"Urrgh" You wake up with a splitting headache.
That's not strange, you do distinctly remember...
That's not strange, you do distinctly remember...
Ork Kwest: In Search Of WAAAAAAGH!
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User Total Gideon020 15
WAKE UP YA GIT!
Gideon020
Really in the mood for ribs.
"Urrgh" You wake up with a splitting headache.
That's not strange, you do distinctly remember getting absolutely hammered on some Brewboy'z new batch of Squig Blood Vodka, before starting a fight that got interrupted by Da Warboss announcing that you and the rest of the ladz were going to start a big krumping scrap on some humie world.
So you piled into the rok with your weapons, and your lucky 'Jurnul' that you took off some flash humie a few years back, along with your faithful Choppa. Every ork was singing, drinking, brawling, and generally having a merry time.
And then things got weird, even weirder than when that Weirdboy got drunk and started flying around on his own flaming farts.
The last thing you remember was the Rok shaking, things exploding, and then a girder swinging at your face.
Which brings you back to the present. You are an Ork, and you are hanging upside down from some wiring inside the Rok that should have brought you to a decent fight. The place is empty, the other ladz must have thought you were dead, but you also can't hear the sounds of fighting, which means the fight must be pretty zogging far by now.
Struggling, you manage to rip some wires loose and drop to the ground with a thump. Rubbing your head, you look around for your kit and other stuff. Those gitz had better not have stolen all your stuff.
[]Wot's yer name?
[]Wot's yer Clan?
[]Waddya do?
That's not strange, you do distinctly remember getting absolutely hammered on some Brewboy'z new batch of Squig Blood Vodka, before starting a fight that got interrupted by Da Warboss announcing that you and the rest of the ladz were going to start a big krumping scrap on some humie world.
So you piled into the rok with your weapons, and your lucky 'Jurnul' that you took off some flash humie a few years back, along with your faithful Choppa. Every ork was singing, drinking, brawling, and generally having a merry time.
And then things got weird, even weirder than when that Weirdboy got drunk and started flying around on his own flaming farts.
The last thing you remember was the Rok shaking, things exploding, and then a girder swinging at your face.
Which brings you back to the present. You are an Ork, and you are hanging upside down from some wiring inside the Rok that should have brought you to a decent fight. The place is empty, the other ladz must have thought you were dead, but you also can't hear the sounds of fighting, which means the fight must be pretty zogging far by now.
Struggling, you manage to rip some wires loose and drop to the ground with a thump. Rubbing your head, you look around for your kit and other stuff. Those gitz had better not have stolen all your stuff.
[]Wot's yer name?
[]Wot's yer Clan?
-Snakebites (Feral Rage, can only be a Choppa Boy or Choppa Nob)
-Bad Moons (Too lazy to be a Choppa Boy or Choppa Nob, start with Flash Kit)
-Goffs (No Shooting! Melee Only!)
-Evil Sunz (Start with a Free Bike, Free Trukk OR a Free Fighta!)
-Deffskullz (Sneaky Git)
-Blood Axes (Talky Git)
-Freeboota (Nice Hat)
-Bad Moons (Too lazy to be a Choppa Boy or Choppa Nob, start with Flash Kit)
-Goffs (No Shooting! Melee Only!)
-Evil Sunz (Start with a Free Bike, Free Trukk OR a Free Fighta!)
-Deffskullz (Sneaky Git)
-Blood Axes (Talky Git)
-Freeboota (Nice Hat)
-Choppa Boy
-Shoota Boy
-Burna Boy
-TankBusta
-Speed Kultist
-Flyboy
-Kommando
-Flash Git
-Loota
-Mek
-Doc Boy
-Nob
-Shoota Boy
-Burna Boy
-TankBusta
-Speed Kultist
-Flyboy
-Kommando
-Flash Git
-Loota
-Mek
-Doc Boy
-Nob
Outta da rok, ya lazy git!
Gideon020
Really in the mood for ribs.
[X] Shakteef
[X] Freeboota
[X] Mek
Oh, right, your name is Shakteef, the stressing is important that, and you're a Freeboota Mek who joined up with WAAAAGH Redsnozz (you allow yourself to snigger now that Warboss Redsnozz wasn't in earshot) to help that lousy git maintain his vehicles. Stupid Goff git was infamous among Orkz, because the only thing faster than a slugga bullet was Orkish gossip, for how notoriously cheap he was with his teef.
You look down at yourself and with a roar express your dismay, "YOU LOUSY GITS! STEAL MY KIT WILL YA! i'LL HAVE YER GUTZ FOR DIS! YA COULDN'T WAKE ME UP FOR THE FIGHT? WHEN I FIND YA, YA GONNA HAVE A RED SNOZZ FER REAL YA CHEAP GIT! WHEN I'M DONE WIF YA, GORK AND MORK WILL BE USIN' YA FOR SQUIG BALL!"
Calming down from that cathartic rant, you start looking around for some kind of kit, kicking dead Grots and Snotling out of the way before you find a dropped Choppa, probably left behind in the rush to leave the Rok. Picking it up you slide it into one of your many holsters and continue heading down the corridors of the Rok.
Checking your pack as you walk, you breath a sigh of relief at finding your Lucky Jurnal is still there, if that had been stolen you'd have gone on a rampage until you got it back, but you scribble a note in your jurnal as you keep searching the Rok and the bodies scattered about for any kit that you can use.
But what brings a smile to your face is when you find a large box marked with your own personal glyph, "Me kit! Come to Shakteef ya big wonderful box o' gubbins!" Grabbing the large box and strapping it to your body, you feel like a proper Mek again as you also find something else underneath, a dropped kap with a set of glaring eyes sewn in with metal teef along the brow, probably supposed to look intimidating when the owner was asleep, and fool the dumber grots.
Meh, it's a nice hat, and in traditional Freeboota fashion you take it for yourself. Why not? It's a nice kap and no-one else is using it.
Even so, you don't feel Orky enough, and you know why, ya don't have any Dakka and that's a problem. So you continue searching, hoping you don't have to swallow your pride, and maybe your tongue, at having to pick up one of those useless Grot Blastas, because you just know some git is going to find out and you'll be laughed at by every Ork in the universe for doing that.
FINDIN' STUFF ROLL:
But Gork and Mork must've been smiling at you, or took pity on you, no real diff' and gave ya something you could work with. A dead Flash Git was lyin' slumped against the rocky wall of the Rok while clutching onto his Big Dakka Blasta with a death grip and you smiled at seeing a still-full box o' ammo on his back as you take out your tools and get to work.
"Ya did good keeping a hold of yer gear, but dis Mek needs it more den ya. So give it over." You manage to remove the weapon and ammo box before taking a moment to start reworking the weapon to be more portable.
You take apart the large frame, shunt several parts around and after a few hours you build the weapon into a rifle-style Big Dakka Shoota with the Ammo Box on your back feeding a long belt of ammo into the weapon and you feel much better about your chances now that you have a nice bit of Dakka in your hands.
"Roight, time to find out where da zog am I." Hefting your Big Dakka Shoota by a strap made from the remnants of the Flash Git's clothes and Dakka Blasta, you stride towards where you think is an entrance to the Rok, finding light at the end of a tunnel where the lights had failed, probably because the tunnel was all cracked and broken up, but still navigable as you shove aside a few girders and rocks to finally emerge into the light, blinking as your vision clears...
...Wot the zog?
[]Where'd dis desert come from? You were headin' fer water!
[]Okay, dat castle is new. Where's da jungle dis Rok was headin' to?
[]Zoggin' Heck it's cold! Last ya checked, deserts ain't supposed to be cold and snowy!
[]Dis is a lot of jungle. Don't humie hive worlds have no jungles?
[]Oh, da Rok crashed in a city. Fine, but YA WAS SUPPOSED TA HIT A SPACE HULK!
[]Uh, dis is...(Yes, this is the write-in option.)
[X] Freeboota
[X] Mek
Oh, right, your name is Shakteef, the stressing is important that, and you're a Freeboota Mek who joined up with WAAAAGH Redsnozz (you allow yourself to snigger now that Warboss Redsnozz wasn't in earshot) to help that lousy git maintain his vehicles. Stupid Goff git was infamous among Orkz, because the only thing faster than a slugga bullet was Orkish gossip, for how notoriously cheap he was with his teef.
You look down at yourself and with a roar express your dismay, "YOU LOUSY GITS! STEAL MY KIT WILL YA! i'LL HAVE YER GUTZ FOR DIS! YA COULDN'T WAKE ME UP FOR THE FIGHT? WHEN I FIND YA, YA GONNA HAVE A RED SNOZZ FER REAL YA CHEAP GIT! WHEN I'M DONE WIF YA, GORK AND MORK WILL BE USIN' YA FOR SQUIG BALL!"
Calming down from that cathartic rant, you start looking around for some kind of kit, kicking dead Grots and Snotling out of the way before you find a dropped Choppa, probably left behind in the rush to leave the Rok. Picking it up you slide it into one of your many holsters and continue heading down the corridors of the Rok.
Checking your pack as you walk, you breath a sigh of relief at finding your Lucky Jurnal is still there, if that had been stolen you'd have gone on a rampage until you got it back, but you scribble a note in your jurnal as you keep searching the Rok and the bodies scattered about for any kit that you can use.
But what brings a smile to your face is when you find a large box marked with your own personal glyph, "Me kit! Come to Shakteef ya big wonderful box o' gubbins!" Grabbing the large box and strapping it to your body, you feel like a proper Mek again as you also find something else underneath, a dropped kap with a set of glaring eyes sewn in with metal teef along the brow, probably supposed to look intimidating when the owner was asleep, and fool the dumber grots.
Meh, it's a nice hat, and in traditional Freeboota fashion you take it for yourself. Why not? It's a nice kap and no-one else is using it.
Even so, you don't feel Orky enough, and you know why, ya don't have any Dakka and that's a problem. So you continue searching, hoping you don't have to swallow your pride, and maybe your tongue, at having to pick up one of those useless Grot Blastas, because you just know some git is going to find out and you'll be laughed at by every Ork in the universe for doing that.
FINDIN' STUFF ROLL:
But Gork and Mork must've been smiling at you, or took pity on you, no real diff' and gave ya something you could work with. A dead Flash Git was lyin' slumped against the rocky wall of the Rok while clutching onto his Big Dakka Blasta with a death grip and you smiled at seeing a still-full box o' ammo on his back as you take out your tools and get to work.
"Ya did good keeping a hold of yer gear, but dis Mek needs it more den ya. So give it over." You manage to remove the weapon and ammo box before taking a moment to start reworking the weapon to be more portable.
You take apart the large frame, shunt several parts around and after a few hours you build the weapon into a rifle-style Big Dakka Shoota with the Ammo Box on your back feeding a long belt of ammo into the weapon and you feel much better about your chances now that you have a nice bit of Dakka in your hands.
"Roight, time to find out where da zog am I." Hefting your Big Dakka Shoota by a strap made from the remnants of the Flash Git's clothes and Dakka Blasta, you stride towards where you think is an entrance to the Rok, finding light at the end of a tunnel where the lights had failed, probably because the tunnel was all cracked and broken up, but still navigable as you shove aside a few girders and rocks to finally emerge into the light, blinking as your vision clears...
...Wot the zog?
[]Where'd dis desert come from? You were headin' fer water!
[]Okay, dat castle is new. Where's da jungle dis Rok was headin' to?
[]Zoggin' Heck it's cold! Last ya checked, deserts ain't supposed to be cold and snowy!
[]Dis is a lot of jungle. Don't humie hive worlds have no jungles?
[]Oh, da Rok crashed in a city. Fine, but YA WAS SUPPOSED TA HIT A SPACE HULK!
[]Uh, dis is...(Yes, this is the write-in option.)
Time To Get To Work!
Gideon020
Really in the mood for ribs.
[X]Oh, da Rok crashed in a city. Fine, but YA WAS SUPPOSED TA HIT A SPACE HULK!
Rok Impact Site, Unknown City
"WHAT THE ZOG IS DIS?" Your roar disturbs the scavenging birds picking over the corpses on the ground as you trudged out of the Rok and looked out at the city before you.
Towering structures of stone, crystal and metal reach towards the sky, smoke billowing from more than a few holes in some of them while one tower collapsed as you watched, eliciting a chuckle as the collapsing section landed with an almighty *BANG* that you felt more than you heard as a giant plume of dust flew into the air.
Brief flashes of bright color and the faint *krump* of explosions told you that there was a fight going on, so that had to be where the WAAAGH was. There was only one problem as you stared at the floating bodies being picked over by birds and then at the river that was filling in the gouge carved by the Rok upon landing.
The flashes were coming from across the river, along with the dakka-dakka that was distinctive of Ork guns, but it was fading quickly. Zog it, the WAAAAGH was leaving you behind!
"OI! Bring that WAAAAGH back 'ere ya greedy gits! I wants to have me a right propa skrap!" You holler before looking around for a way to cross the river. You need Skrap and any gubbins you can find to build something to cross the river fast enough that you can reach the fight and get stuck in like a propa Ork! Wading through the rushing, rising tide of muddy water, you grab Ork bodies and find yourself grabbing what look like Eldar bodies, prompting a grunt from you, "Hurr, so the Boyz are givin' the business to a buncha Eldar, dat's a right larf dat."
Well, with some work you can use the gutz for fuel lines and the like, but where the zog was all the skrap?
Oh. There's all the skrap; a big pile of the stuff is just lying on the edge of the skid-mark the Rok made on the city, but it's weird because it looks nothing like any looting done by an Ork. For one thing the loot pile is still there, just stuffed with Skrap to be used! Shaking your head at the strange, unorky behaviour on display here, probably done by some panzee who were too stupid to see the value in good Skrap, so you start gathering everything to start building something.
You scrounge pile, sorting it into Skrap, Tuff Skrap, Sharp Skrap and even some bits of Flash Skrap along with a large bottle of Ork Fightin' Juice that brings a smile to your face, "Ooh, I could use a good drink." Popping the cork on a string you take a good swig of the stuff and let loose a loud belch that releases green gas into the air before it combusts, "Ooh, that went down all burny and tingly. Dat's a propa brew roight dere."
Strapping it to your body in easy reach, you look at the piles of sorted Skrap and an idea on how you can cross the river presents itself, especially as there's a few wheels in the piles as you heft your box o' Mek Toolz and get to work, "Hurr hurr hurr, gonna make me some propa transportation I am. Now I just need to fiddle with dis, and plug in dis, and oooh, I have to weld dat..."
The sounds of fighting soon begin to fade to near inaudibility as you hammer, saw, weld, spit, gut, tan, screw and chew together a kludge between a boat and a bike, being a wheeled vehicle with boat-like bitz like a giant rotating propeller to push it across the ground and across the water, a mounting for your Dakka Shoota with a thick piece of Tuff Skrap to offer just enough protection that you could have a propa fight without dying.
After filling up the fuel tanks and checking to make sure your weapon was secure before you finished fitting the Steery Bitz that was filled with buttons and switches that you don't remember adding but what the heck at least the lights are pretty and flash in funny patterns. Slapping the 'Go' Button and jamming your boot down on the accelerator, the engine roars and the Boat-Buggy is ready for action!
Now you just need to figure out where to go.
Hrmm, the sounds of shooting have faded too much to figure out which way to go, but you spot a few places to check out.
[]Check out the krumped tower, so you can take a gander from high up.
[]Dat big dome building looks Flash, so it must have some Flash loot in it.
[] Wot's on the other side of the Rok? Might be a fight dat way!
[]Hmm, maybe you should tinker a bit with your Boat-Buggy more.
[]Wot's dat noise? Some grot's cryin' up a storm. Hurr hurr, you could use some entertainment.
[]Hrmmm...(Again, write in option.)
Rok Impact Site, Unknown City
"WHAT THE ZOG IS DIS?" Your roar disturbs the scavenging birds picking over the corpses on the ground as you trudged out of the Rok and looked out at the city before you.
Towering structures of stone, crystal and metal reach towards the sky, smoke billowing from more than a few holes in some of them while one tower collapsed as you watched, eliciting a chuckle as the collapsing section landed with an almighty *BANG* that you felt more than you heard as a giant plume of dust flew into the air.
Brief flashes of bright color and the faint *krump* of explosions told you that there was a fight going on, so that had to be where the WAAAGH was. There was only one problem as you stared at the floating bodies being picked over by birds and then at the river that was filling in the gouge carved by the Rok upon landing.
The flashes were coming from across the river, along with the dakka-dakka that was distinctive of Ork guns, but it was fading quickly. Zog it, the WAAAAGH was leaving you behind!
"OI! Bring that WAAAAGH back 'ere ya greedy gits! I wants to have me a right propa skrap!" You holler before looking around for a way to cross the river. You need Skrap and any gubbins you can find to build something to cross the river fast enough that you can reach the fight and get stuck in like a propa Ork! Wading through the rushing, rising tide of muddy water, you grab Ork bodies and find yourself grabbing what look like Eldar bodies, prompting a grunt from you, "Hurr, so the Boyz are givin' the business to a buncha Eldar, dat's a right larf dat."
Well, with some work you can use the gutz for fuel lines and the like, but where the zog was all the skrap?
Oh. There's all the skrap; a big pile of the stuff is just lying on the edge of the skid-mark the Rok made on the city, but it's weird because it looks nothing like any looting done by an Ork. For one thing the loot pile is still there, just stuffed with Skrap to be used! Shaking your head at the strange, unorky behaviour on display here, probably done by some panzee who were too stupid to see the value in good Skrap, so you start gathering everything to start building something.
You scrounge pile, sorting it into Skrap, Tuff Skrap, Sharp Skrap and even some bits of Flash Skrap along with a large bottle of Ork Fightin' Juice that brings a smile to your face, "Ooh, I could use a good drink." Popping the cork on a string you take a good swig of the stuff and let loose a loud belch that releases green gas into the air before it combusts, "Ooh, that went down all burny and tingly. Dat's a propa brew roight dere."
Strapping it to your body in easy reach, you look at the piles of sorted Skrap and an idea on how you can cross the river presents itself, especially as there's a few wheels in the piles as you heft your box o' Mek Toolz and get to work, "Hurr hurr hurr, gonna make me some propa transportation I am. Now I just need to fiddle with dis, and plug in dis, and oooh, I have to weld dat..."
The sounds of fighting soon begin to fade to near inaudibility as you hammer, saw, weld, spit, gut, tan, screw and chew together a kludge between a boat and a bike, being a wheeled vehicle with boat-like bitz like a giant rotating propeller to push it across the ground and across the water, a mounting for your Dakka Shoota with a thick piece of Tuff Skrap to offer just enough protection that you could have a propa fight without dying.
After filling up the fuel tanks and checking to make sure your weapon was secure before you finished fitting the Steery Bitz that was filled with buttons and switches that you don't remember adding but what the heck at least the lights are pretty and flash in funny patterns. Slapping the 'Go' Button and jamming your boot down on the accelerator, the engine roars and the Boat-Buggy is ready for action!
Now you just need to figure out where to go.
Hrmm, the sounds of shooting have faded too much to figure out which way to go, but you spot a few places to check out.
[]Check out the krumped tower, so you can take a gander from high up.
[]Dat big dome building looks Flash, so it must have some Flash loot in it.
[] Wot's on the other side of the Rok? Might be a fight dat way!
[]Hmm, maybe you should tinker a bit with your Boat-Buggy more.
[]Wot's dat noise? Some grot's cryin' up a storm. Hurr hurr, you could use some entertainment.
[]Hrmmm...(Again, write in option.)
Getting started! Part 1
Gideon020
Really in the mood for ribs.
[X]Wot's dat noise? Some grot's cryin' up a storm. Hurr hurr, you could use some entertainment.
You gun the engine and rumble over to some dumb-looking panzee eldar house; you stare at the wood and brick building with a gimlet eye before spitting a gob of saliva on the ground, "Dumb panzees, no honest Ork would build 'iz house outta mud and twigs. Just not propa." Dismounting the Boat-Buggy, you stomp over to the building where that noise was coming from, before giving the door a good kick, sending it crashing down to the ground.
Stomping inside, you look around for the source of the noise, finding it coming from a staircase heading downstairs and with a shrug you trudge down the stairs until you find the source of the noise coming from what looks like a collapsed section of the basement area of the house as you start shoving things aside to see what you could find.
After shoving aside a fallen beam, you come across the source of the crying...to find what looks like some animals busy eating a corpse while giving off cries that sound like someone crying. You snort, catching their attention, and one of them hisses at you.
*DAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKA!*
You look at the ruined, partially collapsed room and the new bullet holes filling it before trudging away from the gore-stains that clearly used to be some kind of scavenger and heading back to the Boat-Buggy, "Wotta waste, didn't even have to hold down the trigga for two sekunds. Wotta waste..."
Slapping your gun back into the mounting and starting the propeller again, taking a moment to look over at the crashed Rok when a thought makes you express your feelings on leaving it behind.
"Feh."
You're an Ork, why the zog would you get torn up about this? You turn away and gun the engine, speeding down the cobblestones on approach to the river, ramping off the edge of the path and landing in the water with a crash, spraying water all over you as the propeller roars and begins pushing your Boat-Buggy across the water.
[X] To Be Continued...
You gun the engine and rumble over to some dumb-looking panzee eldar house; you stare at the wood and brick building with a gimlet eye before spitting a gob of saliva on the ground, "Dumb panzees, no honest Ork would build 'iz house outta mud and twigs. Just not propa." Dismounting the Boat-Buggy, you stomp over to the building where that noise was coming from, before giving the door a good kick, sending it crashing down to the ground.
Stomping inside, you look around for the source of the noise, finding it coming from a staircase heading downstairs and with a shrug you trudge down the stairs until you find the source of the noise coming from what looks like a collapsed section of the basement area of the house as you start shoving things aside to see what you could find.
After shoving aside a fallen beam, you come across the source of the crying...to find what looks like some animals busy eating a corpse while giving off cries that sound like someone crying. You snort, catching their attention, and one of them hisses at you.
*DAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKADAKKA!*
You look at the ruined, partially collapsed room and the new bullet holes filling it before trudging away from the gore-stains that clearly used to be some kind of scavenger and heading back to the Boat-Buggy, "Wotta waste, didn't even have to hold down the trigga for two sekunds. Wotta waste..."
Slapping your gun back into the mounting and starting the propeller again, taking a moment to look over at the crashed Rok when a thought makes you express your feelings on leaving it behind.
"Feh."
You're an Ork, why the zog would you get torn up about this? You turn away and gun the engine, speeding down the cobblestones on approach to the river, ramping off the edge of the path and landing in the water with a crash, spraying water all over you as the propeller roars and begins pushing your Boat-Buggy across the water.
[X] To Be Continued...
Finally, inside the flash dome.
Gideon020
Really in the mood for ribs.
[X]Dat big dome building looks Flash, so it must have some Flash loot in it.
Gunning the engine and roaring off across the water, you look out at the giant dome in the distance and consider how you're going to reach the place. If the Boyz were up to snuff, then they'd have wrecked enough buildings and defenders that you won't be able to navigate past the wreckage because your vehicle is too weedy to even ram past most wreckage.
So you need to find a way to get closer to the dome as you cross the river and hit the riverbank, driving up some stone steps to reach the stone paths, "Hrmm, now which way to go?"
You spot what looks like a large crater gouged out by a Kroozer's gun, or maybe a Weird Boy exploding, that opens into a huge tunnel running underneath the city. Seeing no other accessible paths for you and your Boat-Buggy, you drive the vehicle down the collapsed stone to hit the water flooding the tunnel, before rumbling into the darkness.
Mysterious City, Sewer Tunnel
"Huh, plenty of Grots down 'ere." You mutter as your Boat-Buggy runs down another Grot under the heavy wheels while the spinning propeller clips another and cleaves it into two rough pieces as you rumble down the tunnels and check your bearings based on what parts of the surface you could see.
"Hmph, still on track." You pat your Boat-Buggy affectionately as the vehicle rumbles across the brackish, filthy water in the tunnels while you turn down a tunnel and continue rumbling your way towards that flash dome building until you start to notice that the tunnels were starting to get all fancy and flash-looking, with bits of shiny stuff underneath all the grime, "Feh, just loike a panzee to make da dropz look all fancy."
You continue traveling down the tunnel, feeling confident that you've found the dome building as you spot what looks like some kind of dock that's partially collapsed into the water, giving you an easy access as you ramp up onto the stone floor and take a look at the door.
"Hrmm, solid. Not bad fer Panzees." You turn off your Boat-Buggy and grab your Dakka Shoota, marching over to the heavy wooden door before laying flat on the ground with a good, hard kick before you stomp into the basement area of the flash dome building.
Immediately as you enter, you find yourself at a crossroads; two of the paths go up while one goes down. You don't hear or see anything suspicious right now.
[]Go up the right path.
[]Go up the left path.
[]Go down the central path.
(Yes, you can do a write-in at any time. You're an ork after all.)
Gunning the engine and roaring off across the water, you look out at the giant dome in the distance and consider how you're going to reach the place. If the Boyz were up to snuff, then they'd have wrecked enough buildings and defenders that you won't be able to navigate past the wreckage because your vehicle is too weedy to even ram past most wreckage.
So you need to find a way to get closer to the dome as you cross the river and hit the riverbank, driving up some stone steps to reach the stone paths, "Hrmm, now which way to go?"
You spot what looks like a large crater gouged out by a Kroozer's gun, or maybe a Weird Boy exploding, that opens into a huge tunnel running underneath the city. Seeing no other accessible paths for you and your Boat-Buggy, you drive the vehicle down the collapsed stone to hit the water flooding the tunnel, before rumbling into the darkness.
Mysterious City, Sewer Tunnel
"Huh, plenty of Grots down 'ere." You mutter as your Boat-Buggy runs down another Grot under the heavy wheels while the spinning propeller clips another and cleaves it into two rough pieces as you rumble down the tunnels and check your bearings based on what parts of the surface you could see.
"Hmph, still on track." You pat your Boat-Buggy affectionately as the vehicle rumbles across the brackish, filthy water in the tunnels while you turn down a tunnel and continue rumbling your way towards that flash dome building until you start to notice that the tunnels were starting to get all fancy and flash-looking, with bits of shiny stuff underneath all the grime, "Feh, just loike a panzee to make da dropz look all fancy."
You continue traveling down the tunnel, feeling confident that you've found the dome building as you spot what looks like some kind of dock that's partially collapsed into the water, giving you an easy access as you ramp up onto the stone floor and take a look at the door.
"Hrmm, solid. Not bad fer Panzees." You turn off your Boat-Buggy and grab your Dakka Shoota, marching over to the heavy wooden door before laying flat on the ground with a good, hard kick before you stomp into the basement area of the flash dome building.
Immediately as you enter, you find yourself at a crossroads; two of the paths go up while one goes down. You don't hear or see anything suspicious right now.
[]Go up the right path.
[]Go up the left path.
[]Go down the central path.
(Yes, you can do a write-in at any time. You're an ork after all.)
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Dat was a zogging long climb!
Gideon020
Really in the mood for ribs.
[X] Toss a bullet in the air and go whichever way it ends up pointing. Even if it points a wall.
Tossing a spare bullet into the air and watching it spin, your brow furrows when the bullets and points straight up at the ceiling, prompting you to look up and spot a few bricks that were a different color than the rest that might be a way to head up as you aim your Big Dakka Shoota up at the roof and pull the trigger, the gun roaring like an Ork with a sore toof as pulverised brick and mortar dust fall on top of you before you stop shooting.
As the dust settled, you smile at seeing what looks like a ladder before jumping up to grab it, managing to grab the lowest rung of the steel ladder and pull yourself up to start climbing up into the dark shaft.
"Hurr, hurr, dis'll be easy!" You chuckle as you continue your climb with a wide, toothy grin on your face.
Your grin fades after several long, boring hours climbing up the ladder in the dark, "Aw zog, 'ow long iz dis zoggin' fing supposed to be?" Looking back down the shaft, the light of the bottom long since faded away, "Aaawww, I dun wanna go back down." Grumbling and cursing, you keep climbing up the shaft, "Better be some zogging good loot up here."
As you keep climbing, your head eventually bumps into and dents a hatch. Grinning, you shove it open and climb out into a room.
You look around the room that you arrived at after spending hours climbing...
[]...the place looks fancy, like one o' them humie bunkrooms in a few places you looted.
[]...the place looks like a Weird Boy workshop.
[]...and groan and you find that you're on top of the flash dome and outside again!
[]...and start drooling. FOOD!
Tossing a spare bullet into the air and watching it spin, your brow furrows when the bullets and points straight up at the ceiling, prompting you to look up and spot a few bricks that were a different color than the rest that might be a way to head up as you aim your Big Dakka Shoota up at the roof and pull the trigger, the gun roaring like an Ork with a sore toof as pulverised brick and mortar dust fall on top of you before you stop shooting.
As the dust settled, you smile at seeing what looks like a ladder before jumping up to grab it, managing to grab the lowest rung of the steel ladder and pull yourself up to start climbing up into the dark shaft.
"Hurr, hurr, dis'll be easy!" You chuckle as you continue your climb with a wide, toothy grin on your face.
Your grin fades after several long, boring hours climbing up the ladder in the dark, "Aw zog, 'ow long iz dis zoggin' fing supposed to be?" Looking back down the shaft, the light of the bottom long since faded away, "Aaawww, I dun wanna go back down." Grumbling and cursing, you keep climbing up the shaft, "Better be some zogging good loot up here."
As you keep climbing, your head eventually bumps into and dents a hatch. Grinning, you shove it open and climb out into a room.
You look around the room that you arrived at after spending hours climbing...
[]...the place looks fancy, like one o' them humie bunkrooms in a few places you looted.
[]...the place looks like a Weird Boy workshop.
[]...and groan and you find that you're on top of the flash dome and outside again!
[]...and start drooling. FOOD!
Oi! Who are these Grotz?
Gideon020
Really in the mood for ribs.
[X]...the place looks like a Weird Boy workshop.
You've been inside Weirdboy workshops before; sometimes a Boss wants something special to deal with Chaos gits like their weirdo 'daemon' things which are all sorts of annoying because when you tag 'em good they just vanish and you don't even get any good loot off them, except for that git Bluddflagg, the zogger always manages to get his greedy mitts on something, and the less said about that squig-fer-brains Nailbrainz the better in your esteemed opinion as you take in the sights.
The place is decidedly un-orky but you know these places are usually good for finding Weird Stuff, useful for dealing with any Warpy Gitz and other nasty gubbins like that. You stomp over to a workbench and look at the strange glowing chemicals and metals before looking over the stuffed bookshelves at various books, scrolls and other stuff, before shrugging and stuffing the most important-looking ones into your pack.
Acquired: Various Books, Carved Rocks and Scrolls. [20] (Using these depletes the counter in brackets but grants a bonus to a random stat for that post. Declare as a Write In if you want to read a scroll/book/carved rock for temporary insight, then pray that you get the stat boost you want.)
As you finish stuffing your pack, and feeling a little better now that you've done a bit of proper looting, you consider what to do about the various Weird Stuff that is on the workbench and stuffed into every available space.
[]Loot the Weird Stuff, you can figure out what to make later.
[]Modify your Dakka-Shoota with some of the Weird Stuff.
[]Torch it, a propa Mek and a propa Ork doesn't need the stuff.
[]Use ALL of the Weird Stuff to bash together a flash bit of gubbins for your Boat-Buggy.
(GM: Pick Two. And yes, some options are mutually exclusive. You figure out which ones.)
As you make your decision, you hear the rattle of a key in a lock and whirl around just in time for the door to...thump as muffled sounds indicated somebody or something just tried to forcefully push the door open. A quick glance at the lack of hinges on the inside of the room told you that the dumb gits didn't know to pull the door open.
"Hurr hurr hurr." Your chuckle rumbles deep in your chest as you lean back against a table that creaks dangerously as you listen to more thumps and muffled sounds before finally some smart-boy on the other end must have noticed the hinges and began pushing the door open before a trio of small shapes tumbled inside.
"Ouch!"
"Gah!"
"Oof! Selene, Maria, get off! Your elbows are in my spine!"
"Sorry Alex."
"Sorry."
As the trio get up, untangling from each other, and dust themselves down, one of them finally notices you watching with amusement, "EEK! It's one of the green things from the fallen star!" Fallen star? Musta been the Rok, but what about the Space Hulk? Hrrm, actually, wasn't the Space Hulk supposed to stay in orbit in case the Bugs and the Warp Gitz got loose from Da Killin' Floorz? Hurr, best way to stay in shape, ever.
Oh right, and the Space Hulk was supposed to stay in orbit because Mad Mek Toofeata wanted to try making Deff Dredz and Killa Kans that could be dropped from above. And those Blood Axe gits were working on some kinda special Bomma that could avoid the Lookie-Loo Gitfindaz that the Humies and other gitz used to shoot up the Fly-Boyz.
Some of the crazy gitz wanted to jump out of the Bomma, like one-way Stormboyz. Blood Axes, buncha loonie gitz the lot of 'em, at least you're a Freeboota, none of that zoggin Klan nonsense to muck things up when you want good Skrap and a good Scrap. Hurr, that rhymed.
"HEY! I'm talking to you!" A loud, annoying, voice turns your attention back to the little Humie Grotz that interrupted your Important Thinking, which is doubly important since it helped figure out things like measurements, caliber sizes, angles of attack, and all those other brain-hurty things most other Orks didn't care about.
Not that you cared much either; half the time you just prayed to Mork or Gork, whichever was more appropriate, and held down the trigger.
Still, ya supposed you better not kill the little Grotz, a Mek needs assistants after all, and shift to look down at them properly.
Bah, only thing worse than Humie Grots was Weird Humie Grots. Still, you need to catch up and nothing says a Freeboota can't loot himself some new Grotz, right?
"Whaddya want?" First, let's see just what these mushroom-suckers wanted.
"Hmph, if you were listening before, I was asking you what you were doing inside Master Lugin's personal workshop!" The brown-haired Grot replied like a Boy who wanted to thump someone, but couldn't so all he could do was sulk, "And where is Master Lugin you big green brute!"
You shrug, "Dunno. Just climbed a zoggin' long ladder, found meself here and started lootin' the place." You look around, "Zoggin piss-poor loot though, not even any Shiny Skrap for me kit." You glare at the Grot, "Dere, I answered ya stupid question, so zog off and lemme get back to lootin' in peace."
"Okay, sure!" The nervous-looking yellow-hair Grot piped up, "Let's go girls!"
"Not without the book!" The brown, loud one yelled while you idly picked up a small, furry, squiggly thing from the cage it was sniffing around gormlessly in, studied it intently...
...and then popped it into your mouth and started chewing noisily while you continued rifling for anything shiny. You had an idea for a nice set of 'eadlamps you could put on your hat so ya didn't need a torch or burning Grot, same difference really, to see by. Plus, you could make 'em shoot beams from the eyes on your hat, which would be good for a laugh.
"You really think one of Master Lugin's spell books is going to help us survive the Xanthite soldiers that survived from being overrun...and eaten, by those hordes of green brutes like him?" Huh, that one with the weird hair sounded right sensible. Panzees should have something propa killy, not some fancy Drops-paper all covered in scribbles. Hmm, speaking of Drops-paper...you shove some of the tome into your pack just in case nature called on your Ork physi...fizzy...your body.
Smart-Boyz plan for the moments when the fightin's done after all.
"Well it's not like we can just find a Flight Gem and escape from here! They were all taken by the Advanced Students and they're all dead, enslaved, or wishing they were with the other two groups!" Stamping her foot, the brown-hair Grot notices you rifling through shelves and then bold as a newly-sodded pup taking something from a bigger Ork, before they got turned into fungus-sod by a good hard thump, kicked you in your shin, "You! Since you're busy looting our headmaster's workshop, you can help us find what we're looking for!"
"You ain't da Boss o' me, ya little Grot." You growl out, spitting a wad of green-tinged spit at her feet, "Shove off."
"I WILL NOT!" She shouts at you. You idly rate it a 5 on the scale, the highest of course being WAAAAAGH, but no Humie ever got higher than 3 so this one might have some potential as she starts on a tantrum, "YOU ARE GOING TO FIND WHAT WE WANT OTHERWISE WE'LL...WE'LL...WE'LL MAKE YOUR LIFE MISERABLE! I KNOW HOW LIGHT THINGS ON FIRE, I CAN JUST BURN YOUR CLOTHES OFF!"
"Den I go loot me some clothes." You snort, "Plenty o' corpses to choose from."
"THEN I'LL TAKE YOUR WEAPONS!"
You drop the Dakka-Shoota at her feet, the weapon making a nice, big set of cracks on the stone floor, "If'n ya can even lift it ya weedy little panzee."
Her face goes a very nice shade of red.
"FIND THE FUCKING BOOK YOU STUPID GREEN IDIOT!"
Right, this was getting annoying. You spin around and backhand the little Grot on the face, hard, a propa Ork Growl coming up from your belly, "Listen ya dumb little lump of squig-shit, I'm bigger dan ya, 'arder den ya, and if'n it took my fancy, you'd be all carved up and ready for me to roast and eat later." You lean in, glaring menacingly into her eyes, "And if ya bother me with more of ya zoggin' shoutin' den I'm liable to get upset and when dat happens, fings die. Slowly."
You decide you might as bribe her to go away and grab...
[]A small, white-coloured book. (Ariel's Tome of Light. VERY Child-safe Edition for ages under 15. Original was very misleading and that's all I'm going to say. The size of an average hardback novel.)
[]Some big, red-looking tome as big as her head. (Morian's Very Big Book of Burning Spells, Political Lectures and other Incendiary Topics. CCXXIX Edition Printing with original Pre-Censoring Theory That All Elves are In-Bred Retards Because They Refused My Leadership. It's the size of a child's head.)
[]A MASSIVE green and properly 'ard-looking brick of a book all covered in metal bitz and even a propa thick lock and chain keeping it shut. (The Bible of Damnation. Original Pre-Diablex Heresy Crusade Printing with intact Prayer-Rituals of Desecration and Ruin including the original Devouring Corruption Of Magic. It's also MUCH larger than a small child and heavy enough to crush one but comes with its own levitation charm for those mages who want to look impressive as they reduced armies to a state comparable to molten plastic.)
(GM: Only one can be picked ladies and gents.)
And proceed to thump it down at her feet before picking up your Shoota, "Ere, take this and zog off. Otherwise, I'm eating ya." Too bad you lost your Eatin' Squigs and that nice set of Secret Mushrooms, Spices, Herbs, and Crunchy Squigglies you painstakingly collected.
An Ork's gotta have hobbies to keep the boredom away when there's no-one to fight and you're lost in the bowels of a Space Hulk.
Besides, you're quite proud of the hungry, jealous looks you always got when you were done roasting. You look around the benches and work-tables and find another furry squiggly and without any preamble remove it from the cage and pop it in your mouth. Mmm, tastes like Mushroom Beer-Batter Chips.
"Um, Master Angry Green Thing?" You growl in annoyance at the interruption for your appreciation of fine exotic snacks and glare at the quivering yellow-hair Grot, who managed to rally enough to squeak out, "U-um, maybe you could...help us leave the city too? Please? We can pay you."
The silver-hair pinched the brown-hair in view of you but said nothing as the yellow-hair pulled out some pieces of Shiny Skrap, the little kind that Humies always seem to love carrying around, almost as bad as those Gorkamorka mob with their Janglies.
Still, you're a Mek, and a Mek needs Grotz to do the scut work...
[]Nah, ya can trust actual Grotz to get the job done, not some Humie panzees. Help 'em get out and them dump 'em somewhere.
[]Hrmm, why not? Ya can toughen 'em up, make 'em...well not Orks but Orky enough to count. Press-gang 'em into joining the WAAAAAAGH!
[]Zog it, just shoot them all and finish looting. Maybe eat 'em later if there's any bits big enough for a propa feed.
[]Zog it, just ignore then and finish looting. Besides, Humies start to stink something fierce unlike a good Orky smell like you got.
You've been inside Weirdboy workshops before; sometimes a Boss wants something special to deal with Chaos gits like their weirdo 'daemon' things which are all sorts of annoying because when you tag 'em good they just vanish and you don't even get any good loot off them, except for that git Bluddflagg, the zogger always manages to get his greedy mitts on something, and the less said about that squig-fer-brains Nailbrainz the better in your esteemed opinion as you take in the sights.
The place is decidedly un-orky but you know these places are usually good for finding Weird Stuff, useful for dealing with any Warpy Gitz and other nasty gubbins like that. You stomp over to a workbench and look at the strange glowing chemicals and metals before looking over the stuffed bookshelves at various books, scrolls and other stuff, before shrugging and stuffing the most important-looking ones into your pack.
Acquired: Various Books, Carved Rocks and Scrolls. [20] (Using these depletes the counter in brackets but grants a bonus to a random stat for that post. Declare as a Write In if you want to read a scroll/book/carved rock for temporary insight, then pray that you get the stat boost you want.)
As you finish stuffing your pack, and feeling a little better now that you've done a bit of proper looting, you consider what to do about the various Weird Stuff that is on the workbench and stuffed into every available space.
[]Loot the Weird Stuff, you can figure out what to make later.
[]Modify your Dakka-Shoota with some of the Weird Stuff.
[]Torch it, a propa Mek and a propa Ork doesn't need the stuff.
[]Use ALL of the Weird Stuff to bash together a flash bit of gubbins for your Boat-Buggy.
(GM: Pick Two. And yes, some options are mutually exclusive. You figure out which ones.)
As you make your decision, you hear the rattle of a key in a lock and whirl around just in time for the door to...thump as muffled sounds indicated somebody or something just tried to forcefully push the door open. A quick glance at the lack of hinges on the inside of the room told you that the dumb gits didn't know to pull the door open.
"Hurr hurr hurr." Your chuckle rumbles deep in your chest as you lean back against a table that creaks dangerously as you listen to more thumps and muffled sounds before finally some smart-boy on the other end must have noticed the hinges and began pushing the door open before a trio of small shapes tumbled inside.
"Ouch!"
"Gah!"
"Oof! Selene, Maria, get off! Your elbows are in my spine!"
"Sorry Alex."
"Sorry."
As the trio get up, untangling from each other, and dust themselves down, one of them finally notices you watching with amusement, "EEK! It's one of the green things from the fallen star!" Fallen star? Musta been the Rok, but what about the Space Hulk? Hrrm, actually, wasn't the Space Hulk supposed to stay in orbit in case the Bugs and the Warp Gitz got loose from Da Killin' Floorz? Hurr, best way to stay in shape, ever.
Oh right, and the Space Hulk was supposed to stay in orbit because Mad Mek Toofeata wanted to try making Deff Dredz and Killa Kans that could be dropped from above. And those Blood Axe gits were working on some kinda special Bomma that could avoid the Lookie-Loo Gitfindaz that the Humies and other gitz used to shoot up the Fly-Boyz.
Some of the crazy gitz wanted to jump out of the Bomma, like one-way Stormboyz. Blood Axes, buncha loonie gitz the lot of 'em, at least you're a Freeboota, none of that zoggin Klan nonsense to muck things up when you want good Skrap and a good Scrap. Hurr, that rhymed.
"HEY! I'm talking to you!" A loud, annoying, voice turns your attention back to the little Humie Grotz that interrupted your Important Thinking, which is doubly important since it helped figure out things like measurements, caliber sizes, angles of attack, and all those other brain-hurty things most other Orks didn't care about.
Not that you cared much either; half the time you just prayed to Mork or Gork, whichever was more appropriate, and held down the trigger.
Still, ya supposed you better not kill the little Grotz, a Mek needs assistants after all, and shift to look down at them properly.
Bah, only thing worse than Humie Grots was Weird Humie Grots. Still, you need to catch up and nothing says a Freeboota can't loot himself some new Grotz, right?
"Whaddya want?" First, let's see just what these mushroom-suckers wanted.
"Hmph, if you were listening before, I was asking you what you were doing inside Master Lugin's personal workshop!" The brown-haired Grot replied like a Boy who wanted to thump someone, but couldn't so all he could do was sulk, "And where is Master Lugin you big green brute!"
You shrug, "Dunno. Just climbed a zoggin' long ladder, found meself here and started lootin' the place." You look around, "Zoggin piss-poor loot though, not even any Shiny Skrap for me kit." You glare at the Grot, "Dere, I answered ya stupid question, so zog off and lemme get back to lootin' in peace."
"Okay, sure!" The nervous-looking yellow-hair Grot piped up, "Let's go girls!"
"Not without the book!" The brown, loud one yelled while you idly picked up a small, furry, squiggly thing from the cage it was sniffing around gormlessly in, studied it intently...
...and then popped it into your mouth and started chewing noisily while you continued rifling for anything shiny. You had an idea for a nice set of 'eadlamps you could put on your hat so ya didn't need a torch or burning Grot, same difference really, to see by. Plus, you could make 'em shoot beams from the eyes on your hat, which would be good for a laugh.
"You really think one of Master Lugin's spell books is going to help us survive the Xanthite soldiers that survived from being overrun...and eaten, by those hordes of green brutes like him?" Huh, that one with the weird hair sounded right sensible. Panzees should have something propa killy, not some fancy Drops-paper all covered in scribbles. Hmm, speaking of Drops-paper...you shove some of the tome into your pack just in case nature called on your Ork physi...fizzy...your body.
Smart-Boyz plan for the moments when the fightin's done after all.
"Well it's not like we can just find a Flight Gem and escape from here! They were all taken by the Advanced Students and they're all dead, enslaved, or wishing they were with the other two groups!" Stamping her foot, the brown-hair Grot notices you rifling through shelves and then bold as a newly-sodded pup taking something from a bigger Ork, before they got turned into fungus-sod by a good hard thump, kicked you in your shin, "You! Since you're busy looting our headmaster's workshop, you can help us find what we're looking for!"
"You ain't da Boss o' me, ya little Grot." You growl out, spitting a wad of green-tinged spit at her feet, "Shove off."
"I WILL NOT!" She shouts at you. You idly rate it a 5 on the scale, the highest of course being WAAAAAGH, but no Humie ever got higher than 3 so this one might have some potential as she starts on a tantrum, "YOU ARE GOING TO FIND WHAT WE WANT OTHERWISE WE'LL...WE'LL...WE'LL MAKE YOUR LIFE MISERABLE! I KNOW HOW LIGHT THINGS ON FIRE, I CAN JUST BURN YOUR CLOTHES OFF!"
"Den I go loot me some clothes." You snort, "Plenty o' corpses to choose from."
"THEN I'LL TAKE YOUR WEAPONS!"
You drop the Dakka-Shoota at her feet, the weapon making a nice, big set of cracks on the stone floor, "If'n ya can even lift it ya weedy little panzee."
Her face goes a very nice shade of red.
"FIND THE FUCKING BOOK YOU STUPID GREEN IDIOT!"
Right, this was getting annoying. You spin around and backhand the little Grot on the face, hard, a propa Ork Growl coming up from your belly, "Listen ya dumb little lump of squig-shit, I'm bigger dan ya, 'arder den ya, and if'n it took my fancy, you'd be all carved up and ready for me to roast and eat later." You lean in, glaring menacingly into her eyes, "And if ya bother me with more of ya zoggin' shoutin' den I'm liable to get upset and when dat happens, fings die. Slowly."
You decide you might as bribe her to go away and grab...
[]A small, white-coloured book. (Ariel's Tome of Light. VERY Child-safe Edition for ages under 15. Original was very misleading and that's all I'm going to say. The size of an average hardback novel.)
[]Some big, red-looking tome as big as her head. (Morian's Very Big Book of Burning Spells, Political Lectures and other Incendiary Topics. CCXXIX Edition Printing with original Pre-Censoring Theory That All Elves are In-Bred Retards Because They Refused My Leadership. It's the size of a child's head.)
[]A MASSIVE green and properly 'ard-looking brick of a book all covered in metal bitz and even a propa thick lock and chain keeping it shut. (The Bible of Damnation. Original Pre-Diablex Heresy Crusade Printing with intact Prayer-Rituals of Desecration and Ruin including the original Devouring Corruption Of Magic. It's also MUCH larger than a small child and heavy enough to crush one but comes with its own levitation charm for those mages who want to look impressive as they reduced armies to a state comparable to molten plastic.)
(GM: Only one can be picked ladies and gents.)
And proceed to thump it down at her feet before picking up your Shoota, "Ere, take this and zog off. Otherwise, I'm eating ya." Too bad you lost your Eatin' Squigs and that nice set of Secret Mushrooms, Spices, Herbs, and Crunchy Squigglies you painstakingly collected.
An Ork's gotta have hobbies to keep the boredom away when there's no-one to fight and you're lost in the bowels of a Space Hulk.
Besides, you're quite proud of the hungry, jealous looks you always got when you were done roasting. You look around the benches and work-tables and find another furry squiggly and without any preamble remove it from the cage and pop it in your mouth. Mmm, tastes like Mushroom Beer-Batter Chips.
"Um, Master Angry Green Thing?" You growl in annoyance at the interruption for your appreciation of fine exotic snacks and glare at the quivering yellow-hair Grot, who managed to rally enough to squeak out, "U-um, maybe you could...help us leave the city too? Please? We can pay you."
The silver-hair pinched the brown-hair in view of you but said nothing as the yellow-hair pulled out some pieces of Shiny Skrap, the little kind that Humies always seem to love carrying around, almost as bad as those Gorkamorka mob with their Janglies.
Still, you're a Mek, and a Mek needs Grotz to do the scut work...
[]Nah, ya can trust actual Grotz to get the job done, not some Humie panzees. Help 'em get out and them dump 'em somewhere.
[]Hrmm, why not? Ya can toughen 'em up, make 'em...well not Orks but Orky enough to count. Press-gang 'em into joining the WAAAAAAGH!
[]Zog it, just shoot them all and finish looting. Maybe eat 'em later if there's any bits big enough for a propa feed.
[]Zog it, just ignore then and finish looting. Besides, Humies start to stink something fierce unlike a good Orky smell like you got.
Ooh, dere's gonna be a fight now! Hurrhurrhurr!
Gideon020
Really in the mood for ribs.
[X]Loot the Weird Stuff, you can figure out what to make later.
[X]Modify your Dakka-Shoota with some of the Weird Stuff.
[X]A MASSIVE green and properly 'ard-looking brick of a book all covered in metal bitz and even a propa thick lock and chain keeping it shut.
[X]Hrmm, why not? Ya can toughen 'em up, make 'em...well not Orks but Orky enough to count. Press-gang 'em into joining the WAAAAAAGH!
-[X] Dump some green paint on the shrill one first. She can be da Grot-Boss of da uvva lot.
You grin toothily as snatch up one of the Shiny Bitz and take a closer look at it, "Oi gotz me a better idea." You declare while the brown-hair bossy Grot and the silver-hair smarty Grot watch from the sidelines while that zogging big Humie book started floating near them, "Ya see, I'm sapposed to be wiv me Boyz, krumping any gitz stupid enuff to get in our way. Problem is, the zoggers have gone and buggered off wivout me, includin' me teknickal staff."
Heh, that was a smart-boy thing to say for sure as you look around and find a small, by ork standards, pot of green paint. Not much, but it'll do, "Under normal cirkumstances, you lot would be on your own, but seeing as I have no Grotz to work for me and seein' 'ow da WAAAAAGH has gone and zogged off wivout me, ya'll are gunna tag along. As me personal teknickal staff."
There's dead silence for a moment before the Bossy Grot suddenly says, "What."
Your grin widens as you approach the Bossy Grot and without warning, dip your hand into the paint and daub some bright green splashes across her face, "ACK!" She splutters, spitting out paint that got into her mouth, "WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!"
"To show you're da Boss of these other two." You reply, still grinning, "You work fer me now. Because I'm da biggest and dat means I'm da Boss of you lot." The Bossy Grot and the Wimpy Grot just stare at you, but the Smarty Grot just nods her head, dark eyes lazily looking up at you under silver bangs.
"Makes sense to me. So what do we do Boss?" Hurr, dis is a Smarty Grot, maybe you should have made this one da Grot-Boss instead?
New Party Members: Weird Humie Grotz! Character Profile added to Shakteef's Character Sheet.
"H-Hold on! Why the hell should we be 'tagging along' or 'working' for you! And don't say it's because you're bigger than us!" Bossy Grot shouts and you sigh, you forget that Humies need to be told, several times in fact, just how things worked propa with Orks.
You heft your Dakka-Shoota onto the Workbench and retrieve your tools as you start explaining, "Simple, see? I can either leave ya ta rot here, or ya can make yerselves useful. Plus, I did ya a nice thing by findin' that book fing ya was lookin' fer so it's only fair dat ya work fer me now. Simple."
"But this book isyeeek!" Alex was unable to finish her sentence as Selene pinched her again and whispered into her ear.
"Take the deal Alex. You think our situation is bad now? Think about what will happen to us if we're found with the Bible Of Damnation." She looks over at the green giant busy fiddling with the crystals and other artifacts on Master Lugin's workbench, occasionally stopping to swig something from a large canteen before chuckling and fiddling with his weapon again.
"I don't see why we should take a deal that is likely going to have us enslaved by this brute!" Alex hissed back, the Bible Of Damnation floating ominously behind her as the chain loosened and the lock undid itself so that it opened to allow its new mistresses to read it's heretical pages, and Maria, curious as ever, was sneaking peeks at some of the writings from what Alex could tell, "Besides, we can just say that we found it and saved it from being used by the Xanthites, or the rest of those green things!"
"That would make sense, except that the Bible Of Damnation only starts to float when it's bonded to someone," Selene whispered back, "Besides, I have a feeling that this green monster only cares about fighting, and possibly eating us if we don't make ourselves useful to him. That is a lot better than what a Xanthite would do to a trio of young girls."
Alex shivered, eyes closed and scrunched tightly, before she hissed out, "Fine. But if he tries to sell us to the Xanthites later, then I told you so and I'm going to use the Bible to wipe out everything I can see."
Selene nodded as Maria stared entranced at a ritual for strengthening the body through cannibalism, "We don't have to trust him Alex, just give him some rope to hang himself with."
Alex nodded tightly before turning and approaching the giant as he started finishing up, "Fine. We agree."
"Hurr," the giant laughed, "Ya say dat like you 'ad a choice." Alex's eyes widened as the green brute turned around.
Dakka-Shoota Upgrade Created: Weird Gubbinz Ammo Charga
Increases Damage by 2d12, allows the Dakka Shoota to affect Warpy Fingz, grants Armour-Piercing(20%)!
You look down with pride at the glowing crystal and metal bits that now made up a muzzle-brake for your Dakka-Shoota while answering the Bossy Grot, "Ya had no choice. I woulda taken ya wiv me anyway. Need Grotz to do the squig-werk while I make all sorts of killy gubbinz."
Hrmm, you think that your weapon needs a properly Orky name now that it's a bit special and flash.
[]Write In: Name the Dakka-Shoota! Bonuses for propa Orky names!
"Grraaagh...Fine! So what do we do...Boss." Bossy Grot spits like a Squig with a sore toof and you consider what you should be doing. You need to catch up with the WAAAGH, but the fighting would have long moved away by now so that mean you'd have to follow the trail of destruction out of the city. Still strange that the WAAAAGH avoided this flash place however but you ignore that in favour of moving your looting into other rooms since you need the supplies.
"Roight. Let's go lootin' dis place and no laggin' behind! I see anyone bein' lazy and they'll get a kick from me! I don't put up with lazy Grotz!" You shout as you splash some Fightin' Juice over the useless workbench, and then dump a candle on the bubbling mess, causing to burst into green-tinged flames, "Get a move on!"
Driving the Grotz in front of you with a few good pokes from yer newly-named Dakka-Shoota, you begin leading them through the fine art of lootin' a place bare of anything useful as you find large sacks and shove them into the Grotz hands, "Roight. Da first thing about lootin' is dat ya got to be sure that what yer takin' is gonna be useful. 'Ere, I'll show ya."
You walk up to a suit of armour and knock on it, "Dis is good, because ya make dis into other stuff." You tear it apart and shove it into your pack.
Acquired Tuff Skrap(20)
You pick up a sword, "Dis is useful as well." You shove it into the pack.
Acquired Sharp Skrap(5)
"And dis?" You hold up some humie clothing, "Dis can be useful as well. Once ya take it apart." And so you roughly separate the various bits of fabric, discarding the frilly bits while keeping the more colourful bits and shoving them into the pack.
Acquired Flash Skrap(6)
"Wait. Are you saying that everything is useful?" Bossy Grot suddenly spoke up in a tone that to other people would indicate a growing realization.
You nod, "Yup. I'm a Mek, dat means I can use anyfing to make anyfing. Just no frills or stuff like dat, Boyz tend ta laugh at ya when ya use stuff like dat."
Poor old Big Mek Buttakup, forever cursed to have to use frilly stuff in all his gear because his Warboss thought it was hilarious. Still, that flash cape he fixed onto his own personal Morkanaught was a thing of beauty. You wave your hand out at the various doors in the hallway, "Roight, ya know wot to do, so get a zoggin' move on and bring me back those sacks all stuffed wiv loot!"
The trio of Humie Grotz start running around, opening doors while you go about your business. They'd probably miss some stuff, but that was fine, you'd tear the place apart after they were done to get at the stuff they missed. Kicking open a random door, you found yourself standing in what looked an humie armoury stuffed with hammaz, choppaz and shields and smiled, "Hooo, come to Shakteef me booties."
Between the four of you, you stripped every room you encountered in the quiet, very quiet, corridors over the course of several hours, heading upstairs with each level you cleaned out. Through the windows you could see the sun sinking below the horizon but you were happy since you had a decent haul of stuff as you kicked open another door to find yourself in a bedroom with lit candles surrounding it.
And sleeping on the bed is some kinda Eldar-looking Grot who stirs at the sound of the door being torn off its hinges and crashing to the ground while your trio of Weird Grots gather behind you, Bossy Grot looking pale underneath her green face-paint.
"Ohhh Gods Preserve Us..."
Wimpy Grot looks like she's about to cry while even Smarty Grot looks scared.
"It's not possible...one of them, in the Palace? They never leave the borders of their empire...never!" Smarty Grot mutters as you stomp into the room while the Eldar-looking panzee finally wakes up and yawns, before noticing you looking down at her.
"Ah." She says with wonder in her eyes, reaching up to touch your Dakka-Shoota, prompting you to smile as she stands up on the bed and looks over it like a Boy at the campfire.
"Hurr, not a bad piece of Dakka, eh?" You say and the little panzee looks up at you.
"Dakka! DakkaDakkaDakka!" She laughs which prompts a laugh out of you while the Grotz look confused. You ignore them to test out something else and draw your Choppa.
"Think dat's somefin', check out me Choppa." You show the panzee the Choppa and she laughs.
"Choppa! Chop! Chop! Chop!" She starts moving her hands like she's waving one around and starts laughing as you keep grinning, an idea forming in your head. Eldar are panzee ponces because other Eldar are panzee ponces and therefore don't know how to be hard, right? So if you made this panzee a propa 'ard Orky git, then she could make other Eldar propa 'ard and they would actually put up a decent fight!
Grin growing at your stroke of genius, you shove your choppa back into its sheath and pick up the panzee, "You and me, we're gonna get along just fine, ya lil panzee."
"Panzee!" The Lil Panzee giggled as you dumped her on top of your pack. This shouldn't be too bad, it'll be like raising a wimpy Squig that you need to help get nice and tuff before it can bite anything. And as a Mek there's nothing better than to have a project to work on; why if you can make an Eldar not be a panzee and actually 'ard enough to put up a propa fight? You'll be hailed as a genius to equal the likes of Drek Zog or Orkimedes!
Lil Panzee Acquired! Take good care of her.
"Roight! Did we miss anything?" You ask out loud and Bossy Grot sighs.
"No, you pretty much stripped everything bare." She replies while indicated your bulging pack.
Skrap(500) Acquired.
Sharp Skrap(400) Acquired.
Tuff Skrap (400) Acquired.
Flash Skrap(100) Acquired.
Speshul Dakka Bits(50) Acquired.
Weird Stuff(20) Acquired.
"Good, I don't like leaving good skrap lyin' around where some thievin' magpie can get their grubby mitts on it." You grunt in satisfaction before heading to the door, your new Lil Panzee looking around with clear fascination from her perch behind your head, "Come on, I got a Boat-Buggy parked in some underground tunnel."
Stomping towards the door, you take a swig of Fightin' Juice and then spit it at a candle, starting a blaze that has Lil Panzee clapping happily while your Weird Grotz made way for you like propa Grotz should do. Walking back down the hallways, and back down several floors, you reach the room you had reached from the ladder, now torched and smoldering, before kicking aside some charcoal to reveal the ladder you had climbed up from from, "Down 'ere. Time for us to leave and get back to the WAAAAGH."
You consider the difficulty of the Grotz being on your back while you slid down the ladder and shrug before climbing in, "Get on."
Wimpy Grot blinks, "Get on?"
"Yup, you Grotz are gonna be too slow climbing down this 'ere ladder. So get on me back and hold on tight." The things you do to keep your Grotz intact without any Boyz around. Patiently, which is a miracle in itself, you wait for them to get on your back, grin and say, "Goin' down!"
Ah, nothing like the sound of screaming humies as you slide down a ladder. And Lil Panzee's getting into the Orky spirit if her laughter is something to go by as you slam down onto the stone floor with a satisfying *CRACK* of stone breaking as you unceremoniously lift and dump the three Grotz off your back, Bossy Grot suddenly rubbing her cheek against the stone.
"Aaaaaahhh, solid ground, I will never take you for granted ever again..."
Grotz, they're weird sometimes.
Grunting at them to hurry up, you stomp towards where your Boat-Buggy is parked, kicking down the door leading to it to reveal the Boat-Buggy to the Wierd Grotz and to Lil Panzee.
"Are those...intestines?" Bossy Grot wonders out loud as you clamber aboard and sit down at the steery bitz.
"I think so." Smarty Grot replies, "It reminds me of what the Dwarves would make. Only less ramshackle." Oi! Your Boat-Buggy is a fine piece of Ork engineering! Just because you had to use gutz to finish it doesn't mean it's not Orky! In fact, you're pretty sure it's even more Orky because it has GUTZ!
"Uh...what's that noise?" You turn to cuff Wimpy Grot for ruining your concentration when you hear it, the sound of something rumbling down the tunnel and you turn to see the lights of a huge set of flood-lamps bearing down on your Boat-Buggy before you hear brakes screeching as the approaching object stops in the light.
A hatch opens and a Grot wearing a fancy-looking hat climbs up to glare at you, "OI! Piss off ya lunkhead! Deze 'ere sewers belong to Da Shark!"
"I'll leave when I zogging feel like it! And who in da flaming nuts o' Gork is Da Shark?" You roar back.
The Grot points to the nose of the tank, where a rather well-done Squig Shark face leers menacingly at everything in front of it, prompting a grunt, "Oh."
"Dat's right! So piss off!"
"And what the zog makes you think I'm gonna move?" You fold your arms over your chest.
The gun turrets on the tank all turn and aim at you.
[]Hmm, it might be best to BACK UP LIVELY!
[]You can take this thing, and all that lovely skrap would be better off in your hands!
[]Write In:
[X]Modify your Dakka-Shoota with some of the Weird Stuff.
[X]A MASSIVE green and properly 'ard-looking brick of a book all covered in metal bitz and even a propa thick lock and chain keeping it shut.
[X]Hrmm, why not? Ya can toughen 'em up, make 'em...well not Orks but Orky enough to count. Press-gang 'em into joining the WAAAAAAGH!
-[X] Dump some green paint on the shrill one first. She can be da Grot-Boss of da uvva lot.
You grin toothily as snatch up one of the Shiny Bitz and take a closer look at it, "Oi gotz me a better idea." You declare while the brown-hair bossy Grot and the silver-hair smarty Grot watch from the sidelines while that zogging big Humie book started floating near them, "Ya see, I'm sapposed to be wiv me Boyz, krumping any gitz stupid enuff to get in our way. Problem is, the zoggers have gone and buggered off wivout me, includin' me teknickal staff."
Heh, that was a smart-boy thing to say for sure as you look around and find a small, by ork standards, pot of green paint. Not much, but it'll do, "Under normal cirkumstances, you lot would be on your own, but seeing as I have no Grotz to work for me and seein' 'ow da WAAAAAGH has gone and zogged off wivout me, ya'll are gunna tag along. As me personal teknickal staff."
There's dead silence for a moment before the Bossy Grot suddenly says, "What."
Your grin widens as you approach the Bossy Grot and without warning, dip your hand into the paint and daub some bright green splashes across her face, "ACK!" She splutters, spitting out paint that got into her mouth, "WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!"
"To show you're da Boss of these other two." You reply, still grinning, "You work fer me now. Because I'm da biggest and dat means I'm da Boss of you lot." The Bossy Grot and the Wimpy Grot just stare at you, but the Smarty Grot just nods her head, dark eyes lazily looking up at you under silver bangs.
"Makes sense to me. So what do we do Boss?" Hurr, dis is a Smarty Grot, maybe you should have made this one da Grot-Boss instead?
New Party Members: Weird Humie Grotz! Character Profile added to Shakteef's Character Sheet.
"H-Hold on! Why the hell should we be 'tagging along' or 'working' for you! And don't say it's because you're bigger than us!" Bossy Grot shouts and you sigh, you forget that Humies need to be told, several times in fact, just how things worked propa with Orks.
You heft your Dakka-Shoota onto the Workbench and retrieve your tools as you start explaining, "Simple, see? I can either leave ya ta rot here, or ya can make yerselves useful. Plus, I did ya a nice thing by findin' that book fing ya was lookin' fer so it's only fair dat ya work fer me now. Simple."
"But this book isyeeek!" Alex was unable to finish her sentence as Selene pinched her again and whispered into her ear.
"Take the deal Alex. You think our situation is bad now? Think about what will happen to us if we're found with the Bible Of Damnation." She looks over at the green giant busy fiddling with the crystals and other artifacts on Master Lugin's workbench, occasionally stopping to swig something from a large canteen before chuckling and fiddling with his weapon again.
"I don't see why we should take a deal that is likely going to have us enslaved by this brute!" Alex hissed back, the Bible Of Damnation floating ominously behind her as the chain loosened and the lock undid itself so that it opened to allow its new mistresses to read it's heretical pages, and Maria, curious as ever, was sneaking peeks at some of the writings from what Alex could tell, "Besides, we can just say that we found it and saved it from being used by the Xanthites, or the rest of those green things!"
"That would make sense, except that the Bible Of Damnation only starts to float when it's bonded to someone," Selene whispered back, "Besides, I have a feeling that this green monster only cares about fighting, and possibly eating us if we don't make ourselves useful to him. That is a lot better than what a Xanthite would do to a trio of young girls."
Alex shivered, eyes closed and scrunched tightly, before she hissed out, "Fine. But if he tries to sell us to the Xanthites later, then I told you so and I'm going to use the Bible to wipe out everything I can see."
Selene nodded as Maria stared entranced at a ritual for strengthening the body through cannibalism, "We don't have to trust him Alex, just give him some rope to hang himself with."
Alex nodded tightly before turning and approaching the giant as he started finishing up, "Fine. We agree."
"Hurr," the giant laughed, "Ya say dat like you 'ad a choice." Alex's eyes widened as the green brute turned around.
Dakka-Shoota Upgrade Created: Weird Gubbinz Ammo Charga
Increases Damage by 2d12, allows the Dakka Shoota to affect Warpy Fingz, grants Armour-Piercing(20%)!
You look down with pride at the glowing crystal and metal bits that now made up a muzzle-brake for your Dakka-Shoota while answering the Bossy Grot, "Ya had no choice. I woulda taken ya wiv me anyway. Need Grotz to do the squig-werk while I make all sorts of killy gubbinz."
Hrmm, you think that your weapon needs a properly Orky name now that it's a bit special and flash.
[]Write In: Name the Dakka-Shoota! Bonuses for propa Orky names!
"Grraaagh...Fine! So what do we do...Boss." Bossy Grot spits like a Squig with a sore toof and you consider what you should be doing. You need to catch up with the WAAAGH, but the fighting would have long moved away by now so that mean you'd have to follow the trail of destruction out of the city. Still strange that the WAAAAGH avoided this flash place however but you ignore that in favour of moving your looting into other rooms since you need the supplies.
"Roight. Let's go lootin' dis place and no laggin' behind! I see anyone bein' lazy and they'll get a kick from me! I don't put up with lazy Grotz!" You shout as you splash some Fightin' Juice over the useless workbench, and then dump a candle on the bubbling mess, causing to burst into green-tinged flames, "Get a move on!"
Driving the Grotz in front of you with a few good pokes from yer newly-named Dakka-Shoota, you begin leading them through the fine art of lootin' a place bare of anything useful as you find large sacks and shove them into the Grotz hands, "Roight. Da first thing about lootin' is dat ya got to be sure that what yer takin' is gonna be useful. 'Ere, I'll show ya."
You walk up to a suit of armour and knock on it, "Dis is good, because ya make dis into other stuff." You tear it apart and shove it into your pack.
Acquired Tuff Skrap(20)
You pick up a sword, "Dis is useful as well." You shove it into the pack.
Acquired Sharp Skrap(5)
"And dis?" You hold up some humie clothing, "Dis can be useful as well. Once ya take it apart." And so you roughly separate the various bits of fabric, discarding the frilly bits while keeping the more colourful bits and shoving them into the pack.
Acquired Flash Skrap(6)
"Wait. Are you saying that everything is useful?" Bossy Grot suddenly spoke up in a tone that to other people would indicate a growing realization.
You nod, "Yup. I'm a Mek, dat means I can use anyfing to make anyfing. Just no frills or stuff like dat, Boyz tend ta laugh at ya when ya use stuff like dat."
Poor old Big Mek Buttakup, forever cursed to have to use frilly stuff in all his gear because his Warboss thought it was hilarious. Still, that flash cape he fixed onto his own personal Morkanaught was a thing of beauty. You wave your hand out at the various doors in the hallway, "Roight, ya know wot to do, so get a zoggin' move on and bring me back those sacks all stuffed wiv loot!"
The trio of Humie Grotz start running around, opening doors while you go about your business. They'd probably miss some stuff, but that was fine, you'd tear the place apart after they were done to get at the stuff they missed. Kicking open a random door, you found yourself standing in what looked an humie armoury stuffed with hammaz, choppaz and shields and smiled, "Hooo, come to Shakteef me booties."
Between the four of you, you stripped every room you encountered in the quiet, very quiet, corridors over the course of several hours, heading upstairs with each level you cleaned out. Through the windows you could see the sun sinking below the horizon but you were happy since you had a decent haul of stuff as you kicked open another door to find yourself in a bedroom with lit candles surrounding it.
And sleeping on the bed is some kinda Eldar-looking Grot who stirs at the sound of the door being torn off its hinges and crashing to the ground while your trio of Weird Grots gather behind you, Bossy Grot looking pale underneath her green face-paint.
"Ohhh Gods Preserve Us..."
Wimpy Grot looks like she's about to cry while even Smarty Grot looks scared.
"It's not possible...one of them, in the Palace? They never leave the borders of their empire...never!" Smarty Grot mutters as you stomp into the room while the Eldar-looking panzee finally wakes up and yawns, before noticing you looking down at her.
"Ah." She says with wonder in her eyes, reaching up to touch your Dakka-Shoota, prompting you to smile as she stands up on the bed and looks over it like a Boy at the campfire.
"Hurr, not a bad piece of Dakka, eh?" You say and the little panzee looks up at you.
"Dakka! DakkaDakkaDakka!" She laughs which prompts a laugh out of you while the Grotz look confused. You ignore them to test out something else and draw your Choppa.
"Think dat's somefin', check out me Choppa." You show the panzee the Choppa and she laughs.
"Choppa! Chop! Chop! Chop!" She starts moving her hands like she's waving one around and starts laughing as you keep grinning, an idea forming in your head. Eldar are panzee ponces because other Eldar are panzee ponces and therefore don't know how to be hard, right? So if you made this panzee a propa 'ard Orky git, then she could make other Eldar propa 'ard and they would actually put up a decent fight!
Grin growing at your stroke of genius, you shove your choppa back into its sheath and pick up the panzee, "You and me, we're gonna get along just fine, ya lil panzee."
"Panzee!" The Lil Panzee giggled as you dumped her on top of your pack. This shouldn't be too bad, it'll be like raising a wimpy Squig that you need to help get nice and tuff before it can bite anything. And as a Mek there's nothing better than to have a project to work on; why if you can make an Eldar not be a panzee and actually 'ard enough to put up a propa fight? You'll be hailed as a genius to equal the likes of Drek Zog or Orkimedes!
Lil Panzee Acquired! Take good care of her.
"Roight! Did we miss anything?" You ask out loud and Bossy Grot sighs.
"No, you pretty much stripped everything bare." She replies while indicated your bulging pack.
Skrap(500) Acquired.
Sharp Skrap(400) Acquired.
Tuff Skrap (400) Acquired.
Flash Skrap(100) Acquired.
Speshul Dakka Bits(50) Acquired.
Weird Stuff(20) Acquired.
"Good, I don't like leaving good skrap lyin' around where some thievin' magpie can get their grubby mitts on it." You grunt in satisfaction before heading to the door, your new Lil Panzee looking around with clear fascination from her perch behind your head, "Come on, I got a Boat-Buggy parked in some underground tunnel."
Stomping towards the door, you take a swig of Fightin' Juice and then spit it at a candle, starting a blaze that has Lil Panzee clapping happily while your Weird Grotz made way for you like propa Grotz should do. Walking back down the hallways, and back down several floors, you reach the room you had reached from the ladder, now torched and smoldering, before kicking aside some charcoal to reveal the ladder you had climbed up from from, "Down 'ere. Time for us to leave and get back to the WAAAAGH."
You consider the difficulty of the Grotz being on your back while you slid down the ladder and shrug before climbing in, "Get on."
Wimpy Grot blinks, "Get on?"
"Yup, you Grotz are gonna be too slow climbing down this 'ere ladder. So get on me back and hold on tight." The things you do to keep your Grotz intact without any Boyz around. Patiently, which is a miracle in itself, you wait for them to get on your back, grin and say, "Goin' down!"
Ah, nothing like the sound of screaming humies as you slide down a ladder. And Lil Panzee's getting into the Orky spirit if her laughter is something to go by as you slam down onto the stone floor with a satisfying *CRACK* of stone breaking as you unceremoniously lift and dump the three Grotz off your back, Bossy Grot suddenly rubbing her cheek against the stone.
"Aaaaaahhh, solid ground, I will never take you for granted ever again..."
Grotz, they're weird sometimes.
Grunting at them to hurry up, you stomp towards where your Boat-Buggy is parked, kicking down the door leading to it to reveal the Boat-Buggy to the Wierd Grotz and to Lil Panzee.
"Are those...intestines?" Bossy Grot wonders out loud as you clamber aboard and sit down at the steery bitz.
"I think so." Smarty Grot replies, "It reminds me of what the Dwarves would make. Only less ramshackle." Oi! Your Boat-Buggy is a fine piece of Ork engineering! Just because you had to use gutz to finish it doesn't mean it's not Orky! In fact, you're pretty sure it's even more Orky because it has GUTZ!
"Uh...what's that noise?" You turn to cuff Wimpy Grot for ruining your concentration when you hear it, the sound of something rumbling down the tunnel and you turn to see the lights of a huge set of flood-lamps bearing down on your Boat-Buggy before you hear brakes screeching as the approaching object stops in the light.
A hatch opens and a Grot wearing a fancy-looking hat climbs up to glare at you, "OI! Piss off ya lunkhead! Deze 'ere sewers belong to Da Shark!"
"I'll leave when I zogging feel like it! And who in da flaming nuts o' Gork is Da Shark?" You roar back.
The Grot points to the nose of the tank, where a rather well-done Squig Shark face leers menacingly at everything in front of it, prompting a grunt, "Oh."
"Dat's right! So piss off!"
"And what the zog makes you think I'm gonna move?" You fold your arms over your chest.
The gun turrets on the tank all turn and aim at you.
[]Hmm, it might be best to BACK UP LIVELY!
[]You can take this thing, and all that lovely skrap would be better off in your hands!
[]Write In:
Boss Fight: Da Shark 1
Gideon020
Really in the mood for ribs.
[X]Da Weirdshoota
Bonuses Get!: Bouncy(6), Armour-Destroyer(15), Flashy(20)!
[X]You can take this thing, and all that lovely skrap would be better off in your hands!
Your expert Mek eye takes in Da Shark and you figure out a rough idea of how tough it is.
Da Shark: Grot Mega Tank
Health: 10,000 (It's only the first Boss, even I have to give you a chance. Don't worry, they won't all be so easy as this one.)
Armour: 100% (All damage is reduced by the percentage indicated. Well, not that easy.)
This is gonna be a tough nut ta crack, but you got ya new Wierdshoota and you're itching to have a go at cracking open that Mega Tank so you could put it better use but first ya got to be sneaky and kunnin' to fool these Grotz as you motion for your Grotz to get on the Boat Buggy with a grunted, "Get on, we're leavin'."
Bossy Grot looks curious, "What is that thing? And how in the name of the Light did it get into the sewers?" That was actually a pretty smart question as you shoved her towards the Boat-Buggy, where she took a place with that big book in front of the three while they sat behind your chair and in front of the engine. That tank probably fell into the sewers somewhere and those cowardly grots decided that since they had the dakka, that meant they were in charge of the sewers.
Feh, Grotz, they could never be the boss of anything as you started the Boat-Buggy's engine with a throaty roar of the propellor before you drove into the water and turned the Boat-Buggy to face the Mega Tank, a hunch having you place Lil Panzee in the steery seat where she immediately began playing with the levers and pedals, causing the Boat-Buggy to shift forwards and back in the water while you got into position.
"I only got one fing ta say to youz lot." You rumble menacingly.
"Yeah? Wots dat?" The Grot with the fancy hat shouts back....
Armour-Piercing: 20%
Armour Destroyed: 15
Final Armour: 80%
Final Damage: 2
...and shrieks as you sneakily pull the trigger of Da Wierdshoota, spraying glowing bullets that richochet wildly inside the tunnels, some of them embedding into the armour or hitting some loose bits and knocking them off.
Da Shark Heath: 9998
Armour: 85%
(GM's Tip: Ever played Mass Effect games? Yeah, this is just like that. Just wait until Shields get involved. :3)
You didn't do more than knock off a few glyphs and a loose plate or two, but the pause as the Grots recover enough to realise that Da Shark is still intact is enough for you to shout, "BACK UP!"
"Back up!" Lil Panzee shouts and yanks a lever before jamming her foot down on a pedal as the engine roars, sending the Boat-Buggy careening backwards as you fire again.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!"
Bullets fly everywhere, filling the tunnel in front of you with sparks of light as the Boat-Buggy roars down the tunnel, the Mega Tank following after you as a speaker starts filling the air with the Grot tank commander swearing up a storm as you laugh. Even so, your mind is working overtime; it'll be a hard slog of a fight, which is good because you've gone without a decent fight for too long already.
Da Shark roars around corner, partially going up the rounded sides of the sewer tunnel as its turrets focused on you, "You're gonna get it now! Fire!"
Boat-Buggy Health: 5910
The Boat-Buggy rocks with the impact of several explosive shells near the vehicle, spraying bits of rock and gunk on everything as the chase continues, the shrapnel and shockwave of the explosion punching into armour and other important bits but thankfully you all remain unharmed as the Boat-Buggy slides around a corner and Da Shark follows, nearly tipping over as it rolls into view, the semi-deep water barely an impediment to the Grot Mega Tank's prodigious weight.
"Lose 'im fer a minute, I need ta plan!" You shout at Lil Panzee who happily corkscrews the Boat-Buggy while the Weird Grotz scream at the action and hold onto anything they can safely grab, including each other, as the Boat-Buggy evades Da Shark and rumbles down another tunnel, the noise of the engine sure to confuse the Grotz while Bossy Grot starts puking over the side.
"Oh, Light Above And Fires Below, how in the twelve underworlds is this Elanir able to do that kind of stuff?"
You ignore Bossy Grot as you consider your plan on how to deal with Da Shark.
[]Write In:
(Important: Make sure that any plan you come up with is labeled with your username, for easy voting. And make sure you use everything at your disposal! Dumb Boyz are Ded Boyz!)
Bonuses Get!: Bouncy(6), Armour-Destroyer(15), Flashy(20)!
[X]You can take this thing, and all that lovely skrap would be better off in your hands!
Your expert Mek eye takes in Da Shark and you figure out a rough idea of how tough it is.
Da Shark: Grot Mega Tank
Health: 10,000 (It's only the first Boss, even I have to give you a chance. Don't worry, they won't all be so easy as this one.
)Armour: 100% (All damage is reduced by the percentage indicated. Well, not that easy.)
This is gonna be a tough nut ta crack, but you got ya new Wierdshoota and you're itching to have a go at cracking open that Mega Tank so you could put it better use but first ya got to be sneaky and kunnin' to fool these Grotz as you motion for your Grotz to get on the Boat Buggy with a grunted, "Get on, we're leavin'."
Bossy Grot looks curious, "What is that thing? And how in the name of the Light did it get into the sewers?" That was actually a pretty smart question as you shoved her towards the Boat-Buggy, where she took a place with that big book in front of the three while they sat behind your chair and in front of the engine. That tank probably fell into the sewers somewhere and those cowardly grots decided that since they had the dakka, that meant they were in charge of the sewers.
Feh, Grotz, they could never be the boss of anything as you started the Boat-Buggy's engine with a throaty roar of the propellor before you drove into the water and turned the Boat-Buggy to face the Mega Tank, a hunch having you place Lil Panzee in the steery seat where she immediately began playing with the levers and pedals, causing the Boat-Buggy to shift forwards and back in the water while you got into position.
"I only got one fing ta say to youz lot." You rumble menacingly.
"Yeah? Wots dat?" The Grot with the fancy hat shouts back....
Armour-Piercing: 20%
Armour Destroyed: 15
Final Armour: 80%
Final Damage: 2
...and shrieks as you sneakily pull the trigger of Da Wierdshoota, spraying glowing bullets that richochet wildly inside the tunnels, some of them embedding into the armour or hitting some loose bits and knocking them off.
Da Shark Heath: 9998
Armour: 85%
(GM's Tip: Ever played Mass Effect games? Yeah, this is just like that. Just wait until Shields get involved. :3)
You didn't do more than knock off a few glyphs and a loose plate or two, but the pause as the Grots recover enough to realise that Da Shark is still intact is enough for you to shout, "BACK UP!"
"Back up!" Lil Panzee shouts and yanks a lever before jamming her foot down on a pedal as the engine roars, sending the Boat-Buggy careening backwards as you fire again.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!"
Bullets fly everywhere, filling the tunnel in front of you with sparks of light as the Boat-Buggy roars down the tunnel, the Mega Tank following after you as a speaker starts filling the air with the Grot tank commander swearing up a storm as you laugh. Even so, your mind is working overtime; it'll be a hard slog of a fight, which is good because you've gone without a decent fight for too long already.
Da Shark roars around corner, partially going up the rounded sides of the sewer tunnel as its turrets focused on you, "You're gonna get it now! Fire!"
Boat-Buggy Health: 5910
The Boat-Buggy rocks with the impact of several explosive shells near the vehicle, spraying bits of rock and gunk on everything as the chase continues, the shrapnel and shockwave of the explosion punching into armour and other important bits but thankfully you all remain unharmed as the Boat-Buggy slides around a corner and Da Shark follows, nearly tipping over as it rolls into view, the semi-deep water barely an impediment to the Grot Mega Tank's prodigious weight.
"Lose 'im fer a minute, I need ta plan!" You shout at Lil Panzee who happily corkscrews the Boat-Buggy while the Weird Grotz scream at the action and hold onto anything they can safely grab, including each other, as the Boat-Buggy evades Da Shark and rumbles down another tunnel, the noise of the engine sure to confuse the Grotz while Bossy Grot starts puking over the side.
"Oh, Light Above And Fires Below, how in the twelve underworlds is this Elanir able to do that kind of stuff?"
You ignore Bossy Grot as you consider your plan on how to deal with Da Shark.
[]Write In:
(Important: Make sure that any plan you come up with is labeled with your username, for easy voting. And make sure you use everything at your disposal! Dumb Boyz are Ded Boyz!)
Boss Fight: Da Shark 2
Gideon020
Really in the mood for ribs.
[X] Weird Stikkbombs
You set down your pack and dig out some of the Weird Stuff, some Skrap, and get to work before glancing at the Weird Grotz, "Oi, see if ya got anyfing dat can crack that zogger." They nod and Bossy Grot tries to open the book, only for it to not budge.
"What the heck? Come on, I'm your mistress you should open for me!" She growls as she tries to physically open the book when Smarty Grot snaps her fingers.
"Alex, what if you don't need to touch the Bible? Remember the stories? About how mages used the book to find spells?" Bossy Grot looks confused for a moment as Smarty Grot continues, "Focus your intention, and move your hand as if opening the book, like Master Lugin does with his!" Bossy Grot nods as you quickly bash together the Stikkbomms before she holds her hand out with a look of concentration before moving it slowly, the big book shifting and slowly opening but not very fast.
"Urrgh, it's so heavy, I can't get it open!" Bossy Grot grunts while you quickly fold some Skrap and Tuff Skrap and carefully secure them with some thick string you found in order to form a cup that you pour ammo powder into followed by a few of the more volatile-looking bits of Weird Stuff and tamping it all down followed by a roughly-secured cap of Skrap and Flash Skrap. Satisfied that it won't fall apart you begin making a few more Bomms as Wimpy Grot speaks up.
"Maybe...maybe we need to do it together? Will that work?" Smarty Grot shrugs and stands next to Bossy Grot before doing the same thing, and the book begins to open faster. Buoyed by her success, Wimpy Grot joins in and the moment she matches the pose the book flies open and the three are posed identically with their arms outstretched, a green glow coming from the book and illuminating them.
"Light above," Bossy Grot whispers but you've had enough of this mukkin' about...
...so you tap Bossy Grot on the forehead, hard, "Gerron wiv it! In case ya fergot, dere'z a tank looking to turn us into Squig Meat so find somethin' nasty and killy to crack that nut open!" Bossy Grot blinks slowly as if she's dreaming, before slowly nodding and as one the Weird Grotz narrow their eyes as the book's glow increases.
"Boss..." LIl Panzee starts to say and you are about to question her when you notice her finger and turn just in time to see Da Shark turn a corner and catch sight of you.
"Aw Zog."
"Fire Da Killy Shot!" Da Shark's Grot-Kaptin screams and the front cannons roar...
One flies off target and explodes in the sewer wall, tearing apart masonry and caving in the tunnel, but the second...
Killy Multiplier: x5
Final Damage: 210
Health/Hit Locations:
-Head: 15
-Left Arm: 115
-Right Arm: 115
-Chest: 265
-Left Leg: 115
-Right Leg: 115
The shell explodes before it hits you, a Killy Shell packed to bursting with razor-sharp shrapnel and little explosive bits, lacerating your body as the blast lifts you off your feet and slams you against the steering area, knocking you unconscious.
"Boss!" Lil Panzee screams as she backs up the Boat-Buggy and makes a run for it while her free hand pulls the completed Weird Stikkbomms towards her. Once she feels the situation is safe, she begins checking your unconscious body, which is a mess of lacerations from the shrapnel and blood is pouring everywhere from where you were hit.
Lil Panzee considers what she should do while in her dream-like haze, Bossy Grot registers what has happened to you.
They need to figure out a plan now that their Boss is out of action.
[]Follow Lil Panzee's perspective
-[]Write In
[]Follow Alex's perspective
-[]Write In
You set down your pack and dig out some of the Weird Stuff, some Skrap, and get to work before glancing at the Weird Grotz, "Oi, see if ya got anyfing dat can crack that zogger." They nod and Bossy Grot tries to open the book, only for it to not budge.
"What the heck? Come on, I'm your mistress you should open for me!" She growls as she tries to physically open the book when Smarty Grot snaps her fingers.
"Alex, what if you don't need to touch the Bible? Remember the stories? About how mages used the book to find spells?" Bossy Grot looks confused for a moment as Smarty Grot continues, "Focus your intention, and move your hand as if opening the book, like Master Lugin does with his!" Bossy Grot nods as you quickly bash together the Stikkbomms before she holds her hand out with a look of concentration before moving it slowly, the big book shifting and slowly opening but not very fast.
"Urrgh, it's so heavy, I can't get it open!" Bossy Grot grunts while you quickly fold some Skrap and Tuff Skrap and carefully secure them with some thick string you found in order to form a cup that you pour ammo powder into followed by a few of the more volatile-looking bits of Weird Stuff and tamping it all down followed by a roughly-secured cap of Skrap and Flash Skrap. Satisfied that it won't fall apart you begin making a few more Bomms as Wimpy Grot speaks up.
"Maybe...maybe we need to do it together? Will that work?" Smarty Grot shrugs and stands next to Bossy Grot before doing the same thing, and the book begins to open faster. Buoyed by her success, Wimpy Grot joins in and the moment she matches the pose the book flies open and the three are posed identically with their arms outstretched, a green glow coming from the book and illuminating them.
"Light above," Bossy Grot whispers but you've had enough of this mukkin' about...
...so you tap Bossy Grot on the forehead, hard, "Gerron wiv it! In case ya fergot, dere'z a tank looking to turn us into Squig Meat so find somethin' nasty and killy to crack that nut open!" Bossy Grot blinks slowly as if she's dreaming, before slowly nodding and as one the Weird Grotz narrow their eyes as the book's glow increases.
"Boss..." LIl Panzee starts to say and you are about to question her when you notice her finger and turn just in time to see Da Shark turn a corner and catch sight of you.
"Aw Zog."
"Fire Da Killy Shot!" Da Shark's Grot-Kaptin screams and the front cannons roar...
One flies off target and explodes in the sewer wall, tearing apart masonry and caving in the tunnel, but the second...
Killy Multiplier: x5
Final Damage: 210
Health/Hit Locations:
-Head: 15
-Left Arm: 115
-Right Arm: 115
-Chest: 265
-Left Leg: 115
-Right Leg: 115
The shell explodes before it hits you, a Killy Shell packed to bursting with razor-sharp shrapnel and little explosive bits, lacerating your body as the blast lifts you off your feet and slams you against the steering area, knocking you unconscious.
"Boss!" Lil Panzee screams as she backs up the Boat-Buggy and makes a run for it while her free hand pulls the completed Weird Stikkbomms towards her. Once she feels the situation is safe, she begins checking your unconscious body, which is a mess of lacerations from the shrapnel and blood is pouring everywhere from where you were hit.
Lil Panzee considers what she should do while in her dream-like haze, Bossy Grot registers what has happened to you.
They need to figure out a plan now that their Boss is out of action.
[]Follow Lil Panzee's perspective
-[]Write In
[]Follow Alex's perspective
-[]Write In
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