The Steep Path Ahead [Familiar of Zero AU]

Did Luise figure out true Explosion when she killed the griffin, with the non-lethal option?

Also holy shit Saito, have you never heard of STDs?

He probably hasn't, or assumes they're a lot rarer than they are. Japan has a real problem with that.

Pretty sure STDs are very rare in Japan. I think.

Actually they're extremely common but very poorly known due to really bad sex ed, the strong lack taboo on talking about anything shameful/abnormal plus weird cultural hangups regarding contraceptives (It's seen as emasculating for men and women using/carrying them is seen as "slutty", so condoms are used a lot less than they should, particularly among the young where there's an expectation of "purity" on the women and the men are more insecure). I read somewhere about 80% of sexually active people in Japan have STDs. I think AIDS is rare at least, which might be what you're thinking of, but STDs in general are way more common than in the West.

TLDR, fucked up shitty sex education like the South, plus shame culture leads to the clap and herpes among other things being everywhere. Less teen pregnancy though cause no one gives a shit about abortions.
 
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Actually they're extremely common but very poorly known due to really bad sex ed and the lack of people talking about things plus weird cultural hangups regarding contraceptives (It's seen as emasculating for men and women using/carrying them is seen as "slutty", so condoms are used a lot less than they should, particularly among the young where there's an expectation of "purity" on the women and the men are more insecure). I read somewhere about 80% of sexually active people in Japan have STDs. I think AIDs is rare at least, which might be what you're thinking of, but STDs in general are way more common than in the West.

TLDR, fucked up shitty sex education like the South leads to the clap and herpes among other things being everywhere. Less teen pregnancy though cause no one gives a shit about abortions.
Really? Huh, did not know that. Not so surprising now that I think about it, though. But yeah, I was probably thinking of the people with AIDS, which is pretty rare in Japan.

Edit: Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs) or Infections (STIs) in Japan
Holy moly, you weren't exaggerating the 82% infection rate! I know what I'll not be doing if I go to japan
 
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Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Seventeen

Saito was not happy. Sure, he had a jingling purse filled with Ecus and he felt like life was starting to look up to him, but he wasn't happy. With Luise on his back, finding a room to sleep the night had taken a couple of hours, especially because the majority of inns were filled to the brim with refugees who had managed to convince the owners to let them crash by the dozen in single rooms in exchange for a slightly higher price.

Except for brothels, most inns were filled. Yet, somehow, even with Luise knocked out cold, anytime his feet began to move towards a brothel or a place of perdition Luise's hands would move while the girl slept to pinch his cheeks and steer him away from such places.

The first time, he had thought she was just faking being asleep and tired, but apparently her prudishness was a key part of her being, so much so that even when knocked out cold, she would still find ways to keep herself -and those near her- 'pure'.

They had found an inn in the end. It hadn't been as cheap as the others -which was probably the reason the refugees hadn't piled inside of it either- but he did have the money, and since he paid upfront the owner had nothing more to say but 'to have a pleasant night and keep the noise low for the other patrons'.

Somehow, Saito was starting to believe that the people around him had quite the skewed off vision of what 'beauty' meant. Just because he was carrying Luise on his back didn't mean they were a couple, nor that he found her attractive.

Sure, she was a foreigner and foreigners were always 'hawt' as was the term his classmates said. And yes, she was admittedly 'cute' when she didn't act like a nun straight out of hell or a knight Templar of purity. At the same time though...she couldn't be his age. She was too small for one thing, and had zero curves.

No, Saito's type needed to have curves. She needed to have a lot of curves, in all of the right places, and-

Luise somehow sensed his lust, because she proceeded to pull his hair and gnaw on his head even as she slept, making him hiss in pain as he forcefully had to pry her off and drop her on the bed.

"Damn," Saito mumbled. "My hair," he patted his head, "the rats didn't manage to bite me, and it had to be you of all people," he grumbled as a sudden thought struck him. He placed Luise beneath the sheets, tucking her in, and then dropped down next to her, but above a layer. He then turned to the side and snuffed out the candle on the bed desk.

Was he going to be hit the next morning? Definitely.

Was he going to laugh like a lunatic at the prank?

That was what made it all worthwhile.

The next morning, Saito woke up to a strange feeling. It was kind of like being gazed at by a venomous snake ready to pounce and drive its fangs in his neck, and the thought made him quite uncomfortable.

He opened a single eye to peek at the source of such venom, and then froze like a rat having heard the rattling of the rattlesnake. Luise's hair was lifted near the edges, her expression one of pure, murderous fury.

"T-They had only one room available!" Saito yelped in fear, outright falling down from the bed and bringing both hands to cover his face.

Luise narrowed her eyes in fury. "You-" Luise growled. "You moron!" she yelled, jumping out of the bed. "You could have removed my shoes at least!"

Saito whimpered for a brief instant, and then blinked. "Uh?"

"My shoes!" Luise muttered, "Do you have any idea how uncomfortable it is to sleep with your shoes on?! Argh," she hastily removed them, letting them drop on the floor together with her socks. "Much better," she exhaled in relief, stretching a bit.

"You're...not mad about the bed?"

"Why?" Luise inclined her head to the side, an eyebrow raised. "We slept in groups of three to four in the orphanage," she mumbled. "And I sleep better with someone near me anyway," she stretched her arms, letting her legs dangle a bit. "You even separated us with sheets, and we were both dressed-what did you think I'd do, scream about my infringed purity? Seriously Saito," she shook her head, "You'll need to do better than that. I grew up with a lot of brothers and sisters-from frogs on the pillow to underwear used as flags, nothing as trifling as this could ever work on me!"

Saito took a small breath of relief, and sighed. "Well," Saito said. "Glad to know that."

"Of course," Luise said, "Now that I know that I can cast a spell," she had a bright and malicious smile on her face, "And a Sleep spell at that-maybe you should pick your battles more carefully. I could always draw on your face with coal while you're asleep and then wake you up near a dragon or something."

Saito gave her a flat gaze. "Really?"

"Well, I can always draw mustaches on you!" Luise said hotly. "I'm sure if you stay still for a few minutes I can finish the chant."

"Because I would stay still for a few minutes," Saito replied, both arms crossed in front of his chest.

Luise pouted, and fell with her back on the bed. "Anyway! How much did we get from the rat killing? I want to get myself a mask."

"Well, we earned quite a-wait, why a mask?" Saito asked, perplexed.

"Because if we end up stepping in a brothel again, I don't want anyone to recognize my face!" Luise yelled hotly. "And two young male adventurers will be treated more seriously than a boy and a girl. They'd keep thinking we're a couple or worst, and I have no intention of letting such rumors spread!"

Saito's lips twitched in a sort of smile, "And-and they'd let you wear a mask just like that?"

"Adventurers are allowed to be eccentric," Luise said. "And I can say that my face was melted off by this or that strange creature. Nobody's going to bother me about it if I don't make it an issue."

Saito sighed. "Well, where are we going to buy a mask?"

"A blacksmith," Luise said with a nod. "A metal mask sounds great."

"Right-o Lord Darth Vader," Saito said cheekily. "Want a lightsaber with that?"

"Why would anyone want a saber made of light? Wouldn't it cut nothing?" Luise asked, inclining her head to the side with a questioning gaze.

"Never mind," Saito said. "Can we have breakfast first?"

Luise hummed an agreeable tune, and put her shoes back on. "Next time you drag me to bed," Luise said, "Remove my shoes."

"Aye, aye my lady," Saito drawled. "Only if you'll do the same."

"But I did," Luise said. "That time-well, never mind," Luise shook her head. "Let's just go. I'm so hungry I could eat a dragon."

Saito's stomach grumbled in agreement, and thus the duo descended for a hearty breakfast.

It was good to have a warm meal after a tiresome day of hard work.

Really, Saito was starting to have an all new level of appreciation for his father, salary-man as he was, collar-worker that he was...he still worked hard. Maybe he didn't go around killing rats, but what he did, he did for family.

Paying for food out of one's earned money, there really was no greater way of maturing as a person than that.
 
Saito's having character development. But what's this about his classmates regarding foreigners as 'hot'? Aren't they generally rather xenophobic towards us non-Japanese?
 
Saito's having character development. But what's this about his classmates regarding foreigners as 'hot'? Aren't they generally rather xenophobic towards us non-Japanese?
Think of it this way.
There are plenty of Aussies who hate Asians, but still think the Asian girl in that kung-fu film is hot.
Japan doesn't hate foreigners, they just prefer them to stay foreign. They love American culture, just dislike having actual Americans around.

Note this is a sweeping generalization, and this can be seen in pretty much every culture.
 
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Saito's having character development. But what's this about his classmates regarding foreigners as 'hot'? Aren't they generally rather xenophobic towards us non-Japanese?

The 'Hawt' foreigner trope is something pretty common in most Japanese mangas actually. We aren't talking about a working-age foreigner, but about a 'cute foreigner girl' type typical of VN or Harem mangas.

As always, 'two weights and two measures' apply.
 
Japan doesn't hate foreigners, they just prefer them to stay foreign. They love American culture, just dislike having actual Americans around.

Note this is a sweeping generalization, and this can be seen in pretty much every culture.

This is true but Japan's bipolar nature is a little extream on this topic. They are terribly friendly and love tourists but every conversation eventually includes, "when are you going home?"
 
This is true but Japan's bipolar nature is a little extream on this topic. They are terribly friendly and love tourists but every conversation eventually includes, "when are you going home?"

It's the old Sideshow/Exotic form of racism. Not common enough to be threatening and seen as exotic and interesting. And fetishistic. But that wears out fast and you sure as hell don't want one moving next door or marrying inyo the family. "What would your parents/the neighbours think?"

It's pretty common when the minority isnt common enough to be seen as threatening to the majoriyy. Australia used to be the same for people of African descent.
 
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It's the old Sideshow/Exotic form of racism. Not common enough to be threatening and seen as exotic and interesting. And fetishistic. But that wears out fast and you sure as hell don't want one moving next door or marrying inyo the family. "What would your parents/the neighbours think?"

It's pretty common when the minority isnt common enough to be seen as threatening to the majoriyy. Australia used to be the same for people of African descent.
The irony is that amongst the Asian American population the Japanese are the most common group to marry non-Japanese. Hell amongst my relatives and the local Japanese American population I am one of the few full Japanese Americans.
 
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Eighteen

The Blacksmith didn't as much as say a peep as Luise asked, and received, an iron mask to cover the lower part of her face. "Isn't there a full-face one?" Luise asked. "And-are they this common around here?"

The Blacksmith shrugged. "There's a famous tale of an iron-masked adventurer, so lots of young upstarts who want to play adventurer get one. Then they die, and someone fishes their masks out of this or that creature and brings them to their grieving families. Want to write your name on the inside of the mask? As a good luck charm-"

"No," Luise said hotly. "We already took care of a gryphon," she puffed her chest up in pride. "We don't need any good luck charm, the faith in the Founder will guide us through."

The unspoken 'and we are not spending money on frivolous stuff' remained in the air, mostly because even Luise knew how hypocrite it would sound if she were to say it after buying an iron mask simply to hide her gender to potential customers.

"How do I look?" Luise asked after putting the mask, turning towards Saito. The boy nervously chuckled, and scratched the side of his chin.

"Kind of scary?" Saito hazarded, trying to be polite. 'Like a cheap cosplayer' would probably fly over her head, but that seemed to be the correct word to placate Luise, because the girl visibly preened up and nodded to herself, buying the mask and stepping outside with it on her face. A few steps later, and she moved it over her head, breathing raggedly.

"Problems already?" Saito asked.

"N-Well," Luise grumbled, "It's hard to breathe with, but I'll get used to it in no time, you just wait and see!" as if to cement her point, she dropped it once more over her face.

"So," Saito said. "What's the plan?"

"The plan is simple," Luise said. "We're going to the closest church and we're asking if they saw the head priest of my church. Father Christoff must have passed by here. It's the closest city near the border, and with the children, he must have left them in the care of a fellow faithful."

Her voice didn't sound so sure, but Saito didn't pry. They asked a nearby merchant where the church was, and after a small groan left Saito's lips, they departed for the nearest hill. The city wasn't as big as Tokyo, of course, but it also didn't have any means of transport other than by feet. Unless they took a carriage, but something told him Luise would have scoffed at the idea of wasting money when they could just walk there...to the other side of the city.

Near the walls, past a long line of massed farmers that had fled the countryside, a neat church with pristine white walls and an untouched garden stood. The beggars were all outside the gates, where a group of guards were holding back a dozen of men from entering. "We just want to pray the Gods!" one yelled. From the gardens, a small group of priests were currently tending to the herbs growing within, sniping away at the hedgerows and pruning the plants.

"The church is closed for the day," one of the guards said gruffly. "Come back later."

"What about the food? Will they give us something?" another man asked.

"If you come back when the sun is about to set then yes, the priests will offer a warm plate to those who are the most in need," the guard said, looking visibly contrived from having probably repeated that very same line at least a good dozen of times. "Now scram."

"Hey!" Luise asked, drawing near with Saito. "Do you know if a Germanian priest came by this way?"

"A Germanian priest?" the guard actually blinked for a second at the definitely bizarre question. "Are you bounty hunters?" he asked next, his eyes narrowed. "There are no Germanian priests in the church, and even if there were, they are under the protection of the Gods!"

"What? No! He should have come with a group from an orphanage! We've been looking everywhere for them-"

One of the guards looked at another, and then beckoned an acolyte from the garden closer, whispering a few words and pointing in their direction. The acolyte frowned, and then muttered something back before drawing nearer, while the guard instead walked inside the church.

"Might I ask why two adventurers are looking for them?" the acolyte asked, his arms crossed in front of his chest, a pensive look on his face.

"What?! There are Germanians inside the church!?" one of the farmers yelled, attracting the attention of a few others. "We faithful Tristanians aren't allowed inside, but Germanian pigs gets to enter!?"

"All are equal in the eyes of g-" the acolyte said, taking a step back as the uproar from the crowd startled him.

"We've got children too!" a few dirty-dressed women yelled. "Why can't they get inside?!"

The crowd began to push, a sudden blow sending Luise against Saito, and making the girl yelp. "Hey!" Saito snapped, only to swallow nervously at the murderous glares of the tired masses.

"Let them in! Let us in!" the crowd chanted as the guards started to push back in an effort to clear the gates. It didn't take a genius to understand that the situation was turning sour, and pretty fast at that too. Saito grabbed Luise by her midriff, and pushed his back against the metallic bars that separated the street from the garden.

The guards would solve the problem easily, hopefully without bloodshed-Luise put the wand away right this instant.

"Luise! Don't!" Saito exclaimed, only too late to stop the spell from departing abruptly from the girl's wand, shining brightly like a tiny sphere of light before it detonated, crackling the cobblestone and lifting a plume of smoke and a cloud of dust.

"Enough!" Luise snapped. "I will not have you start a fight in the middle of the street and in front of a church to boot! Have some respect for god and fear for his punishment, or learn to fear me when I'll be done with you!" she snarled, clearly agitated as she broke free from Saito's grip, lifting her wand a bit higher for everyone nearby to see it, and thus cower from it. "Now scram before I decide I want to see raining peasants' bits!" as she shrilly yelled the last part, more than a few children began to wail as the mothers carried them away, soon followed by a couple of peasants who had better things to do than risk their necks and limbs against a fallen noble of all things.

Saito watched the crowd disperse, and one of the guards sigh in relief. "Thanks for the assistance, ma'am," the guard said, tipping his helmet in her direction.

Luise frowned, "You recognized I was a girl beneath the mask?" she asked.

"Not at first, but when your husband called your name-"

"He's not my husband!" "She's not my wife!" both young adventurers shot out at the same time, receiving a moment of silence from the guards at the gate, before they soon devolved into laughter.

From within the church, a portly man walked outside taking wobbly steps, the weight of his fat making him appear like a mountain of jelly, golden rings adorning most of his hands. "Do my eyes deceive m-" then he clutched his chest as Luise turned to give the full view of her iron mask to the priest, who paled considerably. "G-Gah!" the man slipped, and fell down with a thunderous noise.

"Father Christoff!" Luise said, rushing for the gates which the guards hastily opened up to step in and help the man. Saito hurried behind Luise, and as Luise removed her mask and knelt near the fat head priest, she sighed in relief. "Father Christoff-you are as clumsy as ever!"

"My dear Luise-you, on the other hand, keep giving me heart attacks," Father Christoff replied with a broad smile. Close up, Saito could notice that except for his weight, the fat priest had little else of notice. The golden chain around his neck with the symbol of his faith, a shaved beard with just a hint of red, and dark crimson hair that had turned for the most part grey with age. "I no longer have the strength of a spry sapling!" the man laughed, even as Saito -and two more guards- hissed from the effort required to pull him up.

Luise had tears in her eyes as she rushed to hug the fat man, who in turn patted the girl's head as another bout of laughter left his throat. "My if you've grown!" he exclaimed, "But you look pale-you need something to eat!" with a nod, he began to gesture towards the church's entrance. "Let's get inside now, you have to tell me everything that happened!"

"Yeah," Luise answered with an eager nod, "I'd like that."

Saito smiled at the scene, glad that Luise had actually found the priest she was looking for.

Now, if only he hadn't been utterly ignored as the two of them entered the church - Luise, was it too much to do presentations!?
 
Near the walls, past a long line of massed farmers that had fled the countryside, a neat church with pristine white walls and an untouched garden stood. The beggars were all outside the gates, where a group of guards were holding back a dozen of men from entering. "We just want to pray the Gods!" one yelled.
holding back a dozen men from entering. "We just want to pray to the Gods!" one yelled.

Wonder if the priest reacted with such shock to Luise's appearance due to...well, her appearance?
 
"What about the food? Will they give us something?" another man asked.

"If you come back when the sun is about to set then yes, the priests will offer a warm plate to those who are the most in need," the guard said, looking visibly contrived from having probably repeated that very same line at least a good dozen of times. "Now scram."
Not sure what word you're going for, but it's not "contrived".

Now, if only he hadn't been utterly ignored as the two of them entered the church - Luise, was it too much to do presentations!?
Introductions.
 
"Presentation" can work in that context. It has a semi-archaic meaning related to social introductions (though that is admittedly more related to court functions).
 
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Nineteen

Saito looked at the set table, and his stomach grumbled slightly. He was waiting for the prayer to finish, but he was already regretting not having taken up 'Father Christoff' offer of being the one thanking the gods for the food. Luise kept on babbling excitedly, and didn't seem to know when to stop -at least, not until she cited the entirety of their holy 'Founder Book'.

"That is enough of a blessing for today's meager supper," Father Christoff said, his smile stretched out thin as he kindly admonished Luise, who quieted down in turn as she brought her hands to the fork and the knife.

Saito, inwardly, thanked the spirits, the gods, and whoever else had interceded to allow him to finally eat.

Nothing but the clinking of cutlery on plates or food was heard for the following minutes, and only once he had easily wolfed down more than enough soup and meat to feel at peace with himself did Saito take a deep breath and check his surroundings once more.

"You must have been famished," Father Christoff said with a loud chuckle. "Eat up my good man! You brought our little Luise back home in one piece, and a meager supper is more than honestly earned."

"Father," Luise said nervously. "Where are the other orphans?"

"Oh," Father Christoff nodded. "They couldn't be kept all together. This church has its fair share of orphans to feed too. So I had them sent to different orphanages. I am sure they are well, for the Founder kindly looks over them too."

Luise nodded with a tiny smudge of hesitation, which was soon forgotten as Father Christoff turned towards Saito once more. "I admit, you did a good job. I always said during my sermons that great adventurers would help those in need without asking for a reward-"

"Father Christoff, Saito's not an adventurer!" Luise exclaimed, shamefully looking down at her plate the next second, the food barely touched in it.

Saito simply laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head and looking sideways. Luise had started the argument, so it was up to Luise to finish it.

"He-" Luise stammered, "He's-He's my familiar," she said. "I summoned him-"

"Oh," Father Christoff said. He frowned, "Is he perchance a rare monster that can alter its appearance? Luise-you did not summon a Vampire, did you!?" the priest made a quick 'holy' sign, and stared wide eyed at Saito.

"No!" Luise shook her head vehemently. "He's human! I-I kind of summoned him in the wilds of Germania-"

"You did...what." Father Christoff' head moved sharply from Luise to Saito and vice-versa, before bringing both hands to his face and exhaling deeply into them. "Luise."

"T-They kicked me out from the academy before I could do my summoning!" Luise exclaimed, "I was alone in the wilderness and there were wolves all around! I-I was scared, I-I thought I could get a dragon or something!"

"Luise, Luise, Luise," Father Christoff shook his head repeatedly, "Could you show me your familiar runes, young man?" he asked next. "I apologize if it might feel I am not trusting you, but such a wild tale as the summoning of a human being-"

Saito lifted his hand carved with the runes, and as Father Christoff squinted his eyes looking at them, he shook his head shortly after. "Well, they seem real enough." He shrugged. "So, what are you planning to do now, Luise? I would love nothing more than keep you here, but unfortunately I feel it wouldn't be safe for you. It isn't safe for me either, but..." he sighed. "Better than being in Germania with that vile heathen of an Emperor."

Luise bit her lips, before gathering her courage. "I-I promised I would help Saito back home before returning to take my vows and become a nun-"

"I see," Father Christoff said, humming thoughtfully. "May I presume it's Rub Al Khali your destination?" he asked. "It's a long and dangerous road, Luise."

"I made a promise," Luise said firmly, "I'm not going back on my word."

Father Christoff nodded, before chuckling softly. "I think I can write you a letter of safe conduct into Tristain. Cardinal Mazarin owes me a few favors," he winked. "He'll get you settled nicely for your trip, dangerous as it may be." He sighed. "And I will, of course, pray for your souls and hope that the Gods show mercy upon your travels. The doors of Brimir's faithful will always be open for you, Luise, and for you too, Mister Saito."

Luise blushed lightly from embarrassment, as Saito simply fidgeted, not knowing what to say. Father Christoff laughed loudly afterwards, lifting his glass of wine, "But now let us drink and be merry! We must render grace for your safe travels until now!"

Father Christoff could eat, and drink, quite a lot. When supper was over, he wobbled his way to grab a quick rest, leaving a slightly tipsy Luise and Saito to stumble their way onto the nearest bench of the church's main hall, where they both simply collapsed against one another, their faces flushed from the heat of the wine.

When Father Christoff offered you wine, it was the type of offer you couldn't refuse.

"Hey~" Luise said tipsily, giggling lightly. "Seeeee? T-The head priest's a niicee gguuuyy," she slurred out.

"Yeah," Saito replied with a grin of his own, relaxing against the wooden bench. His eyes closed for a brief moment, and as the fatigue of the day washed over him, mixed with the effect of the wine, he felt at peace, as if nothing could possibly go wrong.

"H-He even said-the mask was cool in the end!" Luise chirped out, clutching on to the mask with both of her hands and putting it on, "S-Saito~ It's c-cool, right?" she giggled. "It's-it's made of metal, so-" she began to laugh brightly.

"Y-You're drunk," Saito slurred out with a snort.

"A-Am not!" Luise replied with a pout.

"Am...too."

"Not," she grumbled, snuggling the side of her face against Saito's shoulder, "Not...drunk."

"Uh-uh," Saito muttered, letting his head rest to the side, atop Luise's own.

That was how Father Christoff found them half an hour later, both peacefully snoring away. He returned ten minutes later with a thick wool sheet and covered them both with it, before tiptoeing silently outside.

Cardinal Mazarin would deal with all the problems there might be and, maybe, it would be enough of a favor to get him a post in the capital, with better food and wine.

He'd put a good word in for the boy too.

Or maybe once the Valliere heir returned to its rightful post, she might take care of him. Everyone in a foreign lands wishes to return home until they receive warm food and good wine, together with soft mattresses and a large house.

But it would take the Cardinal's word for it to work. He doubted the Duchess would as much as read a letter sent by a lowly priest as him, or believe in his words.

The hair could be a trick, so...the Cardinal was needed.

He was the one who had made him keep it all a secret, after all.
 
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