Memento Vivere [FFX, FFX-2]

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

Memento Vivere

Sin is a memory, Vegnagun is scrap metal and a new era of peace has swept over Spira. It's not enough for Rikku, who is still waiting for her own story to begin. But what happens when her search brings her on a pilgrimage to the past... literally?

Cover artwork by Vaiana

MATURE CONTENT NOTICE

This fiction contains MATURE CONTENT. This is the FULLY UNCENSORED version you can also find on AO3 - all intimate scenes, all song lyrics, although the mature content warning is actually for a discussion of statutory rape that takes place in chapter 47, not (in my opinion) any salacious content. Also, this is very important -- this is a time travel fiction. That means Rikku is 20, Auron is 25, Jecht is 27 and Braska is 35 years old. NO ONE here is underage. Like every true FFX/X-2 fan knows, Will and Eien no Daishō simply don't exist.

Author Foreword
When I started writing this in 2006, I originally dedicated it to two friends who passed before me. Since then many other inspirational figures have moved on to greater things, and some of them have had a direct influence on this work. So for Liz, Val, Monty Oum, David Bowie, Prince, Leonard Cohen, Lemmy Klimster, George Michael and just in general, all of the great artists who were taken from us much too soon - this one's (still) for you; nothing's ever in vain. My deepest thanks to the betas who have helped make this work less of a disaster than it really should be: Fwe (ca 2006-2008) and Ciesste (2016-2019), and of course to rr1963 who unwittingly birthed the plot bunny for this fic with his own epic work, "Soldier of Spira."

Where's My Happy Ending?
Bevelle, All Over Again
Debunking A Legend
Rikkma's Arrival
An Evening At Braska's
Haute Couture
Machina Machinations
A Matter of Fayth
Personal Revelations
She Knew No Sin
An Impossible Dream
Truce
Reflections
Fiend Filching
A Quick Battle
Bartering
Cold Hard Truth
Uncertain
Sheer Luck
Fancy Footwork
Shocked
Dreaming
Plant Plié
The Shoopuf Incident
Abstinence and the Heart
Blitzoff
Frozen
Ancient History
Trial By Lightning
The Caterpillar's Stand
Awakenings
Mambo de Chocobo
Warmup
The Language Of Touch
The Big Game
The Concert
A Fond Farewell
Wrecked
The Ruin
The Fayth's Trial
Reunion
The Temple Of Fire
The Second Concert
Reconciliation
A Heap Of Huts
Ghosts Of The Past
Sea Skirmish
Water Runs Deeper
Family Ties
Painted Air
Challenged
Spirits And Memories
Sword Saint
A Place In The Sky
Going Wild
Shared Burdens
Honor's Price
Connected
Regroup
Machina Madness
Remiem's Remnants
Challenger
A Summoner's Intuition
A Chilly Reception
Servants of the Mountain
Scars
Guardians
A Place of Memories
Marching Towards Destiny
Soeng
Dream Eater
Dawnbreak
Always
Breakthrough
City of Dying Dreams
Original Sin
Summoner's Sacrifice
The Course of History
Potential
The Long Road Home
Falling (Again)
Return to Form
Epilogue

This story has a TV Tropes page.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

1: Where's My Happy Ending?

Rikku was feeling cheated. She sprawled herself messily over the deck of the gently humming airship and let the wind wash over her face. It was a beautiful day; then again, almost every day in Spira was beautiful since both Sin and Vegnagun had been defeated. People were so wildly happy that Paine would often be heard groaning about how all the good cheer and smiles made her want to break a few teeth. While usually Rikku was content to let herself be a part of Paine's problem, today was different. Sure, it was just as beautiful as any other day in Spira, full of smiles and happiness and song and dance, but something was off. Something besides the fact that Yuna and Paine were no longer travelling on the Celsius with her, nor had they been for almost half a year.

With Tidus' return, Yuna was content to settle in Besaid for a much-deserved rest. Paine, on the other hand, left to serve under Nooj once more, as had the rest of the boys from their close-knit Crimson Squad circle. It was in fact their group that was largely responsible for maintaining the peace and stability that Spira currently enjoyed. And that left Rikku with Brother, Buddy and Shinra on the Celsius; they were still the Gullwings and still involved in the never-ending hunt for spheres, even if their numbers had thinned.

Rikku knew she should be happy, satisfied with her lot in life. It wasn't everyone who got a chance to save the world, and she actually had done it twice in a row! Still, she felt as though something was missing; adventures were well and fine, but Rikku wanted to do more than just save the world. Or more accurately, she wanted to do less than save the world for once. She wanted to find that little niche of contentment that both Yuna and Paine had managed to carve for themselves; she wanted to belong somewhere, with someone. And while she didn't doubt that Brother would manage to make a complete mess of things if she wasn't around, spending the rest of her life with the Gullwings was not Rikku's idea of a good niche. At that moment it seemed more like an unavoidable pitfall. Closing her eyes, Rikku took a deep breath and examined the little ball of discontent in her stomach closely: Yep, a slight constriction in the chest, a sense of restless boredom and a sudden need to sit up and scream loudly.

"AAH!"

"Whoa, everything all right up there?" Buddy's voice spilled out over the intercom, and Rikku shut her mouth and blinked.

"Oops, I really did that?" she giggled nervously to herself. Then she scowled in the direction of the huge hatch of the airship, waving a vaguely rude gesture towards the speakers. "I'm fine, fine!" she hollered. "I thought I told you that I wanted to be left alone!"

"Hey, don't chew my head off," Buddy answered almost immediately. "Brother's the one who wanted to check up on you. Blame him!"

"Uuh," Rikku replied, dropping her head into her knees with a low groan. "Why can't he keep his nose in his own business?" she muttered loudly.

The response was almost inevitable: "RIKKU! I HEARD THAT!" Another loud crackle erupted from the speakers, probably Buddy managing to wrest the intercom out of Brother's angry grasp.

"We're just worried about you. So are you gonna come in anytime soon?"

"Alright, I'm coming already, don't get so excited!" Rikku shouted, springing to her feet. She gave her tiny skirt a few cursory pats and turned towards the hatch. The Celsius was flying low today and not particularly quickly, but even so the rush of the wind was incredible, whipping her messy blond hair into her face. "Oww," Rikku hissed, pushing away some of the braids and beads that slapped at her cheeks. "Maybe it's time to cut the mop again!" She stomped towards the door, the wind stinging her face. It didn't help improve her sullen mood. The hatch slid open smoothly and the ever-comforting rhythm of machina at work greeted her, and soon she was riding the large steel platform back down into the heart of the airship.

The Celsius was Brother's pride and joy; custom rigged and lovingly cared for by both himself and Rikku, it was quite possibly the most advanced airship in all of Spira - and definitely the best looking, in Rikku's personal opinion. After their first Home had been destroyed, it became the closest replacement they had found for the original. If she was honest with herself, Rikku loved the airship just as much as her brother did; just being inside of it usually comforted her. Not on this particular day, however; the normally-pleasant whirr of machinery was grating on her nerves and made her feel jumpier than usual.

"Where is it, anyway?" she grumbled to herself, crossing her arms and pacing impatiently across the platform as the elevator was lowered. "Where's my happy ending?" She closed her eyes and blew out a loud breath. The jolt of the platform coming to a stop shook her out of her contemplation, and Rikku scowled into the empty corridor. "Happy endings don't just happen, Rikku!" she scolded herself out loud. "You have to make them, right?" And if I'm not finding them here, then maybe…

Like with most of her ideas, Rikku grabbed onto the nascent thought and ran with it before it was fully formed. "Besaid?" she mused out loud. "Naw, Yunie and Tidus probably don't want me hanging around and bugging them again so soon." She strode into the elevator quickly and slammed the button for the cabins, mumbling to herself the entire way. "Bevelle? Nu-uh, no way! I still hate that place! I don't see how Paine can stand it there!" She barely gave a wave to the barkeep as she skipped up the steps and over towards her bed. "Maybe Mount Gagazet. I haven't seen Kimahri in a while…" She checked her thought and looked down at her skimpy clothing, wrinkling her nose. "Then again, it's always snowing there. Brrr, I'm getting cold just thinking about it!"

Sitting heavily on the bed, Rikku rummaged through the mess in her drawer, humming absently to herself as she picked out a small selection of spheres and shuffled a few garment grids through her hands. Before they had parted ways, the three girls had split the collection of small, stone-like tablets between themselves as mementos of their adventures together. Though she hardly needed them for anything other than basic self-defence against the usual run-of-the-mill fiends on the more perilous excursions, Rikku found herself wearing them often out of habit, almost like jewellery. She had even begun to tool up fanciful belts to match the patterns inscribed on the varying tablets. Quickly sorting through her haphazard collection of spheres and grids, she settled on one and began to ornament it with the spheres she had chosen. "Always gotta remember to accessorize," she announced proudly when she was finished, snapping the belt into place. As soon as she did, she closed her eyes and sucked in her breath sharply at the tingle of electricity that raced up her spine; equipping the magic-imbued grids was always a little bit uncomfortable at first. Lulu had tried her best to school Rikku in the ways of black magic during Yuna's Pilgrimage, but apart from the most basic of the elemental spells, the complexity of higher magic had always eluded Rikku's grasp. Wearing the Conflagration Grid was like slipping a pair of magnifying glasses over her magical nerves, bringing her limited capability into painfully sharp focus and augmenting it with a burst of artificial power. After a few seconds, her fingers stopped tingling and she opened her eyes.

"Whew, what a rush!" Rikku yelled, forgoing the stairs in favour of leaping down from the balcony. Barkeep eyed her suspiciously from behind the counter; at least, as suspiciously as any hypello could manage to appear.

"Mish Rikku, are yoo planning another trip?" he asked placidly, slapping his long fingers together.

Rikku flashed the little hypello a wide grin. "Yep! There's something I gotta do, and I've been putting it off for long enough. But don't worry, I'll be back lickity-split! I bet you guys won't even notice that I'm gone!"

Barkeep nodded and blinked at her; she knew that it was his own hypello-version of a smile. "Maybe yoo should tell the others," he added diplomatically as an afterthought.

"Of course I will! Somebody has to fly me there after all!"

"Fly you where?" Buddy walked in and crossed his arms. "Brother sent me to find you, he wanted you up on the bridge five minutes ago."

Rikku only rolled her eyes and huffed, stomping out the door. She heard Buddy's footsteps echoing behind her and slouched against the wall of the elevator, waiting for him to follow.

"So… are you gonna tell me about this new plan of yours, or you just planning to break it to Brother once we're up there?" Buddy sounded vaguely amused, but there was a hint of concern underneath the question. He held off from hitting the panel that would bring them towards the bridge as he waited for her answer.

"Well…" Rikku began, fidgeting. She hadn't planned much of anything yet, in reality; she was still silently debating where she wanted to go to begin her journey. All she knew was that wherever her happy ending was hiding, it wasn't going to be found on the Celsius in the company of her friends. "I just feel like I need to go off on my own for a while," she finally admitted. "You know, spread my own wings, that sorta thing!"

"Huh," Buddy replied, scratching the back of his head and sounding unconvinced. "You always do your own thing whether we're around or not anyway," he informed her. Seeing her fidget nervously and remain silent, he shrugged in defeat and smiled at her. "Alright, you don't have to spill if you don't want to. Just tell me this. Are we gonna regret letting you do whatever it is you're planning?"

"No!" Rikku replied, falling into a sulk instantly. "Why do you guys always assume the worst about my plans, anyway?"

Buddy laughed, shaking his head. "Because you're Crazy Cid's kid. Because you're related to Brother. Because you know I'm right. I can list specifics if you want. Oh, like that time you wanted to try introducing Chocobo Racing into Bevelle to 'loosen them up' …" he began, holding out a hand and ticking off a finger. Rikku scowled. "Or how about when you took us snowboarding at Lake Macalania?"

"Listen! That was a perfectly fine idea until those fiends showed up! How was I supposed to know the ice was so thin?"

Buddy only shook his head again and shrugged. "See what I mean?"

Rikku rolled her eyes and slammed the button for the bridge with an impatient huff. "I'm NOT going to get you into trouble this time, I swear! I just …" she looked down and rolled on the balls of her feet uncomfortably. "I just need some time for myself, you know? There's some stuff I gotta find, and I don't think you guys can help me with it this time."

"Hmm," Buddy said, regarding her thoughtfully. "We've all noticed you've been kind of ornery the past few weeks…"

"ORNERY?" Rikku yelled shrilly, balling her hands into fists. "What's that supposed to mean, huh?"

"… tense, I mean tense," Buddy corrected immediately. "Maybe you're right, though. I guess we could all use a little vacation every now and then." The elevator pulled to a stop, and as the doors opened they could hear the loud cries of Brother leaking through the heavy metal bulkhead of the cockpit as he argued with Shinra. "… maybe this isn't the best place to do some thinking anyhow." The walked out into the corridor, but he paused once again before they entered the bridge. "But you know, Rikku … we'll always be here for you if you need us. You're a Gullwing, after all. That means you're family."

Rikku blinked unexpectedly; Buddy was far more observant than he usually let on. She could see he was concerned for her, and felt a vague stab of guilt that she was planning on leaving them so unexpectedly for an uncertain purpose and with no real goals other than to 'find herself.' "Family," she repeated faintly, giving him a thankful smile. "Don't worry so much, I'll be back as soon as I've figured out what it is that I'm looking for."

Buddy gave her a short nod. "We trust you," he said simply, and then opened the hatch.

"RIKKU!" Brother's head shot up immediately as she stepped onto the bridge. "There you are! What took you so long? We have sphere waves coming in from –"

"Well they're gonna have to wait!" Rikku said immediately, holding up a hand and silencing her sputtering brother. "There's somewhere I need to go before I can do any more sphere hunting for the Gullwings!"

"WHAT?" Brother yelled, throwing his hands up into the air.

Buddy only shook his head tiredly, giving Rikku a cursory pat on the shoulder before taking his post at the helm. "I think Rikku wants a little vacation," he said cautiously.

"We just came back from that vacation in Besaid two weeks ago," Shinra piped up, looking over his shoulder at the others. "Why do we need another?"

"EXCELLENT QUESTION!" Brother yelled, circling his hands even more wildly above his head. "Though… if you mean to say you want to go back to Besaid to visit Yuna …" he began thoughtfully.

"Hey!" Rikku yelled, jumping up and down angrily. "I need a vacation! Not you guys! Me! Me only! And I'm not going to Besaid!" she added, causing Brother's face to fall.

"Me me me," he mimicked, sneering at Rikku. "That is all you ever think about. What about our treasure hunt? What about the Celsius? What about Yuna?" he added, the last question coming out a bit mournfully.

"Ugh, this is why I don't talk to you," Rikku replied, rolling her eyes. "I'm going on a vacation by myself, and that's final! You guys will just have to learn to live without me. Terrible, I know!" she added with a grin.

"Hah!" Brother replied, glaring at his sister. "This is just another one of your last minute ideas to get out of sphere hunting, isn't it? I bet you do not even know where you want to go!" He crossed his arms and waited with a knowing smirk.

"Hey! That is so not true!" Rikku yelled angrily, stomping over to the control panel. She pulled up the spinning hologram of the world map and stared at it blankly for a few moments, feeling Brother's eyes boring into her. Think, Rikku, think! Squinting, she trailed a finger over the continent trying to pick a destination, when inspiration suddenly struck her. "For your information, I'm going to Guadosalam!" she informed them triumphantly.

Silence fell as everyone spun around to stare at her then.

"Why?" Shinra finally asked.

Yeah, why? Rikku repeated to herself nervously, feeling their eyes on her. Guadosalam had nothing but bad memories for the Al Bhed; from boasting the location of the Farplane, to being the former home of the people who had destroyed their own, to the simple fact that the LeBlanc Syndicate still practically owned the town. "I just do. Don't ask, okay?" she answered with a snap, feeling defensive.

"You really mean to do this, Rikku?" Brother asked, narrowing his eyes at her. He was annoying, and loud, and he had a tendency to overreact to the slightest provocation, but in the end he was still her brother. Rikku smiled and gave him a small nod, and his expression softened minutely. Then he drew his face into a hard scowl. "Fine. But you will owe me big for this, you understand?"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Rikku replied, sticking her tongue out at his back. "Thanks," she muttered under her breath, but he gave no indication of having heard her.

.x.x.x.

"What am I doing here?" Rikku mumbled, staring at the swirling pool of light that marked the entrance to the Farplane. She thought her adventures with Yuna would have cured her of her reluctance to enter the Farplane, but now those days seemed like a lifetime ago, and all of the old fears were quickly resurfacing.

The Al Bhed didn't fear the Farplane; they did scorn it, however, or at least scorn those who considered it to be a gateway to communicate with the dead. "Everything has a simple explanation, and if it can't be explained, it just hasn't been studied enough yet." That motto definitely applied towards pyreflies and the visions they formed when one entered the Farplane. It was the explanation Rikku liked to rely on when trying to explain why she didn't enjoy visiting it. It wasn't the truth, however, at least not her truth.

Truth, for Rikku, was that she was scared of the things she thought she might see on the Farplane. She wanted to keep her memories of the people she had lost frozen inside of her head, trapped in happier times; letting the pyreflies project those thoughts for all the world to see felt not only like a violation of her privacy, but also a release; that somehow, they would steal her happy memories away and leave her alone with only the sadness.

She paced outside of the gate of light nervously; the last visitors had long since exited, and considering the late hour it was unlikely that any more were going to come through that night. Not that anyone could ever tell what time of day it actually was in Guadosalam; the underground community was perpetually lit with a sleepy evening atmosphere, while the Farplane was bathed in an eternal sunset.

"Ohh, stop stalling and just do it!" she told herself, grabbing her head and whipping her braids around. Then, biting her lip, she screwed her eyes shut and threw herself through the barrier. A brief, misty sensation of coldness passed over her skin, as though Shiva had blown her a gentle kiss. It faded, though the cool air did not, and cautiously Rikku opened one eye.

"This is it," she breathed softly, climbing the stone steps and taking in the endless sky and swirling clouds that surrounded the platform. The Farplane was as breathtaking as she remembered it; beautiful and cold and so very, very empty. The quiet song of the pyreflies filled the air, and Rikku shivered convulsively. "Creepy!" she yelled loudly, mostly in an attempt to instil herself with courage and chase away the gentle sighs of the pyreflies. "This isn't as bad as thunder," she told herself, grinding her fingers into her palm and stepping forward stiffly. "Time to face some old fears.". She approached the edge of the stony plateau resolutely and looked into the mists below. Color and light filled the air, along with the dull roar of falling water. There was something achingly beautiful about the Farplane, and yet sad … for all the beauty there, it was still barren and empty. "What good are flowers if nobody sees them bloom?" Rikku asked herself softly, settling along the edge of the rock and letting her feet dangle over the drop. A few pyreflies gathered around the tips of her boots, and Rikku watched them swirl there with detached fascination. Hard to believe fiends are made out of these little guys, she thought to herself. Not only fiends, she remembered. The pyreflies twirled away from her boots and swirled in front of her, and Rikku swallowed thickly.

"Mom," she said softly, looking at the figure that slowly faded into view. Unexpected tears stung at her eyes; it was her mother, floating before her in much sharper clarity than her fuzzy memory could recall. "A-are you really here?" she whispered, reaching a hand out towards the image. But the image simply smiled at her, floating there, strangely alive and yet never changing, never acknowledging her presence with anything more than a soft smile. Rikku let her hand drop. "Just a memory after all, huh?" she whispered, wiping at her eyes angrily. "We're right, aren't we, mom? This isn't a gateway to the past, it's just one big fat sphere for broadcasting your own memories." She felt foolish for her brief moment of wild belief, that it might against all odds actually be her real mother standing there before her. When she looked up, the image was already fading from view.

"Just memories of the dead," she repeated. The pyreflies swirled and twisted again, and Rikku smiled at the man floating before her. "Hey, Keyakku," she said, blinking back another wave of tears. "Long time no see. Father and Brother miss you, ya know. Not like they'd ever say it." He only looked back at her, an almost-smile playing across his face, the same one she had seen on her mother. "Me too, I guess," she added softly. She was glad that he wasn't wearing his goggles this time; she had almost forgotten the green of his eyes. "You always were the responsible one. So be sure and look after mom for us till we get there, will you?" she whispered, giving him a little wave. The pyreflies swirled around him and he disappeared.

"It's not so bad," Rikku reasoned to herself with a small sigh. "I guess… it is sort of nice to be able to say goodbye." She smiled hesitantly to herself. "I wonder if it really is like a sphere projector …" Closing her eyes, she thought hard. Then she cracked them open and let out a small squeal of delight. The pyreflies had reformed, and she smiled at the figure before her. "Hey, Jecht! I hope Tidus doesn't mind me seeing you here," she said as she waved. Not surprisingly, he didn't reply. "I guess I don't know you all that well, but I was just a little curious to see if I could get you here since we never really met in person. Uh, well, unless you count the time that we helped kill you with Tidus … but you weren't really yourself then so that doesn't count!" she finished with an embarrassed rush. She knew he wasn't really there, but it still felt awkward to be saying it out loud. "Sorry about that anyway," she added with a tiny wince. I don't know why I'm feeling so guilty about this. He wanted to die, after all, he practically asked Tidus to kill him! Besides, if you wanna get technically technical about it, you could say Yunalesca killed him …

The pyreflies reformed, and Rikku froze in terror. "HOLY MACHINA!" she screamed, nearly losing her balance on the stone. Yunalesca only smiled back in response, her long hair swaying in the non-existent breeze. After a few seconds, Rikku's heart fell out of her throat and she regarded the bikini-clad woman cautiously. "Geez, you're just as creepy dead as you were alive! Or, uh, undead, or whatever you were. Why don't you just … shoo! Go away!" It wasn't working; the more Rikku tried to NOT think about Yunalesca, the more solid her image seemed to become.

"Ahh! I have to stop thinking about dead people!" Rikku shouted, grabbing her head and shaking it wildly. "Think of the living Rikku! How about … uhh … Gippal! Yeah, think of Gippal!" She focused on his cocky grin and his wry smile, and sure enough, the pyreflies slowly dissipated. Unfortunately for Rikku, she now had one highly annoying and still living Al Bhed on her mind. Why does he have to be so cute? she thought to herself in annoyance. There was a time when Rikku had feelings of more than friendship for him; she still found herself getting flustered in his presence much too easily, a fact that he obviously delighted exploiting. "I can't believe I still have a crush on that dork Gippal. I mean, he flirted with Yunie the first time he met her! He flirts with everything that moves!" She crossed her arms over her chest and slumped over. "I don't like people who flirt! Well, okay, so I do, but I don't like GUYS who flirt! They never take anything seriously!"

Rikku suddenly straightened up as the words left her mouth. "That's it!" she mumbled, staring blankly ahead of her. "That's my niche. I'm looking for someone who'll take me seriously." She furrowed her brows, trying to recall the last time that had happened. "Sheesh … when have I not been the resident comic relief for everyone?" she wondered. Then she doubled over and snickered loudly. "When we were on pilgrimage with Yuna, that's when. Tidus was clueless enough to take the load off of my shoulders sometimes! Hee hee … I kinda miss those days." She refocused on the swirling pyreflies as she spoke, and the smile slowly slid off of her face. "Oh, it's you," she said finally.

Auron looked back at her impassively; she noted with a faint sense of amusement that even his pyrefly image didn't have the same half-smile as the others. That's Sir Auron for you. Scowling even in the afterlife, Rikku thought to herself with a grin. It quickly faded as she studied his face; familiar tufts of grey at his temples, the jagged scar running across one eye and the high collar of his cloak obscuring his expressive lips. She almost wished that it wasn't there so she could see his face in its entirety; the pyreflies, however, formed images out of memory, and she couldn't recall a time when he had ever let his guard down enough to show her his entire face.

"This isn't fair," she told him, pulling her knees up under her chin and wrapping her arms around her legs. "Yunie got Tidus, and Paine got Nooj. Well, I guess that means she got LeBlanc, too, so there's some kind of justice in that, huh? But she also got Baralai and Gippal. And what do I have? Brother, and Buddy and Shinra. I guess they're not bad, but … I'm beginning to think I don't have a knight in shining armor waiting for me anywhere, you know?" Rikku rolled her eyes upwards, not that this Auron could actually see the gesture and appreciate it. "That's a real confidence booster."

Auron said nothing; in that sense, the image was very much in keeping with the man she remembered.

"Ugh, I feel stupid, talking to myself like this," she told him conversationally. "It's easier to say it now that you're sorta here, though. That's what I really came for, I guess. To deal with my … issues." She laughed lightly, trying to avoid the inevitable. That, of course, only made his image sharpen and solidify even more.

Contrary to popular belief, Rikku wasn't stupid. There was a reason there were no knights in shining armor waiting for her, and she knew perfectly well why as she looked at it. It was the same reason Paine teased her for stubbornly using her samurai dressphere despite the fact that she had no upper arm strength worth speaking of; the one that she was fairly certain Yuna knew of by the red cloth that cloaked her every time she activated it. Yuna had spent her time carrying Tidus' sword, and Rikku … she had chosen to carry Auron's. "No one even comes close," she told him with a wry smile. "I guess it is kind of hard to compete with a dead legend." Her face fell, and she wished more than ever that she could reach out and touch him, that he would be real.

"Why'd you have to be the first one to really see me? To see I wasn't just some idiot girl and take me seriously? Why'd it have to be someone like you?" she asked him. "And why'd you have to die before I could even tell you how I felt?"

The image was silent, unchanging except for the phantom breeze that ruffled his hair. This Auron had no answers for her; she could easily hear what he would say, had he still been there.

There never was a chance. I was already dead, long before you came.

"But you were still real," she protested helplessly. "Now you're just a memory, like mom and Keyakku, too dead to love me back but still alive enough to make me miserable." She sighed bitterly and dropped her forehead into her knees, blocking his image from her sight. "Better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all, they say," she choked out. "Not like I'd know, huh, Auron? Seeing as how I'm landing face-first into that never loved at all crowd."

Rikku kept her head planted firmly in her knees and thought about crying, but the tears wouldn't come. Five years was a long time to spend weeping over unrequited love, and Rikku wasn't the moping type. Instead, she was filled with a bitter sense of injustice. She wanted to spring to her feet and scream that it wasn't fair, that she deserved another chance, or at least the opportunity to have caught her heart and brought it back safely before Auron could carry it away, dissolving it with his measured steps and his pyreflies and his refusal to look back just one last time, please!

When she felt certain that she was finished with not crying, Rikku lifted her head and looked up warily. He was still there, unmoving, unchanging, though at least the image had fuzzed slightly. She could see the bright specks of light shining through his heavy read coat, lazily twisting through his chest, sometimes brighter, sometimes almost completely obscured by his figure. "I guess I have to leave you first this time," she told him apologetically.

Tucking her feet in, Rikku pushed off the ground and rolled into a standing position. Afterwards, in the brief moment between her rational realization of gravity's consequences and raw panic, she had time to analyze what caused her to trip. It might have been because she was sitting in the same position for so long that her legs fell asleep. Or it might have been the sudden, unexpected gust of wind that swept across the still plateau as she rose. The way she had situated herself directly on the edge of the rock certainly didn't help at all. Or maybe, just maybe, it was the fleeting feeling of being pushed, ever so gently. Whatever the reasons, she was falling in a bundle of flailing limbs and flying hair, watching the plateau grow smaller with each passing second.

Rikku had always imagined she would have something witty to say just before she died. "Banzai!" perhaps, or "So long, nice knowin' ya!" or maybe even "If I'm going down, you're coming with me!" Instead, all she could do was gasp soundlessly and make a futile grasp for the safety of the stone that disappeared into the mists far too quickly for her liking.

This is not my happy ending! I don't want to become a fiend! Wait, can you even become a fiend in the Farplane? Maybe I won't need to get sent because I'm already here, so everything will work out just fine. Well, except for the fact that I DON'T WANNA DIE OH GOD OH GOD OHGOD—

Everything went white. Or perhaps it was always white; the living were cautioned not to spend too much time in the Farplane because things were different there; time and space melded together. The Farplane was the realm of the spirit, and did not follow the rules of logic and flesh; those who tried to stay there would go stark raving mad, or so they claimed. Though she couldn't remember having had the time to fall asleep, when Rikku woke she realized that she was no longer falling. She wasn't standing on solid ground either, however; she was floating weightlessly, surrounded by cool white mists.

"Am I dead?" she asked herself breathlessly. Is this what it's like to have died? I don't feel any different. Experimentally, she held her hand in front of her face and squinted at it. It looked solid. Impulsively, she brought her fingers to her lips and bit down hard.

"OWW!" she yelled, drawing her hand away and shaking it out rapidly. Small flecks of blood were welling underneath the bite marks, and it stung painfully. "Feels like I'm alive," Rikku muttered cautiously. Raising her hand again, she tried one last time. Pyrefly-pyrefly-pyrefly! she instructed her fingers sternly. They remained solid no matter how much she tried to convince them to scatter. After a few more attempts punctuated by grunts, Rikku gave up and decided to assume that she was probably not dead.

"Where am I?" she asked, twisting around and trying to make out anything in the thick mist.

"You're in the Farplane," a voice answered, and Rikku yelped and spun around to face it.

"You… don't I know you from somewhere?" Rikku said uncertainly, eyeing the strange boy who was floating before her. His eyes were hidden by the heavy purple hood that was pulled low over his head. A slight smile twisted at his lips and he nodded at her.

"Yes," he told her. "We've met." He turned his back to her and Rikku's eyes were drawn to the elaborate wheel pattern embroidered on the back of the boy's shirt.

"You're a Fayth!" Rikku blurted out suddenly, covering her mouth with her hands. "You're—"

"What do you want?" Bahamut turned and regarded her silently.

Rikku balked and gaped at the phantom child. "I dunno, like, maybe not to die?" she yelled in frustration.

"All living things die. That is how it should be. Anything else would be cruel," Bahamut told her reasonably. "What do you want?" he asked her again.

I must be hallucinating, Rikku thought to herself hazily. Maybe I landed in that huge field of flowers on the bottom and hit my head or something. She rubbed her fingers together and winced at the sting of her bite wound. "I think I want to wake up," she said out loud.

The boy sighed softly and shook his head at her. "If you don't want to dream, then why did you come here?" he asked.

Dream? Rikku thought, confused. "I don't know why I came here in the first place," she said defensively. Liar, she admonished herself guiltily.

"Liar," Bahamut echoed. "You're just afraid of your dream."

"Well he's kind of a scary guy, don't you think!" Rikku blurted out, exasperated. "Even if he is… dead," she added more quietly, feeling her heart constrict in her chest.

"What do you want?" Bahamut asked her again patiently.

Rikku closed her eyes and let herself float in the mists. "I want…" She took a deep breath and tried to chase away all the worries and distractions that were clamouring for attention in her head. Keep it simple, she told herself sternly. Why did I come here?

"I want my own story."

"Hmm," she heard Bahamut say; it sounded like he was laughing with the light, carefree melody of a child. Yet underneath she heard a low rumble, a growl from the mouth of a dragon. And suddenly his voice seemed too old despite its youthful tone. "I can only open the door. You will still have to find your story by yourself."

Rikku craned her neck towards the voice, but her eyelids were too heavy to open; she was still floating, but her body felt like lead. "Why are you helping me?" she struggled to ask. "I'm not Yuna. I'm not even Paine! I'm just Rikku."

"Rikku is Rikku. That should be enough," she heard him say.

Or wasn't it Kimahri who had told me that? On Yuna's Pilgrimage… Rikku made the effort to pull her lips into a slight frown. "I … don't want … another … adventure …" she murmured, fighting to stay awake against the oppressive heaviness.

"What do you always say Rikku?" she heard Keyakku tell her teasingly as he handed her a wrench. "Three's a charm."

"Not … again … !"

Yuna was peering at her anxiously, worried by what she had seen after Rikku first activated the dressphere. "Do you really love him?" she asked her cousin softly.

"Who?" Rikku whispered, barely conscious.

"You know who," he answered, and she snapped to attention, struggling to stay awake.

"Auron?" Rikku asked, but her eyes wouldn't open.

"Did you mean what you said, about loving and losing?"

She could almost feel his breath on her face; breath? Had he even breathed when he was not-alive? "Auron … don't go," she cried. "Don't leave again, at least not without looking back." She let out a small whine of dismay as she felt his presence fading away.

"You'll have to choose what you love more in the end … Are you sure?"

"Choose? I just want to see you again," she mumbled. "See you really, not just my own memories. Even just … to say … g'bye." Her words slowed and slurred together as she lost control of her tongue.

"Remember your words," Rikku heard Bahamut say faintly. And then she felt as though she was being pulled apart, lifted, and she could feel her bones separating, and she didn't think bones could feel and it hurt so very much and it tickled all over and even if she knew she wasn't dead she sure as hell couldn't be alive to feel this and then—

"Jump."

Suddenly Rikku knew she was falling again, falling through the Farplane like before, the mist rushing past her ears and whistling through her hair, and that this time nothing would stop her. She was going to land in a field of flowers and die a messy, splatty, ugly death without ever having said anything cool before going, and nobody would even take the time to send her because she was already in the home of the dead.

"Jump! Now!"

A tickling in her head, a reminder … Bahamut's childish voice intruded on her thoughts again; he sounded almost urgent.

How can I jump? I'm already falling! Rikku mused wildly, flailing her arms out.

"You must not fear your dreams. Jump."

But …

"Things are different in the Farplane."

That was me, Rikku thought with a start. That was what I told myself earlier! Time is different here. Space is different here. She turned herself into the wind and spread her arms.

And hope… that's also different here.

Rikku jumped.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

2: Bevelle, All Over Again

Singing. Voices were singing to her, Rikku realized groggily. She blinked once, twice, then tried to shut her eyes and fall back asleep. Beautiful voices, men, women and children, all harmonized perfectly into an achingly familiar chorus, forcing her to stay awake. "Why?" she mumbled, feeling her insides curl. She knew the words to the song, just as any Spiran would.

Dream, Fayth. Forever and ever, grant us prosperity.

"No," Rikku murmured, opening her eyes again. The light of the pyreflies dazzled her, spinning lazily in and out of her vision before slowly drifting away into the dark sky. "No, this is a nightmare," she told herself firmly as the never-ending melody began anew. The Hymn of the Fayth was a heart-rending song, beautiful and terrible at the same time. To hear the song was to hear the Fayth. But where there was Fayth, there was also Sin.

Rikku shut her eyes again and tried to ignore the black sky and the feel of the cool concrete beneath her cheek. "Let this be a dream, just a dream," Rikku said again, clenching her hands into tight fists. Her fingertip stung sharply, and Rikku's eyes flew open. The wound from her bite was still there, slightly crusted over now and throbbing dully where she had worried the scab. And the Hymn still floated above her, sung as it only could be by the Fayth.

"This can't be happening…" Rikku mumbled as she sat up and rubbed her head. She took in her surroundings slowly. It was night and she was fairly certain she was outdoors; however, the tall, dark buildings rising all around her obscured her vision of the sky. Cradling her pounding head, Rikku carefully scrambled to her feet and leaned on the wall. She let out a sigh of relief as a quick check revealed that she was still all in one piece. That was where the good news ended; she still had no idea where she was or how she had arrived there.

Cautiously, she pressed her back against the building and crept down the alleyway; she could see the dim, artificial light of the street beyond and the shadowy forms of figures as they moved about the road. The Hymn of the Fayth was unusually loud, but no one seemed to notice or pay it any mind. Reaching the end of the alley, Rikku steeled herself and leaned out, looking up into the city.

Ornate, brightly-colored buildings rose high into the sky; banners flapped from the roofs of several of the structures. The street was bustling with activity; people mingled together in large crowds as they went about their business, forming a teeming morass of humanity. It was a sight Rikku recognized immediately, and she pulled back into the alley quickly with a quiet gasp.

"What the heck…" she whispered furiously, her hands automatically reaching for her daggers and pulling them out. "This is Bevelle!"

Only it wasn't Bevelle; not the Bevelle Rikku was familiar with, the one that Paine called her new stomping grounds and the seat of the Spiran government coalition. This was the Bevelle of the past - the manipulative, fearsome religious power that gave the Al Bhed nightmares. The flags and banners that flapped in the wind prominently displayed the symbol of Yevon and heavily-armed guards patrolled the streets with stern expressions. Priests and warrior monks could be seen wearing their old uniforms, bowing and saluting to each other as they went their separate ways.

"I'm in hell!" Rikku squeaked, taking a quick look at herself. She slid deeper into the safety of the alley, her numb fingers methodically feeling around her pockets for any sort of defence she could muster. And she would need it; with her outlandish mode of dress and long yellow hair, Rikku knew her appearance screamed poster girl for the entire Al Bhed race.

"This must be that aeon's idea of a sick, sick joke," she moaned to herself as she sprinted down the alley towards the opposite end of the street, trying to orient herself. "I knew I should've taken Paine up on that offer to tour through Bevelle before." She grit her teeth and peeked out of the other end of the alley. Then her step faltered and she stopped, mouth dropping open.

The Hymn of the Faith swelled to an unbearable level, and Rikku covered her ears and felt the color drain from her face. "That isn't right…" she mumbled in shock. There was a huge crowd gathered on the street; the people were watching a strange religious ceremony taking place in front of the ornate palace of Bevelle. That wasn't what had stopped Rikku cold; it was the participants that had shocked her.

"From henceforth," the quavering voice cried out, rising over the murmurs of the people gathered there, "… we shall accept the Ronso into Yevon's fold as one of our own, for we are all brothers and sisters of Spira. Go now with the blessing of Bevelle and spread the word unto your people. The mercy of Yevon shall be known to all who open their hearts to the Teachings!"

The massive, blue-furred creature straightened and turned, and Rikku felt her insides turn to lead. "Maester Kelk…" she gasped. Only he wasn't dressed as a Maester, and he did not yet wear the long white beard that set him apart from his brethren. Most importantly, however, Kelk was very obviously not dead. Though Rikku couldn't be sure that the same was true of Maester Mika, who stood at the Ronso's side, dwarfed by his huge companion. She even spotted someone who looked very much like Kinoc hovering behind them, though he was sporting much more hair and less paunch than she remembered. Kinoc stepped forward and raised his arms towards the people, a broad smile on his face.

"Praise be to Yevon!" she heard him yell, and the crowd erupted into wild cheers.

No. No, no no NO! Rikku thought wildly, grabbing her head and shaking it. "This isn't right! It's not Spira! It's not my Spira!" She didn't even realize she was shouting as she doubled over and tried to force herself to wake out of her nightmare. "Yevon is dead! Sin is dead! We paid for it already! We paid with blood and lives and hearts and Fayth and this is all a lie!"

A small crowd was beginning to form around her, and gasps went up as they recognized her race. Rikku ignored them, stumbling towards the palace that she knew housed the aeon within its depths. "Take me back home!" she yelled at it, as though Bahamut would be able to hear her through the thick stone walls. "I knew you guys were cruel, but how could you do this to me? How could you let Yunie's sacrifice go? How could you bring me back here? It's all wrong here and HOW COULD YOU!"

Her last scream was muffled as the first guard tackled her, and Rikku automatically ducked and shrugged him off, sending him flying with an elbow to the chin. She turned and sprinted for the palace, bowling through the surprised guards; the only thing she knew was that she had to get to the Chamber of the Fayth, to see the strange dragon-child and demand to be returned to her own reality.

"She's going for Mika!" someone shouted and the crowd screamed and parted. She heard the click of a gun and reached into her pouch, throwing a flash bomb behind her. It exploded simultaneously with the retort of the rifle, and people began to run in every direction, panicking. Rikku ignored them all, intent on breaking through into the palace; she stumbled and slowed down but refused to stop as another rifle cracked sharply and pain exploded in her shoulder.

"Damn! Alright, use some dream powder!" she heard another guard yell. A smoking canister landed at her feet and without pause Rikku picked it up and chucked it back in the direction that it had been thrown from. More cursing erupted behind her, and Rikku covered her mouth and held her breath, charging past the few remaining guards. Almost there, she thought wildly, lunging onto the dais and sweeping towards a very surprised Mika. Her sprint came to a painful halt as Kelk finally flung himself into her path, planting a meaty blue fist into her stomach. And then for the second time that day, the world exploded into white, and Rikku passed out.

.x.x.x.

"Ugh… I think I liked waking up better the first time," Rikku winced. Her entire body ached, and her shoulder was killing her. What the heck did I do? It feels like a chocobo's been having a dance party on my stomach! Did I try wrestling with Paine again or something?

"You're finally up," a gruff voice greeted her.

"No I'm not," Rikku replied immediately, keeping her eyes shut and trying to pinpoint why it felt like her shoulder was on fire. Better heal that first, she thought groggily, reaching for her pouch. Her hand closed over her hip onto empty air, and her eyes shot open. "My stuff! It's gone!" She tried to sit up and flopped back down instantly as her body protested to the motion. With a growing sense of apprehension Rikku felt around her waist and noticed her entire belt missing, including the garment grid. "Oh no!" she groaned.

"'Course your stuff's gone! You don't think they let you keep your gear in prison, do ya?"

Rikku forced her eyes open and glared at the source of the voice. "Shut up!" she yelled. Then her eyes widened and memory returned like a sledge hammer striking her forehead. There was no doubt about it; from the messy brown hair to the twisting tattoo across his chest, it was definitely Jecht who was leaning against the wall in the cell across from her own, giving her an amused smirk. "Juh-juh-juh…" she gawked, staring at him.

Jecht smiled and puffed up smugly, tapping his chest with a thumb. "Like what you see, huh?"

"Jecht! You're Sir Jecht!" Rikku finally managed to gasp out, pain momentarily forgotten as she regarded him with wide eyes. "What are you doing here?"

Jecht crossed his arms and looked puzzled. "Now, that's the first time I got a proper reaction ever since I arrived in this crazy town. Figures it would come from a loony," he grumbled to himself.

"Who're you calling a loony?" Rikku shot back immediately, her shock disappearing momentarily under indignation.

"That's what them guards called you. Some kinda loony from Al's bed. If this is where sleepin' with Al lands ya, you should probably dump the guy!" He took a moment to laugh at his own joke while Rikku could only stare, then gave her another broad smile. "So you've heard of me, huh? You a Blitzball fan?"

"No I'm not!" Rikku snapped at him, annoyed by his overbearing self-confidence. "Are you really Sir Jecht?" she repeated, sitting up slowly and dragging herself towards the bars to get a better look at him.

Jecht frowned and scratched the back of his head; for a moment he looked so much like Tidus that Rikku thought she would burst out laughing. Then she remembered that he thought she was crazy already and bit down on the impulse.

"I dunno why the hell you keep calling me that 'sir' junk, but yeah. Jecht's my name, Blitzball's my game." He gave her another practiced smile and posed, and Rikku resisted the urge to roll her eyes.

"Wow… Tidus wasn't joking about his ego," she muttered under her breath.

"What was that?" Jecht asked, lowering his eyebrows curiously.

"A-a-ah," Rikku fudged, fidgeting with her braids. The movement caused her to hiss in pain and she carefully reached back and touched her shoulder. When she drew her hand away, it was covered with flakes of dried blood. "Ouchie," she said miserably, trying to feel around the wound.

" 'ey, girl, you okay?" Jecht asked, looking at her with a little concern. "You were bleedin' pretty bad when they brought you in. I think they gave you some kinda medicine before they dumped ya. What'd you do anyway?"

Rikku scowled and gave up trying to assess the wound in her shoulder. "I was born, that's enough for these Yevonites," she muttered angrily.

"Yevawhats?" Jecht asked, confused.

"Yevonites," Rikku repeated, shaking her head. Then, feeling slightly guilty, she cleared her throat. "Listen, maybe you should try to keep your mouth shut about being a famous blitzer and stuff around the other people here. And… maybe you shouldn't go around telling people where you're from, too. The Zanarkand they know isn't exactly the same Zanarkand you come from anyway."

"You know I'm from Zanarkand!" Jecht repeated, eyes lighting up. "Man, I thought I was goin' crazy here! So you believe me then?" he asked eagerly.

I'm digging a hole, I just know it. What to say, what to say… "I… uh… I've seen you blitz before. On… spheres. Yeah, that's it, spheres! I've seen spheres of you blitzing! So, umm… yeah. I believe you. But I bet no one else will! 'Cause... they haven't seen the, uh, the spheres."

"My games were always prime time material! Whadda ya mean nobody's seen 'em?" Jecht sputtered.

"They broke!" Rikku said with a nervous laugh.

"What broke?" Jecht asked, looking even more upset.

"Boy, you really are dense! The spheres of you playing Blitzball," Rikku replied, exasperated.

"Well, what the hell are spheres?" Jecht threw his hands up in frustration.

Rikku sighed and sat back. "You really are from another world," she murmured quietly. Then, brightening, she snapped her fingers. "Here, I'll show you!" She reached into her hair and felt around underneath her bandana.

"Eh?" Jecht said, watching Rikku as she spilled her braids out of their messy holder and sorted through them. "What're ya doin' now?"

"Hah, they didn't get them all," Rikku cheered, flashing Jecht a victory sign as she unwound a glowing blue orb from one of her braids. She hadn't even remembered hiding away her precious dresspheres while she was running through the alley; sometimes she was grateful that her thieving fingers could work on autopilot even if her mind was miles away. "Sometimes it's good to have big hair, remember that!" she told Jecht smugly, giving the sphere a cursory examination.

"Huh. Maybe if you like the bird nest look," Jecht replied with a grin, causing Rikku to scowl and stick her tongue out at him.

"Like you're one to talk, Mr. I-Need-Grooming-Badly! For your information, this bird's nest is the reason I can show you what a sphere is at all, so you better be thankful!" Rikku huffed. She held her personal thief dressphere; the one she had recorded of filching tools out from under her father's nose. She kept it more as a keepsake than anything else, since she didn't need the augmentation of the sphere to bolster her pick-pocketing abilities; thieving was Rikku's favourite pastime, after all. "This is a sphere. You can use it to record stuff that happens, and play it back later if you want to remember," Rikku explained patiently.

"Huh, kind of like a camera then?" Jecht asked, eyeing the sphere curiously.

"Yeah, we can make cameras out of these too, though that doesn't happen much outside of Luca..." Jecht's eyes were glazing over as she babbled, and Rikku bit her lip and reconsidered her generosity. Father's on this. And if Jecht's here, then maybe uncle Braska…

"Oi!" Jecht said impatiently, interrupting her. "I thought you were gonna show me this sphere thing!"

"Ahh," Rikku said, laughing a little too loudly as she discretely deleted the recording on the sphere. "Well… umm, I forgot that this one is blank. So there's nothing to show you here yet!"

Jecht only snorted and sat back with a look of disbelief. "Man, you are an airhead. Maybe they were right, you really are crazy," he grunted. "Why use spheres when you could just grab a camera anyway? It's stupid," he grumbled to himself.

Rikku scowled at Jecht and held her sphere up defiantly. "Spheres are cameras, you idiot! I'm not lying, and I'll prove it! I'll make a recording of you right now and we'll see who's the stupid one, huh!" She fumbled with the sphere controls, steaming.

Jecht only rolled his eyes and leaned back against the wall with a yawn. "Sure, whatever. Crazy bitch," he muttered under his breath.

"Ooh, you!" Rikku sputtered, holding the sphere up and giving him her best death glare as she started recording. Before she could add a pithy insult, however, the opening door caught their attention. A heavily armoured prison guard stepped in. He strode into the narrow room and stopped in front of her cell, turning sharply and standing at attention.

Hmm… somebody important must be visiting, Rikku thought to herself, craning her neck forward and trying to see who it was. And then time itself stopped.

He was young, so young it almost hurt to look at him; she hadn't realized how ruthlessly handsome he would be with his dark hair worn long and two whole, burning eyes. Even as a young man he bore the same stern expression, his lips pressed together tightly and his eyebrows lowered in a permanent scowl, as though he was continuously annoyed by his surroundings. The most breathtaking thing of all, however, was his face. For the first time Rikku saw him without the mask of his dark glasses or the high cowl. And he was more beautiful than she had ever dreamed. Unconsciously, her hand reached out through the bars to try and touch him, to see if he was real, but he brushed past her without even acknowledging her presence. He stopped in front of the guard and glowered at him.

"Is this how you show respect to a Summoner and his Guardian?" Auron said curtly, and Rikku almost dropped the sphere.

It's him, it's really him… I'd know that voice anywhere! She gaped soundlessly at Auron, still seated on the floor of her cell, and flushed a deep red as he caught sight of her and met her eyes. Then his gaze flickered to the sphere in her hands and his scowl deepened.

"And what in Yevon's name is that prisoner doing with a –"

Rikku gasped and shook her head wildly at Auron. Please-please-please don't say anything! She panicked, silently pleading with him. If she really was stuck in the past, she had a vague idea of what would happen if the Bevelle guards caught a prisoner with contraband material… particularly an Al Bhed prisoner.

Auron's lips twisted slightly, but he turned his attention back up to the smirking guard and crossed his arms. "You will bow when Lord Braska enters."

"He's not a Summoner yet, sir. Give me one good reason I should do anything for that Al Bhed lover," the guard said with a sneer.

Rikku flinched at the tone of the guard's voice, looking down into her sphere. Ouch… She had almost forgotten what it felt like to be so hated by everyone else; a lance of pain zipped through her chest. Then she pressed her lips together into a tight line. Never let them see you squirm! she told herself strictly. Yeah, that's me… cool as a cucumber, Rikku. Be like Auron. Smooth. Cool. You can set this jerk's pants on fire later, right?

Auron's cold voice cut across her musing; she could have sworn the room temperature dropped several degrees from his tone alone. "Conscious or not, you will bow. Do I make myself clear?" He fingered the hilt of his sword and gave the guard a meaningful look.

The guard paled and swallowed loudly before nodding. "Y-yes, sir…"

"Auron, that's enough." Rikku snapped her head towards the door and almost dropped the sphere a second time. The tall man who stepped into the room behind him was unmistakable. He smiled apologetically, shaking out his long robes. "You'll have to excuse him. Guardians can be quite intimidating at times, can't they?"

"Yes, sir!" the guard replied sharply, pulling his hands together respectfully and giving Braska a low bow. "The prisoner you wanted to see, sir!" he added, clicking his heels and pointing at Jecht.

Braska looked over the guard's shoulder and down at Rikku. Startlingly blue eyes regarded her from a gentle face; he looks just like Yunie! Rikku realized with a shock. He lifted his eyebrow as he took in the sphere, and then, to her surprise, gave her a conspiratorial wink. Then Braska turned and faced Jecht, who was watching the entire display with a look of bored amusement.

"You ladies done prancin' around now?" Jecht sneered, propping an arm up on his leg. "Who are you anyway?"

Braska ignored the jibe and stepped closer to Jecht's cell, tilting his head curiously. "You are the one they call Jecht, the man from Zanarkand, are you not?"

Jecht eyed Braska suspiciously, drumming his fingers on his knee. He shot a stealthy glance over towards Rikku, and she realized belatedly that her well-meant advice might actually be backfiring. Grinning, she tried to give Jecht an encouraging nod and froze when she noticed Auron's suspicious glare.

Jecht sighed loudly and shrugged. "What of it?" he said carelessly.

Auron was at Braska's side before he could add in another word. "Watch your tongue, knave!" he ground out harshly, but held back when Braska shot him a warning glance.

"My apologies. I am Braska, a Summoner." He paused, waiting for Jecht's reaction, but the Blitzball player only yawned. Auron twitched noticeably. Braska let a small half-smile play across his face and dropped his head. "Well… perhaps you'd be more interested in knowing that I've come to take you from this place."

That got Jecht's attention; he stood up quickly and approached the bars of the cell, giving Braska a frank appraisal. "Sounds sweet. What's the catch?" He stretched lazily and folded his arms over his head.

Braska only laughed in response, shrugging his shoulders. "That easy to see, was it? I soon leave on a Pilgrimage." Braska paused, expecting a response, and when none was forthcoming, he shook his head and tried again. "... to Zanarkand?"

Jecht's arms dropped at the same time that his eyes lit up with boyish hope, another trait Tidus had unknowingly inherited. "Seriously?" he asked.

Braska nodded at him and smiled. "I would like you to join us. It will be a dangerous trip. Yet, if we do reach Zanarkand..." He paused and closed his eyes, his shoulders bowing forward slightly. "… my prayers will be answered."

The sphere trembled in Rikku's hands. How could you pray for that, uncle Braska? Your hope is a lie! But she kept silent.

"Huh?" Jecht mumbled, staring at Braska through the bars of the cell in confusion.

"Oh…" The darkness lifted away from Braska as quickly as it had settled, and he gave Jecht an encouraging smile. "And you will be able to go home, we think. What say you?"

Jecht shrugged, a wide grin slipping over his face. "Great! Let's go!"

Both Auron and Braska did a double take at Jecht's easy acceptance of the task. "So quick?" Braska asked with an air of disbelief. "Even Auron didn't -"

"Don't compare me with that drunken fool," Auron cut in immediately with disgust.

"I ain't the one with a jug of hooch tied to my hip," Jecht replied with a smirk, unruffled by Auron's fierce glare.

Braska intervened quickly when he saw Auron's jaw clench. "Then it's settled," he said, pushing Auron away from the bars.

"But I must protest!" Auron sputtered, staring at Braska in consternation. "This drunkard, a Guardian?" The disgust in his voice was evident, and Jecht bristled.

"You want to step in here and say that?" He cracked his neck and pounded one large fist into the other, meeting Auron's glare steadily.

"Hmm," Braska said, a small smile forming over his lips. "There aren't many people who can meet Auron's gaze without flinching," he said to Jecht, surprising the large man. "I think you'll make a fine Guardian." Then he turned to Auron and put a calming hand on his shoulder. "What does it matter anyway, Auron? No one truly believes that I, a fallen Summoner wed to an Al Bhed could possibly defeat Sin. This is what they say. No one expects us to succeed."

"Braska..." Auron protested immediately, but Braska only shook his head and tightened his grip.

"Let's show them they're wrong. A fallen Summoner, a man from Zanarkand ... and a warrior monk, doomed to obscurity for refusing the hand of the priest's daughter. What delightful irony it would be if we defeated Sin!"

Rikku felt her eyes bug out as she stared at Auron. His face was flushed, probably with embarrassment, but also with anger at Braska's frank appraisal of their reputation. That wasn't what fascinated her, though. Auron had a girlfriend? She could barely process the thought; the Auron she knew and romance were polar opposites. But what if it was true? A sharp prick of jealousy stung her. Which was followed by an even sharper jolt of disappointment. But if what uncle Braska says is true, then he shut her down faster than Gippal could lift a skirt. And then the disappointment slowly changed into humor, and she barely had time to shut down the sphere and tuck it away in her hair before her giggles broke out audibly.

Geez … he really was born with a stick up his butt! I wonder what he'd say if he could see me now! She realized that Auron was looking at her, and he could see her right then, only this Auron didn't know her at all. And that was the funniest thing of all. "D-delightful … irony!" she managed to gasp out, the laughter escaping her in painful, sobbing breaths as she doubled over, feeling the scab on her shoulder stretch and break open once again.

"Silence, you Al Bhed dog!" the guard yelled, turning towards her and kicking the bars of her cage with his heavily booted foot. Rikku only held her stomach and laughed harder.

Jecht peered at them from his cell uncertainly, then rattled the bars of his own cage with a grimace. "Stop gabbin' and get me outta here! Her type of crazy might be catchin'," he grumbled.

Braska ignored him and walked over to Rikku's cage, kneeling by her side and studying her through the bars. The guard moved to pull him away, but Auron stopped him with a look before he could disturb the would-be Summoner.

"Now how did an Al Bhed girl end up lost in the heart of Bevelle?" he asked her gently. A frown touched his face as he saw the slow trickle of blood leaking from her shoulder, and a brief flash of anger flitted across his features. "She is injured. Why hasn't the wound been tended to yet?" he asked, standing up and fixing the guard with a stern look.

"But sir… she's just an Al Bhed!" the guard replied.

"She's a human being, and she deserves to be treated as one," Braska said curtly. He stared at the guard, who fidgeted slightly, then straightened up.

"She attacked Maester Mika," he said defensively.

Rikku, who had finally managed to quell the rabid laughter that was leaking from her mouth, leapt to her feet and then winced painfully. "I so did not!" she yelled. "That stupid Kelk Ronso is the one who attacked me! I was just trying to get inside the temple, but you guys got in my way!"

The guard spun around angrily, hefting his weapon. "Blasphemer! An Al Bhed, in a temple of Yevon! You should be put to death for this insolence!"

"Silence!" Braska said, his voice rising slightly. He was a quiet, unassuming man, soft spoken and gentle; however, there was something about his bearing that commanded respect from others. Usually it was a quiet something; when he felt strongly enough to raise his voice that power came blazing out, though, cowing others who stood in his presence.

His will, Rikku thought. Just like Yunie. That's why he can beat Sin. Braska hadn't moved, but his presence seemed to fill the room. He turned and looked at her with a thoughtful expression. "Why did you want to enter the temple?" he asked her softly. "You are Al Bhed." She knew what he didn't voice; you hate the temples. You hate the Fayth. You hate the Summoners… you hate people like me.

Rikku shook her head wildly. "It's not like that! I… I just wanted to see the Fayth," she mumbled, looking down at her boots. What am I supposed to say? she wondered. I wanted to force Bahamut out of his statue and get him to send me back home, so I wouldn't have to watch the three of you die for nothing? Then she looked up with a glint in her eye. "I just wanted to ask them why."

Braska studied her for a moment, and then gave her a slow nod. "Unusual," he said finally. "Do I know you? You remind me of someone…" he added, squinting at her.

"Y-you know this criminal?" the guard piped up, his face paling. He grew quiet very quickly as Auron tapped the hilt of his sword deliberately.

"N-no! We've never met! Really! I'm nobody special!" Rikku babbled, smiling brightly and wringing her hands. She started to rock on the balls of her feet and then stopped with a wince as the wound at her shoulder pulled even more. "Owwie…" she hissed quietly.

"Hmm," Braska said thoughtfully, rubbing his chin.

" 'ey! You should take her too!" Jecht yelled suddenly, leaning against the bars of his cage. "She knows all about my Zanarkand. Said she saw it on a sphere or something!" Then he smiled broadly. " 'Sides, it's never wrong to bring a babe along!"

"Babe?" Rikku spluttered, flushing red with disgust. Jecht, observant as he was, mistook her reaction for embarrassment.

"Ah, don't tell me you're shy, not when you're wearin' that getup!" he laughed.

Rikku's face nearly turned purple and she exploded in anger. "You're a dirty old man!" she railed, shaking her fist against the bar. "For the last time, I am so not one of your stupid Blitzball fans! And aren't you supposed to be married or something?" she added, planting her hands on her hips. Then she blanched as Jecht grew quiet and stared at her intently.

"Now how would you know that unless you really have heard of me," he wondered out loud, fixing her under his baleful glare.

"Oopsie..." Rikku mumbled, feeling the others turn to her with questioning stares.

"Braska, this is a bad idea," Auron interjected, rubbing at his temples. "First this drunkard, and now an Al Bhed -" he ignored the glare the others shot at him and continued brusquely. "- and it seems they know each other, too. I must strongly protest this, my lord! We don't know what mischief they might be planning."

Rikku balled her fists together and glared at Auron, all of her tender thoughts at his breathtaking younger appearance flying out the window. Well, almost all thoughts; he still had killer lips, especially when they were pursed together so angrily. Focus, Rikku! She fixed her gaze somewhat higher on Auron's face.

"What I'm planning? Hello? What about what you and Braska are planning, huh? You just want him to make this Pilgrimage so he can save the rest of us!" she spat out. "Look me in the eye and tell me how anything I can cook up could be worse than that!"

Auron's jaw clenched and he glared back at her but said nothing. Rikku met his stare boldly, refusing to be cowed by his fierce expression. No way, not this time buster! She let out a small 'humpf' of satisfaction as Auron broke off the staring contest first, flushing angrily.

"Oh," Braska said, turning to Rikku and giving her an appreciative smile. "I hadn't thought anyone else could do that to Auron, and here it's happened twice in the space of a few minutes. I think that's a sign," he said with a small chuckle.

"Well?" Jecht said impatiently, baffled by the entire exchange. "So is she comin' with us or what?"

The smile remained on Braska's face as he regarded Rikku. "Are you interested?" he asked her. "It's better than staying here, I think. But ultimately, it is your choice."

Rikku looked at Braska. Is it? I don't want to make another Pilgrimage… I wanted that time to be over forever. She winced and thought of Bahamut; if the only way back to her time was through the Fayth, then she didn't have much of a choice after all.

"Yeah," she said reluctantly. "I'll go with you, Lord Braska."

"Then it's settled," Braska said reasonably. "Welcome to the group."

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

3: Debunking A Legend

Unfortunately for Rikku, becoming one of Braska's Guardians wasn't quite as easy as simply accepting his verbal offer. She sat on the floor of her tiny cell and watched with boredom as Braska tried unsuccessfully to negotiate her release with the guard. "Hey, can I at least get a napkin here or something?" she asked, making a disgusted face as she swiped at the blood dribbling down her back. "Icky." She cleaned her fingers on the hem of her skirt.

"Silence!" the guard yelled at her.

"Why?" Rikku replied snottily. "Prisoners should be seen and not heard? Well tough, you guys are the ones who shot me, so deal!"

"Insolent little…"

"OWW OWW OWW OWW OWW!" Rikku shouted back at him. Then she gave the guard a fake smile. "I'll shut up if you let me out of here," she added sweetly.

"Miss, maybe you should stop trying to help," Braska mumbled. "Excuse me," he added, louder, bringing the guard's attention back to their argument. "I don't see what the problem is."

"The problem is that you want to make a Summoner's party out of a band of criminals!" the guard sputtered, scowling at Braska. "Can't you be satisfied with just one?" He gestured towards Jecht, who was now freed and standing behind them.

" 'ey, who are you callin' a criminal?" Jecht shot back, crossing his arms and glowering at the man.

"He might not call you a criminal if you would stop acting like one," Auron said sharply.

"Will you all please calm down?" Braska turned around and glanced at the two men behind him. Sighing, he faced forward and addressed the guard who had planted himself in front of Rikku's cell. "We will vouch for her. You have my word that she will cause no further trouble while she is in Bevelle."

"Your word means nothing," the guard said. "Al Bhed lovers can't be trusted!"

"You," Auron grunted, narrowing his eyes and reaching for his sword.

"Threaten me with violence all you want!" the guard replied shrilly, backing several paces away from the fuming Guardian. "I'd rather be beaten for doing my job than executed for allowing the release of an Al Bhed assassin!"

"Will somebody please tell me who Al is?" Jecht threw his hands into the air.

These are the guys who defeated Sin? Rikku gawked at their antics. Boy, you sure wouldn't know it from looking at them. Then the guard's words filtered through and she was struck by a sudden wave of panic. "Wait a minute, wait wait wait!" she screeched, springing to her feet. "What assassin? I'm not an assassin!" Besides, you can't assassinate someone who's already dead, she thought ruefully.

"The Maesters will determine what happens to your worthless hide!" the guard answered, and Rikku paled.

"No WAY! Get me out of here!" She grabbed onto the bars and fixed Braska with a desperate stare. "I'm too young and beautiful to die in Bevelle! I'm a free spirit, not a killer! I love sand and sun and peace and freedom and… and… I'm allergic to firing squads! Help!"

"There's no help for you, girl. You're going to hang," the guard sneered.

"No one is going to hang!" Braska interrupted, looking upset. "If you would only listen -"

"I say we pound him and take the keys," Jecht offered helpfully, cracking his knuckles.

Rikku shrieked again, rattling the bars of her cage. "This story sucks! If I live through this I'm gonna kill that Fayth myself!"

"You see!" the guard yelled, swinging his rifle towards Rikku.

Auron, who had remained suspiciously silent up to that point, finally reacted. More accurately, Rikku realized, she watched his temper boil over and get the better of him. Rikku knew that look on his face. She'd been the cause of it more than once during Yuna's Pilgrimage. Uh-oh… when Auron's patience breaks something else usually does too. She backed away from the bars cautiously.

"Whoa," Jecht yelled, leaping out of Auron's path.

Auron swiftly strode past him and drew his massive sword. He slammed it down in front of the cowering guard, slicing through the heavy iron barrel of the outstretched rifle as though it was made out of paper. A tense hush descended over the group, punctuated by the clanking of the severed metal barrel as it rolled across the stone floor.

"Shut up," Auron said tersely, taking a moment to straighten and glare at all of them before hefting the sword over his shoulder. "Look after Jecht," he told Braska. "I'll see to the girl myself. We'll meet you outside."

"What? Auron's allowed to give that sissy a poundin' but I'm not?" Jecht continued to grumble even as Braska hooked a hand around his elbow and dragged him towards the door.

"I've found that it's best not to question Auron's methods when he gets into one of his moods…" Braska murmured discreetly, exiting the room.

"Hnn," Auron said, pinning the trembling guard under his stare. He tapped his fingers on the hilt of his sword and frowned expectantly. "Either you can open it up, or I can."

"Y-yes, sir!" the guard said, tripping over himself as he fumbled for the key to Rikku's cell. He managed to swing the door open but Rikku held back, fidgeting as Auron's glare fixed on her.

"Well?" he asked her impatiently. "Are you coming or not?"

"Sheathe that thing first, then we'll talk," Rikku squeaked, hunching over under his scrutiny and wincing as the motion tore even more at the scabbed wound on her shoulder.

Auron narrowed his eyes at her but put the sword away. "Fine. Now come out before you hurt yourself even more," he told her with irritation. While the lack of a wielded weapon did cut down on his intimidation factor slightly, it regrettably had the same effect on the pale-faced guard, who gathered enough courage to protest when Rikku stepped out of her cell.

"M-my superiors will hear of this!" he whimpered, scrambling to his feet and backing away.

"Good," Auron said brusquely. "Tell Kinoc we'll meet him in his office shortly."

The door slammed shut behind the nervous guard, and Rikku was left alone at Auron's side. She realized with a start that she'd grown taller since the last time she saw him; she no longer had to look up quite as much to see his face. The bigger shock was being able to see his smooth, unmarred features at all, though. "Umm… thanks, I think?" she told him with an uncertain smile.

Auron's lips twisted in a grimace, and he grabbed her elbow roughly. "Make no mistake. I do this for Lord Braska, not you."

"Oww! What's the big idea? Leggo!" Rikku protested as he began to drag her towards the door. "Hey, hey - oww - stop it! I'll follow you, okay? You don't have to pull me around like a chocobo!"

Auron stopped abruptly and twisted towards her, keeping his vice-like grip on her forearm. He leaned down and glared at her, his gaze cold and hard, and when he spoke his tone was clipped. "You are a prisoner of Bevelle and a potential Al Bhed assassin. Against my better judgment, I am about to see to your release and entrust you with the privileged status of a Guardian. Therefore, I am directly responsible for your actions from now on." His grip tightened painfully and Rikku winced. "Don't think for an instant that I condone anything you've said or done. If it were up to me, I wouldn't let you hang." He paused and loosened his grip on her arm. "I'd have cut you down on sight."

"Ouch," Rikku said quietly, allowing Auron to pull her out of the room with a small pout. "But -"

"Conversation isn't necessary," Auron replied without even bothering to look at her, leading them swiftly through the complex maze of hallways in the large building.

"You don't have to be so rude, you know!" Rikku blurted out. "I'm not an assassin!"

"Of course," Auron grunted. "Just another innocent prisoner, then?"

"That's right!" Rikku finally managed to twist her arm out of Auron's grasp. He stopped to look at her but she gave him a shrug. "Lead the way! I'll be good, promise!"

"Fine," he said after a moment, continuing down the hall. Rikku liked to think he let her go free because he trusted that she wouldn't do anything foolish; she could tell by the way his palm lingered near the hilt of his sword that he was actually considering it a good excuse to smite her if she made one false move, though. Swallowing loudly, she flashed him a flustered smile. Geez, he's such a hardass! Maybe age does mellow you out some. "So…" she said nervously. "You're Auron, right? Don'tcha wanna know who I am?"

"No," he said curtly.

Rikku scowled. "C'mon, aren't you even the tiniest little bit curious?" She pouted cutely, trying to catch his attention. The pout disappeared when he stopped and glared at her frostily; it wasn't the kind of attention she'd been hoping for.

He regarded her for a moment, and then spoke. "You are Al Bhed." It was all he said, but it was all he had to say.

Rikku felt her face grow slack when she heard those words. This is a worse nightmare than I thought. Sir Auron isn't like this! He treats everyone badly, not just the Al Bhed! As she looked at him, however, she realized that he wasn't the Auron she'd come to know during Yuna's Pilgrimage. This Auron was younger, angrier, and still very much a proud Warrior Monk.

He's one of them! she thought with a chill. He's a Yevonite! Unconsciously she took a step back from him, suddenly repulsed by his presence; his familiar features masked a stranger who she didn't know and couldn't trust, and it left her feeling cold and angry. That she still could recognize him seemed like the worst joke of all; this Auron was a mockery of the man she thought she loved.

He noticed her sudden change of posture and gave her a puzzled look. Of course, Rikku thought bitterly. Al Bhed aren't accepted as people yet in this Spira. I should really know better than to be surprised by his attitude. "Sorry," she told him haughtily, breaking away from his gaze. "I just thought you might be curious. My mistake. Please, go right on calling me whatever you want. In fact, why don't you add in a few more nouns to spice it up a little? Infidel, maybe, or scum if that's too hard. Al Bhed scum. Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?"

Auron blinked in surprise and frowned at her. "I -" He hesitated, and when it became apparent that he wasn't going to apologize Rikku's contempt swelled to fill the uncomfortable pause.

"Don't hurt yourself trying too hard there," Rikku snipped, crossing her arms and wincing. "Can we at least save the argument until when we're out of this hole?"

Auron grunted and turned on his heel, continuing down the hallway. Rikku followed him sullenly, glaring daggers into the back of his red overcoat. He remained silent, but the slant of his shoulders was stiff with tension and Rikku ground her teeth together. "You know, your Lord Braska married an Al Bhed," she finally said, unable to keep herself silent. Auron chose not to respond, and Rikku smirked at his back. "Guess you're gonna have to watch what you say around him, seeing as how you're so concerned with the proper treatment of a Summoner." Auron ignored her needling and Rikku wondered if the black clouds boiling over her head might be visible. "Yevonite," she spat out venomously.

That stopped him abruptly and she almost smashed her nose into his back. She jumped away when he twisted his head around, giving her an angry glare. "I suppose you are proud of your own people's reception of Lord Braska, then. We do have you to thank for driving him to choose the Summoner's path, after all."

Rikku's mouth flopped open and then snapped shut, and she dropped her head shamefully. It was true; she vaguely remembered hearing of the controversy that had swirled around her father from Keyakku. Cid had exiled his own sister for marrying a priest of Yevon, and they lost contact directly afterwards. Her aunt died when Sin attacked the ship on her first return trip to Bikanel; it happened before anything could be smoothed over, and a large part of both Cid and Braska had left with her. I guess we Al Bhed weren't any better back then either, she thought guiltily. The sound of Auron's receding footsteps broke through her musing, and she jogged down the hall to catch up with him.

"Hey," Rikku said as she pulled up alongside him. "Umm… sorry," she mumbled, staring at the floor. Auron's pace didn't slack, and she felt a small tickle of anger. "… since someone has to be the bigger person here," she sniffed insolently.

"If you were an assassin," Auron said suddenly, looking straight ahead, "… then your strategy was brilliant. If not for the Ronso you might have succeeded."

Rikku slid her eyes sideways and looked at him. Was that supposed to be some kind of a compliment? Wait, I'm not an assassin! She scowled at him. "I wasn't trying to kill Maester Mika," she repeated firmly.

"Then you're an even greater fool than I suspected," he finished. His tone was not as harsh, however, and Rikku still felt confused. Too many mixed signals, she thought, her head spinning as she tried to match up her knowledge of Auron with the surprisingly rude young man walking beside her. Was he apologizing? Was he insulting her? She couldn't tell.

I guess it's better if he thinks I'm a clueless idiot rather than a deadly assassin. Hey, wait-a-minute! "Jerk," she mumbled under her breath.

Auron grunted, pausing as they reached a floating lift and waiting for her to board first. When the lift ascended, he turned and gave her one of his looks. Rikku squirmed uncomfortably; she knew those looks. He usually used those looks when he was chewing over some issue he didn't want to discuss out loud. Like, 'There is no final aeon,' or 'By the way, I'm dead,' or even 'I am NOT going to spend another night sharing a tent with Wakka.'

"What?" Rikku finally blurted out.

"How did you manage to smuggle a sphere into the cell?" he asked her. He let his eyes drop over her scant bikini in a brief but calculating appraisal, causing her to blush furiously before he lifted them back to her face. "You don't have a lot of places to hide one," he noted wryly.

Rikku crossed her arms over her chest and glared at Auron. "I hid them in my hair, alright, so you can stop thinking whatever dirty thoughts I bet you just had! Sheesh, you're as bad as Jecht!"

That wiped the smirk off of Auron's face faster than a stampeding chocobo could have. "Your hair," he repeated, his eyes landing on the mop of spikes and braids flopping out from her bandana.

"Yep," Rikku grinned, reaching up underneath the bandana and feeling around until she found another one of her spheres. "Ouch," she winced as she carefully untangled it and pulled it free. "See? Pretty cool, huh," she boasted.

"Disgusting," Auron mumbled under his breath. "I don't see how you can stand not grooming yourself."

Rikku's mouth dropped open and then she glared at Auron. "Hey! I comb it... sometimes," she muttered, sulking as she fiddled with the sphere. "Besides, I like the natural look!"

"Stop playing with that," Auron interrupted her uncomfortably, glaring at the sphere in her hands.

Rikku jumped at his harsh tone and looked at the sphere curiously, then back at Auron. She drew her eyebrows together and pursed her lips. "Why? It's just a sphere."

Auron stiffened and turned away from her, folding his arms across his chest. The elevator came to a stop and he stepped out quickly and waited for her by the door, ignoring her questioning glance.

"No really, why?" Rikku piped up when she was at his side once more. "Everybody uses spheres. Even Yevon says they're a-okay!" Ah-ha, she thought as she noticed Auron tense. "Oh, I get it," she sang, bringing the sphere up and poking around the controls, delighting in the discomfort that registered on his face. "You think they're part of that whole forbidden machina deal, don'tcha!"

"I don't approve of them," Auron grumbled. He turned his head and flinched when he realized Rikku was filming him, then scowled at her darkly. "Get that thing away from me!" he growled, his voice rising.

"Relax! This is perfectly harmless!" Rikku admonished, holding the sphere even closer and grinning as he jerked backwards. "You really need to lighten up some. It's not gonna suck out your soul or anything. See? You're fine!"

"Stop that. We're here," Auron grit out, pausing before a huge set of elaborately painted doors.

"Sure thing, chief!" Rikku agreed, filing away the information for future usage. Note to self – death by Auron can be escaped through clever use of paranoid machina superstitions. The doors swung open, and Rikku closed her palm over most of the sphere, surreptitiously keeping it recording.

"Auron," a loud voice greeted them, "Bringing in trouble again I see?"

Kinoc! Rikku jumped, her mouth falling open. It was definitely him, though she wouldn't have believed it. His chin was covered with a neatly trimmed beard and a fancy metal helmet obscured almost his entire face save for his eyes. Most shockingly, however, was his lack of girth. Wow… he could almost pass for someone good-looking, Rikku thought with amazement, ogling him in shock.

"I trust you've heard already," Auron responded with a note of amusement. Rikku shot a quick look of surprise at her stoic companion; he seemed to let his guard down around Kinoc, the frown on his face easing slightly. "Braska wants to make this one a Guardian," he said, making an off-handed gesture towards Rikku.

Kinoc sighed and shook his head, pacing around the room. "I know we're friends, Auron, but this is going to take more than just a little string-pulling. She tried to assassinate Mika after all."

"Hey!" Rikku piped up in annoyance. "I'm right over here!" Maybe he looks better, but he's still the same rotten person on the inside, she thought as Kinoc gave her a depreciatory glance and then continued to ignore her.

"Well?" he asked Auron expectantly.

Auron sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "… she's not an assassin, Wen. Trust me."

"Huh, you mean you believe me?" Rikku gaped, her mouth dropping open again.

"She managed to down one of the guards without a weapon, disabled four others with their own bomb and broke through the inner line, and if it hadn't been for Kelk she might have even reached Mika. Do you know how many years people have been trying to do just that unsuccessfully?" Kinoc retorted. He snorted and shook his head. "And now you expect me to believe that this Al Bhed girl, acting completely on her own of course, just got lucky?"

"Hey! Luck is my middle name!" Rikku shouted, stomping her foot. She noticed Auron glaring at her and fell quiet. Eh… maybe I shouldn't be trying so hard to convince him that I'm a danger, she thought with a feeble laugh. "I wasn't trying to get to Maester Mika!" Rikku repeated. "I just wanted to see the temple, that's all."

Kinoc finally turned and gave her a shrewd look. "An Al Bhed convert? What's next, machina in the temples?"

Rikku bit the inside of her cheek hard enough to draw blood. If only you knew… She glared hotly at Kinoc. He seemed to note her anger with amusement and took a step closer.

"Quite the fighting spirit this one has," he observed; the lewd tone of his voice made Rikku shiver and back away from him. She discreetly tried to position herself behind Auron's broad shoulders, feeling horribly exposed as she noticed Kinoc's eyes lingering over her body. "I have to admit, there is something to be said for that scandalous Al Bhed fashion," he laughed. "I suppose no one was really hurt in the attack. Perhaps we can come to an agreement after all." He took another step towards Rikku, his tone dripping with suggestion. He stopped when Auron shifted his weight subtly, drawing Kinoc's attention.

"Wen," Auron interrupted curtly. "Business."

The other man laughed and shook his head in amusement. "Always the straight arrow, weren't you Auron? You should learn to relax and enjoy the finer things in life."

"I'm a Guardian now. I take my vows seriously," Auron told him. The temperature in the room seemed to drop a few degrees.

"Yes? Well celibacy isn't one of them, my friend," Kinoc replied, letting his eyes drift towards Rikku again.

"I have no time or interest for Al Bhed women. If you knew what was good for your career, neither would you." Though Auron's tone was insulting, Rikku couldn't have been happier about his timely intervention. Better a hard-ass Auron getting in Kinoc's way than no Auron at all.

Kinoc stopped and gave Auron a puzzled glance. "Fine, you win," Kinoc finally sighed, stepping over towards his desk and sorting through a stack of papers. Finding what he was looking for, he grabbed a quill and scribbled across it. "This is the last time I can do this for you, Auron. We may be friends, but as you said…" He signed the paper with a flourish. "I have to start thinking about what's good for my own career." Blotting the parchment, he rolled it up and handed it to Auron. "Full release forms and a formal recognition of Braska's request. And, should you successfully pass through the Cloister of Trials, you'll have two days to leave Bevelle, no longer."

Auron gave the other man a curt nod and tucked the papers away inside of his coat. "Thanks for everything, Kinoc."

Kinoc smiled wryly and returned the nod. "I know I don't need to tell you this, but guard Lord Braska well."

The tension in Auron's frame eased slightly, and he offered a rare smile for his friend. "That I will. And you'll be busy, too." He looked over Kinoc, noting the crest on his helmet, and smirked. "I heard they made you second-in-command."

The smile fled from Kinoc's face as he turned away from them and dropped his gaze to the floor. "Auron… you know that promotion was meant for you. You were always the better one, even until the end."

Once again, Rikku was caught by surprise, gaping at the man in front of her. Him, passing up a promotion? Our Auron might have ended up as a Maester of Yevon? She squinted and tried to imagine him as an older man, dressed in the finery of a Maester's robes. It wasn't working at all; his fierce scowl always seemed to rip apart the image before it could fully form.

Auron's low chuckle brought her back to the present, and Rikku's insides turned to jelly at the sound. He laughed! It's… it's… better than the Hymn! Better than machina! That's it! Mission time Rikku, make Auron laugh more!

"You make it sound as if I was going off to die or something," Auron continued, oblivious to the salivating girl behind him. "I will see you again."

"Yes," Kinoc replied with a tired smile. For an instant the trappings of his position fell away, and Rikku saw the shadow of a man who was kind and good-humored, patient enough to pierce through Auron's gruff exterior and loyal enough to earn his friendship.

He fell so far, Rikku thought with a touch of sadness. The brief exchange sobered her, and she worried her lower lip. Their parting reminded her strongly of the reluctant farewell she had bid to Yuna and Paine when they left the Gullwings. Will that be us one day? The sudden feeling of homesickness blindsided Rikku and she blinked furiously, trying to push away the telltale tears before either of the men could notice them. I think I'd even be happy to see Brother again right now, she thought miserably.

"Well then..." Auron said, squaring his shoulders.

Kinoc gave the other man a genuine smile, even if it was a little strained at the edges. "Going already?" He chuckled. "You will tell me about Zanarkand when you return, won't you?"

Auron only smirked. "Farewell," he said as he turned and herded Rikku out of Kinoc's office. He paused when the doors shut behind them and looked at Rikku, noticing the sphere still in her hand. "I thought I told you to shut that off," he grumbled, all traces of good humor leaving his countenance.

"Oh!" Rikku yelped, jumping and disabling the sphere. She tucked it away into her hair before he could grab it, giggling. "Well, you heard the man! Let's get out of here before they change their minds!"

Auron continued to regard her closely, and then shook his head. "We will speak of this later," he promised. "Follow me." And once again he took off, and Rikku had to scurry to keep up with his long strides.

"You could walk a little slower, you big meanie!" Rikku huffed as she caught up with him. "It's not like I know my way around here!" They stopped in front of another set of elevators and Rikku held her breath. Well, actually, this does look familiar… isn't this the hallway where we fought Baralai? She blinked and turned when she heard Auron clearing his throat, and noticed that he was waiting for her to step onto the lift. "Oh, uh, sorry…" she muttered, flushing. Great, Rikku. I bet he thinks you're a total space case now! "Why do you always wait for me to go first anyway?" Rikku asked. "I already told you I wasn't gonna try to run away!"

Auron cocked his head and his brow wrinkled in faint amusement. "The Al Bhed have no manners," he observed as he boarded the platform behind her.

"Well neither do you," Rikku shot back, sulking.

"Hnn," Auron replied, though his expression settled into something vaguely less cross than before. Not that that was saying much, Rikku noted. It was like observing that a grenade was slightly less explosive than a bomb. Both could still easily blow up in your face at the slightest provocation.

"So where are you taking me now?" Rikku asked cautiously, waiting as the lift came to a stop. A few uncomfortable seconds passed, before Auron let out a heavy sigh.

"This is our stop. Get off."

Rikku jumped off the lift and waited for him to follow. "You know, this would be a whole lot quicker if you'd just go first."

"Ladies first clearly does not apply here," he mumbled to himself as he strode down the hallway. "Kinoc granted you full release forms. First we collect your belongings. Then we leave."

Joy flooded through Rikku at his words, and she had to stop herself from leaping forward and hugging him in sheer relief. My gear! My potions, my daggers, my grid! "Holy machina, I thought they were goners!" she exclaimed out loud, twirling a fist in the air as she danced. Then she winced and put her arm down quickly. "Oww! The first thing I'm going to do when I get my stuff back is drink a potion!"

"Don't count on it," Auron told her as they stopped in front of another set of double doors. He pushed them open and stepped into the large room. Rikku's eyes widened as she took in the sight; it was obviously a storage and supply room of some sort. Countless rows of neatly labelled shelves stretched endlessly into distance, and a tall counter manned by several priests barricaded access to the equipment.

"Wowzer," Rikku mumbled in awe, her eyes sparkling. It was a thief's personal heaven; O'aka probably would have had a heart attack and died if he could have seen Bevelle's stock. "This is incredible!" she breathed, trying to absorb the gleaming weapons and rows of bottles, gems and pouches lining the shelves. Distantly she noticed that their presence was garnering stares from both the clerks as well as the guards who were lined up behind the counters to collect their rations. Rikku shrugged it off. Even a young Auron was intimidating enough to keep the questions at bay, and she was much too busy soaking in the impressive display of wealth to be bothered by the scrutiny. She stumbled over her own feet when Auron pulled her towards a corner of the room, making his way towards one of the shorter lines behind the counter.

"You think they might let us borrow some of this stuff?" Rikku whispered to him excitedly. "You know, for helping out on Braska's Pilgrimage?"

Auron winced and tightened his grip on her arm, and Rikku realized she had been unconsciously hopping from foot to foot in her eagerness. "Calm down," he growled at her. "You're making a scene. And no," he added as an afterthought.

"Why not?" Rikku whined, though she did manage to suppress most of her excitement behind a single eagerly tapping foot.

"Bevelle keeps a detailed record of their supplies," Auron explained to her with an air of strained patience. "If you take something, they will notice." He fixed her with a stern look and Rikku's foot paused. "If you take something, I will notice."

"Geez, fine," Rikku huffed, rolling her eyes. At least I have my own supplies, and I bet it's better than any of the junk those Yevonites keep here anyway, she thought with a satisfied smirk. The line moved forward, and she stepped up beside Auron and tried her best to look innocent as the priest behind the counter gave her a withering glare.

"Order?" he said skeptically, eyeing Rikku over the rim of his heavyset glasses. Auron handed him the rolled sheet of paper and after a brief perusal, he shuffled away from them. The clerk pulled a small box from one of the shelves. "Here you are," he said, sliding the box over the countertop.

"Gimmie gimmie gimmie!" Rikku cheered, pulling the box over before Auron could stop her and tearing the cover off. She peeked in, and then her face fell. "Hey! What gives? Where's my stuff?" She stared into the depths of the nearly-empty box. Her curved daggers were still there, neatly crossed, and over them her custom crafted belt was folded. Even without picking it up, however, Rikku could see that her pouches were completely empty. "My potions! My gem collection!" she noted with increasing concern, rooting through the rest of the box. She let out a small breath of relief as she noted that the garment grid was still hooked onto the belt; apparently whoever had sorted through her things had assumed it was simply an overwrought buckle of some sort. Everything else of value, however, was gone. "You even took my bracelets, you Yevonite bast-" her rapidly rising howl was silenced as a hand descended over her mouth and clamped it shut.

"Thank you," Auron told the priest, collecting the box and hauling Rikku away from the counter. He kept his iron grip around her until they were well outside of the room, drawing the stares and snickers of the other priests and guards who observed their awkward exit. Rikku struggled fiercely, too angry to play nice, but he was too strong for her to break free. She even opened her mouth and bit him, but he only grunted and tightened his hold. Finally, when they rounded the corner, he thrust her away from him with a soft curse. "I told you to calm down!" he growled at her.

"They stole my stuff!" Rikku balled her hands into fists and tried to stomp back towards the room. Auron moved quickly, blocking her path and shoving the now-crumpled box into her arms. "Get out of my way!" she yelled at him, her eyes glinting.

"Be thankful that you had that much returned to you at all," he told her. "Equip yourself so we can leave this place. Braska is waiting for us."

"But -" Rikku sputtered.

"No buts, no excuses and no more theatrics!" Auron roared, and Rikku shut her mouth.

Uh-oh, looks like he's mad again. Then her face dropped into a scowl that probably would have made him proud if it hadn't been aimed in his direction. Well I'm mad too! "That was my stuff! What right do they have to take it? I stole it fair and square!"

Rikku didn't think Auron could appear any more displeased than he already was, but somehow he managed to look even more put out than before. "You're a thief," he said with an air of disbelief. Then he laughed, but it wasn't the warm, friendly sound that he shared with Kinoc that made her insides curl and melt. This laugh was jagged and sharp, and it cut into her, making her feel like a messy grease stain on the pristine marble floors of the temple. "I knew you were trouble."

"So what if I'm a thief!" Rikku stomped her foot. "I spent a long time collecting all that stuff from fiends for your information! That wasn't exactly easy to do!"

Auron only walked past her, the hard smile that was still on his face looking more like a distorted grimace. "I don't believe this," he muttered under his breath.

"Hey! Hey, I'm not done talking to you yet!" Rikku scrambled after him as she strapped her daggers into the belt in her hand. "Maybe you don't give a crap about how I feel right now, but that was everything I had!" Auron didn't slow down, and in a burst of speed, Rikku scurried in front of him and planted herself in his path defiantly. "We have to go back and get my things!" she shouted.

"If your equipment is that important to you," Auron told her harshly as he came to a stop, "why don't you just go back upstairs and seduce Kinoc? I suppose he would be happy to help you for the right price."

Rikku recoiled. "What?" she gasped, her eyes going wide with shock. Oh, he so didn't just go there, she thought furiously. "Is that what you really think of me?"

"What else should I think?" Auron countered, gesturing at her dress, or lack thereof. "You come into the heart of Yevon touting your Al Bhed clothing and morals, and wonder that Bevelle is less than accommodating to your needs. Perhaps you can fool Braska, but you can't possibly expect me to believe you're that naïve."

Rikku clenched and unclenched her fists, looking at the ground in front of Auron's boots and willing herself to count backwards slowly. He's just being Auron, she hissed to herself. Somewhere in there is a good person, the Auron I know. The one who isn't a total asshole. Oh, screw it! "You're unbelievable!" she exploded, throwing her hands up into his face, though he managed to pull back before her fingers clipped his nose. "It's not just the machina, is it! You people pass judgment on us for every single little thing we do! The way we talk, the way we dress, the way we wear our hair!"

Rikku's voice was loud and shrill. With a curse, Auron glanced up and down the empty hallway before grabbing her and dragging her into one of the smaller alcoves. "You will be silent!" he hissed, anger simmering dangerously in his low tone. "We are still inside the palace of Bevelle, the seat of power for all Yevon. Is it your wish to get us both killed?"

"Stuff it!" Rikku shot back, glaring at him. "The way you Yevonites talk about us we may as well be dead! You sure seem to think it's a lot better than being ourselves!" Auron's grasp on her arms tightened, and she winced.

"Is that what you call these little displays? Your very own cultural identity? That's a pitiful excuse for Al Bhed depravity."

"That's exactly what it is!" Rikku hissed back, angrily shoving his hands off of her arms. "You wanna talk about depravity? Kinoc's the one who came onto me, you ass! Only someone as dense as a Yevonite could think I enjoyed it! And there's something else," she added, cutting him off before he could speak. "You have some nerve saying those things to me. You people are the ones who drove us out of Spira! You forced us to live on the crusty, ugly, forgotten edges of the world where no one else would go. But we didn't die out like you hoped! We survived, we even grew prosperous."

Rikku stuck out her finger and slammed it into Auron's armoured chest a few times. It bruised her unprotected digit more than anything else, but she wanted to drive the point home literally. "We learned to live in sun and wind and sand and water and you know what? We're good at it! We don't need your morals or your religion to make it out there! We're doing it on our own, and we can show as much skin as we want while we're at it because yes! We aren't like you and we're proud of it. So take your crappy assumptions and shove 'em, 'cause you don't know anything about us!" She finished her tirade with a pant, heaving and glaring at Auron.

Though he did look surprised by her outburst, his reaction wasn't as great as she had hoped it would be. Ideally, it involved him throwing himself at her ankles and begging for forgiveness. Through back massages. With his lips. She groaned and rubbed her fingers over her throbbing temples. "Forget it, okay, Auron? Let's just find Braska."

"I apologize for saying that."

Rikku whirled around and stared. "Huh?" she managed to say. He didn't repeat himself, and she flushed and played with the tassels of the belt in her hands. He's such a jerk… and a Yevonite… and an Auron. Shoot.

"Okay," she said. Then, shaking herself, she reached into her hair and began the arduous process of untangling the dresspheres that she had hidden beneath her blond locks. It was a task that was loud and required just enough attention to break the uncomfortable silence that she felt descending between them. "Owwie owwie ouch!" she hissed as the spheres tumbled into her hands, one after the other. She felt Auron's stare and parted the curtain of hair that had spilled over her face to look at him. "What?" she asked.

"… how many of those do you have in there?" he asked her incredulously.

"Just five!" Rikku huffed, sorting through the glowing blue orbs. She frowned and tucked the two newest recordings safely away; without Shinra to check over them first, she wasn't willing to test what "disasterrific" results they might produce on her garment grid. "Great… if I had known this was gonna happen, I would've brought the Machina Maw," she moaned, carefully slotting the remaining working dresspheres into her grid. Get real… if I had known I would be making another Pilgrimage to fight Sin, I'd have mugged Paine for The End, she thought to herself sourly.

"You have a belt buckle that holds spheres," she heard Auron observe with even more disbelief.

"So? This is the latest trend in Al Bhed fashion!" Rikku replied defensively. It was, technically speaking; he didn't need to know that the rest of Spira would have to wait another fifteen years before it picked up.

"Yevon help us all," Auron mumbled, and Rikku spun around to shake a fist at him with her retort. Then she yelped and fumbled with the belt; in her haste she had almost dropped it onto the floor. The unexpected shock of nearly smashing her spheres and grid made her knees grow weak and her mouth dry out, and brought the reality of her situation back with screaming clarity.

Holy machina, I almost broke my only real weapons here! she thought, gingerly checking the grid for damage. Gotta be more careful, Rikku, she told herself as she slipped the belt around her waist. Shinra won't be here to give you a replacement if you break something now. Steeling herself against the usual rush of energy, Rikku snapped the grid into place.

Pain. Pain? But why — P A I N !

"Augh," Rikku managed to choke out, arching against the wall in shock. The magic grids had always produced a slight reaction when being equipped, but the sudden blast of energy that poured into her when the belt clicked into place wasn't like anything she had ever felt before. It raced through her veins, white-hot like fire and needles; too much magic tumbling into her much too quickly, flooding her body like an electric current racing through water. She was sure the energy was going to come tearing out through her pores, ripping off her skin and melting her into the wall she leaned against. "Aah!" she wheezed again, unable to catch enough breath to properly scream out the agony that was rushing through her limbs. Black spots danced before her eyes.

Slowly the pain receded, leaving Rikku gasping and sobbing for breath. She noticed her hands had twisted into painful claws and that they were shaking uncontrollably, and she had to make a conscious effort to still them. Then she noticed that she wasn't standing upright; once again Auron had his arms around her, though this time he was holding her steady rather than dragging her away. Another tremor wracked her frame, and Rikku hunched over and shoved him off.

"Are you all right?" he asked her, surprise clearly splashed over his face.

"I - I don't know," Rikku stuttered, drawing in deep, slow breaths. "What just happened?"

"You had a seizure of some kind," he told her, touching her uninjured shoulder briefly. He hesitated for a moment before asking his next question. "Is this a normal occurrence?"

Rikku coughed and spat dryly, then straightened up and shot him an angry glare. "No, it's not. I know what you're thinking, and yes, I'm still fit enough to be a Guardian." Part of the reason she was angry was to cover the hurt, however; for a brief moment, when he had touched her shoulder, it had almost seemed as though he was concerned. That was, until he dispelled the illusion by asking his question. That's Auron for you. Always business first, see who you stepped on later.

Auron only gave her an appraising stare and nodded curtly. "The exit is that way," he said, gesturing down the hall before setting off by himself.

Rikku remained propped against the wall and glared at his back. "Thanks for being a gentleman!" she called out sarcastically, and heard him grunt in response. Great… everything's going just peachy right now. Thanks a lot, Bahamut. There was no time to dwell on the matter; if something was wrong with the garment grid, then she wasn't going to risk paralyzing herself again by taking it off, especially not in front of him. "This is not turning out like I thought it would at all," she sulked, gathering herself together and trailing after him.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

4: Rikkma's Arrival

When Rikku emerged from the confines of the palace, the first sight that greeted her was Braska and Jecht arguing. Though Braska was simply standing with his hands folded together, whatever he was saying was having an adverse effect on Jecht, who paced around the Summoner, occasionally punctuating the movement with sweeping gestures. Quickening her pace, Rikku hurried after Auron to greet the other two men.

"Hey, what's going on?" she asked as both Braska and Jecht turned and noticed their arrival.

"Oh, there you are. I was starting to wonder if Auron was losing his touch," Braska said with a small smile.

"I wasn't the cause of the delay," Auron replied. He didn't turn to face Rikku, so the effect of her pout as she stuck her tongue out was lost on him. It wasn't on the other two, however, and Braska hid his smile while Jecht grinned openly. Auron bristled but didn't take the bait. Instead, he nodded at Braska. "We should move. It isn't wise to remain here considering our present company."

"Hey!" Rikku and Jecht cried out at the same time, drawing more than a few stares from the people passing by.

"I see what you mean," Braska said to Auron with a slight nod. "Please, allow me to take you to my apartment so you two can get cleaned up." He eyed Rikku's shoulder and frowned. "And healed," he added.

"Oh, this is fine," Rikku said, wincing as she brushed at her shoulder, which was still slowly oozing blood. "I've had worse!"

"Fine for you, maybe," Jecht said, throwing his hands over his head as they strolled down the street. "The rest of us have to look at you bleedin' all over yourself! You should let Auron walk behind you, seems like the type of thing he'd enjoy seein'."

Rikku clenched her teeth and balled her fists up. "I'll bet he would," she mumbled under her breath. Noticing Braska's curious stare, she widened the grimace into a bright smile and turned to face him. "Oh, umm… thanks for getting me out of there, by the way!"

"No gratitude is necessary, miss…" Braska reassured her, pausing to direct them down a smaller alleyway. "... aah. I think you have me at a slight disadvantage here," he noted, giving Rikku a curious smile. "Might I have the pleasure of your name?"

A slightly vindictive grin crossed her face. "Oh, well, since Auron knows my name already maybe he should tell you." Hah, stick that in your pipe and smoke it! she thought triumphantly.

The Guardian in question narrowed his eyes. "Your injury doesn't seem to have wounded your tongue. Tell him yourself." He ignored the thoughtful look that Braska gave him and directed his attention towards the street.

Parried and avoided, Rikku noted with an annoyed sulk. Still, Braska looked at him funny. I think that counts as a score for me. Rikku one, Auron zippo! She hid her smirk as she noticed Braska now staring at her oddly.

"Miss?" he asked again.

"Huh? OH!" Rikku flushed.

"Definitely a natural blonde," she heard Jecht mumble and scowled darkly when Auron chuckled in response.

"Hey, no double teaming!" Rikku yelled at the Blitzball player.

Jecht only rolled his eyes and twirled a finger by his temple in response. "You ain't allowed to talk to me when you're havin' one of your crazy attacks," he replied. "Or don't tell me you forgot your own name now, too."

Rikku fumed and stalked away from Jecht with an exaggerated stomp, garnering a few more snickers from her companions. "Ooh! Boys can be so dumb," she growled. "For your information, I remember my own name perfectly well! It's Ri- Ri-" She trailed off and swallowed. What do I tell them? What do I do? What if this isn't just some kind of dream but the real past? Will Auron recognize me? No, wait, of course he wouldn't! But… oh my gosh, what if Braska recognizes me? Does he even know about me? Ooh… what to say, what to say!

The silence stretched out uncomfortably, and Rikku noticed Braska was giving her a polite, if a bit strained smile while Jecht was rolling his eyes again and shaking his head. Auron was directing yet another suspicious look towards her; the frequency with which he threw them in her direction was tempting her to give it a name. The Rikku Look, she thought. Yeah, that sounds pretty good. Except that I can't tell him it's called that!

"Ri-ri …?" Braska prompted, interrupting Rikku's brief flight of panic. "That's… a curious name for an Al Bhed."

"Rikkma! My name's Rikkma!" Rikku blurted out. Then she winced. Geez, that's an awful name. I hope uncle Braska doesn't speak too much Al Bhed…

Unfortunately for her, Braska seemed to be well-educated. His steps slowed and he blinked at Rikku; even worse than that, he was in a sharing mood. "While I know that there is something usually lost in translation... your father named you Huggle?" he repeated in disbelief. That stopped everyone else, who also turned to stare.

Rikku's blush grew so large that it crept down from her face and over her neck. She was actually beginning to wish she was wearing more clothing; all cultural pride aside, there was something to be said for not looking like a roasted wendigo in public. "I was a really cute little kid, alright!" Well, that much was true. Silently, she was contemplating whether or not it would be possible to drop-kick her own brain. Definitely not one of my better ideas here, she moaned to herself as the others continued to snigger at her.

"Well no wonder you were tryin' to keep it quiet," Jecht told her with a smirk. "No worries, Hugglebunny, we won't let you forget it again!"

Rikku sputtered and glared daggers at Jecht. "That's Rikkma to you!"

Braska, who somehow managed to recover with dignity, gave Rikku an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking," he said mildly. "Would you prefer to be called something else, Rikkma?"

Yes, please! "No, Rikkma's fine," Rikku managed to say through clenched teeth as her tattered pride died a silent and yet very dramatic death.

"Aw, you sure I can't call you Huggle?" Jecht asked her playfully.

"Really, no," Rikku hissed.

"How 'bout Huggle-Snuggle?"

"NO," Rikku repeated.

"Huggie-Wuggie?" Jecht tried again.

Rikku leapt for his face and he dodged away, laughing at her. Damn those Blitzball reflexes! "You're so dead when I get my hands on you!" she yelled furiously, diving for him again as Braska hastily stepped out of the way.

"Enough!" Auron suddenly said, bringing the trio's antics to an abrupt halt. "This is neither the time nor the place for such childish behavior," he ground out, giving his Rikku Look to all three of them. "Will you please try to control yourself?" he asked Jecht sourly. "And you, let him go," he added in a warning tone to Rikku.

Reluctantly, Rikku released the headlock she had managed to wrest Jecht into and shuffled the toe of her boot into the dirt. "Spoilsport," she muttered under her breath, and Jecht grunted in agreement.

"Did you say something?" Auron's glare intensified.

Rikku Look Mark II, she noted to herself, for personal use only! That so far only she had managed to provoke it gave her a mild sense of accomplishment, and she had to struggle to hide her giggle. "No, sir!" Rikku replied sweetly, doing her best to look innocent.

Auron eyed her before turning back down the road. "Fine. Can we continue our journey now, Huggie?" he added smoothly.

Rikku's mouth dropped open; though she could only see the back of his head, she was sure there was a satisfied smirk plastered across his face. Why that little sneak! she fumed.

"Hah!" Braska said, shaking his head in amusement as he followed after Auron. "Congratulations, Rikkma. I think that's the first time I've heard Auron make a joke."

"Oh?" Rikku repeated nonchalantly, her annoyance deflating as quickly as it had come.

Hmm… Rikku one, Auron one. I really should be minding this a little bit more, she thought as a silly grin stole across her face. The dominant half of her mind was deciding to ignore her reason in favor of flooding her with tingles of happiness for making Auron smile.

" 'ey," Jecht said, cuffing Rikku over her uninjured shoulder and knocking her out of her stupor. "Are you moonin' over a stiff like that?" He gestured at Auron's back as he spoke. "Man, you are a loony." He grinned, noticing her sudden blush.

Rikku sighed and trailed after Jecht reluctantly. "I know," she mumbled.

The remaining few blocks to Braska's residence passed without incident; this was mostly because Rikku was too preoccupied to pay very much attention to her companions. The further they travelled down the small alley, the shoddier the buildings became; the one they finally stopped before was tall and plain, crumbling from lack of repair and very obviously belonging to one of the lower circles of Bevelle's social rings. The entire district, in fact, appeared less than wealthy; just another one of Yevon's dirty little secrets carefully hidden from the public eye by the city's glorious exterior.

It surprised and dismayed her; for some reason Rikku had always imagined that her uncle was well-off and respected even before he began his Pilgrimage. Yuna had never mentioned anything to her about it while they were growing up; then again, in a small village like Besaid the dividing lines of wealth and power were practically non-existent. She let her eyes travel over the dilapidated building and managed to hold back her disappointed sigh.

"What a dump," she heard Jecht echo behind her much less tactfully, earning him an angry glare from Auron.

"I know it's not much," Braska began with a touch of embarrassment, "but it does have all the comforts of home."

Jecht rubbed the back of his head uneasily and fumbled for a way to draw his foot out of his mouth. "Oh, uh… well, it's a nice dump," he tried. Rikku scowled and smacked him on the arm and he fell silent.

"What he meant is thanks for taking us in," Rikku clarified, smiling brightly at Braska. "It sure beats the heck out of the inside of a prison cell!"

"I live here with my daughter Yuna," Braska explained as he let them into the hallway and moved towards a flight of dingy stairs. "She's only seven years old, but I assure you she's very well-behaved."

"A daughter, huh?" Jecht repeated. "Can't wait to meet her!" He smiled eagerly, following Braska.

Rikku ducked her head and held back behind them, worrying her lower lip. Yunie's still here! I forgot about that… ooh …

"Changed your mind?"

Rikku spun around and saw Auron waiting for her to climb the steps, his arms folded.

"Huh?" she asked him.

"If you wish to leave now, I won't stop you," he said levelly.

Rikku frowned at Auron and matched his pose, tapping her foot. "You really think I'd just cut out the first chance I got?" she said incredulously. "For your information, I could've left you guys anytime I wanted to! You're just trying to pick a fight with me now, aren't you?"

Auron tipped his head and watched her solemnly. He didn't look upset - at least, not any more than he usually did. Rikku dropped her arms and shifted her weight, waiting for him to speak.

"Unlike Jecht, you seem to know what becoming a Guardian entails." His stare unnerved her and Rikku dropped her eyes to the ground. "No one would think less of you if you decided to leave right now."

Rikku rocked on her feet slowly, an unconscious habit she had picked up whenever she was lost in thought. He's… giving me a chance to cut my losses and run, she thought to herself. Almost like the Auron I know. I should probably go before I mess things up… taking his advice would be the smart thing to do. But he's being so nice!

"Come on, if we hang around here too long they're gonna wonder what happened to us," Rikku finally said, looking up at him with a grin. Then she turned and sprinted up the stairs, too nervous to see his reaction. If he was disappointed with her decision, she knew it would shake her confidence. She was more scared about how she would feel if he wasn't, though.

Rikku arrived at the top of the steps in time to see a tiny girl with an unruly mop of brown hair come barrelling out of the apartment and into Braska's outstretched arms. He laughed loudly and scooped the girl up, spinning her around before settling her against his chest.

"Yunie," Rikku whispered to herself as she caught sight of the girl's mismatched eyes. Then she stepped behind Jecht's bulk and tried to make herself unnoticeable.

"Ain't she a little angel!" Jecht said, and she heard Yuna giggle in response. "Her mother must be a real looker," he added, giving Braska an appreciative wink.

"Yes, she's my whole world now," Braska admitted fondly, planting a small kiss on his daughter's forehead. "Everything I do is for her." Noticing Jecht's sudden change of expression, he laughed and shook his head at the corpulent, elderly woman who also emerged from the apartment. "Oh, this is Beatrix, a friend. She looks after Yuna when I'm not home," Braska said. "My wife… can't be here right now," he finished with a pained expression. Shaking his head, he gave a thankful smile to the woman as she left down the stairs. "Please, come inside and make yourselves at home."

Jecht followed Braska through the doorway eagerly but Rikku hesitated outside, wavering. She made up her mind and stepped through, however, when she felt Auron's presence behind her. I'll make it through this. Just act cool, "Rikkma!"

"Father, who's that?" Yuna's quiet voice made Rikku jump and emit a little squeak of surprise. As she feared, Yuna's eyes were trained on her in rapt fascination. "She looks like mommy!"

"That's because Rikkma is also Al Bhed, just like your mother," Braska said gently, giving Rikku an amused smile.

"Her eyes are green!" Yuna said again, a sunny grin breaking over her face as she pointed at Rikku. "Just like mine!" The little girl was obviously very excited; Rikku couldn't blame her, though. It wasn't often that Al Bhed were spotted anywhere near Bevelle, not unless they were criminals awaiting punishment. Still, she breathed a tiny sigh of relief when Yuna's curious gaze shifted over towards Jecht. "Who's that?" the little girl asked, looking over the large man.

"I'm Jecht, star blitzer of the Zanarkand Abes!" he said proudly, giving Yuna a broad smile. The smile dropped as Yuna ignored him and broke out into a delighted squeal.

"Auron!" she shouted as the object of her attention entered the room. She rushed towards him and threw her arms around his leg tightly. Rikku had to cover her mouth to keep from laughing out loud as Auron glanced down and furrowed his brow.

"Yuna," he said, giving the girl an awkward pat on the head. "I need that leg."

"Sorry," she mumbled, releasing him reluctantly and stepping back to give him a formal bow before returning to her father's arms.

"You got a real way with women, Auron," Jecht observed, earning him a glare from both his subject and Rikku. "Quite a place you got yourself here, Braska," Jecht added with a grin.

"It's not much, but I call it home," Braska said, pulling a giggling Yuna onto his knee and bouncing her playfully.

Rikku let her eyes travel over the sparsely decorated room; though small, it was very clean and neat, a sharp contrast to the building's shoddy exterior. What made the place more comfortable than anything, however, was the sight of Braska and Yuna sitting together at the small table, smiling at each other and talking quietly. They created a small circle of domestic comfort that blanketed the entire room more completely than any décor could; even Auron seemed to relax in their presence, his scowl smoothing out into a comfortable half-smile.

They're happy together here, that's why it feels like home, Rikku realized with a slight twinge of nostalgia. Making a home for yourself doesn't have anything to do with money or power. It's just the place where you feel like you belong. She closed her eyes and unobtrusively slipped herself into a far corner of the room; it's just because I don't want Yunie to see that much of me, she told herself. The truth was that she couldn't watch them anymore, though; father and daughter, sitting together and smiling, both unaware of the future that would tear them apart. You could almost forget about Sin when you see them like that. Almost … but uncle Braska never forgot about Sin.

"We'll be starting the Pilgrimage tomorrow morning," she heard Braska say. "The temple will be open for Summoner parties, and it'd be good to get an early start."

"There is a problem," Auron said quietly, catching everyone's attention. He pulled the rolled parchment out from his coat and threw towards Braska, who snatched it out of the air. "Kinoc's given us two days to leave after we complete the Trials." His shifted his gaze to Rikku and she stared at the ground guiltily.

"Two days?" Braska said faintly, carefully setting the parchment aside without opening it. His eyes were fixed on Yuna, who was playing with the flaps on his robe, oblivious to his concern. "That little?" The sad lilt to his voice made his daughter lift her head and look at him with worry.

"Father?" she asked in a tiny voice.

He bent over and rested his forehead on top of hers, closing his eyes. Then he straightened and gave Yuna a sad smile. "Two days, then," he said firmly, and her eyes widened.

"No," she protested, and Rikku wondered at how old she sounded; she was only seven, but Sin didn't make exceptions for children in Spira. "No! You promised a week!" she said more loudly, tears beginning to form at the corners of her eyes.

"I'm sorry, Yuna," Braska said, gently extracting her hands from his chest, which had bunched into tiny fists against the front of his robe. "It's Yevon's will."

"Hmm," Auron grunted, the scorn evident in his voice.

"Hey hey hey," Jecht interrupted, standing up and cracking his neck. "What's with the long faces? Listen up, kid," he said, approaching Braska and kneeling down, staring a surprised Yuna in the eyes. "You know what I do whenever I need to turn a frown upside-down?"

"… no?" Yuna sniffled, swabbing at her eyes, tears momentarily forgotten by Jecht's insistent demand for her attention.

"Blitz!" he said with a grin. "Tell you what, find me a blitzball and I'll show you some of my secret moves," he promised with a wink. "You don't wanna miss it, 'cause I'm the best!"

"That's an excellent idea," Braska said, eyeing Jecht gratefully. "Why don't you go get the ball from your room?" he told Yuna, easing her off of his knee.

"But…" she mumbled uncertainly, looking between Braska and Jecht.

" 'ey! Didn't I tell you I'm the star player of the Zanarkand Abes?" Jecht boasted, thumbing his chest and puffing up with pride.

"Really?" Yuna repeated, her eyes starting to sparkle with eagerness. "They play Blitzball in Zanarkand?"

"All day and all night," Jecht reassured her. "You won't get a chance like this again, kid, so hurry up!"

"Okay!" Yuna yelled, his good cheer catching as she scrambled towards her room. She emerged a few moments later, blitzball in hand, and yelped as Jecht swept her into his arms and lumbered towards the door.

"I'll bring her back in one piece," Jecht told them as he flipped Yuna upside-down and held her by her legs, causing her to shriek in delight. Braska held the door open for them as they left the small apartment. "Here we go!" Rikku heard him yell theatrically from the hallway, punctuated by another one of Yuna's high laughs.

"My lord, are you sure you trust him?" Auron asked skeptically.

Braska shut the door with an amused expression, shaking his head. "Relax, Auron. He's a Guardian now."

"That's another problem," Rikku heard Auron mutter darkly under his breath.

"You need to learn to be more trusting," Braska scolded the other man. "He has a good heart. Even you must see the way he treated Yuna. Who would've guessed that someone like Jecht had a soft spot for children?"

Not me, Rikku thought to herself. Probably not Tidus, either. I wonder why he hated his dad so much? Maybe Jecht was just bad with his own kid. She blinked and looked up when she noticed Braska was standing before her, asking her a question.

"… Bikanel?" she heard him say.

"Huh?" she asked, blushing. "Sorry, come again?"

"He asked if you came from Bikanel Island," Auron called out, clearly irritated by her lack of attention.

"Hey! What do you know about that?" she said defensively, glaring at Auron. With Yuna gone from the apartment, he had retracted back into the stoic Yevonite shell she was growing increasingly familiar with, and it made her feel uncomfortable and protective of what little privacy her people had.

Auron shook his head with a disbelieving grunt and shrugged. "I know more of Braska's life than you can imagine," he said with contempt. "I can assure you that I have no interest in discussing the secrets of the Al Bhed with you or anyone else."

Rikku blushed and looked away; so Auron knows where we live already. Oh great… I feel like such an idiot now! Fortunately, Braska came to her rescue with a sympathetic nod.

"No, you are correct. I understand that it's quite a sensitive topic for you." He turned and gestured towards Auron. "Perhaps you could go check on Yuna for me after all?"

"But -" Auron said, pushing off from the wall in protest.

"Auron, please. We will be fine," Braska reassured him. Auron's frown deepened, but after a short pause he stalked out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

"He really needs to work on controlling his temper," Braska observed. Rikku allowed him to lead her to the table and took the seat that he pulled out for her. He left to enter one of the back rooms and emerged shortly afterwards with a small box full of medical supplies.

"Let's have a look at that shoulder," he told her as he laid out some gauze and tape across the tabletop. Rikku leaned forward and swept her hair away from her back, wincing as she felt him clean off the caked blood that had dried there. "Ah, good," she heard him murmur as he worked. "It's not that bad after all. The potion they gave you must have already dissolved the bullet. The wound just needs to be sealed properly now. Do you mind if I...?"

"No, go ahead," Rikku said, shutting her eyes. She would never get used to the feeling of being the target of a cast spell; even when they were beneficial, they still brought up memories of Brother's little Thunder fiasco. She heard Braska murmur something under his breath, and the ticklish feeling of magic raced through her spine and settled over her wound, making it itch unbearably. After a moment, the sensation dissipated and she sat up, rolling her shoulder. "All better!" she cheered, turning to give Braska a relieved smile. "Thanks a bunch!"

He nodded at her while clearing off the table, and then hesitated with a guilty expression, box in hand. "I'm sorry about what I said, earlier. I shouldn't have brought up your Home in front of Auron."

"I'm the one who should apologize," Rikku assured him with a sheepish grin. "After all, you married an Al Bhed, so you're practically one of us now!" Then she bit off her smile and blushed deeply, recalling Auron's brief mention of Braska's exile. Oh… actually that doesn't happen until after you defeat Sin. Oopsie…

Braska cleared his throat and looked away, allowing her to recover from her slip gracefully. "That's very kind of you to say," he replied, though the pained expression on his face told her that he knew otherwise. "You know…" he continued absently, glancing at her from the corner of his eye. "In many ways, you do remind me of my late wife. She also had a very optimistic outlook on life." Then he squinted at her more directly and his voice became thoughtful. "But it's more than that… in fact, it's uncanny. You do look very similar to -"

"Oh, heh heh!" Rikku yelped, startling Braska out of his scrutiny. "Well, you know us Al Bhed! We all look the same!" She fell quiet as a fierce, angry frown marred Braska's normally kind features; he looked more upset than when she had inadvertently insulted him just moments earlier.

"I do not want to hear such things again," he told her sternly. "If you don't have any confidence in yourself, then how can I expect you to be able to protect me as a Guardian?"

Rikku bit her lip and hunched over; even without a vast age difference and legendary reputation behind him, she still felt like a small child who was being scolded by her elders. "Geez, it was just a joke," she mumbled, picking at her fingernails.

Braska's hand thumped on the table loudly and made her jump. She looked up and saw that his eyes had grown icy and distant. "Your people are not a joke, Rikkma, no matter what Yevon or anyone else may say. You mustn't ever let anyone convince you of that." He leaned over and trapped her under a direct glare so intense that she forgot to fidget and froze in place. "Things in Spira will never change if you simply accept them."

Rikku blinked; he was so much like Yuna it hurt. She found herself feeling something for him despite the fact that she knew how his journey would end; he was filled with kindness and resolve, and hope enough to carry the burdens of the world on his narrow shoulders without breaking. But just like Yuna, he kept none for himself. "Then what about Summoners?" she blurted out. "You go on your Pilgrimage, you die, and then Sin comes back! Sin always comes back! How can you just accept that?"

Braska leaned back and closed his eyes, shaking his head. "There's always a chance things will be different this time."

"But what if they're not?" Rikku clenched her fists.

"Then at least I will have given Yuna a childhood of peace and happiness," he said firmly.

"By dying?" Rikku lashed out, feeling tears start to sting at her own eyes. "You really think that's what will make her happy?"

Braska stiffened, slamming the cover of the medical kit shut with a loud snap. "You, a stranger, would presume to question me?" he shot back. Then he relaxed, his shoulders drooping, and shook his head. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you like that, Rikkma. But please… do not try to change my mind about this. I'm set on my course."

The false name brought Rikku back to her senses and she wiped at her eyes.

What am I thinking? If I stop him from going on his Pilgrimage, then Sin will never be defeated! The very thought, however, made her feel tainted; as though she was somehow sacrificing Braska and Yuna's happiness for her own future. For all of Spira, she reminded herself sternly. Still, it didn't change the fact that he was a sacrifice, a lamb they were all leading to slaughter on Yevon's altar. She shivered and wrapped her arms around herself.

Braska cleared his throat, then re-seated himself at the table. "I've seen your Home before, you know," he told her, as though testing the churning waters between them with his words. "Once, I went there as a missionary to spread the word of Yevon to your people. That's how I met Yuna's mother."

Rikku smiled despite herself; she was too young to have witnessed the huge fuss that Braska's arrival generated, but Keyakku had often regaled her and Brother with the stories about it, snatched whispers in the desert whenever they could find themselves away from Cid's watchful eyes. "Yeah, I heard about that," she mumbled.

"Ah, so you weren't there when it happened," Braska added with a short chuckle. "That was probably better for you… I think my presence there was fairly unsettling. Many people didn't appreciate my efforts to convert them." He tilted his head and rubbed his chin. "Tell me, though. How did you come to Bevelle in the first place? This isn't exactly the preferred destination of the Al Bhed."

"Actually my coming here was something like an accident," Rikku began. "I did used to live at Home, but that was before... I, uh, started wandering around Spira, looking for adventure." Close enough to the truth, she thought.

"Well you certainly found it," Braska told her. "I think it would be best if you stayed with our group until we were safely out of Bevelle. I don't mean to impose on you, however. I imagine you'll want to eventually return to Bikanel, and I'm afraid my own journey won't be passing that way."

"No, I'm exactly where I want to be!" Rikku said, thinking of the temples.

Noticing Braska's surprised observation of her outburst, she laughed brightly and waved her hand through the air. "I mean, I'm not trying to get back Home right now." Since I guess I'm already sort of there. I wonder what would happen if I met myself? I don't remember ever meeting me before… ugh, better not to find out. The universe might implode. She shook herself out of her daydream when she noticed Braska giving her a pitying look. "What?" she asked him in confusion.

"I see… so you must be an outcast, too," he said sympathetically, planting a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Well, I know it must be hard for you, but you're welcome to stay with us for as long as you need," he told her.

Rikku managed to clamp her mouth shut and nod before the giggles escaped from her. Outcast? Hah, more like part of the reason you're exiled yourself! That sobered up her humor enough to give Braska a semi-serious nod. "Thanks," she told him again. He smiled in response and inclined his head before stepping away, leaving her alone with her thoughts at the table.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

5: An Evening At Braska's

Without Braska's immediate presence to cloud her judgment, Rikku took the opportunity to sit back and consider her options. She planted her chin in her palm, furrowing her brows in thought. I could really get to like these guys… but I can't interfere with their Pilgrimage. Absolutely positively no, Rikku! Just go along with it until you can talk to Bahamut, that's all.

"I really hope I won't be able to stick around after the first temple," she mumbled to herself under her breath. "Still…" She had to admit it felt nice to finally get to know her own uncle as something more than a legend told through the stone statues in the temples. I shouldn't feel so guilty about sticking around here. It's the perfect opportunity to sort of make up for what the Al Bhed did to him, right? Rikku's head shot out of her hand and a huge smile broke across her face.

"Yeah, that's it!" she exclaimed out loud. "Rikku's big chance to clear the family name!" Cheered by her new sense of purpose, she dug through her pouch and drew out one of the spheres she had recorded on earlier. "This mission isn't going down without a record," she said confidently, fiddling with the controls.

Braska emerged from the room just then, stopping in surprise when he saw her with the sphere in hand. He'd removed his formal helmet and lengthy outer robe, revealing long brown hair was bound in a neat braid that hung nearly halfway down his back. He was balancing a bundle of folded linens and pillows in his arms, and carefully set them down on the couch before turning to regard her with an amused grin.

"Well, this is interesting," he noted with humor. "Is there a reason you're making a recording of me, besides to prove that men are capable of doing domestic work? Should I be worried? I wouldn't want the destruction of the male reputation to be added to my list of transgressions."

"Of course there's a reason!" Rikku replied gleefully, leaping out of her chair and dancing in place. "If you're gonna defeat Sin, then we should get every minute of this trip down for the record! You're making history you know!" She paused and thought about how many spheres it would actually take to accomplish that mission. "Well, maybe not every minute," she amended. "Now smile and say shoopuf!"

The door burst open as she held the sphere up, and a very disgruntled-looking Auron stomped in. He came up short, his surprised glance landing directly in the sphere, and then recovered with a shake of his head and gave Rikku an exasperated glare. "I thought I told you to stop playing with those things."

"Aww man, you really need to lighten up!" Jecht called out, strolling in behind Auron. He clapped the other man on the back as he passed by; Yuna was following him, her eyes sparkling with adoration.

"That was fun!" she cried, running in front of Auron and tugging at his red coat. Auron grimaced and looked away while Jecht snickered.

"Is there something I should know about?" Braska asked.

"I saw the…" Yuna's face screwed up in thought. "Sublimely… Mag… Magnificant…"

"Magnificent," Jecht offered helpfully.

"The Sublimely Magnificent Jecht Shot Mark III," Yuna pronounced carefully. "Sir Jecht used it on Sir Auron!"

Braska smiled at his daughter uncertainly, while Rikku covered her mouth and began to snort. Auron simply clenched his teeth and unhooked his sword, slamming it into the corner of the room with more force than necessary.

"That must have hurt," Rikku managed to say, grinning at Auron.

"… and then Sir Auron showed us how to do a Shooting Star!" Yuna continued happily. The memory of the day was one she was going to treasure for years to come, to Jecht's obvious pleasure and Auron's more subtle chagrin.

Braska's other eyebrow joined its companion as he looked at Auron. "I suppose we shall need to buy a new blitzball tomorrow?" he asked, though the grin twitching at his lips softened his hard tone.

"Sorry," Auron ground out, slumping himself next to his sword.

"I ain't," Jecht replied, clasping his hands behind his head with a smug smile.

"Do it again, Sir Jecht!" Yuna said eagerly, clapping her hands together.

"Oh no, I think that's enough excitement for one day, young lady," Braska cut in hastily before Auron could insert a scathing retort to Jecht. "Time for you to go to bed."

"No!" Yuna cried in protest, shaking her head and balling her fists together under her chin. "I don't want go. The day isn't over yet!"

"C'mon, kid," Jecht said with an encouraging smile, standing over her. "You should listen to your old man. Whadda ya say I tuck you in? Will you go peacefully then?"

The pout left Yuna's face reluctantly, but she gave Jecht a slow nod. "Okay," she said, reaching out and grabbing Jecht's hand. "I guess I can show you Mr. Moogle instead," she murmured as she pulled him towards her room.

Rikku giggled and turned the sphere back towards Braska, who was looking after the two with a tender expression. "I think you might have finally found a rival for Yuna's affections, Auron," Braska noted, his lips quirking.

"Hnn," Auron said, the severe expression on his face softening. Then the smirk returned. "Children always prefer the company of one another over adults."

Braska chuckled, then turned towards Rikku and nodded. "Yes… this is a wonderful idea, Rikkma," he told her. "Since you seem to be familiar with spheres already, would you mind if I put you in charge of making the recordings? We can buy a few more for our supplies tomorrow before we visit the temple."

"For real?" Rikku asked, her smile growing wider. "Yeah!" she cheered when Braska nodded at her, holding her sphere up in the air and hopping from one foot to the other. "You can count on me!"

"This is not a good idea!" Auron cut in, scowling at both of them. "My lord, making sphere recordings is a waste of both time and money! We should be concentrating on things that are more important."

Braska gave Auron a level look. "What could be more important than Yuna?" he asked. That silenced the other man effectively, though it also brought Rikku plummeting out of her happy-dance and back into reality with a crash.

"Beautiful girl you got, Braska!" Jecht's loud emergence from Yuna's room broke through the sombre atmosphere; he was wearing a goofy grin on his face which dropped into a scowl when he noticed the tension in the room. "Whoa, somebody die while I wasn't lookin'?" he asked, scratching his head.

Braska smiled and shook his head at Jecht. "Not yet."

"That isn't funny," Rikku said lowly, collapsing back into her chair and fiddling with the sphere in her hands.

"Sheesh, you all need to stop hangin' around Auron so much," Jecht complained, stretching his arms over his head and yawning. "Ahh… free at last! You got somethin' to eat around here?" he added, wandering towards the kitchen.

"Braska," Auron said, nodding his head towards Jecht. "He still doesn't understand the nature of our task."

"What's to understand?" Jecht asked cluelessly. "We go to Zanarkand, me 'n Auron keep you from getting pounded by whatever we meet along the way, and Blondie over there cheers us on from the sidelines. Right?"

"What!" Rikku said, depression once again vanishing in a cloud of irritation at Jecht's overbearing male ego. "Listen here, you big lug -"

Braska cleared his throat and faced the other man. "Now, Jecht…" he began diplomatically, cutting Rikku off. "I am a Summoner, and you are my Guardian. As such, I am in your hands until we reach Zanarkand."

"Right, right," Jecht said with boredom, ignoring Braska. "So, what's a Summer-ner, anyway?"

The grinding of Auron's teeth was audible even over Braska's helpless sigh. Rikku barely managed to shut down the sphere before the wild gasps of laughter came bubbling from her throat. He's more clueless than Tidus! Like father like son, I guess. Tidus is just like Jecht! And Braska is just like Yuna… and Auron is Auron and Rikkma is Rikku! I wonder if Kimahri, Wakka or Lulu are feeling left out. Rikku dropped her head into her arms at the table and laughed louder, even after the others stopped talking and stared at her.

"We set her off again," Jecht mumbled, and Rikku took a few deep, calming breaths to silence herself. She hiccupped and brushed away the tears that were streaming down her face. Braska murmured a quiet reply that she didn't quite hear, and then Auron grunted loudly in disagreement.

"We know nothing about her," she heard him say. "She shouldn't have been made a Guardian."

" 'ey, she knows I'm from Zanarkand," Jecht answered him irritably. "That's good enough for me."

"And why shouldn't it be?" Auron responded. "You can't possibly have come from Zanarkand. It's obvious that you two are working together, the only mystery is what you hope to accomplish with your little deception."

"That ain't true!" Jecht said, his voice rising. "I didn't even know that chick's name until an hour ago!"

"But you said she knew yours," Auron replied, his voice cool.

"All the fans know my name," Jecht replied confidently.

Auron only shook his head in disbelief. "Do you even listen to yourself?"

Rikku slammed her hands on the table and stood up, annoyance bubbling over her features. "Hey! Stop talking about me like I can't hear you!" She glared at them. "And for the last time, I'm not one of your fans, Jecht! Honestly, I don't even like Blitzball that much!" Well, that was a bit of a stretch, considering that she was a major part of the Gullwing blitzing team. But Jecht didn't need to know that.

Jecht crossed his arms and redirected his glare from Auron to Rikku. "What the hell's your problem, anyway?" he growled. "Here I am, stickin' out my own neck for you and this is the thanks I get?"

Rikku planted her hands on her hips and glared at him. "You wanna know what my problem is? My problem is you!" Because you're being nice. And Yunie likes you. And you're sticking up for me even though you don't know who I am. And I KILLED YOU DAMN IT! "I don't need your help!" she said shrilly.

Jecht's face registered surprise at her unexpected outburst before it dropped into a cold scowl; it looked almost foreign on his usually relaxed features. "Crazy little ingrate," he spat out, crossing his arms. "I get the message! Fight your own damn battles from now on, kid."

"I'm not a child!" Rikku replied instantly.

"You sure act like a cry baby sometimes," Jecht growled at her. "Shit, I swear you whine even more than my own kid!"

"Maybe Tidus wouldn't cry so much if you hadn't left him behind in Zanarkand!" Rikku yelled back.

Jecht froze, his face growing ashen underneath the dark tan of his skin. "It wasn't my choice to leave my boy!"

Oops, Rikku thought, cringing. He towered over her, his expression thunderous and his eyes dark with fury. Rikku had never really seen Jecht angry before; now he was, angrier even than Auron, and his wrath was directed completely towards her.

A hand descended on Jecht's shoulder and carefully pulled him away from her; Braska stepped between them and gave the Blitzball player an understanding smile.

"When I saw you with Yuna, I thought you might have a child of your own," he said, his soothing voice cutting through the tension as though he wasn't even aware it was there. "You're very good with children."

A guilty look crossed over Jecht's face, and he turned away from Braska. "Yeah, well… not all of 'em," he muttered under his breath.

There was a raw, aching pain in his tone and Rikku realized how much Jecht actually missed his home and his family. With his gruff, easy-going exterior, it was hard to imagine he could take anything seriously. She'd underestimated him. I… guess he really does care about Tidus.

Braska gave Jecht another pat on the shoulder and released him before facing Auron. "I think this proves that they are not involved in some grand scheme together," he pointed out.

"Or that they're good actors," Auron replied.

Jecht's anger receded at Auron's words and looked over his shoulder at Rikku. "You ain't from Zanarkand too, are you?" he asked her.

"Huh?" Rikku said weakly, still trying to recover from her near-death experience. "No way!" she added. "I already told you, I know all about it from spheres."

"Spheres, huh…" Jecht's eyes narrowed. Sweat beaded on Rikku's forehead as he gave her an unusually calculating glance. Tiny alarm klaxons began to sound in her mind as she realized her mistake. Tidus! I called his son Tidus! She held her breath, her fingers and toes going numb with the fear that he would somehow expose her deception and get her booted from Braska's party before their journey even began, before she had the chance to ply the Fayth for answers to her own questions.

"Whatever," Jecht finally said, turning his back on her. Somehow Rikku knew he wasn't going to drop his suspicions quite that easily, but she was thankful that he seemed content to let them remain just that in front of the other two men.

"It has been a long day for all of us," Braska said. "I think it would be best to continue this discussion tomorrow morning." He picked up a pillow and a blanket and pushed them into Rikku's arms. "You can sleep in Yuna's room tonight, Rikkma. I'm sure she won't mind the company."

"Thanks," Rikku muttered with a blush, beating a hasty retreat from the room. Once again, she was grateful for Braska's timely intervention; it seemed he spent most of his time playing the peacemaker between their explosive group dynamics. There was always bound to be tension between herself and Auron even if he wouldn't have been acting like a complete Yevonite; her continuing attraction to him despite his dour nature seemed to ensure that. But she had been surprised by how much she was affected by Jecht's disapproval. I don't even know the guy that well! So… why do I feel so bad about hurting his feelings like that? With a sigh, she realized she knew perfectly well why she was feeling guilty. Because he didn't deserve that last dig. "Guess it's going to be Rikku's Big Apology Day tomorrow," she muttered to herself, entering Yuna's bedroom.

Rikku shut the door behind herself quietly, letting her eyes adjust to the sudden darkness. The moon was shining brightly outside, and the silvery light that spilled through the curtains illuminated the room with an ethereal glow. Yuna was already fast asleep, cradled by pillows and moonlight. She looked angelic, her pale skin shining white against the stark darkness of the night; if it hadn't been for the ratty stuffed moogle that was securely tucked underneath her chin, Rikku might have mistaken her cousin for a Fayth.

"Yunie," Rikku whispered, creeping to the young girl's bedside and studying her peaceful face. "You're gonna grow up to do some really great things, you know, greater than you ever dreamed about." Sighing, she leaned over and brushed a stray lock of hair away from Yuna's forehead, and the little girl turned and mumbled softly. "Sorry," Rikku murmured, biting her lip and blinking away another unexpected tear. Gotta stop doing that, Rikku. The guys are ready to haul you off to the nuthouse as it is already! "Just think of the now," she told herself, tiptoeing away from Yuna's bed and carefully spreading her own blanket over the floor.

After removing her boots and unhooking her twin daggers, stashed securely away from Yuna's curious reach, Rikku settled herself on the blanket and began to sort through her remaining equipment. "Those priests took my best stuff," she muttered under her breath in disgust. In a way, she was thankful that she had brought only her daggers and Conflagration grid with her on her initial trip to the Farplane; she was sure the temple would have been more than eager to keep a tight grip on her more powerful garment grids had she equipped them.

Much more upsetting to her was the loss of her bracelets, though. She had spent hours tooling them together; the protections she'd woven into the small bangles had been miles better than anything she ever managed to work into her old targes. Their technicians are probably trying to figure out how I made those right now. Great, way to give Yevon a helping hand there, Rikku! "Well, not like it matters anyway. I guess I can always make something new. No, not just something new, I'll make something better. So there!"

The sparse contents of her pockets were all too quickly laid out across the blanket, and Rikku let out another heavy sigh. There were the two spheres she had recently recorded, a key chain she'd stolen from Paine's vest, one of Yuna's colorful, hand-woven cloth-and-bead hair ties and a few pieces of lint. Not even a single potion remained from her former supplies. Looks like I'm starting from scratch again. Well, not entirely…

Brightening, she extracted the three remaining dresspheres from her belt and inspected them carefully. They seemed to have survived the trip no worse for the wear, emitting their usual faint blue glow. Rikku couldn't stop the relieved smile from stretching across her face as she picked up one and gave it a small kiss. Then she studied the other two spheres and her mouth dropped open into a disappointed pout. "Crap, I overwrote my Luck sphere! And I really liked that one too!" She held her breath and fell silent as Yuna mumbled and turned in her bed, then leaned forward and resumed her inspection much more quietly.

Lenne's sphere is okay, at least… and my Alchemist sphere is still good too. Shoot… if only I had more hair! "Samurai, Songstress and Alchemist," Rikku whispered to herself. It wasn't exactly the ideal setup she would have chosen to have a face-off with Sin; in fact, it wasn't even an ideal setup for her normal sphere-hunting forays. "Better than nothing, I guess."

And it was; it was a whole lot better than nothing; the power available through Shinra's grid technology was a step beyond anything Yuna's party had managed to gather or learn on their own during the course of their Pilgrimage. That wasn't to say that garment grids were a magical cure-all that could turn any rube into a powerful warrior, no matter what impression Leblanc might have given. Like almost anything that had to do with sphere technology, they worked by tapping into a person's memories and emotions. Without the strong will necessary to harness full control of the spheres, the grids were simply useless trinkets, amusing but unreliable show-costumes. In that sense, summoning the hidden powers out of a dressphere was slightly similar to summoning an aeon, albeit on a much smaller scale. With the exception of the Songstress dressphere, the costumes usually didn't talk back or exert their own personalities when called out. It was also no wonder that Yuna had been the most skilled at using them in their entire group.

Rikku picked up the first sphere and examined it closely, wondering how grid technology might have affected the journeys of the countless other Summoners before Yuna.

Ultimately not very much, she realized; grids only boosted the capabilities of an individual, and it took more than just one person to beat the terrible power that was Sin. She smiled at the Alchemist sphere and carefully tucked it back into her grid. Like the Thief sphere, it was something Rikku had created herself. She had poured her most precious memories into it - thoughts of Home, of the friends and relatives she had lost there, even of her brother Keyakku; she treasured the result it had produced. It was a living, breathing reminder of her people, one she wore as easily as a second skin, and neither Yuna nor Paine had objected when she opted to keep it for herself.

The Songstress sphere, on the other hand, had belonged without question to Yuna. Or, more accurately, it had belonged to Lenne, and Yuna had inherited its power. After Tidus returned, Yuna willingly gave it up, wanting to leave behind all traces of the hardship and suffering of her previous adventures and create a fresh beginning for herself in Besaid. Paine had threatened Yuna with bodily harm at the mere thought of being offered the outlandish sphere, and so it had happily landed in Rikku's possession. Now, as Rikku stole a glance over her shoulder at the younger, sleeping Yuna, she was glad to have it; it might not have been her memories that powered the sphere, but it was one of the only definite connections to her cousin that she had left with her. She slotted it into the grid and moved on to the last remaining sphere.

The Samurai sphere. The one she had also created by herself, to everyone's surprise. Rikku was no warrior; discretion wasn't only the better part of valor in Rikku's world, but often the preferred first choice. And yet the sphere she had crafted was contrary to every belief she thought she held true. It had created a costume built on honor and strength, filled with memories of whispered promises and binding vows. It was a painful outfit for her to wear, but one she treasured above all others. The few times she had let her teammates try it out, they had complained that it felt too "heavy" to be of any practical use. For Rikku, it was a burden she carried willingly; she knew that the heaviness came from her sorrow, for things that never were and could never be.

Until now, Rikku reminded herself, thinking of the younger Auron, living and breathing and separated from her only by one thin wall in Braska's tiny apartment. The sphere flickered and glowed in her palm, and Rikku knew it was changing; she knew because her memories of Auron were changing with it. She carefully placed it into the grid, smiling to herself. It was still a painful dressphere; that would never go away, for suffering was what had made them into the people that they were. But she also knew it would not be quite so heavy to wear anymore, not as long as this Auron stood and breathed next to her.

"If I can even wear when he's around," Rikku mumbled. He'll take one look at me and know something's up for sure… She shook her head and pushed it aside as a problem to be dealt with for later. "Maybe with all the brawn in this party I won't need to use it at all," she comforted herself, toying with the grid. Even without the dresspheres, the grid would in theory keep her feeling at least mildly useful; it wasn't everyone who could manage to throw around a Flare spell after all. Rikku had tried her best to learn it on her own from Lulu, but after several failed attempts and more than a few painful accidents, both had given up on the cause as hopeless.

Rikku trailed over the gate that would activate the Flare magic with her fingertip and wondered where Lulu was now; it was strange, trying to imagine the sophisticated black mage as a girl even younger than herself. She wondered if Lulu was already journeying with Father Zuke, or even Lady Ginnem - if they might meet on the road to Zanarkand, and what she could say to her mentor and secret idol if they crossed paths. "I could use some of your cool right now, Lulu," Rikku mumbled to herself, tracing over the runic patterns on the stone plate apprehensively.

A chill shook Rikku as she fingered the grid, and gathering her courage together, she snapped it off. It fell into her hands, and her breath left her in a loud whoosh. The supplemental magic boost seeped out of her body, leaving her feeling tired and deflated.

Then she frowned and held the grid up for inspection in the moonlight. "That didn't feel any different than normal," she mused. What happened earlier, anyway? Why did it hurt so much? It felt like I was being eaten from the inside out! Eaten… like my magic was being eaten! Panic struck Rikku, and she hastily put away the grid and held her hands in front of her, whispering a few desperate phrases. To her relief, a tiny flicker of flame danced to life in her cupped palms; proof that she could still cast her minor spells even without the grid. She whispered a few more words and tried to strengthen the flame; it grew slightly brighter, but after a few moments Rikku allowed it to flicker and die out. Nope… I still can't even cast a Firaga, I know it. She sagged over, mollified; limited as her own magic was, Rikku prided herself on the little she had.

"Well, if it didn't drain me, and it didn't boost me, what the heck happened?" she mumbled, eying the grid. Then, taking a deep breath, she picked it up and strapped it back on around her waist. A thrum of energy, the tingly feeling that ticked all the way through her body from the top of her head to the tips of her toes; it was the usual response she had to equipping any magic grid. Nothing was out of the ordinary; no hint of the strange, phantom pain that had wracked her body the first time even registered. Rikku was relieved that it seemed to be working properly again, though she was still uneasy about her initial reaction to the grid. She snuck another glance at Yuna and decided to keep the plate equipped around her waist; there was no telling if anyone else would have a similar reaction to hers if they wore it, and Rikku didn't want to inadvertently risk causing her cousin unnecessary pain.

Except for the fact that I'm guiding her own father to his death. It's just the little things, right?

Rikku flopped back against the blankets and turned her head to watch Yuna with troubled eyes. Sleep, as tired as she was, didn't come to her for a long time.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

6: Haute Couture

The pleasant heat of sunlight warming her cheek half-roused Rikku from her slumber. She sighed and tried to burrow back into her blankets, but the painful crick in her back managed to complete the job of waking her up.

"Oww," Rikku mumbled, rubbing her neck and sitting up slowly. "Either Brother's been hiding rocks in my bed or I've been camping out again…" She opened her eyes and blinked once, then twice, and her good mood evaporated. "Oh poopie," she sighed, taking in her surroundings. So it wasn't a dream after all.

Yuna's bed was already neatly made, and the little girl was nowhere to be found. The curtains had been drawn back, and the rising sun pooled light on the floor around Rikku's makeshift pile of blankets. She blinked and rubbed her eyes again, and then gasped. "Oh my gosh, it's so late! Auron's gonna kill me!" He had always been a stickler for strict schedules during Yuna's Pilgrimage, and she remembered his early-morning lectures to her and Tidus all too well.

Scrambling out of the bed, she grabbed her daggers and attempted to comb her fingers through her messy hair before giving up. She snatched her shoes off the floor and through a miracle of dexterity managed to open the door while sliding a foot into her boot at the same time. Unfortunately, the miracle was short lived and resulted in Rikku hop-crashing into the wall of the outside hallway before falling gracelessly onto her butt. "Ouchie…" she hissed, peeking into the living room to see if anyone had witnessed her moment of clumsiness.

"I can't believe you're a Guardian." Auron's voice was full of scorn and Rikku winced in dismay. Then she relaxed as she heard Jecht respond, realizing that the comment wasn't directed towards her. In fact, her presence hadn't even been detected yet. Pushing herself to her knees, she crawled forward and spied on the two arguing men.

"Well, excuse me," the blitzball player said gruffly. "So we don't have any Summoners in Zanarkand. Big deal!"

Auron was pacing in front of Jecht, looking even grumpier than Lulu before her morning cup of tea. "Zanarkand is the holy city of Summoners. You do realize you're destroying any credibility you have every time you open your mouth."

"I don't see why you're gettin' so worked up over this. So we guard Braska long enough for him to beat down this Sin thing! Seems pretty simple to me. The way you talk, you make it sound like somebody's gonna die!"

Auron's silence was telling, but apparently Jecht wasn't that bright, at least not in the morning. Rikku also noticed that for all his fervor, Auron couldn't be bothered to explain the actual purpose of Braska's Pilgrimage. Or perhaps he simply couldn't bring himself to say it out loud.

"Stop worryin' about it already," Jecht added with a loud laugh. "Now that I'm playin' on your team, this Pilgrimage is gonna be a breeze!"

"How very reassuring," Auron deadpanned. Then he turned and looked at the tuft of yellow hair that was poking over the corner of the wall. "Glad you finally decided to join us," he said to Rikku, who giggled and scrambled to her feet.

"Umm… good morning!" Rikku said, giving the two men a cheerful wave. "Where's Braska and Yunie?"

"Yuna," Auron started, emphasizing her proper name, "is being walked to school by her father. That is the only reason you've been allowed to sleep in today."

"Look out, Auron's a real grouch in the mornin'," Jecht warned her.

"Yeah, I know," Rikku replied, rolling her eyes. Then she coughed delicately. "Uh, I mean, it was pretty obvious, waking up to hear you two argue like that."

"Jecht. We're not finished with this conversation yet. However there are things I must discuss with Rikkma first."

Jecht smirked at Auron and stood up, stretching his arms. "Fine, whatever." He turned to Rikku and tapped her on the shoulder. "Tag, you're it."

"Very funny." Auron strode past them and stood in front of Yuna's bedroom door, waiting for Rikku to join him. "Are you coming?"

"Yeah, yeah, hold your chocobos," Rikku grumbled, grabbing an apple out of the bowl on the table and biting into it. She dragged her feet as she walked towards the room, unwilling to start her day with whatever reprimand she was sure Auron had in store for her.

"Better be good," Jecht called after her. "I don't think Braska would be too happy to come home and find you two doin' the nasty in his kid's room."

Rikku choked on her bite and flushed, then whirled around and sent the half-eaten fruit flying through the air. To her satisfaction, it hit Jecht directly between the eyes with a wet smack and made him double over with a yell of pain. "Screw the apology," she muttered under her breath as she stomped past Auron.

"Hnn," Auron grunted in amusement as he stepped in behind her and shut the door. "So you can make yourself useful sometimes."

"Always nice to see you too, Auron." She felt more than saw Auron's disapproving glare as he looked over the room, and with an annoyed sigh began to gather the wrinkled bed sheets off of the floor and fold them neatly. "So what do you really want, mom?" she asked.

"We need to talk."

"We are talking," Rikku answered smartly, waving the sheet she was holding through the air with a loud snap.

Auron sighed and leaned against the door. "I meant about your reasons for becoming Braska's Guardian."

Rikku slowed down, straightening the creases out of the folded sheet in her hands. "You still don't trust me," she observed, surprised to find that it hurt. The Auron she had known only had to look into her eyes and ask her once.

"You are Al Bhed." He formed the sentence hesitantly, as though he was trying not to be insulting.

But he still said it, Rikku reminded herself, laying the sheet and pillow on Yuna's bed. "And?" she asked, forcing herself not to face him. If he wanted to be dense, she wasn't planning on making it any easier for him.

Auron sighed, and she could almost hear his patience meter running out of gil. "Surely you don't think your people will turn a blind eye to this Pilgrimage. Already they note it because of Braska's presence alone. You must understand what this will mean for you."

Rikku blinked and stared at the wall of Yuna's room in surprise. "W-what?" she asked, wondering if she heard his question correctly.

"You are Al Bhed!" Auron repeated with a note of frustration.

She turned around this time, not trying to hide the shock on her face. "Well, yeah. So I won't be able to go back to them after this." It was easy for her to say, since Rikku knew she wouldn't have been able to return to her people in this time in any case; Auron, however, didn't know that. The bigger mystery was why he even brought it up. She had been expecting him to lecture her on duty, responsibility and trust; she hadn't been expecting him to ask about the effects making a Pilgrimage would have on her personal life. "Why's that a problem?" she asked, and he looked at her as though she had grown another head.

"… What would you do, once this Pilgrimage is over?"

Rikku let herself fall onto Yuna's bed, slumping over and resting her elbows on her knees. "That's a pretty big assumption, you know." Her tone was light, but she kept her expression serious. "How do you know any of us will still be around after Zanarkand?"

Auron frowned and opened his mouth. "Lord Braska -"

"Braska's gonna defeat Sin," Rikku said without hesitation, pinning Auron with a knowing look. "If you didn't believe it too, you wouldn't be his Guardian."

He smiled faintly and looked down, acknowledging her words. "For someone who barely knows him, you place a lot of faith in Braska."

"He has that effect on people," Rikku said, dropping her chin into her hand with a sigh.

Auron shifted, and Rikku's eyebrows raised a millimeter. Did I just make Auron squirm? A smile began to tickle at the corner of her mouth; this morning lecture was going better than she could have hoped.

"While I find your dedication to be…" he hesitated, frowning to himself. "… admirable, I still don't see where it's coming from." Auron studied her. "I don't understand you. Therefore, I can't trust you."

"But you trust Jecht?" Rikku asked.

Auron snorted and shook his head. "I wouldn't go so far as to say I trust him. Jecht, however, is transparent. You are not."

"You have worse vision with two eyes than you do with one," Rikku muttered to herself.

"What?" Auron gave her a strange look, and Rikku shrugged at him.

"Nothing!" she chirped. "Listen, Auron… I can't tell you why I wanna do this. I can't even tell you that I'll stick around for the entire Pilgrimage," she said honestly. "I will promise you that while I'm here, though, I'll do everything I can to keep Braska safe from harm. I know what the code of the Guardian means. Protect the Summoner even at the cost of one's own life. I won't mess it up."

Auron fell silent, but Rikku knew he still wasn't convinced. She decided to try an old favorite. "I've decided to be Braska's guardian, and that's all I want." Rikku held her breath.

"Nothing for yourself, then?" Auron asked her. "You're willing to throw your lot in with us and forget the rest of the world while you're at it? A noble sacrifice without any ulterior motivations, I'm sure," he said shrewdly. "That's hardly a convincing reason for us to trust you."

Rikku's face dropped and she kicked at the floor. "But it should be enough," she said. She glanced up; Auron was still leaning against the door, frowning. She realized he was trying to understand her, at least somewhat; had he been completely disinterested in making an effort, he would have simply left the room. Still, he was rigid in his beliefs, and could only bend so far. Destroying his faith in Yevon would have helped immensely, but Rikku didn't want to be the one to break him. This Auron was just as driven as the one she knew, but he was still missing something… the bitter cynicism, but also the tolerant understanding that had grown from it. This young, unblemished Auron was much more brittle; if he was to learn that his faith was built on a lie, she suspected he would shatter.

I'm just as much of a coward as he is, she realized. He doesn't want to tell Jecht about Sin, and I can't tell him about Yevon. For some reason, the knowledge brought her a strange sense of comfort; he wasn't yet The Legendary Guardian, all knowing and unapproachable; he was simply a man trying to protect his friend. Maybe… I should try trusting him first.

"I… I can't go back," she told him haltingly. Well, it was the truth, in a way. "I can't go back to the Al Bhed right now, and I don't want to, either." She felt Auron looking at her and she picked at her nails. "I don't know if I'll ever be able to go back," she admitted reluctantly. "So I've been searching for something to believe in - something to live for. I've been looking for my own story." Also the truth. "And then I found Braska, and I'm just sorta thinking… maybe this is it, you know? Maybe this is what I've been looking for." She swallowed and cursed silently for betraying herself not once, but twice. I don't believe in sacrificing Summoners! But… but… "… I believe in him. I believe in Braska. That's why."

Auron seemed to consider her words, then shook his head with a quiet sigh. "Fine. I suppose you can stay, but I'll need to know what skills you can bring to the party."

Hey, he's letting me stay. He's really letting me stay! A huge smile broke over Rikku's face and she leapt off of the bed and began to dance. "You already know I'm a thief!" she said, waving her hand in the air. "If you need some items, then I'm your gal!"

"Hnn," Auron replied, amused by her antics. "I suppose that could be useful. So long as you only steal from fiends," he added strictly, causing Rikku to pout. "Can you actually fight with those?" he asked, inclining his head towards her crossed daggers.

"Well," Rikku said, scratching her chin with a nervous smile. In truth, she could fight with them, though in a fair battle she still preferred a fighting claw and targe. Then again, since Shinra had invented the garment grid, Rikku had never bothered to fight any of her battles fairly. "I can take care of myself," she assured Auron. "You guys won't have to worry about guarding me on top of Braska." Seeing the skeptical expression on his face, Rikku rolled her eyes and shrugged. "I can cast, alright? I'm sorta good with black magic." She bit her lip and smiled; that lie was almost as big as Lulu's chest. Auron seemed to buy it, however, looking relieved.

"Good. Dedication is fine, but I still won't allow Braska to bring along dead weight on something as serious as a Pilgrimage." He reached out to open the door and stopped when he heard Rikku titter dangerously. Looking over his shoulder, he scowled at her. "What are you laughing about now?"

"Dead weight!" she snorted, pointing at him. Finally bringing her breath under control, she smirked and brushed past Auron, trying to wipe the smile off of her face. "You wouldn't understand."

He shut the door behind him, and Rikku smirked when she heard him grumbling to himself. "…is a bad idea…" he was saying. "Rikkma," he called to her. "Just stay away from any more fighting than absolutely necessary."

"Ohh! That's so sweet, Auron!" Rikku teased, batting her eyelashes at him. "I didn't know you cared so much about me!"

"I don't," Auron answered with a glare. "I just think it's a bad idea to combine magic usage with mental infirmity."

Rikku stuck her tongue out at him and dashed into the living room. She pulled up short as she saw Braska there, fully bedecked in his usual travelling outfit and arguing with Jecht. "Hey, you can start the party now, Rikku… ma's here!" she greeted them, bouncing with excitement.

Braska looked inquiringly at her. "Rikkuma?" he repeated with a faint grin.

"Sowwy. I bwit my wip," Rikku fudged. Then she pulled her lower lip out and widened her eyes. "Wanna swee?"

"No thanks," Braska laughed at her. "I was told Auron pulled you aside for one of his lectures. I did not think it was normal for people to come out of those with smiles on their faces."

Jecht smirked and crossed his arms. "Must've been one helluva lecture," he grinned. "Maybe he's the one who bit your lip, eh?"

"Do you want another apple surprise?" Rikku answered hotly, feeling her face heat up.

"Well, will you look at that," Jecht replied, his smirk growing wider. "Now you two really do match."

Rikku's mouth dropped open as she glanced down at her chest. I hate your genes, Father, she thought miserably, noticing just how far the red of her blush carried.

"Jecht." Auron was, thankfully, not looking at her; he seemed to be focusing his Rikku Look completely onto Jecht this time. "The Pilgrimage hasn't even begun yet. Would you at least make an effort to be less irritating." The tone that he stated it in was clearly not a request.

"I call 'em like I see 'em," Jecht replied, unruffled by Auron's threat. He gave Rikku a sly grin. "And there sure is plenty to see right now."

"Ohh!" Rikku yelled at him, crossing her arms over her chest and glaring. "You're such a pervert!"

"Actually," Braska interrupted with a nervous cough. "About your choice of attire, Rikkma…"

The blush disappeared under Rikku's injured pride. Uncle or not, no one criticized her fashion sense. "What's wrong with it, huh?" she asked, planting her hands on her hips.

"Why, nothing of course!" Braska said too quickly, all smiles. "I personally am a fan of Al Bhed fashion. It's very… unique," he added. Rikku only glared at him, not buying his explanation.

" 'ey, there ain't nothin' wrong with showin' a little skin," Jecht replied, perfectly serious. Not that he was one to talk, considering that he preferred to travel in nothing but his overalls. Then again, Rikku wasn't thrilled to have someone like Jecht backing up her side of the argument.

"Yes, you're right, we should be free to wear whatever we deem is appropriate," Braska said soothingly. His words didn't stop him from reaching for the bundles that were sitting on the table and offering one to Rikku and the other to Jecht. "However, since we are inside of Bevelle and planning to visit the temple later today, I thought it might be best if we tried to dress a bit more inconspicuously."

Jecht had already torn open his bundle and unrolled it, and was eyeing the heavy priest's cloak with a look of utter disbelief. "No way in hell," he said flatly, glaring at Braska as he threw the offending cloth onto the floor. "How are people supposed to see my muscles when I'm wearin' this potato sack?"

"That would be the point," Auron cut in, snatching the robe off of the ground and throwing it into Jecht's face with a look of disgust. "Lord Braska is loaning you his personal effects for your own safety. Show a little gratitude!"

"Fine," Jecht mumbled under his breath. "I ain't gonna spend the rest of this trip lookin' like an Auron clone, though," he swore as he shrugged the long red robe over his massive shoulders.

Rikku hastily undid her own package and let out a squeal of delight at the outfit that came tumbling out. "This isn't Bevelle fashion!" she said, shaking out the tasselled vest and short miniskirt. Leather… feathers... buckles… bright dye… work gloves… and lots and lots of pouches! "This is Al Bhed!" she exclaimed, looking up at Braska in surprise.

"It was my wife's," he said carefully. "I hope you do not mind, but I thought it might be more comfortable for you to have something familiar, and you looked about the same size."

"You let your wife dress in that? It doesn't cover much more than what she's wearin' right now!" Jecht complained.

"Shut up, Jecht," Rikku replied by reflex, stroking her fingers across the costume. She never had the chance to get to know her aunt personally, but it didn't change the fact that she was still family.

"You do not have to wear it if you dislike it," Braska told her, looking embarrassed.

"What? Oh! No! No-no-no!" Rikku said, whipping her head around. "I love it! It's perfect! Thank you so much!" She clutched the outfit to her chest and bowed to Braska awkwardly. "I'll go try it on right now!"

Running back to Yuna's room, Rikku slammed the door behind her and peeled off her skimpy yellow skirt and puffed sleeves. Slipping into her aunt's old travelling outfit - she recognized it as such because of the plethora of pouches and loops that had been sewn into the clothing - took slightly longer due to the amount of buckles and straps she had to secure. When she was done, she twirled around and looked at herself in the mirror with a broad smile. The outfit was still scandalous compared to the ultra-conservative trends of the religious majority in Bevelle. It covered a good deal more than her yellow bikini, however; the thick leather padding around her shoulders and elbows even offered a small measure of protection. It was just practical enough for a Pilgrimage, yet still free enough for her to feel like a true Al Bhed. "Perfect," she sighed, hopping around in a little victory dance as she snapped on her garment grid. She threw open the door and raced into the hallway, eager to thank Braska for his unexpected gift.

When she barrelled into the common room, Jecht turned and smiled, giving her a thumbs-up. "Lookin' good!" he said to her. Braska and Auron, however, both froze.

Rikku glanced down self-consciously before looking back up at her other two companions. "Umm… no good?" she asked uncertainly, feeling uncomfortable with their prolonged silence.

"…Raenn," Braska mumbled, staring at her in shock. Then he closed his eyes and shook his head, a pained smile crossing his face. "Remarkable," he uttered. "You look so very much like her." He opened his eyes and gave Rikku a weak smile. "I'm sorry, how rude of me. It does look wonderful on you… Rikkma."

Rikku fell quiet, embarrassed by her new clothing. She snuck a stealthy glance at Auron, who was studying her with a hard stare. "What?" she asked, leaning on her hip and returning his glare.

"She does look like Raenn," Auron noted. "However she only need open her mouth and you can hear the difference."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Rikku asked.

"Raenn had manners," Auron said, looking away. Rikku fumed.

"You are right in a way," Braska agreed as he stood from the table. "I think she sounds more like Cid."

Rikku fell silent with a nervous twitch. What do I do? Should I say anything at all? Ohh… stupid Auron! Stupid Braska! Stupid costume! It was taking enough concentration just to keep her hands from flying to her head and shaking it, and she jumped in surprise as she realized Braska was still speaking, and more importantly to her.

"… too distracting for the priests," he was saying. "I think we will be able to find you something suitable once we reach the marketplace, though."

Still nervous about Braska's sharp observation, Rikku felt her stomach flip-flop at the thought of any sort of delay in her attempt to contact the Fayth. "Wait a sec, what? I thought we were going to the temple this morning!" Rikku complained.

"Yes, we are, but we still need to buy those spheres," Braska reminded her. "Also, Jecht needs a weapon."

The man in question rolled his eyes and scowled at Braska. "You've been arguin' with me about that since yesterday. I already told ya – the only thing I need to score is a blitzball!"

Braska shook his head. "No one has ever heard of using a blitzball as a weapon before, Jecht."

"Umm, actually…" Rikku said with a small laugh, not particularly upset when the guys chose to ignore her contribution to their slowly heating argument.

"See, now you obviously never played blitzball before," Jecht said. "You'd think different if you had one comin' at ya. Just ask Auron."

Auron winced. "Lord Braska is correct. Absolutely no blitzballs on this Pilgrimage."

Jecht threw his arms up and groaned. "Aww, c'mon, Auron, you were wearin' armor!"

"No," he repeated, and Braska gave Jecht a tiny smile of triumph.

"Whatever," Jecht said, dropping his arms in defeat. "But I get to choose my own weapon. And you have to pay for it!" he added petulantly.

Braska nodded and ushered them towards the door. "Let's get started," he said. "It's quite a walk to the marketplace from here." He waited until the others filed out before him, then reached out and caught Rikku's arm, beckoning her to walk at his side. "Rikkma, are there going to be any additional supplies that you need?"

"Oh, you're offering?" Rikku asked with the beginning of a smile. Yes… maybe this won't be a total loss! "The Yevonites stole all my stuff when I got here, so I really could use a few potions and things…" she began.

"No," Auron cut in. Rikku jumped when he appeared at their side; she hadn't even noticed him slowing down to join them.

"What do you mean, no?" she asked. "Excuse me, but I think Braska was asking me the question?"

"Auron, it's really quite all right -" Braska tried.

"She's a thief."

Rikku flushed and grit her teeth. Just when I thought we were starting to get along, too. The way he said it made it sound like an insult. "I steal from fiends," she hissed.

"Therefore you don't need to be wasting our money," Auron told her. "Gather supplies on your own."

"I wonder if you'd still think that when you're sick with poison after getting stung by a Bite Bug, huh? I'm sure you'll say then that we didn't really need that antidote," Rikku sniped.

"Please," Braska cut in. "Auron, leave her alone. This is also a part of my duty as a Summoner, and I do it gladly."

"But my lord -" Auron protested.

"Enough!" Braska commanded, and Auron grimaced and stalked away from them. Braska turned to Rikku with a smile. "I am sorry about that. Auron can be a little overprotective at times, as I am sure you have noticed. Now… what was it again that you said you'd be needing?"

Rikku nibbled on her lip. She realized the reason for Auron's intervention as soon as Braska had mentioned duty. In fact, she was kicking herself for not having thought of it before. It was obvious enough from the slum that he lived in that Braska was not well off; he had fallen out of favor with both the Al Bhed and the Church of Yevon. Yet he doggedly chose to remain in Bevelle, raising Yuna on his own. She winced when she realized how thoughtlessly she had been about to take advantage of Braska's kindness.

"Oh, hey… don't worry about it," Rikku told him, smiling brightly. "I really can gather my own supplies, so you don't need to buy anything." Braska looked like he was about to protest, so Rikku raised her hand and put on a stern expression. "That big ol' butt monkey challenged me, and I have to prove to him that I can do it on my own! My pride is on the line, so don't interfere!"

"Hmm," Braska said, as though he could see through her thin pretence. "Very well. Pride, then. I will, however, still be paying for your robe, so be sure to choose one when we get there."

Rikku nodded in agreement and then scurried ahead of him, slowing down to fall in step beside Auron. "Thanks," she murmured to him under her breath. "I wasn't thinking."

Auron grunted, not bothering to turn to look at her. "Do you ever?" he asked.

"Gee, I love you too," Rikku replied sarcastically before leaving his side. She caught up with Jecht, who stopped when the street spilled open into the larger square. Bevelle's marketplace was bustling, jam-packed with people. He was looking at the motley collection of merchants and shoppers with a mixture of surprise and awe. "Hey, better close your mouth or everyone'll know you're a tourist and charge us twice as much!" Rikku scolded him.

"Damn," Jecht said, rubbing the back of his head as his eyes travelled over the multi-coloured tents and stalls. "We don't have anything like this in Zanarkand."

Rikku followed his gaze and silently agreed with Jecht; Bevelle's market square was an impressive sight even for Spirans. Before Sin was defeated, Bevelle had been Spira's largest city; it still was, though Luca came in a close second. That cheerful port city had always remained more of a seasonal gathering place for Blitzball enthusiasts, however, than a permanently urban setting like Bevelle. There was still nothing comparable to the sight of so many people gathered together to buy and trade in the open-air market even in Rikku's recent memory. It was without a doubt Spira's largest commercial center. "This is gonna be great," she cheered to herself, hopping eagerly in place.

"Don't lag behind," Auron told them as he passed the two with Braska. "If either of you get lost, we won't come looking for you."

"Gotcha!" Rikku yelled, already dashing towards the first stall to root through the wares offered there. She lost interest in the cheap trinkets quickly and raced to another stall, fingering the brightly-dyed fabric that was hanging in strips before the tent. A wry laugh caught her attention, and she released the cloth and looked over her shoulder to see Jecht smirking at her.

"This must be some kinda universal truth," he grumbled with amusement. "Women and shoppin' - alone they're fine, but combine 'em and you got man's worst nightmare."

"Hey!" Rikku said with a small pout, jogging back to his side so they could catch up with the others. She slowed her pace, remembered why she had originally sought him out and sucked in her breath. "Umm… sorry, by the way."

Jecht gave her a surprised glance and scratched his head. "For what?" he asked.

"You know!" Rikku replied, exasperated. "Yesterday… I mean what I said about abandoning your son. That was wrong of me, okay?" She peered at Jecht from the corner of her eye, trying to gauge his reaction.

Jecht's face tightened, but he sighed and shrugged at Rikku. "No harm, no foul," he told her offhandedly before moving away.

Rikku almost tripped over her own feet. That easy? she thought suspiciously. But I thought he really did love Tidus… She thought of Auron's appraisal of Jecht and studied him. Auron said he was transparent… is he, though, really? He certainly seemed like a simpleton, smiling lazily and heckling Auron to buy him a jug of whiskey when they passed a liquor stall. If Jecht was really upset about being separated from his own family, he certainly hid it well.

But he does care, Rikku reminded herself, filing his carefree behavior away for closer inspection later on. I won't be making any more assumptions about Sir Jecht from now on, no-siree! A flash of silver in one of the stalls caught her eye, and her introspective analysis fled out the window in favor of something much more important.

"Ooh! Pretties!" Rikku squealed, approaching the jewellery stall. "C'mon guys, can't we stop for just a little?"

The other men paused to look at her in dismay. "Universal, I tell ya," Jecht said as they watched Rikku paw through the hapless vendor's inventory with the eagerness of a child in a candy store.

"Perhaps it wasn't the wisest decision to bring her along for the supply trip," Braska noted.

"Women," Auron observed in disgust. "I'll get her." As he strode towards the stall, Braska casually turned to Jecht.

"I was married for two years," he murmured. "You?"

"Nine," Jecht replied, watching as Auron and Rikku began to argue with a knowing look in his eye. "Well, he's the one who was dumb enough to make the approach. I say it's his own fault, so we can make him carry the bags."

"Agreed," Braska replied with an amused laugh. "Poor fellow."

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

7: Machina Machinations

Rikku smirked, juggling her purchases in her hands. The argument with Auron had been fierce but in the end, she'd won; he was now sulking and trailing at the back of their little group. To be fair, she hadn't bought all that much; as he heatedly reminded her, she avoided any trouble that might have resulted by stealing from the vendors. It was also painfully clear that Braska had limited funds. Though Auron agreed to the necessity of arming their small party with the proper equipment, difficulties arose when she tried to convince him that her small selection of jewellery was meant for anything other than vanity.

Braska finally intervened when their argument grew loud enough to draw notice, paying the confused merchant for Rikku's selections before either could object. And to Rikku's great embarrassment, they'd cost more than expected. She was a thief, after all, and could more or less guess the state of gil in Braska's small pouch of money both before and after her purchases. The size of the purse dwindled significantly after they picked up a few recording spheres, and Rikku was seriously considering breaking her promise not to steal as the morning progressed.

She ran a finger over the smooth metal of the bracelet that jangled on her wrist; it was just large enough to work a few protective wards in with the proper equipment. Releasing the bracelet, she studied her next purchase - a heavy silver necklace chosen with Jecht in mind. As of yet it was little more than a chain and a silver disc; she knew that had she bought him a bracelet like her own, he would have deemed it much too girly to wear. Tidus had no trouble with necklaces, so she hoped his father wouldn't object too strongly.

"I'll just have to be careful when I carve it," she mumbled to herself, slipping the necklace into one of her pockets. For Braska, she picked out a plain circlet; it would be the hardest of the pieces to customize, but she was sure she could attach it to his helmet with a little work. The question was how to tactfully get her hands on said helmet without him noticing. As she tucked away her purchases, she looked over her shoulder at Auron. His head was down and he still looked extremely pissed off. He was the only person she hadn't been able to find something for. He'd already donned his usual armored bracer anyway, and Rikku wasn't certain she could actually convince him to wear anything, especially if it was coming as a gift from her.

I'll just have to steal his bracer one of these days and work with it. Oh boy, I bet that'll be loads of fun.

"Rikkma?" Braska shook her out of her thoughts. "You need to choose a robe."

Looking up, Rikku realized they'd stopped in front of a cloth merchant. Several fine robes were prominently displayed on hooks before the tent, and she frowned as she studied them. "Umm, Braska," she mumbled. It wasn't that she minded shopping for clothes; these robes, however, were richly brocaded and made of fine silks. They were both very beautiful and obviously expensive. "None of these look really…" She stopped herself from saying affordable just in time. "… comfortable, you know."

Braska read her easily enough. "Rikkma," he addressed her with a stern look. "You need to dress more appropriately for the temple. I already told you that I would be happy to pay for your robe. Will you not try at least one?"

The vendor inside of the tent capitalized on Braska's request, pulling down a deep blue robe and offering it to Rikku. "I assure you, you won't find robes more comfortable than these in the entire district!" he told her.

Rikku wrinkled her nose at the cloth that was pushed into her hands, not really wanting to try on any of sort of formal dress but unwilling to hurt her uncle's feelings with a direct refusal. "Well, actually…" she mumbled, kicking her feet into the ground.

"Please, Rikkma," Braska pressed.

Rikku considered the robe. It wasn't all that bad; of course, the garment was patterned in a traditional Bevelle cut, meaning she would have to 'tailor' it to suit her own needs as soon as they were out of town anyway. Still… it was a very pretty shade of blue…

"Blue was Raenn's favorite colour," she heard Auron mutter.

She stiffened and let the fabric fall from her fingers, pushing it back towards the merchant. Then she looked at Braska. He was staring at Auron, who she just knew was returning the look. The two men seemed to be locked in a silent battle of wills, one she had somehow unwittingly instigated. Finally Braska looked at Rikku, a gentle smile gracing his face; it was an abrupt change from the silent tension that had pulled at his features just moments before.

"Whatever Rikkma wishes to wear is her own choice, of course."

Rikku swallowed and could practically feel Auron's glare shift from Braska onto the back of her neck. She snuck a glance at him and winced; the expression on his face went beyond any simple Rikku Look. This one was accusing and also slightly threatening. It didn't take a genius to figure out why; he was trying to protect Braska, both financially and emotionally. That he saw her as a threat, however, sparked a tiny frown of resentment.

"I can't help it if I look like her," Rikku mumbled under her breath, glaring at Auron before pushing past him into the tent. She scanned over the racks of clothing, ignoring the fawning vendor as she searched for the cheapest, ugliest-looking not blue robe she could find. Finally, she settled on a plain brown lump of cloth stuffed away behind the other finery. Without even trying it on, she pulled it out and shoved it into the merchant's waiting hands. "This one is perfect," she grumbled.

"B-but … that one isn't even finished!" he complained.

"Then I'm sure you'll be able to give us an appropriate discount," Auron interrupted, giving the merchant a stern look.

The small man huffed and glared at Auron. "300 gil," he said reluctantly.

"What!" Rikku yelled, snatching the robe out of the man's hands. She shimmied into it and turned around. "300 gil for this? Look, it doesn't even have sleeves!" she seethed.

"250 gil," the merchant replied with a wince.

"Sir," Auron said coldly, "Do you take us for fools? That sackcloth that you claim to be a garment is clearly worth no more than 50 gil."

It was about then that Rikku realized that Auron was playing her kind of game. Her anger evaporated and she gave him a mischievous smile, to which he replied with a slightly raised eyebrow.

"F-fifty - why, you thieves! You charlatans! I'll have you know that my family has tailored for the High Priests of Yevon for over twenty years!" the merchant sputtered.

At this point, even Braska had caught on, and folding his arms serenely, he gave the merchant a thoughtful smile. "Ah… for such a reputable tailor, you certainly do protest very loudly," he observed.

"What's the hold up?" Jecht grumbled from outside of the tent. "If this guy's sellin' duds, let's just go somewhere else!"

"A reasonable suggestion for once," Auron answered. "As he is the personal tailor to the High Priests of Yevon, I'm sure our business isn't needed here." He turned to walk away.

"125 gil!" the merchant yelled out with a note of desperation. "But absolutely no less than that!"

"Hnn," Auron said, pausing.

"I suppose that sounds reasonable," Braska replied cheerfully, and both Auron and Rikku winced. Eager as he might have been to learn, Braska clearly still needed a few lessons in the fine art of street haggling. "Is this what you want, Rikkma?" he asked her.

"Well," Rikku hummed uncertainly, picking at the robe. The deal was still salvageable, she supposed. Besides, no risk, no rewards! "If you ask me, I'd only shell out 100 gil for this thing."

"125 is my final -"

"… and I promise not to dance through the streets telling people where I bought it from," Rikku added. She directed a saccharine smiled towards the merchant. "I'm a really good dancer, you know?"

"She's also very loud," Auron added. "Believe me."

"100 gil. And I don't ever want to see your faces again," the vendor blustered. He snatched the money out of Braska's hands and all but pushed them out of his tent with a dark scowl.

When they were a safe distance away, Rikku skipped up to Auron and held up her hand with a triumphant smile. "High five!" she yelled at him, and rolled her eyes in exasperation when he only stared at her outstretched palm.

"I think I should leave you two in charge of the shopping from now on," Braska noted from behind them with a grin.

"Thank you my lord," Auron said. "Though this subterfuge wouldn't have been necessary had we allotted our funds more carefully." This was directed at Rikku.

"How much do we have left?"

Braska stopped and reached into the pouch to count his coins, and Rikku winced again. Counting his money in the open in the middle of the market… She leaned in towards Auron.

"Is he always this bad?" she whispered.

"Mmm-hmm," Auron answered her. "Lord Braska tends to see only the best in others. That is why he needs protection, not only from fiends." Then he paused and looked at her, really looked, and she squirmed uncomfortably. "Rikkma. He loved his wife very much. Be… careful with him."

Rikku turned and looked at Braska, who had finished counting his money. She returned his smile when he looked up and cringed internally. "I'm a Guardian," she said out loud. "I'll keep him safe… even if he doesn't want me to."

"As will I," Auron replied smoothly; statement, promise and threat all in one.

"I'm afraid we have a little problem," Braska said, interrupting their conversation. "There isn't enough left to purchase a proper weapon for you," he told Jecht.

Jecht shrugged and didn't appear to be particularly displeased by the news. "Cry me a river," he mumbled.

"Well, why don't we just go to the temple and get this over with, then?" Rikku suggested. "We're all decked out now, and there shouldn't be any fiends waiting in there for us, right?"

Braska sighed and nodded. "Yes… we've spent enough time here. Let us head towards the temple." He turned to lead them through the crowds, but Rikku lingered behind, feeling guilty.

She made the suggestion on a whim, but the words had sobered Braska instantly. He almost seemed to be enjoying himself in the marketplace with them up to that point, and she knew she had inadvertently reminded him of his duty. They weren't simply friends who were sharing a vacation together, but a Summoner and his Guardians, preparing for a gruelling trip that would have little chances for respite such as Bevelle's open-air market offered. She looked at the ground, trying to remind herself that she shouldn't be getting involved. A pair of heavy boots entered her vision; they stopped beside her own.

"Braska chose his own path long ago. All we can do is follow." The boots moved away.

"I know," Rikku muttered, scurrying after him.

.x.x.x.

"So this is a temple?" Jecht said, his loud voice echoing through the high-domed ceiling. "Where're all the priests? Where's the altar?"

They were standing at the top of the huge spiral staircase inside of Bevelle's temple; the steps led down, down, deep into the darkness. Unlike the last time Rikku remembered, the controls for the elevator were also carefully obscured, covered with heavy brocaded cloths and ornamental hangings.

"The altar is in the center of the shrine," Braska replied, starting down the winding staircase. "However, only Summoners are allowed to enter the Chamber of the Fayth."

"Well, what's a Fayth?" Jecht asked, following him.

"Do you hear this song in the air? It is the Hymn of the Fayth," Braska explained. "They are the souls of those who dedicated their lives to battling Sin long ago. They sleep eternally, trapped in statues of stone, waking only when called forth by a Summoner. And while they dream, they sing to us."

Jecht grew unusually quiet, and the Hymn swelled around them. Auron followed the other two men down the staircase. He turned and regarded Rikku, who was leaning over the railing and looking into the darkness below.

"It's such a long way down," she whined, shooting a wistful glance at the control panel.

"Then stay up here," Auron grumped, turning on his heel and following Braska.

"Meanie," Rikku muttered to herself, sprinting down the stairs past Auron. She passed Jecht, and even breezed by Braska, who looked on in surprise.

"Rikkma," he called out after her. "Please be careful. We don't know what's waiting for us at the bottom."

Some of us do, Rikku thought to herself. "I'll be fine!" she yelled up, leaning over the staircase and waving at the men above her. She wanted to get through the Trials as quickly as possible; every memory she had of descending into the bowels of the earth underneath Bevelle had ended up unpleasantly, without exception. "The sooner this is over, the better," she observed.

Torches flared to life with each step she took, illuminating the staircase with their flickering light. It was a rather impressive, mystical effect, or at least it would have been, had Rikku not been searching for the pressure panels in the floor that activated the mechanisms to light them. As it was, she was keeping herself amused by trying to race down the staircase more quickly than the torches could be lit. That of course meant that she was sprinting blindly into the yawning darkness. And, as she managed to catch her boot on one of the steps and go tumbling forward, she realized that it might not have been one of her better ideas. With a loud yelp, she went tumbling; instinctively rolling into a protective ball, she punctuated each bounce and slap as she hit the hard ground with a loud "OWW!" or "OUCH!" Fortunately, she was already near bottom of the stairs, so her fall was rather short. Unfortunately, her yells were loud enough to carry upwards very clearly.

"Rikkma! Are you all right?" Braska yelled, picking up his robes and hurrying his descent. Auron also picked up the pace, but it was Jecht who actually beat them both, being the quickest of the men. He was, in fact, fast enough to emulate Rikku's step hopping trip, and as he neared her, another loud yell was heard, followed by a few thumps and muffled cursing.

"OWW!" Rikku yelled at the top of her lungs, kicking Jecht off of her. "Did you have to land on top of me?"

"Quit complainin'!" Jecht groused, sitting up and rubbing his head. "I wouldn't have fallen if you hadn't first."

"Neither of you would have fallen if you paid any attention to your surroundings," Auron told them both. Seeing that they were uninjured, he redirected his attention to the glowing veil of blue energy that sealed off the entrance to the Cloister. "The Trials are beyond," he said, turning around and facing the others. "Lord Braska… are you ready?"

Braska stopped before the entrance and held his hands together, dipping in a respectful bow of prayer which parted the glowing curtain. Rikku and Jecht stood behind him, watching. Jecht leaned over towards Rikku and whispered to her under his breath.

"Hey, Blondie. What's a trial?"

Rikku rolled her eyes. "My name's not Blondie, you know. It's… " She paused and considered the alternative. "… alright if you call me that, though," she finished.

Jecht stared at her for a moment and then shrugged. Apparently he was getting used to her lunatic behavior and passing it off as normal, she noted with some embarrassment. "Trials?" he reminded her. "Is this gonna be some kinda test?" He cracked his knuckles.

"We don't know what awaits us inside," Auron replied, slinging his sword off of his back and hefting it over his shoulder.

"I hardly think the temples would attempt to kill off their potential Summoners during the Trials, Auron," Braska chided him, stepping forward. He stopped when Auron held out an arm to block him.

"Let me go first." Without waiting for a reply, Auron turned and strode through the doorway.

Rikku, who already knew what was coming, crossed her arms and waited. Auron didn't come out immediately, and she wondered what was keeping him. Braska shifted, his long robes rustling and Jecht stretched and yawned. The seconds ticked by, and Rikku began to tap her foot. Braska cleared his throat. Finally, Jecht, picking at his ear, strolled past Braska.

"Jecht, do you think it's wise to -" Braska started.

"Sick of waitin'," he grunted as explanation, walking through the portal carelessly.

Rikku was hot on Jecht's heels, and she gave Braska a bright smile, pulling him through after her. "Hey, like you said! I bet it's perfectly safe inside!"

"But…" Despite Braska's protests, he allowed himself to be dragged along.

"Whoa!" Jecht's loud exclamation quickened both of their paces; Rikku and Braska rounded the corner to see Jecht and Auron standing side by side, staring at Bevelle's Cloister of Trials.

Auron was motionless, his eyes wide and his face pale.

"This is awesome!" Jecht said, turning to face them. "I don't think I ever saw anything like this, not even in Zanarkand!" He pointed over his shoulder.

Braska, who drew to a stop alongside him, was also speechless. Curious at their silence, Rikku crept up and peered between them.

Looming out before them was the vast, seemingly bottomless pit of the Cloister. The moving walkways of light that pulsed and crisscrossed through the air emitted a harsh glow against the encroaching darkness. It was a strange and beautiful symphony of light and electronics, and Rikku took a moment to appreciate the skill it took to construct such a labyrinth. Just like I remember, she thought with satisfaction. Then she turned to Auron and quirked an eyebrow. "What's wrong with you?"

Auron said nothing, still staring wide-eyed at the multitude of glowing pathways. Growing a little concerned, she reached over and poked his arm. Since that didn't produce a reaction, she frowned and pinched him. Hard. He hissed and drew away, coming out of his stupor to glare at her. "Welcome back!" Rikku grinned at him, waving. "Where the heck were you?"

Auron looked around, spotting Jecht and Braska, who had torn their eyes away from the pit to stare at him. He grimaced and avoided looking at the labyrinth. "Machina…" he muttered in shock.

Uh-oh, Rikku thought to herself.

" 'ey, it's a good light show, even I'll admit that, but it ain't that great," Jecht told him, scratching his head. "What's machina anyway?"

"Machina is forbidden by Yevon!" Auron answered, his eyes snapping back to the walkway.

"Yevon this, Yevon that," Jecht grumbled. "That ain't no answer!"

"Perhaps… it is only magic?" Braska interjected with a note of hope, squinting at the pulsing lights. Then he turned to Rikku. "The Al Bhed are more familiar with machina than any other people. Perhaps you could tell us?"

Jecht turned to her and crossed his arms. "Machina?" he repeated.

Rikku laughed nervously and rubbed the back of her head. How to answer this one… She decided to tackle Jecht first. "Machina are old pieces of equipment that we Al Bhed try to salvage and use," she said. "Yevon sorta doesn't like it when we do that, because they're a bunch of stuffy old poops who think we should depend on them for everything instead of working for ourselves!"

"That is not entirely correct," Braska said. "The forbidden technology housed in machina is what brought about Sin. If we repent and abstain from its use, one day Sin will disappear, and the world will know peace."

"That's a lie!" Rikku cried out before she could stop herself. "There are no bad machina, just bad people who use them! Well, okay, maybe there are one or two bad machina out there," she amended, her eyes darting to the pit underneath the glowing labyrinth. Somewhere down there Vegnagun is still sleeping… "But my point is just because Yevon says it's bad, doesn't mean you can blame machina for all of our problems!"

"Huh," Jecht replied, scratching his chin. "So these Yevon folks go around tellin' people not to use machina, and you Al Bhed type go around usin' them anyway, and that's why they hate ya?"

"Something like that," Rikku agreed.

"So you're Al Bhed," Jecht repeated. Seeing Rikku nod, he turned to Auron. "And you're one of these Yevon guys," he added, receiving a glare in response. "I think I like the Al Bhed better," he said.

"No one asked for your opinion," Auron snapped out.

"All I'm sayin' is we got this 'machina' comin' outta our ears in Zanarkand and there sure as heck wasn't anything like Sin botherin' us there. Maybe a fiend or two every once a while, but that's all."

"But I thought it was Sin that brought you here," Braska said.

"Yeah, well…" Jecht trailed off uncertainly. Then he gestured at the glowing walkway. "That sure looks like machina to me. You tell me what this forbidden machina is doin' in a temple of Yevon, and maybe I can come up with a reason for Sin bein' in Zanarkand."

Rikku's eyes flickered back to Auron's face; once again he was staring at the labyrinth, his mouth drawn into a thin line. She winced and drummed her fingers together. No. They're not ready for this. Then she took a deep breath.

"It's not machina."

Everyone turned towards her, Jecht looking like he was about to protest. Rikku held up her hand and gave him a stern glance. "Listen. I am Al Bhed. And we know machina better than anyone else in all of Spira. I'm telling you, no matter what it looks like, that," she emphasized, pointing, "is not machina. It's just not possible!"

"Are you sure?" Braska asked, though he couldn't hide the expression of relief on his face. More importantly, Auron was staring at her now. Strangely, as little as he seemed to enjoy her presence, he was hanging on her every word. In a way, he was depending on her, his so-called enemy, to tilt his world back onto its proper axis.

Sometimes I really hate myself. Rikku scowled. But I'll always hate Yevon more. "It's not machina," she repeated. "Maybe it's some kind of summon or something."

"Well… I suppose that is that," Braska said, smiling and returning his attention to the labyrinth.

"… yes," Auron replied, tearing his gaze away from Rikku and back towards the Cloister. "Yet another one of Yevon's tests," he muttered with disgust. His face was still haunted, but some of the stiffness slipped away from his shoulders.

Huh, Rikku thought. Maybe he's not such a big Yevonite after all. She let out a tiny sigh of relief and looked away, only to squawk and jerk back as Jecht's face appeared directly in front of her. He wasn't quite as angry as when she had mentioned Tidus to him, but he definitely looked far from pleased.

"What're you playin' at?" he mumbled, careful to keep his voice from carrying over to the others.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Rikku squeaked.

"You know well as I do that ain't magic," he said, gesturing at the walkway.

Rikku narrowed her eyes. "It has to be for now," she whispered to him. Then her expression turned pleading. "Just let it slide, alright? Can't you see they need this?"

Jecht glanced over his shoulder at the two men, who were obviously trying to figure out their next move, and then shook his head in disbelief. "And they're callin' me slow," he said under his breath. "This is one messed up place, man." Then he loomed over her.

"What?" Rikku asked, taking another step back.

"Well, Blondie. You can bat those eyelashes and tell 'em all the little stories you want." He snorted and looked her over. "But I ain't like them. I don't give a crap who this Raenn person was, and I know a lie when I see one. I'll be watchin' you," he warned her. "You try and double-cross us and I'll personally make sure you regret it."

Rikku blinked in surprise. "Wow, you're really getting into this Guardian stuff," she said after a moment.

Jecht straightened up and scratched his head, surprised by Rikku's lack of fear. Then again, he couldn't know that he didn't seem very scary to her. After having fought and killed an incarnation of him that was about three times the size of most of the buildings in Bevelle and wielding a sword to boot, there wasn't very much this Jecht could do that she would find intimidating. She was surprised to find that The Lecture she'd been expecting all day was popping out of Jecht's mouth instead of Auron's, though.

"That's a good thing," she reassured him when his confused look began to drop into a scowl. "I'm a Guardian too, remember? I'm here to guard Braska, not hurt him." Then she gave him a tiny smile. "I'm just doing it my own way. I'm… glad, kinda, to hear you just wanna protect him too."

Jecht shrugged. "He's my ticket back to Zanarkand. 'Course I gotta look after him." Then he shot her another sideways glance. "You are one weird chick." He pointed at his massive, tattooed chest. "I don't scare you at all?" He sounded almost disappointed. Rikku snickered, and Jecht sulked. "Damn! I gotta work on my image."

"You do that." Rikku jogged over to Braska and Auron, who were hovering around the freestanding pillar on the platform. "Hey," she complained to them in a singsong voice. "Jecht's thinking too hard over there and the smell of burning hair is starting to get to me. You guys figure out anything yet?"

"Well," Braska said with frown, "the lights appear to be moving pathways, but they will not hold any solid weight. There must be a way to travel on it."

"I believe it has something to do with this," Auron added, pushing at the pillar, which slid forward easily.

Rikku considered remaining silent and letting the men solve the labyrinth on their own. That would be the fair thing to do, she knew; using her own knowledge would be cheating somehow. And Yevon knows we shouldn't cheat, Rikku thought.

"What, this old thing?" she said, tripping past Auron and slamming into the pillar. Her not-so-subtle push sent it flying over the edge of the stone platform and into the moving path of light, and both Auron and Braska let out a yell of dismay as it fell through. "Oopsie," she giggled, then put on her best surprised expression as the pillar melted into a large disc which hovered over the path. "Well will you look at that!" she cooed.

"Truly amazing magic," Braska murmured in awe.

"Hnn," Auron agreed, sounding distinctly less than amazed. "We still don't know that it's safe."

"Well, there's only one way to find out," Rikku cheered, preparing to spring onto the disc.

"Alright! Surfin'!" Jecht roared as he landed on the disc ahead of her.

Double damn those Blitzball reflexes! Rikku growled to herself as the disc took off with a laughing Jecht on it. "Get back here Jecht! He doesn't even know what he's doing!" she groaned in frustration as the disc whizzed out of sight.

"Touching as your concern for his safety is," Auron noted, still wary of the path, "we have no idea where he -" His sentence ended abruptly as a soft hissing was heard. A sphere pillar faded into view where the old one once stood. No one noticed Rikku discreetly plugging her ears.

"AHH!" Jecht's materialization over the platform was heralded by his loud yell. He landed on the ground face-first. Standing slowly, he wobbled, his eyes unfocused. "I gotta stop doin' that."

"I fear this may be more complicated than I first thought," Braska said. "What happened? What did you see?"

"Damn thing's fast," Jecht managed to grunt. "Lights… lotsa turns… and the drop-off at the end's a real bitch."

"But it did bring you back safely," Braska noted with a determined expression. He leaned over and pushed the pillar back onto the walkway, and the disc reformed.

"Surely you aren't thinking of using it!" Auron protested. "Look at what it did to Jecht!" The man in question's eyes crossed as he slumped to the ground.

Rikku rolled her eyes. "I don't see a difference from normal."

"Perhaps it requires the talent of a Summoner to function properly," Braska said, stepping towards the disc. He paused and bowed before it with a resolute expression.

"Umm…" Rikku said, scratching her cheek.

"Have faith, Rikkma," Braska assured her with a warm smile. Then he stepped onto the disc. With a soft whoosh, it disappeared from sight… though Braska's surprised yell at the speed with which it jumped into motion didn't fade quite as quickly.

Rikku winced and surreptitiously brought her fingers back towards her ears. To his credit, Braska didn't shout quite as loudly as Jecht had. He crashed to the ground in a tangle of robes in front of them.

"I think… this will take more… than just faith," Braska mumbled, casting a healing spell over himself. Then he smiled wryly at Auron and Rikku. "So who will be the next victim of this Trial?"

Auron paled, but shoved the pillar onto the walkway with a grim expression. "This is not a good idea." He approached the floating disc.

Rikku silently agreed; Bevelle's Cloister had been difficult enough for Yuna's large party to unravel, and right now they were only four. Thinking back on it, she realized it might have taken even longer for them to solve had it not been for Auron's subtle assistance.

Except now he's not here… I am. Rikku wasn't entirely sure this Auron would have accepted any help from her under normal circumstances; however, he still appeared to be rather shaken by the unexpected presence of the "non-machina" inside the temple. He hesitated in front of the floating disc, displaying his reluctance to board it.

Jecht, who had recovered with the help of one of Braska's Cures, let out a hearty laugh. "Well ain't this a first! The great and mighty Auron's actually scared of a little joyride! Rikkma, you should be recordin' this!"

Auron's jaw clenched and he stepped onto the disc. It drifted away from the others at the same rapid pace as before.

"Right!" Rikku yelled, dashing towards the walkway and leaping. She slammed into a very surprised Auron and nearly pushed them both over the edge. The gamble was worth it, however, as Auron's arms reflexively wrapped around her and they fell to their knees, off-balance.

Her nose was pushing into his armored chest, but she ignored the awkward position in favor of inhaling deeply. Wow… he smells really good, she noted, enjoying the feel of his arms when they tightened around her. The disc was moving rapidly, creating a pleasant breeze which tugged at her hair. It was barely enough to cool her skin, though, which seemed to be overheating while in such close proximity to him -

"Rikkma!" Auron's tense yell, underlined with a note of panic cleaved through her short-lived fantasy, and she realized they were still moving very quickly. It was vertigo, rather than passion, that was causing Auron to cling to her. And, to her own rising dismay, they'd already whisked more than three-fourths of the way down the lit path. The drop-off was approaching too quickly for her liking, and they weren't even on their feet.

"Get off of me!" Rikku yelled, recognizing the last floating checkpoint that they were about to sail over. Out of sheer desperation, she slammed her palms as hard as she could onto the pad, not caring which direction the glowing arrows pointed. With a sudden lurch, the disc came to a halt, and Rikku let out a sigh of relief. Then her stomach leapt into her throat as the disc shot off into the small, dark alcove she had inadvertently steered them into.

Rikku grabbed onto Auron when she felt him sway; besides the fact that he smelled good, she really didn't want him to fall to his death. Her firm grip was broken when the disc spilled them unceremoniously onto solid ground and then shimmered, reforming once more as a solid pillar. She rolled over with a grunt, willing the room to stop spinning. I almost forgot how much I hate this place. Hearing a groan, she cracked her eye open and turned her head in the direction it came from.

Auron was sprawled face down on the stone, not looking much better off. Some of his long hair had been knocked free of his impeccable ponytail; two dark strands framed his strong features like jagged spikes over each cheek.

Somehow, it underlined his strange youthfulness that still took her by surprise; a good part of the older Auron's allure had been the mystery that was hiding behind his sunglasses and high collar. The young Auron was blatantly more beautiful to look at. Had he shown any interest in Blitzball at all, Rikku was sure he would've become a star player just for his looks alone. Unfortunately, that dream-inducing face was currently flushed an interesting shade of greenish-white, made all the more eerie by the lack of natural light. The neon glow of the walkway was the only illumination available, making him look even more gaunt.

"Hey, are you okay?" Rikku asked, crawling over to him.

Auron pushed himself up to his knees and leaned back on his heels, dropping his eyes closed. "I need… a moment," he managed to say.

Rikku scooted away from him and studied their surroundings. She recognized where they'd landed when she spotted the empty socket in the wall. There's nothing we can do here until we find a Bevelle sphere. Trying to give Auron the privacy he needed to compose himself, she busied herself with the needless task of inspecting the wall socket anyway. Glancing over her shoulder when she heard the soft rustle of cloth, she watched Auron stand.

"… Thank you for your discretion," he told her, clearly uncomfortable. Then he took in their surroundings. "How did we end up here?"

"Well, umm… we were going really fast, and there was this flashy light thingy on the ground, so I just hit it as hard as I could," Rikku explained. "I think it throws the disc in the direction the light shines."

"Hnn," Auron muttered, pacing the area. "Have you discovered anything else here?"

Rikku shook her head. "No… this looks like a dead end. I think we gotta go back and try again." She noticed Auron wince and eyed him uncertainly. "Of course, if you're not up to it…"

Auron spun around. "You're remarkably unconcerned by what you've seen here so far," he observed.

"Well… we Al Bhed see lots of strange things all the time!" Rikku covered with a nervous smile. She knew he didn't believe her, but after a moment he dropped the glare for an exasperated grunt and began to pull at the loose strands of hair that had fallen around his face. "Oh, don't do that!" she protested, and then mentally kicked herself.

"Don't do what?" Auron asked, still tucking the errant wisps of hair away. His eyes widened in surprise and he nearly flinched when Rikku stepped to his side and reached towards his face. "What do you think you're…" His indignant words trailed off when she batted his fingers away and smoothed the loose hair back down.

Rikku fussed with the strands for longer than necessary, feeling her own face growing warm. Auron stood stock still, his eyes dark and hard; she wasn't certain if he was angry or not for touching him without invitation, even if it was just his hair. Still, he hadn't drawn his sword, so she took it as an encouraging sign. "You look better this way," she murmured, finally releasing him and stepping away. "More… human."

He continued to stare at her, and she felt the tell-tale blush spreading over her cheeks and upgrading from red to nearly-purple. "Sorry," Rikku managed squeak out in mortification, whirling away from him. She purposefully ignored him and pushed the pillar back onto the walkway to form another travelling disc. "You know, you can wait here if you want. I'm sure I'd be able to find you again, no problem!"

"No."

Rikku jumped when she realized Auron was already standing by her side. She wondered if learning how to sneak around was mandatory for Yevon's Warrior-Monks; it seemed distinctly unfair to her that someone as large as Auron could still make less noise than she moving from place to place. Then again, he didn't wear glass beads in his hair.

"I will accompany you," he said, grasping her by the elbow as they stepped onto the disc together. It shot forward, and the warmth of his hand dropped away. Rikku swallowed and forced herself not to rub her skin where he had touched her; a small movement at the corner of her eye made her glance upwards at Auron's head.

He still looked uncomfortable, though his gaze was now fixed on the shifting light of the pathway, studying its patterns and searching carefully for the directional pad that would alter their course. That he had mostly overcome his vertigo wasn't what made her blink, though. It was the two loose strands of hair twisting in the breeze that brought a smile to her lips.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

8: A Matter Of Fayth

Auron stood at the edge of the platform, blocking Rikku's path to the glowing disc. "No. We still haven't finished exploring this level."

"Well we haven't explored down that way yet either!" Rikku protested. She tried to edge around Auron's side; he crossed his arms and widened his stance.

"It leads to a completely different segment of the labyrinth," Auron said stubbornly.

"And that's exactly why we should take it!" Rikku tried to squeeze through on his other side; once again, Auron stepped into her path. "All we've found are dead ends up here anyway!"

"We are not leaving this level until we've finished…" Auron trailed off as Rikku finally found an opening in his defense and threw herself past him. "Rikkma? What are you -" He cut off into a strangled cry as she grabbed the collar of his robe and hauled him onto the disc behind her.

"Hah, I got it, so there!" Rikku said, dancing in place. The disc leapt into motion, and she slowed as it approached a dropoff. "Oh… uh, wow, that's a pretty steep -"

Auron managed to regain his footing just in time to look down. "AUGH!"

.x.x.x.

To say things went smoothly afterwards was optimistic at best. Auron, still smarting from Rikku's hijack of his careful plan to map out the maze, bickered constantly with her. Though he did learn to navigate the system, their ride was anything but smooth thanks to their arguments.

Rikku wanted to blame the sniping for her own loss of orientation; really, though, Bevelle's Cloister hadn't changed at all - it was still dizzying, terrifying and needlessly complex. It was mostly a matter of luck that they managed to avoid a painful spill back into the entrance. Strangely enough, it was Jecht's loud whoop in the distance that helped her piece together where they were during another runaround; the sound faded all too quickly.

"Hold up," Rikku told Auron, studying the flashing lights of the disc they stood on. "I think I figured something out." Waiting until she saw a turn that tickled her memory, she hit the directional pad and hung on as the disc swooped down a new avenue.

Auron observed the path they took; his brow furrowed. "I think you're right. We haven't been here before."

The disc slowed to a stop at a crossing, and Rikku dropped to her knees and looked up. The patterns of light they travelled on crisscrossed over their heads like a spider's web, and Rikku shivered, feeling very much the trapped insect. The silence was oppressive, broken only by the harsh sound of their breaths in the darkness.

"We should go further," Auron said after studying their choices. He pointed towards a path sloping downwards. Rikku nearly fell off the disc in surprise.

"Huh? I thought you said you wanted to explore every single corner of this place before we took on a new level!" She stood up and carefully stepped around the flashing pad, trying not to activate it.

Auron grimaced and closed his eyes, unable to watch her balancing act. He was holding up fairly well for someone who had been barely able to stand only half an hour earlier. Some things never changed, and his effort to fill the role of a level-headed Guardian was one of them. If he'd donned the collar his future self wore, she might not have noticed the thin beads of perspiration that shone on his neck.

"We should establish how many levels there are to explore first, then find our way back to Braska and Jecht. If we don't, we might end up trapped here for hours," he explained.

"Ohh… well, okay," Rikku said, edging closer to Auron. Even if she could deal with the height better than he, her stomach still protested at the thought of another rapid descent on their flimsy elevator. He gave her a look when she grabbed onto his arm and clutched it in a death grip, but she returned it with a determined scowl. "Don't make that mean face at me! This place is scarier than you!"

Auron rolled his eyes and returned his attention to the flashing pad. "Are you ready?"

Rikku bobbed her head, and he lifted a boot and stomped. There was a brief, dizzying moment of anticipation as the disc rotated slowly, and then they were falling faster than ever. Auron dropped to one knee to keep his balance. Rikku, still holding onto his arm, lost her own and pitched forward as the disc rounded a sharp turn.

For one frozen moment, the sensation of freefall caught up with her; it was the opposite of her experience on the Farplane. This time she was blanketed in darkness instead of light, and Auron was watching her fall with two eyes instead of one. Then with a jolt, she wasn't falling, simply dangling off disc, her wrist locked in the painful grip of his hand as he tried to hold her up.

"Rikkma!" he grunted, squinting at the pathway as they moved. "Grab my arm, quickly!"

Rikku twisted upwards, reaching for him, and caught a glimpse of the fast-approaching platform at the end of the dim tunnel. Her eyes widened; if she didn't move - and fast - the disc would dump Auron off, and she'd either fall if he let go or be smashed against the hard stone if he didn't. Neither option seemed particularly survivable, so with renewed effort she reached up and clutched at his red cloak, trying to haul herself back onto their disc.

I'm not fast enough! Rikku realized, and squeezed her eyes shut as they connected with the platform.

Instead of feeling pain, she was airborne; rather than falling, however, it felt like she was thrown through the air. Then she crashed into something. Surprisingly, the stone wasn't as painful as she expected. It wasn't actually all that hard. And it was warm. And it groaned underneath her. Cracking open an eye, she found herself face to face with Auron.

His eyes were shut, and his hand was still locked around her wrist so tightly that she was sure it would have a black and blue handprint on it the next day. Not that she minded, considering that it was the hand that saved her from a painful death. More distracting, however, was his other arm, which was wrapped around her waist.

She tried not to be impressed that Auron had literally thrown her out of danger with one hand; after all, this was the man who spent his days wielding a sword almost as big as she was as though it was a mere toothpick. Then again, Rikku had fallen into the habit of indulging in Barkeep's homemade chocobo-chips in recent years, and she was fairly certain she weighed more than Auron's sword.

Her gaze dropped back to the hand at her waist; this was closer she had ever gotten to Auron before, and it felt strangely intimate despite their obvious discomfort. Granted, he was holding her more like someone might haul a sack of potatoes around than a lover, but it didn't change the fact that his arm was around her waist.

"T-thanks," she mumbled, her face growing warm. Then to her great disappointment, Auron released his hold and pushed her away.

"Hnn," he grunted in reply, sitting up with a wince. "Are you all right?"

Rikku rubbed at her sore wrist, trying to slow the pounding of her heart. "Yeah." She let out a shaky breath, sitting back and avoiding his gaze. "What a rush! That was almost as bad as when Brother pilots the airship!"

"Airship?" Auron glanced at her sharply.

Rikku's flush deepened and she cast about for a distraction. "Oh look! A Bevelle sphere!" She pointed at the glowing orb that was set into a recess above Auron's head.

Auron didn't turn and his eyes narrowed. "I'm not stupid. You have nowhere to run, Rikkma. If that's even your real name."

"I never said you were stupid," Rikku countered, scooting away from Auron. Not that it meant she could go very far; the platform the disc had dumped them onto was relatively small.

"Then why do you continue to lie?" he replied. His stern expression softened as he watched her fidget. "I just saved your life. The least you can do is tell me who you really are."

Would that change things? Rikku wondered. Auron wasn't blind; with everything they'd been through by now, surely he would have recognized her when she washed up on the shore of the Moonflow in front of Tidus years ago. Which left the question of why he didn't say anything when they first met. True, she had only been fifteen years old at the time, but five years couldn't change a person that much, could they? So it shouldn't really matter if she told him her name or not, she reasoned. She looked at Auron, who was still studying her with fierce intensity.

But a name has power.

The silence stretched thin between them, and Auron's patience ran out. He stood up and turned around to inspect the glowing sphere. Rikku didn't miss the disgusted look on his face, though, and clasped her hands together tightly. Even now, even as a stranger and a Yevonite at that, she wanted more than anything to have his respect if nothing else.

"Rikku," she said quietly.

Auron stopped and looked at her. "And the airship? Are they more than just thousand-year-old legends too?"

Rikku bit her lip. "If you don't like it when I lie, then don't ask me that," she replied, rolling to her feet. "I can't tell you."

He studied her for a moment longer before turning back to the sphere with a grunt. "Fair enough. Thank you, Rikku."

Auron didn't seem to be too knowledgeable about Cid's family, and Rikku let out a soft sigh of relief. Still, she wasn't quite optimistic enough to assume that Braska was similarly uninformed. "You won't tell the others, will you?" she asked, approaching his side.

"You've proven trustworthy so far," Auron admitted. "But why hide your name? Are you a wanted criminal among the Al Bhed?" He kept his tone neutral, but once again Rikku sensed that he was asking more on Braska's behalf than hers.

"It's not what you think," Rikku said. "It'd just be better for everybody if they didn't know." She reached to take the sphere.

"No!" Auron caught her outstretched hand and Rikku froze and swallowed.

"Please…" She began to quake with growing fear. It doesn't matter how I feel about Auron… I can't let him ruin my chance to get back! "You can blackmail me, or tell me to get lost after this if you don't want me around anymore. You can even turn me in to the temple guards. Just whatever you do, please, please, please don't tell Braska my real name!"

Something flickered across Auron's face before his stern mask fell back into place, and his grip on her hand tightened. "We don't know what will happen if you remove that sphere," he said gruffly.

"Sphere?" She trailed off in confusion. Then she looked at the recess. "Oh!" Rikku pulled her hand away from the sphere and out of his grasp and tried not to die of mortification. Like, duh! Get your head on straight, Rikku! He's talking about the sphere! "Well, what else are we gonna do with it?" she asked, giving him a cheeky glare which she hoped covered the scope of her embarrassment.

"We need to return to the others and speak with them about this first," Auron replied, turning back to the transformed pillar and pushing it onto the walkway. Rikku took the opportunity to snatch the sphere despite his warning. When he turned around and saw what she had done, a more familiar look of annoyance crossed his face. She happily ignored it in favor of holding the Bevelle sphere above her head.

"Nothing bad happened, see?" she chirped. "Now we can go back to the others. We'll have this puzzle solved in no time, promise!"

"Unbelievable," she heard Auron mutter under his breath, offering her his arm. "Hold on more tightly this time," he instructed when he found her staring in shock. "And you have my word."

Rikku looked up from Auron's outstretched arm and into his face. "What word?"

"I won't inform Lord Braska of your deception. You have your reasons. As long as they don't endanger the Pilgrimage, you may keep them to yourself."

As she took his arm, Rikku was sure the smile spreading over her face was bright enough to light up the entire cavern.

.x.x.x.

No time translated into almost two hours for Braska's small party; with some gentle prodding, Auron managed to unlock the secret of the spheres. They faced a slight hitch in their progress when he came across the destruction sphere.

When it crystallized out of nothingness before their eyes, even Rikku couldn't deny the aura of evil radiating from the small pink globe. She knew the sphere held only a tiny portion of the desperation and hate that drove the awesome power of Anima. The Cloister itself might have been a miracle of machina construction, but the spheres found within were more bound to the summoned magic of the aeons than any machine. It confirmed her suspicion that Seymour already possessed his mother's powers.

Rikku took it from the socket reluctantly; it felt too cold in her hands, though it burned brightly against the darkness. It was filled with the almost tangible hate of the only permanent aeon capable of surpassing even Bahamut. Justifying to Braska the existence of such an evil tool within the temple would be uncomfortable at best.

Rikku was feeling particularly uncharitable; having been on the receiving end of Anima's attacks courtesy of a Maester, she didn't bother with explanations. Instead she wordlessly handed the sphere to Auron and let him deal with it.

Auron took the discovery in stride; the shock of seeing machina in a temple either prepared him for each new revelation, or at least numbed his response to them. The worry line creased between his eyebrows was beginning to look permanently engrained, though. He spent a short moment staring at it in dismay, then grunted. "We need to solve this puzzle before Braska and Jecht rejoin us," he said, gripping the sphere with a look of distaste.

"Well, we've been at this for long enough," Rikku told him. "Try sticking it in that socket over there. None of the Bevelle spheres worked, so this might."

"Such an artifact in a place of holiness," Auron muttered to himself, but he did as she asked. Thankfully, the evil sphere shattered as it unlocked the final, hard-won path to the Chamber of the Fayth.

Auron stared at the exit for so long that Rikku grew worried.

"Hey, are you -"

Turning, he stomped past her, returning to the glowing pad. "Let's get the others," he ground out, upset by what he'd seen. "The sooner we leave this Trial, the better."

.x.x.x.

"You've returned!" Braska's relief was tempered by the surprise that Rikku and Auron's arrival was sedate, rather than an unceremonious fall from above.

"Took ya long enough," Jecht grumbled. He was sprawled across the ground on his side, picking his ear with his finger.

"Gross," Rikku said with a wince.

"Braska." Auron nodded at the other man. "I apologize for our delay. We successfully cleared a path to the Chamber of the Fayth."

"Is that so," Braska said, looking pleased. "I was beginning to worry you two had come to blows, but I see I was mistaken. I am glad you were both able to find some common ground during the Trial."

Auron grimaced at Braska's amused tone. "Adversity is an effective motivator."

"Hah! We could hear you guys shoutin' at each other all the way up here," Jecht replied, grunting as he stood up. "I was sure you two were gonna off each other before you got back."

Braska shushed Jecht. "If you've found a way through this puzzle, how are we to best reach our goal?" He eyed the glowing disc. "I do not believe more than two of us can mount that thing safely at the same time."

"You're with me," Auron said immediately to the Summoner, leaving Rikku gaping.

"Wait a minute!" She stared at Jecht in dismay. "I'm not going anywhere with that walking disaster!"

"Aww, clam down. This'll be fun!" Jecht said with a grin, throwing an arm around Rikku and trapping her. "Like a joyride, right?"

Rikku whimpered. Auron was already guiding Braska onto the disc, his face especially stoic in the face of her accusatory glare. "Join us as soon as you have the chance," he instructed. "And resist any urge you may have to lose Jecht."

" 'ey! I heard that!" Jecht scowled and released Rikku, frowning as the disc carried the two men away. Then he turned back with a shrug. "Whatever. Bet it's gonna take 'em a while to get through this."

"Probably," Rikku agreed. "Our ride isn't coming back until they're done using it. So what'cha wanna do while we're waiting for them?"

Jecht scratched his head. "I dunno. You any good at belchin' contests?"

Rikku sank to the ground and dropped her face into her hands. "Ugh," she groaned.

.x.x.x.

Oh thank machina, Rikku thought as she and Jecht rode their disc up towards the highest - and last - level of the Cloister of Trials.

"That was even better than surfin'!" Jecht exclaimed as he stepped off. "Are all them Trials this much fun?"

Feeling wobblier than her companion, Rikku landed on her knees and kissed the solid, non-moving stone beneath her. "Thank Ixion they aren't." Pushing herself up, she carefully extracted the Bevelle sphere she had managed to grab on the way out of the maze from her pouch.

"You need to learn to live a little," Jecht complained. "Admit it, it was a fun ride!"

"Maybe for you," Rikku groaned, lurching towards the wall. "You didn't spend two hours with Grumpy trying to solve this thing! If I never see another electric path again, it'll be too soon."

Jecht only laughed at her. "Like you minded all that alone time with the Stiff! I bet you couldn't keep your hands off each other."

Rikku turned around and stuck her tongue out at Jecht. "You're such a pervert! Did it ever occur to you that a guy and a girl could be friends without needing to jump all over each other?"

"Lemmie think about it…" Jecht said, stroking his chin as his eyes narrowed. Then he grinned at Rikku. "Nope! 'Sides, a guy like Auron couldn't make normal friends if his life depended on it. So are you two an item already or what?"

Rikku nearly screamed in frustration as she slammed the sphere into the recess hidden in the wall. "Auron doesn't even like me that way, you… you… big tattooed freak!" Not that I would mind if he did…

"… clueless…" she heard Jecht muttering under his breath. He watched with interest as the swirling patterns on the floor filled with light from the sphere and a glowing path formed in mid-air. "Neat trick," he commented, looking back to the source of the glow. "You sure this is safe?" He tested the newly formed path with his foot.

Rikku smirked and sprinted past him, twirling around on the suspended bridge in delight. "Pretty sure!" she laughed.

"Rikkma! What are you doing?" Braska's shocked voice brought her out of her dance and she windmilled before regaining her balance. "Where did that come from?" he asked, prodding at the path with his staff.

Auron was behind him, not bothering to eye the path, choosing instead to bestow that honor on Rikku herself. "I thought I told you not to waste any more time in the labyrinth."

"Well you were wrong and I was right, so there!" Rikku pouted, planting her hands on her hips. "Trust me, I have a nose for treasure!" She turned and skipped down the pathway.

Auron began to protest, but Braska held up a hand and stopped him. "She is correct. We are low on funds right now, and a little treasure hunting certainly wouldn't hurt." He followed Rikku down the precarious walk, Auron and Jecht close behind him.

Waiting until they joined her, Rikku knelt in front of the treasure chest in the center of the large platform. She squeaked in triumph as she opened it. Then she let out louder, though short-lived scream.

"What's up?" Jecht asked, peering over her shoulder. Frowning, he reached down and grabbed the treasure, pulling it out. "It's just an ugly lookin' sword. Seems like somethin' Auron would get excited about," he mussed, hefting it into the air and turning it around in the dim light.

"No," Rikku said, her eyes wide as she watched Jecht ram the sword's tip into the ground with a loud thunk. "I think it's more suited for you."

The sword in question was oddly beautiful, even if a bit unwieldy; the blackened blade was ornamented with a few swirling patterns, chains dangling off the hilt; it was even larger than Auron's own heavy sword. Jecht managed to lift it with ease, though he lacked Auron's finesse when handling the massive blade.

What struck Rikku speechless was the fact that she knew it was meant to be Jecht's sword. It was a smaller version of the sword he had wielded during their final battle against him; the oddly pointed tip and decorative patterns were all too familiar. There was something else about it that was also unmistakable; though the true nature of the blade was still locked away inside of its depths, Rikku could feel the power thrumming through the metal from the moment she opened the chest. It was a Celestial Weapon, she was sure of it.

"What luck!" Braska said with a note of relief. "A magic blade, even. Truly, this is a fortunate find. And it looks like I have managed to win this argument after all," he added with a hint of smugness as Jecht scowled at him.

"I ain't usin' no sword," Jecht protested, trying to hand the blade off to Auron.

"That looks more like a bat than a sword to me," Auron countered, refusing to take it. "Keep it, Jecht." The beginnings of a smirk twisted at his lips. "A sword as clumsy as that one deserves to be wielded by a fitting patron."

Jecht scowled, lifting the sword and slashing through the air a few times. "Laugh it up, asshole," he muttered sourly. Then he paused and gave Auron a cocky grin. "But hey. Mine's bigger than yours!"

Rikku dropped her head and groaned. "Oh boy, here we go."

Braska chuckled under his breath and helped her to her feet as the two men faced off.

"Size isn't important," Auron replied, drawing his own sword and spinning it around. "You have to know how to wield it properly first."

"You callin' me stupid?" Jecht huffed. Auron's telling silence was enough of an answer.

"Anytime, pal," Jecht grunted, leaning on his sword. "You and me. I'll show you how good this sword is first-hand."

"Is that a challenge?" Auron replied in a bored tone.

"Rikkma, are you feeling well? You look quite flushed."

Braska's worried question broke her attention away from Auron and Jecht's posturing, and Rikku coughed. "Sorry! Just choking on that smell in the air," she explained. Sniffing dramatically, she wrinkled her nose and made an exaggerated wave in front of her face. "Phew, stinks like a couple of bloated male egos. Do you think they're going to pull out a ruler and start measuring the length of their blades next?"

Braska laughed, and Rikku pitched her voice to carry across the room. "If you boys are going to go at it with your great big swords, I definitely want a front row seat!" She gave Auron and Jecht a flirtatious wink; the former put his sword away immediately, while the latter stared at her.

"Who're you callin' a pervert now, girl?" Jecht said after a moment, slinging the large sword over his shoulder in a clumsy imitation of Auron.

"What can I say? It's just too easy sometimes." Rikku smirked. "Besides, I think you're rubbing off on me."

"Yevon help us all," Auron muttered under his breath as he stomped back towards the Chamber of the Fayth.

"Jecht. Rikkma. It's time to go," Braska interrupted, his humor falling away.

Rikku swallowed and nodded, trailing behind the men. Her spirits sank with each step closer to the shrine; soon, they would reach Bahamut's chamber, and her short-lived adventure with Braska and his Guardians would be coming to an end. A tiny smile flickered across her face; the door Bahamut opened had spilled her into an adventure that was nothing like she had expected. She found herself falling into the old routines of a Pilgrimage more easily than she liked to admit. It was in large part thanks to the three men she was accompanying.

Braska, kind and gentle, inspired friendship and loyalty in almost everyone he met. Jecht's rough-and-tumble exterior hid a good heart, even if it wasn't apparent at first glance. And Auron? He might have been lacking the wisdom that age and death brought with it, but in many ways he was still the same driven, dedicated man that she remembered so fondly. And she was finally starting to earn his trust; though Auron had given it freely when they first met on Yuna's Pilgrimage, it was more precious to her now that she had to fight tooth and nail for every grudging centimeter he granted her.

It was unexpectedly difficult to wish each of the men a silent goodbye; they barely knew each other, but she still felt a pang of regret about leaving her newfound friends so soon after meeting them.

The Hymn of the Fayth swelled to an almost painful volume as Rikku scaled the steps, and a shiver passed down her spine. It was easy to forget about Sin when surrounded by laughs and cheer; the haunting melody brought it back all too clearly.

"I don't belong here," she whispered under her breath. Clenching her fists, she sprinted the rest of the way up the steps.

Braska had already passed through the antechamber, and was bowing respectfully before the heavy stone door which concealed the altar. His face was drawn in concentration. Only two things could lift the stone seals which protected the statues of the Fayth: the prayers of a petitioning Summoner or brute force. Braska straightened, and the door to the Chamber parted.

Now! It was Rikku's chance to get inside; she was faster than Auron and Braska, and Jecht wouldn't know any better to stop her. The muscles in her legs tensed.

The Hymn of the Fayth drowned out all other sounds in the room, though the others didn't seem to notice it. Braska moved towards the open door. Jecht slumped to the floor, his mouth forming words as he asked something. Auron crossed his arms, leaning against the wall, and answered him. It was as if everything was happening in slow motion.

Move. MOVE! Rikku strained to push herself forward, but her body was frozen. The air was heavy with a stifling presence that reverberated through the room; the essence of Bahamut, almost tangible and so oppressive that she couldn't bring herself to move, even breathe. Why couldn't anyone else feel it?

Her eyes strayed back towards Braska and widened; he could feel it, she realized with a shock. Braska swayed slightly, the only sign that gave him away, before stepping forward into the dark passage. The door began to close behind him, and Rikku struggled and pushed with every bit of energy she had. She managed to take a shaking step forward as a moan of dismay erupted from her throat.

Auron was looking at her now, his brows drawn together in concern, and Jecht was clambering to his feet. Rikku ignored them, staring at the closing door. No! she wanted to scream. You can't leave me here! I DON'T BELONG HERE!

The door shut, and the heaviness evaporated as suddenly as it had come, sending Rikku onto her hands and knees. She wheezed, sucking air into her lungs, and blinked away the sting of her tears. The first few formed in part because of the physical pain generated by her struggle against Bahamut's power. More leaked out as she realized that returning to her own time wasn't going to be as simple as demanding an audience with the Fayth.

There were hands on her arms, Rikku noticed; they lifted her to her feet and dragged her to the stairs, where she was turned and seated. She blinked, looking up. Jecht was staring at her; his lips were moving. Gradually she realized he was talking to her. Shaking her head to clear it, she concentrated on him and sounds trickled back in.

"… the hell is wrong with you?" he was asking, waving a hand in front of her face.

"This has happened once before." Auron's voice now, low and concerned; Rikku turned her head and saw that he was standing by her side with a frown on his face. "There was a similar episode in the palace, when we first met."

"Eh?" Jecht said, leaning back on his heels. "You think she's sick?"

Rikku dropped her head onto her knees and groaned. "I'm not sick," she mumbled dejectedly.

"I thought you said these attacks weren't normal," Auron told her, his tone accusing.

Rikku didn't bother to lift her head. "They're not. I never got them before. I don't know why it's happening, honest."

I have a good idea, though. It was Bahamut. She was certain of that. The Fayth didn't want to see her, let alone help her return. She shuddered again, coldness washing over her as the knowledge sunk in. For the first time the possibility dawned that maybe, just maybe, there wasn't going to be a chance to return to her Spira. "I'm stuck," she whispered with a small, panicked giggle. "I'm really stuck here."

"You say somethin'?" Jecht asked her.

Rikku shook her head on her knees, still afraid to look up. "Leave me alone, Jecht," she mumbled. He snorted and moved away, but she heard a soft rustle of cloth; Auron leaned in.

"Rikku, are you all right?" he asked her.

Rikku let out a miserable sniff. She wanted to stand up and beat on the stone door of the Chamber; she wanted to scream that nothing was all right at the top of her lungs, not the least of which was his presence. Auron was right next to her asking how she felt when by all rights he should be dead.

"I'm fine," she replied out loud, tightening her grip around her knees. "Just fine."

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

9: Personal Revelations

Jecht was not a morning person. This became apparent when he shuffled into Braska's kitchen, bleary-eyed and sloppy. His clumsy search of the countertop knocked over more than a few bottles before Rikku decided to try to stop the rampage.

"The tea's right here," she said helpfully, holding up her own mug.

"Screw the tea," Jecht grunted. "You got any booze?"

Braska carefully placed his own cup down and pinned Jecht under a disapproving glare. "I don't drink," he said. "And I would appreciate it if you refrained from doing so while in my house."

Jecht swayed and then grumbled in acquiescence, reaching instead for an empty cup and helping himself to some tea. "Don't see the problem," he grunted. "You let Auron carry that jug around with him wherever he goes."

"That," Braska replied, "is different. All high-ranking Warrior Monks learn how to use blessed wine as a part of their combat training."

Jecht blinked and took a long gulp from his mug. He belched noisily.

Rikku winced. "Eww, morning breath! Keep it to yourself!"

Jecht wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and grinned. "So where do I sign up to become one of these monks?"

Braska sighed and returned to his own small breakfast of sliced fruit. "I want to spend some time with Yuna," he told them. "Please understand. We will be leaving the city early tomorrow, so you are free until then. But for today I would like to have some time alone with my daughter."

"Sure, whatever," Jecht grunted. Then he scrunched his brows and looked around the table. "Where's Auron anyway?" he asked, directing the question at Rikku.

"How should I know?" Rikku stared at Jecht with narrowed eyes as a smirk began to form. "Don't answer that, it's too early to deal with your perverted jokes right now."

"Auron should be outside, training." Braska collected his empty plate and stood up, depositing the dish in the washbasin. "I shall wake Yuna. The city is yours for the day." A small smile crossed his face. "Do try to stay out of trouble," he added.

"Who, us? Trouble?" Rikku said innocently. She ignored Braska's amused chuckle and returned her attention back to her own breakfast, which was more of an exercise in food sculpture than an attempt to eat. Rikku hadn't had much of an appetite since their return yesterday.

"You gonna finish that?"

Rikku shrugged and pushed her plate over to Jecht. The soothing sound of Braska's voice floated into the room as he spoke to Yuna; Rikku blinked sleepily. She planted her chin into a palm and thought about their trip back from the temple.

Braska was successful in obtaining his first aeon, though like his daughter, it had taken the man an extraordinarily long time to do so. He had emerged from the altar looking pale and exhausted, and the small group hadn't managed to do much more than return to his apartment for the night to allow him to recover from the ordeal. Rikku wasn't in any mood to argue with the decision; she was feeling fairly drained herself, though sleep didn't find her as easily as she'd hoped.

Instead, Rikku spent the night twisting possibilities and weighing scenarios in her mind, trying to conjure up a way out of her waking nightmare. Not that she had anything against the current company; rather, the omnipresent threat of Sin, the more nebulous danger of Shuyin and Vegnagun, and even the as-of-yet still teenaged Seymour worried continually at the edges of her mind. In the end, she only managed to reach two concrete conclusions: if Bahamut wanted to be kind, he should have taken her memories when he threw her back, and that her next best hope to return would be to find a way into this world's Farplane. If anything, she could always fling herself off into the mists once more and hope for a repeat performance. Or a messy death. But hey, at least it would be in the Farplane, rather than one of the temples. Or worse yet, in the aftermath of one of Sin's random attacks.

The only monkey wrench in Rikku's plan was the location of the Farplane. Outsiders were hardly welcome in Guadosalam. It was true that missionaries of the Church had been quite busy proselytizing to the Guado for years; Lord Jyscal's conversion was considered one of Yevon's greatest successes. Still, the sheer lack of Guado even on the streets of Bevelle clued Rikku in to the potential difficulty of being granted an audience within the xenophobic city. Being a part of Braska's summoning party would certainly help; it was enough of an answer to allow her to fall into an uneasy sleep. It didn't keep away the nightmares, though, and Rikku woke early, before either Yuna or Jecht.

Not before Braska, however, whom she found sitting alone at the table, plagued by his own demons. And of course not before Auron, who along with his sword was already missing from the tiny apartment. She and Braska hadn't exchanged any words then, just a meeting of eyes and a morbid silence. Unable to take it, Rikku had finally gotten up and puttered around the kitchen, pulling out mugs and jars until she found Braska's stash of tea and applied herself to preparing a pot.

"You're really going to do this," she stated when she was finished, setting a mug in front of him.

He took it from her gratefully and bowed his head. "Perhaps it is not fair to Yuna," he admitted. "But it is all I have left to give her."

"No it's not!" Rikku blurted out then. "You're just taking the easy way out, you know that? Yunie doesn't need a Calm, she needs a dad!"

Braska had looked at her, laughing without humor, and nodded. "You are partially right. I am a selfish man." And then, his eyes filling with pain, he had reached out and clasped her hand. "More than anything else, I wish to see my wife again. If it was not for Yuna…" he trailed off.

Rikku heard it then, in his voice; he wanted to die, and it had nothing to do with Sin or the Pilgrimage at all. His fingers tightened around hers and he was looking at her, but not seeing her. "Raenn," he murmured. "Would that you were real. I would give anything to see you again."

Rikku felt a shiver pass through her. Weren't those her thoughts reflected in his face? Her own desires, the unvoiced ones that had formed Auron's image on the Farplane? Scared by the intensity of his words, she extracted her palm from his grip and stared at the floor. The movement woke Braska, and he caught her eyes.

"I am not selfish enough to take that journey without giving something back as well. You are wrong. Yuna does need a Calm. Every man, woman and child in Spira needs the Calm. I will not have my daughter raised in fear as well as exile."

"Even if it means she has to be alone?"

Braska closed his eyes. "If I manage to bring the Calm, she will never be alone."

"That's not what I meant!" Rikku snapped. "She won't have you."

"She will have to manage." The tense silence that had risen in the wake of Braska's uncompromising reply remained in place until Jecht's bumbling interruption.

Bringing herself out of her reflection, Rikku watched the other man eat, oblivious to her troubled silence. Irritated, Rikku stood. In no mood to deal with Jecht's ignorance, she left him at the table and wandered towards the exit.

"Say hi to Auron when you see him," Jecht hooted after her.

"Who said I'm looking for him?" Rikku called over her shoulder, scowling and resisting the urge to slam the door behind her. She stomped down the narrow staircase and skipped out into the empty street, glancing over her surroundings. Auron was nowhere in sight, and Rikku huffed and paced restlessly across the sidewalk in front of the building.

"I'm so not looking for him," she repeated to herself even as her feet carried her back up the stairwell. She passed Braska's door and continued upward, climbing steadily until she reached the door to the roof. Easing it open, she peered out.

Auron was practicing, just as Braska said. He must have been there for some time already; the red coat was neatly folded next to the door, and his ever-present jug was lying on top of it. Shutting the door, Rikku seated herself next to his things and admired the show.

He hadn't yet noticed her, continuing to sling his sword through the air in the clean, focused strikes of a kata. Auron's mastery of the blade was a thing of beauty; he moved fluidly through each twist and slash as though the motions were effortless. She admired the finely muscled curve of his arms, which were covered with a thin layer of sweat that glistened in the morning light. They were strong and sharply defined, and in her opinion much too often hidden beneath the folds of his thick red coat. She fleetingly thought of hacking the sleeves of said coat off with her daggers while he wasn't looking, even going so far as to pick up the fabric and rub it beneath her fingers.

Auron whirled around, slashing his sword downwards with a grunt. His eyes widened with surprise, but he checked the motion of his swing precisely at the moment he saw her. Rikku was impressed; he managed to hold the blade perfectly still despite its weight and the force of his own strike. Then again, by the time they had finally faced Sin together, Auron was even better with the sword than he was now.

"Enjoying yourself?" Auron asked dryly.

"Oh, don't stop just 'cause of little old me!" Rikku offered, giving him a cheerful wave and tucking his coat back underneath the jug.

"I don't think so," Auron told her, hitching the sword over his back and approaching. He leaned over and grabbed his coat, inspecting it for damage before donning it, and then to her surprise settled beside her on the ground. Rikku sniffed and made a face; even if perspiration looked good on him, it smelled anything but.

"Do you do this every morning?" she asked.

Auron nodded, wiping away some of the sweat from his forehead.

Rikku let out a disappointed sigh. "Then I think I'm really going to miss showers when we start travelling."

The low noise that came out of Auron's throat could have been either a grunt of annoyance or an amused chuckle; it died out as he regarded her. "So you've decided to stay with us beyond Bevelle, then?"

"I think I don't have much of a choice," Rikku admitted. Then she smiled at him. "Besides, you guys are starting to grow on me. I thought maybe I should stick around and keep you from murdering Jecht."

The rumble that came out of Auron's throat next was definitely a laugh. "By providing us with a new target?" he finished for her, uncapping his jug and lifting it to his lips.

"Whoa!" Rikku yelled, her eyes growing large. "I thought Braska said that was holy combat nog or something!"

Auron lowered the jug. "It is," he answered with a straight face.

Rikku scowled at him. "Well isn't it a little too soon for that, huh?"

"I have to find some way to deal with you this early in the morning."

She stopped trying to hide her stare. He looked back at her impassively, and that's when it struck her. "You just made a joke!" she told him, sticking her finger into his face. Not that she wasn't delighted to have witnessed it, but the more immediate concern was that she was the butt of it, and that, in Rikku's mind, was clearly unacceptable.

"So I did," Auron mused. "It must be the wine." This time the amusement in his voice was evident.

Gaping, Rikku crossed her arms. "I should've snitched your sleeves while I had the chance," she huffed. "So much for being nice!"

"Rikku," Auron said, and she quieted down. The amusement in his tone had died out, and he half-turned to look at her. "These… attacks you've been having," he began. "Do you have any idea of what might be causing them?"

"Maybe," Rikku said uncertainly. "But I don't wanna talk about it, okay?"

Auron frowned. "My condition for secrecy is that you do not hinder Braska's Pilgrimage. If these attacks are going to become a liability -"

Rikku groaned. "I'm not going to drag you guys down, okay?" She crossed her arms and glared at Auron. "You're not getting rid of me that easily."

"You are persistent," Auron admitted.

Rikku smiled at him and flipped a braid away from her face. "One of my better qualities, of course!" she bragged. Her smile faltered and dropped when she realized that he wasn't about to give up either.

"What is it that you really want?" he asked. It was an honest question for once; not one stacked with ulterior motives and double meanings. He was asking for her, not Braska. It made her smile, though the question still left her confused. So she voiced her confusion.

"What'cha mean?"

Auron stared out into the open expanse of sky, or at least what could be seen of it from within the crowded confines of Bevelle. Rikku followed his example and squinted at the small strip of blue, which shone brightly over the dark, gloomy buildings surrounding them. It really did feel like Bevelle existed in a different world from the rest of Spira. For a brief moment Rikku found herself wishing Sin would come and attack the city, tearing down its man-made barriers and forcing its residents to rejoin the rest of the world outside. Then the moment passed and was replaced with a deep-rooted shame for having even thought of it.

"What are you searching for?" Auron's deep voice swept away the guilty reflection, demanding her attention. "You obviously don't believe in the teachings of Yevon, but you are still here, and a Guardian no less."

Rikku slumped. "Once upon a time," she said, "someone told me that the Fayth are the ones who give power to the Summoners. Not the temples and not the Teachings." She couldn't stop the nostalgic smile that bloomed. "Just because I don't like Yevon doesn't mean I can't be a good Guardian."

Auron considered her reply before speaking once more. "That doesn't answer the question."

Rikku leaned back onto her elbows and stretched out her legs. She closed her eyes and concentrated on the feel of the air and the warmth of the morning sun. If she pretended, she could almost imagine that she wasn't surrounded by the dingy, dirty slums of Bevelle. She could be lying on the deck of the Celsius, lazing around while waiting for Buddy to report on the next round of sphere waves and complaining to herself about how busy she was doing nothing important.

"I want a world without Sin," she replied without hesitation. "…I want to go home."

Auron, of course, didn't understand. "Then why don't you?"

"I would if I could but I can't, okay?" Rikku snapped bitterly, breaking the peaceful atmosphere between them.

He recoiled, then answered her just as harshly. "So you chose a Guardian's path simply because you have nothing better to do with yourself."

Rikku winced. "That's not what I meant! I really do want to see a world without Sin," she told him, her anger deflating with every word. "I know it's possible."

"Lord Braska will bring the Calm, whether you are with us or not." Auron's glare was cold, and she could almost see all the progress she'd made befriending him in the past two days crumbling away. She tried to take comfort from the fact that he was still talking to her, but his tone had turned businesslike, and it made her heart sink. "If you can't even decide on your own goals, then you will fail in your duty as a Guardian. You'll have to make up your mind."

Rikku froze, chilled by his words. You'll have to choose what you love more in the end. Is that what you meant? she thought, feeling her insides twist. The whispered question made sense now; she cursed herself for having clung to her memory of Auron so tightly that it had blinded her to his sacrifice. Braska and Yuna's sacrifice. Jecht and Tidus' sacrifice. She had wished for the world to revolve around her, and her wish had been granted. And now here she was, with the power to change everything. She could destroy Spira - all for a foolish, selfish crush on a man long dead.

If she had been grateful, she would have been congratulating Yuna and Tidus on their new life together, rather than watching them jealously from the sidelines; flirting with Gippal rather than spurning his advances in favor of moping on the Farplane. She should have spent her time living with what was rather than wishing for what could have been. Now Auron was here, whole and young and alive, and more receptive to her advances than he had ever been before - though that still wasn't saying much. The only price she had to pay for her dream was Spira's happiness.

He knew I could never choose that.

The irony of her "victory" made her laugh out loud. Auron was looking at her strangely, and Rikku smiled at him. "Hey Auron," she said. "Did you know that being in love feels like walking on pins and needles?"

"Love?" His eyebrows drew together and he looked away, caught off guard. "I wouldn't know," he answered.

Rikku let herself sprawl all the way down onto the ground, staring up into the sky. "Yeah, you do," she corrected him. "You love Braska."

"Are you implying that I -" he began indignantly, but Rikku cut him off.

"You're not Jecht. Stop thinking those weird perverted thoughts!" she snapped.

Auron opened his mouth to protest, and then closed it. A shadow crossed his face, followed by a wry smile. "… yes," he said after a moment of silent consideration. "Yes, it does feel that way, doesn't it."

He turned to face her, but Rikku avoided his gaze. After her revelation, she couldn't bear to look into his eyes. It was immeasurably worse than wishing for Sin to destroy Bevelle.

"You're a strange riddle," Auron told her. "You want to help us, but you abhor the Summoner's path. You wish for the Calm, but you disapprove of the Pilgrimage. You want to return to your home, but you remain with us."

"I guess I'm just a gal who wants it all," Rikku answered.

She heard Auron standing up; from her position on the ground, seeing his face was unavoidable. He was looking at her with a mix of pity and confusion. "I don't know your secrets, but I can tell you this much. You cannot be of two minds, Rikku."

Rikku turned her head and stared at him; it was painful, considering how bright the backdrop of the sky was against his darkly shaded face. Separate worlds, she thought.

"Choose one path, and follow it with all your heart. It will make things…"

"Easier?" Rikku supplied.

"… simpler," he answered. He turned to leave, and Rikku tilted her head back to watch him.

"Hey, where are you going?" she asked.

He faced her again and the hint of a smile tugged at his lips. "Apparently I need a shower." Pulling open the door, he stepped into the building. Rikku watched until until the closing door obscured him.

"You aren't making it any easier, stupid-head."

.x.x.x.

After Auron left, Rikku fell asleep on the rooftop. When she eventually woke and returned to Braska's apartment, not much had changed. Auron was sitting on the couch, idly flipping through a book, while Jecht was lounging in the kitchen. She took one look around the room and decided she needed a distraction; the party was definitely not happening here.

"I'm bored!" Rikku rolled on the balls of her feet, swaying back and forth in front of Auron while pouting.

Auron looked up from the book he was reading and glared at her. "Go bother someone else."

"Meanie." Rikku stuck out her tongue and flounced away from the couch, making her way to the kitchen table. Jecht sprawled over a chair there, looking just as bored as she felt. "I'm bored!" she repeated to him.

Jecht didn't bother to move, only rolling his eyes in her direction. "So am I!" he complained.

"Well, what should we do?" she asked, arms akimbo. "Braska still isn't back yet, and it's way long before it'll get dark outside!"

Jecht roused himself out of his lazy slump. "Well… how 'bout we explore the city?"

"No," Auron called out from the couch, not bothering to look up.

"Hey!" Rikku and Jecht yelled simultaneously.

"No," Auron repeated with authority. "You both stick out like a sore thumb. The last thing we need is to have either of you getting arrested again. Besides, you have no money," he added, looking pointedly at Rikku. "Stay indoors and keep your heads low. We leave Bevelle tomorrow."

"Aw, man!" Jecht groaned, melting back into his seat. "Wish you hadn't busted up the damn blitzball."

"Hmph," Auron grunted with a note of malicious satisfaction.

Rikku was unwilling to accept defeat as easily as Jecht did. Her eyes roved around the tiny apartment until they settled on the two massive swords propped against the corner of the sitting room. "Hey Jecht." She kicked at the sole of his foot to get his attention, and he twitched in annoyance.

"Whadda ya want, Blondie?"

"Lemmie see your sword again!" Rikku told him, pointing at it.

Jecht lolled his head back. "You can see fine it from here."

Rikku sighed and rolled her eyes. "Yeah, but I can't lift it!" Jecht snorted and made no attempt to move, and Rikku stomped her foot on the ground. "Jecht!"

"Alright, alright!" he groaned, slouching out of his seat and towards his sword. He grabbed it and hefted it into the air. "Happy now?"

Rikku studied the blade. The black metal thrummed with power underneath her fingertips; it was so saturated with magic energy that it almost tingled. Despite that, there was no obvious benefit, magical or otherwise, to using the sword as anything other than just another sharp edge. Neither she nor Braska had managed to figure out how to unlock the secrets hidden within the blade. "You can feel it, can't you?" she asked, stroking the red runes. "This sword is special."

"It don't feel all that special to me," Jecht said, pulling it away from her.

Rikku pursed her lips together in exasperation. "That's because you don't know how to use it yet, dork!" she replied. "You're not much of a caster, are you."

"I know a little white magic!" Jecht protested, and Rikku gawked at him. Auron also set his book aside and looked up in surprise.

"You know magic," he repeated, his expression clearly indicating his disbelief.

Jecht grumbled and rubbed the back of his head. "Yeah. Well all I really know is a little Haste spell and how to do some Scannin'. S'good for blitzin' … and scopin' out the ladies."

Auron relaxed into his chair with a look of disgust. "I should have guessed," he mumbled, once again disinterested in their conversation.

"Perv," Rikku said under her breath. "And don't you dare try that on me! I have eyes in the back of my head!"

"No, you don't," Jecht countered. "I checked already." He laughed loudly as Rikku spent a few moments fuming at him.

"Well if you know magic, how can you not feel it?" Rikku asked, smacking the blade into the floor. The tip landed in the threadbare carpet, giving it a new tear.

"Don't do that," Auron droned from the couch, flipping to a new page. "Go outside if you're going to manhandle that thing."

Jecht rolled his eyes and Rikku glared at Auron, who ignored both of them. Then she shifted her attention back to the sword. "You really can't feel it? I mean this thing is practically oozing magic!"

"I can feel it just fine," Jecht replied. "It don't do nothin' special though, besides feel weird when I touch it." He grimaced and tried to stow his sword back into the corner, but Rikku stopped him.

"Don't you want to learn how to use it at least?" she asked.

"Nope," Jecht replied, pulling the sword out of her grasp.

Rikku pouted. "I thought you said you were bored!"

"I ain't that bored!" Jecht growled. "Get back to buggin' Auron already!"

"Fine, I will!" Rikku huffed, stomping over to the couch and stopping in front of Auron. He remained engrossed in his book, but she saw him tense at her approach. "Oh Auron," she called sweetly, swaying back and forth.

"No."

Rikku wilted, then scowled at him. "Sheesh, you have a limited vocabulary, don't you?" Auron glowered but refused to put away his book. "C'mon!" Rikku whined insistently. "You know he needs it!"

"The hell?" Jecht interrupted, crossing his arms. "I don't need his help!"

"Stop being so stubborn, both of you!" Rikku jumped in frustration. "Don't you wanna protect Braska?" That seemed to have struck a nerve, at least with Auron. With a long-suffering sigh, he snapped the book shut and placed it aside.

"Fine." He stood up and brushed past Rikku and Jecht, grabbing his sword. "I'll be on the rooftop."

"Don't wait up," Jecht called after Auron as he pulled the front door open.

Auron stopped and turned to Rikku, his gaze hard. "Whether or not he decides to come is no concern of mine." Then he slipped out the door, slamming it behind himself.

Mission Train Jecht: Part One, accomplished! Rikku cheered to herself. Then she put on a stern expression and faced the second half of the problem. "Jecht!"

"Uh-uh," Jecht said, backing away from her. "I ain't goin'!"

Rikku smiled at him. "You know you're just proving that Auron really is better than you by acting like such a scaredy-cat!"

Jecht pouted stubbornly. "I ain't fallin' for that."

"Falling for what? The truth?" Rikku threw her hands up. "Once we hit the road, the first fiend we meet is gonna tear you apart unless you figure out how to use that sword."

"I'd rather get a few knocks from a fiend than feed the Stiff's ego." He refused to budge.

"His name is Auron and he's not a stiff!" Rikku glared at Jecht and tried a new tactic. "In case you didn't notice, he's trying to help you out here. Now take this sword…" She grabbed onto the handle of Jecht's sword as she spoke and tried to lift it. Not surprisingly, it wasn't happening. Paine had always told her she had the upper body strength of a hypello, and she wasn't far off the mark. "Uhh!" Rikku grunted, only managing to move the sword a few inches before resting it on the floor, where it made yet another new tear in the carpet. "This thing is heavy!"

"You look ridiculous." Jecht laughed at her. Rikku was going to scowl at him, but then she realized that a laughing Jecht was more likely to reach the rooftop than a sulking one.

"I wouldn't have to do this if you'd just take this stupid sword…" She grunted, dragging the sword forward again and splitting the hapless carpet apart as she did so. Auron's so gonna kill me. Then Jecht laughed again, and she twitched. No, he's so gonna kill Jecht when I tell him that this was all his fault. "… and learn how to use it!" she finished, stopping in front of him.

Jecht sighed and grabbed the sword out of her hand. "Gimme that before you wreck the rest of Braska's pad," he told her.

"So you'll go then?" Rikku asked him hopefully, clasping her hands together under her chin.

"Ugh, yeah, alright. But you're gonna owe me for this one, Rikkma," Jecht strode towards the door, and Rikku skipped behind him with a happy smile.

"Huh, you're comin' too?" Jecht asked, pausing at the door.

Rikku smirked at him and shoved him up the stairs. "Hah, I wouldn't miss this for the world!"

Jecht cursed under his breath. He climbed the stairs and burst out onto the rooftop.

Rikku spilled out behind him and plopped herself onto the ground with a large smile. "Hey hey, let's get this party started!" she called.

Auron turned to face them; he was already waiting. His coat was neatly folded and placed to the side, and he leaned on his sword. "You actually came," he said to Jecht.

"Thanks to your harpy," Jecht grumbled.

Rikku stopped cheering and sent a Rikku Look hurtling towards Jecht. "What was that?" she yelled at him.

"She's not my harpy," Auron answered.

"Auron!" Rikku screeched, and he glanced at her in surprise.

"Why are you upset with me?" he asked with a note of annoyance.

"Duh!" Rikku shook her fist at him. "You're supposed to say 'She's not A harpy!'"

His smug look returned. "… Why?"

The smile on Jecht's face broadened. "Hah! Maybe you're right, Rikkma, he ain't that much of a Stiff after all!"

That dropped the smirk off of Auron's face, though it didn't change Rikku's expression at all.

"You both suck," she declared. "Go hit each other with your swords or something!"

Jecht continued to laugh at her until Auron interrupted him with a quiet command.

"Now then," he said. "Come at me."

Jecht scratched the back of his head. "Huh?"

Auron grimaced and lifted his sword, sliding into a guard position. "Attack me!" he repeated.

At this Jecht finally picked up his own sword and smiled. "Don't need to ask me twice!" He ran towards Auron, swinging the sword at the other man like a large club.

Rikku thought she saw Auron roll his eyes as he gracefully avoided Jecht's blow. She smiled; it was a technique Auron had already mastered, one she had learned herself from Lulu while travelling together. Jecht was fast, almost as fast as she was, and strong to boot. But Auron knew the strengths and limits of his own body, and trained rigorously to hone the skills he had. You didn't have to be fast when defending, you had to be agile. Auron hadn't actually moved from his original spot when Jecht struck, he simply dodged the clumsy strike.

Jecht spun quickly, cleaving downwards with the sword in an attempt to catch Auron off guard. Auron, however, was already prepared and blocked the strike, and with a screech of metal whirled the sword around and sent it flying out of Jecht's hands. It landed with a heavy thunk a few paces in front of Rikku's seat.

"Wow," she yelped, wide-eyed. "That was cool!"

"Damn," Jecht cursed, rubbing his wrist. "That was just luck!"

"It was anything but," Auron countered smoothly. "Get your sword."

"Aw, shaddup," Jecht growled as he stalked over to his weapon. Pulling it from the ground, he whirled and rushed at Auron again without warning.

Rikku winced, Auron sighed, and then with a clang of metal, Jecht's sword was spinning through the air again, this time landing on the opposite side of the roof.

"You need to learn how to wield your sword properly," Auron stated. "It's not a blitzball."

Jecht rubbed his head and stood up slowly from where he'd been knocked to the ground. "Don't matter how I hold the damn thing long as it ends up stuck in your side," he shot back.

"Idiot," Auron huffed, disgusted. "You'll never manage to break through your opponent's defense until you learn how to handle your own weapon."

Jecht's face darkened and he bared his teeth at Auron in an ugly growl. "I don't need this bullshit," he ground out, stalking towards the door.

Auron returned the expression with an annoyed grimace of his own, dropping his sword off of his shoulder and slamming it into the ground in frustration. "Humph. I knew this was a waste of time."

Rikku shot up from her seat and stopped Jecht before he could reach the door, cringing at the tension that was crackling between the two angry men. "Hold up! Wait a second, Jecht!" She grabbed his arm when he pushed past her. He actually did drag her a few paces towards the exit despite her struggle to slow him down before stopping. "Come on, you need to learn this stuff. Auron knows what he's talking about!"

Jecht glared at her, his jaw working tightly. "This ain't what I signed up for," he grunted. "Laugh it up all you want. I ain't gonna sit here and be humiliated by the two of you. Get your kicks some other way."

Rikku released his arm with a silent gasp of surprise. She should have guessed; Jecht was a proud, arrogant man, and Auron was giving that pride a very thorough beating. "Sorry…" she mumbled, ashamed. "We didn't mean it like that."

"Right," Jecht snorted, crossing his arms and glaring at the door.

"Jecht."

The blitzball player spun around to face Auron, who had hefted his own sword back onto his shoulder. "Eh?" he grunted.

"Take up your sword," Auron demanded, inclining his head towards the abandoned blade.

Jecht narrowed his eyes at Auron. "Why the hell should I?"

Auron looked away, tapping his own blade on his shoulder. "Because you show potential," he admitted grudgingly.

The frown on Jecht's face was replaced by a look of surprise. Taking advantage of the moment, Rikku moved behind him and pushed him towards his blade. "Go on, Jecht!" she told him, ushering him to the sword. Finally Jecht shook her off and picked up the weapon on his own.

"Potential, huh?" He flipped the blade in his hands. "Fine. But if I hear either of you laughin' I walk."

Rikku held her hands up and backed away. "I promise not to laugh! I can't even lift your sword!" she told him with a bright smile.

Auron said nothing, only dipping his head in agreement.

"So…" Jecht said, gripping his sword with both hands and pointing it at Auron.

A faint smile crossed Auron's face. "Let's look at your stance first."

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

10: She Knew No Sin

"She feared no danger, for she knew no sin." - John Dryden

Rikku shaded her eyes with her hand and looked back at the receding skyline of the city. "Finally," she breathed, letting a small smile of relief stretch over her face. They were leaving Bevelle at last, and the pent-up tension she'd harbored ebbed away with each step.

"Wow!" Yuna's gasp was accompanied by a pointing finger. "Is that Macalania Forest?" She tugged at one of the long strips of cloth that hung from Braska's helmet.

"Yes, it is." Braska grinned with a knowing look at the hopeful expression that crossed his daughter's face. "And no, you can't come with me there. The forest is full of dangerous fiends, it wouldn't be safe."

"But… !" Yuna said stubbornly.

Braska shook his head and bent over, depositing Yuna back onto the ground. "No," he repeated. "You have to leave with Beatrix now. It's time." He reached out and brushed a stray lock of hair away from her face.

"I don't want to go," Yuna whispered, her eyes bright.

Braska kneeled and cupped her small chin in his hand, his gaze never leaving her face. "Beatrix," he called out.

"My lord," the woman replied, pulling the unresisting girl away from her father.

Yuna shook herself free, but didn't try to retrace her steps. Instead, she squeezed her eyes shut and lifted her chin. "I'm not sad," she stated proudly. "My father's going be the hero of Spira, so I won't cry."

Braska smiled. "That's my girl." Rising to his feet, he turned to Auron. "I'm ready. Look after Jecht, please."

Yuna's face lit up at Braska's words, and Beatrix pulled the little girl even further away. Rikku watched Braska hoist his staff, and with a small "Oh!" of realization, scooted away from him as well. Auron approached Jecht, who was the only person not clearing a wide berth around the Summoner.

"Where's everyone goin'?" Jecht asked, scratching his head. Auron merely turned him around and shoved him towards Rikku. " 'ey, what's the big idea?"

"Father's going to summon!" Yuna told him, her eyes wide with anticipation.

"Summon?" Jecht asked, looking up from the little girl with the obvious question plastered across his face.

Rikku pointed at Braska. "You'll see. Just keep quiet and watch!"

Braska was poised, motionless but for the breeze which tugged at his clothes. Then, taking a deep breath, he began to dance. Rikku inhaled sharply; the Summoner's dance was impressive no matter who performed it. It was something she never thought she'd see again, the staff twirling and dipping as he spun around, robes flying in the unnatural wind that rose around him.

"What the hell…" she heard Jecht gasp as the sky darkened; the clouds roiled, pulled into a whirlwind that echoed Braska's movements. A distant roar sounded, and then the heavens lit with energy and color, spinning runes exploding overhead. He burst through the clouds, a blur of black sinew and golden claws, massive wings outstretched.

Bahamut the Wise, Lord of Lords, ruler supreme of all summons appeared before them, fully vested with all of his terrible, awe-inspiring glory. The dragon swooped from the sky, landing with a crash and sending clods of earth flying. Slowly he straightened and crossed his arms, his glowing eyes peering down at the Summoner as if to judge him.

Braska was frozen, his staff still outstretched. His eyes were distant and unfocused; he'd fallen into a Summoner's Rapture. It was a personal bond created between a Summoner and his aeon; a sharing of minds and senses that allowed Braska to control Bahamut's actions with finesse, at the cost of the control over his own body. It was also the primary reason a Summoner required Guardians for protection. Rikku never thought she would see that again in her lifetime, either.

"Where the hell did that thing come from?" Jecht asked, his eyes still fixed on the huge dragon. Rikku looked away long enough to see the his hands extended, fingers forming a small box through which he was studying the aeon. Then she choked and grabbed his wrists, slapping them out of the form.

"Are you nuts?" she hissed, though not quietly enough. Auron shot them both an annoyed glance and then blanched.

"What's the big deal? I just wanted to see what it was…" Jecht trailed off as the remnants of the Scan spell dissipated into the air.

"He cast at Lord Braska's aeon?" Auron ground out, turning to face the huge dragon and resting a hand on the hilt of his sword. To Rikku's dismay, Bahamut also noticed them, rumbling ominously.

"Jecht! If Bahamut doesn't kill us, I'm going to murder you!" Rikku squeaked, reaching for her own daggers. Quailing, she turned to Beatrix and tried to push her away. "Get Yunie out of here, now!" Not that it would help, she thought, considering the scope Bahamut's Mega-Flare could encompass.

"No," Yuna said, twisting out of Beatrix's tight grasp and standing her ground. "I'm not scared. That's father's dragon, he won't hurt us."

Bahamut lumbered towards them; the ground shuddered under his clawed feet, and everyone except Yuna stepped backward. He dropped to one knee before them and snorted, sending out blast of warm air that blew Yuna's bangs away from her face.

Then, wide-eyed, Rikku watched as the little girl reached for Bahamut's snout. He bent lower and let her tiny hand scrabble over his muzzle, emitting a noise that sounded suspiciously like a purr. Yuna giggled and redoubled her efforts, unphased by the rows of razor-sharp teeth that were centimeters away from her fingers.

"He seems to like you, Yunie!" Rikku said, wondering why she was even surprised.

"This is why we visit the temples," Auron told Jecht, recovering some of his composure. "A Summoner prays to the Fayth so he can call on their power in the form of an aeon."

"So… every Summoner can do this?" Jecht asked, still eyeing Bahamut's imposing figure with trepidation.

"The primary duty of a Summoner is to collect aeons during their Pilgrimage," Auron said, relaxing when the huge dragon stepped away from Yuna. "After Lord Braska has visited each temple, we will journey to Zanarkand for the Final Aeon and use it to defeat Sin."

"You mean they get even bigger?" Jecht gaped at Bahamut, who barely acknowledged their presence. "When I see that thing, I think you guys might actually have a chance." Then he grinned and cupped his hands over his mouth. "Glad you're on our side, buddy!" Bahamut tilted his head and didn't move. Jecht frowned and dropped his arms, looking annoyed. "Hey ugly, can you even hear me?"

Yuna giggled and Auron groaned. "A Summoner controls his aeon, Jecht. Bahamut will only respond if Lord Braska allows it."

"Let's hope he doesn't," Rikku piped in, nudging Jecht not-so-gently in the ribs. "I wouldn't go around calling things with that many sharp pointies on it ugly if I were you!"

"What, you scared?" Jecht laughed at her, and Rikku glowered.

"Yeah, right!" she shot back. Just to prove her point, she leaned forward, facing the dragon. "Maybe you look mean, but you don't scare me at all!" she shouted. "You're just a big soft mushball inside, aren't you?"

To everyone's surprise, Bahamut's head turned and his beady eyes glinted as they focused on Rikku.

"Oh, heh heh, I didn't mean it like that!" she laughed nervously. And then she fell quiet, meeting the aeon's piercing gaze. The sound and color of the surrounding world dulled and time slowed, though Bahamut remained as vivid and imposing as ever. This wasn't about her joke, she realized. "Why?" she asked. "Why did you bring me here?" she repeated, rancor giving her question strength.

Bahamut stared mutely; aeons couldn't speak, and the Fayth only appeared when they chose to. Even so, she could see the answer in his hard, unforgiving gaze. This is what you wanted. Rikku squeezed her eyes shut. When she opened them again, the others were looking at her.

"You gonna have another one of them -" Jecht asked her, and Rikku jumped.

"No!" she yelled, angrier than she realized. Jecht jerked away from her in surprise. She took a deep breath and glared at Bahamut, suddenly infuriated by his presence. The dragon stood before them, impassive, but she knew better than to think he didn't notice her. No, he was purposefully ignoring her, and that was completely different. "That thing doesn't scare me at all," she ground out, clenching her teeth. "He can stand there and look as mean as he wants for all I care. It's not like he has enough power to defeat Sin anyway!"

"Rikkma!" Auron said sharply, and Rikku spared Yuna a guilty glance.

The little girl stared back at her. "That's why my father needs the Final Aeon," Yuna pronounced, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. They turned their attention back to the aeon as he rumbled.

With a rush of wind Bahamut leapt away from them, scattering into a myriad of pyreflies that dissipated into the clouds.

Braska straightened, rubbing his forehead. "That… was interesting," he said, looking surprised. Seeing the others around him, he refocused.

Yuna turned and smiled at her father, and Rikku dropped her head in shame. Everyone except Jecht knew what obtaining the Final Aeon really meant, and still Yuna smiled. Then she drew her hands together and performed a perfect bow. "Thank you, father."

Braska's face contorted, but he smoothed his expression and returned Yuna's bow just as deeply. "Auron, Jecht, Rikkma. Let us begin our journey."

And with that Braska was walking away, Jecht and Auron trailing after him towards the distant crystalline forest. Rikku hesitated before following after them, glancing back one last time at Yuna. She was cradled in the embrace of the older woman, but standing on her own, her unwavering eyes fixed onto her father's back. All traces of the little girl's smile were gone. She looked older; Rikku clearly saw the Yuna she knew shining through the youthful chubbiness in her young face. It was in her eyes; they were changing with each step Braska took. Unable to watch the transformation complete itself, Rikku whirled around and sprinted after the others as her throat clenched shut.

.x.x.x.

The small crystals which jutted out of the sandy ground with increasing frequency looked beautiful, but made the path leading into the forest a treacherous one to navigate. Though the glittering formations were delicate, they were also pointed and razor-sharp. Rikku wondered how Jecht managed to do it with bare feet; playing all that Blitzball must have given him soles tougher than a behemoth's hide. Braska was picking his way between the delicate, jagged crystals, and Auron, true to his nature, simply crashed through them, crushing the ones that got in his way under the heavy heel of his boots.

Rikku followed in the wake of the messy path Auron cleared; she didn't bother to chide him for the destruction he was causing because she knew the forest would regenerate in a few days, more dense than ever before. It made her happy to know that the forest itself was growing - still fed and renewed by Shiva's dreams. While she didn't miss Sin's presence in Spira at all, some of the sacrifices they had made to destroy it still hurt, and the gradual disappearance of Macalania was one of them.

The glittering forest was indeed growing thicker as they travelled towards its center; the twisting, reflective tree trunks closed around them, surrounding them with a quiet, chilled beauty.

"I never saw a tree made outta crystal before," Jecht said, catching her attention. She looked up to see him rapping a knuckle against one of the trunks, filling the air with a melodious ring.

Rikku smiled and jogged over to him. "They're not really trees," she explained, flicking a fingernail against the hard trunk. "They just look like them."

"Don't get distracted," Auron called out over his shoulder. "The heart of the forest is infested with powerful fiends. We need to get through here as quickly as possible."

"I see no problem with a short break." Braska stopped and made his way back towards Rikku and Jecht, prompting an exasperated sigh from Auron. Silently, Rikku cheered. His greetings were the first words he had spoken since he left Yuna's side; the depressing silence had been almost deafening. "Come now, Auron, it is not every day that we get to see a sight like this."

"You mean this ain't normal here either?" Jecht asked, clearing away a small patch of ground before seating himself against the tree.

"Travellers rarely journey through Macalania Forest," Braska told them, leaning on his staff. "A Summoner's Pilgrimage is by nature a reflective journey; that is why we must travel the Pilgrimage Road by foot. Most long distance travel in Spira, however, is conducted by sea when possible. It is truly a rare privilege to be able to be here at all."

Auron, who had pulled up next to them, shrugged off his sword and leaned it against the tree, his disapproving scowl still obvious. "The reason no one travels through here are the fiends," he reminded them pointedly.

"Will ya just relax for once?" Jecht groaned. "We ain't seen a single fiend since we started anyway!"

"Yes," Braska said, staring off into the forest with a troubled look. "That is odd."

"You mean lucky," Jecht insisted with a careless smile. Then he looked at Rikku. "Say, whadda ya mean this ain't a real forest?"

"Huh?" Rikku asked. She'd pulled herself up onto one of the larger trunks and was slouched on a high outcrop, swinging her feet as she enjoyed the sights. "Oh… well, see for yourself," she added, pointing at the trunk. "It's all just some kind of ice formation or something, you can almost see right through it! Of course it's not a plant."

Jecht poked at the trunk he was leaning against with surprise. "Ice? But it ain't even cold!"

"It's a summoned forest," Rikku said, leaning back against the trunk and crossing her hands behind her head. "The Fayth in Macalania Temple made it. I guess when Shiva isn't kicking butt as an aeon, she spends her time gardening." She turned her head when she heard no response, and saw all three men staring and nearly slipped off of the trunk in surprise. "What?"

"Shiva?" Jecht asked.

"The Fayth which resides in Macalania Temple," Braska answered absently. "Rikkma, that is an interesting theory you have, but no one really knows how or why Macalania Forest was created. How did you come up with that idea?"

Rikku scrunched up her nose. "It's not a theory. The locals told me!"

"People live here?" Jecht repeated, looking even more surprised. "I thought there were fiends."

"There are fiends. That's why no one lives here," Auron agreed, suspicious.

Rikku sat up, filled with indignation. She might have learned the truth of the forest well after Sin was gone and the demi-humans were forced to flee from their crumbling homeland, but that didn't change the fact that they had always lived in Macalania Forest. Everyone knew that. No, the problem was that most other races didn't think of the demi-humans as people; that was why they didn't count in Auron's assessment of the forest's population.

"You know, if you Yevonites would actually listen to your musicians instead of just telling them to shut up and play, maybe you'd figure out this stuff too," she huffed. "They're the ones who told me, for your information. They know this forest better than anyone else!" She noted with satisfaction that Auron fell silent after her sharp rebuttal, looking surprised.

Braska, too, had gone quiet. "I had always suspected there was more to those creatures than they led us to believe," he mused. "Strange, though, that they would share this knowledge with a human like yourself. They seem to prefer to keep to themselves."

"Yeah, well…" Rikku trailed off; the truth of the matter was the demi-humans probably wouldn't have given her the time of day if not for their disappearing forest and Tobli's constant meddling. "I'm well-travelled!" she explained. "And who can resist this face?" she added with a cute pout.

"Would you like a list?" Auron replied. Ignoring the face she made, he addressed Braska once more. "We should move on, my lord. This lack of fiends is… worrisome," he said uneasily.

Braska nodded once, leaning over and helping Jecht to his feet. "Yes. We can discuss our theories about the forest when we are closer to the safety of the temple," he agreed.

Rikku shimmied down the trunk. When she hit the ground, it trembled and shook underneath her, and she flung her arms out in surprise before tumbling.

"Whoa!" Jecht yelled, also trying to catch his balance. "How much do you weigh anyhow?"

"It's not me!" Rikku leapt to her feet and pulled out her daggers.

"Something's coming," Auron said tersely, and that was the only warning they had before the crystalline trees splintered and flew apart. Rikku covered her head and winced; the atmosphere felt heavy and deadened. Most unnervingly of all, everything was quiet except for the crash of the splintering trees. Then she heard it: a low hiss, the sound of something slicing through the air.

I know this music, Rikku thought. She lowered her arms and squinted through the rain of splinters that were falling around her. Jecht had thrown Braska to the ground for protection, and Auron stood over them, his sword a blur as he hacked apart the larger chunks of crystal that flew in their direction. Beyond him, behind her, all around them, she saw what caused the explosion, and her stomach churned.

"We're bein' attacked by fiends?" Jecht asked, fumbling for the handle of his sword.

"No," Rikku moaned, springing to her feet and spinning her daggers. She rushed at the nearest pod, striking it before it could burst open and send its creation tumbling out. "This is Sinspawn!"

The deadly shower thinned out, but as the dust settled the cause of the explosion became visible; a greater Sinspawn, ugly and black, pulsed in a clearing only a few steps away. It spewed pods into the their surroundings over its waving tentacles. While huge, it was thankfully alone; there was no sign of Sin itself in the area. Not that this was very reassuring; the spawn alone was already the size of Bahamut, and it was still belching eggs in every direction.

"We must destroy it!" Braska twirled his staff around in the summoning dance. It was a harsh first test to flex his fledgling Summoner's muscles on.

Rikku didn't bother to reply, rushing another pod and trying to burst it before it could hatch and release the insect-like spawn hibernating inside. She only managed to hack through the hard shell halfway before it burst open on its own, nearly severing her arm in the process. The lesser spawn inside spilled out and snapped at her viciously. She buried her dagger between its shining eyes up to the hilt, and the thing twitched spasmodically before dissolving into pyreflies. To her dismay, she saw the other pods bursting open, releasing dozens more into the forest.

"You've got to be shittin' me," Jecht groaned, rushing at one of the creatures with his sword and cleaving it in two.

"This is no joke!" Auron hacked through the hissing creatures; a trail of pyreflies followed his motions, and Rikku realized he was driving towards the larger Sinspawn. "Clear a path to the mother!" he yelled at Jecht, carving his way through several more of the insects.

Rikku positioned herself at Braska's side, narrowly managing to kick away one of the creatures as he completed his dance. She heard Bahamut's roar echo, then winced as a burst of light cut through the forest, destroying both the remaining trees and several of the spawn in its path. The dragon landed in the smoking clearing and grappled with the huge Sinspawn, roaring in fury. Rikku half-turned and saw Braska holding his staff out, his expression distant.

"Oh no," she moaned, skirting around him and flicking her daggers about, trying to keep the smaller creatures away from him. "Auron! Jecht! We're in deep pickles over here!" She batted away another spawn and then sending a Fire spell hurtling behind her with a quick mumble.

Rikku knew she was fast, but she wasn't that fast, and there were just too many to take on alone. "Auron!" she yelled again, flying towards another fiend and slashing at it. It was no good; her light hits weren't killing any of them, simply enraging the insects and making them swarm even more densely than before. "Braska's in Rapture! He can't move!"

What's keeping them? Rikku thought, panicking as the spawn encroached on the small haven she maintained around Braska. She grimaced and took a deep breath; casting high-level magic beyond her natural means from the grid always felt uncomfortable, but it couldn't be helped. She had to cut down their enemies before they were overwhelmed.

Fixing one hand on her grid, she spread her palm out towards the thickest concentration of fiends and closed her eyes. The sibilant words tumbled out of her mouth, spoken in a language she didn't know, with a finesse that she didn't possess. Power flowed through them, forming into a pinpoint in the palm of her hand; she gathered it, feeling the rush of an unnatural breeze as the casting glow surrounded her, then let the magic fly.

It wasn't the most powerful of spells; while Rikku could have cast a stronger elemental attack, completely obliterating only one of the insects wouldn't have helped very much. Instead she cast gravity magic, letting the crackle of dark energy descend over the entire writhing mass surrounding them. The Demi spell drained the creatures and sent more than a few of them skittering backwards. There were even a few injured ones which collapsed on themselves, pyreflies leaking out of the wounds her daggers had already inflicted. Rikku smiled grimly; not the best solution, but it had bought them a little time.

"Will you guys get over here!" She turned to search for the familiar red flash of Auron's coat. Then she froze, her words caught in her lungs. He was there, a few feet before her, fighting desperately. His sword was nothing more than a flash of dark metal surrounded by swirling pyreflies as he eliminated the fiends surrounding him. But he wasn't moving towards her or Braska; he was trapped. Trapped into defending, not attacking - and what he was defending was the motionless lump on the ground.

"Jecht!" The large man was unconscious, a small trickle of blood leaking from his mouth and a gaping wound oozing from his abdomen. Despite Auron's lessons, he really didn't know how to handle his sword yet. Auron was doing a magnificent job of defending his fallen comrade, but he couldn't stop the steady flow of blood that was leaking from Jecht into the crystalline ground and keep the insects at bay at the same time.

Rikku reached for her pouch and cursed when she found nothing; I knew we needed supplies! There was no time to think; she rushed the nearest fiend and gritted her teeth, then drove her hand through it. It shuddered and gave way beneath her probing fingers; she reached in and searched, pulling through its body for anything that might help.

Despite being a first-rate thief, Rikku hated stealing from fiends. She hated it more than she hated lightning. The principal was fairly sound; fiends were formed from the malcontent of the dead, and occasionally the dead were kind enough to bundle their hatred into a form solid enough to pull from their bodies. Usually it was a remnant of their former life, a wish, hope or dream they once had while still human. It didn't change the fact that doing it felt disgusting to her. It took a special state of mind to steal from a fiend: telling yourself over and over again that it wasn't real, that it wasn't leather and bone and cartilage you were shoving your fingers through, but pyreflies-pyreflies-pyreflies. Sometimes it didn't work, and the unlucky thief ended up smashing his fingers against the very solid skin, fur or scale of the disgruntled and unforgiving fiend; the lucky ones came away from those failed attempts with all of their limbs intact.

Sinspawn was worse; though still pyreflies, there was nothing human at all left in them, unlike the fiends. When she attempted to steal from spawn, more often than not she came away with the oddest things; rusty blades, a razor-toothed comb or odd, unidentifiable gem that flickered in the light. This time was no different; when she sprang back, the object in her hand was a twisted rosette of metal; she had no idea what it was, or what it would do if she attempted to use it.

Not good! she thought, panicking as she chopped at another one of the insects that circled Braska. A loud roar made her glance up; Bahamut seemed to be winning against the largest creature, which meant that Braska might be able to come out of his Rapture soon. It was a gamble with Jecht's life, however, and a risky one at that. There was only one way to be certain. It was something she had been hoping to put off until much later, like never, but desperate times called for desperate measures. Rikku only hoped none of her companions were voyeurs. Then she corrected that train of thought and gave a silent whisper of thanks that Jecht was passed out.

The fiends backed away from her when she began to glow. Even Auron faltered and turned to look, his eyes widening in shock. And then the sphere took over; it wasn't just a change of outfits, but a change of personality, as Paine had once described it. She was still herself, of course, they all were, but there was something extra that was added: a phrase or two, an attitude, an unconscious gesture of the hand. The personalities recorded in the spheres never completely disappeared, no matter who used them. And while Rikku had created the Alchemist dressphere herself, it was still like adding oil to a lit fire. Pride, self-confidence, and an unbelievable amount of fury filled her as she raised her hands and let the gun form in her arms.

Useless? An embarrassment to all of Spira? How dare they treat us like this!

Rikku's lips curled back into an ugly snarl and she unleashed her anger onto the surrounding fiends, spraying them with a smattering of bullets from her machine gun. "No more Mr. Nice Guy!" she yelled, shoving her way through the insects and blasting those that were too foolish not to move point-blank with her gun. A few of them managed to score her armor, but thankfully her outfit came with much more protective padding than Braska's loaned gift of travel clothes had. Ignoring the small scratches she earned, she reached into her now-bulging pocket and pulled out the potion that conjured itself into her possession. It wasn't enough to save Jecht, but if she gambled right… "Not knowing is the fun part!" she smirked, dumping the potion over the small lump of metal in her hand before lobbing it at Jecht.

"… Rikku!" she heard Auron yell in confusion, and then the rosette hit Jecht's chest and exploded into a corona of light.

It was better than she could have hoped for. Jecht's wounds curled in on themselves and knit together with unnatural speed. His eyes flew open, full of surprise as the rosette continued to flare and disintegrate. Rapidly whirling discs of color surrounded him and burst outwards; they encompassed Auron, Braska and even herself. She noted with satisfaction that the wounds on her own body were healing at the same time the artificial speed kicked in.

"Woo-HOO!" she screamed, levelling her gun at a few more fiends and blasting them away. "I'm gonna show you guys how to party like only we can do it!" She charged recklessly into the enemy swarm, firing several bursts from her machine gun.

Auron and Jecht doing much the same with their respective weapons; the explosive protective and regenerative properties that her unknown mix granted them swayed the tide of the battle in their favor. Bahamut landed the finishing blow on the source of their troubles, and it wasn't long before they managed to do the same to the few remaining sinscales scattered through the rubble. When it was over, the four of them stood panting amidst a circle of pyreflies and the ruins of smashed trees.

"Holy shit," Jecht managed to say, propping himself up on his sword. "I thought I was a goner!"

"Braska?" Auron asked, helping the Summoner as he sunk to the ground.

"… quite an experience," Braska said, pulling off his helmet. His hair was damp and matted underneath it and his skin was still a few shades paler than normal, even for him. "I'm fine, Auron." He waved the other man off and looked at Rikku. "But what happened to you?"

Rikku rolled her eyes and leaned on one hip, hefting her gun onto her shoulder. A tiny voice in the back of her head whispered that she should probably disengage her garment grid and return to her normal attire, but the rest of her told that voice to shut up and stick it. Instead she opted to stare back at the other men in defiance.

"I made myself comfortable," she answered, flipping her hair over her shoulder. "Why, you Yevonites got a problem with that?" She stared Auron down as she spoke, daring him to make a comment.

Auron frowned in return, his eyes travelling to her belt, where the garment grid was still shining with energy. The sphere and the path she had manipulated to activate it glowed against the stone plate, and his brows drew together. "That is more than just a belt buckle," he observed.

"You catch on pretty quick for a fool," Rikku responded acerbically, and the three men stared at her in shock. "What? I just call 'em like I see 'em," she added, letting her eyes drop onto Braska. "This whole Pilgrimage is a sham, and people who believe all that junk that Yevon spews really are the fools." She did drop her head as she spoke, guilt niggling at her conscience. "Sorry, Braska," she muttered almost unwillingly. "But it's the truth!"

"The truth?" Auron said, his face tight with anger. "You lied to us about who you are and what you can do." His grip on his sword shifted, and he glared at her. "You've changed, and I don't think I like it."

Rikku made a rude gesture in Auron's direction and shrugged. "Who cares what you think?" she fired back. "You're just another brainless follower of Yevon, as blind and stupid as the rest. I don't need you or your church's blessings!" She crossed her arms and turned up her nose. "Boy, you jerks sure have a crappy way of thanking me for saving your butts, by the way."

"Hey, slow down there, Blondie!" Jecht said, towering over Rikku. "Auron ain't my favourite person in the world either. But he's right, and I'm gonna make ya pay for forcin' me to say that. What the hell is wrong with you?" he asked.

"Ooh! Not you too!" Rikku fumed, clenching her fist and stalking away from him. She paced back and forth before them, angry and restless at everything she had been robbed of. Her life, her Home, her respect… everything was gone in the blink of an eye, crushed under Yevon's iron-fisted rule, and she couldn't do anything about it. It made her want to just blow stuff up.

Rikku's pacing came to an abrupt halt as an obstacle presented itself in her way; with a start she realized she was face-to-face with two clear blue eyes, both of which had her trapped under their steady gaze. Braska's hands were on her shoulders; when did they get there? Her uncle, the only Summoner that had ever been truly worth saving, with the exception of Yuna, and in the end the only one they couldn't save. He was practically one of them, she thought with a guilty conscience; he was family.

"Rikkma," he said. "This isn't you."

"But it is me!" she protested. "It's in my eyes and my hair and my beliefs and my blood! This is who I really am!" She made a half-hearted attempt to shrug herself out of his grip.

Braska shook his head, refusing to release her. "Let it go, Rikkma."

Rikku blinked away the unexpected tears that rose in her eyes. "But I'm Al Bhed," she repeated stubbornly.

"No," Braska corrected her. "You are more."

Rikku reached for her garment grid with shaking fingers and deactivated it, and when the flaring light faded, the vicious, bubbling fury disappeared with it. The bitter pride and the sadness that had brought it about didn't, though, and she let herself crumple against him in exhaustion, sobbing out her loss.

Abilities used or mentioned:

Mega Flare is Bahamut's special attack.
Conflagration Grid [Rikku]: Demi
Alchemist Dressphere - Mix: Super Mighty G - Shell, Protect, Haste, Regen on all allies

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

11: An Impossible Dream

The light of the fire flickered brightly in the center of their makeshift camp. Though it was warm and cheerful, it couldn't completely banish the ponderous silence of the surrounding forest creeping in at the edges of the light.

Rikku chose to sit further away from the crackling blaze than the others; the cool night air didn't bother her, and she wanted to enjoy the silent forest for just a little longer. The real beauty of Macalania only came out in the deepest of night, under the light of the cold moon and the pyreflies which drifted aimlessly through the trees. The forest glittered, its crystal and water turned into precious metals by the evening's darkness, and its pyreflies fallen stars from the heavens.

One drifted very close to Rikku's face, and she reached out and wrapped her hand around it. A moment later it passed through her palm and continued floating away into the night. It was hard to believe that the beautiful, tiny point of light was the cause of so much danger in the otherwise peaceful forest.

"So tell me about the spheres," Jecht said, and she turned to face him.

He had followed her out to the low trunk she was leaning against after they made camp; he wanted to thank her for saving his life, but she knew it was also in part because of Auron's behavior. The other man was still furious and hadn't so much as glanced in her direction, much less spoken a word since they'd decided to retire for the evening. She was grateful for Jecht's attempt to smooth things over, but not in the mood for his usual jokes. Thankfully, he seemed to understand that.

"What do you want to know about them?" she asked, taking a blank recording sphere out of her pouch and throwing it at Jecht. He caught it and turned it around in his hands, inspecting the glowing liquid trapped in its interior.

"Braska says they're made here," he said, holding it to his ear and shaking it. "So it's filled with water or somethin'?"

"It's not really water-water," Rikku noted. She pointed at a tiny stream trickling by their feet; one of many winding their way towards the lakes that pooled in the deep forest. "Memories can be trapped here, captured and reflected by the crystal water. That's why people sometimes go into the woods to harvest it and make spheres."

Jecht was now squatting by the stream and dipping his fingers into it. He sniffed them and turned back to Rikku. "Don't smell different from normal water," he noted. He licked his fingers and then shrugged. "Don't taste different either."

"It's purer than normal water," Rikku corrected him. "Otherwise I'd be really grossed out that you just licked the ground like that. Honestly, I bet your fingers are grubbier than anything in that stream though." She smirked and Jecht made a half-hearted rude gesture at her.

"Everyone's a comedian," Jecht grumbled. Then he scratched his head. "So… why ain't there more people here if this water is so damn special? Those spheres we bought in Bevelle cost an arm and a leg! In Zanarkand people would be all over this stuff if we could sell it for that much."

"Well, besides the fiends, there's another problem," Rikku explained. "It's a risky job. I'd rather go diving for machina than collect sphere water."

Jecht stood up and flicked a few droplets of water at her. "What other problem? I don't see why we can't just bottle this stuff up while we're here and sell it at the next town. We'd be rich!"

Rikku shook her head. "That isn't the purest water, the one you can make spheres out of. You have to go diving in one of the lakes to get the really good stuff."

Jecht thumped his chest. "Divin'? You forget I'm a Blitzball pro already? That's kid stuff!"

"It's not the diving that's the problem," Rikku answered, rolling her eyes. "The deeper you go, the purer it gets. Really pure water can conduct memories the best. That's why no one ever wants to work as a harvester. You have to face your own memories."

"What's so bad about that?" Jecht asked, shrugging his shoulders.

Rikku nibbled on her lip. "You'd probably see things. Things that are - important - to you down there. You can't work as a harvester if you have too many regrets. You might drown." She didn't elaborate on the why; Jecht didn't need to know that most water harvesters didn't drown by accident. He also didn't need to know that no one in Spira lived without regret. Sin touched everyone's lives, whether directly or indirectly. Only people who were strong enough to resist the temptation of their own memories and desires could collect water. The job became addicting all too quickly, and a high mortality rate accompanied it. In Macalania Forest, regrets could kill almost as effectively as Sin did.

"It's just a bad idea, alright?" she finished. "Promise me you won't try it."

"Fine," Jecht muttered. "I still say we're passin' up a golden opportunity here."

"There'll be others." Rikku curled her legs under herself and rested her chin on her knees. She noticed Jecht's quick glance back towards the campfire and gave him a reassuring smile. "Go on," she told him. "I'll be fine out here."

"You sure?" Jecht asked. " 'Cause I can knock some sense into his head if ya want."

Rikku shook her head. "I'll take a rain check on that," she told him with a devilish grin. "But it's okay for now. Get back there and have your dinner or something."

"Okay. But if you don't come back soon, I ain't savin' you any," he added.

Rikku stuck her tongue out at his retreating back, then returned her gaze to the trees. She wasn't hungry anyway; her stomach was still twisted into tense knots. "I'm so out of place here." Relaxing, she rested her head against her arms. She mused over what she had told Jecht, her eyes drifting towards the little stream that ran by her feet. It was a sliver of platinum against the dark ground, radiant and beautiful.

Most Al Bhed wouldn't even enter Macalania Forest; it was reviled almost as much as the Farplane. The memory-water was the reason; it was as cruel as the pyreflies in flaying open a person's innermost heart. The strange liquid was achingly pure, free of any sediment to cloud its revelations. Everything in the forest was like that: clean, smooth and polished, even the fiends. It was the opposite of what made the Al Bhed who they were. Her people were gritty, sandy and rough, only comfortable in muddy waters that was as dirty as they were. The water in Macalania was too perfect, just a little too sweet and cold. This was Braska's kind of water, not hers.

With a sigh, Rikku pushed off from the trunk and made her way back towards the camp. Hungry or not, free food was never something to be turned down. Auron didn't acknowledge her return, though Braska gave her a quick nod and Jecht threw a spit of something roasted at her. She sat down and nibbled at the food, trying to catch up on the conversation Jecht and Braska were having.

"So those were just pieces of it?" Jecht asked.

Braska nodded. "Yes. Sin always returns for its children. That is why it is our duty to remove them as quickly as possible." He laughed and shook his head. "Though this was not quite how I imagined my first battle with an aeon would occur…"

"Sin can strike anywhere, at any time," Auron interrupted tersely. "The question is what it was doing in Macalania Forest in the first place. It doesn't seem to be travelling towards Bevelle. It might have been heading for the Thunder Plains or the Calm Lands, but there aren't any large settlements to destroy in either area." His voice was low and smooth, but Rikku could hear the tension underneath his words; he was still angry.

Rikku set aside her half-eaten stick of roast, passing it onto Jecht when he gestured. Auron was still miraculously ignoring her despite the fact that she was sitting across from him. He hadn't bothered to look at her since she transformed, and Rikku couldn't really say that she blamed him. She studied him over the firelight, knowing that his stubbornness would prevent her from being caught staring.

I was ready to shoot him earlier because of that stupid dressphere, she thought with a pang of guilt. She knew Auron hated being lied to, and being caught in such a huge, noticeable lie made her feel awkward and deeply embarrassed. It was as though she let him down somehow - which was stupid, really, because he was the one who had done all the lying when they first met, with that whole thing about being dead.

She scowled at him in annoyance. So maybe he hadn't been lying; they'd never bothered to ask him to clarify that crack Seymour took about his dead-guy smell. And it was no wonder he wanted to keep it a secret - the Unsent were universally despised in Spira as harbingers of discord and destruction, usually for good reason. But a lie by omission was still a lie in Rikku's book, so in her opinion he was just as bad as she was. Auron probably wouldn't have agreed with her logic if he could hear the argument she was having in her head. He wasn't paying her enough attention to talk at all, though.

"Sin must have passed here not long ago." Braska was speaking now. Rikku turned her attention onto the Summoner; freed of his heavier outer robe and helmet, he looked younger and frailer than normal. Creases of weariness wrinkled the corners of his eyes, but despite that he appeared to be calm and peaceful. It was as if seeing one of his Guardians pull out a secret Al Bhed weapon and then subsequently being insulted by said Guardian was an ordinary, everyday occurrence. She didn't understand why Braska didn't seem to be as upset with her as Auron was. She had, after all, called him a Yevonite too. And he was, sort of, despite being an outcast from the official church. But Braska was still a Summoner, and in Rikku's mind that was even more clergic than being a Warrior Monk. Wait, is clergic even a real word? she wondered. Well, it was now.

"… Guadosalam." Braska was still speaking with the others; they were trying to determine Sin's destination.

"What?" she said in shock, snapping out of her brooding silence. "But it can't! The Farplane is there!" A flutter of panic caused her heart to hammer against her ribcage. She had never heard of Sin attacking the Farplane before, but that was no guarantee that it wasn't possible. The Farplane would always exist in Spira, no matter what havoc Sin might wreck. But that didn't mean that the city built around it couldn't be razed. And if the city was destroyed, her chance to visit the Farplane would be destroyed along with it. "It just can't!" she blurted out.

Jecht scratched his head and picked at his teeth with the crystalline spit. Smacking his gums together, he raised an eyebrow. "What's a Farplane?"

"Something the Al Bhed have no respect for or belief in," Auron answered him, still ignoring Rikku.

Rikku winced. "The Farplane is where the souls of the dead go to find peace, if they don't become fiends. It's one of the most important places in the entire world, everybody knows that." She glared at Auron. "Even the Al Bhed!"

"Hmph," Auron replied.

Jecht grimaced and ducked his head as both ends of the clipped argument were fired in his direction. "Keep me outta this," he said, raising his hands in self-defense. "If you two are gonna argue, do it with each other. I ain't your personal blitzball."

Rikku rolled her eyes and focused her attention on Braska instead. Some things were more important than fighting with Auron, and getting back home was one of them. "We have to go there! We have to see if they're okay!" Before Braska could reply, Auron interrupted her. Though he felt fit to give her the cold shoulder, he wasn't so receptive to being ignored either.

"Absolutely not! We're here on Pilgrimage, not to sightsee!" he snarled.

Braska sighed and shook his head. "Auron, calm down. I hardly think stopping by a city recently ravaged by Sin could be considered vacationing. It is also a Summoner's duty to perform the Sending when required."

Rikku smirked and stuck her tongue out at Auron, who only glowered at the fire.

"… but Auron is right," Braska continued, and Rikku's grin faded. "Rikkma, Guadosalam is too far out of the path of our Pilgrimage." He sighed and rubbed a palm over his face. "Even if the city has been attacked, they would only accept our help grudgingly. Yevon's influence is still weak among the Guado. We can serve them best by continuing forward and defeating what Sinspawn we find left in forest."

"But - but -" Rikku stuttered, and this time it was Auron's turn to smirk. She ground her teeth and stared into the bright fire; it looked like an expeditious return to her own time wasn't going to be happening. "It's just wrong!" she grumbled.

"The Summoner has made his decision. Accept it or withdraw from this Pilgrimage." Auron's voice was cutting. Leave it to him to kick her while she was down.

Rikku blinked and looked up from the fire to meet his eyes, her own hurt and anger mixing with the guilt. Seething, she opened her mouth to try and deliver a blow that would humiliate him as much as he had made her hurt, and the best she could come up with was - "Maybe I will!"

The group fell quiet as Rikku and Auron entered yet another staring contest - we seem to do that more than we converse with each other - and then the tension broke as Braska shot to his feet.

"Stop it, both of you." Braska didn't sound upset, but the usual levity in his tone was absent, and his command fell on them like an executioner's axe. They were both guilty and sentenced, with five simple words.

Rikku broke away, flushing; she didn't dare chance a peek at Auron to see what his reaction was, but from his uncomfortable shuffling it seemed he was similarly cowed by Braska's disapproval. Instead, she snuck a glance at Braska. To her surprise, he looked troubled, rather than angered, and his attention was focused on her.

"Rikkma, I want you to walk with me," he said.

"My lord, the Sinspawn -" Auron protested, reaching for his sword and springing to his feet.

Braska moved to Rikku's side and grasped her arm, helping her stand. "I will be fine, Auron," he replied, his voice brokering no argument. "Stay with Jecht." He pulled her away from the warm ring of firelight and deeper into the forest, and the last Rikku saw of the camp was Auron's jaw twitching as he slammed his sword back into the ground.

She turned to look at Braska, who hadn't released her arm as he picked his way through the crystalline forest. His silence was unnerving, and Rikku licked her lips and tried to come up with a comfortable way to start the conversation. "So…" she began, hoping he would fill the pregnant pause.

Braska said nothing and led her deeper into the forest. It was only when he was satisfied that they were far away enough from their camp that he released her arm. The small clearing they had entered was surrounded by a dense crystalline thicket on all sides and housed a wide, shallow lake. Pyreflies drifted over the surface of the water and mingled with the reflection of the stars overhead. Rikku thought it was almost beautiful enough to forget that her Summoner had dragged her out there for the purpose of chastising her.

"Sit," Braska told her, and though it was a command, he didn't say it unkindly. When she was settled comfortably at the water's edge, he joined her and fell into another brooding silence.

Rikku held her breath and didn't even dare fidget; the last thing she wanted to do was upset Braska any more than she already had. The guilt at having thrown a horrible insult his way while under the influence of her dressphere was eating at her, and she was almost looking forward to his punishment as much as she dreaded it. Finally, atmosphere grew so heavy that Rikku cursed to herself and broke the quiet.

"I'm sorry!" she blurted out. "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to call you that, to compare you to one of them -"

Braska looked up at her, faint surprise etched on his face, which then melted into a wry half-smile. "Auron is the one you should say that to," he told her. "Though both of your behaviors leave much to be desired, Auron is hard, proud man. He would never apologize to you first. Though in this case, he does not need to," he added sternly. "It is you who initially wronged him, and therefore you who must take action to repair the damage."

Rikku dropped her head in shame; this was ten times worse than being yelled at by Cid when she was caught doing something wrong. Sure, the throbbing vein in her father's forehead and his red-flushed face was enough to inspire terror in almost anyone when he was angry. Somehow Braska's quiet reprimand felt more painful than any tongue-lashing Cid had ever dished out, though. "Yes, sir," she whispered, feeling lower than the non-existent dirt on the forest floor.

Braska fell back into his silence. Rikku kept her head ducked low and stared into the water. Catching a reflection of herself against the smooth surface of a rock formation jutting outwards, she shifted her gaze to discreetly to study Braska. He hadn't noticed she was also watching him, but she wasn't about to tell. It was a lot easier to be on the receiving end of Braska's scrutiny when he didn't realize she was looking back. She saw rather than heard him sigh, and then braced herself as he opened his mouth once more.

"I gather that it was quite an interesting transformation you performed back there," he said, attempting a casual tone. "I wish I could have witnessed it for myself."

Rikku canted her head in confusion. It didn't sound like he was trying to punish her for insulting Auron. In fact, it sounded like he was trying to lighten the mood. Too bad she was still feeling heavier than Wakka during the second half of a Blitzball game. Which brought back memories of Wakka and Lulu and oh machina she was never going get to see Vidina grow up - Rikku took a deep, shaky breath and forced herself to calm down. "You were a little busy."

"Yes… I am very grateful that you managed to save Jecht's life with that tool of yours. We all are." Rikku kept her head lowered, and Braska's encouraging smile faltered. Then it returned, wider and even more determined than before. "Is it the latest Al Bhed invention?" he prodded. Rikku gave a half-hearted nod, and Braska continued doggedly. "Did you create it yourself?"

Watching his reflection waiting for her response, patient and hopeful, Rikku had to give him credit. Braska was tenacious, and he seemed determined to pull her out of her depressive funk. Resisting his attempts to draw her into more pleasant conversation was causing her almost as much guilt as starting the argument with Auron, and so she gave up without much struggle.

"Uh-uh," Rikku said, looking up and meeting his eyes. "Actually, I don't even know how it really works," she admitted. "I got it as a gift from a friend of mine, he's the real genius. I just use it!"

Braska laughed, a surprisingly pleasant sound which echoed into the tinkling crystal forest. "Forgive me," he said, still smiling at her. "But I happen to know that this is how most Al Bhed inventions function. It often seems to me that the discoveries made by your people are more a matter of luck than knowledge."

"Hey! Our machina is perfectly safe! Most of the time," she mumbled with a pout, which only caused Braska to laugh even louder.

"You must excuse me once more," he managed to say, "I mean no offense… by all means, please continue with your machina experiments. I would advise you not to reveal your scientific method, however - you'll whittle away at what little Jecht has left of Auron's composure." His good humor was infectious, and Rikku felt her dark mood being chased away as she giggled in agreement.

After a moment their laughter died out, and Braska eyed her belt with curiosity. "Tell me, though. Are you quite sure that it is not dangerous?"

"Not really," Rikku said. "You know what they say. Risk big win big!" Braska didn't look very happy at her declaration, so she grinned and winked at him. "Relax! I've been using it for over three years now and nothing bad's ever happened before. I'm pretty sure it's safe." Noticing Braska's curious glance, she decided on a whim to unhook her belt and slid it off of her waist, offering it to him. "It's okay, you can touch it. It's called a garment grid, and it works by sticking spheres into the holes." She pointed as she spoke, displaying the paths and the nodes on the grid. "The grid itself has a little magic in it, but what it can do really depends on the spheres you load into it."

"Just ordinary recording spheres?" Braska asked, studying the grid.

"Yeah," Rikku said. "It summons the memories of the things recorded in the spheres and transforms you into a different person. Sort of. It's kinda hard to explain," she said. "You're still you, you're just… different."

"I see," Braska said slowly. "Amazing. So who did it transform you into?"

Rikku blushed and bit her lip. "Well, that's the thing. I call that one the Alchemist and I, uh, well, I sorta made that sphere myself." She winced at Braska's open look of surprise.

"Then why in Spira did it change your personality so?" he asked, bemused.

Rikku sighed and fidgeted nervously. "Well, I filled that sphere with memories of Home. I don't know, I guess it sort of overwhelmed me." She gave Braska a weak smile. "I miss being surrounded by people who understand and accept me. I miss my friends and my family. I miss not being able to go back," she told him. Just another little white lie, cloaked in generous wrapping of truth.

"I think I understand," Braska replied. Then, fingering the sphere she had touched, he gave her a cautious smile. "Would you mind if I viewed…"

Rikku paled immediately and shook her head. "No!" she shouted at him. Then, embarrassed, she tried to salvage something from her outburst. "It's, uh, personal. I like to keep those memories to myself," she explained. Yeah… and you'd totally freak if you saw me working with Father too, she thought.

Braska looked mortified - he'd assumed he'd crossed some sort of personal boundary that just didn't exist, Rikku realized. She instantly felt horrible. He was only trying to help cheer her up; her yell had given him the appearance of a kicked puppy.

"Ah, well then…" he said, holding the belt out towards her, his tone apologetic.

Rikku stared at it, and then snapped her fingers. "I know!" she said. "You can do something better than watching the sphere. Why don't you test it out yourself?"

Braska froze and stared at her as if she had gone mad. "What?"

Rikku gave him a reassuring smile and pushed the belt back towards him. "Seriously! Try it on! I already told you, it's perfectly safe. It's only fair, since you missed out on watching me use it." Despite her reassurances, Braska still looked uncertain, so Rikku stuck out her lower lip and sulked. "Aww, come on, don't you trust me?"

And that was the question. Silence fell as Braska continued to stare at the belt, and Rikku struggled to hold her hand steady. It wasn't so much that the belt was heavy; more that the weight of the challenge she had thrown out to Braska both surprised and scared her. She hadn't been planning on testing him when she made her offer, it just sort of tumbled out as she realized the import of her question too late. She held her breath and prayed; not you too, Braska. It's bad enough with Auron already.

To her great relief, Braska smiled at her, trusting and open as he lifted the belt out of her grasp. Rikku nearly cried with relief when she saw that smile; Yuna's little smile that could convince her to do anything, even become a Guardian. It was just as potent coming from the original source. After removing his own thickly embroidered belt, Braska sucked in his breath and clasped her garment grid closed over his robes. He chuckled after ensuring it was secure; Rikku could barely contain her own grin.

"Auron will never forgive either of us if he finds out," Braska said to her mischievously.

"Then we just won't tell him!" Rikku laughed, feeling the tension ease out of her muscles. She took another long look at Braska. "Wow! You actually fit into my belt," she snickered. "You look so pudgy underneath all those robes, it's kind of hard to believe you're as skinny as me!"

"That's because I'm not," Braska admitted with a slight wheeze. "I think I'll be able to manage without passing out, though," he added, settling the belt as best he could around his waist.

Rikku helped Braska to his feet with a sullen pout. "Yeah, well it isn't fair. I see how much you eat, and you're still as skinny as a twig! Do you know how many girls would kill to have a body like yours?"

"Not quite as many who would come after you, I imagine," Braska replied smoothly, and Rikku flushed and realized he was still holding on to her hand. Extracting her palm from his grip, she cleared her throat. "Well, let me explain a few things first," she said. "Did you feel that little tickle when you put it on?"

Braska nodded, looking down at the belt. "Yes. Strange, it almost felt like… being hit by a mild thunder spell," he mused. "I can feel it still, inside of me, as though it's waiting to be released."

"That's the grid supplying you with black magic," Rikku explained, grinning at Braska's look of surprise. "I can't actually cast much more than the basic elemental spells," she admitted with a bit of shame.

"But I thought you told Auron that you had high-level abilities. And I could have sworn I saw the remnants of a gravity spell…" Braska prodded.

"I know what I told Auron," Rikku said, cringing under the open admission of another lie. "But that's where the grid comes in! I can cast almost anything when I'm wearing it. It's just not me doing the casting, see?"

"No, not really," Braska admitted.

"Oh… here, it's just easier to show you," Rikku said in exasperation. She spun around the clearing, finally selecting a large tree trunk near the pond and pointing at it. "Just cast a Fire spell at that," she said.

Braska shook his head. "I'm a healer, Rikkma, not a warrior mage. I cannot cast elemental spells."

Rikku stomped her foot and pointed at the trunk again. "Don't think about it, just point and cast! You just have to feel like you want to do it and grid will take care of the rest."

Braska hesitated, looking from her to the target. He stretched his arm out towards it and a small crease appeared in his brow, but nothing happened. Rikku shook her head. "Just believe," she insisted.

He opened his mouth, and the words slipped out almost as quickly as the surprise on his face. The familiar-looking casting glow surrounded him, and Rikku smiled in approval. Her smile froze as a massive explosion hit the trunk with so much force it made the ground quake. The blast of the spell broke off many of the larger branches and shattered them, spraying broken shards several feet up into the air. A shocked silence fell between Summoner and Guardian as tiny bits of crystal pattered around them like rain, dusting their heads with silvery powder.

Rikku managed to close her mouth before she inhaled too much of it, and then turned to Braska. His own eyes looked as wide as hers felt. "What was that?" she screeched when she could find her voice again. "I told you to cast a Fire spell at it. A Fire spell!"

At least Braska had the sense to look apologetic. "I thought I might try a Firaga," he said with a weak grin. "I… ah… wasn't expecting such a violent reaction."

Rikku gaped. "That wasn't just a Firaga, that was more like a meteor meltdown!" She thought back to Shinra's explanation of the magic grids: that a person's innate casting abilities could also have an affect on the grid's own power. And Braska evidently had an impressive amount of magic power to spare.

"I think I understand how your grid works now," Braska coughed.

"You know, maybe you should look into learning some black magic on your own," Rikku muttered, trying to cover her jealousy. "Considering how much of a punch you can pack, you'd kick some serious butt!"

Braska's face clouded, and he shook the crystalline powder out of his robes. "I do not think I will have the time," he admitted.

The smile faded from Rikku's face. "Don't say that," she murmured, feeling their brief interlude of happiness slipping away.

"… why don't you tell me how these spheres work?" Braska gave her a hopeful smile; Rikku guessed she wasn't the only one not ready to return to their grim duties as Summoner and Guardian just then.

"Umm," Rikku hummed in agreement, moving closer. "I'm going to activate the Alchemist dressphere for you, that's the one I was using earlier." She reached for the belt and Braska tensed. "Don't be afraid," she reassured him. "You'll still be yourself. Just… with a little Al Bhed flair!" She waited until he gave her a curt nod, and then ran a finger over the sphere, activating the node and then stepping back.

Light filled the clearing, but disappeared in a flash; Braska didn't even have time to grunt in surprise before the change overtook him. It was quite a sight, considering how thick and loose-fitting his normal attire was. Dressphere transformations tended to occur with a flair for drama, and with his many-layered robe whipping and glowing around him Braska's transformation was definitely operatic. For a few brief seconds, he looked like some strange, crystalline spirit conjured by the forest itself. Then the transformation was complete, and Braska was standing before her, only different.

And how different! Rikku swallowed. Yes, it was Braska in front of her, but he was no longer standing. He was slouching in a very un-Braska-like way, arrogant, with an uncharacteristic smirk on his face that could have rivalled one of Jecht's. Gone were the loose, flowing robes, and in its place was typical Al Bhed battle gear, form-fitting and covering him from head to toe. There was even a pair of goggles holding back his long brown hair. That and his piercing blue eyes were the only things that gave away the fact that he wasn't Al Bhed. Those eyes were in the process of appraising her with newfound interest. Rikku felt herself staring and tried to remind herself that he was Yuna's dad. Yuna's apparently very hot dad, underneath all those robes. No wonder aunt Raenn ran away with him.

"So how do I look?" Braska's voice was calm; despite his shocking physical appearance, his attitude was much more laid-back and relaxed than her own. Still, there was something less reserved about his movements as he sauntered over to pond and took in his own reflection.

Rikku managed to tear her eyes away from his finely muscled backside and give herself a huge mental backhand. Braska! It's uncle Braska, she chanted to herself, holding her head and shaking it. She looked up and noticed Braska watching her reaction with a self-conscious frown; that helped ease her mind somewhat. The dressphere might have seemed to change him, but he was still a far cry from being as over-confident as most travelling Al Bhed needed to be.

"Fantastic," Rikku reassured him. "Better than I thought you'd look," she admitted, joining his side and staring at his reflection in the pool. Then she elbowed him in the ribs with a sly grin. "I mean, wow. This really should be the new fashion trend for all the guys in Spira. Think about it, Jecht might actually stop scaring people away if he tried it out!"

Braska grinned and nudged her back with his own elbow. "This, and excommunication from the Church of Yevon," he added.

Rikku only rolled her eyes upwards. "It's not as bad as you think, you know. You should try it. It's freeing."

"I think I'll pass," Braska answered, squatting. Rikku had to suppress a giggle at the incongruity of it all; people like Braska didn't squat, they gracefully folded. Though she had to admit he did make squatting look good.

"You find my appearance that amusing?" Braska asked with an easy smile. "Then you are a liar, even if a kind one."

Rikku crouched down next to him. "Sometimes people need a little white lie, you know?" The grin froze when she noticed Braska reaching out for her; he grabbed one of her dangling braids and slipped it through his palms, letting his fingers twirl around a glass bead.

"You have beautiful hair," he told her, playing with the braid. Silence settled as he waited for her to respond to his advance; it stretched thin when she didn't. His fingers stilled around the bead, and his face was open as he gazed at her. "I don't even know why I'm telling you this," he stated, almost apologetic. Rikku leaned away from him and he released her hair.

"I do," she told him. "It's the dressphere. It lets you do things you normally couldn't. Or wouldn't."

Braska sat back on his heels, looking thoughtful. "You're right," he admitted. "I think I understand now. I feel so free... willing to say things I would normally prefer to keep to myself." He gave her a sidelong glance. "However..."

Rikku swallowed again and couldn't bring herself to meet his eyes a second time.

"This... costume... it doesn't change the way you really feel, does it? It simply makes those feelings stronger."

"... yeah." Rikku kept her head down, and Braska continued to look at her. She twitched and felt sweat beading on the back of her neck. "I'm not her," she said, her voice low. "I'm not your wife."

"I know," Braska replied. More silence followed. Then he took a deep breath. "You should know that Auron..." He paused, but Rikku's head had already snapped up to watch him at the mention of the other man's name. Braska looked disturbed, as though he was wrestling with himself. Finally, he sighed and continued. "... is many things. Angry, and flawed in his own way. But he is not what you think."

"What do you mean?" Rikku asked, watching him closely.

Braska smiled, a faint flash of pain marring his features. "He is no more a Yevonite than I am. Auron is angry because he is still lost. This Pilgrimage... it gives him purpose and duty. I fear sometimes that it is all he has. Auron needs something to believe in, now that Yevon has abandoned him."

Rikku was surprised by the information Braska provided. She thought back on everything she knew about Auron, and his conversation with Kinoc came to her mind. "... You mean that whole thing about how he got passed up for his promotion?"

Braska looked surprised that she knew, but then gave her a slow nod. "He is a still a Warrior Monk in name." Then his gaze grew sharp and knowing. "But a name can hide many things, can't it, Rikk-u-ma."

Rikku grew very quiet, unable to answer him. Braska didn't press her; instead, she heard him deactivating the dressphere. A moment later, she turned her head and saw that he was offering her the belt.

"You should speak with him," Braska told her. "Auron respects you, and the manner in which you hurt him was unfair. He is handling it in the only way he knows how: with anger."

Rikku stared at the belt in her hands, not quite seeing it. "I hurt him? I didn't think I could, not like that." Braska didn't reply at first; he stood, hiding his face in the lengthening shadows.

"We should return to the others," he told her in his usual gentle lilt; calm and peaceful, a voice that gave away nothing of what he might have been feeling or thinking.

Tottering to her feet, Rikku re-attached the belt around her waist. When she looked up, he was moving away from her, drifting back towards the general direction of their camp. "Hey, Braska," she called out to him in a small voice. He looked back; though his face was as smooth as the crystalline lake, she knew it would only take the slightest of disturbances to ripple through his calm demeanor. "Why are you helping me like this?" she asked. "With Auron, I mean. When, you know..." She gestured at him.

Braska smiled and looked away. "Because you are not Raenn," he replied. Then he hesitated. "Because I would never allow the desire for an impossible dream to interfere with those which I can reach." He paused. "Speak with Auron. He will need your strength for this journey." Then Braska resumed his slow path back towards the camp, and after a moment of thoughtful silence, Rikku followed him.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

12: Truce

When they arrived back at the camp, Rikku noted with surprise that Jecht and Auron were talking to one another, rather than arguing or sniping as they usually did. Even more surprising was seeing Auron's Jug of Jolly Jiggers in Jecht's hands.

Jecht took an exceptionally long swig from the jug, then belched. He tried to hand it back to Auron, but the other man eyed him with a hint of disgust and refused, pushing it back.

"Keep it for now," Auron grumbled. "I'll have it disinfected at the next temple."

"Prig," Jecht muttered. He lifted his hand in a lazy greeting towards Rikku and Braska and raised his eyebrows. "You two back already?"

"Yes," Braska said; he smiled as though nothing interesting had occurred in the last half-hour, and Rikku marvelled at his acting skills. Braska noticed Rikku's scrutiny and tilted his head; she could see the message he was delivering beneath his placid expression. Speak with Auron. It wasn't a request. "So, Jecht," he said said, seating himself near the fire. "How much do you know about the Guado?"

Auron looked nonplussed at Braska's interruption of his conversation, and Rikku took the opportunity to sit down next to him. She continued to wriggle and scoot herself over until her thigh was touching the edge of his red overcoat.

Try and ignore that, buster, she thought with a smirk.

Auron glanced down, then pushed himself up and strode to the edge of the firelight. He leaned against one of the thicker trees, crossing his arms. On anyone else it might have looked like a hasty withdrawal; he, however, managed to make the change of position seem like an attempt to better guard their camp.

Rikku: two, Auron: two bazillion, she groaned. Then, gathering her courage, she leapt to her feet. Auron met her eyes and frowned. Before she could reach his side and accuse him of avoiding her, he was already moving, disappearing into the shadowy forest.

Rikku rolled her eyes and set out after him, quickening her pace to keep up with his long strides. Auron's getaway might have been successful if he bothered to employ the stealth that she knew he was capable of; instead, he stomped through the crystal, creating a path of destruction that even a half-blind bunyip could follow. Considering the violence of his retreat, Rikku thought it best to concern herself with avoiding the splinters rather than trying to stop him. After a while he slowed down, and Rikku took a moment to absorb their surroundings.

It wasn't as quiet or peaceful as the small pond Braska had brought her to. There was nothing vaguely romantic about the dark, intimidating forest surrounding them; there was no good place to sit and have a talk, and it wasn't even pleasant to look at considering Auron had ruined half of the scenery just to get there. She resettled her eyes on the back of his red coat and waited.

"Go away," Auron said, not bothering to face her.

"I can't." Rikku dipped her head and scuffed at the ground. "And I'm not sure if I want to."

She looked up and saw that he had turned and was now gifting her with the full intensity of his glare. "You make more noise than a shoopuf in a glass cage."

Rikku's mouth dropped open. "Hello? Excuse me, but did you just forget how we even got here?" She made a flamboyant gesture at the crumbled path behind her.

"Despite that I still heard you following me." Auron scowled. Rikku guessed his complaint was sparked more by disgust with himself for listening for her rather than any clumsiness on her part.

"I hope you're a better Guardian than you are a thief," he added with spite.

"Ouch." That was a cheap shot! It wasn't any cheaper than the ones she'd fired at him while in her Alchemist dressphere, though. Swallowing her pride, Rikku lowered her eyes. "I guess I deserved that."

"Hnn," Auron huffed with an air of superiority, and Rikku decided that her pride didn't taste all that great anyway and needed to be regurgitated.

"... I know how to be a good Guardian!" she snapped. "I learned from the best."

Auron raised a skeptical eyebrow. "You, an Al Bhed, have been on a Pilgrimage before? Let me guess, you even helped defeat Sin once. If you're going to lie to me anyway, why not make it interesting?"

Rikku's nervous sway slowed and she tried to ignore what felt like a punch to her gut. "I didn't follow you to talk about being a Guardian!"

"Then why did you come here?" Auron asked. "That's all we have in common."

Rikku shook her head. "No it's not!"

Another humorless smile graced his face. "So then you admit to sharing traits with a Yevonite?" His voice dripped with sarcasm.

Rikku winced, but held her ground. "I know you're not a Yevonite." Inhale, you can do this Rikku. It's just an angry Auron. He'll make sure your death is quick and painless. "I - was out of line. I'm sorry for insulting you and Braska like that."

The ferocity of Auron's glare was unchanged despite her apology; he didn't trust her. Well, no wonder, but it still hurt.

"I mean it!"

Auron managed to look away, his jaw working as he ground his teeth together. Then, brows furrowing, he nodded at her. "Very well."

The wind blew. A dangling shard of crystal hanging off one of the destroyed trees succumbed to gravity and broke off. The tinkle it made as it shattered filled the awkward lull in their conversation.

"That's it?" Rikku said, flabbergasted. She expected something more dramatic to happen for some reason. Something involving a lot of yelling and perhaps a few pointy edges and most definitely a confrontation. Instead, Auron was accepting her apology too easily. "You mean I just snap my fingers and you forgive me?" she prodded. If there was one thing she had learned, it was that something that seemed too good to be true usually was.

Auron shrugged, the annoyed tilt of his eyebrows remaining fixed. "I can't have you disrupting the group. We need to focus on our duties as Guardians if we want Braska's journey to be successful, and I'll have enough troubles babysitting Jecht as it is. I don't have the time or patience to deal with you, too."

Rikku felt something unpleasant churning in her stomach. It struggled its way up her lungs, growing uglier by the second. Finally it burned her throat, connecting in a sharp, pounding headache between her eyes and spilling out through her lips. Auron thought she and Jecht were problems to be dealt with, not Guardians.

"I don't need to be babysat and neither does he!"

Auron turned away from her. "Hnn," he said again, and Rikku wished she had an Auron primer to translate all of his monosyllabic grunts into a comprehensible language.

"I get that you're mad!" Rikku told him. "I lied to you, okay? I admit it, I lied, and it was a big fat whopper, too. I can't cast all that much black magic and I don't use my daggers to fight unless it's an emergency. Stealing and tooling armor are the only things I can do well on my own. I just… I didn't want you to know and judge me, okay? It's hard enough being Al Bhed in the first place!"

Auron recoiled at her outburst, as though she had physically slapped him with that much honesty. The surprise registered on his face proved he wasn't expecting it from her; that disappointed Rikku more than anything else. Being who he was, of course, Auron recovered from his shock and levelled her with a cool glare.

"A confession, now?" he observed. "I don't want to be your priest, nor do I want to be your nanny." He shook his head with a look of weary disbelief. "Rikku. You spin so many falsehoods that I sometimes wonder if there's any truth left in you at all."

"I'm not lying this time, honest!" She winced at her choice of words and ignored Auron's pointed look. "I really do want to protect Braska. And..." She trailed off, her resolve wavering despite her uncle's unspoken order.

"And?" he said impatiently.

"... I didn't mean to hurt you."

Auron stiffened and his face closed; whereas he had been at least registering anger before, now he was unreadable. And then, he spoke.

"Presumptuous, to assume your actions would do anything other than offend me." He paused before continuing with narrowed eyes. "But I warned you to be careful with Braska."

"Well I'm not talking about how Braska feels right now! I didn't want to hurt you," Rikku repeated, trying to catch his eye. She did, and huffed in frustration when he didn't respond, throwing them into yet another staring contest. She was considering blinking rapidly just to add a little variety to it when he answered her.

"Why?"

"Why what?" Rikku echoed.

Auron's exasperated sigh cut through the air. Well, it wasn't quite the smile she'd been hoping for, but considering his cold shoulder from before, any emotion was progress. "Why didn't you tell me about your weapon?" Auron said, clipping off each word to make sure she understood him.

Rikku fingered her garment grid. "It's not a weapon."

"Fine, your armor," Auron shot back.

"It's not armor either! It's... more complicated than that." She didn't want to explain the garment grid in detail; it had already produced an unexpected result in Braska, and she was beginning to worry about the effect Shinra's ingenious invention might be having on the rest of the Pilgrimage.

"Complicated?" Auron moved towards her and eyed the belt. "I have never in my travels encountered anything like that before. Is it a new secret the Al Bhed are developing to fight Sin?" Rikku didn't answer, and his face pulled into a mild frown. "Is that thing the reason you're an exile?"

Rikku grabbed one of her braids and played with it. "Well, you see… it's complicated."

Auron waited for an explanation that never came. "Isn't it always with you," he growled to himself. Her unwillingness to elaborate led him to make what he thought was the obvious conclusion. "You stole it and now you're running."

"Bite me!" Rikku yelled before she could stop herself. Her temper flared; if she had any doubts about what he thought of her, that certainly cleared the air. He was close by, and she was taller than before, so if she spun quickly enough, there was a good chance that her elbow might connect with his nose before he could dodge - Bad Rikku! Hitting Auron won't solve any of your problems, it'll just make you feel better... until he hits back! Shaking her head, Rikku focused on less dangerous outlets for her annoyance.

"I didn't steal it! This was a gift, for your information." Auron didn't look convinced, but Rikku continued anyway. "I was hoping I wouldn't have to use it at all," she admitted. "I know... I already told you all about my fabulous skills, huh. I guess it was pretty stupid of me to think I could get by without it. I just..." She swallowed. To her surprise, Auron was still listening to her. The frown had eased off of his face, and he watched her, waiting.

"... Well, you know," Rikku mumbled. It was easier to get the words out afterwards, knowing that she hadn't blown all her chances with him. "Using it would be like giving up. Admitting that I can't go back anymore, for real." She held her breath, wondering if the truth would be enough, if he would understand.

"I see," he said.

Rikku fidgeted. "Huh?"

"This is about Sin." He dropped his piercing gaze, his mouth twisting into a strange half-smile that looked more like a grimace. "You are damaged, just like Braska. You lost someone, too."

Rikku stared at his profile, outlined by the light of the surrounding pyreflies. If she squinted, his features blurred and darkened, blending together in the shadows - almost invisible, almost hidden. It would be easy to mistake the shine highlighting his temple for a tuft of grey. She swallowed. "Yeah, you could say that."

Auron shifted and Rikku jumped. "No, don't!" she pleaded. He froze at her words. "Stay like that for just a little longer, okay?"

Instead of listening, he stood to his full height and moved in front of her. "Hnn. Why?" Light cut across his smooth skin and made his eyes glitter; the hard expression on his face chased away the memory of his older self.

"Because you - ! Ugh, nevermind." Be careful with Braska, he told her. Why can't he take his own advice? Or perhaps he could; maybe that was why he shifted when she all she wanted was for him to stay still, his all-too-familiar features tearing at the barely-scabbed wound in her heart.

Auron looked at her, puzzled. "Why are you staring at me?"

"You looked like someone I knew for a minute there," Rikku told him.

Auron's curiosity dissolved into mild disapproval. "Get your head out of the clouds and stop pretending I'm someone else."

Rikku flinched. Why can't you be a little more like your old self? He made no apology for puncturing her illusion. It was unfair, perhaps more than it would have been with anyone else. Not even the man himself could compare with the untouchable legend Rikku had created in her mind.

"If I could do it," Rikku said, sinking to her heels and wrapping her arms around herself. "I mean, if I had the chance to get back the person I lost, I don't know if I would anymore. I thought that's what I wanted, but now I'm not so sure." She felt a weight settle on her shoulder and realized that it was his hand. She was mesmerized by the feel of his strong fingers; their warmth seeped through her clothing, burning an imprint onto the skin below. She never remembered him being warm before.

"Happiness is a rare and temporary thing in Spira," he told her. "You shouldn't feel guilty for opening your heart to your friends, no matter how brief the encounter."

Rikku smirked, wondering if Auron could know how incongruous that advice was, coming from him. "Even if I knew I'd just lose that person all over again?" she asked, prodding at her own wound. "It took me five years to get over it. I don't know if I'd survive a second time."

"There are no guarantees in life. There's no such thing as a happy ending for anyone in Spira right now." The hand on her shoulder tightened. "But you would survive." His tone was firm, rather than patronizing; he said it as though he was stating a simple fact, which left Rikku all the more confused.

"Auron?" she queried, daring to look at him.

"You are strong enough," he reassured her, filling her with hope and dread. Then he let his hand fall from her shoulder and looked away. "It's late," he said.

"Yeah," Rikku agreed. Neither of them moved. She focused on the undamaged portion of the forest before them, letting herself drift off in the peaceful silence. Macalania was a place of memory, not just regret. Dangerous as the waters were here, there was no denying the forest's beauty.

"Braska and Jecht are waiting for us. The longer we delay -"

Rikku rolled her eyes and cut him off. "I know, I know. The more stupid jokes we'll have to put up with from Jecht."

Auron grunted, annoyed, and Rikku giggled.

"I want to stay here a little longer," she said. "I have some thinking to do." To her surprise, Auron only sighed and settled into a more comfortable stance. "Uhh… you don't have to wait up for me, you know," she added.

"Hnn. As if I'd let Jecht dictate my actions. Take as long as you need, I'll wait."

Rikku hid her grin, touched by Auron's concern for her welfare. Even with the beauty of the surrounding forest half-ruined by his own hand, he still managed to charm her into caring about him.

Maybe that was the magic of Macalania. Dangerous as it was, it forced people closer together, if just for a little while. Yuna and Tidus shared their first kiss here, after all. Together they found something to smile about, even when it seemed like there would be nothing but tears left for any of them. Of course, it was all dashed to pieces by the end. But eventually, Yuna smiled again, and more sincerely than ever before. It took awhile, but she survived. Tidus' return to Spira had been the proverbial icing on her cake; Yuna would have been capable of moving on whether he returned or not.

Auron stirred, and Rikku glanced at him from the corner of her eye. She felt a bit jealous, wishing she could siphon off her cousin's strength and just forget about the man who stood at her side.

Maybe that was why Shiva made this beautiful, artificial forest. To remind us to keep dreaming of better things. Looking at Auron, Rikku wondered how strong she was. "So are we friends again?" she asked him.

Auron's lips twisted into a tiny smirk. "We were friends?" But there was no malice in his voice. And was that - ? Rikku peered, wondering if her eyes were playing tricks on her. It looked almost as though his expression was melting into a genuine smile. Did she even want to hope for that much?

"We should return to the camp," Auron told her gruffly. He offered her a hand, and Rikku hesitated. She slipped her palm into his, and his fingers wrapped around her and tightened. Then she was being pulled to her feet and fighting to control the broad grin on her face.

This is gonna hurt like hell.

.x.x.x.

When Rikku woke the next morning, the first sight that greeted her was Jecht, playing with the recording sphere she'd given him. She shot out of her bedroll with a jolt of surprise; the sun hadn't yet risen. But if Jecht was already up that still meant she was late.

"Why didn't you guys wake me up?" she squeaked, bundling together her things in a haphazard rush.

"Ah, relax, will ya?" Jecht told her, playing with the controls on the sphere, a look of intense concentration on his face. "Braska and Auron are scopin' out the place for fiends. Red told me not to wake ya."

"Huh?" Rikku said, gaping. "Are you talking about the same Auron I know?"

Jecht only smirked at her. "Yep. Guess he took one look at you and decided you needed all the beauty sleep you could get."

"Jecht!" Rikku screeched. Then she groaned and grabbed her head. "It's too early to wake up to you in the morning."

"Relax, I'm just foolin' ya," Jecht said, a trifle too contrite to be sincere. "Besides, you can stop actin' so surprised, Blondie. I already said he's got a thing for you."

"No, he doesn't!" Rikku yelped, feeling her face turn bright red.

Jecht paused to smirk at her. "That so? Then why d'ya look like you just been caught with your hand in the cookie jar, huh?"

Rikku slapped her palms to her cheeks and glared at him. "No hands have been in anyone's cookie jars, Jecht!"

"Not even your own?" Jecht gave her a pitying look. "Man, no wonder you're so bent outta shape."

Rikku's mouth opened and closed a few times. "I'm… just gonna pretend you didn't say that for my own sanity."

"I'm just sayin' -- "

" -- and my supply of bullets," she added meaningfully, but Jecht only smirked. "No really! How can you think that? We're always fighting and stuff!"

"Foreplay," Jecht replied, still fiddling with the sphere. He was interrupted by the tightly bundled sack of bedding that Rikku sent hurling towards his head, knocking him over. "Shit!" he yelled, nearly fumbling the sphere. "What the hell do you think you're doin'? I almost dropped it!"

"You -- you -- shaved ogre! I don't know how you managed to convince your wife to marry you, 'cause it sure wasn't for your personality!" Rikku sputtered, wishing she had a spare grenade on hand.

" 'Course not! Everybody knows the women love me for my body," Jecht boasted, lifting his arm and kissing his bicep. He grinned as Rikku seethed at him. "Sorry babe, but you're gonna have to settle for the Stiff. This specimen's spoken for."

"Augh! You're so full of yourself!" Rikku yelled, searching for another projectile to lob. "I'm gonna wipe that smirk off your face with... this... ahh... this stick!" She grabbed her last-minute weapon and brandished it menacingly. The mission to maim Jecht was waylaid by crunching sounds coming from the direction of the forest; Auron broke back into the camp, with Braska trailing behind him. He shook the excess crystal shards off of his boots and looked at them, not at all surprised to catch Rikku chasing after Jecht with a stick.

"Good, you're finally awake," he observed. "Do I want to know why you two are getting along so well this morning?"

Rikku might have believed in Auron's ill humor had he not bothered to let her sleep in. As it was, she beamed and tried to figure out how to casually dispose of her stick so she could approach him. She felt giddy and nervous, and wondered if she should act nonchalant, as though nothing had changed, or bubbly and cute to try and catch his eye. So great was her dilemma that she almost missed Jecht's next words.

Never one to pass up an opportunity to needle his favorite target, Jecht opened with a promising parlay. "Well, I was just tellin' Blondie here how you got the hots for -- "

The stick problem relieved itself quite readily when Rikku chucked it at Jecht's head, forcing him to duck before he could finish the sentence. She turned to Auron, sure that her face was flaming red, and fumbled for words as he lifted a bemused eyebrow.

"Jecht and I were just talking about how hot you are!" she blurted out. Then she winced.

"What?" Now it was Jecht's turn to yell in chagrin, and that was almost worth her embarrassment.

Auron's lips quirked, but it disappeared, only to be replaced by a disturbed expression. "Is that so," he deadpanned, turning to glare at Jecht.

" 'ey! I don't swing that way!" Jecht protested.

"Pity," Auron grunted, and Rikku's jaw dropped. Jecht was even more shocked; he lost a few shades of tan on the spot. Recovering when Braska began to laugh, he stomped over to the smoldering fire pit to fiddle with his sphere in a sullen funk.

"Auron!" Braska said, joining them. "Did you just make another joke? You had better be careful or it may become a habit."

Auron shrugged, his eyes lightening with a mild spark of amusement. "The ability to offend Jecht can make almost any indignity bearable," he replied. "Besides..." Then he turned and looked at Rikku. "It isn't necessary to be honest all of the time."

Rikku gave Auron a weak smile, one which didn't go unnoticed by Braska. Then, she heard a familiar hum and a click and spun around to look at Jecht. He was still playing with the sphere's controls; it was glowing in his hands. "What do you think you're doing with that thing anyway?"

Jecht looked up at them. "Well, you said these things were like cameras, didn'tcha?" He pressed another button on the sphere and it began to record.

"What are you taking?" Auron tensed, scowling at Jecht as the sphere centered on him.

"Well, you said it was gonna be a long trip. We'll be seeing lotsa of neat things, right? So I thought I'd record it all in this. To show to my wife and kid, you know." He tilted the sphere and gestured at Auron. "Well don't just stand there like a Stiff. Move or talk or somethin'!"

Auron snorted. "You nearly died yesterday. This is no pleasure cruise!"

Jecht only rolled his eyes in response. "I'm still here. Besides, the fans go crazy for blood!"

"Impossible," Auron muttered, stalking off towards the forest. "Fetch me when he's done acting like a spoiled child."

After Auron left, Braska frowned at Jecht. "Auron doesn't like being filmed. Perhaps you should acquire a different target next time."

"I got one already!" Jecht answered, lifting the sphere to his eye and squinting through it. "Hey, Braska. Ain't this whole Pilgrimage thing supposed to be a grand occasion? Where're the cheering fans? The crying women?"

At this Rikku stomped her foot on the ground. "What am I, chopped liver?"

"You don't count," Jecht answered.

"Hey!"

"Besides, in your case it's more like whinin' than cryin'," he observed.

"HE-EY BUSTER!" Rikku formed a fist, fully intending to show Jecht just how big of a fan she could be. She stopped at the sound of Braska's quiet voice, low and serious.

"This is it." Braska folded his hands together. "Too many goodbyes - people think twice about leaving." His face betrayed nothing, but thoughts of Yuna hung in the air between them.

"Hmm..." Jecht said. "If you say so." Then he frowned at the oppressive silence that drifted around Rikku and Braska. "Well, it better be a lot more colorful when we come back. A parade for Braska, vanquisher of Sin!"

Rikku winced; it was easy to forget that Jecht didn't know the truth. She wondered what they would tell him when he discovered it for himself. The enormity of their lie made her own spat with Auron seem inconsequential by comparison. She glanced at Braska; having made the same mistake with Tidus, Rikku believed in breaking bad news to others sooner rather than later.

Braska met her eyes and shook his head minutely. So he didn't want it to be known, then. He was just like Yuna, in so many ways it made her ache. He smiled at Jecht, and she marvelled that there wasn't even a hint of bitterness in his tone.

"We should go. The day grows no younger. Gather your things and follow when you're ready, I will find Auron." He left and Rikku sank to the ground, feeling defeated. She looked up when she heard Jecht shut the sphere off. He was eyeing her.

"Am I missin' somethin' here?" he asked, glancing after Braska. "Level with me, Blondie. What are those two hidin' anyway?"

Rikku was at a complete loss for words, feeling a sick sense of déjà-vu. She didn't have the heart to tell Jecht the truth; she couldn't do it any more than she could to Auron. Jecht was still too new to Spira, too full of piss and vinegar and most importantly hope. "They'll tell you when they're ready."

Jecht glowered at her. "I thought you were different from them," he said, the accusation written across his face. "Guess I thought wrong. I'm just another crazy old fool to you too, ain't I. Thanks a lot."

"Hey, I trust you!" Rikku protested.

"Nice way you got of showin' it," Jecht replied, rolling to his feet and grabbing his sword.

Rikku kicked at the ground, angry at herself for disappointing him. "Jecht!" She chased after him. "Hey, wait up!"

"Why? You got somethin' you wanna say to me?"

Rikku nodded. "I... I can't tell you because it's Braska's decision. Please... you have to understand that, Jecht. He's the Summoner, he's the one you have to ask."

"Sure," Jecht sneered at her as they caught up with the others. He passed Auron and tossed a familiar-looking white jug towards the other man.

Auron snatched it out of the air and shook it. Then he looked at Jecht in shock. "This is empty," he noted.

"So?"

"It was almost full last night," Auron pointed out.

Jecht stopped and looked at him, his face schooled into a careless frown. "Well excuse me for bein' thirsty. Maybe I'll save you some next time."

Auron fixed the jug to his belt. "If this is how you normally drink, there won't be a next time." Jecht only shrugged at him and continued his moody tramp through the forest. Auron lingered and waited until Rikku caught up with him. "Is there a reason for Jecht's behavior this morning?" he asked her under his breath.

Rikku sighed and nodded. "He wanted to know what will happen after we defeat Sin."

Auron narrowed his eyes at Jecht's back. "It is... more difficult that I thought it would be," he mused.

"Trying not to tell him?" Rikku asked.

"Trying to tell him," Auron corrected her.

Rikku nodded. "Because he's growing on you," she supplied. Auron grunted, a look of distaste splashing across his face, and Rikku giggled. Then she sobered and looked at Jecht again. "Braska doesn't want us to tell him, you know. But Jecht knows something's up. He's gonna totally blow a gasket when he finds out."

"Braska's decision is unwise. Problems like these only fester if left unattended." Auron frowned. "But if that is what he wants, then I will speak with Jecht. He should learn how to handle his sword; maybe it will be enough of a distraction." He began to move forward, but Rikku caught his arm and held him back.

"Lemmie talk with him first. I need to settle something before you beat him up."

Auron peered at her, but nodded. She sprinted down the path and slowed by Jecht's side. He gave her a cursory glance and continued walking, not bothering with a greeting. Rikku clasped her hands behind her back. "Hey."

"So, are you gonna talk yet or what?" Jecht asked her.

Rikku nibbled her lip. Maybe she didn't have to tell him anything. "You know, that sphere you just made," she said, and felt Jecht's eyes on her. "You should leave it behind."

"Huh?" Jecht fished the sphere out of his pocket and looked at it. "I thought you said these things were expensive! Now you want me to just throw it away?"

Rikku nodded at him. "You made that for Tidus, didn't you? If you want him to find it, you should leave it here." Now she knew she had his full attention.

"What do you know about my boy?" he asked her suspiciously. "You sure you ain't from Zanarkand? I never saw you around the house..." Then he blanched. "You... you ain't one of them celebrity stalkers, are ya?"

Rikku rolled her eyes. "Trust me, if I wanted to stalk celebrities, I would've picked one." She dropped her head. "I am different from them, you know," she whispered, tilting her chin at Auron and Braska. "I know things they don't. Stuff about you... stuff about Sin. And," she added, cutting him off as he opened his mouth. "I can't tell you, either. But it's enough that you at least know. Because I trust you. And I know you're not a joke, Jecht."

Jecht shook his head. "Why?" he asked her. "I thought this was supposed to be some damn dangerous trip. Why not just tell 'em what you know? Wouldn't it make things easier?"

"Sometimes," Rikku said carefully, "keeping things quiet is the only way we have to protect our friends. So... don't get so mad at Braska and Auron, okay? They're just looking out for you."

Jecht looked unconvinced. He did relax enough, however, to cross his arms behind his head. "I'm gonna find out, ya know," he assured her. "Sooner or later, I'm gonna figure out Braska's big secret whether you want me to or not."

Rikku nodded. "That's your right. Just don't worry so much about it for now."

Jecht slid his eyes over towards her. "I'm gonna find out your secret, too," he added. "How you know about my boy, why no one else believes in my Zanarkand." He tossed the sphere he was carrying into the air. "But for now, just tell me why I gotta ditch this thing."

"This is a forest of dreams," Rikku replied. "If you try hard enough, I'm sure your dreams will reach Tidus here. He's your son, so he'll find them one day." She smiled at Jecht and shook her head at his puzzled expression. "You don't have to if you don't want to. But I think the least you could do is trust me back."

Jecht fell silent, pacing at her side through the glittering forest. Eventually, Rikku tired of his company and scampered ahead down the path. Auron passed him and mumbled something about training, but Jecht waved him off, preferring instead to study the sphere in hands. Finally, with a sigh, he shook his head. "I must be crazy," he said out loud. Then, drawing his hand back, he threw the sphere as far as he could into the dense forest. A small plip sounded as it landed in one of the many pools of crystalline water, and he imagined it sinking to the bottom.

"I hope I find you before you ever find that, boy," Jecht muttered, then rejoined Braska's side.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

13: Reflections

It wasn't cold, Rikku decided. It was damn cold. Shivering, she pulled the thin brown cloak around her shoulders and squinted against the light that bounced across the snow.

"I'm freezin' my balls off!" Jecht muttered, huddling next to her. The wind was much too harsh to risk baring her tender gums to its cutting bite; instead, Rikku settled on scowling at him from under the lip of her collar. Even Braska looked uncomfortable, hugging his arms around himself against the bitter cold. Auron alone seemed comfortable in the chilly weather; it may have been the layers of clothing he deemed necessary to wear, or perhaps it was pride that kept him stiff.

Or maybe his face froze into that scowl, Rikku thought, jealous of the thick coat that covered both of Auron's arms. Al Bhed and snow definitely did not mix. She was half-tempted to tap into the power of her garment grid; one of her outfits might afford her more protection than the flimsy miniskirt and thin cloak which she clutched to her throat. The disastrous result of her last experiment with the garment grid was enough motivation to dissuade her, though.

The wind howled, and a few crystals of ice fell off of Rikku's braids. Barely, she amended, fingering her belt. Still weighing the disadvantage of irritating her companions against the benefit of not having to amputate frostbitten appendages, Rikku didn't notice when their small procession stopped. She pitched into Jecht and they both nearly fell into the snow.

"Oww! Watch it!" Jecht wasn't much better off than she; he had ripped his own cloak apart to cobble together makeshift moccasins for his bare feet, and as a result the remaining fabric was much too short to keep him warm. In a feeble attempt to stretch what little clothing he did wear, Jecht had slung the straps of his overalls over his chest. It made his appearance even more similar to his son than before, and as he swore and stumbled at their collision, Rikku was much too cold and tired to think about the apology that came tumbling out of her mouth.

"Oh, sorry, Tidus."

She didn't notice when Jecht froze and stared at her; she completely missed the dawning look of suspicion and disbelief on his face, which hardened quickly into determination. Nor did she realize her mistake when Auron called them to gather around and pointed out the small travel agency by the side of the path. She was too busy marvelling over the fact that it was Auron who stopped first. By the time her sluggish brain caught up with her mouth, they were ensconced within the warm building and Jecht appeared unaffected by her slip, busy warming his feet at the table nearest to the fireplace. Shrugging to herself, Rikku slipped out of her dampening cloak and joined Auron and Braska at the clerk's desk.

"We rest here," Auron told them. Braska nodded in agreement, his face pinched and weary from the long hike.

"That will be 650 gil," the desk clerk said officiously, frowning at Rikku. The Agency had yet to fall into Rin's hands, let alone O'aka's - it was actually more of a Summoner's way station than a shop, at the present time, one that was being run out of the Church of Yevon's own pockets. It showed; as the sneering clerk quoted his price, Rikku realized a moment too late that unmasking her shock of blonde hair and green eyes was not the wisest of manoeuvers. The price was exorbitant, and she opened her mouth to protest.

The stern glance Auron shot at her did little to quell her anger, but the weary slump of Braska's shoulders lodged the complaint in her throat. She shut her mouth and backed away from the countertop, realizing that the high price was, in some regard, her fault. A flush deeper than that brought about by the cold stained her cheeks; she wondered what Auron would have to say to her once they were in private. Seating herself by Jecht at the table instead, she tried to warm up.

"They better sell some goddamn shoes here," Jecht mumbled, inspecting one of his toenails. The instant they had entered an area with something more than sub-freezing temperatures, Jecht's makeshift shoes came off. The skin on the bottom of his feet was scarred and calloused; Rikku wondered if he could feel anything through his soles at all.

"I don't think we'll have a lot of money left after tonight to buy shoes, let alone anything else," she said in a small voice.

"Great. Didn't really need those toes anyway," Jecht answered, his humor only mildly improved by the change in environment. He pulled a face as he heard Auron's voice lift enough to reach them. The shopkeeper was gesturing at their table, and Auron's expression was frostier than the weather outside. Her ears burned as she figured out what they were arguing about, and she pulled the hood of her damp cloak up over her braids.

"Don't worry so much about it," she heard Jecht say gruffly. He pulled the hood away from her. "Big red and ugly won't let 'em turn you out."

Rikku felt a rush of appreciation for Jecht's words and snuck another glance at the counter. Braska was speaking now, trying to placate the clerk while Auron stood to his side like a slab of granite. An intimidating, sword-wielding slab of granite. It was comforting to know that the reason for his behavior was her own safety. Well, and Jecht's safety too, if she wanted to be honest; then again, as she watched Jecht contort to pick between his toes, she preferred to think she was the deciding factor in the equation.

Auron's always protecting me, Rikku thought with another twinge of warmth. The last time she visited Macalania on a Pilgrimage, it had been just as cold. When Brother attacked, Auron stood between them. The iron in his calm voice had bolstered her, allowing her to find the strength to stand up against her people. Afterwards, his curt demand for assistance with the machina had shielded her against Wakka's heated words.

It was then that her crush started, Rikku realized. He had been silent as they rode together towards the temple. She'd wrapped her arms around his waist and cowered behind his bulk to shield herself from the cutting wind. Even with the thick red coat between them, he'd been tense, just as upset with her as he was with Wakka. It was because her family coordinated the attacks on the Summoners and threatened Yuna's Pilgrimage. The warmth of his strong words against Brother had bled away with the cold breeze; it wasn't until Auron defended her again at the temple, despite his annoyance, that her fascination transformed into something deeper.

He wasn't just guarding Yuna. Both she and Tidus fell under his care, rough as it was; with a slight hitch of disappointment she understood now that it wasn't any sort of sign that he returned her own blossoming feelings. Auron was simply Auron - staunch defender of those who needed protection. Though he would be loathe to admit it, his actions always spoke of a code of honor much louder than his rough words.

The more Rikku thought about it, the more disenchanted she became. Strange, how revisiting Macalania now of all times was shedding new light on one of her most treasured memories. She'd based her obsession with the Legendary Guardian on her gratitude, when he acted as her knight in shining armor. Now, it seemed more and more like Rikku had, once again, overreacted to a much simpler explanation for his behavior - Auron was being himself.

"Maybe I came all this way for nothing..." She shivered. Was all she really had just shadows and impossible girlish fantasies? Rikku looked towards the counter and froze. Auron's stance hadn't shifted, but his eyes were now trained on her. He quirked an eyebrow, as if she was broadcasting her thoughts across her face.

Do I even like him? Rikku asked herself, meeting his stare without any hostility. Am I in love with him, or a reflection of him that I created? She continued to gawk and Auron's eyebrow rose higher, questioning her scrutiny. Rikku grimaced and stuck her tongue out, and Auron's bordering-on-curious look descended into a scowl of disapproval.

Sure, he's hotter now than he ever was when he was... uh, dead, Rikku thought. But he's still the same Auron I remember. He doesn't like me; he protects me. It wasn't enough. Not enough to base her fantasies on, and certainly not enough to justify being trapped in the past, reliving a hell that she had thought was over and done with. She tilted her chin at Auron in dismissal and faced the fire, her mouth pulled into a fierce frown.

"Trouble in paradise?" Jecht chuckled. "Better look out. He's comin' this way!"

Rikku cringed but ignored him, staring stubbornly into the fire even when Auron arrived. Her aloof vigil was harder to keep when he used her own tactics; he leaned closer and the edges of his red overcoat brushed against her arm.

"You have been irritable ever since we entered Lake Macalania," Auron stated. He waited for her response, but Rikku clenched her teeth together. She heard him sigh before continuing. "Rikkma, what is the matter?"

Wondering if he was asking out of concern or duty, Rikku decided she didn't care. This man she was beginning to know would throw himself - in fact already had thrown himself - in front of fiends to save any member of their little entourage, herself included. Now, instead of making her blush with pleasure, the idea of him defending her was annoying - a confirmation that she didn't know Auron as well as she thought she did. Still, it wasn't fair to be taking out her sour temper on this Auron; he couldn't even know what he had "done" to annoy her besides be himself.

"Hnn," she heard him grunt before she could formulate a suitable response. "Sulking like a child because you were careless enough to be recognized by Yevon's faithful. In case you haven't noticed, it's not going to get any easier." The last he delivered with disdainful bite. "Stop worrying. Braska has managed to reach an agreement with our host."

The contrite words Rikku had been thinking of saying were drowned in a rising wave of indignation. "That's not it," she said, narrowing her eyes at Auron. "Overeager Yevonites don't scare me at all. Stop trying to protect me like I'm some little kid!"

Auron stared at her, his face a mask. The slab of granite was reforming. "Fine. Sleep outside, then." He stepped away and seated himself at the table across from Jecht, who glanced between them.

"Whoa, Blondie! Auron was just tryin' to help out there. What's eatin' ya now?"

Rikku drew her knees up and dropped her chin onto them. "Umm... sorry. I guess the cold makes me snappy," she fibbed. "Thanks for talking to the innkeeper for me," she added, peering in Auron's direction.

"Thank you for that overflowing expression of gratitude," Auron replied acidly, not bothering to look up from the small menu he grabbed off the center of the table. Rikku stifled a smile; she'd actually affected Auron with her snub. He had, after all, been working the clerk over for her benefit, and she was being less than grateful for his efforts.

Her eyes settled on the top of his head, travelling along the skin that was, to her, odd-looking - a little too smooth and free of scars. His face was contorted with the faint traces of a scowl that hinted at his own bad temper.

Who is this angry young man sitting here? The telltale traces of annoyance would have been much harder to spot on his older face; the Auron she'd known in the past didn't require acknowledgement of his efforts - he simply acted. His younger self, sullenly perusing the menu, didn't have quite the same measure of self-control or maddening serenity that she was used to seeing.

Hah, when he's pouting like this he kinda reminds me of Gippal, Rikku concluded with a smirk. Then she felt a bit of guilt; there'd been no time to spare a thought for her friend and one-time crush since her trip to the Farplane.

Curious, she began to compare the two men in her head, studying Auron as he flipped a page. Gippal had the bigger ego, even with young Auron's brazen attitude. And it was an attitude; the status of Legendary Guardian allowed people to assume Auron had the right to carry on the way he did. This Auron, by comparison, had no such reputation yet still displayed the same gruff behavior. That was where the similarity ended. Auron had more eyes and less smiles than Gippal. And Auron didn't flirt with everything that moved, unless you counted being threatened by his massive sword as courtship.

Growing aware of her observation, Auron looked up from his menu. He frowned at her and Rikku shrugged. "I'm people watching right now. So it's you or Jecht."

As if to prove her point, Jecht lifted his foot towards his nose and sniffed. "I think my feet actually got cleaner from walkin' through that forest," he told them.

Auron twitched. "Find a new target," he said to Rikku, rising to his feet. "I need to see Braska about our meal." He returned to the counter, menu still in hand.

Rikku watched him go. Well, he's got a better butt than Gippal too. Her quiet giggle died out. Thinking about Gippal, no matter how amusing it was, also brought back thoughts of her home, and what she had lost in returning to the past.

Did I ever give him a real chance? Rikku knew she was uncharitable when it came to Gippal's light-hearted advances; though she had developed a crush on him early on, she knew him well enough to stay away from the risk a playboy would pose to her heart. Now, however, isolated from the possibility of seeing him again, she wondered if that had been wise. The more she understood the flaws in her idealized vision of Auron, the more foolish it seemed to have given up on the could-have-beens. Who was to say Gippal would have hurt her? Rikku stared into the fire, distracted, and let the memory of the sun-washed sands of Bikanel warm her.

.x.x.x.

"Hey, Cid's girl, what're you staring at?" Gippal's teeth flashed in the sun, a stark white against his bronzed skin. There was a daring twinkle in his eyes - and he had both of them still, back then - that Rikku knew spelled trouble; more so if he realized she'd been mooning over him.

"It's Rikku!" she shot back, sticking her lower lip out in a pout. In an unusual rush of bravery, Rikku decided to tell him the truth. "And I was staring at you!"

Gippal balked, taken by surprise at her bold admission, and Rikku awaited his response. A slow, smug grin spread across his face, and he ran a hand through his hair before opening his arms wide. "The goods are right here, babe. All you gotta do is say if you want some."

It was the self-satisfied smirk that killed it, Rikku decided then. "Sorry," she answered back with more confidence than she felt. I won't be another one of your conquests, she wanted to say. But she couldn't, because she could never be honest with Gippal. You never knew when it would come back to haunt you. Gippal was notoriously good at finding ways to embarrass her, and her heart was the one thing she refused to risk for his personal amusement.

So instead, she returned his smirk with one of her own and thumbed her nose at him. "I was just thinking you make an awfully convincing sand monkey with your hair spiked up like that. Monkey boy!"

Had she only imagined his smirk faltering at that statement? Did his eyes lose some of their twinkle? She couldn't have said, because in the next instant his smile was predatory, and he was stalking after her with one of the dirty rags, splattered with machina grease. "Well, if I'm a sand monkey, then you must be a grease monkey!" he yelled as he tackled her.

She screamed in delight, and they wrestled and laughed like the children they were. In a way, she was glad, because the mock-battle that ensued hid the flaming spots that rode high on her cheeks.

.x.x.x.

Rikku shook off the memory as the hairs on the back of her neck rose. Refocusing on her surroundings, she saw Jecht picking at his toes, Braska at the counter, and Auron reseating himself at their table, studying the menu as though it held the secrets of the universe. Rikku's gaze lingered on the latter, her mind still caught up in the hazy dream of desert sands.

Could she love Gippal the way she thought she loved Auron? The two men were polar opposites, with the exception of their missing eye. Auron was moody and brooding, in his element surrounded by cold snow rather than warm sunlight. His skin was as pale as his hair was dark; Rikku was sure she had only seen his teeth when he bared them in a grimace, like a wild animal preparing to bite its prey.

Compared with him, Gippal's easy smile and carefree attitude seemed boyish and immature. Feeling relieved by her conclusion, Rikku let out a tiny sigh. Maybe I could fall in love with Gippal in about 40 years. That's probably how long it would take him to grow up! The thought of Gippal as an old man, posing crazily on one leg and leering at younger women made her giggle.

" 'ey. You've got that weird look on your face again."

Rikku noticed Jecht scrutinizing her. "Weird look?"

"Yeah," Jecht answered. "Y'know, the one that means you can't be thinkin' anything good."

Rikku blinked. Her face really was an open book if even an illiterate like Jecht could read it. "Well, uh..." Maybe honesty was the best policy in this case. "... yeah! You're right! If I tell you all about my nefarious plans, Auron's gonna have to kill us both, and he's already in a bad mood."

Rather than discouraging Jecht as she had hoped, the spark of curiosity took root and turned into a flame. "Naw, see, now you gotta tell."

"Oh, poopie," Rikku muttered under her breath. "Fine. I was thinking about..." She sucked in her breath and stole a glance at Auron, who had looked up from the menu at the sound of his name. The eyebrow was slowly creeping upwards again, but at least he wasn't scowling at her. Yet.

"... older men. I think I'm attracted to older men." Well, it was the truth. She could say it with a straight face and Auron wouldn't be able to accuse her of lying. Technically, she wasn't. And, it conveniently explained why she couldn't convince herself to take her attraction to Gippal seriously. That was a comforting thought. "Yeah, that must be it! I like older men. That's why I can't get along with Gippal." A movement caught her eye; Auron had dropped his menu onto the table. A quick glance to the side showed that Jecht was also staring.

"You like older men?" Jecht said gleefully, his eyes wide as saucers.

"Gippal?" Auron asked.

Rikku felt the blush that had been lurking near the surface explode to her cheeks. I said that out loud? Holy machina, who needs to read my face when I have this motor mouth?

"Nevermind! Forget I said anything!" Rikku squeaked, making a spectacle of fussing with her braids.

The damage was done, and the smile creeping across Jecht's face could have rivalled one of Gippal's any day. "How much older?" he asked. " 'Cause the way you were starin' at Auron back there makes me think you're lyin'..."

If it was possible to rupture blood vessels with a blush, Rikku was sure she would be dying of internal bleeding. "How do you know I wasn't staring at Braska, huh?" she asked, crossing her arms and deliberately looking away from Auron.

"Were you?" Auron's voice was serious, and despite Jecht's snigger Rikku couldn't keep her eyes from flying to Auron's face. Was he - no, he couldn't be - Auron didn't get jealous. Not in any universe. But he did look like he was ready to murder something. Most likely her, if she didn't answer him soon.

"Ewww, no way!" Rikku blurted out. "That's gross, we're practically family!"

Deadly silence settled over the table. At least, Rikku wished it was deadly. Because then, she would actually die, and not have to live through the storm that she knew was about to break.

"What?" Auron bellowed, all pretences of the menu forgotten. Rikku's eyes widened and she tried to shush him, glancing over to the counter where both Braska and the clerk were now looking at them. The only person who remained calm and collected was Jecht; he was staring at her from half-closed eyes. For a fleeting moment, Rikku wondering what was going through the burly man's head. It was almost as though he was trying to make her drop her guard and slip up…

"Explain yourself!" Auron hissed at her, his eyes boring angry holes into her head. He was incensed at the unearthing of yet another one of her secrets. Rikku felt her skin go clammy as Braska approached their table. Would he say anything? Would Jecht say anything?

"Well," Braska said as he seated himself, oblivious to the tense conversation. "It took some convincing, but he agreed to take us in and serve us dinner for a reasonable price." His eyes drifted over them, lingering on Rikku's suddenly-pale face. "Is something wrong?"

Rikku opened her mouth, her mind still turning like a chocobo in a wheel as she tried to come up with a viable excuse. Her relief when Jecht interrupted was short lived.

"Rikkma was just sayin' somethin' real interesting here," Jecht offered, smirking at her.

Rikku stared at Jecht with silent horror, pleading with her eyes to keep his big mouth shut. Or at least hypnotise him into silence; these swirls have to be good for something!

"Oh really?" Braska paused to relieve the clerk of the tankards of ale and plates of steaming soup brought to their table, handing them out to the others. "What was it?"

Rikku looked down into her bowl of clear broth, watching the blobs of grease float across its surface. She swallowed back her nausea and attempted to answer. "I - I... um, well, I -"

"She likes older men," Jecht supplied, picking up his spoon and scooping some soup into his mouth.

Rikku thought she would collapse with relief. It was temporary as she wrestled with the new dilemma that arose: why did Jecht make that save? Was it because of that slip-up I made calling him Tidus earlier? Is he angling for something? She looked at Jecht and narrowed her eyes. What's his game?

He swallowed, then gave Rikku a wink. "Auron ain't takin' it too well." And now you owe me, his mean grin seemed to say to her.

"Oh," Braska said, sparing a careful glance at Auron. A brief twist of amusement crossed his face. "Even if we are all friends here, it may be for the best if you refrain from telling us all of your preferences, Rikkma." He gave her a weary smile and picked up his spoon, and Rikku felt another wave of guilt for adding once again to Braska's problems. Strong-willed he might be, but Braska was far from accustomed to the hard travel which the Pilgrimage demanded. His face was pale and she tried not to notice how his hand shook as he ate.

Humbled into silence, Rikku dedicated herself to the task of eating the thin, greasy soup. It was too much to hope the dinner would continue that way; after a few moments, Auron dropped his spoon with a clatter.

"Rikkma," he said. "Why did you say that?"

"Hmm?" Braska paused, spoon halfway to his mouth.

Rikku laughed nervously. "Oh, you know," she fumbled, giving Auron a tight grin. "I was just pointing out how all Al Bhed are kinda related. You know us gear-heads - same hair, same eyes… we might as well all be a part of the same big family, right?"

Auron narrowed his eyes but said nothing. Braska, however, lowered his spoon and gave Rikku a hard look.

"I thought we had finished this discussion in Bevelle," he said, his voice a little too calm for Rikku's liking.

"Huh? Oh…" Shoot. She'd forgotten about Braska's stern warning the last time she'd tried to lump the Al Bhed together under one ill-fitting umbrella. "... sorry about that. I was just joking!"

Braska's hand clenched around his spoon. "I will not have you, or anyone else making such jokes in poor taste. If you cannot respect yourself, then the least you might do is show a little for my daughter and my late wife."

"Yes, my lord," Rikku said lowly, and the tense meal resumed in silence, punctuated only by the clack of spoons against the clay bowls. She hunched over her soup, masking her scowl. What a mess, she fumed, sneaking a glare at Jecht. Owe him? Yeah, right! She turned her gaze to Auron and choked on her soup.

He'd already finished eating and was resting his elbows on their table, hands folded in front of his face. He observed her closely, willing to delay pressing her on the latest revelation for Braska's sake. But, from the look on his face, not for long.

Finishing his meal, Braska pushed away from the table. "My apologies, but I am exhausted. I think I shall call it a day."

Auron stood to assist him, pausing only to lean towards Rikku. The warm rush of his breath, soured by the soup, blew into her ear. "A word before you retire," was all he said.

Rikku gulped. She swirled the remains of her meal, trying to draw it out until they were gone. Jecht cleared his throat, and Rikku started. If she stayed at the table, she would be alone with him instead - and Jecht already looked like he was planning on grilling her. Interrogation by sword or blitzball, she thought with a frustrated sigh. Groaning in defeat, Rikku excused herself and trailed after Auron.

"That one is yours, Rikkma," Braska said, pointing at one of the doors further down the hallway. "If you'll excuse me..."

"Oh! Yeah, thanks," Rikku said, distracted by Auron's scrutiny. Their silent staring contest was broken by Jecht's cough as he ambled into the room after Braska.

"We won't wait up for you," he smirked.

Auron turned his mouth down into a disapproving frown, but not even Jecht's humor could throw him off his target. Rikku squirmed.

"You're really giving him the wrong idea," she said when they were alone in the hall. Her attempt to distract Auron failed miserably. He grabbed her by the elbow and escorted her to her door.

"You are related to Braska?" he asked. His gaze was probing, but no longer angry. It was, however, stern. There would be no wriggling out of answers this evening. Not that she wouldn't try, though.

"I'm not! Not really," she said. "Not like that."

"Then why did you say it?" Auron pressed. Rikku remained silent, and she wondered if he was going to explode at her. To her surprise, he only leaned in closer. He was massive; Auron had just as much muscle as Jecht, he simply kept it hidden under his heavy robes and thick armor. "Tell me the truth, Rikku," he demanded. Her name rolled off of his lips like velvet brushing across her skin.

Rikku closed her eyes, trying to understand herself and the swell of emotions that rose when he said her name. It was a crime; it was her name. No one should have the right to say it like that; didn't he know he was stripping her of ownership just by pronouncing it in that voice of his?

"Rikku," he said again, this time with a touch of impatience. He caught her chin as she tried to twist away from him.

Warm, she thought of his unexpected touch. "I'm not related to Braska," she said, not daring to open her eyes. She tried to will away the fluttering in her belly.

Gippal never said her name like that; he spoke with sunlight and laughter. Auron murmured it like a dark secret that was threatening to swallow her whole. If I'm not in love with him, her thoughts whispered, then why do I tremble when he says my name? She would blame it on the cold, if his fingers weren't burning her so. To her relief, Auron's hand dropped away from her face, but even with her eyes closed she could feel his gaze. She knew he was waiting for the other shoe to drop.

"I'm related to Raenn," she said, so softly that it could have been mistaken for a breath, had he not been leaning in. Air brushed across her face, and then the warmth of his presence was gone. Daring to open her eyes a crack, she sighed in relief - or was it dismay - at what she saw.

"So that is who you lost…" Auron trailed off, his face distant as he processed the new information.

Rikku winced. Well… she supposed his assumption that she was broken up over Raenn's death was better than admitting she was torn because he looked uncannily like her dead non-boyfriend. She watched Auron struggle to come to terms with her latest surprise; his face looked much the same way it had when he'd discovered her connection to Brother.

He's the same person, in many ways. Scarred or not, the man before her still held an undeniable power over her heart. It was certainly hammering loud enough in her ears to be in agreement with that conclusion. Maybe, she thought to herself with a brief glimmer of hope, it doesn't matter who I thought he was, just who he is now.

True to form, Auron turned on her with a fierce scowl. "Don't think I will let this affect the Pilgrimage," were his first words to her, and she smiled at his predictability. The smile faltered as he continued to look at her; he wasn't mad. Well okay, he was mad, but not I'm-kicking-you-out-of-the-party mad, just Rikku's-gone-and-done-it-again mad. There was a hint of something beneath the surface, a struggle boiling within him.

He didn't ask how I'm related to Raenn. Even after his disgrace from Yevon, Auron still couldn't put down the animosity he felt for Cid, leader of the Al Bhed people. But it was looking more and more like it had to do with Braska's exile, rather than Yevon's doctrines. He didn't want to know how she was related to Raenn, she understood; he didn't want to hate her the way she was sure he hated Cid, the source of all Braska's hardships.

Rikku flushed; equal parts of shame and pride mixed within her. Auron was disengaging her, making the decision to keep her secrets easier, she knew, but part of her swelled in anger. Coward, she wanted to rail at him, even though she wasn't any braver. Hadn't she run from Gippal, his arms outstretched? But that was different, Rikku told herself stubbornly, ignoring the small voice in the back of her head that kept asking how? Instead she focused on Auron, who was about to leave.

"Auron..." she whispered, and he paused. Don't run away from this. Don't run away from who I am! No words came out, however, and he filled the silence for her.

"Get some rest, Rikkma." He turned and walked away.

The name left her feeling cold and alone, bereft of the warmth she felt earlier. It wasn't her name; it was the name of a stranger. Rikku guessed the Auron she remembered would never have ended the conversation where he did; the Auron she knew didn't shirk any truth, no matter how unpleasant.

The door shut behind him, leaving Rikku alone in the hallway with her own muddled feelings. She wasn't in love with the legend anymore, she was fairly sure. But no matter how she tried, she couldn't ignore the complicated man who would die protecting any of them, but still ran from himself.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

14: Fiend Filching

Morning dawned over Lake Macalania with a clarity that could only be the result of breath-takingly cold weather. No one in the Summoner's entourage was happy to greet it; Braska was still exhausted from the journey through the forest, Jecht hadn't managed to find himself any more clothing, and Auron was avoiding Rikku.

Rikku herself wasn't feeling very energetic, although that was because she spent the first half of the night tossing and turning, replaying the previous evening's conversation over and over again. After giving up on sleep as a lost cause, she dedicated the rest of her night to pilfering a few 'rightly earned' supplies from the agency storerooms - she was certain Braska's bartering skills weren't up to snuff. The remaining long hours of the morning were spent sewing Jecht a better pair of moccasins with her newfound supplies.

At least something productive came out of last night, Rikku thought blearily, tucking her cloak under her chin. Jecht seemed less than thankful for her efforts.

"Did you have to make 'em pink?" he asked, annoyed as he pulled the slippers on.

"Nobody's gonna see them in all that snow anyway, so stop complaining!" She was quite proud of the large pink moogle pom-poms she'd worked into the design. Revenge was a dish best served as fuzzy and emasculating as possible.

"Rikkma, Jecht," Braska called from the door. "It is time."

With sighs, they both exited into the bitter cold. A quick look around showed Auron far ahead, clearing a path through the snow. They made their way to the crest of a hill; Rikku paused at the apex, gaping at the snow-encrusted canyon they would have to pass.

The path stretched endlessly before them; she didn't remember the hike to the temple being that long. Then again, the last time she had travelled to Macalania Temple, they'd arrived by machina and left under Guado duress. Now, with no distractions to interrupt the journey, there was nothing but snow, snow, and more snow. Rikku let out a loud sigh which crystallized into the frozen air before setting out.

A few hours later, she had a runny nose, numb fingers and a healthy respect for Wakka, who had chosen to walk the entire way in nothing more than his sandals. On the plus side, Jecht stopped complaining about his custom footwear fifteen minutes into the journey, and now even appeared to be thankful for the fuzzy pink poufs that covered his ankles. Poorly dressed as he was, he was holding up better than Braska, whose pace gradually slowed until he was walking alongside of her, bringing up the rear of their small party.

Rikku tried to study Braska unnoticed, slowing her pace to match his. His shoulders were hunched underneath his long robes, and though his breathing was labored his cheeks were white as marble. She snuck a glance forward, considering whether or not Auron would listen if she requested a short stop. As she sucked in her breath to shout, however, Braska addressed her.

"Rikkma," he said, "please don't call out to the others."

Rikku shut her mouth and faced Braska. "Don't you wanna stop?" she asked. "You don't look too good, you know. I mean, you're starting to blend in with the snow there."

Braska shook his head, a smile flitting across his face. "No... I can't rest. This is not even the most difficult leg of our travels. If I do not have the strength to overcome a challenge this simple, then what of the rest of our journey?"

"Hey, it's not like we're in a hurry or anything!" Rikku answered. "Who says you have to make it to the temple all in one go?" Their eyes flickered to the front of the group, landing on the back of Auron's red coat. "Umm, besides him," she amended. "Auron doesn't count, he's, like, made for pain!"

Braska chuckled, though it died out in a series of dry coughs. When he could speak again, he regarded her solemnly. "Pain is a part of life in Spira. I find it wondrous that Jecht is free of that burden." His eyes grew unfocused. "I wish to spread that freedom to all people. I can't allow myself to rest for anything until I've accomplished that goal - especially not for my own weaknesses."

Rikku fingered the edges of her cloak. "About that, Braska... don't you think you should say something to Jecht?" She cleared her throat, trying to swallow the lump that had risen in it. "He deserves to know the truth."

They trudged together through the snow for a few moments in silence, before Braska spoke again. "I... know it's selfish," he began. "But I want to enjoy Jecht's happiness. He is different from anyone else I have met. He doesn't expect things of me. He does not expect me to -"

"Don't say it!" Rikku cut him off. "You don't have to say it out loud. It's bad enough knowing it's gonna happen anyway."

Braska regarded her with a smile. "Thank you for believing in me," he told her. "Your words give me more strength than you know."

Rikku bit down on the urge to yell at Braska for his gratitude. Why are you thanking me for telling you I know you're gonna die? It wasn't so much belief as a slowly-building sense of dread, though she could hardly tell him that. He looked much too tired to weather another argument from her, however, so she kept her lips pressed together. Another silence fell between them, this one uncomfortable. He's too much like Yuna. "It's gonna turn into one big mess when Jecht finds out."

"I know," Braska agreed. He seemed smaller and more frail than ever; Rikku felt her heart constrict with sympathy. She reached out and grabbed his hand, trying to give him what little comfort she could. Braska looked up, surprised, before his features melted into a grateful smile and he squeezed her hand in return. His fingers were blocks of ice against her own, and Rikku frowned.

"Are you really positively sure you don't wanna stop?" she asked, cupping both hands around Braska's own and trying to rub some warmth into him. "I could start a fire or something, you know..." She trailed off as a familiar prickling sensation raced across her neck.

Auron was looking back at them, and his eyes were trained on her. Or, more accurately, they were focused on her hands, which were joined with Braska's. His gaze moved to her face; abruptly he turned and continued his trudge through the canyon. Rikku gulped and released Braska's hand as though she had been burned. To her dismay, the small interchange didn't go unnoticed.

"What happened between you two last night?" Braska asked her, his tone cautious. "Auron is distancing himself from you once again."

Rikku's expression dropped. "Like I know what that big dummy's thinking," she grumbled, kicking at the snow. Her head shot up when Jecht's voice broke through their conversation; he'd slowed down to see what was keeping them.

"Another lover's quarrel, eh? What, ya didn't let him into your room last night?" Jecht crossed his arms. "He's been snappin' at me every time I get close. That man needs to get laid!"

Rikku's face grew hot enough to melt the surrounding snow. "What are you looking at me for?" she screeched, clenching her fists together.

"Jecht," Braska said with the tiny smile that revealed nothing. "Perhaps you shouldn't tease Auron and Rikkma quite so much. I don't think they enjoy your jibes."

"Yeah! Lay off it already!" Rikku added, sticking her tongue out and crossing her eyes for good measure.

"Relax, don't get your panties in a twist," Jecht growled. "I didn't come here to tease ya anyway. I told Auron I thought we should stop an' let you two wusses catch your breath, but he bit my head off."

"I don't need to stop," Braska said, his smile thinning.

Rikku, sensing an opportunity, pounced. "Yeah, well I do." She planted her feet into the snow. "I'm bushed. We should take a vote! Majority rules. And I say we stop right now!"

"Me too," Jecht agreed. By coincidence, of course, he happened to plant himself directly in Braska's path. Taking the cue, Rikku scooted to Jecht's side and also blocked Braska's way forward.

"Very funny," Braska sighed, trying to step around them. Rikku moved to intercept him, and when he tried for the other side, Jecht sidestepped into his path.

"Give it up, we're both faster than you," Jecht said with an air of finality.

Braska studied them for a moment, then shook his head with a smaller but more genuine smile. "Very well. We can rest here for a few moments."

Rikku beamed and Jecht let out a loud whoop before turning and waving at Auron, who was waiting some distance away. "Did ya hear that? We're campin' out here!" he yelled gleefully.

That brought Auron stomping back down the path with a fierce look on his face. Rikku wasn't certain that he wouldn't just pick them up and toss them down the canyon. When he was close enough to speak, he addressed only Braska. "You wish to rest, my lord?"

"That's what he said, so that's what we're gonna do," Rikku piped in before Braska had a chance to reply. "No take-backs! We voted, fair and square!"

"Not exactly fair," Braska murmured with a glint of humor, but he gave Auron the tiniest of nods.

Auron looked as though he wanted to object; a quick glance over both her and Jecht's twin expressions of determination stopped him. Instead, he cast around, searching their surroundings, until he found what he was looking for.

"Over there," he said, pointing at a small shelter under one of the overhanging rocky outcrops.

"Alright! Lunch!" Jecht cheered, grabbing Braska by the arm and pulling him towards their temporary camp. Rikku didn't follow them, instead trying to form some words to say to Auron now that he was finally standing by her side. She cleared her throat. "About last night -"

"You'll need to provide the fire," Auron said, turning away from her. Her eyes followed him as he made his way towards the shelter. With a sigh, she stomped after him. So he thinks he can just ignore me now, huh? Well, he's got another thing coming…

Jecht had already cleared the snow away from the cold rock, and was lining a makeshift fire pit with the precious few scraps of tinder that they'd collected. He opened his mouth and then shut it again and backed away. Rikku couldn't blame him; she pointed at the fire pit with a little more enthusiasm than was strictly necessary. All three men ducked out of the way as the flame sprang to life with a blast. Once the smoke cleared and the hiss of rapidly melting snow died out, she coughed and dared the others to comment. Braska and Jecht decided to busy themselves with preparing a small meal, while Auron edged towards the entrance of the cave. Rikku's head turned, tracking his movement.

"Oh, Auron!" she called out sweetly, her eyebrow twitching. "Where do you think you're going?"

Auron stiffened; he was not one to be cowed even with her temperamental display of magic. He faced her. "That fire will attract fiends. Someone needs to guard our camp." He froze when Rikku leapt to his side, grabbing onto his arm and clutching it.

"Great, I was just thinking that we needed to collect some supplies anyway." She dragged him away from the warmth of the fire, sparing a glance back at a bemused Jecht and significantly more amused-looking Braska. "We'll be back soon," she promised.

As soon as they were clear of the cave, Auron shook her arm off and shot her an irritable glance. "What are you doing?"

"I told you already," Rikku huffed, marching ahead of him. "Hunting for supplies." She heard his annoyed snort, and her frown softened. "I wanted to get you alone. I mean, don't you think we should talk?"

"Hnn," Auron answered, and Rikku had to stop herself from smacking him in frustration.

"Well, I think we should talk," she continued. "Just because I'm related to Raenn doesn't mean anything's changed. Now I know this next one is gonna be hard for you to swallow," she added theatrically, "but I'm Braska's Guardian, just like you."

Auron cleared his throat, his gaze settling on her. Coming to a decision, he canted his head in her direction. "I never doubted it."

Rikku pulled up short, a smile threatening to break over her face. "So we're good?" she asked him.

In response, Auron drew his sword and brandished it at her.

Rikku squeaked and fumbled for her daggers. Just how did I piss him off now?

"Look out!" he growled, and all she had time to think was What? before he dove at her and they went tumbling through the snow. A rush of air and the sound of snapping teeth flew over their heads, and when Rikku looked up, she was staring directly into a large, glassy yellow eye. Naturally, she did the first thing she could think of.

"Rikku!" Auron yelled, pulling her away from the fiend's snapping jaws as it roared in pain.

"Gotcha!" Rikku twisted out of Auron's grasp and tucked away the swirling bottle of pungent musk she had managed to pull out. "Don't kill it yet, I might be able to get another out of him," she instructed, pulling out her daggers as she sized up the angry fiend.

Auron, of course, responded by slashing his sword at the creature, which darted out of the way of his heavy blade. "Hey! I told you not to kiiii... uhh..." she trailed off as the creature's wings folded over its huge eye. Then, a blast of cold air knocked her over and she saw stars.

"Wow!" Rikku yelled, her eyes wide as the landscape swirled in psychedelic colors around her. Is snow supposed to be orange? "I forgot he could do that," she mumbled, readying her daggers. A fuzzy, dark shape swam before her, and Rikku rushed at it, trying to drive her hand underneath its surface. Pyreflies, only pyreflies, she told herself, willing her palm to part the evil eye's leathery skin.

Instead of passing cleanly underneath the surface of the fiend's body, Rikku's hand slapped against a hard, unyielding surface. The blob grunted, and then struck her across the forehead none-too-gently. Pain blossomed over her temples where she was hit, but it did serve to clear the stars from her vision. With a start, Rikku realized that she hadn't been reaching for the fiend at all, but rather Auron. She was, in fact, pressed up close against him, her hand stuck halfway down the front of his coat. The expression on his face could hardly be called pleased.

"Get your hand out of there and hit that thing." He shoved her towards the floating eyeball circling around them.

"Yessir!" Rikku chirped, feeling intoxicated from the sudden close contact. If there was one thing she was thankful for, it was that the little fiend before them wasn't very strong, even if it was too quick for Auron to touch. She concentrated on harnessing her magic - a simple Fira was all it would take - and took aim. The spell flew from her hand, and the fiend was reduced to a rapidly-dissolving collection of pyreflies. Picking through the remains, she pocketed the dropped gil. Auron's presence loomed behind her; she looked over her shoulder and gave him a weak smile. "Umm... hi?" she giggled.

Auron glared at her with a thunderous expression and said nothing.

"Oh, alright," Rikku blurted out, reaching into her pocket with an exasperated sigh. She pulled out the small pouch of gil she had palmed and threw it back to Auron, a pout splashed across her face. "I would've put that to good use, you know."

"On more jewellery, no doubt," Auron said as he tucked his pouch of money away more securely - this time into the waistband of his pants, Rikku saw with a half-disappointed and half-intrigued glance. She made a mental note to reach low the next time she attempted to steal while confused.

"You should have killed the eye immediately."

"No way!" Rikku scrambled to her feet and displayed the items she managed to procure from their victim. "Look at all this stuff! If we're really gonna make it through the rest of this journey, we need a lot more supplies than we have right now. And don't tell me you're gonna buy them with that," she added, sending a significant glance towards Auron's trousers.

Auron frowned, but didn't contradict her. His brow furrowed, however. "And what if it had confused me? That won't be the last evil eye we see, especially if we remain standing here exposed like this."

Rikku's smile dropped and she tapped her chin with a finger. "I got it!" she said. "All you gotta do right now is guard me so I have the chance to steal some stuff. Just worry about blocking whatever the fiends might send my way, okay? And if you get confused or something, hit yourself with your sword! It's perfect!"

Auron stared at her in disbelief. "That's your solution?" he managed to say.

"Well, umm... yeah? What! You're the one wearing the armor," she pointed out. "And it's not like you'd wanna hit little ol' me with that big nasty sword of yours, right?"

Auron regarded her for another long moment before closing his eyes and shaking his head. "Of course." Sarcasm colored his voice. "Though it would be a shame if I were to slip," he added.

Rikku gulped and decided to ignore him; a snow wolf had already poked its head over one of the drifts, attracted by the noise and color of the remaining pyreflies. "No more joking," she said as she flexed her palm and glared at the wolf. Auron faced the fiend, readying his sword. "Uhh..." She spared him a wary glance. "You were joking, right?"

"Hurry up," Auron grumbled as the wolf rushed them.

.x.x.x.

"Wow, I'm all tuckered out," Rikku groaned, trudging through the snow. Auron grunted in silent agreement, quaffing a high-potion that she had managed to snitch from one of the fiends. "It was worth it, though." She patted the now-bulging pouches on her belt. "Thanks a lot," she added as an afterthought; with Auron guarding her, stealing from the fiends was a piece of cake. They made a good team, her quick reflexes complimenting his more carefully planned attacks. The physical exertion of the battles they fought had done much more to break down the barriers than any talk might have, and as they made their way back to the camp, the silence that settled between them wasn't uncomfortable.

"Rikku," Auron said, and while she cheered at his use of her real name, the tone in which he said it prompted her to remain silent. "I apologize for avoiding you earlier."

Rikku blinked. Well, that was unexpected. "Huh," she hummed in surprise, still not certain of what he was trying to say. "I guess I kinda understand. Some of the stuff Cid's done wasn't anything I'm proud of either."

"So... are you Raenn's younger sister?" he asked, stopping to look at her.

Tripping, Rikku caught herself on Auron's conveniently situated back before she could go sprawling into the snow. That at least answered one question - Auron didn't know her family as well as he thought he did. She considered her options - she could lie... and open up the chance for Auron to mention something to Braska, who probably wasn't quite as ignorant of her family tree.

Or, she could tell the truth - a thought which was quickly discarded. If he didn't laugh at her outright, he'd probably be furious, especially if she was endangering Spira's future with her actions. Besides... how was she supposed to tell him that he was going to die and spend the next ten years in a personal purgatory of sorts? That kind of information could put a damper on anyone's outlook, and Auron was already pretty dour to start with.

"Making yourself comfortable?" Auron's dry voice interrupted her mental chatter.

"Oh! Well, yeah, thanks!" Rikku said, releasing her tight grip around his waist.

She decided on obfuscation - it wasn't exactly lying, but it would relieve her of the burden of truth. "I'm not a part of that family anymore," she said, trying to make her voice sound as leaden as possible. It was pretty difficult, considering that she was still basking in the warmth of Auron's presence. A small shiver of guilt plagued her when Auron looked away, buying into her little act. Of course, feeling guilty made acting guilty much more believable, so Rikku decided to wallow for a while longer, avoiding Auron's gaze as they approached the camp.

"I will say nothing," Auron said as the glow of the fire came into view. "But Braska is no fool. You may have to tell him yourself, eventually."

Rikku pursed her lips together; Braska was going to be a bigger problem than he realized. "I'll consider telling him when he starts talking to Jecht," she said. "Until then, Summoner or not, he's got no right to ask."

Auron nodded in agreement. "Very well, Rikkma," he said as they entered the cave. Jecht and Braska looked up from the fire at their entrance, and Rikku forced a bright smile onto her face.

" 'ey, you're back. We were wonderin' what happened to you two," Jecht called out, waving them in. "There's still a little food left, if ya want some."

"Mmm, yeah! But first, we got a little something for you guys, too!" Rikku reached into her pouch and passed a few bottles to each of her companions. "Here, an antidote just in case you step on something nasty, Jecht... oh, and I got some potions for you, Braska!" The men accepted their small bundles with identical expressions of surprise. She noted that Braska's pallor had not improved very much since the beginning of their rest. White magic could heal almost any physical injury, but there was little it could do to combat exhaustion.

Auron also seemed to share her assessment, seating himself on the ground near the fire and reaching for the small bowl of soup Jecht handed to him rather than harassing their companions to clear the camp. Rikku settled uneasily at his side; as she sipped at her soup, she snuck a few worried glances at Braska, wondering what could be done to help him. She ate as slowly as she could, considering her options, but all too soon the soup was finished and Auron was standing up.

"The temple is not too far ahead," he informed them, watching Braska. "If we start now, we may still manage to make it before nightfall." Behind his carefully worded demand, Rikku heard the concern - they had to leave immediately, or risk spending the evening exposed to the elements - something she was sure Braska would weather even worse than the strain of travelling.

Braska nodded in agreement, and once again Rikku found herself wishing that she had some kind of miracle cure to offer him, other than the few high-potions she'd snitched -

"That's it!" she yelled, shooting to her feet. Then she coughed, noticing the stares of the others. "Umm, I mean, can you guys take care of cleaning up the camp while I talk to Braska for a little bit?" She grabbed Braska and pushed him towards the snow. Auron arched an eyebrow at her, but she mouthed a hasty "Trust me!" to him as she ushered the Summoner outside.

"Rikkma?" Braska asked her as soon as they were clear of the others. "What is this about?" He frowned in confusion as Rikku pushed him even farther from the camp; she didn't want to risk Auron or Jecht seeing them, particularly since she wasn't certain she'd be able to control her reactions.

"Guarding you," Rikku answered, dropping her hand to the garment grid. The sphere gate glowed as she activated it, and then, crossing her daggers before her, she allowed the change take over. It was comforting and familiar, as though she was falling into herself, a confident smile threatening to burst from her lips. She heard Braska's sharp intake of breath as the light died away and opened one eye to regard him.

"And to what do I owe the pleasure of that display?" Braska asked, his smile broadening.

Rikku winked at him and flipped a braid over her shoulder, stashing away her machine gun. "You know you love it," she quipped, rooting through her pouches for the potions she had collected earlier. "I had this totally brilliant idea, but I didn't want the others to see me like this. You know Auron, he'd probably flip."

"The last time you wore that outfit, it wasn't Auron who was doing the attacking," Braska observed, still keeping a wary eye on her.

Rikku ignored him. "Alright, so maybe it was me. Still... I don't want Jecht to see me like this either. Just think of all the jokes he'd make!"

"I doubt Jecht would be in the mood to jest while you were pointing your gun at him," Braska replied, though he seemed relieved that the Alchemist dressphere hadn't ruined Rikku's good humor. "I still don't understand what you're doing," he added, watching as she mixed the contents of one vial with another and shook the concoction furiously.

"I'm gonna hit you with something that'll help," Rikku said, holding up the glowing, volatile potion she had mixed together as Braska's eyes widened. "Hold still, you'll feel better in a second!"

"Rikkma, I don't think that's a good idea -" Braska's protest was cut short as Rikku ignored his words and flung the vial at him instead. It shattered with a small pop against his chest, and he began to glow. "What in Yevon's name!" he managed to gasp as the light engulfed his body, flashing once before winking out and leaving his robes dry.

Rikku lowered her hand from where she had raised it to protect her face. "Double high-potion mix," she explained as Braska looked up from his hands, his cheeks flushed with surprise. Already, the color was returning to his face; he straightened and took in his surroundings with renewed vigor.

"Guaranteed to make you feel good, at least for a little while," she told him. "It'll probably wear off before the end of the day, but at least you'll be able to make it to the temple. It's not harmful, trust me," she assured him.

Braska smiled at her, for once holding onto his staff firmly rather than using it as a crutch. "I do feel much better," he admitted. "I wonder how you'll explain this to Auron and Jecht, though. I hardly think they'd approve of you using me as your test subject."

"Hey, it's not a test!" Rikku protested, shouldering her gun. "I've used that mix on myself when I needed a pick-me-up lotsa times!" Glancing back in the direction of the camp, she frowned. "Though, uh, maybe you don't have to tell 'em, right?" She shook her head and returned her gaze to Braska, giving him a confident smile. "Naw... I'm sure Auron can figure me better than that by now. He knows I wouldn't poison you."

The smile on Braska's face faltered, dimming into something less open. "Ah," he said. "Wonderful... I'm glad that you managed to smooth over your differences." Rikku winced; Braska didn't look like he thought it was wonderful. She sensed his uneasiness, but the last thing she needed was to have her uncle become even more interested in her than he already was. Auron might believe that she was Raenn's sister, but if Braska grew curious, he'd be harder to throw him off the scent. Still, she felt guilty about ignoring his feelings - their journey was difficult enough as it was.

"We should get back to the others," Rikku told him, her hand hovering over the garment grid. She stopped, interrupted by a loud chitter that echoed through the snowy field. "... that wasn't you, was it?"

Braska's mouth tightened into a thin line. "Rikkma, turn around. Slowly," he whispered, holding his staff out. "Try not to make any noise."

Rikku never was good at following instructions. She whirled around, fully intending to blast the fiend who interrupted them with her machine gun. Her mouth fell open as she spotted the sleek, gleaming body of the insect that approached from over the hillside, one thought flashing to the forefront of her mind - but this isn't the Monster Arena!

"I've never seen a fiend that large before," Braska said, casting a protective shell over her.

The Espada halted its advance, taking in its prey with beady, intelligent eyes.

Rikku's gun waved; a sheen of sweat broke over her forehead. "We are in deep pickles!"

Footnotes

Abilities used:
Alchemist [Mix]: Vitality - double one ally's max HP

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

15: A Quick Battle

"What in Yevon's name is that thing?" Braska asked between breaths, casting another protective spell over Rikku. The vitality booster was coming in handy; it was lucky that she hit him with it before the creature came into view. The only Espada she'd ever fought before had possessed incredible speed. If this fiend was anything like that one, then she and Braska would need every bit of assistance they could scrounge up.

"It's called an Espada, and..." Rikku squinted at the huge insect, "it's... slower than the one I fought." I guess it's because of all the snow. Still – what was it doing here? She'd always thought the terrible creatures they faced in the Monster Arena were the result of the caretaker's mad breeding techniques. Apparently some of them were natural occurrences. The Espada chittered and advanced.

Rikku swallowed. "Braska... umm, maybe you wanna start summoning? Like, right now?" She edged away from him, figuring two targets were better than one.

Only fuzzy memories remained of her arena battle with the supposedly tame one. She spent most of her time during that fight unconscious, being brought back from the brink of death by phoenix downs. In the end, Kimahri felled the beast with one of his special attacks. The rest of team had already been knocked down by the hellishly quick creature, and the victory felt more like a lucky close call.

This time, there would be no spear-wielding Ronso to save the day if they were knocked out. The only one who could deal any serious damage to the insect's tough shell was Auron, with his armor-piercing sword – but he was much too slow to reach the thing, even if it was hindered by the chill.

Braska chose to forgo his questions and began dancing. The movement aggravated the Espada, which made a gravity-defying leap to land in front of them.

Rikku yelled and fired at the fiend. "Hey, ugly! Your fight's with me!" The Espada swung around, and Rikku's knees buckled. "Uh, yeah!" she said, her voice high with panic. "Braska!" Her words cut off into a shriek as a claw scythed out towards her. "Now would be a good time!" She ducked and scrambled backwards, sending powdery snow flying everywhere.

Braska didn't respond, and the monstrous creature reared before her. Rikku shrunk back in horror.

An earth-shaking roar parted the clouds in a swirl of color. Bahamut swept down from the sky like an arrow. He slammed into the back of the rearing Espada, pinning it down. The noise of their scuffle was deafening.

Braska took no notice of Rikku's return to his side; he was frozen in concentration. They were too close to the battle; a shower of snow blasted over them. In desperation, Rikku stepped in front of Braska. Despite her efforts, the Summoner's concentration wavered, enabling the fiend to score a heavy slash against the dragon.

Freeing itself from Bahamut's grip, the Espada skittered out of range. Its once- smooth shell was marred by jagged slashes where the aeon's claws had injured it. Rikku heard a faint whisper of the Farplane leaking from the wounds.

What? she thought, confused by the hypnotic whistle. I know that sound... Deactivating her dressphere, she returned to her normal outfit.

"The hell is that thing?"

Jecht's shout caught Rikku's attention; he sprinted towards her, sword out. "We leave you alone for two minutes, and this is what you cook up?"

"Shut up! I didn't invite that over for lunch!"

"Watch out!" he shouted.

Rikku spun only to see Bahamut's tail hurtling towards them. The sudden impact sent them flying. She landed face-first in the snow, a good distance away from the fight. Nearby, Braska groaned, signalling the end of his Rapture. Rikku's heart sank as she watched Bahamut's scaled hide turn glossy, dissolving into pyreflies.

Disoriented by the sudden loss of its opponent, the Espada chittered angrily. Taking advantage of the creature's confusion, Auron made his entrance with a forceful blow to its back. Dark blood splattered everywhere as the creature squealed in surprise. Writhing, it searched for the cause of its pain.

"Duck!" Auron couldn't dodge a Death Claw; Rikku dashed forward to distract the Espada. Nothing could stop the fiend's magic attack from slaying its foes if it landed. She aimed for the creature's wounded back, but as she approached, time slowed down.

The whistling in the air grew louder, and through the black ichor spreading across the insect's back, Rikku could make out small flashes of light. Change of plans, she thought as she came closer, closer now, close enough to touch it. Unable to help herself, Rikku reached for its shell, which rippled beneath her fingertips. Her hand delved down into the creature's soul. The sound of the wind was too loud, millions of pyreflies screaming in anguish. She closed her hand around that anguish and pulled –

"Rikkma!" Auron yelled into her ear, and Rikku came to her senses, her hand still tightly closed. He dragged her towards the others. "What happened?"

"I... I don't know," Rikku answered, opening her fist. A few swirls of black mist danced in her palm, emitting faint strains of sound. "A piece of the Farplane," she whispered in awe. So hypnotising…

"Stay focused!" Auron commanded.

Shaking her head, Rikku trapped the murky swirls of smoke in an empty vial. "We can't defeat an Espada by ourselves. Let's run!"

"What are its weaknesses?" Auron herded them away from the convulsing fiend.

"None that I know of," Rikku admitted. "It's super-fast, though, and if it scratches you, you'll be a goner."

Jecht bared his teeth. "So whadda we do?"

"You're asking me?" Rikku squeaked. "I point, you punch!"

Auron kept his eyes trained on the confused Espada as he joined Braska. "Are you injured?"

Staggering, Braska took Auron's outstretched hand and found his balance. "Sorry I failed you." His mouth set in a grim line. "But I can still fight."

"Oh great - it's regenerating already!" Rikku said in dismay. "It's got a tough hide - we've gotta hit it while it's still injured!"

"I'll reopen those wounds," Auron said, but Rikku held him back.

"You can't," she warned. "You're too slow."

"So it's up to us?" Jecht looked at his sword and shook his head in disbelief.

The Espada was recovering from its confusion and starting to trail after them; Rikku reached for the first spell she could find – Thundaga, of course – and threw it in the mad hope of delaying the fiend's approach. "Less talk, more fight!"

"Oh, I'll fight." Jecht planted his sword into the ground and mashed his thumb and forefingers into a triangle. A flare of white magic surrounded him as he let the spell fly. "Score!" He grabbed his sword with a mad cackle of delight, eager to strike.

Rikku raced after him, feeling a tingle of hope - or maybe that was just the Haste spell Braska was casting on them both - fill her. She'd recognized the magic Jecht used - a Slow spell. Maybe we can actually beat this thing!

Her euphoria died out as they engaged the fiend; Jecht's slashes were energetic, but he lacked Auron's experience. Ducking and slashing with her daggers, she watched him use the broad side of his massive sword to bat away the Espada's claw. "You're supposed to stick it with the pointy end!" she yelled, dodging another of the fiend's swipes.

"You try -- " Jecht puffed, parrying another thrust, " -- hitting this thing!"

Rikku smirked; half the battle was attitude, right? "I'll show you how it's done!" She darted between two of the creature's legs and dug her daggers into the weaker segment of an exposed joint. The Espada let out a screech of pain and whirled upon her, faster than she could see it move. Deadly black claws descended and Rikku threw herself back.

One claw grazed her torso, and black spots burst before her eyes. Rikku's rapid descent towards unconsciousness stopped with a violent pull; as her head cleared a few stray tufts of phoenix down dissipated.

"Up and at 'em!" Jecht yelled, swinging his sword at one of the Espada's legs.

Rikku launched herself into motion; she'd already learned the hard way that Espadas were attracted to phoenix downs like moths to a flame. Rolling across the ground, she escaped a repeat performance of the knockout.

"Holy moley!" Rikku leapt to her feet only to narrowly miss being impaled by another one of the creature's legs. This is definitely not the way to recover from a near-death experience! "Jecht! Do something!"

"I'm tryin'!" He was still hacking at the Espada's legs; all the speed in the world couldn't compete with Jecht's lack of skill. After a few futile attempts to distract the creature with his wild swings, Jecht cursed and simply hurled his sword as though it was a blitzball.

The sword whizzed over her head; she was showered with odourless goo as two of the fiend's severed legs collapsed at her side. Seizing the opportunity, Rikku wriggled her way out of the squealing insect's range.

"Strike!" Jecht crowed.

"You idiot!" Rikku replied, her hand snaking out to pull Jecht back towards Braska and Auron in a hasty retreat. Behind her, the Espada's shrieks died out; its legs were probably already regenerating.

A much-needed healing spell washed over Rikku. "We saw what happened," Braska said with worry. "Are you all right?"

"For the moment," Rikku wheezed. She faced Jecht. "I told you this thing had a tough hide! Only you or Auron can even think about piercing it with your swords, and Auron's way too slow!" This earned her a grunt of annoyance from Auron. "You just threw your own sword away! What are we gonna do now?"

"Retreat?" Braska said, picking up his robes and running from the battle. Rikku and Jecht followed, while Auron lingered at the rear as a guard.

"If we live," he huffed to Jecht as they ran, "we're going to have a lesson on proper grip!"

Jecht grimaced. "I threw it on purpose!"

Rikku stopped and turned around. Raising her hands, she tapped into the power of the Conflagration grid. Investing as much mana as she could into a Blizzaga spell, she created a wall of ice between their group and the enraged fiend. "That's not gonna hold," she declared, launching into a second spell.

"Are you tellin' me I shouldn't have saved you?" Jecht growled, catching his breath. "Don't know if you followed, Blondie, but that overgrown bug nearly killed you."

"And I'm grateful, but now you're out a sword and that thing's still coming for us!" Rikku groaned; they were running out of options, and not even her dresspheres could help them out of this one.

"We need a strategy," Braska said as the Espada scrabbled at the icy barrier, its murderous chittering rising in volume.

"Well, you could let me throw Auron's sword at it too," Jecht said.

Auron's grunt was unamused. He held his sword out as the barrier shuddered; a web of cracks spread through it. "The rest of you keep moving," he said. "I'll hold it here."

"Hell naw!" Jecht cast a Scan spell. "No fair takin' all the glory, man. It's still injured, them legs I chopped off ain't back yet. Let's make a comeback in the second half!"

Hit it with everything we got, Rikku thought as she cast again, restrengthening the barrier. Auron really is our only option left to hurt it, but I'm the only one fast enough to hit it. So if he's too slow, then…

"Somebody Haste Auron!" Rikku yelled as she leapt onto her target.

Surprised, Auron staggered and tried to shove away the questing fingers that reached inside of his coat.

"Rikkma!" he bellowed.

Reach low, she thought determinedly.

"I know you think we're all gonna die, Blondie, but this ain't really the time to be fillin' those last requests," Jecht said.

Ignoring them both, Rikku continued her search under the waistband of Auron's trousers. "Ah-ha!" she yelled, her fingers closing around the sack of gil they'd collected earlier and pulling it out. Dancing away, she hooked the pouch around her own belt and stuffed as many coins as she could into her palms.

Her three companions stared with varying degrees of disbelief, the heat of the battle momentarily forgotten. Oh well, she thought. It wasn't often that anyone dove into Auron's pants and lived to tell the tale. She'd just have to make sure she didn't fall victim to friendly fire. "Did you Haste him?" she asked, as the sound of splintering ice echoed over the field.

"Ah... yes, yes I did," Braska answered her.

She spread clumps of coins between her fingers and lifted her hands. The Espada stopped after clearing the icy rubble, staggering on its uneven legs. Regaining its balance, it scrabbled down the snow bank.

"Your plan?" Auron demanded, readying his sword.

"Hit him with everything you got when he's distracted." Rikku lifted her arms, sweating as she took aim. It'd been awhile since she'd literally thrown money away like this; wasting cash pained her to the bone. But, she thought with a mental sob, dead Summoner's entourages didn't need to eat, either. "Rush him now!" She spun and flicked her fingers out, letting the coins fly.

The money whizzed towards the Espada with a low whistle; the small size of the coins, coupled with their disproportionate weight allowed Rikku to launch them much faster than any dagger. Even a coin, when tossed just so, could be a formidable weapon; when there was more than one, they could be deadly. She reached back into the pouch and sent another spray flying without hesitation. They arced towards their target, creating a dangerous tapestry of thin golden threads.

Auron ran, closing the distance between himself and the fiend. The projectiles had their desired effect; though more than a few missed the mark, they still confused the Espada and created enough cover for Auron to break through its defense.

He charged in from the fiend's weakened side, avoiding the flailing stumps as he leapt. With a lithe twist, he brought his sword down on the creature's back, ramming the weapon into the wounds Bahamut had inflicted. The sound of chitin breaking filled the air as his heavy sword caught, tearing its victim open like a fish being gutted.

The piercing scream of the Espada echoed across the snowy canyon one last time, and then pyreflies erupted everywhere. Rikku sank to her knees, too exhausted to appreciate the lightshow drifting towards them. Soon, only bruises and the mournful echo of pyreflies remained.

Braska followed suit when the last pyrefly disappeared, and even Jecht fell backwards, breathing heavily.

Rikku's trip down from her adrenaline-induced battle high was fast and painful. "Holy chocobos," she gasped. "I really thought we were gonna buy it there!"

"We won't be buying anything in the near future." Auron trudged towards them. His eyes fixed on the ripped, discarded pouch that lay next to Rikku. Only a few coins remained, even less than they had started out with before their hunting and gathering session. Rikku winced.

"Sorry," she mumbled, waiting for Auron's inevitable explosion. When none was forthcoming, she cracked an eye open and glanced up at him.

He was still staring at the pouch with an unreadable expression. Finally, he leaned over and scooped it off of the ground, making a quick note of the coins remaining in the bag. Noticing Rikku's scrutiny, he gave her a miniscule shrug. "This pouch wasn't used to carrying much money anyway."

Braska looked up with an expression of mock surprise. "Why Auron. Are you implying that I might be financially disadvantaged?"

"I'm not implying anything," Auron answered, seating himself next to Rikku. "We are now poorer than Jecht's education."

"Heard that," Jecht mumbled from his position on the ground.

"Sorry. I meant to say we are fortunate that you have such extensive experience living frugally, my lord." Auron smirked.

"Now see, why can Auron get away with callin' you cheap when he's the real tightwad? You should be bustin' his balls, not mine!" Jecht protested, sitting up.

"Auron's abilities afford him a measure of tolerance that I'm afraid you haven't earned yet," Braska replied amicably. "When did you learn to cast time magic, and just where is your sword right now, Jecht?"

"I'm a pro blitzer. We all got our tricks. Helps with the game! Damned if I know what happened to the sword, though."

"Your sword should be an extension of yourself," Auron growled. "And it should be somewhere over that hill," he added, pointing back towards the canyon.

Jecht waved a lazy hand across the field. "I'm too tuckered out to get it right now." Then he brightened. "But whadda ya know, my ass ain't turnin' blue from the cold anymore!"

"Good," Auron said. "Then you'll feel it when I beat it." He made a motion as if to stand.

"Alright! Chill the hell out, Stiff, I'm gettin' it already!" Jecht sat up unwillingly, moving at a glacial rate.

Rikku covered her face, still trying to believe the conversation she was hearing. These three don't seem all that legendary. Auron cleared his throat, and Rikku peered at him through her fingers.

"Though this was an unexpected battle," Auron began, "we prevailed in the end. That wouldn't have been possible without your help, Rikkma." He paused, letting the words sink in. "You did well today."

Rikku couldn't help the smile that bubbled to the surface; Auron's words cloaked her like a gentle caress. Well, a gentle caress for Auron. Which was more like a brutal slap on the back from anyone else. But Rikku wasn't complaining – after all, a pat on the back was better than nothing, coming from the legendary Guardian of Grumpiness himself.

"If you glow any brighter you're gonna start meltin' the snow," Jecht observed, and Auron shifted uncomfortably. Rikku ignored them and continued to beam her thousand-watt smile towards its instigator.

Auron said I did good. Auron thanked me! Well, sorta. In her head, Rikku was doing handsprings through the snow. Her body was not feeling quite as cooperative, though; after a few moments of hopeful twitching, she managed to bump her shoulder against Auron's side. "Glad to help," she said through her grin, noting with amusement that Auron refused to look at her.

In fact, he was hyper-aware of the keen observation of Braska and Jecht, and rose to his feet. "Fiends attract fiends." He dusted some snow off of his coat. "We need to move out before any more unpleasant surprises occur."

A collective groan rose from the others, and Rikku pouted as she stood, sticking her tongue out at Auron's back. Jecht snickered, and Auron stiffened.

"Stop making those faces, Rikkma."

Rikku froze, tongue still extended. How does he do that? On a whim, she reached down and gathered the snow at her feet into a compact ball, tossing it at the back of Auron's head. It hit with a wet plop, and silence settled among the group. Nobody threw snowballs at Auron. He just wasn't the snowball-fight type. In fact, it was something of a wonder - or a clue to how tired he was - that Auron didn't turn around and cleave the offending snowball in half for daring to approach him. He turned slowly, a menacing glint in his eye.

"What was that for?"

Rikku crossed her arms and shrugged. After staring down an Espada, death glares from exhausted Guardians just didn't cut it anymore. "Chill out a little," she replied with a brazen wink. "I heard snow helps with that."

Auron glowered at her, then dropped his shoulders. "Be thankful I'm in no mood to respond to that attack right now," he grumbled.

Braska chuckled, moving to Rikku's side. "I think you've finally broken him, Rikkma. Auron just admitted that he may be willing to participate in a snowball fight."

"Humph," Auron grunted as he turned away and started walking. "Who said anything about snow?"

Braska's smile widened and he nudged Rikku, eliciting a giggle from her. Even Jecht was grinning as he sidled up to Auron and threw his arm across the other man's shoulders, whispering something into his ear. Whatever he said earned him a disgusted sigh; Auron all but shoved Jecht down the hill towards the missing sword.

Rikku trailed after them, feeling lighter somehow. "Click," she said, trying to bank her smile. She could feel it happening; they all could. It kept the grin on Braska's face, the lewd jokes spewing from Jecht, and stayed the tense set of Auron's shoulders. And, it filled them with enough energy to complete the last leg of their journey to Macalania's temple.

They were a group now, not just a motley collection of warriors thrown together by fate or circumstance. They were becoming something like friends.

Footnotes

Battle abilities in this chapter:

Death Claw [Espada]: instant K.O. if it hits
Spare Change [Rikku]: every 10 gil inflicts 1 point of special damage

Interesting to note, this ability is a special of the Samurai dressphere in FFX-2. I guess Auron learned something here today. ;-)

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

16: Bartering

"Jecht! Stop staring!" Rikku planted her elbow into his side.

With a wheeze, Jecht tore his eyes away from the frosty Guado standing at attention near the temple doors. Auron grunted his disapproval at their behavior, and Rikku stilled, drawing the hood of her threadbare cloak closer.

For once, Jecht seemed inclined to do the same and kept his usual antics to a minimum. That probably had less to do with their Guado guard or even Auron's stern eye. It was Macalania Temple itself which inspired a feeling of gravity in its visitors. Not that there was anyone else to impress – apart from the clergy who maintained the temple, the only other people Rikku saw were the stern Guado guards.

The atmosphere was quiet but for the ever-present Hymn and the soft ringing of the ice surrounding them – and even that was muted by heavy velvet banners of Yevon decorating the crystalline walls.

"You would do well not to antagonize the Guado," Auron murmured once they were out of the guard's range. "They've only been initiated into the church recently. There are still many disbelievers among them and they're extremely secretive. They prefer to keep the details of their culture and settlements to themselves, and they look upon outsiders with suspicion."

"In other words, even if they're guardin' the place, the Church don't trust 'em yet, right?" Jecht crossed his arms.

"And neither should we," Auron replied. "Don't go looking for trouble, because this is one place you're likely to find it."

Rikku made a face at Auron's choice of words, but bit her tongue and kept her opinions to herself. He was right, after all - the Guado of this time were still a proud, hostile people whose greatest amount of contact with the rest of Spira was relegated to their Blitzball team. That they were allowed to guard the temple at all was a surprising concession on the part of the Yevonites, and a testament to Lord Jyscal's powerful influence over his own people. Seymour's father was not yet a Maester, Rikku knew, but he'd already married into humanity and adopted Yevon's teachings as his own. Judging from the guards' attitudes, she could only wonder at the reaction that must have caused among their tightly-knit community.

"You should not say such things, Auron," Braska interrupted, giving Auron a reproving look. "The Guado are doing their best to understand us, and it is only fair that we observe the same courtesy."

"Yes, Lord Braska, forgive me." Auron looked uncomfortable and as convinced of the Guado's good intentions as Rikku felt. She wondered how Braska could turn a blind eye to the other race's obvious hostility.

"They don't look like they're tryin' too hard to me," Jecht said. "Did you see the look that one twisty-haired feller gave us when we came in? I thought he was gonna stick us with his pike just for showin' up!"

"They all have twisty hair, Jecht."

Jecht snorted. "An' they all gave us that look, too. Especially you, Blondie. If it weren't for Sin, I'm guessin' your people would be winnin' the competition for Spira's Most Unpopular." His look softened and his tone became somewhat less belligerent. "Don't it bug you sometimes?"

Not just sometimes, Rikku thought, tightening her grip on her cloak. She opened her mouth to make a glib reply, but stopped short when she caught sight of Auron. Was he watching her? What for? It wasn't like Jecht made a particularly ground-breaking observation there. Rikku shrugged. "You get used to it," she said.

"You should not have to," Braska murmured, killing Rikku's chance to divert the unpleasant conversation into a more light-hearted direction. An uncomfortable silence followed, one that was made heavier by the stillness of the temple.

Rikku suppressed a flinch, her eyes darting to the center of the room - the place where Yuna and her team had confronted both Seymour and the warped remainder of his mother. This will always be the place where we first killed more than just a fiend – where everything started going wrong, even worse than it was before. It didn't matter that Seymour had been trying to kill them, that Yevon's religion was as warped and twisted as Anima, or even that the act itself wouldn't occur for another decade. To Rikku, the very stones of the floor oozed guilty memories.

"I'm being paranoid," Rikku mumbled, trying to hide within the folds of her cloak.

"Whatever," Jecht said. "I still think these Guado guys make the guards back in Bevelle look like amateurs." He took another look around the nearly-empty temple. "Why are we the only ones here, anyway? Those guards scarin' all the other visitors away?"

"Well..." Braska said, "In a manner of speaking, yes. The remote location of this particular temple, coupled with the oddity of the new Guado initiates has made Macalania one of the least popular stops of any Pilgrimage. The Summoners that do venture here generally prefer not to linger."

The slight undercurrent of anger in Braska's tone caused Rikku more surprise that she had expected; it wasn't really that odd to discover that her uncle felt strongly about more than just the Al Bhed cause. That he would defend the xenophobic Guado annoyed Rikku, and, on a much deeper level than she would've liked to admit, made her feel even more guilty.

Why does he have to be so good all the time? Rikku thought with frustration. She glanced at Braska to see Auron reaching out to rest his hand on the Summoner's back.

"You alone cannot change the way an entire people think. Especially not when they..." he inclined his head back towards the guards, "do not want or even welcome your assistance."

Braska's jaw twitched, and then his shoulders dropped as he let out an audible breath. "I know," he replied, sounding tired. "I have already tried, after all."

"Then concentrate on fulfilling your own duty and leave the philosophical questions for others," Auron replied, pushing Braska towards the door to the inner sanctum. "Maybe one day the tension with the Guado will disappear. Today is not that day. Your only task now is to gain the power of the Fayth. Let the Guado take care of Guado problems."

Braska straightened, wiping away his disappointment and settling his face into a passive mask. "You are right, of course. Come, let us make our way to the Cloister of Trials." He lead them up the steps towards the heavy double doors, and with a perfunctory nod to the priest, passed through.

The temperature of the room behind the doors was frigid. Rikku watched the plume of her white breath rise in front of her when she sighed. "And here I was getting used to feeling my toes again."

"Whoa..." Jecht stared at the snow-covered platform they'd stepped onto. "This ain't anything like that other place! It's kinda like bein' outside, huh? So... what're we supposed to do here?"

A very relevant question, Rikku had to admit; apart from a few large snow drifts scattered around the platform, the Cloister presented few clues as to where to begin.

"Well... I suppose we could start with that," Braska said, pointing his staff at one glowing sphere set into the niche of a tall column. Auron strode forward before anyone else could and faced the group.

"Allow me to handle the spheres. We still don't know what the nature of the trial that awaits us will be." He turned his attention to Rikku and lifted an eyebrow. "Will you be so kind as to assist me, Rikkma?"

Rikku peered at Auron from under the shadows of her hood. "Hey, why me? Why not ask Jecht?"

"Ask Jecht for help?" Auron repeated, his gaze shifting to the man. Jecht looked up from where he was squatting, as he carefully placed his weapon on the snow.

"You talkin' to me or about me?" Jecht asked, straightening up and testing the sword with a pink-booted foot. Seeing the others' incredulous looks, he scratched the back of his head. " 'Sup?"

"What the heck are you doing?" Rikku asked for everyone else.

"Oh, this?" Jecht looked back down at his sword. "Snow-swordin'! What else?" His smile dropped when Auron's glare intensified. "What? It's not like the Stiff over there is gonna ask me for help. Might as well have a little fun, right?"

"... right," Auron finished for him, turning a smug eye back towards Rikku.

"Auron, please. It might actually be enjoyable to unlock the puzzle this time." Braska smiled helpfully.

"It's too dangerous," Auron said, and Rikku resisted the urge to smack her forehead. It wasn't that she wanted to slow down their progress… I just hate this temple. It felt a little unfair, too - when it came to the Cloister of Trials, Rikku was a walking cheat sheet. She huffed; even if Braska was destined to obtain every last aeon, that didn't mean she was going to make it any easier for him.

"Oh, come off it, Auron!" Rikku said, exasperated. "It's not like Braska's gonna break if he does a little work. Besides, isn't this supposed to test a Summoning party's worthiness to receive the aeon? Correct me if I'm wrong here, but I always figured the Summoner was the most important part of that party."

Auron's scowl deepened as a grateful smile appeared on Braska's face. "Thank you for your support, Rikkma," Braska said. "Now if only Auron could have your faith in me as well..."

Ouch, Rikku thought as she smirked at Auron. Braska really knew how to hit below the belt.

Auron grimaced and then sighed. "Fine. You may accompany us, Lord Braska, but stand back and don't touch the spheres until we've determined they're safe." He turned towards the pillar and stopped again with a distinct look of impatience at Rikku's obvious hesitation.

"Umm, actually, why don't you two try it by yourselves? I've got something I need to do over here," she said.

"Yeah! Get Auron to lend you his blade!" Jecht hollered as he sailed by, balancing expertly on his sword. He twisted to a stop next to her.

"Jecht," Rikku sang as she felt Auron glowering at them both. "You're not helping! Go... swordboard over there." She shooed him away. Getting moral support from Jecht was too much like painting a bull's-eye on your back.

"And no, I don't wanna slack off just to screw around," Rikku added, fishing out her supply pouch and dangling it in front of Auron's nose. "I wanna check out the loot we collected during our break. I need a little alone space to do it, and I think you guys are gonna be busy, right?" She tried her best to ignore Auron's disapproval. Braska came to her rescue.

"Auron, let Rikkma stay behind this time. She must be weary from our travels, and I for one am looking forward to this challenge." His tone was soft, but the command was clear. "I am sure we can manage this one by ourselves."

"Hnn," Auron said. "Very well. Stay alert and keep an eye on Jecht. If the need for battle arises, I expect both of you to be prepared." He paused, and Rikku wondered why he hadn't dragged Braska off towards the pillar. Then she watched with surprise as he reached into his coat and flung a tattered pouch at her. Catching it, she heard the familiar jingle of coin in her hands.

"You're trusting me with the money?" Rikku blurted out before she could stop herself.

Auron's lips twitched with a hint of humor. "You might as well count it while you're tallying our inventory," he told her. "Besides, I haven't seen very many places for you to waste it here." The smile dropped off and a more familiar expression of annoyance returned as Auron regarded the pillar with the sphere. "Let's get to it," he told Braska, who nodded.

"Auron," Rikku called out before he walked away. She beckoned him closer, ignoring his look of confusion. "I'm real sorry I can't help out this time," she said, and then lowered her voice when Braska glanced their way. "... but if you find another one of those... y'know... pink spheres, maybe you could give it to me before Braska sees it."

Auron's eyes widened in understanding. "You... you believe we'll find another one here," he murmured, and Rikku tried to tell herself it was the cold that made her shiver then.

"I'm just saying in case you find one," Rikku replied, feeling her guilt once more.

Auron stared at her, and Rikku fidgeted.

"No. You're certain we'll find one," he stated. "You want me to protect Braska. How do you know of these spheres and what they are doing here, in the Temple?"

Rikku swallowed. "Braska's starting to wonder what the hold-up is," she told him, meeting his flinty gaze. "Keep this up and you'll be hand-feeding Jecht even more material to throw at us. Or am I really that fascinating?" She batted her eyelashes at him.

"Fascinating isn't the first word I'd choose," Auron replied, but he did back away. "One of these days you won't be able to slip by my questions. I'll do as you ask for now. For Braska's sake. But I warn you, my patience isn't infinite."

"Grumpy," Rikku muttered as he stomped away, wondering what explanation he gave to Braska, who was now watching them with interest. Well, there was nothing she could do about Auron's suspicions at the moment, and besides - what she told him hadn't been a complete lie.

After stomping on the snow to pack it, Rikku settled on the ground and dumped the contents of her pouch out before her. Despite all the back-breaking teamwork between herself and Auron on the snowfields, their supply of items was still meager. There were a few gems in the assortment of goods they'd managed to win or steal from fiends since the start of their journey - the crowning one being the small bottle of swirling, black wind from the Espada. Rikku put that away first, unwilling to let the Farplane Wind throw her into another strange trance. It was much too precious to waste on what she had in mind, anyway. She sorted through the remaining goods and frowned at the results.

"A few potions... fine... a couple of hi-potions... those will come in handy," she noted, tucking them away. "Hmm... hey, we actually have ethers!" Rikku squealed with delight. She counted them and then frowned, placing the vials aside. Stabbing her finger into the snow, she drew a careful circle around them. "Let's see what else we've got," she continued, grabbing a few more items. "Fish scales... fish scales... and more fish scales. Geez, these things are worthless!"

She threw the small handful into the circle, and then sifted through the remaining glass vials. "Maybe this isn't so bad… some musk, a couple of hypello potions... is that an arctic wind?" Her eyes lit with glee as one small marble rolled away from the rest of the items, crackling with energy. "A lightning marble! Somebody up there loves me!" She picked up the tiny bead and kissing it, wincing as it shocked her on the lips.

Once the rest of the items were either packed away in her bags or sorted into what Rikku was starting to call her "magic circle," she reached into her travel pack and laid out the real reasons she had asked to stay behind.

The metal glinted against the white snow, practically screaming with potential at her. Rikku grinned and fingered the silver necklace, the one she had whittled into the shape of Jecht's tattoo. "Alright! It's tinker time!"

Pulling a few tools out of her belt, she squinted in concentration and began to work, falling into the single-minded trance required of any skilled Al Bhed synthesist.

In what seemed like moments later, a shadow fell over her, and Rikku hissed in irritation. "You're blocking my light," she grumbled. When the shadow refused to move, Rikku grunted and pushed her bangs away from her eyes, searching for the source of her distraction. She did a double-take as she noticed Auron's quizzical expression. "What the... hey, I thought you and Braska were gonna solve the Trials! Why're you back already? What gives?"

"I told ya, she's been like that for a while now." Rikku whipped her head around, finally noticing Jecht, who was sitting cross-legged behind her rather than sledding across the snow on his sword. From his bored expression and the way his chin was planted into his palm, it seemed like he'd been there for a while. "At first I thought she was havin' one of them seizures, but I don't think she could be weldin' like that if she wasn't all here."

"Welding?" Auron lifted an eyebrow.

Rikku blinked. "Huh? Oh, this is just a little something I carry around with me," she explained, waving the small tool in her hand. "I picked it up in Bevelle! It's not up to Al Bhed standards, but it'll do in a pinch."

"Do what?" Auron asked.

"Solder, dummy. It is a soldering iron," she replied with a smirk. It was getting a bit easier to orient herself; from the crick in her neck and the uncomfortable damp of melted snow under her butt, Rikku figured that she'd lost track of more time than she thought during her work. She stretched, taking in her surroundings and noting with some approval that Auron and Braska had managed to make progress - if the shifting locations of the various ice pillars and snow drifts were any indication of success. "Hey, where's Braska?"

"Braska is on the lower level of this puzzle chamber, piecing together our next step." As he spoke, Auron discreetly pulled a shining pink sphere out from the depths of his coat and displayed it to Rikku, who mouthed a small "Oh!" of understanding. "But what are you doing?" he asked, hiding the sphere as he looked over the no-longer-quite-silver jewellery that was scattered around her.

"Well, you didn't think I bought all this decoration for nothing, did you?" Rikku picked up another vial and put the finishing touches on the circlet with her soldering iron. "There. Braska and Jecht's stuff is done. I even made a bracelet for myself!" Rikku proudly displayed the blue bangle dangling off her wrist. "Of course, I didn't make you anything, Auron, since you didn't want anything." Seeing their confused looks, Rikku grinned at her two companions and waved the small tool at them. "Didn't I tell you guys? I'm a synthesist."

"I'm not familiar with the term." Auron crouched in the snow beside her and plucked the circlet out of her hands.

Rikku concealed a faint smile of pride at his look of surprise; Cid always said she was one of the best. Being able to create a good, stable armor required more than just the know-how; like most Al Bhed inventions, it also took a bit of luck and a fair amount of creativity - things that she had in spades.

"Synthesis. It's what we Al Bhed do to create our superior weapons and armor," she explained, enjoying the flash of annoyance that stole across Auron's face. "Oh, don't be such a grouch. I'd be happy to synthesize something for you, too, if you'd just leave me your bracer."

" 'ey now! Stop flirtin' with Auron and show me what you made me!" Jecht said, pushing between them. "I know I heard my name in there somewhere!"

Rikku snickered and selected the necklace, which she handed to Jecht. "I call this the Serene," she told him. "Because you're always complaining about the cold," she added, flicking the pendant and causing it to spin. As it did, a few bright blue sparks jumped from the metal and swirled around it before fading away. "It'll keep you from going berserk if a fiend hits you the wrong way, and it has a little frost-guard in it, too. It's not much, but just put it on and you shouldn't feel so cold anymore."

"This looks just like my tattoo!" Jecht caught the pendant and let out a low whistle. "How'd you do it?"

"I looked," Rikku replied, digging a finger into Jecht's chest. She drew it back when a lewd smile spread across his face.

"I knew you were ooglin' my chest that time!" he crowed. "Sorry, Auron, didn't mean to be movin' in on your girl like that, but I really am too sexy for a shirt." He smirked as he donned the necklace.

Auron covered his eyes and Rikku planted her palm right into Jecht's face and shoved him away. "Dream on, horndog. That tattoo of yours is more like an eyesore that can't be avoided. But hey, maybe now that pendant will distract a few people before they hurt their eyes!"

Jecht stretched out, a lazy grin on his face. "Yeah, yeah. Get in line, you know ya want me."

Sighing wearily, Auron renewed his observation of the circlet. "And this is for Braska...?" Seeing Rikku's nod, he rotated the piece in his hands. "What does it do?"

"Well," she began, feeling nervous. Auron's stern, probing expression hearkened back to the older, intimidating man from Yuna's Pilgrimage whom she was more familiar with. She received the fleeting impression of being graded on her efforts, and cleared her throat. "It's just a little something I threw together to make casting easier for Braska. I hope you don't mind, but I used up all of our ethers on it." Auron's face remained just as unreadable as before, and Rikku plowed on. "Uh, and, I also used a few sleeping powders, too. That should keep him awake if a sleeper fiend attacks!" She trailed off and worried her lower lip, waiting for Auron to pronounce judgement on her efforts.

"... and you need my bracer, you said?" he asked, looking up at her.

Rikku's eyes grew round. Was he saying what she thought he was saying? Not only was he trusting her with the money, but also with their protection. She scrambled for an appropriate reaction. Gratitude? But that would imply she was a suck-up - and to a former Yevonite, of all people. Then again, it was Auron, the not-yet-legendary Guardian, giving her his vote of confidence. What was the appropriate reaction to have?

Unfortunately, while Rikku's mind was stalling, once again her mouth decided to open and answer the question for her independent of her brain. "Actually, what I really need is your sword and Braska's staff, too." She winced. Oh, that wasn't quite what I meant to say…

"You want our weapons," Auron said slowly. "You want to disarm us and experiment on our weapons." He set the circlet down.

"When you put it like that…" She grimaced. "... yeah?"

"Well, she got balls," Jecht muttered behind them.

A chilly silence rose, and then Auron reached towards his chest and unfastened the buckles there. The heavy sheath on his back clattered to the ground; it was followed by the bracer on his arm. "Braska can decide for himself whether or not to lend you his staff when he returns," Auron said. "I trust you won't damage my sword. If you do, I assure you that I can find other things to stick you with."

A damning silence fell as Auron realized what he'd said. He whirled around to Jecht, eyes narrowed. "Open that mouth of yours…"

Jecht's smug smirk said more than enough as he pantomimed zipping his lips.

Rikku, for her part, tried to stop her face from self-combusting. I can't believe he said that! "Uh, sure Auron. Anytime, I think?" She glued her eyes to the equipment Auron had dropped to avoid his reaction. "You know, it's gonna take me a while to get used to this."

"Get used to what?" Jecht asked, scooting closer to her. "Havin' the Stiff at your beck and call?" He snickered and Rikku zapped Jecht on the shin with her soldering iron. "Oww! Damn it, Blondie! What the hell was that for?"

"Why don't you go help out Braska?" Rikku told him. She brandished the iron in a clear threat when Jecht opened his mouth to protest. "I don't care how you feel; get motivated or else!"

"A woman with balls ain't always a good thing," Jecht groused as he stood up. He trudged past a smirking Auron, pausing only to mutter "At least she ain't my problem. Just behave, kiddos - I don't think Yevon approves of doggin' in the temples."

Rikku waited until he was gone before she spoke again. "Jecht's an okay guy when he can keep his mouth shut. Which is like never!" Rolling her eyes, Rikku put the iron down and turned her attention to Auron, beckoning him closer. After a moment of hesitation, he approached her and sunk to one knee.

"What I meant was... well, it's gonna take a while to get used to this," Rikku said. "You know. Being one of you. Being... trusted." She wondered what he thought of her confession; Auron had a killer poker face.

Auron said nothing for a long moment, and Rikku caught herself studying the curves of his youthful face and comparing it to her memories.

"When you look at me that way," he said, and Rikku snapped her eyes back to his. "Who are you seeing?"

Rikku shook her head at him.

"It isn't just Raenn, is it. I remind you of someone. He is the reason you're here with us. This man who was taken by Sin."

Unable to answer him, Rikku could only nod.

Auron sighed and looked away from her. "His memory binds you to the past. That's why you feel you don't belong with us."

To the future, Rikku corrected. But she watched in fascination as Auron continued to speak. This time, he was reaching out to her, and she wasn't going to do anything to jeopardize the moment - even if it was fulfilling the very guilty desire he was trying to advise her against.

"You shouldn't let obsession with the dead rule your life. You have potential. Live for yourself instead of your memories. Be more than a simple thief and exile." He gestured at his sword and armor. "Rikku. All jests aside, I trust you. You've proven that trust to be well-founded. Why, then, are you surprised?"

"Say, what'd you do with the Auron I know?" Rikku asked, a small smile crossing her face. "What's with the pep talk? I think Braska's rubbing off on you." Her smile clouded as Auron's gaze grew fierce. He caught her wrist and held it still.

"And again, you try to deflect the conversation with your jokes." He sighed in frustration. "I want you to understand what I'm trying to tell you, Rikku. I want you to be able to move on."

Rikku held his gaze. "Why?" she asked, her breath hitching. "Is it because you want me to move on?" Do you want me?

Auron didn't answer her for a long moment. "I don't want you looking at me as though I am someone else," he replied. "I'm not. You can't recreate the past out of memories and your own desires. You asked if we were friends, before. I want to be, Rikku, but it's not easy if you don't see me for who I am."

"It's not that simple." She reached up and traced the outline of his future scar across his face, stopping when he flinched away. "I know that you can't get back what you lost," she said bitterly. Not unless your name is Yuna. "But I can't just drop everything and start over again." With you, she added to herself.

"Why not?" he asked. "A Pilgrimage is a fresh start for some. A last chance for others. It's a vehicle for change. Will you not even try?"

Who was this man, holding her wrist and making her heart race as he probed her with his questions? This wasn't the cool, distanced legend of memory; the stoic, self-sacrificing, hard-assed hero she had journeyed with before. This man was infinitely more dangerous; just as hard-assed as she remembered, but full of something she hadn't even realized the other Auron was missing – a passion and vitality that refused to remain hidden, either in his brief flares of temper or now, in his searching gaze. Suddenly scared, she refused to answer him. You want to go home, Rikku reminded herself sternly. And every Fayth you meet is a chance to do just that.

"Well, then," Auron said, dropping her wrist when she didn't answer. His voice lost its warmth; he withdrew the destruction sphere from his cloak and handed it over. "Then can you at least explain this? How did you know it would be here?"

Rikku gripped the sphere tightly. Her relationship with Auron was one of bartering, she realized. He had just given her more than she ever expected to receive. Trust him, her mind whispered, he's Auron. He won't break apart. She nodded slowly. "These things... they're called destruction spheres," Rikku explained. "They're created by the Temples, just like all the other spheres."

"How can a thing of such evil exist in a Temple of Yevon?" Auron asked.

Rikku sighed. How to explain it all without sending Auron into a religious crisis? "It's not a question of good or evil," she said. "In case you haven't noticed, the Church of Yevon isn't all smiles and sunshine. I... well, I don't really know for sure how everything works, but the temples reflect the Church. And the Church has its dark side, too."

She shivered as she thought of the festering hatred and hopelessness that had created Anima. But in the end, despite its evil, Yuna mastered that summon, just as she had every other known aeon. "There's a little bit of darkness in every Temple, but it's how the Summoners use their aeons that matters in the end."

"So we should expect to find these pockets of evil in every temple we visit?"

"Pockets of profit," Rikku said, climbing to her feet. "If you find the right place to plant the sphere, something good will happen for sure. Now let's see..."

Auron reached for his equipment when she stood up, but Rikku waved him down. "Don't bother. There won't be any fiends in the Cloisters. It's never a physical challenge, you know?"

"No, I don't," Auron said. "My question is, how do you?" Stopping, he looked her over with newfound interest. "You were telling the truth in the forest that night, weren't you. You really were an Al Bhed Guardian."

"I still am," Rikku told him with a slight smile. "Now come on, I don't really remember where this thing is supposed to fit, but we don't want Braska seeing it." She set off, approaching the first empty sphere slot she could find. Wedging it in, they waited, but nothing happened.

"That's not it," she mumbled, removing the sphere and moving on to the next column. "How many of these niches did you find, anyway? We might have to test them all..." Rikku trailed off as she slotted the sphere into the recess and a blaze of pink spiralled down into the floor. "Or not. Jackpot!"

"That light... it's moving directly towards Braska and Jecht," Auron noted, his eyes widening as they traced the path of the glow. He reached for the sword that he normally kept on his back and closed his hand around empty air, then cursed. The sound of a loud crash echoed through the hall, followed by Jecht's yell.

"Oww! What the hell was that?"

"Jecht!" Braska's voice sounded strained. "Do you think you might be able to stand - oomph - someplace other than my back?"

"Well, I guess Jecht is fine. I dunno about Braska though," Rikku observed. "I bet that explosion uncovered a treasure box, too!" she continued with excitement. "Whatever it is, I call dibs on a fourth of the booty!"

Auron let out a barely restrained sigh. "I'm surrounded by infants," he muttered to himself, stalking towards the plateau leading to the lower level of the cloister. He paused as Rikku pulled on his coat. "What is it?"

"Umm..." Rikku beat down her rising blush. "Thanks. For lots of things," she said. "What you asked me to do - it's not exactly easy for me. But I've thought about what you said, and I really want to get to know you."

Auron inclined his head towards her. "I look forward to it."

"Well… you better get going now. I wanna finish your stuff before we leave here."

He nodded at her, and Rikku watched Auron until he disappeared. Returning to her own workstation, she looked down at his sword and bracer.

"I guess I saved the best for last," she murmured. Her smile slid off her face as a hand crept to her belt, lingering over the Samurai sphere. "You know, I don't wanna to fall in love with you, not now." Shaking her head, Rikku cracked her knuckles and settled on the ground, grabbing Auron's bracer. "Well... it isn't the time for this." She let out a panicked giggle. "Definitely not the time."

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

17: Cold Hard Truth

Rikku sighed into her palm and watched the heavy stone door with half-lidded eyes. The silence was oppressive; she yawned loudly just to hear herself break it. Things were much the same as they had been in Bevelle's Chamber of the Fayth - Braska, secluded in the inner sanctum, was taking a long time. The rest of his entourage waited outside - bored out of their minds, Rikku added to herself. The hush of the temple put a damper on light conversation.

Auron weathered the wait with his usual stoic resolve; he could have passed for one of the statues, standing in the corner with his arms crossed and a solemn expression on his face. Jecht, on the other hand, sprawled lazily across the steps.

Rikku, for her part, waited a good distance away from the entrance to the inner sanctum, unwilling to subject herself to another seizure. She was sure something bad would happen if she tried to force her way into the summoning altar. The heavy feeling of being observed had returned when the door first opened, causing her to tense with anticipation. But she kept herself still, and as Braska passed through, the stone door had shut behind him without incident.

I just didn't want to end up convulsing at Auron's feet again while foaming at the mouth. That's why I didn't try finding a way in with Braska. Rikku tried to will away the small, inner voice that argued against her rationalization. It's not that I want to stay with these guys. Really.

Her conscience sounded suspiciously like one of Paine's exasperated sighs.

Head buzzing from her mental argument, Rikku pushed herself off the wall. I need a distraction. Digging through her pouch, she seated herself on the floor and pulled out an empty recording sphere, fiddling with the controls.

"Rikkma," Auron said as he watched her. "Braska is communing with the Fayth as we speak. You shouldn't -"

"Oh, stuff it," Rikku answered. "You know I don't believe in any of those hokey-pokey machina superstitions. How many times have you been recorded already, Auron? Looks like your soul's still here to me," she added, switching the sphere on and purposefully focusing on him. Auron flinched, but to his credit but didn't move out of the way. The sour expression he directed at her, however, made clear what he thought of both her recording and her behavior. With a twinge of guilt, Rikku turned the sphere around and aimed it at herself instead.

"Fine, I'm more fun to look at than you anyway." She winked at the glowing orb. Spheres are strange, she thought, studying the bubbling blue liquid it contained. Though filled with Macalania's purest water, they didn't ever reflect images, instead absorbing them for later viewing when properly charged. In a way, they could be seen as a rather vampiric devices -- not that she was going to tell Auron that anytime soon, though. Fisting her palm against her chin, Rikku stared back into the depthless blue glow and quirked an eyebrow. "I wonder what I should do with you, huh? Keep a diary of our Pilgrimage?" Thinking about it for only a moment, Rikku shook her head. "No way. Those kinds of things always come back to bite you in the butt later on!"

"Why don't you use it to film me instead?" Jecht pushed himself off of the steps and sauntered over, feeling bored enough to bother her. "I'm a superstar! I'm used to all that attention!" He struck a pose, and Rikku giggled while rolling her eyes.

"Just for that I'm not going to record you at all," she said, keeping the sphere trained on her face and sticking out her tongue.

"But I'm bored!" Jecht whined as he crossed his arms. "Braska's takin' forever an' I don't even have a blitzball to keep me company here!"

"Thank Yevon," Auron muttered under his breath.

Rikku frowned as she watched Jecht pace. He did seem rather jumpy; on a good day, Jecht was hyperactive anyway. But she'd noticed him getting more twitchy, for lack of a better word, the longer they waited. He wasn't so restless when they were on the move, but here in the temple with nothing but silence and your own thoughts to occupy the time, it stood out all the more.

Placing the sphere on the floor, Rikku reached over and poked Jecht's ankle to draw his attention. She drew back in surprise when he spun around and glared at her. Whoa, nervous much? "Hey, are you okay?" she asked under her breath.

Rikku made sure that Auron wasn't watching them. Fortunately, he'd gone back to ignoring Jecht the moment the whining began. Rikku figured he was meditating with his eyes open, or some other warrior monk junk. Whatever he was doing, it worked effectively to block out any and everything that had to do with Jecht. Now, however, she questioned the wisdom of Auron's strategy, as a twinge of concern struck her. She suspected she knew the source of Jecht's problem, but it would've been easier to deal with if Auron showed even the barest flicker of interest.

"Just restless," Jecht finally answered her. He ran a hand over his face and then sent a look of envy towards Auron... or more accurately, Auron's jug. "Sure could use a drink right now, though," he added as an afterthought. "You think he'd loan me some of that stuff if I asked nice?"

"Loan?" Rikku sputtered. "What, like you'd give it back when you were done? How'd you plan on doing that, by yakking all over him?"

"Well, it'd be more interestin' than sitting around here on my thumbs," Jecht growled at her. Then he sighed. "Sorry. Just... all this hurryin' up to do nothin'... it gets to me sometimes."

Rikku kept silent, her brow furrowing. It wasn't the lack of activity that had Jecht tied up in knots - it was the lack of alcohol. She remembered the vague stories Tidus used to tell during the times he tried so hard to convince them -- and himself -- that he hated his father. There had to have been a grain of truth in them, for all of Tidus' theatrics.

Watching Jecht's nervous pacing, she wondered just how much he usually drank. Well, it doesn't concern me, Rikku thought. If I play my cards right, I won't even have the time to deal with Jecht's drinking problem. Still, she felt a pang of sympathy for his plight and decided to try to help by distracting him.

"Hey, why don't you join me down here?" Rikku offered, pulling a few coins out of their near-empty purse. "We can pass the time together. I'll teach you how to play Sphere Break!"

"Sphere Break? That some kinda game?"

"Uh-huh," Rikku said, laying out the coins in the appropriate pattern. She smirked; maybe it was unfair to challenge Jecht, a complete stranger to the game. She had won that embarrassing dressphere off of Shinra, reigning Sphere Break Champion, after all. "Sit down and I'll tell you all about it," she said with a twinkle in her eye.

It took more than a few tries to explain the rather complex set of rules. It wasn't made easier by the lack of "prizes" to offer for winning, something Jecht complained about loudly enough to garner even Auron's attention.

"What's the point of playin' if you don't win anything?" Jecht asked.

"It's supposed to be fun," Rikku shot back.

"Keep the noise down," Auron grunted with a long-suffering sigh. His eyes passed over the coins scattered across the ground with a look of distaste. "Sometimes I wonder why I even try."

"Then stop wondering and come play with us!" Rikku pouted.

"Or just stop tryin', you know we won't listen to you anyway," Jecht added.

Auron huffed, resuming his purposeful disinterest in their existence.

"Come on, Jecht. I can't play Sphere Break by myself! You're bored, I'm bored, what else are we gonna do here anyway?"

"Look, Blondie," Jecht replied, gesturing at the coins in the sample game Rikku had created, "if I understand the rules, part of the fun is thinkin' up a way to get all those extra prizes if you play your coins right. So you can't really play without a prize, see?"

Rikku sighed. He had a point, she was loathe to admit. "But I don't have anything to give you!"

"Huh," Jecht said, a sly smile spreading over his face. "I think you do. How 'bout this..." He pointed at one of the coins and leaned in towards her, lowering his voice. "This one's your lucky coin, you don't have to do anything if I get it. But..." And here, Jecht's hand hovered over the adjoining coin. "Ten of these lands me a smooch." He continued gleefully as Rikku's mouth dropped open in protest. "Ten of those other ones makes Braska the lucky guy. And..." Rikku dropped her head into her hand, already knowing what Jecht was going to say and feeling the flush of embarrassment creeping over her face. "Eighteen of these makes Big Red over there smile."

Rikku's head shot up. "Why does Auron get eighteen?" she squawked, and then flushed even more as Auron swung around to stare at them suspiciously.

Jecht laughed. " 'Cause he likes playin' hard to get!"

Auron raised a questioning eyebrow at her, and Rikku shook her head and pointed at Jecht in the hopes that it would suffice as an explanation. That seemed to work, as Auron grunted in exasperation and resumed his aloof meditation.

Relieved, Rikku put her hands on her cheeks and willed her blush to die down. It wasn't so much that she was embarrassed about the "prizes" Jecht had selected - more about her own reaction if he won some of them. But still...

"Eighteen?" she hissed furiously, narrowing her eyes at Jecht, who gave her a knowing smirk. At this rate, she might as well have a sign tattooed to her forehead that read "RIKKU LOVES AURON." Jecht and his stupid mind games! Weighing her options, Rikku gave in. After all, it was a toss-up: morose introspection while watching Jecht go through withdrawal, or having a chance to kiss Auron and blame the whole thing on Jecht later on. Glowering, she gave him a quick, guilty nod of agreement. "You'd better be damn good at math!" she warned, spreading the coins out before him. "Now solve this one in sixty seconds starting right now!"

Fifteen minutes later, Rikku had learned a couple of things about Jecht. The first was that he was terrible at math. The second was that despite this shortcoming, he was excellent at strategy on the fly - the mark of any good blitzball player, she figured. She was still two coins away from earning the responsibility -- you mean the chance, her inner voice cheered -- to kiss Auron. Due to Jecht's incompetence she already owed Braska one kiss, and was four perilous steps away from having to actually kiss Jecht himself. The last, however, might have been attributed more to his own perverse sense of humor rather than his mediocre mastery of Sphere Break.

Auron, for his part, was still blissfully unaware of his prize status, which was probably a good thing. Sphere Break wasn't a quiet game, at least it not when Jecht and Rikku played it. They both had a tendency to be boisterous, and when things got too loud Auron's glare would materialize, sometimes accompanied by the conspicuous clearing of his throat. After one too many arguments over the results, Auron pushed off from the wall and approached them with an air of barely-restrained annoyance.

"You both should know better than to gamble in a temple," he told them. "Even if you don't believe in Yevon, the least you could do is show the proper respect here." He scowled at the forgotten sphere that was nestled on the ground, eying its soft blue glow. "And turn that blasted thing off!"

"Oopsie!" Rikku reached for the sphere and deactivated it. This earned her another snort of disapproval, and she rolled her eyes at a smirking Jecht. "For your information, Auron," she said, "we're not gambling. We're just using the coins to play a game, not trading them." Auron didn't look convinced, so she shrugged. "Hey, it could be worse. We could be playing poker instead."

Jecht snorted. "Naw, that wouldn't happen. If ya want a real game of poker, you'd have a stiff drink and some fine lookin' women at your table, and as you can see, we're sorely lackin' in both." He grinned at Rikku and gave her a wink.

Rikku threw daggers with her eyes towards Jecht. "You know, I'm feeling a sudden need to practice my Gil Toss," she growled, gathering the coins into her hand. The quiet sound of rumbling cut off her threat before any bodily harm could be inflicted, and all eyes turned towards the stairs.

The stone door to the inner sanctum lifted. Rikku held her breath; after a few moments, Braska emerged from the darkness, his face damp with sweat. The fortitude potion she'd dosed him with had long since worn off, and he looked weaker than ever. As much as they helped in times of need, crashing from a mix high tended to be ugly -- there was a reason the human body could only push itself so far, after all.

"I did it," he managed to say with a proud smile, stepping forward. And then he tripped, and everyone was scrambling to catch him.

Rikku, being the fastest of the group, made it to him first. She was, in fact, quick enough to catch a glimpse of the inner sanctum. There before her was the chance she'd been waiting for. She could slip through if she dove right now; nothing was stopping her. And then there was Braska, on the verge of losing consciousness, falling.

Afterwards, Rikku questioned her actions - why she didn't think clearly and take the chance that presented itself. But in the heat of the moment, there didn't seem to be much of a choice at all. She was Braska's Guardian -- she was there to protect him, not herself. The air left her lungs in a gasp as Braska's body knocked into her open arms. For someone with a willowy build, he sure was heavy.

"Help!" Rikku wheezed as she fell backwards over the steps with Braska in tow.

"Whoa there, I gotcha," Jecht said as he caught them both and righted her carefully. Auron was there to ease Braska out of her grasp, slinging the other man's arm over his shoulder.

"My lord!" he said with concern as Braska blinked and looked around. "You should rest -- "

"No!" Braska said, pushing himself away from Auron and wavering on his feet before regaining his balance. "No, I'm fine," he added in a more subdued tone. "I'm just... a little tired. Let's return to the main chamber. I wish to summon."

"Now?" Auron repeated with a note of concern. "Do you think that's wise in your condition?"

Braska shook Auron's arm off and gripped his staff. "I have only one condition, Auron, and that is my status as a Summoner. If I cannot perform my duty, then we should abandon this Pilgrimage here and now." He let out a shaky breath when he was done, and the room fell silent.

It was strange to see Auron expressing so much concern for Braska's welfare, when Auron was usually the one who drove the group to its limits. Rikku was starting to understand where his older incarnation's attitude had come from, though.

For all of Braska's gentle mannerisms, there was something hard and flinty underneath his kind smile; the same stubborn determination that pushed him to march out of the chamber on his own two feet, rather than relying on the help of his Guardians. He stopped to lean on his staff, and Auron's mouth thinned in silent disapproval, though he made no move to assist the other man.

Jecht was also watching the display with mild interest. " 'ey, Braska. You're tough, we get it. But even the best blitzers get winded sometimes. No shame in lettin' Auron over there help out, right?"

Braska stiffened, but didn't turn around -- either from pride, or more simple exhaustion. "It is not a matter of shame, Jecht." With that, he resumed his sedate pace towards the temple proper.

Auron frowned and trailed after the summoner, and Jecht let out a loud sigh. Then he glanced at Rikku speculatively.

"Oh no," Rikku said, shaking her head as she scooped the remains of their scattered Sphere Break game into her pouch. "What makes you think I could do any better at convincing Braska that he needs help than Auron? They're like best friends already!"

"Auron don't have boobs," Jecht replied, and Rikku rolled her eyes.

"Jecht, not every man's world revolves around ogling women," she snapped.

"Maybe so. But you don't got a choice, Rikkma," he drawled in response, folding his arms. "I won Braska a kiss, didn't I? So you have to do it. And I say you do it right now."

Rikku's mouth flapped open and closed for a few moments, but Jecht's somber expression remained fixed. "B-but... but... I'm not going to kiss Braska right in front of Auron! Are you trying to help me out here or shoot my non-relationship in the foot before it even starts?"

Jecht sighed. "Listen, I can handle Auron. I'll tell him about our game. Either he'll understand, or he'll be too busy beatin' the crap outta me to notice you lockin' lips with Braska."

Rikku closed her eyes and rubbed the crease that was forming on her forehead. "Jecht! That's not the point!" She glared at him and spoke very slowly, just in case his ears were as stuffed as his head seemed to be. "I. Do not. Want to kiss. Braska."

"Oh, 'cause you look like his wife, right?" Jecht drawled.

Rikku's flush deepened. "It's not that! Well, it is, kinda, but not how you think!" She smacked her palm into her forehead and groaned. "Why am I even having this conversation with you, Jecht? I'm not going to kiss Braska right now!"

Jecht stalked after the others, for once trying to keep his voice moderated as they caught up to Braska and Auron. "I didn't say you have to kiss him full on the lips. All you gotta do is go up there and help him out."

"He doesn't want to be helped," Rikku replied. If a tired Braska was anything like a tired Yuna on a bad day, she didn't want to be caught in the crossfire. "If you like the idea so much, go on up there and kiss him yourself!"

Jecht snorted. "Fine. You wanna play it hard, we can play it hard. If you don't go up there and talk Braska outta his fool idea, then you do have to kiss him. On the lips, with yer tongue, in front of your boyfriend, right now. Or I'll tell Braska all 'bout how you tried to blow him up earlier."

Rikku blinked. "Wait. Blow him up? When did I ever try to blow Braska...?" she trailed off, already regretting her word choice in the face of Jecht's guffaws. For the second time she felt herself gaping like a fish out of water. "That's -- that's blackmail!" she yelped, and gave Jecht a deadly glare to which he only grinned in reply.

"Stop him from summonin', or kiss him. Your choice."

"Some choice," Rikku said under her breath as she darted past him. She winced as she brushed past Auron. He's not gonna like this one bit.

"Rikkma?" Auron asked. "Lord Braska doesn't wish to be bothered right now, as I'm sure you heard." He peered at her. "By that look on your face I can tell that you're planning something. Whatever it is, don't."

"Umm... no can do," Rikku answered. Jecht coughed behind her. "If anything... weird... happens, it's all Jecht's fault. So don't get mad, okay?"

"Weird?" Auron repeated, but Rikku ignored him and continued until she was abreast of Braska. She threw herself in front of him and walked backwards, trying to catch his eye.

"Rikkma. As much as I appreciate your carefree spirit, this isn't the best time for your games," Braska told her. "Please step aside."

"I'm not playing a game," Rikku replied. She watched him trip over some icy rubble strewn across the floor, and made up her mind. Maybe Jecht was right... Braska's being more stubborn than an angry chocobo. She situated herself at Braska's side, mirroring the position Auron had attempted to take earlier and looping one of his arms over her shoulders. "I'm going to drag you straight to a bed whether you like it or not."

Braska tensed beside her, but didn't pull away immediately. "As tempting as that offer sounds, Rikkma, I am afraid I must refuse. Besides... do you not wish to see the new aeon as well?"

Rikku rolled her eyes. Been there, done that seemed like the wrong answer to give. Instead, she settled for an exaggerated sigh. "So it's all about showing off, huh? Well, mister hot-shot, I think you've been hanging around Jecht too long. You don't have to prove anything to us, you know. You're a Summoner already, for cripe's sake! Take it slow! You don't have to save the world in one day."

Braska chuckled. "I thought you would be pleased to see the creator of Macalania's forests," he said. "I can feel her presence in my mind. She is very beautiful, I am certain of it."

"I bet," Rikku mumbled uncomfortably. Pausing, she separated herself from Braska long enough to push open the heavy double doors that sealed the entrance of the Cloister off from the main hall. As she made her way back, she caught Auron's eye. Was he going to be jealous? Was there even anything for him to be jealous of, after that conversation they had in the Cloister of Trials? The nervous butterflies in her stomach died down as Auron gave her an imperceptible nod of approval, and she propped Braska against her side once more.

"I see my Guardians are conspiring against me," Braska noted, allowing himself to be led out. "While I am pleased to see the three of you working together so well, I wish it was not at my expense."

Rikku clucked her tongue in annoyance. "We're not conspiring against you. We're guarding you, since you aren't guarding yourself." She tugged him towards one of the adjacent resting rooms, prepared especially for the visiting summoner parties, but stopped when she felt Braska lean away from her.

"Tell me... why did you think you would have any more success at dissuading me than Auron?" Braska asked.

"Because I'm a girl?" Rikku hedged, trying to tug him towards the chamber once more. Jecht is so dead, she thought to herself.

Auron stepped into view, "Is there a problem?"

"None," Braska replied blandly, extracting his arm from Rikku's iron grip with a brief look of warning. "I just need a moment to gather myself before I summon."

"Really, now?" Jecht's voice was a little too loud, breaking the hushed silence of the temple as he strolled towards them. "And here I thought you were gonna take a break." He grinned toothily at Rikku, who cringed.

"Braska -- " she mumbled. To her surprise, he turned towards her with a look of weary understanding.

"Rikkma, I truly appreciate the concern you and the others are showing for my well-being. But I am not doing this to show off. I must summon this aeon. I must prove that I am strong enough to defeat Sin for myself." He gave her a faint smile. "It is a test, and the duty of every Summoner. I cannot back away, and I cannot fail."

Rikku sighed and dropped her head. She knew the look in his eyes; no matter what Jecht thought she could do, nothing was going to stop Braska. Nothing short of his own death, if that was what it took. "... do you want another potion?" she asked.

"I must succeed on my own," he answered, holding out his staff. "Please, tell the others to get back."

Rikku worried her lip. "Aren't you scared that you'll hurt yourself?" she tried one last time.

Braska tilted his head, one of his trademark half-smiles gracing his features. He looked fragile in that moment, more like a life-sized porcelain doll rather than a man. But his voice was steady when he spoke.

"Of course I am worried. Believe me, it is not a lack of fear that drives me to do this now. But there are things which I believe in that are greater than the sum of my own fears. Things that we all must believe in. A world of peace. A world free of Sin. Such a world, brought forth by the Summoner's sacrifice." He gave her a measured look. "I know you understand, Rikkma."

She knew a lost cause when she heard one. With a slight nod, she moved away from Braska, giving him the space he would need to dance. So stubborn, she thought to herself. Then, hesitating, she darted forward. "Wait! At least let me give you this," she said. Ignoring Braska's surprised expression, she leaned in and planted a gentle kiss on his cheek. "For luck," she explained as he stared.

After a moment of hesitation, he returned her smile and gave her a slight nod. "Thank you."

Rikku turned away from him and jogged over to Auron and Jecht, motioning them to move back. "I couldn't stop him," she explained. "He's still going to summon her." Her shoulders drooped. "I'm sorry," she mumbled to them under her breath.

"I can't believe you really did it! You kissed him!" Jecht exclaimed. "Oww!" he added when Rikku punched him in the arm.

Auron's expression was closed; he was in his Ignore Jecht mode again, eyes trained on Braska.

"You and your stupid bets," Rikku mumbled, turning around to watch the show.

Braska had already begun the summoning dance; if his steps were a little slower than usual, or his movements less graceful, no one commented on it. Indeed, there was nothing to be said as the swirl of magic surrounded him, spiralling around the staff in his hand and lifting upwards in a spray of color. The tinkling of crystal became louder; the first few shards of ice fell from the ceiling. Massive chunks of it exploded out of the floor, and then silence reigned as the silvery, almost-liquid form of the aeon descended from above.

"Whoa," Jecht breathed, his eyes wide as Shiva formed, blasting away her prison of ice with an air of haughty disregard. Even Auron seemed speechless for the moment, enraptured by the large aeon's beauty.

Rikku drank in the sight of the much-missed aeon. Shiva had always reminded her very much of Lulu - besides the obvious parallel of being ridiculously stacked, both were also calm, cool and put together -- what was, in Rikku's mind, the perfect ideal of feminine beauty. She let out a tiny sigh of content, then stiffened as the summon turned to regard the source of the disturbance in the otherwise silent temple. More correctly, to regard her.

Rikku couldn't notice anything but the aeon as she stared at her, Shiva's delicate features giving her look an eerily almost-human quality. The gaze sent a chilled jolt through Rikku's body and she wrapped her arms around herself. No -- Shiva wasn't anything like Lulu, Rikku amended. Lulu, for her frosty exterior, still had compassion and feelings for others, the basics of what made a person human. Shiva was, all puns aside, much more transparent. She was the incarnation of ruthlessness, the remains of a consciousness that had shed every last ounce of humanity in order to transform herself into the perfect machine.

As if she could hear Rikku's thoughts, Shiva smirked. Her eyes remained cold and unforgiving, her gaze unblinking. You do not belong here, the aeon seemed to say, though she didn't appear to be surprised.

Suddenly, Rikku knew. She knew with a terrifying, absolute certainty, that this was how it would be for the rest of the Pilgrimage. No amount of planning, of clawing or scraping to gain access to the inner sanctum of a temple would change her situation. Shiva tilted her head as if satisfied, and with a toss of one thick braid, leapt away, disintegrating into graceful swirls of pyreflies. Rikku didn't notice, her throat dry and her eyes wide.

They won't help you. You chose this, her inner voice supplied in the face of her mute shock.

Give up, her thoughts whispered traitorously. Forget the Rikku you were, and become the Rikkma of this era. There's no going back anyway. The small whimper stuck in Rikku's throat. She was here, in this past, unstuck in time forever or until she died - which would happen pretty soon, if Braska completed his Pilgrimage as he said he would. It'd be easier to forget anyway... to pretend that this is your second chance, your time to be with Auron. Just let go, isn't that what Auron himself told you to do?

Rikku clenched her fists at her side. Give up? Just like that? She shook her head, breaking out of the trance she had been thrust into on seeing ice maiden. So what if Ixion or Ifrit wouldn't help her? Heck, if she paid Yojimbo enough money he'd probably open the gates of time for her personally. And if that wasn't an option, there was always Valefor. Yeah, Valefor, Rikku thought to herself with an increasing amount of hope. Valefor was gentler than any of the other summons she had ever remembered meeting; the aeon had shared a unique bond with Yuna, and it had even comforted Tidus during his time of need. If there was Fayth that could possibly be called compassionate, it would have to be the winged wonder of Besaid.

With that bit of rationalization, Rikku's sudden wave of panic subsided. She stubbornly refused to think of what would happen if her plan didn't work -- she couldn't abandon hope. My story is not going to end in the past! Another thought struck her, and Rikku stifled a groan. Wait a second -- Besaid is all the way on the other side of the world! Valefor is going to be the last aeon Braska picks up on this trip! "Great," she breathed aloud.

"That's the understatement of the year," Jecht piped in, recovering from his own shock. "Why didn'tcha tell me those aeons could be babes? That thing had legs all the way up to her neck!" He let out a low, appreciative whistle, and both Auron and Rikku winced.

"Don't be disgusting, Jecht." Rikku growled. "Shiva isn't even human!"

"She got it where it counts," Jecht replied with a lecherous grin. Ignoring the incredulous stares of his companions, he sauntered towards Braska. "Hey man, nice job! You look beat. I think you earned a rest, huh?"

"Indeed," Braska replied, this time leaning easily into the proffered arm. "Thank you -- all of you -- for fulfilling your own duties, so that I could fulfill mine." His eyes lingered on Rikku, and with a sinking feeling, she wondered if the impulsive kiss she had given him had been a mistake. A quick glance over her shoulder at Auron stilled those fears, even as a new set was raised.

Auron, too, was looking at her, and she realized with a jolt that he had seen. He'd seen Shiva staring right at her! She opened her mouth, scrabbling for an explanation, and then closed it as she caught sight of Braska.

He was dead on his feet, the last of his strength robbed by the summoning, and an unfamiliar feeling surged through her and quashed her uneasiness. Whatever it was that passed between Shiva and herself had to wait; Braska needed her help now. Some things were just more important. "Things which I believe in that are greater than the sum of my fears," Braska had told her.

I'm not going home, not anytime soon. I'm a Guardian again. She straightened her shoulders and smiled at Braska. Auron's questions had to wait -- they had a job to do first, and a few frosty looks from an aeon wouldn't change that.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

18: Uncertain

"We need to talk."

Rikku swallowed and squirmed in her seat by the campfire. She'd been expecting those words for quite some time now. The trip out of Macalania's frozen cliffs had been uneventful and cold. Conversation was sparse -- unlike the fiend battles they were challenged by. But with Braska determined to flex his summoning muscles, at the least the journey was easier; he wanted to master Shiva's frosty power while the aeon was still in her home element. Rikku didn't mind; it gave her that much more time to concentrate on salvaging their dismal supply situation -- something that hadn't been aided by her previous gil-tossing effort.

Auron remained reticent for the entire hike, but Rikku could feel he was brooding over something.

Jecht's increasingly erratic behavior wasn't helping, either -- in place of his usual tension-breaking jokes, a surly temper was growing instead. He was reminding her less and less of the childish yet endearing boor she'd come to know and more of the arrogant, careless stranger Tidus had described to them. If that wasn't enough, his fighting was in a worse state than ever -- Rikku swore that she could see his hands shake when he gripped his sword. It was lucky for everyone that Braska was eager to pick up the slack with his aeon, but Rikku wondered what would happen once they left the icy planes and training would no longer be Braska's priority.

It wasn't a pleasant mix of tensions to travel with -- the atmosphere was strained, with pressure building on every side. Rikku expected things to boil over as soon as they made camp, but instead, both Jecht and Braska had bundled themselves straight off to bed. And now, Auron had finally broken the tense silence as they watched the others sleep.

She glanced at him, wondering if this was going to be "the big kablooie." Couldn't he have picked on Jecht? Gathering her resolve, she stopped fidgeting and met Auron's stare. I am a Guardian. I've faced Sin. I won't let anything scare me! Not even Auron's scary face!

"Talk? Do we need to, really?" Rikku blurted out.

Or, okay, maybe I can deal with the big kablooie on another day. Auron's scary face wins!

Auron gave her a simple, knowing look. One of those looks, the ones that told her he wasn't going to let her shake him off. She drew another point for him on her mental scorecard and rolled her eyes. It's completely unfair. That man could move mountains with the twitch of an eyebrow.

"Alright, Mister Eyebrow of Doom. We can talk now if you insist." Rikku scrunched her nose at him in defeat.

"Thank you," Auron replied, his voice so dry Rikku was sure he could have cured jerky by breathing into the bag of rations he carried. "I think the problem to discuss is obvious."

Rikku sucked in her breath. Busted! "Okay, yeah." Breathe, Rikku!

"About that aeon thing. I can totally explain! I know you hate it when I keep secrets, and I guess this is the mother them all, but I can't just tell you. I mean, maybe I can, but I think you'd better your sword away -- come on, Braska's been all lemmie-at-em! all day, I don't think there are any fiends left out here to jump us. And I mean it, stop polishing that thing and put it away, otherwise you might accidentally impale yourself, or something, and then -- hey, actually, I don't know if that would really change anything! But it would be all gross and nasty and I'd have to sphere change just to heal you because Jecht just drank our last hi-potion -- without asking, I might add, and you know what he said to me after he did it? He said I don't feel high at all, can you believe that jerk? And anyway -- uh, hello, are you even listening to me?"

She trailed off as she noticed the look Auron was directing at her. This one was a different look now, one of the ones he tended to fire off at Jecht. It was the incredulous one, with the quirked lip, asking how stupid are you?

"Huh? What, what'd I say?"

Auron shook his head, pinching his brow in annoyance and muttering something under his breath that sounded a bit like I can't believe she talks that much but could have just as well been I can't believe we didn't have brunch. Which was a point -- they were almost out of food, and everybody was ready for a hot meal and something other than dried meat to chew on. Yeah, it was definitely the food problem that was giving him trouble concentrating on their conversation, Rikku decided.

"Not about that," Auron said, looking up. "Does everything in your perception always revolve around you?"

"It does when I'm talking about our supplies!" Rikku answered defensively. "Since I'm only holding all of them! In one small pouch!"

"I'm aware of the situation," Auron told her. "But I want you to forget for a moment about the food, the money, and whatever it is you're trying to hide from me this time and focus on something much more immediate. Do you think you could manage that just this once?"

Rikku stared. "You don't want to talk to me about money, and you're not going to interrogate me about the aeon?" She frowned and peered at him with suspicion. "Are you feeling okay?"

"I'm fine," Auron replied with faint amusement. The smirk dropped from his face and his expression turned serious. "I'm not here to ask you about what you obviously don't want to tell me."

The shock was enough to snap Rikku's mouth shut, followed by a momentary feeling of shame -- mostly because of the relief she felt on hearing that she wasn't Auron's problem this time. It probably wouldn't last, but for the moment it was a bullet dodged.

But... if he didn't want to talk to her about that, then why approach in the first place? "So... umm, what's up?"

Auron turned his gaze to one of the occupied bedrolls across the glowing embers of the dying fire. "Has Jecht been acting strangely around you of late?" he asked in a low undertone.

Rikku followed his glance, landing on Jecht. The suspect was snoring, as usual. As they watched, he rolled over and smacked his lips together a few times, before scratching an armpit and resuming his evening serenade, completely unperturbed.

Rikku winced. "Jecht always acts strange," she pointed out, earning a brief smile from Auron. It soon dropped, however, and Rikku sighed and wrapped her arms around her legs, rocking herself to and fro. She'd tried to avoid this -- considering how straight-laced Auron was, it was a wonder he'd kept this to himself for so long. "But I think I know what you mean."

Auron's face settled into a more typical frown, though it lacked his usual fierceness. "Jecht is suffering from the drinking sickness. He'll put us all in danger, one way or the other, whether he finds a new source or tries to free himself of it. I had my suspicions, but Jecht should have mentioned it was this severe." Auron's frown deepened. "This is not how we should have found out." That it was exactly the wrong place and time was left unsaid.

Rikku lowered her chin onto her knees and stared at the burned remains of the detritus they'd scrapped together for fuel. "We all know Jecht has a room temperature IQ, and we've just been to Macalania." Idly, she flicked a hand out and reignited coals with a small burst of Fire magic. Jecht's snoring continued unabated. "I bet he doesn't realize how sick he really is."

Auron nodded in agreement. "So far it hasn't been a problem. But Braska is becoming accustomed to the new aeon, as well as the rigors of the Pilgrimage. He'll notice - if he hasn't already."

"Let's hope not," Rikku said, her eyes flicking from Jecht's bedroll to Braska's.

Their summoner was sleeping opposite of Jecht. The two had a strange symmetry, being a study in contrasts even at rest. Jecht was a mess, sprawled over the crumpled remains of his blanket, while Braska lay motionless on his bedroll, so still and pale that he could be mistaken for dead, if not for the gentle rise and fall of his chest. Exhaustion kept Braska still, lost in the deepest of sleeps as he gathered his magical strength for the next day's journey.

Rikku's hand travelled to her lips, recalling the fleeting kiss she had planted on Braska's cheek. She blushed when she realized Auron was watching her, and redirected her gaze elsewhere. "Braska's been practicing pretty hard with Shiva, huh. I think he's getting better at this summoning stuff."

Auron said nothing for a while, and Rikku shuffled her feet. "You... umm. You don't want to ask me about what happened in the temple, do you?" she ventured. Seeing Auron's complete lack of response emboldened her. "Not even a little curious?" she added, her nervousness being replaced by indignation. Is he ignoring me?

Auron shrugged. "It isn't my place to ask you anything." He wasn't looking at her, but his gaze lost a bit of its usual intensity as a smile pulled at the corners of his lips. "I think I've finally realized that," he admitted after a moment. "I am neither your keeper, nor Lord Braska's. All this time I've tried my best to protect him, but I think..." He trailed off, staring into the fire's remains. "Perhaps I've been... overzealous. He's earned the right to do what he wants -- or what he feels is best. So have you."

He looked at her, then, his eyes shadowed. "You see someone important to you, someone you've lost, when you see me." Shaking his head when Rikku opened her mouth to protest, he continued speaking. "I am neither blind nor stupid, Rikku. I accept that you, too, have suffered from Sin, just as we all have. It's easy to forget that around you and Jecht... you're both so different from us." He studied Braska. "Braska does the same. He sees his wife in you -- he can't help himself." Auron's expression turned grim. "Braska has already sacrificed too much. If… your attentions make this Pilgrimage easier for him to endure, then I won't stand in his way. He deserves to know comfort and companionship on this, his final journey."

Rikku's heart dropped like a stone -- the way Auron put it so bluntly, Braska's final journey, brought the inevitable conclusion of the Pilgrimage to the forefront, reminding her of what was in store for them all if they succeeded. When we succeed, Rikku corrected herself. It has to be when. She started as Auron continued speaking, feeling her breath hitch. Hold on -- is he saying what I think he's saying?

"And I know now, Rikku, that you won't hurt him. You... may return his affections, if you wish. I won't interfere."

"It's not Braska's affections I want!" Rikku felt as though she had been punched in the gut; not enough air was making the journey into her lungs for proper speech. She glared at Auron. "This could be the last journey for all of us! What are you, some kind of martyr? Don't you think you deserve a little happiness too?"

Auron faced her. "From you?"

For one a heart-stopping moment, Rikku felt despair. The tone of his rhetorical question was leaden and uninviting, clearly spelling out REJECTION, sending her thoughts into a tailspin. He doesn't feel anything for me? No... we're friends... I'm his friend! But nothing else? Then this... this journey I was sent on... all that pain I felt when he left... it was all for nothing? "W-would that be so bad?" she managed to reply.

Auron sighed; his iron mask slipped a little as something flickered behind his eyes, and suddenly Rikku found she could breathe again. She resisted the urge to sock him in the shoulder for scaring her so much, figuring it would kill the mood of the moment they were sharing. If you could call his avoidance of her and the fact that he had just practically shoved her at Braska a moment at all.

"You're a very pretty girl," Auron admitted. "Even for an Al Bhed."

Rikku felt her cheeks turn pink a moment before her mouth dropped open. As expected, Auron's dubious compliments were a double-edged sword. "Gee, thanks," she deadpanned. "I guess you aren't half-bad for a Bevellian, either." She waited to hear the real words, whatever it was he was trying to tell her.

"I know you believe you're attracted to me. You're a very poor actress and you wear your emotions on your sleeve." He chuckled. "At first, it offended me, but now..." His smiled faded, and his stare was so heavy Rikku felt a chill run down her spine. She wet her lips nervously, and was surprised when he looked away first.

"... things have been changing between us. Between all of us." There was a tense, but not entirely uncomfortable pause, and Auron gave her a significant look. "You no longer disgust me, in any case."

Rikku rolled her eyes. "Oh, you flatterer," she drawled, turning away from him to hide her face. "Maybe you should get some pointers from Braska. At least he knows how to make a girl feel welcome." She squeaked in surprise when Auron's hands gripped her forearms to twist her back around. He seemed upset -- but not with her for once.

"You are a puzzle," he breathed, lowering his face towards hers. He looked conflicted, as though he was struggling to come to terms with her presence before him, even though he was the one holding her still. Rikku blinked, unable to do anything but stare as her heart beat a staccato rhythm.

"Trying to unearth your secrets is... tempting," he murmured, his eyes roving over her face, as if he was looking at her for the first time. The most he'd ever said about her appearance was that she bore an uncanny similarity to her aunt Raenn; maybe he was trying to take his own advice.

Rikku was not feeling quite as adventurous -- searching his face seemed like a moot point when his lips were that close to her own. It was hard enough trying to resist her own urge to lean in and test them. Were they as soft as they looked? Auron's mouth was moving, but his words were being drowned out by her own heartbeat.

"But - what you feel, Rikku..." His grip loosened.

Kiss! Rikku thought hazily.

"Who you see... that man is not me."

Kiss me now, you idiot! she railed, still zeroed in on his lips.

"And I cannot... no. Will not be him."

Something clicked as his lips drifted away. Still not kissed! her mind screamed, preparing to take over and drag Auron down to extract satisfaction whether he wanted to kiss her or not, consequences be damned. She gained control over herself before the "conversation" turned into a wrestling match and tried to sway him with a little good old-fashioned Rikku-style logic.

"Well, we could still... um... hang out together, right? Like we're doing right now?" Except closer. Like, say, if you were holding me on your lap instead of on this stupid stone, her mind supplied. "You could just be yourself! Honest!"

Auron's fingers flexed against her forearms. His eyes were so dark -- she hadn't had the opportunity to see them this close since he had first stared her in the face all those years ago. Why in Shiva's name hadn't she realized how beautiful they were? A heavy sense of anticipation filled her, and she leaned forward, letting her own fall shut as she puckered her lips.

"I can't do that, Rikku."

That was not a kiss. Rikku's eyes flew open. She voiced the first, immediate thought that came to mind. "Why not?"

Auron sighed, though he didn't release her -- which she noted with glee. "You asked if I wanted to know why you kissed Braska. I think you should ask yourself that question first."

Rikku twisted out of Auron's grasp. So he was jealous! With a great amount of effort, she ignored the urge to celebrate. "But that was because of Jecht! Him and his stupid bet! That wasn't my fault!"

Auron sat back, his expression closing. "Jecht may have many flaws, but intentionally wounding Braska isn't one of them. And no -" he added with a quick look, "I don't believe that's your intent, either. But what you gave Braska was more than a simple kiss. Surely you understand that."

Rikku sat back, stumped. No, she didn't understand that. More than a kiss? "Back up there! What do you mean? That was just an innocent peck on the cheek!"

The hard stare Auron gave her made Rikku want to disappear into her boots.

"What? It was just a stupid bet! It didn't mean anything!"

"You gave him hope, Rikku. Something you wouldn't have done if you had no feelings for him, no matter which inane games you play with Jecht."

"Of course I have feelings for Braska!" Rikku sputtered. "He's my un... uhh, he's family! I love him! Just not the way you think I do."

The conflicted, vulnerable Auron she'd witnessed moments before was disappearing behind his wall of granite, though his eyes remained locked on her own. "I was Braska's companion long before you even knew of him." He paused to regard Braska. "Lord Braska is not your brother in blood. He's well within his right to pursue you -- if that's what you both wish."

"No way! That's not what I want!" Rikku felt herself turn colder than Shiva at Auron's mention of her "brother." That's who Auron thought she was? Raenn's sister? Technically, what Auron said was true -- she wasn't related to Braska by blood. The only problem was that Auron was dead wrong -- and besides, Braska was Yuna's father. Friends didn't jump other friends' dads -- that was just gross.

"I don't like him! I like you! Even Jecht knows that!" Rikku pinned Auron under a challenging stare, ignoring her own gut reaction to turn around and run away while squealing in the highest pitch possible. I can't believe I just said that. Goodbye, dignity! Hello, embarrassment! Well... what's done is done. Second-guessing herself was a sure-fire way to guarantee a loss in her stare-down war with Auron. "I think you've started to like me, too. So what's the problem here? Am I not good enough for you?"

Auron grimaced, startled by her accusation. "Don't try to make this an issue of race, Rikku. Or have you already forgotten your own prejudice? Maybe you should don that magic armor of yours if you need a reminder."

"Is that what you really want right now, huh?"

Auron sighed. "That wasn't -- Rikku," he tried again, rubbing a hand over his face in an oddly familiar gesture - one that had stuck with the older Auron over the years. "I don't know what you want. But what I'm trying to explain is that you don't know, either."

Rikku grit her teeth. "Hey! I know exactly what -- no, who -- I want! Stop putting words in my mouth!" She bit off the sentence before she could tack on a "and try your tongue instead," but Auron still gave her a knowing stare.

What am I missing here? Rikku thought. Her confusion must have shown, because Auron answered her question without any prompting.

"There is much more to a relationship than physical attraction," Auron told her. "What you think you feel, what you see in me -- and yes, even what I feel -- that isn't enough. It's not enough for me, it wouldn't be enough for you and it's certainly not enough to force onto Braska. There are no fairy-tale romances in Spira, Rikku."

"Leave Braska out of this!" So what if he was right -- maybe there weren't any happy endings in this Spira, this past, foreign world of his. That didn't mean that she wasn't going to try. "This is between you and me right now."

"Look, I don't know what happened in your clan, or why you're exiled," Auron said. "But I can tell you that Braska is a good man, despite what you may have been told to believe. You don't have to feel shame or disgrace for returning his feelings. You don't have to run away from him."

Rikku studied Braska, still sleeping and unaware of their late night discussion and his own role in it. "Auron, you don't know what you're talking about," Rikku began, but he cut her off.

"You're a liar, Rikkma," he told her. "You've lied about your past. You've lied about your feelings for me. Now you're lying to yourself about your feelings for Braska as well. You've lied so much that I wonder if you even know truth anymore." His words were harsh, but his tone was not full of censure, as she would have expected. "You know what he sees in you, yet you continue to encourage him -- with your smiles, your touches, your kind words and now even a kiss. You're not cruel, Rikku. But you are naive."

He's wrong. Auron's wrong. Rikku tore her eyes away from Braska. "You mean I should push him away then? Be mean to him so he won't get his hopes up? Tell him a dramatic story about how it's not meant to be over a campfire?" She shook her head, braids and beads slapping into her face and stinging her cheeks. "Just like you right now. Well you know what I think? I think you're using Braska as an excuse. You're just afraid of me, yeah!" Rikku huffed and waited for his reply. The silence loomed, but she hunched her shoulders and refused to give up. She could wait forever for this answer.

A dry laugh, unexpected, broke the tense silence. "Maybe you're right," Auron admitted. "I am pushing you away. But you know why. I don't want to be someone else for you." His eyes lost their amusement when he looked up again. "I don't know what I feel, but at least I know what I don't want." He fell quiet, his own challenge still unyielding.

Rikku flushed and peered at Braska. She won the battle... sorta. Auron's answer was as raw and honest as it could get, she couldn't deny that. But it still didn't change anything. Well I know that I don't want to be Raenn. Maybe I do need to start being meaner to Braska. Just because he has it hard doesn't mean I should be leading him on.

Braska sighed and shifted, rolling to his side. The glimpse of his face she caught was contorted with the remnants of some bad dream, but it passed as quickly as it came, and his features soon returned to their slack, unguarded state. Yuna had suffered from those dreams too, Rikku recalled, after she started collecting aeons.

"They say summoning changes a person," she remarked, feeling an urge to move to Braska's side and rest her hand against his forehead, to try and soothe away the worries and the dreams that she knew were plaguing him. But instead she caught herself and scowled at Auron. "You think showing someone a little compassion is a sign of being in love? You know, you're pretty messed up, Auron. I don't want to know what your family was like."

"Compassion," Auron echoed, a humorless smile back in place. "Is that what you call this. Hnn," he added, looking away.

The conversation died out, and though they were sitting right next to each other Rikku felt tired and alone. Auron's words bothered her -- but not as much as they should have. All things considered, he didn't seem very upset with her either, despite their obvious disagreement. Most of all, though, Rikku was surprised that she wasn't angrier at his accusations of her own supposed feelings for Braska.

Well, it's because I do love Braska, she reasoned. Just in a different way. I thought he could understand that.

"I'm sorry for treating you like somebody else. Someone you're not," Rikku said. "You were right about that. But -- " She took a deep breath. "I'm willing to do what it takes to prove that I really like you. You, Auron. Not someone who looks like you. Not just my memories."

Auron glanced at her warily. "Don't try to kiss me," he said with a faint look of alarm.

Rikku rolled her eyes. "Hey, how'd you know I was even thinking -- oh, forget it! Besides, I didn't win the part of the bet where I got to kiss you anyway, not that you'd believe that." She shrugged. "But I do want something from you, to show you that I'm serious. At least give me the chance to change your mind," she pressed.

"Something," Auron repeated after a short, thoughtful pause. "You've already taken my sword, my bracer, and all of my money. What more do you want?"

Rikku grin reappeared as the atmosphere relaxed between them. A glint entered her eye, and Auron grimaced as he followed her gaze.

"Stop right there!" Auron shut her down with a look of panic before she could reach his belt buckle.

"Aww, c'mon! Then at least gimmie your coat! I won't damage it, I swear!"

After the ensuing brief but quiet struggle, Rikku managed to wrest the coat off of him and gather it in her lap. He'd let her win to keep from waking Braska and Jecht, but she wasn't going to quibble over the details. A win was a win, fair or not. "See?" she whispered. "You do like me!"

"I didn't want to disturb the others with your incessant scheming," Auron grumbled, crossing his arms. Which, without the bulky fabric of his coat sleeves to hide them in, were laid bare to the world in all of their muscular glory.

Holy moley, he's hot, Rikku reminded herself, biting her lip and trying not to stare. Auron cleared his throat with a smug look, and Rikku blanched and scowled half-heartedly at him. She couldn't hold the frown, however, just gave up trying as she delved into the coat, running her fingers over the fabric. A thousand ideas raced through her head. She settled on the least offensive one, abandoning the cloth to dig through her supply pouch.

"I'm gonna put a little Rikku-certified chic into this thing, mister. I mean, red is such a total fashion mistake, if you ask me. It makes you look fat. It could make anybody with abs of steel and a skin-tight bodysuit look fat. Just look at Nooj! ...never mind about that last part."

She chattered away as she worked, grabbing her soldering iron and a few scraps of metal out of the bag. Gathering together everything she needed, Rikku began tooling the shoulder-guard of the coat.

"If you're gonna go flamboyant, then do it with a little bit of style. You should wear your coat off the shoulder or something. Y'know, one arm in, one arm out. It'll look fantastic on you!" She snuck a calculating glance at Auron's biceps. "And this should help a little with the protection too," Rikku added, ducking back as a few sparks flew from the tips of the metal she was working. "Everything could use a little of that good ol' Al Bhed flair!" Finishing up -- it was primarily a decorative modification, after all -- Rikku blew on the still-glowing shoulder guard and then held up the fabric to display her handiwork to Auron. "Well, what do you think?"

Silence.

Rikku scowled. "What, don't you like it?"

"You... have taken the traditional uniform of Yevon's warrior monks and decorated it with an Al Bhed design," Auron observed. He tilted his head and narrowed his eyes at her. "Do you take pleasure in insulting the Church at every turn?"

Rikku didn't have to think about that one. "Well, yeah, actually, I guess I do. But this time it's just a neat little bonus."

"A bonus to what...?" Auron trailed off, reaching for the coat.

Rikku frowned. "Oh, stop being so sarcastic," she said to him, refusing to relinquish the cloth. There was no way she was going to give this to him if he was going to make fun of it, or worse yet, insult it. "I just wanted to give you a little piece of me. You know," she added, feeling more and more embarrassed by the second. "Something that will last -- you can take it with you, no matter where you go."

Her voice faltered, and the coat slipped through her fingers as a faint sense of panic bloomed. Did I reach too far? Maybe he really doesn't like it. He said it was a uniform? Oh, great, don't tell me Auron gets hung up on things like that... Rikku closed her eyes and stifled her groan. And here she'd been trying to help ease the tension between them, for crying out loud!

A sudden, unexpected pressure on her hands caused Rikku's eyes to fly open. Auron's larger, pale fingers slid over her own, tracing the designs on the warmed metal in her grasp.

"I am... honored. Thank you, Rikku," he murmured, more gently than she had ever heard him speak. "I will wear it with pride." Catching himself, he withdrew his fingers and frowned. "Lord Braska will be pleased to see it, of course."

Rikku smiled at Auron and pulled the coat out of his grasp, swatting his hands away. "Wait, there's one last thing I want to do to it." She dove back into her supply pouch, searching for something that would better reflect her feelings for him. When her hand finally closed around one of their few, precious phoenix downs, Rikku felt her smile widen. "I know exactly what this needs," she murmured, drawing out the fluffy feather and one other, more familiar set of beads. She strung the feather around the looped thread and reached for his shoulder guard. A few sparks later, and the beaded hair-cord Yuna had made was dangling from the back of his coat, the small feather at its end twisting through the air. "There," Rikku sighed, blowing on the metal to cool it. "Now it's perfect."

"That is Besaid-style knotwork," Auron observed with interest. "Those are very rare and expensive to obtain. You've been to Besaid before?" He sounded surprised.

"I knew someone from there once," Rikku explained, pleased with her work.

"Thank you," Auron repeated dubiously. "But... why this, and the feather? I can hardly wait to hear what Jecht will say about it."

Rikku stuck out her tongue. "Oh, come on. You're man enough to wear Besaid hair-braids, right? Besides, with arms like those and that sword, nobody will laugh at you. Just keep one out there for everyone to see and people will be too busy looking at your guns to notice the feather anyhow."

"Hnn," Auron grunted, but he did stand up and slip the coat on. "I'll keep that in mind." Though he shrugged out of one sleeve, he continued to hide his arm from her view within the bulky coat. He looked down at her, one eyebrow quirked. "And does this meet with your approval, then? Or do I need to start wearing sunglasses next? Maybe a new hairstyle?" he suggested.

Rikku smiled, planting her chin in one hand. "Naw. I think you're good the way you are right now."

Footnotes
Rikku's coat modification turns Auron's normal red coat into his Kingdom Hearts outfit.

When Rikku says "your guns" to Auron, she means his biceps. *I know, I probably don't have to explain this to the SB forum...

After I wrote this chapter, someone explained to me that the tradition of leaving one arm hanging out of the yukata was a sign of having suffered through some sort of dishonor. I ultimately decided not to port that aspect of Japanese culture over into this universe.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

19: Sheer Luck

"C'mon, man, gimmie a break!" Jecht's bellow echoed across the clearing. "I'm too tired to do this! I need a time-out!"

"The fiends will not be as accommodating as I am," came Auron's curt reply. There was the sound of clashing metal, and then --

"OWW! Damn it, Auron, I can't feel my wrists anymore!"

"That yell of pain tells me otherwise. Now take up your sword."

The short moment of silence that followed was soon punctuated by more grumbling. Then the sound of a scuffle filled the air once more. Rikku sighed and shook her head before risking a glance at Braska, who was tending to the remains of their makeshift camp. "Auron's being pretty tough on him, huh?" she observed.

Braska nodded, wrapping up his bedroll. "He may seem harsh, but Jecht has found himself a competent teacher." He paused. "Auron would not try quite so hard if Jecht did not show at least some promise."

There was another loud ring, and then more of Jecht's increasingly creative obscenities on Auron, his sword technique, his lineage and how the two meshed together filtered through.

"... Once he learns how to keep his grip on his sword," Braska added as an afterthought. Finishing with his bundle, he stood and shook out his robes. "But the lesson is over for today. It is time we moved on." Stooping down, he scooped Auron's pack from the ground and made his way over to the two swordsmen.

Rikku kicked at the ground before rolling to her feet. "I was afraid you were gonna say that," she mumbled, shouldering her pack. Grabbing Jecht's, she trailed after him. As she pulled alongside the three men, she tossed it toward Jecht, nearly hitting him in the face and earning more than a few of his colorful expletives.

Ignoring his insults, she addressed Braska. "Do you think we could at least wait until it stopped raining? Jecht does need more practice, after all." She was met by more swearing and ducked a half-hearted blow from the man in question.

"That storm never ends," Auron interrupted. "Unless you want to take up permanent residence in Macalania, it's time to move on."

"Yeah," agreed Jecht a bit too hastily. "We need to get back to civilization. Y'know, with people. And food. And bars," he trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck.

Braska smiled in sympathy. "While I can not say that I approve of the bars, I fear I must agree with Jecht. Djose Temple is our next destination, and to reach it we must cross the Thunder Plains."

"I know, I know," Rikku replied. "It's just... well, I don't really like thunder all that much." Stubbing a toe into the ground, she frowned. It had been a while since she'd overcome her crippling fear of thunder, but that didn't mean she enjoyed travelling through the Thunder Plains. In fact, the only instance she could recall appreciating any time spent there was during Yuna's concert -- and that was more due to the fact that the storm had actually broken, rather than the concert itself.

She looked up to see the others studying her. Well, Auron and Braska. Jecht looked smug, and too late she realized she'd given him ample ammunition to use for the rest of the Pilgrimage. Rolling her eyes, she stiffened her back in a show of bravery, planting her hands on her hips. "Whatever," she said with more confidence than she felt. "I won't slow us down."

Still, as the small group made their way to the edge of the wet, darkened fields of rock, Rikku found her feet slowing. Lightning flashed, and she jumped, barely stifling her squeak of dismay. Braska was busy explaining the quirks of the never-ending storms and lightning strikes to Jecht, who was listening with too-eager anticipation.

It figures, Rikku thought. Only someone like Jecht would be excited at the possibility of getting barbequed by a lightning bolt. There was another flash of light, followed by a loud crack of thunder. With a sense of foreboding, Rikku looked up, then leapt away as a sizzling bolt charred the ground at her feet. Scowling, she rolled off of her butt and inspected her now-thoroughly-soaked skirt. Then she shook a fist at the sky.

"Hey, aim at one of those taller guys over there!" She pointed at Jecht. "Just fry one of the guys carrying those lightning rods on their back and leave me alone!" The sky rumbled ominously in response, and Rikku groaned.

"Looks like you got all the luck, Blondie!" Jecht called out to her with a grin. He followed it up with a whoop as another blast of lightning struck a few feet away, causing her to cringe and jump once more.

Rikku growled at Jecht, but his comment had her fingering the Garment Grid. She looked at the new sphere she'd placed in it and wondered if it would work. Shinra wasn't there to fix it if anything went wrong, but then again -- she'd made this sphere herself, and she didn't really believe Jecht's personality would be a hostile one. Embarrassing, maybe, but not malicious.

Besides, Rikku thought to herself as she tapped the Sphere Break game she'd recorded, the worst it can do is not work, right? "Guys," she called out after a moment's consideration. "I'm gonna try something, okay? Don't freak out!"

Auron's eyebrows shot up. "Something?" he asked, a dark look clouding his features. "Define something."

Braska saw Rikku toying with her belt. "You are going to use your magic again," he observed. "But why?"

"Who cares why?" Jecht jumped in excitement -- avoiding another thunderbolt in the process. "C'mon, just do it already! I've been waitin' to see this since forever!"

Rikku rolled her eyes in exasperation. At least she could trust Jecht to make sphere changing seem like nothing more than a trip down one of Luca's fashion runways. Still somewhat nervous, she looked to Braska for approval, rather than jumping headlong into her plan. "It's a new sphere," she told him, sensing the dark look Auron was shooting her over Braska's shoulder. "I'm, umm, well, I'm not really sure what it'll do, but I don't think it'll hurt anybody. And," she added, seeing Auron shift his weight, "I think it'll even help us cross the Thunder Plains if it works."

Braska looked contemplative, then gave her a slow nod.

"My lord -- !" Auron protested, still not enamoured with the idea of Rikku changing into one of her costumes.

She frowned at him, then tempered the look with a guilty wince. In all honesty, Auron had yet to have a good experience with one of her "enhanced" personalities to date. Then she lifted her chin. Well, that's just going to have to change. She wasn't about to give up using one of the few advantages she had on this Pilgrimage just because it made Auron uncomfortable. In fact, she considered it suitable revenge for when he made her feel clumsy and awkward just by being his normal, competent, muscle-bound self. Which was pretty much always. She smirked and turned her attention back to Braska.

"Go ahead, Rikkma," Braska told her. "Your magic is a resource that none of us can afford to ignore at the moment." His tone was light, but in it were the underpinnings of a faint command; again, her fault. They were short on money and supplies, and Braska was making clear that no advantage, no matter how uncomfortable it might be for the group, was to be turned away.

"So what'cha gonna change into now, Blondie?" Jecht asked, missing the subtle undertones of the conversation in favour of ogling Rikku. "Tell me it's a blitzer!"

"It is, in a way," Rikku admitted, her hand hovering over the sphere belt. "It's you. Well, a recording I made of you." She tried valiantly to ignore how both Auron and Braska blanched at the news while Jecht let out another triumphant cheer.

"Ya know, there can be only one Sublimely Magnificent Jecht, but I really can't blame ya for trying," he crowed.

"I knew this was a bad idea," Auron muttered to Braska, whose calming smile was beginning to look strained. "How is this supposed to help us cross the Thunder Plains?" he added with more volume.

"Stop looking so glum, I'm on it too!" Rikku ignored the groan emanating from Auron and the tightening of Braska's smile and pushed on. "And it's not so much a recording of Jecht, but what he was doing."

Auron sighed and passed a hand over his eyes. "I find myself gushing with relief," he deadpanned. Then he shrugged and gripped his sword. "Perhaps you should just stop talking and get it over with," he grumbled. "I'm sure Lord Braska and I will be able to adequately handle the fallout."

"Hey, stop talkin' like it's gonna be a bad thing!" Jecht protested. "It's ME after all!" The rumbling of thunder cut through the silence following his declaration.

Rikku shrugged. "Well, here goes nothing!" She sucked in her breath and activated the sphere. A swirl of energy surrounded her, and she tipped her head back and spread her arms to welcome it. The change felt slow, sluggish almost; she wondered what kind of tuning Shinra did to the spheres before he allowed them to be used. It felt as though there was something blocking her. The potential was there, scraping and moving under the surface of the swirling energy, but no feelings of being overtaken, being replaced by something -- or someone -- else pushed through to the surface. Frowning, Rikku squeezed her eyes shut and delved more deeply into the power flowing around her. The more she chased and grasped after the elusive energy, however, the faster it slipped from her reach.

Come on, come on! Somehow she was convinced that Yuna wouldn't have had this problem; probably even Braska could draw out whatever was hiding in the sphere. But Rikku wasn't a summoner, not by a long shot, and after a moment the light swirling around her died. Cracking her eyes open, Rikku looked at her hands - and let out an exhausted sigh. There was no change, and she grunted in frustration and wiped the sweat from her brow.

"What went wrong?" Braska asked, sensing her disappointment.

"I don't know!" Rikku snapped, more harshly than she intended to. She ducked her head. "Sorry. I was just hoping it would work, but I guess I really am out of luck. It was a long shot anyway."

Braska stepped towards her; the rain was plastering the cloth of his circlet to his head, and Rikku realized that she was the reason the rest of the group was getting soaked -- without making any progress through the dangerous fields.

"It's okay, let's just forget about it -- " she began, but stilled when Braska reached out and clasped her hands.

"Your belt... it summons the memories of the things you record in your spheres," he said. "Is that not what you told me?"

Surprised, Rikku could only nod. Braska gave her another smile of encouragement. "Do not give up hope, Rikkma. You yourself know how long it took for me to master the summoning of an aeon. Try not to fight with your memories. A summoner cannot struggle against the aeon he bonds himself to, for it would destroy him. It is only when we learn to fully accept the Fayth into our hearts and minds that they come to us."

Rikku had never questioned what it was like for summoners before; she just knew there was a lot of sweat and fatigue involved from whatever went on behind those closed doors. Now, though, she wondered at the precious, jealously guarded information that Braska was letting her hear. "So summoning -- it's not really about pulling out all that power, but giving into it?"

Braska's eyes warmed as he nodded. "It takes a great deal of trust... trust that the power you deliver yourself to will not harm you. Trust, and confidence. Summoning is about letting go of yourself and becoming one with something greater."

Mulling over his words, Rikku thought about Anima and couldn't help but let out a convulsive shudder. How in Spira had Yuna ever managed to master that dark, restless aeon? As if sensing her unease, she felt Braska's hands tighten over her own as he continued.

"But it is also about trust in yourself," he told her. "The Summon becomes a part of your own soul. If you know yourself -- if you accept yourself -- you will not be harmed." He stepped closer to her. "You are a strong, good-hearted woman. Trust in yourself, in your own abilities and powers, and you will master this sphere." He leaned in, and she felt a gentle pressure at her cheek, and then he was moving away before she could even register the soft brush of his lips against her skin. Rikku's hand flew to her face, her eyes wide with shock.

"For luck," he told her with a smile, gravitating back towards Auron, who had observed the entire display stoic indifference. "I believe in you. Try your sphere again."

Rikku nodded, her hand still on her cheek, which she was sure was starting to burn as red as Auron's coat. She didn't dare shift her eyes towards the other man; she could tell from his posture alone that he had gone stock-still. Even Jecht wasn't making a comment; rather, he was looking between Braska and Auron with a thoughtful, half-squinted expression that she hadn't seen for some time.

She took a deep breath. With everyone remaining motionless, there were only two choices. Either she could try again, or they could all became living lightning rods while waiting for the tension to break. Tough call. Closing her eyes, she passed her hand over the dressphere and called forth the power it contained.

It leapt over her skin in a painful crackle of energy, surrounding her with light; Rikku felt herself cringing and trying to push away from it, to master it. The sensation was a lot more raw and intense than her Shinra-prepared dresspheres, and she struggled for control.

Trust in yourself.

She repeated Braska's words, forcing herself to stop fighting the conflicting swirls of energy. Shoulders relaxing, her arms spread as electricity washed through her, at first burning and violent. She struggled not to clench, to accept the foreign presence and almost-familiar thoughts that raced through her mind. You won't harm me, she thought to the strange almost-consciousness that was taking a hold inside of herself. The glow of the transformation surrounded her, and a smile played at her lips. You are me.

She felt Jecht's wild laughter run through her, his overabundance of confidence and self-assurance. She saw the coins glinting as they spun through the air, turning over and over on themselves. And she saw herself, smiling as she deftly flipped the coins around her index fingers, her lips moving in a silent, rapid count. She was them; she was all of them, and they were her. Jecht tossed another coin, laughing in triumph as he won his bet, and with a start, Rikku realized it was she who was laughing. Laughing and twirling on her toes as the light faded, leaving her standing among her friends in the midst of the dark, rain-soaked Thunder Plains.

"Is there something you're not telling us?" she heard Auron say. The question wasn't directed at her.

"That is NOT me," came the quick answer from Jecht. "There is NO WAY that is me!" He was yelling now.

"Really," Auron was saying, this time his voice laden with amusement. Braska was making a few very suspicious snorting sounds.

Deciding to take pity on her companion -- he was, after all, the one who made this possible in the first place - Rikku completed her spin and snapped her cards around. They whirled around her, lifting in an unnatural breeze and threading under her torso and over her chest before following the line of her arm and falling into place in her waiting, outstretched hand.

"Of course it's not Jecht," she said. Her voice was loud and bright, all traces of the timid fear she had felt earlier vanished. "Do you think he could ever look this good in a million years? This is one-hundred-percent yours truly!" She winked and blew her friends a mocking kiss.

The men turned to her and she posed for them, completely unabashed by the triple set of stares she was receiving. "See something you like?" she asked them.

"I see the resemblance now," Auron said, his eyes rolling upwards.

Rikku pouted, jutting a hip out as she tapped the bottom of her chin with her cards. She knew the sphere was working, just as surely as she knew no amount of falling rain would be able to plaster down the feather ornament that was woven into her hair. "Well, I can't help it if you boys can't keep your eyes off of my sexy bod!" she purred, winking at him.

" 'ey hey hey," Jecht broke off, waving his hand at Rikku. "C'mon, I'm not really like that, am I? Besides," he added, turning a gleaming eye on her. "There's only one sexy bod on this Pilgrimage, and it don't belong to you."

"Humph, I wonder what Braska and Auron would say about that," Rikku teased, her blood warming at the thought of some -- any, really -- competition. "Wanna bet on it?"

"I think not," Braska said, managing to recover his voice. He coughed, carefully manoeuvring his eyes to remain planted on Rikku's face. "While I am pleased by your success, Rikkma, I'm afraid I fail to see how this new outfit of yours will assist us in our travels."

"What he means is how the hell are ya gonna cross the Thunder Plains in heels?" Jecht added, sidling up to her and giving her skimpy yellow dress a critical once-over. In response, Rikku let out a shrill, confident laugh, crossing an arm over her mouth. "I do NOT laugh like that," Jecht added sullenly.

"This is an outfit I'm familiar with," Rikku explained, slapping her cards into Jecht's face and sending him reeling backwards -- and conveniently out of her arena of personal space. The spotlight was only large enough for one, after all. "I used to call it Lady Luck. Although it does feel like it has a few new touches." She tapped her lip. "I don't remember ever being this loud before," she admitted, then gave the others a winning smile. "But I'm sure it's an improvement!"

"Of course," Auron repeated, still eyeing the flimsy yellow costume with distaste. "How is it that you're managing to stay dry when the rest of us are soaked?"

Rikku winked and turned, sashaying onto the open plains. "I guess I'm just lucky!" she crowed, tossing her cards into the air above her head. Thunder rumbled and lightning flashed, coursing down towards her. At the last moment, the bolt split, charring the ground on either side of where she stood. Turning around, she gifted them with a winsome smile. "Well? Are you boys coming, or do you want to wait and see how long it takes for your luck to run out?"

"That... could be useful," Braska observed as he gathered his robes and hurried after her.

"If you can put up with her long enough to stand it," Auron grumbled in reply.

They both stopped short when Rikku threw a few cards at them. The stack whirled in place, bathing them both in a burst of ephemeral petals of red and gold.

Rikku caught the returning cards with a snap. "A little spell I call Felicity," she explained. "You two shouldn't get hit by any lightning either, unless you want to be." She winked at them. "Stay close now, you wouldn't wanna be caught without me when it wears off!"

Jecht hobbled alongside them, peeling a stray card off of his cheek. " 'ey!" he grunted. "What about me?"

Rikku narrowed her eyes and smirked. "Well, I guess you'll just have to rely on your own good looks to get you through this one." She glanced at the sky. "Oh, and you might wanna move."

"Why? All this star power blocking your limelight?" Jecht snapped back. The sky flashed, and then a yelp filled the air along with the scent of burned hair. Rikku looked down her nose at the man sprawled on the ground before her.

"Not anymore," she sniffed.

.x.x.x.

Despite the initial arguments, it didn't take long for Rikku and Jecht to become fast friends despite -- or perhaps because of -- the Lady Luck dressphere; altogether not too surprising, considering how much of her new personality was based off of Jecht's own. Of course, her sudden competitive streak and the mixture of ballooning egos didn't allow everything to proceed quite as smoothly as their easy banter. In addition, she continued to refuse him her luck charms, given Jecht's penchant to challenge her for the spotlight. The Thunder Plains was her stage, and if Jecht couldn't concede gracefully, she'd let the lightning teach him better.

She noted with amusement that he was getting more adept at dodging the lightning strikes as they travelled deeper into the rain swept plains; the blitzball reflexes helped. The singed toes he received when he didn't manage to jump away in time were an even greater motivator.

For as trouble-free as the actual trek through the Plains themselves were, there were still a few unpleasant surprises in store for the party. Battles, as they quickly found out, were not quite as easy as before. While her presence as Lady Luck seemed to grant a boon to their spoils of war -- something they all sorely needed -- there was a price to be paid for the sudden good fortune.

They discovered this with the first elemental monster they faced, which happened to be a disgruntled Gold Element. Some quick defensive casting by Braska ensured that nobody was electrocuted, but it soon became clear that brute force was not the going to be the easiest solution to their monster problem. And Rikku, as the resident black magic caster, stepped into her role.

She wasn't sure what made her gamble, or why; a sudden, capricious whim and the thought that the results might be amusing, perhaps. Either way, she laughed with delight as she closed her eyes and spun her cards around, allowing the luck of the draw to choose her spell rather than pulling it out of the Conflagration Grid she wore. Of course, even Lady Luck could have her dry spells, and her companions had been less than amused when she ended up hitting the thing with a Thundara spell of her own. After a confused scuffle, a hard-won victory, and a scathing bout of mostly ineffectual yelling on Auron's part, Braska diplomatically suggested that they relegate Rikku to the role of support, rather than attack.

That suited everyone, particularly Rikku, just fine, and she took a great deal of pleasure thereafter in randomly granting her companions luck blessings -- though she did manage to "accidentally" knock out Jecht once. "Oopsie! My mistake!" she had giggled to her incredulous companions.

Rikku sighed to herself as they strolled -- or rather, as she strolled, and the rest of the Pilgrimage sludged -- through the slick, treacherous path of the Plains. There were advantages to wearing the Lady Luck sphere, she noted as she examined the finish of her lacquered nails. A hazy, carefree lightness continually fogged her senses, and Rikku found she couldn't bring herself to truly worry -- or even care -- about most of their trip.

The kiss Braska had given her no longer concerned her, though somewhere in the back of her mind something was screaming that it should. Auron's weary, guarded looks also made her smirk; she ignored the slight twinges of discomfort that those gave her and brushed it off as indigestion.

More than once her erratic, carefree attitude landed her in trouble; the Iron Giant lair she inadvertently led them into on one of her "shortcuts" could have gotten messy, were it not for Braska's healing magic and Auron's skill with the blade. Even her brushes with danger seemed to be cloaked in a gauzy haze, though; Rikku chuckled to herself, flicking her cards through her hands. Live for the moment, take a few risks. Life is short, why should we worry about silly things like consequences? she mused, turning her head to eye Auron.

He caught her look and winced, and her smile widened. She sauntered over to him, noting with disapproval that both arms had disappeared into the depths of his red coat.

"I thought I told you it looked better off the shoulder," she murmured, glancing up at him through lowered eyelashes.

Auron was silent for a moment before answering. "I prefer to have some measure of protection from the elements," he told her, his voice bland.

"The elements aren't bothering me," Rikku replied, gesturing at the almost-indecent slit running down the center of her yellow dress. "A little help might take care of that problem for you, too. Say, a kiss?" she added with a wink. "It's not often that fortune smiles on mankind, and even less often that she looks this good."

Auron stared straight ahead. His grip on the handle of his sword, which was slung loosely over one shoulder, tightened. "Rikkma. For Braska's sake, I am willing to grant you leniency for many of your actions." He turned his gaze to her, and his eyes were hard. "Don't push your luck. Even the Lady's will run out eventually." He turned away and stepped up his pace.

Rikku smirked, but allowed him to draw away. "Maybe next time," she murmured with a twinge of disappointment. She knew she looked great; the man would have to be dead to not notice the amount of thigh she was flashing or the way her dress plunged suggestively past her navel. And she knew for a fact that he wasn't, yet. She let out a disconsolate sigh and wished she had a mirror to check her appearance in. Maybe she wasn't pouting enough?

A shout rose from the head of their group, and Jecht jogged back towards them, thoroughly soaked. He paused to twist out of the way as a lightning bolt whizzed toward the spot he had been standing moments before. "I see a building up there!" he shouted at them, pointing towards the top of the hill. "Looks like some kinda travel agency!"

"Travel agency?" Braska leaned on his staff with a look of surprise. "Strange... it should have taken us longer to reach it. The journey through the first half of the Plains is usually more than a day long."

"Maybe we got lucky, huh?" Rikku boasted, prompting mutters and tired looks from every single one of her companions. "What?"

"Can we ask her to go back to normal yet?" Jecht groaned. "Dodgin' lightning is easier than putting up with that," he added, waving in Rikku's direction.

"I'm right here, you know."

"I must admit, I will be somewhat relieved when this leg of our journey is over," Braska agreed.

"Hey, not you, too!" Rikku's cards circled around her head in obvious agitation.

"Thank Yevon," Auron muttered, turning a pointed look towards her. "Get out of that thing before someone sees you and questions us. What we need now is discretion, not luck."

"Humph, fine, but I'll have you know that I like this dressphere," Rikku replied to him cattily, holding her hand over her belt. She released the magic, and it bled from her body in a rush, almost as quickly as her confidence faded. Lightning roared overhead, and Rikku jumped in surprise - and then slipped against the slick path, dropping to her knees and landing face-first in the mud. She pushed herself up from her prostrate position with a low groan. "I hate that dressphere," she grumbled, trying to slick the mud away from her face.

"I dunno, I could get to like it. Look at these results!" Jecht laughed at her, reaching over and swiping a finger through some of the mud on her forehead before flicking it back towards her nose. "I always thought you were supposed to wait for the spa before you got the facial."

"Oh, can it," she yelled, pushing herself to her feet. She whirled on Auron and Braska, fists balled. "And you two! How could you let me go around making a fool of myself like that all day? Ugh, I feel so -- ! so -- !"

"Dirty?" Jecht offered, shaking his mud-crusted finger off in the rain.

"At least I know where all the bad puns came from," Rikku shot back, glad that the mud mask she was currently wearing would at least hide the hot blush on her cheeks. She stomped forward towards the travel agency, feeling a more than a little foolish and a lot humiliated. A dresssphere based off of Jecht's personality! What had she been thinking?

A firm hand on her shoulder stopped her before she got far, and Rikku glanced around to see Auron holding her back. She flushed, clearly remembering each and every one of her spurned attempts to flirt with him during their journey. "Umm... about anything I might have said to you while... uh... under the influence," she mumbled. "I'm really, really sorry, okay?"

He didn't answer, and Rikku thought her mud mask might start cracking off of her face in flakes from the burn in her cheeks. "You could say something!" she squeaked, her color rising.

"Watching you blush is much more entertaining than watching a false reflection of yourself trying to seduce me." Rikku's embarrassment was waylaid by surprise as her mouth dropped. Auron released her and let out a low chuckle, then threw a lump of soggy cloth at her. She caught it and stared, bemused.

"This is my cloak from Bevelle!" She shook it out.

"Wear it," Auron instructed her. Then he looked at Braska. "You too."

Braska was already removing his circlet and replacing it with one of the hooded cloaks they had worn through the snowy fields of Macalania. Rikku allowed herself to be distracted by the sight of his long, brown braid -- Braska never showed his hair, at least not normally -- before turning back to Auron in confusion.

"The travel agency here is owned by the Al Bhed," Auron explained.

Rikku felt a sudden thrill of elation run through her. Al Bhed! She'd nearly forgotten; the Thunder Plains Travel Agency had been one of Rin's first footholds into his wildly successful merchant chain enterprise. She wondered eagerly if a younger version of the man might be there himself; he'd only be slightly older than she was at this point. Forgetting the cloak in her hands, she turned eager eyes onto the Agency, thinking of how to greet her fellow kinsmen.

Jecht, who was listening in, had a less enthusiastic reaction -- he rolled his eyes and threw up his hands. "Here we go again," he muttered. Then he tilted his head. "Wait-a-minute. Why would the Al Bhed be runnin' anything for one of Yevon's Pilgrimages?"

"The Summoner's -- Pilgrimage," Rikku amended before she could say Sacrifice, "... affects us all. Everyone wants to be free of Sin. Even if we don't like the Church, that doesn't mean we should punish the Summoners." She didn't add that the Thunder Plains was a barren, treacherous and highly unprofitable segment of the Pilgrimage, and that it was more of a reluctant concession to allow the Al Bhed a trading station in one of Spira's least desirable spots, rather than an act of true generosity.

Braska, fortunately, came up with a more diplomatic explanation before she had to. "The Al Bhed are responsible for the care and maintenance of the lightning rods that draw the thunder strikes away from this path. In thanks for their continued service and generosity, the Church of Yevon has offered them the trade rights to the area." Even as he said it, thunder roared overhead, and they all looked up.

"Prime piece o' real estate, this here," Jecht observed.

Braska coughed into his long sleeve. "Well... due to certain circumstances, I am not what you might call popular among the Al Bhed." He pulled his hood up, letting it fall over to shade his features. "I believe in this instance, it would be best to allow Auron to handle the negotiations."

"Jecht, you're with me. Rikkma, you stay with Braska," Auron commanded, turning towards the agency. Rikku's mouth dropped open, again, and she clutched the cloak in her tightening fist.

"Hey! Hey wait a second, shouldn't I be the one coming with you? I mean, hello? Who speaks Al Bhed here?" She grit her teeth as Braska raised a hand and Auron canted his head towards her. "I mean who speaks Al Bhed fluently?" she added, flustered.

Auron sighed, tapping the sword against his back. "If you insist, you can accompany me, Rikkma. I'm surprised that you would be willing to risk identification by your own people, though. An exiled Al Bhed, on a Pilgrimage with one of Spira's most notorious summoners," he pointed out.

Rikku's hopes fell. Of course he was right; smart Auron, careful Auron, always thinking ahead Auron. Just -- why did always being wrong have to hurt so bad? Trembling, she dropped her head and slipped the cloak on over herself, pulling up the hood to hide her long, blonde hair.

Auron said nothing, though his lips were twisted into a frown; in sympathy, perhaps, but still uncompromising. "You can both wait for us outside the doors, but try not to be seen until I come out again. They can't turn us away once we've secured the rooms." He regarded her for a moment longer, then swivelled around. "Jecht," he called, striding towards the agency.

Rikku watched him go, wiping a drop of muddy rain off of her nose. Definitely rain, she told herself sternly as she looked down.

A pair of waterlogged robes moved into place next to her boots. Her eyes followed them upwards; under the hood of his soaking cloak, she could barely make out Braska's tranquil expression. He made no move to follow Auron towards the building, preferring instead to face the consuming dark of the wilderness. Rikku joined his observation of the never-ending storm, watching lightning strike the landscape at regular intervals.

She struggled for words of comfort to give to Braska, whom she knew was suffering just as much as she was, if not more. Hers was an artificial prison; one fraught with personal risk, but an exile by choice, even if the others didn't realize it. Braska's suffering, on the other hand - that was real. She wanted to comfort him, to tell him that he wasn't alone, that people didn't hate him for who he was, or whom he married. But Spira was a cruel world, and Braska had clear eyes. Thunder rolled across the plains, and she reached out and slipped her hand into his. It was cold and limp, and had she not grasped him, it would have fallen out of her grip.

Rikku swallowed. "You still have us," she said, reverting to Al Bhed. "Me, Auron, Jecht... and Yuna. We're your clan now. We'll always be your clan."

Braska sucked in his breath and turned his head towards her, his blue eyes piercing in their honesty. "Truly?" he replied, also in Al Bhed. "Why, then, can't you tell me your real name?"

Rikku bit her lip, hard. She felt her teeth cut into the soft flesh, felt blood mixing with the flow of rainwater, saliva and mud on her tongue. Even though both were blue, she still thought he had Yuna's eyes. Yuna, to whom she could refuse nothing. And she was tired, as tired of secrets as Braska was of exile.

She opened her mouth and gasped in air. A slow trickle of warm blood leaked down her chin, cooling rapidly. "My name is -- "

Braska silenced her with hand to her mouth; the gentle warmth of a healing spell washed across her skin, closing the wound with a quiet whisper. His finger lingered across her bottom lip for a heartbeat too long before he drew it away; even as the tickle of magic faded, Rikku still felt an electric tingle where he had touched her. He turned his face away.

"I am strong enough to face Sin... to see my own death, to continue to hold Jecht to his ignorance, to abandon my own daughter. But..." His hand spasmed around hers before loosening. "... I do not want to know your real name. I don't think I could bear it, Rikkma. I don't think I could bear to lose her twice."

Rikku blinked as a particularly spectacular bolt of lightning roared to life before them, striking close to where they both stood. Neither flinched.

"I'm not your wife," she said. "I'm not some pyrefly construct of memories come back to haunt you. You won't have to Send me anywhere."

Braska shuddered. "But you are different, Rikkma. I can feel it. I feel it in my soul, I feel it in the aeons who bond with me. I feel it when they gaze at you, when you ask them your silent questions and that part of them which is not me answers."

She tensed, and he hesitated.

"No," he decided. "Don't tell me." Rikku looked at him in surprise, and he gave her a wan smile. "I, too, need my illusions." He began to extract his hand from her grip, and she caught it and held on.

"I meant everything I said. Whatever you might think of me, our friendship isn't an illusion." She willed him to believe her. He stared back, but she refused to release his hand until the despair receded from his eyes. "You're not alone," she told him. "We'll be with you until the end. All of us."

"Don't promise that," he chastised her. "I know what it is to live with your heart torn in two. You don't belong here... you wish to return to your home, wherever that is. My path seeks to bring life to Spira, but I will pay the debt accrued with my own death. If you have the chance to find your own happiness, it's your duty to take it. It's what I wish for you. It's what I ask of all of you, even of Auron. Your paths are not set, not as mine is. I would tell Jecht the same, if we found the chance to send him back to his Zanarkand. Leave, and never turn back to this journey of sorrows."

Rikku dropped her head, feeling ashamed. There was nothing she could say to that; know yourself, Braska told her. And in her heart, Rikku knew that what he offered then was everything that she really wanted. Hearing it come from his own lips, however, only made it sound selfish.

Braska straightened, his face gentle. "Ah, but I should apologize, Rikkma. Forcing us both to stand in this rain. Come, let us take shelter from this storm," he said, offering her the crook of his arm. Feeling numb, Rikku took it and allowed herself to be led to safety.

Footnotes

I know light travels faster than sound, but not in the Thunder Plains. That's canon. Thanks, SqEn.

Felicity [Lady Luck]: Raise the party's Luck.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

20: Fancy Footwork

Rikku looked up from her perch on the steps as Jecht stooped over the rough-cut sign. Braska had retreated into the building to dry off once the blitzer made his appearance and gave them the all-clear.

Rikku was grateful for that, feeling subdued and uncertain in Braska's presence. Jecht was as oblivious as ever; his newfound serendipity was due in part to the large bottle of Al Bhed paan he was currently nursing. He'd gravitated to the public notice posted just outside the door.

Bored, but not yet willing to relocate indoors, Rikku kicked her heels against the soggy ground. "What's it say?"

"Dodge and Win," Jecht read out loud. "Says here the more you dodge, the more you can win. You just gotta register with that Hypello inside." He smiled toothily, polishing off the rest of his drink before tossing it over his shoulder and letting the empty bottle roll down the hillside. Rikku squeaked in protest, then shrugged in resigned dismay.

"So are you gonna do it?" she asked.

"Why the hell not?" Jecht replied, making his way back into the building. Moments later he emerged again, this time with Auron, Braska and a Hypello trailing after him. The Hypello paused upon seeing Rikku, taking in her crop of blonde hair and swirled pupils, then gave a small shrug and continued shuffling – as if seeing an Al Bhed on Pilgrimage was an everyday occurrence. Rikku grinned. Sometimes she just loved the Hypello.

"Yoo jump the lightning?" the Hypello crooned, blinking at Jecht.

"That's right!" Jecht boasted, puffing out his chest. "Just you watch, I'm gonna win ALL them prizes!"

"There are no adoring fans to impress here, Jecht," Rikku pointed out.

Unperturbed, Jecht cracked his neck and rubbed the back of his head. "Who cares? We'll get free stuff, won't we? Just call it pullin' my weight. 'Sides, I made Auron buy the beer."

"If just to shut him up," Auron explained sourly. "Before you start playing any more of your ridiculous games, there's something we need to discuss. Alone," he added, shooting a glare over his shoulder at their extra guest. The Hypello blinked and wandered towards the sign, uninterested in whatever it was they had to talk about.

"Auron!" Rikku hissed, glaring at him. "That was rude!"

Auron shrugged, unconcerned. "Hypellos don't waste time with useless frivolities. Neither do I." He frowned. "However I called this meeting because we have a slight problem."

"Problem?" Braska asked. He had pulled down his hood to replace the helmet on his head, and for a moment Rikku mourned the loss of his braid. He seemed smaller and more human without the ritualistic trappings of Yevon that he chose to wear.

"Yes. There's another group of travellers staying at the agency tonight, and there was only one room available. It will not be comfortable." All three sets of eyes swivelled to look at Rikku. Jecht was the first to respond with a widening smile.

"Finally," he snorted. "The little princess has to share digs just like the rest of us. Welcome to the real world, Blondie."

Auron glowered at Jecht. "Perhaps we should just let you sleep outside. You are the one who snores, after all."

"It's not a big deal," Rikku said. "I'll sleep on the floor; I'm used to roughing it. In fact, if this works out maybe we can save a little money later on and just bunk up together whenever we stop to rest at an inn. It's not like we don't camp together already, right?"

Braska looked as if he was on the verge of objecting, but Auron cut off his protest with a firm shake of his head. "They don't have the space and we don't have the money to negotiate. Unless you want to sleep in the rain tonight, it's this or nothing." Thunder cracked, and Rikku found herself nodding.

"Say 'yes' already!"

Braska still looked hesitant, but after a short internal struggle, he sighed and dropped his shoulders.

"It seems we are determined to break every rule on this Pilgrimage. Very well. Though I apologize for any harm that may come to your reputation, Rikkma."

Rikku rolled her eyes. "I'm Al Bhed. I can take a few hits; stop worrying already."

Braska looked down in quiet dismay and pushed to his feet. "Do as you will," he said, moving away from them.

"Great!" Jecht waved a lazy hand as he wandered towards the Hypello. "Just don't pull any of that dress shit on us. We've had enough of them lucky charms for today." His tone was light, but Rikku hesitated, thinking back on Braska's good-luck kiss and odd behavior outside of the agency. How much was there really behind Jecht's simple demands?

Is he trying to protect Braska? She shook her head.

No matter what his intentions, Jecht's advice was sound; she didn't need Lady Luck's confidence – or libido – not when she was going to be spending the night sandwiched between her three companions.

"Did something happen between you and Braska?" Auron's question cut through her thoughts.

"He asked me what my name was," Rikku replied as she watched their two companions talking in the rain. "I didn't tell him." She paused. "He didn't really want to know."

Auron remained silent, pressuring her to continue. It only took a mere moment to break her indecision; she was confused, and he would listen. Simple.

"It's just... well, you know, we're here, and it's Al Bhed, and I thought maybe I could cheer him up, but it backfired, and then he asked about me, and then he thought I was Unsent, and then I cut myself and he healed it and told me to run away if I could but I think he was really asking me to stay and I don't know anything anymore!"

Rikku inhaled deeply and closed her eyes. "Except that he's sad. He doesn't want to be alone, but he doesn't want to hurt us... and he definitely wants to – " She choked. " – to fight Sin."

"He won't be alone," Auron assured her. "I will remain by his side until the end."

"That's what I told him!" Rikku exploded. "I told him we'd all be there for him, but he didn't want us to be. It's like he's already dead inside!"

Auron's face was grave. His words were unexpectedly gentle, all things considered. "He was right to tell you so. You can't promise anything for the others. You can't always promise things of yourself," he added. "Would you deny Jecht the chance to reunite with his wife and son for Braska's sake? Would you really want to take that choice away from him?"

Rikku scowled. But he won't leave, she wanted to say. He can't leave. Stumped and frustrated, she let out an angry snort and dropped her head onto her knees. "Don't say a word," she groaned into her kneecaps. "I know you're right already, so don't rub it in."

She listened to the faint strain of voices blending together with the falling rain as Braska, Jecht and the Hypello conversed, and realized with a sharp pang how much she hated this Pilgrimage. Not for the first time, she found herself wishing that Bahamut would have also stolen her memories, not just her future. It was easier to worship legends from afar; getting to know them was fraught with all sorts of unexpected dangers. The desire to change time, to change history itself pulled at her; the ever-present horror of Sin's ravages reminded her of what that bit of selfishness would ultimately cost.

I'm going to miss them, she realized bitterly. It's going to hurt more than watching Tidus and Auron leave the last time.

Desperate, Rikku lifted her head and scrabbled through her pouch. Auron eyed her, wary of the inexplicable burst of energy after her obvious depression. Intent on her mission, she ignored him and pulled out another one of their blank spheres. "For making memories," she said when he jerked back.

"I am still uncomfortable with those... things," he admitted.

Rikku frowned. "But you don't believe that they suck your soul or anything anymore, do you?"

Auron frowned. "I do find myself re-evaluating some of my beliefs," he told her. "But old habits are hard to break."

Smiling, Rikku offered him the empty sphere. "Now's a good time to start, don't you think?" She nudged him. "You said it yourself. Pilgrimages! New beginnings! Turning over a new leaf as a chronicler!"

Auron accepted the sphere from her with a skeptical expression. "Hnn," he grunted.

"... or not," Rikku added with a small laugh. "I think chroniclers need to have more than a three-syllable vocabulary."

Ignoring her in favor of studying the sphere, Auron jabbed at it with a fingertip. "Leave the editorials and just tell me how they work," he grumbled.

Smiling, Rikku pointed out the controls. "You press this darker part here to activate the recording." She motioned towards a specific spot on the sphere.

"Like this?" Auron pressed his thumb roughly into the delicate controls. With a gasp, Rikku reached over and grabbed his hand before he could shatter the device.

"Not so tight!" she scolded him, repositioning his fingers. "Spheres can take a lot of abuse, but they're not exactly blitzballs. You have to be a little careful!"

Frowning, she leaned in closer and covered his hand with her own; she marvelled at how much larger it was than hers. Even alive and warm, his skin was still ghostly pale by comparison.

Feeling shy, Rikku adjusted his grip on the sphere, wondering why Auron wasn't objecting, or at the least delivering some sort of scathing retort about her teaching abilities and the sanctity of his personal space. Not that she doubted the former; it was more that brutal critique was something she had come to expect from him. His silence, she was finding, was much more unnerving than his sarcasm.

Clearing her throat, Rikku slid her hands away from his. "You have to leave room for the sphere to capture the images you want to record, too," she managed to say, proud that her voice hadn't completely deserted her. "Try to cover as little of the surface as possible with your grip. And face the brighter side forward."

"Am I doing it properly now?" Auron asked, turning the sphere around in his hands.

"Yeah, exactly!" Rikku gushed, pleased at his quick adaptation to the foreign technology, but moreover relieved that he wasn't commenting on her strange behavior. A small part of her was glad that he was either dense or blatantly unwilling to pick up on her discomfort.

"Just press that spot to start recording. You can pick anything, really. Wait, I got it! Why don't you try recording Braska? You know, for Yunie!"

"Hnn," Auron grunted in reply, standing and aiming the sphere towards the man in question. He paused, his forehead wrinkling as he observed the tableau before him. "What in Yevon's name is he doing?"

Confused, Rikku looked at Braska. Comprehension dawned when spotted Jecht over his shoulder. The blitzer was hopping from one foot to the other under the open sky. He lifted a telling finger to the rolling clouds overhead with a cocky grin.

"Oh, that," she said with a bored sigh. "Jecht's trying to see how many lightning hits he can take before his hair burns off."

Auron snorted. "I knew I shouldn't have bought him that paan. Your people's beer makes Yevon's holy wine seem like rosewater. He doesn't need the lightning to lose his hair. Just give him another few bottles of that poison and it'll fall out on its own."

Rikku shrugged; it wasn't as though she was about to deny anything Auron had just said. Al Bhed beer was almost as world-famous as their technology. It was still considered a controlled substance in Bevelle.

"Hey, tough people need tough drinks. Besides, it happens to be a handy fuel replacement if you find yourself in a tight situation. Always practical, that's another one of our mottos!" she cheered.

"And Spira finally discovers the true cause of your unique pupils," Auron sniped with some amusement. They watched Jecht leap too slowly from a lightning strike, only to land sprawled on his back. "At least it should numb some of that pain."

Rikku waved Jecht's shock-injury off. "Look, Braska's healing him already. He'll be fine! … I think."

Jecht picked himself up off the ground and approached the observant Hypello with a look of pleasure. There was some kind of exchange, and then Jecht handed Braska a few bottles of what appeared to be hi-potions. Sensing Auron's curiosity, Rikku piped up.

"It's a contest," she explained. "Dodge-the-lightning, or something like that. You can win prizes."

"Hmm, so he can be useful after all," Auron mused.

Privately, Rikku was glad Jecht volunteered. It was a chance for fresh supplies that they couldn't afford to turn down, and she didn't think Auron would be fast enough to avoid the lightning on his own. Braska's heavy robes wouldn't have helped either; besides that, he was their Summoner. There was something inside of her that just rebelled at the thought of allowing their leader to willingly electrocute himself while his Guardians stood by and watched.

Which left only her or Jecht to do the jumping. And there was no way in Spira – scratch that, in the entire Farplane – she was going to start lightning-dodging for fun.

Noticing his audience, Jecht waved them over. "Hoo-ie!" he yelled, shaking his shaggy mane out and sending fat water droplets flying. "Did'ya see that? I'm gonna nab that two-hundred dodge prize in no time flat!"

Rikku's mouth dropped open. "Two hundred? Are you nuts?" The last time anyone had tried to dodge that much lightning, it had been Tidus accepting the agency's challenge. Afterwards, he hadn't needed to use Wakka's hair gel for days. They'd only gotten him to relent after Lulu agreed to do the prize jumping, much to everyone's surprise – until they saw her sending out one of her stuffed cactuars into the rain in Tidus' place. She'd kept the hard-won prize to herself, too, not that anyone had dared to question her. Even Tidus knew better than to pester a mage with a cactuar that crackled lightning needles.

"I'm not crazy, I'm good," Jecht replied, all confidence. "And I want you to get this on the record," he added, noting the sphere in Auron's hands. "For the fans!"

"What fans?" Auron asked smugly.

"Well I can name at least one, 'bout seven years old. I think you might know her." Jecht smirked.

"C'mon, you said you wanted to try it!" Rikku urged, ignoring the fact that he technically hadn't said anything. Silence without protest was just as good as implicit agreement in her book, prompting her to give Auron a nudge with her elbow. "Look, you've got a willing audience, too!"

With a patient sigh, Auron shook his head in disbelief and pressed his thumb against the sphere. It glowed with telltale soft blue light; he flinched, but managed to keep his grip on the sphere. Swinging it around, he peered through the blue water as Rikku had instructed.

"Hey! Hold it steady!" Jecht shouted.

Auron rolled his eyes. "Why am I doing this?" he ground out, his thumb moving over the power button. The light of the sphere died out, and Jecht shouted in protest.

"Aww c'mon Auron, I haven't even started yet!" Seeing how little effect his words were having, he beseeched Rikku instead. "Blondie! Make him do it right!"

Rikku sighed and crossed her arms. "Auron," she muttered under her breath. "I didn't teach you all that stuff about spheres for my health, you know."

"This is completely ridiculous," Auron replied in a disgusted voice, trying to push the sphere back onto her. "It's nothing more than child's play and a waste of our time."

"It's not a waste of time!" Rikku replied too loudly, drawing Jecht and Braska's stares. The Hypello was still oblivious to their banter, but she toned her volume down anyway. "Maybe it is child's play," she hissed at Auron. "But just who do you think these spheres are for, anyway? Jecht? Braska? Think again!"

Auron fell silent, glaring at the sphere in his hand. He looked up and caught a glimpse of Braska's profile, which seemed to cement his decision. With a deep frown, he stabbed at the controls once more. Jecht whooped in victory, but Auron ignored him and focused the sphere on Braska instead.

Braska's face was turned towards the heavy thunderclouds in the distance. His expression was just as shuttered as it had been when he spoke to Rikku alone.

"What do you see there, my lord?" Auron asked.

Braska turned and stared in faint surprise, observing the glowing sphere in Auron's hands. His eyes flicked to Rikku, lips stretched in a thoughtful smile. "Oh, I was just... thinking," he replied.

Rikku shivered, feeling the mood dampen from Braska's melancholy in ways all the rain in the Thunder Plains couldn't manage. Clenching her fists, she forced herself to look away. Thankfully, Jecht was more than willing to provide a much-needed distraction, whether he knew it or not.

" 'ey! This is important!" Jecht hollered at Auron over the sound of rolling thunder. "No foolin' around," he added, glancing up at the sky in anticipation. "You're gonna spoil it!"

Auron spun the sphere around just as the lighting struck; there was a bright flash, then – "Whoa!" – and the all-too-familiar smell of singed hair was rising above the acrid scent left in its aftermath.

Blinking, Rikku sought out Jecht; he sat up slowly from where the blast had thrown him, shaking his head. If she squinted, she thought she could see a little smoke coming from his ears.

Braska was already issuing the next healing spell, waving his staff.

"Are you all right?" he asked, kneeling by Jecht until the other man's eyes came back into focus. Auron, who also approached, was much less sympathetic.

"Now there's a scene for posterity!" he interjected in a smug tone.

Jecht looked up in irritation, rubbing his head. "Yeah, yeah..." he grunted as Braska laughed. "Just stop that thing and give it to me already, alright?"

In an unusual show of charity, Auron shrugged and allowed Jecht to have the sphere without argument. "Not much of a display for your fans," he observed. "Unless you're trying to lose them."

Jecht scrambled to his feet and tossed the sphere to Rikku, who caught it by reflex. "I'm not making a new costume out of this," she declared.

"Much as we'd love to see that," Jecht replied amidst the groans, "it ain't for you. Just put it with my stuff. I'll give it to my boy later! I bet he'll like seeing that." Embarrassed, he straightened and rubbed the back of his head. "I'll make another one for Yuna, you'll see!"

"Perhaps later," Braska added, still grinning. He nodded at the Hypello, who bobbled towards the agency doors. "It has been a long day. I believe we should all retire to a dry room and warm food."

"As long as the paan ain't warm, too," Jecht added.

Rikku scowled. Not that she didn't appreciate Jecht's good humor, but his addiction was, as Auron delicately put it, worrisome.

"How about not including any paan at all?" she suggested.

Jecht ignored her and brushed by, and then Auron stopped at her side. "We can argue this point later," he murmured in a low undertone. "Braska is exhausted, we all need rest."

With a reluctant nod, Rikku sighed and followed the others inside.

.x.x.x.

They retired to their lone bedroom soon after entering the agency; the frosty reception Braska received was enough to drive the entire group from the lounge in a show of solidarity.

And cowardice – or caution, as Rikku preferred to call it – on her part; she kept her hood up and her head down, careful to hide any sign of her outfit or coloring that might have hinted at her Al Bhed origins. Braska was a convenient, if a bit unfortunate, distraction. To Rikku's great relief, Rin wasn't there; she remembered hearing he'd been trying to open a shop at the foot of Mount Gagazet. The Ronso were a proud, stern people, however, and Rin's contract had taken months to finalize – long after Braska's Pilgrimage was over, Rikku realized with a twist in her gut.

The room turned out to be larger than expected, but still a shade too small for comfort. With only two beds to share, Braska insisted Rikku claim one – over Jecht's loud protest – while Auron relegated Braska himself to the other. The remaining bedrolls were spread between them, and a moody silence broken only by the occasional thunderclap settled over the group.

Even Jecht was more subdued than usual, despite the easy access to alcohol; it wasn't hard to see why. Surrounded by the hostile darkness outside and cramped, dull grey walls inside, the small room reminded her too much of their incarceration in Bevelle.

If she could have escaped from the pressure cooker, Rikku would have. More than ever before, she felt the grip of shame overtake her; shame for her family and her clan.

They, the Al Bhed, wronged by Yevon for too many years, had grown so used to prejudice and hatred that they unwittingly took to heart the very lessons they claimed to abhor. It cut her to the quick to see Braska suffer the hostile stares, and a small whisper of conscience reminded her that once, she herself had been no different from the agency personnel.

But I am different now... aren't I? She tried to focus on the work at hand. I hope so.

When Auron left the room to gather food for an evening repast, Jecht trailed after him with the more lascivious intent to seek out a specific choice Al Bhed beverage. That left Rikku alone with Braska, and she busied herself with the duty of synthesizing some of the hard-earned loot onto their equipment. It was difficult to keep her concentration on the delicate metalwork needed to graft materials onto Auron's bracer, though; her mind kept straying to Braska's distant look, and the feel of his fingertips on her lips. She blinked and stared at the bracer in her hands.

I like Auron.

Unbidden, her eyes flew to Braska and she flinched. Wiping some sweat from her brow, she tried her best to ignore the hairs standing up on the back of her neck. Braska's unerring gaze had been locked on her from the moment she started working. She caught him staring every time she snuck a glance up, and wondered if he bothered to blink. It was a little creepy. Well, a lot creepy. Most of the time it was like he didn't even really see her. She was tempted to snap at him, as she would have at Jecht or Auron had they been doing the same.

"You're afraid of lightning," Braska said, breaking the monotonous silence.

Rikku started and looked up. At least the misty, distracted expression was starting to fade; she supposed an uncomfortable interrogation was still better than Braska's distance.

He gave her an appeasing smile at her wary expression. "I don't mean to criticize. Actually, I'm rather impressed. You're afraid of the lightning, but still you managed to overcome your fear."

"Same as you," Rikku replied without thinking. Her eyes widened and her hand flew to her mouth as Braska looked away. "I – uh, I mean..."

"You would paint me a hero," Braska said. "I thank you for that. But it's not quite true yet. I don't know that I'll pass the final trial when the time comes," he admitted.

Rikku's eyebrows lifted. "Auron doesn't doubt you," she said, careful to keep her voice steady.

"He's a good man," Braska answered just as neutrally.

Rikku nodded. Didn't she have this conversation with Auron already? I didn't like it then, either. She fiddled with the bracer. "Um, listen. I don't mean any disrespect here, but, uh. If you're going to say what I think you're going to say, could you maybe just not say it?"

Braska looked surprised, and Rikku pressed her advantage.

"Just because I'm the only female on this Pilgrimage doesn't mean you have some kind of duty to hook me up with Auron. And it doesn't mean he has the right to force me onto you either! What if I don't like either of you that way?"

Braska gave her an amused smile, and Rikku felt transparent. Maybe the wrong argument here. Feeling her cheeks turn red, she refocused on the bracer. "Well, okay, but let's say neither of you like me that way?" she grumbled.

Braska smirked. "I'm fairly sure I can assuage at least some of those fears. But," he added, holding up a hand as Rikku stiffened, "I take it you mean that Auron is not returning your affections the way you want him to. You shouldn't give up all hope."

Rikku's frantic polishing of the bracer slowed down. "Why are you telling me this?" she asked, looking up at Braska. "I mean, don't you, umm... well, you know, you... and me, and well your wife and all," she said in a rush, forcing herself to meet his gaze.

The corners of Braska's eyes crinkled as he smiled at her. "Seeing you here is a great inspiration to me, Rikkma. I'm trying to overcome my own doubts and fears. I think of it as a challenge. One I must best."

"Oh," Rikku said, deflating as she mulled over his words. Braska didn't want to fall in love again, that much she could gather. Maybe he feared he would forget his wife - Raenn was foundation for his Pilgrimage and supplied him with the will to drive it forward.

Well, pardon me for not helping you figure out less painful ways to kill yourself there, was what she wanted to tell him. But even Rikku knew it was a dumb idea to air. Really, really dumb. It would be like taking Yuna's Gunner sphere and practicing Trigger on myself. Yep, it would definitely be a disasterrific thing to say to Braska right now. She bit down on her tongue to keep any sharp retorts from spilling out, just in case.

Braska frowned at her. "You shouldn't hurt yourself that way," he warned her. "Unless you want me to heal it again."

Rikku released her tongue instantly, her face turning bright red. Braska finally dropped his gaze. The ensuing silence wasn't only pregnant, it was having triplets.

"My intents are pure, but at times I find my will lacking," he murmured. "I apologize for my... indelicacy. Please, let us forget it for the moment and continue our conversation," he said, his tone pleasant.

Rikku winced; Al Bhed were known for being brutally honest and outspoken when it came to their emotions. She could see why Braska generated such irritation within her family during his visit and subsequent courtship of Raenn. "Umm, sure. Just... leave off the Auron bits off for now. Let's talk about something else instead, okay?" Braska seemed relieved at her acceptance of their charade, and Rikku smiled uncomfortably.

"Tell me... how did you overcome your fear of lightning? As inspiring as I would like to think this Pilgrimage may be, I suspect we are not to blame for your courage."

Rikku couldn't help but laugh a little at that. "Courage?" she giggled. "Umm, not really. You should've seen me the first time I came here! I grabbed onto my friend's leg and wouldn't let go no matter how much he tried to shake me off! Afterwards, the others told me I looked like a desperate monkey. I was so scared I didn't even care." Rikku stifled another laugh. "Eventually one of my friends got fed up with it and suggested that I camp out here for a week."

That would've been putting it nicely. After one particularly embarrassing brush with a Larvae during a sphere hunt and their subsequent loss to Leblanc, Paine privately threatened to skewer her if she didn't get over her astraphobia. Rikku was grateful the taciturn warrior hadn't ever actually told soft-hearted Yuna just how much of that camping trip had been inspired by sword point rather than bravery. The end result was the same, after all.

"I see," Braska was saying. "You seem rather well-travelled."

"Oh!" Rikku fidgeted. "Well, yeah, I guess you could say that." She smiled in relief as the door to the room slammed open and Auron stomped in, balancing a tray of food in one hand and a tight grip on Jecht's arm in the other. "Dinner!" she cheered, grateful for the distraction.

"Get in there and stay in there," Auron growled, shoving Jecht to the floor.

"Aww, man – " Jecht said, his voice pitching to a near-whine.

"You are NOT dodging lightning for paan," Auron ground out. "Don't make me repeat myself. I promise that you'll regret it." He slammed the tray of food onto the small table pushed up against the wall, sending soup slopping over the sides of the bowls. "Your dinner," he told the others. "If the soup seems a little thin, it's only because our brilliant companion over here overshot our budget with his addiction."

" 'ey, I didn't know I'd drunk that much!" Jecht protested.

Auron glowered at him.

Jecht shrugged and reached for one of the bowls, but Auron thunked his sword onto the floor, cutting off Jecht's progress before he could reach the food.

"Not for you," Auron grunted, his eyes narrowing. "If you want to sustain yourself on beer, that's your choice. But you will not steal nourishment from the mouths your companions as well."

Jecht slouched back onto his bedroll and sulked.

Braska sighed and shook his head, ignoring the two bickering men and claiming his bowl of soup; Rikku followed him in turn. It was only after Auron also procured his own bowl and they begun their meal that Braska broke the silence.

"So then," he said to Rikku, putting down his spoon. "Are you a Blitzball player, by chance?"

Rikku choked on her soup.

Jecht snorted, sitting up and hunching over his bent knees. "What, her? Are you kiddin' me?" He laughed. "Look at them skinny little arms! I bet she couldn't even toss a blitzball across a sphere pool!"

Insulted, Rikku sniffed. "Shut up! I so can play Blitzball! I'll have you know I'm one of the best passers in the league! Nobody passes like the Rikkunator!"

Auron frowned. "I don't remember seeing you in league games," he said.

Rikku blushed. "Well, I, uh, I don't play professionally anymore. You know, falling out with the Al Bhed and all that." She didn't think Auron was buying her story, but fortunately the mere mention of Blitzball was enough to whet Jecht's interest.

"No kiddin'! You, a blizter! Who would've thunk it?" Jecht muttered. "What position do you play?"

Rikku stuck her tongue out at Jecht. "I prefer the midfield, but I can do backside defense too," she answered. "Oh ye of little faith! I bet I could block some of your passes!"

"But not my shots," Jecht bragged.

Rikku snorted. "Well, if you wouldn't knock the defenders unconscious with a ball to the head, we might have more of a chance. I swear, the Jecht Shot is the worst thing to ever happen to Blitzball!"

Jecht stared at her. "How would you know? I ain't never done the Jecht Shot on you."

Rikku shrugged. "My friend Paine practiced the Mark III on me once, and that was more than enough," she groaned.

"There's a chick doing my shot?" Jecht yelled. "There ain't nobody who can do a Jecht shot! That's why it's called the Jecht shot!"

Rikku rolled her eyes. "You keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better," she sang with a smirk. It dropped after a moment of consideration. "You know, I don't think you'd get away with calling Paine a chick, either. She might not look it, but I bet she's got more muscles than you. And she knows how to wield her sword."

Jecht grinned. "Sounds like Auron's dream girl to me. Even got the right name."

Rikku blinked and came out of her fantasy. She snuck a glance at Auron, who up until then had silently endured the conversation. Now he was glaring at Jecht once more.

Was it because Jecht was right? Paine was the serious type, and so was Auron. And Paine was a fighting machine – you only had to look at her in Full Throttle mode to see that much. Was that the kind of girl Auron would go for? A warrior? She cringed even while kicking herself for not grabbing the warrior dressphere before her journey began.

"Don't presume to know anything about me or my tastes," Auron grunted. "Especially when you yourself have none," he added with a disgusted curl of his lip. He focused on eating the rest of his soup, stiff posture daring Jecht to make another comment at his own peril.

"Hit a nerve, did I?" Jecht replied, undaunted. "Well if I'm so wrong, why don't you tell us what you like in a woman, eh? I'm sure we'd all love to hear it." Apparently the beer feud he lost was still fresh in his memory. Or the paan was running high enough in his blood to make him forget caution. Tension in the room skyrocketed, and Auron dropped his spoon into his bowl with a loud clatter.

"Jecht, shut up," Rikku hissed.

"I'm just tryin' to help you out here!"

"You call this helpful?" Anger and embarrassment warred for domination.

"Rikkma." Braska's voice cleanly snipped the taut emotional wires that had grown between them. "How did you manage to travel so far, if not through professional blitzing?"

Her fury deflating in a rush, Rikku smiled at Braska gratefully. "I've... uh... been on some trips." The relief faded when Braska tilted his head in thought.

"The Al Bhed usually travel in numbers for safety. And as much as it pains me to say this, they wouldn't always be welcome in certain places, no matter how large or small their group might be."

He paused, and Rikku smiled past the sinking sensation in the pit of her stomach. Braska was good at defusing tense situations... but at the moment, she was more concerned with the cost of their latest truce.

"The only two exceptions of this rule which come to mind are the professional Blitzball League... and Pilgrimages, of course."

Auron was now paying complete attention to the conversation, his curiosity waked.

"I... um... well, I... huh, you know it's funny, but – "

"You've been on Pilgrimage before," Braska concluded, surprise registering in his voice. He only had to look at her with those Yuna eyes, and Rikku found herself nodding against her will. She could feel Auron's stare burning into her. "Who was your summoner?"

Rikku studied her hands, trying to maintain her outward poise. Her mind raced in panicked circles. I need to name a summoner, and quick! But who's a summoner they'd believe? A flash of inspiration struck her; what about Lulu's old summoner? Lady Ginnem, wasn't that her name? She opened her mouth to spit out the answer, and froze. What if Lady Ginnem hadn't even started on her Pilgrimage yet? Or worse yet, what if she had? Would Braska had heard of her? No, she thought, booting Ginnem's name out the metaphorical window. C'mon, Rikku, thinkthinkthink! What about the other summoner they'd met on Yuna's Pilgrimage? The dead one? She'd said she was the guardian of a forgotten temple. What was her name again? Belgie... Bella...

"Belgemine!" Rikku blurted out in triumph, before moderating her tone. "Lady Belgemine, I mean," she repeated. "She was... unique." Ain't that the truth.

"Belgemine," Braska repeated. "Strange, I've never come across that name in my studies before."

"That's because her Pilgrimage failed," Rikku said. "At the Calm Lands." At least that much was truth. Her words had an immediate and profound effect on Auron and Braska; their expressions grew sober at her revelation.

"Failed?" Jecht repeated. "What, like she didn't pass a test?"

"... something like that," Rikku told him. In a strange way, she had liked Belgemine despite her eccentricities. She wasn't in the mood to pander her story for a paan-buzzed Jecht; it seemed too disrespectful.

"It means she died in the Calm Lands, Jecht," Braska answered for her.

"Hold up a minute, died?" Jecht sat up straight. He gave Rikku a confused, helpless look. "But weren't you her Guardian?"

Auron slammed his bowl of soup on the floor, nearly cracking the ceramic. "Shut up, Jecht." For once it was a relief to see such serious displeasure directed at someone besides herself; it was actually a little embarrassing to consider that maybe – just maybe – he was getting so worked up on her behalf.

It took a few more extremely awkward moments for Jecht to process the command. "But if Blondie here was her Guardian, and the Summoner died, wouldn't that mean she – oh. Oh, I get it! Ooh..."

Auron was looking angrier by the syllable, and Braska for once didn't seem to be coming to the rescue. Rikku, for her part, tried to act like a disheartened, emotionally scarred Guardian who had failed at her duty as best she could. It wasn't that hard, considering she really did have plenty of scarring Guardian experience; still, it felt a little uncomfortable to lay claim to such a sensitive role when it wasn't really hers to play. At least this will throw Auron and Braska off the scent for a little while.

"It's all right," she ventured, taking pity on Jecht, who was now rubbing his head and looking no better than a whipped chocobo. "It was a long time ago."

"You must have been so young," Braska said with a note of sorrow.

"Fifteen," Rikku admitted. "But you know... it was a learning experience. Helped me grow, I guess? I'm way better at this now than I was then," she reassured Braska.

She looked at the three men and nodded to herself. Some of her internal tension, at least, had eased – it wasn't so much the unexpected reprieve Belgemine's convenient Pilgrimage provided, more because her conclusion sounded so right. Content to let the trouble Jecht stirred lie, she cleared the surface of her bed. Flopping down, she shut her eyes and tried to ignore the rumbling of the storm outside. "We're all tired. Let's just stop arguing about this and get some rest," she said out loud.

Auron grunted in agreement. Though her eyes were closed, she was willing to bet he was looking at her and forced herself not to shiver. How long it would be before he sniffed out her latest in the huge tapestry of lies she was weaving together? The strange, complete confidence she placed in him – that he, of all of them, would figure it out in a matter of time – almost made her smile. She cracked her eyes open, and to his credit he managed to not look surprised when she met his stare.

"Thanks," she mouthed silently.

His eyebrows lifted in surprise at her acknowledgement – with all the confrontation crackling in the room, doubtless he'd expected her to add to the mix. The lines on his face softened, and for Rikku it was even better than one of his wry smiles.

She stomped out the guilty mental droning of her prophecies of doom and gloom and rolled to her side instead, Auron's expression lodged comfortably at the forefront of her mind. The way he had looked at her just then had been relaxed, and more importantly, honest. At least there could still be moments of simple, comforting honesty in this Pilgrimage full of deception and lies.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

21: Shocked

The morning was as bright as it could possibly get in the Thunder Plains, which, honestly speaking, was not very bright at all. Rikku rolled out of the bed, feeling energized – and maybe just a little bit intimidated – by the crack of lightning that pulled her from her light slumber. She glanced around the room.

Braska was sleeping heavily in his bed as usual, a peaceful expression on his face. Rikku scowled; it wasn't fair that he was able to sleep through the thunderous noise of the ongoing natural concert outside.

Glancing towards her feet, she saw Auron was also still asleep, snoring lightly into his bedroll. His face was slack, relaxed for once, and Rikku couldn't help but smile. He looked even younger than before, and she had to quell an urge to push one of the stray strands of hair away from his face. Despite their frequent disagreements over the course of the Pilgrimage, he still hadn't tucked away the two long fronds she'd prodded him to let out during the trial in Bevelle. Auron really did seem to be doing his best to discourage any and all of her attempts at flirting with him, but the fact that he had yet to change his hairstyle bolstered her confidence. I'll wear him down yet.

Easing herself out of the bed, she stepped over him and tiptoed towards the door. Closing it behind her, she made her way towards the common room. It was bleak and nearly empty, lit only by the natural thunderstorm, a few candles, and the weak, bluish light from the sphere stand set up in the corner. A figure hunched over one of the tables caught her attention; coming closer, Rikku recognized him as he swayed.

"Jecht!" she whispered, approaching him. He was surrounded by empty bottles of paan, evidence of what was apparently one hell of a bender. How the heck did he manage that?

He burped and sat up straighter, blinking owlishly at her. Then he grinned a sloppy smile. " 'ey there, Blondie. What time is it?" He wiped his bleary eyes.

"Too early to be drinking that," Rikku replied suspiciously. She cleared herself a space at the table and sat down, pinning Jecht under a furious glare. "You shouldn't be drinking that much!"

Jecht's grin faded into a defiant grimace, and he downed the undoubtedly warm and flat remains of the bottle clutched in his hand. After he'd swallowed, he eyed her right back. "Needed a pick-me-up after all that dodgin'." Then his expression brightened, and he reached back and fumbled for something in his pocket. "But take a look at this!" Finding his prize, Jecht withdrew a small, cloth-wrapped object and threw it onto the table. It landed with a heavy thunk, parting the cloth surrounding it, and Rikku sucked in her breath.

"Where'd you get this?" She pulled the rest of the cloth away and inspected the heavy runic symbol hidden within its folds. There was no mistaking what it was, though Rikku had to admit she'd never laid eyes on this particular one before. Even if she hadn't known, the sheer power of the magic trapped inside the small lump of metal was enough to set her teeth on edge. "This is a Celestial Sigil!"

"Celestial Sigil?" Jecht repeated, staring at the symbol. "All I know is that they gave it to me after two hundred dodges. Actually, they seemed kinda glad t'be rid of it." He passed his hand over the metal, stroking it, and Rikku shivered.

That wasn't any surprise; no one could really be comfortable around one of the mysterious, holy artefacts that comprised the true power of a Celestial weapon – no one except the rightful owner of such a sigil. It was said the weapons chose their own masters – that they would appear, revealing themselves to warriors destined for greatness, becoming lost to obscurity only when the life of their owner ended or their world-changing duties ceased.

From the way Jecht was carelessly handling the thing, ignorant of the waves of energy it radiated, it looked as though the weapon had chosen him to become its next master. That, or he truly was drunk enough to be oblivious.

"Trust me, it's really rare," Rikku said, itching to take a closer look at the thing despite the chills it sent up her spine. "Can I touch it?"

Jecht snorted. " 'Course you can, it's a goddamn paperweight." He tossed it towards her and Rikku caught it with a gasp. Turning the precious object over in her hand, she inspected the runes and symbols worked into the metal, trying to determine its origin. A trident-shaped mark embossed on its surface caught her eye, and Rikku rubbed her thumb over it.

"Neptune," she finally breathed. "This is the Neptune Sigil." Grinning, she held up the sigil for Jecht to inspect, pointing out the symbol.

"Whazzat supposed to mean?" Jecht asked, his eyes half-closing as his head began a slow descent towards the tabletop. Rikku kicked him in the shins and he jerked upright.

"Oww! Damn! Alright, Neptune Sigil, I got it! So what's the big deal about it anyway?"

Rikku rolled her eyes. "It's just special, okay? You need to hang onto this. Don't give it to anyone else, don't lose it, and most of all..." Here she paused, eyeing the evidence scattered across the tabletop, "Don't sell it for booze!"

Jecht yawned. "Well, if it's so damn special, why don't you hang onto it for now?"

Dropping the sigil as though it burned – in a way it did – Rikku shook her head and pushed it back across the table. "It's yours, Jecht. Your responsibility. You keep it."

"Huh. Fine," he grumbled, rewrapping the sigil and shoving it back into his pocket. "Don't see what's so special 'bout the damn thing anyhow."

"Maybe one day when you're sober you will." To this Jecht gave a grunt, and Rikku sighed. "Just keep your eyes open for this symbol. If you find something else that looks like it, don't ask questions. Trust me, just grab it!"

Groaning, Jecht leaned back in his chair and stretched. "Yeah, yeah, whatever. So, Braska and the Stiff up yet?"

Rikku picked at her fingernails, peering at Jecht through lowered eyelashes. "Not really." She paused, swallowing; this was a conversation she really, really hadn't planned on and didn't want to have with Jecht. "Listen, we gotta talk..."

"We're talkin'," Jecht said, though he did allow the legs of the chair he'd been leaning back in to hit the ground with a thump. The tone of her voice must have caught his attention because now he seemed to be fully awake, regarding her with a touch of curiosity. "You gonna tell me somethin' 'bout my boy?"

"No," Rikku hummed, winding her fingers together. "This is about you, not Tidus. Umm, well... you and your monkey, I mean."

Jecht stared at her, his face slack. "I don't own no monkey," he said. "You, uh, you havin' another one of them crazy-attacks?"

Rikku separated her hands, slamming her fists on the table. The empty bottles jumped; one slid off and shattered on the floor. She flinched and directed an angry glare towards Jecht. "I don't mean a pet monkey. I mean the one on your back." When he started to turn, she slapped the table again. "I didn't mean LITERALLY!"

"Well what the hell are you goin' on about? Monkeys and Neptune Sigils and all that shit?" he fired back, irritated. "Talk normal, girl, and maybe I could get a clue!"

Picking up a bottle, Rikku pushed it into Jecht's face; he went cross-eyed. "This monkey!" she hissed. "Everyone's noticed, you know, even Braska. If you're not sloshed you're being an asshole. What's the deal with you anyway?"

Jecht's face closed and he grabbed the bottle out of her hand. "I just need a little help, that's all. It ain't no damn monkey business," he said. "I drink 'cause I like it. Makes me feel good. I could stop whenever I wanted."

"Sure," Rikku replied flatly. "Did you ever stop and think that maybe this Pilgrimage is a teenie weenie little bit more important than making yourself feel good?" She sniffed and winced. "Besides, you smell almost as disgusting as you look. It'd make the rest of us feel good if you wouldn't clean out the agency's entire paan supply." Her brow furrowed. "And I thought Auron told you not to dodge for beer! He's gonna be beyond pissed when he finds you here like this."

Jecht ducked his head. "I didn't do no dodgin' for it."

Rikku waited as the silence grew, with Jecht looking more uncomfortable by the second. She tapped one impatient finger on the table.

"I traded for it, alright?" Jecht shrugged.

"Traded?" Rikku echoed. "Traded what?" A sense of foreboding overtook her as Jecht hunched even lower over the table. "Traded what, Jecht?"

He mumbled something unintelligible, and Rikku narrowed her eyes. When he glanced up, she gave him a Rikku Look Mark II that would have made Auron proud. Flinching, he picked up a stray bottle and plucked at the label. "Just a little somethin' we found," he mumbled.

"Define something," Rikku said. At this rate, Jecht was going to make her temper give Auron's a run for his money.

"Well... y'know... that jar of, uh, stuff you had."

"Stuff?" Rikku repeated, her stomach clenching.

"Yeah, stuff. I dunno what it was, that shiny stuff. You had all those things laid out when you were workin' on Braska's staff yesterday, and it was just lyin' there. I, uh, I thought maybe you didn't need it, y'know?" He was rubbing the back of his head and looking distinctly uncomfortable now, but Rikku ignored him.

She was too busy digging through her pockets, mentally trying to catalogue what she'd collected and synthesized to figure out what Jecht would call "a piece of shiny stuff" – which could define over the half of what she tended to pull from fiends. Swiping a hand over her breast pocket, Rikku froze. She patted the pocket again – I was sure I put it here – and then with a sinking feeling, faced Jecht.

"Did it sing?" she asked, her voice dangerously soft. "That stuff you took?"

Jecht scratched his head. "Sing? Wha – ? Naw, it was just shiny and swirly. Those guys who took it, they seemed real happy, said I could have as many as I wanted," he added, gesturing at the scattered bottles.

"Swirly... shiny, and in a glass vial," Rikku repeated, feeling sick. Her fists clenched on the table. "It did, you know."

"Huh? What did what?"

She had to keep talking, or Rikku was sure she'd grind the enamel right off of her teeth. "It sang." Her voice began to rise, growing a little shriller with each word she spoke. "It sang because it was rare. It sang because it was beautiful. It sang because it was worth more than this entire building and everything in it put together!" By now she was standing, and her hands – which she honestly hadn't noticed moving – were slapping Jecht over the head as he ducked under her blows. "It sang because it was a piece of the Farplane, you great big stinking MORON!" she screamed. "How could you steal from me? How could you steal that from me?"

"Calm down, you'll wake everyone up!" Jecht flinched away from her. "Geez, I didn't know, alright? Take it easy, I'll get it back!"

Rikku let her hands drop, realizing the futility of her assault. Beating Jecht black and blue wouldn't bring the Farplane Wind back, satisfying as it might be. "And how's that, huh?" she asked, glaring at him. "You'll find me another Espada and kill it all by yourself?"

"I'll just ask 'em," Jecht said, pushing away from the table. "Wasn't that much beer anyhow."

Rikku stuck her foot out and tripped him back down into his chair with a fierce expression. At least, she would have tripped him back into his chair, had Jecht not lost his balance and fallen with a clatter to the floor. She wasn't feeling particularly sorry, though, and continued without pause.

"They're not going to give it back, Jecht! They're not as stupid as you!" Blinking back her angry tears, she turned away from the table – and drew up short as she took in the small audience observing their antics. The proprietor of the agency, followed closely by his Hypello assistant, was staring at her, shocked – most likely processing that one of Braska's mysterious companions was also an Al Bhed. Judging from the look of his rapidly cooling expression, one who was a betrayal of their native cause.

"What are you doing with them?" fired the innkeeper in rapid Al Bhed.

"None of your business," Rikku shot back, spotting more figures moving in the corridor behind him. Another entourage of – she bit back a groan – Bevellian priests. Missionaries from the looks of it, woken by their scuffle. Behind them, she could make out Auron's bulk, filling the hallway – and the rest of the room, in fact – with a dark aura of displeasure.

"You are guarding that Summoner," the innkeeper replied, switching back to the common Spiran tongue. "Guarding the clis who stole our sister!"

Rikku's back straightened. "Don't you dare call him scum," she snarled, still answering in her native tongue. "Don't you say another word!"

"It is you who will keep silent, traitor! Speak another word in the tongue of my people and I'll cut it from your mouth!"

My people? The innkeeper specifically excluded her. Rikku stepped back, her mouth opening and closing in shock. Was this how Braska felt all the time?

"What is going on here?" Auron's voice broke through the crowd, even as he shoved the gaping priests out of his way. "Rikkma?" he asked, glancing between her and the innkeeper.

"You. You should have told me you were bringing that with you," the innkeeper said, facing Auron now. "Leave, the night is over and your party is no longer welcome here."

One of the priests snickered in the background. "A drunkard, an Al Bhed, and an ex-monk, all following the great Lord Braska," he muttered, the sarcasm in his voice clear. "Oh how the mighty have fallen, haven't they, Sir Auron?"

Rikku jumped at the priest's tone even as Auron's face grew stony. It wasn't a lucky day for any of them; Auron, young as he was, was more famous than she'd guessed. Dropping her head, she glared at Jecht, who squirmed his way off of the ground while looking guilty. She hadn't meant to get them kicked out, but it was obvious they'd overstayed their welcome.

"Pardon me..." Braska pushed his way forward through the priests, who parted before him with looks of surprise. His face was serene. "We were on the way out already," he reassured the innkeeper. "Come, it's time to go."

Dropping her head in shame, Rikku grabbed Jecht's arm in a painful grip and hauled him towards the door. Auron followed behind him, his knuckles whitened from the severity of his grip on the handle of his sword. Braska paused, turning to face their audience. "I thank you for your hospitality." He bowed respectfully, ignoring the innkeeper's loud snort, and trailed after the others out into the rainy plains.

For a while a gloomy silence settled over the group as they trudged into the everlasting storm; Rikku folded her arms together, scowling. Anger prevented her from feeling the sting of the rain, or even shock at the flashes of lightning that struck around them. Only when the travel agency dropped out of view did her pace slow. She slicked her soaked hair away from her face.

" 'ey, Blondie," Jecht called out to her, and Rikku tensed.

"Don't talk to me right now," she spat.

"But I – "

"La la la! Is that the wind I hear blowing? Must be, because I think I was being pretty clear!" Rikku yelled, plugging her fingers into her ears.

"Shut up," Auron said, his temper short. "I want to know exactly what happened." He glared at them both. "I've had enough of your antics. Your shameful behavior today interrupted Lord Braska's rest! Or have you already forgotten that you're supposed to protect him from hardship?"

"It was nothing," Braska murmured. "One can hardly rest in such a hostile environment – "

"No, I'm sorry," Rikku piped up. "Stop trying to be the hero, Braska, that was all my fault. I lost my temper and it wasn't fair to you or Auron."

" 'ey! What about me?" Jecht asked.

"You deserved it." Rikku's tone frosted over. She turned to Auron, ignoring Jecht's wince. "Do you know what he did? He stole from me! He stole our loot!"

Auron's expression twisted in wry amusement. "I thought you were the thief."

Rikku yelled in frustration and pulled at her hair. "It's not funny! He stole my Farplane Wind!"

Auron's face registered confusion, but Braska frowned at the revelation. "I've heard rumors of the existence of such things... pyreflies that could be bottled, whispers of death that could be caught. How did you manage to acquire such a thing, Rikkma?"

Rikku sighed. "It was that Espada we fought. It was... well, special somehow, I guess. I just felt it and I grabbed for it and boom! Out it came!"

"A rare and precious gift indeed," Braska repeated, a note of awe in his voice. "Where is it now?"

"Well, I wonder," Rikku said. "Maybe Jecht knows!"

Jecht mumbled under his breath. "You don't have to be such a bitch about it," he sneered. "Excuse me for not knowin' it was special."

Rikku clenched her fists. "You know what? I changed my mind. Give it to me. You took something of mine, so I'm taking something of yours."

"Huh?"

"The Neptune Sigil! Give it here!" Rikku held out her hand.

"But you said that was special! And I won that fair and square!" Jecht protested, his hand covering the pocket containing the object.

"Jecht! You sold my Farplane Wind for beer! You – you – you're asking for it!" Her hand reached for her sphere grid out of habit, but she was stopped by Auron's sudden, swift grip on her wrist. Though he pushed her back, his glare wasn't directed at her.

"You stole our supplies and traded them for liquor?" he asked, too calm.

Braska observed the exchange, his lips drawn tight as he looked at Jecht. "And what exactly is this 'Neptune Sigil' Rikkma is speaking of?"

Reluctantly, Jecht pulled the bundle out of his pocket, unwrapping it. "I won it dodgin' lightning."

Braska's gasp was more than enough to confirm the object's value. Auron released Rikku and frowned.

"Hand it to me. Carefully," he stipulated as Jecht made a motion to lob the small object through the air.

"Sorry already," Jecht grumbled. "If I'd known that Farplane-thingie was worth the whole damn buildin', I wouldn't've done it."

Auron nearly dropped the Sigil into the mud. "What?" He looked down at Rikku, who only nodded a miserable confirmation. "Unbelievable," he grit out, glaring at the Sigil. Then he did a double-take. "Is this – "

Braska spoke up, his eyes widening. "A Celestial Sigil! Yevon smiles upon us... that object is far more valuable than a Farplane Wind." Then he studied Jecht with renewed intensity. "I understand now. First the sword, and now this..."

Auron looked at the Sigil in his hand. Then he looked at Jecht, skepticism splashed across his face. "My lord, you can't possibly think – "

"It's the only explanation," Braska replied, still staring at Jecht. "He was meant to have it. He is the one that sword chose." Then he smiled and clapped a surprised-looking Jecht on the shoulder. "To think, we have a legend in the making in our midst!"

Braska's cheerful smile jarred against Auron's incredulous gaping and the not-so-subtle clouds boiling over Rikku's head. He grinned at Jecht, and Rikku and Auron exchanged a brief but mutually pained look. Braska, it seemed, would always be Braska.

"You know, just forget it. There's not much anyone can do with a single Farplane Wind after all." Rikku had to force the lie out through clenched teeth. Sighing, she plucked the Sigil out of Auron's suddenly lax grip. Jecht was on her blacklist. Even his unwitting mastery of the Neptune Sigil wasn't going to change that. "But I'm hanging onto this anyway until Stupid here can prove that he won't trade it for something worthless at the next bar we come across."

Braska, still smiling at Jecht, clapped him on the shoulder once more, a little more firmly. "I think that is an acceptable solution, don't you Jecht?"

Well, maybe Braska isn't as clueless as he looks, Rikku thought with some satisfaction.

"Whatever," Jecht grumbled. He grimaced at Rikku in a rough estimation of an apology. "Sorry 'bout the trouble, Blondie."

Rikku opened her mouth, but Auron beat her to the punch. "We need to have a word, Jecht." His words were harsh steel, and Braska shot Auron a brief, disapproving look which the other man ignored. "Lord Braska, Rikkma. If you'll excuse us."

Rikku allowed herself to be led away when Braska tugged on her arm. They stopped under one of the lightning shelters. "Hey, you forgave him already, right? So why're you letting Auron go all scary on him? Isn't that, like, against the rules?" Not that she minded, but curiosity forced her to ask.

"Rules?" Braska laughed. "I try to avoid telling Auron what he may and may not do. He is a grown man, after all."

"And he's your Guardian," Rikku replied, watching as Auron leaned closer to Jecht, wearing what she could only best describe as his scary face. His lips were moving, and from whatever he was saying, Jecht appeared to be sobering up quickly. "Isn't he supposed to do what you tell him to?"

"Auron has his ways," Braska replied. Rikku noticed he was watching the exchange just as avidly as she was. "He does what he feels is in the best interest of the group – in my best interest. Sometimes that conflicts with my own wishes and desires. For example..." he trailed off, gesturing.

"You mean this whole Pilgrimage," Rikku supplied. "Can't say I blame him."

Braska's responding smile was amused. "I refuse to compromise on the most important things," he clarified. Then his smile faded. "Jecht... has a problem. But it is one which none of us can remedy. He has to find the answer within himself." He sighed as Jecht said something which displeased Auron, who growled out some kind of cutting response. Jecht flinched.

"But you'll let him stay with us anyway?" Rikku asked. "Uh, 'cause it looks like Auron's really putting him through the wringer there..."

Braska sighed. "Auron doesn't know when to back away from a delicate situation," he supplied. "Jecht requires space. A lecture – no matter how stern – will do nothing for him at this point. Being scolded for one's faults rarely inspires a person to remedy his behavior. What's done is done. There's no point in dwelling on his mistake."

His smile returned. "Besides... I have faith in Jecht. He will come through this. Even without the proof of the Neptune Sigil, I would believe in him. He has a strength in himself which he does not yet realize. Maybe that is why he tries so hard to prove himself through other venues. Such as Blitzball. And drink."

Rikku frowned. "I guess so," she muttered. "Still wish I had my Farplane Wind back. If we were gonna lose it anyhow, that would have bought us supplies for a month!"

Braska chuckled. "Yes, well, no one ever said the path to redemption would be easy for any of us." He stared at Auron, who was now shouting and gesturing with one hand. Jecht, who had crossed his own arms over his chest, was scowling deeply.

"Jecht will recover from this disagreement with Auron in time." His smile deepened. "You always managed to."

Rikku blushed and bit back a grin. From that perspective, it was kind of nice to see someone besides herself getting flattened by Auron's temper. She almost felt sorry for Jecht. Almost.

.x.x.x.

The trip out of the Thunder Plains was much less exciting than the journey inwards. It might have been the moody silence which descended on the group; Rikku, still angered at the theft of her loot, refused to allow herself to even think about donning her Lady Luck dressphere. There was no guarantee Jecht would come out of the resulting scuffle unscathed. Auron, furious at Jecht after their "talk," refused to speak with any of them; he marched ahead of the group, tension radiating off of his broad shoulders. Braska, tired and resigned, followed at a more leisurely – if you could call slugging through the heavy thunderstorms of the plains leisurely – pace.

Rikku was sure Jecht was following her, but she was annoyed enough to push his presence from her mind, not wanting to know what he was doing with himself.

That was why, when Jecht let out a loud yell of pain, they were taken by surprise.

"The little bastard stung me!" Jecht yelped, wincing as he held a hand to his shoulder. His entire bicep was studded with a myriad of wicked-looking needles, and the arm below it hung limp and useless. Rikku's eyes widened as she recognized the source of his injury.

"You found a qactuar? Why'd you piss it off?" she growled, eying the little menace.

"I didn't know the runt had a bite," Jecht groused, edging out of the way of the jumpy, chittering fiend.

"Now you do," Rikku noted as she watched the creature. Seeing her chance as it dropped its guard to twirl around, she rushed in. Pyreflies, only pyreflies! Her hand shot forward, delving. Those weren't needles digging into her outstretched palm, but pyreflies – suddenly, she felt them.

With a heave, Rikku pulled her hand out, clutching three tiny, pulsing fire gems to her chest. She lobbed one at the qactuar immediately while scrambling to safety, not really surprised when she missed. The resulting explosion was still loud enough to send the creature scurrying away into the darkened plains, though. Rikku sighed; it would've been a difficult kill anyway – those little buggers were unbelievably fast. She grinned at the spoils she'd managed to pilfer despite the loss and pocketed them.

Turning around, she saw Braska leaning over Jecht's arm, grimacing at the mass of needles that had embedded themselves into the other man's flesh. "Why'd you pick a fight with it?" she asked as she approached, watching Braska carefully pluck them out, one by one.

"It was small," Jecht said. "I thought it'd be easy." He winced as Braska pulled out another needle and gritted his teeth. "Did I ever tell ya that I hate needles?"

"No," Braska replied, pulling another spike from the blitzer's arm, unperturbed.

"What were you trying to accomplish by yourself? Any battle – any – should be fought as a team, precisely to prevent accidents like this." Auron glared at Jecht. "Your irresponsibility knows no bounds."

Jecht winced, though Rikku wasn't sure if it was from Auron's words or the pain as Braska pulled the final few needles out of his arm. Then he dropped his head and mumbled something.

"If you have something to say for yourself, speak up!" Auron snapped.

Rikku frowned. So Jecht had blown their biggest treasure on his bad habit – granted, it had been annoying. But, remembering Braska's words, she felt a small stab of pity for the other man. Maybe Auron's way wasn't always the right way. After all, he'd forgiven her, hadn't he? "Uh, Auron..."

"I wasn't talking to you," he growled, his eyes never leaving Jecht's face.

Rikku leaned over and caught Braska's eye. "Wow. Was he always like this when I pissed him off?" she whispered.

"Worse," Braska murmured with an amused look. "Judging from the severity of his reaction, however, I believe he's growing rather fond of Jecht."

Rikku frowned. Auron, growing fond of Jecht? She sure couldn't tell it from the way he was glowering.

"Well?"

Jecht glared at Auron. "I said I was tryin' to make it up, alright? I just thought, I dunno, if I collected a few things from those fiends like you and Rikkma always do, then maybe..." he trailed off and shrugged, rolling his shoulder and flexing his palm a few times as Braska finished casting a healing spell. "Just forget it," he snarled, picking up his sword. "It was a dumb idea."

Auron was still frowning, but it didn't quite seem as though he was trying to melt Jecht into a puddle with his stare anymore. Feeling oddly charitable at Jecht's admission, Rikku sighed and hit him in the arm. The one that Braska had just healed. "Oops," she giggled as Jecht grabbed his shoulder and howled.

"Alright, I get it already Blondie!"

"Sorry," Rikku said, making a grab for his other arm. "It wasn't that dumb of an idea. But y'know, Auron and I manage to collect all that stuff because I steal it while he's taking care of the nasty business. You don't just go around killing things willy nilly." She paused. "Well, actually, I guess you sorta do. But we do it in style," she added. "As a team!"

"Well, ain't that just great for you two lovebirds," Jecht said.

Rikku ignored his dig. "If you really want to help out, why don't you come with me this time?" She noted Auron's frown, which was growing in length again, and sighed. "I think you could use the practice and maybe Braska wouldn't mind catching up on stuff with Auron. Right?" She smiled her brightest, most hopeful smile at Braska, who returned it with a knowing smirk of his own.

"Of course," he supplied. "We haven't had much of a chance to talk since our journey began, have we Auron?"

Auron opened his mouth as if to protest, and then let out an exaggerated sigh of defeat. "Fine. Go hunt if you want. Don't get yourselves killed."

Rikku took the opportunity to drag Jecht away from the group. "Wow," she breathed. "I didn't think it'd be that easy!"

Jecht shook her arm off, nodding in agreement. "Yeah, I thought he was gonna try and beat my ass down for a while there." Then he sighed. "Listen, I said I was sorry. You over it already?"

Rikku frowned to herself as she spotted a buer in the distance. "Nope," she replied. Then she faced him. "I'll manage somehow. But Jecht?"

"Uh?" he grunted, drawing his sword as he spotted their quarry.

"No more paan, okay?"

Jecht's brow lowered and his expression blackened. "I already told ya, it ain't a problem. What's up with you and Auron, playin' good cop bad cop now? Go fuck around with someone else's head." Not waiting for her answer, he rushed headlong towards the buer with a yell.

Rikku's smile faltered and a bit of the shining optimism Braska had instilled in her tarnished over. Maybe Braska's way wasn't always the right one, either. "We'll see," she mumbled, drawing her daggers, following him into battle.

Footnotes

"Clis" is Al Bhed for "scum."

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

22: Dreaming

Rikku stepped out onto the sunlit deck of the airship and squinted at the silhouette sitting near the edge of the platform.

What's she doing out here alone?

Making her way over, she seated herself next to the other girl and smiled. "Hey Yunie, what's up?"

Yuna sighed. "Oh, hey Rikku. I was just... thinking." A smile flitted across her lips, but there was the also the touch of hesitation that had always plagued Yuna's features during the Pilgrimage. Rikku's stomach flipped – wasn't that supposed to be long gone? She pushed the feeling of wrongness away and returned Yuna's smile.

"Thinking of what?"

Yuna sighed and looked over the endless fields of wildflowers stretching out below their feet. "The Fayth," she told Rikku. "Their dreams."

Rikku's smile faded as Yuna spoke. "Dreams of the Fayth," she repeated. One of the missing pieces clicked into place, and she blinked. "Tidus."

Yuna nodded. "Maechen told me that the dreams of the Fayth reach through the spirit of the Summoner," she whispered. "By touching those dreams, I can make them real."

Rikku gripped the metal of the platform and stared at the beautiful, empty tableau stretching before her. Please stop talking, Yunie. Please. The flowers were wilting now, the warmth of the setting sun fading into twilight. A sense of wrongness permeated everything. Yuna's face was slowly masked in darkness, but when she looked at Rikku, both of her startlingly bright eyes were blue.

"The dream of the Fayth, the power of a Summoner. That which does not exist becomes real for all to see," Braska's voice intoned. Cool fingers rested against her neck, and Rikku started as another, deeper voice whispered into her ear.

"What is your dream?" Auron asked.

You, she wanted to say. You've always been my dream.

"Liar," Bahamut rumbled. He was there, floating before her as a child, but his voice was ancient. "Your own story – that is what you wanted. You have never dreamed for others. You have always dreamed for yourself."

Rikku wanted to protest, but she couldn't move, couldn't even blink. She forced her jaw to open, squeezing the words between her unwilling lips. "I didn't mean it to be... to be – !" ... so selfish, she couldn't bring herself to say out loud.

The pressure on her neck increased; his voice filled her ear, a soothing balm to her crackling nerves. "Your dream wasn't meant for the rest of the world. Do not be ashamed."

"You wanted to see him again. Not just your memories," Bahamut told her in his usual monotone, and she couldn't tell if he was scolding her or not. " 'Even if just to say goodbye.' "

"But I can't let go!" Rikku blurted out.

"Then why do you seek us? Why do you wish to end your dream?"

"Yunie's world..." Rikku managed to whisper, her brow furrowing.

"A world without Sin," Braska completed for her. "Such a world requires sacrifice to build. The Fayth sacrificed their dreams for us. What, then, is one small dream of our own?"

Rikku wanted to shake her head, Braska was wrong. It wasn't fair! But she couldn't move; the fingers touching her neck held her still.

"Your happiness," Auron whispered seductively.

"Spira's future," Braska chided.

"You shouldn't seek us out. You know you aren't ready," Bahamut told her.

The encroaching darkness stretched out its tendrils, obscuring everything; Rikku could no longer see Braska or Bahamut, nor feel the touch of Auron's fingers. It wrapped around her like chains, robbing her of breath as she gasped and struggled, searching for the last vestiges of light –

.x.x.x.

Rikku woke in a cold sweat. She sat up quickly in her bed, trying to slow her breathing down and covering her eyes with the heels of her palms. "Just a dream," she whispered to herself. "It was just a dream."

"Rikkma?"

She dropped her hands and almost let out a shriek as she saw two blue eyes staring at her from out of the darkness, eerily reminiscent of the vision she had just woken from.

"Is everything all right?" Braska asked her with a touch of concern.

Rikku nodded, and then realized Braska probably couldn't see her. "Yeah, I'm fine," she managed to say, keeping the tremble out of her voice. "Just a bad dream, that's all."

Braska smiled. She could tell from the faint white flash of his teeth. "I couldn't sleep either," he admitted, pitching his voice low so as not to wake the others. "I feel... restless." She heard the rustle of cloth as Braska shifted on his bed. "Perhaps being this close to the Farplane is causing it. Maybe it calls to the spirits within my soul."

Rikku blinked and fisted the sheet in her hand. They had arrived in Guadosalam the afternoon before, but the Guado city was hardly welcoming. Many of the residents seemed to recognize Braska; the attention he garnered ranged from curious to hostile. Though, in all honesty, the mixed reception was better than the send-off they'd received in the Thunder Plains. Besides, the Guado behavior was nothing new – they simply hated tourists, and Summoner's parties were no exception.

Rikku could have cared less, though; much more important was the fact that the city was still standing. Sin hadn't attacked, as she'd feared. The entrance to the Farplane was still completely safe and intact and – as she'd discovered with some surprise – just as tightly guarded as "normal."

She didn't think it was very normal at all – but it was a clear reminder that the Guado were at the height of their cultural power and influence, having rejected the Church of Yevon's missionary overtures. Yet for all of Guadosalam's glory and pride, she couldn't help but view everything with a touch of sadness. The Ronso had almost completely destroyed the Guado race, decimating their remaining numbers in a war of attrition that lasted a full year after the start of Yuna's supposed "Eternal Calm."

One day, all of it would disappear; the proud mansion that housed Lord Jyscal's clan would be reduced to nothing more than Leblanc's glorified massage parlor, and the oddly decorated houses lining the street would morph into cheap tourist shops and tacky arcades. Still, the most important feature of Guadosalam would never change.

The Farplane was here, filled with its great emptiness, disquieting peace and hidden sorrows. For now, though – before the destruction of the Guado; before the integration of Guadosalam into the Church of Yevon – the Farplane was still jealously hoarded by its Guado caretakers. Travellers were allowed one visit, and one visit only; as such, Braska decided that they rest beforehand in order to make the most of the rare opportunity.

Rest. As if! Rikku rubbed her hand over her face. Well, there sure wouldn't be any more rest tonight – if her own nightmares hadn't ensured it, then the dulcet tones of Jecht's snoring did. Sweeping the covers aside, she eased out of her bed and tiptoed towards the door.

"Where are you going?" Braska asked, hearing her movement.

"Can't sleep, so I'm gonna take a hike," Rikku whispered. She heard more sounds of rustling and bit back a yelp when she felt him touch her elbow.

"Then, let us go together. There's no rest for me here tonight, either," Braska said, and Rikku bit back a sigh of disappointment. What she really wanted was to be alone, to mull over the meaning of her dream and its possible consequences. Were the Fayth trying to communicate with her, or was she letting her own fears plague her even in sleep? She let out her breath; either way, she couldn't find it in herself to turn Braska down. Considering the potency of her own dream, maybe it actually was her fault that he couldn't sleep either.

They exited the room as quietly as possible, blinking to adjust to the soft lighting of the inn's tiny hallway.

"Oh! You forgot your robe," Braska observed with some concern.

Rikku stared and tried to remember to close her jaw. "You forgot yours, too," she replied, her eyes wide. It wasn't so much the lack of formal summoning robes that surprised her, rather that Braska forgot his braid. Not that she could blame him; while keeping her own hair up made it easier to care for on the road, it did get a little itchy after a while. Guadosalam was also the first "comfortable" pit stop they'd reached since the start of the Pilgrimage. She stared at Braska's hair, which hung straight down his back, longer than her own and the color of burnished copper.

Noticing her scrutiny, Braska touched his head. "So I did. Is it a problem?"

Rikku shook her head. Just looking at Braska was making her own scalp itch, though. Decision made, she pulled off her bandana and let her hair down. "No, this is perfect! We'll tour the city incognito! If we both let our braids out, nobody'll recognize us!"

"I'm not sure it will be quite that easy to mask our presence here," Braska murmured, trying to stifle a laugh.

Ignoring him, Rikku struggled with the tangles in her unruly hair. "You could be a little more optimistic you know," she puffed as she worked. "It's not like we're famous here, right?"

Braska's snicker was lost to Rikku's yelp of pain. She winced as her fingers caught on a particularly nasty snarl while pulling at a bead decorating one of her braids.

"Wait."

Rikku felt another pair of hands join her own. Braska gave her a warm smile and continued to untangle her hair even after she froze.

"It will be faster if I help."

"Yeah," Rikku said and tried to ignore his knuckles brushing across her scalp. Instead, she concentrated on unravelling the braid in her hand as quickly as possible. In a matter of moments, it was done. Her own mop of hair would never be as smooth and well-behaved as Braska's, but it was still a relief to have it fall loosely around her ears. "Wow, I keep forgetting how long it's gotten," she giggled as she fluffed it out a few times.

Braska stepped back to admire her and feeling a little self-conscious, Rikku finished finger-combing through her hair and tied her bandana around her neck. The beads she slipped into an empty pocket. When she was done, she tilted her head and gave Braska a sassy grin. "How do you like me now?"

Braska opened his mouth but stopped, as if checking his words, and smiled at her. "It suits you very well." The smile faltered as his eyes moved down over her distinct travelling outfit. "But what of your robe?"

Rikku shrugged. "Do I really need it here? The Guado hate Yevonites just as much as they hate the Al Bhed. Besides, it won't matter once we cross the Moonflow." It was true; most people would be too busy eating, sleeping and dreaming about Blitzball to pay attention to anything but their favorite athletes. Even the Al Bhed team had earned its share of notoriety in Luca. Rikku guessed her appearance would be the least of their concerns; more likely than not it was Jecht's boundless enthusiasm that would prove their real problem. She smirked. More like Auron's problem.

Braska's uncertainty evaporated. "You're right," he agreed, his shoulders straightening. "We can be free, here, for tonight."

Rikku's grin spread and she hooked her elbow around his own, dragging him down the hall. "That's right! No Summoners and no Guardians. Just two people hanging out!" They spilled onto one of the sleepy town's thoroughfares, and she released Braska to run towards the edge of the road and drink in the sight. "I gotta hand it to the Guado: they sure do know how to decorate a place!"

Braska grinned as he joined her side. "I do not believe this is all the fruits of Guado architecture. Much of it seems to be the natural beauty of the cavern." His eyes drifted the source of most of the soft illumination in the city. "I could not imagine the gateway of the Farplane to be otherwise."

Rikku found her eyes drawn to the path as well, and the momentary exhilaration she'd felt at their escape faded away. That's the way home. If the Fayth won't take me back, then I've got to try here.

"Are you coming with us into the Farplane later?" Braska's question caught her by surprise and for a moment, she stared, convinced she'd been caught red-handed in her plan to bail out from his Pilgrimage. If flinging herself into the Farplane could be called much of a plan. Running away seemed more accurate.

"I... don't know, yet," Rikku answered, shifting her weight.

"I know the Al Bhed beliefs, Rikkma. It's quite all right if you wish to remain outside of the Farplane while we pay our respects."

Rikku glanced up at the path again, frowning. "We'll see when we get there, okay?" Memories of the dream tickled at her mind, and Rikku shrugged off the feeling of discomfort and foreboding that swept through her.

.x.x.x.

"Whoa, Blondie, ya let yer hair down!"

Rikku winced and gave a small wave towards Jecht, who was shambling down the path towards them. Auron followed him, his face devoid of expression as he watched her return from her stroll with Braska.

"Well, Braska did too, so it's okay, see?" Gathering her courage, she forced herself to meet Auron's gaze and was surprised when he broke contact first, turning his head away. Rikku did a double-take. Since when did she win stare-downs with Auron? The man didn't blink! It was like he wasn't even trying!

"It looks like you enjoyed yourselves," Auron told Braska.

A mental circuit fired in Rikku's head. She licked her lips in apprehension – she hadn't meant for it to look like she ditched the group to run off with Braska, even if that was what had happened. What she really wanted was a chance to think, to distance herself and gather the courage to do what she knew needed to be done at the Farplane. Braska's presence was more of an accident than a planned date. Why did Auron have to start getting sensitive now, of all times?

Rikku slapped herself mentally in the midst of trying to come up with a justification for her behavior that would ease the tension off his face. Why do I need to apologize to him? I'm going to be leaving anyhow. Maybe it's better like this. Still... The guilt gnawed at her with more persistence than a hungry Zanarkand monkey. An idea struck her, and Rikku directed a brilliant smile towards Auron.

"You should let your hair down too, you know!"

He looked at her in surprise before his face hardened into a more typical frown. "A warrior-monk never wears his hair loose."

"Oh, I think we can bend the rules a little, Auron," Braska interjected. "I don't believe the Guado will protest if you step out of uniform just for today."

Jecht joined the assault, always eager for opportunities to heckle Auron. "Just leave the Stiff alone. Auron knows he can't beat my good looks – we don't gotta rub it in."

Rolling his eyes upward, Auron let out a gusty sigh and reached behind his head. Rikku's breath caught as he pulled away the leather tie holding his hair back, sending dark waves spilling over his shoulders. It contrasted sharply against the paleness of his skin and the bright red of his coat. Jecht had it all wrong – with his hair down, Auron looked even more like a Blitzball star than ever before. It was too bad that he was crap at swimming.

"This is ridiculous," Auron grumbled, reaching to tie back his hair at the sound of Rikku's smothered laughter.

"No, don't do that! I like it! I was just thinking it's a good thing there aren't that many girls around." She smiled at Auron shyly.

"Yeah," Jecht laughed, "Otherwise Blondie here would have to spend all her free time beatin' down the competition, right?"

"Shut your mouth," Auron snapped at Jecht. He kept his hair down, though, and Rikku hid another smile behind a cough.

"So where are we going now?" she asked, stretching her arms over her head and popping her shoulders.

Braska studied their group, then shrugged. "We are together now... perhaps we should see the Farplane. It is still early enough to be free of most visitors."

"Farplane?" Jecht asked as they moved towards the winding pathway to their destination. "What's that?"

"It is the place where our dead come to rest," Braska explained as they walked. "One of the most important summoner's duties is to gather the remnants of deceased spirits and send them to the Farplane before they can be warped by hatred and envy."

"Warped?" Jecht asked. "How can ya warp a soul? And how d'ya know you're sending them spirits to the right place? How d'ya even know dead people got souls?"

Auron laughed. "To think the Church let us travel on a Pilgrimage." Sobering, he continued in a quieter voice as they passed two stern-looking Guado sentries. "Don't say such things loudly. Yevon would persecute you as a heretic, and rightly so."

"It is true, Jecht," Braska explained. "Even if you disagree with the Church and its teachings, the presence of deceased souls in Spira is unmistakable. The body is a husk for the soul, and when freed from that constraint, the soul is released to wander the earth. When I perform a Sending, I can feel them. As an observer, you, too, can see them – they take on the form of pyreflies."

"Pyreflies. You're kiddin' me. Those are dead people?" Jecht looked disturbed. "Blondie, tell me the truth here!"

Rikku sighed. "Even if Yevon gets most things wrong, they can be right about stuff sometimes."

"Alright, so they're dead people!" Jecht frowned. "Holy shit. But, 'ey... aren't fiends, y'know, made of them pyrefly-thingies?"

"Exactly," Braska replied. "That is why it is a Summoner's duty to ensure the peace of the newly departed by Sending them. Otherwise, a malcontent soul will be transformed into a fiend."

Jecht was silent for a few moments, digesting the information. He scratched his head. "Yeah, but... uh, if you know all this already, why are there still so many fiends wanderin' around everywhere?" Uncomfortable silence blanketed the group, and Jecht scowled. "What'd I say?"

"Sin," Rikku replied, letting anger seep into her voice at the reminder of what she had to do. "The fiends are there because of Sin."

The discussion died out as the swirling portal of cool light came into view, and Jecht let out a low whistle. "Damn. And we're gonna go inside of that?"

Rikku tuned out the chatter as Jecht peppered the others with questions about the Farplane, pyreflies, and "seeing dead people." Thoughts of her dream and the future crowded her head, and she was glad that her friends were occupied. Her steps slowed as she trailed to the side of the path, caught up in her own thoughts. Of condemning Auron to his death and Jecht to many long years of torture and suffering. Braska's sacrifice, both in his life and through his death. But what about Yuna's sacrifice? Was it any less important? Or was it even more important? Hers had led to a world without Sin. A world without Auron.

Rikku studied the man in question – he was arguing with Jecht, of course. She smiled; yes, her wish had come true. This wasn't her Auron – he was gone, never to return; she understood that now. But he, too, was Auron, perhaps even more real than the man she'd thought she'd loved. He was a real person, not just a mishmash of pyreflies, hopes and failed dreams. As if he could feel her stare, he met her eyes, brows drawing together. Rikku ducked his gaze. I need to let him go.

"Auron! Stop spacin' out on me, I was in the middle of talkin' to ya!"

Jecht's rough voice broke the spell, and Rikku winced... she'd let herself get trapped into thinking about Auron again – selfishly, she guessed Bahamut would say. And that's why you have to leave, Rikku. You have to. Her feet refused to move.

"You have decided not to come inside with us then?" Braska asked her.

"I – " Rikku stalled, fidgeting. She looked at the swirling portal of light.

"No... please, Rikkma. You don't have to force yourself to make a decision right now. I can see that you are not ready," Braska told her, grasping her shoulders.

Rikku's eyes snapped to Braska as his voice echoed Bahamut's dream words. A look of confusion passed over his face and he released her. "Please wait for us here." It sounded more like an order than a request, and Rikku frowned. "Jecht, Auron."

"So you just step through?" Jecht peered at the wall of light, tapping it with a fingertip. Ripples spread through the air where he touched. At Braska's nod, Jecht repressed his shudder, and – mumbling something about ghosts under his breath – leapt through the portal in one giant bound. Braska made to follow him but paused when he noticed that Auron wasn't moving.

"Auron?"

"I'll wait," Auron said. "Too many memories."

Braska nodded. "Very well. Stay here with Rikkma." That, too, sounded like a command, and Rikku felt her frown deepening. Was Braska really ordering Auron to keep an eye on her? And more importantly, why? Before she could question him, he inhaled sharply and disappeared into the portal. Silence descended, and Rikku scuffed the toes of her boots on the rocky ground.

"Say, Auron," she called out after a few uncomfortable moments. "Why'd you stay? They're only gonna let us in once. This is your big chance!"

Auron shook his head. "My chance for what? To see the faces of the men I've killed in the name of Yevon?"

Rikku winced. "... I guess I hadn't thought about it like that." She scuffed her toe into the ground again. "You're not mad at me, are you? I mean, for taking a walk with Braska earlier?"

Sighing, Auron leaned against the wall and met her gaze. "I said you'd have nothing to worry about from me."

"Really?" She crept towards him. " 'Cause I could be wrong about this, but you kinda looked a little pissed off there."

Auron shrugged. "Do what you like."

Rikku smirked and inched closer to him. "Some girls might take that as an invitation, you know."

His reaction wasn't the one she'd hoped for; instead of laughing – or even better, reciprocating – he glared at her. "But don't toy with him." He paused. "Or me."

Rikku felt her already short temper – which wasn't being helped along by her lack of sleep – flaring in indignation. "Maybe I wouldn't toy with you if you'd throw me a bone here! In case you haven't noticed, I like you. And I don't mean it in that 'Oh, you're a great guy' kind of way. I like like you! But sometimes it feels like you don't even care!"

Auron frowned, tightening his grip on his arms. "I refuse to be a replacement for – "

Rikku stomped her foot. "That's a cheap excuse you told me to stop using already. Why don't you take your own advice? I'm talking to you right now, not him!" She clapped a hand over her mouth after she finished blurting out her protest. Mostly out of shock, but also to hide the grin that was spreading across her face.

There. She'd done it. Auron would probably burst a blood vessel, most likely one of hers, if he suspected she was laughing at him now, of all times, but she couldn't push down the feeling of elation blossoming in her chest. She'd said it to his face. Him. He was not the Auron she had foolishly crushed on, not the enigmatic man that no one, not even Tidus, could read. Not this Auron. For once, she was taking a chance, stretching out, and putting her heart on the line – and for a real person this time.

Rikku swallowed and dropped her hand away from her mouth as the enormity of her proposal hit her. This Auron was not a romanticized construct of her own mind. This Auron could, and probably would, shoot her down at any moment. If there was one thing young Auron had in common with his older, deader self, it was a complete lack of interest in the opposite sex.

Auron simply sighed in response and refused to meet her eye, muttering something under his breath.

"What was that?" Rikku asked, planting her hands on her hips. Whether Auron was cold-blooded or not, everyone knew the first rule in the battle of the sexes was to never admit defeat. "If you're not interested in me, you only have to say it, you know." She decided not to mention that she wouldn't necessarily be inclined to listen to him.

If there was one thing she was learning, it was that time with Auron was a luxury she didn't have. Even now, Rikku knew what they did have was stolen from the future. That was what her nightmare had been trying to tell her, wasn't it? That it was okay to have a selfish dream. As long as you knew it was a dream and that one day, you'd have to wake up. So what if she was making him uncomfortable? If all she had was borrowed time, she'd stalk him if necessary.

Besides, time travel doesn't count as stalking, she exculpated. Relatively speaking, he was the one who was inconveniencing her, right?

"... it's acceptable," Auron said, still not facing her.

"What?" Rikku pulled herself out of her thoughts and struggled to make a connection. "Wait, say that again!" she demanded.

Was Auron... flushing? Huh. I guess he's not a graceful blusher, either, Rikku noted with a gleeful smirk. That, or the stone-faced Guardian was coming down with a mild skin rash. She held her tongue, enjoying his growing look of discomfort.

"Your hair. It looks... acceptable." He paused at Rikku's obvious hesitation. "Right now," he added, finally meeting her stare.

Rikku glowed under the compliment. "You like my hair down?" she asked, patting it self-consciously. Then her glow faded into indignation. "Wait, just acceptable? Is that the best you can do?" Life just wasn't fair, Rikku decided. Braska and Auron could put the best of Luca's Blitzball celebrities to shame just by letting their hair down, and all she got was an "acceptable." She scowled and crossed her arms.

"It looks better this way than that crow's nest you usually wear," he added with a slight hint of humor, refusing to give in to her pout. The smirk faded, but Auron didn't look away. "I think it makes you look more mature." He paused again and let his eyes flicker over her face, as if searching for something. "And more difficult to ignore."

"That's not a bad thing," she said, taking a few steps towards him, but stopped when he turned away.

"Braska noticed, too."

She frowned. "But I want you to notice." Her statement hung in the air, unchallenged, and she took a stab at the invisible wall standing between them. "You know, this morning... that wasn't something we planned. It was just a coincidence! I woke up early and so did Braska, and... and we both kind of decided to go out." Auron stiffened and she winced at her choice of words.

"Not like a date! Just to look around the city! I mean, if I wanted a date, I would've asked him. He just sorta came along, you know?" Hmm… this honesty stuff wasn't going quite as far as she'd hoped, judging from the expression on Auron's face.

"Rikku... you're not afraid of facing your feelings, are you?" Auron looked at her; the motion caused his hair to spill over his face, obscuring one eye.

She swallowed. "No."

He tilted his head towards the Farplane. "Then join Braska."

Rikku balled her hands into fists. "I think staying right here is acceptable, thank you very much." She took another few steps towards Auron and then hefted herself onto the ledge right next to him, grinning when he didn't shift away. "Besides... I'm not afraid of how I feel. That's why I'd rather be with you right now."

Auron said nothing, but she managed to invade his personal space without resistance. He still faced away from her, arms crossed, but some of the tension faded from his posture as she leaned first a shoulder, and then a cheek against his exposed back.

"You're a foolish girl," Auron told her gruffly, but allowed her to remain seated against him as he stared into the soft, liquid glow of the Farplane.

Rikku closed her eyes and ignored his words, choosing instead to soak in the warmth radiating from his body. This Auron was flesh and blood, no matter how cold he sounded. Contentment flooded her as she pressed an ear against his coat, trying to find the beat of his heart. She let herself be lulled by the gentle sound of his steady breathing and the soft, distant hum of the Farplane.

Nothing's stopping you from going back right now.

Rikku squeezed her eyes together and moved her head just enough to brush the fabric of Auron's coat with her lips. She inhaled deeply, relishing the musky scent of the sweat-stained garment. Traces of ozone and the faintest whiff of Macalania's forests mixed in with the smell that was uniquely Auron, and Rikku had to stop herself from reaching out to grip it and clutch it to her chest – particularly since Auron was still wearing the garment.

Maybe it's selfish, but this is my dream.

She didn't know how much time passed as she half-dozed, free of her worries and content to just be in that moment. Auron remained silent but she could tell from the soft, steady pull of his breath that he wasn't sleeping. Did he feel the satisfaction she did? Did being so near bring him the same comfort? Rikku didn't want to ask.

Instead, she kept her eyes closed and allowed herself to picture Auron's face, smoothing away the worry lines that usually marked his face. Reaching up, she grabbed a strand of his hair and cracked an eye open.

"Can I have this?" she asked.

Auron grunted in response, not bothering to turn around, and Rikku took that as a sign of acceptance. With a sharp jerk, she pulled the hair free of his head.

Auron twitched in pain and sat up, causing Rikku to lose her balance. He turned around and glared, and Rikku giggled as she twined the hair around her finger. "Something to remember you by," she murmured, tucking it safely away in one of her pockets.

Opening his mouth, Auron seemed like he was about to say something. He changed his mind, however, after looking at her closely. "I'm still here," he replied, searching her face.

As long as you remember you have to wake up someday.

Rikku couldn't bring herself to reassure him with a smile, and instead looked at the Farplane. "I – " she started, and then stopped, squinting at the portal as two nebulous shadows formed behind the barrier. "I think they're back," she finished, pointing.

Jecht's voice bounced over the steps, too loud in Rikku's ears as he exited the Farplane. "... besides my old man! It's cool and all, but I didn't see anyone I knew!"

Braska was right behind him, his modulated voice more muted than usual. "You should be thankful that you have known so little loss in your Zanarkand." He paused on the steps, catching sight of Rikku and Auron sitting together, and stared for a moment before continuing his descent.

Rikku bit her lip and glanced at Auron, whose brow had creased. She hopped off of the ledge and watched Braska approach. He looked even more tired than he had during their trek through the snowfields. Even Jecht caught on to the mood and fell silent.

"He saw Raenn," Auron supplied under his breath, and Rikku nodded her head in acknowledgement.

She tensed when Braska stopped before her to study her face. He said nothing, and she fidgeted under his piercing gaze. "Umm, Braska?" Why was he just standing there? It was the same as in the agency before – almost as if he was looking through her.

Without warning, Braska reached out and caught a lock of her hair. He smiled faintly before releasing it, although his eyes remained cool and icy.

"Put your hair back up, Rikkma." Once again, it sounded like an order, not a request.

Rikku bit back the feeling of hurt that sprung up in her chest as Braska started his return towards Guadosalam without even acknowledging her. He'd withdrawn from them, though it didn't take a genius to figure out why. Heck, even Jecht could understand what was bothering Braska right now.

"So, do these Guado have any good pubs we could hit before we go?" Jecht asked, breaking the silence.

Or maybe not, Rikku amended as she spun away from them to separate a few long strands of her hair. She ignored Auron as he brushed by, choosing instead to stay behind and re-do her hairstyle. The Farplane was bringing out the best in everybody, and all she really wanted at the moment was the same thing she had that morning – to be left alone.

.x.x.x.

Auron scowled as he left Rikku behind, catching up to Jecht. "Searching for a pub here would be inappropriate behavior, even for someone like you."

" 'ey! Whaddaya mean, 'someone like me?' I'm just a simple guy lookin' for a good time!" Jecht shrugged. "You need to lighten up, man."

Auron sucked in his breath to reply, but Braska stopped him. "Let him go," he said. "You have my permission to leave, Jecht. Do what you like, so long as you rejoin us by this evening."

"Hah! Looks like you lost this match, pal!" Jecht waved triumphantly as he jogged back towards the city – a disgruntled Auron and an unnaturally calm Braska left behind.

"My lord!" Auron sputtered, turning to Braska with a look of complete disbelief. "Why did you give that fool permission to drink himself into a stupor? He'll only embarrass – "

Braska waved his hand, silencing Auron's protest with a shake of his head. "You do not understand. Jecht needs this."

"Of course he needs this!" Auron exploded. "He's a drunkard! He'll always need to drink!" Taking a deep breath, Auron pinched the bridge of his nose and forced himself to calm down. "I understand if you're upset with us, but that's no reason to allow Jecht to run wild."

Braska's expression flickered; his voice was weary, but with an air of long-suffering patience, he strove to answer Auron. "As much as he likes to hide it, Jecht is also only human. He misses his family."

Auron grimaced. "What family? I and half of Guadosalam heard Jecht's claim that he didn't see anyone he recognized in there." He crossed his arms.

Braska offered him a small, humorless smile. "All the more reason to miss his family, would you not say?" Though his tone was mild, Braska's words were blunt, his posture stiff. Auron remained silent, and Braska sighed with exasperation. "Let him go. It would be better for Jecht to attempt to overcome his sorrow in a place less steeped in them."

"... and what if he doesn't?" Auron said it as more than mere possibility. "Are we to allow him to drink his way through the rest of this Pilgrimage?"

"Jecht is stronger than you think," Braska snapped. "He will overcome this in time."

"Perhaps," Auron said, and Braska fell silent at the unvoiced accusation of hypocrisy. Just like you recovered from Raenn's death? A tense moment stretched between the two; they both kept their gaze away from Rikku, who hadn't followed them.

Auron capitulated first. He sighed and rubbed an uneasy hand through his hair, scooping it back up into its usual ponytail. "This is ridiculous." Looking at Braska, his deep frown eased along with his tone, losing much of its anger. "All of Spira is steeped in sorrow. Leaving the walls of Guadosalam won't allow Jecht to escape it any more than finding solace in a bottle would."

Some of the stiffness faded from Braska's posture; the corners of his mouth were pulling into a wry grin. "It is strange, but I had always thought I would be happier to hear you standing up to me." He looked over his shoulder at Rikku, who was bent away from them. She was struggling with her wild hair, and the faint hint of amusement left his expression. "Sometimes we need to forget, no matter what the price may be."

Auron allowed himself to follow Braska's example, watching Rikku. The illumination of the Farplane cast a bluish halo around her while at the same time encasing her body in shadows. He was reminded of the Espada, of the contrast of harsh sun glinting off bright snow against the strange creature's light-absorbing form.

Watching her, Auron understood they were arguing over more than Jecht's drinking habits; he'd let himself be goaded into making a choice regarding the girl. A choice that didn't suit Braska, even if the other man had been doing much of the goading.

A stab of uncertainty plagued him, and Auron grimaced in displeasure at the unfamiliar feeling. His life had always been lived on the principles of certainty – he knew who he was, what he believed in and where he was going. Those things were crumbling now, like sandcastles washed away in high tide. They had been since his fall from Yevon's grace, but meeting Rikku transformed slow erosion into a cascading avalanche.

Maybe it was no coincidence that she looked so like the fiend that had nearly destroyed them in the snowfields of Macalania. She might succeed where the Espada had failed. He looked away and focused on Braska.

"I am not angry at either of you," Braska said. "Rikkma cares deeply for you." A long, pained silence hung in the air, and Auron hid his wince. Braska's sandcastles were also crumbling into dust, creating a strange dichotomy in his usually placid demeanor. "You do not have to be ashamed of your own feelings for her," he said so softly that Auron almost missed the words. "People cannot control whom they choose to love."

Love? Auron flinched at the word and Braska's head jerked up; with a start, he realized Braska had been talking to himself. The other man gathered his composure and smoothed his face into its usual smile, as though they had not been arguing just moments before. "It is not something you should fear, and it is your choice this time. You have nothing to lose if you will admit you can have feelings. In fact, you have everything to gain."

And there it was; perhaps the one force that could stop the turmoil Rikku had released from destroying their small party. But it was only Braska, their Summoner, who was strong enough to harness it – the one thing he clung to more tightly than his own grief.

Duty.

Auron's uncertainty faded into a sharp spike of anger. He held onto it for as long as he could, because it was marginally better than the shame.

"My feelings?" Auron closed his expression. "My feelings don't matter, and neither do hers. What matters is the Pilgrimage – "

"No," Braska said vehemently. "Love is what matters. It is the one thing that gives Spira strength. Not the Pilgrimages, nor the Summoners..." He paused to catch his breath. "Love is what allows people to continue living in this world of Sin – what gives people their true hope. Love of life, of this world, even of self – but most of all love for others. My love for Raenn is what makes this Pilgrimage possible."

Auron looked at Braska, his expression hard. "And love for Rikkma could end it," he answered. "Yours or mine... it doesn't really matter, does it?"

Braska's lips twitched into a bitter smile. "Always blunt, aren't you? I'm not ashamed of my own feelings, either. But I know what I need to do. Nothing will deter me from that path. You, on the other hand..." His face softened. "Auron, you will have your whole life ahead of you when we have completed our journey. Do you really want to spend the rest of that life alone?"

"Do you think me blind? I'm your Guardian before I'm your friend," Auron countered. "My job is to protect you from harm, not to be the cause of it."

Braska pursed his lips together and resumed his slow pace down the rocky corridor. "That is exactly your problem. You still have not fully understood which of your two roles is more important." He spoke carefully, as though forming the words were difficult. "I am asking you to follow your heart as a friend."

"And as your Guardian, I'm refusing," Auron replied.

"One day you might realize that you do not have the power to make that choice," Braska chided him.

.x.x.x.

There was a definite difference between wanting a little alone time and being left in the dust, Rikku thought with a touch of annoyance. She sprinted down the pathway, still struggling to scoop her unruly hair into its trademark ponytail. "Hey, wait you guys!" she called out, tripping over her feet as a chunk of hair fell into her eyes.

Auron and Braska faced her; it looked like she was interrupting some sort of discussion. Jecht, of course, was nowhere to be seen; apparently, the speed of his gait was directly proportional to the amount of bars in the vicinity.

Braska bestowed a mild smile upon Rikku when she came to a stop beside them. "Rikkma. I must apologize for my rudeness just now. My request was very selfish."

Rikku blinked at Braska's phrasing and glanced at Auron, who ignored her and looked in the opposite direction. Just as well, Rikku thought; being able to look this Auron in the face wouldn't make her decision any easier. She took a deep breath, oblivious to the tension between the two men as she waded through her own jumbled thoughts.

It's now or never.

Steeling herself, Rikku looked Braska squarely in the eye.

"Braska... I want to stay here a little longer. Will it be alright if I meet you back at the inn later? There's something I need to do."

Braska looked surprised at her request. "Something you need to do? Did you change your mind about the Farplane?"

Rikku nodded. "I have to see if I can face my own memories," she supplied, almost managing to keep her voice from quavering. Not enough, however, as Auron gave her a perturbed look over his shoulder.

Braska's expression softened. "So you'll be leaving us, then?" he asked, and Rikku couldn't help but shiver at his choice of words.

"I..." She swallowed, feeling Auron's eyes boring into her. "I just want to see," she mumbled.

"Ah," Braska said. Then he gave her a genuine, heartbreaking smile. "We will be at the inn until tomorrow morning. Take as long as you need." With a short bow, he continued down the passage. Auron held back, still staring at Rikku.

"How long will you need?" he asked, searching her face. She could tell what he was really asking: are you leaving us?

Rikku hesitated. Even if it was time for her dream to end, she couldn't just go without saying some sort of goodbye. Not now, when she'd finally managed to steal a little piece of happiness for herself.

"I don't know," she admitted. "But if I'm not back by tomorrow morning, don't wait up for me."

For once, Auron didn't grow angry, as she expected him to. Instead, he looked grim. "Braska already knows you're planning to leave us, doesn't he?"

Rikku shook her head in denial. "I don't know. I mean I don't want to, but I – "

Auron cut her off. "No. Don't tell me. Do what you need to do."

Rikku gaped. "What, no arguments? Since when did you get so understanding, huh? What exactly did Braska say to you anyway?"

Auron sighed and passed a hand over his eyes. After a moment's pause, he answered her. "Sometimes... we need to put friendship over duty." He dropped his palm and gave her a hard look. "Go, then. Do whatever it is that you need to."

Rikku stared at him. "I'm sorry."

Auron studied her for a moment longer. "I need to be with Braska now," he answered. "But I'll wait for you, Rikku."

She watched him walk away. "I'll wait for you," he had said. Not "we'll wait for you." Just I. Auron.

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

23: Plant Plié

Rikku loitered at the end of the path, trying to decide whether the heaviness in her stomach was the result of guilt or relief – or maybe just the Guado spicy bread she had earlier. Sucking in her breath, she marched towards the portal leading into the Farplane.

Even in the past, it looked the same as ever – a red stone hexagon etched into Guadosalam's darkened walls, surrounded by mist and pyreflies. Six cloudy windows surrounded the portal that framed the doorway into another dimension; it was a work no mortal hand could have created, and yet somehow it was too perfect to have been achieved by nature alone.

It was as though the gateway itself was summoned into existence – but no one could answer the question of how it came to be. According to legends, the gateway had existed long before the art of Summoning. The Farplane was eternal, an ancient and sacred place even in Shuyin and Lenne's era a thousand years ago. The portal was as much a part of Spira as its sky and seas. Perhaps it was the Farplane itself that had created the Summoners, and not the other way around.

All too suddenly, Rikku's feet carried her to the entrance of Spira's eternal mystery. She shook her head and tried to remind herself of Al Bhed lore – that the Farplane was nothing more than the home of the pyreflies, that it wasn't truly a bridge between the world of the living and the dead. Then she let out a soft sigh. Who am I kidding? I don't believe those teachings anymore. She thought of Braska, of even Yuna's unshakable faith despite everything the other girl knew and had seen.

I guess even Al Bhed can be wrong sometimes. We really do let our pride blind us, don't we? The portal seemed to sigh and ripple in response, pyreflies dancing around her. Souls, she'd told Jecht when he'd asked; she believed that now. They were souls, releasing their sorrows as they sang nostalgic memories of their forgotten lives, searching for someplace to call a home, waiting to be reborn.

She stared into the swirling light, then reached out and touched the barrier. It pulsed under her palm, scattering fractured rays of light into the air. A wave of dizziness hit her, along with a tickling sensation. It's not cold like before. Bright colors beckoned to her, and every sense was singing with anticipation. If I could just break through, she thought to herself with a sudden, almost violent need. Somehow, she knew everything would be okay in the Farplane; every mistake she made, every question and uncertainty she felt would be set to rights. There would be no more doubting, no worrying about Sin's attacks, Jecht's drinking habits, Braska's depression, or even Auron's temper –

Warmth, and the steady beat of a heart against her cheek.

Rikku's certainty wavered, but the feeling of rightness pulled at her again, and she shook her head.

"This is what I want. This is what Spira needs."

Her words cut through the silence with startling clarity. Rikku really didn't enjoy the sound of her own voice, despite Brother's petulant claims to the contrary. She thought it too childish; she couldn't manage Lulu's smooth, throaty timber without sounding like she had a terrible chest cold, and she didn't even bother trying to emulate Yuna's musical, breathy pitch. But somehow, hearing her own imperfect voice echoing in her ears broke the incessant need to pass through the barrier. If everything was right behind it, why did her voice still sound so wrong?

The nostalgia and contentment the Farplane brought to its visitors was no surprise to Rikku, though she was uneasy at their intensity. Still – everyone felt the pull to some extent when surrounded by the otherworldly atmosphere. Despite the sensations it evoked, however, people always said something was slightly off about it. Beautiful as it was, most visitors were eager to leave when they finished paying their respects.

Here, though, it was different. The Farplane's call felt perfect; there was no longing to return to the real world. It was as though the slight oddness, the strange dichotomy between comfort and alienation had vanished completely. In fact, being this close to the portal made Rikku feel as though the rest of the world was off, rather than the Farplane itself: like putting on a pair of glasses and seeing the world come into focus for the first time. Only it wasn't her sight that had sharpened, but her feelings.

It's like... coming home. The way Home had felt, before Yevon had blown it to bits. Or maybe the way the Celsius felt, after all the time she'd spent on it as a Gullwing. With a sudden pang, Rikku realized how much she missed her Brother's scolding, Buddy's even-tempered interventions, and even Shinra's boasting.

The Farplane's entrance churned, jagged streaks of shadow trailing after her fingers where they penetrated the light, reflecting and amplifying her own doubts. Rikku frowned; why was she hesitating? She stared into the now-murky depths of the portal. The sense of longing fought for dominance over her newfound reluctance.

Because he's waiting for you. The darkness in the portal spread, mingling with the clear light and turning it into a distorted swirl of grey clouds. "I can't be of two minds," Rikku mumbled. That was what Auron had told her, wasn't it? To choose one path and to follow it. Wasn't that exactly what she was forcing Auron to do? To choose between protecting Braska and pursuing her? Between his feelings as a Guardian and her desire for his affection?

She thought of Auron as she'd known him during Yuna's Pilgrimage; he had possessed a dedication to duty that would have impressed his younger self. She wondered if Auron would recognize who he'd become in the future, if he could know. The thought of Auron meeting himself stilled her confusion.

No... he wouldn't be surprised, Rikku concluded with reluctance. I keep trying to fool myself but in the end, they're the same person.

Steeling herself, Rikku leaned into the portal. The warmth blanketed her as it never had before, and a small sigh of release escaped from her lips.

Is this what it's like when you die? Is this what he felt that time? No wonder he didn't want to stay with the rest of us.

Something warm traced a path down her cheek, tickling the side of her nose. Rikku's tongue darted out and met with the taste of salt. She realized with some surprise that both of her cheeks were wet.

Why am I crying? It's just the Farplane!

But it wasn't; she was drowning in emotions. The Farplane was turning every stray thought she had into powerful feelings that assaulted her. She couldn't shake the image of him turned away from them, gruff and tired, his graying hair bathed in the light of Sin's destruction even as his soul dissolved into pyreflies before her very eyes and he never looked back, not even once –

A familiar whistle filled Rikku's ears, one that was steadily growing louder.

I've heard this before. It's like pyreflies screaming...

The whistle became a roar, and Rikku recognized it as the faint strains she'd heard in the Farplane Wind she'd pulled from the Espada. But the strand was only a simple melody; the Farplane itself was pure, orchestrated chaos. Despite the screaming in her ears there was no discomfort. It was the direct opposite of the painful, abrupt shock she'd felt before the Chamber of the Fayth; if anything, the cries were almost seductive, hypnotizing her with its pull.

The Legendary Guardian hadn't looked back, not for Yuna, not even for Tidus. But the young man who had yet to fill that role, the man with the smooth-skinned face and two eyes had sought her out in the darkness of Guadosalam, had told her he would wait for her.

Scared, Rikku tried to pull back. Maybe Bahamut was right; maybe she wasn't ready yet. Her hand, though, refused to cooperate, no matter how much she tugged. A spike of panic shot through her and she stopped fighting.

"Let me go," she demanded, as though the Farplane itself was a living entity. There was no answer but her body remained stationary, arm outstretched, even as her mind raced. Then she felt it; a change in the song of the pyreflies, a presence she was coming to know all too well.

Bahamut! Rikku whipped her head around, searching for the usual manifestation, but all she saw nothing. "You're not going to hold me here! Not this time!" Gritting her teeth, Rikku struggled against her partial-paralysis. With enough effort, she could shift her body forward, but it still felt like she was trying to wade through Wakka's hair gel. Experimentally, Rikku pushed her weight backwards; movement was easier when she stopped trying to force her way into the Farplane. Frustrated, Rikku focused instead on dropping her hand.

As if sensing her capitulation, the hold on her body eased, and Rikku grimaced. It wasn't very fun being held hostage by an aeon, and not even knowing how or why he was doing it. As soon as she could move, her hand darted to her belt. It was a long shot, but Rikku remembered the shock she'd experienced the first time she used it in Bevelle – the white lightning that had raced through her veins. If the pain it caused was the exact opposite of the warmth and comfort of the Farplane, then maybe it was just what she needed to shock herself out of Bahamut's grasp. It's time this rotten luck started working for me, Rikku thought as she launched herself forward and activated the grid.

She wasn't disappointed; a jolt shot through her fingers, a sharp stab of pain that would have made her scream if she could move her jaws. It worked, it worked! She opened her watering eyes as she fell through the wall of light and watched the ground rise up to meet her –

– and pulled up short, her mouth twisted open in a cry of surprise as her body was suspended mid-step. Even her hair had stopped falling around her face; she was tilted at an angle that by all rights should have had her face-planting into the ground. But she wasn't falling; she was frozen. She couldn't even move her eyeballs to look to either side. And, Rikku realized, she didn't need to, because the body of a small, ancient child appeared before her.

"Bahamut!" she yelled. Or at least, she tried to. All she managed to do was stare at a point a few centimeteres below Bahamut's hooded face, since she couldn't even roll her eyes upwards to look him in the – hood, most likely. No one even knew if his human form had eyes.

I told you not to come here. She wondered how he managed to sound scolding despite the monotone of his voice.

She felt the muscles on her face relax, and fixed her glare on Bahamut's face. "What about Spira? You know, it's not like I could be changing the fate of the rest of the world or anything, huh!"

You really believe yourself so important? he answered her.

Rikku felt her anger boiling over, even as his words hit her pride with a stinging slap. "So what if I'm not Yuna?" she snapped. "That doesn't mean you can play around with my life! What kind of sick joke is this? Why are you doing this to me?"

Bahamut paused before answering her; he sounded almost amused, if that was possible. Still thinking of only yourself, even now? Perhaps your hubris makes you who you are.

At least I'm alive, she wanted to spit back. But she couldn't. She couldn't even look him in the non-eyes. Rikku wondered if there was a special hell for Al Bhed heretics who talked back to god-like aeons. If there wasn't, Bahamut would probably make one just for me. Maybe I'm there right now.

Go back and join them, he said. You must see this through to the end. This journey was your own wish; don't run away. Be strong enough to live your dream.

Her anger was subsiding, replaced by a sense of shame. He was right, she realized – everything that had happened was only what she'd wanted; to feel important, to have Auron look at her with something more than irritation. In her attempt to run away from her own life and live in her regrets for the past, she'd forgotten to embrace the future. She hasn't realized what a stupid wish it was, and now Bahamut wasn't going to let her have a take-back. With a sinking sensation, she put up a last feeble protest. "But I can't. I can't face them like this!"

You don't have a choice anymore. He was growing brighter as he said that; it hurt to see, and Rikku cringed, ducking away from the light and shielding her eyes. In that moment she realized she could control her body again and whipped her head forward.

"Wait – !"

The two Guado sentries standing before her spun around, lances at the ready, and eyed her suspiciously. One leaned over and mumbled something to the other in the native Guado tongue, and Rikku didn't need to be trilingual to know that he hadn't said anything complimentary. With a laugh, the two guards turned around and ignored her.

Straightening out of her crouch, Rikku realized that was probably a good thing. She couldn't spare the time to be embarrassed at her sudden appearance at the entrance to the path leading to the Farplane; more pressing was the question of how she'd gotten there. She hadn't even felt anything; one minute she was shooting the mental breeze with Bahamut in the Farplane, and the next she was being laughed at by the guards in Guadosalam.

Turning around, Rikku looked at the path to the portal – now calm and no longer murky – and let out a slow, irritated huff. "Well... that was an aeon-sized door slam if I ever saw one," she muttered, adjusting her braids. Lifting her chin and doing her best to ignore the smirking Guado, Rikku marched past the guards and towards the city. There really was only one place to go – back towards the inn.

"No use crying over spilled milk," she told herself. "Besides, he's waiting for me, right?"

She almost thought she could hear Bahamut laughing and tried to ignore it as she stomped down the pathway. Me and my stupid dreams. Why couldn't I just let go?

Suddenly, seeing Auron didn't seem as exciting of a prospect as it had before; in fact, the entire city of Guadosalam was losing its fascination. The sleepy twilight of the underground cavern made her restless; the walls were too close, the lichen lights too wane, the air too rank. More than ever, she felt a need to see sunlight, to have fresh wind blowing in her hair and burning sand stretching before her. Rikku was tired of the burden of the Pilgrimage. Her Al Bhed blood was calling to her, demanding freedom, and the urge to run away was overwhelming.

Pivoting on her feet, Rikku strode down another path that she hoped would lead to a release from the tightness that gripped her chest.

.x.x.x.

Dappled sunlight shone through the dense canopy. Auron was the first to emerge from the roots of the giant tree that housed the entrance to Guadosalam, his expression solemn and his head lowered. Even so, the contrast of the bright sunlight after so much time traveling in darkness was painful, and he raised an arm before his face. When he lowered his hand, blinking, he saw her and slowed to a stop.

Rikku kicked her boots against the root she was sitting on. "Finally leaving?"

Auron squinted up at her with an inscrutable look on his face; somewhere, Rikku hoped that unfamiliar expression was hosting more than just surprise. Maybe... he was even a little relieved? No, Rikku decided, quashing her fledgling hopes. To assume anything Auron didn't give away was just inviting trouble, she knew all too well. Still, he wasn't scolding her, so Rikku took that as a good sign.

When he started moving again, it was towards her. He stopped at the base of the high root she was dangling off of, and a few of the tense lines around his mouth and eyes eased as he nodded at her.

A warm feeling flooded Rikku, and she found herself grinning back at him. "So, umm, hi," she said softly.

"So here you are," Auron replied, as if to confirm that she wouldn't turn around and high-tail it into the forest at the sound of his voice.

Rikku smirked. "Like gum stuck to the bottom of your shoe," she answered.

Ignoring her, he stepped closer with an intense look. Rikku swallowed; it was almost easier to face Auron when he was annoyed, as he usually was when dealing with her. This, though... this wasn't his angry face. His eyes, she noted, were still piercing, even when charged with an emotion other than rage or frustration. He lifted his hand halfway towards her, and then seemed to check himself.

"Lord Braska – " he began with a slight frown. The hesitation passed almost as quickly as it came, leaving Rikku to wonder if she imagined the whole thing. And then, he smiled at her. Auron smiled. At her.

Rikku nearly fell off of the tree root.

"... Lord Braska is helping Jecht," Auron continued, ignoring Rikku's scrabbling attempts to recover and lower herself to the ground. "He'll be here soon, so perhaps you'd care to... prepare yourself." The last line was delivered with a definite tone of amusement, as he relented and assisted Rikku in her ungraceful slide towards the forest floor.

"I totally meant to do that," she said as she failed to lower her skirt, which had ridden high. It was hard to maneuver when Auron was still holding her securely in his arms.

"Al Bhed fashion," Auron muttered with a derisive snort, though she didn't miss the glint in his eyes. "Function before form, was it?"

Rikku huffed. "Bevellian silk would've ripped, I'll have you know."

"More's the pity," Auron mumbled, leaving Rikku to gape.

As if on cue, there was a loud grunt, and Rikku peeked around Auron and saw them – Braska slowly trudging out of the cave, and Jecht, leaning on him. The summoner's slight frame was bent under the other man's weight. Stopping when he saw them, Braska lost his precarious balance and nearly fell over.

"Rikkma? We thought you had left us last night." His jaw shut with an audible click. "I-I can see you are somewhat… engaged… with Auron right now, but if you could spare a moment – ugh!" He cut off abruptly, trying to keep Jecht from tipping over.

Face burning crimson, Rikku struggled out of Auron's arms and righted her clothing before scurrying to Braska's side. "Why aren't you helping?" she called out to Auron. "Aren't you like, I don't know, Mister Perfect Guardian all the time? Don't you think this counts as one of your duties?"

Auron shrugged, the humor in his eyes fading into a less alien expression of annoyance. "Having to bear Jecht's weight is hardly a life-threatening activity."

Jecht chose that moment to burp wetly and covered his mouth, and Braska winced. Rikku's steps slowed down; listening to the rest of Auron's argument seemed like a really good idea. Her boots were white, after all; and, if she could help it, they'd stay that way. "Oh, uh, so, you got that covered all by yourself then, Braska?"

"Not really," Braska grunted, hefting Jecht upright.

"Don't help him," Auron snapped, freezing Rikku in surprise as she reached out to lend a hand. Braska met Auron's gaze and the two began a staring contest that was punctuated by Jecht's snores.

"Wait, so do you actually want me to help out or not?" she blurted in exasperation as tension crackled between the two men.

Auron sighed and broke off the staring contest to address her. "I suppose you could say Braska and I are trying to teach each other a lesson." He stopped and watched the two men fumbling towards him.

Rikku let out a loud sigh. "Guys, this is stupid." Then, cautiously – because she really was serious about keeping her boots white – she leveled a sharp kick at Jecht.

"OWW!" the huge man roared, shoving off of Braska and flailing. He spun into a patch of bright sunlight and collapsed in a messy pile of limbs onto the ground. After a few moments of groaning, Jecht raised a meaty palm over his face to block the glare. "Whoa, tell somebody to turn off the lights," he mumbled before dropping his arm over his eyes.

Rikku winced. "Uhh... that didn't work out like I planned." She kneeled by Jecht's side to help him up and regretted it when she caught a whiff of his breath. Braska inhaled that at close range? His respect points just went up about 300 percent! Pinching her nose shut with two fingers, Rikku tried to breathe through her mouth.

"Ewww! Gross! Have you been marinating yourself in alcohol?" She scrambled to her feet. Jecht was hardly in a state to answer her, mumbling something incoherent under his breath; it really wasn't worth making an effort to understand what he was saying. She was too glad that his head was pointing towards the ground while he was saying it. Instead, she looked to Braska for an explanation. "Why do you put up with this?"

Braska studied her with an odd expression. "You sound like Auron." It shifted into a heartfelt, if somewhat reserved smile. "We all struggle with our demons," he told her as he knelt beside her and reached for Jecht.

How does he do that? Rikku wondered as she sucked in her breath and dutifully shouldered some of Jecht's weight. With just a few simple words, Braska made her feel guilty for not putting up with Jecht's 80-proof cabbage-wilting breath. As they grappled with the drunk man, she noticed that Auron was still watching them with disinterest, rather than joining the cause. "Why aren't you helping now?" she asked.

"It's not Auron's duty to help," Braska replied, his expression closing.

Auron stiffened and shook his head. "The best way to help Jecht is to keep moving. He'll walk it out of his system." He turned around and strolled away from them.

The nerve of that guy – !

Rikku raised a hand. At least, she tried to; Jecht stumbled, and both she and Braska grunted as they caught him. "You need to go on a diet," she complained. "Hey, Auron! Little problem with your plan there. How can he walk it out of his system if he can't, you know, walk?"

"Where there's a will, Yevon will provide a way," Auron answered smugly.

"Yevon?" Rikku scowled. "I don't look like Yevon. Hey Braska, do you look like Yevon?" Without waiting for an answer she continued talking, pitching her voice louder. He was making communication difficult by quickening his pace to stay ahead. Not that it was very hard when they were wrestling with a near-comatose Jecht. Maechon could probably outpace them at the rate they were going.

"Wait! Come back! Our girly-muscles can't carry Jecht! This should be your job!" she railed.

"Girly?" Braska mumbled under his breath. "You think I look like a woman, Rikkma?"

Rikku weighed the benefits of screaming out her frustration before deciding it would only cause her to inhale too much of Jecht's tainted air. "Don't jump to conclusions just because you wear your hair longer than mine!"

"You do," Braska concluded in dismay, and Rikku sagged under his disgruntlement. Literally, as the brunt of Jecht's bulk leaned into her side. Jecht's groggy head lolled onto her shoulder, and Rikku received a full frontal blast when he belched directly into her face.

Oh, forget it. I didn't really need a supply of fresh air anyway. "Hey hey hey!" she yelled to Braska as she shoved Jecht back over, her voice shrill. "Focus on Jecht right now!"

"Try not to let him get his hands on anything else to drink while I scout ahead," Auron added, scanning the forest before them. "I can keep the fiends from doing any damage, but I can't stop Jecht from creating his own problems."

"Great, who's the babysitter now?" Rikku scowled.

"I ain't no baby..." Jecht mumbled, drifting in and out of consciousness.

"Jecht is hardly a child," Braska concurred, and Rikku hid her expression. Why does he always have to be so responsible? Jecht smelled like the ass he currently was, and not even Braska's principles could carry him far enough away to ignore it. She opened her mouth to say as much when suddenly Jecht's weight shifted and she found herself supporting far more of it than before. Grunting, she looked up from the sudden onslaught, only to find Braska standing in front of her and rolling his shoulders.

"He only resorts to drinking as a method of escape," Braska told her in the same effable tone. Rikku didn't like the look of his placid smile. Well, theoretically, it wasn't any different than his normal smile, but the fact that he wasn't holding Jecht up anymore was setting off all sorts of alarms. "What he really needs is someone to cheer him up. Someone with a bright and lively personality."

Rikku blinked. He can't be serious. "You can't be – "

"... speaking of you? Why, yes, Rikkma. That is precisely what I was thinking as well. So, please – do your best!" Braska walked away from them as quickly as his robes would allow.

"Hey! HEY! Where do you think you're going?" she called out after him.

"It would be irresponsible to let Auron scout alone."

Dimly, she noted that for wearing a multitude of floor-sweeping robes, Braska could move pretty fast when he wanted to. Jecht chose that moment to let out another burp, and Rikku panicked.

"HEY! Wait just a minute! I'm Auron's fiend-kicking partner, not you! HEY! Don't leave me here with him!"

Braska and Auron were out of sight by the time Rikku managed to close her working jaw. "Oh well... I guess this is my punishment for letting them think I was leaving," she sighed. "Come on, stinky. It's just you and me for now."

.x.x.x.

"We're getting nowhere fast," Rikku mumbled, wiping some sweat from her brow. She leaned back and took a long drink of water from her flask, eyeing the slumbering man from the corner of her eye. Auron and Braska had been true to their word so far; not a single fiend had yet dared disturb them on the forest path. Still, even with the lack of fighting, traveling was anything but easy. Jecht was heavy and more than once, Rikku wondered if she should don a dressphere to ease the journey.

She toyed with her belt and looked down the path. What if Auron comes back?

Jecht let out another loud snore, and Rikku groaned. "If we don't catch up with him soon, he will have to come back." She looked at her sphere grid. "Please, please, please don't hurt, okay?" Then she fingered the dressphere one last time before activating it.

As the familiar light washed over her, she felt her thoughts darkening. This was a terrible idea. She spun, her hand reaching out and grasping the sword that materialized in her palm. Then, with a heavy sigh, she planted it into the ground before her, eying Jecht with muted disgust while shaking the cherry blossom petals out of her hair. "Wake up."

Jecht let out a snore and turned on his side. " 'S too early, Auron. Go 'way."

One eyebrow ticked in annoyance. "Jecht. Do I sound like a man to you?"

Jecht grumbled, pushing his face into the mossy earth. "Sounds 'nuf like Auron t'me."

Rikku's shortened temper snapped. "Clean Slate!" she shouted, flinging a hand towards Jecht. She followed the defiant gesture immediately with another, flinging the remaining contents of her water flask into Jecht's face. "Now stand up and start acting like a man instead of a diseased primate, you moron!"

Jecht managed to collect his scattered senses in record time, the alcoholic stupor burning out of his body from her spell. He spat and threw his now-soaked bangs out of his face, glaring at her. "The hell did you do that for, Blondieeh?" He trailed off, eyes widening as he looked her over from head to foot. Then he rubbed his eyes and looked again. "Uh, did I get thrown into the future with Auron and Rikkma's kid or somethin'?"

"No, you didn't." Rikku folded her arms and settled on a harsh glare. "If you have something to say, think very, very carefully about it first. Or better yet, keep your mouth shut anyway." She tapped the hilt of her sword for emphasis.

Jecht considered her words for a moment and then shrugged, clambering to his feet and avoiding the reach of her weapon. "Whatever. S'not my business who you stalk."

Rikku's mouth tightened into a thin line. Why in Spira had she ever thought Jecht was amusing? Well, he was funny, but not in the ha-ha way. More like funny in the off with your head, weirdo way. She eyed her sword, fingers twitching.

"So why'd you wake me up? Where the hell are we? And where's Braska?" Jecht squinted, taking in the unfamiliar forest surrounding them with a surprising measure of aplomb. Rikku opened her mouth to reply, but Jecht waved, cutting her off. "Naw, don't tell me. I bet he's with Auron doin' that Guardian duty thing, right? You wouldn't be in that getup if the Stiff was around."

Rikku sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "I woke you because we need to catch up with them." You idiot, she appended. "Being unconscious tends to be a detriment to efficient traveling." She fidgeted, restless. "Besides, we need to find Lord Braska. He's in the middle of an argument with Auron right now – no thanks to you, by the way – and I'd prefer if we were there to protect him in case something happens."

Jecht only shook his head, staring at her. "Damn, ya even cloned the stick up his ass! Don't use that costume too often, alright? It's bad enough with just one of him."

Rikku closed her eyes and began to count down from ten.

"But at least you make the coat look hot. Nice wraps! I mean the ones up there," Jecht added, motioning at her chest. "Those things on yer feet just look kinda retarded. Not that anyone's lookin' down, eh?"

Rikku gave up counting and grabbed her sword. Patience was overrated anyway. So was Blitzball, when push came to shove. "Zantetsu!" she yelled.

Jecht picked at his ear and then inspected his finger. "Never heard Auron say that before," he noted. "Nice and dramatic, though. Right up his alley. Uh, how long are you gonna point that thing at me?"

Somewhere overhead, a fiend cawed.

"Shoot," Rikku muttered, lowering her sword in defeat. "Fine. Let's move," she grunted, shoving her way past Jecht and stomping down the path, eyes fixed on the ground.

"Well, I would, but – "

Rikku spun around, the last bits of her temper fraying. "You're impossible!"

Jecht jogged to catch up with her, pulling his own sword off of his back. "Yeah, but – "

"Oh, so you want to fight me now? Please! You wouldn't stand a chance against this costume! You wouldn't stand a chance even without this costume!"

" 'ey! Take it easy, Blondie! I was just tryin' to tell ya that – "

Frustrated, she whipped her own sword around and pointed it at Jecht. "Will you just for once in your life do something intelligent and shut up?"

Something roared in agreement behind her, and Rikku blanched.

"... yeah, see, there's this big green thing with just about a million tentacles and a skirt standin' in the middle of the road, is all," Jecht finished, dropping into a battle crouch.

"Sweet Yevon, why me?" Rikku groaned to herself as she turned around to face the Ochu.

"Say, is that thing dancing?" Jecht tilted his head as the beast undulated back and forth. "... actually, it ain't half bad." He even began to sway in time with the Ochu, mimicking its motions. "That plant's got some sweet moves! Say, I know a few clubs in Zanarkand that could really use talent like that..."

This seemed to appease the Ochu, which stopped dancing and preened itself with its tentacles. For some reason, the sight was just too surreal. Here she was, a Guardian, trying her best to save Jecht, another Guardian, from Yevon-knew-what in the forest so they could get back to their job, which was to protect Braska. And what was her hapless companion doing? He was flirting with a plant!

"Stop dancing and kill it!" Rikku roared, hefting her sword over her head. She hadn't yet decided which of the two she was going to rush, but her outburst upset whatever atmosphere Jecht had been cultivating with the Ochu through his moonwalk. The Ochu let out another loud-mouthed roar and belched a cloud of yellow pollen from its impressive mouth.

Rikku would have seen red, were it not for the pollen descending over her. Instead, all she saw was stars. It felt like she was wading through molasses, and in the misty haze that refused to clear, she couldn't tell where the Ochu – or Jecht for that matter – was. Something slapped Rikku on her butt, and she whirled around and slammed her sword down on it.

I hope that was Jecht, she thought as she heard an answering roar of pain. Then, ignoring the two blurry figures moving around her – it looked like they were both dancing again – Rikku concentrated on focusing her willpower on herself. "Clean Slate," she mumbled, waving a hand in front of her own face. The yellow fog lifted, and Rikku's senses cleared. She blinked, and watched Jecht rush past her. Then she blinked again as she was bathed in yellow once more – this time in sap, rather than pollen. A few tentacles flopped to the ground next to her, and Rikku looked up in time to see Jecht hacking away at the Ochu with his sword. His style lacked any sort of finesse whatsoever, but he made up for it with determination and speed. She noted with some disappointment that Jecht still seemed to have both of his hands before hefting her sword and rushing in to help him.

A few short but messy chops later, the former Ochu lay in pieces on the floor, and Rikku was kneeling by her sword, panting. Jecht was flat on his back, nearly plastered to the ground by the yellow goop that the Ochu had spewed all over them.

Paine always was better at this dressphere than me, Rikku thought as she surveyed the damage they had caused. Sighing, she deactivated the grid; mixing the remnants of Auron and a real, live Jecht was destined to have disasterrific results. Some of her annoyance faded alongside the Samurai costume, as well as the pressing need to jump up and set off at a run down the path until they found Braska.

"This is so gross," Rikku commented as she shucked an armful of goop off of her head. "Why can't Ochu guts just pyrefly away like normal fiends do?" The answer was simple; wild Ochus weren't really fiends, they were just native and unusually sentient plants. Life really was unfair sometimes.

Frowning and parting her bangs, Rikku looked around to find Jecht. He hadn't moved from his spot on the ground, still staring into the forest's canopy with wide eyes. "Jecht? Hey, are you okay?"

"I took it down," he muttered. Then he sat up, his eyes gleaming and his fists clenched. "I took it down! By myself! Without Auron! Well, okay, with you dressed as him, but that don't count! Did ya see that?" With a whoop, Jecht somersaulted off of the ground and began dancing around the Ochu's remains, even going so far as to pick up a severed tentacle and swing it around his head like a lasso. "Yeah, baby! I'm the best!"

Rikku shook her head, trying to stifle a giggle. He looked ridiculous, covered with Ochu juice and dancing around like a madman, the Ochu's tentacle wrapped around his head like a macabre bandana. It was a little bit weird, a little bit cute, and a little bit stupid... kinda like Tidus when she thought about it. Her sniggers died out, and Rikku watched Jecht performing his victory dance with a wistful smile. I really wish Tidus could've known his dad like this. Then she shook her head. Well, I'll just have to tell him when I get back, then!

"Jecht!" she yelled, causing him to stop mid-spin and slip on a patch of slime, which he landed on with a wet splat. "Ooh, that looked like it hurt."

"It's just the sweet pain of victory," Jecht answered, still happy.

"Well, get over your sweet pain, buster," Rikku replied. "We've still gotta catch up with Braska and Auron. Last one there's a Yevonite!"

"Hah! You'll be eatin' those words, Blondie!" Jecht yelled, springing to his feet. He stopped as Rikku whirled, nearly knocking her over.

"Oh, and Jecht? Could you... umm... y'know, not tell Auron about that... little... uh... thing..."

Smirking, Jecht picked up the end of his Ochu tentacle and smacked her forehead with it. "Are ya kiddin'? That stuff is quality blackmail material. I'm gonna save it for somethin' important!" His mischievous grin was infectious, and Rikku found herself smiling back with real gratitude despite the threat.

"Thanks, Jecht. You're a good guy, under all that... stuff," she added, wrinkling her nose. "Oh, and see you!" With a cheeky wave, Rikku spun around and took off down the path at a run, laughing.

"Cheater!" Jecht yelled after her. He didn't follow, however, as she disappeared around a bend in the road. Instead, he looked back at the mangled remains of the Ochu. "By myself, huh," he repeated with a note of pride, fingering his sword. "Maybe I can do this after all."

Then he picked up the dripping end of the tentacle, still wrapped around his forehead, and inhaled. A deep grin crossed his face, for he'd figured out something that not even Rikkma knew.

Ochu juice was fermented.

Footnotes

Abilities used:
Clean Slate [Samurai] = "Restore HP and cure user of status ailments."
Zantetsu [Samurai] = "Instantly defeat one enemy. Sometimes fails."

Enkida · Jul 23, 2019

24: The Shoopuf Incident

Rikku jogged to a stop, leaning over and panting when the riverbank came into sight. "I'm getting out of shape," she huffed, looking around. There wasn't any real need to push herself, but Jecht was pretty fast and she did have her pride. Forehead itching, Rikku mopped the sweat from her brow. She pulled her fingers away and inspected the telltale traces of yellow on her palm, wincing. The not-so-flawless defeat of the Ochu was combining with the humidity and heat, forming a sweaty paste of sap that made her skin her skin itch in unpleasant ways.

Falling to her knees, she dipped her hands into the cool, refreshing water and rinsed off her sticky arms and face. When she felt somewhat human again, she patted her cheeks and sat back with a contented sigh.

The sun was perched at its zenith in the sky, and only a few pyreflies danced over the calm waters of the Moonflow. Even so, the sight was still magical. Moonlilies swayed in the breeze as pyreflies threaded their way between the plants, making it seem as though the river itself was alive, gently exhaling light and color with each breath. It was even more spectacular at nightfall, when the pyreflies would gather among the lilies en masse and light up the river like a ribbon of moonlight, fallen from the sky. She suspected Auron wouldn't let them linger for twilight; still, for the moment, Rikku allowed herself to drink in the sight.

Ever since Yuna had defeated Sin, more people were exploring the world. Fiends were still a traveling hazard, but with the Machine Faction's machina patrols and the ever-vigilant efforts of New Yevon and the Youth League, the roads had become much more densely packed. In a way, it was the same problem that affected all of Spira after Sin's defeat: every natural resort – every last bastion of idyllic beauty – was being settled and commercialized. It already happened in Guadosalam and also Zanarkand; even the Moonflow of the future was suffering under the effects of the population's rapid expansion.

Reaching out, Rikku plucked one of the plentiful moonlilies from the water and held the blossom in her hand. A pyrefly drifted around the plant, shifting and blending into the iridescent color of the flower's reflective petals.

Mixed feelings about the development mingled in her breast. On the one hand, seeing people civilize areas formerly too dangerous to settle made her Al Bhed senses tingle with pride. Much of the expansion wouldn't have been able to happen at all, if not for the willingness of her people to help and share their machina with the rest of the world. Rikku had been right there beside them, using her skills to teach others how to use technology.

On the other hand, Yuna's stricken expression as she had seen what Cid had made of her beloved Zanarkand was burned into Rikku's memory, just as were the melting forests of Macalania. She took a deep breath and stared out over the river once more, trying to absorb its beauty. It was saddening, to think of how the sight would almost completely disappear in just a few short years. In her time the flowers had nearly died out, trampled underfoot by the constant traffic of machina transportation devices. She carefully placed the moonlily back into the water and watched it drift away.

Rikku flopped backwards onto the sandy bank, staring into the bright afternoon sky. Her mind drifted towards her past and Spira's future. This was the same spot she'd washed up on after Tidus and Wakka had thwarted her attempt to kidnap Yuna. She had to admit, lazing away the afternoon on the bank of the Moonflow was a lot more enjoyable when her face wasn't planted into the sand.

You're not dead?

A smile crossed over Rikku's face and her eyes closed, imagining Tidus was right there, leaning over her with that goofy grin on his face.

Rikku! You're Rikku! Hey, you're okay!

It almost felt like someone else's memories to her now. Rikku drew an arm over her face. I'm not crying, she told herself. Still, the memory of Tidus' infectious smile was nearly as bright as the midday sunlight. It was one of her most precious memories; her fateful meeting with not only Tidus, but also Yuna and the rest of her Guardians. She remembered how clueless Wakka had been despite Tidus' near-slip; the disapproving press of Lulu's dark lips as she scolded Rikku for putting Yuna in danger; how amused Auron had sounded when he'd instructed her to actually open her eyes when looking at him –

With a start Rikku sat up, eyes wide. Amused? She frowned, replaying the memory over again in her head. His back had been turned as Yuna approached; Rikku hadn't even noticed him then, too caught up in her awe of Lulu's professional poise and beauty.

She'd only realized that she was standing beside the Legendary Guardian himself when he turned to face them. And when she had seen his shielded, grim face masked by those dark sunglasses, the first thing she'd felt was an overwhelming jolt of fear. He had stepped in front of her, and Rikku thought he might have heard her knees knocking together. When he demanded that she look at him, she'd nearly wet her shorts; then, he'd forced her to open her eyes – well, one, at least – and she had been certain the game was up.

She wasn't the only one to be left flabbergasted by Auron's easy acceptance afterwards; Tidus had even complained that she hadn't had to face a trial by Kimahri's lance. Rikku had responded by pointing out all the bruises Tidus and Wakka had given her while destroying her submarine.

It wasn't until later, when she was smarting from both Macalania's stinging cold and Wakka's harsh rejection of their friendship that Rikku had begun to see the gruff man as Auron rather than the Legendary Guardian. It had happened somehow between the moments that her face was buried into Auron's coat, trying to keep her tears from freezing to her cheeks and his easy dismissal of the suspicious temple guard. That was, she had thought, the first time he had been kind to her. But as she reviewed her memories, the seed of doubt was planted. How much of it was colored by the capricious whims of a fifteen-year-old lovesick girl? She'd even had a crush on Tidus, of all people, back at the beginning – at least before the blond had opened his mouth and ruined it for her. Now, though, she wondered.

She thought back on the initial reaction she'd received from Yuna's Guardians when they first met. With Yuna's reassurance, Lulu had accepted her after their private discussion. Wakka was too thick to understand and too good-hearted to question her sudden desire to join the group. Tidus was already in her corner and she'd known Kimahri would remain silent, as Ronso tradition demanded. That had left only Auron to convince. He was anything but stupid; his single vigilant eye seemed to catch everything. Why had he, the most paranoid of all Yuna's Guardians, allowed her to join the Pilgrimage? He must have known she was the one piloting the submarine that kidnapped Yuna, and yet he acted as though she wasn't a threat. Facing away from the others, he had barely even noticed she was there. Or maybe, Rikku thought, his back had been turned because he didn't want to see her.

"Show me your face." She'd thought he was angry; with the filter of memory and experience, though, she understood that his gruff voice had actually been gentle. Had he been trying to reassure her because of her obvious fear? "Look at me." No, he'd been stern then, annoyed with her evasiveness. And then…

"Open your eyes."

Rikku covered her mouth, and felt a shocked smile stretching over her face. He'd been laughing at her. A silent, grumpy unsent Guardian laugh, but a laugh all the same.

"Are you certain?"

Rikku's grin faded. She'd heard that in the Farplane, too. Auron's voice, asking her if she was sure of her wish. Maybe, Rikku thought with a shiver, he hadn't been asking for her sake. Maybe he'd known what was to come. Hadn't Bahamut told her that she wasn't important?

Does that mean my friends... Auron... they're going to die no matter what I do? What will happen to me? Will I die here with them, too? Rikku drew her knees into her chest and buried her face in her arms, the afternoon sun no longer warming her shoulders. The song of the pyreflies grew louder in her ears, her heart thundering in her chest. She couldn't be sure if her sudden panic was for her friends or for herself. So worried about the course of history and the flow of time, Rikku had never once considered she might be a part of it – but every story had to end, didn't it? This cold, paralyzing feeling flooding her body – this was real fear, not the knee-knocking bumbling of her fifteen-year-old self.

She thought of Tidus, boldly leaping off the edge of the airship. How did he do it? How could he keep smiling and acting normal even when he knew what was coming? How did Yuna do it during her Pilgrimage? Or even Braska?

What was Bahamut was trying to accomplish? The Fayth never did anything without a reason. Was it to change the world? Bahamut had all but said she couldn't affect the future. But, Rikku realized, even if the world hadn't changed, she had. The past was the past. And if the future, too, was set in stone, then maybe – just maybe – that was the reason she was here. To learn how to live in the present.

"Are you certain?" Auron had asked her. Rikku took a deep breath and lifted her head, holding onto her idea and using it to beat down her rising fear. If there was one thing she was sure of, it was that she wouldn't go down without a fight. This was her life, and it was her story. It didn't matter where or how it ended; she'd make sure the journey was worth it.

"One hundred percent," she breathed, letting her memories fade.

.x.x.x.

Rikku found Braska and Auron loitering at the edge of the way station away from their fellow travelers, conversing. From the looks on their faces, it seemed their disagreement still hadn't been resolved. She wiped her hands off on her skirt and approached them with a cheery smile.

"Hey guys! What's up?"

"Where's Jecht?" Auron asked, not sounding surprised to see her alone. "Wandering off to find his next watering hole?" He crossed his arms.

"I wish you would have a little more faith in Jecht," Braska interrupted, frowning. "I am sure he was delayed for a good reason." He looked at her with a hint of hope.

Rikku clasped her hands behind her back and swayed on the balls of her feet. She'd been looking forward to meeting up with the others again, but now felt as though she were a tiny bug under a giant magnifying glass, and both men were pulling her legs in opposite directions. "Uhh, see, about that..."

"Don't worry. I would've left him behind, too," Auron supplied.

"Are you sure he will be fine on his own?" Braska asked, a crease forming between his eyebrows. "Perhaps we should backtrack and try to find him."

Though they were addressing her, it seemed more like Braska and Auron were continuing to fire verbal volleys at one another. "Actually," she began.

Auron cut her off and glared at Braska. "I'm not wasting my time by looking for him, and neither is Rikkma."

Braska's frown deepened. "Unless I am mistaken, Rikkma chose not to leave us in Guadosalam. All of us, including Jecht. She would never abandon a companion so heartlessly."

Grimacing, Rikku gestured at the men's argument, muttering under her breath. A moment later, a large splash of water rained down over both Auron and Braska. A few of the other passengers glanced their way and murmured, and even more of them got up and left for the central station. Auron stood stock-still, while Braska delicately plucked the now-drooping tassel attached to his circlet off of his face. Rikku swallowed and reconsidered her bright idea when both men turned to face her. For a moment the only sound punctuating their incredulous stares was the slow drip of water from their soaked clothing. "Ah, ha hah..." Rikku rubbed the back of her head. "So you see, there was this Ochu, and..."

" 'EY!" a loud voice yelled, and Rikku spun around, half-expecting to see a jubilant blond burst out of the forest. It wasn't Tidus who appeared by the riverbank this time, though, but Jecht. He was jogging towards them, his progress slowed by a thick bundle of rope that was coiled around one shoulder. "Braska! Auron! You guys ain't gonna believe this!"

Rikku's eyes almost popped out of her head as she began waving her hands at Jecht to catch his attention. You promised not to tell! she mouthed, dancing in place as he neared them. Her hope of being subtle plummeted as he ignored her with a familiar glazed look in his eyes. I thought I cured him already! Where'd he find more to drink?

"Rikkma? There are bathrooms available at the central crossing station if you need them," Braska interrupted, and Rikku caught herself mid-hop and dropped her arms, squeaking in surprise. Looking uncomfortable, Braska cleared his throat. "Of course, if it's really that urgent, we could escort you to the side of the road – "

"I'm fine," Rikku chirped out, her face burning red. She watched Auron looking away from the corner of his eye, his expression unusually solemn. With a jolt, she realized he was trying not to laugh at her. Again. "Really," she mumbled, feeling her mortification quadruplify. Blackmail or not, Jecht was going to pay.

The man in question was already boasting, tapping his chest with a thumb as he weaved before them. "So Blondie ran into this big plant thing an' pissed it off, but then I saved her all by myself."

"Saved?" Rikku clenched her teeth. "Wait a second! I'm not the one who was dancing with it!"

Jecht barreled on, gesticulating with his arms to illustrate his story. "Yeah! It was pretty good, but I was better!" His face darkened and he whirled on Rikku, losing his balance in the process. When he straightened, he pushed an accusatory finger into her face. "The party was just gettin' started, but then you had to go all gung-ho on it with yer swo – " He stopped when Rikku shot him a murderous look that managed to briefly pierce through his inebriated fog. "S-sw-swearin'," he finished clumsily.

Rikku let out a silent sigh of relief. Then Jecht ran with it.

"Yeah, swearin', that's it! Worse than me, too! I mean, shit!" The few remaining passengers began to glance in their direction again. "And not just any shit," he continued in what Rikku imagined was the loudest voice possible to achieve without a microphone. "Choco-shit! No wait. Choco-humpin' mog-snoggin' shit. No, no wait! Choco-humpin' mog-snoggin' shit and... and... your momma!" He gave Rikku a big thumbs-up. "Nice one, Blondie!"

"You didn't really say that?" Braska asked her in a low tone, glancing around.

"No!" Rikku yelped. Then she looked at Jecht. "Well, okay, so maybe I did say some nasty things, but, it wasn't that bad!"

"You do realize, it was just an Ochu..." Braska murmured.

Rikku gave up trying to shush Jecht and hung her head in defeat as the few travelers who had remained for the entire serenade of obscenities stared at them. "Yeah, so anyway, one of you can just kill me right now and put me out of my misery."

Jecht hadn't noticed the attention he was garnering; he only seemed capable of focusing on things in his immediate line of sight. Fortunately he moved on from Rikku and now had Auron on his radar.

"Uh, say. Why are ya wet? Aww, man, did I miss out on a pickup Blitzin' game?" Squinting, Jecht finally seemed to realize there was a river next to them. "Whoa! Lookit all that water! 'ey... it's leakin' those shiny things. Whatchamacallits. Y'know, dead people." He waved a stray pyrefly away, nearly smacking his own face in the process. "Trippy..."

Rikku slapped her forehead. "Maybe I will take a bathroom break, after all."

"... so you two were delayed because Jecht was dancing with an Ochu?" Auron said, wringing water out of the sleeve of his coat. "I rest my case."

"I beat it fair and square," Jecht piped up. "And look!" Bending over, he shrugged the mass of rope off of his shoulder into a pile at Rikku's feet. "This time I brought back the loot!"

Rikku leaned in to have a look at the "rope." Then she jumped back with a disgusted yell. "Eww! Grossness! Those are Ochu tentacles! I can't believe you brought them with you!"

Jecht looked crestfallen at her outburst. "Huh? Y'mean you can't use 'em?"

"I steal stuff on the inside of fiends, I don't rip off their body parts!" Rikku took another large step away from the pile.

"Aww, c'mon! But I even dried 'em out an' everything," Jecht answered, his expression turning surly.

Braska, who had finished squeezing excess water from the bulk of his outer robes, nudged the pile with his staff. "Now now. I'm sure Jecht meant well, Rikkma. And I think we all must admit that defeating an Ochu on one's own is an impressive feat."

"Yeah, ain't it?" Jecht preened with a self-satisfied smirk.

"I wonder, though... what do you mean, you dried them out?" Braska was kneeling now, his face troubled as he poked through the tentacles with his staff. Jecht licked his lips.

"Humph," Auron said. "I told you so. Lord Braska?"

Braska let out a slight sigh and shook his head. "There is no use debating over it now. Let us move on, the shoopuf station is right around the bend. Jecht, come with me. I will walk you there." With a look of resignation, Braska grabbed Jecht's arm and led him down the path towards the landing point. "So... did you know that pyreflies gather to the Moonflow at twilight? The entire river turns into a sea of light."

"A river full o' dead people. I swear, this place is gonna turn me into a than... thana... thanatana... aww, hell with it. Zombie hater!" Jecht continued to spout his potation-inspired wisdom as Braska made several futile attempts to hush the large man.

Rikku watched them wander away, scratching her head. "Huh? What'd Braska mean, debating about what?" She raked a few more fingers through her braids with an expression of disgust; the Ochu sap still trapped in her hair was clumping and it probably looked as bad as it smelled. As far as she was concerned, a bath couldn't come soon enough.

"You really don't know?" Auron stepped over the pile of abandoned tentacles and paused at her side. He grasped her hand and pulled it from her hair, then held it before her face.

Rikku stared at the yellow goop running down her fingers in confusion. Then she looked over her shoulder at Jecht, who chose that moment to burp before staggering into Braska. "Wait, you mean..." Returning her gaze to her fingers, her eyes widened. "Oh, that is just too gross, even for Jecht."

"Ochu sap is known to be a potent inebriant," Auron explained. Then he sniffed and twisted his face into a mild grimace. "Next time, cast the Water spell over yourself."

"Oh, umm..." Rikku blushed; Auron was still holding her hand. "Yeah, sorry about that. But it really looked like you two were going to go at it right there, you know?" She let out a brief sigh of disappointment when he released her hand, striding down the road. "Hey!" She jogged to catch up with him, slowing by his side. Auron wasn't looking at her, so she frowned and tugged at the loose sleeve of his coat. "Is everything alright? 'Cause, this tension is really uncool. All these negative vibes are gonna bring us bad luck!"

"Then use Jecht's costume," Auron replied.

Rikku refused to give up with a stubborn pout. "Come on! What are you and Braska really fighting about?"

Auron exhaled. "Primarily about Jecht. I'd hoped traveling together would teach him some responsibility, but with his dependence on spirits he's only getting worse. Braska still sees hope for Jecht's future and wants to guide him. I, on the other hand, am starting to believe he is nothing more than a liability."

Rikku frowned; she couldn't exactly express her own opinion when she found herself agreeing with Braska. The whole point of talking was to try to get Auron to calm down, though, not to get him mad at her, too. Speaking of which… "But it can't be just that," Rikku guessed. "It's also about me, isn't it?"

Auron's expression tightened into a pained smile, and at that moment Bahamut's chastising words about her own audacity returned full force. Self-esteem? Who needed that? "Or maybe not," she added, feeling her face heat.

Auron sensed her discomfort and cleared his throat. "In a manner of speaking. Perhaps not in the way you imagine. It's more of a disagreement over our definitions of duty... and how you should fit into that definition."

So then he's still holding back? Rikku decided she'd cheer doubly hard for Braska... on the sly, of course. "Ooh, you mean he hit a sore point." She frowned. "Well... even if you don't agree with him, maybe you could... I dunno... compromise?" And actually start dating me for real? She gave him a mental kick to the butt.

"It's not that simple – " Auron began. He broke off as a loud yell rang through the air.

"Was that Jecht?" Rikku asked, before a myriad of screams and the sound of groaning metal rose above her voice. The chaos was coming from the landing point, and seconds later, Rikku gaped as panicked travelers streamed out from around the bend, running in every direction. "Hey! Hey wait! Is Sin attacking?" she yelled, catching the arm of a passer-by.

"No, it's some maniac with a sword!" The man shook himself out of her grasp and scrambled away.

"Braska... Let's go!" Auron said to her. He drew his sword in one fluid motion – causing yet another wave of screaming and panic – and began shoving people out of his way.

"Maniac with a sword?" she mumbled, ducking behind Auron and drawing her daggers. "Holy moley, please don't tell me..."

The fleeing passengers thinned out, and Rikku slammed into Auron's back as he turned the corner and pulled up short. "I'm going to kill him," she heard him say, and peeked out from behind his arm. Then she choked.

"Jecht, you have to stop!" Braska was trying to calm the other man down, with little success.

Jecht, for his part, was brandishing his sword, crouched before a very surprised and angry shoopuf. A very surprised, angry and bleeding shoopuf.

"He hit the shoopuf?" Shoopufs were supposed to be huge, gentle and friendly creatures. The furious animal before them only seemed to be ginormous to her, though. It roared in pain and lashed out with its trunk, tearing away yet more metal from the already-damaged machina docking bay, forcing everyone to duck the flying shrapnel. The gigantic pole it was lashed to strained dangerously under the weight of the panicked creature. While the travelers had managed to escape unscathed, more than a few pieces of luggage had already been flattened under the shoopuf's feet. A lone Hypello was ducking and weaving between the debris, waving his arms over his head in agitation.

"Shtooop! Shtooop!" it cried, running towards Jecht.

"Get back! I killed an Ochu single-handedly, ya know!" Jecht yelled, ducking into his battle crouch.

Braska was already whirling his staff around. "Slowaga!" he chanted, sending the offensive spell flying at Jecht without hesitation. The other man stood frozen for a moment as the magic hit him. It was enough for the surprised Hypello to scramble out of the way of Jecht's sword.

"Are yoo inshane!" he squawked at Jecht, falling over.

"Ain't you a fiend?" Jecht fired back, hefting his sword again. Before he could attack, Auron was already in motion, knocking the weapon out of Jecht's grip with his own sword, his face a mask of fury.

"Unbelievable! Shut up and stop attacking things!" Auron roared, turning to face the rampaging shoopuf. "Rikkma! Get over here! Braska, keep Jecht down and protect the civilian!" His voice was nearly drowned out as the shoopuf heaved and finally managed to snap its tethering post with a loud crack.

It stood before them for a few moments, panting noisily, the whites of its eyes showing clearly. Thick red blood from the heavy gash Jecht had inflicted was spilling onto the ground with each breath of the huge creature.

"We should help it!" Rikku said.

"Out of the question," Auron replied sharply. "If it charges, we won't be able to stop it from trampling other people. We need to kill it."

"Now, that's what I'm talkin' abo – " Jecht fell over with a pained grunt as Braska simply cracked his staff over the head of the other man. "Oww," he mumbled from his sprawled position, face-down on the ground.

"Rikkma's correct. We were the cause of this problem, so we can't simply solve it with bloodshed." Without waiting, Braska sent a powerful curative spell towards the shoopuf.

"It worked!" Rikku cheered as she saw the animal's wound clot and scab over. Once again she marveled at the raw power behind the force of his spell; a shoopuf was several times the size of a normal human being, and yet Braska's magic worked as effectively as ever – his magical capacity could have easily rivaled Lulu's. She pulled her attention away from the summoner as she heard Auron curse.

"It didn't work. We've only made it easier for the creature to move."

Even without its injury, the shoopuf was still pawing the ground, eyes rolled as it prepared to charge them. "Wait!" she yelled. "I don't want the blood of an innocent shoopuf on my conscience!"

"You may not have a choice," Auron said, even as Braska cast another Slowaga, this time at the enraged creature.

Think, Rikku! Think! How can we take it down without killing it?

As if in answer, Rikku's sphere grid lit up, its magic coming to life and swirling around her. "What? What's going on?"

Let me help you, a familiar voice whispered in her ears. Use me.

Rikku blinked as her vision cleared, staring up at the angry shoopuf even as her hand automatically lifted to catch the rays of light forming above her head.

"Believe," she heard herself saying. And then the presence faded, and Rikku was left standing in the midst of three bemused men, one panicking Hypello, and one very angry shoopuf with nothing more than a microphone in her hand.

Oh, well. She'd played before tougher audiences than this.

"Listen up! It's showtime!" she shouted, pulling the microphone down and striking a dramatic pose.

"Rikkma?" Braska said, eyeing her newfound excess of feathers and ruffles as she turned her back to the shoopuf and flounced.

Jecht peeled his face off of the ground. "Wow! Is that a skirt or just a really big belt?"

"Trust me!" Rikku crooned, sending both of them a playful wink. Then she focused her attention completely on the shoopuf. Even with the glow of Lenne's spirit surrounding her, she retained enough presence of mind to realize the immediate danger. The Songstress sphere was a perfect manipulator, but the costume had no attacks and nearly no defenses. If she couldn't charm the beast quickly, she might as well have rolled under its feet with a target painted on her stomach.

"Sleep, baby, sleep..." Rikku murmured, swaying as she pointed a gloved finger at the shoopuf. It bellowed in response, and Rikku felt the sweat beading on her forehead. A really tough crowd, huh? She sucked in her breath and gripped her microphone.

"C'mon, don't try to brawl..." she cooed. "Listen to the moonlilies' call!" The shoopuf stopped roaring and whiffed, and Rikku twirled. The song she was belting out was just a distraction; what really counted were the movements of her feet. Still, if she couldn't capture the shoopuf's attention, it would be able to resist her spell.

"And down the pleasant dreams will fall..." She shimmied to the side, then skipped, and... there! Rikku felt the magic taking hold, her steps synchronizing to the pattern of light on the ground as she hummed. She smiled as her body moved on its own, the dance itself becoming a channeling rod for the energy she was pouring out through her song. Come on, big boy, she thought as she ran a hand down her side. Pay attention to me!

As if in response, the shoopuf began to sway, its pants slowing down as it watched Rikku's dance show.

Yes! It's working! Unfortunately, the magic worked a little too well. It caught the attention of more than just her target.

"Whoa, that's pretty good, Blondie!" Jecht cheered, sitting up and rubbing his head. He whooped and clapped his hands, and the shoopuf snapped out of its trance. It let out an earth-shaking roar, and Rikku stumbled.

"Sleep, baby, sleep..." Rikku's voice tapered off, the spell she was weaving broken. Damn you to Yevon, Jecht! You deserve each other!

The shoopuf rose onto its hind feet, and Rikku panicked. Getting smooshed was not in the plan!

"Rikkma! Get back!" she heard Auron shouting. Silly Auron, getting so worried like that. People might get the idea he liked me. Braska, too – he was hitting Jecht with his staff again, this time knocking the drunken man unconscious. It was kind of funny, because everybody knew white mages hit like Shelinda, so why even bother? Still, it was strange, though... they all sounded so distant. Everything was fuzzy, probably because that white light was surrounding her again. But she hadn't activated her sphere grid, had she? She wasn't done yet. Rikku wanted to yawn, but found herself growing worried as she realized that she couldn't blink.

Lenne? Lenne! Let me go!

Rising panic burned away the cotton surrounding her mind. It wasn't as frightening as when Bahamut had trapped her; she knew Lenne was only trying to help. Still, the sensation of being a prisoner in her own body shook her to her very core. Someone else was moving her arms and legs, and as she raised the microphone to her lips, Rikku realized that she wasn't seeing her own hands. She opened her mouth, and the voice that spilled out was Lenne's, rich and soulful. Even the very breath she took to power her words seemed laden with magic.

"Be still, be calm, my precious boy..." The shoopuf dropped to all fours. "Don't struggle, my love, just enjoy." Lenne threw her arms wide, and the beast's legs folded. "It's much too late to get away..." Lenne lowered her hands, and with a low keen, the shoopuf's eyes closed. Smiling, Lenne threw her head back and spun, long brown hair flying around her. "Fall into your dreams where we will play!"

The light was flaring, and Rikku felt her control over the Songstress sphere – and her own appearance – returning. Even so, she couldn't stop herself from shaking as the echo of Lenne's parting laughter rang in her ears. She dropped the microphone as though it burned her hand and reached for her belt, deactivating the sphere. Then she slid to her knees, numb.

"Shank yoo, shank yoo! Yoo shaved my shoopuf!" The Hypello scrambled to care for his sleeping mount. Rikku could only watch and stare as Auron knelt by her side.

"What happened?" he asked quietly. "It wasn't just your clothes this time. Your face... your hair... it's as though you became a different person."

Rikku worked her jaw for a few moments. "I-I lost control," she whimpered. "That wasn't me, it really wasn't me!" She gripped her belt. Wasn't Lenne gone, dead, living her happily ever afterlife with Shuyin in the Farplane? Every fantasy Rikku had had, every scrap of jealousy she had ever felt for Yuna's charmed ability with the sphere grid was fading into horror. There was nothing magical or special about being possessed; it was terrifying.

"That was very brave of you, to face an angry shoopuf alone." Rikku felt an arm on her back, and looked up to see Braska regarding her.

Is that what the Summoner's Rapture is really like? She shuddered.

"And reckless," Auron murmured, but Rikku couldn't really disagree with him on that point.

"I felt it," Braska told her. "An ancient presence. It was almost... like a Summoning, in many ways. But different, somehow. The pyreflies which gathered around you transformed your appearance."

Rikku bit her lip. "But I didn't call them. She did."

"Who was that?" Auron's voice was serious, and... worried?

He was worried about her? Progress! Despite herself, a small smile crept across Rikku's face.

"That was Lenne, a thousand-year-old memory," Rikku explained, fingering her grid. "She's done this before. I mean, not to me. But it's always been for a good cause."

"There's an actual soul trapped in your sphere?" Braska said, kneeling back in surprise. "An aeon that can summon itself?"

Rikku blanched. Well, when he put it that way, Lenne did sound a lot creepier than she was. "Ahh... no no no, she's not a Fayth. It's kinda more like... she's an Unsent, maybe? Except it's not really her, it's just her memories. She doesn't have a body of her own."

Braska continued to frown. "Memories? I doubt that memories alone can wield that kind of influence even with that magical belt of yours." His frown deepened. "Such power could be dangerous. It might be in your best interest to inform the Church about your – "

"No way!" Rikku shot up, bubbling with indignant anger. "There's absolutely no way I'd ever trust Yevon with any of my stuff! They'd probably want to shoot me just for having it. They did shoot me, actually! So you can forget about it!"

"Calm down," Auron told her, rising to his feet and offering her a supportive arm. "Lord Braska meant well. He was only thinking of your safety when he suggested it."

Rikku took a deep breath and tried to push aside her sudden spout of anger. "Yeah, yeah, I know." She caught sight of Braska's stricken look and hid her smile. "It's fine, you can stop looking like you kicked me. I just lost my temper, that's all."

"I am sorry," Braska replied as he bent over Jecht. "It slipped my mind for the moment – how strongly you feel about the Church. Not all of Yevon is as strict as the clergy in Bevelle, though." Then he frowned at Jecht, who was groaning from where he sprawled across the ground. "Hmm, I believe I may have struck Jecht a little too hard the second time."

Auron released her arm and stepped over Jecht. "Not hard enough," he grunted, the disgust leaking back into his voice. "What happened here?"

Braska paused mid-spell, containing the healing magic in one hand. "Jecht had never seen a shoopuf before. He thought it was a fiend." Releasing the magic, he let it trickle down over the Blitzer's forehead, reducing the noticeable swelling there.

Rikku blinked. "How could he think it was a fiend?" She glanced at the Hypello, who was inspecting the fresh scar on the slumbering shoopuf. "I mean, it's wearing a saddle. And it's not like he hasn't seen a Hypello before!"

"You mean he was drunk," Auron said bluntly to Braska, who didn't quite manage a smile.

"Well, yes, there was that, too..."

Rikku kicked Jecht in the shin, causing him to grunt as he rolled awake. "Huh?" Then he saw Braska and grabbed his head. " 'ey, stop hittin' me with that thing already!" He blinked when he noticed everyone staring. "Eh? What's the big deal?"

Jecht wasn't expecting Auron's punch. Rikku and Braska weren't expecting Auron's punch either and both jerked back as Jecht toppled over. It wasn't a punch between friends, and Auron shook out his hand after delivering it.

Some semblance of sobriety returned to Jecht as he sat up, holding his jaw. "The hell was that for?" he shouted.

"You attacked a shoopuf. What's worse, you tried to attack a civilian," Auron said coldly. He gestured at the Hypello, who was ambling towards them. "You put Lord Braska and many innocent people in danger, and you nearly killed Rikkma as well."

Jecht's mouth opened and closed a few times, then he held his head between his hands. "Listen, I didn't know that thing wasn't a fiend."

"Idiot," Auron muttered under his breath. "I'll deal with you later." He fell silent as the Hypello stopped before Braska, who bowed deeply.

"I must apologize for my Guardian's behavior," Braska said, his head dipped low. "I really do not know what I can say, but please believe that we never meant to cause you this trouble."

" 'ey, wait a minute, shouldn't it be me apologizin' – " Jecht let out a sharp wheeze and stopped talking as Auron sent a none-too-gentle elbow into his stomach.

Ignoring everyone else, the Hypello swayed for a few moments, blinking his wide-set eyes. He tapped his long fingers together.

"Yoo are a Shummoner?" he asked placidly. Then again, no one had ever really seen an upset Hypello before, so Rikku could only assume. Their fish-like features were so alien that it was hard for other races to interpret their usual expressions as anything other than vacant curiosity.

Braska remained immobile, his head still bowed. "Again, please forgive us."

The Hypello said nothing and Braska slowly straightened. "I would like you to accept this money as a token of our sincerity," he continued. "Auron?"

Auron shifted, reaching into his coat. "Yes, my lord, but how much – "

"All of it," Braska said immediately, and the silence that followed seemed to stretch on forever, until it was broken by the Hypello.

"Verily generous of yoo," he said, swiveling away from Braska to shuffle in front of Auron. He held one long-fingered hand out expectantly, and Auron looked down at that hand and stared. Rikku could almost see the vein beginning to pulse in his forehead. With a stiff movement, he withdrew the pouch from his cloak and let it drop into the Hypello's waiting palm.

Not even bothering to count the coins, the Hypello looked at the debris and shrugged. "Next shoopuf ride will be delaylay-laaayed. Come back this evening!"

"Well," Jecht mumbled as Braska led them away from the destruction, "It ain't all bad. At least we get to see the Moonflow at night, right?"

"Wonderful," Auron spat. "Maybe that will give us time to sober you up before your next accident."

Braska's shoulders drooped, and Jecht rubbed the back of his head, looking away with a guilty expression.

Footnotes

"Song" lyrics are original text, not a real song.

Special thanks to AuronLu for helping me figure out how to swear in Spiran.

Memento Vivere [FFX, FFX-2]

Memento Vivere

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