The mood in the kommand zenta was ded good. He and his biggest boyz were still roarin' "ERE WE GO" at full blast, bashin' their choppas or shootas into the ground all rhythmic-like. Killkrusha stood above 'em on the kommand podium, roarin' the loudest, spit flyin', and smashin' his big choppa into the ground the hardest, just like he should as the Boss of Waaagh Killkrusha. His mouth twisted into a big grin as he watched the boyz get all riled up, their blood boilin' and the Waaagh energy risin' in anticipation of a propa scrap. After they had krumped the tasty bugs and the big space bugs to the last bug, stuff had gotten real boring and his boyz had started fightin' among themselves, which he couldn't have for a propa Waaagh. He had to krump the meks and their grots to motivate 'em to find a way to bring 'em to their next fight. But Gork and Mork had been on his side, givin' him his flyin' Killkrushkroosa.
Feelin' his belly grumblin', he turned towards his second-in-kommand: Notbigboss, the largest of his Warbosses, but still much smaller than him, o' course. He'd called him Notbigboss after krumpin' him the first time they met, since he'd dared to declare himself the Boss of the form' Waaagh. Since Killkrusha was the biggest boss, Bigboss was now Notbigboss, leavin' the title of biggest boss to Killkrusha. Killkrusha had killkrushed one of his arms in their first fight, and the painboyz had given him a shiny new metal arm with a big claw and an integrated shoota.
"You roar," he growled at Notbigboss, scratchin' his behind as the Warboss stumbled forward to bellow and roar even louder. "Me is hungry."
Killkrusha walked off stage, his beady eyes blinkin' in the dim light, lookin' for a squig or maybe even a grot to snack on among his mega-armored boyz still shoutin', singin', and stompin'. His favorite Killakan followed him. He was the reason Killkrusha didn't trust their meks with all their fancy gubbins—they'd put his favorite grot in a Killakan. He didn't need no armor to make himself bigger or shootas to make himself louder. He was already the biggest and loudest there was. The Mek responsible had been killkrushed, o' course. And Picturegrot had been renamed to Picturekan, with the picture box and the voice box now strapped to the front of the little Killakan.
Killkrusha was a sneaky one, not necessarily in the sneaky sense, but in knowin' how to gather boyz around him. Meks might think their gargantz or megafortressez were their strongest, most WAAAGH invention, but Killkrusha knew it was the picture and voice box. It had served him well on the scrap world, where he'd used it to record krump challenges for rival bosses, either killkrushing them or turnin' them into his bosses. Picturegrot had used the picture and voice box to show his krumps via mega antenna gubbins to all the orks around, convincin' 'em that he was the biggest and strongest.
"Boss! Boss!" A familiar voice hollered from behind. Killkrusha spun 'round to see his smartest Mek, BigMek, clankin' over in his megarmor. BigMek wasn't the biggest mek outside his fancy suit, but meks had their own way of figurin' out who was biggest and smartest. Killkrusha let 'em be, long as they knew he was the biggest and strongest of all Orks in the Waaagh. Killkrusha's brows furrowed, nostrils flared, and his hand tightened on his favorite choppa. He was huntin' for a snack, and BigMek interruptin' him made him proper angry. He thought about munchin' one of the grots hangin' off BigMek's back, carryin' bags of wrenches and toolz.
"Wot is it, BigMek?" Killkrusha roared.
"I'z gettin' a transmission from a humie world," BigMek swallowed hard, knowin' the Waaaghboss was in a foul mood. "It's a krump challenge, addressed to you."
Killkrusha blinked, the gears in his head grindin'. He stroked his chin with his free hand, then burst out laughin'.
"Everywun, shut yer gobs! I got an announcement!" he roared. The singin' stopped abruptly, and the slow ones who didn't shut up quick got krumped into silence by their mates. He rushed back on stage, Picturekan and BigMek trundlin' after him. Back on the command stage, he grabbed his choppa with both hands, flexin' his impressive muscles before bellowin', "Boyz! Looks like some humie on a humie world thinks they're tough enough to challenge Killkrusha."
Laughter boomed from the crowd of orks, Killkrusha grinnin' wide. "They sent a krump challenge trans-transmischiii—ah, who cares! They sent a krump challenge! BigMek, put it up on da big picture skreen!"
BigMek was already on it, the big picture screen flickering to life, showing a bunch of smaller screens comin' together. Killkrusha blinked as the sudden burst of light hit the kommand zenta, remindin' him he was proper hungry. Then, just as quick, the lights went out again. He was ready to krump BigMek for messin' up, leavin' Killkrusha standin' there like a git, when the sound boxes crackled to life. Waaagh drums and 'eavy metal blasted out, buildin' up a rhythm that had all the boyz' attention, completely transfixed. Killkrusha grinned, bobbin' his head to the epic tunes, as they hit an explosive finale and the screens lit up once more.
"A VETERAN OF THE INFINITE WAR," a deep voice boomed in the humie tongue. The big picture screen now glowed blue,a lucky color, showin'...one, two, three, four, five, uh, what came after five? Six! A symbol made of six squares with a bit of cloth flappin' behind it. Killkrusha grunted, intrigued. An Infinite Waaagh, eh? Maybe this challenger was worth a squig's bite. The music shifted to a constant, thundering beat of drums.
"SHIELD OF THE COALITION," the voice continued, Killkrusha grunting in response.
"AND THE TALLEST HUMAN IN THE SECTOR!"
"Wot?" Killkrusha bellowed, excitement sparklin' in his eyes. Maybe Gork and Mork were blessin' him again. Defeatin' the tallest humie around would make his boyz respect him even more. "Is dat true?"
"HER NAME..." The voice paused dramatically, Killkrusha glancin' around at his boyz, all hooked on the music and the big screen. This couldn't stand, he was the sneakiest, knowin' how to grab his boyz' attention. "LIEUTENANT GENERAL REBECCA SHEPARD."
The six-square symbol and the flutterin' cloth gave way to a picture of a single humie in fancy blue armor, with loads of humies in blocky black megarmor behind her, and even bigger humie walkers with tons of dakka behind that. Killkrusha squinted, tryin' to figure out her height. He nodded, satisfied, when he saw the megaarmored humies behind her, she was likely even taller than them. Maybe she was the tallest humie in the sector after all.
"I am Lieutenant General Shepard," her face suddenly filled the big picture screen, twisted in anger, pointing at him. "You want a fight, you green git? Well, if you and yer boyz reckon you're up for it, come and have a go!"
A picture of the humie world popped up on the screen, a red dot blinkin' on one of their landmasses.
The screen cut back to her, showin' her gnashin' her teeth. "But don't you get it twisted, no matter how much dakka you think you've got, I've got more!"
The image zoomed out, the Lieutenant General and her megaarmored humies shrinkin' away. Killkrusha gasped, his small brain whirrin' as he saw behind her an endless sea of humie tanks, walkas, and way in the back, even mega-fortresses.
"I can make as much dakka as I want," her voice boomed, and the screen cut to a massive factory. A blue light beam flickered on, and another big humie tank appeared outta nowhere. The tank rumbled off, and the light beam flickered again. Killkrusha's brain worked hard to figure it out, but BigMek clunked over, whisperin' in his ear, "Boss, unlimited scrap."
"UNLIMITED SCRAP!?" Killkrusha roared, finally gettin' the gist, his mouth twistin' into a massive grin. But then she kept goin'.
"Oh, and by the way, green's a rubbish color. Blue is way better. If you dare to prove otherwise, come and beat me, ya coward."
The ork crowd behind him roared in anger, booing loudly. Everyone knew green was the best. She'd just insulted all of Ork-kind, and the mood turned ugly fast.
"That's it! Everyone, shut yer gobs!" Killkrusha bellowed, and the crowd fell silent. "BigMek, get us over to where we can krump the, uh, the Luvta, uh, the Scrap Queen. Take us where we can fight the Scrap Queen. Boyz, do ya agree with her? Is blue better?"
The crowd roared their disagreement, their voices and shootas echoing through the kommand zenta, shootas blasting into the ceiling.
"Exactly!" Killkrusha roared. "Green is the best! The Scrap Queen thinks she's got more dakka than the Waaagh, but we'll krump her dakka, turn it into our own, and that means we'll have unlimited dakka too. And when we do, we'll krump the tallest humie in the sector!"
"You is so smart, Boss," NotBigBoss chimed in from the side. Killkrusha gave him a nod, then turned back to the boyz.
"This is why I'm da boss of the Waaagh! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!"
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!"
