Greetings, malcontents, mini-mes, and the many maladjusted minions! It is I, the Master of Games!
This place to which I have displaced you, this perilous platform, sits surrounded by the shadow realm, a place of dreams and little else. You cannot leave it! You cannot flee from or fight it! You can only play the game, and what a game it is!
You stand before me wearing your false selves, the faces you were born with but cast aside in favor of the iconography of illegals or the signature style of a savior, in a phrase -your secret identities. No one here knows the true name of any other nor anyone else's secret power, save I.
But enough of that blather! Sidekicks! I have stolen you from your homes, your schools, your places of part-time work, and from all manner of ages from brightest gold to darkest rust, because you have all made a wish that I shall generously grant you. Every one of you wished to be relevant, to have meaning beyond make-work and terrifying trembling two-bit thugs!
But that cannot come without two prices that must be paid, my dears. First is the price of sacrifice. The time of your childhood is over. You will either leave this place as heroes and villains in your own right, or die...
...Of embarrassment.
Uhumph.
The second price is entertainment, and I can already tell that we're going to have a grand old time, so let's get to it, shall we?
Let me just hand out these cards that will tell you what your role, ability, and victory condition are, and then we can get started.