Chapter 21 - Why We Fight, Part Two
Why We Fight, Part Two
Ciel was on watch. Rainbow in turn watched her for a moment, standing in the open doorway of the railway car, looking out as the landscape flew past. If anything happened, Ciel would spot it and wake the others who were all sleeping in the small arms car that they had claimed for their living space.
If anything happened, Ciel would spot it.
Rainbow turned away and headed into the next car along, where she and Twi wouldn't be disturbing anybody else.
Twilight was already waiting for her in the other carriage, sitting demurely on her knees in front of all the battle droids with her scroll out and held in front of her. A smile played across her features as she waited, and her face brightened as Rainbow Dash came in. "Are you ready?"
"Yeah," Rainbow said as she sat down besides Twilight, their shoulders touching their bodies leaning against one another.
Twilight's folder was not, as Rainbow's was, labelled 'Spectacular Six.' Twilight had gone with the more prosaic 'Friends.'
She clicked on it.
Five boxes appeared on the screen, all black, all waiting for responses. Rainbow's scroll began to buzz, but she ignored it.
"Aren't you going to get that?" Twilight asked. "It might be something important."
"Very funny," Rainbow said.
One of the black boxes was replaced by the image of Pinkie Pie, her face pressed so close to her scroll that she was obscuring everything behind her. "DASHIE! Twilight!"
"Hi, Pinkie," Twilight said.
Rainbow grinned. "Hey, Pinkie, how's it going?"
"Things are going pretty great around here," Pinkie answered. "I mean, not as great as they'd be if you two were here, obviously, but apart from that, they're going pretty great. I just got back from throwing Sweetie Belle's birthday party-"
"Wait, that was today?" Rainbow asked. "Was I supposed to send a present or something?"
"Don't worry, darling. I had no expectations on that front," Rarity said as she joined the call. "Now, if it had been Scootaloo's birthday, then I think we all would have had some rather harsh words for you."
"I would have had some harsh words for me too," Rainbow agreed.
"It's fine, Rainbow Dash," Rarity assured her. "No one expects to get a present from a friend of their older sister. Twilight, how are you, dear?"
"I'm fine, Rarity, thank you for asking."
"I'm delighted to hear it, darling. I only ask because I know that being out in the field isn't your natural habitat."
"Hey, it's not like she's having to survive by herself," Rainbow said indignantly. "I take care of her."
"I know you do, Rainbow, but even so," Rarity said. "Twilight, are you sure you're alright?"
Twilight smiled fondly. "I'm very sure, thank you, Rarity," she said. "Rainbow takes very good care of me."
"I'm glad to hear it, and I'm sure you know your own state best, so I won't ask again," Rarity said. "I'm terribly sorry, Pinkie dear, I seem to have interrupted you."
"It's okay," Pinkie said amiably. "It was a pretty great party for Sweetie Belle though, wasn't it?"
"Oh, you outdid yourself, Pinkie; the girls had an absolutely marvellous time."
Fluttershy was the next to join the call. "I'm sorry, am I late?"
"Not really, we were just missing you," Rainbow said. "How are you doing, Fluttershy?"
"Is Applejack coming?" Pinkie asked.
"Yes," Fluttershy said. "She just had to-"
"Howdy, folks; sorry, but I'd left my scroll back at camp when I went to fetch some water," Applejack said as her video-feed cut in to join the rest of them. She pushed her hat upwards on her head. "Well, how's everyone doin' tonight?"
"We got our tickets to the Vytal Festival!" Pinkie chirruped eagerly. "Rarity paid for mine and for the hotel and everything!"
"Really?" Twilight asked. "That's very generous of you, Rarity."
"Yes, well, in this case, it's my parents' generosity that you should be praising," Rarity said, sounding slightly uncomfortable at the praise she was receiving. "Once they understood that we wanted to see our friend closer than on a television screen, they were happy enough to pay for an extra ticket. It makes sense to make all the arrangements now before the good hotels in Vale get booked up and to make them together like we have with Scootaloo and the Apples so that we're all staying together and don't have to go out of our way to find each other. Fluttershy, Applejack, do you think you'll be able to make it to the festival for a reunion, or will your ramble through the countryside keep you away?"
Fluttershy and Applejack glanced at each other, or at least, that was what it seemed like they were doing; it was hard to say for sure on the screen of a scroll.
"We'll be back," Fluttershy declared. "It doesn't matter if we have to cut my trip a little short. I'll make it back in time for us to cheer you on."
"You don't have to do that," Rainbow declared. "If you're seeing, like, some super rare butterflies or-"
"Rainbow Dash," Fluttershy said gently. "Do you mean to say this isn't important to you?"
Rainbow had always found it incredibly hard to lie to Fluttershy, although not for the same reasons that it was hard to lie to Applejack. It was hard to lie to Applejack because she could tell as often as not when you were making something up, but it was hard to lie to Fluttershy for the simple reason that you felt like a jackass afterwards.
And so you told the truth.
And the truth was… this was important to her. Even if she wouldn't be able to go all the way to the one-on-one rounds like she wanted to – that honour being reserved for Penny – the fact remained that this was a huge deal for her, a chance for her to strut her stuff on the biggest stage in all of Remnant, a chance for her to stand in front of the world and say 'I'm Rainbow Dash, and this is how awesome I am!' A chance for her to show Scootaloo that you could be whatever you wanted to be, so long as you were willing to work hard for it.
"Yeah," she murmured. "This matters to me."
"Then I'll be there, in the front row," Fluttershy promised. "We both will."
Rainbow smiled. "Thanks, Fluttershy. Thanks, girls. That… it really means a lot."
"How are things going out there, Fluttershy?" Twilight asked.
"Oh, it's been wonderful so far," Fluttershy exclaimed. "Without human habitation to worry about, animals have been able to thrive all over Vale. So far, we've seen otters and beavers and badgers and hedgehogs, and we even got chased by wild boar once after we strayed into their territory."
"You're sure that wasn't a boarbatusk, right?" Rainbow asked anxiously.
"I know the difference between a boar and a boarbatusk," Applejack declared proudly. "It definitely wasn't black, and it definitely didn't have any bone on the outside. Besides, if it had been a grimm, I would have just shot it, or else sicced Winona on it, but on account of it being a boar-"
"I didn't think that we should hurt it," Fluttershy said. "After all, we were the ones who trespassed into its territory." She smiled. "But thanks to Applejack, I've had a great time, and I'll have learned so much by the time we come back to Vale for the festival. Rarity, how are things going with you?"
"Oh, absolutely fabulous, darling, so kind of you to ask," Rarity said. "I've just discovered a new kind of fabric that is just delightful to work with, and…"
Rainbow lost track of how long they'd been talking, of how long Rarity discoursed on her new fabrics, how long Pinkie talked about her new cupcake recipes, how they checked up on the pets she was looking after for them, how they just talked about everything and nothing at all, about one another and their sisters and their families and their lives. Lives that had nothing to do with the grimm or war or the White Fang because Rainbow and Applejack kept them safe from all that – Pinkie, Rarity, and Fluttershy, at least; they'd been unable to prevent Twilight being dragged into it.
They talked, and there were times when it felt as though they were all sitting around the table in Sugarcube Corner, eating ice-cream sundaes like they had last year, back in Atlas.
She really hoped that they could all meet up in person for the Vytal Festival; she hoped that Pinkie could envelop them all in a great big hug, that they could sit down and talk in person, that it could be a little more like the old days than even this was.
She hoped it could be so.
They talked and talked, and it was only when Twilight started to yawn that Rainbow realised that they'd probably been at this for quite some time.
"I think we should probably call it a night," she said sheepishly.
"No," Twilight said. "I'm sorry, I-"
Applejack chuckled. "Don't worry, sugarcube; wherever we are, we all need to be fresh come morning. Looks like this is goodbye for now."
"Ooh, ooh, one more thing before we all say goodbye," Pinkie said. She beamed brightly as she began to sing, "Oh oh oh, oh oh oh."
Rainbow shook her head. "No, no, we are not singing."
"Aww, come on, Rainbow!"
"I'm sorry, Pinkie, but if Sunset Shimmer hears me singing that song, she'll never-" Rainbow hesitated, because what was more important really, her friend or Sunset? "You know what? Screw Sunset, let's go for it. Come on, Pinkie, lead us in."
"Oh oh oh," Pinkie began.
"Oh oh oh," Rainbow added.
"You are my Canterlot Girls," they both sang together as, one by one, the others joined in.
"You turn the light switch on,
It brightens up my day like the sun,
When my friends come a runnin',
You were right all along,
That together we're always better,
We could turn a sketch into a masterpiece,
When you are here I feel like I'm complete,
You are my Canterlot Girls!"
They giggled as they signed off one by one, each bidding the others goodnight until they met again.
Until they met again.
If they ever met again, if the battles against the White Fang or the grimm did not claim her life, if Applejack and Fluttershy managed to make it back to Vale okay, if, if, so many damn ifs.
"Rainbow Dash?" Twilight asked as she hung up.
"Yeah?"
"We're going to make it, aren't we?" Twilight said. "Us, Applejack, Fluttershy. We're all going to make it and see our friends again."
Rainbow looked at her. "Yeah. You're going to make it. I-"
"No, Rainbow Dash, not me, us," Twilight said firmly, even fervently. "I know that you'd give your life to save me, but that's not what I want to know. I want to know if we're all going to make it. I want you to tell me that we're all going to make it, even… even if it isn't true."
Rainbow tried to smile. "We're all going to make it," she said. "We're all going to make it, and we're all going to meet up at the Vytal Festival and have ice cream, just like old times."
When you are here I feel like I'm complete.
When will we be complete again?
At the Vytal festival, maybe?
I hope so.
I really hope so.
Fluttershy, Applejack, stay safe. Wherever you are, stay safe.
XxXxX
Blake had climbed up onto the roof of the train, the better to get a clear view of the world on both sides of the southward bound train. She was aware that there was a risk that she might be spotted, many faunus of the White Fang having night vision as good as Blake herself, but she hoped that, if there was anyone out watching the train, then they wouldn't be dissuaded from their mission by the presence of a single sentry.
And besides, she wanted to take a look. She would rather see the ambush coming, even if it was a bit of a risk.
And so, she stood upon the roof of the railcar, her legs spread out a little for balance as the train rattled and rumbled along.
She looked to the left and to the right and saw nothing. Her feline eyes pierced the darkness and saw nothing; it might be the trees concealed them, but it might be that there was – as yet – nothing to see.
With good fortune, that would, indeed, prove to be the case. It would be better for everyone if the confrontation to which they were hurtling – to which they aimed to be hurtling – took place under the light of the sun when more than just Blake could see clearly.
"Blake?" the voice was Sun's. Blake glanced over her shoulder to see him clambering onto the train roof after her. He spread his arms out on either side of him, swaying left and right for a moment before he got his balance on the moving surface sorted.
"What are you doing up here?" he asked. "Is everything okay?"
"I'm just taking a look around," Blake said. She paused. "Why wouldn't everything be okay?"
"I don't know," Sun said. "You just look a little… broody." He grinned. "I guess that's just the default with you, huh?"
Blake's eyes narrowed.
Sun's smile widened endearingly, or at least, he seemed to hope that it was endearing.
Blake rolled her eyes. "I'm not brooding," she muttered. "Not right now, anyway."
"That's good to hear," Sun replied. He took a cautious step towards her, and then another, his tail sticking straight out behind him like he was trying to use it to help him balance. "Because, if you have anything that you need to brood on, you know you can always talk to me instead, right?"
Blake turned to face him. "I… need to get better at remembering that," she admitted. "Anyway, we should go back down into the train."
"Right now?" Sun asked. "Do we have to?"
Blake frowned. "Is there something wrong with you?" she asked.
"No," Sun answered quickly. "Not wrong, exactly, I just… can we talk?"
"Up here?" Blake said. "You don't seem very comfortable."
"I'm not," Sun admitted. "But no one can overhear us up here."
The frown remained on Blake's face. "What's wrong?"
"Do you remember what you were talking to Pyrrha about earlier today?" Sun asked. "When you were talking about Penny's fairy tales?"
"I… sure," Blake said. "The Little Angel, right?"
"You talked about transformation," Sun reminded her. "You, uh, you weren't much of a fan."
"No," Blake murmured. The idea of changing yourself to fit someone else's idea of what you ought to be, it… it hit too close to home for her to enjoy stories like that anymore. Pyrrha might say that the angel was becoming her true self so that she could love and be loved, and that was all very well for Pyrrha to say – and Blake could even see why Pyrrha wanted to see it so; she would even say that for Pyrrha, it really was happening just like that, Jaune had seen her for who she really was and appreciated her for it. But Blake had thought that she was becoming once, becoming the person she was meant to be and being seen and loved for who she really was… but she had gradually come to realise that what she had thought was becoming was really Adam forcing her to become someone who suited him better.
If the prince really loved her, then she wouldn't have needed to shed her wings to obtain his love.
And if he didn't know her, then she was stupid to cast away a part of who she was in the hope that they would fall in love.
Because she didn't love him; how could she? What she felt was… just dangerous.
"Did you mean it?" Sun asked anxiously.
"I did," Blake replied and noticed that he seemed to wilt a little as he said. "Sun, why are you asking me this?"
"I just… I don't think that all change has to be a bad thing, does it?" Sun asked. "I mean it's not as though we start out perfect, right? We've all got things we can improve on."
"Of course, and I don't dispute that," Blake said. "I know that I'm not perfect, but that-" She cut herself off. She hadn't talked too much to Sun – or to anyone – about Adam or about what it had been like with him. They couldn't be ignorant of the fact that she and Adam had been together, but at the same time… she didn't want to spill the truth, not even to Sun. She felt she had a right to that much privacy. "There's a difference," she whispered, "between me recognising that I have flaws and trying to move past them and someone else deciding that who I am isn't good enough and that I should change to please them better. No one should change who they are for someone else."
"I'm willing to change," Sun said. "For you."
Blake gasped. Her eyes widened. She wished… she wished that he had said anything but that, anything at all. She would have rather that he ended things than say that as though it was a mark of his commitment. "Don't," she said. "Don't say that, Sun; you mustn't say that."
"Why not?"
"Because it makes me feel like him!" Blake cried, taking a step back and away from Sun. "And I'm not… I don't want to… I won't be like him. I won't remake you in my image and call it love."
"You're not," Sun declared. "You're not like that guy; you're not doing… that."
"Then why do you think that you should change who you are for my sake?"
"Because I'll lose you the way I am!" Sun shouted. "Because… because I'm not the guy you want, not like this. You don't want someone who can't settle down, someone whose feet start to itch if he stands still for too long, someone-"
"Footloose and fancy free?" Blake suggested. "Sun, if that's who you are, then I have no right to demand that you change that."
"But it's not who you are," Sun said. "Is it?"
"I…" Blake hesitated. "I don't know who I am, Sun. I don't know what's me and… and what are the parts that he made of me."
Sun stared into her eyes. "I do," he said. "You're not the person who walks away when the monster's gone; you're the person who stays and fights for what she believes in until all the problems are taken care of. And I-"
"Don't," Blake said, holding up one hand, and arm, so that the moonlight started glinting off her armband. "Please don't. I know that… that we don't seem to be a perfect fit, but… but that doesn't mean that you need to change who you are for me. I don't want you to change who you are for me."
"But-"
"It doesn't matter right now," Blake insisted. "Nothing is stopping us being together now, and later… I'm not ready to fall in love yet, not again, not after… and it has nothing to do with you." She forced a smile onto her face. "You're perfect just the way you are."
"For now," Sun murmured.
"Isn't 'for now' enough?" Blake asked.
"With you?" Sun asked. "Yeah, it's more than enough."
XxXxX
Jaune plucked at the strings of his guitar. "I, uh, I'm not really sure how good I am. I never had much of an audience outside of my sisters, but, uh, well… are you sure you want to hear this?"
Pyrrha smiled. "I can't wait," she said softly.
A flush of colour rose to Jaune's cheeks. "Okay then, well, why don't we-?"
"Pyrrha?"
Pyrrha looked around. It was Ruby who had spoken, but Ruby was standing behind Penny, half-hidden behind her, her hands upon the Atlesian girl's shoulders as though she was both supporting her and stopping her from running away, although why Penny would want to run away was something that Pyrrha couldn't fathom.
Pyrrha got to her feet; she and Jaune had both sat down for him to give her a performance, but now, she rose again. "Ruby, Penny," she greeted, "is something wrong?"
Penny certainly looked as though something was wrong, it had to be said; her head was bowed, and she had her hands clasped together in front of her. "N-no," she said, "there's nothing wrong." She hiccupped. "I should go."
"Penny, no," Ruby hissed, whispering something into Penny's ear.
Pyrrha took a step towards them. Her boots tapped against the metal floor of the train. "Penny, what's the matter?"
"Nothing!" Penny cried, before hiccupping again.
"Do you need me to go?" Jaune asked.
"No!" Penny said loudly, and this time, she didn't hiccup. "I… I've been given permission to tell all of you. I just…" She looked at Ruby, her expression stricken with fear.
Ruby nodded eagerly. "It'll be okay, Penny."
"Penny," Pyrrha said gently, "if there is something that you want to tell us, then there's no need for you to be afraid of saying it."
Penny didn't look reassured by that. "I… Ruby has something important to tell you on my behalf!"
"What?" Ruby cried. "This isn't what we talked about!"
"I want you to tell them," Penny said.
"Why?"
"Because you'll know how to say it."
"No, I don't!"
"But I don't know how to say it either!" Penny cried.
"Say what?" Jaune demanded. "Why don't one of you just spit it out, whatever it is?"
"Penny's a robot!" Ruby cried, her words followed hard upon by a squeak of alarm as her hands left Penny's shoulders and flew to her mouth.
Penny did not run, but she tensed to do so, her legs bending and bracing, her whole body lowering as though she were a sprinter waiting for the starting gun.
Pyrrha's eyes widened. A robot? Penny was a robot? That was… how was that possible?
"Oh," Jaune said, in a tone of flat surprise. "I… okay."
"Really?" Pyrrha asked, for want of anything else to say. Her mind seemed to have been dried of words.
Penny bowed her head, but it was still just about possible to make out a nod. "Yes," she said quietly. "I'm a robot. My father… built me in a lab in Atlas, with the help of Twilight and some other people you haven't met. That is the reason why Team Rosepetal gets changed in a different part of the locker room from all the other first years, even from Team Sapphire: it's because, if people saw me… outside of my clothes, I don't look entirely human."
Pyrrha didn't ask what that meant, and neither did Jaune. Pyrrha found herself staring and, upon realising it, felt ashamed of herself. Not just for staring but for the reasons why Penny looked so nervous around her which were now as clear as daylight in her mind.
She bowed, her teal drops, hanging on chains from her circlet, falling down on either side of her eyes. "I'm sorry, Penny."
Now, it was Penny's turn to gasp in surprise. "'Sorry'? But, sorry for what?"
"For what I said, earlier tonight," Pyrrha explained. "Knowing what I know now, I can only imagine how I must have upset you. That wasn't my intent, but we are judged not by our intentions, but by our deeds and by the effect those deeds have on others… but the effect that my words had on you which are plain to see. For that, I can only hope that my apology is enough, and if it is not… any way that I can make it up to you, I will."
"But… but I'm a robot," Penny protested. "Just like all of these androids on this train."
Pyrrha smiled thinly. "I don't think that you're exactly like them. You… you have aura, don't you?" It was the only explanation that made sense. She had seen Penny's aura on the board in combat class, when Penny had been called up to face some luckless opponent, and it was more logical to assume by that that Penny had aura than that everyone was somehow and for some reason being deceived into thinking that she had that which she, in truth, had not.
"Yes," Penny said. "I'm the world's first robot with aura."
Even though it was the response she had suspected and expected, hearing confirmation of it from Penny's own lips made Pyrrha's mouth form an O and her eyes widen a little. "Extraordinary," she murmured. She couldn't imagine how the idea had even been conceived of, let alone accomplished. Making aura? Making a soul? A religious person might have found the idea rather horrifying, but as somebody who ticked the 'spiritual, not religious' box on her census form, Pyrrha found herself rather in awe of the accomplishment.
"You have a soul, then," she said. "In that alone, you are nothing like any other robot in the world, and by being so unalike in the most important way… you're barely like them at all. I… I stand by what I said about Atlas's other robots, but you… you're not like them. You have a soul and, having a soul, are free."
Penny's lips twitched upwards in a smile. "Ruby said something like that."
"And Ruby can be very wise," Pyrrha said with a glance at her teammate. "Please don't take what I said to heart. I meant no offence by it."
"It's the control that Pyrrha objects to," Jaune said. "Isn't it? Not the… the robot-ness in and of itself."
"Indeed," Pyrrha said. "We're not just weapons, and because of that… we cannot stop asking if what we're being asked to do is the right thing. But you can question, as much as I can, you can ask, and you can refuse, for all that these other androids cannot. I'm sorry if you thought that I had something against you."
"It's okay," Penny murmured. "I… I think I understand why you feel the way you do, and I understand… it was just hard, to think that someone I admire so much might… hate me for what I am, so that who I was didn't matter anymore. Blake… she said that… she took it back, but I wasn't sure if… I'm so glad that you and Ruby feel this way."
"And me, too," Jaune said. "No matter what you're made of, you're still one of us in my book."
"Thank you, Jaune," Penny said sweetly. "Although…"
"Penny?" Pyrrha asked. "Is there something else?"
"I have permission to tell Team Sapphire the truth about what I am," Penny said, "but that doesn't change the fact that General Ironwood doesn't want many people to know about it, so you won't tell anyone else, will you?" she looked anxiously at Ruby, at Pyrrha, and at Jaune.
"Of course not," Ruby declared. "You're our friend; we would never do that to you."
"Your secret's safe with us," Jaune said.
"For my part, I promise that nobody will hear of it from me," Pyrrha vowed, placing one hand over her heart. "You have my word."
Penny smiled. "Thank you, Pyrrha. That means a lot."
"Although," Pyrrha added, "I don't see why the need to keep what… to keep your true nature a secret from everyone. What purpose does it serve?" And how would you keep it a secret for a long time? Did Penny age? It seemed a rude question to come out and ask her directly, but at the same time, Pyrrha could only assume that the answer was 'no,' because how could materials age in the way that a person did? Some people retained a youthful countenance – one of Pyrrha's beauty consultants had told her once that her skin would keep her looking young, provided she took proper care of it – but at some point, people were going to notice that Penny wasn't ageing a day over seventeen, surely? Looking closer to fifteen than seventeen, in point of fact. Why lie to the world, when it was sure to come out at some point?
"I think," Penny said, after a moment's thought, "that it's a little because some people might not like it – a robot who looks like a human, a synthetic being with aura – but mostly, I think it's just so I have an advantage in the tournament next semester. My father really wants me to win."
"I know exactly what you mean," Pyrrha said. "I…" She hesitated, but decided that, after sharing with Pyrrha and the rest her greatest secret, Penny might be said to be owed a secret from Pyrrha in return "My semblance is polarity," she said. "It gives me the power to manipulate metal."
Penny's eyes widened. "Really? But lots of people don't even think you've discovered your semblance! You've never-"
"Precisely," Pyrrha said. "Like you, I keep my full potential a secret in order to retain a competitive edge if I should need it. I suppose it makes competitive sense, although…"
"Although what?" Penny asked.
"Pyrrha," Jaune ventured, "hasn't always found that… Pyrrha… it's hard to explain, Penny; we should probably let Pyrrha tell you."
"Tell me something, Penny," Pyrrha said. "Do you want to win the Vytal Festival? Not your father, not General Ironwood, but you? Is that what you want?"
Penny tilted her head first one way and then the other. "I… yes, I think I would," she confessed. "At least, I want to be…" She stopped. "I've never been in a tournament before; what's it like?"
"Intimidating, if you don't like crowds," Ruby muttered.
A slight smile crossed Pyrrha's face. "Forget everything that you have learned about combat in the field, because a tournament is nothing like that. This will be my first Vytal Festival too, and I can't speak for the team rounds, but when it gets to the one-on-one rounds… when it's just you and your opponent, facing each other across the circle, that is combat at its purest essence. No reinforcements, no tricks, no surprises: just you and your opponent matching the skills that you've honed and refined against each other. Of course, it goes the other way as well: competing in tournaments isn't always the best preparation for going out and confronting monsters, but when you find yourself in the arena, that little space becomes the whole world to you, that crowd that you can hear cheering you on become all the people in the world, and when you win and throw down your opponent, the exhilaration…" She sighed. "For a long time, I thought that was the greatest feeling in the world."
"Did you find something better?" Penny asked.
"Yes," Pyrrha said softly, glancing at Jaune as she thought of the sensation of his kisses, so clumsy but at the same time so wonderfully full of feeling. That made her blush, and she decided that she didn't necessarily want Penny to ask her about it. "But, uh, even so," she continued with a slightly forced laugh, "it's still a great feeling, to triumph in that space like that."
"It sounds incredible," Penny said in wonderous longing.
"It is," Pyrrha agreed. She couldn't stifle a sigh before she said, "Actually winning the tournament, on the other hand, is something else altogether. Something rather less pleasant."
Penny frowned. "I don't understand. If winning the matches feels so good, then what's the problem with winning the tournament?"
"Because once you win the tournament, you…" Pyrrha sought the right words to explain it. "You become the property of everyone who watched you win the tournament. They feel as though they know you, even though they don't and never will, and because they feel that way, they feel entitled to your time and to yourself, and all the while, you're prevented from ever getting close enough to really know anyone at all because of your status and everything else that surrounds you. Competition can be exhilarating if you feel that way, but victory… there are times when I'm not sure that I would wish the cost of victory on anyone."
"I… aren't your teammates close to you?"
"Yes!" Pyrrha said quickly, before Ruby or Jaune could respond. "Of course they are, and they know it too, but… I had to almost retire from the tournament circuit and come to Beacon in order to have a chance at a normal life. I don't know. Perhaps my own experience isn't universal. I wouldn't want you to think that I was trying to put you off. You should do what you think is best, what you want."
"Hmm," Penny mused. "I… when you describe what it feels like to win in a tournament, it sounds like all I've ever dreamed, except that none of my dreams ever meant that I'd have to say goodbye to my friends. So I suppose… I don't really know what I want."
"I see," Pyrrha murmured. "Penny, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?"
"Sure," Penny said. "Go right ahead."
"How old are you?"
Penny smiled. "I am eleven months and fifteen days old."
"Really?" Jaune explained. "That… that's really young!"
"So?" Ruby asked. "Even if Penny's young, she's old enough to understand what she's doing and old enough to fight."
"I suppose," Pyrrha murmured, feeling ever so slightly appalled at the idea that this mere child – she was aware that there were many who wouldn't consider her a child, but this was surely something else altogether – being placed into such danger. But, on the other hand, if Penny didn't mind, then who was she to judge either her circumstances or those closer to her than Pyrrha herself who had placed her in this situation? She mastered her feelings of mild disgust and kept them off her face. "In that case, perhaps it isn't so surprising that you haven't figured out exactly what you want yet."
"I do have a lot to learn," Penny acknowledged. "I think that's a reason General Ironwood wants me to enter the tournament. I've studied great fighters like you, but by competing against the best in Remnant, I'll learn so much more about different ways of fighting."
"You flatter me, Penny," Pyrrha said lightly. And then, because she didn't want to experience any more flattery, she continued, "But do you want to fight in the tournament? Do you enjoy fighting?"
"Not against the grimm," Penny admitted, "but sparring can be fun. I'd like to at least try this Vytal Tournament, if only to see what it's like. And besides, I'm not sure how my father or General Ironwood would take it if I told them that I didn't want to do it now."
"If they care for you and have your best interests at heart, then I'm sure that they would accept any decision that you make," Pyrrha said, albeit with a touch more hope than any knowledge born out of experience. "As I said, I'd hate to discourage you from something that you want to try. In any case, Penny, perhaps you'd allow me to give you some advice if you wish to fight, in the arena or in battle."
"Of course," Penny said. "I'd welcome any help that someone as great as you could give me."
"You really don't have to flatter me like this."
"I'm not," Penny said. "As part of my initial training, I watched footage of all of your fights alongside other elite fighters. You're amazing! I can't wait until we get to meet in the tournament and I can see how I stack up against you. I know that my father is looking forward to that as well."
"Is he?" Pyrrha murmured. Hearing that, Mother would probably disapprove of what I'm about to do. So might Sunset, for that matter. "From what I've seen of you in action, you share a common fault with Ruby in that you rely very heavily upon your weapons."
"Doesn't every huntsman rely on their weapons?" Jaune asked.
"To an extent," Pyrrha conceded, "but Ruby wouldn't know what to do without hers, would you, Ruby?"
Ruby pouted. "No," she muttered aggrievedly. "Yang tried to teach me how to throw a punch before the year started, but I never got the point of it."
"The point is that you might be disarmed," Pyrrha said.
"You never taught me how to throw a punch," Jaune pointed out.
"I… thought that perhaps you should concentrate on mastering your weapons first," Pyrrha told him.
"Ah," Jaune replied. "Yeah, that makes sense."
"But, in general, I think it's best if you have some idea of what to do if you found yourself without your weapons or in a situation where you could make best use of them," Pyrrha continued. "If I were you, Penny, I should ask Rainbow Dash to teach you how to fight hand to hand."
Penny's eyes were wide. "You really are amazing."
"Hardly," Pyrrha said. "This is very rudimentary. Have you found your semblance yet?"
Penny shook her head. "My father isn't sure that I have one."
"If you have aura, then you have a semblance," Pyrrha said, "and you can unlock it, with proper training." If she could unlock it, then, depending on what her semblance was, it would be another way for Penny to protect herself or engage her opponents without having to rely solely upon her ability to direct her swords.
Penny nodded. "I will. I'll keep trying. Thank you, Pyrrha."
"There's nothing to thank me for," Pyrrha said. She paused. "Would you care to join us? Jaune was just about to play something."
Penny clasped her hands together. "Oh, that would be wonderful!"
"Don't say that until you've actually heard me play," Jaune said. "But, uh, I'll do my best." He picked up his guitar, and the car began to fill with music as he strummed on the strings.
XxXxX
"Sunset?"
Sunset glanced at Ruby out of the corner of her eyes. The sun had broken on the new day, and the two of them found themselves alone. Jaune and Pyrrha were sparring; the Atlesians, Sun, and Blake were… Sunset couldn't have said exactly where they all were, but the point is that they weren't here, and Sunset and Ruby were here – here being the 'living' car with its crates of guns and ammo – and nobody else was.
This wasn't a position which Sunset found wholly disagreeable, depending on what, precisely, Ruby wanted.
"Yes, Ruby?" she replied. "Is there something I can help you with?"
"I don't know, maybe," Ruby replied. "I wanted to ask you something about what you said last night. Or… what you didn't say?"
Sunset frowned. She had an unfortunate idea of where this might be going, but because it was unfortunate, she didn't want to preempt it going anywhere if she could help it. "You might have to forgive me; I don't always remember the things that I didn't say."
Ruby looked as if she didn't entirely believe Sunset on that point, and she might even be right to look that way. "When I said that my mother wasn't famous, that she didn't win any fame for being a great huntress or a… a silver-eyed warrior," she hissed the name, "you were going to say something. But you didn't."
"It wasn't the time or the place."
"Is now the time or the place?"
Sunset snorted. "It's as close to both as it will ever get, I suppose," she said. "I was going to ask… then what's the point? Your mother, your father, their team. They were great you say, and I believe you. They were good at what they did, very good, and yet… what? What was it all for? I… I didn't want to say it but if there is neither fame nor glory at the end of this, then what's the point? I… I don't want to die, but I'd be willing to do it if I knew that my memory would linger evergreen and immortal in the hearts of men. For it is in passing that we achieve immortality, like Pyrrha said." She fell silent for a moment, and her frown deepened. "But if there is no immortality, if in death, the ashes of our memory will be blown away, cast to the winds and forgotten by all but a few of us then… then what's the point?"
That is not my destiny. That is not what I've fought and kicked and struggled for. That is not my fate. I am not made for passing mortal life but for things grander by far. I was made to ascend to greatness. A forgotten death is not my end.
So Sunset hoped. So Sunset devoutly hoped. But she could not believe with absolute certainty. Ruby's words, they… Ruby had not meant to gnaw at her insides, but she had. Ruby's mother had been a great huntress, possessed of a magical power of immense… power. Yet she had perished in uncertain circumstances, and only her family remembered her.
Would that be her fate also? Would that be the fate that they all shared?
Forbid it, destiny.
"The people that she saved are still alive," Ruby said. "I think that's the point."
"Yeah, but…" Sunset hesitated, because this was the bit that had the highest likelihood of coming out wrong, but equally, Sunset didn't see how she could avoid saying it. Her mouth twisted awkwardly.
"Sunset?" Ruby asked.
"I don't want to say it," Sunset said. "It will seem too cruel."
Ruby hesitated. "I… I want to hear it. I want to hear what you have to say."
"Do you?" Sunset said. "Do you really?"
"I do," Ruby said resolutely. "Whatever it is, I want to hear it."
Sunset hesitated for a moment. "Your mother was loved, I have no doubt, but… would you rather have all those that she saved yet saved, or would you rather have your mother alive to tuck you in at night and read you bedtime stories and take care of you when you were sick?"
Ruby hesitated. She glanced at her booted feet. She drew her rifle from behind her back and ran one hand down the crimson barrel. It was as if… she looked ashamed of herself for some reason that Sunset couldn't fathom. Eventually, the words came, but even then, they came slowly, haltingly, as if she was forcing every word past some obstruction in her throat. "I… I don't know. There are times when I think about what my mom did, going on missions like she did, and I get so angry. I ask myself why she couldn't have quit hunting grimm and started teaching like my Dad did. I think about what it did to Dad when she was gone, I think about what Yang had to do to take care of me, and I get so angry because I wonder if she even cared about us. There are times when I ask myself the same question that you just asked me, and I ask myself… if she really loved us, then why didn't she stay with us?
"But then… then I remember how kind she was, the way that she smiled, the sound of her voice when she sang me to sleep. I… I don't remember very much about my mom, but I remember that she was a good person, and that's what… that's what everyone tells me about her, and that's what her diary tells me about her too. And so… so I have to ask myself if she had stayed, if she hadn't fought for what she believed in, then… would she have been the same person that I remember? The person that we all loved."
Sunset looked down upon her younger, smaller teammate and the shamefaced look upon her face. "That… that was hard for you to say, wasn't it?"
Ruby closed her eyes and nodded. "I… I think… I think you're the only person that I could say this to. I couldn't tell Dad or Yang or even Uncle Qrow; they all want… I think they need me to be…"
"The good girl," Sunset finished for her. "The girl who smiles and never gives up and keeps everyone else's spirits up the one who never lets anything get to them or get them down."
"They're not wrong!" Ruby said. "I am that person. Most of the time. But there are times when… I don't know, I just couldn't tell them that I sometimes need stuff like that."
"Maybe not, but that doesn't mean that you have to be ashamed about it," Sunset said. "The truth is, if your mom was alive, you'd probably be a lot angrier with her than you are now. There's no shame in it; it's… I think it's pretty natural to rage against our moms."
"Even… even when they're… not around?"
"That just gives us different things to be mad at them for," Sunset muttered. She shook her head, "Listen, Ruby… just because your family all want you to be something doesn't mean that you have to be what they want. Our parents… sometimes, they want things from us that we can't give to them, and that's not our fault. You can't give and give and give of yourself, because in the end, there's nothing left."
"Even if it hurts them?"
"Even if it did, nobody's worth sacrificing your own self for," Sunset declared. "Nobody. If you can't be you, if you let other people's expectations or desires reshape you, if you let the world bend you to its will, then you've lost, and you'll never amount to a damn thing. You have to be yourself, you have to have your pride no matter what they think, no matter what it costs you… because the cost of surrendering yourself is always greater."
"You'd sacrifice your life but not yourself?"
"I'd give my life for you, for Pyrrha, for Jaune," Sunset said. "Maybe for Blake, as strange as that might sound. But I wouldn't become a completely different person just because you asked me to."
Ruby looked pensive, but whatever else she might have said or not said was interrupted by the sudden jarring shaking of the whole train which knocked Ruby to her knees and forced Sunset to grab the side of the compartment to avoid being thrown out the open doorway.
The train began to slow to a complete stop.
"What's going on?" Ruby asked, looking up at Sunset. "Do you think-?"
"Yeah," Sunset said as she helped Ruby to her feet. "I think this is what we came here for."