Arc 5 Post 17: Bottled Miracles
Bottled Miracles
24st of Rova 4707 A.R. (Absalom Reckoning)
Though the people of Augustana shun the night and name it perilous, a time for thieves, footpads, and scoundrels to take to the streets while good honest folk retreat behind their doors, with a prayer to Sarenrae to see them safe until dawn.
Yet 'the Fleet never sleeps', a jest upon foreigners who would think the saying refers to the Andoran Navy, a squadron of which is almost always present in the Salt Harbor to deter any thoughts of easy brigandage from pirates or 'pirates' of Chelish extraction, in truth it refers to a domain more concerned with the gaining of wealth than preserving it: spilling out from the Fleet and Market bridges is the domain of the Merchant Council, from your understanding a circle of rich traders who had agreed upon common rules that police its streets. These include banishing dyers and tanners to the outskirts of the city, dealing with rowdiness, drunkenness, and minor destruction of property in-house without the involvement of the magistrates and leveraging the full power of the Council against anyone caught tampering with the weights and measures in the wake of the infamous 'sawdust riots' two decades past, when it had been discovered that the flour sold to many of the city's poorer residents was about half lumbermill leavings.
Under no light but the thin sliver of moon above, you and Cob can wander almost without notice peering up at signs, or in the case of wealthier establishments, windows that allow one to peek at the wears through the wavy glass. But no shop is as brazen in its advertising as the Swing O' Miracles, for in place of a sign carved in wood above the door is a swirling spiral of bright colors like a silent storm of alchemical torches occasionally writing out messages into the air: 'Hottest Anulite Paprika', one proclaims in blazing red; 'Hexbiter Charms form the Savage Northlands' says another, with the message ending by shaping itself into a pair of ivory jaws and snapping shut.
Cob is hooked the moment he lays eyes on the place, and you practically have to run to keep up with him.
Inside the riot of colors is a little more muted by the light of what you would guess are worm-oil lanterns, though they're probably not: dozens of cabinets, tables, and chests lie stacked haphazardly with various kinds of concoctions, decoctions, and what you hope are pieces of colored glass for display perched precariously atop them. You have a brief horrified image of Cob knocking over one of the tables and having to use most of your money to pay off the damages.
"Heloo, Heloo good sirs," a halfling woman, features delicate even for their diminutive kindred, says. "Are you a goblin? It's been so long since one of you came around my shop. I'm Mirindi the Miraculous, and this is the Swig O' Miracles! What can I do you for?"
Akorian Knowledge (Dungeoneering) (DC 15/20): 1d20+5 = 7 (Failure)
Over the course of the next bell you discover that she is not in fact a halfling, but a gnome, kin to the svirfneblin who flit in and out of the tales of the People's tales, though she bares little resemblance to the crafty merchants and cunning warriors who are said to hold secret passages between Nar Voth and the deeper realms.
Though her shop does not, contrary to the name, stock true holy magics, Mirindi does manage to find a batch of 'bone burn' that she learned how to brew in Vigil from grave dirt and the blood of righteous men shortly before having to flee the city, inquisitors of Sarenrae hot on her trail, convinced that she sampled the blood herself.
"Honestly now, a girl can't pay for blood donations and scrape up a bit of topsoil from a grave without some fool with a foot-tall hat thinking you're a vampire."
Additionally you buy some more ordinary acid for getting past locks that prove too troublesome to pick and Cob picks out a pair of dung grenades that cost more than all the rest of it put together, though to be fair you imagine most living foes would have an even harder time defending themselves while emptying out their stomachs than covered in acid.
Gained 5x Alchemical Acid; 5x Bone Burn; 2x Dung Grenade
Lost 275 gp -> Now at 3,301 gp 19 sp 21 cp
Not really expecting much, given the state of the shop, you ask the merchant if she has anything convenient to keep treasures. Her eyes brighten instead as she bustles into the back and, after an only mildly alarming amount of creaking and clanking, she brings out a large leather bag marked with smoldering runes and a few faded splotches of what might have once been blood before an alchemical cleaning. "This might be what you're looking for. Not only can it hold a lot more than it seems, but if you knock someone out for a bit and then wave this over then... thwap, all their stuff's in the bag. Just make sure they're really out and not just faking it or you might end up like the last owner."
It sounds perfect, better than you had hoped, then she names a price. That is most of your gold going into Mirindi's pockets, no hope of a weapon for Gorok as you had hoped... unless. Cob certainly looks interested in so clever of a bag. Part of you wonders if this is your chance to get him to sell that reeking armor.
Looter's Satchel
Description: A large leather bag marked with smoldering runes and a few fades spotches of what might have once been blood before an alchemical cleaning
Ability: The satchel functions as a bag of holding (type I). Additionally, as long as the satchel is not overloaded, the bearer can hold it over an adjacent creature that is dead or unconscious and speak a command word. When the command word is spoken, the satchel removes any magic items from the creature's person (such as magic weapons and armor, potions, scrolls, and wondrous items) and deposits them into the bag. This process takes 1 uninterrupted round. If the bearer moves into a different space while the satchel is gathering items in this way, no items are moved into the satchel and the bearer must start the process over. If the satchel would become overloaded from the creature's magic items, it transports as many magic items as it can, from smallest to largest, until it would become overloaded, at which point it stops gathering items.
CL 9th Weight 15 lbs.; Aura moderate conjuration
Price 3,200 gp
Description: A large leather bag marked with smoldering runes and a few fades spotches of what might have once been blood before an alchemical cleaning
Ability: The satchel functions as a bag of holding (type I). Additionally, as long as the satchel is not overloaded, the bearer can hold it over an adjacent creature that is dead or unconscious and speak a command word. When the command word is spoken, the satchel removes any magic items from the creature's person (such as magic weapons and armor, potions, scrolls, and wondrous items) and deposits them into the bag. This process takes 1 uninterrupted round. If the bearer moves into a different space while the satchel is gathering items in this way, no items are moved into the satchel and the bearer must start the process over. If the satchel would become overloaded from the creature's magic items, it transports as many magic items as it can, from smallest to largest, until it would become overloaded, at which point it stops gathering items.
CL 9th Weight 15 lbs.; Aura moderate conjuration
Price 3,200 gp
Do you buy the satchel?
[] Yes
-[] Use the opportunity to try to pry the Otyugh Hide Armor (Gain 1,283 gp)
-[] Unload some other odds and ends: Write in which (Gain ???)
[] No, this thing is too rich for your blood
OOC: Your rolls were higher than average on finding magic items, but not a crit so you do not get precisely what you wanted. Also, since the vote did say buy whatever Akorian and Cob wanted, the latter got dung bombs, that is just like the pull of gravity, a universal law of nature.
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