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WannaBee (Worm/Hazbin Hotel)

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You know, if Khepri takes over the "ultraviolence against people messing with Charlie" role... Then we might very well see Vaggie having to curb Taylor's excesses. Meaning Vaggie might become a voice of moderation. Meaning Vaggie might become nonviolent... Meaning she's redeemed and can ascend to heaven.
 
Loving this so far. Some headcannons:

1. The purge isn't to "reduce overpopulation". That's just a cover and it doesn't make sense. Hell has been confirmed to have non-city areas like jungles, deserts, etc and the inhabitants are immortal.

If they needed more living space, they can just expand out to uninhabited areas or expand vertically with tall buildings or underground dwellings. Also, they can't die, so stuffing hell with people till they just start piling on top of eachother and outstrip the food supply wouldn't do anything except make Hell slightly more shitty.

Edit: Also, as far as food goes, they clearly are okay with cannibalism. So running out of food shouldn't be an issue so long as there are other demons to nom. Those egg guys in particular look pretty edible, fry them up and if they respawn or regenerate then fry them again. If you want other food then either pay or enslave some demons to farm crops.

2. The angels were prepping for Armageddon. The day when God unleashes his armies and wrath upon the Earth to kill all the sinners and nonbelievers.

The angels shown in the intro were all sporting slasher smiles and their job entails slaughtering civilians in an urban environment. My guess is the purge is at least partially meant as a way to give those angels of death some "practice" until God needs them to bring about the End of Days.

Golden Morning may have put some wrenches in those plans.

3. Radio Demon is powerful because he makes deals for souls. Vaggie mentioned that he's a "dealmaker", he really wanted to get a handshake on his deal, and he was shown able to casually summon people to help out at the Hotel. There were also those shadow figures.

My guess is that making deals for souls makes a demon more powerful and it's possible humans can make such deals before they actually die. So Radio Demon could have been collecting souls even before he died, which would be why he was so powerful when he manifest.

Even if he was just handing out cold beers to alchoholics willing to sign soul contracts, that might have been enough to make him exceptionally powerful. After that, he could keep making deals in Hell for more power or the Lols.

4. Going on the above, it's possible that Taylor's power level, and sin level might possibly been due to her going Khephri and mind-jacking all those parahumans. It's not impossible that her shard somehow tapped into the soul contract clause (we know Teacher has his deal with the devil Schick and his control is less refined than Khephri's full access to mind and body).

So Taylor might have accidentally up and stolen a few thousand souls, or at least made connections enough to tap into the effect. This would also explain the sin counter melting since soul bargains or theft would likely carry a higher sin weight than murder as far as celestial types would be concerned.
 
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It's going to be interesting if they start talking about what year was it that they all die considering Vaggie died in 2014 while Taylor died in 2013.
 
guisniperman said:
Actually unless killed with Angelic weaponry death doesn't stick for long in hell. It's kinda a pecking order kinda thing. Also there better be some damm Maple Sirup in the Canada part of hell otherwise it's not Canada.
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considering this is DOOMGUY and blackmarket Angel weapons are a thing, somehow I don't think he's going to have a problem with making death stick should be want to
 
VirtualFox said:
Wouldn't the lack of honest to doG Maple Syrup, make it a Canadian Hell?
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True but the thing is that the Canadians called that peculiar part Canada. No true Canadian would do such thing if there was no Maple Syrup. But considering what they said about the meat, there's probably no Canadian Bacon or Jerky which is a true loss but ultimately not enough to not call the place Canada if Maple Syrup is avaiable.
 
Wait, is Alec in Canadian hell? Oh god is his father in Canadian Hell?!!
Suddenly I'm very worried about little body jacker child... unless he decides to do heartbreak escape part 2; Vasil Boogaloo and head to regular hell.
 
@RavensDagger

Any plans to cross-post or otherwise link the omakes from SB for those who haven't seen them? Also, the link to the morality thread appears to be broken. Is this an actual problem or just me?
 
I now reaaaallly want to see Khepri in this outfit because this sounds rad as hell. (Pun intended) and...

Jamie Roberts said:
Look, if they're going to be adversarial, Klingon theology is only appropriate. Deicide is like treason: It's only against the rules if you lose. Just ask Zeus.
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This is a wonderful summation of my feelings on the matter.
 
Greetings

Taylor waited behind the front desk as the man entered the lobby. She hadn't met him before, but she knew his reputation. The only part of it that she cared about was that he wouldn't cause trouble.

"Mr. Wick."

"Skitter. Or is it Weaver? I heard you changed your name."

"It's Khepri, now."

"Have you seen my wife? Do you know where she is?"

"I haven't, and I don't, though I'll keep a few thousand eyes out, and ask around for you. Would you like a room?"

John Wick slid a gold coin across the counter, "Yes, please. Is the sommelier in?"

"This isn't the Continental, but the local villains have a habit of leaving things behind. I'll show you my collection. You can have them for free if you help defend the Hotel."

"Continental rules?"

"Yes. I think that'd be fitting for a hotel dedicated to the redemption of demons."

"Deal."

"Welcome to the Happy Hotel. You'll be in Room 326, Mr. Wick. I hope you enjoy your stay."
 
guisniperman said:
But considering what they said about the meat, there's probably no Canadian Bacon or Jerky which is a true loss but ultimately not enough to not call the place Canada if Maple Syrup is avaiable.
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If they are Canadians than they have ham, bacon and other longpork products like Jerky. Because Canadians knows human flesh tastes just like pork (can you say prolific serial-killer with a pig farm? I knew you could). I kinda wish I was joking.
 
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Chapter Six
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    • [Moderator Note: As a disclaimer, this chapter contains a slur. CW for Transphobia]

    Chapter Six

    Charlie bounced her papers on her lap to make sure they were all nice and neat and tidy, then looked up and to her... was client the word for two demons before her? Maybe patients would be more appropriate.

    In either case, she met the eyes of first one potential-redemption-success-story, then the other. Khepri didn't even blink, she just sat primly on her chair in her absolutely adorable concierge outfit, hands on her lap and attention all on Charlie.

    The other patient was slouched way back in his couch, head tilted back to stare at the ceiling and one of his four arms tapping a rap-tap-tap beat on the back of his seat. She smiled at him and sorta wished that he would be paying just a bit more attention.

    Angel Dust was the find of a unlifetime. Not only was he a super high profile demon, he was also not the sort of person anyone would suspect to be capable of redeeming himself. It was why, after learning from Vaggie that the pornstar was looking for a place to stay, she was quick to invite him to one of the Happy Hotel's suites on a few conditions.

    She didn't exactly expect the spidery pornstar to accept, but here he was, sitting in her therapy room ready to get therapized. Therapied... spoken to.

    "W-well, I guess we should begin?" she asked.

    Angel Dust groaned. Khepri blinked, and Vaggie, wonderful beautiful Vaggie gave her a subtle thumbs up and an uncertain smile.

    Charlie smiled, puffed out her chest and began. "Welcome to the Happy Hotel's first ever group therapy session!" she announced.

    "Are you a certified therapist?" came Khepri's tiny voice.

    "Questions at the end please." She smiled harder. "I thought it would be nice if we went around and introduced ourselves. Just... four things. Your name, a bit about yourself now, and a bit about your past. And your hope for the future!"

    She waited for volunteers. Then waited a few seconds more.

    The clock in the corner tick-ticked.

    "Well, how about I go first?" she asked rhetorically. "My name is Charlie Magne. I'm the Princess of Hell and proud owner of the first ever rehabilitation hotel in Hell. Um, my past is pretty simple. I was born in Hell with two great parents. Great ish. Okay parents. They tried their best. Anyway. My mom is Lilith, queen of the monsters and my dad is Lucifer the Fallen." She smiled wider at the slight tilt of Khepri's head and the way she blinked twice in under a minute. She was paying attention! Angel Dust was still staring at the ceiling, but he wasn't groaning at least. "Uh, my dreams for the future are..." she looked at Vaggie from the corner of her eye and her perfect girlfriend gave her an encouraging smile. She flushed. She couldn't say anything like that while Vaggie was right there. "Are, uh, to help so many demons that we don't need to be purged every year!"

    She clapped as she finished, but soon stopped when she realized she was the only one doing it. With a cough, she looked at her notes, then back at her patients. "So, who wants to go next?"

    The clock tick-tocked.

    "V-Vaggie, how about you show our guests how it's done?" Vaggie shook her head, but Charlie pleaded with her eyes and Vaggie softened under the look.

    "Fine," she muttered. "Everyone calls me Vaggie," she began.

    "I betch'a you like it more when the princess screams it," Angel Dust said.

    Vaggie glared at him. "I'm Salvadorian. Came here because I was a bit too much of a whore when I was alive." She shrugged one shoulder and swept her pretty white hair out of her face. "As for the future... I want to see Charlie succeed. What happens after is whatever."

    Charlie beamed, her tummy nice and warm and fuzzy, as if she'd eaten a whole litter of kittens. "Thank you Vaggie! Angel, since you spoke up, how about you go next?"

    "Fuck me," the spider demon said before he languidly moved all four arms around, pushed himself up in his seat, then crossed his legs one over the other. "I'm Angel Dust, baby. Hottest thing to come out of the west side of the Pentagram. Number one best selling male-on-whatever pornstar in the last decade. Yadda yadda, you know how it goes." He waved two hands in little circles as if to dismiss whatever he'd just said.

    "I do not," Khepri said. She was eyeing him now. "What about your dreams for the future?"

    "You mean besides surviving this damned... season?" He smirked, then melted into his seat and with a quick, rather limber twirl, ended up upside down with both legs over the top of the seat. "I don't know, sweetheart, but give me enough cash and I'll make all of yours come true." He blew Khepri a kiss.

    Charlie didn't know if that was a good sign or not, but she made note of it anyway. "Okay, thank you for sharing Angel. Now, Khepri, you're pretty new to Hell, so what's your story?"

    Khepri was silent for a few tick-ticks of the clock, then nodded as if to herself. "I have had many names. Taylor was my first, but then the Warlord Skitter, then Weaver, then finally, before I died they called me Khepri. I don't care much for it, but I suppose I deserve the name." She looked down for a moment, then back up. "A fun fact about me is that I really like bugs."

    She stared at Charlie for a few more tick-ticks. "As for my dreams of the future... I don't think I belong in Hell. What I did might have been wrong, but I did it for the right reasons. So I will fight to redeem myself. And if they won't let me into heaven..." She trailed off and her eyes narrowed. "I'll find another way in."

    "Oh-kay!" Charlie didn't want to discourage her little butterflies just yet, especially not Angel Dust who was so new to their little family. "Well then, how about we go in a circle and we can talk about, uh, what we think our biggest faults are?"

    Khepri tilted her head just a little and seemed to think on that. Angel Dust sighed and scratched at his poofy chest and Vaggie gave her a thumbs up with her other hand held up her phone and scrolled through MySpace.

    "I'll begin!" Charlie decided. Taking the initiative was always important, her dad used to say. Even though he mostly meant the saying to be used about assassinating political dissidents, but it probably applied to this too. "I think that I'm a little bit of a ditz sometimes, and that I might forget to believe in myself sometimes. Now you, Angel."

    "My biggest fault?" the pornstar asked, head tilted all the way back so that he was looking at her upside-down. "Well, I'm pretty sure I could have participated in that gang land gang bang last year, but all those Canadians on the scene had me nervous. Prolly should work on that."

    "Ah, that's, nice?" Charlie said. She looked down at her notes to see what they said. There was a tiny scribble that looked like Angel Dust with an arrow pointing to a basket full of kittens. That helped. "Very nice. What about you, Khepri?"

    "I... think I might jump to escalating issues a bit too quickly," Khepri admitted silently. "Perhaps less force used with greater precision could have the same effects with less collateral." She shook her head. "Or maybe I could just take this for the vacation it is."

    That... was a start! "Excellent." She nodded along for a moment. "I'm so proud of all of you, and I'm sure that in no time at all we'll all be skipping along the road of redemption, petting puppy dogs and singing on rainbows."

    Angel Dust gagged.

    "And," Charlie continued. "I think that's enough for today. Next time we can talk about our favourite fluffy things and how we think we can redeem ourselves from all the itty bitty bad things we've done."

    "Wait, is that it?" Angel said as he spun around and planted his feet on the ground. "Fucking thank Christ."

    Charlie smiled at him. "Come on now, that wasn't so bad was it? And we'll only have two sessions a day. Maybe next time we can talk about swearing and why is so not cool beans."

    Angel Dust stared at her and blinked slowly. "I'm still getting the room for free, yeah?" he asked.

    "Of course," she said. "Redemption is its own reward."

    He huffed and started walking out. "Right. Well at least it's not as dirtying as some of the other shit I've done for a place to sleep." He left the room, the door clicking shut behind him.

    Charlie crumpled onto her seat. "I did horribly, didn't I?" she whispered.

    "Hey, hey, I thought you did... okay," Vaggie said as she moved over to start patting her on the back.

    "Have you ever actually attend therapy before?" Khepri asked.

    Charlie wiped at her eyes and looked up into her newest employee's stoic visage. "Not really."

    Khepri nodded. "I see. Perhaps shifting the focus away from what a person did wrong to why they did it would be best. Then you can talk through the chain of events and pinpoint where things started going wrong."

    Vaggie hummed. "That's surprisingly insightful."

    "I've been to therapy before," Khepri said.

    "I don't doubt it," Vaggie replied.

    Charlie looked up from her slump. "Do you think you could look at my notes and maybe help?" she asked, a kernel of hope sprouting in her chest.

    Khepri blinked, them moved a hand out before her.

    That was assent enough for Charlie who pushed her noted into the girl's hands. Khepri brought them up and studied them, then turned the page, then turned it again before looking up. "These are just drawings of cats and dogs and rainbows."

    "Yeah, isn't that the end goal?" Charlie said. "My dad always said 'you can't take what you want if you don't know what you want.'"

    "That's certainly advice," Khepri said. "Maybe instead of focusing on the eventual end goal, focus on the steps to get there?"

    "Like buying a basketful of kittens for everyone to play with? I wish we could get puppies to play with too."

    Khepri blinked again. "No. Definitely not like that." She frowned. "Why couldn't you get puppies?"

    "No dogs in hell," Charlie explained with a sigh.

    Vaggie placed a hand on Charlie's shoulder, and like the bestest girlfriend ever, gave her a good squeeze. "I think what Khepri means is that we should work on little steps. Take things one thing at a time."

    "Well, yeah," Charlie said. "Angel Dust won't stop being a pornstar after just one meeting. It'll take work, and attention, and lots of love." She frowned. "But not that kind of love."

    Khepri nodded. "Yes. By the way, who is Angel Dust. Beyond a pornstar spider person thing."

    Vaggie rolled her eyes. "Just some wanna be dipshit whose head is too big for his own good. But some degenerates like seeing him get fucked online, so he struck it big. Traps are in right now."

    "Traps?"

    "Vaggie," Charlie warned. "We're trying to help Khepri, not corrupt her even more."

    Khepri raised two hands in surrender. "I was just curious. He's setting up a pole in his room as we speak. Also, he brought a pig with him. A literal pig. I am not sure what the hotel's rules say about that."

    "It's... probably fine?" Charlie asked. "Maybe you should go see if he needs help moving in and stuff? It's kind of part of your job, right?"

    Khepri nodded. "Okay," she said before turning on her heel and walking out.

    Charlie sighed as soon as she was out of the room, then brought her arms up. "This is harder than I thought. I think I could use a cuddle."

    Vaggie rolled her eye, but she didn't refuse. Because cuddles were the best thing. "You'll figure it out, Charlie. I trust you."

    "I hope so," Charlie said.

    ***

    And so Angel slips into the story, not with a bang or a whisper, but with a moan.

    And, of course a huge thank-you to my Patreons for helping bounce ideas on the Discord and for encouraging me to post this monstrosity!

    Also, check out the tons of awesome fanart in the Media thread!
     
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