A Falling Sun [Kenshi Quest]

Voting is open
Compound it and make it more significant too. The next step is another customization phase from 12-18 and finally, the last one that pretty much sets up the start of the game. So basically only in this one and in the next points will be used.
Hm, so points-wise, it would be better to save at least half of the current points for the next chapter.
About the pro-skeleton, maybe it could be a part of the tech hunter path. What would pro-skeleton look like to you?
Anti-slaver acquaintance of the father who talks up Tin-fist?
Machinist Skeleton who sets up a small school in town as a way to scout potential up-and-comers (there's story potential here if chosen in addition to the Flotsam Ninja teacher)?
An ambassador of the Armour King looking to expand business out of Wend, willing to employ a little local help?
An encounter with wandering Holy Nation Robots fighting off Raptors/Fogmen/Holy Nation Inquisitors that somehow wandered too close to the village?

That last two might fall under mentor. I'm not a writer here, so honestly I'm not very good at such things. I do better at straight critique or general brainstorming. Making details and wording myself often escape me. Sorry. (Edit: Though I'm a bit bummed my little contribution about Kenshi wildlife - my attempt at clawing up near Darik's level of exposition - wasn't noticed.)

Edit2: To the questers, are you still planning for diplomacy?
 
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Hm, so points-wise, it would be better to save at least half of the current points for the next chapter.

Anti-slaver acquaintance of the father who talks up Tin-fist?
Machinist Skeleton who sets up a small school in town as a way to scout potential up-and-comers (there's story potential here if chosen in addition to the Flotsam Ninja teacher)?
An ambassador of the Armour King looking to expand business out of Wend, willing to employ a little local help?
An encounter with wandering Holy Nation Robots fighting off Raptors/Fogmen/Holy Nation Inquisitors that somehow wandered too close to the village?

That last two might fall under mentor. I'm not a writer here, so honestly I'm not very good at such things. I do better at straight critique or general brainstorming. Making details and wording myself often escape me. Sorry. (Edit: Though I'm a bit bummed my little contribution about Kenshi wildlife - my attempt at clawing up near Darik's level of exposition - wasn't noticed.)

Edit2: To the questers, are you still planning for diplomacy?

I added in a new anti-slavery event as per your suggestion and also the informational thing. Sorry, I had read it but forgot to thread mark it.
 
Alright, so here's my take on the choices.

Traits:
Per the narrative, Kira is already Curious, Greedy, and Diligent. Now, we don't want to compound any of these, since the consequences would be severely negative.

Moderate curiosity and diligence are good things. But if the plan is to lead and rebuild Deadcat, greed needs to be mitigated. So I propose the first trait of choice be Charitable. The result should be a character who won't just give out funds to anyone but makes sure to take care of her own. That attitude could actually be beneficial for a leader.

For the other two traits, I suggest Creative and Extroverted. Most of the others I can see having severe downsides. With Creative, Kira can better make use of her genius, as well as better listen to companions' ideas. With Extroverted, she can better get those companions.

Events:
We have about 10-13 points to spend, saving the rest for the final part of character creation.

First off, to keep in character, Sister treatment (1 point) should happen. Part of it already started in this chapter, so just let it continue as part of the Thicker than Water social bond chosen last round.

Next, we can continue Kira's thirst for knowledge with Numbers and Letters with Mom (1 point), which also started already in the chapter. We'll continue this trend into A visit to an old Friend (1 point), which gives us opportunities and connections for later.

Those opportunities and connections are needed due to the Socially Shunned incident. We can help mitigate this with one of two ways, with their own pros and cons:
  • Town's Lil Boss --> Child Militia (total 3 points): This makes Kira the leader of the rascals, and the connection with the militia makes them less suspicious of Kira and her family after the assassination thing.
  • Friends in the neighborhood --> Town's Sweetheart (total 3 points): This basically makes Kira the princess of Starlight. She won't be as rough and tumble, nor as connected with her peers, but she's also got more actual sway in town.
  • (optional) Town's Lil Boss + Friends in the neighborhood --> Town's Sweetheart (total 4 points): This makes Kira somewhat of a junior mafia boss, controlling the troublemakers while looking pretty and innocent for the people in charge.
Kira still needs some experience in combat; this is Kenshi, after all. If we don't go Child Militia, we'd need Guardian (1 point). This determines whether Kira is a front- or back-line commander. Of course, Suddenly A Mentor Appears (3 points) could also cover this if bossman decides on a combat-oriented mentor. I don't know how much control we'd get over mentor choice.

From here, we've spent 6-11 points. We can afford one or two more events. What should they be?

One thing to consider is having both A Holy Visit and Anti-Slavery. This combo can present interesting story opportunities.

Also, I'd like to suggest against picking Learning to fish with Dad. In character, Kira is afraid of the possibility of gurglers, even if it's highly unlikely she'd see another one so far north. Out of character, I sorta like the fear as a character flaw for story reasons. So for now she stays away from the open ocean.

I'd also suggest against Bonedog Story. I don't think the family is well-off enough to afford another mouth to feed, and I don't look forward to seeing the dog inevitably die.

What do you think?
 
Alright, so here's my take on the choices.

Traits:
Per the narrative, Kira is already Curious, Greedy, and Diligent. Now, we don't want to compound any of these, since the consequences would be severely negative.

Moderate curiosity and diligence are good things. But if the plan is to lead and rebuild Deadcat, greed needs to be mitigated. So I propose the first trait of choice be Charitable. The result should be a character who won't just give out funds to anyone but makes sure to take care of her own. That attitude could actually be beneficial for a leader.

For the other two traits, I suggest Creative and Extroverted. Most of the others I can see having severe downsides. With Creative, Kira can better make use of her genius, as well as better listen to companions' ideas. With Extroverted, she can better get those companions.

Events:
We have about 10-13 points to spend, saving the rest for the final part of character creation.

First off, to keep in character, Sister treatment (1 point) should happen. Part of it already started in this chapter, so just let it continue as part of the Thicker than Water social bond chosen last round.

Next, we can continue Kira's thirst for knowledge with Numbers and Letters with Mom (1 point), which also started already in the chapter. We'll continue this trend into A visit to an old Friend (1 point), which gives us opportunities and connections for later.

Those opportunities and connections are needed due to the Socially Shunned incident. We can help mitigate this with one of two ways, with their own pros and cons:
  • Town's Lil Boss --> Child Militia (total 3 points): This makes Kira the leader of the rascals, and the connection with the militia makes them less suspicious of Kira and her family after the assassination thing.
  • Friends in the neighborhood --> Town's Sweetheart (total 3 points): This basically makes Kira the princess of Starlight. She won't be as rough and tumble, nor as connected with her peers, but she's also got more actual sway in town.
  • (optional) Town's Lil Boss + Friends in the neighborhood --> Town's Sweetheart (total 4 points): This makes Kira somewhat of a junior mafia boss, controlling the troublemakers while looking pretty and innocent for the people in charge.
Kira still needs some experience in combat; this is Kenshi, after all. If we don't go Child Militia, we'd need Guardian (1 point). This determines whether Kira is a front- or back-line commander. Of course, Suddenly A Mentor Appears (3 points) could also cover this if bossman decides on a combat-oriented mentor. I don't know how much control we'd get over mentor choice.

From here, we've spent 6-11 points. We can afford one or two more events. What should they be?

One thing to consider is having both A Holy Visit and Anti-Slavery. This combo can present interesting story opportunities.

Also, I'd like to suggest against picking Learning to fish with Dad. In character, Kira is afraid of the possibility of gurglers, even if it's highly unlikely she'd see another one so far north. Out of character, I sorta like the fear as a character flaw for story reasons. So for now she stays away from the open ocean.

I'd also suggest against Bonedog Story. I don't think the family is well-off enough to afford another mouth to feed, and I don't look forward to seeing the dog inevitably die.

What do you think?
that plan is sound to me ,I'll vote for it.
 
I'll post up my plan after other questers chime in with their own takes. I'd just like to ask which one of the following side skills/professions people here prefer Kira to work toward?

Merchant? Builder? Thief? Ninja? Farmer?
 
Bonedog Atory actualy would be amazing to take. Boss, you fear being unable to feed them, but Bonedogs can kill the shit out of most smaller animals and early game a bonedog can Butcher most small fry characters. Properly trained a Bonedog can even keep up with mid to late game battles. They are Not weak creatures by any means!

Theres been no movement on votes. Lurker, i am probably gonna steal most of your build and and my own touches. You do excellent work, but you think to small!

We must become the child mafia militia princess of the village! with a pet doggy!
 
[X] Plan Cookie

Traits:
[X] Charitable
[X] Extroverted
[X] Creative

Events:
[X] Suddenly A Mentor Appears 3
[X] Learning to fish with Dad 1
[X] Numbers and Letters with Mom 1
[X] Errands in the Marketplace 1
[X] Town's Lil Boss 1
[X] Friends in the neighborhood 1
[X] Sister treatment 1
[X] Getting Places 1
[X] Town's Sweetheart 2
[X] A Holy Visit 1
[X] Treasure Hunter Stories 1
[X] Child Militia 2
[X] Bonedog Story 1
[X] A visit to an old Friend 1
[X] Guardian 1
[X] Anti-Slavery 1
[X] Sleight of Hand


20 points, which leaves us only 6 for next phase. hmmmm

Boss, if i pump out an omake, how many points would that grant us for the next phase? Because i have a few ideas i would not at all mind trying to write for if that can help.

The better of a foundation we build here, the more opportunities later we will have!

Also i have taken literally every Charisma boosting option in this plan. We will be the Charismatic Leader type!

Edit: Added Sleight of hand, Thievery op please don't nerf!
 
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Bonedog Atory actualy would be amazing to take. Boss, you fear being unable to feed them, but Bonedogs can kill the shit out of most smaller animals and early game a bonedog can Butcher most small fry characters. Properly trained a Bonedog can even keep up with mid to late game battles. They are Not weak creatures by any means!
Sure, bonedogs help a hell of lot early on, but I've found that bonedogs never get enough health to survive the late-game. Boneyard wolves are a different matter, but you need mods to get them as pets. And this is Kenshi! The dog will die. It might be great for drama later on, but the dog dying is one of those scenes that really hurts to watch when it happens.
 
Sure, bonedogs help a hell of lot early on, but I've found that bonedogs never get enough health to survive the late-game. Boneyard wolves are a different matter, but you need mods to get them as pets. And this is Kenshi! The dog will die. It might be great for drama later on, but the dog dying is one of those scenes that really hurts to watch when it happens.

I know. I know its hard to watch. But isn;t it better to have had the friend, and lost him, than to have never had him as a friend at all?

Also our baby dog could end up going Pack Leader at some point. Sufficiently awesome enough to go full Gandalf, summon the Pack to defend us in our hour of need!

Or hey, there's always a chance that final round would let us upgrade our Bonedoggy into a Bonewolfy!
 

About the mentor. It is a random chance. In kenshi, you don't really have much control over who you meet and you helps you and who starts stabbing you. But it is more likely to be a combat option.

Boss, if i pump out an omake, how many points would that grant us for the next phase? Because i have a few ideas i would not at all mind trying to write for if that can help.

I am going to allow 2 more omakes but they will only impact the next phase. The base for points will be 3 and possibly more depending on the effort.
 
oh boy!

Haven't had something to really smack me with the urge to write in a long, Long time. I will get to Work!

About a location in the game near and dear to my heart, one that is just..

U will see!
 
[X] Plan Future Star of Starlight
-[X] Charitable
-[X] Creative
-[X] Extroverted
-[X] Sister Treatment
-[X] Numbers and Letters with Mom
-[X] A Visit to an Old Friend
-[X] Town's Li'l Boss
--[X] Child Militia
-[X] Friends in the Neighborhood
--[X] Town's Sweetheart
-[X] Errands in the Marketplace
-[X] Sleight of Hand
-[X] Treasure Hunter Stories
-[X] A Holy Visit
-[X] Anti-Slavery
-[X] Getting Places
-[X] Bonedog Story

A total of 14 points spent, with 12 points left in the bank. Similar to Darik's, ingratiates Kira to everyone possible (@Darik29 missed the homeless and the refugees), prevents later canine-related heartbreak, and saves more points for next round of character creation. My proposal notably misses out on a mentor, but that was pretty unpredictable anyways.

Edit: @Darik29 @Murtox @Sir_Travelsalot @Wardragon @Aztez Fan @Kufufu
Thanks to the omake Darik29 wrote below, I've been emotionally blackmailed into editing my plan. I just can't ignore characterization and plot consistency, even at the expense of efficient character building.

So now, Kira will get her dog. I'll even throw in the sneaking option, because that's the only way in my mind that she could have possibly found that pup and brought it back. I'm going to rationalize it as Kira wanting alone-time from time to time since she usually has to interact with so many people every day. I can only hope bossman lets Kira train the pup during her Child Militia sparring session. This way, the dog will be stronger, less likely to die, and better able to control its strength when it's grown.

But that is absolutely all. We're now spending 16 points, with 10 points left in the bank. We need to save points for the next phase, because that determines what we actually can do at the start. 10 points likely will barely enough to get us what we want.

@Murtox mentioned that 2 omakes would be allowed to increase possible points. Darik wrote one. If anyone is here is good at writing, I hope you can help out.

If any of you think this is the wrong choice, feel free to create another vote option without those two.
 
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Uh boss? I have everything on your list. What did i miss beyond Sleight of Hand? What homeless and refugee option?

also omake is started! Story time in the dark of night, while a great storm rages across the ocean!
 
Uh boss? I have everything on your list. What did i miss beyond Sleight of Hand? What homeless and refugee option?

also omake is started! Story time in the dark of night, while a great storm rages across the ocean!
Sleight of Hand is the homeless/refugee option. Per the description, Kira helps them out when few others would, and in exchange they teach her some skills.
 
Fair enough! Added to the list.

also, Omake!

Kenshi: A Tale of Storms



It was a stormy night in the village of Starlight. The winds howled across the coast, great waves marking the shore. A rarity, the village elders knew. The great storms came once a decade if that, but this was potentially a precursor to one of those terrible storms.

Huddled close together in the dark of there home, the small family gathered around the fire pit for warmth.

"Mama? Have you ever seen a storm before?"

Young Kirakira asked into the chill. Even with the fire pit for warmth the air was cold, and talk was all they could really do to keep warm.

Kumo knew her child was smart. Kira had proven time and again, from learning her letters and numbers to organizing the village's children into there own tiny militia. There was even that tiny scrap of fur and bone currently curled up in her lap, the pup she had rescued a day earlier from the shoreline. Kira was smart, but she was still a child. She had never experienced a storm before, not really.

"Well, dear heart. There are a few places I have been, that have had storms hit. This may look bad here, but if we were further up the coast, these shallow waves would be much worse."

Kira gasped in disbelief. Little Lim joined her, the young one following along with her sister. Kumo couldn't help but coo over how adorable her children were, and lost a few minutes simply cuddling her adorable baby girls, her husband beside her.
Eventually though, her adorable little genius wormed her way out of the blankets and stared up at her, determined. Kumo giggled at the look on her daughter's face. Such determination!

"Alright, alright. Do you remember the map in Green Finger's house? The one that shows the shape of the world?"

Kira nodded, her head bobbling up and down at speed. It was adorable enough to earn another hug, though this time her baby girl was far too excited to hold still.

"Yes, well. If you look at that map, our village is right in the center of two other stretches of land. That means we only ever see the mildest efforts pf the great storms. Thats how we can live here, so close to the coast. We are sheltered from the worst of the storms, and with that shelter we find prosperity."

Kira seemed to think about that for a moment, biting her lips in the manner of thinkers everywhere. When she turned her face back up to Kumo, she couldn't help but coo at the look of curiosity in her eyes.
"If we get the smallest storm, then whats it look like everywhere else?"

At that, Kumo had to sigh. Her daughter was relentless once she had a thought, and no deflection would shake her so easily. Settling deeper into the blankets, Kumo began her story. About places far, far away and much more grand, and terrifying, than here.
.........

If tales of storms are what you seek, dear heart, then i shall give them to you.



The storms of the Northern Coast are mild yes, but don't let that fool you. Even here, the storms can raise the water far back, surrounding us with a small sea. Why do you think our village is set upon this small mesa? Why our walls are so high and thick, beyond the raids of the Cannibals? Shelter against the storm, and the mighty winds that herald it.



But you wish to hear of other places, and other storms. I have not traveled as far as some, but i have heard tales of truly amazing places. The southern coast is a much wilder place, the sea there contending with high cliffs and mountains. This causes the Storms there to split, east and west. The Western storms are something else then, rolling through the southern Bonefields and covering up the Hook. It is a place where great storms can be felt every year, covering the land in water. There the storms can last for days, even weeks, and leave all miserably wet and chill. Be careful if you should ever find yourself there, the ground becomes treacherous and unstable the wetter things get. Stay in the city if you can, its safer than being out in a storm on your own.



Other storms...



Well, while i have never been there myself, i have seen the endless storm that rages across the Deadlands. If you should ever find yourself travelling the center of the island, take care. The endless rains across the dead lands are filled with burning acid, and can melt the skin from your bones in a matter of minutes! Only the most foolish or desperate travel through there, and only those who have made well there preparations can hope to ravel there unharmed. Be careful too, of the old world that sleeps there. The ground is just as treacherous as the storm, covered in pits and dips filled with acid from the endless storm. And the iron spiders...



That is a tale for another day, little one. You wished to hear about storms, did you not?



To the east, in the heart of the United Cities, there is the Great Desert. Though no water falls from the sky there, it has some of the most dangerous storms of all, even compared to all others. Great billowing gales of wind tear through the desert, and drags great clouds of sand with them. The Sand Storm is a most vicious thing, filling your eyes with pain and destroying all sight. Without the proper protection, you could fall off a sand dune, or stumble into a Skimmer nest, all because of the roaring sands. If you ever find yourself in those dunes, find shelter little one. And be wary of strangers! The Empire is a cruel place, and the slightest sign of weakness can lead to much worse things. I will tell you more when you are older, cub.



Where else....



Well, while I haven't been there myself, there are books about expeditions into the Ashlands. Those even beginning the attempt must deal with the endless ash clouds, constantly falling upon the ground there. None are certain as to where it comes from, exactly, but that is how the ashlands earned its name. Covered in ash, that constantly falls from the sky.



And finally...



To the north of us, there is the Leviathan Coast. A more beautiful land, I have never seen. The ground was painted so many colors, and the sky shine during the evenings! But there too is one of the most exposed areas of the island. And there, constant storms can be found. That land has no shelter, the mountains there acting only as defense for us down here in our coast. There, the storms can grow to massive things, the waves raising up taller than the tallest building in town! It was terrifying to witness, at first.



But it is also the home of the Leviathan's, those massive creatures. While we hid at the top of a mountain, I could see a small family of them stnading near the base. They almost seemed to enjoy the waves and the rain, merely staying near the mountain to avoid the worst of the wind. It was incredible to watch, little one!



Ah, but those are all the storms ai know of. Maybe one day you will find new storms, to tell me about?


...
Kira settled down at the end of the story, thinking. For a few minutes at least the small family huddled close, Kumo and Foto resting together as there daughters snuggled closer beneath the blankets. The fire crackled merrily in its small pit, blazing brightly in the dark. Pushing away the memories of things her story had drawn to the surface.

As Kumo was about to nod off, likely to yet another nightmare, her baby girl wiggled upright again. The movement seemed to rouse the pup in her lap, and shortly Kumo watched as the two held a starring contest.

Kumo hadn't said no when Kira had brought the small bit of fluff in. No creature so small should be left to fend for themselves, especially one abandoned by its mother. But Bone Dogs aren't normally tame, and even a baby can be dangerous in the right circumstances.

Before she can do more than finger her knife, her incredible daughter leaned down and kissed the pup on its snout. The beast looked utterly confused, and that look caused Kira to start giggling again. Apparently the kiss also broke the stare, because the tiny pup curled back up in Kira's lap and immediately went to sleep.

Sharing a look with Foto, Kumo couldn't help the grin spreading across her face. Their daughter had a way about her, and had managed to earn some small approval from the bone dog. A rare skill, but even more, a true blessing. Bone Dogs were loyal companions, and having one to guard there daughter very nearly guarantee's she shall live to grow up.

As Kira turned away from the small scrap of fluff in her lap, Kumo almost sighed at the look of wonder on her daughter's face. There was an innocence there, the child like wonder of the world that so many people forgot as they grew. Something she herself had forgotten, in the rush to save her father.

Kumo loved these moments the most, if she were being honest. Her children, so small and cute, such innocence that the world had not been able to take from them...

She would do everything in her power to see it thrive. That sparkle in her daughter's eye, the honest joy at the world's wonders.

She knew then, that Kira would not stay in the village. That joy, that sparkle, she knew it intimately. She had seen that same sparkle in the eyes of the greatest Tech Hunter's, those who traveled the breadth of the known world.

Truly, her child would be in for interesting times...


And Kumo could hardly wait to hear about all of them.


Notes:

This turned out far different than what i thought it would. Instead of a story about a place i love, it became a story about the many storms that wrack the island. Kenshi is an island continent, and a smallish one at that. Storms are a common issue for them, surrounded on all sides as they are by water.

And then i had the thought. A curious girl, unwilling to let go of the bone they had in regards to Storms.

What storms are there, in the land of Kenshi? And what storms will our little girl cause, as she grows?

food for thought, friends
 
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There was even that tiny scrap of fur and bone currently curled up in her lap, the pup she had rescued a day earlier from the shoreline.
The movement seemed to rouse the pup in her lap, and shortly Kumo watched as the two held a starring contest.

Kumo hadn't said no when Kira had brought the small bit of fluff in. No creature so small should be left to fend for themselves, especially one abandoned by its mother. But Bone Dogs aren't normally tame, and even a baby can be dangerous in the right circumstances.

Before she can do more than finger her knife, her incredible daughter leaned down and kissed the pup on its snout. The beast looked utterly confused, and that look caused Kira to start giggling again. Apparently the kiss also broke the stare, because the tiny pup curled back up in Kira's lap and immediately went to sleep.

Sharing a look with Foto, Kumo couldn't help the grin spreading across her face. Their daughter had a way about her, and had managed to earn some small approval from the bone dog. A rare skill, but even more, a true blessing. Bone Dogs were loyal companions, and having one to guard there daughter very nearly guarantee's she shall live to grow up.
Wow, you're really leaning into the Bonedog option, aren't you? By putting this cute scene into the omake, you're hoping to force it in, aren't you?
 
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It is SO FLUFFFEEEHHH!!!

Also! My reasoning is in the post! Bone Dogs are loyal to there owners, and are a hefty plus on making sure a child can live long enough to grow up!

but mostly it is cute and smol and we might just get the option to make it a Bone Wolf!
 
but mostly it is cute and smol and we might just get the option to make it a Bone Wolf!
Boneyard wolves have a very distinctive red coat compared to common bonedogs. I don' think we would be able to just up and change its breed in the middle of the story, you know. And even if it ends up being an option somehow, I'm sure it'll be expensive, considering wolves are a good deal stronger than dogs. Hell, elder wolves are big enough to ride on.

Come to think of it, I didn't mention the wolves or the swamp raptors as the stronger variants of their creature type in the informational. @Murtox Should I have?
 
Thanks to the omake Darik29 wrote below, I've been emotionally blackmailed into editing my plan. I just can't ignore characterization and plot consistency, even at the expense of efficient character building.

So now, Kira will get her dog. I'll even throw in the sneaking option, because that's the only way in my mind that she could have possibly found that pup and brought it back. I'm going to rationalize it as Kira wanting alone-time from time to time since she usually has to interact with so many people every day.

But that is absolutely all. We're now spending 16 points, with 10 points left in the bank. We need to save points for the next phase, because that determines what we actually can do at the start. 10 points likely will barely enough to get us what we want.
I'm fine with this.
 
Uh, boss? Gm said that an average omake would net us 3 points minimum, with better ones earning more points. So take that into consideration for planning! Also why i was willing to go down to five points in my plan, with even two average omakes we would be back up to to 11 points for the final chargen!

and i hope my omake isn't considered merely average!

Second omake will be started soon, need to get lunch first!
 
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