Remove ads

System Administrator (Worm) (AltPower!Taylor)

Reader mode
TemporaryMeasure said:
This is Bureaucracy & Character Growth Taylor #29.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

How do you solve Cauldron, Contessa and villainous thinkers including Simurgh? Because Taylor is way too weak to actually do anything... Because qother thinkers like Alexandria, Contessa, Coil, Dinah, Tattletsle and others can eat her for breakfast. She doesn't have experience in dealing with people and not enough time to learn it... so she is going to be doormat. Taylor's powerset won't work when the mud hits the fan...

So I am guessing there will be second trigger with some trump abilities...

Or will this be another unfinished "down to earth" Taylor fanfic? I think you had an idea but didn't think it through in the end...

Ps... What a joke about spycraft... In the age of super Sherlock's, precogs and master/stranger protocols she wouldn't be able to spy about anyone... Especially if she told about it to the Glory Hound who fkin broke Endbringer Truce and Unwritten rules on several occasions in canon. And before you talk about the moles and Coil: moles were of no consequence to Cauldron and PRT/Protectorate top brass... And Coil was allowed to spy due to the feudal parahuman experiment while being held in check by Contessa, also was using his savescumming power for infinite tries with another high-level thinker to get access to systems with his own already significant system level access...
 
Last edited:
Sometimes the point of stories is not to solve all the problems. If the author has to they can just handwave stuff. One story actually just had Scion disappear since the grimderp wasn't the point, they can do something like that.

Or, since Taylor is Admin!Yes to everything electronic then imagine meeting Dragon. I think there was a WoG post about an unchained Dragon being a big deal if she built up enough?

Edit: Thinking about it, since she can just grok systems, and organizations seem part of that, how much good could she do if she was able to streamline things?

Not likely, PRT paranoia and all, but an interesting thought. A lot of the problems in the end of Worm seemed to come down to Scion's sheer durability and that those fighting him would not cooperate and work together.
 
Last edited:
Actually, has anyone ever run with the idea that Scion is really what he pretends to be?

A fic where he's "just" a mentally challenged version of Superman, instead of depressed Lovecraftian apocalypse?
 
I don't think I've ever found or heard of one. Would be an interesting way to sidestep the plot though. Make the Endbringers the big bads, Scion a regular trigger, and then handwave away Cauldron.
 
uaeoaeoeoi said:
Honestly rather than outright joining the Wards it would probably be safer and more effective to have her be an anonymous private contractor type role, especially given that her powers heavily favor keeping her identity hidden from even most of the PRT/Protectorate to limit possible corrupt actors from tracking her down. Alternatively, if joining a government sponsored hero group, it would probably be best if she gets placed under the Guild to allow direct protection and security from Dragon given how important an asset she would be.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
The guild is just a Canadian superhero team at this point in time. It only became the S-class threat hunter people remember later on. Like during the timeskip later on.
DakieSalamander said:
Especially if she told about it to the Glory Hound who fkin broke Endbringer Truce and Unwritten rules on several occasions in canon.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
Worth mentioning that when he did that it was during a time when his life was falling apart. Something that likely won't happen here given most the inciting triggers for it have already been butterflied by no Skitter.
 
Last edited:
This is a good start, but there are some systemic problems with the writing - at least in my opinion. Everything seems to feel very rushed and there are very few descriptions of the surroundings and events. Things happen far too quickly, and I see very few emotional consequences for anything. There needs to be a lot more showing of how various emotions affect characters (what they look like, how they sound, their body language, how they react, etc.) and very little telling. Taylor seems to emotionally deal with the worst day of her life in minutes, come up with a plan in a few hours, and everything progresses at a breakneck pace. You need to slow things down significantly - if Taylor can just handle her trigger event in a few minutes to a couple of hours then why is it that big of a deal?

There should also be more descriptions of the surroundings - what rooms look like, what people are wearing, what they look like, how they sound when they talk, etc.

You should also think about using something like Grammarly or some other tool to make sure the punctuation and grammar are correct.

TemporaryMeasure said:
I guess I shouldn't have stayed up late on PHO last night, or I was dreading going back to the Trio, even in my sleep, or maybe that's why I stayed up so late.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Taylor should be far more aware of why she didn't get enough sleep or what happened - unless she is reconstructing the situation months or years later, after forgetting about it.

TemporaryMeasure said:
As I walked to my locker, I slowly realized the scent of something wrong wasn't just in my head- something was wrong.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

There are a couple of cases where you reuse phrases or terms in the same sentence or paragraph. E.g. here you are saying that something was wrong twice.

TemporaryMeasure said:
The next thing I remember is the ceiling of the hospital and the vacant, annoyed eyes of a girl in robes. "What's wrong?" My voice sounded like gravel. I turned my head - stiff neck - and saw a glass of water on the table next to me, my dad behind it, red-eyed, haunted. The girl in the robes – Panacea, Amy Dallon, it must be, I'd seen her picture on PHO – kept her detached expression as she told me
"You had severe infections, blood loss, cascading organ failure, insects consuming your flesh, a minor concussion, and nearsightedness. I cleaned your system, repaired your organs and limbs, and fixed the nearsightedness. I had to use your existing fat stores and muscles. You won't have enough strength left to move. You keep the concussion – I don't do brains."
She turned, walked out the door. I hadn't been asking what was wrong with me, but she was gone already.
"Dad."
"Yes, Taylor..." He seemed unsure, devastated. He was like this after Mom died, I think.
"Help? Water?"
Now he grabbed the glass, lifted it to my face, almost eagerly. Why couldn't he have helped a year ago? Even as I thought it I felt disgusting. I'd never told him. He should have suspected, I should have told him, it was my fault, mostly.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

There doesn't seem to be any emotional reaction to this situation. No disorientation and very little confusion. It's as if somebody turned off Taylor's brain, then turned it back on, and there was nothing in between. When people wake up there is usually a huge disconnect. Taylor is suddenly awake, apparently mostly aware of what is going on, and doesn't seem to have any emotional reaction to her new situation and instantaneous teleportation from school into a hospital bed.

TemporaryMeasure said:
It was two days before the hospital let me go, two days immobile in that white bed staring at that white ceiling eating that white food trying to move my limbs even a little bit and I was SO ready to leave.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Run-on sentence.

TemporaryMeasure said:
She had, however, used all but a strand of every muscle on every limb, and every scrap of fat.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

This seems to be a huge side-effect, with potentially enormous consequences. It's almost enough to put somebody in the hospital on its own.

TemporaryMeasure said:
I'd been in the locker for a whole day before a vandal found me, or so I'd been told. I wasn't conscious for all that.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Why did a vandal find her? What vandal? What did he vandalize?

TemporaryMeasure said:
So it was a weekend, or precisely fifty-eight hours, before I was forced to go to the worst place in the world.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

There needs to be an explanation (before or right after this sentence) why she was forced to go to school. It doesn't make sense to force somebody who can barely move to go to school. With the amount of muscle damage that she received it could even be dangerous because she could strain her body and hurt herself easily. Her father should have easily been able to go without her and provide a doctor's note or explanation why she was not there.

TemporaryMeasure said:
I spent that weekend teaching myself to code. I learned how to navigate the filesystem, how to write useful little snippets, how to steal from StackOverflow and look good doing it. I learned that I really ought to be commenting more, but I didn't learn to believe the user who told me that.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Yea, unless Taylor already triggered, this takes a LOT longer than a weekend. Taylor would be able to learn the very basics about the subject, but not much more - she would certainly not be able to learn how to code that quickly. Learning to code from scratch even on an introductory level takes months and a lot of practice. It takes longer to become proficient in software development. Expert developers usually take longer to learn a new language or framework.

TemporaryMeasure said:
I was keeping up my physical therapy, trying harder than I'd ever tried at anything before to rebuild my muscles. When they're back I'll take up running, learn to fight if I can afford it.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Wait, she started "keeping up" with her physical therapy over the weekend? Because that's how long it was before she had to go to the meeting at school. This makes no sense. She could start on her physical therapy - and she should do start on it very, very slowly and carefully. It's easy to overdo things and hurt yourself - which is why there are physical therapists that specialize in this.

TemporaryMeasure said:
Looking over, though, she's sort of crumpled inwards. fuck you, blackwell.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Punctuation, capitalization.

TemporaryMeasure said:
But now, when I opened up my bookmark, I saw an odd new button in the top right. [ / ].
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

This is a strange disconnect - Taylor has an instinctive knowledge and understanding of systems and information that she doesn't have access to, and yet here she just has to use a button or link that magically appears on-screen on various web pages? And she doesn't immediately notice the button or knows what it is for?

The way this is described, it doesn't seem like a Worm-style power - it's more like an SI or Gamer ability than anything else.

Is this supposed to be a Shaker ability that modifies web applications and documents and injects code that gives Taylor access to various admin systems? Or is this button imaginary, and in Taylor's head? It would make much more sense for the ability to be a Thinker or Tinker power of some sort that gave Taylor knowledge of passwords or allowed her to break into systems or code up the access methods to the underlying servers. Thematically this power doesn't make sense IMHO, because this makes it disjointed and confusing when compared to her other power.

TemporaryMeasure said:
And, I guess to assuage my conscience,
  • Hack and administrate social media sites for fun and games
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

I don't understand - how is hacking social media sites for fun and games supposed to assuage Taylor's conscience? If anything, this would weigh on her conscience.

TemporaryMeasure said:
"No, dad. Not the locker. It was today, at the meeting. When Blackwell decided it was me."
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Wait, so all of this happened within a day? And Taylor figured out her ability, experimented with it, and came up with a plan within a few hours? After an earth-shattering event for her psyche, where she emotionally broke and experienced the worst day of her life? Really? Is that all it takes her to get over something enormous and horrific?

TemporaryMeasure said:
And when I look at you, I can see the structure of our family, I can see the link between us and I can see what's wrong between us, and kind of how to fix it.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

It would be better to say that she sees the structure of DWA or something. That would be more interesting and complex than the structure of the family.

TemporaryMeasure said:
When morning put sunlight through her window, Taylor was in no way ready to face the day.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Previous chapters are in first person - here you switched to third person all of a sudden.

TemporaryMeasure said:
I sat in front of my computer, angled so that my background was the plain yellowed-white wall beside the stairs.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

This is again a very fast and abrupt transition. There needs to be at least some descriptions of the surroundings and an introduction between different sections and breaks of a chapter.

TemporaryMeasure said:
Like, this one law about digital copyright, it's meant to protect artists' revenues from their work, but instead it doesn't interface with society like that.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

This sentence doesn't scan - unless the artists' revenue is being attacked by their work.

TemporaryMeasure said:
The goddamn unfair suspension that I don't deserve and how DARE she–

I did my homework through the afternoon.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

That's an extremely mild reaction to something that's basically the worst thing that has happened to her, in her entire life, and caused her to basically break.
 
Last edited:
ElimGarak said:
This is a good start, but there are some systemic problems with the writing - at least in my opinion. Everything seems to feel very rushed and there are very few descriptions of the surroundings and events. Things happen far too quickly, and I see very few emotional consequences for anything. There needs to be a lot more showing of how various emotions affect characters (what they look like, how they sound, their body language, how they react, etc.) and very little telling. Taylor seems to emotionally deal with the worst day of her life in minutes, come up with a plan in a few hours, and everything progresses at a breakneck pace. You need to slow things down significantly - if Taylor can just handle her trigger event in a few minutes to a couple of hours then why is it that big of a deal?

There should also be more descriptions of the surroundings - what rooms look like, what people are wearing, what they look like, how they sound when they talk, etc.

You should also think about using something like Grammarly or some other tool to make sure the punctuation and grammar are correct.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
First of all, I want to thank you. I absolutely want advice about my writing, and this is GREAT. If you want to do this again in another few chapters, I would love that.
That said, there are a few bits of advice that I am going to have to not take. For instance: using Grammarly. I do use Grammarly, but sometimes I ignore it to achieve a specific effect. For instance, run-on sentences can express a feeling of monotony or of panic, depending on the word choice and other subtleties – that is what I was doing in the sentence about her being ready to leave the hospital. In general, most of my grammatical errors are intentional, although I admit their success in expressing a given emotion may be limited. Please assume I know how to grammar and am intentionally not grammaring when I don't.
Sometimes I do overuse a phrase, creating unintended repetition. That is often unintentional, and thank you for the advice about that.

By far the most important and well-received part of your advice, though, is to spend more time describing the physical surroundings and expressions of others. I agree, I have a tendency to want to get there, and I am not great at describing the scenery along the road to my destination. I will try to work on that.

This is a little technical note about powers: Taylor has two powers:
  • A power that gives her admin in any system to which she is connected, which is limited to digital systems because I am not counting, for instance, being a member of an organization as being connected to it.
  • A power that gives her an intuitive understanding of any system based on her proximity to it. Being connected counts as maximal proximity, as does physically being in the head office or main server room or etc. Being near members of that organization, or being a member of that organization, counts as diminishing proximity by the metaphorical closeness to the head of the organization. (Only one at a time though: looking at her dad, she could have chosen to look at the DWA structure, and probably I should have had her do that. No idea how I forgot that, oops. But only one system at a time.)
Note that the [ / ] button on web pages is power granted: it is not a feature of the web page, it is a feature of her power. Therefore, the intuition power gives her no information about it, and though her shard is connected to her, it is not connected to her. (Specifically, the shard-computer is directly exempting that connection for user-safety reasons.) So it is only by proximity to her shard that she would understand the results of it by the intuition power, and her shard is in an entire different dimension.
Therefore, her intuition power does not grant her intuition about the nature of her powers. This type of behavior is very in-line with Wildbowesque powers: powers tend to feed directly into and from the sensory and motor cortices, feeling like new senses/limbs. However, they don't come with a user manual. Tinkers have to figure out their specialty themselves, brutes have to get used to their strength, strikers and blasters don't know what will happen until they test it, etc.
Yes, the admin power is a little weird and hard to categorize, but it's not outside the abilities of shards, and it's kinda neato :) .

Also, RE "how did Taylor recover so quickly from her trigger event", she didn't. She spent almost a week in the hospital (doing PT, which regime she continues based on the instructions of a physical therapist over the weekend and beyond) and she is still hella messed up. When she thinks about it her mind completely derails and goes back to a panic attack, which she has to immediately shut down before she spirals. She is not over her trigger event, she is the Queen of Denial and she is trying very hard to not think about it. Ditto with the wakeup in the hospital (though I agree there should have been more disorientation, oops in retrospect): she doesn't wake up screaming about the locker because sometimes, when something very traumatic happens, the brain represses it so the person does not go insane. A lot of what seems like functionality in Taylor's thought processes is actually repression.

Also, I do not want to write an insane Taylor, that seems like not fun.

Oh, and on the topic of how long it takes to learn that amount of coding that she did over the weekend? There's some amount of mediocre sandboxed coding practice she's gotten in Mrs. Knott's class, but one weekend to learn the things described seems reasonable to me, because that's how long it took me. Not to learn it perfectly or anything, but to learn the basics, as described. She probably spent at least 10 hours that weekend on this, which is definitely enough time for the basics of all those things.

Anyway, on the whole, I appreciate all your advice immensely, and I hope you don't take this as some kinda unappreciative backtalk. I just wanted to explain some of my stylistic and narrative choices and express my appreciation for you. Thank you so much for reading my story and telling me what you think!
 
dracklor said:
Actually, has anyone ever run with the idea that Scion is really what he pretends to be?

A fic where he's "just" a mentally challenged version of Superman, instead of depressed Lovecraftian apocalypse?
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

DakieSalamander said:
Yes... though I can't remember the name. But there is a fic where Scion is the good guy. I think it's from @Ack ?
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
I've written two.

One was a short crack fic, where an SI ends up in Scion's head. (I, Scion).

The other was Celestial Worm, which is an AU where Scion isn't actually the bad guy.
 
TemporaryMeasure said:
First of all, I want to thank you. I absolutely want advice about my writing, and this is GREAT. If you want to do this again in another few chapters, I would love that.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Not a problem, I just hope I didn't sound abrupt or harsh - sometimes that happens to me. Also, some people don't take to criticism very well (people have flamed me for this type of feedback). This is your story, your choices are your own, and I am just providing my personal feedback that is completely subjective and will often not be the same as that of other readers. A lot of people enjoy what others dislike, and all that.

TemporaryMeasure said:
Please assume I know how to grammar and am intentionally not grammaring when I don't.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Sure, no worries - there are numerous world-renown books that have intentionally horrible grammar to reflect various characters. :)

Also, some people just don't care - there is a case in the 19th century where a guy wrote a very popular book without any punctuation. In the second edition, he added an extra page with just punctuation marks, telling people to just put them where they wanted to.

TemporaryMeasure said:
A power that gives her admin in any system to which she is connected, which is limited to digital systems because I am not counting, for instance, being a member of an organization as being connected to it.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
TemporaryMeasure said:
Note that the [ / ] button on web pages is power granted: it is not a feature of the web page, it is a feature of her power.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

OK, this brings up several questions - would somebody watching over Taylor's shoulder see this button, or is it entirely in her imagination? Is the button injected into the local copy of the software she is running (the HTML page on her local system) or is it injected on the server? Does the button make server-side changes and code injection? Does it modify the software on remote servers, or just modify the values in server-side databases and settings based on Taylor's wishes and/or actions? Unlike with most powers, a software engineer could put the entire system under a debugger (client machine, network monitor, and server machine) and look at all the steps in the chain, if any.

TemporaryMeasure said:
Also, RE "how did Taylor recover so quickly from her trigger event", she didn't. She spent almost a week in the hospital (doing PT, which regime she continues based on the instructions of a physical therapist over the weekend and beyond) and she is still hella messed up. When she thinks about it her mind completely derails and goes back to a panic attack, which she has to immediately shut down before she spirals.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

It sounded like Taylor spent only a couple of days at most doing supervised PT, since Panacea would have fixed her almost entirely nearly instantaneously and there would be no need for Taylor to be in a coma, undergo surgery, etc. There is no indication that I noticed of these panic attacks. I think this confusion could be solved by showing some effects of these attacks and effects, at least in 3rd person.

Also, muscles don't normally grow that quickly (unless Panacea made a tweak) - so a few days of muscle exercises won't give you much or any effect. Being a body-builder (which is what this amounts to) for a week won't do much for somebody besides make them exhausted.

TemporaryMeasure said:
A lot of what seems like functionality in Taylor's thought processes is actually repression.

Also, I do not want to write an insane Taylor, that seems like not fun.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

I think there could be a middle ground. Taylor could be repressing all the time, but there could be various side effects shown without making her seem insane. Repression is not insanity anyway. E.g. she could notice a few seconds or minutes of missing time, notice that she broke a pencil that she was holding, knocked over a cup she was drinking, was sweaty and breathing hard, and so on. Peppering these small clues in the story would make it more obvious that there is something else going on. Making them taper off in time could indicate that she is getting better.

TemporaryMeasure said:
Anyway, on the whole, I appreciate all your advice immensely, and I hope you don't take this as some kinda unappreciative backtalk. I just wanted to explain some of my stylistic and narrative choices and express my appreciation for you. Thank you so much for reading my story and telling me what you think!
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Not a problem - I am glad I could help. The whole process of writing is very personal and is in many respects a skill, one that improves with practice. Furthermore, this is your story so how it progresses and what you write is completely up to you. My feedback is entirely subjective, so feel free to take any or none of my opinions under advisement.
 
ElimGarak said:
You should also think about using something like Grammarly or some other tool to make sure the punctuation and grammar are correct.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Don't use Grammarly for grammar unless you want your work to be written for a business or classroom purpose. I was using it for a while on my own fiction (including some as yet unpublished Worm fics), and it was constantly correcting the usage of things that I know to be grammatically correct (just not what it's programmed to be used to), or telling me to fix the grammar in written conversations. Gets a little irritating to have 57 'incorrect' things in a chapter when they're all in conversations. I've no problem with it for papers or business, but not for fiction.
 
Kinsfire said:
Don't use Grammarly for grammar unless you want your work to be written for a business or classroom purpose. I was using it for a while on my own fiction (including some as yet unpublished Worm fics), and it was constantly correcting the usage of things that I know to be grammatically correct (just not what it's programmed to be used to), or telling me to fix the grammar in written conversations. Gets a little irritating to have 57 'incorrect' things in a chapter when they're all in conversations. I've no problem with it for papers or business, but not for fiction.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

I can totally see that - the only reason I bring up Grammarly is because it catches a lot more of the common errors that other grammar checkers seem to miss. E.g. missing words, tense changes, incorrect verb conjugation, etc. However, I can totally see it being too focused on one mode or style and becoming annoying and less useful.

Just out of curiosity, can you suggest some other grammar checker engine? I know that Word used to have one that could be set to various types of writing styles, but I don't know if it is still viable or how it compares to others.
 
Sounds like it would be great to use as a final pass, as long as you aren't overly sensitive to seeing red numbers. Having to consider skipping intentional stuff in dialog seems like a pretty cheap tradeoff to me, since there's going to be unintentional glitches in there too.
 
Remove ads
Antivirus 1.2
  • Threadmarks
    • A/N: Sorry about the long period of time before the update, it took me a while to get going with this because I got distracted by other things in life. But SysAdmin is back, and here to stay. Also, yes. Wyrm is what I have decided to rename Python. Haha look at me I am so funny.

    Also, links to the works quoted: Letter from Birmingham Jail- Martin Luther King, The Present Crisis- James Russell Lowell
    Minor trigger warning: mention of rape.
    Ugh.

    All the lovely helpful people talking about programming on internet forums love to tell you why everyone should learn to code. "Coding is like learning a new language!" they proclaim. "Coding helps you think in new ways!" they expound. "If you learn to program, you not only get a valuable skill in the modern economy, but also improve your ability to formulate plans and solve problems." I've heard that one at least three times on StackOverflow alone.

    But none of them ever mention the dreams.

    Did you know that if you spend four hours after dinner (a delicious bean-based sloppy joe, which is maybe partly at fault?) doing nothing other than solving Project Euler problems in C++, you start seeing semicolons behind your eyelids when you finally close them? I woke up twice in the night in a cold sweat, with memories of a glowing screen and inscrutable type errors glowering in my amygdala. I wish I could have just programmed it in Wyrm, with its intuitive syntax and multitudinous packages, but nooooo, I had to decide it was time to face the reality of memory allocation.

    Ugh.

    Honestly, though, it's worth learning. Not because any regular programming I do won't be possible in Wyrm – far from it. Dragon's programming language is a beautiful thing, and she's my new favorite tinker. (Sorry Armsmaster – you'll always have a place in my heart. And underwear drawer, I guess. What was that marketing agency thinking‽) Wyrm is a high-level programming language, though: it can play with files all you like, but it can't directly reach out and touch the bytes. Why would you need to, unless you want to pull root-level shenanigans that aren't supposed to be allowed, or read and analyze supposedly deleted data?

    But me and my power, we do need to play in the jungle gym of ones and zeros. It's where we thrive. And yes: nothing is stopping me from just writing Wyrm code to do simple file searches and posting and editing, and I'll do plenty of that. But for those unique situations where people hide or delete evidence, or where I need to change a security system or twist a backdoor to my benefit?

    Nothing will do but C++.

    And Assembly, I guess, but I'm not crazy.

    So I spent last night doing my level best to learn it and make a few useful snippets of code. It's part of the plan. See, I've had a couple of days to think about it, not to mention the sleepless clarity of 5 A.M. this morning. The trouble is, I can join the PRT and protect people, and I'd be a hero, but not a hero.

    Mom taught me that. Not on purpose, I don't think, although for all her warmth I wouldn't put a little sneakiness past her. She showed me what a hero was when she let me read To Kill a Mockingbird. She showed me what a hero was when she accidentally left 1984 out on the coffee table and I snuck it to my room and read it cover to cover.

    She showed me what it meant to be a hero when she stood up for her student, whose allegations of rape against a wealthy donor's kid were ignored by the university.

    It just took me this long to learn what she'd taught me. Would she be proud, or disappointed?

    The university didn't appreciate what she'd done, of course. They didn't dare to retaliate visibly, but Mom never quite got tenure, and I heard her crying in the kitchen with Dad a few times. But the student? She was still a student, and that rapist's name got plastered all over the media. The Stansfields had never quite made up for that black mark on their reputation.

    So, what is the difference? What separates a hero from a hero? After all, the PRT fights back the encroachment of crime, and Brocton Bay University fights the even more dangerous encroachment of ignorance. What is that quality they imitate, though it floats beyond their reach? Mom knew, and now I know. Martin Luther King knew it, too, as he sat in Birmingham Jail: "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere." A hero may compromise with crime and may parley with practicality. A hero makes alliances with other heroes, and keeps them even when dishonesty and minor evil is required, for they work towards the common good. Society runs on heroes, functions only because those many practical good men do something, and evil does not triumph.

    But sometimes compromise is too damning, too dirty to be permitted. Sometimes hiding the truth to maintain the trust of the public is like building a dam with no outlet. So we also need heroes, like my mother or MLK or Atticus Finch. People who fight not for the greater good, but for the greatest. Those who champion honesty, transparency, and freedom. And nobody is safe from such people. Not villains, not heroes, not the PRT or the United States government or anyone at all. As a small child, and even now, I am a fan of the Protectorate. But I am also a citizen of the Bay, and I can see the crumbling walls and the gang tags. MLK's imprisoned words again put it best:

    "So often the contemporary church is a weak, ineffectual voice with an uncertain sound. So often it is an archdefender of the status quo. Far from being disturbed by the presence of the church, the power structure of the average community is consoled by the church's silent—and often even vocal—sanction of things as they are."

    And as I consider his words, a poem I'd read years ago becomes the forefront of my consciousness, and I am certain about what I will do.

    We see dimly in the Present what is small and what is great,
    Slow of faith how weak an arm may turn the iron helm of fate,
    But the soul is still oracular; amid the market's din,
    List the ominous stern whisper from the Delphic cave within,—
    "They enslave their children's children who make compromise with sin."

    I won't just be a Ward, a hero working to fix the systems from within. I'll be a hero. And if they call me a villain, it will only betray their own myopia.

    My alarm rings, jarring me out of contemplation – it's time for morning physical therapy. I'm almost strong enough to stand if assisted, I think. The doctor says it should only be a few more days. But it's still so tiring.

    Ugh.


    Alright. It's time. I've done physical therapy, moved, stretched, almost got out of the chair. Lacey came over and helped me "shower", which I appreciate. She's proof that the Protectorate doesn't have a monopoly on heroes. And when I got done, Dad had breakfast made for us both. Honestly, you wouldn't think the barest bit of physical activity that the doctor orders should count as a workout, but I'm always sore after it, and these days I'm far more hungry than I used to be. I've put on maybe ten pounds in the last week, and somehow I didn't even notice. Just thinking about that makes me feel fat, but I touch my stomach and I still feel like paper layered over organs, though now it feels like there's a bit of muscle in the way, actually.

    Anyway, it's time. Not to go visit the PRT, or to take Armsmaster's phone call. I guess Watchdog isn't done chewing. They must have a pretty long queue. Queue's a funny word – so many vowels, and they're all useless. I'm stalling.

    Nothing for it. Just got to log into my computer, log into PHO, access the central server, and introduce myself. Untraceably, of course, but that's easy when you have the kind of access I do. Here goes.

    ■​

    Welcome to the Parahumans Online message boards.
    You are currently logged in, Armsmaster
    You are viewing:
    • Threads you have replied to
    • AND Threads that have new replies
    • OR private message conversations with new replies
    • Thread OP is displayed.
    • Ten posts per page
    • Last ten messages in private message history.
    • Threads and private messages are ordered chronologically.
    ■​

    ♦ Topic: A Modest Introduction
    In: Boards ► Boston ► New Capes ► Cape Verification
    Sudo     (Original Poster) (The Guy in the Know) (Verified Cape) (Not a tinker)
    Posted On Jan 20th 2011:
    Hey everyone, I'm Sudo, a new cape in Boston. This thread is by way of introduction and verification. I won't say too much about the nature of my powers, just that I know more than you want me to, and I'm not a tinker. I am a hero, by which I mean that I fight against injustice. I'll be seeking out corruption and abuse of power, then shining a light on it for all to see.



    ​
    (Showing page 1 of 58)


    ►Procto the Unfortunate Tinker (Not a tinker)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    Hey, how'd you get that tag? I only got mine after the mods had a fit over my username. Also, speaking of mods, you know you gotta post some kinda proof, if you're on this board, right? Wait, how'd you get verified already with no proof?


    ►Tin_Mother (Moderator) (Banned)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    Procto is right, @Sudo. You aren't allowed to make a post here with no proof. I suggest a photo in costume, if you've been seen around, or some kind of demonstration of your powers. I'm giving you a warning, and I'd like to have a stern talk with whichever mod gave you those tags.


    ►Sudo (Original Poster) (The Guy in the Know) (Verified Cape) (Not a tinker)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    No thank you on the warning, @Tin_Mother, and I unfortunately can't tell you which mod it was.


    ►Tin_Mother (Moderator) (Banned)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    Don't talk back to mods, @Sudo. We're here to keep the peace and rules. I'm banning you for 24 hours and taking down this thread.


    ►Sudo (Original Poster) (The Guy in the Know) (Verified Cape) (Not a tinker)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    No thank you. I don't like to get banned, and you're being rude. You can have the ban yourself. And this thread is staying up, it's important to me.


    ►Char
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    ...What.
    What just happened.
    @Sudo, did you just ban a mod? Did you just ban Mother? What.
    What!


    ►Dragon (Verified Cape) (Guild)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    Well, now. This is interesting. I'd like to know how you did that, @Sudo.


    ►Mr. Mephistopheles (Admin)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    What the hell???
    This... shouldn't be possible. Tin_Mother called me in, I was expecting a standard hacker.
    Except, the server has no record of Tin_Mother being issued a ban by another user, she just -has- a ban now. With no source. And Sudo is supposed to have user data, like approximate geography, and post count, and IP. And all of that is missing. It's all missing. Except for the IP.


    The IP is from our central server.


    Nobody is IN our central server, it's cooled by a river and not a pleasant place to hang out and post stuff, but that point's moot, since this isn't an IP of a computer connected to the server, it's the ACTUAL SERVER.


    And there's just straight up no option to do admin actions on Sudo, though Tin_Mother swears there were. Or to delete this thread.


    It's like Sudo is the server. Calling it now, folks, it's a ghost.


    Admin, signing off.


    ►Brocktonite03 (Veteran Member)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    Well. Ghost in the Machine, huh? I guess that's one way to provide proof for verification. Also, banning Tin_Mother? Whattttt
    ​

    End of Page. 1, 2, 3 ... 56, 57, 58


    ​
    (Showing page 2 of 58)


    ►Sudo (Original Poster) (The Guy in the Know) (Verified Cape) (Not a tinker) (Ghost in the Machine)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    Ooh, ghost in the machine? I like that one. Also, yep! You've figured out my cunning plan to get verified. Next step? Go be a ghost in someone else's machine, and tell everybody about the nasty crimes against justice I find. I wonder which corruption I'll uproot? Best to start small, I think.


    ►Reave (Verified PRT Agent)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    Sudo, I like the desire to be a hero, but I have to warn you: going snooping in people's computers is actually a crime, and a serious one if it's government computers. If you come to your local PRT office, we can help you turn that on villains. Be a hero with us. Don't be a vigilante like this.


    ►Uber (Verified Cape)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    Hey @Reave, quit being a PRT shill. Sudo's gonna fight the power, and man, you're the power. Just because someone's being anti-this-establishmentarian doesn't make them wrong.


    Hey @Sudo, you've got allies in Leet and me. We don't like the tight-laced tyrants much, and you seem like you've got a sense of humor. PM us anytime.


    ►Sudo (Original Poster) (The Guy in the Know) (Verified Cape) (Not a tinker) (Ghost in the Machine)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    @Reave First of all, the PRT probably has its fair share of little corruptions, and I'll be digging them up if I get bored, but it's not like I'm setting out to break the law for the hell of it. I'm looking for people who are getting unjustly screwed over by those in power, and making that kind of thing public. Don't want to experience my attention? Easy, just don't act like slime.


    @Uber, I like your material, but I don't think I can work with actual villains. Start doing a better job of keeping your stuff from hurting innocent civilians, and maybe I become interested in helping, or even featuring. But primarily, I'm a hero. I'd work with entertainers, but only if they were good people too.


    @Everyone, if you know about a miscarriage of justice that's being kept under wraps, shoot me a PM. I'll delete it without a trace, and nobody will know you told me, but I will do my best to bring it to light.


    ►Antigone
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    What the hell? Did you just ping everyone to come to this thread?


    ►Chaosfaith
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    Wait how the hell did you ping everyone to come here?? Is that every user on PHO? WTF!


    ►Dawgsmiles (Veteran Member)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    Wow, I think that's the worst example of Reply All Syndrome I have ever born witness to. @Sudo, be more careful please?


    ►Sudo (Original Poster) (The Guy in the Know) (Verified Cape) (Not a tinker) (Ghost in the Machine)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    ...oops.
    I promise I won't do that again. Sorry, guys.


    ►Dragon (Verified Cape) (Guild)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    @Sudo, I'd like for you to contact me, maybe we can work together on some projects.


    ►Sudo (Original Poster) (The Guy in the Know) (Verified Cape) (Not a tinker) (Ghost in the Machine)
    Replied On Jan 20th 2011:
    @dragon, read the tag. Why do you think I put it there? I'm not a tinker. That said, if you need something hacked for the side of good, let me know.


    ​
    End of Page. 1, 2, 3, 4 ... 56, 57, 58
    ■​

    Colin looked at the PHO icon and moved his eyes in the pattern that closed the window, then closed his eyes and took a little breath. And sighed.

    "Dragon?"


    A/N: I stealth edited it so that she posts in and claims to be from Boston, since several people have pointed out that it would be pants-on-head stupid for Taylor to tell the truth about where she's from for no reason. I am trying not to hand her the idiot ball or the genius ball, but writing is a new skill and also I am not very smart. I will do my best, but I appreciate y'alls input. So, stealth editing. And before you say it's weird that so many brockton bay natives are commenting here, Boston and Brockton are neighbors so the dedicated cape fans are going to be keeping track of at least the new capes section in both boards. This is not to say Armsmaster can't still put 2 and 2 together to get 4, but it shouldn't be that easy.
     
    Last edited:
  • Threadmarks
    • Long Shot said:
    Will tay-tay find out who specific protagonist is ?
    Click to expand...
    Click to shrink...
    Fun fact, SpecificProtagonist is not canon Madison, FlippinMad is. But that canon was made after Silencio created the SpecificProtagonist PHO handle for Madison, and since then Fanon has had that either be her handle, or Browbeat's, or sometimes both.
    Anyways, telling you whether Taylor will find out who SpecificProtagonist is would be entirely spoilers, and therefore I shouldn't. But I do like the way you think. And sometimes, when it is more fun, I will follow some minor fanon. Or when I mess up, which I inevitably will.
     
    She should next go on PHO and reveal that MedHall is a front for the E88. She can reason that it was legal to get this information by tracking E88 communication lines directly to MedHall. Also, even though the E88 are villains, they can technically be classified as terrorists since they are an offshoot of the German terrorist cape organization in Europe and because their ideology goes directly against the values of American society and the natural rights of all people, genders, ethnicities, and races.
     
    Reader mode
    You must login or register to reply here.
    Remove ads
    Back
    Top