A Study In Fire
I experienced an epiphany some time after my late night adventure. As bowel looseningly terrifying as that experience was, it was also illuminating. And I'm not talking about my magic lantern.
As I slunk through the trees like a rat, desperately hoping to avoid the notice of the titans moving around me as I scurried beneath their shadows to snatch up their scraps, there was a primal energy running through the air. And through me. I wonder if this was how our ancestors always felt in prehistoric times, when we were nowhere close to the top of the food chain.
Despite the constant fear and adrenaline, or perhaps because of it, there was a...purity to it all. Nothing else mattered except the present moment, and living to experience the next. But being so thoroughly returned to that primitive state of mind made me think about how we've supposedly evolved beyond it as a species.
The primary source of this ascendance is, of course, fire. It provides light to the dark, warmth to the cold, and keeps our predators away. (Or at least it did back in a more rational world, I doubt it would apply to some of the things I've seen here.) It was through fire that we forged the tools we needed to wrest control of our destinies from the world that birthed us, and build a new one in our image. More than any canine, fire is man's true best friend.
But I've neglected another key aspect of our relationship with fire until now. And that is the ability to cook the food I've been so desperately gathering. Eating and digesting raw food is unfeasibly difficult. I can see it just from watching all the chewing the animals around me all have to do. It's no wonder they never get anything meaningful done, when they have to spend all their time getting and processing food!
But cooking changes the entire game, softening tissues, releasing nutrients, and generally making ingestion and digestion more efficient. And more pleasant if you do it right. That's not to say I haven't tried cooking any of my food before, such as the stew and jerky I made from the Tusker piglet.
But it's rarely been a concerted effort. Quite often I would find myself chowing down on my finds even whilst collecting them. Well no more. After returning from my late night scavenging trip, I was loaded with various fruits, vegetables, mushrooms, roots, and meat. After all the risks I took to get them, I was determined to make the most of them.
Rather than haphazardly throwing all my dinner ingredients together into Pot, I decided to experiment. I separated them into multiple small portions, and prepared each one differently. I actually did make a small amount of stew, along with kebab skewers, a stuffed tuber, meat and fruits wrapped in leaves and sealed in river clay for steaming, and others. I tried to get creative with my limited seasoning options, sprinkling with sea salt and mixing flavors.
As I carefully moved through the steps to prepare my personal feast, I became intimately more familiar with Fire. I learned to think of it almost as a living thing. Fire breathes and eats, dances and crackles. It will grow beyond your control and bite you if you don't respect it. And this growth has levels, going from simmering embers to a roaring flame.
I made use of these various stages, searing on flat stones, boiling, baking, and even placing a few specimens directly into the coals to give them a nice bit of char. When I finally sat down to partake in the cornucopia before me, I took a moment just to immerse myself in the medley of aromas, backed by a foundation of steam and wood smoke.
I took my first bites, filling myself with flavor and heat. I can honestly say that it wasn't that well made or delicious, I'm still no chef after all. But that meal left me feeling more...human, than I've felt since I woke up here. I could examine my surroundings with fresh eyes.
The sun had set below the horizon, but there was just enough light to dye the undersides of the clouds in bright hues of pink and orange. It was gradually being overtaken by the glow of the nearly full moon, and the stars that were appearing one by one in the deep indigo sky. My hair was ruffled by the breeze coming off the river, carrying the symphony of the forest at night time.
Those hours by the fire were a gift, and for all the strife I've been subjected to in my time here, I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. It was a reminder that beyond the daily grind of survival, I shouldn't forget to actually
live. To take a step back and appreciate the beauty around me when I can.
Is this how the Tiö used to live, how they viewed the world every day, before the poisoned hope of prophecy sunk its claws into them? If so, it's no wonder that Shelog is so desperate to return them to that pastoral state. A truly worthy goal, I now wonder if I can help her to accomplish it in some way.
Perhaps more sophisticated philosophers would scoff at my attempts to parse meaning out of mere fire touched flesh. But that meal is something that will always stay with me.