To tide you lot over until the next hate, doki doki.
Omake:
A Spider and the really $@"&ing Angry Wasp
Shade was not happy.
Come to think of it, he almost never was.
He has seen almost everything, from Hogwarts, to the Hogwarts rip-off, Tristan's Magic School.
He has spoken to a most colourful cast of people, from half-dragons, to Sith Lords, to reincarnated codexes of evil.
He has gone where no man has gone before.
He has seen sights that no-one else will see.
But this...
It was absolutely fucking idiotic.
He sat, strapped to a chair, with an array of the world's mightiest heroes standing before him on a round table.
"So let me get this straight." The lack of coffee was getting to him, he had to finish this quick, "I managed to take down a world class terrorist group."
"A city class terrorist group."
"A terrorist group, which has been endangering civilians and causing untold amounts of property damage, I managed to defeat them and confirm their deaths."
"Correct."
"A terrorist group that somehow managed to escape containment an untold number of times."
"I suppose."
"I don't get it."
"I don't get it either, actually," commented Iron Man from the side. "The guy used lethal self-defence which was justified in every sense of the word." He shrugged. "They were trying to kill him, and he responded in kind. Not like he really broke any laws, hell, he didn't really start it either, those guys were trying to rob a bank."
"THE PROBLEM," Spider-Man yelled, "IS THAT THERE ARE SIX DEAD PEOPLE WHO WERE MURDERED BY HIM!" He jabbed a finger at Shade accusingly.
Shade raised an eyebrow. "They were trying to murder me."
"THAT'S NOT THE POINT." Yelled Spider-Man, waving his arms. "HE KILLED THEM WITHOUT MERCY, WHEN HE OBVIOUSLY COULD HAVE AVOIDED IT."
Shade blinked, and then sighed, "Look, I killed a bunch of murderers that were trying to kill me. I don't see the issue."
"Yeah, in full honesty, I don't see why we needed all the Avengers and X-men in on this." Stated Captain America, "Use of lethal force to defeat super villains is not unheard of. We can give him a slap on the wrist for using lethal, but that's about it. In full honesty he is kinda right, why is he still here?"
Spider-Man sputtered, his face colouring under his mask. "He... he used powerful magical artifacts! Civilians aren't supposed to have those!"
"Actually," Shade said, "My sword is a creation of my own, using a combination of magic and science to be made." He raised a finger, although his arm was still strapped to the armrests.
A little white lie, not too big of one, he did provide the materials after all.
"I'm also not really a citizen." He shrugged, or tried to anyway. "I come from a alternate dimension, and hail from a race not unlike the watcher, Uatu"
Truth with omission.
"Then you don't have a permit for it right?!" Spider-Man leaned in, his nose nearly touching Shade's.
"But he isn't a citizen of earth." Iron Man spoke up again. "That means he isn't subject-able to our law unless he does either a major crime or a repeat offence. He did neither."
Spider-Man spun towards Iron Man so quickly his neck almost seemed like it would snap. "When the hell did you become a lawyer?!"
Iron Man shrugged, "Last night."
Spider-Man snarled, "That's..."
Bruce Banner spoke up from the side, with the rest of the avengers. "Why are you so angry, Spider-Man? This isn't like you."
Spider-Man shrieked, pointing at Shade, "HE IGNORED THE UNWRITTEN LAW OF NOT KILLING." He waved his arms, "HE'S JUST AS BAD AS THE VILLAINS!"
Shade's temper snapped. "What the hell? Since when did I become a hero?" He glared at Spider-Man balefully. "It sounds like you're just pissed that I did your job better than you ever did."
Spider-Man spun around, "WHAT?!"
Shade pressed on, "Oh, you heard me. You are such a god-damn wuss that you can't muster up the guts to do what I did."
Spider-Man slammed his hand on the table, "It's not about courage! In fact, courage is the ability to grant mercy! Without it, you are no better than-"
"Bullshit." Hissed Shade. "Absolute bullshit." He ripped his way out of his restraints as unholy fire flickered around him.
"The only reason that you wouldn't execute these murderers is because you didn't have the guts."
Shade jabbed his finger at Spider-Man, who stepped back. "If you spare them the first time? Fine. Spare them the second? Understandable. Spare them thrice? Lock him the fuck down and tighten up the damn security. But how many fucking times have they broken out of their prison to harm innocents?" He snarled. "How fucking many people died because a supervillian broke out of prison and there wasn't a hero there to contain him in time? How fucking many times does a villain have to break out of maximum security before you realise that your prison is made out of cardboard?"
Spider-Man blinked, "It's only because other villains keep breaking them out again-"
"That's the fucking point! If you can't stop a villain from breaking out, then you send their soul to hell where they can't hurt anyone. After all," Shade raised an eyebrow, "Who should live, the villain or the untold number of innocents?"
Spider-Man stepped forwards, "We can stop them before-"
"But what if you can't? How are you going to explain to the orphan" Shade noticed that Spider-man shuddered at the word, good. "That the only reason that his parents are dead is because you didn't man the fuck up?"
Spider-Man stuttered, "Well-" he slipped backwards and fell down.
Shade's eyes narrowed, time to go for the kill.
He leaned in and looked at him dead in the eye, "Or are you letting them live so that you can catch them again, and get another pay-check?"
Spider-Man froze upon hearing those words.
One could almost hear the temperature drop in the dead silence.
Shade got back up.
"You disgust me."
Spider-Man seemed almost comatose, lying on the ground, shocked.
"Good, fucking, bye you glorified mercenary."
He turned around.
"Oh-great-and-mighty-Yui-give-me-strength."
He blinked, looking up.
The Warrior looked down upon the insignificant insect in front of it.
Shade reached for his sword.
And felt nothing.
He had forgotten it.
Back at Xaliver's School.
Goddamnit.
And with a flash, the sword reappeared, with Jubilee attached to it.
"Okay okay, I'll put it back-"
She froze, looking up at the maw of the Warrior.
Shade sighed.
And the Warrior vanished with a explosion of dark flame.
"For fucks sake." Shade muttered.
He jabbed a finger at the frozen Jubilee.
"Sword, hand it over, now."
She gave it wordlessly.
Shade took it by the handle and turned around.
To see six vault hunters stare at him.
Scratch that, seven vault hunters and an asshole.
He looked at the commando, Axton, "I take payment in coffee."
-End-
Got another after this involving some Jojo.
Don't expect it soon though.
Smashwords.
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