"Yeah, so, this is your section," Kakuzu said, tracing out an area on the map. "Most of it's pretty straightforward—nuts, ores, that kind of stuff. Don't miss this place here; they're kinda hard to see, tucked back in this ravine the way they are, but they've got some really good blooddrinker bushes and the pollen and leaves are super valuable. You should be able to get at least twenty pounds of the leaves and a couple ounces of the pollen."
"Lord Kakuzu," the village headman said, bowing dogeza. "Please, My Lord, forgive my impertinence, but I beg you to consider what you ask of me. The area you indicate is forty miles across. That may be only a matter of hours for a ninja as great as yourself, but we are civilians. The woods are thick and filled with threats. There are no roads, yet we will still need a cart to manage the quantity of goods you are requiring us to obtain. There—"
The man stopped talking and clutched at Kakuzu's arm. That arm was punched straight through the headman's chest, his heart gripped in Kakuzu's fist. The heart was non-functional, but the ancient ninja squeezed it repeatedly to make it look as though it were still beating.
Kakuzu shoved the still-dying corpse off his arm and turned away before it hit the ground. His eyes swept across the villagers, all of them in full dogeza in the dirt.
"Eeny, meeny, miney, moe," he counted. "Catch a bijū by the toe, if he hollers, let him go, I choose Y-O-U! You there! Stand up."
Faces looked up just long enough to figure out whom the ninja was pointing at. Those lucky enough not to have been chosen immediately put their foreheads back in the loamy soil while the unlucky one stood up.
He was in his twenties and his hairline was already receding. At some point, he had broken his left pinky and it had healed crooked. He was shaking so hard that it took him two tries to stand up.
"Me, sir?" he asked.
"Yep. What's your name, kid?"
"M-Minato, sir."
"Minato? Really? Like the Fourth?"
"Yes sir."
"Wow. Your mom had big ovaries. Did she push you as a kid? Act disappointed when it turned out that you weren't going to be a ninja?"
"No, sir. She was wonderful."
"Huh. She around?"
Minato licked his lips nervously. His eyes flickered very briefly to the side. "No, sir."
Kakuzu's arm shot out, extending impossibly far and only connected to his body by a skein of thread. It blasted straight through Minato's face, then retracted just as quickly, leaving Minato's body to collapse to its knees and then to the ground.
"Geez, kid," Kakuzu said. "If you're going to lie to me, at least have the decency not to look at your mom first. Anyway, guy next to him! No, not you. The one on his left. Stand up and tell me your name."
This man was older, probably thirty-ish. He had a slight belly but the arms and hands of someone who worked in the fields every day. The webbing between the index and middle finger on his right hand was calloused from years of pithing the rice plants and the skin of his palms was leathery from sliding up the stalk in order to strip off the kernels. His wrists and forearms were pitted and scarred from the claws of the plants.
"I am Kaito, sir," he said, bowing deeply and quickly.
"Nice to meetcha, Kaito. I'm Kakuzu, but you knew that. Anyway, congrats on becoming headman."
"Uh...thank you, sir?"
"No worries, no worries. Now, here's the map. You can't see it from over there. C'mere. That's better. Now, you'll be doing the tax collecting through this area. Like I was saying to that first guy, don't miss out on this town here, or this one. And don't worry, I won't be back until winter solstice, so you've got plenty of time. Lots more of you little podunk places to visit, you know?"
"Yes, sir."
Kakuzu laughed. "Man, if Leaf ever got off their asses and did a real census, I'd be out so. Much. Money. Honestly, it's like they can't be bothered to visit anyplace with less than a couple hundred people." He looped an arm around Kaito's shoulder and turned the man to face the two dozen houses that were the village. The village didn't have a name; no one had ever felt one was needed. They were self-contained and didn't need to travel much.
"How's it feel to be in charge of all you survey, Kaito?" Kakuzu asked, his voice affable.
"Um...good, sir?"
"Damn right it's good! Power. Best drug there is. So, since I'm being so generous and helpful by putting you in charge, I'm sure you're going to repay me by collecting all my taxes, right?"
What did one even say to that? Based on the two dead bodies on the ground, there was only one response.
"Of course, sir. How would you like them packaged?"
o-o-o-o
Kakuzu moseyed through the forests of Fire, absentmindedly killing the occasional mid-leap predator, while ticking off items on his checklist. His partner walked beside him, humming quietly.
"Grid square 1, 2, 3 all dealt with," Kakuzu muttered to himself as he studied his map. "Haven't checked on 4 in a couple years, should probably do that...hm. That village in square 12 might have budded. Let's see...that place in square 8 should be ready for pickup. What did I set them to...oh, right. Ten pounds of betel nut, two hundred pounds of highest-grade maple, twelve hundred pounds of rice. Note: talk to Itachi about whether the Crows need another rice shipment." He wrote the note on the move, the tip of his tongue sticking out the corner of his mouth in concentration.
"You are a very strange man, Kakie," Hidan said.
"Don't call me that," Kakuzu said, not looking up from his lists.
"What, Kakie? C'mon, it's a term of endearment. Y'know, like Pinkies." He leaned in close. "It used to be that I called Itachi 'Pink Eyes', but that sounds a lot like Pinkies, don't you think? I figured Pinkies was easier to say."
"Call me Kakie again and I'll beat you senseless. Oh, and we need to go east a bit more. There's a village I want to check on."
"Seriously, man, when you said you wanted to 'explore off the beaten track' and 'see new places', I didn't realize that you meant check in on every tiny little village in Fire."
"Oh, don't worry, I don't intend on visiting every tiny little village in Fire."
"That's a relief. I thought—"
"We'll also be hitting up Lightning and Earth."
"C'mon, man, now you're just being mean!"
Kakuzu snickered and tucked his notes away, turned left, and moved up into a jog.
"Seriously, how do you even have all this?" Hidan asked, effortlessly keeping pace even while having his heavy triple scythe slung over his shoulder. "I'd think Leaf would have already squeezed these guys dry."
"Nah," Kakuzu said. "They don't even realize that these people exist. Seriously, their census says that there's 300,000 people in Fire. That's low by, like...I dunno, a factor of four? More?"
"Huh," Hidan said. "That sounds dumb of them. Say what you will, they ain't usually dumb."
"Eh, there's no—on your right."
Hidan was already lashing out with his scythe, bisecting the leaping snake without bothering to glance over.
"There's no real need for them to track these guys," Kakuzu said, ignoring the way Hidan was busily licking the blood off his scythe while rolling his eyes in exaggerated delight. "They're far off the beaten track and they make an effort to stay hidden. If you don't already know where they are then finding them takes a lot of work. Plus, not really worth it. The amount of money that I'm collecting is huge for one ninja but not worth the effort for a nation. Too much trouble finding each of these villages and then visiting to pick up the stuff."
"Sure, but..."
"Could you please, for once in your life, just assume that I know what I'm doing?" Kakuzu asked, exasperated.
"Okay, okay, geez. Anyway. Leaf doesn't know about them, but you do. How's that?"
Kakuzu eyed him as though it was the stupidest question to ever pass human lips. "Hidan...do you have any idea how old I am? I haven't just been taxing these villages since before you were born, I've been taxing these villages since before Hashirama was born, and long before his cute little 'Hidden Villages' idea." He shook his head. "Honestly, what a pain in the ass. Things were great back when everything was just clans fighting each other. Now they've got all these armies and patrols and census takers. So annoying.
"Anyway. I sweep through here every few years, talk to the people, and ask where the missing ones went. Sometimes they're dead, sometimes they went off and founded another village somewhere else. If so, I go find them and add them to my map." He gestured with the folded piece of fabric.
"Yeah, what's up with that map, anyway? There's no dragons on it. What kind of crap-ass map doesn't have any dragons? And Fire is too small and Lightning is too big! It's total bullshit."
Kakuzu facepalmed. "At least Itachi understood the concept of accurate scale," he grumbled.
No poet had ever been in a position to capture the majesty of dawn in the heavens, Hazō reflected, and perhaps it was his duty to be the first. Being bathed in the unobstructed first rays of the rising sun and watching the light reflect off the clouds below was an incomparable, unique experience.
He was thoroughly sick of it.
"I think it's time for us to throw in the towel," he announced.
The rest of the Team Uplift Expeditionary Force looked up from their breakfasts with a variety of expressions. Yuno, confused. Kei and Snowflake, curious. Akane... relieved?
"Don't get me wrong," Hazō said. "I'm not saying we give up on the Squirrel Scroll for good. I just think it's time we step back and admit that this mission has gone on way longer than expected, our original objective of stealthily retrieving an unowned, unguarded scroll looks like a bust, and if we're going to reliably pull this off, we need different plans, different resources, and maybe even different people."
Seeing Kei and Snowflake nod grimly, he hurried on.
"I'm not saying you guys haven't been doing a great job—all of you—because I couldn't be more proud of my team. It's just that there are things Mari, Noburi, or Kagome-sensei could bring to the table that might open up whole new approaches."
"But we're so close!" Yuno exclaimed, raising her spoon for emphasis as if it was an evil-looking black axe with special grooves for the blood. "Your tracking plan worked almost perfectly. We just need to repeat it a few times, and we'll have the enemy's location, and Panashe has proved she can do all the spying we need!"
"We don't know that for sure," Hazō said. "We don't really know anything for sure, and the way we failed this time—which could have been a lot worse if we hadn't got lucky and hit a tribe the Bear Summoner knew—is proof of that.
"Besides, we're getting near the end of our tackle in other ways. Our supplies aren't infinite. I mean, look at the stuff we're eating now." He gestured at their bowls of Kagome-sensei's Superior Revitalising Porridge, refined since the days he used it to bolster a sick Mari's strength, but still very much focused on health over flavour.
No one argued.
"Then there are the joys of skytower life, with the hygiene issues, the total lack of privacy, the drop to certain death constantly in the back of your mind (especially when you're settling down to sleep), and all the other stuff I won't even mention because ugh. Hands up if you'd spend a single second more living on a skytower if the ground below wasn't swarming with patrols."
Yuno and Akane didn't move. Kei and Snowflake put down their bowls, demonstratively walked to the edge of the platform, and stretched their hands down past the edge. They exchanged surprised, amused looks.
"The other issue," Hazō said after an obligatory eye roll at the girls' hyperbole, "and I feel a little bad about saying this, is that I'm worried about what's going on back in Leaf. I'm not saying I don't trust Noburi to hold down the fort, but he doesn't have the experience yet, and it's possible he hasn't reported something important because he's missed it, or he thinks he's got it handled but he doesn't, or he thinks he'll have it handled by the time we get back and doesn't want to make himself look like a bad regent by running to me for help the second something unexpected happens... And in the end, I'm the Gōketsu clan head. Whatever happens to the clan is my responsibility, and if things go wrong because I've foisted my role off on someone else, that's on me."
Akane cringed.
"I cannot but agree," Kei said. "While I trust Shikamaru to handle those of my functions as second-in-command which should have been his to begin with, at least to an acceptable extent and for a certain time, I am less sanguine in regard to the KEI. I do not even know if Ami is presently in Leaf, considering her new responsibilities, and while a thousand shadow clones' daily practice would not allow me to be Naruto's palest shadow as a charismatic leader, he is not one of nature's administrators, and also possesses a regrettable tendency to run with his latest exciting idea with limited consideration of its long-term pitfalls. Ordinarily, Ami and I possess veto powers he has chosen to respect—awareness of his flaws being one of his virtues, and a remarkable one given his heroic status—but Fujisawa, my own second-in-command, is a Leaf shinobi born and bred, and views him with a natural awe that is not conducive to applying the reins when needed. I recall his recent hare-brained idea of encouraging KEI unity by marketing foodstuffs associated with the coordinators, and while it is entirely his right to be represented by a ramen topping if he so desires, I refuse to countenance the production of 'Kei cakes', and even my sister found herself with mixed feelings about 'Amitsu jelly'. Fujisawa, with her distorted perceptions of all three of us, might not have displayed the same wisdom."
"I'm on board too," Akane said after a hesitant second. "This... This isn't really the mission I signed up for anymore. I was OK with finding a lost scroll that its original owners had given up on. Mostly OK. It was supposed to be their precious holy treasure, not just a tool for war like the Arachnid Scroll in Earth. But if it was going to lie buried under a stump somewhere for the rest of time otherwise, I thought it would be better where it could do some good for Uplift."
She looked down into her porridge. "Also... I know I'm a terrible person for thinking this way, but I was just a little bit jealous of all the Seventh Path adventures everybody else in my family got to go on, and this entire amazing world they got to see."
"Your feelings are misplaced," Kei said, softly enough Hazō almost didn't catch it.
She went on at normal volume. "Akane, this is and only ever was a mission of rational power maximisation. Every shinobi in the world, or at least every shinobi one can expect to survive, would react in the same fashion to a summoning scroll seemingly within arm's reach. Consider the apocalypse of which we have forewarning and an opportunity to find salvation only through Hazō's ownership of the Dog Scroll, the casualties spared Leaf by"—she spoke the words with a touch of distaste—"the Zoo Rush, derived from Noburi's use of the Toad Scroll, and indeed the great financial and other benefits we have derived from our association with the Pangolins at the low, low price of continental war and the genocide of strangers. To be a shinobi is to reach for power, whether for survival or for the sake of ambition, and if in this instance the only cost is the hurt feelings of believers of a heretical religion, then no sane shinobi would hesitate."
"I know," Akane replied. "I know. And I realise I'm in no position to lecture anyone on ethics. Only... I thought we wanted to be better than that. I thought we wanted to be better than ordinary ninja.
"As for hurt feelings, don't you remember what we did to Isan? The outcome of us wanting power and not caring about people's religion? Isn't that enough?"
"What you did to Isan was destiny," Yuno cut in. "It was Ui's will. You've got nothing to be ashamed of. You didn't do anything wrong, apart from Noburi breaking my heart, and he's trying to atone for that. Everything that happened after was the people of Isan paying for their own sins. If their faith had been pure, they wouldn't have leapt into the arms of an evil dictator. Nobody forced them to do that." Her lips twisted in disgust. "The High Priest didn't hold a kunai to their throats and make them ostracise people they didn't like—more than before, I mean. You coming to Isan was supposed to fulfil the prophecy and bring us freedom, and then they used that freedom to do evil because they are all horrible people who deserve to burn." She looked to Satsuko as if for agreement, then nodded in satisfaction.
"I believe we have long since agreed to disagree on this matter," Kei said. "Still..."
"Does there come a point when one aspiring to superior ethics should cease to reach for power?" Snowflake asked, looking vaguely into the distance. "It is not a natural thought, given the vast benefits Team Uplift has derived from it since your helpless missing-nin days, including my very existence..."
Silence reigned.
"Either way," Hazō said eventually, "that's a decision for later. For now, I think there's a consensus that going home wouldn't be the worst idea ever. But how about we swing by Honey on our way back?"
"What's in Honey?" Yuno asked.
"The Caverns of Mild Peril, according to Orochimaru's notes," Hazō explained. "Back when we traded with him, he gave us some notes of his from when he was passing through Honey. Apparently, he took shelter from the rain in a random cave, and discovered that it was actually this unique biome—that's what he called it—full of what he considered valuable plants and creatures. But he was in a hurry to get back to his lab, and apparently harvesting and transporting samples would have taken too much time and effort, so he just noted down the entrance he'd found to the cave complex, plus some field notes in cryptic Orochimaru style, and moved on."
Yuno's eyes lit up with an unhealthy glow. "You mean there will be chakra beasts? New and unique chakra beasts?"
"That would be the implication," Kei said in a much drier tone. "I wish to note at this point that 'mild peril' is presumably 'mild' by the standards of a functionally immortal demigod with unique expertise in aberrant lifeforms."
"Sure," Hazō said. "But do I need to list all the stuff we've survived, starting with the Swamp of Death and ending with Hagoromo Ritsuo's bad breath? I'm not saying we shouldn't be careful, and I'm definitely not saying we should do more on this trip than see if we can locate the entrance and maybe take a quick look at the less deadly area near it. But I promised Snowflake a Gōketsu-style adventure, and overcoming powerful threats in defiance of incredible odds is as Gōketsu as it gets."
Snowflake gave a small, sheepish smile. Was it just him, or did she smile more often these days than he was used to from Kei?
"I appreciate the thought, Hazō, but I would not wish to place the team in danger merely for my sake."
Hazō smiled back confidently. "Don't get me wrong, Snowflake. That's just one of my many motivations. Another is new sources of wealth and power for the Gōketsu—even if Orochimaru has already been back and got everything he wanted, it'll all be locked up in his lab, and I'll eat my necromancy notes if there's nobody out there with an interest in unique chakra beasts and their individual components. And another, in a way the most important one, is that there is nobody in Team Uplift who doesn't like the taste of adventure."
Kei silently raised her hand.
"And yet I notice that you came along without any complaints."
"As ever," Kei fired back, "somebody needed to be present to prevent disaster stemming from ill-considered decisions on your part. I assure you, I would much rather be at home, memorising the new tax compliance regulations."
"Which would take you all of five minutes," Hazō said. "But all right, we'll leave it at that.
"Any actual objections? No? Then let's get packing. The sooner we're done making historic discoveries no human has made before, the sooner we can get home and sleep in proper beds."
No Mist drill sergeant had ever been obeyed with such great haste.
"You summoned me, sir?" Goro said, kneeling seiza in the door with his back perfectly straight, knees two fists apart, hands on his thighs.
Clan Lord Hyūga Neji, father of Goro's elder brother, sat at his desk in the corner. He was writing two separate documents at the same time, brushes moving with speed yet exquisite elegance. Goro's Byakugan was running, as per his Clan Lord's expectation of proper Hyūga behavior even if it did eat chakra like dango, and it showed him that the document on the left was a letter to Goro's elder brother and the one on the right was a ledger calculating expected income from various Hyūga properties for the next quarter.
Eita waited silently on his Clan Lord's pleasure. The silence dragged on for at least two minutes.
"I am informed that you have trained an outsider in our taijutsu," the Clan Lord said, not looking up. "You will stop."
"My Lord, I did not teach him the Gentle Fist, merely—"
"You will stop."
"...Yes, My Lord."
"That is all."
"Yes, My Lord."
o-o-o-o
The day was cold, the skies gray, and the sun only barely risen when the team arrived at Training Ground Thirty-Seven. Goro was the last to arrive.
"'Morning," Hayata said, waving as his white-eyed teammate jogged up. "Good timing. How are things?"
Coming from another, Goro might have interpreted the 'good timing' to be a subtle jab, a suggestion of Goro's inferiority for having arrived after everyone else. Coming from Hayata, Goro interpreted it to mean that the others had arrived only within the last few minutes.
"Things are..." Goro began, before trailing off. He had no way to finish that sentence.
The other two eyed him for a moment and then Eita asked, his face and voice completely calm, "How is your father? Spent any time with him lately?"
Goro forced his teeth not to clench at the thought. "I did indeed speak with my Clan Lord last night," he said. "I regret to say that he has forbidden me from sharing Hyūga clan taijutsu techniques. Or, apparently, any taijutsu techniques, since everything I have been showing you two was based on that independent study I did with Yada-sensei."
Eita nodded, unsurprised. The lack of surprise made Eita flush with shame; what must a life be like to make its bearer simply assume he would never receive help from anyone?
"But it's not Hyūga stuff!" Hayata objected. "Did you tell him that?"
"I tried. I'm sorry, both of you."
"It is what it is," Eita said. "No worries. I'm just grateful for what you did share."
"I could put a word in with Yada-sensei?" Goro suggested. "He might be willing to..." He trailed off. It was a ridiculous suggestion. Yada Kazuharu did not take on students, not even temporarily. Not unless they came with the name of a Great Clan and a massive pile of ryō. The man was obsessed. All he cared about was his own training, his own skill. He had been compared repeatedly to the Green Beast of the Leaf, Maito Gai. Unfortunately, the comparisons were usually to the negative—not as friendly, not as inspirational, and, most damning of all, not quite as good. It was hard to surpass someone who now lived only in legend, and the need to do so had taken over Yada's life.
"It's fine, thanks." Eita smiled and gave his teammate a nod. "I appreciate the offer."
"Your Clan Lord can—" Hayata began angrily, only to cut himself off when Goro raised an interrupting hand.
"My Clan Lord has spoken," Goro said calmly. "He is the wisest of the clan and therefore obedience to him is obedience to wisdom. I shall not be able to offer instruction again. I apologize to both of you. Now, if you will excuse me, I wish to do a few kata before we eat."
The others looked surprised. The tradition among Team Honoka was to eat a light meal before training. That was the entire reason for getting here at this unholy hour.
"I shall be training in Yada-sensei's fourth basic kata," Goro said. "I wish to be certain that it does not fade from my memory due to insufficient practice."
Eita's eyebrow went up. All three of them knew that the odds of Goro forgetting a taijutsu kata were approximately equal to the chances of Hyūga Clan Lord Hyūga Neji ever getting the stick removed from his ass.
"Should you wish to eat without me, please feel free," Goro continued. "Alternatively, if you wish to do your own training then we can eat together afterwards." He activated his Byakugan and turned away, taking a few steps until he had space and then settling into the guard stance of Yada-sensei's kata.
"Let's see..." Goro murmured to himself. "Ah, yes. My back leg should be straight." He carefully straightened his leg in exactly the way that he had been nagging Eita about. "Yes, that's better." He began the kata, performing it slowly and very precisely. He smiled, very slightly, when the others joined in behind him, precisely copying his movements. Well, almost precisely. He shifted his arm to match the position of Eita's and then stopped.
"No, that's not right," he mumbled, clearly thinking out loud. "Let's see...oh, right, I'm not closing the line properly." He very carefully moved his arm the necessary two inches back to proper position, then resumed the kata.
They ran the kata four times before sitting together for their usual light breakfast. After all, Psycho-sensei would descend on them soon enough and they had best not be working on empty stomachs.
o-o-o-o
"You summoned me, sir?" Goro said, kneeling seiza in the door with his back perfectly straight, knees two fists apart, hands on his thighs.
Clan Lord Hyūga Neji turned in his chair, facing his younger son. His face was utterly blank, the perfect Hyūga mask.
"I instructed you not to train that mudfoot," he said. His voice was perfectly calm, almost disinterested.
"Yes, My Lord...?" Goro said, his voice filled with all the innocent confusion that Psycho-sensei had convinced Mari-sensei to teach them how to portray. "I have ceased all instruction of anyone."
"You were leading taijutsu training with your team, precisely as you always do," the Clan Lord said, a trace of irritation leeching into his words.
"Respectfully, My Lord, I did not lead their training. I did my own training, as was appropriate for a training period. If they happened to copy me, I have nothing to say. Their taijutsu is inferior to mine, much less to Yada-sensei's. Is it surprising they would wish to steal a few crumbs?"
The Clan Lord eyed him calmly. "Goro, do you think me an idiot?"
"No, My Lord!"
"Do not train your teammates in taijutsu. I did not expend such wealth as was required to retain Yada simply to have it given for free to mongrels. That training is yours, to preserve your life."
"With respect, My Lord, does not the survival of my teammates also contribute to my own survival?"
The Clan Lord's teeth ground together. "The training is yours. It is to your honor and you will not cast it into the dirt."
It was to the Hyūga's honor, is what he meant. Certainly, the family was wealthy enough that they could afford to retain Yada for their eldest son and heir. Most of the Great Clans could do that. The Hyūga were so very wealthy they could even afford to have their spare be trained by the legend.
"Of course, My Lord," Eita said, bowing dogeza. He held the pose for two seconds, then straightened. "I will not show my teammates any more of Yada-sensei's instruction. Nor will I practice it where they might copy me. I apologize for my disobedience."
The Clan Lord eyed his second son for several seconds before saying, "You are dismissed."
o-o-o-o
"Morning!" Eita called, jogging up for their barely-dawn gathering. "Mom made omelettes!" He held up one of the many storage seals that Lord Kagome had pushed into the team's hands after discovering that Psycho-sensei had not properly outfitted them.
"Fifty?! You only gave them fifty storage seals each?!?! How are they supposed to carry the full load-out with only fifty seals?!"
"Aw, Uncle Kagome, don't be silly! They don't need the full load-out."
"WHHHAAAAT!?!?!?!?! Mari, grab her! I need to check her ears!"
Lord Kagome had been closely supervising them ever since then, ensuring that they were properly equipped and requiring them to frequently demonstrate that they were carrying everything he felt they should have. This was challenging, since he would occasionally add some new item to the list of things they were expected to have and not bother telling them in advance.
"How would you survive meeting a brindlebeast if you didn't have six pounds of peanuts on you? Huh? Huh?! Stupid stinking kids, always thinking they know so much, why I oughta—
"What's a brindlebeast, Uncle?" Psycho-sensei had asked. "I don't remember this story."
"You don't remember it?! You foolish child, have you forgotten everything I've ever taught you?!"
"Aw, Unc, don't be like that! I remember everything. Like what to carry with me and the six types of traps and—"
"SIX?! SIX?! There are twelve kinds of traps!"
"Are you sure? I really thought it was six..."
"Come with me, right now! You three...oh, fine, I suppose you can come too. You're Honoka's, and that means you're kinda clan. And it would make her look bad if you died because you didn't know how to properly protect a camp." He frowned, then looked over to Honoka. "It would make you look bad, right?"
"Yup! Very bad."
Lord Kagome nodded in satisfaction. "Nailed it. Come on, all of you."
If that was the level of detailed instruction required of people who were 'kinda' clan, Goro shuddered to think what the actual clan children must be required to learn.
As he came to a halt, Eita saw the look on Goro's face. Or, rather, the lack of a look. Goro was wearing the Hyūga mask. That never had good news behind it. With a sigh, Eita unsealed the three bento boxes (omelettes with a side of pickled ginger and dango because Mom thought that it was important to have sweets in order to keep energy up) and passed them around. Goro had been writing in a small journal, but he happily put it down on the grass and accepted the bento in its place.
"Thank you very much, Eita," Goro said. He opened his and paused to inhale the scent of breakfast. An expression of quiet delight drifted across his face for a moment, as it did for everyone who smelled Tanaka Haruyo's cooking.
"I'm afraid that I have bad news," Goro said. "My Clan Lord has instructed me not to train anyone in taijutsu of any kind, nor to practice where I might be seen."
Eita's stomach dropped, but then it rebounded and his eyes narrowed slightly instead. There was something odd in Goro's voice.
"I would suggest that—" Goro broke off. "Oh dear, I have forgotten to use the bathroom. Obviously, as a proper son of the Hyūga, I cannot simply urinate on a tree like a peasant. No, I shall have to go back into Leaf to find a proper toilet. Please, eat without me. I will be back soon." He stood up and dashed off, his foot carelessly spurning the journal that he had left sitting on the grass. It flopped open to a page showing a diagram of a person in a combat stance.
Eita and Hayata shared confused looks. After a moment, Eita reached over and picked up the journal, glancing at the contents. Hayata leaned in, looking over his shoulder.
Dragon Hammer Kata: Yada-sensei emphasized the importance of this one as a counter to the soft/hard style used by many Mist ninja. The steps are as follows: start in stance #3, then...
For one moment, Eita's heart stopped beating. One did not write down the secrets of training obtained from another ninja. Or, at least, not in straightforward, unencoded language such as this.
And then his heart started up again and he struggled not to smile.
"Very careless of Goro to leave this behind," he said, closing the book and tucking it into the bento that his white-eyed teammate had abandoned. He put the whole bento back into its seal. "I will return it to him when he returns."
"Yes," Hayata said, his voice serious and his nod grave. "Or tomorrow, if you happen to forget that you have it." Pause. "Hey, would you like to come over for dinner tonight?" And make two copies of this book of treasure went unsaid.
"That sounds lovely," Eita said, his voice equally serious. "Very careless of Goro to leave it here."
"Yes. Very careless indeed."
It was a lovely plan, but I fear I had no juice. I hate not delivering on Sunday and I didn't want to take a chance on breaking my streak by not being able to write tonight, so I decided to do something light and fluffy that I could knock out before work. Apologies, and I shall transfer the baton to the eldritch talons of @Velorien.
(Note: This is in Threadmarks for now but will later move to Sidestory.)
Vote time! You have two choices:
[] Continue the plan
[] Plan name here, details below
Personally, I would suggest sticking with 'continue the plan'; it's a fun one and a lot of work went into it. Still, you deserve the chance to change your mind if so desired.
Hazō raised a hand in general greeting as a few of the farmers on the village outskirts noticed him approaching along the overgrown road. Even with the oncoming sunset, many of the farmers had kept working their fields. They warily watched his approach.
He'd sent drawings to Noburi of the clothing he'd seen in the Honey port-town to commission a copy, but the farmers wore their chests bare, with only a simple cloth wrap around their waist. He looked very different in his high-necked shirt and overly puffy pants. He mentally adjusted his backstory.
Hazō walked to a comfortable speaking range, careful not to project his voice like a Clan Lord. "Hello all! I'm a traveler from the big town over that way," he said, gesturing vaguely to the west. "I have business around these parts and I thought I'd try to pass the night under one of your roofs. My name is Ayuma, and I've been walking since nearly sun-up."
The farmers looked between themselves and scanned him, but between the makeup on his hands and face and the bulky stuffed pockets in his clothing, they didn't recognize him as a ninja.
One of them spoke up. "Welcome, Ayuma, ahm Iyo. We ain't much fer a traveler like you, but I could find ya a dry place ta sleep, and some veggie stew to fill yer belly up. Here, follow me. My home's this way," he said, turning.
Hazō raised his hands. "Ah, sorry. I would be glad to enjoy your hospitality, Iyo, but I also want to know what the area is like. Like I said, I have business around here. Is there a town elder or a village chief that I could speak with before I turn in for the night?"
Hazō quickly touched a palm to the side of his head. "Oh, and I'm sorry for making a request without offering anything myself." He unslung his pack and opened it up. "Here, you've clearly been hard at work. These are candied meats from a smokery in town. And of course, Iyo, I can pay for the bed and food."
A few of the farmers relaxed when he unwrapped and offered them the cloth sack of candied meats. They could see no weapons inside his pack, and no tax collector would offer food to ordinary farmers. A few of them took up his offer, and Iyo offered to lead him to the village's chief.
Hazō observed the village as he followed Iyo, though he couldn't give it a ninja-quality scan in disguise. Even this far East, the farmers mainly grew rice with only a few vegetable patches, though no vegetables he recognized (notably, they seemed docile enough to keep within a dozen meters of the house with only a singly-reinforced fence). Most interesting to Hazō was the livestock, which quietly grazed in an enclosure nearly as big as the village itself. The creatures looked like giant, hairless wombats. Hazō's full height only reached the shoulder of the smallest, and the largest was four meters tall lying down on its six meaty paws.
Before long, Hazō was seated in the chief's house. The chief wore the same simple white-cloth wrap around his waist with a rich purple sash across his bare chest. Hazō saw similar hints of bright colors amidst the drabness of the clothing of the chief's wife and their half-dozen kids.
The chief's wife had been cooking a surprisingly elaborate and delicious-smelling meal when Hazō had arrived. He closed his eyes to appreciate the smell – they definitely had fewer spices than in Leaf, but he thought he could detect a new scent. Maybe he'd try to buy some of the new spice for Kagome-sensei.
"So, Ayuma," the chief said, making Hazō flick his eyes back open after waiting for a civilian's reaction time to pass, "I'm Toshi, a leader in the village. That don't mean much, just that I made good decisions in tough times and tha' people started trustin' me. I ain't gonna have a lot that can help you, I'm sorry."
"I'm sure you know lots about the area," Hazō said, "There's a big cave somewhere around these parts. My brother came out here a month ago looking for it, and I haven't heard from him since. Do you know anything about it?"
Of course, Hazō knew the chief would know. They'd found the cave only yesterday. Yuno had noticed strange animal trails after four days of painstaking searching, and Hazō had summoned Canvass (who seemed mildly irritated that they'd called off the search for the Squirrel Scroll) to track down Orochimaru's cavern. While there, they had noticed an overgrown footpath that led to this village. After brief discussion, the team had agreed that Hazō should approach the village and determine what they knew.
The chief grimaced. "Well, traveler, ain't no easy way to say it, but your brother's dead. If he went lookin' 'side the cave without knowing the proper rituals, ain't no way he came back out."
"You know where the cave is?" Hazō said. "Could you tell me about it?"
The chief shook his head. "I don't think I will, not if you're gonna follow your fool brother and get your ass killed. You seem like a proper fella, Ayuma, and I wouldn't want ta do that to ya."
One of the kids ran into Hazō mid-game – Hazō noticed in time to avoid instinctively grabbing the little boy in a joint lock. The chief grabbed his son by the arm and yanked hard, pulling the kid away from Hazō. He raised his hand to whack the boy on the head. "Don't bother the guest, idiot piglet!"
Hazō leaned forward as quickly as he thought a civilian could manage to lay a hand on the boy's shoulder, putting his arm in the way of the father's blow. "It's fine, really. I'm sorry for getting in your way." He smiled, shoving down the anger he felt.
The chief glanced over to him, then swatted the boy on the butt with his raised hand. The boy gave a light yelp and Hazō let go, gently pushing him away. "Mind your manners, boy!" the chief said as the boy went to sit with his sisters.
He turned back to Hazō. "Anyway, don't get yourself killed. The cave's bad to people who ain't know what they're doin'."
Hazō nodded. "So you can go into the cave safely?"
"Well, we do go in there sometimes," the chief said, clearly uncomfortable. "Not a bunch, you see, just into the top bit to grab some moss and leaves for our herb-witch. And not too much either, since that angers the Lady Below."
"So… what do you do to enter it safely then?" Hazō asked
The chief glared at him. "I ain't tellin' you where it is, and I'll tell no one else to tell you neither."
Hazō raised his hands. "I promise you, I have no desire to lose my life. I…" Hazō trailed off, looking into his lap for a second, then back up. "I thought my brother might be dead, since he was supposed to return after two weeks, and you know how dangerous it can be in the wilds here. Still, I traveled here because I felt, and still feel, some hope. I won't go if it'll get me or anyone else killed. I just want to know about it."
The chief scoffed. "Well, that's truth if ever I heard it. You ain't had no weapons coming into town, means any little creature in the woods could make a meal of you. If your brother was the same, I'd bet he got himself eaten too, and not by the cave."
Hazō smiled. "I may have gotten lucky, but my brother is skilled with his sword. Are you sure he didn't pass through?"
The chief shook his head. "You're the first traveler in a month."
Hazō nodded. "And there's no other village that knows about the cave?"
"None that I ever saw."
"Well," Hazō said, "I'd want to know more about the cave. I won't get myself killed. I just want to know what's in there to judge if my brother would really have been dead."
The chieftain eyed him for a long moment, then sighed. "The cave's the home of an old kami from a long, long time ago, long before the Sage came 'round. Sage stuffed the kami at the bottom and chained her up, which made her real mad. Worse, the sun don't shine deep down in the cave, meanin' nothin' much grows. That means she's really, really hungry. She'll eat near anyone or anything that goes in there."
"But you said you can go in there?"
"Yeah, well. First you gotta purify yourself, and mark yourself with the oils. We get the whole village together to pray to harden the soul of the one goin' in, since even if their body comes out fine, sometimes she eats the soul and sends a husk of a man back out. The herb-witch makes special charms, and they gotta get out before it's all burned up. No one goes more'n eighty eight paces into the cave, and we never send anyone in till half a year past the last time. Oh, and after every time someone makes it out alive, we lead one of the gorners in there as an offering."
Hazō frowned. "Are those the livestock creatures I saw coming in?"
"Yeah. And 'fore you ask, we ain't never seen a hint of bone or hide or tooth of 'em left behind. The Lady's very, very hungry."
"Ah," said Hazō. "That makes sense. That sounds very dangerous indeed. Do you know anything more about this… Lady Below?"
The chief scowled. "You're asking an awful lotta questions. Why don't you get on to sleep and head back to your town? There're some things that are too dangerous for the likes of you ta know."
How long does it take to find the town? Orochimaru did not keep highly detailed notes of the path to the cavern – only a few landmarks he remembered passing. The team takes a day and change to cross into Honey, then it takes around 4 days on the ground to find the cave.
How long does it take Hazō to make a disguise? He doesn't really need to care about anything but seeming like a ninja, and he has a little familiarity with some Honey fashions from the port town they set anchor in to copy from (and he can source clothing from Leaf through Noburi – and can probably create decent depictions of what he wants with his skill with the brush). All these factors considered, I think probably "an hour" at most – to make his hands look callused more in a laborer sense, to make his physique seem less Olympic athlete and more strong farmer, and to generally seem a little older.
He'll step up the time ladder twice to 12 hours, and approach the town at sundown the day after they find it. No point in rushing things. His disguise Block:
Hazō (Deceit): 24 + 6 (2x time ladder) + 3 = 33
Best of townsfolk (Alertness/Examination/Deceit/Empathy): ?? - 6 = ??
Can Hazō convince the town chieftain to tell him things about the cave?
Partial success. Hazō doesn't learn everything he would like to, but gets a few interesting tidbits.
-o-
"...next, we only stay in the cave for four hours. That should be around sundown, so we can follow any sunlight to get out. We'll start our retreat in three."
There was a chorus of yesses from the team, so Hazō moved on to the next point of the Caverns of Mild Peril Exploration Preparatory Checklist.
"All shadow clones are to be summoned as far ahead of time as possible, to give their Primes the most time possible to recover their chakra."
Crystal rolled her eyes and Spiral clearly resisted the urge to commit self-popping-by-facepalm.
"Hazō," Spiral said, "we have been present since nearly sundown yesterday to give Kei adequate time to recover her chakra. Over that period, you have made us sit through nearly a half-dozen of your unholy panoply of Sage-foresaken checklists. Do you really need to remind us of such trivial things?"
Hazō quickly flipped to the next item on the checklist before Spiral could get herself going. To his side, Akane, Akane, and Akane looked sympathetically at him and reached out their hands to rub his arm. After a shared moment of confusion between them, only one of them gave him a gentle pat of reassurance.
"Right. Next, our objectives are, in order: First, to ensure that all members of the Expedition Team remain free from bodily harm, prioritizing prevention of death, maiming, lasting injury, and dispelling in that order. Second, to scout, map, and establish safe lines of entry and retreat for the Caverns of Mild Peril, to allow expeditions on future days to quickly achieve greater depth and to ensure that in the event that we are overmatched by the beasts within, that we will be able to achieve the first objective. Third, to acquire a diversity of samples to return to Leaf so that we can inform potential future expeditions. Fourth, to safely harvest anything marked in Orochimaru's notes as being particularly valuable."
Another chorus of yesses, though Hazō could tell that Crystal and Spiral were a little offended at dispelling being the least important injurious outcome to prevent.
"Has everyone bathed in the river, marked themselves with those oils we stole from the town, and done preparatory meditations? From the townspeople's myths, it sounded like we're dealing with predators that hunt by scent, possibly with some sort of psychic attack."
Another chorus of yesses. "And in the event of encountering enemy ninja-"
"Which is vanishingly unlikely, given Canvass's absence of observation of any human scents but our own in the last month or so," said Crystal. "And if we do encounter hostile ninja, prioritize escape, preferably breaking line-of-sight if skywalkers are to be used. As you have already mentioned. Thrice."
Hazō winced slightly. He hadn't really spent that much time going over the various protocols, had he? After all, he'd spent hours on the Seventh Path, checking in with Cantelope to see if the Dog would be free this evening for the expedition, and going over the checklists with him. Still, this was for Snowflake's benefit, even if she had opted for her sisters to have the first run into the cavern. He could afford to tone it down.
"Okay, and we've already covered the specific protocols. Yuno," he said, looking at the pink-haired woman who was bouncing gently on the balls of her feet with Satsuko clutched close to her chest, "I'll be the tactical commander, but you have override and veto power. If your battle intuition or your understanding of the beasts says I'm making a bad call, you can decide what to do. Everyone should follow your lead."
Yuno nodded, then looked to the cavern mouth. The semicircular opening in the rocky outcropping lay at the bottom of a deep channel in the ground, surrounded by grasses and trees on either side. The grass even led into the mouth of the cave before thinning out into dirt, and any wildlife or plants beyond that point were much sparser. She looked back to him, but Hazō could tell she too was anxious to get started.
"Alright cavern, here comes Team Gouketsu. Summoning Technique: Cantelope!"
-o-
Despite the warnings of the townsfolk, the entry had been peaceful. Everyone wore Jiraiya's Daybright Lantern Seals on their waists, which lit the spaces of the cavern quite evenly. One seal alone would have left many shadowed cracks and crevices for beasts to hide out in, but with eight ninja total (only half of them made of meat), there was little risk of a close-quarters ambush.
The cavern was quite big, too – easily ten meters wide and half as tall, though it narrowed as they got deeper into the cave. A surprising variety of plants and mosses and funguses grew in the cavern's entryway – to no surprise, as Kei noted, since this area would reliably receive both sunlight and biomass washing into the cave from the forest above. Akane's shadow clone Hydrangea took the lead in sampling the cavern's flora and leaving them on a tarp by the cave entrance. Tonight, Kei would hand them off to Noburi, who would hopefully tell the expedition team which ones were worth harvesting.
The ambient life steadily diminished deeper in the cave. Cantelope had been moderately interested in the plants (none of whom put up much of a fight for Hydrangea), but focused more on the patterns and striations on the cave walls. They continued their descent until Yuno raised a hand.
"There's something up ahead. It's some kind of buzzing, and it's getting closer."
Cantelope bounded to Yuno's side, pointing his ears forward. "I can hear it too. Either some bugs are having a party up ahead, or they're coming to get us."
The buzzing suddenly crescendoed as a flying swarm of bulbous black-green bugs turned the corner into the main space of the cavern. Hazō felt his conscious thoughts stop.
Relax.
There is no need to fight.
The wordless sensation washed over him as the buzzing sound expanded. In the drone of the insect-wings, he heard chirps and bird calls and frog ribbits and human humming.
There is no you. There is no self. We are all one.
You are one with the mountain. You are no creature of flesh and blood. Lay down your body and free your soul.
Hazō shook his head. The pressure felt like a genjutsu compelling him to stop moving and sink into the stone around him. He bent low, then pushed himself to the cavern wall. He needed to take them down before the effect could mount and reduce him to a simpleminded statue.
The rest of Team Uplift clearly thought the same. Kei, Crystal, and Spiral were quick to throw explosive tags into the swarm. A few of the bugs managed to outmaneuver the explosions, but the rest of the team was able to quickly bring them down. As the last few bugs fled, the team stepped on the ground again, the air now rich with the acrid smell of the insect's blood. None of the ninja had been affected by the psychic onslaught, but…
"Cantelope," Hazō said, approaching his summon. "Cantelope! Can you hear me?"
He waved his hands in front of the Dog's face, but there was no response. He looked around at his allies, then back to Cantelope. The Dog was sitting calmly on the ground, his head resting on his forepaws with eyes half-open and dull, while his tail rested half-curled on the ground behind him. He was barely breathing. If the swarm had its way, it probably would have reduced them all to that state and eaten their still-living bodies.
Hazō made the handseal of dismissal, and Cantelope disappeared in a pop of smoke. After a moment's thought, he drew blood from his arm again and said "Summoning Technique: Cantsuru!" and Hazō kneeled down beside the fluffy sheepdog puppy to scratch his ears.
"Summoner," said Cantsuru, stepping next to Hazō and nosing his leg. "Where is this?"
"Don't worry about it, Cantsuru. It's a cave we were exploring. Cantelope was with us, but his mind got hurt by something we fought. Can you take us back to Dog so I can check in with him and Cannai?"
"Sure thing," said Cantsuru.
Hazō looked around at his team. "Camp out here for a few minutes. I'll talk with Cannai to make sure he'll be okay."
-o-
Candoru sniffed the ground. "This place sucks. It's all damp and musty and there's way too many bugs." The team kept on slowly walking down the cave branch, and after a moment, the dog bounded forward to catch up.
"You're not wrong," said Hazō. "But we're here for good reason. Noburi, the Toad Summoner, already said that many of the plants we found would be useful. We're saving lives here, in a roundabout way."
Noburi had been moderately enthusiastic about the things they'd found on their first trip two days ago, but nothing stood out as particularly valuable. Orochimaru had noted a few things of interest, but the team had yet to find anything that had once caught the Sannin's eye. Instead, since the first expedition, they'd mostly been mapping the caverns – they now knew a few more surface entrances, all much smaller than the main entrance, and had marked out many branching points.
"Then why aren't we back there, getting more of those plants?" asked Candoru.
"Because we can do that on our way out," said Hazō, as they slowed to a stop where the cave narrowed into a diagonal crevice. Hydrangea raised her Daybright Lantern seal and stepped forward to examine it. "And there's more valuable stuff deeper within. The Snake Summoner himself said so."
Candoru sniffed again. "Well, unearthing hidden treasures isn't the worst way to go."
Hazō shrugged. "You're not in danger. Cannai said Cantelope would probably recover, and most of the stuff in here will kill you the old-fashioned way, like in the iron mine."
Candoru huffed his annoyance, but didn't respond.
Hydrangea looked back at the party. "I think it opens up after a few meters," she said, thumbing at the crevice. "I'll shimmy through and make sure it's safe on the other side."
With no dissent, Hydrangea clipped the Daybright seal to her belt and turned sideways to fit herself through the crevice. She'd been taking the lead on all the dangerous things, while Zinnia, Akane's other Shadow Clone, had kept close to Hazō. Akane clearly didn't want to repeat the nearly-lethal Squirrelfolk incident. Hazō noticed Snowflake watching thoughtfully as Hydrangea worked her way deeper into the crack. They'd had quite the conversation earlier…
"...so I should be the one to test anything dangerous," Hydrangea said. She looked at Yuno. "Yes, even if you're better at killing chakra beasts. It's better that I die first and we get forewarning and some information before the rest of us have to fight… whatever it is."
Snowflake suddenly spoke. "You needn't phrase things so dramatically. Your existence will not end in any meaningful sense as a consequence of being dispelled!"
Hydrangea turned to her. "Snowflake, I know that, but-"
"You clearly have no fear of death, as evidenced by your willful volunteering to be the bait dangled at the end of the metaphorical fishing line. Your provocative phrasing disregards the experience of shadow clones that have not yet been directed by their creators to die."
Hydrangea looked at Akane, then back to Snowflake. "Snowflake, Prime didn't order me to do this. It's my idea. And yes, I'm a copy of Prime, but that just means if I– if she spent some time in a shadow clone body, thinking about how to help the team, she would come up with this."
Snowflake looked at Akane. "You would willingly sacrifice yourself to spare your teammates even mild peril?"
"More importantly," said Hydrangea, "I would gladly sacrifice myself for my teammates. I don't know what dying is like, but I think it would be scary and painful. But I'm a shadow clone. I can die for my team without worrying about leaving them alone, and the only harm I suffer is in my own head."
"You are a shadow clone! The only harm that matters is in your own head."
"Yes. And it's not a deficiency. Instead, I could sacrifice myself for the team a hundred times over and still come back. Not everyone gets the chance to throw themselves in front of an attack for their team, and even fewer people do so and survive. No one gets to do it again and again and again.
"Being a shadow clone is a privilege, not a weakness. I never thought it through before now, but I'm glad to keep my teammates a little bit safer from the mission's dangers. It's my own choice to do so."
After a minute, Hydrangea called out that it was all clear on the other side, and the rest of the team shimmied through the crack one by one.
"Perhaps I have overestimated my own chakra control, but I found chakra adhesion on the sides of that crevice surprisingly challenging," Kei said as she squeezed herself out on the other side. She straightened up, dusting off her clothing. "Did any of you observe the same?"
Hazō reached out as Kei stepped away and tried to use chakra adhesion to stick his hand to the stone. Surprisingly, it didn't work. He frowned and tried again, pressing his hand closer to the stone and focusing his chakra control. This time, he felt it take hold. He gave his hand an experimental pull – it was firmly stuck to the stone.
He released the adhesion and pulled his hand away. "Me too. That's strange."
"It was only by chance that I noticed it; had my hand not incidentally slipped on a wet patch of the stone, I would not have realized."
"It's not just the crevice," Yuno said. She flexed her leg at the knee, showing that her foot was firmly adhered to the floor. "It's the ground here too."
Hazō looked at her, then at Kei. "Is it a type of stone that resists chakra adhesion?"
Kei shook her head. "I have never heard of such a thing. Though, given the lengths we needed to go to find it, I cannot rule it out by the absence of evidence in the broader Elemental Nations."
"Huh," Hazō said. "Let's take a sample, then. I bet Kagome would have a field day if he could make parts of his trap array ninja-proof."
After chipping away a few chunks of rock, the team continued down the open cavern. The caverns had been easy to navigate. They'd mapped out all the dead ends in the main cave already, leaving only this path. Hazō had thought they'd need to watch their backs the entire time, there was very little that could sneak up on them, especially since they'd exterminated all the remaining nests of those green-black bugs.
"Hold up," said Candoru. "I smell something strong up ahead. Like the insect leavings at the other nests."
The team stopped, and Candoru gave the air a sniff. Despite caring first and foremost about his (unfortunately, not terribly impressive) ability to tear out the throats of his opponents, Hazō had found that Candoru was a surprisingly good tracker.
"Yeah, about a hundred feet down that way," Candoru said. "Maybe a hundred of 'em, I'd guess."
The team shared a look. With nowhere else to explore, they would need to check this out to get deeper.
Slowly, they approached. Candoru complained only occasionally about the worsening smell, and before long, they could all smell the dull, musky scent of decay. When the cave opened up before them, Hydrangea scouted ahead. They didn't bother covering the Daybright seals – creatures down here had no eyes at all, and without any background noise, stealth was virtually impossible.
A moment later, Hydrangea returned. "It opened up into a massive space, like an amphitheater under a giant dome. There's a bunch of spider-like molted skins but nothing living that I could see. I think they're in the ceiling. I saw a lot of holes up there, though I didn't look closely. A couple tunnels branched off from there."
Hazō nodded, thinking. "We'll need access to the rest of the caverns, and we haven't seen serious combat since we got in here two days ago. I say we go for it. Let's unseal Substitution targets in this cave in case anyone needs to flee and prepare any ninjutsu or seals we can, then spring the ambush. Akane, how big were the shed skins?"
Hydrangea held her hands shoulder width apart. "Around this big."
"Good, neither hard to take down nor hard to hit. We can handle them, and if we can't, I'll seal the hallway with a MEW so we can prepare a more detailed strategy for next time."
Everyone who wasn't a chakra construct cast Ghost Scales for durability. Akane activated her Flame Aura, which made everyone look away for a moment even with their eyes already adjusted to the Daybright seals. Hazō heard Yuno cast "Lightning Style: Thunderburst," but he saw no visible effect.
Then, cautiously, they entered the cave. The hemispherical chamber's floor was uneven, with a steep slope that combined with the strange impediment to chakra-adhesion that made it tough to walk. As Hydrangea said, meter-wide holes dotted the ceiling of the cavern, in some places scattered and in others packed in a dense hexagonal grid.
No creatures flew out to ambush them as they fully entered the room. Hazō scanned for any webs or pitfalls, but found nothing. They walked toward the center of the hemisphere and waited for a moment.
Kei frowned at him. "The kami's appreciation for irony is well known, and you would do well not to tempt them."
"Wait, I can hear them." Yuno said.
Candoru cocked his head, then stiffened, the hair on his back standing up. "Yeah, they're coming."
Hazō lowered himself into a battle-stance, looking up at the ceiling, from where a clacking, chittering sound steadily rose. Kei and her clones had palmed their kunai, and Akane and her clones stood ready on the perimeters of the group. Strangely, Yuno had her eyes closed.
With a sudden sound like crackling lightning, Yuno shot to a larger boulder, then leaped to the ceiling, grabbing the inside of one hole as an insect came crawling out of another. She swung Satsuko and bisected the creature in a spray of turquoise-green gore.
Then its brethren started dropping into the cavern, and things became very, very chaotic.
The creatures were eight-legged, pale white and segmented like millipedes. Their mandibles shined in the seal-born light, and each had a round, bulbous growth streaked with red at their rears. Most of them fell around the outskirts of the group and quickly swarmed in to tear them apart.
Akane and Hydrangea and Zinnia tried to intercept them, but there were too many to hold back. One lunged for Prism, who Substituted back to the entrance of the cave, while another broke past Zinnia to bisect Snowflake between its mandibles, only for Akane to suddenly flicker over and slam an elbow into it that cracked its chitinous head. Candoru had grappled one, rolling around to get a firm bite on any part of its carapace, to no avail.
More streamed from the holes in the ceiling, positioning themselves above the group to drop into their midst. Hazō imagined the battle playing out – these weren't weak creatures; Akane and Yuno were stronger than them individually, but not overpoweringly so. If enough attacked them, they'd all be overrun.
He dashed to Kei, grabbing one of the beasts as it lunged for her back and hurling it aside. "Plug the holes!" he called.
She reacted instantly, reaching into a pocket for a different kunai and aiming it towards the ceiling. The kunai took an insect through the midsection of its carapace. It lost its grip and fell, only for the attached Goo Bomb tag to explode mid-air. The rapidly expanding cloud of goop spread outwards and caught a number of the creatures, and plugged the ceiling holes the beasts had streamed out of.
The dozen creatures on the ground intensified their attack, but their numbers steadily decreased. Akane and her clones were pushed back by the numbers, but they dealt worse than they took. A mandible scraped Hydrangea's thigh, breaking her Pangolin armor, but she tore the mandible off and rammed it through the creature's exoskeleton, while Zinnia grabbed the rear segments of another, planted her foot, heaved, and ripped the creature fully in half.
Prism Substituted back into the group when a creature diverted to the doorway and nearly bit her head off, and Hazō ran to cover her as two of the millipede-like creatures broke away from Akane. Hazō grabbed one mid-leap and forced chakra to his feet to let him adhere. He pulled himself closer to the ground and dashed the creature against the stone in a spray of chitin and ichor. He turned in time to see Prism fail to dodge the other beast's leap. It landed on her chest and quickly swung its head down to try to impale her through the eye with its mandibles, but its claws scratching her chest were enough to dispel her.
Hazō felt a connection snap as Candoru lost his fight with the beast he'd isolated. He realized a moment too late and spun to see Kei wincing slightly with the pain of Prism's sudden dispelling. Her loss of focus lasted just long enough for another beast to tackle her to the ground and close its mandibles around her arm.
Kei screamed. Hazō flickered to her side and grabbed both mandibles in his hands. Some part of his brain noted her arm rubbing against his, but he told it to shut up until it was sure that Kei would keep her arm for more than a few seconds. The beast tried to pinch its mandibles to shatter her bone and to twist its head to tear off her arm in a bloody chunk, and Hazō pulled his hands apart, resisting the beast with brute strength. They held still for a long moment as the battle raged around them, then Hazō won. He pulled his hands apart, ripping the insectoid head in half, and kicked the body aside.
Around him, the battle had slowed. Yuno and Akane were finishing up the last few of the creatures and Kei quickly straightened up, hiding any shakiness as she and Snowflake sniped down the few beasts that had finally decided to flee. Once the room grew quiet, Kei reached her uninjured arm to her opposite shoulder, where the mandibles had torn messily through her sleeve and dug shallow gashes into her flesh.
Hazō took a step towards her, then stopped himself.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"The wound is shallow, and the likelihood of exsanguination is minimal, if that satisfies your question," Kei said, gently probing the wound.
They both jumped at an explosion, and turned to see Snowflake tagging another kunai. She looked over at them and said, "I note that there exist many more holes than creatures we fought. Even accounting for those unable to escape on the behalf of Kagome's Goo Bomb, it stands to reason that there are many more that wait inside their boreholes for some unknown purpose. I have no particular desire or curiosity to make that purpose known."
She activated the explosive and threw the kunai dead-center into another of the holes. Another explosion went off, this time accompanied by a shower of insect gore from the hole in question. Snowflake looked pointedly at Hazō, then grabbed her next kunai.
"Right," he said. "We've been down here long enough. Let's finish off these creatures to spare ourselves the trouble next time, then head back to the surface."
-o-
Conversation was subdued during their next descent. On the one hand, the team had a safe path into the deepest depths of the caverns. On the other hand, the insectoid beasts had posed the team a decent challenge. If the beasts got much stronger, the team would have to retreat with little to show for it.
They returned to the insect's dome room. Kei, Prism, and Crystal had insisted on doing another explosive sweep of all the insect nests, and, after Hazō briefly argued that they should be economical with their explosive tags (prompting a nod from Yuno, laughter from Akane, and a thinly veiled caldera threat from Kei), they did so. Once the chamber had been secured, they set up Lesser Barrier Formation tripwires to warn them if anything approached, then started exploring the side tunnels. There were a few more insect creatures there, but they died swiftly without their former numbers.
Then, the wonders started. In one chamber, a natural waterfall fed a series of small pools, each surrounded by a colorful diversity of plants and fungi. They had found the first location from Orochimaru's notes. He'd said a few of the plants were "very interesting", though he'd not bothered to mention how to harvest them. The team spent some time poking around (and exterminating some beasts in their subterranean riverside homes), taking a variety of samples for Seventh Path delivery.
In another side chamber, long, twisted growths covered the walls of a massive room like gnarled roots of an ancient tree. Among the growths were periodic green, semi-transparent capsules that looked like skull-sized beads of polished jade. Orochimaru had noted these were "rich in nature chakra" and "potentially incredibly useful for research agenda 3c." Hazō instructed the team to turn off their lights, and, just as Orochimaru's notes said, the capsules glowed a faint green in total darkness.
Curiously, Hazō noted that the stone sides of the cave, both in this chamber and in the tunnel leading to it, were streaked periodically with a faint bluish glow. The streaks were barely a centimeter wide at their widest, and the brightness waxed and waned over the course of minutes. The streaks were invisible in normal light, and chipped off pieces lost their glow. Hazō threw the chips in a sample pouch, as the stone was still tough to chakra-adhere to. Sadly, the green capsules proved very hard to harvest, and no one found a way to pull them off the wall without causing the inner light to fade. Once faded, the capsules quickly went putrid in their hands.
In the last chamber, they found the last of the items in Orochimaru's notes, a shallow lake studded by stalactites and stalagmites. Some fish swam in the lake, but the Daybright seals let the team easily evade their attacks. Apparently, the mineral deposits in the stone formations had some unknown value, and the team found a stalagmite with a severed tip, clearly by Orochimaru's previous passage. Whatever the value, storage scrolls apparently destroyed it, so the team broke off a few stalagmites and wrapped them with the other things they'd harvested for Seventh Path transport.
As they returned to the central chamber, Hazō sighed in relief. "Well, this was a complete success. We found everything that Orochimaru noted as valuable."
"He must have stopped at this same chamber, right?" Akane said, gesturing broadly at the hole-dotted hemisphere. "Everything was in the caverns that descended down from here."
Hazō nodded. "Well, everything he kept explicit notes on. Given his normal dry style, he sounded almost excited about what could lay further within, but regretted not having time to delve deeper. Regardless of whether we harvested things correctly, we know enough to attempt future missions. Even better, we have bargaining chips if we want something from Orochimaru in the future, even if that something is just to leave us alone."
"Why don't we go deeper?" asked Yuno. "We've only been down here for a couple hours today and we're all fresh. Shouldn't we find out what he could have been excited about?"
Kei grimaced. "This invites needless danger. For what purpose?"
Prism said, "Orochimaru is prideful, particularly in his immense knowledge. Providing him with samples that he knows are valuable will be enticing to him, but the promise of knowledge yet unknown to him will drive him substantially more. I have a distaste for the man as deep as your own, my sister, but this is a way to gain additional leverage."
"As we know, he is already aware of this place and the potential value within, even if it seems to have slipped his mind. No doubt, even if he were reminded, the odds that he would abandon his 'experiments' in the Basement on a whim are negligible," Crystal said with clear distaste.
"Precisely," said Prism. "This is not something he desires so desperately as to invest time or resources into acquiring it, yet the unknown nature of the potential discoveries will provide a strong incentive to him. I would not dare to say this even makes the barest step towards making him… controllable, but it would greatly improve our positioning in future negotiation, particularly as our experience in the caverns present an ongoing source of value."
Hazō nodded slowly. "That all makes sense. We'll be careful and retreat if we find a fight we can't win, but we do have a safe line of escape. No matter what, this is our last day here. I'm eager to get back to Leaf."
The team descended the last side tunnel, which dipped deeper into the ground than the other chambers. As the tunnel started to grow shallow again, the team stopped. The bottom of the tunnel was completely flooded.
"There is nowhere further to go," said Kei.
"That's not true," said Hazō, "the tunnel could curve back up again."
"I can check," said Hydrangea. "I'll swim in there with a waxed Lantern seal. If I can't surface before I run out of breath, I'll pop and you'll know you need to turn back. Otherwise, I'll come back and tell you it's safe to go ahead."
Hazō nudged Candoru. "Now that's the kind of can-do attitude I want from you."
"I'm not enthusiastic about getting myself killed running stupid errands for you," Candoru grumbled. The Dog still felt grumpy about losing his solo fight against the insectoid creature in the last delve. "Besides, if you wanted that, you should have contracted Cando."
Akane nodded her assent. Hydrangea turned towards the greenish water and started to strip. Hazō looked away for her privacy. After a few moments, he heard the distinctive sounds of wading, then a splash. He turned back towards the water, where the ripples died down and the light of Hydrangea's Lantern seal slowly faded.
All was quiet for over a minute, then Hydrangea's discarded clothes disappeared in a puff of smoke, and Akane and Zinnia gasped and looked around. Hazō was by Akane's side in an instant, putting a hand on her back for support, but she touched her chest, then pushed him away gently.
"It's fine. I'm fine. I- no, Hydrangea died. I saw a place where the cave surfaces, and it's not far. There are a lot of hidden crannies in the cave though, and a school of fish was hiding behind one of them. They swam out when I passed and speared me through the chest before I could get away."
Hazō rubbed her arm. "That complicates things. Kei and I are comfortable underwater," Hazō said, looking at Kei, who nodded, "but I don't think you or Yuno are good swimmers, right?"
Akane nodded, having caught her breath from Hydrangea's dispelling. "We did some swimming in the Academy. It was in the physical fitness routine for the first two years."
"That's… not going to be nearly enough to have any clue how to fight underwater effectively," Hazō said. Akane nodded.
"I haven't really ever swam before," said Yuno.
"Really, never?" Hazō asked.
"No, never. But I think I understand how it works. Hold your breath, push yourself along?"
"Hm. No matter how weak the cavefish are, they'll have a huge advantage in their natural terrain. We need to mitigate that."
Hazō thought for a few seconds, but before any ideas formed, he saw Crystal's face change unreadably. He watched for a second as she worked through what to say.
"In the absence of my beloved sister Snowflake, I believe it falls upon me to remind us all that explosions are remarkably effective underwater. Likewise, however regrettably, in the absence of the aforementioned slayer-of-koi, I believe the duty of piscatory butchery also falls upon me. Hazō, how many of your Activation Relay Seals are waterproofed?
-o-
Crystal slowly swam down the cave. Akane described the ambush location as best she could, but the girl was regrettably imprecise. Fortunately, Crystal didn't need to traverse the entire flooded cavern in a single journey. She passed her last checkpoint and swam three meters further, then unsealed the next Substitution target. She quickly affixed ARS and explosives to the moderately-sized boulder, then swam back to recover her breath.
The plan was fairly straightforward – bait the fish into attacking, then Substitute with a prepared target and remotely trigger the associated explosives by using ARS. With the increased efficacy of shockwaves underwater, any cavefish caught in the blast would likely be killed immediately, though there would be less collateral damage than ideal as the attenuation of the blast would be greater underwater as well, therefore necessitating the otherwise needlessly risky strategy of playing bait. She lamented that Hazō's initial avenues of approach had proven ineffective – how much labor might have been saved had the cavefish simply surfaced when they dumped out their chakra beast scraps for Crystal and Kei and Prism to pick off!
Instead, Crystal cursed that without the Frozen Skein, she too could have creative ideas. Perhaps had she not suggested this course of action, Hazō would have found a solution that did not require her to spend long minutes of her existence swimming to and fro, nearly naked, in the frigid waters of the cavern.
She passed her last checkpoint and started to swim past it when out of the corner of her eye, she saw the fish swim around a rock barrier and towards her. They were not terribly fast. Had they been on land, Crystal could easily have dodged a rush from a beast at that speed, but underwater, her mobility was severely hampered.
The cavefish were strangely shaped, long and flat and lacking in any pigment at all. They had a sharp spine at the tips of their heads akin to a swordfish, yet their bodies were rather bulbous. They clearly meant to impale her with their spiked heads, and they spread somewhat as they approached, presumably to diversify their angles of attack. She waited as long as she could afford before Substituting with the target and triggering the ARS seal. The explosive wave knocked her away and into a chunk of rock protruding from the ceiling, which barely didn't dispel her. She quickly turned and saw chunks of fish gore floating in the water where she had just been, but a pair of surviving cavefish, whether by being on this side of the explosion or merely too far to be substantially affected by the munition, had turned and started rushing at her.
Crystal closed her eyes. Regrettably, she would not have the chance to bait the cavefish down the length of the passageway, exterminating them one by one with the prepared chain of targets – they had recovered too quickly from the explosion. She gripped the explosive tag in her hand as the approaching cavefish closed the distance.
Once again, we are triggering timer-zero explosives to kill fish at the cost of our own existence, in order to provide a passing benefit to the remainder of our team. Truly, it will be a long time before we find that saner place.
She opened her eyes and triggered the explosive.
-o-
Prism winced as the memory came back to her, then sighed.
Before Kei could say anything, Prism spoke first. "It was moderately successful, but I now see an alternate strategy with greater potential efficacy. As many hostile beasts still remain, I suppose I too will need to sacrifice my fleeting existence on the altar of fish."
As she prepared her seals, she thought to Snowflake and Crystal who would soon receive her memories. One day. One day, we will no longer be required to kill fish.
-o-
Hazō emerged from the water on the far side of the cave to see Yuno drying herself off with a towel pulled from a storage seal in her waterproofed belt pouch. He quickly averted his gaze before Satsuko decided to do to him as she did to girls that might have given similar gazes to Noburi. He trusted Akane to check that she needed no more help after the suicide rush of the last few cavefish had given her a shallow graze. Unfortunately, all Yuno's skills in chakra-beast hunting were terrestrial, and for the first time, he'd seen a beast give Yuno a scratch. A tiny scratch that he wasn't sure would even bleed, but a scratch nonetheless.
He appreciated the brave sacrifices of Crystal and Prism. Two cavefish were manageable underwater, but an entire school would have wiped the team out. He remembered the Swamp of Death, where chakra beasts managed to take out jounin who were out of their element.
Once everyone had dried off and recovered their equipment, Kei said, "I dearly hope we never need to do that again. Furthermore, any retreat through the flooded section will be dramatically slowed. In the worst case that we provoke an amphibian monster and need to make a swift escape, it may trivially close any distance with us as we haplessly flounder through the underwater passage. Let us ensure that this area is well-trapped so as to slow potential pursuers."
Akane nodded and started setting Lesser Barrier seals. Unfortunately, Kei was right. In their underwater scramble, Hazō (and everyone) had found that chakra adhesion was nearly impossible in the new depths of the cave.
Candoru came up by Hazō's side and gave him a baleful gaze. The dog then shook his head and body violently, spraying Hazō's dry clothing with water. Candoru walked off smugly, and Zinnia giggled and took Hazō's hand.
"Now you want to hold my hand?" Hazō asked with a smile. "Right when I smell like wet dog?"
Zinnia smiled back. "You smell like wet dog more than you think. If you wanted to avoid it, you'd bathe more after your Seventh Path visits."
Hazō groaned and she gave him a kiss on the cheek.
-o-
Hazō took back all his misgivings. They had been right to press onwards.
The winding path out of the flooded section opened into another large cavern, this one even lusher with greenery. Mosses covered the walls, plants and ferns grew around scattered pools and streams on the ground, and vines hung in thick patches, reducing visibility more than the faint mist in the air from the various trickling water sources. A few beasts had thrown themselves at the team, but they'd been quickly slaughtered.
But the samples of the various plants and animals paled in comparison to the real find of the night – the massive crystal near the center of the room.
It looked like it had exploded from the ground, narrower at the base and spreading wider in long, clean lines until about chest height, where the straight shards ended in pointed hexagonal segments. Some of the longest shards were taller than Hazō's head.
Initially, he'd thought of money. He'd absorbed a bit about gemstones from Mari over the years. He could see the clean blue and green colors of the crystal, occasionally streaked through with purple and hints of red. The crystal was incredibly clear – no shard showed any inclusion or warping. The crystals clearly held a hexagonal shape well, and of course, there were thousands of pounds of it.
With access to the Seventh Path trade network, and with trade routes opened up by AMITY… as long as the gem didn't turn out to be something cheap like quartz, the clan would be rich beyond measure. Hazō could take on the most ambitious Uplift projects he could imagine and the coffers would barely be dented. He could actually buy small countries.
Then, he'd noticed something and asked everyone to extinguish their Daybright seals again. The walls still had faint blue streaks, but that light was almost completely drowned out by a brilliant light from within the crystal. It too had a gentle wax and wane to it that mirrored the streaks on the wall, but when they broke off a chunk of crystal (Hazō never cared much for money in its own right, but holding a ten-pound crystal-clear gemstone easily worth ten million ryo alone gave him a strange rush), the separated chunk continued to glow of its own power. The fluctuations of its light sped up initially, but eventually stabilized into a calm, even blue shine.
There was some powerful latent chakra within the crystal, and it was stable. Even with all of his ideas about uses for chakra metal, he couldn't begin to imagine what a chakra gemstone might do.
"Let's grab a few more pieces before we get out of here," Hazō said to the group. Kei was currently weighing the gemstone chunk that Yuno had cut away, and she seemed similarly bedazzled, if slightly disturbed. They'd taken their safety precautions, letting Zinnia carefully approach the crystal, touch it, stand close to it for a while, and asking Candoru do the same. They'd even tested for mind altering effects, checking that Zinnia could easily step away from the crystal and that she felt no different about it. Nothing suggested any danger, and they had eventually decided that small interactions like this were acceptable.
Yuno hefted Satsuko, but before she could swing, Akane spoke. "We should pick carefully. Try to get some of the different colors, maybe grab a piece from the bottom and from the top. Hazō, while we wait, could you use MEW to seal off the further tunnels?"
"Right," Hazō said, "let's not get interrupted. We can take them down if we ever want to go further."
He looked at the trio of tunnel exits further into the caverns and realized they were close enough that he could seal them all with a single Earthshaping technique.
"Zinnia, Candoru, could you cover me? I'll use Earthshaping to seal them all at once and save some chakra, but it'll take some extra time."
The two of them stood beside him as Hazō settled down to meditate. He formed the handseals. "Earth Release: Earthshaping." He pressed his palms to the ground.
A simple job like this, just making a crude wall to fill a passageway, would only be the work of a couple minutes. He wouldn't need any precision to do it. A couple minutes to seep his chakra into the ground, a couple minutes to block the tunnels, and a couple minutes to take his chakra back out.
Yet, for some reason, the technique wouldn't start. When he pushed his chakra into the ground, it refused to take root. He closed his eyes, letting the tension seep away. He thought back to his early days learning the Earthshaping technique and marshaled his chakra through his breathing, waiting until it was calm and steady. He slowly started to work it into the ground. There was more resistance than normal, but he pushed gently but insistently, until his chakra finally spread out and saturated the ground. He focused his willpower, not to words, but to a raw idea.
You are the heart of the world, formed into this shape by happenstance. But there are other forms you could have taken.
Yet, as he spread his chakra out, the earth did not become malleable. He did not feel the nature and strength of that earth reaching back to touch his chakra and resist his will. It did not speak to him at all.
He spread his chakra deeper into the stone.
You were once united, and you will be united again. Draw together now, and rejoin with your kin.
But the stone refused.
I am not a part of the world you know, and you are not my master.
There were no words, just a forced insistence that Hazō could not warp the stone. And, little by little, the alarms started to ring in Hazō's mind.
When Hazō had learned Earthshaping, he had contrasted Earthshaping's fine and gentle manipulation with the crudeness of chakra adhesion. Kei stepped beside him, not recognizing his focus, and he remembered Mist's Academy instructors teaching him about chakra adhesion. About how chakra-bearing creatures resisted adhesion, which was why you could easily walk on walls, but walking on trees was harder, and it was impossible to use chakra adhesion to rip the flesh off of people while taijutsu-sparring.
I am not a part of the world you know, and you are not my master.
When they'd descended, the creatures within had acted like ordinary chakra beasts at first. They'd attacked the team, but fled when the tide turned against them. But once they'd passed a certain point, the beasts had stopped retreating. The cavefish had thrown themselves against the team at the cost of their lives, and the creatures in this cavern made their best attempts too, no matter how futile it was.
I am not a part of the world you know, and you are not my master.
Hazō had noted the streaks of blue in the walls and the gentle flux of their light. Suddenly, a connection clicked in his mind, and he saw the streaks as vessels, carrying something other than blood with the wax and wane of its light as a pulse. And if the streaks throughout the entire cave system were the vessels, then this crystal had to be the heart.
I am not a part of the world you know, and you are not my master!
Hazō felt the Earthshaping connection suddenly snap and he rose to his feet clutching his head as his chakra rebounded on him. His vision swam for a moment, and by the time he got his bearings, he saw the rest of the team in combat stances, swiveling their heads as the cavern shook around them. Somehow, Hazō knew to look to the walls, where the stone warped and twisted, protruding a humanoid shape from the cavern wall. He raised an arm to point, but before he could speak, the figure was fully extruded and fell to the ground.
It rose in an instant, far, far faster than any being made of stone should have been able to. The eight foot tall figure was a crude caricature of the human form, well beyond the human limits of musculature. The entirety of its surface, its skin, was covered in streaks of blue against the greyish stone of the cavern, and its pulse was fast now, matching the accelerated pulse of the crystal heart in the center of the room. The figure held out its hands and vines and roots jumped towards it. They twisted and coiled in loops around the figure's arms and body, covering its body in patches of moss and leaves.
Hazō wasn't sure whether it was residual chakra in the ground from the Earthshaping or just a quirk of where he was standing, but he felt a rumbling around him, and looked up to see a column of stone descending from the ceiling to cut him off from the crystal.
Then Hazō heard Yuno shift her feet and turned to see a second stone figure blocking the way they came from.
A/N: Your plan must include which side Hazō wants to jump to. On the side you came from are Akane and Yuno, on the side going deeper are Kei, Zinnia, and Candoru.
All the combats in this update were rolled, but I wrote a lot and obfuscating rolls is more work. If there's interest, I'll edit them in later (but no promises, there were a lot of rolls) (EDIT: I did! See after the bullet points.).
Cannai thinks Cantelope will recover, but you haven't heard him speak yet. If he does recover his faculties of speech at some point, he may want to speak with you.
Most of what you retrieved is safely stored on the Seventh Path. The Orochimaru items are ready for 7P transport near the mouth of the caverns.
Bookkeeping:
Current CP | FP net
Hazō: 133 | +2
Kei: 261 | -1
Akane: 142 | +2
Zinnia: 21
Candoru: 105
Yuno: Probably quite high
Hazō currently has a full stress track as a result of Earthshaping breaking. He still has PCJ active.
Kei and Hazō are no longer rusty for combat.
More rolls with more extreme results the deeper in they go and the longer they explore.
Encounter rolls:
#1: Day 1, Moderate quantity, moderate strength
#2: Day 2, High quantity, moderate strength
#3: Day 3, Moderate quantity, high strength
#4: Day 3, Low quantity, ultralethal strength
Treasure rolls:
Day 2: Good
Day 3: Minor
Day 3: Legendary
Day 3: Rare
Combat prep – Hazou can sustain Cantelope for around 4 hours, after which he is dry on chakra. Assuming Kei Snowflakes up at T-20 hours and Akane SCs at T-8 hours, that gives them:
Hazou: 138 CP going into the cave
Cantelope: 162 CP
Kei: 2x Snowflakes, 264 CP (Snowflakes at 33 CP each)
Akane: 2x SCs, 138 CP (Akane SCs at 40 CP each)
One SC is Bait™, the other SC is Hazou-Sitter 9000 (maintaining a bodyguard Block to swap Hazou out of danger in the event of an ambush).
Yuno: Full, no prep needed
Alternately, Candoru offers 8 hours:
Hazou: 195
Kei: 234
Akane: 94
—
Encounter #1
A group of beasts try to psychically dominate, then consume the party. As they are insectoid, they have the Aspect "Fragile Physiology"', which means they do not have a Severe Consequence slot. They start with a sonic/psychic attack against every member of the party:
Cantelope takes 12 mental stress. He barely avoids total personality death, and instead opts to be Taken Out, removing the Severe Consequence he would otherwise have taken. If he took one more stress, he would have been forcibly Taken Out and permanently mentally crippled.
Yuno takes 1 mental stress, and is a little irritated. Everyone else is fine.
The rest of the fight: Does not really need to be rolled, as apart from their psychic ability, they're weak. The team can easily wrap them up.
Damn Gouketsu and their high Resolve.
—
Encounter #2
The swarm of (rolls) 18 spider… salamander… spidermander-things attack! As they are insectoid, they have the Aspect "Fragile Physiology"', which means they do not have a Severe Consequence slot. This is deeper in the cave, so their stats are substantially higher.
Akane + SCs
Akane saves FA for counterattacks as needed. All three PKH up, spend a Supp grabbing new Narrow-angle blast rings, then attack the uninjured ones: (#0, #15, #16)
She gets Youthful Fist on on #0, #15.
Hazou:
PKH, attack #11 which hit Kei.*(I did the rounds out of order since Hazou's initiative is so damn low I thought he was in the next round, and only noticed the error now that I'm cleaning up the rolls. I already wrote that Hazou bailed Kei out of a nasty hit, so I'm sticking with it)
Hazou (Taijutsu): 43 + 10 (PKH) + 5 (Team Uplift) + 6 (Rocket Boots) + 3 (Macerators) + 2 (Ghost Scales) - 1 (PCJ) + 3 (dice) = 71
Beast (Mandibles): ??
Hazou deals ? stress, inflicting a Moderate.
Round 2:
Yuno:
Attack #16, which seemed strong.
Yuno (Melee Weapons): ??
Beast (Mandibles): ??
It's on its last legs.
At this point, all the beasts are critically injured and there's basically no further risk of failure as almost everyone gets to go before the beasts can attack again. The cleanup is easy, and Hydrangea, Zinnia, Kei, Snowflake, Hazou, and Yuno kill one more each. Final kill counts:
This encounter happens underwater. Hazou and Kei take a ½ penalty to all physical skills (as they grew up in Mist and very comfortable with swimming), Akane and Candoru take ⅔ penalty (as they have actually swam in the past), and Yuno takes ¾ (no real water exposure). Otherwise, ABs work as normal.
They come to a dead end and see the cavern bend downwards into the water. Hydrangea is the designated bait, so removes her seals and swims in. She gets a fair distance under the water, and finds the location where the water ends and the cave continues.
The cavefish attack her once she reaches roughly the halfway point.
Okay, there are a bunch of fish down there and they're very deadly. They quickly attack anything that comes close. There's no other good way forward, so they'll need to deal with this. Explosions are a great way of killing things underwater… Crystal volunteers, if only for the irony of getting to blow up some more fish. An explosion in Melee will certainly kill the fish.
Some waterproofing of seals allows for a clever MARS thing to be used – Crystal will roll a series of Substitution targets into the underwater passageway, marking them with explosives tied to ARS. When the fish attack her, she'll Substitute out of the way and trigger the ARS-explosive to catch as many of the killer fish as she can. The number of attacks she can dodge in a row without Substituting is the number of fish that she can bait into Melee, to be insta-killed.
For this tactic to work, her reactions need to be better than any of the fish. She'll roll an Alertness check:
Crystal (Alertness): ??
Best of fish (Alertness): ??
Excellent Athletics roll on the Sprint! She gets 2 Zones away. The rest of the fish can make a Good TN 30 Resolve check to keep it together and keep on attacking Crystal… #1 and #4 somehow pass. However, they can't reach her! They'll give chase to the target.
Crystal notes she's out of chakra, so the Substitution/ARS trick won't work again. Instead, she'll opt to trigger one last explosion in her hands to take out one more fish, and force the other to make a TN40 Athletics check for stress… #1 dies, #4 takes 3 stress, which is a Mild. Crystal dies.
After careful consideration of the possibilities, Prism volunteers to do the same.
She does not manage to get as far away, so she's caught by the remaining fish and swiftly killed.
There's now only two fish left in the cave. The team waits a bit for the fish guts to settle out of the water. With the bulk of the enemy forces taken care of, they'll proceed onward in a group, hoping to spare Zinnia any further self-sacrifice.
The fish emerge from their holes, the heroes have much better initiative. But can they actually compete against underwater predators in their home environment?
"Up!" Hazō shouted, triggering his skywalkers and running towards the ceiling, all the while thanking the Sage that he had required everyone to put them back on after coming out of the water. "Avoid plants and crystal, use fire and boom!" He shouted the words even as he sprinted towards Kei; she would need his help the most.
Those too-brief words were all there was time for. There was so much more he wanted to say—lightning was an acceptable option as well as fire and explosions, stay away from the ceiling in case more golems generated in, exercise personal judgement if circumstances invalidated his orders, on and on. There just wasn't time. The team was in two groups, Akane and Yuno over by the tunnel that led to the surface and the rest of the group closer to the exits that led deeper into the cave. A golem had formed near each group and a wall of stone was growing down from the ceiling, not quite as fast as an Earth Wall jutsu could have raised it but almost.
The wall clicked into place, dividing the room in half and trapping Hazō away from his love; the wall cut off all sound, blocking any chance of communication with Akane and Yuno. And, unfortunately, trapping both of the best combatants on the team away from everyone else. Two separate reasons to be stressed.
Zinnia, Akane's shadow clone, moved so fast her hand was a blur as she dipped an explosive disk out of her pocket, primed it, and hurled it straight at the golem. She was no ranged expert like Kei, but the Gōketsu signature weapon was less about precise aim and more about 'see that guy? fuck him and everyone near him.'
Despite Zinnia's blurring speed, the golem was faster. Its right arm twitched, the vines around it unfurling and lashing out. The tip of the vine slapped Zinnia's explosive disk out of the air and bounced it behind one of the numerous stalagmites that littered the cavern. Hazō's eyes went wide and he sprinted for cover behind one of the nearer stalagtites. The others were already moving before he shifted his weight, and managed to be in the blast shadow of various stone shields before the blast hit—although Candoru only just made it, diving behind the rocky pillar so barely ahead of the explosion that a few hairs were clipped from his tail. Thankfully, it wasn't quite enough to pop the summoned dog.
Hazō was beginning to regret his orders but the middle of battle was no time to change in mid-stream. He hurled his own blast disk, aiming it off to the golem's side where hopefully it couldn't reach with its whips.
They say that the kami laugh at the plans of mortals. The golem moved casually forward, one, two, three steps that seemed slow yet somehow it was passing behind a stalagmite at the instant of explosion and didn't even have its leaves rustled. Through bad luck or intent on the part of the cave, the blast disk took a bad bounce, putting Hazō directly in the path of the blast. He dove for cover, managing to dodge all but the edge of the shockwave, yet it was still strong enough to shatter his protective Pangolin Conditioning Jutsu.
Kei's arm went back, came forward, and the precision of ten thousand hours of practice sent an explosive-tipped kunai straight through the golem's eye—
—or would have, had the golem not casually stepped away just as she loosed. The motion was so smooth that it didn't even seem like a reaction; it was as though the monster had always been moving there, the action in progress and somehow Kei's attack was simply misaimed. That, Hazō knew, was not the case. He also knew that this was a very bad sign.
Still, the metal blade might not have hit its mark, but the Gōketsu Special attached to its hilt wanted its innings. Once again, the golem 'happened' to be in the blast shadow of a stone pillar. Once again, Hazō was just a bit too slow. His ankle stung as the explosion clipped him; it wouldn't slow him down, but it was no Sunday picnic either.
The golem flicked both arms forward and the vines around them lashed out, reaching for Kei like hungry lampreys. She fired her off-hand kunai, allowing it to spin instead of lancing with pinpoint precision. The weapon tumbled through the approaching vines, knocking them off course and tangling them momentarily together and slowing them enough that she danced casually aside, her skywalker seals making it easy to glide across air and away from danger.
"Fire Release: Flame Aura!" Zinnia cried, zipping through handseals. Flames roared from her body and she pivoted, bracing herself to lunge at the enemy.
Before she could spring forth, Candoru leaped at the golem, rising up from where he had stealthily circled behind it. His jaws gaped wide, otherworldly teeth aimed straight for his enemy's head.
The golem swung a casual backhand, a motion that would have been impossible with human joints. It split Candoru in twain and sent him back to the Seventh Path with a painful jolt. Hazō's stomach plummeted.
Kei took advantage of the monster's arm being out of position to send another kunai at it, this one aimed for the right shoulder, immediately through what would have been a human clavicle.
The golem turned slightly, shifting course with inevitable precision, and the kunai flashed by it more than a handspan away.
"Retreat!" Hazō cried. "Zinnia, tell Akane to retreat! Summoning Technique: Cantered!" He stabbed his hand on the pin that stuck down from his belt for this very purpose, then slammed the bloody flesh against the side of a stalagtite and caught the summoned puppy in his arms before it could plummet to the ground.
Zinnia's head flicked towards him, her expression startled behind the wreathing flames, and then she puffed away into smoke so that her progenitor would receive the orders.
Kei, thankfully, still bore the implicit trust in her field commander that had been built up throughout their missing-nin days. She did not question orders, nor even look to him in surprise. She merely bloodied her hand, touched the ceiling, and said "Summoning Technique: Pandā!" An instant later she was gone, tearing her way across realities to safety.
The golem cocked its head in curiosity (was it startled? did it hesitate?) and then lashed out with its vines, grappling Hazō and pulling him in to be crushed between hands made from the bones of the earth.
The vines grappled nothing but smoke as Hazō and Cantered disappeared to the Seventh Path.
The battlefield:
A stone wall is dropping from the roof, dividing the room into two zones. Each zone is about 30' high and 50' across. There are stalagmites and stalactites everywhere meaning that it's possible to dodge explosives. The players voted to have Hazō jump to Kei's side of the fight, not Akane's. Therefore, you will not know the results of the Akane/Yuno/Golem fight unless Hazō survives his own and finds a way to get through the stone wall that is separating them. As mentioned above, Akane and Yuno are near the exit that leads back to the surface while the rest of the kids are near three unexplored exits that go deeper into the cavern system.
Hazō's side of the fight: Hazō, Kei, Candoru, and Zinnia (one of Akane's shadow clones) vs golem #2.
(NB: I don't remember Candoru's stats and I can't find his sheet so I'm making something up. If it turns out to be too different from what it should be, or what it is next time, then clearly the aetheric channel connecting him to the Human Path was having an unusually (high | low)-latency day. Or something. I dunno.)
Golem #2 is the one with the plants woven around it. It definitely has the Vine Whip power and it might have the ?? power as well. 1 = no, 2 = yes: 1. It does not have the second power.
I'm waffling on whether to treat the Vine Whip ability more like Water Whip or more like Pangolin's Reach. In the first case it's a Range:0 attack that uses the golem's primary attack stat. In the second case, it's a jutsu that pulls people in and keeps them from escaping so that the golem can beat their faces in with taijutsu. In the interest of being nice and not having everyone die, let's go with the second option. Also, on the zeroth round the golem didn't actually want to fight so it won't counter-attack, only dodge. On the first round it's pissed and will be fighting full force and with lethal intent.
We'll say that the Vine Whip works like this: The golem lashes out with its vines, grabbing one of his opponents and pulling them in close. The vines have range:0, meaning they can attack anyone in the zone. If they catch you then: (1) you take 1 stress, (2) you are pulled into Melee with the golem, and (3) a Block is established against you leaving Melee. You can either dodge them or counter them with Melee Weapons. Taijutsu and Ranged Weapons cannot be used as a defense.
The golems are threatening, not attacking, so the team gets to act before the fight starts. Hazō tells them to skywalk up and then rain down explosions.
FP and Aspects:
Y'all did not buy FP before the fight started, so Zinnia has 0 (she's a shadow clone), Candoru has 1d4 = 1, Kei has 3, and Hazō has a whopping 8. (I don't remember if we've been saying that summons are supposed to have FP, so let's roll with it.)
What combat-useful Aspects does everyone have?
Candoru: Badass Beast
Kei: Team Uplift
Akane (and therefore her clones): YOUTHFUL Taijutsu Star, Equals at Last, Team Uplift
Hazō: (Formerly) Marked for Death, Team Uplift.
Note: Hazō does not get to use 'Lists and Plans' as an Aspect in this fight because it requires that he be following a plan that was made in advance: "Invoke when: Hazō and his allies are moving in accordance with a plan Hazō has made in advance."
Zinnia is a shadow clone and really shouldn't have any seals since seals don't duplicate when the clone is formed, but we'll assume that she was handed a loadout.
Round 0:
Zinnia throws Weapons:4 explosives. Everyone in the zone must dodge a TN 40 attack. If they fail then they take stress based on the roll, up to a maximum of 4.
The golem slaps the explosive aside and behind a stalagmite, allowing everyone to evade damage without much effort, except for Candoru who just barely makes it and gets a few hairs clipped off his tail in the blast. (But not enough to pop him.)
Everyone dodges except Hazō, but his Pangolin Conditioning Jutsu sacrifices itself to save him.
Kei throws an explosive-equipped kunai. Her Ranged Weapons is 40, which is the same as the dodge TN for a Weapons:4 explosive, but with chakra boost she can spend 25 chakra to add 5 to her roll, meaning that she's attacking at 45 and Weapons:4. (The explosive overrides the kunai's Weapon:1.)
The golem targets (1d4 (C,H,K,Z): 3) Kei and uses Vine Whip, attempting to pull her in close. Kei has already used her only combat-relevant Aspect so she cannot invoke.
Zinnia: Activates Flame Aura.
I'm not sure how much chakra she has but it's not going to be a lot, especially since there was already some fighting in the hallways. I'll say she's got enough for the Flame Aura and one round of maximum boost.
Candoru: ?? (Teeth) + 3 (dice) = ?? (He used up his Fate Point earlier)
Golem, taijutsu: ?? + 6 (dice) = ??
Candoru is popped!
Kei, Ranged Weapons, no explosives because she doesn't want to hurt Hazō again: 40 + 5 (chakra boost) - 3 (dice) = 42. (She already used her only invokable Aspect)
Golem, dodge: ?? + 3 = ??.
Golem dodges.
Hazō: Calls the retreat, summons one of the puppies but does not depart yet.
The golem uses Vine Whip, attempting to pull someone in close. Candoru is popped and Zinnia is on fire, so he's targeting either Kei or Hazō. 1d2 (H,K): 2 = Kei. Kei has already used her only combat-relevant Aspect so she cannot invoke.
Once again, Kei is fortunate that the golem is not as good with its vines as with its fists. She twists aside once more.
In accordance with Hazō's orders, Zinnia pops herself to pass the instructions to Akane, Kei summons a pangolin and returns to the Seventh Path. Hazō waits until she is safe and then likewise retreats, praying that his orders are enough to keep Yuno and Akane alive.
Hazō stumbled slightly as he stepped down on the uneven grass of the Seventh Path, and the sensation of vines wrapping around his shoulders quickly faded. He let Cantered down out of his arms.
"Is this a tactic?" Kei asked. She had drawn a new set of tagged kunai and was holding them loosely in her off-fingers while she made the seal of return.
Hazō shook his head. "No, we were outmatched. We have to trust that Akane and Yuno can make it out on their own."
Kei pulled her hands apart and straightened up, but Hazō could tell she hadn't relaxed. "So be it. Regardless of how their capabilities measure against beasts of that caliber, we have very few points of leverage to influence their outcome any longer. I suppose you intend for us to recuperate and return as soon as possible?"
Hazō nodded. It was near nightfall on the Seventh Path, but without any sun to set, the shadows in the patches of tall grasses around the plains only grew darker rather than longer. Cantered had plopped down a few feet away with his ears pinned back in anxiety, and Pandā, standing near Kei, drummed away on his armored belly with his claws in a familiar nervous tattoo. Nearby, Cando and one of the giant pangolins started to make their way over to their wards. Impressively, the grizzled old mutt didn't even seem scared by the pangolin nearly ten times his height.
Kei took a step closer to him. "Hazō, you were injured?"
Hazō looked down to his profusely bleeding ankle where the explosion had torn away his clothing and swore. He quickly knelt down to start binding it. "Sorry, didn't feel the pain in the heat of the battle. It's fine. Not serious." He moved his foot and winced in pain. "It's painful but I still have full range of motion. There's still crutches in one of my storage seals. I'll stay off it for a day and I'll be better."
Kei nodded. "Regrettable. It will not be long before I have recovered my reserves, perhaps eight hours. Nonetheless, by that time, Akane and Yuno's fate will almost certainly have been determined. It would be best to wait for you to fully recover."
Hazō finished tending to his ankle, then tested it. It was painful but ultimately manageable. He hoped that Kei didn't realize that it was her own weapon that caused the injury.
"Kei, will Pantomaimu let you summon him to fight in the cave?"
She shook her head. "Improbable. He elected to exercise his natural showmanship in Isan out of respect for Ui's memory. Supposing the contract has not already lapsed, I anticipate he has no similar respect for myself as a summoner. That is doubled by the narrow margins of that mission's success, none of which was particularly due to my own meager efforts. He is unlikely to forfeit his hard-won retirement in the Pangolin armies for a single upstart summoner."
Hazō grimaced. "Well, will Pankurashun be available?"
Kei nodded. "He will be. Given the narrow quarters of the cavernous environments, his merely Zabuza-sized stature will be advantageous. Few of my other contracted summons would have been able to readily maneuver in such tight conditions."
"Good. Then I'll need to speak with Cannai to arrange a combat summon of my own."
o-o-o
"Summoner."
"Hello, Cannai."
Hazō stood across from the Alpha, who had arrived in his usual, nearly imperceptible way at some time in the night. Hazō and Kei had gone over their observations of the brief fight against the golem creature in the cave, but hadn't turned up anything of value. As it was conditional on Hazō's contract negotiation, prospective battle planning had been put on hold too.
Cannai very visibly let his eyes drop to Hazō's injured ankle. He met Hazō's gaze. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"As you know, I've been exploring a very distant land."
"Oh, I am aware, Summoner," Cannai said, lying down in the darkened grass of the nighttime. "I recall how you sent Cantelope back to me. He is starting to recover. While he has not spoken yet, he has started to take food and water more easily, and I am told that earlier today, he managed to relieve himself on his own."
"Cannai, I didn't expect anything like that to happen to him. I-"
"I am aware you did not intentionally lead Cantelope into danger, Summoner. Likewise, recall that I was present when you formed your contract with him, and given what I know of your world, I had expected that exotic locations would carry some inherent dangers. I regret that this happened, and were Cantelope to have been permanently injured, I anticipate I would have been angry, rational or not. However, as it is, I do not blame you. You were adequately cautious and took all reasonable precautions. You are not at fault."
Hazō swallowed. "Understood. Thank you, Cannai."
"You don't need to thank me, Summoner. This isn't any mercy from me. It is the plain truth. Regardless, I believe you were going to tell me about whatever dramatic quandary you wandered into that led to yourself and the Pangolin Summoner making an extradimensional retreat into my lands?"
Hazō nodded and explained what had happened in the Caverns of Mild Peril. Cannai found the name amusing but sobered up by the end of the exposition.
"That golem creature seems quite dangerous. By your description of its fighting tactics, it was truly joined with its environment. Despite its actions seeming lazy and casual, your attempted attacks always seemed narrowly foiled by mere luck, yet somehow in the worst way possible. That... that is dangerous."
"Agreed. We have no clue how we could kill one," Hazō said grimly. Worse, when he and Kei had discussed it, they had agreed on one thing — that it still couldn't have been even comparable to the chakra golems that Itachi had described.
"So, you wish me to select a Dog Clan warrior who may be amenable to forming a contract with you, as well as recommend that they assist you?"
"That's my goal, yes. We want to return to the Human Path as soon as possible."
Cannai inclined his head to think. "Canain, the warrior that is now leading Candoru's patrolling pack, may be suitable. Candoru would most likely have been regaling him with tales of his prowess on the Human Path, though I understand they are grossly exaggerated. As before, I would gladly help you cross Dog to meet Canain, for you would never make the journey on foot in time. Yet, if I were to take you now, it would be daybreak by the time we arrived, and there would be scant hours before nightfall once we returned here, assuming you wish to coordinate your return with the Pangolin Summoner. Perhaps you would rather sleep first?"
Hazō shook his head. "I can't delay. My teammates are still there on the Human Path, and we need to get back there as soon as possible. If they need help and they've somehow managed to shelter with seals or something, we need to break them out."
Cannai looked at him for a moment, then raised himself up to all fours and shook his head and body lightly. "Very well, Summoner. Hold on tight. I will attempt to make this quick for your packmates."
o-o-o
Canain, a brown-coated mastiff whose head actually rose a few inches above Hazō's own, eyed the young summoner skeptically.
"So, you are the master of those... rockworms that caused Candoru here so much difficulty."
Hazō glanced at Candoru, who was seated with his head down nearby. "Well, I wouldn't say 'master'. They were just living in that mine. Though I guess I did own the land..."
Canain looked over at Candoru. "So, would you say that you were the one commanding them to attack Candoru from behind and underneath?"
Hazō paused, before deciding to be honest. "No, sir."
Canain huffed at Candoru, and Candoru looked away. "Fascinating. It appears there are many features of the Human Path that I still have yet to learn. Now tell me, is it really true that there is such a thing as 'horrorfish', which live in lakes and eat those that try to walk atop them?"
Hazō nodded. "Yep, they exist. They can kill you if you've never seen them before, but their charge is pretty easy to predict if you know what to look for, and they're extremely vulnerable once they've leapt out of the water."
Canain looked at Candoru once more. "Perhaps I had dirt in my ears. Once I clean them out thoroughly, Candoru, I would like to hear your combat report from the Human Path again. In full."
Canain sighed and faced Hazō. "Let us set that aside for now. I've heard the basic details from Cannai. However, I am not particularly inclined to provide aid. In truth, I was once contracted to the previous summoner, but only near the end of his time with us. He summoned me only twice, and both times were quite brief. Each was countable in seconds, and I mainly fought other humans who threatened the summoner. These brief and violent excursions did not leave me with a particularly good impression.
"Then, Candoru tells me that another dog has already been severely mentally damaged by something within these caverns you are exploring, which means a contract could actually stand to harm me permanently. Worse still, the opponent you intend for me is made fully of stone, meaning my skill with my teeth and claws will be nearly useless and I will need to use my ninjutsu instead."
"With respect, Canain, it was Cannai's decision to suggest you to me. I won't deny that this might be another violent and brief excursion, or that there's potential risk to you, though I'll note that the golem we were fighting didn't do anything but try to physically hurt us. If I may ask, what ninjutsu do you use?"
"Plant Release and Crystal Release," Canain said.
Hazō's eyebrows rose. "I... can see why Cannai recommended you, sir."
Canain huffed lightly. "Regardless, there's another point of concern for me. Where the previous summoner was a human at the peak of his power, I'm told you are barely even an adolescent by your species' standards. Without the power and resources of a masterful summoner, I doubt you will have anything to offer me for the trouble."
Hazō smiled. "Well, the trouble is minimal. I won't be calling on you more than once, and it will be at a time you can predict. There's almost no risk to you, and you don't even need to expend your own chakra since the summoning provides it for you. As for resources, I'm sure we can find a fair compensation. Tell me, have you heard yet about the Seventh Path Trade network?"
o-o-o
"Got all your seals ready?" Hazō asked.
Kei nodded, lips tight. She'd abandoned her usual frustration at Hazō's pre-battle checklists in the face of a life-or-death fight. An array of summons were scattered around them. Pandā was somehow more anxious as a result of all the preparation, while Cannai seemed to find it somewhat amusing.
"On three, we pop back, immediately summon, and try to kill the golem. If we can, we break through the wall and escape. If we notice anything off that suggests that Akane and Yuno fled in a different direction and that they're now hiding in an Earth Dome or a Five Seal Barrier shelter somewhere, we note the location but focus on securing our normal line of escape. Once we've confirmed we have a safe exfiltration route, we double back and retrieve them, rather than prematurely exploring a new or dangerous region. All good?"
Kei nodded again and held up the belts of directional explosives looped over her shoulder. They'd had the time to prepare long MARS chains of the shaped charges, so hopefully they would be able to fix the belts to the wall and trigger the MARS to activate all the seals at once and blast open a hole to the other side.
"In that case, let's get going. Pangolin Clan Technique: Pantokrator's Hammer!"
The rush of energy hit him, and Kei followed suit a moment later. They'd both cut themselves before recasting the Pangolin Conditioning Jutsu for armor, and the blood hadn't yet fully dried. Hazō and Kei both swabbed a finger into the wound to get blood to summon with, then made the seal of return.
Hazō crossed the border between worlds, surrendering himself to the strange feeling of being stretched apart and smashed flat by an incomprehensible acceleration. The sensation was always brief and quickly faded, and Hazō focused on the plan. Summon Canain and Pankurashun immediately, clear the way for Kei to Goo Bomb the golem in place so that the summons could tear it apart, then break the wall open and escape as quickly as they could.
Hazō knew that plans rarely went as intended. He knew that something would inevitably go wrong and that he'd have to adjust. He wasn't expecting for the reverse summoning itself to malfunction.
Hazō felt a sudden searing pain across his entire body, as if burning in a fire without any of the heat. A massive pressure quickly rose in his head, threatening to crush his skull and pop his eyeballs, and if he could have screamed in the space between worlds, he would have.
A moment later, he tumbled out of the side of a cavern wall. Years of training let him reach a hand back to the wall to reorient himself, and he activated his skywalkers to land silently in a low crouch inches from the ground. He heard a strange, high-pitched grinding sound, then turned as Kei's reverse summoning shoved her out of the cavern's stone barely a foot away from where he'd returned. She got her bearings faster than Hazō had and raised her hand to summon Pankurashun, but barely stopped herself at Hazō's gesture.
Somehow, they had come out at a different location than they had reverse summoned from. Worse, as Hazō looked around, he realized the team had never explored this area. They were in a completely new and unexplored stretch of cave.
Gone was the lush room with the giant crystal at its center. Instead, they had arrived in a narrow, nearly vertical stretch of cave that had a stream running down it like a waterfall. Below, Hazō could hear the waterfall emptying into a pond of some sort. There were no signs of chakra beasts or stone golems anywhere, but Hazō could hear the sound of creatures shifting somewhere in the caverns in response to the noise of their reverse summoning. His eyes widened as he made the connection. They had returned to the Human Path at the right location, but there had been stone in the way.
The cavern had changed.
Canain costs 266 CP to summon. He has agreed to be summoned only once, and sometime in the next couple hours. In exchange, he wants some trade goods from the Trade Network at some later date, once you have access to Leaf at large.
Kei cut a glance at him, then went back to surveying their surroundings. "I recognize your comment as an attempt at humor. It needs work."
"Yeah." He continued searching for anything familiar, hoping against hope that this was a reshaped version of the crystal's chamber. Perhaps there would be some scrap of texture or coloration that would seem familiar and allow him to orient himself.
Nope.
Double extra nope with a popped 'p' and a serving of nuh uh on the side.
"I've got nothing," he said at last, keeping his voice low. "No trace of threats but also nothing familiar to orient on. You?"
She shook her head, her hands tightening on the hilts of her kunai.
Hazō fumbled in his seals until he found his calligraphy materials, then carefully marked the wall where Kei had emerged, doing his best to note the exact location and angle whence she had arrived.
"You are hoping to use my emergence point as a navigation aid back to the crystal chamber?" Kei asked.
"Yup," Hazō said. "I don't know where Takahashi put it in your training, but from Tsunade-sensei it was lesson 594: 'if the arrival point is blocked then the Summoner will be ejected to the closest available space.' This mark gives us something vaguely like a starting point for locating where we came from."
"Takahashi-sensei did not—drop!"
Reflexes acted before his thoughts could ask questions; he deactivated his skywalker seals and dropped, kicking off the wall to give himself an outward vector that would hopefully make him harder to hit and would also make it easier to roll out of the impact. He hit, rolled twice, and came back to his feet in a combat crouch, turning to localize the threat. Kei joined him a second later, but she was looking at him and not at the surroundings.
"Take your skywalkers off," she ordered, doing the same herself.
Hazō obeyed, still without asking questions. In a combat situation, you obeyed the person who clearly knew more than you did. (Certain segments of Leaf's intelligentsia encapsulated this wisdom in the phrase a running sealmaster outranks the Hokage. In a testament to Leaf's enlightened and progressive nature, no one had ever been executed for uttering those words.)
Hazō's left pair of skywalkers had started to char. It was only one of the elements and the damage had not spread far enough to affect any part of the seal proper, but there had clearly only been seconds before failure.
Kei turned her own inserts towards him, a grim expression on her face. Hers were also charred, although less severely than his.
Hazō's jaw worked in frustration. He nodded thanks, then pulled out one of Kagome-sensei's chakrascope seals.
Which burst into flames and exploded the moment he activated it.
Hazō rubbed his eyebrow in frustration.
"I believe those seals have been shown to be unusually sensitive...?" Kei asked hopefully.
"If this is what I think it is, the seals are being overloaded and their channels are rupturing," Hazō said, answering her actual question. "If that happened to the skywalkers, the results would be extremely bad. The very best case would be a truly impressive explosion."
"When you say 'truly impressive', how many KSCs are we discussing?"
"Five, maybe six."
Keiko sucked in her breath. The 'Kagome Skipping Chocolate' scale measured the strength of an explosion by comparing Kagome-sensei's desire to see it against his desire to have hot chocolate with hot pepper oil. The scale was something of a joke, since few explosions were sufficient to make Kagome-sensei skip one mug of hot chocolate.
"In good news," Kei said, rummaging through her pouches, "the effect appears to be limited to seals that are in use. My storage seals show no sign of being affected. Presumably the skywalkers, being in a state of continuous activation, were more vulnerable. So long as we minimize the number of times we activate our storage seals, I suspect they are unlikely to sustain harm."
"Small favors." He looked up at where they had come from; their point of emergence was thirty feet up a sheer wall that curved slightly out into the room.
"Regarding your earlier comment about Summoners being relocated when their arrival point is blocked," Kei said, "Takahashi-sensei did not know the maximum range that a Summoner could be displaced. Nor was he certain what would happen if there were no safe location within that range."
"Tsunade-sensei didn't either," Hazō said. "Which isn't too surprising. There haven't been that many Summoners in history and they tend to be careful about their arrival points. It's not like you can do experiments on it. Not safely, anyway."
"Researchers get so hung up on that," Kei grumbled quietly.
Hazō chose to ignore the fact that he now had to worry about his sister becoming the next Orochimaru. Thank you, brain, for giving him that thought.
"Time to execute," Hazō said. "Go drop the sitrep off with Noburi, then pop back here. Give him the envelope. Tell him we want check-in attempts every two hours. Tell him that he's got basically unlimited chakra available on the Human Path and Gaku is running things, so he's not allowed to bitch about the cost or the time involved. Don't waste time chatting; I want you back here as quickly as possible."
"Given that you are giving him the authorization envelope, I suspect his answer will be quite rude," Kei said drily. Despite the snark, she summoned a junior pangolin and vanished back to the Seventh Path, returning less than two minutes later. It had been just long enough to leave Hazō feeling very, very alone, here in the dark with immeasurable amounts of stone pressing in on him.
"I was correct," she said. "I gave him the message and then gave him the envelope containing your transfer of Clan Head power to him. He read the document and then said, quote, tell Mr MEW that he works for me now, so I'll worry about any damn thing I want and that he needs to get his ass back here before I have to suck all of Leaf's ninja dry watching for him, unquote."
"It's a temporary transfer," Hazō grumbled. "Only until I get back."
"I wish to express my desire that the transfer be as short-lived as possible," Kei said. "Also, that we stop standing around."
"Yeah, yeah." Hazō started to set forth and then paused. A small smile crept onto his face. "Does this remind you of anything?"
Kei raised an eyebrow. "Your referent is unclear."
"This," Hazō said, offering a general wave that encompassed the caves and their current situation. "It's like being a missing-nin again. Only one problem to deal with: survival. No politics, no paperwork, no concern about educating and feeding hundreds of civilians and dozens of ninja. Just survive. Simple. Clean."
She stared at him for a moment and then snorted her amusement. "Indeed. There are people that I wish to return to and, more importantly in some cases, books that I wish to return to. Despite that, I am forced to admit that the current situation does provide me with a sense of focus that is, in a strange way, both relaxing and quite pleasant."
"We are seriously fucked up, aren't we?" Hazō said, struggling not to laugh. He didn't bother waiting for a response before saying, "Okay, let's do this. Up to the water's inflow, exit protocol, stealth."
Kei didn't respond; this was a stealth exit, meaning it would be done silently instead of violently. Even if talking had been appropriate, there would have been none. Years of fighting shoulder-to-shoulder meant that there was no need to discuss tactics—Hazō took point, Kei rode drag, both had their weapons ready and their eyes up. Both knew that escape was to be prioritized over combat but that if combat became necessary then it would be in the Gōketsu mode: brutal, unrestrained, and very short. Either person could start combat on their own recognizance because in such situations there was no time to waste on passing information.
They started off trending upwards, following the flow of the water. (Which, yes, was water. Hazō had checked, for fear that it might be the secretion of some cave monster. If it was then it was a secretion that looked, felt, smelled, and tasted precisely like cold, clear, and incredibly pure water.)
It was hard. Much harder than it should have been. The path was barely short of vertical and the stone of the cavern absolutely rejected all attempts at chakra adhesion. Hazō had to face the fact that he hadn't climbed a tree the normal way since he was six, and had never actually climbed rock a single time without using chakra adhesion. Ninja training simply didn't waste time on such silliness.
Granted, the first part was easy. They used a ladder from one of Hazō's storage seals to skip the first twelve feet of the climb. ("No, Hazō, I am not going to ask why you have a fifteen-foot ladder in your seals. I am fully cognizant of the fact that your answer would be 'because there are some things I would not touch with a ten-foot ladder.'") From there it was a grueling job, pulling themselves up one handhold at a time until they reached the point where the waterfall flowed into the chamber.
The channel was three feet high and wider than the flow of water, meaning it was possible to straddle across the water and not be swept away or drenched.
Hold, Hazō gestured. He crept ahead, wishing that he dared risk a Jiraiya's Awesome Daybright Seal. Instead, he made do with the faint bluish light from the veins of chakra in the walls.
Forty seconds later, he was back at the mouth of the passage where a combat-calm Kei awaited him. She was cutting up a rope, for some reason.
No passage, Hazō signed. Roof... He made a pinching gesture, fingers closing vertically. Alternative path known?
Kei nodded and pointed.
Hazō followed her finger, looking out across the cavern to the wall from which they had originally emerged. Far up on that wall, tucked back where it wouldn't have been visible from below, was a crack in the stone. A crack that was big enough to allow the passage of a human on all fours.
Fuck.
Hazō looked at the wall that led up to the crack and thought back to what he had seen before. That wall overhung and was...well, 'smooth as glass' would have been unfair, but given how hard this wall had been to climb, that one was beyond his ability and he knew it.
Too many guards, he signed. The ninja hand-talk he was familiar with didn't actually have a sign for 'the terrain is impassable'.
Kei gestured towards the ceiling.
Hazō looked up, frowning in confusion, and then realized what she was suggesting.
Hell to the fucking fuck no.
Negative, he signed emphatically. Negative. Mission not doable.
She held up a finger in a 'hold on' gesture, then offered him one of the rope fragments she had been making. It was about two feet long, with a loop on one end and a series of progressively larger knots on the other. Hazō accepted it blankly and looked at her in confusion.
She stepped up onto the wall, smearing her toes into tiny crevices that were just barely enough to support her, and stretched up to touch the ceiling. Stalactites hung down and, here and there between them, cracks ran through the stone. She took one of her rope segments and shoved the knotted end into the crack, wedging it in tightly and then lowering her body weight onto it until she hung, one handed, staring at him expectantly.
Fuuuuck.
Hazō took a deep breath, let it out slowly, and nodded. I lead, he signed. He held out his hand for the ropes.
Wordlessly, she handed over a half dozen more, plus a longer section and a knife. The two of them settled down, legs braced to hold them out of the water that ran across the stone below them, and cut the rope into improvised prototype climbing tools with which neither of them had any training or experience. All so that they could crawl, upside-down, across a fifty-foot drop onto stone, with no chakra adhesion to keep them from falling and skywalkers that might destroy the entire cavern if used.
o-o-o-o
Hazō could feel his arms screaming on the edge of collapse. He spun chakra through them, wiping away as much of the exhaustion as he could manage, but the muscles were too fatigued for that to be effective. He forced his left hand to support him just a little longer, long enough that he could fold a longer loop through the loop of the handhold he had just placed and slip his head and shoulders through it. In retrospect, some kind of harness around the hips would have been better, but he could loop a knee through the previous handhold and let this one support his chest, which shifted the load to his core muscles and let him rest his arms. Kei waited patiently behind him, sitting in a loop of her own, light contact with the rope allowing her to balance.
When they started the climb, Hazō had a very brief thought that perhaps Kei could recover the ropes as the two ninja moved past them, thereby not wasting them in case they were needed in the future and also not leaving a trail. He rejected that thought instantly. If the ropes were anchored poorly enough that it was easy to recover them then they weren't safe to use, and trying it would increase Kei's chance of falling. This situation was dangerous enough as it was; he wasn't about to take any risks, or make her take any risks, that could be avoided. That was why he climbed first; he weighed more, so if the holds were going to fail then they would fail under him. Hopefully, he would be able to catch himself as long as he always kept a grip on two holds at once, but if anyone was going to plunge fifty feet to a stone floor then it needed to be him. She was his sister.
No, they would leave a trail and that was just the way it would be. As to needing to reuse the rope...they were Gōketsu. They had more rope.
They had thus far crawled, moving agonizingly slowly and carefully, across thirty feet of roof. The destination was only fifteen or twenty feet away; Hazō could probably have made it without the rest, but caution was the watchword.
His arms were no longer shaking and the loop was now cutting into his back, so he disentangled himself and draped the larger loop back around his chest. He stretched forward and groped around for a crack to put the next handhold in.
The bats are small, well camoflaged, and completely motionless while they sleep. They are also packed together enough that they look like just another rough patch of stone.
TN to notice them before putting your hand on them: 30
Hazō, Alertness (31) - 3 (circumstance modifier for being upside down, clinging to a ceiling, in bad light) - 3 (dice) = 25
Oops.
Is this colony of bats small (0-20; 2d3+3 bats), medium (21-70; 5d4+5 bats), or large (71-100, 10d4+10 bats)?
Dice: 75
Oops.
How many bats are in the colony?
Dice: 25+10 = 35 bats.
I'm not going to roll individual attacks for 35 bats. Instead, I'll treat them as a single enemy with an attack of 60 but a maximum damage dealt of 3 stress. Which is a bit irrelevant, since neither Hazō nor Kei are able to dodge right now, or even move very much, so this really boils down to 'Hazō takes 3 stress per round until he dies or Kei does something to split some of the attackers to herself'.
First round: Hazō takes 3 stress. His PCJ soaks two of it, one makes it through. He has to roll Resolve to resist the bats' sonic attack. Under the circumstances, this is a Greatly difficult thing to do, so he's got a TN of 40. I'm choosing this without looking at his sheet and don't remember his actual Resolve. *checks* Cool, he's in good shape.
TN to not convulse from the sonic attack: 40
Hazō, Resolve: 50 + 0 (dice) = 50
No problem!
Kei vs Hazō initiative order in this situation can be argued both ways, so I'll just stick with the numbers: Kei, then Hazō
Kei: activates a MARS stack that turns on Banshee Slayers for both of them, then triggers a Banshee for 1 second
Bats: *are stunned* *fall* *die*
Combat over. 1 FP gained for Hazō (surviving a fight). 2 FP gained for Kei (surviving and winning). All stress tracks have refreshed. Hazō will reactivate his PCJ the next time he has 10 minutes to meditate
There weren't a lot of chakra veins in this area. It wasn't completely pitch black, but it was the next best thing. Hazō could have prioritized staying in the light—there was a route that would have worked—but he had instead chosen to go straight across as quickly as possible. At the moment they were climbing past one of the larger stalactites; it was wet, and the water caught the miniscule amount of light in the area and made it bounce weirdly, changing the shadows even more. Ahead, the ceiling of the cave bulged down in what was not yet a stalactite but would likely grow to be one eventually. The surface was rough and should provide good holds, so Hazō groped along its rim.
And then the bat colony that Hazō had mistaken for a bulge opened scores of tiny red eyes, shrieked, and pounced on him.
Hazō recoiled; his feet slipped off the hold they had been anchored to but he managed to keep his grip on the single handhold while slashing back and forth with his other hand. The bats were small, perhaps a quarter the size of his palm, and their hides were grey and lumpy, melding perfectly with the stone on which they slept. They were blindingly fast and their claws and fangs were tiny but sharp. Within a heartbeat, Hazō was covered in bloody scratches across most of his body.
Yes, scores of bats were swarming across him. Yes, each bat was tearing tiny morsels of flesh loose with each attack. No, that was not the major threat. The shrieking of the bats was a sonic hammer, rattling his brain inside his skull so that the world spun and melted around him. His vision tunneled down, much like the first time that Shiomi-sensei had choked him out during combat training, but he clamped his left hand tight around the handhold and spun his chakra through his body faster and faster, forcing his lungs to pump harder and his heart to beat more strongly. The resulting surge of energy forced the effect away so that he could—
The world went nigh-silent around him, the shrieking of the bats suddenly only barely audible as though they had teleported half a mile away. An instant later, the shriek of a Banshee seal ripped through the cavern in a blast of sonic murder that cut off almost as soon as it began. Around him, the stunned bodies of the bats pattered to the cave floor in a rain of wet squelches.
"I apologize for breaking stealth," Kei said.
Hazō's heart was still pounding, his breath coming in gasps, but he laughed anyway as he dangled from one hand over a massive drop. "All things considered, I'll forgive you this time. Stealth sucks anyway. We're trying to hide from a cave while we're inside it—how is that supposed to work?" The real answer was that they had no way of knowing and that it had been a useful exercise. On the other hand, he was in no way going to criticize Kei for her fast thinking in saving his life. He flipped his feet up onto the rock again and hooked his toes into the small crevice they had been in before.
"I should have used the pangolin pepper macerators," Kei fretted. "In retrospect, it is obvious. I have announced our presence to the entire cave system. If we draw more enemies—"
"Relax," Hazō told her. He found a crack ahead and pushed a handhold into it, tugging to make sure it was solidly set. "You did the right thing," he said with a grunt as he pulled himself forward. "Also, I'm feeling very smug right now."
"Oh?" she asked, moving in his wake. "Allow me to prognosticate: you accidentally caused those cave bats to attack us, I dealt with the issue by using a Multiple Action Relay Seal to activate the Banshee Slayers we were both wearing and also set off a Banshee seal in order to stun our enemies. You are looking forward to me castigating you for irritating the bats, since you believe that you have an invincible comeback in the form of 'I invented the MARS seals that you used to save our lives and I was the one who thought to set it up so that either of us could protect both of us and therefore the victory in this battle is in fact mine while you merely utilized my devices. You, Kei, should in fact be grateful to me for saving our lives.' You will offer this comeback in response to my entirely justified comments and, in your mind, I will be so taken aback that I will have no choice but to stammer out an apology for doubting you, followed by an expression of gratitude."
"That is not—"
"Sadly, Hazō, you have overlooked a key element of this scenario in your gleeful and one-sided rendering of the scene."
"Have I now?" He grunted as he pulled himself past a tricky hold.
"Yes."
"I wish to stipulate—ah, finally." He swung down and dropped onto the lip of the cave opening that had been their destination, then shook out his hands. The callouses built up by fighting hand-to-hand had nothing in common with the ones built up by clinging for your life to loops of rope that dangled from the ceiling. His palms were raw and his fingers stiff.
"I wish to stipulate that I had no expectation of you castigating me or of me using such a comeback," he said, crowding to the side so that Kei could drop down beside him. "I was feeling smug about the fact that, even hanging upside down from the ceiling, my family are still the most lethal things around. That said, what was the mistake that the version of me who lives in your head made?"
Her smile was small and brief, easy to miss in the diffuse light.
"I had every intention of expressing gratitude that you invented such a useful seal."
She eeled past him, taking care not to touch, and moved to inspect the cave that would hopefully lead them back to sun and sky and friends.
"Your near death aside," Kei commented as they prepared to resume their journey, "I do not believe I have ever been so grateful for the presence of bats."
"I'd rather you not put my near death aside," Hazō said, "but go on, I'll bite. What makes you grateful for that screeching mass of flying murder rodents?"
"The fact that they chose to roost in that location strongly suggests that we have entered stable territory. I cannot see an entire colony choosing to roost in a place where they might be abruptly denied the possibility to hunt by a shifting layout, or, for that matter, crushed, impaled, sliced, ground to pieces, or transported deeper into the controlling entity's territory where it can unleash its servitors upon us for more creative forms of torture and/or death."
Hazō stared at her.
"Excuse me," Kei said. "Long hours spent climbing in the stygian darkness may have afflicted me with an excess of realism. It will surely recover to normal levels once we reach the surface."
"Well," Hazō said with a deliberate lightness, "you can be grateful for the presence of bats, I can be grateful for the absence of bats, and between us we can cover all the possibilities. Are you ready to keep going?"
Kei cast a glance at the direction they had come from. "Consider me to be bursting with enthusiasm."
-o-
Abyssal horror encounter roll 1: No encounter
Abyssal horror encounter roll 2: No encounter
In accordance with Kei's predictions (and in contradiction of her expectations), the pair reached the surface without further incident. Scattering nearby wildlife was one of the advantages of the Banshee seal, she supposed, just as drawing every patrolling ninja in the country was one of the disadvantages.
"What should be our next move?" Kei asked after a few minutes to collapse on the grass in a highly dignified fashion. "Assuming Akane and Yuno have survived, they will likely have assumed us dead—not unreasonably, considering the manner of our return to the Human Path—and chosen to abandon the mission and travel to Leaf, or perhaps attempted to retrieve our bodies. If they have been more optimistic, they could be waiting outside the cave entrance, or more sensibly at the nearby village."
"They'll have been more optimistic," Hazō said confidently. "Akane would never give up on either of us. You know that."
"A fair point," Kei admitted. "I was merely covering all possibilities, in accordance with your earlier policy. Additionally, while I do not believe Yuno actually considers me immortal, her belief in the Pangolin Summoner's lofty destiny is nearly as fanatical and unshakeable as Akane's belief in you."
Hazō had the decency to squirm a little.
"Let's hit the cave entrance first," he said. "If I go back to the village and reveal that I went into the cave and survived, it'll draw a lot of attention. If you go, you'll still draw attention as a stranger, especially if you start asking questions about other strangers that might have recently turned up out of nowhere."
Kei did not state the obvious. Akane and Yuno would have been forced to retreat while under attack by both golems, and a crystal capable of raising walls to obstruct any escape route. In all probability, she would soon be forced to raise the issue of how long they were prepared to wait.
-o-
It would, Kei reflected, have been a matter of grim irony had Hazō successfully escaped the clutches of an unstoppable chthonian abomination only to perish at the hands of his beloved. Akane had paused just long enough to confirm that he was (mostly) uninjured before launching into a tackle-hug that put Jūchi Yosamu's fastest pounce to shame. It was a mystery to Kei, who was versed in taijutsu only sufficiently to keep it well away from herself, how Akane could accomplish such a feat of affectionate violence without shattering a single bone.
She was able to endure the following public display of affection for approximately three seconds before her patience was exhausted and she took Yuno aside for a debriefing.
(Would Tenten desire tackle-hugs? Or Fujisawa, who seemed more the type? Should Kei add it to her list of long-term objectives?)
"…and then Akane attacked it again, but nothing really happened because it was made of rock. But once she had its attention, it started to turn, and I don't think it was very good at taijutsu, because it left an enormous opening here, so Satsuko and I used Lumberjack Prepares for a Long Winter like this…"
The key conclusions from Yuno's report, to the extent that Kei was able to absorb them as weariness began to set in, were that rock golems were bereft of blood, which was very disappointing, but that they made for challenging opponents, which helped compensate. Beyond that, it was useful to know that the Mountain Cleaver Style was devastating to armoured targets (and that "lesser weapons than Satsuko" were not), and that the crystal had been perfectly ready to spawn additional golems until the intruders were eliminated. Yuno admitted that she had been centimetres away from a vine grab which would have pulled her to her doom as she made her escape, while Akane had been forced to overdraw on chakra in order to use Substitution on their prepared targets. She was still nursing minor burns from the resulting detonation of her Flame Aura, but was apparently willing to ignore basic medical considerations for the sake of a hug from Hazō. (Then again, it would have been hypocritical to condemn her too strongly, considering what Kei was willing to endure on her quest to enable the same.)
"In conclusion," Kei said, "we came close enough to death to feel the Reaper's bony fingers brush against our skin, survived only through a combination of incredible luck and implausible firepower, and are now doubtless about to discuss whether we intend to repeat the experience, only with more firepower so as to need less luck. It is a pity Snowflake missed this, because it is indeed the very definition of a Gōketsu adventure."
The team was barely through the gates of Leaf, ten minutes from home and the bath and food that they all desperately needed after the long run back from Honey. They had been up at dawn and run all day, the rhythm of the road pounding in their feet, the flow of muscles and steady thump of hearts washing away the world and letting them move in a silent state of zen. The first words of the day were thus even more shocking than they otherwise would have been.
"You were wrong, Kei," Hazō said.
Kei turned to look at her brother, one eyebrow raised in incipient offense. "Oh?"
"Yes," Hazō said. He pointed with his chin. "No adventure is complete until the heroes return home and see how things have changed in their absence. This is the very definition of a Gōketsu adventure."
The target of his gesture was a troupe of players busking at the edge of the Uzumaki Square market, atop a collection of wooden pallets that served as a rude stage. The barker and one other stood on the stage proper while two others stood behind it, holding up a bedsheet between them to serve as a curtain. From this angle, Hazō could see several people kneeling behind the curtain.
"Gather, one and all!" cried the barker. "Gather, for the tale of The Mighty Jiraiya's Mighty Torch and the clan that sprang forth from it! Gather ye, gather ye!"
The barker was a boy, perhaps eleven or twelve, whose voice hadn't broken yet. He was animated, bouncing around the stage with wide gestures. Shoppers and passersby were caught up in his excitement and began to drift over.
At the back of the stage, waiting solemnly, stood 'the Mighty Jiraiya', eyes front and staring into the infinite distance as though his mind flew far beyond the mortal world. The player in question was probably the troupe's leader, a man in his thirties, but with the makeup that stage tradition used to suggest age—a dusting of flour in the hair and a few streaks of brown makeup across the forehead that sufficient imagination could perceive as wrinkles. The man's natural hair color was a mediocre brown and his hair was short, nothing like the enormous white mane that Jiraiya had cultivated. He had at least managed to find a haori that looked something like what Jiraiya wore most of the time, and he had streaked red paint across his cheeks the way Jiraiya had. A rolled-up blanket was strapped to his back, simulating the Toad Summoning Scroll. It was actually an excellent costume for a street player; many of them simply hung a sign around their necks that gave the name of their character.
'The Mighty Jiraiya' was holding a torch and holding it suggestively, one end clamped between his thighs and one hand holding it out at an angle so that he looked like he had a three-foot dong the end of which was on fire.
A sufficient crowd had gathered, so the barker commenced.
"The Mighty Jiraiya! Hero of the age! Protector of the Leaf! Imbued with the Will of Fire!"
The Mighty Jiraiya's player hopped forward, throwing a 'taijutsu' kick that would have driven Academy instructors to drink, then plucking the torch forth from its resting place and smiting an imaginary foe over the head with a loud HYYAAAA before tucking it back and waggling his hips slightly.
"For decades, The Mighty Jiraiya slew like a storm, crushing every foe that dared raise hand or eye to Leaf! The Will of Fire draped his body in power, granting him strength and virility beyond normal men!"
'Jiraiya' went into a series of furious spins and 'taijutsu' attacks. The torch shifted from place to place, being held close to the body during a spin so as to suggest a cloak of flame, smiting down on imaginary foes, and then resuming its suggestive placement.
"At last, after decades of glorious service, The Mighty Jiraiya met his true love!"
A teenage boy came running up onto the stage. He wore a linen shirt tucked into a hakama belted tight around his waist. A pair of rolled-up blankets were shoved into the shirt to simulate enormous breasts. A poor-quality wig trailed red strings down to his ankles. His face was painted white with ruby-red lips.
"The only woman fit for Leaf's hero! The Shadowed Death, the Mind Blade, the Kindly One...Lady Firehair!"
The crowd went wild as 'Mari' threw a high kick, spun, kicked over into a handspring, and then twirled into a modified Tree Pose with one hand above 'her' head and the other curved gracefully in front of her. Hazō had no idea what this was supposed to be...a taijutsu guard stance? An implication of seduction? The crowd was woo- and aiayai-ing so clearly it worked for them.
"Born to foreigners, yet still Lady Firehair burned with the Will of Fire!"
'Mari' spun in place, taking a torch from one of the stage hands and returning to her modified Tree Pose, except now her left hand held the torch in front of her. It was a few inches shorter than the one that 'Jiraiya' carried, but still looked oversized on the actor's shorter body.
"So empowered by the Will of Fire was she that she threw off the yoke of the foreign oppressors and hastened to Leaf!"
'Mari' surged, arching her back and expanding her shoulders as though throwing off a weight. She 'raced' around the tiny stage with the mincing steps of a stage performer trying to suggest distance traveled...and then she halted when her eyes met those of the ersatz Jiraiya.
'Jiraiya' had been allowing his Will of Fire to descend until it was straight out in front of him. At the sight of 'Mari' his eyes went wide. He turned his head to face the audience and dropped his jaw, then wiggled his eyebrows furiously as he raised the Will of Fire back up to a sharp angle.
"And thus the two came together!"
'Mari' and 'Jiraiya' raced towards one another, spinning around in what was actually a reasonably good series of mirrored irimi/tenkan pairs. They closed the distance, free hands tightening in each other's jackets so that they could stick together as they spun, faster and faster, the torches on opposite sides so that they were encircled in a pretended trail of fire. They spun for two seconds, then halted, 'Mari' arched backwards and 'Jiraiya bent over her.
"Lady Firehair and Lord Jiraiya fought and loved—"
Both players turned towards the audience and smiled suggestively, nodding until the audience cracked up.
"—until at last it was time to seek an heir!"
The two players moved apart and a pair of stagehands dressed in the black clothes that meant 'I am not here' stepped up behind them and raised a sheet, blocking off the view. They shook it for a moment, then dropped it to the stage.
Thus revealed was another teenage player. He was unimpressive; a weak chin, no proper musculature, a rumpled jacket, and messy hair.
"Mother, Father!" he said, his voice shrill.
"My...son!" 'Jiraiya' said, starting off uncertain and then forcing heartiness into his voice. He cheated out so as to keep the torch away from his fellow players and their probably-flammable costumes. He clapped his free hand on Son's shoulder and squeezed. Son winced and then plastered a pained smile on his face.
"Son," 'Jiraiya' said, "someday, I will be gone." He turned, looping his left arm around Son's shoulders and gesturing with the torch in his right to direct the eye to the horizon. "I will be gone and you will have to take my place."
"Of course, Father! I'm very anxious to rule the clan!"
"I'm sure you are, Son, I'm sure you are." 'Jiraiya' clapped Son on the shoulder again. "Now, it's a tremendous responsibility, running one of the Great Clans!"
"I know, Father!" Son reached towards the torch that 'Jiraiya' held in his free hand, only to miss when 'Jiraiya' gestured with it.
"All right then. Now, I am one of the greatest heroes Leaf has ever produced, so you're going to have to work hard to measure up to me."
"I know, Father!" Son piped in his barely-less-than-falsetto voice. "I will! I'll work so very hard to make you proud, Father! I'll learn ninja-ing and, um, books, and, um..."
"Don't you worry, Son," 'Jiraiya' said, patting him on the head. Son reached for Jiraiya's torch again, only to miss when 'Jiraiya' reached forward to tap 'Mari' gently on the forehead with it. "Your mother is brilliant, and skilled at everything. She is a mistress of every art a ruler could need. She will support you. With her at your side, you will have no trouble. Just listen to what she says and you'll do fine."
"I will, Father!"
Son started to stealthily reach for Jiraiya's torch again, but then all three players froze in place.
The barker stepped forward, his young voice now somber. "And then came tragedy. Against all odds, the Mighty Jiraiya fell in battle."
'Jiraiya' whirled suddenly into furious action, shouting and kicking, spinning and thrusting his torch to and fro, smashing aside imagined enemies...and then jerking as something struck him in the back. He stutter-stepped once, caught his balance, spun and swung his torch to demolish whatever invisible enemy had struck him. He beat it to the ground with several hard strikes, then crushed it with one stamp of his heel, then slowly collapsed in on himself as he crumpled to a knee. He froze there for long seconds, then stood, shifting back to a neutral stance, with his torch still at his feet. He turned to the audience and surveyed them with a weighty gaze. What he saw seemed to please him because he smiled very slightly, and then he turned and walked slowly off the stage. One of the black-clad stage hands retrieved the torch from where it lay and trailed it along in 'Jiraiya's wake as though the Will of Fire were escorting him off to the Pure Lands. Actor, stage hand, and torch disappeared behind the curtain.
Moments later, 'Mari' and Son left the stage, moving calmly off to stage left and right respectively before curving back around to hide behind the curtain.
"And thus began a new chapter in the life of The Mighty Jiraiya's family," the barker said, a smile breaking out on his face.
Son entered from stage right, a stack of papers in one hand. "Mommm!" he shouted.
'Mari' entered from stage left. "Yes, Son?"
"These are the new sales figures from my board games!" Son said, waving the papers. "Take a look."
Mari took them from him and studied them for a moment without turning them around. She flipped a page over, skimmed down, then tidied the stack, turned it around, and handed it back to Son.
"Those are indeed the sales figures from your board game idea," she said. "It was a very clever one too."
Son preened. Both of them froze and Son turned his head to the audience, smugged, then turned back. "It was, wasn't it? The civilians really like them!"
"They sure do, Son. And that food bank that you thought up, the one with the seals? That's valuable too!"
"I know, right? The civilians are eating way better."
"They sure are, Son. Speaking of good ideas, have you been working on your ninja skills?"
"Oh, uh, yeah. Yeah! Absolutely. You know me, mom. I train super hard, just like every ninja."
'Mari' smiled and patted him on the shoulder. "You certainly do, Son. You certainly do. So, on a completely different topic, how are things with Lady Yamanaka? My beloved Jiraiya went to a lot of trouble to get Lady Yamanaka's father to pledge you two."
Another player stepped up at stage left, another teenage boy dressed as a woman, this one with a long blonde wig on. In 'her' hand was a torch, slightly smaller than the ones that 'Jiraiya' and 'Mari' had carried. At stage right came another 'girl', this one dressed in all green with short brown hair.
"Is that supposed to be—" Akane began.
"Yes," Hazō said. "Pretty sure."
"But—"
Without looking away from the stage, he reached out and stroked her hair. "Welcome to public life," he murmured.
Up on stage, the action had proceeded. 'Mari' had exited and Son and 'Lady Yamanaka' were speaking.
"I am pleased to become your fiancée," 'Lady Yamanaka' said with a demure bow of her head and dip of the knees that would never, ever, ever be performed by Yamanaka Ino, not even as a birthday present for her boyfriend. "My clan is honored to unite with the blood of The Mighty Jiraiya, and our union will be a great thing for your clan. It will provide the connections to Leaf that your clan, so new in Leaf's service, are still developing." 'She' inched up closer, swaying in a teenage boy's best attempt at female seductiveness. "I hope it will also be great in other ways."
"Yeah," Son said, giving 'Lady Yamanaka' a thorough up-and-down look. "Yeah, very great." He embraced her and leaned in for a kiss; 'Lady Yamanaka' arched back, eyes closed and lips overly pursed in stage-style kissing pose.
Two inches from completing the kiss, Son suddenly looked up and caught sight of the 'girl' in the green outfit, who was currently training in a form of hard-style taijutsu that had been created by a blind person who had never had hard-style taijutsu described to them. He froze, staring in fascination, completely forgetting about the 'woman' in his arms.
The pose held for a slow count of five. The first titter escaped the audience at three. At four, several people started laughing. At five, 'Lady Yamanaka' opened one eye, cleared her throat loudly, and closed it again. The audience broke up.
"Huh? Oh, right!" Son said. He dipped forward, miming a flurry of kisses across his betrothed's face with a noisy "mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah!" The audience continued to laugh.
Son stepped back from 'Lady Yamanaka', who seemed a bit flustered as she fixed her hair. Behind her, the girl in green stepped off the stage and continued performing her wince-inducing 'kata' as she moved away and towards the curtain.
"This was great," Son said to his supposed betrothed. "Definitely great. Let's totally do it again tomorrow, okay?"
'Lady Yamanaka' blinked several times. "Yes. Of course. That will be lovely. I shall look forward to it, my betrothed."
"Cooool," Son said, flashing her two thumbs up. "See you then!"
He turned away and waved towards the girl in green just as she vanished behind the curtain. "Hey! Hey, you! What's your name?!" he shouted as he ran (minced) across the stage, exiting stage left as 'Lady Yamanaka' fled to stage right and looped back around behind the curtain.
The audience was already applauding when the stage hands dropped the curtain and the players came back onstage to take their bows while the barker went around with upturned hat, into which showered one- and five- and even a few ten-ryō pieces.
"I agree with you, Hazō," Kei said. "No proper Gōketsu adventure is complete without mind-shattering events awaiting us immediately upon, or at least very shortly after, entering the city gates."
Akane snorted. "We are going home now," she announced. "We are going to say hello to everyone, then bathe, then eat. And then, Hazō, you and I are going over to Ino's estate and tell her all about this travesty so that the three of us can laugh hysterically."
Author's Note: You spoke with Mari about things.
Appointing Yuno as Clan Warleader: Yuno has little to no experience of fighting as part of a team but she has excellent tactical instincts. Mari will work with her on integrating other people into her actions and work up from there. She says it's a good idea to have someone in the role and helping Yuno figure it out sounds like fun
(EDIT: You were unable to speak to Mai.) You suggest to Mai that she should learn a new element with the aid of Jiraiya's notes. She says 'yes sir' and goes off to check the notes
Gaku has several assistants already and is in good shape
You ask Mari and Gaku to look around for someone in the clan who is willing to learn technique hacking. They'll get back to you
Not sure what's up with adoptions but Hazō does the sensible things to progress it if possible
XP AWARD: 15 It took you 4 days to get home. I'm not sure if you ran like the wind or crawled like a dawdling tortoise, but that's how long you took.
Brevity XP: 4
"GM had fun" XP: 4 I watched the play in my head and then tried to capture it on the page. Not sure I managed, but the version I saw was hilarious.
Procrastination, Noburi thought, was definitely something he should try to avoid. He knew that his laid-back attitude lent him much of his natural charm, but he really needed to keep it within limits when it came to fulfilling his clan responsibilities. He even remembered his dad yelling at him to "fish or cut bait" when he was procrastinating on his chores as a kid, nevermind that Wakahisa, if ever they went fishing, certainly didn't need any kind of bait.
Unfortunately, his procrastination had finally come back to bite him. He'd meant to get around to wrapping up the interviews at some point or another, even if he never really had a time in mind for it. Sure, maybe he'd delayed the interviews with the Murai twins a little extra because they were attractive young girls of the exact sort that tended to invite axe-born retribution. But still…
"Gōketsu Noburi, step forward."
Noburi followed the instruction of the Hagoromo priest and grabbed a pinch of powdered incense. He marked his forehead with it, then leaned forward and cast the rest over the body of Gōketsu Misa, where she lay within her open coffin on the unlit funeral pyre.
Noburi stepped to the side and found his place to wait as Akane stepped up to do the same. He resisted taking a glance at Mio, Misa's twin. While her eyes were reddened, she didn't cry. Her face looked blank and expressionless, not the carefully controlled mask of a woman hiding a storm of emotions within, but the look of someone so utterly destroyed that she couldn't bear to feel anything at all.
He closed his eyes for a second, then reopened them, looking forward. One by one, the rest of the clan was coming up to pay their respects for the two fallen ninja.
Two fallen ninja. All things considered, Clan Gōketsu had done quite well through the war. Of the dozen or so ninja they had, only ten had been deployed on missions. Misa had died in one of the war's larger battles, the Battle at Akaitani Pass. Rock had caught an infiltration team in the area, both sides signaled for their reinforcements, and all the local ninja converged to a bloodbath. Leaf won the battle, thanks in part to Misa's sacrifice, taking down two Rock ninja for every Leaf ninja felled, and managed to take control of one of the Land of Earth's most fertile farmlands (which, given the rest of the barren country, had forced Rock to split their forces even further).
Mai, on the other hand, had been mostly kept in Leaf with the other partially crippled ninja. Only at the very tail end of the war, when Leaf was strapped for chūnin-power, had she been deployed. It was a mission that suited her limited capabilities, a quick and dirty flushout to get rid of a Rock border post that a scouting team had found. From the reports, she and her support team had emptied out the fortified cave with Gōketsu-standard levels of ordinance, then Mai had sniped down the fleeing genin before returning to Fire. A total success… until Rock's tracker squad caught up with them just past the border. From the survivors of Mai's team, it sounded like she realized she wouldn't get away with her limited mobility, and decided to stay back and stall the trackers so that her allies could escape. By the time Leaf reinforcements arrived, all that was left of her was scattered gore and a blood-splattered forehead protector.
Noburi shook his head slightly, prompting Akane to look over at him. He made a small gesture to say "I'm fine," then turned back to the proceedings. It would take a while before everyone would be done with the incense. Misa and Mai had both been on the estate since it was first founded, and Gōketsu, being who they were, didn't restrict civilians from paying their respects to the fallen ninja. From the looks of it, they had touched many, many people's lives.
Misa in particular had been an adoption target because of that, Noburi thought. She'd done more till-and-fill missions than any of the other ninja in Clan Gōketsu. When Noburi went around to the Tower to get more official records, he'd found something even more impressive – of all the ninja in Hidden Leaf, fifteen hundred to Clan Gōketsu's dozen, Murai Misa had done the most till-and-fill missions of everyone. Now, he'd never get the chance to ask her why.
He played through the adoption interview in his head. He knew enough to fit the pieces together.
What's your name? Murai Misa.
And what is your element? Fire, sir.
She was shy, so she'd probably not talk too excessively. He'd have to bring her out of her shell.
Do you know any Fire-style ninjutsu? Just what the KEI has taught me, sir. Some signal flares and a few basic offensive jutsu.
So you're a ninjutsu specialist? No, Lord Noburi, I use shuriken and kunai mainly, like he didn't already have enough young attractive female ranged weapons users with strong and similarly attractive overprotective older sisters in his life (if he had a ryō for every time that happened, he'd have two ryō, which was not a lot but it was still strange that it happened twice). The explosive tags that your clan provides have been very useful.
So, any hobbies? Nothing worth noting, sir. She'd probably not want to reveal too much about herself and keep it professional.
Are you sure? In Gōketsu, we all have our various little interests. Well, you don't have to share now. How come you're the only ninja in Hidden Leaf with over three hundred completed till-and-fill missions?
Well, sir, I wanted to show my worth to the Gōketsu so that you would adopt me and protect me like you would your own, but you clearly didn't do that, did you?
To be fair, he had given her the best chance he could have. When he realized he was delaying the twins' interviews, he asked Hazō to adopt them first and sort out the issues later (given their mission records, Noburi didn't anticipate any real issues). Misa had been given access to the clan's seals and techniques. They just hadn't been enough.
The last of the mourners cast their pinch of incense over the corpse and joined the rest of the clan at the right side of the pyre, now representing the rising sun. The priest, a young man named Hagoromo Uta, turned away from the audience to face the bodies. Unlike the mourners, dressed in the brilliant white that symbolized purity so as to not weigh down the spirits of the dead, the priest wore only blue. He had an elaborate headdress and layers upon layers of clothing, tied together by dozens of knots and beaded strings and ribbons, each of which probably had a symbolic meaning that Noburi had never bothered to learn.
"Rikudō Sennin iwaku, ninshū ni sugureru mono nomi…" The priest started to speak a prayer for the deceased in that ancient, incomprehensible scholar's tongue. Fortunately, the Hagoromo had the right idea when it came to ninja funerals – in the event that the body couldn't be recovered, the forehead protector carried the full spiritual weight of a ninja's presence. Hopefully, this would be enough to see Misa and Mai both safely to the afterlife.
Noburi took a quick glance at Hazō, who had been second after Mio to greet Misa's body. Noburi could tell that Hazō was using his bloodline to look calm and composed, but his Clan Lord was watching Hagoromo like a hawk. Noburi considered the merits of telling Hazō to knock it off, but decided to let it go. For all that the Hagoromo could be self-righteous pricks at times, and for all they had a general dislike for Hazō and the Gōketsu, this was bigger than a petty feud. In Leaf, the Will of Fire reigned supreme, and the honor and respect due to those that died in its service could not be denied.
Perhaps Noburi should have been glad that Hazō even let the Hagoromo onto the estate. He'd been prepared to argue with his brother to make it happen, as the rest of the Leaf-born ninja would have nearly revolted otherwise. Hazō (and Noburi (and Kei (and Mari (and Yuno (and definitely Kagome))))) might not have cared much for the Hagoromo's traditions, but for the rest of the clan, knowing that their soul would find peace in the afterlife was of existential importance. The expected ninja lifespan, even as a clan ninja, ensured that.
The priest finished the prayer abruptly, cutting himself off at the point of beseeching the spirits of the ancestors for mercy. Given Clan Gōketsu's eclectic and very recent origins, that wouldn't be necessary. He brought his hands together to form slow hand seals and cast a technique. On a nearby table, four dozen candles, each made of a black wax hand-carved into the shape of a lotus bud, flickered alight.
Mio stepped forward at Hagoromo's instruction. She took a candle and raised it above her head.
"To my sister," she said. "May you find the peace you were always searching for."
She knelt by the pyre and placed the candle at its base. As she placed it, the flame of the candle suddenly grew in size and started to sway as if moved by a gentle breeze.
Hazō stepped forward, taking two candles. He raised one, then the other.
"To Mai. May your next life treat you better than this one. To Misa. May your spirit be lightened by the lives of those you saved."
He set down his candles by Mio's, forming the start of a circle around the pyre, and they too flared to life. One by one, the clan's ninja proceeded, taking a candle or two, and saying a brief message for the deceased. Everyone offered a candle for Mai, but few offered one for Misa. She had been a shy girl, and the cultural prejudice against twins hadn't helped her much. Hazō got away with his offering as the Clan Lord, and Akane somehow knew the girl, but no one else knew her well enough to light a candle for her.
Well, it didn't matter how many other ninja they knew now that they were dead. As Mari had grimly joked this morning, they would be in good company. Once their urns had been prepared (only Misa's filled with actual ashes, of course), they would become the first (and with luck, the last for a long time) to join Jiraiya of the Legendary Three in the Gōketsu shrine.
Another thing he should be grateful for, Noburi thought, was that Hazō hadn't mentioned his intent to somehow bring them all back to life. Though on the other hand, Hazō had built the Gōketsu shrine in his standard style as a solid, rectangular brick of granite, so his merits and misdeeds balanced out and Noburi wouldn't have to thank him afterwards.
Jin, the last of the ninja to light a candle, stepped away from the pyre. Now, the clan's ninja ringed around the pyre, just like the candles they had placed. With every candle, the flames had grown brighter and taller, and now they danced wildly.
Hagoromo Uta approached the pyre. Out of the corner of his eye, Noburi saw Akane slipping away as gracefully as she could. Given her recent mission, he didn't blame her for not wanting to witness this part of the funeral. He certainly wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere near a Mist traditional send-off after the Sunset Racer.
"The Will of Fire burns in all of us. It is dimmest in those that reject it, and turn away from its warmth. It is brighter in the people of the Land of Fire, who accept it and cherish its protection. And it is the brightest in those that fight to protect it, the ninja of Hidden Leaf.
"Yet, the candle that burns the brightest burns the fastest. Those who love their country and their people the most, those that have most fully accepted the Will of Fire, they are the first to pass out of the Human Path. The Will of Fire is the will to protect those you love. The Will of Fire is the light which brightens your trail. The Will of Fire is the light which gives guidance to your family and strength to your comrades and warmth to your soul.
"Gōketsu Misa, Gōketsu Mai. In life, you served the Will of Fire. In death, you are shown to embody it. Your last actions were to fight for your Village and for the lives of your comrades, and the flames of their souls only continue to burn today because you were brave enough to shield them. You have brought death to your enemies and life to your comrades. There is no truer service to the Will of Fire than this.
"So, let it be known! The souls of these two are tired and weary. They have given all they had to give for the Will of Fire. Let their sins be cleansed! Let their burdens fall away! Let their spirits rise away from the world of mortals and join with the Flames themselves, so that they will guide us forever more!"
With Hagoromo's words, the candle flames jumped higher and higher, and at his final pronouncement, they twisted and formed into a ring surrounding the funeral pyre. Suddenly, the pyre started to burn from within, a powerful blaze erupting with a belch of smoke.
The funeral was silent, but for the crackle of flames as they spread outwards. As the fire reached the forehead protector and the coffin, Noburi braced himself for the scent of burning flesh, but it never came. Instead, Hagoromo reached out and threw a handful of powder that made the fire around the coffin burn pure white for an instant.
With the spirits purified, Hagoromo sank to his knees and bowed his forehead to the ground before the fire. Around Noburi, the rest of the procession did the same. After a moment, he followed them, bending his head to the ground and shutting his eyes tight, trying desperately to forget the melting face of Gōketsu Misa, a sister he never met.
The amount of paperwork that had piled up during Hazō's time away was extraordinary, almost as if he'd left leadership of a steadily-growing clan to a sixteen-year-old medic who had never so much as led his own mission. It would have been nice to take a day to unwind after the gruelling as-the-crow-flies journey back (maybe infiltration wasn't the only reason for a ninja to travel by ship after all), but when Hazō saw the date on the top of the first unprocessed form…
"Hazō, you look like a man fresh off a nap on a field of vampire grass."
"I feel like one too, Snowflake," Hazō confessed. "I have already scheduled five meetings for tomorrow, sent two letters of apology, humbly requested to renegotiate a contract—which the Janai Cooperative will almost certainly refuse—and called Jin to my office for disciplinary measures Noburi didn't think were necessary but I do. All of this, of course, with incredible care so I don't make Noburi feel like he failed at the job or undermine his authority in front of anyone or make things more difficult for him next time he needs to act as regent. If I don't get a mug of hot chocolate inside me within the next five minutes, Noburi will have to face the consequences of his actions and inactions alone because I will be dead."
"That would be a problem," Snowflake agreed. "Would you like some cookies with your hot chocolate?"
"Cookies?"
She proffered a tray covered with perfectly circular brown objects that put him in mind of nothing so much as Kagome-sensei's blast discs.
"Where did these come from?" he asked, tired enough that he only afterwards registered that the cookies were on a tray.
"I baked them myself," Snowflake said with an edge of pride. "Baking is domestic hobby experiment no. 8, following the failure of knitting due to self-inflicted dispelling and embroidery due to boredom."
Home-made cookies were, in fact, exactly what Hazō needed to revitalise him. Hazō reached out…
…and his missing-nin danger senses flared in warning.
"Say, Snowflake," he asked carefully, "where did you get the recipe?"
"Kei recalled it from Ami's most recent attempt," Snowflake said, explaining everything. "However, these cookies are intended to surprise the Snow Globe—which is why I am baking them here rather than at the Nara compound with its optimised facilities—and not as a weapon of mass destruction, and so I have taken care to reverse her instructions in every way possible."
Logically, then, Hazō should expect to be filled with unimaginable bliss the second his tongue touched them. That sounded good right now. Also, it wasn't like he could refuse on principle to take a bite of something Snowflake had made.
He picked up one of the perfect discs and bit into it with a resolve that would hopefully cancel out any insult from his initial hesitation.
He had never tasted anything like it before. Nutty, bitter, squelchy yet solid, oddly fishy, sweet and salty, and intensely rich yet somehow also hollow… it was a true feast for the senses, the kind where the paranoid host murdered all his guests at the end.
Snowflake stared at him with keen expectation, waiting for his judgement.
As far as he knew, this was Snowflake's first cooking attempt of any sort. If he told her the truth—that one taste of these would be enough to get her hired by the Yabai Café—it might be a blow to her eternally fragile self-esteem from which she would never recover.
"Delicious," he forced out. "I can't believe you've never done this before."
Now all that was left was to figure out a way to save the others.
Snowflake relaxed. "That is exceedingly reassuring. To me, they tasted utterly vile— I was offering them to you for their nutritional value, given that you had immediate access to hot chocolate to overwrite the flavour. However, if it is my sense of taste that is the aberration…"
Hazō weighed several factors in the balance, including his long-term credibility and the Nara Clan's short-term survival.
"Sorry," he said awkwardly. "They're actually terrible. What did you put in them?"
"Kokuto, bark flour, gull eggs, and pig milk. I did not deviate from the standard array of cookie ingredients in any way, and yet…"
Snowflake sighed.
"Also, Hazō, I am disappointed in you for nearly sabotaging a vital experiment with dishonesty. You of all people should be aware that I am not only accepting of criticism, but expect it as the default response to my activities."
"Sorry," Hazō said again.
He cast around for a way to change the subject.
"So did your first Gōketsu-style adventure live up to your expectations? I know our plans more or less got ruined by the intelligence controlling the caverns—Mild Peril my foot—but in a way that's representative as well. I direct you to the Cold Stone Killers incident."
Snowflake nodded as she tipped the remaining cookies into a reinforced storage box, closed it securely, and put it in a storage seal (to Hazō's alarm). She looked down at the granite floor, her gaze slowly tracing its imperfections.
"You were all in mortal danger," she said quietly, "and I was completely unable to protect you. I could not fulfil my purpose of standing between danger and my loved ones. Neither my training nor my combat skills applied. You seized survival with your own strength, myself a mere passenger, and had you fallen after expending it to its limits, I would not even have known my fate, much less chosen how to face it. It was a reminder of the degree to which I am unreal next to any of you, and that is an experience I doubt any Gōketsu adventure has previously featured."
Silently, Hazō tried to take this in. He didn't move to make himself hot chocolate.
Something about Snowflake really did look ephemeral in that moment, like the slightest wind might blow her away. It made Hazō want to reach out and hold her in place, but of course he couldn't.
Hazō had felt helpless countless times throughout his life. His mind flashed to the killbox, the crystallised expression of being forced to wait while somebody else decided your fate. He'd never been absent for his near-death, though. It had always come at the hands of an overpowered chakra beast, or a furious S-ranker, or an enemy ninja in exactly the wrong place at exactly the wrong time… Always something he could fight, even if in vain, or something he could face with dignity. Though it didn't exactly apply to him, Mist religion taught that those who repented on their deathbed would be spared the traitor's afterlife, so long as they expressed their repentance by offering up their fellow traitors' names and active plans, and doubtless there were other religions with similar provisions.
What was it like to know in advance that when you died, it would have nothing to do with you, as if some kami rolled the dice and took you off the board when it wasn't your turn? Many people, Hazō thought, would actually welcome such a death. Dying in the shinobi world tended to be violent, painful, and filled with the despair of a mission failed or loved ones unwillingly abandoned. Nobody died with their dreams fulfilled. Compared to all of that, maybe it would be better to just… disappear.
But not for Snowflake, and not for him. Hazō had every intention of defying death to the final moment. Hazō had every intention of defying it beyond. Even without that, after everything Hazō had survived against all the odds, every reprieve he had won and yes, every time he'd clung on long enough to be saved by someone else, if there was one thing he refused to be killed by, it was giving up hope.
Snowflake did not have that option. Whether Snowflake was present for one of Kei's battles at all was determined by decisions about chakra efficiency and by events earlier in the day. If she was present, then in the ideal scenario she would disappear before anyone else, taking a hit that would otherwise go to flesh and blood.
Hazō had no idea what it was like to see the world from that perspective. He couldn't. He had no consolation to offer that wouldn't come from the bizarre yet undeniable heights of mortality privilege.
"I'm sorry," Hazō said.
"On the contrary," Snowflake said. "You sought to fulfil my wish. It is not your fault that I did not know what I was wishing for.
"If it is of any help," she added as if she was supposed to be the one consoling him, "I did enjoy the preceding parts. For all the complexities of my existence, there is satisfaction in protecting and supporting you in a way even Kei cannot. Nor do I regret accumulating new experiences unlike any I have known so far, and in all probability unlike any ever experienced by a human being before."
Hazō noted that in Snowflake's mind, Orochimaru didn't seem to qualify as a human being. Fair enough.
Now he thought of it, this wasn't the first time she'd consoled him when she was herself in need. He'd been in no state of mind to remember to thank her that time, never mind to consider her own pain—he'd been the one to give the order, sure, but in Snowflake's mind, she and Kei were the reason there'd been an order to give.
"Speaking of new experiences," he said with an attempt at levity which he didn't feel he pulled off, "I wanted to thank you for putting your hand on my shoulder after the execution on the skytower. I know it must've meant reaching outside your comfort zone, but you did it for me, and it was comfort exactly when I needed it. Without you and Kei, I might have been trapped in that spiral of self-loathing for a lot longer."
"I… I have no idea what you are referring to," Snowflake stammered.
Hazō just smiled.
After a few seconds of looking anywhere but at Hazō, Snowflake's shoulders slumped.
"Even I am aware of how unconvincing that was. Enjoy my excruciating embarrassment while you can, Hazō."
Fortunately for Snowflake, Hazō was the very soul of mercy, and besides, no matter how cute she was when she squirmed, it was bad form to tease somebody when you were in the middle of thanking them for something meaningful.
"You know," he said instead, "I seem to remember you planning some kind of experiment back when we were in Neck that you needed my help for. Are you ready to tell me what it was now? You know I'll help however I can."
He'd expected this to lead to less squirming, not more.
Finally, Snowflake took a deep breath and straightened up.
"Very well, Hazō. But are you certain? There is an acceptable but nevertheless noteworthy risk of grievous bodily harm, and the resulting data will be of significant value to Kei and myself, but not at all to you."
"How much risk of grievous bodily harm?" Hazō asked warily.
Snowflake walked over to the counter, outside Hazō's reach, and put down the emergency self-defence pouch without which no ninja ever left their home. Hazō was aware that they were well past that stage, but the unthinking gesture of trust was pleasant nonetheless.
"Less now," she said. "If you wish to reduce it further, then please hold still, arms down by your sides."
"Snowflake, what kind of experiment is this?"
"Do not make me say it," Snowflake said. "Also, it is optional but preferable that you close your eyes."
Hazō owed Snowflake, he reminded himself. There were things she'd done for him, and things he'd failed to even notice he needed to do for her. Also, Snowflake was not Kei, and her record of attempted Hazō murder… actually, now he thought about it, Snowflake didn't have a record of attempted Hazō murder. Wow.
He closed his eyes.
For some time, nothing happened, or at least nothing Hazō could hear.
Then there were footsteps, slowly moving around, finally stopping directly in front of him.
"Remember… arms down by your sides."
He needed the reminder, because the very next thing he felt were her arms around him. They were tentative at first, closing in jerky, hesitant steps over the course of seconds until they finally overlapped behind his back.
He heard the hiss of an indrawn breath.
Her body pressed against him. The edge of her ribbon brushed against his neck. It was only a light touch, but it was enough for him to freeze completely as a panicked series of "What do I do?"s ran through his mind. He was suddenly, intensely aware that he was being hugged by Snowflake, that he had no idea what to do when being hugged by Snowflake, and that he had no idea what was running through her mind either. Also, there was no way this didn't qualify for a Kei death penalty somehow.
…
She was warm.
Idiot, of course she was warm. She was a shadow clone, not a statue.
Did that mean Kei was warm as well?
Should he be… doing something right now?
No, wait. Arms by sides.
He could feel her shifting slightly as she breathed in and out.
At last, she pulled away sharply.
"Y-You may open your eyes now."
He opened her eyes, seeing her now at the other end of the kitchen, well away from him.
"Thank you for participating in this experiment," Snowflake told him at approximately half again her normal speed. "Eight seconds is the second best result so far. Please expect Kei to conduct her own measurements when she next sees you. I must go and record this immediately. Goodbye, Hazō."
She paused only long enough to grab her pouch.
"Wait, Snowflake! You forgot your cookies!"
After a few seconds to stare after her helplessly, Hazō shook his head and went to make himself some hot chocolate. Nobody in the clan was going to believe what just happened even if he told them.
-o-
Feedback from Mari:
Calling her spy network a spy network would be generous, but she's doing what she can with what she's got, which is a lot more than anybody else could do with what she's got. Her main headache at the moment is some kind of play-based reputational warfare against the Gōketsu, origins unknown but probably with metal threads in their beard. In addition to the kind of play you've seen, there are performances exalting the sacrifices of the various clans in the war, which leave a very obvious and emphatic gap for the Gōketsu, and also notably dwell on the valour of the Condor Summoner who was given a summoning scroll by Leaf so she could go and fight for the village.
Mari reiterates that Atomu would make a terrible diplomat because the clans simply wouldn't respect him. No, nobody would outright refuse to meet with him, because senior ninja know the difference between disrespecting the Gōketsu and insulting the Gōketsu, but it would be free slander for your political opponents, and it would alienate clans like the Akimichi that have yet to make up their mind. Besides, you may know that crippled ninja aren't worthless, but he might well feel differently if his disability leads to the Gōketsu being outcasts. (Also, his experience managing a bunch of homeless civilians and a handful of genin and academy students is not in any way the same as juggling the political interests of a dozen affiliate clans.)
Mari has no problem with Akane or Yuno's candidacies. Akane is in need of something that'll help rebuild her self-esteem, and she's as qualified as anyone in the clan. Yuno lacks leadership experience and has questionable social skills, but she's the clan's second best fighter and an inspiring if intimidating figure on the battlefield. Mari's trying to slowly bring her around so she's more willing to work with her and take lessons, but it's hard to keep momentum going when certain people send her on lengthy away missions at delicate stages in the process. Both have agreed to take the roles, and you may consider the appointments to have gone ahead.
Mari is perplexed by the mention of Fuyuki, whom only Kagome, that expert in clan management, can vouch for and whom nobody else really knows. Mathematical skills are certainly a prerequisite for the treasurer job, but Mari considers them the least important part, since they can be taught and indeed the Gōketsu have a whole institution for teaching them. Trustworthiness and reliability count for far more in her mind, and she thinks you should think carefully before buying an exorbitantly expensive adoption slot for Fuyuki, much less handing him the keys to the Gōketsu vault.
Feedback from Noburi:
Everybody in the clan is prepared to try their hand at learning basic medicine, even Atomu (who can at least learn the traditional medicine components, even if he understands that his dream of using medical ninjutsu is unlikely to ever be more than a dream). This would annoy Asuma by pulling a bunch of ninja off the mission roster, but there's not much he can do about it unless he wants Tsunade kicking down the door to his office.
Noburi will train them if that's what you want, but he doesn't seem excited about it, insofar as it's a full-time job that keeps him away from his personal objectives.
Feedback from Kagome:
Putting medical knowledge in the GED curriculum is possible, and of obvious benefit, but it's not realistic to get anyone to "useful in a clinic" level with it. If Noburi has to develop a full (e.g. L20) traditional medicine course for the Gōketsu ninja, you could use incentives to get people to join that, but otherwise it doesn't seem like money well spent.
Feedback from Atomu:
Atomu would be delighted to be in charge of the salterns if that's what Lord Hazō wants, though you'll have to explain exactly what that entails (since without MEW, he can't make any, and presumably you don't want him running around northern Iron collecting salt from the ones you've got).
Feedback from Hazō:
If today is going into clan management/Snowflake management, you can't also pursue the all-day activity of sealing.
Feedback from Gamabunta:
Noburi (Rapport): 24 + 3 (Invoke "Zone of Friendship") + 3 (Invoke "The Hokage was My New Dad") - 3 dice = 27
Noburi spends a FP to reroll!
Noburi (Rapport): 24 + 3 (Invoke "Zone of Friendship") + 3 (Invoke "The Hokage was My New Dad") + 3 dice = 33
Begrudgingly, Gamabunta has agreed to send a Toad diplomat to Dog. Noburi had to negotiate quickly to avoid irritating the Toad Boss, meaning the terms of the deal are not very favourable. First, Noburi needs to offer a substantial amount of trade goods to Gamabunta for free as tribute. Second, the Toad "diplomat", an irritating young Toad named Gamakadan that Gamabunta wants to discipline for some unknown crime, can only stay there for 1 month. Third, Noburi is on the hook for personally escorting the toad there and back, through allied Pangolin and enemy Hyena territory (unless Noburi wants to find another route), and it's his skin on the line if Gamakadan gets hurt. (Cannai has already agreed to keep the Toad diplomat with the Pangolin envoy near the border with Hyena.)
-o-
You have received 4 + 1 (Brevity) + 1 (Fun-to-write) = 6 XP. Noburi has spent 1 FP and gained 1 FP for winning a conflict with meaningful consequences.
"Okay sensei," Hazō said, rubbing his forehead lightly. "I don't think I followed that. Let's start over."
"I don't see what you're not getting, it's not hard," said Kagome. "Look, this part here-"
"The Motoyoshi Toggle?"
"Yes, the Motoyoshi Toggle! What other root component is there in this part of the seal?"
"Sensei, the seal has four different components that independently intake chakra," Hazō said, pointing one by one at the different parts of the seal. "Any of them could be a root component. I'm not even sure how you infuse it without getting the power ratios hopelessly out of balance."
"It's- look-," Kagome blabbered before biting his lip and starting again. "Okay. So the Motoyoshi Toggle feeds energy through this pathway here, right?" he pointed. "And then this twist here increases the chirality of that energy, and it feeds into itself until the chakra is sufficiently spinny that it can go through the resonant transducer here."
"Sensei, there's no stabilizing elements around the twist. There'll be both positive and negative spin going into the transducer. Won't that cause higher order dimensional effects?"
"Which dimensions?" Kagome asked, looking smug.
Hazō examined the seal, producing a piece of paper to take notes with. After a moment, he frowned. Then he looked closer. The frown got deeper.
"Sensei. This would inject unstable chakra into the ninth dimension. This would cause a full resonance failure cascade, wouldn't it? Fifth through thirteenth dimensions."
Kagome shook his head. "Looks like that, doesn't it? But when you're infusing it, there's not much power at first, so the unstable effects don't kick in until the seal is at full power. And the Yanagihara Transformer here reverses the step-down energy chirality and feeds it back into the resonant transducer, so it cancels the higher order instabilities."
Hazō slapped the table. "How can it cancel the higher order instabilities? You're basically feeding in two, no, four highly volatile chakra feeds into an ephemeral dimension! There's no way that it doesn't just explode!"
Kagome nodded sagely. "I thought it'd go boom at first too. But it's really not like that. Not only does the ninth order effect cancel out fully, with this subgraph here it collapses the higher dimensions and reduces the chakra construct to only three spatial dimensions. That's how the construct deranges itself from phase space and into the real world."
Hazō shook his head. "There's no way that the chakra feeds cancel each other exactly. It would be like throwing a rock into a pond, then throwing a second rock in in a way that cancels the ripples. It's just not possible."
Kagome looked at him, then put his hand to the blank with a focused look. After a moment, he pulled his hand away and Hazō felt the Iron Nerve's familiar pressure in his head as he looked at the infused seal. He copied the seal into his mind and briefly inspected it – exactly the same as the blank Kagome had been explaining to him.
Hazō sighed and rested his forehead in his hand. "The Fourth was insane. I don't get how this didn't cause a sealing failure."
"It's really not that hard," Kagome said. "I hated it at first but it all clicked after a bit. You should learn it! We can even start now. Here, we can use the Tamai equations to expand this component…"
"Sorry, Kagome-sensei," Hazō said, raising his hands apologetically. "I can't get into the seal workshop yet. I still have a lot of clan work to catch up on before I can afford to take a few days off."
Kagome scowled. "Make Gaku do it. The two seals I've done so far have already taught me so much. You can't miss out."
"I'll get around to it, sensei," Hazō said. "Could you show me the other seal you learned?"
One even more dizzyingly complex explanation later, Hazō sighed. "Fine. I'm throwing in the towel. I know it seems easy to you, but you worked on this for two months. I don't think I'm going to get it until I spend that long myself. Anyway, my biggest question is the same. Is this useful for opening the Rift?"
"I dunno, maybe?" Kagome said. "On the one hand, if we could somehow make the chakra construct form on the other side, or somehow push it through the transshift canal, then we could try to design a chakra construct that could be paired across both sides and inflate the rift the way we thought of on O'uzu. On the other hand, the stuff I've seen so far won't work for that. The symmetries that make these chakra constructs stable depend on the construct being centered on the seal. They can't be moved otherwise… well, it would be a big boom, at least."
Hazō sighed. "But maybe other seals in the series will give us an idea of how to translate the chakra construct?"
"Probably not. All the ones we have are seal-centered. I think I have enough to design a paired seal that would open the rift. Hold it up on one side to make a chakra construct, hold it up on the other to make another, then use chakra-sensing mechanisms from your chakdar or something to link them up and inflate the transshift canal. Not easy, but I could do it. Maybe."
"Sure, but if we had a way of getting to the other side, the problem would be solved," Hazō said, rubbing his chin. "While I was walking around the estate, I heard Kenta talking about anchor screws, which you can push through a wall to wedge a hole open. Is that a helpful sort of thing to have? We could bring him in and get his advice on how to design a seal that does that."
Kagome shook his head. "No. I mean yes, that would be good, but that's not the hard part of the problem. Easy enough to design a thing that opens the Rift if we could even get anything to the other side, but the transshift canal is smaller than a pinhole. We can't push a big chakra construct through it without getting it open wider first."
"I see… so we need a certain type of chakra construct to open the portal, but it would be too big to push through, and we have no way to cause it to form naturally on the other side, is that right?" Hazō asked, and Kagome nodded. After a moment, Hazō spoke again, "I've been thinking, the issue is basically that the storage space blew itself out, right? So if we push energy into it like a normal storage seal, it would just fly out the back end. What if we just tried to push a ton of energy in? If we did enough, is it possible that it would inflate, just a little? We could come up with a chakra source like the koi or those weird chakra-gems we found."
"Should blow those stinking rocks up and scatter 'em in the woods, that's what," Kagome muttered. He had been horrified at the team's reckless delving into a cave filled with exotic chakra beasts, and even more horrified that they'd brought stuff back out. Hazō had managed to convince him not to burn all their findings. Now that he thought about that conversation, Kagome-sensei had acted weirdly when Hazō described infiltrating the town. It had been nice to use his disguise kit after so long. He pushed the thought out of his mind. Not the time.
"If we can push enough chakra through from this side that it opens a little, then we can push whatever chakra construct we need through on the back of the other big chakra flow. So, would that be possible?" he asked.
Kagome shrugged. "Maybe pushing way too much energy in opens it, yeah. Or maybe it dislocates the transshift canal some more and when it opens up, gaki pour out and they suck our guts out through our faces. Or maybe the storage matrix disintegrates and the Rift disappears forever. Or maybe there's other punctures in the storage matrix that tear open new portals and the damnbeats decide they're gonna turn us inside out and send us back to Leaf to incubate their babies. Or maybe the chakra flux tears apart the high-energy chakra construct that we're sending through and the explosion kills all of us. Or maybe the chakra construct doesn't anchor on the other side and floats off into the afterlife until one of the umbral devourers comes around, eats it, and decides it likes the taste of our chakra and wants to eat the rest of us. Or not. I dunno."
"Okay, so we have no clue and we should basically treat it as a sealing failure. Got it."
Kagome shrugged. "We're working with a sealing failure and pretending it's predictable. We're gonna die no matter what, and it'll probably suck. Sure, we'll probably get our faces melted if we try it, but maybe it just works and we don't get our faces melted. Or maybe it works and our faces melt anyway because sealing failures can just melt your face anyway and there's nothing you can do about it."
"Sure. Well, at least we have something. At some point, we should try to research that rift-opening seal, even if we can't use it yet. Maybe once we have a start, we'll be able to find another way forward. Anyway, how have things been with the Arachnids been? Any progress on the Great Seal?"
Kagome scowled. "I've been waiting for you, dummy! Kumokōgō doesn't want to provoke the Dragons any more, and apparently they haven't been leaving the Great Seal much. She's not sure if they're scared because you killed one or if they're up to some shenanigans there, but apparently she doesn't want to bait them away if it makes them go kill more Arachnids. Don't you have the tunnel there? We should go that way!"
Hazō nodded. "Yeah, okay. We can try to sneak under the butte sometime. Still, the last few times I was there, it was with the help of a bait team. We definitely wouldn't get a chance to look straight at the Great Seal if there were Dragons around, but I could probably show you some of the underground parts."
"Sure. Better than your crappy replica, anyway."
Hazō put his hand to his chest. "That took me a whole day to make!"
"Waste of a day," Kagome said with a snort, "There's a reason why the other Leaf stinkers moved on, and not just because the big stinker made them all go into the sweatshops to make skywalkers for his war. Looks like crap. Bits and pieces kinda look like seal components here and there but not really."
Hazō sighed. "I've been meaning to work on the Earthshaping technique to make a better replica. I'll have to do that at some point. Anyway, before Mari comes and makes me look over her proposed plans for the roads initiative, tell me about Harumitsu. Was he okay when you were teaching him?"
"Oh, the kid? He wasn't bad. Better than you, really. Not half as reckless. Maybe not even a quarter. But still, we were working on storage seals, and he ended up mixing up two equations, and…"
o-o-o
Hazō knocked on the door. Inside, there was the sound of rapid footsteps, then clanging metal and furniture being knocked over, along with the soft pops of shadow clones dispelling. After a moment longer, the door swung open and Naruto leaned casually against the doorframe.
"Ah, you're early."
Hazō smiled, and glanced at Mari, who nodded. "Were we interrupting something? We can come back in a few minutes, if that would be easier."
Naruto shrugged. "It's no biggie." He paused for a moment, then opened the door wide. "Actually, it's fine. Why don't you come in?"
Hazō and Mari climbed the pair of steps leading up to Naruto's house and followed Naruto to the sitting room. Hazō couldn't help but sniff at the air. The furniture was in perfect order, clean and in its correct places, yet there was a slight, sweet scent in the air. As he looked around, he saw another Naruto coming in through a side door, and in the stairway, he saw yet another Naruto racing up the stairs with a mop soaked in… chocolate sauce?
Naruto closed the door behind him and sat down. Hazō and Mari sat opposite him on a lumpy and uncomfortable couch. Hazō tried briefly to settle down into a more comfortable position, but decided to just bear it, since wiggling probably looked undignified.
"So. Today's the day, huh?" Naruto asked.
"That's right," said Mari. "Kagome has made some progress on the jinchūriki seals, and Hazō will be looking over his work in detail sometime soon."
Naruto glanced at Hazō, then back at Mari. A little bit of worry seeped out of Hazō. He'd been afraid that Naruto would still be furious at him, but the boy instead had a look of forced neutrality. It wasn't amazing, but still better than the Naruto who didn't care to hide his hostility a few months ago.
"Okay. So what do I need to do? You said lying down on a table and poking around, right? I assume you're not gonna make me lie on a gurney like Snakedude's operating tables, so we could use a bed in a guest rooms for that."
"Sure, that'll work?" she said, inquisitively, looking at Hazō. Hazō nodded, and she continued. "Yes, that's fine. We did have some questions we wanted to ask, first."
Naruto leaned back in his chair. "Well, I can't talk too much about my capabilities, you know. And I don't know shit about sealing, so I won't be much use to you there. Is there anything that I can actually answer?"
Mari shrugged. "Well, what's being a jinchūriki like? Yagura never talked about what it was like with the Three Tails, but it clearly affected his mind somehow. Did you ever experience anything like that?"
And that was why they couldn't bring Kagome along. He thought the Fox would just murder them all if they told it that they knew it was possessing Naruto. On reflection, Hazō had decided to go through with it anyway.
Naruto looked up at the ceiling. "Nothing like that at all, no. The inside of my head's always been pretty normal, aside from the shadow clone stuff. No weird voices telling me to kill everyone and burn the village to the ground, if that's what you mean. Just a whole lot of chakra."
Mari laughed. "Well, I don't think the voice in Yagura's head made him want to burn the village to the ground either. Maybe it was the reason he was as cruel as he was, though in fairness, I have known some awful kids. Either way, you clearly don't have that going on.
"We spoke with the Monkey King, Enma, a while back. He mentioned that there was a jinchūriki in Whirlpool who got corrupted by her Tailed Beast. Apparently something about its chakra drove her crazy. Do you think that your dad's seal is protecting you from that?"
Naruto shrugged. "I dunno. I mean, my situation is definitely different than the other jinchūriki, right? I wasn't crazy powerful like Yagura or Gaara from a super young age, and I'm also not nuttier than a triple-stack pecan pie with extra pecan. I guess I'd chalk it up to my dad's seal, except my mom also wasn't crazy. So maybe it's a Nine Tails thing instead of a seal thing."
"Speaking of which," Hazō said, "you mentioned the name Kurama, rather than just the 'Nine Tails'. Are you able to speak with it at all? If so, we have some important questions we want to ask it, like about the Dragons. They're giant monsters on the Seventh Path made to fight the Tenfold Abomination."
Naruto shook his head. "Never heard of Dragons before you showed up, and nope, I can't talk with it at all. And I'm not eager to try, since I think that means that it would be released from its seal, and apart from the fact that you would all die, who knows what would happen to me."
"So where did you hear the name?" Hazō asked.
Naruto shrugged. "Not sure. I've always known what it was called, even when I was a kid. Figure Jiraiya or the Third Hokage told me at some point. No clue how they knew, but they were both knee deep in ancient and forgotten lore or something like that."
Mari bowed her head. "We lost a lot of wisdom when they passed."
Naruto pursed his lips for a moment, then nodded. "Yeah."
"There's another mystery about the jinchūriki that you could maybe help with," Mari said. "In Jiraiya's will, it was mentioned that he wanted to leave the Toad Scroll to you, but couldn't since you weren't eligible to be a summoner, presumably because you're a jinchūriki. Do you know why that was?"
Naruo laughed. "Hah, I remember that. Yeah, it was because I'm a jinchūriki. I bugged him about it for a bit when I realized he wasn't going to teach me summoning and he said that I'd have no problem learning the technique, but I couldn't actually go to the Seventh Path. Something about Tailed Beasts not belonging there. He said I could talk to Ma and Pa if I wanted to find out more, but I forgot to ask in the end," he said, scratching the back of his head.
"Huh," said Hazō. "Alright, that's all we had. If you're ready, can we do the inspection now?"
Naruto nodded and disappeared in a cloud of smoke. A moment later, the side door opened again and two Narutos entered, one carrying a tray with tea and biscuits. He said, "TreasonFoiler here can escort Hazō to where Prime is, and I brought some snacks for us while we wait for him to finish up with his freaky sealmaster bullshit."
Mari laughed lightly at Naruto's nickname, and Hazō smiled uncomfortably. He left the room, trying not to feel uncomfortable separating himself from Mari with a maybe-hostile jinchūriki right by his side. Naruto TreasonFoiler gave him a glare, then started leading him down the hall.
"I would say this goes without saying, but everyone I've talked to about you says that I really need to say all the things that go without saying. So, you're going to leave all your seals outside the room before you go in there, and if you do anything even remotely threatening towards Prime, you'll be eating three Rasengans before you can blink."
Hazō nodded. Yet another reason to not bring Kagome along. Completely separate from the whole treason thing (or the other treason thing), Naruto hadn't liked Kagome after the sealmaster blew up a few of the jinchūriki's clones in the Basement. Hazō could empathize. He definitely didn't want to find out what Kagome's directional explosives felt like point-blank.
"Understood. I do have a couple seals that I'll need to use to collect diagnostic data, but I can show them to you now, or you can even have a clone operate it if you'd prefer."
Naruto TreasonFoiler nodded and after a brief inspection of the chakrascope and chakdar, Hazō left the rest of his seals behind and entered the bedroom.
Naruto was sitting on the bed, and gestured at Hazō. "Ah, you're here. Took you long enough. What do we gotta do here?"
Naruto TreasonFoiler closed the door and crossed his arms by it, trapping Hazō in the triangle of clones. Naruto Prime smiled at him from on the bed.
Hazō took a seat right next to the bed. "Just the basics. I'll be checking against the Fourth's notes to see if there's anything in particular to look out for, but first I'll just draw out a copy of your seal to reference against."
Naruto's grin widened. "You're gonna draw a copy? Might have some problems with that. But hey, let's get on with it."
He pulled his shirt off and lay down on the bed. Hazō stood and closed his eyes for a moment, strengthening his resolve and remembering for a moment the feeling of Akane's hand in his and of Ino's lips against his cheek. He didn't know what was about to happen, but given his experiences with the Summoning Scroll and the Great Seal, he didn't want to take chances. He walked towards Naruto slowly. He readied his brush and drawing pad, then stopped as he saw the black seal strokes on the jinchūriki's stomach.
They moved.
Can Hazō tell what's going on with Naruto's seal? This is unlike any of the sealing that he knows of, so Sealing won't be of any use. He just needs to piece things together from the visible details, so it's Examination.
Hazō (Examination): 5 + 6 = 11
Very nope.
Hazō stared at it in bewilderment for a moment. In a circle on Naruto's stomach that stretched from just under his ribs to below his waistline, black marks shifted and twisted around across his skin. There was no visible pattern that he could see. Some of the marks twisted back and forth like writhing worms, and in other places spirals emerged from a single point and wrapped around themselves before unrolling into nonexistence. Ink dots appeared and disappeared on his skin like twinkling stars, and other blobs of ink raced around in loops and zig-zags. No seal Hazō had seen had ever done anything like this – it shouldn't even have been possible! Even the tiniest of mistakes in scribing a seal would lead to a sealing failure, and among other reasons, the instability of skin as a surface was part of why biosealing was so dangerous. A seal that changed shape should have been impossible.
Then Hazō realized the other confusing part of Naruto's seal. He was looking straight at it, fully taking it in, yet the Iron Nerve didn't recognize it as a seal. He hadn't copied anything new at all and he didn't feel that pressure in his mind that meant he was looking at an infused seal.
Naruto kept a straight face for a few moments, soaking in Hazō's bewilderment, then burst out laughing, causing the slowly shifting patterns on his stomach to suddenly dance in mirth. "Hah! You sealmasters all have the same face when you look at it. The same furrowed brow, mouth hanging open, 'what the fuck is this' face. Is that something you have to learn in order to get the license?"
Hazō shook his head. He couldn't get caught up on this. He had already seen one strictly impossible seal before in the Great Seal. He turned to the clones. "Do you have a seal like this as well?"
They looked to Naruto, who gestured at one of the yet-unnamed clones to show Hazō. The clone raised his shirt, and Hazō saw the seal again. This one was unmoving.
Hazō raised an eyebrow. "And how about you?"
The other clone glanced at Naruto and then raised his shirt as well, showing a copy of the seal on the first clone.
"Do all your clones have the same seal on them?" Hazō asked.
"Nope," said Naruto. "The ones made at the same time do, but at different times they get different seals. I'm pretty sure it's just a copy of whatever's on my skin when I cast the technique."
Hazō sighed. "Well, I'm not going to be able to copy out your seal like this. Let me take some readings with the chakrascopes, then I'll draw it off one of the clones."
"Great, thanks for letting me skip the boring bits. Maybe I'll go catch up with Mari while I wait."
Hazō breathed deeply, ignoring the shifting pattern of the seal on Naruto's stomach, then started pulling out his diagnostic seals to see if he could figure out anything more.
Hazō collected a bunch of chakra readings. This may or may not provide a relevant Aspect in the future. He also has copies of a few snapshots of the jinchūriki seal. Unfortunately, those copied out snapshots are not particularly legible to a sealmaster. While there are a few brushstrokes that look like they might be sealing components, most of it just seems like randomly placed ink that doesn't even all connect together. This is not particularly helpful to Hazō or Kagome. As per usual, the Fourth's higher-level notes are incomprehensible, and Hazō could parse nothing useful there.
Asuma is unwilling to send Noburi on the extended mission of chakra-beast extermination that would let him get enough combat experience to remove his rustiness. Your options right now are sadly limited to Leaf and the entire Seventh Path.
Additionally, Noburi has told Hazō that at some point during the Neck mission, Orochimaru came by to purchase the Dragon parts permanently. After Noburi said that he wanted to check with Hazō, Orochimaru "politely" asked to keep the last set of scales that he was lent while Noburi waited for Hazō to get back, and for Hazō to come see him to negotiate the sale. After confirming that the extended duration of possession of the last set of scales would be compensated for retroactively, Noburi said yes (with only a little bit of killing intent applied). You may want to do that soon.
When Hazō tries casting Earthshaping on Earth Clones, the Earthshaping technique is hard to cast at first, as it is challenging to push chakra into the Earth Clone. After enough effort, the Earthshaping technique takes hold. At that point, the clone disintegrates and the Earthshaping only affects the mud it was once made of. Earthshaping has no effect on the Earth Clone if it was made as a chakra construct.
Hazō is nearly finished catching up on Clan Head duties. He will be free for longer affairs like sealing research in a couple days.
XP Award: 10 + 2 (brevity) XP
GM-fun Award: 2 XP (sealing stuff is always great)
Vote time! What to do now?
Voting ends on
Chapter 550, Part 1: One Dragon, Used, For Parts Only
Hazō didn't run, because that would have been unbecoming of a clan head, even if being late was utterly unacceptable. No, he walked to Orochimaru's compound at a dignified, stately pace, and if Noburi was having trouble keeping up, that just suggested that his brother had been slacking off on his exercise while acting as regent.
"Slow down, Hazō! I know I said we were cutting it too close, but that doesn't mean I want to see him pissed off because we got there half an hour too early!"
Hazō slowed down fractionally—very fractionally, the kind of fraction that was so tiny Kagome-sensei didn't think Honoka was ready to learn about them. Noburi was right, of course. Hazō had spent so much time optimizing for this meeting with Mari and then Kei (whom he'd caught muttering to herself about calderas after he described his ability to stay calm and cordial in front of the man who'd tried to kidnap and vivisect them mere months ago). He couldn't afford to slip up now.
He thought back to the research notes. The odds of Orochimaru caring enough to ask whether Hazō had read them were miniscule, but if he did, then Hazō failing to answer would send his stock plummeting faster than a diving Dragon. The most interesting point to him, and one he felt he could discuss if called upon, was Orochimaru's analysis of the disintegration effect. Orochimaru claimed that it was not a special Dragon power. Instead, after about an hour of arguing with Noburi over the probable meaning of terminology neither of them had ever heard before, followed by ten minutes of supercilious correction by Kei (who didn't know what it meant either, but was capable of providing a detailed list of what it couldn't mean), they concluded that he thought it was a consequence of what the Dragons were, not a natural property. Orochimaru seemed to take it for granted that the foundational laws of matter were somehow local, and speculated that wherever it was the Dragons had originally come from, it was different enough from the Human Path that not all of the same laws applied. Then, when Dragon matter came into contact with Human Path matter, they did not mesh together nicely, and strange things happened at the interface. From Hazō's combined summoner/sealmaster perspective, it sounded a lot like Dragon and normal matter were having a fight over which was more real, and Dragon matter was consistently winning.
-o-
Orochimaru lounged on one side of the coffee table in the parlour of what was once more his compound. Hazō and Noburi sat with spines ramrod-straight on the other. Orochimaru had not offered refreshments, which was just as well since Hazō had no intention of consuming any substance the mad researcher had prepared except at kunai-point.
"Thank you for making time to see us, Lord Orochimaru," Hazō said. "I promise we won't waste any more of it than necessary."
Orochimaru nodded with no particular emotion. Behind him, a labcoat hung off a coat stand, the glint of finely polished metal shining off the tops of several pockets. The fact that it was perfectly clean somehow only made it seem more sinister, as if it were a blank canvas waiting to be painted with Orochimaru's arts.
"You have come for back payment for the Dragon parts," he stated.
"Actually," Hazō said, "that was just a side detail. But you're right, we should take care of that now, before we move on to the main topic."
Orochimaru rose abruptly. Hazō, with the Iron Nerve holding him together, managed not to flinch. Noburi wasn't so lucky.
Orochimaru either didn't notice or didn't care. Instead, he walked over to a cabinet up against the wall, pulled a drawer out seemingly at random, and took out a file. He turned back to them, then paused.
"Kabuto tells me you were able to follow the saline purification theory I used to cure the bulgerat fever epidemic."
"Me?" Noburi asked, reeling back slightly in surprise. "I mean, yes, I did. I… I was very impressed with the way you modified the ritual prayer to moderate the effect of the purgative decoctions."
Orochimaru looked at him for a second, then put the file back and took out a different, thicker one. He tossed it on the table between them.
"Will this suffice?"
Noburi reached over and gingerly picked up the file, then began to leaf through it. After an initial frown of confusion, his eyes slowly lit up. It was as if he'd just been given a favourite author's latest book, and it had miraculously lived up to the hype.
He nodded firmly at Hazō, then reluctantly closed the file.
Orochimaru took his seat again. He looked at Hazō expectantly.
"If I may, then," Hazō said. "Lord Orochimaru, I would like to offer the Gōketsu stock of Dragon parts to you for permanent sale."
The sensation of Orochimaru flashing into alertness nearly made Hazō jump. The man hadn't done anything, merely shifted from lounging back to leaning forward, but to Hazō's subconscious it was like seeing a predator appear out of the bushes—this despite the fact that in this case, the predator had already been in full view.
"Done," Orochimaru said.
"Uh… good," Hazō said, not exactly shocked by Orochimaru's decisiveness (he wouldn't have made the offer if he didn't expect Orochimaru to be interested), but more than a little unnerved. There were other decisions Orochimaru could make in the future, ones a lot less healthy for Hazō or the Gōketsu, and if he made them with the same speed and lack of hesitation…
"There are some things we'd like in return," he went on. "First, could you station a snake in Arachnid territory? I think that if you could see the Great Seal and the Dragons first-hand, it would give you a lot of useful information, and it might make it easier for us to cooperate in dealing with them."
Orochimaru considered.
It was unnerving how long he could go without blinking.
"I will require your full data on the surviving Dragons. You will be responsible for providing any maps required by the Snake side and making any arrangements required on the Arachnid side."
"Of course," Hazō said. "And any insight you have to offer regarding those surviving Dragons would be greatly appreciated. Obviously, when we kill them, we will divide the remains up fairly, and we'll be open to negotiation regarding any that you weren't involved in killing."
Hazō took a moment (but only a moment) to study his interlocutor. Orochimaru wasn't exactly easy to read, but so far his expression was relaxed and he didn't seem to be bored, irritated, or homicidal. Hazō pressed on.
"Next, I'd like to request half an hour of your time."
"Pleasingly specific," Orochimaru noted. "Why?"
Because Orochimaru valued his time more than he valued stacks of research notes capable of revolutionising entire fields or bank accounts bursting with ryō. Mari was certain of it.
"I have some questions for you," Hazō explained. "One of the Gōketsu's biggest weaknesses is access to lore—notably on Dragons and the Great Seal, of course, but we also seek information on the Sage of Six Paths in general, the Akatsuki ritual, and the afterlife, among other interests. We'd like to know what you know on these subjects, but there are probably days' worth of conversation in there, and we respect your time."
"Half an hour…" Orochimaru mused. "Very well. Kabuto did request leave for an errand. However, handing secret lore to dabblers is like handing live explosive tags to an infant, save that infants do not harbour visions of universal revolution. I will decide which subjects are acceptable, and I will dismiss you early if you try my patience or waste my time."
"…understood." It wasn't much of an offer, but frankly, Hazō had spent so long beating his head against the wall of forbidden lore that right now he'd take any solid information from a reliable source that wouldn't care enough to lie. "If you have any notes or writings you're prepared to lend me, that would also be excellent."
Orochimaru raised an eyebrow. "You intend to spend your time on the kind of lore that can be committed to writing?"
Just what kind of information did Orochimaru have access to?
"I'm still finalising the list of questions," Hazō hedged. "The next thing—"
"There's more?" Orochimaru interrupted.
Hazō swallowed. Was it time to back off? But he hadn't actually bartered for much at all yet, and there was no guarantee that Orochimaru wouldn't end up vetoing all the questions Hazō really cared about.
He weighed his desire to get his money's worth for unique, precious research objects bought with the blood (or whatever Hornets had instead of blood) of countless warriors versus his desire not to offend Orochimaru (who would at best turn down the deal, and there wasn't actually anyone else who wanted the Dragon parts).
"Just one more specific request," Hazō said, "and everything else is at your discretion. The trade goods you used before—research notes, money, land, any useful ninjutsu or seals—will all be fine. But I was wondering… do you know any ninjutsu that can reduce the need for sleep? The days are too short, and there's always so much to do, even with shadow clones."
Orochimaru nodded. It might almost have been a gesture of understanding, but Hazō didn't know whether Orochimaru was still capable of such a thing, or whether he'd excised it along with whatever other core elements of humanity he considered to take up too much space.
"There is no ninjutsu with that specific function," Orochimaru said, "and the system is poorly-adapted for subtle body modifications to begin with. I do not…"
He paused, thinking. His eyes briefly ran up and down Hazō's body in a way that would have been embarrassing and alluring coming from an attractive woman, horribly creepy from anyone else, and in this instance made Hazō reflect on how easily a person could be disassembled with the right tools, which was not the kind of thought he ever wanted in his head.
"I do have a bioseal," Orochimaru decided. "It would require invasive surgery, and for you, it would have side effects if misused."
Reduced sleep was actually possible? It wasn't just another dream? He could get the paperwork out of the way at night and actually have time for a life during the day?
Hazō eagerly opened his mouth—
"What kind of side effects?" Noburi asked.
"Various disruptions to the mind, notably influencing cognitive and emotional function, vulnerability to disease spirits of various breeds, and impaired reflexes and coordination, among others," Orochimaru listed. "Naturally, these do not occur if the seal is used correctly."
"We'll get back to you," Noburi said firmly before Hazō could say anything.
"Have your decision ready at the sixth bell tonight," Orochimaru said.
"Why sixth?" Hazō asked.
"It is when you will receive your half hour. I will expect you to have a satisfactory knowledge of basic medical tools and terminology."
"May I ask why?" Hazō asked.
"I should think that would be obvious," Orochimaru told him.
Don't provoke the man capable of showering you with riches or shattering your mind at a whim, Gōketsu Hazō. Just nod and move on.
"So you want me to be here at six?" Hazō asked just in case.
"That is what I said."
"I understand," Hazō lied. "For the rest…"
"Yes, yes," Orochimaru said impatiently. He fished a handful of scrolls out of one of his robe's voluminous sleeves and tossed them carelessly on the table.
"Those will be perfect," Hazō said after a quick scan followed by a decision not to try his luck a second time by asking for more. "It's a pleasure doing business with you, Lord Orochimaru."
"I disdain insincerity," Orochimaru told him without any particular feeling. "Have the parts delivered by the end of the day."
Hazō hoped that was a reference only to the Dragon parts, and not to his own coming at six.
-o-
Part 2 coming this weekend. Contents of the scrolls TBC, but they will be sufficiently valuable to make this more than a fair trade. You may assume that Orochimaru is not going to give you anything that's actionable for the Sunday update, and begin planning now. Your plan should include your response regarding the sleep reduction bioseal.
Edit: Voting is open, and closes on Oct 23, 2022 at 9:00 AM . Note that this is later than the usual deadline.
After an afternoon of desperate medical training that made last-minute Academy exam cramming look like a day spent lounging in bed, Hazō was finally out of time. He'd been let into the compound by a harried-looking Kabuto, who'd paused only long enough on his way out to direct Hazō to Specimen Storage B in the Basement and mutter something he probably meant to be reassuring about the first time being the worst. Hazō could only hope that Orochimaru's intentions for him were on the innocent side, like being forced to hold down a psychotic octocat while Orochimaru trimmed its claws.
The Basement was different now. When Hazō had come here as part of the investigation team with Naruto, it had been filled with the ominous, oppressive air of impending doom—amorphous, nameless, dormant but never dead. Not anymore. The omens had come true. The doom was no longer impending. There were no octocats prowling the corridors, but the death they once carried on the tips of their tentacles was now soaked into the walls. If Hazō so much as reached out to steady himself against one, the accumulated despair that had painted itself into the grey stone would surely pour down his arm and into his soul, and then his body might eventually leave, but he never would.
With its master returned, the Basement had regained its true form.
"Why are you wearing your normal clothes?"
Orochimaru himself, of course, wasn't remotely affected by the Basement's soulcrushing aura. Lack of soul might have had something to do with that. As Hazō gingerly entered the room, the architect of it all stared at him in innocent puzzlement, himself clad not in a labcoat, but in a wide leather apron of indeterminate colour which had probably once been brown and now was best left unexamined.
"Well," Orochimaru decided, "it is no concern of mine. The world will only benefit from one less of Jiraiya's garish ensembles."
He returned his attention to the objects in front of him: three gurneys of a pale wood that Hazō hadn't seen in Fire, each bearing a figure covered with a grey sheet from the neck down.
Hazō had a very bad feeling about what it was Orochimaru had called him here to assist with.
The boy on the left was roughly Hazō's age, with short, carrot-top hair and milky white eyes that stared unseeing at the ceiling. The bald man in the middle, lying with eyes closed, didn't have anything wrong with him at first sight, but any ninja that age was either a jōnin or long since off the roster. The woman on the right…
Hazō's heart stopped. What was she doing here? It made no sense for her to be here. Why hadn't he heard? Why hadn't he been given a chance to do something?
Orochimaru traced Hazō's gaze, locked helplessly on the victim in front of him.
"Hmm? Subject 1374? Why not, I suppose. The process should have run its course by now. Take it and follow me to the anthropotomy chamber."
Hazō couldn't move. She was still alive. She could still be saved. Wasn't there anything, anything he could do?
"All my subjects are lawfully sourced and here by consent," Orochimaru said impatiently. "If you do not have the stomach, leave. Better no assistant than one I cannot rely on."
Hazō was frozen in place. He needed answers, answers only Orochimaru might be willing to give him. Worse, if he left now, Orochimaru would lose whatever little respect he might have for him, and that threatened their future cooperation against the Dragons. He wanted to go, to be anywhere but in this space soaked in the aura of cold death. But he had a responsibility.
Still, some things were too cruel.
Lord Orochimaru, would you mind choosing someone else instead?
But that wasn't something Hazō was allowed to say. It was one thing for Orochimaru, to whom all three must have willingly given themselves, to decide their fates. Hazō didn't get to condemn a stranger to a torturous death just to spare himself some suffering.
Hazō shook his head, not trusting himself to speak, and walked over, measured step by measured step, to the head end of the gurney. He placed his hands on the handles.
There was no sign of recognition in Noda Kaiyo's eyes as she looked up at him.
Step after step. Mechanical. Regular. Reliable. The Iron Nerve had no feelings that could be shaken, no morality to challenge Hazō's own. It simply obeyed.
Just like Hazō simply obeyed.
If only he'd adopted her. And left a different body to lie under the sheet? If only he'd made the Final Gift Programme not exist. And found a different way to placate Orochimaru forever? If only he'd been able to destroy Orochimaru instead of just blackmailing him into "good behaviour". Do not even think the thought here. Orochimaru has other gurneys.
The horror came only with a dual blade of hypocrisy. What right did Hazō have to feel anything when he had not felt those things for Orochimaru's other victims, month after month after month, playing board games and going on dates while this was going on under his nose?
And go on it would. Hazō didn't have the power to stop Orochimaru. He didn't even have the will, not for as long as Orochimaru was necessary to save the world. Not for as long as this was the lesser evil.
They were set up and ready to operate before Hazō realised it.
"Remove the sheet and place it in the combustibles box in the corner."
At least one question was answered as Hazō did. Noda's left leg was missing, removed at the thigh with a crisp diagonal cut, likely from ninjutsu rather than a blade. There must have been a Fire user on the scene, or she'd have bled out in seconds.
Hazō suddenly realised where he was looking on a naked adult woman and hastily turned away. It was too late to talk about Noda being afforded dignity, but he intended to salvage whatever of his principles he could.
There were three flashes of light behind him—red, yellow, green—and a series of chords like a dirge being played by a string instrument. Orochimaru gave a satisfied "hmm".
"Cleansing pomander," he said.
Pomander, pomander… What in blazes was a pomander?
Oh, right.
After altogether too many seconds, Hazō found the fist-sized silver sphere on a nearby tray and offered it to Orochimaru by the attached chain.
"Lit, you fool."
Hazō scrabbled for a tinderbox, and after several attempts (the Iron Nerve wouldn't calm his trembling hands here—the tinderbox was longer and narrower than any he'd used before), he lit the pomander and closed it up again. A faint smell of incense began to permeate the room.
Orochimaru flipped one of several hourglasses on a counter next to him as he began waving the pomander over Noda's body in a deliberate pattern. Her eyes moved to follow it.
"You may ask your questions."
Right. Questions. The thing he was here for. His mind wasn't at its clearest now, but the questions were a list. Hazō, even at his worst, was a master of lists.
"Could you tell me about Akatsuki, Lord Orochimaru? What was their true goal?"
Orochimaru's lips twisted in disgust. "A violation of free will on an untold scale, fuelled by the extraordinary delusion that mutual understanding begets peace, and a slavish faith in the Sage of Six Paths despite knowing more about his failures than any in history."
"Could you be more specific?" Hazō asked. "What was the purpose of the ritual?"
"That need not concern you," Orochimaru said. "It will not be possible to replicate it for another millennium."
Orochimaru turned back to Noda sharply. Hazō still wasn't looking in her direction where possible, but he heard a series of retching sounds, and a "tsk" from Orochimaru.
After a moment, Orochimaru handed him something that looked like an oversized white slug in a pool of clear liquid.
"The scrolls on the third shelf are for secure storage. Place the chakralyte in the metal box, close it securely, and reseal. Quickly, now."
Hazō hurriedly reached out for a storage scroll with his non-slug hand—
Hazō: Alertness 33 - 4 = 29 vs TN ??
Hazō notices the warning signs in time.
Hazō: Athletics 40 - 3 = 37 vs TN ??
Hazō fails to get out of the way.
Hazō: Physique 29 - 9 = 20 vs TN ??
Hazō shrugs off the effect.
Feeling the slug suddenly expand in his hand, he nearly did the stupidest thing imaginable and threw it away from himself (and towards Orochimaru, Noda, or shelves full of alchemical reagents), but fortunately he was too slow.
The blast covered his haori and his undershirt in vile-smelling yellow paste, far more than the slug should have contained.
Orochimaru gave another "tsk".
"Remove the affected clothing and place it in the box. Quickly, before it soaks into your skin."
Hazō had never undressed faster in his life.
A second later, his clothes were safely inside an armoured container oddly reminiscent of Jūchi Yosamu's and the container was safely in another dimension until such time as Orochimaru saw fit to retrieve it and examine the horrors within. The skin on Hazō's chest tingled uncomfortably, but the feeling disappeared over the next few minutes.
"What about the Five?" Hazō asked. "Could you tell me about them?"
Orochimaru looked at him as if he was an idiot.
"You have Mori as your stepsister and your fiancée, and you are asking me about the Five?"
Duly noted. Wait, what?
Hazō suspected "They're refusing to share their secrets, so you please tell me instead" would not be a good follow-up.
"OK… What about Pain? How did he get his Sage-like powers?"
Orochimaru abruptly turned to face him full-on.
"Look into my eyes, nephew."
Oh, hell.
Hazō had suspected that if he asked the wrong enough thing, there could be a price higher than simply annoying Orochimaru. He just hadn't imagined it would be that easy.
There was nowhere to run. Orochimaru didn't need eye contact to destroy Hazō in any number of ways.
Hazō simply obeyed.
Orochimaru's eyes were yellow. Serpentine. In the bright seallight of the anthropotomy chamber, the pupils were vertical and narrow. There was no warmth in them, no recognition of shared humanity, nor even any real interest. The Hazō reflected in them was a stunted, pitiful creature, scrabbling for shiny pebbles in the dirt while self-made chains of morality, responsibility, and above all lack of imagination made sure he'd never look higher than his feet.
"Do you see the Rinnegan?"
"No… I don't."
Orochimaru turned back to Noda, who suddenly began to struggle against the bonds on her wrists and ankle.
"Hypnodisc extract, brown bottle, second shelf."
Hazō tried to hand him the bottle, but Orochimaru didn't take it.
"One drop into the mouth every five seconds for thirty seconds."
Hazō, still unable to believe he was doing this, was about to ask how he was supposed to get Noda to open her mouth (and why wasn't she saying anything? Surely nobody could be silent at this), but Orochimaru looked into her eyes, and whatever she saw there, it made her open it at once.
Hazō moved to stand over her head. He began to count in his head.
"What was the thing Pain summoned to resurrect the other Akatsuki?" he asked.
"The so-called King of Hell?" Orochimaru clarified without looking away from the seals he was placing on Noda's abdomen. "A dramatised misnomer. Even the Sage was not so foolish as to attempt to summon the King of Hell bodily to the Human Path, much less to save a handful of minions. It would be like inviting Tsunade into my home just to… No, in fact it would be like inviting Tsunade into my home. No elaboration is necessary."
Hazō could have laughed, if it had been possible to laugh as Noda's struggles grew weaker with every drop.
"So what was it?" Hazō pressed.
"No. 5 bonesaw."
"What? Oh."
5 was one of the smaller ones, right? Or was it counted from the other end?
Orochimaru accepted the small, fine-toothed saw without comment.
"A marketplace, I suspect, or perhaps a disposal chute. Pain was ever circumspect about the nature of his powers."
Hazō looked away as Orochimaru leaned over Noda's chest and began to saw, pausing periodically to glance at the pulsating glow of the seals.
"Do you know what Pain's bird summon was?"
"To call that creature a summon is to disgrace the profession of summoner," Orochimaru snapped. "I can only assume that it was for some twisted kind of completionism that the Sage, creator of the Summon Realm, should have seen fit to so debase himself."
The topic was annoying Orochimaru. Time to back off.
"Rosewood wand, crown-tipped."
Noda whimpered.
Hazō passed Orochimaru the wand.
"Wh-What about the three Tailed Beasts Pain had time to… process?" Hazō asked. "Are they dead? Perma-dead? Or have they already reformed and we just don't know where?"
"It was not Pain's intent that mankind ever see the Tailed Beasts again," Orochimaru muttered as whatever he was doing to Noda's chest made a horrible wet sound. "With the ritual interrupted, it is impossible to say whether that intent will be fulfilled, but he was not a man to give up until the final moment."
"I see," Hazō said.
Noda gave another whimper. Hazō felt a flicker of anger at the universe to add to the horror. All of this was happening because Noda had succeeded—because the lonely, self-isolating woman had broken free of the trap of alcoholism and trauma, at least enough to find someone she believed was worth dying for. If she'd only stayed the way she was before, there would have been no need for her to sign up to the FGP, and then… and then…
"Tweezers."
Hazō passed Orochimaru the tweezers.
"Could you tell me about the other Paths?" Something completely unrelated to this. "How many are there? How are they connected? What is known about them?"
Orochimaru didn't look up. "Ask something else."
…Right, then.
"Is the Great Library real?"
Orochimaru looked up this time. "Nephew, you have met the summon clans. Are you under any illusion that several of them could work together for an extended period of time when spurred by any concern lesser than total annihilation?"
In Hazō's mind, the glacial pace of the Conclave brought into question whether even that was enough.
"Point taken," he said. "What about Ninshu?"
"Ninshu?" Orochimaru asked. "Where did you even hear that word?"
"I…" Where did Hazō hear that word? He'd definitely put it on the list of things to ask about, but amidst all the unexpected stress of the afternoon, he could no longer remember why.
"I have no idea."
Orochimaru straightened. He put the bonesaw aside. "Are you mocking me, boy?"
Hazō felt a terrible cold chill, not helped by being able to see what Orochimaru had been in the middle of doing to Noda. How could any human being still be alive in the middle of that?
"No, Lord Orochimaru! I misspoke! Please forgive my impertinence!"
There was still sand in the hourglass, but Hazō could feel that he was running out of time. He had to get through at least the important stuff before Orochimaru's patience ran out.
"Jōnin auras!" Hazō exclaimed. "You're probably the world's greatest expert on chakra and biology now—do you know what jōnin auras are and how they work?"
This conversation had better never get back to Tsunade.
"Jōnin auras?" Orochimaru repeated. "Oh, you must be referring to the conscious aetheric stimulation of the oracular node for temporary harmonic alignment of the full tertiary chakra network, combined with a forced resonance effect. I thought you were here for ancient lore, not to waste my time on something so simple."
"Right," Hazō agreed. With enough research, he'd surely be able to figure out what at least half of those words meant without having to push his luck further with Orochimaru. "What I really want to know is about the tenfold abomination. Do you know what it was?"
Orochimaru frowned. "How can you possibly know about the Five, yet not about the tenfold abomination?"
"Are they connected?"
"The tenfold abomination," Orochimaru said with the air of one despairing at the stupidity of all around him, "was a primordial being variously said to be the incarnation of malice, the soul of magic, and the kami's final punishment for mankind's hubris. It was the nemesis of the Sage of Six Paths, and he and his companions devoted most of their lives to its defeat. This much is common knowledge to any scholar of the arcane."
"The Sage created the Dragons to battle against it, didn't he?" Hazō asked. "Can you tell me anything about them?"
"Me?" Orochimaru asked. "Tell you about Dragons?"
"Um."
"Nephew, I am rapidly losing patience. Make your remaining questions brief."
Hazō hastened to obey.
"Are the Watchers real?"
"I believe so."
"What happened to Whirlpool?"
"The same thing that happens to all naïve fools who believe that learning is the key to mankind's salvation."
"Specifically?"
"They discovered that mankind did not wish to be saved, and left to seek a place where they could simply study in peace."
"Have you ever heard of Hidden Depths?"
"Is this a jest?"
"I mean the ninja village."
"No."
"What's up with Bear?"
"Do not go to Bear."
"What are summoning scrolls?"
"I have nothing to add to what you should already know as a summoner."
"What are chakra golems?"
"I have not heard the term before."
"Do you know of any chakra-dense locations like the Swamp of Death?"
"Several. Of those relatively accessible, there are the Crags of Doom in Mountain, the Caverns of Mild Peril in Honey, the Forbidden Dungeon on Crimson State Island, Mount Certain Death to Any Fool Who Dares Approach in Snow, and the Travelling Island in the Nanmen Ocean."
"Do you believe that the Sage and his brother used technique hacking and medical ninjutsu to create Bloodline Limits?"
"If I did, I would not have invested so much time in biosealing."
"Does 'the Nameless Fear' sound familiar?"
"Yes."
There was a low, mournful tone from one of Orochimaru's seals. Noda twitched.
"You may leave now. You would only be underfoot for the next part."
If Hazō could ask just one last question…
"Is Jashin real?"
"You already asked about that," Orochimaru said. "Now leave."
"One more thing!" Hazō remembered. "Lord Orochimaru, thank you very much for your kind offer, but I've decided I would prefer not to have a bioseal."
"Cowardice and ambition are incompatible, nephew," Orochimaru told him, then put down the tweezers and began to reach inside Noda's exposed chest cavity with his bare hand.
Even though Hazō was the one who got to leave that room alive, he felt as if it was his heart, not hers, being squeezed with a merciless, icy hand.
-o-
You have received 4 + 1 (Brevity) + 1 (Fun-to-write) = 6 XP.
-o-
Voting is closed until @Paperclipped's upcoming update.
Hazō sat at his desk with his eyes open, staring into the distance.
He felt empty. Noda… hadn't died, yet, but probably wished she had. And he'd been a part of her final torture.
He closed his palms, ten fingers rubbing against the solid wooden surface of his desk. Should he feel soiled, defiled? He had pushed her into the operating room, and he had provided Orochimaru with the tools he needed to do whatever he was doing.
Yet, he didn't feel dirty. He simply felt like a failure. Every moment, his mind was drawn back to what he could have done differently.
For Noda, the answers were clear. He could have made it clear she was welcome on the estate, he could have asked the KEI to advertise that the Gōketsu were glad to provide for injured ninja and their families, he could have assigned someone to check on the recently crippled ninja to ensure they would manage their lives well.
But Noda wasn't the problem. He could have saved Noda, but Orochimaru needed bodies to work on. If it wasn't her, the pressure and the price would have risen until someone else gave themselves to the Basement. The hydra could not be slain by cutting off its heads. Was there a way Hazō could have stopped the Final Gift Program from ever happening?
Ideas, half-formed and ill-considered flitted through his head, only to be slapped down by the cold hammer of reality. Could he have arranged teams to capture enemy ninja at Orochimaru's behest? No, that would have provoked war sooner and made peace and AMITY impossible. Could he have destroyed Orochimaru's Basement while the Gōketsu still owned the house? No, Orochimaru would simply rebuild, and would need to experiment twice as much if knowledge had been lost, and Hazō would have ended up on an operating table as the subject of his ire. Could he have killed Orochimaru?
Hazō knew there was no solution. The monster needed to be fed till it was satiated, for it could not be destroyed.
Yet, he couldn't stop thinking. Even if he couldn't stop Orochimaru altogether, could he have found a solution that was even marginally better? Could he have saved just one person, one Noda, from that torture?
Someone knocked at the door of Hazō's study. It was Gaku, by the cadence.
"Enter," Hazō called.
"My lord," Gaku said with a bow as he entered. "I am aware you are stressed at the moment. Would you rather I return at a later time? Perhaps tomorrow?"
"No." Hazō shook his head back and forth like a dog, trying to shoo the thoughts away. "No, I think it's better for me to be doing something right now. Is there anything urgent for me to do?"
"No, my lord," Gaku said, entering the study and gently closing the door behind him. "There are no clan affairs that require your immediate attention. You have now addressed everything which I'd thought particularly urgent."
Hazō sighed. "Good. I'm going to take a few days off and do some sealwork with Kagome. Something to clear my mind."
"Is that related to the reason you returned to the estate last night rather… underdressed?"
"Yes. Also, could you send a messenger to the Yamanaka? I'd like to see Ino tonight."
"It shall be arranged, my lord."
Hazō looked at Gaku, who was clearly waiting for instruction. Hazō pulled himself up to his full seated height. "Fine. It's not urgent, but it's clan business isn't it?" Gaku nodded. "Let's get this over with."
"As expeditiously as I can, my lord. First, Lady Mari has sent several notes on the investigation into the plays featuring yourself, apparently aimed to degrade you in the public eye. She notes this has been ineffective at swaying the civilian population's goodwill towards you. Furthermore, while she continues to suspect the involvement of the Hagoromo for clear motives, she concedes that this is far more subtle than their clan lord is capable of. She suspects the Hagoromo are opening their purse strings to theater troupes solely on another's advice. She has no evidence of this, but is coordinating with Lord Haru to investigate further. She is unsure if there is any counter-action required from you at this juncture, but invites you to consider your options."
"Got it," Hazō said. "Not the Hags directly, but they may be involved, and there's definitely someone else out there trying to slander us. And that faction doesn't quite get how pointless it is to try to turn the civilians against the Gōketsu after all we've done for them, especially while the other clans left them in squalor." Hazō put his head in his hands and rubbed his forehead. "Why are we under attack at every corner? Why can't these people just let me help without attacking me for doing the right thing?"
"Politics, my lord. Next, Lady Yuno requests leave to return to the mission rotation. Lord Yuma saw some unusually strong chakra beasts in southern Fire, and Lady Yuno wishes to, ah, investigate this." Gaku extended a scroll. "She has already arranged the extermination contract with the Tower, and requests to take Lord Yuma and Lady Mio along with her."
"Granted," Hazō said, examining the mission statement and handing it back over. "The more dead chakra beasts, the better."
"I concur. While you were gone, the Wakahisa piscist pronounced the koi pond ready to draw chakra from."
"Oh, is that so?" Hazō asked. "That's good news. We'll save a lot of money purchasing chakra. Has there been any progress on expanding the koi pond further?"
Gaku shook his head. "Lord Noburi said that he spent time speaking with the piscist. Apparently, the school is already quite large, and consequently rowdy. It may be dangerous to expand further. He says that this corroborates his experience at the Wakahisa compound, that they did not have schools of hundreds of koi, but rather several ponds of dozens of koi. We would need to construct additional ponds."
"Right," Hazō said, "do that."
"Certainly sir. I've already gone over the expense sheets and placed orders for the same materials the piscists requested we reimburse during the initial construction of the pond. I trust you will arrange negotiations with the Wakahisa for the additional koi eggs?"
Hazō waved a hand. "I'll figure it out. Next?"
"Of course, my lord. I'm uncertain if he told you, but Lord Kagome was invited to give a lecture at the Leaf Central Academy. Regrettably, the fallout of the event means it is relatively unlikely to be invited for further guest lectures."
Hazō paled. "How many injured or dead?"
Gaku quickly held up his hands. "Oh, my apologies. None at all. Or at least, no physical injuries, though apparently, the psychic trauma may have been lasting" Gaku shook his head. "He merely disturbed the academy students with his lectures. Apparently, he was telling stories about the various sealing failures he'd seen."
Hazō shuddered. "Okay, I can see how that would scare the academy students. That's fine, as long as it doesn't get in the way of him tutoring whoever he wants one-on-one."
"I understand he's still regularly tutoring Miss Honoka. Moving on, you requested that I ask around the clan to see who may be interested in learning ninjutsu creation."
Hazō winced. He had been thinking of reaching out to Noda to see if she was willing to tutor someone in the clan.
Gaku noticed Hazō's hesitation and paused. After taking a moment, Hazō said, "Apologies. Continue."
"Yes, sir. Lord Reo was the only one to answer in the affirmative. Apparently, after his injury, he sought a teacher but couldn't find one as a clanless ninja. It appears he thinks this could be a very effective way to show his worth. He requested that I draw your attention to his skill in various ninjutsu, to his large chakra reserves, and to the fact that he has mastered multiple elements with access only to the barest of resources."
"I'm glad he's willing to try. He knows the dangers, correct?"
"They were presented part and parcel with the question."
Good. Can you arrange a tutor for him?"
"With respect, my lord, that may be an easier thing for you to do than I. To my understanding, many clans have experts in ninjutsu creation, and you have close access to the KEI as well. You would be better equipped to find the people you would need to negotiate, I believe."
Hazō nodded. "Sure. I set up a contract with a clan to strengthen relations, or maybe just ask Kei to find someone. Also, Mari contracted a hacker to make the wall technique. Maybe they would be willing?"
"You would know better than I, sir. Lord Atomu is still unaware of what exactly you want from him on the saltern project, would you care to clarify for him?"
"I'll sort that out eventually," Hazō said, scribbling a note. "It's not urgent. For now he can keep doing more of the same."
"Understood. Kenta wishes to speak with you about some construction on the estate. Shall I handle that for you?"
"Please do."
"Very well. Similarly, a few civilian graduates of the Gōketsu Education Department have requested loans to start businesses. Would you like me to summarize their proposals?"
Hazō shrugged. "You've already looked through them, right? For any proposals that seem reasonable, make the loan. Make the terms as generous as possible, we don't need to be predatory of our own people."
"Very well, my lord. I will note we need to find time to go over the clan's budgets and taxes at some point. Our wealth has recently risen thanks to the conclusion of the silk trades in the latter half of AMITY, but our expenses are rising as well. I wish to consult you on where we may find more income or cut expenses."
Hazō sighed. "I get that it's important, but not today, please. We're above water for now?"
"Yes, sir. We sold off many assets to dissolve our debts with the Hagoromo and Kurusu, but we have dissolved them. Our core expenses are small."
"Then it's not urgent. Anything else?"
"No, sir. I believe you missed many council votes. Lord Noburi will provide you with a summary, but I do not believe there was anything relevant to our interests."
"Good. Then, I have one thing for you, Gaku."
Gaku raised his brows. "Yes, my lord?"
"I've asked Asuma a couple of times to see the registry of seals that the Tower is selling. Did he ever send over that list?"
Gaku raised his hand to his chin in thought. "I recall sending several missives to the Tower with this request of yours, my lord. To my recollection, they haven't responded. Perhaps my contacts in the Tower are not highly placed enough to interact with the people that handle high-level ninja sealcrafting. I shall ask Lady Mari to check on this."
Hazō smiled. "Good idea, Gaku. Mari knows how to get things done."
"If that is all, my lord…?"
Hazō nodded. Gaku bowed and made his exit.
Hazō sat there for a moment longer, then pushed himself to his feet. He couldn't sit here forever with his thoughts spinning in circles. He needed to go find someone, maybe Akane, to talk about all this and see what, if anything, he could do about it.
o-o-o
Ten days later…
Hazō looked up from his armchair and mug of hot chocolate to see Mari slipping quietly into his study.
"Mari, hello! I haven't seen much of you around recently. How are things going?"
Mari smiled at him. "Hello Hazō. Just fine, thanks."
As she spoke, she walked around the room, activating various privacy seals, finishing with placing down one of their extremely limited supply of anti-Byakugan seals on the desk at the center of the room. With the privacy seals set, she crossed the room and gently relaxed into the armchair across from Hazō.
"Is this related to the investigation? Found something to pin it on the Hyūga?" Hazō asked.
Mari shook her head. "Frankly, I've left Haru in charge of that. It'll be a learning experience for him, but it is the first big intelligence operation that I'm leaving to him, so you should expect some rough edges. We've already talked with a few of the actor groups, but our opponent isn't an idiot that would hire their patsies while wearing a clan crest. The groups were hired by what seemed like a wealthy daimyo who offered them a generous payout for putting on a few performances of a script apparently drafted by a different playwright under the daimyo's patronage."
Mari sighed. "There were a few good months after the disguise kit shortage where these trails were much easier to follow. Now, it seems like everyone's gotten used to using the new style of kit."
"Okay," Hazō said, "so you don't think it's going to be a big deal?"
Mari shrugged. "I didn't say that. The civilians still love you, and the clanless ninja's opinion isn't really going to shift too much, so I figure this is aimed at the clans. Sure, they're not the people that are actually watching the street plays, but every clan has low-level intelligence gathering in the village to make sure they're not caught unaware by new happenings. Their people hear about the plays and report it up the chain to the ninja. For example, there was another play going around about the exploits of various summoners during the war, which left a notable gap for you. Civilians might not notice, but every ninja in Leaf was there when Asuma announced the Will of Fire Contest, and they'll remember that you were awarded the Dog Scroll in order to do missions for Leaf."
Hazō frowned. "It sounds like they have some pretty powerful dirt on us."
"Yeah. And they're wielding it subtly and through many layers of indirection, only bringing true-if-misleading facts to people in power through their own intelligence agents. It's a legitimately well-executed plot, if I'm being honest."
"Then why aren't you working on it?" Hazō asked.
"Well," Mari said, ticking off on her fingers. "One, there's only so much Haru can learn from working on little baby problems I make up for him. Thinking about and modeling other agents in a clan-critical environment will be way better for training him up than years of coddling lessons. Two, I'm not really a spymaster. Sure, I'm doing my best, which is still damn good by the way, but I was always the agent that retrieved the intel, not the person that took information from a dozen disagreeing sources and found the patterns that tied them together. And three, I spend most of my effort on counterespionage these days."
"Counterespionage? What big secrets are we trying to keep?" Hazō asked.
Mari raised an eyebrow. Hazō blushed slightly. "Ah," he said.
Hazō looked back at the anti-Byakugan seal. "Is someone trying to find out about… WHOOSH?" he asked, making the same gesture of a bird taking off, rising slowly at first then quickly. Of the clan, he, Akane, Kei, and Mari were using Shadow Clone with Hazō's method to improve their rate of power growth. Apart from Mari, who didn't share her training with anyone, everyone was approaching their innate limits of mental endurance. Hazō suspected that by now, all of them could handle more clone-hours than even seasoned jounin.
Mari shook her head. "No one is investigating us specifically, but that's partly because I'm putting so much effort into keeping us under the radar. You've noticed that we're still buying chakra even with the koi pond active, right? I've been arranging to keep the rate of construction on the estate steady and for Noburi to practice 'discreetly' with his big flashy Water Dragon ninjutsu, and I didn't want to cut off all the purchasing on the same day that the piscist took a vacation. Of course, if you want, we can taper off the purchasing over time or find another place to spend the chakra.
"Anyway, that's just one example. I'm doing that all over Hidden Leaf. Hundreds of little nudges to keep the idea out of people's minds, to gently redirect their inquiries that might find dangerous answers, and to give them alternate explanations for the truth right in front of them."
"Got it," Hazō said. "No complaints here, that does seem pretty important to get right."
Mari grimaced. "Even so, we're on a timer as long as Noburi is refueling jounin for their training. If Asuma hands Shadow Clone to a clanless jounin that knows about our chakra-refueling services and actually has the money to pay for it, it won't take long for them to figure the whole thing out. Clanless, of course, because clan ninja wouldn't stoop to admit that our services could help them train. I've been jacking up Noburi's price little by little to make that less likely, but that just increases the time it'll take for it to happen.
"By the way, that's another reason to just let the plays be. Sure, it alienates us from the other clans, but Asuma himself understands why you weren't fighting in the war and doesn't hold you ill will over it. The plays are far from an existential threat, and keeping the clans at a distance keeps any of their Shadow Clone users from stumbling across our secret in a way that I can't possibly prevent."
Hazō nodded slowly. "Well, if I have any ideas on how to keep the secret better, I'll let you know. Is that what you needed me for?"
Mari shrugged. "It's a thing I wanted to mention to you. I'm really here because you wanted to buy seals from the Tower."
"Yes," Hazō said. "During the Neck mission, MARS proved invaluable for mass use of seals in combat. If anything, we didn't have enough seals. The other Leaf sealmasters definitely have combat seals we could use. Adding them to the MARS chains could multiply our combat strength. Gaku mentioned that the Tower officials stonewalled him. Did you have any success?"
"Sort of. I managed to speak with Sarutobi Fumi, the senior Sarutobi sealmaster."
"Yes, I'm familiar," Hazō said. "She was one of the more… moderating influences when we were trying to decipher the Great Seal replica."
"Sure," Mari said, turning her finger in a circle to move on. "Well, she does the Tower's seal stuff. Apparently, Asuma thinks you're slacking on skywalkers. She's happy to send the list of seals for sale if you learn skywalkers, demonstrate you can make them, and start paying the tax of a hundred per month. I think they really want to replenish their strategic reserve after the war burned through it."
Hazō grimaced. "That's a lot of time commitment. I like letting Kagome's students handle the explosive-storage-alarm tax." Hazō thought for a moment. "I could ask Kagome to do my skywalker tax, but his time is pretty valuable too. Ugh."
"Well," Mari said, "I'll leave it up to you. Though Asuma may find another way to pressure you if this isn't enough."
"Got it. Well, see if you can find a way to get a peek at the lists. There aren't that many sealmasters in Leaf that make seals that aren't explosives or storage seals, and probably even fewer that will sell those seals to the Tower with the risk of someone else reverse engineering them. If there's nothing too good on the lists, we can skip it for now."
"Sure, I'll try when I get a chance," Mari said, shrugging. "No promises, though."
"Thank you, Mari."
Hazō and Mari sat in silence for a moment. Hazō sipped his hot chocolate as a vague intuition slowly formed in his mind, telling him that Mari was waiting to say something.
Hazō glanced at her and smiled, but kept sipping his drink. Mari's own coaching guided him: be friendly and courteous, give them space to arrange their thoughts, and let them speak on their own time. Sure, Mari could read him like a book and definitely knew his full intentions, but he figured it was the thought that counted.
"By the way, Hazō," she said lightly, "I've had a bit of a… conundrum, lately. It's no big deal, and I'm sure I'll figure out something for it, but I know you sometimes have creative solutions to things, so…"
"Sure, glad to help," Hazō said, leaning forward in his chair. "What's the problem?"
Mari shifted uncomfortably in her chair for a moment, then met Hazō's eyes. "I…" she cut herself off. "Do you feel better now, since your trip to the Basement?"
Hazō nodded. "Yeah. Spent a while with Akane and Ino, made some progress on the jinchūriki seals, and started sorting through the notes Orochimaru gave me. It feels like he just scraped a stack of disorganized documents off the top of his desk and shoved it in a storage seal."
"Do you feel mentally ready to talk about a hard topic?" Mari asked.
"Sure," Hazō said. "I can handle it."
Mari nodded and exhaled through her nose. Finally, she said, "It's been a long time, but I want to start making genjutsu again."
"That's good," he said, then he frowned. "Wait, is this going to be a big problem? Sealing failures are awful and I've heard horror stories about technique hacking failures. What are genjutsu failures like? Do you make heads explode? Do you leave people as mindbroken catatonic husks? Does it do those things to you?"
Mari laughed. "No, Hazō. If miscasting a genjutsu could make people's heads blow up or shatter their mind and send them into a coma, it wouldn't be called miscasting. Genjutsu users would all just do that, and it would save us a lot of trouble. No, genjutsu design is not innately dangerous to the people you test on. They experience the genjutsu, I alter the details, they experience it again, and I repeat until I have a ready-to-go package of experiences."
"So, you need me to arrange testers?" Hazō asked. "That doesn't sound so bad. Do they need to be ninja?"
Mari shook her head. "No, civilians work fine. But Hazō, the process of testing genjutsu is not innately dangerous. That said, the genjutsu themselves… those can be dangerous."
Hazō frowned. "Like the Hell Viewing Technique and your other combat genjutsu?"
Mari nodded. "That's right. They won't kill you, but combat genjutsu are usually just torture genjutsu. They're tools meant to overwhelm and break an opponent's mind as fast as possible so you can get out of the vulnerable state you're in while channeling a domination genjutsu and kill them while they're too mentally broken to fight back.
"Even designing a torture genjutsu is uncomfortable. You need to remember all the physical experiences you're going to inflict on them, and fully feel the powerlessness that you're going to pound into the target's psyche – and that's awful even when you're doing it voluntarily. I repeatedly exposed those people I tested on to what I was trying very, very hard to make the worst experience of their lives.
"Now, in Mist, finding test targets was easy enough. Yagura was glad to provide a steady supply of dissidents to the few of us that actually made new genjutsu, and he didn't particularly care what state they were in once we were done. Some of my genjutsu were honestly half motivated by not wanting to torture people on a given day. The Sunny Day genjutsu, apart from being incredibly useful in the field, and by field I mean bed, is also probably the nicest possible experience a genjutsu practice dummy has ever had.
"The dissidents we practiced on… some of the other ninja enjoyed torturing them for violating Yagura's rule. They would keep them around for weeks or months, long past the point they had mentally given in and it was no longer useful to practice genjutsu on them. I never did that though. I always put them out of their misery when I was done with them."
Hazō kept quiet for several long moments. He couldn't find a way to respond. "Mari… Why do you need to design torture genjutsu?"
Mari laughed again, but this time it felt oddly colder. "Hazō, illusions are useful in a fight for misleading and confusing the enemy, but they don't compare with the complete control of your target's senses that a total mind control offers. It's incredibly powerful, but it leaves you vulnerable while you're doing it. You need to incapacitate them as fast as possible. How do you mentally incapacitate someone so that they don't just kill you while you're recovering from the genjutsu trance when you drop it? You give them an experience so strong, so intensely awful that it worms its way into their mind. Even freed from the genjutsu, they can't escape the torture.
She read the thoughts off of Hazō's face. "Yes, you're right that a seduction genjutsu would be mentally compelling too. But in practice, when a ninja escapes a seduction genjutsu, they remember that they're fighting for their lives, that their heart is beating a million times a minute, and that the person across from them just cast a genjutsu on them. It's disorienting, but not incapacitating.
"Trust me. With the degree of control I have in a total domination genjutsu, I've created levels of pain and suffering that left even hardened jounin crying in the mud until I slit their throats."
Hazō realized Mari's intention and felt a pressure start to rise in his chest. He took a deep breath, noting the faint raggedness in it. His throat wasn't closing up, even if it felt like it.
"Mari," he said, "couldn't you practice on me? I'm fairly sure my mental resilience is stronger than most jounin, and I've experienced painful things, things from outside this reality. Hells, you've even practiced on me before. I can handle your genjutsu."
Mari shook her head, sadly. "I've experienced a lot of… bad things in my life, Hazō. When I designed my Special Hell technique, I took all those bad things I'd had happen to me and compressed it into a single perfect mindspike. You can handle pain, sure. You might even be able to walk away from the Special Hell technique, though I doubt it. Could you handle it for hours? For days? And then, I might need to design more than one combat ninjutsu."
Mari pointed at herself. "I can stand under the burden of the suffering in my life because it didn't happen all at once. I don't know if I would have survived otherwise. Do you really think you could withstand the entire weight of all the pain I've ever felt without even the slightest crack? Because if you give even a little, you will break."
"No," Hazō said. "Mari, we can't-"
Mari raised her hand. "I get it. I absolutely, totally, one hundred percent get it. We will not start up our own version of the Final Gift Program, taking elderly and crippled civilians for genjutsu design. After everything I've been through, I would rather die than go back to… that."
Hazō nodded and let the tension in his chest relax.
They sat for several long minutes, sitting in their chairs and gazing into the distance. Hazō's hot chocolate had long since cooled.
"Mari," Hazō said. "What are you going to do?"
Mari shrugged, pasting on a smile that Hazō knew was fake even if he couldn't see its seams. "I dunno. I'll figure it out, I always do. Just let me know if you have any bright ideas, alright?"
Hazō nodded and Mari glided to her feet. She deactivated the anti-Byakugan seal and the remainder of the privacy seals, then gave Hazō a nod.
"Thank you, Hazō."
"I didn't do anything, Mari."
Mari smiled again, but this one seemed sad. "Sometimes, there's nothing you can do. When there's no other choice… isn't that enough?"
She left the room in a swirl of elegant robes, leaving Hazō with only his thoughts.
Kumokōgō had no complaints about you bringing in another powerful summoner and sealmaster to help with the Great Seal. In fact, she is anxious for progress on the sealing side – while you have killed a Dragon and taken steps to slow the degradation of the Great Seal, there has as-yet been nothing done to actually repair it.
Sealing Research:
TNs:
Calligraphy: ??
Sealing: ?? (reduced by Kagome's active assistance, who has already learned the seal)
Hazō has made substantial progress on the first of Minato's seals. The chakra construct created by the seal is very different from anything Hazō has done before, but he's beginning to wrap his head around it. He thinks he's perhaps a quarter of the way done, and he thinks that future seals in the chain, once he's really understood this first one, will take less time to learn (even if they're more challenging).
When Hazō asked Ino for a telescope, she asked "What's a telescope?" Hazō explained and she said she'd look into it at some point.
Hazō has spent several days combing through Orochimaru's notes. While the previous files he gave you were neatly organized, the contents of his new storage seals are not. Orochimaru seems to be using Hazō as a convenient way to do some spring cleaning of his old documents. While being used as a trash bin is insulting, the contents of Orochimaru's trash bin are quite valuable in themselves.
[the contents of Orochimaru's notes will be edited in here once we've actually decided what all is in them]
Timeline for this update:
Day 1: Unwinding from the Orochimaru experience, meeting with Ino, Kumokōgō, etc.
Days 2-7: prep for infusion
Day 8: infusion
Day 9-10: unable to do much useful with the SSA headache, Hazō organizes Orochimaru's notes.
XP Award: 23 + 10 (brevity) XP
GM-fun Award: 2 XP (The plan was not particularly good. It was largely offscreenable, hence the low base XP. However, I did enjoy writing the Mari scene.)
Hazō had discovered one of Central Fire's little secrets a couple of months ago, stumbling into it by sheer blind luck as he fled from a gleeful Kei (whose eyes had lit up with the fires of Naraka itself when he asked her for projectile evasion training). Not far from Leaf's walls, there lay a grassy knoll concealed by an array of maple trees that were too perfectly spread to possibly have grown there naturally, their expansive branches and dense layers of leaves offering privacy from prying eyes while at the same time granting a unique panorama of the village to those prepared to stand or sit in just the right place (and you could probably see all sorts of interesting things if you brought a telescope; it was a shame no such thing existed). According to Ino, in Leaf tree language the maple represented stability, balance, and serenity, making it an ideal place to spend time with Ami.
This afternoon, it had taken a little time to escape Gaku, who was developing a ninja-like sensitivity to when his lord was attempting to flee the compound while there was still important work to do. It had left Hazō fashionably late, and it turned out that there was significance to him being fashionably late, because otherwise he'd never have witnessed this.
Ami was dancing. Clad in a billowing blue and white sundress, complete with a straw hat, she was spinning around barefoot on the grass in a fashion that was either strikingly innocent, perfectly calculated to be strikingly innocent, or one of those veteran I&S things where you could be both at the same time because your body had forgotten how to move without deliberate effect. If it was the latter, an Iron Nerve wielder was hardly in a position to criticise.
Just standing there and watching her dance, while oddly tempting in its own way, seemed like it would be weird, and also guaranteed to get him teased afterwards, so he decided to come over and get her attention (noting, in the process, a white blanket and picnic basket sitting on standby).
Ami tags "Hazō Should Have Seen Something Like This Coming, But Fortunately Didn't"
Ami: Athletics ?? + ? + ? = ??
Hazō: Athletics 40 - 3 = 37
Ami wins.
Before Hazō could politely refuse, Ami snatched his hands and pulled him into a spin (naturally, he stayed on his feet even when surprised and off-balance because he was a skilled ninja who could rapidly adapt to any situation).
Step. Step. Spin. Step. Twist.
For a moment, Hazō wondered whether the best move was to disengage from this tomfoolery (she wasn't holding him that tight) and avoid setting the precedent that clan heads were to be randomly grabbed whenever Ami felt like it.
Then he got over himself. Gōketsu Hazō was not a man of ego. No, he would show her he could match her step for step, because he was about 30% a taijutsu specialist and had thus honed control over his body to a fine art.
Ami was laughing. Caught up in the moment, he grinned back.
Gradually, the randomness of the dance began to resolve itself into something regular. Hazō hadn't been able to put words around it the one time he'd tried to explain it to Kei, and honestly, he still couldn't, but there was something that happened to him that he thought was an Iron Nerve thing because he'd never heard anyone else mention it. When he found himself repeating the same movements without aiming to, when passive Iron Nerve recording layered over itself again and again in quick succession, it was… like feeling air currents with his fingertips. No, like standing in pulsating ocean waves. No, like reaching out to grasp déjà vu. No, like…
It was no good. He still couldn't do it. But the point was that it triggered something inside him that other things didn't, and it was being triggered now. Ami wasn't just messing around. Or rather, she was, but she was also drawing an elaborate pattern on the ground, something Hazō couldn't visualise while he was still in mid-dance.
Then she finally let go for real, and instead of stumbling as the leftover momentum carried him away, Gōketsu Hazō set his feet like this and this, and swept into an elegant Isanese bow (which he'd picked up from Noburi purely because it looked cool).
Ami curtsied.
"Milord is very light on his feet, it would seem."
"And milady continues to be an ambush predator."
She beckoned him towards the blanket.
"I spent the last week being rained on in Cloud," she said, "followed by being rained on some more on my journey back, so if I get to Leaf to find that it's perfect picnic weather, then by Byakuren's hefty mast, I'm going to have a picnic. Unless you have a better idea?"
"A picnic is fine with me," Hazō said.
"You want to know the irony of it all?" Ami asked, reaching for the picnic basket. "I was only in Cloud when the thunderstorms hit because I managed to talk my way out of having to visit Rain."
"Rain?"
"Yeah," Ami said. "You know how Akatsuki sort of split up into small groups after Nagi Island, and mostly kept to themselves with only the occasional massacre? I guess I ended that. Oops."
"Oops?" Hazō repeated, as if Ami hadn't just confessed to recreating the most powerful destructive force known to man.
"I guess I could upgrade it to a 'yikes'," Ami said. "But there's a sense in which it's a good thing. Pain's vision of peace was what kept them together in the first place—somehow—so if they've reunited, that suggests they're taking my attempt at world peace seriously. We need that, or AMITY risks falling apart the first time somebody defects, which they will because people. But on lighter topics!"
"Oh, I've got one," Hazō said as she began to unpack mysterious sandwiches. "How do you feel about Gōketsu-style shaved ice?"
"I would love some," Ami said. "What's Gōketsu-style shaved ice?"
Hazō brought out the storage seal.
"The ice is all water from the air of the Gōketsu compound, made by Noburi using his Condense Water cantrip for just such an occasion." Albeit yesterday rather than last winter, thanks to Elemental Mastery. "Kei researched the recipe, and Akane shaved the ice. The syrup is a Yuno special, though we had to swap out a couple of ingredients for Fire ones, and I made this magnificent quartz bowl and spoon myself."
Ami sat very still and just stared at the dessert.
"It's yours if you want it, Ami," Hazō said gently. "Just reach out and take it."
There was silence, and Hazō could hear the maple leaves rustling in the summer breeze.
Slowly, Ami reached out and took the bowl and spoon.
She took a bite, and Hazō let out a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding.
"Mmm. My compliments to the chefs," Ami said in the voice of an Ami being perfectly casual and laid-back. "If you ever feel like getting away from all this madness, I bet Frost Country will welcome you with open arms."
"You realise that soliciting a Leaf ninja to go missing is unquestionably treason, right?"
"Peer pressure's a terrible thing," Ami said with a grin. "It's appalling what some people will do to fit in."
Hazō rolled his eyes. "I did have something else for you, but I'm already starting to wonder if I'm going to need it more than you do."
"Do tell."
Hazō pulled out the flask. "Willowbark tea. You said you got headaches sometimes."
"I have my own, thanks," Ami said. "Besides, I plan for them in advance. But I do appreciate the gesture. It's really sweet of you—much like the shaved ice. I would ask Yuno for the recipe, but I don't think I have any assassination missions coming up.
"So how was your trip to the eastern continent? Noburi said he couldn't tell me what it was, but he didn't direct me to the Tower, so I assume it was a clan thing? Summoning scroll, forbidden lore, hobnobbing with more Akatsuki? No, scratch that last one, Hidan's on the mainland."
Hazō was vaguely aware that he was on a Hidan timer: one of these days, his self-proclaimed religious superior would turn up to see him, and he didn't care if Hazō was outed as a Jashin worshipper in front of the entirety of Leaf.
(Was Hazō a Jashin worshipper? Or, perhaps more importantly, did Jashin consider him one?)
"No comment," Hazō said. The odds of Ami sending somebody after the Squirrel Scroll, or going after it herself, were pretty low, and the odds of her succeeding where he'd failed were lower still. He still wasn't going to bet against her if he could possibly avoid it.
"We did have quite an adventure on the way back, though," Hazō said. "So back when I was lending Orochimaru the Dragon parts for research, one of the things he paid me with—"
"Hold the ravenous chakra sheep," Ami interrupted. "You've been doing what to the what now?"
"Lending Orochimaru the Dragon parts for research," Hazō said. "We need countermeasures, and he's the only person in Leaf with a decent chance of using the parts to figure something out. Also, they're incredibly valuable to him and pretty much nobody else, and we've been getting great deals out of it."
Ami put down the sandwich she'd been in the middle of eating. "Hazō, Orochimaru's research is how he made himself an unkillable, terrifying monster. At least with the FGP, he'd have kidnapped somebody anyway. Now you're giving him access to levels of power that make summon bosses run and hide?"
Hazō was forced to admit that wasn't an angle he'd considered—though, thinking about it, he wasn't sure if it would have stopped him. An invincible Orochimaru in the future was still better than unstoppable Dragons now.
"It's a moot point now anyway," he said. "I decided to sell him the parts, and I doubt he'd give them back if I asked."
"Welp," Ami said, "I guess that's a new apocalypse scenario to add to my collection. Anything else you want to get off your chest while I ponder how to convince Kei to flee to another continent with me?"
"Actually, yeah," Hazō said. "Since we're on the subject of Orochimaru… I've seen the Final Gift Programme with my own eyes now. One of the things I bargained for the parts was answers to some questions, and he made me assist with a vivisection while we talked."
Ami winced. "No wonder there's a shadow hanging over you. The first one's always the worst."
"Wait, what?"
"Every kink under the sun."
Hazō reeled as his imagination fired up things he absolutely did not want it to fire up, and asked questions to which he would pay not to know the answers. Dressing dripped out of the half-eaten sandwich in his hand and he didn't even notice until a few seconds later.
"Just kidding," Ami said with a wink. "No, there was this biosealer I had to seduce when I was around your age. He was plotting against Yagura—thought he could disrupt the jinchūriki seal and leave him powerless long enough for a dagger in the back—and we needed to know who was backing him, but Mist policy is not to take biosealers into T&I if you can avoid it; they have a nasty habit of implanting themselves with explosive suicide seals and other fun surprises. Buuut the guy was a crazy hermit, like a lot of biosealers, so I couldn't just get him drunk in a bar. I had to weasel my way into getting hired as an assistant. Long story short, he gave me education in anatomy that most people would pay a mint to get. Or maybe pay a mint not to get, depending on how you look at it."
Hazō shuddered.
"Were you at all tempted to just let him do his thing? Yagura getting assassinated seems like it would have been a dream come true."
Ami shrugged. "I won't pretend I didn't think about it. But there were all sorts of reasons why it would've been a bad idea, and the big one was that he turned out to be backed by Leaf, which would've rolled in and conquered us the second Yagura went down.
"The story has a happy ending, though. You know creativity isn't a Mori speciality, but once I asked myself 'What would Mari-sensei do?', the answer came practically by itself. He had a bunch of civilian kids in a cellar, because apparently creating artificial ninja is a philosopher's stone of biosealing. I just tied him to his own operating table, laid the tools out in front of the kids, told them to go wild, and walked away. Yagura was pissed with me for not staying to make sure he was dead, but he also thought egregious cruelty in executing a traitor showed I was ideologically sound. He went light on the punishment—for Yagura, anyway—and in the long run it probably contributed to my jōnin promotion."
"Wait," Hazō said. "Wasn't the whole point of not torturing him that he might have had an explosive suicide seal?"
"Those kids weren't going to live long anyway after what he did to them," Ami said. "Worst-case scenario, at least they'd die smiling.
"But enough of my trip down memory lane. You're the one with fresh trauma to talk through."
"…yeah." Hazō fell silent for a second as the images bubbled up, followed closely by the sounds. Noda's missing leg. Her blank eyes. Her helpless, ever quieter whimpers.
"Did you know Noda Kaiyo?" he asked.
Ami shook her head. "She was KEI, so I'd have been a failure as a Mori if I didn't have her dossier memorised, but no, not personally. She didn't come to KEI meetings or sign up for the Network or make voluntary contributions or anything like that. She just lived her life, until I guess she didn't. I knew her fiancé, if that helps."
"She had a fiancé?!"
"Mmm," Ami said. "Troubled kid, with circumstances, but nice. They got engaged not long before the war. I thought they were rushing it, personally, but then again, they never got to marry, so maybe they weren't rushing enough. I guess she signed up to the FGP for his sake while I was away."
"I tried to help her once," Hazō said quietly. "She was on the adoption shortlist, but she refused. She caught my attention as a ninjutsu developer, because it's a rare skill and the Gōketsu don't have it, but after meeting her, I also thought we could be a found family for her. I could see her rejecting connections with other people, and I thought this might be her second chance. Maybe that's arrogant, but I just saw somebody in front of me and wanted to help her. I should have tried harder."
"You can't help somebody who doesn't want to be helped, Hazō," Ami said. "It's one of the most basic truths. If you offered her a found family, and she didn't want one, or she was on the edge but didn't dare take the step, or she couldn't even admit that the step was there, that wasn't something you had the power to change. You can't save somebody who denies that they need saving, Hazō. All you can do is choose either to watch or to walk away."
And Hazō had walked away.
"I know I can't save everyone," Hazō said. "I'm not omnipotent. My hands only reach so far. But I hoped… I hoped she'd at least meet a better end than that. She deserved a better end than that. She survived the Great Collapse. She survived the war. Apparently she even found love. Somebody like that deserves better than to just waltz into Orochimaru's lair to be tortured to death. With my help."
"I don't think the world runs off 'deserve'," Ami said. "Nobody rewards the virtuous. Nobody punishes the sinful. It's a sweet delusion to believe that there's a balance waiting to be restored. It also implies that there's somebody out there who does deserve to be tortured to death by Orochimaru. I don't think you believe that, no matter what you might think in moments of rage."
Hazō wondered about that. He thought about Lord Hagoromo, who was willing to ruin the lives of dozens of innocents just so he could feel good about his own moral purity. He thought about Yagura, who trampled the spirits of an entire village in his personal quest for a cold perfection. He thought about Hidan, who laughed as he butchered human beings just like himself on a geographical scale.
But then he saw Noda, immobilised, vomiting up monstrosities while her gaze was filled with a despair so distilled you could barely tell it apart from emptiness.
Hazō did not want to be the one judging who did and didn't deserve that fate. That was a burden too heavy for anybody with a soul.
Once it floated up, the image didn't go away. The slug thing… somehow that was the worst. Even Orochimaru cutting into Noda with a scalpel didn't have the same sense of violation of her human dignity, like she was less than a person, less than an animal, just... a substrate.
He hadn't talked to the others about what he'd experienced, not in any detail. They couldn't turn back time. They couldn't make it right. It would only hurt them. He didn't want them to feel even a shadow of what he'd felt at the time. For Noburi and Akane, and in a way even Kagome-sensei, who could be both grimly cynical and eerily innocent by turns, it was a darkness they should never touch if they didn't have to. For Mari and Yuno, it was a darkness they shouldn't be reminded of while they were still turning towards the light. For Kei… he would never tell Kei what had so nearly been done to her.
But Ami… Ami knew.
"It was the inhumanity." His voice came out low, like he both wanted and didn't want her to hear. "She was just lying there, not saying anything, not fighting back. Just a few whimpers. There was some kind of creature inside her, and she vomited it up, and nothing. He cut into her, and nothing. I handed him a bonesaw, for sawing through bone. Did he do something to her, before? Had she just given up? If she'd just screamed, it would've made sense. It would've been a horror that made sense. But she looked at me and didn't know who I was. She just let it happen. I saw her scared of him, it wasn't like she was unconscious, but he treated her like a body and she acted like a body. I know she signed up for it, but she should've fought. Fighting is instinct. You have to fight. But she just whimpered, and then she stopped because I made her. Why didn't she fight back when he was cutting her apart like meat at the butcher's?"
Ami listened silently.
"I saw her, and I felt sick, and at the same time I was this cold person who asked Orochimaru questions because they needed to be asked, and let him stand there and violate her because he was Orochimaru and I was just the child snatching scraps from his table, and every other minute I was scared because I thought he was going to hurt me, but I was never scared for her because I'd just accepted that she was dead. I accepted it, and there is still that part of me that knows it's hopeless and I can't fight him, and I should go about my daily business while he gets the next Noda prepped for surgery, and I should be in pain but I'm not!"
At some point, Ami had shifted over to sit next to him.
"I hate it!" he spat. "I hate that I am in this world where it's the right thing to do. I hate that all I can do is make plans and move pieces around a shogi board and whenever I'm faced with real evil I bow down just because it's strong and I'm weak! I hate that my strength is my intellect and I can't even come up with anything that trumps the Final Gift Programme that does this! I hate that we need Orochimaru, and we need his strength, when just knowing he exists is poison, and letting him exist is poison, and every minute I do it, it's like he's inside my veins. I'm just like Noda, lying there and not fighting back while he sinks his fangs in me, only I'm supposed to have a choice!"
"Yeah," Ami said softly. "I know."
Hazō hadn't even noticed that his hands were gripping the sheet in front of him.
Ami put an arm around his shoulder as he looked down at those hands and that sheet.
"It was the same with Nashi. I felt so powerless, standing there and doing everything I could to help him because the mission came first, and I needed him to be satisfied so he'd let down his guard. I screamed at the kids in my head. Part of me hated them, for not fighting back, for letting themselves get caught, for being the reason I was doing this. Even though I knew how absurd that was. I should have been hating him, and only him, but it was like… it was like he was an animal. No matter how monstrous he was, I was the one with free will. I was the one choosing to enable him. And even as I stood there, I knew I'd keep doing it, because it was what the mission demanded. I'd serve him faithfully, and then I'd sleep with him and hope this was the night he slipped up and gave me what I needed. And every morning, I'd know that if I'd only been better at seduction, today would have been the last day.
"After a while, the horror is just… more horror. I can promise you that much. The Ami before that mission probably couldn't have made the Final Gift Programme—and then she'd have been devoured, and everyone else would be living in the world Orochimaru created instead of a compromise that makes some things better.
"The first time is the hardest. And slowly, you learn to contextualise the things you have to do, and you learn to make peace with the part of yourself that knows it's necessary to do them. You never want the pain to go down to zero, because once you lose your humanity there's no way to get it back, but you can learn to put things in the right boxes without having to drown in them or throw them away.
"It probably won't work for you the way it worked for me, because that would require you to be insane in the exact same way I'm insane, but I know you of all people can do it. Besides, you have one enormous advantage I didn't."
Hazō looked up at her questioningly.
"Me."
Hazō's first thought was that of course Ami had had Ami, by definition, but on reflection, he wasn't so sure.
Ami lifted her arm off his shoulders and moved around to face him.
"The other thing is… Orochimaru tried to kill Kei. I hate him more for that than a normal person is capable of hating anybody. I will smile and nod at him for as long as I have to, but one day I will kill him with the power you promised me, with your help if you'll give it, and on that day the Final Gift Programme will be ash."
There was no jōnin aura. No ice. Hazō didn't know what to make of it.
While Hazō was still processing this, she moved back and gave a traditional Ami smirk. "Look at me, being all treasonous. It's lucky ANBU's been left so understaffed and I am—depressingly—one of Leaf's more experienced jōnin. So treason away, Hazō! You're safe from everyone but me while I'm around."
"I think," Hazō said, "if the Hokage actually considered people wanting to kill Orochimaru to be treason, Leaf would have run out of killboxes by now.
"But thank you, Ami. That… helps."
"Any time," Ami said. "Except in front of other people, because that would be embarrassing."
"Yes, Ami," Hazō said. "You are so well-known for being easily embarrassed."
"I'm a regular shrinking violet," Ami agreed. "Why, just being in the presence of a boy is making me want to run away and hide."
"Oh, yeah," Hazō remembered. "Orochimaru seemed to think we were engaged. Is there anything you'd like to tell me?"
Ami gave him a look of the purest innocence, which might even have worked if she wasn't Ami. (Hazō wasn't sure how that worked, given that Ami's exceptional social skills were one of her primary features.)
"You mean other than that we're engaged?"
Hazō slowly and demonstratively brought the flask of willowbark tea out and took a swig.
"Ami, we are not engaged. That would have required somebody to propose, and I am confident that hasn't happened."
"Are you sure?" Ami asked. "Because you did—"
Hazō held up his hand. "Ami, if I were to propose to you, it would be a mindblowing, unforgettable experience that would sweep you completely off your feet and leave you daydreaming about me and our upcoming wedding every spare minute of the day. I am confident that I haven't done anything like that. Ergo, we are not engaged."
"Mmm," Ami said thoughtfully. "Now I feel shortchanged by your actual proposal."
"What actual proposal?"
"A funny thing happened shortly after the end of the war," Ami said. "I was visiting the temporary barracks where the Isan ninja were being stationed, and I had my hair in that lovely braid you taught me…"
Ah, crap.
"And wouldn't you know, it turns out that's a triple double Isanese braid. They were so freaked out. And then one of them kindly explained to me that it means 'I am an unmarried woman between 18 and 26 who was born under the star of chaos, and will give myself only to a man who can overwhelm me in a duel of wits', which is amazingly specific for a hairstyle. And I kindly explained to him that you gave me this braid and then immediately overwhelmed me in a duel of wits. Or whelmed me to a draw, anyway.
"Given that Kabuto visited the Isanese contingent a whole bunch of times before they left—them having no medical ninjutsu and him wanting to secretly check them for Bloodline Limits—I'm really not surprised it got as far as it did.
"So, lover boy, when's the wedding?"
All right. Apparently this one was entirely on him.
"Ami," he began, "me braiding your hair like that was a prank, and it was in no way meant to constitute a proposal."
"Ah, I get it," Ami said. "You picked the specific phrasing because you want me to give myself to you without marriage, leaving the position free for Akane or Ino or whoever's next on the list. That certainly would explain this hidden spot away from both Leaf and your compound. As ways to acquire a mistress without tipping off any of your legitimate lovers go, full points for creativity. Zero points for effectiveness, though—I wonder how far the rumour's spread in the time we've both been away."
"No, Ami, that wasn't—"
Then Hazō had what was either a brilliant or a terrible idea. No, it was almost certainly a terrible idea. But, sealmaster that he was, now that he'd thought of it, it was impossible for him not to try it.
"Yes, Ami," he declared, "that was in fact a proposal of marriage."
"Oh?"
"However," Hazō went on, emboldened by the fact that the world hadn't ended with those words, "it was conditional on my victory in the duel of wits. But I did not win, so it is impossible for you to have accepted my proposal."
"Mmm?"
"Nor did I lose, so it is impossible for you to have rejected it."
"Ah."
"In fact," Hazō concluded, "because of the draw, we now exist in a perfect suspended state of demi-proposal, and for as long as it is unresolved, it is physically impossible for anything I say or do to count as me proposing to you."
"Bravo, Hazō." Ami actually clapped. "Now that's the kind of intellectual tour de force I expect from my demi-fiancé."
"Thank you, thank you," Hazō said. "I trust there are no further complaints?"
"None at all," Ami said. "I can honestly say you've beaten me this time. In fact, one might say you've overwhelmed me in a duel of wits."
"Ah, crap."
-o-
You have received 4 + 1 (Brevity) + 1 (Fun-to-write) = 6 XP.
-o-
You have successfully completed research on the skywalker seal. You have not had time to start a new project.
"To the Dog Summoner I give greetings," Kumoairashī said. The Empress's Herald, a title that had been created as the result of two solid hours of cultural exchange between Hazō and the Empress since humanity lacked a word corresponding directly to Kumoairashī's job, was one of the least disturbing members of the Arachnid Clan. She was small, about the size of a terrier. Instead of the bristly hair so common on other spiders, she had something closer to fur that shimmered in blues and greens. And, to literally put the bow on it, Kumoairashī insisted on wearing a yellow ribbon in a bow around her pedicel. It was large enough that the tails of the bow dragged on the ground unless Kumoairashī took care to stand up nice and tall.
"Greetings to you as well, Kumoairashī," Hazō said, yanking hard on the reins of his thoughts in order to stop them from bouncing off the walls of his skull. He had a sealing headache that was splitting his skull, he had just come from two hours of paperwork, and Ino had come by just as he was about to leave for the Seventh Path.
o-o-o-o
"Gaku, I'm ready for you!" Hazō called, not looking up from the stack of papers that he was whipping through. He was just about at the bottom and then would be able to leave for the Seventh Path with a clear conscience.
"Hey there, sexy."
Hazō looked up in surprise, because that was very much not the way Gaku usually responded to a summons.
Obviously, it was not Gaku leaning insouciantly on the doorjamb. His brain caught up and helpfully notified him that the voice had been Ino's, not Gaku's, and that was why he should not be surprised to see his blonde ladyfriend.
His blonde ladyfriend, who was wearing an asymmetrical dress comprised of layer upon layer of sheer silk, each of a slightly different shade on the blue/green spectrum, plus a few in yellows and reds to give accent, and some with sparkles embedded in the dye. It was perfectly modest, with more than enough layers to render it opaque, yet it allowed faint hints of light through such that Ino's smooth-muscled limbs and torso were haloed shadows. The cowl-neck bodice gave just a glimpse of womanly curves while showing only three fingerwidths below the points of her collarbones. The dress came to mid-thigh on the right and mid-calf on the left; Ino's dainty feet were wrapped in dressy slippers that could only be worn outdoors without being ruined if the wearer could use chakra repulsion to not quite touch the ground.
It took Hazō a solid two seconds to raise his eyes to Ino's face and notice the artfully messy waterfall of platinum hair tumbling over her right shoulder.
"Wow." The word escaped without his intent. He continued staring while looking for a better one.
She grinned. "That's what I was going for. Nice to know I haven't lost my touch."
Hazō blinked twice, then managed to get his brain working again. "Wow," he said again. "You look amazing. What's the occasion?"
One delicate eyebrow curved upwards. "Does it need to be an occasion when I come see my boyfriend?"
Hazō considered that one carefully. "I'm pretty sure the right answer is 'no'," he said after a moment. "Yet, somehow, the way you phrased that makes me feel like maybe it's a trick question."
"Excellent," she said, laughing. "Once again, nice to know I haven't lost my touch."
He stood up with a smile and moved to the door so he could take her in his arms and kiss her. She accepted the kiss gladly, looping her arms around his waist for balance as she pressed herself against him. When it finally ended she purred in contentment and leaned her head on his chest.
Hazō tipped his head so he could lay his cheek on top of her head. He stroked her hair and kept light pressure at the small of her back, enjoying the heat of her through the slippery layers of silk. The shattering, pounding pain of his sealing headache diminished slightly as he let his eyes fall closed and simply breathed in her scent. Peaches, as always, except with faint floral hints?
"Did you change your hair rinse?" he asked quietly, not opening his eyes.
She nodded, drawing a laugh from him as his head wobbled on hers. "I started adding rose petals. Do you like it?"
"I always like the way you smell," he said honestly.
She tutted her tongue and pushed herself back so she could make eye contact. "Tsk, tsk," she said, wagging a finger at him. "Hazō, you never tell a girl she smells. Girls are dainty, feminine creatures. We don't have a smell, we have a scent."
He rolled his eyes and pulled her gently back into the hug. "Fine," he murmured. "I always like the way you scent."
She laughed. "Also, just to head off future issues: girls also do not sweat. Horses and oxen sweat. Stinky boys perspire, dainty ladies such as myself and Akane glow."
"Huh," Hazō said, still not opening his eyes. "I guess that's why it was so bright on the training field the last time we sparred. I could barely open my eyes you were glowing so hard."
She thumped him lightly on the shoulder in pretend indignation, but her shaking shoulders gave the lie. "Beast. There's no reason to insult me just because I've never felt the need to pursue that stinky and glow-inducing punching that you're so fond of."
"You were picking it up fast," he said truthfully. "Have you sparred with Chōji?"
"Not really," she said. She pushed herself free of him with a sigh, laced her fingers in his and tugged him over to the sofa that he'd installed after she started semi-frequently surprising him at his office. She settled at the end and patted her lap. He obediently lay down, head in her lap, and let his eyes drift closed as she ran delicate fingertips over his face and then massaged circles on his temples.
"Sealing headache?" she asked quietly.
He nodded, keeping the motion small so as not to dislodge her soothing touch or make the pain in his head flare.
"Those worry me," she said, dragging her fingers back through his hair with firm pressure. He felt knots that he hadn't even been aware of unraveling in his shoulders and cheeks. "Kagome doesn't get those, does he? It's not a normal thing."
"No," Hazō said. "I've had some experiences...not exactly seal failures, but not exactly not seal failures either. When I make myself relive those experiences it lets me disassociate, gets me into a state where it's easier to visualize what the chakra is doing in the seal and what the most likely effects of a change will be. It hurts like anything for a couple days but it's worth it. Makes research a lot faster and a lot safer." That was so far removed from an accurate description that it was almost a lie, but it was the closest he could come to describing it to a non-sealmaster. Even most sealmasters would have had trouble understanding what it was like to have your mind and soul torn free of your body and forced through cracks in space and time until you could see the universe from behind and realize that it was nothing but a layer of paint on a truth so vastly larger that there were literally no words to capture the difference.
"You were saying that you don't spar with Chōji," he said, trying to distract her onto safer topics. "Why not?"
She bopped him lightly on the nose to show that she hadn't missed the deflection, but didn't object. "It's not time efficient," she said, shifting slightly so that she could get her hands under his neck to rub out the knots. Hazō groaned in relief.
"We are the Ino-Shika-Chō," she continued. "Each clan is formidable, and together we make something greater than the sum of our parts, but that requires that we each play our role on the team. I'm a Yamanaka; I fight with my mind and my soul, not with my fists. I'm never going to be a good enough physical combatant to beat a ninja who has focused on that. Working with you on taijutsu is more about getting some exercise and sharing a thing that you care a lot about." She chuckled slightly. "You get this look when you're doing kata, do you know that? Like the world has gone completely away and you're floating. It's beautiful."
He smiled in pleased embarrassment. "Thanks. You looked...determined."
"Hah. Yeah, that's probably about right. I enjoyed it, but it's never going to be a main focus of my training. I hope that's okay? I don't want you to feel..." She trailed off, groping for words.
He reached back and captured her wrist, bringing her hand up so that he could kiss her fingertips. He opened his eyes and smiled up at her. "It's fine, love. We each have our path. I don't expect you to walk mine."
She bent forward, lithe and limber as only a teenage ninja can be, and gave him a tiny kiss on the nose before straightening. "Good," she said, smiling. "Anyway, Chōji is the physical combatant on our team. Shika does tactical command, capture, and control. I do intelligence gathering and conversion combat."
"Conversion combat?"
"Yeah. If we're fighting multiple enemies then I take one of them over and either make him attack his teammates from behind or kill himself so I can move on to the next."
Hazō tensed for just a moment at the calm way she said that, then allowed himself to relax again as she went back to rubbing his neck. Her hands moved down to his shoulders and he groaned in relief.
"Doesn't your jutsu leave you helpless?" he asked, looking up so that he could watch her face. Her pale eyes never failed to rivet his attention; they weren't uniform, having tiny flecks of green and gold mixed into the pale blue.
"Yes," she admitted. "We have solutions for that. Sometimes Shika will use his shadow jutsu to puppet my body while I'm out of it, keep it away from attackers."
That was substantially more specific tactical information than he would have expected her to share. Sweethearts they might be, but volunteering important details of your team's combat plans? That was serious.
He reached back and trailed his hand down her arm. "I love you. You know that, right?"
"Yup. Now hush, I'm trying to get this knot out."
He laughed and then grunted as she dug her fingers into the knot in his shoulder. He breathed through the momentary pain and then moaned in pleasure as the tension melted away.
Best. Girlfriend. Ever.
o-o-o-o
"Later expected than you are," Kumoairashī said. "Well all is?" She turned and skipped towards the Orbularium.
"All is well, yes," Hazō said, following after with Cantelabra trotting at his side. "I had some work to finish before I could come."
"And you saw Ino!" Cantelabra volunteered. The pup had provided Hazō's ride to the Seventh Path and was now following along, curious to see whatever had brought Hazō across the worlds. Also, 'pup' was no longer quite the right term. The young dog was growing fast and he was already well taller than Hazō's knee, and solid enough that carrying him any distance would have gotten tiring quickly. It was also requiring more chakra to summon him, which was a concern. The entire point of bonding all the puppies was that they were cheap to summon.
"Her scent is all over you," Cantelabra volunteered. "You must have rolled on each other!"
Hazō closed his eyes for a moment and breathed. "We did not roll on each other, Cantelabra," he said. "And among humans it's rude to suggest that we did."
Without breaking stride, Hazō leaned down to scritch the dog's ear. "S'okay, buddy. We hugged and she gave me a neck massage. I've got a really bad headache. But the original reason I was running late really was the paperwork."
"Kagome Summoner paperwork is doing with the Empress!" Kumoairashī volunteered. "He is doing the papers that explode."
"He's making explosive tags with the Empress?" Hazō asked, concerned.
Kumoairashī nodded, a body language element that she had picked up from the humans and that was a bit awkward for her since it involved moving her entire cephalothorax. "Drawing but not inpuffing, since Grandfather forbade creation of paper magic. But he has many that are already made and is exploding them! Extremely neat is it! Boom! Pshow!" She made little explodey gestures with her front two legs while maintaining her pace on the other six.
"That's...nice," Hazō said.
"It really is!" Cantelabra said. "They smell neat! Each one is a little bit different, and they sound a little different too."
Huh. Hazō had never particularly noticed a scent around explosive tags. The sounds were a little different, yes, but only very slightly. The precise timbre and pitch were artifacts of the infusion process and Kagome-sensei's infusions were so smooth and reliable that the sound of each explosion barely varied.
"I'm glad you like them," he said.
"Here are we!" Kumoairashī said brightly as they arrived in the Orbularium. "Empress! Kagome Summoner! I bring the Summoner of Doggies!"
"The what now?" Hazō muttered.
"Doggies?" Cantelabra said, cocking his head at the spider. He looked up at Hazō. "Am I a doggy, Uncle Hazō? I thought I was a dog."
"It's a word from the Human Path," Hazō said, debating how to thread the needle on this one. "It's complicated, but it's sort of like a term of endearment for dogs." He didn't particularly want to get into the complex cultural implications around the word 'doggy', but he also didn't want to walk himself straight into a trope from poorly-written comedy plays in which he would paper over something awkward and it would be discovered later in a way that caused 'amusing' drama.
"It's mostly used by children," he added, hoping to strangle the drama in its crib.
"You not the Summoner of Doggies are?" Kumoairashī asked, spinning in a circle so that she could make eye contact with Hazō while continuing to move in the same direction.
"I'm the Dog Summoner," Hazō said. "Summoner of Doggies isn't wrong, exactly, but it's probably not the term I would use."
"Oh. Pity that is. Kagome Summoner very nice makes doggies sound." She looked at Cantelabra. "Kagome Summoner says very important it is to not pet a doggy without offering your hand first so that they can smell you. Smell me so pet you I can!" With great enthusiasm, she stuck a leg under Cantelabra's nose.
The gesture wasn't aimed anywhere near Hazō, but the suddenness of it still made him tense up. Cantelabra took it in stride, snuffling up and down the leg.
"You smell weird!" Cantelabra said, once the olfactory exploration was complete. "Not bad, just weird. Spicy, like a cross between how Uncle Kagome's chili smells as long as you're halfway across the room and that brown dirt that he puts in his tea sometimes."
"That's not dirt, it's a spice called cinnamon," Hazō said, amused at the fact that Kumoairashī was now rubbing one of her legs down Cantelabra's back and using a different one to scritch behind the young dog's ear.
Cantelabra was leaning into the petting, eyes closed and making blep face.
"Greetings, Hazō," the Empress called from where she and Kagome-sensei were seated in the center of the Orbularium's enormous floor web. "Join us, please you should."
"Greetings, Empress," Hazō called back. "Cantelabra, Kumoairashī, why don't you guys head off? This is probably going to be boring."
"Okay!" / "Assenting!"
The two youngsters (or, at least, one youngster and one arachnid of indeterminate age but rather child-like persona) scrambled out of the room, already engaged in an impromptu game of tag.
Hazō smiled after them, then moved to join his wife and his teacher.
"You're late," Kagome-sensei grumbled. He leaned in close, snuffling through his beaky nose. "Oh, good, you were with Ino."
"First of all, seriously?" Hazō said. "You can't possibly—" He broke off and twisted his head so he could smell his own shoulder. "Yeah, you can't possibly smell her on me. Cantelabra, okay, fine, but I refuse to believe a human can. Secondly, I thought you were freaked out about me dating her?"
"Not dating her," Kagome-sensei said, fixing his eyes determinedly on the explosive tag blank that he was drawing. "Kids," he muttered under his breath. "Always growing up and getting all girl- and boy-crazy and then what happens? Distracted while sealing! Nose demons rip everything apart and put it all back together backwards and upside down! Hah!"
Hazō chuckled. "Thank you for the concern, sensei," he said. "I think I'm managing."
"Yeah, yeah," Kagome-sensei grumbled. "Anyway, it's good that you were with her because you're always more relaxed after. Makes your head less likely to explode."
"Is likely his head to explode?" Kumokōgō asked, concerned. "Bad seems this. Hazō's head unexploded I wish to remain."
"I'm fine," Hazō reassured the massive arachnid. "It's something of a joke between the two of us." He gestured back and forth between himself and his teacher. "It's not actually going to explode. And, speaking of terrible segues, I had some questions for you if you wouldn't mind?"
"Provided unlikely your head truly is to explode, ask you may."
"Cool, thank you," he said, rolling right past the bizarre syntax. "I was thinking about the Archaeopteryx Clan, and it occurred to me that if you were willing to permit it then it might be useful for me and maybe Kagome-sensei to skywalk over there and see if any of them have survived. Would that be a problem?"
"Not for me a problem it is," Kumokōgō said. "A long way, though. Far past the butte of the Great Seal the ocean is, and then three days paddling from there. Once you reach it, uncertain I am of your welcome. Angry might the survivors be. Perhaps attack on sight."
"It should be safe for us," Hazō said. "We can use skywalkers to dodge, and we can always unsummon ourselves if we have to. Kagome-sensei, what do you think? On the one hand, it would be good to have you along. On the other hand, I know that you've got a lot going on back on the Human Path, what with teaching and research and such. Can you spare the time and are you interested in going?"
Kagome-sensei chewed on the end of his brush for a moment. "Yeah," he said. "It sounds neat. Not sure how far 'three days paddling' is, but probably more skywalkers than we want to burn. We should get a boat."
"Boats provided can be," Kumokōgō said. "A guide and paddlers I can send."
"Thank you," Hazō said. "I'll need to talk to Asuma to make sure he's okay with it, but I wanted to check with both of you first. Empress, can you tell me more about the general geography of this area? Who are your neighbors, are there any major land features it would be good to know about, anything between here and the Archaeopteryx Clan, that kind of thing?"
"Nothing between the coast and the Archaeopteryx, no," Kumokōgō said. "If miss their island you do, starve you will before other land seeing." She waved a leg, dismissing the issue. "Regarding the land, Arachnid very large is. Essentially westmost fifth of continent." She shifted slightly, finding a more comfortable position and folding her two forward legs together. "Main body of the continent is an arc, with major inlet almost cutting it in two at the westernmost fifth. Area west of the inlet is Arachnid, except for very small Raccoon on the southwest coast and modest-sized Kangaroo on the southeast. Eastern part of Kangaroo is a land bridge that to the main continent part connects us. Other half of the land bridge is Squirrel, with Cat wrapped around it. I know Raptor east from there is somewhere, on the coast, but uncertain what else is there."
Hazō's fingers twitched as he sketched in the air, drawing the image that the massive spider was describing. "Do Raccoon and Kangaroo touch?"
"No. Two hundred, three hundred miles between them? Something that like. Neither Squirrel and Raptor. Unsure of the separation amount, but there is it."
"And it's Cat that spills down between them?"
"Like the smelly fat-bearers they are," Kumokōgō said. "Bloop, bleh, flop. Stinkers."
Kagome-sensei laughed and held up a fist. The Empress of the Arachnid Clan, unbelievably, rapped it with a pedipalp in the closest to a proper fist-bump that a spider could manage.
"What about the Sharks?" Hazō asked. "Will we need to deal with them if we want to cross to the Archaeopteryx island?"
The Empress flipped one pedipalp in the equivalent of a human's dismissive shrug. "Mostly not care they do about boats, plus the various shivers move around much often, making negotiations difficult and agreements soon irrelevant. If approach they do, unlikely they are to attack the boat. Remain in it, be polite if they seek to speak. Conflict is rare unless provoked."
Kagome-sensei held up an explosive tag and considered it lovingly, a creepy smile on his face. "Did you know that explosives work better underwater?" he asked of no one in particular.
"Right," Hazō said, ignoring his teacher's implications of shatteringly violent explosion-based murder with the ease of long practice. "Well, it'll be too late to clear it with Asuma by the time we get back, but I'll talk to him tomorrow. Assuming he's okay with it, I'd like to get some work done on my current seal project and then we can head out."
"Your current seal project related to the Dragons is?"
Hazō rubbed his neck. "Sort of? Not directly. This one is aimed at making me more survivable in a fight. On the other hand, it's going to help me explore detection of environmental chakra effects, which is something we're going to need for estimating the rate of deterioration on the Great Seal." He looked over to his teacher. "Sensei, I was thinking: after I finish the next version of chakdar, maybe we could combine it with your chakrascope seals to get something with a longer range. What do you think?"
Kagome-sensei considered that one. "It's going to be tricky," he said. "Chakra diffusion problem is going to keep you from extending the range very far at all, and the entire point of the chakrascope is to be very sensitive to even small fluctuations. If we extended the detection radius then there would be more of those fluctuations in the detection radius and it would muddy the readings. It's why I made them short-ranged in the first place." He eyed Hazō for a moment, then narrowed his eyes. "Hang on, did you think my chakrascope seals had a short range because I couldn't do any better?"
"Hazō," Kumokōgō said, "your explosion seals different than his, Kagome tells me. Show me?"
"Of course," Hazō said, grateful to the Empress for changing the topic so that Kagome-sensei did not continue the interrogation. (Had that been deliberate?) He fished a stack of his own explosive seals from a pouch and held them out. "See, my feathering is more angular than Kagome-sensei's, and my stroke ordering is different on this area, because..."
The Spider Empress leaned close as he pointed at the various elements of the seal, listening intently as he went off on a long explanation of the differences between two sealmasters styles.
o-o-o-o
Mari slumped into the kitchen with a yawn and gratefully accepted the mug of strong-brewed tea that Hazō extended to her. She had apparently slept poorly because she was rumpled and wearing a slouchy robe with the slippers that Kagome-sensei had re-fleeced and resoled for her.
"Morning," she mumbled. "You're up early."
Hazō smiled. "Actually, you're up late. I met with Kumokōgō yesterday, got home in time for dinner, slept like a log, and even had time to talk to Asuma this morning. He signed off on letting me explore the Seventh Path and make contact with another Clan."
"Bah." She waved a hand dismissively and took a hard pull on her tea. "Too complicated. Tell later."
He laughed. "Okay, fair enough. In that case, does this look like anything to you?" Hazō asked, offering a sheet of paper with ink blotches.
She took it from him and studied it, then turned it over and looked at it the other way. She knocked back the rest of her tea and poured herself another mug from the pot. "Not offhand, although there's something vaguely familiar about it. What is it?"
"It's the steps of this dance that Ami pulled me into," he explained. "She led me through it multiple times and there was something weird about it so I've tried to sketch it out."
Mari shrugged. "Dunno. Let me get some food, a bath, and some proper clothes and then you can replay it for me. Maybe it'll make sense when I can see the full version."
"Cool, thanks." He took a sip of his tea. "How are things going in general?" He wasn't going to push for details about Haru's current project. She had told him to release on it. Yup. No pushing. Really. Still, he could hint, right?
"They're fine," she said, yawning. "Oh, there's a new art exhibit in town. Beautiful stuff; you should take Ino and Akane."
"What's it like?"
"It's mixed media, sculpture and painting arranged in a three-sided box so it's like looking into a house. I think the artist was trying for a commentary on living conditions, because..."
He settled back and sipped his tea, enjoying the sound of her voice washing over him with comfortable, homey topics that had nothing to do with clan or seals or anything else.
Author's Note: This update covered 11 days, mostly because you have committed seal research. Specifically:
You waited 2 days recovering from the Sealing Scroll Acolyte headache derived from your previous sealing roll, using the time for the scenes shown herein
You then did 6 days of prep work for a bonus of +12 on the roll
You spent a day doing actual infusion work. Kagome checked your notes before you did it but was not around full-time so you get to use him as an Aspect but not an assistant
You spent 2 days recovering from the SSA headache caused by this research roll
Results of seal research: 51 (Sealing) + 12 (prep) + 6 (invoke "Kagome-approved Research Facility") + 6 (invoke "Kagome Checked My Work") - 3 (dice) = 72
I'm not sure what the TN on this seal is so we'll have to get back to you on the exact outcome.
There were some things in life, Hazō knew, that he would invariably regret putting off. Urgent meetings with the Hokage. Sealing safety preparations. Nipping Kei drama in the bud. In fact, there were many such things (which said a lot about his life), and he really couldn't be blamed if, every now and again, one slipped his mind. Unfortunately, the universe being an uncooperative and unfair place, lack of blame did not mean lack of consequences.
"What do you mean, you're engaged to Ami?"
Akane stared at Hazō across the kitchen table, where he'd happened to come across her during a much-needed break from reviewing budget changes to be made in accordance with the new tax compliance regulations (which Kei would have been on top of if he hadn't whisked her away to Honey—but on the other hand, they would probably also all be dead, so he was willing to take the hit). While Hazō was prepared to grant that "Oh, by the way" might not have been the best start to this particular conversation, he did feel Akane's look of exasperation was a little excessive.
"It was an accident," Hazō insisted. "I don't actually intend to marry her."
"I know," Akane said. "So what did she do this time?"
"Actually," Hazō said, "it's not exactly that she did something. It's more that I did a thing that could be interpreted as a marriage proposal by somebody in a certain frame of mind, and Ami found out, and then I had a great idea for how to prevent this issue from ever coming up again, which required doubling down on it being a real proposal, and then the part after the doubling down didn't work and now I have technically proposed marriage to her and caused her to accept without any action on her part."
"But you don't actually intend to marry her," Akane said.
"I don't. And I'm pretty sure she doesn't intend to marry me either."
"Has she said that?" Akane asked.
"No," Hazō admitted, "but I know Ami. Control is one of her big three things—four if you count Kei—and if she married me, she'd become a Gōketsu and come under my absolute authority. I don't think she'd go for that even if she was madly in love with me." He paused. "Byakuren's fishy breath, I hope she's not madly in love with me."
"Ah," Akane said. "In that case, I have bad news for you, and possibly for me as well."
"Go on."
"Ami is a clan head, like Naruto. She told me back when I was congratulating her on her adoption."
"She's a what."
"The way she explained it," Akane said, "was that she obviously couldn't still be a member of a Mist clan, but there were also enough reasons not to de-clan her—no massive deal-breakers, just a dozen different diplomatic and legal headaches which could be completely avoided by taking her deal and making her the sole member of the Leaf Mori Clan. She did make the concession of not being able to adopt without the Hokage's permission, because if I can imagine Ami using her KEI authority to adopt every KEI ninja in Leaf for 1 ryō each, then so can he."
"Does she need clan head status? She's one of the most powerful individuals in Leaf."
"It keeps the Frozen Skein as a clan secret," Akane said. "Both Mist and the Nara want that, and if the Hokage just turned her into a KEI ninja with special rights, it would be a precedent for other KEI ninja.
"More importantly, it means she can marry you without becoming a Gōketsu, just like Ino would."
Hazō gave her a questioning look.
"I'm not making a judgement of whether that's a thing that should happen or when, Hazō," Akane said impatiently. "It's just that somebody has to keep an eye on the practicalities.
"Now we have an extra practicality," she went on, "which is that you no longer know whether Ami wants to marry you. You don't want to marry her, so we don't have to have that conversation, so does that mean you can just do the simple thing and cancel the engagement unilaterally?"
"You have a conversation ready for that?" Hazō asked uneasily.
"Yes," Akane said. "It's long and complicated, and at one point I was honestly tempted to turn it into a flowchart like you and Kei do. I rehearse it occasionally, because Ami being Ami and you being you, I won't be confident that you won't end up marrying her until you marry someone else—and then only until plural marriage becomes legal, because between us and Kei, that's only a matter of time."
"I don't want to marry Ami," Hazō repeated. That would require him to a) be insane (or rather, a particular kind of insane which he didn't think he was), b) be in love with Ami (which he definitely wasn't, ambiguous generic attraction notwithstanding), and c) have a solid bond of trust with Ami (which was a work in progress at best and might turn out to be impossible at worst).
"That said," he went on, "I have a feeling that she sees the whole engagement thing as a game (assuming she's not serious this time, which would be blood-chilling). She'd respect me getting out of it in a clever way, as I almost did, but if she thinks I'm the one leading her on, only to declare that I'm taking my toys and going home because I can't think of a good move... actually, I don't know what would happen, but none of the options I can think of are good.
"Don't worry, Akane. I'm Gōketsu Hazō. I will think of something, and it will be something so amazing that it will completely blow her away and make this engagement the tiniest of footnotes in the illustrious Gōketsu history."
Akane nodded. "And that will definitely make her less interested in you and less inclined to marry you."
"What do you want from me, woman?" Hazō demanded in his best aggrieved Jiraiya tones.
Akane sighed. "Never mind. I think in this case, the crime is its own punishment."
Hazō eyed the water thoughtfully. "So, technically speaking, we'll be passing through Shark territory to get to the Archaeopteryx's island?"
"Indeed!" Kumoairashī said. "But not need worry, human. Have longtime allies Arachnids and Sharks been, and attack unlikely is.
"Though," she said thoughtfully, "humans mammals are, yes? Take care not to in the water have blood, please."
Hazō looked up at Arachnid's sky, that sickly yellow-green that Kagome was still trying to convince him was 'pear-colored'. He faced Kumoairashī. "Are the colors of water different too, the farther you go down? Because out there," he said gesturing to the open ocean, "the sky is still Arachnid's color."
Kumoairashī twitched her front legs forward, a sudden gesture that Hazō still had to suppress a flinch for. "You are meaning of the territories of Clans Kraken and Crustacean? Farther down is darker color water. Have you not deep waters in Human Path?"
Hazō shook his head. "No, I was just wondering if the water was, I dunno, purple or something."
"Ah, color. Arachnids see not so many colors as you! Perplexing is. Know not if down farther colors change. Hard enough to in plain light color see, harder still in even shallow water."
"Enough jabbering," Kagome said, "are we going or not?"
Kumoairashī bowed to the summoner as he got off the Arachnid boat. The Arachnids made their boats round, with no prow in any direction. In theory, it could go in any direction at all, and a complicated mass of webbing built above the ship would support dozens of sails for any direction they wanted to travel. Not that the sails would be their main mode of locomotion – apparently, the boat was mainly powered by paddling! While a fine idea over calm waters, Hazō's Mist-born intuition told him that the inhuman boat wouldn't last a day on the open ocean.
Upon arriving at the shore, Kagome had spent nearly an hour examining the boat they were to take. While he'd also seemed perplexed at first, apparently that inspection had freed him of his concerns, and he looked at Hazō expectantly.
"Here, I am to the Empress returning," Kumoairashī said. "Is not my role for to dangerous lands traveling or to hungry Eaters dying."
"Hazō," Cangue said, "are you sure you don't want me to come along? I am willing, if need be."
Hazō shook his head and stepped to Cangue's side to run a hand through her coat. "No, Cangue, it's fine. I can spend a couple days without the ability to pop back and forth between Paths on a whim. It's not risky since I'll have reverse summoning, and I'll be back as soon as we're done on the island. On the other hand, if a Dragon attacks us over open water, everyone but me and Kagome will die. We'll only survive if we can react fast enough. We know Dragons passed this way to attack the Archaeopteryx Clan. It's not a risk we need to take."
"Very well, summoner," Cangue said, dipping her head down.
"Don't worry about it. We'll check in with Canabisu and Kumokōgō as soon as we're done here, and Kumoairashī knows the way back more than well enough, right?"
Kumoairashī clicked her mandibles. "Indeed. Even for squishy and aromatic mammals, journey through Arachnid territory if accompanied by Empress's Herald safe is. Unless again Eaters attack, of course."
"Well, it's good that the Dragons have stayed by the Great Seal then," Hazō said. They'd taken a circuitous route through Arachnid to avoid nearing the butte and provoking the Dragons. Kumokōgō had been tracking their movements carefully, and the Dragons definitely hunted less after Hazō and the Arachnids killed one of their number. Hazō hoped that was because they were scared, not because they were planning.
"C'mon, Hazō! Sooner we get there, sooner we get back!" Kagome said.
"I'll be seeing you soon," Hazō said to Cangue and Kumoairashī.
"Alright, Kagome-sensei," Hazō said as he started up the silken gangplank. "Let's go."
o-o-o
"That's it, isn't it?"
"Correct," said Kumokoro. "As remembered I."
Hazō looked over the edge of the boat and its railing of silk-bound chitin and branches, across several miles of ocean, to the islands of Archaeopteryx.
It was dark.
Neither of the two islands had any shores. They were jagged spikes of striated grey basalt, breaking the ocean's flat seascape. The smaller island looked like a miniature mountain range, with a series of peaks jutting out of the water, while the larger one was just a single mountain. It rose up higher and steeper than any mountain Hazō had seen on the Human Path, with a single cleft near its summit splitting its one peak into two.
Above the two islands and in the seas surrounding them, the sky was black.
Kumokoro, one of the far-speakers sent to investigate the Archaeopteryx, had described this to Hazō and Kaogme when they'd boarded the ship two days prior. Several far-speakers had been sent to the Archaeopteryx, but Kumokoro was one of the few to set foot on their island and return to tell the tale. Not that there was much tale to tell – apparently, whatever was killing the other far-speakers didn't see fit to attack Kumokoro, who only stepped foot on the island for a few minutes before returning to the boat.
"This is… very strange," Hazō said.
"Yes, agreement," Kumokoro said. "Worse on the island feels. Claws like down your back running all times always, too deep for comforting scratch yet not enough deep for breaking chitin."
As they watched the islands, the thick-legged spiders paddling the boat continued diligently drawing them closer. There was no light shining on the islands from above, but the ocean surrounding the islands reflected barely enough light for Hazō to make out bits and pieces of surface detail. As they drew closer and closer, Hazō leaned forward at the edge of the boat to see more clearly. There were still shapes moving above the islands and between them.
"Are those the Archaeopteryx?" Hazō asked.
"Is not," Kumokoro said. "Many bird kinds the islands good for are, even those of Grandfather gifts proscribed. Remember I is that of good roosting places, and many fish in waters for bird eating. Proud peoples Archaeopteryx were, remembering I. Themselves saw as 'Kings of Skies.' Very proud. Prefer to keep near lesser birds for ego inflation. You know Archaeopteryx when see. Very large. Very large."
"Got it," Hazō said. "And besides, I assume the Dragons would have eaten most of them that weren't willing to hide out. It's good that they have food and water at least. It means some may have survived. Could you get Kagome-sensei and show him this? Let's suit up and get ready to explore."
o-o-o
Hazō and Kagome climbed the side of the island. Well, 'climbed', in that they used skywalkers to gain elevation while staying close to the island's slope to not stick out too openly. Neither of them wanted to go without skywalkers in the case of an ambush, and they didn't want to climb the slopes by hand. They were moving slowly and silently, hoping not to provoke whatever had killed the Arachnid far-speakers.
They'd been able to hear bird calls at first, but the wind intensified as they climbed higher. They'd been taking chakrascope readings and stone samples, but nothing was unusual yet. There were no signs of life (or at least, life more intelligent than the few birds that they'd startled away in their approach), and no signs of a fight. If it weren't for the deeply abnormal sky, Hazō could have believed that there had never been an Archaeopteryx Clan.
Hazō shuddered slightly as his attention returned to the sensation. As soon as they passed under the dark section of sky, it started. He couldn't describe it properly. It felt otherworldly. Like being gently rubbed with sandpaper all over, or being licked by a million pinprick-sized wet, fleshy tendrils.
Can anyone spot the attacker as it swoops down over them?
Attacker wins ties. Kagome Goo Bombs the bird and it dies very soon after to a "Boom Squish".
"Look out!" Kagome yelled.
Hazō didn't bother looking in the dark. He flicked on both skywalkers and pulled with his hamstrings to drop as quickly as he could, then flickered them off. As he started to fall, he spun in a ball mid-air till his feet were facing upwards, then reactivated them to jump explosively downwards. He looked to the sky beneath him just long enough to see a massive black blur zip through the space where he'd just been.
He landed hard, the Pangolin jutsu buckling and breaking to cushion his fall long enough to leave him with a bruised shoulder rather than a broken one. He bounced off the side of the cliff, but before he could start to roll, he reactivated his skywalkers and ran.
Stay or flee? Running would mean losing days of progress, but staying and dying would mean losing the entire Seventh Path. He didn't know anything about the number and type of attackers. He had to go.
He shouted for Kagome-sensei to evacuate, then prepared the handseal of dismissal to send himself back to the Human Path.
He spun at the sound of a Goo Bomb's wet splorch, followed shortly by a sloppy flump as the dark shape hit the mountainside. He could make out its avian form now, and could see where the Goo Bomb had clipped a wing-tip just enough to drag the thing to the stone. It struggled against the adhesive.
"Die, stinker!"
Twin cracks rang out with twin flashes of flame, black splashes of blood and black feathers burst out, and the attacker stopped moving. Hazō waited a moment for any other assailant to materialize, but none came.
"Hazō, are you okay?" Kagome said.
"I'm fine, sensei," he replied, climbing up to Kagome's elevation. "What was that?"
Kagome looked down at the bird that had attacked them and gave a disdainful sniff. "Doesn't matter now. It's dead. Stinker. That's what you get."
Hazō lit a Jiraiya's Daybright Lantern in his pocket – not quite bright enough to be a beacon but enough to see by – and skywalked down. The bird was massive, nearly as long from beak to tail feathers as Hazō was tall, and its wings spanned easily thrice that length. Its long legs ended in razor-sharp talons and gray-green plumage covered its wings. Kagome's blast rings had hit the bird's center of mass dead-on, as most of its body was pulverized.
"I think it's an Archaeopteryx. Kumokoro said they were massive and none of the other birds we've seen were nearly this size. It must have thought we were here to attack it." Hazō said. "Madara's all-seeing balls, I knew we should have tried to go in diplomatically."
Kagome crossed his arms. "It attacked us first."
"I know it did, sensei. Just… convincing them we're on their side is going to be harder now."
A voice called out from above. "Hail! We mean you no harm."
Hazō and Kagome jumped away from each other, looking up and palming their seals. Far above them, another avian shape was slowly descending in shallow circles.
Kagome reared back to throw another Goo Bomb, and Hazō called out, "Kagome-sensei, wait!"
The bird perced on the mountainside a dozen meters away, eye-level with Hazō and Kagome. Even with his pocketed Daybright Lantern, he couldn't make out the bird's features.
"I mean you no harm," the bird said again in a low, calm, masculine voice. "You are humans, summoners, correct? You and I both know I could not harm you before you could retreat to the Human Path, so I have no reason to try. My comrades and I need your assistance. You've made a lot of noise here. Follow me, and we can speak somewhere safer."
Hazō shook his head, then realized belatedly that, apart from the darkness obscuring him, the Seventh Path denizen would definitely not understand his body language. "We're not going anywhere with you yet. It could be a trap." Kagome mimed throwing explosives at the bird, and Hazō gestured at him to stop. "Who are you, and what do you want?"
"My name is Contorite, of the Condor Clan," he said.
Hazō pulled the Daybright seal fully out of his pocket for a moment, and saw the condor. It had black wings with a ruffle of white feathers around its neck, and the skin of its bald head was yellow and wrinkled. Two shiny black eyes peered back at him in the light of the seal.
"Yes, I am a condor. Before you ask, the Archaeopteryx Clan is no more. And now that you've drawn so much attention with that bright light on this dark island, will you follow me to a cave, out of the open, where we can talk more safely?"
Does Hazō get a bad feeling about this, if indeed an ambush is being planned?
Hazō looked to Kagome, who shook his head violently. "Kagome-sensei, I'm going to go. I want to figure out what's happened to the Archaeopteryx."
"It is not far, and you may stay nearest the mouth of the cave, if that helps," Contorite offered. "But it is dangerous to stay here. I must go," he said, spreading his wings. "Follow if you can, or leave if you cannot. Here, to wait idly in the open is death."
The Condor took wing and started gliding slowly down the mountainside. Hazō looked at Kagome one more time. "He's going closer to the ship. He must not have seen us come in. I think it'll be fine."
"It's obviously a trap!" Kagome said. "Bird-brained stinkers are gonna trap us in the cave and cave it in!"
"We can set up any precautions you want and make them answer any questions we have to make sure we're safe," Hazō said. "It sounds like they need our help more than we need theirs. Let's go and see what they have to say."
o-o-o
The inside of the cave was smelly and damp. The entire island was covered in the faint stench of bird droppings, but it was a hundred times stronger in the cramped confines of the cave, where bird droppings were clearly caught in cracks and crevices too deep for the occasional rain to wash them out.
Contorite had waited at the mouth of the cave for them, and led them through a short passageway. They'd set traps as they entered, using prepared chains of explosives and MARS to give them a readily detonated explosive cover if they needed to escape.
The passageway opened up into a larger chamber, and Hazō pulled the Lantern seal fully out of his pocket to light the cavern and the collection of condors perched on various stones around it.
Hazō and Kagome flinched as a thump sounded from the far side of the cavern and a beaked head poked out of a crack in the stone. It cawed futilely, scratching at the stone that separated it from the main cavern, then retreated. Hazō released Kagome's hand that he didn't even realize he'd caught midway through blast disk throw.
"Was that another Archaeopteryx?" Hazō asked.
"His name was Shisoroseri," Contorite said. "He was our brother in arms. But he has become gthsss, along with the rest of his clan, and we have not yet had the courage to end his story.
"Allow me to introduce you to my other comrades," he said, gesturing with a wing around the hollow stone chamber. "Condo. Contina. Contako. Conzenji. Contesa. If things have continued as poorly as they were last we heard from Conjura, we make up one of the last remaining cells of the Wings of Liberty."
With each name, one of the condors in the cave extended a wing. Their movements were slow and tired, giving the room a funerary mood.
Hazō cleared his throat. "My name is Gōketsu Hazō. I am the Dog Summoner, and this is my uncle, Gōketsu Kagome, who is the Arachnid Summoner. I am pleased to meet you, honorable condors."
Can Hazō hide the fact that he's indirectly the one responsible for all the suffering the condors experienced?
Hey, they're freedom fighters, not diplomats. Somehow, he keeps it under wraps.
"What do you mean you're pleased to meet them?" Kagome said. "They're condors! You-"
Hazō grabbed Kagome's shoulder very firmly, squeezing almost tightly enough to make the older man yelp.
"My apologies. I should have offered my condolences as well. I've heard stories about what the Pangolins did to your people."
"Hazō, what do you mean stories? Don't you remember-"
"Sensei!" Hazō said loudly, prompting scratching from the imprisoned Archaeopteryx. He winced at the reverberation in the cave, then spoke again more quietly. "These people suffered a terrible tragedy. It's important that we be quiet and respectful, rather than talking about old wrongdoings."
Contorite snorted, an odd, high-pitched whine. "It's not your fault, Gōketsu Hazō. We have had plenty of time to come to terms with the reality of the situation. It does not matter how high a condor soars if he keeps his eyes closed the whole time."
Hazō gave Kagome a glare to make sure he would keep quiet.
"Do you have news of the world beyond this island?" asked Contina. "Do you know what has happened to the Condor Clan, or the Pangolin Clan? Does Conjura live? Or of the Human Path, do you know of the dealings of the Condor Summoner or the Pangolin Summoner?"
Kagome opened his mouth to answer the Pangolin Summoner question, and Hazō interrupted him. "I'm sorry, but we've been in Arachnid Territory for a long time, and even Dog doesn't border Pangolin or Condor. From my understanding, the Pangolins are still enslaving your people, but Conjura lives and continues to lead the resistance."
Contorite nodded. "The Wings of Liberty will soar eternal. Enough with the questions, Contina. If we can make it off the island, we can learn more about what transpired in our absence. Any refuge on the continent would be superior to this wretched place."
"We have a boat," Hazō said, eager to change the topic off the Condor genocide. "The Arachnids paddled it here. We waterwalked to the island and left the boat outside of the dark skies. If you can fly that far, maybe a couple miles, then you can land there and we could ferry you back to the continent."
Immediately, tension drained out of the room.
"Oh Conductor's mercy," Conzenji said. "Gōketsu Hazō, thank you. You are a blessing from the Conductor himself."
"A couple of miles?" Contina said with a squawk, "We would fly a hundred for a chance of survival!"
"Er," Hazō said, "if that's okay with Kumokōgō, the Arachnid Empress, since we'd be ferrying you into Arachnid territory. Kagome can check with her after we're done here."
Contorite raised a wing. "So long as her people will not attack us while we are aboard the ship, you needn't bother the Empress. We are used to being unwelcome strangers. The islands of Archaeopteryx are too far from the mainland for us to fly in a single stretch, but if you can ferry us even halfway, we can make it to Arachnid and find a place to truly rest. If you think it is likely she will refuse, then please, do not ask. Just get us close enough for us to make the rest of the way on our own.
"For this service, the Condor Clan would owe you and your people an immense debt. I know it is not meaningful now, but I assure you, when our brothers and sisters are freed from the Pangolin Clan's abhorrent claws, we will repay you in full."
Hazō tightened his grip on Kagome's shoulder, eliciting a small yelp. Somehow, the Iron Nerve was keeping his face calm and neutral even as he was lying through his teeth to the Condors he'd helped destroy.
"So why did you come to the Archaeopteryx anyway?" Hazō asked.
Contorite gave a series of short caws. "Ah yes, I can imagine you would be confused at why there are Condors on such a distant island. I can tell you the story, though it is a long one."
"Please do," Hazō said.
"Very well. In the war, we had sent emissaries to our allied clans. Cowards, the lot. They withheld aid, no doubt due to fear of the Pangolin's new technology and uncertainty as to the extent of its capabilities. As it became clear that we were losing badly, Conjura sent our squad to the Crow Clan to beseech their aid. They are neutral and rarely deal in other clans' disputes, but they are our brothers by feather. They also strongly prefer peace and have a personally powerful summoner that could support us.
"Needless to say, they rejected our requests, and the Raptors likewise. When we returned, our defenses had collapsed and the Condor Army had been fully destroyed. All those still loyal to Conjura and able to fly of their own wing had become the Wings of Liberty, and our orders were one: survive.
"We fled for months, traveling clan to clan and frequently overstaying our welcome."
"You know it's gone bad when you've overstayed a Capybara's hospitality!" Condo called out.
"At least they were nice about it," Contorite said. "Regardless, after many months, we met with Conjura and the other Wings of Liberty in Hyena, where she elected to support the Hyenas in resisting the Pangolin onslaught. We aided their clan, ignoring how they had denied us aid scant months prior, primarily performing scouting for the Hyena forces. Then Conjura gave us a special operation. Apparently, an unknown avian clan lived at the far end of the continent. The odds were astronomically low, but they might have been convinced to lend any assistance at all, something they would be better equipped to give than the other clans who would need to cross the entire continent on foot first.
"So, she sent us. We flew through Dog and Bear and Cat, setting down to sleep for the bare minimum time before taking wing again. We negotiated passage with the Cats-"
"Asshole pricks. I swear half of them were eyeing us like we were food!" said Condo.
"They were not. They would have killed us, perhaps, but I do not think they are so far from the Conductor's wisdom as to consume us," Contorite said.
"They do eat birds though."
"That is true. Regardless, they arranged for some Arachnids to ferry us to Archaeopteryx and we managed to gain acceptance as a diplomatic envoy."
"This all sounds pretty normal so far," Hazō said carefully. "Was the sky black then?"
"No, it was the color of golden amber. Patience, I am getting to the moment of tragedy. We negotiated with Shisoberin, the Archaeopteryx King, but of course met dead air quickly. We opted to stay longer, making friends and allies among the Archaeopteryx in the hope of developing a connection that might force Shisoberin to act. That changed when the Dragons attacked."
"You saw the Dragons?" Hazō asked.
"Yes," Contorite said. "You know of them? Interesting. You will have to tell me what you know of them, later.
"The first attack was devastating. On the lesser island, a great beast slithered from the ocean and laid waste to everything it saw, eating alive any Archaeopteryx foolish enough to fight back. It alone outmatched the Archaeopteryx Clan's strongest fighters. I believe the same would hold true of the Condor Clan – that no warrior short of Conjura could have defeated it. Through their combined efforts and many losses, the Archaeopteryx Clan's warrior-princes finally slew it."
"Wait," Hazō said, "you killed a Dragon?"
"Not I, personally," said Contorite, "I am a warrior, but I would not count myself among the Condor Clan's elites. The Archaeopteryx warrior-prince, Shisoseto, slew this one."
"Is its body anywhere that we could see?"
"Its body was toxic and corrosive and was hurled into the sea."
"Got it…" Hazō said, thoughts buzzing in his head.
"It was a tragedy, but one that united the Archaeopteryx, which is why I suspect Shisoberin did not intervene. The Archaeopteryx had gone long without an enemy, evidenced by their infighting. Regardless, it was a week after that when the next Dragon came."
"This one was larger, stronger, and fiercer than its brother, and this time, Shisoberin left his roost to fight it. He swiftly slew it before too much life could be lost. He tried to calm the people, but I suspect everyone knew what would happen next.
"Another Dragon came, and while Shisoberin slew it, its abilities were far greater and many Archaeopteryx died by its claws. Then another came, and he knew he could not defeat it alone quickly enough to spare his people. He called the warrior-princes and the Archaeopteryx Summoner, and together, they slew it too. Each one was stronger, faster, larger, and more powerful than the last. Their forms were vastly different – I only call them Dragons at Shisoberin's cue.
"The fifth and sixth Dragons could fly. They arrived together and fought together, and even if they were ponderous and ungainly in the air, that nullified the Archaeopteryx's primary advantage. All the fighters of the island were called then, including my comrades. The two Dragons were slain at immense loss of life, and Shisoberin himself was wounded. He called a meeting of the warrior-princes, and they agreed that this must have been a curse from the Conductor, that they needed to flee the island and find a new home. They were to take wing as soon as their King healed.
"All was lost when four Dragons came upon the island at once. I needn't describe the carnage – you can see it on the island. The Archaeopteryx fought valiantly, but death was a matter of when, not if. I was soaring on high, watching it unfold from above the Dragon's reach, or at least from higher than they wished to go while so much prey swarmed below. I watched as Shisoberin slew one final beast. Then, another Dragon tore him apart in its jaws, and the sky turned black.
"We hid in the caves for a week as the Dragons rampaged on the island. Finally, they left and we emerged to find all the beauty of the Archaeopteryx citadel destroyed. The remaining Archaeopteryx were gthsss, and attacked us on sight. We have been going out only sparingly since, hunting what prey we can and dodging the remaining Archaeopteryx. I believed we would spend our lives here, losing people one by one as we finally got caught, but by the Conductor's blessing, all my squad yet survives. And may continue to survive, with your help."
Hazō nodded, taking the story in. "The Dragons, what did they look like?"
"As I said, they varied immensely. Of the slain, a sea serpent, a living glass effigy, one of molten rock, another of living steel. Then there was one that continuously exploded and the final one slain was one that bent space around it to travel, something I have seen only Conjura do."
"Wasn't there seven killed?" Hazō asked.
Contorite scratched with a talon at the stone. "Hm. I don't remember that. Regardless, of the surviving Dragons, there was a red blob that strangled with tentacles, another that camouflaged itself and breathed fire, and the last was invisible except when light bounced off of it in certain ways."
"What happened to the bodies of the other dead ones?" Hazō asked.
"I do not know. The early ones were thrown into the sea, but they grew larger and harder to dispose of given the corruptive effect. The ones not disposed of disappeared in our week of hiding, I assume eaten by their fellows in their victory."
"And the Archaeopteryx, they're all…" Hazō struggled for a word, "mindless?"
"Yes, mindless," Contorite said slowly, "and more. They are soulless. Their essence was taken away."
"What does that mean?" Hazō asked.
"It means they're gthsss."
"I see," Hazō said. "Do you know anything more about the Dragons?"
"I do not. Shisoberin knew much, but none of his close advisors survive."
"How did the Archaeopteryx kill the Dragons?"
"The first few were slain with ordinary massing of strength, but the Dragons' abilities quickly grew beyond what any normal ninjutsu could defeat. Shisoberin was skilled in a particular ninjutsu that manipulated gravity itself. Before long, his became the only ninjutsu that could deal lasting damage, though other ninjutsu could slow or distract them."
"Got it," Hazō said with a sigh. "There are five Dragons now – there were six but we killed one – and no more have been appearing lately. I'll tell you about them later, but they're the same breed. I think I recognize the descriptions you gave of the survivors. I'd like to look around the battlefields, if you could point me to them. We need to end the threat of the Dragons and that means learning everything we can about them."
"You are welcome to," Contorite said. "You know the dangers, now. The Archaeopteryx will hunt you. Be thankful that only the smallest of their number survived the Dragon's hunt. Though… would you gain the assent of either the Arachnid Empress or the ship's crew below before you do so, so that we might make our escape from this island?"
"Sure. We'll go and check with them right now. We'll be back tomorrow. If you're ready then, you can move to the ship."
"Once again, you truly are a blessing from the Conductor, Gōketsu Hazō," Contorite said with a bob of his head. The other condors in the cave followed suit. "Thank you for the aid."
Hazō bowed, keeping his face as an iron mask. "Really, it's the least I can do."
Timeline for this update:
6 days prep for chakdar v2 research
Akane/Ino date somewhere in here. The scene sounded wonderful, but alas – the Archaeopteryx required a lot of room.
On the Seventh Path, traveling from Sanctuary to the northwest coast.
3 days producing 4 months of skywalkers.
On the Seventh Path, traveling from Sanctuary to the northwest coast.
Kumoairashī needed to travel with you to make sure Arachnids knew not to attack you (Kagome is too new to be broadly recognized as a summoner, and has been spending most of his time in Sanctuary besides), but she couldn't travel too far in one day (sadly, spiders are lower than both humans and dogs in stamina). Most of the day was actually spent on the Human Path.
3 days paddling to Archaeopteryx (no Human Path access for Hazō, Kagome had a contract on the ship).
Arrived on the third day, where the bulk of the update happened.
Total: 15 days.
Hazō spent 7 FP this update and gained 1 FP for winning a meaningful encounter.
Hazō is running headfirst into the chakra diffusion problem. Turns out, all those other sealmasters weren't idiots and chakra diffusion is actually really hard. Progress is slow but he has an advantage starting from the base chakdar. He thinks he's maybe a third of the way through.
XP Award: 81 + 10 (brevity) XP
GM-fun Award: 4 XP (Great plan. Date night was solid, Archaeopteryx scene involved actually going there and doing the thing, which I'm always a fan of.)
In an age when the world was not as we know it, in a place that is long since dust…
"No, no, no! A bō staff is a weapon for defending the faith—from any angle and at any time. Don't clutch it tight to your body like it's your lover's manhood!"
"Yes, Grandmaster! I'm so sorry, Grandmaster!"
On a cold, sunny winter's day, Raiyoke Hazuka watched (and cringed) as warrior monks who could lift her wizened grandmother off the ground with their little finger hunched their shoulders in shame, as if huddling to protect themselves from the biting wind of her words. Every morning, Hazuka praised the Sage that her heir training started before dawn, when nobody was around to hear the things Grandmother had to say to her.
"What was that tiny tap supposed to be, Munō? If you thrust in bed like you do in the field, you should save us all some time and go take a vow of celibacy!"
Hazuka winced at the burst of uproarious laughter, which she reckoned was half amusement and half relief that they weren't the ones who'd caught Grandmother's eye. There was no pleasing Grandmother—according to her, she'd met exactly one man in her life whose mastery of the staff satisfied her, and that man had been Hazuka's grandfather. Hazuka had never dared ask for details.
Fortunately for them all, a moment later Grandmother finally finished her yak's milk herbal tea (which she claimed to be good for the sinuses, and which Hazuka was half-convinced was what had caused her to shrivel up like an old fig to begin with).
"Don't just stand there, girl," Grandmother barked. "I've got dozens of documents to prepare for the big meeting, and if you think these old bones are going anywhere near the high shelves, you've got another thing coming."
"Yes, Grandmother," Hazuka said wearily (it was nearly noon, after all). "Why is this such a big deal, anyway? How enlightened can a barbarian really be?"
Grandmother gave an undignified snort. "Oh, I've got no real interest in those Hagoromo radicals. We'll argue back and forth over some points of doctrine—arguments I'll win because I've been running this abbey since their oldest sage was in his mother's belly—and then I'll send somebody to seduce whichever horny old goat they've picked to lead their delegation this time, and then in the morning they'll be putty in my hands for the trading and then they'll go home.
"No, the big meeting is with one of the fellows driving the carts." Grandmother winked.
Hazuka thought for a few seconds.
"You mean a man with a long shadow."
"Oh, yes." Grandmother chuckled. "I hope it's Shinobu again. Very long shadow, that man. Long and dexterous."
"I did not need to know that," Hazuka muttered, even as she knew Grandmother's selective deafness would filter out any complaints.
-o-
It had been a long time indeed since Nara Shinobu last made the long, gruelling, perilous journey to the Land of Lightning and the Sacred Peak where the Raiyoke Abbey perched precariously on the edge of a cliff (and the Raiyoke made a point of having visitors like him stay in dormitories with windows facing directly onto the abyss). While the last leg of the journey followed a well-trodden pilgrim route, and of course Raiyoke territory itself only contained the chakra monsters the Raiyoke wanted it to contain, everything else was horrible. The paths were labyrinthine, the monsters had unfamiliar powers, the Hagoromo "masters" were insufferable, and while Shinobu of course didn't share the biases of the more barbaric clans, having to pretend to be a commoner himself still set his teeth on edge.
After all of that, Raiyoke Chacha was nothing but a balm to his tattered soul. A little more stooped with age, maybe, and with a few more lines on her brow than he remembered, but the spark in her eyes was every bit that of the wildfire beauty who'd opened Shinobu's eyes to whole new worlds on his first journey abroad as part of the Mission.
"I see you haven't changed at all," he began once they were both seated and the harried-looking young woman by Chacha's side had fled after serving them both tea. "I suppose it's true what they say about the yak butter."
"Flattery will get you everywhere," Chacha cackled, "but for a change, let's put business before pleasure. The little dear's chambers are down the corridor from mine, and it wouldn't do to miss the opportunity to scandalise her when she gets back this evening."
Shinobu gave a sagely nod.
"Haven't changed at all," he repeated.
He reached into his travel sack. "I brought a souvenir for you from the heartlands of Fire. Perhaps we might enjoy it together tonight?"
Chacha picked up the hefty clay jug and listened to the sloshing inside. "Planning to get me drunk and take advantage of me, Shinobu?"
"Yes," Shinobu said seriously. "That is exactly the plan. I'm glad to see you're as sharp as ever.
"This is the literal fruit of one of our projects," he explained, "a vineyard in a little place called Tanzaku made with the aid of the Senju Clan and their growth ninjutsu. We had the usual series of tragic inevitabilities, of course, but once those were out of the way, we got four different clans to sign ceasefires with the Senju in exchange for a stable supply. The Akimichi are brokering more even as we speak."
"Senju?" Chacha raised her eyebrows. "The tree-eaters? The last Nara I talked to said they were a C-rank clan at best, bound to get extinguished within the century."
"That's what we thought," Shinobu said. "Their Bloodline Limit is terrible. You can tell it's not one of the originals. But it turns out that it comes with extraordinary vitality. Their powers may be laughable now, but our prognosticators believe that, if we can buy them time, the Senju will develop Wood Element ninjutsu that uses massive chakra investiture to achieve tactical-scale effects or even more. It might even become a consistent counter to the Uchiha's precision combat."
Chacha nodded. "Which you need because the Uchiha absolutely can't be allowed to become a dominant clan with that ideology."
"The Yamanaka are on it," Shinobu said. "Bringing them in is the biggest risk we've taken in the clan's history, but it's paying off magnificently. They cover our weaknesses and amplify our strengths. Being able to reshape alliances and start or end vendettas here and now takes a great deal of pressure off the long-term."
"In other words," Chacha concluded, "they do the work so you don't have to."
"I wasn't going to say it."
Shinobu took a sip of the tea before it grew cold. Lightning tea was horrible. It was the vilest drink Shinobu had ever had, and that was including Aunt Shibi's experimental cold medicine. However, he also knew that he would be less of a man in Chacha's eyes if he didn't swallow every drop with panache.
"Between the Yamanaka and the Senju, we're finally getting back on track," he said. "Two hundred years optimistically, which means three hundred years when you factor in plagues, famines, chakra monster hordes, and the rest of the usual."
His smile faded as he remembered the next part.
"That's all of the good news," he said. "The bad news is very bad."
Chacha's grin at his suffering disappeared too.
"The Tama's experiment has failed disastrously," Shinobu said. "That mega-clan they assembled didn't last three years before factionalism and paranoia tore it apart. Several clans were extinguished in the final power struggle, and the Tama's credibility is in tatters."
Chacha cursed under her breath, which was a sign of how badly she was taking it (usually, she'd curse at the top of her voice).
"We warned them they were being too hasty," she spat. "We said they needed to line up all the secondary factors."
"You know the Tama," Shinobu said. "Once they start getting obsessed with an idea…"
"Five in harmony surpasses one in perfection," Chacha recited regretfully. The creed of the Sage's true heirs, but also a reminder that any one of them alone was less than perfect, that each needed the others to compensate for its fatal flaw. (Shinobu did not intend to tell Chacha that, knowing that these words could never be spoken in the outside world, his clan lord had seen fit to plagiarise them for his new alliance.)
"You do have this generation's backup, right?" she asked.
"Fortunately," Shinobu said, "it didn't come to that. Still, it will be at least seven generations before the Tama can be taken seriously as a regional power.
"What about you? Anything before we get started on the documents?"
"We're having trouble with the latest project for Lightning," Chacha admitted after a second's reluctance. "We've appointed a Champion of the Faith for the entirety of Lightning several times now, and while the first couple brought a measure of coordination to the clans, the last two have both been raging egomaniacs who've prompted actual schisms from their enemies. Our religious authority is our primary tool. If we lose it, we lose centuries."
Shinobu frowned in thought. It was the opposite problem to Fire, where unplanned unity of thought was a disaster to be avoided at all costs (because 100% of the time it was the wrong thought).
"What if," he began after a minute of sipping the appalling tea (which did have the side effect of stimulating cognition as one's brain desperately sought to focus on anything but the taste), "you made it a precondition of the role that they surrender the original identity in which they are so invested? You could start by stipulating, say, that they symbolically replace their name with something utterly bland—a number, or perhaps a mere letter…"
"Sensei," Hazō said, "why don't you go check in with Kumokōgō? Ask if she's willing to host these fine people, then summon yourself back to the boat. We'll meet you there."
Kagome-sensei eyed him narrowly, looked at the condors, then looked back at Hazō. "But you'd be alone. With them."
"I'm pretty sure they don't want to hurt me," Hazō said. He didn't bother keeping his voice down, since Kagome-sensei hadn't. "Even if they did, I have unsummoned myself faster than a Dragon could breathe on me, and I'm pretty sure I can escape these guys as well. Besides, they have no reason to attack me and even if they did they're too smart to do it. They need us to get off the island. If they attack me for any reason then we leave them here and they live on in terrible conditions until they eventually get unlucky and get eaten by an Archaeopteryx. They need us, sensei."
"Maybe, but we don't need them." He glanced over at the condors. "No offense."
Contorite raised a wing to cut the other condors off before they could speak. "Let's no one take offense just yet," the black-winged bird said. "We can talk a bit more first."
"We actually do need them, sensei," Hazō said. "We need them to go to the Conclave and tell the various Clan Bosses that the Dragons are real and what happened to the Archaeopteryx Clan. Maybe that will get them all moving."
Kagome pondered that for a moment.
"Hmph." The older man turned back to the condors. "Fine. I'm going to leave you here with my student. If you so much as part his hair the wrong way, you won't need to worry about the big birds, or anything else. I'll stick you to the walls, cut your feathers off so you can't fly, and leave you here to die of thirst and hunger. Got it?"
That escalated quickly.
Hazō hurried to attempt repairs on the conversational breach. "What he means is—"
"What he means is clear, Hazō of Clan Gōketsu. Clear, and reasonable." Contorite turned to Kagome. "We have no quarrel with you or yours, human. We have every reason to work together."
"You say that now, but I know Hazō," Kagome said. "The minute I leave—"
"Sensei! Please, just go. I promise I'll be fine. I won't even be here for more than a few more hours; I have a meeting with Gaku later that I can't miss. Please, just go ask the Empress if she's okay with hosting these guys for a couple of days while they get their strength back." The meeting was real but not actually that important. Still, Hazō was happy to take the win if it would reassure his teacher.
Narrow-eyed glare.
"What about that thing?" the older man demanded, hooking a thumb back towards the entrance to the cave, where the now mindless Shisoroseri was still shrieking and tearing at the mountain in an attempt to get inside and eat his former companions.
"Boom, squish."
"Hmph. Fine. I'll meet you at the boat, but you better not take long."
Kagome gave the condors one last distrustful look, then disappeared back to the Human Path, from whence he would re-reverse summon himself back to the Arachnid Empress on the Seventh Path, then home to the Human Path, then back to the boat on the Seventh Path.
There were times when being a summoner was really cool.
"I have food if you would like it," Hazō said, pulling out a wad of storage seals and kneeling down to open them. "I don't know what condors eat so it may not be something appropriate, but there's quite a few options."
Suddenly, there were a lot of warm feathered bodies crowded close.
As it happens, condors eat meat and they aren't too fussy where it comes from—fish, beef, bison, chicken, they happily scarfed down everything Hazō had that wasn't a vegetable. By the time they were done and for the first time he could remember, he only had a week's worth of rations on him.
"Thank you, human," Conzenji said, giving a gluttonously satiated sigh and rubbing her belly. "It's been a long time on short rations."
"No trouble," Hazō said. "So long as you stay with a spider or dog that Kagome-sensei or I are contracted to, we'll be able to resupply you indefinitely."
"What was that about a Conclave?" Contorite asked. "You wanted us to go there and tell them of the Dragons?"
Hazō chewed on his cheek for a moment.
"Yes," he said at last. "It's complicated, and a long story, and I'd like to get us on the way first. Our boat isn't large enough to hold all of you at once. How should we handle that?" There was an obvious answer but he didn't want to seem bossy.
The sapient birds squawked their laughter. "Condors can stay aloft for long periods," Condo explained. "We can take turns resting on the boat for an hour or two while the rest stay on the wing."
"Cool. In that case, let's get moving."
o-o-o-o
Under the circumstances, Hazō felt comfortable breaking out the skywalkers. Their status was complicated in Leaf; it was known that all of the other major villages had gotten hold of them after the Battle of the Gods but that didn't mean that Asuma wanted them flashed around casually. Orders were 'use them if you deem it necessary but try not to find it necessary too often.' This was definitely and clearly in the 'necessary' category.
Granted, he didn't need to use the skywalkers for the entire trip. He had his drop gloves with him, so he snuck out of the cave, found a nice vertical cliff face, and hot-dropped down to sea level, sticking one hand to the wall with just enough chakra adhesion to slow his fall to something that a chakra-reinforced human body could sustain the impact of. He shifted hands every time his gloves started to smoke and arrived at sea level with only mild scorching.
Of course, before that could happen, there was the small matter of the giant bird ravening at the cave entrance. For many people, plummeting a thousand feet at eye-watering speed would have been the terrifying part of the operation. For Hazō, it was far more terrifying to learn what was necessary to get the animal formerly known as Shisoroseri out of the way. Hazō started off by firing half a dozen macerator shots at the Archaeopteryx, everything from weaponized pepper dust to chunks of spiked steel. The bird either deflected the attacks with its beak or simply absorbed them without comment.
From there, Hazō escalated, throwing a handful of blast disks one after another. Then an implosion bomb, then two more. At that point, Shisoroseri had multiple missing feathers, a thin rivulet of blood slithering from his left eye, and a fist-sized chunk knocked out of his beak. It was enough to make him decide that there had to be easier prey elsewhere and that this was an opportune moment to seek out said prey.
Once the way was clear, Hazō and the Condors evac'd as fast as they could, racing back to the boat that waited two miles off shore.
"Dog Summoner, be welcome!" chittered Komokogite, the senior of the spiders who had paddled the boat here from Arachnid. "Our Summoner guests you have found says."
Hazō looked to Kagome-sensei, who seemed very irritable about the entire situation.
"She said it was fine," the senior sealmaster grumbled. "They can come wait in her place. She promised them safe passage so long as they don't harm her people or us."
The other condors were soaring a mile or two in the air, high enough that it was hard to pick them out. Contorite had been flying low, staying near enough to Hazō to hear the conversation with the spiders.
"You and your empress are most kind," he said, nodding his head respectfully to the spider. "We had thought ourselves doomed. You have saved us."
"Welcome you, I do," Kumokogite said, waving her pedipalps. "Rest on my vessel you may. Summoner Kagome says to their own Path the humans are going so to more space make. Three of you we can manage, I think. Meet us back at the Orbularium they will when to it we return."
Contorite cocked his head. "Meet...ah, you both have contractees there?"
"We do," Hazō said. "I'll see you in Arachnid territory in two days."
"Three better will be," Kumokogite said. "Against us the currents and the wind from here are."
"Three, then," Hazō said. His stomach clenched at the thought of waiting an extra day to unburden himself. He really wanted to get this over with.
"In three days, then," Contorite said. "Thank you, Summoner. My condo is in your debt, and I feel certain that the great Conjura will wish to repay it as well."
"No she won't," Kagome-sensei said. "After all—yow!" He glared at the pinchy fingers of his nephew.
"Thank you," Hazō said, not looking at his teacher. "I look forward to talking with you in three days. Travel safe. Sensei, let's return."
o-o-o-o
"Greetings again, Dog Summoner," Contorite said. "Is your friend coming?"
"He's not, I'm afraid," Hazō said. "He and a team are going to Nagi Island to carry out some research."
"I see," said Contorite, dipping his beak into a glass that a spider artisan had constructed specifically for him, in order to accommodate his beak.
The Orbularium had been redecorated, which was apparently okay if and only if the Empress personally ordered it. The basics were obviously still the same—enormous sphere made out of silk thin enough that sunlight could drip slowly through, taut webbing making a steel-hard floor across most of the equator, plenty of other webs scattered around, spiders rushing hither and thither on unknown business. Now, however, there were plants scattered about. They rested in semi-spherical planters, some of which dangled from web strands that came down the ceiling and some of which stood atop 'poles' that were actually tight spirals of silk coming up from the floor. Also, the silver-grey of the silk that created the Orbularium was now a riot of colors, but only in patches. Hazō wasn't sure if the color was being spread around piecemeal and this was merely the beginning stages, or if the tightly-constrained swatches were the spider equivalent of paintings—rectangles of color creating a world confined within a frame. If so, the Arachnids had clearly mastered Neo-Incomprehensibilism.
"Sad at the Summoner's absence I shall be," Kumokōgō said, sipping her tea with a noisy slurp. It was hard to sip tea quietly when your mouth was made from nightmares. "Not appear at all shall he?"
"He'll be checking in periodically, but he's traveling for the next few hours," Hazō said, grateful that the Empress was going along with the script they had worked out together. "In the meantime, there are some things I felt it was important to go over with you, Contorite."
"This was clear from your reticence on the island," the bird said. "Your friend kept attempting to tell us something and you kept hurting him until he went silent."
Hazō winced. It was an unkind way to describe a pinch or squeeze, but it was not an inaccurate one.
"Clearly, it's about home," Contorite said. "I assume you didn't want us to know because you felt that we needed to focus on the immediate future and knowing whatever this truth is would have distracted us, or caused us to break down emotionally. Hence why I did not ask, nor allow my condo to ask. And now the nature of this meeting tells me that the news is not merely distracting, it is catastrophic, and that you think it likely to send me into a rage. I have to admit, I am struggling to think what such news might be."
Hazō stared at the bird person in surprise. "How did you put all that together just from Kagome-sensei not being here?"
"Oh, your friend's absence was not the primary clue," Contorite said. "Although I suppose it makes sense. You clearly want to manage how this news is conveyed and he appears to be terrible at such things. No, it was the environment." He gestured to the conference table between them, along which were spread a variety of snacks and drinks. "This room did not have furniture in it on my first appearance, immediately after we arrived yesterday. Now it contains a table long enough that I cannot reach the items on the other end, instead of something that would make sense for a meeting of merely three people. There are only three tea mugs on the table so the extra size does not suggest more guests arriving later. You have positioned yourself at the opposite end from me, out of my reach, with the Empress, your ally, between us. Her guards are closer than they were when I paid my respects yesterday, but they are not close enough to restrain me before I could launch an attack on Her Majesty, were I so completely insane as to attempt to attack a Clan Lady in her own domain. No, the table and the Empress and the guards are here for your protection, not hers."
"I don't suppose you ever met Nara Shikaku, did you?" Hazō asked.
"Is that a human?"
"He was." A wave of sadness swept across Hazō. "Never mind. It's just that he had a habit of making sweeping deductions from small facts like that. Yes, I'm afraid the news is bad."
He took a breath and braced himself. "On the island, you said that you and your condo owed me a debt. You do not. In truth, I owe a debt to you and every other condor. I never intended to harm you or anyone else, but my actions accidentally contributed to the genocide of your people. That is a fact that I deeply, deeply regret and wish to make amends for."
"I...see." Contorite looked down, fiddling with his tall, thin mug. After several very long seconds, he looked up again. "And what were these actions?"
Huh. This was going better than expected. Hazō had honestly been expecting to be fighting for his life at this point.
"You saw the skywalker seals that I used to cross from the island to the boat," Hazō said.
"Yes. You said that they were faster than water-walking."
"The other man you met, Kagome-sensei? He is my uncle and my teacher." That was the simple version, anyway. He wasn't going to go into the actual nature of the convoluted Gōketsu clan relationships. "We invented those seals together. I had the idea for them, he implemented it. We also invented the skytower seals." That was another drastic oversimplification but keeping things simple and moving quickly through the story seemed like a good idea right now.
Contorite froze. "The Judging Eyes," he whispered. "That was what the scaled scum called them. The Pantokrator's Judging Eyes. It gave them the ability to bypass our ground-based defenses, place protective shields over their encampments, and reach our nests atop the highest peaks. Those things are why my people were enslaved, and you created them."
"Yes. I created them, and I sold them to the pangolins. At first, I didn't realize what they were doing with them. Once I figured it out, I stopped supplying them as soon as I had the power to do so."
"Why? Why would you do such a thing? What had the Condor Clan ever done to you that you should enable those monsters this way?"
Hazō winced. "It's...complicated," he said. "I didn't realize what the Pangolin Clan were when I first met them. Well, actually—" He broke off and shook his head. "Let me do this in order, and with the context."
Contorite snorted. "I shall wait with preenéd feathers to hear what context might excuse this."
"First, you need to understand what the Human Path is like," Hazō said, hoping the bird man would let him get through the explanation. "It's similar to the Seventh in some ways, different in others. Where you have many intelligent species—Condors, Arachnids, and so on—we have only one: humans. Where each of your clans appears to be relatively united, humans are fractious and make war among ourselves. Each of your species has one Clan with one leader. We have five major nations, each ruled by a Kage, plus dozens of smaller nations scattered around. Your lands are relatively safe; the animals are not serious threats to you and the plants never try to kill you."
"Spoken like someone who has never seen a friend eat deathcap mushrooms," Contorite said, gallows humor in his voice.
Hazō gestured impatiently. "Fine, you have some poisonous plants. I have plants that shoot spears through your neck in order to drain your blood, vines that will stick themselves in through your skull and use your corpse as a puppet in order to hunt, and our primary food crop needs to be harvested regularly or it will grow poison claws and walk across land in order to hunt our farmers. And that's just the plants."
Contorite stared at him.
"Yeah, I know, it's fucked up," Hazō said. "I never realized that until I came to the Seventh Path. To me it's always been just the way things are."
"I see," the bird man said slowly. "You said before that you sold the Eyes to the Pangolins. You needed resources to protect your village?"
"My team, not my village, but yes." He took a breath. He had spent three days talking with Kei, Mari, and finally even Ruri, the Condor Summoner. This was the part that was probably going to go badly, but everyone had eventually agreed that it needed to be said regardless. It was too big a trap to leave in one's wake.
"This next part is going to be a problem for you," Hazō said.
Contorite cocked his head. "More of a problem than meeting someone who enabled the murder of my father, my wife, my chicks, and all but one of my sisters?"
"Um. Okay, well, here it is: humans who can use chakra are called ninja, those who can't are called civilians. Ninja mostly live in groups called 'Hidden Villages', each ruled by a Kage as I said before. The Kage sends us on missions, much like your Clan Boss might send you. Occasionally, a ninja will feel that their Kage has broken faith with them and will sever their ties with their village. They leave and don't go back. It's called 'going missing' and someone who does it is a 'missing-nin'. Missing-nin are looked down on, to say the least." Four hours of conversation had gone into that one sentence. There was simply no way to quickly convey the cultural associations tangled into the short word 'missing-nin', but the Clans of the Seventh Path had feelings that aligned closely enough that the differences weren't critical.
"Let me guess," Contorite said. "You and your team went missing. You were struggling to survive in that hell dimension you call the Human Path. You invented skywalkers and the Judging Eyes as a way to sleep high up where your plants couldn't eat you. Somehow, you met the Pangolin Summoner and you arranged a deal: you would supply them with the Judging Eyes in return for safety and probably wealth. You knew that the Pangolins were butchering my kind but you didn't care enough to do anything about it until you had achieved enough safety and wealth. Eventually you felt yourself sufficiently well-off that you could get around to not enabling the murder of chicks too young to fly and the enslavement and maiming of those unfortunate enough to be captured."
"That's...not wrong," Hazō said. "You put it together very quickly."
Contorite waved a wing dismissively. "You laid the pieces out quite carefully."
"Hopefully the last of the big shocks," Hazō said. "The Pangolin Summoner is my adopted sister. It's complicated—she was born to a rival clan, then she was my teammate, then we formed the Gōketsu clan, then she married into the Nara clan. Regardless, she's still their Summoner. She's the one who recognized what the Pangolins were doing, and she's the one who actually cut ties. I wanted to do it but couldn't at the time because I wasn't in charge. She did it, unilaterally, because she is brave and good, and I hope that when you eventually meet her you will remember that it was never her fault and that she has done everything she can to stop it and reverse it."
"Oh?"
"Yes. It's not what she wants, or what I would guess you want, and it can never be enough, but she's trying. She has argued with Pantsā to improve the treatment of the prisoners, she has moderated some of his actions. She isn't the ruler of the Pangolins and she has no power to enforce her will, only to convince people. She's done what she can to make things better, but it isn't enough and will never be enough."
"I see."
Silence lingered.
"What are your intentions now?" Contorite demanded at last. "What do you intend for me and my people?"
"First, I want to respect your agency," Hazō said. Mari had been impressed when he said that should be the focus. She had even ruffled his hair, something she hadn't done in far too long. It had been...nice. A reminder of happier, simpler times, before Hazō was responsible for quite so much murder and genocide and torture.
"My agency?" Contorite said, amused. "Pray tell, what agency do I have at the moment?"
"'Each moment grants us infinite choice, although nearly always nearly all of the choices are doomful'," Hazō said. "It's a quote from a human philosopher. Point is: yes, I have ideas that I could suggest. I don't want to force them on you."
"To listen his thoughts to likely wise is," Kumokōgō said. "Crafty his webs are spun. A good heart behind them."
Hazō startled. Kumokōgō had acknowledged in the pre-meeting discussion that she was here mostly here to act as a moderating influence and prevent actual violence, and to that end she would make herself unobtrusive. Hazō had politely questioned just how unobtrusive a spider the size of a small hut could be. She had chittered her amusement and said 'evert my presence shall I.'
Apparently, it was extremely difficult to pay attention to a Clan Boss who had turned her metaphysical aura inside out. Hazō had been aware of her presence in the room the whole time, technically, and he felt that he probably would have noticed had she moved, but until she spoke she had had zero importance to his awareness.
Hazō promised himself that he would never ever admit to anyone just how much satisfaction he took from the fact that, when the Empress spoke, Contorite jumped just as much as Hazō did.
"Badly done by, your Clan has been," Kumokōgō said. "Hazō some of the blame shares, yes, but the true blame lies with Pantsā. Pantsā is your enemy; when Hazō speaks, do not away turn an ally because of mud on their chitin."
She gestured to Hazō with one foreleg. "Hazō to expiate past wrongs wishes, and therefore seeks to work with Condors. The Arachnid Clan owns no stake in the conflict, yet wish we to ally with you and your condo. Seen you have the Dragons. More there are, more powerful than those who slew the Archaeopteryx. If eat the Arachnids, more powerful yet will they become. You saw the impossibility of facing the Dragons as they were, before fly they could. What then face them with you shall when they fly with the power of Archaeopteryx and also weave and sting and swim with the might of Arachnid?
"The other Clans unite with us must. For months, delay they have made. A prior condor came and confirmed that Dragons exist, yet still they delay. Now you come, having seen a proud and powerful Clan made chthsss. You must to the Conclave go and assure them of what has been seen. Hazō guide and guard can be. His sister your invitor can be.
"Honor in this is, Contorite. Save my people, save your people, save all the people. Plus, Conjura's fame to me has come. She flies, she bends space and time, she sees far and strikes hard? Ideal she would be to fight the Dragons with Arachnid weavers at her side to create skyslicers and float bombs in her support. If the downdraft of her wings can force a Dragon to the ground where I and the other Rulers may attack it, victory we might see. If she is the cause of victory saving all Clans, how much support would win she? Certain I am that other Clans are fearful of the Pangolins and their actions, yet wish not to attract the scaled ones' eyes. If, as it sounds, they do not act, it is because a focus they lack. Grant us victory led by the mighty Conjura, then let Conjura demand her reward as freedom for her enslaved people. Pantsā either grant her request must or refuse it before his peers. No other chance will there be in your lifetime to bring many Clan Rulers together with both Conjura and Pantsā in attendance and the other Rulers having immediately before allies in battle been. Such an event your best chance is to gain freedom for your people. Attendance to this event you shall not gain without speaking up by Hazō, the Dog Summoner, and his sister, the Pangolin Summoner. They eager are to this help grant if it you will accept. Help all of us, will you?"
Contorite seemed flummoxed. "I...I..."
Hazō held his breath, hoping against hope that this would work. Kumokōgō had listened carefully when he explained his thoughts and how he hoped she would join in them. Having her make the pitch would be much better than having Hazō do it, and if Contorite accepted then he would by implication be accepting that he needed to be on civil (and, importantly, nonviolent) terms with Hazō and Kei. Not only had Kumokōgō been willing, she had suggested some tweaks to the language. Granted, they came out in her odd spiderish syntax, but they still worked well.
Contorite stopped and blew out a breath, shaking himself so that his feathers rustled and then fell back into place.
"Yes," he said, his voice firm. "I will work with you. Hazō, I acknowledge that you did not intend to cause the massacre of my people, but you did. I cannot give you forgiveness for that yet, but I am willing to give you a chance to earn it. More importantly, I am willing to work with you to face this greater problem and put up sorting out our business until the world is safe."
"Thank you, Contorite," Hazō said, a smile blooming across his face. "That is all I could ask for."
Author's Note: Apparently, a group of condors is called a 'condo'. Whoever comes up with collective nouns was feeling lazy that day.
This update covered 3 days.
XP AWARD: 15
Brevity XP: 3
Vote time! What to do now?
Voting ends on Wednesday,
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Chapter 556: The Tactical Utility of Reconciliation
When Hazō found Mari, she was engaged in the very important task of stress-testing the newly-decorated floor of the Gōketsu atrium. So far, the wave patterns engraved into the granite by a talented civilian craftsman (who had decided that the curves would help break up the natural blocky squareness of the space, and then, in a touch of kindness, that this particular style would remind the residents of home) were successfully enduring, but Hazō could make no promises that this would last if Mari kept pacing back and forth. Her face was set in a tiny scowl, and, he noted absently, her eyes were a pale, ghostly blue.
"Something on your mind?"
"Keiko," Mari said, pausing reluctantly. "I'm brainstorming how to reconcile with her."
"You are?" Hazō asked.
"Yes," Mari said. "She's our leash on Ami, and I have no idea how strong that leash is, or what its conditions are, and I can't find out because Keiko refuses to even be in the same room as me if she can help it."
"You could ask Snowflake," Hazō said the first thing that came into his head.
"I'm not that cruel," Mari said, settling down on the sofa, "at least not to people I care about. Maybe if it was an emergency, I might, but asking Snowflake to think about Keiko's relationship with Ami when she doesn't have to…"
"No," Hazō agreed, joining her. "That was thoughtless.
"You know," he went on after a second, "I'm not sure I can provide much good advice on this subject—or I'd have done it already—but using her preferred name might be a good start. It's not like you get anything out of not doing it."
Mari shifted uncomfortably on the sofa.
"You're right," she said. "It's petty and I'm better than that. It's just… why does she have to be such a child? She knows I did the best thing I could. I know I did the best thing I could. But instead of sucking it up and moving on from a natural disaster that just happens because our lives are like that, she decides to blame the whole thing on me and cut ties. And I'm supposed to what, humour her?
"No, I can't even do that, because obviously anything I say could be a manipulative lie, and who cares about all the trust I'd built up over years of treating her like…"—Mari hesitated—"you get the idea."
"I get the idea," Hazō said. It was a collision of two issues which individually might maybe have been eventually fixable by a social genius like Mari—but with the basic problem of basic trust being broken in Isan amplified by the intense emotional damage from the Orochimaru incident (in which Mari made it clear that, under pressure, she would protect others by risking Kei and Kei agreed it was the rational thing to do), Hazō couldn't imagine how they'd reach the point of good-faith negotiations, never mind finding a solution.
Still, something niggled at the back of his mind. If there was a solution, it needed to involve some factor neither of them had considered. Was there anything like that, or was it just wishful thinking from someone who missed his family as it once was?
"What would it take?" he asked. "I mean, what do you think are the specific conditions under which this would all go away?"
Mari shrugged irritably. "She'd have to accept that me putting her at some risk in order to save your life which was at practically 100% risk doesn't mean I think she's a sacrificial pawn or something. Even when she's acting like a child, she's family, and she's only not family in her own head. I did it because I had to, not because I don't love her."
"And the other thing?"
Mari sat there for a while, thinking. Her expressions changed slightly, like she was having some kind of internal debate.
"She'd have to decide she accepts my apology for Hidden Swamp. Which doesn't even mean anything, because I'm not that person, and there's no point in me apologising for that person, and you'd think that would be obvious after everything I've done for her."
Hazō nodded uncertainly. Mari's relationship with the Heartbreaker was complicated, and he fully endorsed Mari's belief that she'd transcended that identity (in fact, he'd played a central role in convincing her of it), but he wasn't sure identity and responsibility were the same thing like that. Even if Hidan came to him tomorrow weeping bitter tears and swearing that he now understood the value of human life and would never touch a three-bladed death scythe again, it wouldn't exempt him from having to make amends for his crimes (and it was lucky Hidan was seemingly immortal, because there was no way he could do that in a single human lifetime).
Of course, by any reasonable standard, Mari had made amends, getting Kei into Leaf where she enjoyed a life far happier (and probably longer) than anything she could have had back in Mist—
Something about that thought snagged on his mind, like a barbed harpoon getting stuck in a chakra minnow.
There were two things that Kei could plausibly blame Mari for when it came to being kidnapped and taken to the Swamp of Death. One was the Swamp of Death itself, where Kei had very nearly died (and, according to Mari herself, would have died for certain without her intervention). The other… was Ami, whose distressingly codependent relationship with Kei was at the root of Mari's most immediate problem to begin with.
And if Kei had come this close to passive suicide as a result of believing she'd lost Ami forever, what had happened to the girl left behind?
"Mari," he asked, "did you ever apologise to Ami for kidnapping Kei?"
Mari stared at him as if he'd just proposed himself having passionate carnal relations with Orochimaru as a way to earn the snake-man's favour.
"I- I'm not- I didn't- We don't have that kind of relationship."
Hazō blinked. "You don't have the kind of relationship where you apologise?"
"We don't," Mari said, growing more confident. "You don't apologise for taking an opponent's piece in a game, or for the stratagems you use, or for your successes or your failures. There are some people with whom an apology is just a sign of weakness, or would be if you could believe it to begin with. It's not something I'd expect you to understand—and maybe it's better that you don't.
"Besides," she added, "she threatened my life. I'm not the one who should be apologising here."
Hazō wondered if Ami felt the same way about their relationship. If she was silently waiting for an apology for the Swamp of Death just like Kei—or, for that matter, if she felt an apology was owed her for Mari risking Kei's life—then this whole thing would be another order of magnitude more awful than it already was. It was best not to even think about it.
"You know what," he decided, "why don't we just forget about this for now and talk about a different kind of Ami-related problem? Come on, let's find somewhere more secure."
-o-
"To recap, though I doubt you've forgotten," Hazō said. "One happy day when I was with Kei and Ami, Ami deduced the basics of WHOOSH based on minor details I'd let slip, plus however it is that Ami's mind works. In retrospect, I have a horrible feeling she just made a clever guess and waited for me to confirm it, but let's not go there. After that, I promised her that I'd loop her in, with conditions, if she was ever in a position to take advantage of it.
"She is now in a position to take advantage of it. I can't see her spreading the secret if I change my mind and refuse, because that would weaken Kei, but I can't see it leading anywhere good either. She hasn't pushed for it yet, maybe because she's feeling guilty about the whole death threat incident, but it's only a matter of time."
"If she hasn't pushed for it," Mari interrupted, "it's nothing to do with guilt. It just means she doesn't have the Shadow Clone Technique yet, so instead she's biding her time—and for all we know, using it to line up pieces to make life difficult for us if we try to refuse, because it's what I'd do."
Hazō nodded. "That makes sense. Still, I was wondering if you could think of any conditions it would make sense to add. For example, would 'have to convince Mari it's a good idea' work?"
"I've thought about this before," Mari said. "There are two issues we run into with conditions. First is enforcement. What she does with her shadow clones is private, and has to be absolutely private because that's how WHOOSH OPSEC works. Unless you want to stand over her all day every day monitoring what her clones are training, which is impractical and easily weaselled out of, you can't, say, tell her not to train her manipulation skills because you want to get your manipulation resistance up first."
"I was thinking of something like that," Hazō admitted.
"That one wouldn't work anyway," Mari said. "She's a social spec. She goes on the kind of missions where her ability to manipulate literally determines whether she lives or dies—especially now that she's decided that her career advancement means dancing with the likes of Akatsuki. She's not going to accept any condition that lowers her chances of survival.
"Which brings us smoothly to the second issue, which is Kei. If Ami doesn't like our conditions, she can just go to Kei. If she can persuade Kei that WHOOSH is a matter of life and death for her, and that we're withholding it despite having promised to cut her in—"
"I specified at the time that there would be conditions," Hazō objected.
"If she can persuade Kei," Mari repeated pointedly, "then Kei will do whatever it takes to get it for her, and Kei has so many different ways to put pressure on us it's not even funny. What happened to those happier days when she was just a gloomy little girl following at my heels like a devoted puppy?"
Translation: the days when Kei was so broken that her desperate need for an Ami substitute had somehow morphed into romantic love. Hazō hoped Mari was being flippant.
"And that," Mari said, "is assuming she plays fair. It would be far easier for her to just tell Ami the whole thing herself. What are you going to do, execute her?"
"She needs Noburi," Hazō pointed out. "None of this works without the chakra refills."
Mari rolled her eyes. "She'll just go to the other Vampiric Dew user living on this estate and bribe him using her influence in Mist. Or invite a new Wakahisa in just for herself. We've opened that door pretty wide for her now. As a bonus, she'll then be able to cut in as many people as she likes, and we won't have any leverage to stop her because WHOOSH isn't a clan secret."
Hazō winced. He had not thought of that at all.
"So that limits us in the conditions we can set," Mari said, "pretty badly. In particular, 'convince Mari it's a good idea' isn't going to work, because we'll both know that if I say no, she goes straight to Plan B, and that Plan B is bad for everybody, but it's a lot worse for the Gōketsu than it is for her.
"Are you starting to see why I want Kei on our side rather than just hers?"
"Kei is on our side," Hazō objected. "The fact that you are having difficulties with her doesn't make her any less of a Gōketsu, just like me trying to befriend Ami doesn't mean you have to… stop feeling whatever it is you're feeling towards her."
"But if this comes down to a conflict between me and Ami in any way," Mari said, "or if Ami can paint it like a conflict between her and me, Kei as she is now isn't going to hesitate."
"And you can't get Kei on your side because there's no way you can convince her of your sincerity so she forgives you," Hazō concluded.
"Right. The curse of the social spec."
The curse of the social spec. According to Mari, it was why so many of them were messed up even before they hit jōnin. How were you supposed to have normal human relationships when those around you thought you could manipulate them into thinking whatever you wanted, and might be doing so right now? Even Hazō only had absolute trust in Mari's motivations, not in whether she was subtly steering him towards what she thought was best for him at any given time. Per her own testimony, you couldn't turn off social training any more than you could turn off your sense of touch. It was why social specs had a tendency to drift towards each other, even though their relationships inevitably ended up over-complicated and warped in a variety of ways. The only way to resist somebody else's curse was to be cursed yourself.
The only way to resist the curse…
Hazō had an idea.
It was, without question, the worst idea he'd ever had. Worse than inviting Orochimaru to join the Gōketsu. Worse than sharing Akane's Elemental Mastery with Team Ino-Shika-Chō. Worse than 'pretty damn far'. It was madness. Lunacy. It had "Armageddon Initiative" written all over it.
There was no possible choice but to give it life.
"You know," Hazō said, "there is one way you can start to reconcile with Kei."
Mari raised an eyebrow.
"Hit me."
"Now, I'm not saying this is necessarily possible," Hazō said as his survival instinct hurriedly started to catch up up to what he was doing, "much less claiming it's a good idea. I'm definitely not suggesting that you do it. In fact, I am not suggesting anything and claim no responsibility for any outcomes of you acting or not acting on what I've come up with."
"Out with it, Hazō. You know disclaimers won't save you from my revenge if I decide it's called for."
Hazō swallowed.
"You could use Ami as a go-between."
Mari stared at him as if he'd just proposed himself now bearing Orochimaru's child as a way to earn the snake-man's favour.
"Hear me out," Hazō said. "Your lying skills are several zillion orders of magnitude above Kei's ability to detect lies, and she knows it. But they're not several zillion orders of magnitude above Ami's."
"Not several zillion," Mari agreed.
"If you tell Ami you're sorry, and Ami believes that you're sorry, which she will because she's confident in her ability to spot lies, then she can pass it on to Kei—and if Ami tells her, Kei will believe it without question."
"You want me. To apologise. To Ami." If scepticism were a form of heat, Hazō would have been ashes on the stone floor.
Hazō raised his hands in an urgent placating motion. "I'm observing that you have the option of apologising to Kei, via Ami. Whether you want to apologise to Ami for anything, or whether you want to demand an apology from her for threatening to kill you, are all completely separate issues on which I'm not going to comment because I realise I'm on really shaky ground as it is."
Mari nodded. Hazō wasn't sure to which part.
"With that said," he added, "If it is possible for you two to reconcile, or at least to clear the air between you, and I realise you might not think it is, or might not want to even if it is, that would be massively beneficial to you, her, Kei, me, and for that matter any future WHOOSH-related negotiations that might stand to gain from goodwill between the Gōketsu and Ami."
"And you really think this would have a chance of working?" Mari asked.
"Assuming you can persuade Ami to cooperate," Hazō said, "I do. After that, all you have to do is to sincerely tell Kei you're sorry for Hidden Swamp and all your biggest problems will be solved."
"All I have to do is sincerely tell Kei I'm sorry for Hidden Swamp," Mari repeated in the voice of a woman heading to the gallows.
"I'm sure it will be fine."
Hazō smiled the smile of a sealmaster whose ridiculously dangerous and ill-judged experiment had miraculously succeeded without causing any new problems whatsoever.
-o-
You have received 3 + 1 (Brevity) = 4 XP.
-o-
Later that day, you offered a distracted-sounding Mari your other WHOOSH-related thoughts. Her feedback is as follows:
Having Noburi out of the village is not under the Gōketsu's control; they can carry out individual Gōketsu activities with the Hokage's permission, but the expectation is that any given ninja is on the mission roster and at the Hokage's disposal at any time. Unfortunately, Noburi in particular is likely to be closely monitored in this regard. Mari personally doesn't think he's as big a trump card at this stage—summons have hard counters and there's been plenty of time for people to prepare them—but that's not something you can demonstrate to Asuma without any wars.
Misinformation in general is something that Mari is fond of, and she thinks you're thinking along the right lines there. However, the idea that the Gōketsu have been providing a dangerous product to Leaf ninja at large is disastrous, especially given the scale on which you did it in wartime. Knowingly risking the war effort is treason; doing it through carelessness is still very, very bad, especially if people start asking to what extent Gōketsu water contributed to Leaf losses.
Getting jōnin back in the field is even less under the Gōketsu's control; the Hokage pays close personal attention to the village's few jōnin and their activities. Mari thinks "jōnin tournament" is a very Hazō idea; specifically, it's very original and clever, but no jōnin will ever unnecessarily reveal their abilities, much less in front of an enemy.
The ragged man ran along the beach, the pounding beat of his footsteps hammering at the doors in his brain with urgent command that they yield up their secrets.
"Faster, grub!" he shouted to thin air. "Yes, Proc..." He trailed off, shaking his head for three steps and frowning for ten.
"Down and do fifty, grub!" he shouted again.
He stopped running and dropped into pushup position. "Yes, Pr..." He shook his head and dipped down and up again in an Academy-perfect pushup. "Ha! Yes, Proctor! Yes, Proctor Inasa!" He started hammering out more pushups.
After ten pushups he stopped in front-leaning rest and started laughing. The laughter swelled until he flopped down on his back.
"Yes, Proctor Inasa!" he said, pointing at the sky. "I'm not Inasa, you stinking grub! What's my name, Joji?! Proctor, that's Joji over there! I'm Jiraiya!"
He rolled up to his knees, grabbed two fistfuls of sand and shook them at the sky. "I AM JIRAIYA! I AM JIRAIYA OF THE SANNIN! FUCK YOU! YOU WILL NOT TAKE ME FROM MYSELF!"
"Student of Hiruzen," he whispered, dropping the sand and looking down at his empty hands. "Born of no man, grew up in the Matron's orphanage where Aunty Kobayashi taught me my letters and told me to journal. Broke Yamato's leg, pissed off Sensei. Burned the Busujima compound to the ground in '36, got the...the..." His hands clenched. "Got the...something. Papers! They were red... No, they were white but they had a red wax seal!" His face split in a grin. "HAH! It was a wax seal! The pages were white! The wax was red! And it wasn't '36, it was '37! I burned out the Busujima in '37!"
He rolled on his back again, kicking his hands and feet in the air like a spastic dying cockroach and cackling madly. "His name was Proctor Inasa! He was a chūnin with a scar on his chin and a missing left earlobe. I studied under him at the Academy and I was a jōnin and he never was! I was his commanding officer in the field!" He lay back, the energy going out of him as he struggled once more. "He came to me, wanted to work for me...during the war? No... Maybe? It was the intelligence division. He wanted into the intelligence division. When I was the head of it." He smiled again. "After the war, then. He wanted to work for me, and I accepted him and bossed him around!"
Still lying on his back, he raised both arms and twisted his fingers through handseals. "Boar, Tiger! That's the Swamp of the Underworld! Ram, Monkey, Horse, Ram! That's the Earth Clone! Dragon, Snake, Ox, Horse, Monkey, Boar, Snake! Lightning Dragon Tornado! Ox, Monkey, Hare, Rat, Boar, Bird, Ox, Horse, Bird, Rat, Tiger, Tiger, Dog, Snake, Ox, Ram, Snake, Boar, Ram, Rat, Yang Water, Monkey, Dragon, Bird, Ox, Horse, Ram, Tiger, Monkey, Hare, Boar, Dragon, Ram, Rat, Ox, Monkey, Bird, Yang Water, Rat, Boar, Bird! Water Dragon Bullet!"
He waved an arm wildly as though smearing paint across the sky. "Woosh! See that, you stupid cloud? You would have been torn apart by my fearsome dragon jutsu, but I'm not giving you any chakra! You can't have my chakra!"
He kipped up to his feet, chiseled abs flexing. The spare flesh had been pared away from his body, leaving nothing but muscle stretching his skin to bursting. His soles were toughened and thick from barefoot living on sand for months or years or decades and his hands were calloused from hard-style taijutsu practice against trees and jury-rigged dummies. He leaned back and thrust both fists at the sky, every line of his body tight.
"I AM JIRAIYA OF THE SANNIN!" he bellowed. "I AM HERE, AND I AM MYSELF, AND YOU! WILL! NOT! HAVE! ME!"
Author's Note: Voting remains closed. I'm going to write the plan for chapter 558, which should be out tomorrow as normal, but this kept knocking on my brain.
"Gooood morning, Gaku!" Hazō said, striding through the door with an insufferable grin and plopping into his chair. He dropped his feet up on the desk, crossed at the ankle, and took a drink from the mug of spiced tea he had brought with him.
"You seem cheery this afternoon, sir," Gaku noted, the faintest hint of dryness in his tone surely having no resemblance to criticism of his lord's sandals on the desk, or the fact that his lord was wrong about which part of the day it was.
"I am! I am indeed. Things are finally starting to break our way." He gestured widely with his mug. "Sunny days are here again, Gaku. Potential abounds, the future is brightening by the moment."
"Oh?"
"Indeed!" He knocked the rest of the mug back, then set it on the desk and slid it away. "Gaku, what would you say is the most important project we have going?"
"Saving the world from the Dragons, sir?"
"Okay, that's fair, but no. Try again."
"Ensuring that your relationships with Lady Akane and Lady Yamanaka do not explode, thereby causing massive drama within the clan and potentially a clan war with the largest power bloc in Leaf?"
"Don't be snide and no, not that one."
"Ensuring that the pig-faced, tiny-brained jackanapes who rules the Hagoromo clan ends up burning forever in a pit of torment?"
"First, dark. Second, very dark for you. Third, no. Try again."
"I give up, sir."
"Necromancy, Gaku! Necromancy! We're going to bring Jiraiya back! C'mon, you know this."
"Yes sir. I can see how resurrecting one of the greatest heroes of the Leaf and our clan's founder would indeed be a priority."
"Tell me about it. Once he's back I can dump all this paperwork on him and actually have some fun."
"Yes sir. I take it there has been progress?"
"There has indeed, indeediest deed."
"Would this have anything to do with Lord Kagome's return, sir?"
"Once again: indeediest deed! He got back from that rift to the afterlife which we are going to reinflate so that we can haul Jiraiya out of there. He took measurements while he was there and he's confident that our idea is going to work! The basic design for our rift reinflation seal is solid and he's confident we can make it work."
"I seem to recall you saying that it would need to be used from both sides of the rift simultaneously, sir."
Hazō waved dismissively. "Don't harsh my buzz, Gaku."
"Apologies, sir."
"Sure, there are some minor details to work out—"
"Such as how to get the seal into the afterlife for use on the other side of the rift without dying or already having a rift to the afterlife? Noting that the afterlife apparently drains chakra from seals?"
"Didn't I just say don't harsh my buzz?"
"Apologies, sir."
"Anyway, up until now we weren't certain that it would work. We were pretty sure we were, but now we are. Minato's seals are the key, you see."
Gaku frowned for a moment, then nodded in recollection. "That chain of seals you found that teaches how to draw Lord Naruto's jinchūriki seal."
"Exactly! Kagome-sensei has already done the first two in the chain. They make invisible chakra constructs that puff away after a few seconds without doing anything."
"Without doing anything, sir?" There was an entire paragraph of implication coded into that seemingly neutral question.
"No, turning those trees purple wasn't the intent of the seal. It was an issue with one of the prototypes."
"Of course, sir. I mention it only because the trees have been spontaneously lighting themselves on fire and then equally spontaneously extinguishing themselves every few days since Lord Kagome did that work."
"Yes, well, it'll make a good tourist attraction. Anyway, we're now confident that we can make this thing. Sensei wants to grind through three or four more of Minato's seals in order to get more experience with this stuff and then we can start on the actual rift inflation seal itself. I'm starting on the seal chain myself and it is making sense! It is the coolest stuff ever, and I get it!"
"I am pleased to hear it, sir."
"Seriously, the Fourth was a flipping genius! He balanced a third chord intersection on a binodal interferon! And this is the first seal in the chain. Gah, I can't believe I never thought of it myself. I mean, no one ever would just working with them, it's insane. But the Fourth literally invented new mathemagical notation and manipulation rules and you can prove the construction within his system. Plus, we're going to be able to use this system to explore other potential seal elements. It's incredible."
"This is responsible for your good mood, sir?"
"No, that's just part of it! I got that math stuff figured out last night and then this morning I went to Bear Territory and visited Mareo. He's the Bear Summoner—I've mentioned him, right? Crazy old coot, never remembers my name?"
"I believe you have mentioned him once or twice, yes sir. Did you remember to take him that copy of Icha Icha Purity: Stolen Heart?"
"I did, and he loved it! Loved it enough to share some of his nodopanchi with me! Amazing stuff. It's made from berries and spring water and some herbs. Very sweet, a little bubbly."
"Are the berries perhaps a bit of a stimulant, sir?"
"Oh, pish tosh, Gaku! Stop being such a stick in the mud!"
"Of course, sir."
"And take that moth off your shoulder, it's distracting."
Gaku looked at his shoulder in confusion, then checked the other one. "Moth, sir?"
"Yeah! The moth! Ooh, or is it a bunny?" Hazō's speech was slowing down, becoming more thoughtful. "Is it soft? It looks soft. Bring the bunny over here, I wanna pet the bunny."
"Sir, there is neither a moth nor a bunny nor anything else on my shoulders."
Hazō snorted indignantly. "Hah! S'right there." He pointed accusingly, but his arm dropped back to his lap after a moment. "Plain s'day. Ver' cute. Looks sofff..." His eyes drifted closed, his chin drooped to his chest, and within moment he was snoring softly.
Gaku watched in bemusement, then stood up. He retrieved a blanket from the arm of the sofa, draped it loosely over his lord, and crept quietly from the room.
o-o-o-o
Mari raised an eyebrow as she entered the family room and saw Noburi and Yuno jump apart from each other on the couch where they'd been cuddling. Hazō and Akane separated a little more slowly on the opposite loveseat.
"Am I interrupting something?" Mari said with a sly smile. "Now, far be it from me to judge, given some of the things I've done in my youth, but I'd have thought you'd be more scared of orgies after the Anko incident. Still, if you're going to go through with it, you might want guidance from an expert. First-"
"Aaand that's enough, Mari, thanks for coming," Hazō said, standing up and brushing invisible dirt off the front of his shirt. He stood at the front of the room and gestured to his assembled clan-mates. "Now, you're probably wondering why I've gathered you all here."
"Is it not because of these scrolls?" Yuno said, gesturing to the four scrolls placed prominently on the low coffee table, each with the Tower's seal neatly arranged to face outward. "There are four of them and four of us."
Hazō sighed. "Yes, that's right. I was just trying to be dramatic." He handed out the scrolls. "Here, take a look."
One by one, the four ninja opened their scrolls and read them with dawning expressions of shock and surprise. Yuno was the first to speak.
"They want me to take a team of genin students?"
Hazō nodded. "Asuma says that with the senior ninja forces as depleted as they are, and a reduced need for missions in peacetime, almost all jōnin are being assigned genin teams. If you have a really strong reason, he'll let you out of it, but it sounds like it'll basically have to be something like signing up for ANBU. As for you two," he said, facing Akane and Noburi, "Chūnin don't necessarily have to do it, but are strongly encouraged to. There's still not enough mentorship capacity to go around, and the clans would be pissed off if their new genin got shoved into the general genin corps."
"I am unsure if they would want someone like me, who has never trained in Leaf's combat arts, teaching their children," Yuno said.
"They definitely want you," Hazō said. "All of you got special requests, and I suspect that Asuma will tailor teams to you all. It's ultimately up to you, of course, but I think it's a good decision. It gets us more integrated into Leaf's cultural fabric, which is always important." He read the uncertainty on all four of his clanmates' faces, and waved a hand. "Take the scroll and think about it. Tell me what you decide within the week though, so I can get the Tower to assign you strong teams if you accept."
Author's Note: This update covered eight days.
@Velorien will be writing chapter 559, which will drop before Tuesday and will cover the conversation with Ruri the Condor Summoner. This is a bonus update and will not alter the standard voting or publication schedules.
Things that were in the plan and happened offscreen:
Buy adoption tickets to adopt the ninja living on the Gōketsu estate: No other clan is selling tickets right now, so you went to the KEI to create one for you. They said they are having some trouble with their production process for the physical tickets and they will get back to you as soon as it's sorted out.
Buy an adoption ticket in order to adopt Honoka and her family: They were surprised that you wanted to adopt a clanless Academy student and said they would need to discuss how that should work and they would get back to you.
Adopt Honoka's family: You cannot legally adopt her parents without adopting her.
Hazō has made substantial progress on the first seal in the Minato chain! He thinks he's well over halfway done, and thinks he could finish in two more cycles, maybe even one if he's lucky.
XP AWARD: 40
Brevity XP: 8
"GM had fun" XP: 3
+1 for the Gaku scene
+1 for the second scene, because it's fun and it's going to lead to funny things, and it was written by the talented @Paperclipped so I didn't have to put any effort in but I still get to enjoy the ensuing hijinks
The sign of the Cadaverous Priest, the tavern Ruri was leading Hazō to, was a work of art. The pale, faintly green skin against prominent bones evoked both a skeleton and a zombie, the hollow rictus with its missing teeth perfectly mirrored the familiar jolly innkeeper grin from other such signs, and only the fanatical glare in the sunken, bloodshot eyes indicated that the subject was still alive. To round off the image, the not-quite-skull wore a clerical skullcap whose metallic decorations nicely balanced the silver and gold in the creature's beard.
"Welcome to the Cadaverous Priest, simultaneously Leaf's best and worst tavern," Ruri told Hazō as they went in.
"Best and worst?" he asked as he followed her to a corner table. Inside, the place seemed fairly average, with inexpensive but well-built furniture, sealcraft torches, and—wait, sealcraft torches? There was a good reason Jiraiya's Awesome Daybright Lanterns didn't get used in establishments like this one, despite their relatively low cost and impressive tuneable properties that blew conventional illumination out of the water, namely that to somebody without chakra reserves, they were just slips of paper with pretty patterns.
"Indeed," Ruri said. "KEI ninja, Kei ninja, and civilians get their food cooked by Ita Mae, winner of the KEI 1070 Battle of the Chefs. Clan ninja get theirs cooked by Hisatsu Sara, a creative genius we poached from a little place called the Yabai Café. Business is booming, yet somehow clan customers are few and far between these days. Today, you're my guest, Lord Hazō, but you might want to think twice before bringing your harem of lovers on a date here."
"I only have two lovers," Hazō objected. "You're thinking of Kei."
"On the contrary," Ruri said with the faintest smirk. "Lady Kei only has Tenten and Fujisawa. You, as of yesterday's rumour mill, variously have Akane, Lady Yamanaka, Amori Yukiko, the Leaf Oyabun's daughter Miyagi Yuna, Akimichi Choko, Anko (though I will give you a pass on that one once since I asked her myself), and clan heir Hagoromo Yūna, as well as a secret engagement with the freshly-graduated Uchiha Minori to add to your open engagement with Ami."
Hazō sighed. "I am not dating Amori Yukiko, I didn't know or care that the Oyabun had a daughter, I am still not dating Akimichi Choko, a world of no to Anko, dating Lord Hagoromo's daughter might have great subversion potential but I'm still not doing it, I am not going to marry a twelve-year-old, and I am not engaged to Ami."
"Interesting," Ruri said. "Would you like me to find you more lovers? You're a divisive figure within the KEI, but I'm confident I can find a few young women who'd leap at the opportunity. If you'll forgive me, stopping at two seems… unambitious for someone like you, Lord Hazō."
Hazō couldn't claim the idea wasn't even slightly intriguing, but given that he didn't even have time to properly date the two women he was already with…
"I'll take it under advisement," he said. "Now, about this Battle of the Chefs winner…"
-o-
Hazō had never heard of a KEI civilian before, but matters made more sense once he learned that Ita had a genin cousin, who received free room and board in exchange for managing the exotic lights and throwing out troublemakers (mostly clan ninja dissatisfied with their meal, who were usually in no shape to put up a fight). The hearty leek and potato soup wasn't quite the best Hazō had ever had, as Gōketsu wealth opened doors to restaurants that catered to the elite, but it was just the thing for a weary ninja back from a harsh mission and keen to recover their strength while forgetting Leaf field rations ever existed. (In Hazō's opinion, Leaf field rations were practically haute cuisine, and every time someone had the gall to complain about them, he wished he had some bread from a Mist ration to bludgeon them to death with.)
Meanwhile, on the other side of the Cadaverous Priest, a reckless young man with something to prove was tackling the Hisatsu Challenge, surrounded by cheering mates. If he was able to finish the enormous steak and its oozing purple fluid before the hourglass ran out, his medical bills would be on the house.
"To business," Hazō said as his spoon dropped into an empty bowl with a satisfying thunk. "You remember how I came to you for advice on talking to the condors the other day?"
"Sure," Ruri said. "From the fact that you're talking to me across a table and not as a ghost haunting my bedside, may I assume my advice was on point?"
"It was," Hazō said. "I can't claim they were overjoyed to face the man who facilitated the murder of their families, but they're prepared to cooperate for the sake of the entire world not following, and worry about the consequences for me after that's done and I've had my chance at earning their forgiveness with action."
Ruri nodded. "It sounds like you got some good ones. Condors are generally considerate, open-minded beings we could stand to learn much from, but when they lose themselves to anger, they can really lose themselves, and when they snap, they snap hard."
"Also," Hazō said, "we had Kumokōgō there as a moderator the way you and Mari suggested, and she raised some interesting points. She thinks Conjura's powers would fit perfectly with Arachnid support for fighting Dragons, and if Conjura's aid is a decisive factor in victory over the Dragons, in front of an entire Conclave of battlefield allies, she'll be able to demand freedom for her people in return, and Pantsā will have a hard time refusing."
"I heard about Conjura's powers from the coordinators," Ruri said, "and more from the Wings of Liberty. My impression is that she was holding back during her battle in order to protect her summoner. You and I both know that space-time manipulation is extremely hazardous to anyone other than the user."
Hazō nodded. "One of the reasons you can't bring passengers to the Seventh Path. So are you saying Conjura is even deadlier over there?"
"I only have stories," Ruri said, "and obviously Conjura's closest allies would exaggerate her abilities to nonsensical levels—severing chunks of the Seventh Path firmament to cast at her foes and such. But when you consider that Lord Naruto, arguably humanity's most powerful offensive force now that your father is one with the Will of Fire, was only able to defeat her through impossible luck and summon fragility while she was handicapped…"
Oh, yeah. Leaf's bizarre faith held that true Leaf ninja transcended the cycle of reincarnation and became one with the Will of Fire. Shikamaru had reminded him of it as one of his many objections to trying to raise the dead. That was going to be awkward once Jiraiya was back (and also probably pretty grim from the perspective of the man himself).
"Could you tell me exactly what the Arachnid Empress said?" Ruri asked.
Hazō gave Ruri the gist of it, the exact wording unfortunately escaping him as the Arachnids' peculiar speech patterns and incomprehensible cultural references had a tendency to tie his puny human brain in knots.
"Fascinating," Ruri said. "You know, Lord Hazō, when you have time, I would love to hear more about Arachnids and their culture. You make an interesting narrator, and I'm sure you have a wealth of stories to tell."
"Sure," Hazō said. "And, now I think of it, it seems like I could do to understand the Condors better as well."
Ruri's subtle smile faded a little further into ambiguity. "I'm not sure I've been able to glean as much from the ashes of Condor culture as you have from your time at the Hanging City, Lord Hazō, but what I have is yours. Actually, this relates to something I meant to tell you."
"Oh?"
"You're aware that the war provided an opportunity for Lady Kei to delay her Pangolin mission, and subsequent recovery served as a further excuse while you were away?"
Hazō nodded. "Kei thinks her grace period is almost up. She's… not at her best right now."
"I noticed," Ruri said softly. "But we haven't been wasting that time. Ami has been helping me with my plotting, and together we've been able to secure a visit for me to the Condor lands, ostensibly to seek new contracts. To the Pangolins, it's a priceless opportunity to emphasise my impotence before their slaves—a given condor's supervisors have veto power over their right to contract, and of course every last one of them will exercise it, with Pantsā and Central Command free of blame since they will merely be trusting the judgement of officers in the field. To me, however, it is an opportunity to be in the right place at the right time."
"The right place at the right time for what?" Hazō asked.
"Anything," Ruri said simply. "I'm not a generalist because I couldn't commit, Lord Hazō. I'm a generalist because I accept never being the strongest at anything in exchange for always having a path to victory. I've watched too many friends die when they ran into a wall that their particular specialisation couldn't overcome. For Lady Kei, I will be a diplomat, an assassin, an instigator, or a warm shoulder to lean on, and perhaps that will go some way towards repaying the countless debts that I owe her and the other coordinators."
Hazō had trained enough with Mari to pick up on Ruri watching his expression carefully as she spoke, but Hazō had no idea what she was looking for, or whether she was finding it. Yes, he could easily see this complex, unreadable woman plotting with Ami.
"I had a great deal of trouble, for some time, trying to understand what my role as summoner was," Ruri said. "I inherited a broken clan that had neither opportunity nor desire to offer me contracts, with a queen who hated me for being an ally of her summoner's slayer and her people's nemesis, and who was ever on the verge of killing me and then my successors so that Leaf could not benefit from stealing the Condor Scroll. I didn't know where to begin understanding this alien species, and they were not interested in being understood by the likes of me. I was at a loss at how to live up to the faith Lord Seventh and the coordinators, to say nothing of the rest of the KEI, had placed in me.
"I pursued the paths open to me. I spoke to other summoners to understand what summoning meant to them. They were as new as I am, or lived in ways I couldn't emulate, like Lady Tsunade, but every little helped, and summoner solidarity became an investment in personal connections otherwise unavailable to a KEI ninja. I questioned Lady Kei about the Pangolins, in retrospect without due consideration for her feelings. I searched the libraries for notes from summoners past."
Hazō wondered why she'd never come to him. Sure, he was exactly as new a summoner as her, both of them receiving their scrolls as a result of the Competition, but surely he could have been of some use?
"There was no precedent," Ruri said. "Even Maito Gai, whose Turtles had no interest in anything he or Leaf could offer them, was able to win their three-chambered hearts with his extraordinary charisma. Mine, I daresay, is functional rather than heroic.
"My role as I see it now, having won the Condors' tolerance if not their trust, is not that of a summoner. Not truly. They are unsatisfactory as tools, and they are of little worth as allies. I cannot use them as my path to martial power, or even to enrich the KEI through the Summon Trade Network. I cannot yet be a summoner as you are.
"But then, the Condors do not need a summoner either. What they need is a way to break the stalemate which is slowly draining their people's souls, and the main reason Conjura lets me live is that she knows she can't do it alone. They do not need someone to fight for but someone who will fight for them. They need a path to victory."
The smile came back, just a little.
"And once that victory is won and the Condors soar again, I think I will have all the power I want and more."
"I think I can help with that," Hazō said. "I certainly want to. I might not have nightmares about it the way Kei does"—Ruri's eyes widened a tiny bit, and Hazō realized that maybe Kei wouldn't have appreciated him passing on something so personal—"but what the Pangolins have done disgusts me, and I'm ashamed of the fact that I didn't see a single hint of it coming until it was too late."
"You are part of that path to victory," Ruri agreed. "So is Lady Kei, and so is Ami. So are others whose names I am still learning. I'm just one woman. It will be some time before I have the hubris to call myself a messiah—at least not until I have the personal power to punch Pantsā of the Adamant Scales in the snout. Until that blissful day, I will continue learning from the Condors, and converting the other summoners, and plotting with the sisters, and putting the pieces in place on the Seventh Path, and trying to be in the right place at the right time.
"What you've brought me is a valuable piece of the puzzle, Lord Hazō, and I wanted to give you some idea of what it means to me. I think the Arachnid Empress will be part of the path to victory as well. Perhaps the Dogs will be too, once the shape of the future is a little clearer."
Hazō smiled. "I'm glad I can help."
"There's one more thing," Ruri said. "I have a message from Conjura—for you, and for the others with a stake in Condor liberation."
"What is it?"
"She says we should try to find out what happened to the previous Polemarch," Ruri said. "Conjura is in no position to make enquiries of the Pangolins, and she suspects it won't be safe for Lady Kei to ask. I doubt your western clans will know, but you have many connections, and who knows what kind of clue will turn out to be a weapon in the end?"
Unless Ruri was even more of a generalist than Hazō realised, she probably wasn't aware of what a sealmastery thing she'd just said. Most of Hazō's extraordinary discoveries and brilliant inventions had involved, somewhere along the line, a seemingly unrelated line in somebody's notes, or an offhand comment by a family member, or a choice sentence in the middle of a Kagome-sensei rant, or realising that an embarrassing failure of a seal had failed in a very specific way. Soon, Death's dominion would end because Hazō had noticed a curious pattern in a few lines of poetry.
"When I discover the key to the Pangolins' downfall, you'll be the first to know," Hazō promised. "Except maybe for Kei, and any members of my family who are around when I get back," he added because sometimes he could be unhealthily honest.
Ruri chuckled.
"Allow me to get the bill," Hazō added, because he was a gentleman, especially where attractive women were concerned.
"Today is on me," Ruri told him. "Bribing you with food is an essential part of my plan, and it would hurt my pride to be foiled so easily."
Hazō was also too much of a gentleman to refuse to be bribed.
-o-
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