Lord Sovereign
The Emperor of shitty fanfic
- Location
- England
We all know you're a Tsundere to Eva, says you hate it, but deep in your heart you love it...
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(AU) Evangelion: Sovereignty
- Thread starter Lord Sovereign
- Start date
Turing Decidable
𝕘𝕒𝕣𝕗
- Location
- Belgium
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Don't try to deny it, Sovvy-chan. You're just playing right into our hands.
waits for inevitable death by satellite strike
waits for inevitable death by satellite strike
Lord Sovereign
The Emperor of shitty fanfic
- Location
- England
You know...I never thought I'd get a following.
I always assumed Sovereignty would simply be dreadful, get no ratings or replies at all, and even if it did they'd be entirely negative. Because from what I can gather, this isn't quite "deep" enough for a lot of people in this fanbase. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine people might actually look at it in a positive light, and even gain avidly read and enjoy it. I apparently even have fans these days!
I mean...the emotional struggle isn't nearly as pronounced or important as it was in the original. And considering that was the heart of it...what do you people see in this that you like so much? Surely Sovereignty shits on everything Anno was on about, making it basically sacrilege...ah well, just know how immeasurably grateful I am, for you all. It...means a lot. I wouldn't write without you my peeps.
Although at the very least, a little part of me did feel I was better than the Rebuilds...but that's not saying much...
I always assumed Sovereignty would simply be dreadful, get no ratings or replies at all, and even if it did they'd be entirely negative. Because from what I can gather, this isn't quite "deep" enough for a lot of people in this fanbase. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine people might actually look at it in a positive light, and even gain avidly read and enjoy it. I apparently even have fans these days!
I mean...the emotional struggle isn't nearly as pronounced or important as it was in the original. And considering that was the heart of it...what do you people see in this that you like so much? Surely Sovereignty shits on everything Anno was on about, making it basically sacrilege...ah well, just know how immeasurably grateful I am, for you all. It...means a lot. I wouldn't write without you my peeps.
Although at the very least, a little part of me did feel I was better than the Rebuilds...but that's not saying much...
- Location
- Huezil
You know...I never thought I'd get a following.
I always assumed Sovereignty would simply be dreadful, get no ratings or replies at all, and even if it did they'd be entirely negative. Because from what I can gather, this isn't quite "deep" enough for a lot of people in this fanbase. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine people might actually look at it in a positive light, and even gain avidly read and enjoy it. I apparently even have fans these days!
I mean...the emotional struggle isn't nearly as pronounced or important as it was in the original. And considering that was the heart of it...what do you people see in this that you like so much? Surely Sovereignty shits on everything Anno was on about, making it basically sacrilege...ah well, just know how immeasurably grateful I am, for you all. It...means a lot. I wouldn't write without you my peeps.
Although at the very least, a little part of me did feel I was better than the Rebuilds...but that's not saying much...
I'm waiting for the angst, it will come, i assure you, because the characters have so much personal flaws that when things begin going south, some will break, and you're the type that won't hand wave it.
- Location
- Can't read map
Sovereign writes you up as soul trapped in mass produced EVAs, slasher smile, mental torture, "I must scream and no mouth"?
Or sets up date between you and bird made of lightning that is far away in orbit?
Well on SpaceBattles from were I first saw this, you have barely any comment or like. So were somewhat right? :/
I don't see you bad mouthing NGE, but giving it some sense and putting some flesh on bare bones of story, like mention of rest of world or angels being more then wild animal that attacks... just because we need monster of week...
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I think its mostly because quite a few people visit both spaceBattles and SV, and only follow fics on one of the two-i know i do. therefore while i like and sometimes comment here-where i saw it first, i don't pay much attention to the version on SB. others see this lack of attention, and unaware of the attention and popularity being diverted here, take it as a mark against the story.
- Location
- Huezil
Its football teams now? If so, i'm team SV
Chapter 9.3
Lord Sovereign
The Emperor of shitty fanfic
- Location
- England
Right, here we are again. Another battle between the children of Eva and Lord Netzach. 6876 words all for your pleasure, and any of my readers who are at all familiar with Dark Souls, may get a titchy bit of PTSD at some point...
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7:00pm, State of Japan, fifty miles south-west of Tokyo-3
It was a testament to NERV's technological prowess, to have their Evangelions be deployed in less than ten minutes. The various DL's or "deployment lifts", stretched out to strategically important points across a one hundred square mile radius. In a matter of seconds, the biomech monstrosities could be transported to wherever they were needed, along with their equipment, making the actual preparation take up most of the time.
Establishing a Pilot Link took about thirty seconds, bringing all functions online took another minute, and a further eight minutes or so were required to move the Evangelion onto the necessary lift.
Barely a minute ago, he'd been slotted onto the launch pad back in central, and now he found himself overlooking the coast, marked by the remains of a sunken settlement.
I wonder who lived here? Shinji thought sadly. He chastised himself, there were more pressing matters to deal with than the ghosts of Second Impact. He, Rei, Asuka, and Samuel, had taken up a defensive position made up of two lines. The first being made up of Units 02 and 03, as they were technologically superior and controlled by more talented Pilots. Behind them, were himself and Rei, being the most experienced and therefore the reserves, rear guard, or last line of defence.
Shinji hoped in his heart that he wouldn't be required for any of those roles.
Soryu-san and Meadow-san can handle this. Their Pilot Link's are far higher than mine anyway..
However, a part of his mind, buried deep with his subconscious, nagged away at him.
You saw what they were like in the simulation, and against the 7th Seraph. Overeager, arrogant, bull headed, and easily led. Spirits on high, they won't survive.
The boy had no idea why such things were plaguing him at that moment, why his heart twisted in worry as he watched the black and blue Evangelions take up their positions some sixteen hundred metres away.
They halted directly in the flooded ruins, while himself and Rei resided in the surrounding hills. He felt a great deal more at ease knowing his experienced wingman was currently holding the positron rifle, and prepared to provide covering fire.
An "Angel" as the westerners called it, was watching over them all that day, Shinji mused.
"Enemy is one click out from your location. Are you ready, Pilots?" Misato said sternly over vid link.
A chorus of "Yes ma'am", "Jawohl", and "Ryokai" responded immediately, much to the purplehead's satisfaction.
"Damn good, show the Seraphim why you don't mess with NERV." The link cut, leaving Shinji with the faces of his three colleagues. Once again, his mind dwelt upon the two gaijn, and how utterly unaware they were of what was coming. They seemed quite happy actually, exchanging snarks over "whose kill this would be."
Despite his feelings being quite neutral on them, something powerful was stirred within him, upon looking at their cheerful faces.
He felt...protective of them...
"What, Third?" Asuka's voice snapped him back into the present, as she'd noticed his mournful staring at them.
"Oh, nothing. Are...you okay down there?" He forced his expression into something more positive.
"Perfectly fine. Just sit tight and enjoy the show." Samuel flashed a grin, then refocused on the sea, seeing a geyser of water slowly rise.
Come on then beasty...
The Seraph emerged from beneath the waves, its form more familiar to Shinji than the three previous ones, but still alien. It was humanoid, but its arms were bent in a U shape, seeming rigid and inflexible, its "head" being located more towards the centre of its torso.
It looked large and cumbersome, although he well knew how deceptive size could be when it came to these things.
"First line, engage!" Misato barked, to which the black and blue Evas responded immediately.
"Dibs!" Asuka yelled, being countered by a playful "sod off!" from Samuel. Much to Shinji's surprise, he found himself groaning in exasperation, gaining a tilt of the head from Rei.
They weren't moving as one, they were racing ahead of each other, desperate to get to grips with the enemy before anyone else. The Seraph didn't seem fazed by this still impressive and intimidating sight, in fact it didn't respond at all. It just stood there, almost as if it were...analysing them. This didn't last long however, as Asuka unsheathed what appeared to be a long, sharp, staff from her back compartment and leapt into the air, whilst the aristocrat charged directly at the Seraph, thrusting his prog blade into a solid wall of orange lightening.
Still, the enemy did nothing but observe, even as its field began to fail. Then Unit 02 descended upon it from on high, staff ripping straight through its field, and then its body. To the shock of all the older hands, the Seraph was vertically bisected, only a small piece of flesh keeping the two halves held together. There was silence across the comms, even Rei leaning forward slightly, semi-surprised things had gone this well.
This was...unexpected.
Soon enough the peace was shattered however, as Asuka jubilated, whilst her colleague fumed.
"I'm going to put my statue right here! Is that the best you can do, Seraph!?" She said boisterously, grinning like a maniac and revelling in the shower of blue blood she'd created.
"God damn you, Asuka, you stole my kill!" Samuel folded his arms and slumped into his seat in something akin to a "controlled strop."
"Your kill? Who was just sitting there getting nowhere whilst I, the great Asuka Zeppelin Soryu, saved the world?"
"Fine, I get rights to the next one. I've bloody well earned it-" Shinji blocked out the rest of it, focusing his gaze on the Seraph's corpse, unable to look away.
"Well I'll be damned." He titled his head, still trying to believe the enemy was dead, whilst his subconscious remained stubborn, screaming at him that this wasn't over.
"Misato-san, something's not right..." He gently tightened his grip around his control sticks.
"I think I agree with you, Shinji-kun...Soryu-san, Meadow-san, pull back. I'm going to have Ayanami-san hit it with a positron blast, just to be sure-" All that unease was soon proven to be entirely well founded.
The Seraph divided into two separate beings.
Both were similar to the original form, but one was far larger than the other, one of its arms contorting into a giant, spiky and bony hammer, which was held by the other arm. The other Seraph was approximately two thirds of its size, possessing something akin to a genuine head on a neck and shoulders, covered in a beak like bony helm, with a feathery red crest exploding from the back of its head. A spear of orange lightening ignited in its grip.
The twin Heirs, Israfel and Isrefael, looked upon their foes, feeling the excitement of battle course through their veins.
Which one is to be yours? Israfel, the larger, boomed.
The blue one. It's arrogance is offensive to me. Isrefael noted.
Hah, the black one for me then! Good luck brother!
Likewise.
The two brothers charged. All whilst a sigh echoed throughout their heads.
...immature and impetuous as always, my Heirs... Haniel said despairingly.
The western pilots barely had time to throw themselves back from the lightening like attack, a spear of orange energy thrust into thin air where Samuel's torso had been scarcely seconds before.
Whilst his mind was busy concocting a way to deal with this new found problem, his mouth was already yelling "Can someone please explain what's going on!?" This was cut short by the much larger Seraph hurtling past its smaller counterpart, and swinging its hammer downwards whilst he was off balance. The Imperial barely had time to raise his blade to block the strike, before being nonetheless slammed to the ground.
"Line one withdraw and regroup!" Misato yelled over and over again, the situation slipping away from their control.
Samuel was in no position to obey, and Asuka couldn't hear her. The redhead was already throwing herself at Israfel. Isrefael moved in front of his brother and stabbed outwards, forcing Asuka to block with her A-T field thereby stopping her attack, keeping her in mid-air just long enough for the larger Divine to swing his great hammer round, catch her in the shoulder, and fling her across the landscape like a rag-doll.
Whilst she roared in pain, provoking anger in the aristocrat, he did manage to put her diversion to use and scramble away before he could be crushed like an insect.
Gripping his blade tightly, he backed away from the monstrosities, sweating with mental exertion as he began to realise Imperial honour might not survive this day unscathed.
Asuka came thundering back out of the crater her Eva had made, snarling and roaring with anger at these beasts who dared disrupt her victory. Or at least, that was how she rationalised her fury, not all being driven by the practically outmatched and nigh helpless blue Eva as it became cornered like a rat...
Before she could reach them however, the two Seraphim clearly sensed the danger.
Your one's got back up!
Indeed, let's deal with this one quickly!
From his free hand, Isrefael ignited what appeared to be another spear, only to heft it aloft and throw it, as if he were Zeus the ancient Greek Lord of the Sky himself. Samuel barely had time to block it with his blade and A-T field, years of cricket practice coming into use at that moment. But the sheer strength of the blast nearly knocked him off his feet, being the Pilot of the lightest Evangelion Unit. He was in a combat situation it was never designed for, and the Seraphim were capitalising on it. Emphasized by his being thrown off balance, unable to move for a few critical moments, then being smashed with that infernal hammer again.
Samuel's A-T field was all that saved him as he was brutally "brushed" aside. Unit 03 bent and twisted in ways it was never meant to, flying across the sunken settlement, landing face first into the ruins of an old hospital. His blade left half a kilometre behind him, as the boy lost consciousness due to banging his head savagely.
The twin Heirs had little time to enjoy this small victory, as Unit 02 was upon them in a heartbeat, its pilot screaming like a Valkyrie. The initial swipe of her prog knives didn't even make contact with their A-T fields as they automatically side stepped, according to instincts honed after thousands of years of battle.
Asuka rolled as she landed, a spear and a hammer landing where she'd just been seconds before, her own instincts being highly attuned to a combat situation. As a pilot, as a warrior, she was sublime. Swipes, thrusts, and smashes, were things she weaved around like water...but only just. For even the best would struggle against the twin Heirs, they whose souls were so close and attuned to one another, they acted almost as one. Nevertheless, her blades did impact their fields, and landed the occasional slight cut when she managed to push her field through a chink in theirs.
"Pilot Soryu, I am ordering you to withdraw!" Misato voice actually crackled due to the sheer volume of her frustration. Of course, the redhead paid it no mind.
"I'd rather die than retreat!" She snapped back, her own mind racing through one thought over and over again.
I can't lose, I can't lose, I can't lose...
"Damn it!" Misato snarled, her fist clenching in anger. She sincerely regretted putting those two in the front line now, these two whilst talented Pilots who couldn't show a hint of team work or obedience. And now, this was interfering with her recently made plan.
"Ayanami-san, the moment you get a clear shot you take it. Pin them in place, whilst Shinji-kun gets Meadow-san and Soryu-san out of there. Do you understand?"
"Ryokai." Was the quiet response.
"Shinji-kun, move on my command." Misato ordered.
"Ryokai!" Shinji acknowledged.
The female soldier noted the instantaneous response of the two with some satisfaction, then focused on the ongoing battle from deep within NERV Central. Quickly glancing at Makoto, she gave another order.
"Are the JSA ready?"
"Hai, Lieutenant Colonel. It took them a couple of minutes but they're ready to advance when you give the order...as per General Motichka's allowance..." He winced slightly upon remembering the brief argument between the NERV officer and the Japanese General over who was to command the JSA in such operations. It had lasted a minute or so, before Chiso yielded and gave temporary command of the forces stationed in and around the capital to Misato.
The purplehead had wanted to be a soldier for as long as she could remember, being raised on action films and such that her parents would use to amuse her for a while. Such things had been one of the few constants during their relationship's breakdown and divorce, giving the at the time twelve year old girl a good deal of comfort. Perhaps it was from that, the desire to make something of her life, to prove herself in the most harrowing of situations, to be a father to her men, to be better than the father who abandoned her, came from.
At least...until that awful day in Antarctica...
Bringing her mind back to the present, she nodded and returned her gaze to the holographic display.
Meadow-san is unconscious, Soryu-san won't follow orders, and the only proficient pilots I have can't do anything! Spirits, why must you make my life so difficult!?
She comforted herself however. Soon enough, Asuka would probably slip up and get smacked across the battlefield. Then they could at least deal some heavy damage to the enemy, the likelihood of killing them not at all being out of the question.
Just be ready you two...
Asuka continued to fight for a further two minutes, never once considering even the faintest suggestion of defeat or retreat, in fact the thing she fought most was turning her gaze upon the battered and bludgeoned Imperial Eva...
But then, she made a mistake. After ducking beneath a hammer blow, she'd lashed out at the smaller one, which leaned backwards on its left leg before propelling itself forward, spear driving straight through weakened by constant contact A-T field, and puncturing a good few metres of her armour.
She howled in pain as something akin to electricity coursed through the Eva and therefore herself. For a few moments she was paralysed, as was Isrefael's intent, allowing Israfel to take advantage of his younger brother's strike. The hammer impacted the Eva's black jaw, causing it to snap back as the monster was thrown straight off its feet and flat onto its back. Asuka herself was dazed, desperately trying to fight off the urge to close her eyes and yield to unconsciousness.
Nein verdammut! If I do that I'm dead!
Before they could finish her off however, the brothers noticed a new threat. One which hurtled towards them in an arc of positron energy that had slain their elder sister with one blow some months before. They dived in opposite directions, rolling and regaining balance with utter grace as the ground upon which they stood was vaporised.
But Israfel's knee buckled slightly...well, what was left of his knee.
Brother, are you alright!? Isrefael gave a panicked glance at the hissing in pain Divine.
Up...heh...on that...heh...hill...kill it...
The younger Divine complied without hesitation, thundering forwards at lightening speed, past the dazed Unit 02 and directly at Unit 00.
Rei fired again, utterly annihilating yet more picturesque Japanese country side, but Isrefael darted and pirouetted around these blasts perfectly, closing the distance between the two at an alarming rate. Shinji found himself on edge, ready to move in between them if necessary before Misato gave her orders.
"Shinji-kun, engage! Do not let that thing near the positron rifle. Ayanami-san, concentrate fire on the big one, don't let it finish off Units 02 and 03!"
"Ryokai!" They responded immediately, and set to work.
The albino realigned the targeting pip on her hud, fixing it on the partially regenerated but still lumbering Divine. She ignored the swiftly incoming smaller Seraph, as she'd been ordered to, and obeyed without question. Although, another thought gave her surprising comfort.
Ikari-kun is with me. He will protect me...
Her assertion was proven correct, as the Seraph had to roll out of Unit 01's charge, darting backwards to avoid a mighty punch. Whilst her brother kept it occupied, Rei closed her finger around her control stick's trigger, and fired upon the other Seraph, whom had been lumbering towards the helpless Unit 02. Once again, it sensed the danger, and used its own A-T field to blast itself away from where the positron beam would strike, just a few dozen metres from where Asuka was slowly regaining control of her Eva and herself.
I swear, if you've even scratched the paint...
With great effort she hauled herself up, her head still feeling quite dizzy from the whole "being stabbed with lightening and hit with a really large hammer" thing. Both of her prog knives had been scattered across the battlefield, far out of reach at this moment, making her options in continuing the engagement limited. But the redhead had never, nor would she ever be, someone who just "gave up."
Asuka flexed her great black hands, curling them into fists which could pound through ten metre thick sheets of titanium with ease. She was within a hundred and sixty metre tall killing machine, one that put fear into the hearts of the gods, and she would not be denied her deserved triumph. However, her ascent was incredibly slow, stars still being present in her eyes as a result of taking a blow to the chin that would have shattered mountains. All whilst being utterly unaware the only reason she was still alive, was because of Rei keeping Israfel from finishing her off.
Meanwhile, its smaller sibling felt his blood boil in anger upon seeing the purple and white monster.
This was it, what slew Sachiel, Shamshel and Ramiel. Now, their souls would have vengeance. As would Gaghiel when the two could get round to the black and blue ones.
By the gods, no other shall die by your hand purple devil!
Isrefael charged his opponent, his smaller and lighter form making him much faster than Unit 01, which was quite a new experience for Shinji. Having a foe who lacked his strength but utterly surpassed his speed was bizarre, the fact that it basically forced him to be more stationary being somewhat welcome. It meant he only had to focus on one thing.
He blocked the Seraph's strike with his A-T field, angling it in such a manner the spear slid off, with its wielder having to dart backwards from an incoming punch, using its own field to block the strike and push itself back. It paced around him for a few moments, like a predatory animal, a master in the art of death, looking for any weakness.
It suddenly lunged forward, attempting to stab into Shinji's leg, only for the much larger Eva to leap forward and slam into it with its own body weight. Knocking the foe clean off its feet, the boy tried to stab down with his newly unsheathed prog knife, before screaming in pain as the spear went into his side.
A typhoon of energy threw him off, with the Seraph trying to get to its feet.
I can't give it an inch!
In a few moments, something akin to a plan formed in Shinji's mind. His enemy had positioned itself in such a way, that its back faced the sea where Unit 02 and 03 resided, and the unfortunate larger Seraph being bombarded by positron fire.
Gah...will you just...piss off!?
If I can just get it down there...I can keep them away from Rei and help evacuate the other two...holy shit, that isn't a bad plan...
Putting it into action, he thundered forward, despite the pain of his internal organs sizzling. He caught the Seraph as it was still trying to regain its balance, causing them both to tumble over each other down the hill, permanently deforming and defacing the picturesque Japanese country side.
"Misato-san, I'm going to try and get them out! Ayanami-chan, cover me!" He barked into his vid link as they reached the bottom of the hill, and their rolling stopped.
"Alright, Shinji-kun, good luck! Ayanami-san, keep up the pressure, like he said." Misato accepted her charge's plan.
"Ryokai, Lieutenant Colonel." Rei acknowledged.
With Isrefael dazed for a few critical minutes, Shinji urged himself over to Unit 02's side, getting down on knee as he tried to take one of its black arms over its shoulder.
"Soryu-san, are you alright?" He said, concerned. All he gained for his trouble was the black Eva shaking him off as its Pilot growled.
"I don't need your help, Third." She snarled, her dizziness finally fading away.
"Oh, because you've been doing so brilliantly without it! We've been ordered to retreat, and that's what we're going to do!" He snapped back, his patience with these gaijn being worn away more and more as time went past.
"Then retreat you coward. I will not be defeated...not by anything-" Asuka kept trying to brush him off.
At that moment, Shinji lost his temper. Firmly grasping the shoulders of Unit 02, he forced it to look at his own searing gaze.
"If you stay here, you die..." He then glanced at the still knocked out Unit 03, before looking back at her.
"Both of you."
The two held eye contact for a few moments, until Unit 02's four eyes, and those of its Pilot, lowered in something akin to defeat.
"Damn it." Its pilot hissed.
Never being one for enjoying victory, Shinji accepted this and hauled Asuka off the ground, taking a quick glance at the smaller Seraph, still weakly trying to rise to its feet, only to keep falling back down.
"Lieutenant Colonel, I'm almost out of ammunition for the rifle. I have three shots left." Rei relayed.
"Damn it...hoped it would last a bit longer...take out the smaller one."
"Ryokai."
The albino began the painstakingly slow readjustment of the heavy rifle, her hud lining up an ideal trajectory on Isrefael. It had been almost beyond belief how flexible and fast the larger Seraph could be, quite artfully throwing itself out of her fire's way at just the right time. It would take a minute to readjust, but clearly the smaller Seraph wouldn't be getting up anytime soon.
Meanwhile, Shinji and Asuka stood before Israfel, finally free from bombardment, who looked upon them with no small amount of frustration in his black eyes.
Oh, have you decided to fight me with some degree of honour now!?
The ground shook as he charged, the desire to splatter their brains across the countryside being too much to resist for the large Divine.
"I'll take this one, you get Meadow-san!" Shinji barked at his German colleague, before countering the Seraph's charge, sliding under the strike of its hammer as their fields flared upon making contact with one another.
Asuka, fought against her lust for combat, darting around the vicious melee and making straight for her incapacitated colleague, whose vid link showed him still sleeping like a baby.
"Sam, wake up!" She snapped, shaking the blue Evangelion for added effect. Gaining absolutely nothing in response.
"Ugh, that was just a tap!" She rolled her eyes in annoyance, throwing the a hundred and sixty metre long monster over her back. The weight was one of the heaviest she'd ever lifted, but it was not nearly enough to bend her. She couldn't move as fast, but still due to its sheer size the Eva moved faster than any other living creature. Well, save for the Seraphim...
Whenever the hammer hit the ground, massive craters were forged as the earth itself shook from the blow. Shinji knew he'd be pulverised if he stayed still for too long, however his goal was not to kill this thing, but delay it. To buy precious time for the other two to get clear.
All he could really do was dodge, there was no chance of blocking the enemy's strike, and there was little chance that it would even let him get close enough to jab it with his tiny prog knife. Meanwhile, Israfel was continuously rumbling to himself.
Just attack me, or stay still...gah, where is Isrefael when you need him!?
Roughly a league ahead of you on that beach if you wish to know. He's somewhat dazed...
Haniel answered, his own conversation with the weaker Divine Heir not being very enlightening.
What? After a little fall like that? Honestly we wrestled each other in our youth far more roughly.
He caught a glimpse of his brother quietly lying by the sea, as he fought off his chronic dizziness.
As helpless as he was in the womb...my poor brother...oh gods. The realisation suddenly struck Israfel harder than what he imagined would be a fist in the face from father.
The enemy had stopped shooting with their powerful weapon for a while now, meaning two things. That they had run out of ammunition...or had changed target.
The Divine Heir charged, Shinji swerving around him with an ease brought only from experience. What he didn't expect was for his foe to continue barrelling past him towards its smaller counterpart, snatching up the nigh helpless creature and throwing them both out of the Positron rifle's final blast. The area where they'd been, was now nought but a charred and blackened ruin. At great personal risk to itself, the larger Seraph had saved its comrade, and was now tenderly cradling it, as if trying to wake it up.
The boy did not dwell on this however. As a soldier, you had to attend to such things before or after battle, and never during it. Hence why, the moment he had an opening to withdraw, Shinji took it without question.
"Everyone get to the lifts, they're distracted!" He roared over the comms, with Misato commanding that said lifts be prepared for their arrival.
Asuka and Samuel had just reached the crest of the hill, right where Rei was as she gently retrieved the positron rifle. In approximately ten seconds, Shinji had crossed the ground between him and his squad mates, not daring to look back as he knew in his heart the Seraphim were now in pursuit.
In that respect he was correct.
They were not sprinting, just murderously pacing towards their enemy, clearly enjoying the fear they put into their enemy's hearts. But even then, it was far too late for the Twin Heirs to catch their prey. And they knew it.
"We're clear!" Shinji barked. The four Evas, one being held over another's shoulder, engaged in something akin to a sprinting match, having now crested the hill, as the armoured forces of the JSA rumbled past them and assumed position on the ridge, five Susanoos hovering above them. With an almighty roar, they let loose their war song upon the enemy who threatened their homeland, with just as much success as they did before. But this was only to buy time for something else...
The two Seraphim watched their prey scramble away from them in a mad dash to safety, as the much weaker forces of the Vooren engaged with reckless courage. This was a victory, a first step towards the reclamation of Ejrod, the restoration of their people's honour, and the avenging of their siblings. Even as three N2 mines hurtled towards them, Israfel and Isrefael were not troubled. For they had achieved nothing less than the utter humiliation of the enemy. Now...soon...they had to see to their ruin.
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7:45pm, NERV Central, briefing room
Upon the digital board, the slide show continued to play, images of the two freshly arrived Evas having what could be described as "the snot kicked out of them."
The four Pilots had taken a position in front of the board, Samuel and Rei having assumed a military stance, legs snapped together, backs straight, arms held behind their backs. Asuka sat on a foldable chair, looking both thoughtful and irritated, whilst Shinji leaned against the wall, his expression disapproving, his arms folded.
He didn't feel "better" than them, nor was he regretful that they were still alive. But frustration had almost completely overtaken his heart.
They'd outnumbered the enemy two to one, and these baka had utterly lost. They would have died, without question, where he and Rei not present. In some ways it was as Samuel said, he was militia. Called up at a moment's notice to be used as cannon fodder until the regulars arrived. But, unlike these well trained, well equipped colleagues of theirs, Shinji and Rei had one very crucial thing which the Imperial and the German didn't. Something which, in a way, made them totally outrank the "rookies."
Experience.
"So..." Vice Commander Fuyutsuki began with a sigh. Around him stood the other superior officers of NERV, or "Section 1's." The other three Sub Commanders stood around him, gathered together in this small place for a very important session. In the corner of course, was UNIS agent Ryoji Kaji, who looked faintly bemused by the whole situation. He was there to carry out his official purpose of reporting back to the United Nations on NERV's doings.
"Despite seeing what occurred from the command bridge, I would very much like to hear your perspective on the battle." The old man said thoughtfully, and understandingly. For whilst this was a gargantuan issue, let it never be said that he was unfair. Hence why most of NERV's staff far preferred him over Gendo.
The four children were quiet for a while, until Rei spoke up in her usual calm and controlled demeanor.
"We engaged the enemy in a two line formation. As Pilots Soryu and Meadow were considered superior for straight up combat, they were placed ahead of myself and Ikari-kun. The enemy proceeded to...divide-" She took a quick look at the image which displayed the Seraph splitting into two separate entities, as if she were still struggling to believe it.
"-and overpowered both Units 02 and 03. Therefore myself and Ikari-kun were ordered to support and cover a retreat. As we are all standing here without grievous injury, I think the operation was a resounding success, although...it may have been an easier task if my colleagues had obeyed orders-"
From his corner of the room, Shinji could sense Asuka's rage boil over as she abruptly stood up and pointed a finger at the albino.
"Shut up, dummkopf, I could have taken them, I didn't need your help-"
"Considering you were seconds away from death, Soryu-san, I highly doubt it. Continue, Ayanami-san." Kozo silenced her with the raising of his hand, allowing Rei to proceed whilst Samuel glared at her with his cold blue eyes.
"Today the enemy operated as a unit, and we did not. I believe that is the primary cause of our defeat." The blue haired girl bowed her head slightly.
"Do you concur with your colleague's assessment, Ikari-san?" The old man turned his gaze upon Shinji, who responded immediately.
"I do, Vice Commander." He confirmed.
Despite his words, the ire of the two foreigners was still fixed upon the clone, with Samuel's fists trembling slightly, muttering "barbarian" under his breath, and Asuka fixing her with a glare.
"Oh it'll be a cold day in hell before I let a doll lecture me!" She snarled.
Shinji's previously distant gaze snapped up, sheer, bottomless fury in his heart.
"What did you just call her!?" He roared.
"Enough!" Kozo's voice took on a surprising sternness, causing total silence to descend upon the room.
"Now that I have your attention, know this. The JSA's N2 strike has badly damaged the enemy, but make no mistake they will recover. They will be knocking on our door in about a week's time, I hope by then you might actually start treating this situation as adults, not children stroking their egos." Harshness filtered into that old voice.
"You dare speak to a member of the Imperial nobility in such a manner?" The blonde boy's eyebrows narrowed, as he did not take too kindly to being called a "child." Not when he'd worked so hard, for so very long, to shake off that title. Especially after being brushed aside and having to be carried off the field by someone that was once regarded as a possible enemy of the Empire.
Kozo blinked, disapprovingly.
"Meadow-san, in the words of your father, whom I have only just spoken to, you are a soldier, act like one."
Any response Samuel had died in his throat at those words, utter shame and guilt overcoming all of his other senses. He quietened his tongue, and bowed his head in submission.
The old man massaged his eyebrows for a few moments before finishing the sorry display.
"You have approximately seven days to get whatever issues you have with one another straightened out. Neither myself, nor the Commander, will tolerate any more of this petulance. Mankind's survival is at stake...your quests for glory come a long way behind that. Do I make myself clear?"
There was a chorus of "Hai" from Shinji, Asuka, and Rei, with of course Samuel giving a curt "Yes, sir."
Accepting what he could get, Kozo nodded.
"Dismissed."
The four children filed out of the room, leaving only the NERV Command staff and the UNIS Agent.
"Any suggestions?" His old gravelly voice inquired.
Misato immediately responded with drill like precision. It had come to her charge's surprise to learn she was actually a Sub Commander, specifically that of Section 3, of armed security.
"Vice Commander, I would recommend extensive team building exercises. They need to work as a unit if we're going to get through this." She put bluntly.
"Seconded. I saw a few too many squads get wiped out by the Chinese because of things like that." Shiro added.
Kozo looked back and forth between the two seasoned soldiers, accepting their advice.
I suppose we have no other choice...team building...SEELE will not take this lightly. I need to get Ikari back here to smooth things over with them.
It was irritating how often the Supreme Commander had to disappear, but it was necessary. On this particular day, he'd been in talks with Kotai Industries, attempting to acquire some resources from them. The old man did find himself a little bothered by the situation. Granted, they couldn't lose, the scrolls had stated as much. But he really did wish these children wouldn't make things any more difficult than they had to, and possibly prove a prophecy as old as the sands wrong through their immaturity.
Although considering their histories...that sort of behaviour is hardly surprising. He grimly reminded himself. But then, the Vice Commander cheered himself up, reckoning he had an idea which would most certainly help the "team building" in the short term...as for long term, well...the furthest NERV thought ahead was December 31st 2017, so it wasn't overly relevant. Besides, as according to the scenario, fixing some personal problems for now but cause the development of later ones could be useful...
"Very well then, Katsuragi-san, I leave our newcomers in your hands..." He couldn't help but grin slightly as his mind went over all the necessary paper work and hologram conversations that needed doing for what was about to be done.
Misato looked confused for a moment, then her brown eyes widened. Ritsuko let out a loud "Hah!" whilst a few others sniggered.
"Vice Commander...you can't be serious...in my house?"
--------------------------------
The two gaijn chattered at the same volume they'd had upon coming in to the cages over an hour ago. But now, instead of jovial bragging, there was only grumblings of frustration and anger. All of which clawed down Shinji's spine, his own anger slowly building up to a boiling point. Rei easily recognized this, as she'd never seen the child of her progenitor behave in such a way, as if he wanted to strike something, anything.
It...frightened her.
However, Shinji was among those who could somewhat read her body language, and he felt some pangs of guilt at, what was to him, her clear discomfort.
"I'm alright, Ayanami-chan." He offered quietly.
"Have Pilots Meadow and Soryu made you angry?" She asked, something akin to timidness in her voice.
"We'll talk about it later."
Behind them, Asuka continued to fume whilst her friend did something similar, except he reflected a little more on his actions. Both her fists were balled as the Vice Commander's words cut through her mind like a knife through butter.
I'm not a child! I'm an elite, the best of the best! I had everything under control, I didn't need any help, I don't need anyone's help!
"I don't understand, I am an Eva Pilot elite. How the hell did I lose to a cheap trick like that?" She growled before glaring at Samuel.
"How the hell did we lose? Gott Verdammut, Sam, we always come out on top in combat sims, we have the highest synch ratios, so how did those stupid, brainless, hulking animals-"
The Imperial was not quite in the mood to respond, although he did agree with her to some extent.
I've been taught to serve for as long as I can remember. I studied at bloody Sandhurst, under some of the finest military minds in the Empire, and I still got crushed more easily than we did the French! Damn it...that shouldn't have happened...what a failure I am...
Before they knew it, Shinji had swung round to face them, directly barring their way, his patience finally worn out with the both of them. His own feelings towards himself evaporated for these few moments, their behaviour was endangering thousands of lives and it needed to be nipped in the bud right here and now.
"First thing, if you actually think Seraphim aren't anything more than dumb animals, then you're fools. They are smart, they are cunning, and they will do anything to kill you." His eyebrows narrowed, utter dissatisfaction in them.
"Don't tell me how to Pilot my Eva, Third. I've been doing it since you were still in your ficking diapers-" Asuka was in the process of snarling, before the older and more experienced boy cut her off, his tone slightly louder than hers.
"You're good, Soryu-san, I'll give you that. But you aren't a soldier, not by a long shot. From now, you listen to what others say. You obey orders, your shallow pride be damned. Maybe then, you might actually have a chance of living through this." Where he not so irritated and infuriated, Shinji may have noticed how the redhead's expression had frozen, as if unaware of what to say or do in the face of his scolding.
As if she were a rabbit in the headlights.
"From now on, I expect better from both of you." He gave a quick glare at the taller Imperial. "If you're elite, then you should be capable of actually engaging the enemy without me and Ayanami-chan having to haul you out of the fire. This isn't a damned game or simulation...this is war. You lose, you die, it's that simple. I hope you might understand that someday." Finished with his dressing down, he walked away, both of his hands balled into fists.
The Imperial and the German watched him storm off, with Rei swiftly following her progenitor's child. Samuel felt the more experienced yet younger boy's words further etch themselves into his head, provoking a sense of frustration and...inadequacy.
To be lectured by a Barbarian...but he's right. I have failed the Empire today. I must not do so again...for the sake of the homeland.
Asuka meanwhile had overcome her shock, and turned it into a feeling all too familiar to her.
Anger.
"Just who the holle put you in charge dummkopf!?" She screamed after his disappearing back, gaining nothing in response. She and her colleague stood in the corridor, alone and ignored, as if they were petulant children.
--------------------------------------
7:00pm, State of Japan, fifty miles south-west of Tokyo-3
It was a testament to NERV's technological prowess, to have their Evangelions be deployed in less than ten minutes. The various DL's or "deployment lifts", stretched out to strategically important points across a one hundred square mile radius. In a matter of seconds, the biomech monstrosities could be transported to wherever they were needed, along with their equipment, making the actual preparation take up most of the time.
Establishing a Pilot Link took about thirty seconds, bringing all functions online took another minute, and a further eight minutes or so were required to move the Evangelion onto the necessary lift.
Barely a minute ago, he'd been slotted onto the launch pad back in central, and now he found himself overlooking the coast, marked by the remains of a sunken settlement.
I wonder who lived here? Shinji thought sadly. He chastised himself, there were more pressing matters to deal with than the ghosts of Second Impact. He, Rei, Asuka, and Samuel, had taken up a defensive position made up of two lines. The first being made up of Units 02 and 03, as they were technologically superior and controlled by more talented Pilots. Behind them, were himself and Rei, being the most experienced and therefore the reserves, rear guard, or last line of defence.
Shinji hoped in his heart that he wouldn't be required for any of those roles.
Soryu-san and Meadow-san can handle this. Their Pilot Link's are far higher than mine anyway..
However, a part of his mind, buried deep with his subconscious, nagged away at him.
You saw what they were like in the simulation, and against the 7th Seraph. Overeager, arrogant, bull headed, and easily led. Spirits on high, they won't survive.
The boy had no idea why such things were plaguing him at that moment, why his heart twisted in worry as he watched the black and blue Evangelions take up their positions some sixteen hundred metres away.
They halted directly in the flooded ruins, while himself and Rei resided in the surrounding hills. He felt a great deal more at ease knowing his experienced wingman was currently holding the positron rifle, and prepared to provide covering fire.
An "Angel" as the westerners called it, was watching over them all that day, Shinji mused.
"Enemy is one click out from your location. Are you ready, Pilots?" Misato said sternly over vid link.
A chorus of "Yes ma'am", "Jawohl", and "Ryokai" responded immediately, much to the purplehead's satisfaction.
"Damn good, show the Seraphim why you don't mess with NERV." The link cut, leaving Shinji with the faces of his three colleagues. Once again, his mind dwelt upon the two gaijn, and how utterly unaware they were of what was coming. They seemed quite happy actually, exchanging snarks over "whose kill this would be."
Despite his feelings being quite neutral on them, something powerful was stirred within him, upon looking at their cheerful faces.
He felt...protective of them...
"What, Third?" Asuka's voice snapped him back into the present, as she'd noticed his mournful staring at them.
"Oh, nothing. Are...you okay down there?" He forced his expression into something more positive.
"Perfectly fine. Just sit tight and enjoy the show." Samuel flashed a grin, then refocused on the sea, seeing a geyser of water slowly rise.
Come on then beasty...
The Seraph emerged from beneath the waves, its form more familiar to Shinji than the three previous ones, but still alien. It was humanoid, but its arms were bent in a U shape, seeming rigid and inflexible, its "head" being located more towards the centre of its torso.
It looked large and cumbersome, although he well knew how deceptive size could be when it came to these things.
"First line, engage!" Misato barked, to which the black and blue Evas responded immediately.
"Dibs!" Asuka yelled, being countered by a playful "sod off!" from Samuel. Much to Shinji's surprise, he found himself groaning in exasperation, gaining a tilt of the head from Rei.
They weren't moving as one, they were racing ahead of each other, desperate to get to grips with the enemy before anyone else. The Seraph didn't seem fazed by this still impressive and intimidating sight, in fact it didn't respond at all. It just stood there, almost as if it were...analysing them. This didn't last long however, as Asuka unsheathed what appeared to be a long, sharp, staff from her back compartment and leapt into the air, whilst the aristocrat charged directly at the Seraph, thrusting his prog blade into a solid wall of orange lightening.
Still, the enemy did nothing but observe, even as its field began to fail. Then Unit 02 descended upon it from on high, staff ripping straight through its field, and then its body. To the shock of all the older hands, the Seraph was vertically bisected, only a small piece of flesh keeping the two halves held together. There was silence across the comms, even Rei leaning forward slightly, semi-surprised things had gone this well.
This was...unexpected.
Soon enough the peace was shattered however, as Asuka jubilated, whilst her colleague fumed.
"I'm going to put my statue right here! Is that the best you can do, Seraph!?" She said boisterously, grinning like a maniac and revelling in the shower of blue blood she'd created.
"God damn you, Asuka, you stole my kill!" Samuel folded his arms and slumped into his seat in something akin to a "controlled strop."
"Your kill? Who was just sitting there getting nowhere whilst I, the great Asuka Zeppelin Soryu, saved the world?"
"Fine, I get rights to the next one. I've bloody well earned it-" Shinji blocked out the rest of it, focusing his gaze on the Seraph's corpse, unable to look away.
"Well I'll be damned." He titled his head, still trying to believe the enemy was dead, whilst his subconscious remained stubborn, screaming at him that this wasn't over.
"Misato-san, something's not right..." He gently tightened his grip around his control sticks.
"I think I agree with you, Shinji-kun...Soryu-san, Meadow-san, pull back. I'm going to have Ayanami-san hit it with a positron blast, just to be sure-" All that unease was soon proven to be entirely well founded.
The Seraph divided into two separate beings.
Both were similar to the original form, but one was far larger than the other, one of its arms contorting into a giant, spiky and bony hammer, which was held by the other arm. The other Seraph was approximately two thirds of its size, possessing something akin to a genuine head on a neck and shoulders, covered in a beak like bony helm, with a feathery red crest exploding from the back of its head. A spear of orange lightening ignited in its grip.
The twin Heirs, Israfel and Isrefael, looked upon their foes, feeling the excitement of battle course through their veins.
Which one is to be yours? Israfel, the larger, boomed.
The blue one. It's arrogance is offensive to me. Isrefael noted.
Hah, the black one for me then! Good luck brother!
Likewise.
The two brothers charged. All whilst a sigh echoed throughout their heads.
...immature and impetuous as always, my Heirs... Haniel said despairingly.
The western pilots barely had time to throw themselves back from the lightening like attack, a spear of orange energy thrust into thin air where Samuel's torso had been scarcely seconds before.
Whilst his mind was busy concocting a way to deal with this new found problem, his mouth was already yelling "Can someone please explain what's going on!?" This was cut short by the much larger Seraph hurtling past its smaller counterpart, and swinging its hammer downwards whilst he was off balance. The Imperial barely had time to raise his blade to block the strike, before being nonetheless slammed to the ground.
"Line one withdraw and regroup!" Misato yelled over and over again, the situation slipping away from their control.
Samuel was in no position to obey, and Asuka couldn't hear her. The redhead was already throwing herself at Israfel. Isrefael moved in front of his brother and stabbed outwards, forcing Asuka to block with her A-T field thereby stopping her attack, keeping her in mid-air just long enough for the larger Divine to swing his great hammer round, catch her in the shoulder, and fling her across the landscape like a rag-doll.
Whilst she roared in pain, provoking anger in the aristocrat, he did manage to put her diversion to use and scramble away before he could be crushed like an insect.
Gripping his blade tightly, he backed away from the monstrosities, sweating with mental exertion as he began to realise Imperial honour might not survive this day unscathed.
Asuka came thundering back out of the crater her Eva had made, snarling and roaring with anger at these beasts who dared disrupt her victory. Or at least, that was how she rationalised her fury, not all being driven by the practically outmatched and nigh helpless blue Eva as it became cornered like a rat...
Before she could reach them however, the two Seraphim clearly sensed the danger.
Your one's got back up!
Indeed, let's deal with this one quickly!
From his free hand, Isrefael ignited what appeared to be another spear, only to heft it aloft and throw it, as if he were Zeus the ancient Greek Lord of the Sky himself. Samuel barely had time to block it with his blade and A-T field, years of cricket practice coming into use at that moment. But the sheer strength of the blast nearly knocked him off his feet, being the Pilot of the lightest Evangelion Unit. He was in a combat situation it was never designed for, and the Seraphim were capitalising on it. Emphasized by his being thrown off balance, unable to move for a few critical moments, then being smashed with that infernal hammer again.
Samuel's A-T field was all that saved him as he was brutally "brushed" aside. Unit 03 bent and twisted in ways it was never meant to, flying across the sunken settlement, landing face first into the ruins of an old hospital. His blade left half a kilometre behind him, as the boy lost consciousness due to banging his head savagely.
The twin Heirs had little time to enjoy this small victory, as Unit 02 was upon them in a heartbeat, its pilot screaming like a Valkyrie. The initial swipe of her prog knives didn't even make contact with their A-T fields as they automatically side stepped, according to instincts honed after thousands of years of battle.
Asuka rolled as she landed, a spear and a hammer landing where she'd just been seconds before, her own instincts being highly attuned to a combat situation. As a pilot, as a warrior, she was sublime. Swipes, thrusts, and smashes, were things she weaved around like water...but only just. For even the best would struggle against the twin Heirs, they whose souls were so close and attuned to one another, they acted almost as one. Nevertheless, her blades did impact their fields, and landed the occasional slight cut when she managed to push her field through a chink in theirs.
"Pilot Soryu, I am ordering you to withdraw!" Misato voice actually crackled due to the sheer volume of her frustration. Of course, the redhead paid it no mind.
"I'd rather die than retreat!" She snapped back, her own mind racing through one thought over and over again.
I can't lose, I can't lose, I can't lose...
"Damn it!" Misato snarled, her fist clenching in anger. She sincerely regretted putting those two in the front line now, these two whilst talented Pilots who couldn't show a hint of team work or obedience. And now, this was interfering with her recently made plan.
"Ayanami-san, the moment you get a clear shot you take it. Pin them in place, whilst Shinji-kun gets Meadow-san and Soryu-san out of there. Do you understand?"
"Ryokai." Was the quiet response.
"Shinji-kun, move on my command." Misato ordered.
"Ryokai!" Shinji acknowledged.
The female soldier noted the instantaneous response of the two with some satisfaction, then focused on the ongoing battle from deep within NERV Central. Quickly glancing at Makoto, she gave another order.
"Are the JSA ready?"
"Hai, Lieutenant Colonel. It took them a couple of minutes but they're ready to advance when you give the order...as per General Motichka's allowance..." He winced slightly upon remembering the brief argument between the NERV officer and the Japanese General over who was to command the JSA in such operations. It had lasted a minute or so, before Chiso yielded and gave temporary command of the forces stationed in and around the capital to Misato.
The purplehead had wanted to be a soldier for as long as she could remember, being raised on action films and such that her parents would use to amuse her for a while. Such things had been one of the few constants during their relationship's breakdown and divorce, giving the at the time twelve year old girl a good deal of comfort. Perhaps it was from that, the desire to make something of her life, to prove herself in the most harrowing of situations, to be a father to her men, to be better than the father who abandoned her, came from.
At least...until that awful day in Antarctica...
Bringing her mind back to the present, she nodded and returned her gaze to the holographic display.
Meadow-san is unconscious, Soryu-san won't follow orders, and the only proficient pilots I have can't do anything! Spirits, why must you make my life so difficult!?
She comforted herself however. Soon enough, Asuka would probably slip up and get smacked across the battlefield. Then they could at least deal some heavy damage to the enemy, the likelihood of killing them not at all being out of the question.
Just be ready you two...
Asuka continued to fight for a further two minutes, never once considering even the faintest suggestion of defeat or retreat, in fact the thing she fought most was turning her gaze upon the battered and bludgeoned Imperial Eva...
But then, she made a mistake. After ducking beneath a hammer blow, she'd lashed out at the smaller one, which leaned backwards on its left leg before propelling itself forward, spear driving straight through weakened by constant contact A-T field, and puncturing a good few metres of her armour.
She howled in pain as something akin to electricity coursed through the Eva and therefore herself. For a few moments she was paralysed, as was Isrefael's intent, allowing Israfel to take advantage of his younger brother's strike. The hammer impacted the Eva's black jaw, causing it to snap back as the monster was thrown straight off its feet and flat onto its back. Asuka herself was dazed, desperately trying to fight off the urge to close her eyes and yield to unconsciousness.
Nein verdammut! If I do that I'm dead!
Before they could finish her off however, the brothers noticed a new threat. One which hurtled towards them in an arc of positron energy that had slain their elder sister with one blow some months before. They dived in opposite directions, rolling and regaining balance with utter grace as the ground upon which they stood was vaporised.
But Israfel's knee buckled slightly...well, what was left of his knee.
Brother, are you alright!? Isrefael gave a panicked glance at the hissing in pain Divine.
Up...heh...on that...heh...hill...kill it...
The younger Divine complied without hesitation, thundering forwards at lightening speed, past the dazed Unit 02 and directly at Unit 00.
Rei fired again, utterly annihilating yet more picturesque Japanese country side, but Isrefael darted and pirouetted around these blasts perfectly, closing the distance between the two at an alarming rate. Shinji found himself on edge, ready to move in between them if necessary before Misato gave her orders.
"Shinji-kun, engage! Do not let that thing near the positron rifle. Ayanami-san, concentrate fire on the big one, don't let it finish off Units 02 and 03!"
"Ryokai!" They responded immediately, and set to work.
The albino realigned the targeting pip on her hud, fixing it on the partially regenerated but still lumbering Divine. She ignored the swiftly incoming smaller Seraph, as she'd been ordered to, and obeyed without question. Although, another thought gave her surprising comfort.
Ikari-kun is with me. He will protect me...
Her assertion was proven correct, as the Seraph had to roll out of Unit 01's charge, darting backwards to avoid a mighty punch. Whilst her brother kept it occupied, Rei closed her finger around her control stick's trigger, and fired upon the other Seraph, whom had been lumbering towards the helpless Unit 02. Once again, it sensed the danger, and used its own A-T field to blast itself away from where the positron beam would strike, just a few dozen metres from where Asuka was slowly regaining control of her Eva and herself.
I swear, if you've even scratched the paint...
With great effort she hauled herself up, her head still feeling quite dizzy from the whole "being stabbed with lightening and hit with a really large hammer" thing. Both of her prog knives had been scattered across the battlefield, far out of reach at this moment, making her options in continuing the engagement limited. But the redhead had never, nor would she ever be, someone who just "gave up."
Asuka flexed her great black hands, curling them into fists which could pound through ten metre thick sheets of titanium with ease. She was within a hundred and sixty metre tall killing machine, one that put fear into the hearts of the gods, and she would not be denied her deserved triumph. However, her ascent was incredibly slow, stars still being present in her eyes as a result of taking a blow to the chin that would have shattered mountains. All whilst being utterly unaware the only reason she was still alive, was because of Rei keeping Israfel from finishing her off.
Meanwhile, its smaller sibling felt his blood boil in anger upon seeing the purple and white monster.
This was it, what slew Sachiel, Shamshel and Ramiel. Now, their souls would have vengeance. As would Gaghiel when the two could get round to the black and blue ones.
By the gods, no other shall die by your hand purple devil!
Isrefael charged his opponent, his smaller and lighter form making him much faster than Unit 01, which was quite a new experience for Shinji. Having a foe who lacked his strength but utterly surpassed his speed was bizarre, the fact that it basically forced him to be more stationary being somewhat welcome. It meant he only had to focus on one thing.
He blocked the Seraph's strike with his A-T field, angling it in such a manner the spear slid off, with its wielder having to dart backwards from an incoming punch, using its own field to block the strike and push itself back. It paced around him for a few moments, like a predatory animal, a master in the art of death, looking for any weakness.
It suddenly lunged forward, attempting to stab into Shinji's leg, only for the much larger Eva to leap forward and slam into it with its own body weight. Knocking the foe clean off its feet, the boy tried to stab down with his newly unsheathed prog knife, before screaming in pain as the spear went into his side.
A typhoon of energy threw him off, with the Seraph trying to get to its feet.
I can't give it an inch!
In a few moments, something akin to a plan formed in Shinji's mind. His enemy had positioned itself in such a way, that its back faced the sea where Unit 02 and 03 resided, and the unfortunate larger Seraph being bombarded by positron fire.
Gah...will you just...piss off!?
If I can just get it down there...I can keep them away from Rei and help evacuate the other two...holy shit, that isn't a bad plan...
Putting it into action, he thundered forward, despite the pain of his internal organs sizzling. He caught the Seraph as it was still trying to regain its balance, causing them both to tumble over each other down the hill, permanently deforming and defacing the picturesque Japanese country side.
"Misato-san, I'm going to try and get them out! Ayanami-chan, cover me!" He barked into his vid link as they reached the bottom of the hill, and their rolling stopped.
"Alright, Shinji-kun, good luck! Ayanami-san, keep up the pressure, like he said." Misato accepted her charge's plan.
"Ryokai, Lieutenant Colonel." Rei acknowledged.
With Isrefael dazed for a few critical minutes, Shinji urged himself over to Unit 02's side, getting down on knee as he tried to take one of its black arms over its shoulder.
"Soryu-san, are you alright?" He said, concerned. All he gained for his trouble was the black Eva shaking him off as its Pilot growled.
"I don't need your help, Third." She snarled, her dizziness finally fading away.
"Oh, because you've been doing so brilliantly without it! We've been ordered to retreat, and that's what we're going to do!" He snapped back, his patience with these gaijn being worn away more and more as time went past.
"Then retreat you coward. I will not be defeated...not by anything-" Asuka kept trying to brush him off.
At that moment, Shinji lost his temper. Firmly grasping the shoulders of Unit 02, he forced it to look at his own searing gaze.
"If you stay here, you die..." He then glanced at the still knocked out Unit 03, before looking back at her.
"Both of you."
The two held eye contact for a few moments, until Unit 02's four eyes, and those of its Pilot, lowered in something akin to defeat.
"Damn it." Its pilot hissed.
Never being one for enjoying victory, Shinji accepted this and hauled Asuka off the ground, taking a quick glance at the smaller Seraph, still weakly trying to rise to its feet, only to keep falling back down.
"Lieutenant Colonel, I'm almost out of ammunition for the rifle. I have three shots left." Rei relayed.
"Damn it...hoped it would last a bit longer...take out the smaller one."
"Ryokai."
The albino began the painstakingly slow readjustment of the heavy rifle, her hud lining up an ideal trajectory on Isrefael. It had been almost beyond belief how flexible and fast the larger Seraph could be, quite artfully throwing itself out of her fire's way at just the right time. It would take a minute to readjust, but clearly the smaller Seraph wouldn't be getting up anytime soon.
Meanwhile, Shinji and Asuka stood before Israfel, finally free from bombardment, who looked upon them with no small amount of frustration in his black eyes.
Oh, have you decided to fight me with some degree of honour now!?
The ground shook as he charged, the desire to splatter their brains across the countryside being too much to resist for the large Divine.
"I'll take this one, you get Meadow-san!" Shinji barked at his German colleague, before countering the Seraph's charge, sliding under the strike of its hammer as their fields flared upon making contact with one another.
Asuka, fought against her lust for combat, darting around the vicious melee and making straight for her incapacitated colleague, whose vid link showed him still sleeping like a baby.
"Sam, wake up!" She snapped, shaking the blue Evangelion for added effect. Gaining absolutely nothing in response.
"Ugh, that was just a tap!" She rolled her eyes in annoyance, throwing the a hundred and sixty metre long monster over her back. The weight was one of the heaviest she'd ever lifted, but it was not nearly enough to bend her. She couldn't move as fast, but still due to its sheer size the Eva moved faster than any other living creature. Well, save for the Seraphim...
Whenever the hammer hit the ground, massive craters were forged as the earth itself shook from the blow. Shinji knew he'd be pulverised if he stayed still for too long, however his goal was not to kill this thing, but delay it. To buy precious time for the other two to get clear.
All he could really do was dodge, there was no chance of blocking the enemy's strike, and there was little chance that it would even let him get close enough to jab it with his tiny prog knife. Meanwhile, Israfel was continuously rumbling to himself.
Just attack me, or stay still...gah, where is Isrefael when you need him!?
Roughly a league ahead of you on that beach if you wish to know. He's somewhat dazed...
Haniel answered, his own conversation with the weaker Divine Heir not being very enlightening.
What? After a little fall like that? Honestly we wrestled each other in our youth far more roughly.
He caught a glimpse of his brother quietly lying by the sea, as he fought off his chronic dizziness.
As helpless as he was in the womb...my poor brother...oh gods. The realisation suddenly struck Israfel harder than what he imagined would be a fist in the face from father.
The enemy had stopped shooting with their powerful weapon for a while now, meaning two things. That they had run out of ammunition...or had changed target.
The Divine Heir charged, Shinji swerving around him with an ease brought only from experience. What he didn't expect was for his foe to continue barrelling past him towards its smaller counterpart, snatching up the nigh helpless creature and throwing them both out of the Positron rifle's final blast. The area where they'd been, was now nought but a charred and blackened ruin. At great personal risk to itself, the larger Seraph had saved its comrade, and was now tenderly cradling it, as if trying to wake it up.
The boy did not dwell on this however. As a soldier, you had to attend to such things before or after battle, and never during it. Hence why, the moment he had an opening to withdraw, Shinji took it without question.
"Everyone get to the lifts, they're distracted!" He roared over the comms, with Misato commanding that said lifts be prepared for their arrival.
Asuka and Samuel had just reached the crest of the hill, right where Rei was as she gently retrieved the positron rifle. In approximately ten seconds, Shinji had crossed the ground between him and his squad mates, not daring to look back as he knew in his heart the Seraphim were now in pursuit.
In that respect he was correct.
They were not sprinting, just murderously pacing towards their enemy, clearly enjoying the fear they put into their enemy's hearts. But even then, it was far too late for the Twin Heirs to catch their prey. And they knew it.
"We're clear!" Shinji barked. The four Evas, one being held over another's shoulder, engaged in something akin to a sprinting match, having now crested the hill, as the armoured forces of the JSA rumbled past them and assumed position on the ridge, five Susanoos hovering above them. With an almighty roar, they let loose their war song upon the enemy who threatened their homeland, with just as much success as they did before. But this was only to buy time for something else...
The two Seraphim watched their prey scramble away from them in a mad dash to safety, as the much weaker forces of the Vooren engaged with reckless courage. This was a victory, a first step towards the reclamation of Ejrod, the restoration of their people's honour, and the avenging of their siblings. Even as three N2 mines hurtled towards them, Israfel and Isrefael were not troubled. For they had achieved nothing less than the utter humiliation of the enemy. Now...soon...they had to see to their ruin.
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7:45pm, NERV Central, briefing room
Upon the digital board, the slide show continued to play, images of the two freshly arrived Evas having what could be described as "the snot kicked out of them."
The four Pilots had taken a position in front of the board, Samuel and Rei having assumed a military stance, legs snapped together, backs straight, arms held behind their backs. Asuka sat on a foldable chair, looking both thoughtful and irritated, whilst Shinji leaned against the wall, his expression disapproving, his arms folded.
He didn't feel "better" than them, nor was he regretful that they were still alive. But frustration had almost completely overtaken his heart.
They'd outnumbered the enemy two to one, and these baka had utterly lost. They would have died, without question, where he and Rei not present. In some ways it was as Samuel said, he was militia. Called up at a moment's notice to be used as cannon fodder until the regulars arrived. But, unlike these well trained, well equipped colleagues of theirs, Shinji and Rei had one very crucial thing which the Imperial and the German didn't. Something which, in a way, made them totally outrank the "rookies."
Experience.
"So..." Vice Commander Fuyutsuki began with a sigh. Around him stood the other superior officers of NERV, or "Section 1's." The other three Sub Commanders stood around him, gathered together in this small place for a very important session. In the corner of course, was UNIS agent Ryoji Kaji, who looked faintly bemused by the whole situation. He was there to carry out his official purpose of reporting back to the United Nations on NERV's doings.
"Despite seeing what occurred from the command bridge, I would very much like to hear your perspective on the battle." The old man said thoughtfully, and understandingly. For whilst this was a gargantuan issue, let it never be said that he was unfair. Hence why most of NERV's staff far preferred him over Gendo.
The four children were quiet for a while, until Rei spoke up in her usual calm and controlled demeanor.
"We engaged the enemy in a two line formation. As Pilots Soryu and Meadow were considered superior for straight up combat, they were placed ahead of myself and Ikari-kun. The enemy proceeded to...divide-" She took a quick look at the image which displayed the Seraph splitting into two separate entities, as if she were still struggling to believe it.
"-and overpowered both Units 02 and 03. Therefore myself and Ikari-kun were ordered to support and cover a retreat. As we are all standing here without grievous injury, I think the operation was a resounding success, although...it may have been an easier task if my colleagues had obeyed orders-"
From his corner of the room, Shinji could sense Asuka's rage boil over as she abruptly stood up and pointed a finger at the albino.
"Shut up, dummkopf, I could have taken them, I didn't need your help-"
"Considering you were seconds away from death, Soryu-san, I highly doubt it. Continue, Ayanami-san." Kozo silenced her with the raising of his hand, allowing Rei to proceed whilst Samuel glared at her with his cold blue eyes.
"Today the enemy operated as a unit, and we did not. I believe that is the primary cause of our defeat." The blue haired girl bowed her head slightly.
"Do you concur with your colleague's assessment, Ikari-san?" The old man turned his gaze upon Shinji, who responded immediately.
"I do, Vice Commander." He confirmed.
Despite his words, the ire of the two foreigners was still fixed upon the clone, with Samuel's fists trembling slightly, muttering "barbarian" under his breath, and Asuka fixing her with a glare.
"Oh it'll be a cold day in hell before I let a doll lecture me!" She snarled.
Shinji's previously distant gaze snapped up, sheer, bottomless fury in his heart.
"What did you just call her!?" He roared.
"Enough!" Kozo's voice took on a surprising sternness, causing total silence to descend upon the room.
"Now that I have your attention, know this. The JSA's N2 strike has badly damaged the enemy, but make no mistake they will recover. They will be knocking on our door in about a week's time, I hope by then you might actually start treating this situation as adults, not children stroking their egos." Harshness filtered into that old voice.
"You dare speak to a member of the Imperial nobility in such a manner?" The blonde boy's eyebrows narrowed, as he did not take too kindly to being called a "child." Not when he'd worked so hard, for so very long, to shake off that title. Especially after being brushed aside and having to be carried off the field by someone that was once regarded as a possible enemy of the Empire.
Kozo blinked, disapprovingly.
"Meadow-san, in the words of your father, whom I have only just spoken to, you are a soldier, act like one."
Any response Samuel had died in his throat at those words, utter shame and guilt overcoming all of his other senses. He quietened his tongue, and bowed his head in submission.
The old man massaged his eyebrows for a few moments before finishing the sorry display.
"You have approximately seven days to get whatever issues you have with one another straightened out. Neither myself, nor the Commander, will tolerate any more of this petulance. Mankind's survival is at stake...your quests for glory come a long way behind that. Do I make myself clear?"
There was a chorus of "Hai" from Shinji, Asuka, and Rei, with of course Samuel giving a curt "Yes, sir."
Accepting what he could get, Kozo nodded.
"Dismissed."
The four children filed out of the room, leaving only the NERV Command staff and the UNIS Agent.
"Any suggestions?" His old gravelly voice inquired.
Misato immediately responded with drill like precision. It had come to her charge's surprise to learn she was actually a Sub Commander, specifically that of Section 3, of armed security.
"Vice Commander, I would recommend extensive team building exercises. They need to work as a unit if we're going to get through this." She put bluntly.
"Seconded. I saw a few too many squads get wiped out by the Chinese because of things like that." Shiro added.
Kozo looked back and forth between the two seasoned soldiers, accepting their advice.
I suppose we have no other choice...team building...SEELE will not take this lightly. I need to get Ikari back here to smooth things over with them.
It was irritating how often the Supreme Commander had to disappear, but it was necessary. On this particular day, he'd been in talks with Kotai Industries, attempting to acquire some resources from them. The old man did find himself a little bothered by the situation. Granted, they couldn't lose, the scrolls had stated as much. But he really did wish these children wouldn't make things any more difficult than they had to, and possibly prove a prophecy as old as the sands wrong through their immaturity.
Although considering their histories...that sort of behaviour is hardly surprising. He grimly reminded himself. But then, the Vice Commander cheered himself up, reckoning he had an idea which would most certainly help the "team building" in the short term...as for long term, well...the furthest NERV thought ahead was December 31st 2017, so it wasn't overly relevant. Besides, as according to the scenario, fixing some personal problems for now but cause the development of later ones could be useful...
"Very well then, Katsuragi-san, I leave our newcomers in your hands..." He couldn't help but grin slightly as his mind went over all the necessary paper work and hologram conversations that needed doing for what was about to be done.
Misato looked confused for a moment, then her brown eyes widened. Ritsuko let out a loud "Hah!" whilst a few others sniggered.
"Vice Commander...you can't be serious...in my house?"
--------------------------------
The two gaijn chattered at the same volume they'd had upon coming in to the cages over an hour ago. But now, instead of jovial bragging, there was only grumblings of frustration and anger. All of which clawed down Shinji's spine, his own anger slowly building up to a boiling point. Rei easily recognized this, as she'd never seen the child of her progenitor behave in such a way, as if he wanted to strike something, anything.
It...frightened her.
However, Shinji was among those who could somewhat read her body language, and he felt some pangs of guilt at, what was to him, her clear discomfort.
"I'm alright, Ayanami-chan." He offered quietly.
"Have Pilots Meadow and Soryu made you angry?" She asked, something akin to timidness in her voice.
"We'll talk about it later."
Behind them, Asuka continued to fume whilst her friend did something similar, except he reflected a little more on his actions. Both her fists were balled as the Vice Commander's words cut through her mind like a knife through butter.
I'm not a child! I'm an elite, the best of the best! I had everything under control, I didn't need any help, I don't need anyone's help!
"I don't understand, I am an Eva Pilot elite. How the hell did I lose to a cheap trick like that?" She growled before glaring at Samuel.
"How the hell did we lose? Gott Verdammut, Sam, we always come out on top in combat sims, we have the highest synch ratios, so how did those stupid, brainless, hulking animals-"
The Imperial was not quite in the mood to respond, although he did agree with her to some extent.
I've been taught to serve for as long as I can remember. I studied at bloody Sandhurst, under some of the finest military minds in the Empire, and I still got crushed more easily than we did the French! Damn it...that shouldn't have happened...what a failure I am...
Before they knew it, Shinji had swung round to face them, directly barring their way, his patience finally worn out with the both of them. His own feelings towards himself evaporated for these few moments, their behaviour was endangering thousands of lives and it needed to be nipped in the bud right here and now.
"First thing, if you actually think Seraphim aren't anything more than dumb animals, then you're fools. They are smart, they are cunning, and they will do anything to kill you." His eyebrows narrowed, utter dissatisfaction in them.
"Don't tell me how to Pilot my Eva, Third. I've been doing it since you were still in your ficking diapers-" Asuka was in the process of snarling, before the older and more experienced boy cut her off, his tone slightly louder than hers.
"You're good, Soryu-san, I'll give you that. But you aren't a soldier, not by a long shot. From now, you listen to what others say. You obey orders, your shallow pride be damned. Maybe then, you might actually have a chance of living through this." Where he not so irritated and infuriated, Shinji may have noticed how the redhead's expression had frozen, as if unaware of what to say or do in the face of his scolding.
As if she were a rabbit in the headlights.
"From now on, I expect better from both of you." He gave a quick glare at the taller Imperial. "If you're elite, then you should be capable of actually engaging the enemy without me and Ayanami-chan having to haul you out of the fire. This isn't a damned game or simulation...this is war. You lose, you die, it's that simple. I hope you might understand that someday." Finished with his dressing down, he walked away, both of his hands balled into fists.
The Imperial and the German watched him storm off, with Rei swiftly following her progenitor's child. Samuel felt the more experienced yet younger boy's words further etch themselves into his head, provoking a sense of frustration and...inadequacy.
To be lectured by a Barbarian...but he's right. I have failed the Empire today. I must not do so again...for the sake of the homeland.
Asuka meanwhile had overcome her shock, and turned it into a feeling all too familiar to her.
Anger.
"Just who the holle put you in charge dummkopf!?" She screamed after his disappearing back, gaining nothing in response. She and her colleague stood in the corridor, alone and ignored, as if they were petulant children.
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while the behavior and thoughts of samuel and asuka seem well done and typical-and i still curious as to what direction samuel will develop at later part of it.
I find Shinji somewhat out of character here... He himself didn't have military training beforehand, and i don't recall mention of any training in NERV side from the simulations-as such the military tone of his post action report, his outburst about how the angels are cunning and will kill them, how asuka is playing soldier, etc-seem not fitting. am i missing something? because i can't help but feel its someone else talking, not Shinji.
I find Shinji somewhat out of character here... He himself didn't have military training beforehand, and i don't recall mention of any training in NERV side from the simulations-as such the military tone of his post action report, his outburst about how the angels are cunning and will kill them, how asuka is playing soldier, etc-seem not fitting. am i missing something? because i can't help but feel its someone else talking, not Shinji.
- Location
- CA
I don't think you need to have military training to realize what Shinji did, share it in an angry outburst and want to slap these two arrogant pilots upside the head. For instance, he learned with his very first angel that they're a lot more than dumb beasts since it treated their fight like a duel. That said, Shinji does seem a little off. Of course, he's always been more aggressive and courageous/sensible about the realities of him having to pilot in this fic than in canon. But, now I think he's also showing leadership, which is new. It's interesting character development, but Shinji is starting to seem less like, well, Shinji. I guess what I'm trying to say is I hope he's still a high-functioning, mentally disturbed teenager underneath everything else, and not going to become a bit of a "mary sue."
I did like the contrast in strategies and depth of teamwork employed by the twins. Your fights really are capturing and displaying the personality of the fighters, which can be difficult, but payoff really well. I especially liked that they're still using the Positron rifle. I disliked how guns seemed completely nerfed after Ramiel in the original series.
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Lord Sovereign
The Emperor of shitty fanfic
- Location
- England
...oh sweet Jesus no. Don't worry, I'm most certainly not going for that, I'd much rather leap to my doom over a cliffside.
I have every intention of him remaining something of a wimp (especially in social interaction), still making a whole load of slip ups along the way, except he takes the whole "protecting the world from eldritch demi-gods" thing a lot more seriously than his canon counterpart.
But do bear in mind by this point, Shinji is a combat veteran. He understands his enemy a good deal more than either Samuel and Asuka, he knows the seriousness of the situation, and these pups mewling about "simulations and synch ratios" is going to get on his nerves.
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UberNimrod
I scared Setsuna with my bad decisions.
- Location
- Between Hither and Yon.
What makes this especially comical is this: Has anyone explained to them that high synch ratios means higher ability to feel what the Evas feel? That part of the fight looked right to me, especially with both Asuka and Samuel being knocked silly BECAUSE of those high synch ratios.
Remember that Shinji was relieved that the REAL fighting people were arriving. Which meant less burden on him. Seeing Asuka and Samuel acting like idiot glory-hounds on the battlefield puts him in danger as well, as he really didn't want to fight in the first place.
I seem to remember that someone said that this probably will not happen. Is that still true?
Remember that Shinji was relieved that the REAL fighting people were arriving. Which meant less burden on him. Seeing Asuka and Samuel acting like idiot glory-hounds on the battlefield puts him in danger as well, as he really didn't want to fight in the first place.
I seem to remember that someone said that this probably will not happen. Is that still true?
Lord Sovereign
The Emperor of shitty fanfic
- Location
- England
I don't recall who said that, but in answer to it "wait and see..."
- Location
- Can't read map
Samuel and Asuka are overdosed on Ego? Their bodies are leaking, couldn't contain it all... and Shinji caught some, making him act odd and lash out on those two?
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With their control methods 10-40% percent of sync ratio should be good enough? Enough to feel damage on unit, it's position of limbs and on ground, but not enough to be incapacitated if EVA's leg or eye is disintegrated in very painful manner?
70-100% seems more of handicap, then help to control EVA better.
... and for their years of training, even if angels were dumb animal, they would probably loose gain...
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In front of Misato are Samuel and Asuka in wheel chairs, broken bones. They are looking like mummies from amount of bandages, as well as missing half their hair... that wasn't lost to burns, but by being ripped away by... "someone".
"So... angel was breathing it's last breath and Samuel went to cut off it's head to finish it... when Asuka suddenly jumped with her spear to kill angel. By actual accident she critically damaged Samuel's unit and missed angel, as she wasn't waiting for Samuel to get out of way. After that Samuel has in his last moments shot Asuka's unit into face, blowing of it's head... You two then exited own EVAs and started fighting... While you were distracted, angels has sneaked away. We have no idea where is it, but it's definitely got enough time to regenerate all damage it took...
Tell me... what were you doing all those year?! What idiot made your training programs to make you such stupid glory hounds who ignore orders?! EVAs were more damaged by each other, almost no damage came from angel!"
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Yeah... bragging on high sinc rating seem silly to me. Pilots use screens and joystick to manipulate EVAs, not brain-machine interface to use EVA's legs and eyes like their own?
With their control methods 10-40% percent of sync ratio should be good enough? Enough to feel damage on unit, it's position of limbs and on ground, but not enough to be incapacitated if EVA's leg or eye is disintegrated in very painful manner?
70-100% seems more of handicap, then help to control EVA better.
... and for their years of training, even if angels were dumb animal, they would probably loose gain...
---------------------------------------
In front of Misato are Samuel and Asuka in wheel chairs, broken bones. They are looking like mummies from amount of bandages, as well as missing half their hair... that wasn't lost to burns, but by being ripped away by... "someone".
"So... angel was breathing it's last breath and Samuel went to cut off it's head to finish it... when Asuka suddenly jumped with her spear to kill angel. By actual accident she critically damaged Samuel's unit and missed angel, as she wasn't waiting for Samuel to get out of way. After that Samuel has in his last moments shot Asuka's unit into face, blowing of it's head... You two then exited own EVAs and started fighting... While you were distracted, angels has sneaked away. We have no idea where is it, but it's definitely got enough time to regenerate all damage it took...
Tell me... what were you doing all those year?! What idiot made your training programs to make you such stupid glory hounds who ignore orders?! EVAs were more damaged by each other, almost no damage came from angel!"
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Lord Sovereign
The Emperor of shitty fanfic
- Location
- England
Hmmm...only five likes...
Was the chapter not to everyone's satisfaction? If there is a problem, do let me know. I rather like a bit of criticism.
Was the chapter not to everyone's satisfaction? If there is a problem, do let me know. I rather like a bit of criticism.
- Location
- Huezil
Something is off, i can't point it yet, but when i can, i sure will.
One question, you had a writer block them pushed this chapter out? Because pushing a chapter causes a drop on quality.
Lord Sovereign
The Emperor of shitty fanfic
- Location
- England
Not at all. I found that the words quite positively flowed for me, and I spent a good deal of time proofreading the damn thing.
- Location
- Huezil
The first one we have a proactive shinji, what is something that feels a lot out of character, if he coerced into talking would be one thing, but he simply begins to talk, that's not the Shinji we know, and he only begins having confidence after Israfel, so this seems a little contrived.
This one is Shinji we know, he's passive-agressive, but if he's pushed enough he goes into attack.
So yeah, watch episode eleven, and you will see that only after defeating Israfel is that Shinji turns confident, before that he was simply lucky...
Lord Sovereign
The Emperor of shitty fanfic
- Location
- England
It's not confidence. His superior officer has asked a question, and he's answering it to the best of his ability. And let's face it, he alongside Rei is probably one of the best people to explain just what the hell happened from an "on the ground" perspective.
- Location
- Huezil
But when confronted he becomes scared, he has fear of being confronted, and a superior officer asking him is a confrontation, as besides he fears displeasing people, so even if he is answering a direct question, he would try to make things sound less confrontational, because of fear of hurting asuka.
Lord Sovereign
The Emperor of shitty fanfic
- Location
- England
Considering our boi takes his job a good deal more seriously than he did in the original, he is semi-mad over the whole situation, what with the operation being nearly blown by the glory hunting ways of our western friends. But even then, there is no direct assault on any of their characters. All he says on the matter is that "they were overpowered," which is an honest, objective, and correct assessment of the situation. Nothing negative about their competence or anything.
- Location
- Huezil
Whon can i explain, if it was rei saying it, i would be totally fine, but it's not... try writing it in rei voice and read again...
Lord Sovereign
The Emperor of shitty fanfic
- Location
- England
Looking back on it, I find you are correct. Hence why I've just redone that scene, thank you for the advice.
- Location
- Huezil
Now it's perfect!