Bah, we're doing the humans a public service. This way only the individuals truly dedicated to become trainers will leave the forest with us serving as a stress test/sieve by getting rid of the wannabes.
Sure there will be injuries, depleted bank accounts (so many blown up poke-balls) and various forms of electrical/pikachu-centric traumas and phobias developing (even in the 'survivors'); but that is a sacrifice we are willing to make.
Trickster. ("Mischief Matters Most" - you delight in bedeviling silly Humans who come into your forest and making them miserable.)
Chapter 2: I will battle every day
Humans in the forest aren't anything new. You've grown used to them trampling through your territory, sending out their own Pokemon to do battle with the Forest's inhabitants and throwing their metal Apricorns - Pokeballs, they call them - at those they defeat to suck them up and take them away.
They've been doing it less since you started playing with them, though. Maybe it makes you a meanie, but it's just so much fun to watch them squawk and shout and shake their fists at the trees! And there are so many tricks you can play on them. Shocking the little items they hold is always entertaining, of course, and many of them give off interesting - if foul-smelling - types of smoke when you do. But your speed and diminutive size also make you a skilled thief, and more than one Human has found their things missing when they go to grab them off their belt. And then there are the traps you can set with Caterpie yuck and silk-weaver webs and water. Those are tremendous fun.
Yes, the Humans have become a lot warier about venturing into your Forest over the past year. Even if you can't get every trainer, they know you can get any trainer, and with your speed and your home field advantage there's little they can do to stop you. They've even given you a name. Trickster. You like the way it sounds. You like the way they scream it even more.
Right now, your fourth Winter is on the way out and your fifth Spring is in full bloom. You're celebrating this milestone by loitering around at the edge of the Forest, near the biggest path that trainers use to come in from the city. There's plenty of long grass here that you can hide in, and the silly Humans never seem to think that maybe you find them so often by spying on them as they come in.
This time, though, there's one Human of particular interest you're watching. Because this Human is here for you.
"Rojo, I'm telling you, you can't catch it," one of the other Humans says to him as you munch on a berry and watch from the shelter of a bramble patch. Humans all look sort of samey to you except for their colours - and a lot of them change their pelts from day to day, which is just wildly unhelpful in keeping track of them - but you think the one warning the Rojo Human is the same one who tried sending a Pidgey after you through the trees last week.
It had nearly caught up, too, until you'd detoured past a Beedrill Hive and Shocked one of the sentries from behind. Your pursuer had arrived just as you dropped down to the forest floor, and in the absence of any other obvious culprit, the angry swarm had chased the Pidgey back to its Human and the Human halfway across the Forest.
"It's not a Pikachu, it's a demon," he continues, smacking his hand for emphasis. "And even if you could pin it down, it just fries any Pokeball you throw at it. Give it up, man, you'll only wind up losing money."
It's very tempting to hop up into the tree above you and preen smugly at that comment, but you don't want to give away your spying tactic. Instead, you examine the Rojo Human. He's got black hair with a red streak in it that flops over his eyes, and his pelts make you think of raw meat, all pinks and vivid reds. On his chest in pride of place is attached one of the little decorations Humans like to adorn themselves with, though not one you've seen before; a faceted grey shiny with eight sides that's been polished until it gleams. He must value it a lot.
You instantly resolve to do something horrible to it and then laugh at him.
"Guess again," he sneers to the Pidgey-Human. "I actually planned ahead, unlike you losers. Check it out." He plucks two Pokeballs off his belt and fans them between his fingers. "A Machop and a Geodude. These two took me through Pewter Gym and earned me my Boulder Badge. You idiots have been ignoring basic Type theory, going after it with Bugs and Fliers. Of course a crummy Pidgey's gonna lose to an Electric-type. But Machop isn't weak to lightning, and my Geodude's immune. And what's more..."
He plucks another Pokeball off his belt and holds it up to a chorus of gasps. This one is orange-capped instead of the usual red, with a yellow zigzag like your tail on the top and yellow patches on the sides.
"Is that a Fast Ball?" gasps Pidgey-Human. "Don't those cost five times what a normal one does?"
"Sure do," smirks Rojo. "But they're worth it for the catch rate. I brought two," he taps his belt where another one is clipped, "so that Pikachu hasn't got a chance of dodging. Or frying 'em, when it'll be too busy running from my Geodude and getting hemmed in by Machop. I'm walking out of here today with a brand-new Electric type that'll finally let me beat that bitch Brooke in Cerulean."
"Yeah, after she wiped the floor with you last time," mumbles another Human. This one is... probably an older one? You think? He's taller, at least, and Rojo rounds on him immediately, shoulders hunching with indignation.
"Hey, she's way worse than old lady Misty ever was! You got off easy, facing her! Brooke's merciless! And she doesn't play by the rules! Gym leaders are meant to hold back and give you a fair chance, not put you up against their best!"
"Maybe she did hold back and you just suck," someone else comments, and the huddle dissolves into bickering and arguments. You retreat back into the thick of the brambles and pluck another berry, eating it thoughtfully while you consider.
A 'Machop' and a 'Geodude', huh. And the latter is immune to lightning? Well that just sounds completely unfair, not to mention highly implausible. Nothing is immune to lightning if you use enough of it; Grandpa has firmly emphasised that point to you more than once on his occasional visits. Still, you'll believe for the moment that it might be immune to the amount of lightning you can produce. Maybe. Or... well, the amount of lightning you can, like, be bothered to produce. Yeah, that sounds much more likely. You could Shock it unconscious if you wanted, that's obvious, but you pride yourself on being clever so you won't waste the energy.
Those 'Fast Balls', too. If they're what they sound like, they might be a problem. Of course, Rojo has already made his first mistake, which is letting you know he has them. He might have got you with one by pure luck if you're been caught by surprise, but now that you're on guard for them he doesn't have a chance.
Soon enough, Rojo heads into the Forest. You follow, a ghost among the trees, staying at a safe distance and keeping low. The Humans know about how swift and sure-footed you are in the trees, how you can dart along branches and jump between trunks in almost-flight. You encourage them knowing. It means they always expect you to be up there, attacking them from on high, gloating at them from out of their reach, raining down mischief and mockery from your woody throne.
When you spy on them, though, you do it from the ground. Because as long as they're looking up, they don't look down.
Rojo is no exception. He's obviously done his research; he walks along your known haunts, he shouts your name, he throws a few Pokeballs - normal ones - at a Hoothoot here, a Bellsprout there. You're almost tempted not to show yourself at all. Let him wear himself out traipsing around the Forest all day and come back looking the fool.
But that would make it look like Humans can get away with challenging you without reprisal. And that message, you will not endorse. You promised the Ash Human you wouldn't go attacking Humans who haven't started a fight with you, and you are not a Pikachu who breaks her word, unless it's given under coercion or the situation changes or you can convincingly fake never having given it in the first place. But Rojo came to this place with a plan and a pair of Fast Balls and two Pokemon chosen specially to beat you, and stated his intent to come after you at the gates to the Forest. He might think the fight hasn't started yet, but as far as you're concerned, it began the moment he threw down that gauntlet by bragging.
Which means he's now fair game for anything you can throw at him.
So for your first move, you wait until he's in mid-stride in front of the convenient puddle, sneak up behind him, and push lightning into your legs for a blur of movement.
You hit him in the small of his back, and your tail comes down to Shock him in the ass. At the same time, your hindpaws make contact through the thin pink pelt on his upper body, and a paralysing spasm goes through him. The sudden pain, the locked-up muscles and the force you hit him with all combine, and as he topples forward you scramble round to leap off his chest into the trees.
He lands in a muddy puddle with a splut, and you laugh mockingly at him from up on the branch you landed on. The red and pink pelts don't look so red and pink anymore, and his hair and face are caked with dirt. Well, mostly dirt.
"You... ugh... little...!" he snarls, spitting out mud and pushing himself up to his feet as soon as he can move again. "This jacket is designer, you little rat!"
You don't know what that means, but it sounds like a good excuse to laugh again as he tries to wipe his face clean and get the worst of the mud off his clothes. It won't help. That stuff is pretty soaked in there. After a moment, his patting, brushing, rubbing hands stop suddenly, and his whole posture stiffens. His eyes fall away from you down to his chest, and the anger drains away to horror.
"What? Wait... no. No no no, where is it, where is it..."
You watch, baring your teeth in delight as he falls to his knees and scrabbles in the puddle again, and finally decide to break his frantic scrabbling with another peal of laughter.
Rojo's eyes turn slowly upwards towards you, and the gleaming grey shiny you stole from the front of his pelts.
"Pii-kaa," you tell him happily, bright little fangs gleaming in your wicked grin. Your cheekpads crackle.
"Don't you dare," he warns. "That's... that's my Badge. That's my Boulder Badge! I earned that, I fought my way through Pewter Gym for it, I beat Shino for it! Give it back!"
"Chuu," you taunt, and let a few crackling arcs of electricity flicker over to it. Surprisingly, it doesn't even blacken, and you refocus on it in surprise, Shocking it harder.
"Hah!" he yells up. "Badges are given for Pokemon mastery, you dumb thing! No crummy Thunder Shock is going to break one! Now drop it and get down here, and maybe I won't go too hard on you for stealing it before I catch you!"
You consider this, and shrug.
"Chu-uuu," you sing-song, and then take the Badge into your mouth, roll onto all fours, and spring into the next tree. And the next. And the next. Rojo is shouting and running after you down below, and you keep an ear on him to make sure he doesn't pull out one of those Fast Balls... but no. Maybe he doesn't trust his aim while he's running. Or maybe he's just forgotten about them in his anger over the Badge.
Well, if he thinks he's upset now, he's going to be really unhappy when you get where you're going.
You come to a stop on a crooked stump that juts out of a shallow pond, and Rojo stumbles out of the woods to find you crouched on it on all fours, your tail in the air, your ears alert and your back arched. In front of you, his precious Boulder Badge sets precariously on the edge of the stump, hanging half-unsupported over the muddy brown water and the thick, sucking mud at the bottom.
He freezes, Fast Ball in hand, and you laugh again.
Then you take a deliberate step back, and jerk your head at him.
"Pika pika," you chirp. "Chu."
"... fine," he grits out. His face is almost as red as his pelts and the streak in his hair were, under the mud. He's covered in little scratches and welts from chasing you through whippy branches and thorny bushes, and the thin pink pelt under the red one is sodden and cold and clinging to his skin. "Fine," he repeats through clenched teeth. "I'll... I'll go. Just. Don't you dare. You win this one, whatever, but..." he falls to his knees, "just give me my Badge back." His teeth grind together like stones. "Please."
You nod in satisfaction, carefully and precisely turn around on the stump, and jump back onto the opposite shore.
And a deliberate sweep of your tail knocks the Badge off into the water as you go.
"No!" Rojo howls, and all but dives in after it. The pond is shallow, and only comes up to the bottom of his thighs, but he's on his knees trying to scrabble through the mud for it, and bent down as he is, his nose is barely above the water.
You give him a moment to see if he finds it, and then alight on the stump again, raising one paw to bat at his ear for his attention. Mad, murderous eyes come up to meet yours.
Your cheekpads crackle, and horror overtakes hatred.
The Thunder Shock makes the whole pond glow pretty colours for a moment.
It doesn't paralyse him, alas. You'd been looking forward to seeing him draped over the stump. But no, he flails and spasms and trips and gets dunked, but manages to find enough footing to make a grab for you, forcing you to retreat back to the bank. By the time he struggles back onto the shore, he's huffing and spitting with fury, the Badge lost to the mud for good in all his kicking and slipping and sliding. You stick your tongue out at him from a tree branch, and he snatches a Fast Ball off his belt and hurls it at you with an inarticulate howl of rage.
It very nearly connects. Perilously nearly. Your Thunder Shock is far stronger than it needs to be, and hits the thing only a bodylength in front of your face, forcing you to throw yourself out of the way to avoid it giving you a bloody nose as it carries on past you and vanishes into the undergrowth. You cling to the branch your hasty dive nearly made you fall from with artful panic, staring down at him wide-eyed and flattening your ears back against your skull.
He meets your gaze with twitching eyes and a grimace of utmost loathing.
"You," he snarls. "You... sadistic... vicious... awful... little rat. I am gonna make you regret the day you were born."
He grabs the two Pokeballs from his right hip and hurls them in one wide throw.
"Machop! Geodude! Pin that little monster down and beat her unconscious! You hear me? Don't stop till she's begging to be caught!"
Light vomits forth from each ball and expands into two shapes. One, bipedal, twice your height, grey-skinned and peltless with three brown crests atop its head. The other, a living rock, like the Sudowoodo you sometimes nap near, big enough around that it's as tall as you are, with angry eyes and two rocky arms clenched into fists.
Alright, fine. Maybe electrocuting a living boulder would be a bit tricky. Still. If Rojo wants to make this a fight?
You'll give him one.
Rojo thinks he has you now. How do you fight him and his minions?
[ ] With speed. Take to the trees, exploit the environment. Machop can't climb, and Geodude is pitifully slow. Make him regret underestimating your speed. [ ] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot. [ ] With help. Two against one odds just mean you have twice the available victims. Turn his Pokemon against one another and humiliate him with his own team. [ ] Why bother? This Human came here specifically to catch you, and bragged about it being easy. You've already beaten him, but your pride demands you rub it in further.
[x] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
[X] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
[x] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
[X] With help. Two against one odds just mean you have twice the available victims. Turn his Pokemon against one another and humiliate him with his own team.
We are so beautifully evil. *wipes away a tear*
A 'Machop' and a 'Geodude', huh. And the latter is immune to lightning? Well that just sounds completely unfair, not to mention highly implausible. Nothing is immune to lightning if you use enough of it; Grandpa has firmly emphasised that point to you more than once on his occasional visits.
Ah yes, the dreadful power of being descended from a protagonist and knowing that type advantages mean nothing in the face of narrative importance.
[X] With speed. Take to the trees, exploit the environment. Machop can't climb, and Geodude is pitifully slow. Make him regret underestimating your speed.
[x] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
[X] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
[X] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
[x] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
[X] With help. Two against one odds just mean you have twice the available victims. Turn his Pokemon against one another and humiliate him with his own team.
[x] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
It'd be a shame if Machop knocked Geodude into that pond there...
[X] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
"... fine," he grits out. His face is almost as red as his pelts and the streak in his hair were, under the mud. He's covered in little scratches and welts from chasing you through whippy branches and thorny bushes, and the thin pink pelt under the red one is sodden and cold and clinging to his skin. "Fine," he repeats through clenched teeth. "I'll... I'll go. Just. Don't you dare. You win this one, whatever, but..." he falls to his knees, "just give me my Badge back." His teeth grind together like stones. "Please."
You nod in satisfaction, carefully and precisely turn around on the stump, and jump back onto the opposite shore.
And a deliberate sweep of your tail knocks the Badge off into the water as you go.
I like this bit because of what it tells us about Trixie.
Specifically, at this point, she'd won. Rojo was thoroughly humiliated, damp, covered in mud, shocked by lightning, and terrified of losing his most prized possession. He was willing to back out and leave. In effect, Trixie had defeated him before the first Pokéball was thrown.
And then she decided to just be a dick and go above and beyond in making him lose his badge. And, props to her, it ruined his day even more thoroughly than it already was! But it's the point where Trixie moves past 'satisfying my pride and humiliating the asshole who strode into my forest to capture me' and into 'and kick him while he is down and after he's surrendered' and, well.
Now she gets a completely avoidable fight with a Geodude.
[X] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
[x] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
[x] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
[X] With help. Two against one odds just mean you have twice the available victims. Turn his Pokemon against one another and humiliate him with his own team.
[X] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
[X] With tools. This silly human thinks a Type advantage will work to his favour. Show him how wrong he is and use the Forest to do what your lightning cannot.
we truely are a demonic little pikachu. he probebly could still find the badge if he gives it say, a week of searching in the mud
