Son of Death (30k Mortarion Quest)

[x]Yes
-[x] You have done a wonderful job of freeing humanity form the horrors of the galaxy. But we must continue so all I have to say is kill as many of enemy before you die.
 
[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The more I was told of the Dusk Raiders, the more parallels I heard with those who'd fought beside me. I find this promising. The Emperor made a promise to me, that there were more monsters in the galaxy like those we'd already vanquished, which I would fight. Will you kill them with me?"

Blunt and to the point regarding Mortarion's goals, which at this point are basically just "the Emperor seems somewhat trustworthy, but the most important thing is that there's more Overlords in the stars." I like this.
 
[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The more I was told of the Dusk Raiders, the more parallels I heard with those who'd fought beside me. I find this promising. The Emperor made a promise to me, that there were more monsters in the galaxy like those we'd already vanquished, which I would fight. Will you kill them with me?"
 
[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The more I was told of the Dusk Raiders, the more parallels I heard with those who'd fought beside me. I find this promising. The Emperor made a promise to me, that there were more monsters in the galaxy like those we'd already vanquished, which I would fight. Will you kill them with me?"
 
[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The more I was told of the Dusk Raiders, the more parallels I heard with those who'd fought beside me. I find this promising. The Emperor made a promise to me, that there were more monsters in the galaxy like those we'd already vanquished, which I would fight. Will you kill them with me?"
 
[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The more I was told of the Dusk Raiders, the more parallels I heard with those who'd fought beside me. I find this promising. The Emperor made a promise to me, that there were more monsters in the galaxy like those we'd already vanquished, which I would fight. Will you kill them with me?"
 
Hmm… I like what's winning now, but I noticed that it's 75 words long. Why not make it 77 for good luck?

[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The more I was told of the Dusk Raiders, the more parallels I heard with those who'd fought beside me. I find this promising. The Emperor made a promise to me, that there were more monsters in the galaxy like those we'd already vanquished, which I would fight. Will you kill them with me, my sons?"
 
Hmm… I like what's winning now, but I noticed that it's 75 words long. Why not make it 77 for good luck?
Because 77 is also divisible by 11, the number of Malal, whereas the only factors in 75 are 3 and the square of unaffiliated primes. The number 7 gets adequate representation in the first 3 sentences.
 
[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The more I was told of the Dusk Raiders, the more parallels I heard with those who'd fought beside me. I find this promising. The Emperor made a promise to me, that there were more monsters in the galaxy like those we had already vanquished, which I would fight. Will you kill them with me?"

[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The way we fight is similar too. In this, I have found much promise. The Emperor promised we would kill more. Shall we slay the galaxy's monsters together?"
 
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[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The way we fight is similar, too. In this, I have found much promise. The Emperor promised we would kill more. Shall we slay the galaxy's monsters together?"
 
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Because 77 is also divisible by 11, the number of Malal, whereas the only factors in 75 are 3 and the square of unaffiliated primes. The number 7 gets adequate representation in the first 3 sentences.
Malal isn't canon, so there's not much to be worried about there. If we can get full sevens, I want full sevens!

…we need a numerology infopost, clearly :V
 
[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The more I was told of the Dusk Raiders, the more parallels I heard with those who'd fought beside me. I find this promising. The Emperor made a promise to me, that there were more monsters in the galaxy like those we had already vanquished, which I would fight. Will you kill them with me?"

Mort doesn't strike me as feeling a familial connection yet, even if he might respect (or at least be prepared to respect) them as people.

Edit: Wait hang on.

minor change to get it to 76, precisely.
 
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[X] No
-[X] Elaborate
-[X] Write-In: "You acclaim me, but you do not know me. Primarch is but a title, I would ask you salute me as Mortation, when you know Mortation, and you know the Death Guard of Barbarus, as I will come to know Rikard Zhar, and the Dusk Raiders of Alba."

EDIT: everyone voting for Mortarion to have a reasonably good speech and not simply run away from having to speak publicly to his legion the first time he meets them is a coward and a fool :mad:
 
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[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The more I was told of the Dusk Raiders, the more parallels I heard with those who'd fought beside me. I find this promising. The Emperor made a promise to me, that there were more monsters in the galaxy like those we'd already vanquished, which I would fight. Will you kill them with me, my Legion?"

There, 77 words without strange familiar claims.
 
[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The way we fight is similar, too. In this, I have found much promise. The Emperor promised we would kill more. Shall we slay the galaxy's monsters together?"

There, seven sentences of seven words.
 
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Mortarion already referred to them as his sons in the update, so there's not much reason to worry about being overly familiar by referring to them that way-

Okay never mind, seven sentences of seven is perfect, objections withdrawn.

[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The way we fight is similar too. In this, I have found much promise. The Emperor promised we would kill more. Shall we slay the galaxy's monsters together?"
 
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[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The way we fight is similar, too. In this, I have found much promise. The Emperor promised we would kill more. Shall we kill the galaxy's monsters together?"
 
[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The more I was told of the Dusk Raiders, the more parallels I heard with those who'd fought beside me. I find this promising. The Emperor made a promise to me, that there were more monsters in the galaxy like those we had already vanquished, which I would fight. Will you kill them with me?"
 
[X] Yes.
-[X] "I have been told of your history. That your people overthrew a feared tyrant. The people of Barbarus have as well. The way we fight is similar, too. In this, I have found much promise. The Emperor promised we would kill more. Shall we slay the galaxy's monsters together?"
 
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