Remember, Asuka is getting Shinji's memories of Rei bleeding through - that includes his first meeting with her.
Defence in Depth [NGE]
- Thread starter grommile
- Start date
Remember, Asuka is getting Shinji's memories of Rei bleeding through - that includes his first meeting with her.
- Location
- National Capital Region, USA
grommile
nasty-minded old cynic
- Location
- NERV-Mercia
- Pronouns
- Traditional/Animate
Ahem. Episode 06 is already in the past
Crazael
Rehydrated Demon King
- Location
- Lost to the vagaries of time.
Ok, the image of Rei piling spices and such onto all of her meals is an amusing one.
I like the way you write Shinji and Asuka together. It's nice to see a Shinji with a bit more of a social backbone and an Asuka who isn't as aggressively abrasive.
greensun
You shall all burn beneath my light!!!
It's interesting to note how much better Asuka and Rei's face to face meeting is (not counting memories). Asuka's not flubbing her introduction and Rei isn't brushing off an honest (if bungled) attempt at making friends. The inital meeting that made Asuka so aggressive towards Rei never happened (and yes, I'm blaming Rei here, kid is anti-social as fuck most of the time and that is not healthy).
Things are... Well, Rei is kinda coming off as weirdo, but they most certainly better. It probably helps that Shinji is fond of Rei.
Things are... Well, Rei is kinda coming off as weirdo, but they most certainly better. It probably helps that Shinji is fond of Rei.
The despite the whole getting shot at thing, the pair of them have had a good few weeks; they're successful in their missions, they're getting along with each other and have become friends. As a pair, they're doing fine.
- Location
- In the depts of despair.
With Shinji and Rei, she is not so abrasive with Shinji and Rei. Anyone else she probably is going to double down on the fiery redhead act to remind everyone (including herself) that she is not getting soft.
Frankly I would say that I feel sorry for Touji and Kensuke except for the part that sooner or later they will have the 'good' idea of selling spicy photos of Asuka, so really what's coming to them they earned, even if she doesn't know it yet.
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grommile
nasty-minded old cynic
- Location
- NERV-Mercia
- Pronouns
- Traditional/Animate
So, uh, at this point my headcanon is that canon Rei is (by human metrics) introverted and some flavour of neurodivergent, and Asuka's canon behaviour (which looks more like "attempted dominance display" than "trying to make friends") is 200% the wrong way to go about connecting with a neurodivergent introvert.
- Location
- The Midlands.
Pretty sure it doesn't work that well on neurotypical people either.
Also, this is the first time I've ever seen someone try writing Rei as being on the autism spectrum as opposed to just a victim of severe lack of socialisation. How well that's supported by canon is somewhat debateable, but it's nothing if not a change of pace.
greensun
You shall all burn beneath my light!!!
Hey, I did say flubbed. Perhaps belly-flopped onto concrete is the better analogy.
The girl's default thing to do when she's on unfamiliar social ground is to gear up the aggression. See the kiss with Shinji. I've got no doubt that Asuka wanted to befriend Rei, she is a profoundly lonely girl, but her default to any social situation she's out of her depth is to attempt to dominate the situation. Just like how Shinji's default is passiveness.
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Crazael
Rehydrated Demon King
- Location
- Lost to the vagaries of time.
Maybe. But it really about the worst possible way to try to interact with autistics or introverts. Let alone someone who is both.
Partial drafts: Crosstalk
grommile
nasty-minded old cynic
- Location
- NERV-Mercia
- Pronouns
- Traditional/Animate
A partial draft of the next update:
The three pilots sat around Misato's dining table, with Asuka and Shinji facing each other and Rei sat at the end of the table watching them both. Shinji's right hand was palm-down on the table, and Asuka's left was palm-down on top of it.
Shinji felt pressure against the palm of his left hand, like he was resting it on top of someone else's, and an entirely unfamiliar band of pressure around his ribcage.
Asuka felt pressure against the back and the palm of her right hand, like it was sandwiched between someone else's hand and something hard and flat.
Rei's inhuman senses showed her the transposed fragments of her fellow pilots' souls lighting up.
"This is weird," declared Asuka, flexing her right hand. "It's like I'm feeling what you're touching."
Shinji shifted slightly in his seat, and Asuka felt a bundle of sensation, mostly an uncomfortable pressure, that seemed to be coming from somewhere she didn't—
Facts connected in her brain, and with a cry of "pervert!" she slapped him with her right hand. The impact registered in her hand and her face simultaneously, making her flinch and breaking the sensory connection.
"Ow!" cried Shinji and Asuka in unison.
"What was that for?" added Shinji.
Asuka rubbed her cheek, despite the pain having vanished as soon as she stopped touching Shinji. "You were being a perv!"
"How do you know that?" interjected Rei, confused by the exchange.
Asuka and Shinji both went red, and Asuka managed to get some words out. "Look, I know what the pressure I felt means, OK?"
Rei put together the pieces of the situation in her head and nodded. She didn't entirely understand why it bothered Asuka, but it was good enough to work with. "I see. I'm sorry this upset you. It proves I was right about your status, though."
"So... there's part of my soul in Asuka, and part of hers in me?"
"Yes," replied Rei. "When you touch each other, you connect to the missing part and receive sensory impressions from it."
"I don't want part of Shinji in me!"
Shinji raised an eyebrow at the outburst, and Asuka fled the table with her cheeks blazing.
Also: So far I've been managing... OK, I guess, without a beta, but I'm starting to think that having one would be nifty. Some of the gaps would probably have been shorter with someone other than my own inner critic to run things past.
The three pilots sat around Misato's dining table, with Asuka and Shinji facing each other and Rei sat at the end of the table watching them both. Shinji's right hand was palm-down on the table, and Asuka's left was palm-down on top of it.
Shinji felt pressure against the palm of his left hand, like he was resting it on top of someone else's, and an entirely unfamiliar band of pressure around his ribcage.
Asuka felt pressure against the back and the palm of her right hand, like it was sandwiched between someone else's hand and something hard and flat.
Rei's inhuman senses showed her the transposed fragments of her fellow pilots' souls lighting up.
"This is weird," declared Asuka, flexing her right hand. "It's like I'm feeling what you're touching."
Shinji shifted slightly in his seat, and Asuka felt a bundle of sensation, mostly an uncomfortable pressure, that seemed to be coming from somewhere she didn't—
Facts connected in her brain, and with a cry of "pervert!" she slapped him with her right hand. The impact registered in her hand and her face simultaneously, making her flinch and breaking the sensory connection.
"Ow!" cried Shinji and Asuka in unison.
"What was that for?" added Shinji.
Asuka rubbed her cheek, despite the pain having vanished as soon as she stopped touching Shinji. "You were being a perv!"
"How do you know that?" interjected Rei, confused by the exchange.
Asuka and Shinji both went red, and Asuka managed to get some words out. "Look, I know what the pressure I felt means, OK?"
Rei put together the pieces of the situation in her head and nodded. She didn't entirely understand why it bothered Asuka, but it was good enough to work with. "I see. I'm sorry this upset you. It proves I was right about your status, though."
"So... there's part of my soul in Asuka, and part of hers in me?"
"Yes," replied Rei. "When you touch each other, you connect to the missing part and receive sensory impressions from it."
"I don't want part of Shinji in me!"
Shinji raised an eyebrow at the outburst, and Asuka fled the table with her cheeks blazing.
Also: So far I've been managing... OK, I guess, without a beta, but I'm starting to think that having one would be nifty. Some of the gaps would probably have been shorter with someone other than my own inner critic to run things past.
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GamingPizza1998
(Verified Pizza) (Verified Cape) (Verified Case53)
- Location
- Earth
- Location
- In the depts of despair.
Is a small thing that I may be wrong so I need to check it out, but I think that Rei was a little too personal in this scene, she is someone that uses a little less the word you in a sentence. Something like this:
"When touching each other, the soul connects to its missing part and receive sensory impressions from it."
Also I think that she is not going to say she is sorry to Asuka, at least not for something is not her fault, she is simply wired a little different in that sense.
"When touching each other, the soul connects to its missing part and receive sensory impressions from it."
Also I think that she is not going to say she is sorry to Asuka, at least not for something is not her fault, she is simply wired a little different in that sense.
Yes, feed our hunger for good fanfiction. Great snippet.
HoratioVonBecker
Imperfectly Aligned
If you want you can PM me. Betareading is usually something I enjoy very much.
greensun
You shall all burn beneath my light!!!
"I, Asuka Langley Soryu, Greatest EVA Pilot In The World, am not ready for there to be a piece of a boy inside of me just yet."
"I mean, he hasn't even bought you dinner yet!" Misato said, before she howled in laughter.
"Quiet, Christmas Cake!"
"Oh you little brat!"
They then proceded to bicker amongst themselves. Much to Shinji's annoyance.
"I mean, he hasn't even bought you dinner yet!" Misato said, before she howled in laughter.
"Quiet, Christmas Cake!"
"Oh you little brat!"
They then proceded to bicker amongst themselves. Much to Shinji's annoyance.
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GeshronTyler
Kleiner Giftzwerg
Careful about those kinds of comments though, its easy to take it too far.
grommile
nasty-minded old cynic
- Location
- NERV-Mercia
- Pronouns
- Traditional/Animate
Quite so; thank you.
- Location
- National Capital Region, USA
- Location
- On a powder keg, next to a fire
I caught up with it all in one sitting and I'm surely staying for more
I like:
Also, If you still need a beta reader, I will gladly assist - although my only experience in that regard is proofreading science papers.
I like:
- A good premise
- Reasonable and interesting explanation for said premise
- Neatly done exchange of characterization
- An interesting take on Rei
Also, If you still need a beta reader, I will gladly assist - although my only experience in that regard is proofreading science papers.
Crosstalk
grommile
nasty-minded old cynic
- Location
- NERV-Mercia
- Pronouns
- Traditional/Animate
The three pilots sat around Misato's dining table, with Asuka and Shinji facing each other and Rei sat at the end of the table watching them both. Shinji's right hand was palm-down on the table, and Asuka's left was palm-down on top of it.
Shinji felt pressure against the palm of his left hand, like he was resting it on top of someone else's, and an entirely unfamiliar band of pressure around his ribcage.
Asuka felt pressure against the back and the palm of her right hand, like it was sandwiched between someone else's hand and something hard and flat.
Rei's inhuman senses showed her the transposed fragments of her fellow pilots' souls lighting up.
"This is weird," declared Asuka, flexing her right hand. "It's like I'm feeling what you're touching."
Shinji shifted slightly in his seat, and Asuka felt a bundle of sensation, mostly an uncomfortable pressure, that seemed to be coming from somewhere she didn't—
Facts connected in her brain, and with a cry of "pervert!" she slapped him with her right hand. The impact registered in her hand and her face simultaneously, making her flinch and breaking the sensory connection.
"Ow!" cried Shinji and Asuka in unison.
"What was that for?" added Shinji.
Asuka rubbed her cheek, despite the pain having vanished as soon as she stopped touching Shinji. "You were being a perv!"
"What do you mean?" interjected Rei, confused by the exchange.
Asuka and Shinji both went red, and Asuka managed to get some words out. "Look, I know what the pressure I felt means, OK?"
Rei put together the pieces of the situation in her head and nodded. She didn't entirely understand why it bothered Asuka, but it was good enough to work with. "I see. I'm sorry this upset you. It proves I was right about your status, though."
"So... there's part of my soul in Asuka, and part of hers in me?"
"Yes," replied Rei. "When you touch each other, you connect to the missing part and receive sensory impressions from it."
"I don't want part of Shinji in me!"
Shinji blinked at the outburst. Asuka stopped, looked at him, and fled the table with her cheeks blazing.
Misato looked over the front page of the report Lieutenant Ibuki had given her. The minimalist summary at the top was discouraging enough – "43% confidence" was a bad sign – but the longer summary was worse.
The man the MAGI were proposing as the shooter had been a sniper in the JGSDF who went AWOL four days before the shooting. He had no surviving family on record and had been raised in an orphanage before enlisting straight out of high school. Nothing unusual there – Japan's orphanages had been overloaded since Second Impact, and enlisting gave you better opportunities, both in service and after discharge, than waiting until you got conscripted.
His SDF disciplinary record, on the other hand, appeared to be complete bullshit; he should have been court-martialled and dishonorably discharged three times over, but he'd never received anything worse than a formal reprimand.
On top of that, he was the only survivor from his platoon following an ambush while doing COIN work in the Mekong Protectorate, yet he'd been passed fit for duty before being transferred to an undermanned platoon and rotated back to Japan. The closing line of the front page was an understatement. "Records associated with this suspect exhibit peculiarities consistent with deliberate tampering."
She looked up from the report to see Kaji standing in the doorway of her office. "Hello, you," she said.
"Good afternoon." He smiled sympathetically at her. "The look on your face says you don't like what you're reading."
"Those romances Ibuki reads make more sense than this shit."
"Sounds like something a dashing, handsome UN Inspector needs to investigate."
Some things never changed. Misato rolled her eyes and extended the report towards him. "Well, when you find one, hand him this."
He took the document off her hands and started reading the first page. After a few moments, he sighed and shook his head. "This is going to be a fun case. Are we still on for Saturday?"
"Why would I miss having fancy dinner at your expense? Of course."
"Glad to hear it." Kaji grinned. "See you later, Katsuragi."
"See you later, Kaji."
Misato wondered, as her idiot ex departed, just what she'd got herself into.
"Would you like to stay for dinner?"
Rei contemplated the invitation. On the one hand, spending more time in Shinji's company would be pleasant. On the other hand, she was not entirely comfortable with Asuka's company, and there was the question of how the Commander and Dr Akagi would react to her seeking to reinforce social bonds. "Does Asuka like vegetarian food?"
Shinji looked towards the redhead's room and sighed. "Probably not," he admitted. "And I've left it a little late to prepare two different mains."
"Then I should thank you for the invitation, but regretfully decline. It would be pleasant to dine with you another time." She reached into her school bag, pulled out the jar of chilli flakes, and shook it to settle the contents. "I need to buy more of these. I don't know how long my present state will persist."
The look on Shinji's face appeared to be one of alarm. "Is it healthy eating that much chilli?"
"Humans not used to it would suffer considerable discomfort throughout the alimentary canal." She smiled a little, in a manner she hoped was reassuring. "I do not anticipate experiencing any difficulty. Good night, Shinji. I will see you tomorrow."
Shinji felt pressure against the palm of his left hand, like he was resting it on top of someone else's, and an entirely unfamiliar band of pressure around his ribcage.
Asuka felt pressure against the back and the palm of her right hand, like it was sandwiched between someone else's hand and something hard and flat.
Rei's inhuman senses showed her the transposed fragments of her fellow pilots' souls lighting up.
"This is weird," declared Asuka, flexing her right hand. "It's like I'm feeling what you're touching."
Shinji shifted slightly in his seat, and Asuka felt a bundle of sensation, mostly an uncomfortable pressure, that seemed to be coming from somewhere she didn't—
Facts connected in her brain, and with a cry of "pervert!" she slapped him with her right hand. The impact registered in her hand and her face simultaneously, making her flinch and breaking the sensory connection.
"Ow!" cried Shinji and Asuka in unison.
"What was that for?" added Shinji.
Asuka rubbed her cheek, despite the pain having vanished as soon as she stopped touching Shinji. "You were being a perv!"
"What do you mean?" interjected Rei, confused by the exchange.
Asuka and Shinji both went red, and Asuka managed to get some words out. "Look, I know what the pressure I felt means, OK?"
Rei put together the pieces of the situation in her head and nodded. She didn't entirely understand why it bothered Asuka, but it was good enough to work with. "I see. I'm sorry this upset you. It proves I was right about your status, though."
"So... there's part of my soul in Asuka, and part of hers in me?"
"Yes," replied Rei. "When you touch each other, you connect to the missing part and receive sensory impressions from it."
"I don't want part of Shinji in me!"
Shinji blinked at the outburst. Asuka stopped, looked at him, and fled the table with her cheeks blazing.
Misato looked over the front page of the report Lieutenant Ibuki had given her. The minimalist summary at the top was discouraging enough – "43% confidence" was a bad sign – but the longer summary was worse.
The man the MAGI were proposing as the shooter had been a sniper in the JGSDF who went AWOL four days before the shooting. He had no surviving family on record and had been raised in an orphanage before enlisting straight out of high school. Nothing unusual there – Japan's orphanages had been overloaded since Second Impact, and enlisting gave you better opportunities, both in service and after discharge, than waiting until you got conscripted.
His SDF disciplinary record, on the other hand, appeared to be complete bullshit; he should have been court-martialled and dishonorably discharged three times over, but he'd never received anything worse than a formal reprimand.
On top of that, he was the only survivor from his platoon following an ambush while doing COIN work in the Mekong Protectorate, yet he'd been passed fit for duty before being transferred to an undermanned platoon and rotated back to Japan. The closing line of the front page was an understatement. "Records associated with this suspect exhibit peculiarities consistent with deliberate tampering."
She looked up from the report to see Kaji standing in the doorway of her office. "Hello, you," she said.
"Good afternoon." He smiled sympathetically at her. "The look on your face says you don't like what you're reading."
"Those romances Ibuki reads make more sense than this shit."
"Sounds like something a dashing, handsome UN Inspector needs to investigate."
Some things never changed. Misato rolled her eyes and extended the report towards him. "Well, when you find one, hand him this."
He took the document off her hands and started reading the first page. After a few moments, he sighed and shook his head. "This is going to be a fun case. Are we still on for Saturday?"
"Why would I miss having fancy dinner at your expense? Of course."
"Glad to hear it." Kaji grinned. "See you later, Katsuragi."
"See you later, Kaji."
Misato wondered, as her idiot ex departed, just what she'd got herself into.
"Would you like to stay for dinner?"
Rei contemplated the invitation. On the one hand, spending more time in Shinji's company would be pleasant. On the other hand, she was not entirely comfortable with Asuka's company, and there was the question of how the Commander and Dr Akagi would react to her seeking to reinforce social bonds. "Does Asuka like vegetarian food?"
Shinji looked towards the redhead's room and sighed. "Probably not," he admitted. "And I've left it a little late to prepare two different mains."
"Then I should thank you for the invitation, but regretfully decline. It would be pleasant to dine with you another time." She reached into her school bag, pulled out the jar of chilli flakes, and shook it to settle the contents. "I need to buy more of these. I don't know how long my present state will persist."
The look on Shinji's face appeared to be one of alarm. "Is it healthy eating that much chilli?"
"Humans not used to it would suffer considerable discomfort throughout the alimentary canal." She smiled a little, in a manner she hoped was reassuring. "I do not anticipate experiencing any difficulty. Good night, Shinji. I will see you tomorrow."
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- Location
- On a powder keg, next to a fire
Some things do not change, no matter how much soul is exchanged, eh?
So many possibilities. So many risks. So much awkwardness.
In other words, "Either the forger was barely competent, or they are giving us a finger this way."
If this was an actual anime, this line should be spoken with blurry, flowery background and soft music.
Neat piece, moving slowly but surely. Please keep it up!
grommile
nasty-minded old cynic
- Location
- NERV-Mercia
- Pronouns
- Traditional/Animate
Complete with a record scratch when Misato replies