Yes but i think what you're failing to see is that you've just entered a world far more ridiculous than you're own. So ridiculousness is only so ridiculous here.
[X] Dollars
[X] Half-cafe scolded almond-milk latte, 4 pumps vanilla, 1 pump cinnamon with an extra half shot, sweetened with Agave nectar at 167 degrees with room for cream
[X] Is a bit erratic. She's good at what she does though, but she tends to leave in a few fail safes even for her own team. Been burned too many times to make that mistake again, I suppose.
[X] Obnoxious. He tends to chat incessantly while driving, so much that it becomes difficult to even think, let alone speak. You'll find yourself constantly wanting to push him out of the vehicle.
[X] Dollars
[X] Half-cafe scolded almond-milk latte, 4 pumps vanilla, 1 pump cinnamon with an extra half shot, sweetened with Agave nectar at 167 degrees with room for cream
[X] Is a bit erratic. She's good at what she does though, but she tends to leave in a few fail safes even for her own team. Been burned too many times to make that mistake again, I suppose.
[X] Quiet. He doesn't say much, doesn't give much input, and doesn't really say anything even if you say something to him. He's a bit difficult to work with, as you can't really coordinate with someone who doesn't say anything.[X] Inconspicuous
[X] Persuasion
[X] Infiltration
[X] Dollars
[X] Half-cafe scolded almond-milk latte, 4 pumps vanilla, 1 pump cinnamon with an extra half shot, sweetened with Agave nectar at 167 degrees with room for cream
[X] Is a bit erratic. She's good at what she does though, but she tends to leave in a few fail safes even for her own team. Been burned too many times to make that mistake again, I suppose.
[X] Quiet. He doesn't say much, doesn't give much input, and doesn't really say anything even if you say something to him. He's a bit difficult to work with, as you can't really coordinate with someone who doesn't say anything.
*feverishly refreshes quest in hopes of it updating then realizes that I am in fact the one that's supposed to update it*
So, a quick update about the update rate of our updates(face), I'll be taking over as primary QM for the next couple of weeks, as Sendi will be exceedingly busy and he needs all the spare time he can get not writing quest.
At this point the votes are closed and you can expect an update tomorrow afternoon.
[X] Dollar (With no indication as to from what country, as the dollar is a currency used in multiple countries around the world, but I'll assume it's america)
[X] Is a bit erratic. She's good at what she does though, but she tends to leave in a few fail safes even for her own team. Been burned too many times to make that mistake again, I suppose.
[X] Quiet. He doesn't say much, doesn't give much input, and doesn't really say anything even if you say something to him. He's a bit difficult to work with, as you can't really coordinate with someone who doesn't say anything.
[X] Inconspicuous
[X] Persuasion
[X] Infiltration
[X] Half-cafe scolded almond-milk latte, 4 pumps vanilla, 1 pump cinnamon with an extra half shot, sweetened with Agave nectar at 167 degrees with room for cream
A/N: So this has been one really long afternoon, but here it is, the contents of my brain spewed upon this public forum in the form of numbers and code, translated to letters and statements.
-
"Obviously I'll be the one gaining access to the vault. So how is it we're going to get the money out of there?" You ask, having done your fair share of heists. Normally walking out with a sack full of cash is a problem, so having a plan to where the money was going to be brought was always appropriate. Thinking it over, you look at the floor layout of the bank and think that it looks rather straightforward. The entrance was small, and the whole bank was nestled in between other buildings. You immediately think that knocking out the walls might be your way out of there. Inconspicuous gain at rank Novice
Infiltration gained at rank C
Persuasion gained at rank D
"The plan is to teleport out." He says simply, and you can't believe it's that simple to rob a bank here! He'll probably go on an explanation about how here in the astral sea the mind has more room for mental development than the normal world, and that abilities that otherwise defy the logic of reality are commonplace. However instead of explaining this he glances at you before bursting into laughter. "Wait you took me seriously? No, we're going to have to do this the hard way. We'll be busting out the walls." You can't help but feel like he's the biggest asshole alive, but you're not sure you want to elevate him to that kind of status.
Standing and walking to the door, you think to yourself that he's about to leave for some weird reason, before he opens the door, and three people walk inside. Odd, you didn't hear anyone knocking. What's even more odd is the fact that there's a snake person, a person made of water, and a man who's skin and hair are white as snow. You're not sure what's up with any of this, but it's actually not the strangest thing you've seen so far. Introducing you to all of them, he stands and points at each of them individually.
"This is Fang, our systems specialist. She'll make sure that we have the time to get in undetected." He says, looking at the snake woman. She sighs, very reptilian sounding, and curls up on the couch, the bottom of her body being a muscular snake tail, the top being very damn you fireaxis, now every snakewoman in my mind is a waifu to me! humanoid, her hoody only showing slight bits of scale here and there. If she had her hood concealing her face, you probably wouldn't even be able to tell she was a snake person.
[] Ask her about snake people
[] Respect her privacy as a snake person, and don't trigger her. Probably because she most likely has poison spit.
[] Make casual references to snakes and hope she picks up on the fact that you're uncomfortable with snake people being a thing.
Before you can have much time to talk to her, you are introduced to the water man as "Thomas" or the driver of this little op, cooly sitting in his chair and checking his phone. You can only assume his case is water proof. He simply nods his head and makes a watery kind of noise as his neck vibrates. Probably a noise of affirmation, you figure. Wonder if he would fit in a bucket...
You wonder about all of the water based shenanigans to be had with this watery man, before being snapped out of your daze as he introduces you to all of them. "And this is..."
[] Name
You bow in front of this group, and grandly stand up. If there were wind in here and you had a cape on, you'd think it would have been perfect. However neither of those criteria were met, and you were instead left to boring old impressions. Sitting back down and crossing your legs, Sam looks to the last person. "And this is Sendicard, Sendi for short." QM intrusion Ho!
The man is pale, his pink eyes giving way to the fact that he's probably an albino. Poor thing. However he has a sharpness in his eyes that makes you uneasy. "Sendi here will play security. If anything goes wrong, he'll make sure it dies quickly." He says briefly, and Sendi merely nods. So many quiet people in this one room is making you uneasy? Doesn't anyone here know how to be FABULOUS?
But the plan is quickly explained to you as everybody listens as well. Sam plays the mastermind in this little play of his, and you know just how much he loves that role. He's the only one who's ever been as FABULOUS as you are. Except you're much more FABULOUS than him and he should just accept that as a fact of life already.
"Fang and Thomas, You'll be waiting in the van for the rest of the team, you're job is to make sure they get out of there without too many kinks. Sendi, you'll be waiting close by." He finishes, being oddly vague about his instructions to Sendi. Suppose he just knows what to do then? "So now that we know what we're doing, time for prep!" Oh right, you forgot that a proper heist required *gasp* time and precision put into it!
"The items we need are sixfold, but we should be able to do it without a kink. Since we have the interceptors to deal with, we need a defense against them should they be a problem. There's supposedly a frequency that the banks use to control them. Based on a few bits of info I've gotten, it's being held at at a tech lab downtown. It's a small place, nothing that should pose a problem for you all." He says, stretching as he stood, walking back into the small kitchen and making another cup of coffee.
Fang is the first one to speak. "Do you expect us all to go there?" She asks, her eyes narrowing at Sam as he sips his coffee. "Why would all of us need to go to something that's supposedly a cake walk?" She asks, her suspicion leaking into her tone.
"Go alone, or go together, I don't really care. You can play rock-paper-scissors over who gets the thing for all I care. But things are always easier with a good team to have your back." And with that Sam pulls his cloak from off of the coat rack, slipping on that unnerving mask of his.
"Wait, where are you going Sam?" You ask, as you realize he's just bossing you all around and reaping the rewards afterwards.
"I'm off to take care of the other five things we need." nevermind.
----
Now who's going to that lab to grab the thingie?
Multiple able to be selected
[] Fang
[] Akima Thomas
[] Sendi(card)
[] You
-
(optional)
How does it get decided?
[] Rock-paper-scissors
[] civil conversation
[] ???
[] The pet rock
[] Write in
You immediately think that knocking out the walls might be your way out of there. Inconspicuous gain at rank Novice
Infiltration gained at rank C
Persuasion gained at rank D
[X] Respect her privacy as a snake person, and don't trigger her. Probably because she most likely has poison spit.
[X] Marvelously Artful Robber In Aether, or Maria for short.
I'll never understand the appeal of snek as waifus.
Never.
Also, since we gave SAM this treatment, we might as well be the best robber everywhere and anywhere (Aether makes up everything, hence, everywhere.)
[X] Sendi(card)
Let the QM handle it! I'm sure it'll turn out fine.
[X] A raunchy game of Snek and Ladders. Winner has to go grab the thing.
Speaking of, there's actual context beyond just "QM Intrusion, HO!" It was a pre-existing character I made after your dear QM's own moniker, and I decided to recycle him after about 5 years of being left on the backburner.
I was trying to allude to the fact that you never actually chose who would go. The vote on how they choose is just that, how. It says absolutely nothing about the who. And furthermore
The snakes aren't actually overlords. They're not even all that important in the hierarchy of the aliens plans. They're just kinda there because snek waifus. Do you even XCOM?
Honestly neither do I, but it probably has something to do with the predatory features of the Viper, which human men find attractive for odd reasons. And it's probably the vaguely feminine features of the viper alongside that.
I was trying to allude to the fact that you never actually chose who would go. The vote on how they choose is just that, how. It says absolutely nothing about the who. And furthermore
The snakes aren't actually overlords. They're not even all that important in the hierarchy of the aliens plans. They're just kinda there because snek waifus. Do you even XCOM?
That's because I explicitly stated I don't care, and let the other players choose. And futhermore
Those are fighting words, mate! Nobody XCOMs harder than I do! I know my lore! If you remember, the alien species out to conquer the Earth are called SnakeMEN. The waifus are all here in the Astral world drinking awesome coffee with jewel thieves while the males are duking it out with XCOM rookies.
The insidious alien plan is to let the humanity think it won and then unleash the hordes of pretty snek women on the unsuspecting populace, subverting the fittest and achieving instant world domination.
But we are onto them. With the power of FABULOUS, Tosada will subvert all the snek waifus to the cause of humanity!
And it was stated explicitly that the only optional vote was how they decided, and you somehow confused the two.
And now you're pulling references from the originals? That's a dirty trick my friend. In any case it only ever implied that snakemen were chryssaild caretakers, not masters. The sneks themselves showed little intelligence, being controlled by with higher psionic capabilities.
To be fair though, the aliens have evolved a lot in the past twenty years URL I'm not even sure what's Canon anymore, or more confusingly, if it's all Canon
[X] Respect her privacy as a snake person, and don't trigger her. Probablybecause she most likely has poison spit.
[X] Marvelously Artful Robber In Aether, or Maria for short.
[X] Sendi(card)
[X] A raunchy game of Snek and Ladders. Winner has to go grab the thing.
Also, on that note, and because I really, really want to ruin my Co-QM's fun.
Here's an excerpt from a scene Akina as in somewhat recently. Slightly edited to protect the innocent of course. *Disclaimer, not Astral Sea relevant.
Akina: "If you think," Akina grounds her teeth a bit, really she should learn that honestly just looks cute with her wateriness, "that I can just accept a few pretty words, and completely forget that two of them legitimately make me fear for my life?" She looks down, her arms falling to her side balled in fists, shaking.
-
Narrative: Rin and Adeline stop their antics immediately, giving her wide eyed stares.
Lucy points towards herself and mouths 'me?' silently.
- Omitted named male main character: His eyes narrow, and his body tenses in almost imperceptible ways.
"Akina." he begins, enunciating clearly. "Are you also afraid of me?"
-
She looks up suddenly, startled and her eyes leaking quite a bit of clear liquid, though somehow it should be noted a water spirit leaking water really doesn't have as much impact as it, or maybe it does, fuck if I know. It's almost pretty though, really, the clear water with the sun's glare really contrasts with her see-through blue color. "Of course not!" She does not manage to hold in an undignified shout which is oddly and frantically high pitched. "I am afraid of the damn psychos!"
Once again Lucy points to herself which Akina instantly responds, flicking a pleasant smile to her, the tears don't stop though. "No not you Lucy! You are so perfect I am attracted to you, really, keep it up."
The girl beams, not really sure if that's a good thing. But it probably is, right?
She instantly jumps her attention back to Omitted named male character. "But if forgetting that they make me quiver, is what it takes, fine." She actually marches up to him, fists still balled, leaving the water entirely.
- Omitted named male main character: He shakes his head, raising a hand towards her slowly. He makes no attempt to actually touch her, however. "Has Adeline done anything, so far, to make you think she would ever hurt you?"
- Akina: "Within the first hour of meeting her she forced me into a bucket, a BUCKET!" She barely keeps it down to below a scream. As it is it probably hurt Omitted named male character's ears, it certainly did Adeline's if her wince from where she is looking guilty from on top of Rin is any indication. "She cared so little for my protests, she actually mocked me for it, and laughed!" Ya, Adeline looks, really, really fucking guilty.
"From there, while she had already proven I was at her mercy," she swings her balled left arm to her side and a splash of water emits, hitting the ground with, actually some force if the grass ripped from it is any indication, about two feet from Rin's face.
"When, when I'm at her mercy," her voice really breaks up here, an actual quake, "she flares enough desire to kill from less than a foot in front of me, desire to kill Omitted named male character, as in malice so powerful I actively saw my own death!" Once again, Adeline winces. "About a stupid joke about candy, while she had actively trapped me in a bucket and reduced my dignity to a pulp!" She throws her hands in the air, more water exploding out but this time it, doesn't come back down for a few seconds, and when it does, it slaps on-(nat 1)Omitted named male character dodges easily, not even breaking eye contact,-the ground, where he was standing, and she makes no notice even as all of the other girl's three girls flinch.
"If it had been me, it would have been fine, that, girl," she points directly to Adeline, another spray of water shoots out from her hand, pretty powerful actually, which is why it's relieving when a black tendril from Rin intercepts, moving wide into the air and spreading thin for just a moment until the water impacts and bounces off, landing in the grass, "had already insulted me a hundred times worse, but she showed off that she's an actual killer over an ignorant joke from a guard that had no idea what she was messing with."
"Then! As if she could not wait to show off, she took off from simple insults from Rin, so juvenile I actually cringed, and then she proceeded to brutally murder a tree! And, I know that doesn't mean as much to any of you as it does me, that's, I get that ok?" She sounds disheartened there. "Pretending is just stupid..."
"But that doesn't matter, what does matter is that she did it to relieve stress, she proved very quickly after meeting her that she gains satisfaction off causing suffering, whether that other can fight back or not."
"Even then, even when going through hard times after that." She chokes here for about, making strange, pathetic noises with her throat, her teary warbling is not helping. "She has the nerve to pretend she respects me, at-least Rin has the decency to mock me openly instead of acting like some perfect little princess when you're looking!"
"I, I...." She looks down again for a whole two seconds, her fists very much so shaking and there is an actual literal stream flowing from her eyes. She's, actually shrinks from the amount spewing out of her in this two second period by about, maybe 3 inches from her already tiny, 4'7 frame.
- Omitted named male character:He takes a soft step towards her, eyes full of concern, but says nothing
- Akina"I, have been used." Her eyes sting. "I have been beaten." Her teeth grit. "I have been torn from my family not once, not twice, but three times." She looks him right in the eyes. "I have been," she chokes again, for a good second as she makes more choking, warbely, pathetic throat noises.
Her voice sounds truly pathetic here, more wet sound than actual speech "I have been tricked, by my best friend, into outright enslavement, Omitted named male character. But never, not once, in my entire life!" So much rage. "Have I been treated so unfairly, and disrespected so thoroughly, by someone I didn't even know. And never, has someone enjoyed inflicting that pain so much."
At this point Adeline's shut down, the only response from her even as Rin whispers statements like "you didn't know" and "you didn't mean it", are the shell-shocked shivers, pathetic whines only someone so young could pull off, and almost acidic feeling tears flowing down her tiny face. She, actually sounds like a child for once.
Also, on that note, and because I really, really want to ruin my Co-QM's fun.
Here's an excerpt from a scene Akina as in somewhat recently. Slightly edited to protect the innocent of course. *Disclaimer, not Astral Sea relevant.
Akina: "If you think," Akina grounds her teeth a bit, really she should learn that honestly just looks cute with her wateriness, "that I can just accept a few pretty words, and completely forget that two of them legitimately make me fear for my life?" She looks down, her arms falling to her side balled in fists, shaking.
-
Narrative: Rin and Adeline stop their antics immediately, giving her wide eyed stares.
Lucy points towards herself and mouths 'me?' silently.
- Omitted named male main character: His eyes narrow, and his body tenses in almost imperceptible ways.
"Akina." he begins, enunciating clearly. "Are you also afraid of me?"
-
She looks up suddenly, startled and her eyes leaking quite a bit of clear liquid, though somehow it should be noted a water spirit leaking water really doesn't have as much impact as it, or maybe it does, fuck if I know. It's almost pretty though, really, the clear water with the sun's glare really contrasts with her see-through blue color. "Of course not!" She does not manage to hold in an undignified shout which is oddly and frantically high pitched. "I am afraid of the damn psychos!"
Once again Lucy points to herself which Akina instantly responds, flicking a pleasant smile to her, the tears don't stop though. "No not you Lucy! You are so perfect I am attracted to you, really, keep it up."
The girl beams, not really sure if that's a good thing. But it probably is, right?
She instantly jumps her attention back to Omitted named male character. "But if forgetting that they make me quiver, is what it takes, fine." She actually marches up to him, fists still balled, leaving the water entirely.
- Omitted named male main character: He shakes his head, raising a hand towards her slowly. He makes no attempt to actually touch her, however. "Has Adeline done anything, so far, to make you think she would ever hurt you?"
- Akina: "Within the first hour of meeting her she forced me into a bucket, a BUCKET!" She barely keeps it down to below a scream. As it is it probably hurt Omitted named male character's ears, it certainly did Adeline's if her wince from where she is looking guilty from on top of Rin is any indication. "She cared so little for my protests, she actually mocked me for it, and laughed!" Ya, Adeline looks, really, really fucking guilty.
"From there, while she had already proven I was at her mercy," she swings her balled left arm to her side and a splash of water emits, hitting the ground with, actually some force if the grass ripped from it is any indication, about two feet from Rin's face.
"When, when I'm at her mercy," her voice really breaks up here, an actual quake, "she flares enough desire to kill from less than a foot in front of me, desire to kill Omitted named male character, as in malice so powerful I actively saw my own death!" Once again, Adeline winces. "About a stupid joke about candy, while she had actively trapped me in a bucket and reduced my dignity to a pulp!" She throws her hands in the air, more water exploding out but this time it, doesn't come back down for a few seconds, and when it does, it slaps on-(nat 1)Omitted named male character dodges easily, not even breaking eye contact,-the ground, where he was standing, and she makes no notice even as all of the other girl's three girls flinch.
"If it had been me, it would have been fine, that, girl," she points directly to Adeline, another spray of water shoots out from her hand, pretty powerful actually, which is why it's relieving when a black tendril from Rin intercepts, moving wide into the air and spreading thin for just a moment until the water impacts and bounces off, landing in the grass, "had already insulted me a hundred times worse, but she showed off that she's an actual killer over an ignorant joke from a guard that had no idea what she was messing with."
"Then! As if she could not wait to show off, she took off from simple insults from Rin, so juvenile I actually cringed, and then she proceeded to brutally murder a tree! And, I know that doesn't mean as much to any of you as it does me, that's, I get that ok?" She sounds disheartened there. "Pretending is just stupid..."
"But that doesn't matter, what does matter is that she did it to relieve stress, she proved very quickly after meeting her that she gains satisfaction off causing suffering, whether that other can fight back or not."
"Even then, even when going through hard times after that." She chokes here for about, making strange, pathetic noises with her throat, her teary warbling is not helping. "She has the nerve to pretend she respects me, at-least Rin has the decency to mock me openly instead of acting like some perfect little princess when you're looking!"
"I, I...." She looks down again for a whole two seconds, her fists very much so shaking and there is an actual literal stream flowing from her eyes. She's, actually shrinks from the amount spewing out of her in this two second period by about, maybe 3 inches from her already tiny, 4'7 frame.
- Omitted named male character:He takes a soft step towards her, eyes full of concern, but says nothing
- Akina"I, have been used." Her eyes sting. "I have been beaten." Her teeth grit. "I have been torn from my family not once, not twice, but three times." She looks him right in the eyes. "I have been," she chokes again, for a good second as she makes more choking, warbely, pathetic throat noises.
Her voice sounds truly pathetic here, more wet sound than actual speech "I have been tricked, by my best friend, into outright enslavement, Omitted named male character. But never, not once, in my entire life!" So much rage. "Have I been treated so unfairly, and disrespected so thoroughly, by someone I didn't even know. And never, has someone enjoyed inflicting that pain so much."
At this point Adeline's shut down, the only response from her even as Rin whispers statements like "you didn't know" and "you didn't mean it", are the shell-shocked shivers, pathetic whines only someone so young could pull off, and almost acidic feeling tears flowing down her tiny face. She, actually sounds like a child for once.