she waited until it took effect.
A/N: So, I hoped you liked. Most of the reviews and PMs about this are positive. I just want to remind everyone that this is just a fan fiction. If you're not satisfied with it, then by all means there are other stories that may be more suitable for you. Anyways, I just wanted to clear that up. Reviews and favorites are appreciated. Thanks for the love.
A/N: Here's where things may become convoluted. However, I am hoping the flow of the story won't be affected as much. Also, I may be adding elements that are in the manga so there's that.
Thanks to all the people who PM'd me, left a review and gave me some great ideas on where to take this story. So without further ado, enjoy.
Also, formatting.
Update: Changed the wording from patriarchy to matriarchy.
Oorai Carrier Ship – Hospital – Morning
As soon as morning dawned Miho, with great apprehension, told the girls everything. While she was telling them, everyone was silent. When it was all over, Saori and Hana rushed to give her a hug. It was a long embrace full of tears. Mako was quiet until near the end. She suddenly burst out in tears. Yukari hugged her while she wept.
After clearing out Miho's apartment of clutter, they went over to the hospital's walk-in clinic. It was there that she was referred to the hospital's crisis worker. The crisis worker's job was to do an intake of a patient and see whether it warrants an intervention from a psychiatrist. As Miho was being interviewed, her friends waited in the main lobby. Everyone was silent and doing their own thing. Saori checking her phone, Hana admiring the flower shop, Yukari, and Mako looking over the various magazines.
Hana was the one who broke the silence. "Yukari. Thank you for helping Miho last night."
Yukari blushed. "She's my friend, it's the least I can do Miss Isuzu."
"How did you know what to do?" asked Saori, putting down her phone.
"Well. My family has a history of mental health issues. My kid cousin overseas suffers from panic attacks."
"Panic attacks?"
"It's when you feel that something is wrong, but there isn't. Your body reacts as if there's a danger coming. I don't know if I'm explaining it correctly." Yukari took a sip of water before continuing.
"We spent two weeks overseas one summer. I saw how my aunt talked to him whenever he had an attack coming. How she talked to him calmly and told him that everything was fine."
"Then one night, he woke up screaming. We were sleeping in the same room. I couldn't get him to talk to me so I ran to get my aunt. When she arrived, he was crying. He took his hand and had a look with no emotion. She squeezed his hand and told him to breathe. After a few minutes, he started to calm down. I was amazed how she was able to do it so easily."
As Yukari told this story, the girls realized how serious the situation had become. Had Miho not tell them anything, she would have continued to suffer alone. It was fortunate that Yukari was there to help Miho when she did. Or was it fate?
"So, what can we do for Miho now?" asked Mako.
"She may appear strong but inside is a different story," Yukari replied. "Last night was proof of that. I guess what we can do is be supportive."
"In what way?" Hana asked.
"By saying that everything is alright. Being positive during stressful situations and lending an ear if she ever wants to talk."
"That's easier said than done," Saori countered mournfully. "You know Miho, she doesn't want to burden anyone with anything. She won't come to us if there's an issue."
"We can check up on her. Make a schedule or something. Plan more events to keep her mind off worries," Hana suggested.
"We have a major problem though," Mako said bluntly.
Saori was curious. "Problem?"
"Miho's the Sensha-do team commander, remember?"
It seemed that everyone was hit with the same realization. Miho was the Sensha-do team commander and as a commander, she would have to deal with stressful situations daily.
"But she's passionate about Sensha-do," Saori replied. "It's her thing. She excels in it."
Hana was in thought. "If Miho is put in a situation, especially during the tournament…I'm worried about her. What if she has an attack during the match?"
Everyone was silent again.
"We're in way over our heads," Yukari finally admitted. "I think we may need some help."
Everyone agreed. But who could they turn to?
Miho arrived back an hour later. All the girls were anxious.
"Well, what did she say?" asked Saori. She didn't have to answer them. In her hands was a prescription and some documents "Coping with Anxiety."
Miho tried to put on a brave face. "The on-call psychiatrist said it was a panic attack. He put me on some meds to keep the symptoms…under…" She stopped talking and went to one of the seats. Her face was that of utter defeat.
"Why is this happening now? It didn't before, so why now?" The paper in her hands was being crumpled. Hana gentle sat beside her, and the others surrounded her. She took the papers from her hands and uncrumpled it.
"When something bad happens to us, we usually ask 'why us?' Mother told me that we can ask why until the end of time. It is what we do in the face of adversity that matters."
"When something bad happens to us, we usually ask 'why us?' Mother told me that we can ask why until the end of time. It is what we do in the face of adversity that matters."
Miho looked at Hana, encouraged by her words. She was right. It was no time for self-pity. She would move forward with her friend's help. As she looked around, their smiling faces gave her hope. That all the suffering she is feeling would pass away.
"Well, now what?" Mako asked after a while. "What else did the psychiatrist say?"
"He said that while he could prescribe medication to deal with the symptoms, I need to speak to someone about my…emotional state."
"What do emotions have to do with panic attacks?" Saori asked.
Just then, Mako grabbed the "Coping with Anxiety" documents and read.
"Okay. I read it. It seems possible that Miho's issues are a result of some sort of unresolved trauma. When speaking to someone about these issues, the person releases all the negative emotions that are attributed to that specific trauma. It is then that person finds closure and takes the necessary steps to move on."
Everyone was amazed but then remembered it was Mako. Of course, she could read something at lightspeed and memorized the contents easily.
"And that was all in that document?" Saori asked. Mako gave a shrug.
"So, we need a head doctor. But who to see? A psychologist?" suggested Hana
"Psychologists have a back-log of people," Yukari explained. "It would take some time before Miho would be able to see someone."
"So, who then?"
Mako, in her usual deadpan voice, stated the obvious. "We do have a school counselor."
She was right. They did have a school counselor. He would be the ideal person. Except…
"I can't see him," Miho said sternly. "It wouldn't work."
Everyone was surprised by the hostility. "Why not, Miporin? He sounds like the perfect person."
"Anyone but him. I can't."
"But why?"
It was then Yukari realized what Miho was referring to. "Is the reason because of his ability to suspend you from Sensha-do?" Miho looked towards the ground and nodded.
"That's right," Saori realized. "Miss Chono said something about that. How a counselor could suspend a team member if they were "emotionally compromised."
"And Miho fits the description of being emotionally compromised."
"That's why I can't see him, no matter how convenient it may be. If he sees me, then he'll know my problems and kick me off the team."
"He wouldn't do that if we explained it to him." Saori was being supportive. She really wanted Miho to see someone.
Miho thought for a while. Then she shook her head. "I'm sorry, I can't risk it. Please understand. I don't have any ill will against Mr. Nagasawa, it's just…he…could."
Everyone understood. Miho's passion was at stake. Sensha-do was the only thing Miho was confident in doing. Without that, then what?
Saori gave a sigh. "All right, Miporin. I'll respect your decision. I won't push it any further."
"We'll just have to figure it out later," Hana suggested. "It's been a long morning already and we're seeing Rabbit Team today."
Miho had totally forgotten. This afternoon, they were to see Rabbit Team at the park for a picnic. The weather was lovely, so now would be the best time.
"I'll call Rabbit Team to make sure we're still on." Saori whipped out her phone and started to call.
"We need to get the items prepared, they're at my house." As the group started to make their way to the entrance, Miho and Yukari hung back.
"So, when are you going to get that filled?" asked Yukari. Miho looked at the prescription. "If you don't want a repeat of last night, then get it done right away."
She knew she was right. She didn't want to go through that same pain again. Both headed towards the pharmacy for the prescription….and maybe some sleeping pills.
Oorai Carrier Ship – Café – Morning
Rirko gave a big yawn. He had all his work done and it was a weekend. The last thing he wanted to do was to get up early to meet up with the Sensha-do instructor. Sipping on his coffee, he waited for Ami to show up.
"Sorry, I'm late!" A voice rang through the streets but Rirko recognized it as Miss Ami Chono. She was running in casual wear, a black t-shirt, and jeans with blue sandals.
It took a minute to recognize who she was. "Oh! Uh, yeah. I didn't recognize you without your uniform on."
"I get that a lot." Ami grabbed a seat from a nearby table and sat across Rirko. It was straight to business.
"I was surprised that you wanted to meet with me. Especially what happened yesterday."
Ami took a sip of coffee. "Well, it's not every day a stranger gets worked up over students who he only knew for two weeks."
"I stated my reasons, didn't I?" Rirko knew that this wasn't a date. It was an exchange of information. What Ami knew about the Nishizumi and for Rirko to display his intent.
"All moral reasons, I'm sure. That's why I'm here. From what I can tell, you're not a bad guy. You can be emotional, at times. But you got a heart. I believe your knowledge can help heal Miho's heart."
This sounded like something out of a romance novel. Boy meets tsundere girl, get to know each other and in the end, they get together. But this was real life, not some fiction.
"How would I help 'heal Miho's heart,' as you would put it?"
Ami had that look. The look of 'are you seriously asking me that question?' look. "Well, how would you usually pick at someone's brain?"
Rirko thought for a moment. Taking another sip of coffee, he concluded that he could simply talk to her.
"By either telepathy or talking."
"Cute, I didn't know you were a smartass."
"Got to have a little fun, right? Otherwise, it would make me a one-dimensional character."
Ami chuckled at the exchange.
"Miho would not be forthcoming with her problems," Rirko argued. "Especially if she thinks I'm a threat."
"In what way?"
"I have the authority to suspend her from Sensha-do. Even if she wanted to talk to me, she would still think that if I saw her in an emotional state, I would suspend her outright."
Ami pondered at the thought. "Well, she doesn't know you as much. Besides the quiz you gave her, you really haven't been talking to her much, have you?"
"You're right." Rirko thought that his presence during practice would unnerve some of the members of the Sensha-do team. Especially Miho. "I simply didn't feel welcomed there."
Ami finished her coffee. "Tell you what. Why don't you come with me during practice? It'll be easier if you're with someone who they trust and in turn, you can develop something with the girls. Get to know them that way."
Rirko had considered the prospect. However, he always felt awkward when asking for help. Especially if that person is a stranger. He wanted someone else to initiate the conversation, never to start it. He had, over the years, gotten better in asking for help but the awkward part of him that felt vulnerable was always there.
Ami made a playful gesture, pointing her finger at him. "I hope that you weren't waiting for me to suggest this."
"O-of course not!" Rirko stuttered. It was a bit embarrassing but at least he had a connection to the Sensha-do team. Maybe now, they wouldn't be seen to others as a threat.
"Great! Now that's out of the way. I need to fill you in on some details."
This pipped Rirko's interest. "Oh, such as?"
"My former teacher and her family problems."
"Former teacher?"
Ami gave a cute smile. "Yeah. Shiho Nizhizumi used to be my Sensha-do insturctor."
Oorai Carrier Ship – Park – Afternoon
As expected, the weather was perfect for a picnic. The sounds of children and parents bustling around. The sights of the trees and flowers shined with the sun. A clear, blue pond with animals with children around the edge, trying to get them over to where they are.
It was also where Rabbit and Anglerfish team got together; with an addition. Rabbit invited Mallard to the picnic as well.
It was short notice, but Hana and Mako had managed to gather enough items for the picnic. Saori was able to confirm Rabbit Team's attendance, with Mallard being added in at the last minute. Yukari and Miho helped in any capacity they could. Because of this morning, Anglerfish wanted to make Miho's life easier so they had her do less as possible. In exchange, Saori suggested she spend the time looking over the strategies that the tank commanders submitted in anticipation for the match with Glorianna.
Azusa and the rest of Rabbit team, with Mallard in tow, arrived at an array of food and flower arrangement, courtesy of Hana and Saori. As Mako rested under a tree, Yukari got to know Rabbit team and their love of western movies. Hana showed Sodoko and the rest of Mallard simple flower arrangements.
It was a sight to see, and Miho took time from reading strategies and formulating plans to look at the teams and how they interacted with one another.
This is how it should be. This is how Sensha-do should be. "Friends caring for one another, having fun, not worrying about victory. This is what I want for everyone." With resolve, she continued her work.
Oorai Carrier Ship – Café – Afternoon
It was noon. Rirko and Ami spent a great deal speaking about her past relationship with Shiho Nishizumi. As expected, Ami was a font of information when it came to the Nishizumi, their doctrines, and their mindset.
The more Ami talked, the more Rirko was enticed by the intimacies of Japanese society. Like something out of the history books, the Nishizumi were part of a matriarchy system. Shiho Nishizumi was the current head of the family with Maho as heir apparent. Miho, also an heir for all legal purposes, had always shown resistance in the Nishizumi style. To advance, never retreat and sacrifice to obtain victory at all costs.
Miho's defeat at the finals was considered a disgrace for the Nishizumi as well as Kuromorimine. To rectify this, the school disassociated itself with those involved in the incident. The plan was to force the guilty parties to transfer away from Kuromorimine for their 'failure.' As for Miho, even though the failure of the match would have been the fault of the team commander, because she charged in front of witnesses, she was pegged as the scapegoat.
The endgame was to purge the Nishizumi of its taint and restore it to its former glory.
"So, Shiho did it for the good of the Nishizumi clan then?" Rirko asked.
"It was the easiest way for Kuromorimine to save face," replied Ami. "Placing the blame solely on Miho made Maho, the heir, blameless. It was chalked up to insubordination."
"And so, Maho was part of the conspiracy?"
Ami took a breather, after all of that talking. "Or, she didn't have a choice in it."
"What do you mean?"
"Maho would have done anything for Miho. It could have been a lot worse if Maho didn't temper her rage. Miho could have been disowned outright but instead she was sent away."
"And this relationship between these two sisters?"
"Miho and Maho had always been close. They were their own best friends growing up. Inseparable. The gap was due to expectations that Shiho had for her daughters."
Rirko understood. Shiho had forced her dream upon her own daughters. To continue the Nishizumi legacy, Maho needed to be cold and ruthless as she was. Her parenting was that of the worst kind of depravity.
"Miho and Maho. Miho spoke a desire to see her again."
"No surprise," Ami smiled. "They are pretty devoted to one another. Despite the circumstances."
"So, Maho's allegiance may not belong to the Nishizumi name or to her mother after all. It may have, and it would always belong, to Miho."
Ami looked at Rirko for a moment. "I…didn't think of it that way. What made you come to that conclusion."
Rirko shrugged. "It's conjecture, at best. I think I can make a story out of the information you've given me. This is shooting in the dark, though. However, if what you're saying is true, Maho knew the type of person her mother was. Growing up in that environment, Maho knew that being there would only stunt their growth, more so deteriorate it. She must have done everything in her power to shield Miho from her mother's fanatic ideals. But when Miho saved those tank mates…it must have screwed everything up. Because of this, the hammer came down, leaving Maho's efforts moot."
"It also left an opportunity. With this reason, Miho moved away, away from that environment. But with this, also came an uncertainty. Oorai was a school with no Sensha-do team. Maho must have been frustrated by the fact that a talented girl like Miho would choose to wallow in her shame. But, by fate, Sensha-do came back and appointed Miho as team commander. And the rest, as they say, is history."
Ami was left speechless.
Rirko shrugged again. "Hey, it's only conjecture. The story may be all true or false. The characters are based on what you've told me."
"But Maho's cold and calculating. True to the Nishizumi style, she is ruthless in her advances, and more so towards her enemies."
"But is that all to Maho? Or is there more?"
"More?"
"Everyone wears a mask. To hide their true self from others. She may look intimidating, unfriendly and merciless. But is this the true Maho Nishizumi? Do we know her enough to be certain of that? Or, is this some fabrication of something that someone wants to see?"
Her eyes grew wide with realization that there's more to a person than meets the eye. "So, Maho's been faking the cold routine for all these years? Why?"
"Who do you think?"
Ami wondered on the 'who.' Then it was obvious. "Oh…"
"Think about it. Shiho wanted an heir. Someone to continue the legacy. She has two. If Maho became the perfect heir, the obedient one, then she would have no need for Miho. She would be able to do whatever she wished."
"…she would be free."
"And it's in that the reason for Maho's behavior. Shiho is so focused on molding Maho in her own image, she hardly pays any attention to Miho. For Miho to be happy, she sacrificed her own happiness for her sister's."
"Is this relatively possible?" Ami asked in a state of disbelief.
"It's possible. I swear, if that's the case, then that girl has balls of steel! Being under constant surveillance, always watching what you say, being the good little girl that society and the family placed upon you."
"…. balls of steel?"
"It's a western saying. To have extreme courage."
"Oh…" Another awkward silence. This revelation needed time for processing. Ami had only told Rirko what she knew from her experiences with Maho and Shiho. And yet, in the span of a few hours, he could dissect the Nishizumi family in a way she could never imagine.
Rirko cleared his throat. "Once again…conjecture."
"So…now what?"
"Simple." Rirko got up and dusted himself off. "We wait and see what develops."
Oorai Carrier Ship – Miho's Apartment – Evening
It was evening when Miho got home. Alone again, she surveyed the empty apartment. Her friends were not with her. She was by her lonesome…again…as she had always been.
She sighed as she put her bag down and changed out of her outdoor clothes. Powering on the computer, she ate a bowl of instant ramen for dinner while finalizing the strategies for the match. Before her bedtime, she took a tablet of the medicine the psychiatrist prescribed to her.
"It's only temporary. I won't be taking this for too long. I'll be back to my normal self."
Sitting back down, she planned to burn the midnight oil by planning for every possible outcome. However, this was more a distraction than anything. Once again, she dreaded the thought of going to sleep in the fear the panic attack might come again.
It was 11:30 at night and Miho's eyes became heavy. Shutting down the computer for the night, she did her nightly routine and prepared for sleep. Turning off the lights, she crawled into her covers and stared at the ceiling. It had only been an hour before she felt discomfort. The anxiety wasn't as intense as last time but it did make her uncomfortable.
Sitting on her bed, she tried some breathing techniques that she read about a few hours prior. It made her feel a lot better. She sat there…for a full five minutes.
Then suddenly, she reached over to the nightstand, where her phone was charging. She was about to call Yukari. The contact information selected, she only needed to hit the green button.
One problem…she didn't.
She couldn't do it. Her mind said to do it but her heart couldn't burden her friends any more than she already had. Putting her phone away, she tried going back under her covers and sleeping. Miho knew she couldn't function like this. Soon, it would affect her everyday activities. Then she wouldn't be able to Sensha-do even if she wanted to.
Despite the risk of being kicked out, Miho knew in her heart her friends were right. Her well-being was important. On the interim, she needed to speak with someone...anyone. Come Monday, however, she would speak to the school counselor. Downing a sleeping pill, she waited until it took effect.
A/N: So, I hoped you liked. Most of the reviews and PMs about this are positive. I just want to remind everyone that this is just a fan fiction. If you're not satisfied with it, then by all means there are other stories that may be more suitable for you. Anyways, I just wanted to clear that up. Reviews and favorites are appreciated. Thanks for the love.