"You seem quite riveted, sir," Isobe suggested quietly. "Lord Gōketsu bring you another of his ideas?"
"Hm? Oh, yes." Asuma nodded. "In spades." He pulled one sheet out of the stack that Hazō had left him, this one covered in diagrams, and held it so his secretary could read it. "It flies. You lie in here and the spirits bear you aloft. It's even possible to gain altitude if they cooperate, and you can get them to cooperate simply by giving them fire to keep them warm. The design team filled a meadow with bonfires and it was enough to keep one of these things circling for over an hour."
Isobe took the paper and studied it. "Interesting. Could you use fire jutsu to propitiate them? That could be used on the move."
"They haven't tried yet but it seems likely to me."
o-o-o-o
The guards had taken Lord Gōketsu's instructions to heart; despite the cold, they were on the perimeter and eyes-out instead of standing around the fire. Thus, they spotted the intruder immediately.
"Hey! You can't be here!"
The stranger walked towards them, waving one hand in friendly fashion. He was dressed like a hunter or trapper; layers of furs, stitched together somewhat haphazardly, rendered his body basically shapeless, gloves instead of mittens would make him more dextrous on the trap lines, and a long wool scarf encircled his neck and wrapped over his head in lieu of a hat. The scarf was dyed purple and green, suggesting that he'd been wealthier at one point, but the moth-eaten holes in his gloves said that his fortunes had changed.
"Surely you could share a bit of warmth?" he called, his voice that of an older man despite the spryness of his steps. "I've been in the woods since dawn and I can't feel my toes."
"I'm sorry, but no," Gōketsu Dairoku said firmly. A glance behind him showed that the engineers had flipped the covers over the two skyslider prototypes, but the old man must have seen them. Dairoku couldn't help but sweat at what Lord Gōketsu might say about that. There was a reason that the team worked five miles into the woods from Leaf, far from roads. It had been repeatedly impressed on them how important it was to maintain secrecy on this project. What angry spirit had led this man here, and what was Dairoku supposed to do about it?
There was no choice.
He stepped forward, hands clenched tight on the haft of his boar spear. Eight feet long, solid oak with a steelback quill as a point and another as a crossguard two feet back from the head, with a steel knob on the pommel to balance it. The spear was a simple weapon but it was enough to kill virtually anything that might still be in the area after the Gōketsu ninja did their sweep each morning. Anything he couldn't kill with the spear, he could hold in place long enough for the other guards to kill it with their own spears. What it would do to this trapper didn't bear thinking about, but at least it would be quick.
The stranger read his intent and stepped back, raising both hands in alarm. "Hey now. It's fine, I'll leave."
"I'm sorry," Dairoku said, bringing the spear into alignment with the trapper's heart. In his peripheral vision he could see Ikuo and Hakaru closing in, ready to offer support if needed. The rest of the guards had shifted to cover the empty space and were keeping one eye on the killing that was about to happen and one eye on the surrounding woods. There had been two murdersquirrel attacks today and they couldn't afford to not be vigilant. The engineers had undoubtedly stopped work to stare gormlessly, but that was fine.
"You sure we can't talk about this?" the trapper asked, fear in his voice. "I'm no easy kill, you know! Come at me with that thing and I'll gut you!" He pulled a knife from his belt and brandished it. It was an excellent tool and a serviceable weapon, twelve inches long and two inches wide at the base with a fine taper and what seemed like a good edge. Dairoku would bury it with the man so that it could protect him in the afterlife as it undoubtedly had in life.
"I'm sorry," Dairoku said again. "This area is secret. Your bad luck, old man." He lunged forward, thrusting with the spear. One clean thrust, ending it quickly so as not to cause more pain than needed.
The old man threw himself backwards and stumbled on the uneven ground, going down on his butt as the thrust went over him. Dairoku slammed the butt of the spear down, using the pommel knob like a mace, but the old man managed to roll desperately aside. He regained his feet and demonstrated the difference between a man who carried a knife and a man who knew how to use a knife: He went back instead of forwards, trying to open the distance against an opponent with a longer weapon instead of closing in where the spearpoint couldn't be brought to bear.
"I won't say anything, I promise! I swear by my father's grave, not a word!" He barely twisted aside as Dairoku thrust at him again, the point of the spear going under his arm as he sucked in his belly to avoid it. Then Ikuo and Hakaru were there, thrusting in turn.
The old man dropped to all fours, allowing the spears to cross above him. Ikuo and Dairoku had to abort their thrusts and lean back or end up stabbing each other. Meanwhile the trapper scrambled out of the circle of attackers and back to his feet, bumping into Hakaru in the process and sending him staggering.
"Look, really, I promise, not a word!" The trapper skipped back, head pivoting frantically as he tried to keep all three of the guards in sight. Unfortunately, he had gone the wrong way when he got past them and now he was backing into the clearing instead of out of it. The engineers, gathered around the big drafting table next to 89b, were watching with interest.
Ikuo lunged forward and the old man dodged clumsily aside, once more tripping on a snow-covered unevenness in the ground. He went down to hands and knees, but pushed himself up again and scrambled towards the engineers, shouting "Save me! Please help!"
The engineers laughed as the three guards went after him. The ground was rough and the old man was surprisingly quick on his feet. He reached the drafting table just as the guards reached him.
The table was fully six feet square, built onsite from components brought here in storage scrolls. It was covered in half-eaten food, drinks, and piles of papers weighed down with inkwells, canteens, scraps of unused lumber, and other random objects.
One of the engineers stuck out a leg and the old man went down, arms and chest spraddling across the table. He pulled himself up onto it and rolled across, sending one of the trays of sushi flying off into the snow but fortunately missing everything else. He swept up many of the papers as he went, clutching them to his chest with one hand and pawing at them with the other in order to get them into a more manageable stack.
"Put those back!" Michiki shouted. The chief engineer's voice started off angry and became panicked as the stranger ran for the closest bonfire. "Stop him! Don't let him destroy the designs!"
"Stay back!" The stranger held a squall of half-crumpled papers out towards the flames. "Stay back or I'll burn them all! I mean it! You'll never see your"—he looked down at the pages—"pictures again!"
By now more guards were closing in from all directions. The old man dropped one of the papers and bent to pick it up just in time for a spear to go over his head. He saw the spear at the edge of his vision and jerked upright, his shoulder bumping the haft of the spear and sending it upwards. He turned to see who was attacking him and his elbow accidentally clocked the guard in the shoulder, causing him to stumble into the old trapper. The two men bounced apart, the guard going to his knees and the trapper going backwards just in time for another spear to pass inches from his face. Two other guards dropped their spears and tried to grapple, but the old man stepped forward and turned, avoiding the first guard and hipchecking the second to knock him off his feet.
Dairoku came for the old man with a series of short, tightly controlled spear jabs at the face and chest, pressing forward with each one. The old man was studying the papers in fascination, but somehow he managed to turn and twist at just the right moment to be where the spear wasn't. Dairoku tried a quick reverse, swinging the pommel knob up, but a fur-clad boot stopped its motion before it could gain any power. The old man turned and turned again, continuing to read the papers as he pivoted up the haft of the spear and bumped Dairoku with another hipcheck that sent him sprawling.
The trapper skipped aside from two more attacks, grabbed the haft of a spear with one hand and yanked forward on it. Its wielder, already moving in that direction, overbalanced and fell on his face. The trapper stepped lightly over him, took two steps across the snow without leaving any tracks, and hopped up to sit cross-legged on the drafting table before pulling his scarf down.
"Hello!" said Asuma, Seventh Hokage, jōnin of the Leaf, and distinctly not an old trapper. "Dairoku, Isuo, all the rest of you: My compliments on your reactions. You handled that exactly right. Michiki, this is lovely work on the drafting. Now, I would be delighted if you could give me a more detailed explanation of how the spirits work with these 'skysliders'. I thought perhaps we could try some fire jutsu, see if it makes them happy."
XP AWARD: 0 (It's an interlude.)
This was a flashback but we are still in linear time so the next chapter will continue from the end of chapter 490. Vote time! What to do now?
Voting ends on Wednesday, January 12, 2022, at 12pm London time.
It was time for Hazō to do something he'd once have considered unimaginable.
Hazō's door was securely locked, with a sign warning any would-be interrupters that sensitive experiments were in progress (he didn't dare tell anyone in his family what the experiments were today, but on the other hand those who knew him also knew it was generally better not to ask). His map of the Elemental Nations annotated with scroll location theories, his pride and joy, was spread across the floor in front of him, overlaid with a five-by-four grid. A stick of expensive meditation-enhancing incense, once a loathsome symbol of clan excess, smouldered gently in a container by the window, filling the room with the beginnings of a sweet, musky smell. Finally, the Jashin medallion he'd received from Hidan was clutched tightly in his left fist. Was it a little warmer than he'd expect of a metal object at room temperature? No, probably just his imagination.
Hazō sat down, legs crossed, and closed his eyes. It was time to answer, once and for all, a question that had haunted him ever since his duel with Hidan in the village of Bakuchioka. There was nothing strange about lucky or unlucky streaks in games of chance. They were called games of chance because they were fundamentally unpredictable in a way that go or shogi weren't. But Hazō had learned the basics of calculating odds from Kei as preparation for the Chūnin Exam. In a simple game like Chō-Han, where the odds were always fifty-fifty once you ruled out cheating, streaks like his simply didn't happen. It was the same kind of only-technically-possible as Yuno letting Noburi hold hands with another girl.
Hidan claimed the ridiculous luck was proof of Jashin's favour. Initially, Hazō had been sceptical. Setting aside the question of whether Jashin would be inclined to favour a non-believer over his own high priest, did this obscure deity worshipped only by a handful of crazed fanatics even exist in the first place? Thinking back to Team Bloodrage, it was almost more logical to conclude that Jashin didn't exist because these were the kinds of people who believed in him. Joining Team Bloodrage in their faith was like joining Hagoromo Ritsuo in homophobia—even if, hypothetically speaking, there was some convincing argument against gay love, it would automatically be turned into self-serving, hateful sophistry by the mere fact of coming out of Lord Hagoromo's mouth.
Yet the more he thought about it, the more he wondered. Something had allowed Hidan to go toe to toe with Orochimaru at Nagi Island, dealing and taking unquestionably fatal wounds until one of them lost at ninja rock-paper-scissors. It could have been ninjutsu. It could have been a seal. It could have been some other trick. But Hidan, the only person with the answer, believed that his fate was ultimately decided by a god of blood and murder who was both able and willing to intervene on his favoured shinobi's behalf. What if Jashin was real? If he was, what if he really did hold the secrets of immortality, as an alternative path to an objective Hazō had to pursue with every tool at his disposal? It wasn't something he could brush away just because his introduction to the religion had been a pack of battle-crazy morons.
What he was about to do was an act with implications. He knew that. Hazō's religious foundations were already shaky. The ancestors hated him twice over, maybe more. He was out of the area of influence of any Water Country kami who might have favoured him for their own inscrutable reasons, and he doubted he'd already earned positive interest from their Fire Country counterparts (and even if he had, he'd converted to a religion that forbade their worship). As for the Will of Fire, if it really dwelled in the heart of every Leaf shinobi, then it definitely knew that his interest in it was instrumental at best, and that he'd drop it like a hot potato if it ever got in the way of Uplift.
If Jashin was real, then praying to him for aid here and now, of his own free will, without a scythe-wielding lunatic standing over his shoulder to compel him, might count as an act of conversion. Hazō couldn't begin to guess at the implications if that was the case.
On the other hand, Jashin had already done more for him as a non-believer than any of those other entities ever had for him as one of their faithful. If real, the god of murder had lent him his power to save a dozen lives, maybe more, without even being asked. If Jashin's power could be used to save lives, and maybe even pursue immortality, and Hazō already had his favour and the favour of his high priest (unless the latter was dead, which was still a win because it meant the position was open)…
This test was going to be important in more ways than one. If Jashin answered his prayer and it resulted in mission success, that wouldn't just mean he was real. It would mean he was real and prepared to help the Gōketsu get a summoning scroll (or a summoning scroll's worth of gratitude from the Hokage), and that would be proof that Jashin's favour was an enormous competitive advantage for the clan and therefore for Uplift. Or, if he didn't answer, it wouldn't mean anything in particular, and Hazō would have lost nothing by trying.
Now, how did one draw Jashin's attention? Hazō doubted that he was in the "Lord Jashin is always watching over me" bracket with Hidan, and he wasn't prepared to carry out a Jashinite ceremony just to test a theory (not that he knew what those entailed, other than blood sacrifice being a sure bet). The best he could do was to meditate on things Jashin liked for ten minutes or so, and hope that was enough of a spiritual beacon.
Jashin was the god of blood, violence, and murder. If what he'd learned at O'Uzu was true, he was also the god of sex, fertility, and birth—if only as a prelude to the blood, violence, and murder. That was probably a better, or at least, less disturbing place to start.
But how could a healthy teenage boy with two attractive girlfriends possibly keep his mind on sex for ten whole minutes?
Hazō persevered for the greater good. After long milliseconds of effort, images of Akane began to float to the surface of his mind. Fascinating, vivid images. Some were memories. Others were dreams, desires, even plans, long held at bay by simple lack of time (or, in rare moments of time, by sheer tiredness) and therefore ever more keenly yearned for. If this much passion wasn't enough to draw Jashin's attention—
The thought was like being doused in icy water.
Hazō had already prepared himself mentally for this ritual. He'd accepted that he was praying to the god who had chosen history's most prolific serial killer as his high priest. He'd accepted that he was asking for help from the god whose favour was a reward for murdering Daizen, and whose further favour Hazō didn't know how to earn except through blood sacrifice. He'd accepted that, if the prayer was successful, he'd be placing himself in the dark god's debt, if ever so slightly, and encouraging his greater attention or even intervention in the future. Hazō was prepared to take that first step on the path, and face whatever consequences came, for the sake of his ambitions.
But if there was one thing he could not do, it was to involve Akane. Akane did not belong in the same thought as Jashin. Akane was precious. Akane was holy. Akane was pure. Hazō's feelings for her were pure. The idea of drawing Jashin's attention to her, or even just using her as a tool to draw Jashin's attention to himself, was disgusting. It was like using one of Jiraiya's haori to clean the latrine.
Huh. Akane was holy. It was a thought that might never have crossed his mind if he hadn't been thinking in a religious register to begin with. It sounded like something Kei would say about Ami, or maybe Ami about Kei, and therefore not exactly a healthy way to think about a relationship. But on the other hand, maybe their attitudes made a little more sense now. This was what it was like to have a person occupy a special, unique position in your heart, to the point where it felt like even thinking certain kinds of thought about them would sully them. No wonder Kei got murderous at the idea that a lowly mortal whose flaws she knew intimately and could list alphabetically on request might try to seduce her immaculate icon.
But this was no time to empathise with his sister's unhealthy worshipping tendencies. He had a dark god to invoke.
Lust was apparently not the way to go. That left… murder. Hazō's murders had not been many. Most of them were old, their emotional impact faded, and the ones that sprang to mind first, the sixty sailors of the Sunset Racer, were another thought he was unwilling to offer up to Jashin.
On the other hand, there were plenty of murders yet to come. In Hazō's darker moments, he'd contemplated plans and weapons capable of wiping out the entirety of Rock, held back only by the abstract concerns of not getting Leaf Whirlpooled or running out of Tama. When he recalled his friends' families being wiped out by the Collapse, it was not hard at all to immerse himself in fantasies of rampant murder, or to dream of the day when his special training finally bore fruit and he was able to end war by the simple expedient of killing anyone who refused to make peace. Besides, what did it matter how many died if his quest ultimately ended death?
Keeping the Blood God at the forefront of his mind, Hazō allowed himself to imagine the various things that he would do to Rock ninja if he could, or when he could, with his fists, or with his dogs, or with his seals, or with seals that—for now—only existed in his imagination. What would appeal to Jashin most? Spines snapping in Hazō's hands? Hearts ripped out and held aloft? His enemies melting into goo or being exploded into tiny shreds of flesh or turned to mincemeat by macerator shrapnel? He still hadn't seen what the banshee seal line, properly applied, could do to a human body, but he added his imaginings to the growing mountain of corpses. The air would burn in their lungs as Elemental Mastery—no, no Akane. But he could easily imagine Candoru or Cantelope tearing out throats, water dragons crushing bones with their enormous jaws, and pangolin claws slashing open the bowels of those too slow to flee.
Hazō's blood boiled. His muscles burned with the need for violence. After long minutes of glorious slaughter, he found himself having to force his mind back to his original goal. Yes, this was enough.
In his mind, he kneeled in supplication.
Lord Jashin, I beseech you. Tell me where to go in order to locate the Otter Summoning Scroll.
Then, he opened his eyes and picked up a handful of d20s. With an effort of will, he forced himself not to crush them. Then, glaring at the Wind Country as if willing it to give up its secrets, he threw the dice down onto the map all at once.
5.
17.
2.
11.
19.
3.
5.
5.
8.
2.
Hazō stared at the map in growing fury. There was no pattern. Nothing. Either Jashin wasn't real or he wasn't listening. This whole damn experiment had been a complete waste of his time.
Still, he might as well be thorough, since he wasn't going to bother with this shit a second time. Hazō rolled the dice again.
7.
4.
4.
19.
17.
11.
11.
18.
10.
5.
Still nothing. What an idiot he'd been, hoping that a lucky streak at dice meant there was a god out there who personally liked him.
7.
18.
5.
17.
18.
6.
11.
19.
8.
14.
Fine. Whatever. He should probably do some more meditation after he cleared up. It might not be good for his judgement if he had scenes of blood and violence hovering in his mind's eye the entire rest of the day.
But as Hazō got up to put out the incense, something curious caught his eye.
He gathered the dice. He used the Iron Nerve to replicate his original position and his throws. He frowned.
The numbers were still meaningless, but wasn't it odd how, all three times, several dice clustered together on Wind's northern border?
-o-
You have received 1 - 1 (Brevity) + 1 (Fun-to-write) = 1 XP.
The rest of the plan hasn't happened yet. Since the experiment took less than an hour, you're only getting XP for a small part of the day.
-o-
Hazō tried throwing the dice some more, but the results were inconclusive.
-o-
What do you do?
Voting closes on Saturday 15th of January, 1 p.m. New York time.
The plan calls for Hazō to observe the Dragons and to bring along any arachnids or dogs who want to go. It has this listed as the first scene, with the third scene being Hazō and Harumitsu doing research prep for several days before making a roll once Hazō's Consequences clear up. I'm going to give you a break and do them in the opposite order, since investigating monstrosities from beyond time and space while you're still suffering -16 on your Alertness is, frankly, dumb.
I have no idea how many arachnids would want to go on this mission, so let's call it 1d6-2:
Roll: 5-2 = 3 arachnids are going.
Canabisu is not going, since he's too old and the primary diplomat. He's not going to let Cantelabra go but he will allow one of Canaut or Cangue to go if they want to. Do they? They're both proud fighters who don't want to be seen to back down from a challenge, but their primary duty is to guard Canabisu. Let's give each of them a 35% chance of asking to go:
Cangue: 60
Canaut: 13
Okay, Canaut is going.
The party consists of Hazō, Canaut, and 3 arachnids.
They approach to within a couple miles of the butte, at which point they might be spotted by a Dragon.
Hazō and Team, lowest Stealth while walking across a flat, barren plain: ?
Dragon, Alertness + CM (the opponents are walking across a flat, barren plain): ?
They are spotted.
The Dragon is circling a few miles up, enjoying the breeze and idly wondering if it wants to eat something or go back to the butte and take a nap. It spots the crew and decides it wants a snack. It wings over, stoops, and burns the area to glass before snacking on the tasty charcoal briquettes that were once a loyal Dog, three inquisitive Arachnid warrior-scholars, and one foolish young ninja. Neither Canaut nor the arachnids have any sort of escape jutsu, so they're dead. Let's see if Hazō survives. His Out sensitivity means that he can detect the Dragons at a distance and the fact that this one has its attention fixed firmly upon him in the middle of actively trying to kill him increases that effect.
Does Hazō detect the Dragon before the fire kills him? It's stooping at enormous speed with the sun at its back, but he has relevant metaphysical senses, but they aren't that long-ranged, so I'm going to say he's going to need a Good roll, meaning a TN in the 30s. I'm feeling generous, so let's say it's a 30. This is an ambush situation, so he doesn't get to use Fate Points.
Hazō, Alertness (33) + 3 (dice): 36
TN: 30
Cool, Hazō detects the Dragon in time to react. He doesn't have any moves that are going to save the crew so nothing to do there. (There are too many of them to fit into a Tunnel Excavation hole and that wouldn't protect against dragon fire coming from above.) We're on the Dragon's turn so Hazō is limited to things that he can do very quickly—a single Supplemental at most. There are no good Substitution targets around and Hiding Like a Mole is a Standard action. With no better choice, he will attempt to unsummon himself. This requires that he not give in to the Out seizure caused by the presence of a Dragon, the difficult of which is increased by the fact that the Dragon in question is focused on killing him and his friends. I'm not sure how difficult this challenge should be and, honestly, any number could be justified since it depends very much on how far away he detects the Dragon, whether its attention is explicitly on him at the moment (as opposed to the general area or one of the others), and various other factors. Under this particular set of circumstances, let's arbitrarily say that it's a Greatly difficult roll and note that it might be different in future. Again, still feeling merciful so I'll choose the minimum TN of 40. I'm choosing this before looking at Hazō's character sheet to see what his Resolve is. (checks) Ooh, 29. Yikes. The quest is over if he blows this roll, so let's have him dump everything into it.
Hazō, Resolve (29) + invoke "Toughened Mind" + invoke "Promising Sealing Student" + tag "Getting Hit With This Aura Was The Whole Point of Coming Here Because I Wanted A Resolve Unlock" + 8 (dump remaining 8 FP for the flat bonus) + 0 (dice): 47
Cool. Hazō escapes back to the Human Path and the quest continues. He gets 1 FP for surviving, and a Resolve unlock. You may now level Resolve to a maximum of 35.
"Mari? Do you have a minute?"
The redhead looked up from her book to where her Clan Lord leaned in the doorway. Her eyes went wide and she tossed the book aside, hurrying to his side and pulling him inside. She bumped the door shut with her heel and settled him quickly on the bed beside her, his ice cold hand wrapped in both of her smaller and warmer ones.
"What happened?"
A laugh choked itself to death and his face twisted into self-mockery. "Things didn't go quite as planned. My wonderful plan had a slight flaw."
She pulled him into a hug and stroked his back without further question. He stiffened at the touch but then clutched onto her shirt and buried his head against her as sobs wracked through him.
It was minutes before they stopped. Mari waited patiently, holding him close and rocking slightly, her warm chin resting on his head and one hand stroking his back in slow circles. Eventually, once he was ready, she opened her arms so that he could sit up but she kept one of his icy hands firmly in her own while passing him a handkerchief with the other.
"Thanks," he said, wiping his eyes and blowing his nose. "Sorry. I think I ruined your shirt."
She smiled. "It's all right. I noticed the other day that I have somehow become a rich Clan Lady. Apparently I own an entire closet full of shirts."
His laugh was wet and jagged, but it was a laugh.
"Ready to tell me about it?" she asked quietly.
He nodded and wiped his eyes again. "It started off well. I read Kumokōgō in on this new idea I had for how to deal with the Dragons. She's excited about it and thinks it has an actual shot—certainly more than anything else they've come up with. She even thinks that we can make it work around the limitations of her oath regarding not letting anyone see the Great Seal. She's starting to coordinate her people and her allies, the Hornets, on the necessary parts of the plan."
Mari waited for him to continue. When he didn't, she prompted him. "And then?"
"And then I had to get clever. I wanted to see what the Dragons were up to." He looked at her with desperation in his eyes. "We needed to know. You can't fight a battle if you know nothing about your enemy!"
She nodded and stroked his cheek. "That's true. Scouting is necessary if you want to win a war, and that's what fighting the Dragons is: a war. You made the right choice, even if it didn't turn out well." She paused. "Can you tell me what happened?"
Hazō's jaw worked as his teeth tried to clamp shut over the words. The first had leapt forth before it could be stopped, bile vomited forth in self-hate, but the explanation needed to claw its way free. He took a breath and forced the words out. Part of the point of these conversations was to speak the pain aloud to another person, one that he knew was loyal and would keep his secrets. The great sage Carahanu was famous for saying 'Shared pain is lessened, shared joy increased'; Hazō could only pray that it was true, for the ache in his soul desperately needed lessening.
"I felt its aura just in time to unsummon myself." The last words squeaked, a strangled sound. "There was nothing else I could do. It came from above, from within the sun, and we didn't see it until it was on top of us. I had nothing to protect the others, there was nothing to Substitute with, no time for a counterattack. All I could do was unsummon." The sobs burst forth again.
"Oh, Hazō." She looped a hand around the back of his neck so she could gently pull him close, tucking his head once more under her chin and against her chest. She stroked his hair and let him sob until there was nothing more within him. Once the sobs were reduced to shuddering breaths she lifted him up and gripped both of his hands tight, leaning close to look him in the eyes.
"Hazō, you did the right thing. No matter what you feel, no matter the cost, the intelligence you gathered on this mission was critical. Now we know how fast they can attack and what to watch for. Did you get a look at the Dragon?"
He nodded, a marionette with a clumsy hand at the strings. "I glanced up when I felt it. I didn't get a great look, but it was two, maybe three hundred feet long, built like a snake with bat wings and a mouth like that megalodon that tried to eat us. Like a flat oval with gashes of fang." A spasm rocked him at the memory and his head jerked to the side before he managed to shake the image away and clamp his eyes shut.
He drew a long, shuddering breath and resumed in a tone of forced dispassion, distancing him from the memory and reporting it only as facts without their emotional taint. "Its jaw opened evenly in both directions—up and down. It was easily thirty feet wide. There were two tongues inside, long enough to protrude perhaps ten feet. There was a glow deeper in the throat, a reddish-white color. When I got to the Human Path I immediately tried to summon Canaut but the connection was snapped. He's...he's dead, Mari. I killed him."
One pale hand under his chin, she lifted his head and forced him to meet her eyes. "Did you order him to go?"
"...No?"
"Then it's not your fault. It's horrible, it's painful, and it's life. His death is on the enemy, not on you and not on him."
"But...but it was so quick. He was there and then he wasn't. It was seconds. Not even. I was only on the Human Path for a second, maybe two, before I tried to summon him. I was still catching my balance from the transfer, but I wasn't fast enough."
Her hand tightened on his, painfully tight so as to give him an anchor in his body. "His death is on the enemy, Hazō. Not on you. The best you can do now is avenge him."
He shuddered in a breath and then nodded. "I know."
Silence lingered for a moment and then Hazō forced himself to his feet. "I need to go back and tell Kumokōgō and Canabisu what happened. I'll see you soon."
Author's Note: I had absolutely zero juice yesterday, to the point where even making the darn bed was too much trouble, hence the late and short update. Things are a little better today and this was fun to write. Summary of the rest of it:
Finding a tracker: Sure, why not. There are plenty of adventurous Dogs and adventures on the Human Path are zero risk for them so it makes sense. Cannai was happy to help you find someone and you were able to convince them. Unlock for Rapport and Empathy. That means your current cap is 10 full levels above your current score, so you'll need to use those before I would give out another one. That isn't an official rule yet, although I'll talk to @Velorien and I suspect it might become one.
You made a new Great Seal replica. We'll deal with the details later.
You worked with Harumitsu on sealing and made progress on the Air Tunneling Seal. We'll figure out an appropriate TN and do the rolls later. If there was a sealing failure then we can assume it didn't break causality, by which I mean that Hazō and Mari all survived, along with at least one building for them to have this update's conversation in.
Events have continued during this plan and various Gōketsu have been assigned to various duties and/or missions. It's possible that some of them died in the interim. We'll figure it out and get back to you, but if you can manage it then it would be helpful if the next plan didn't involve interacting with any Gōketsu aside from Mari so that we don't have to worry about causality. No pressure.
As per the plan, this update covered 8 days: 6 days for the seal research, 1 day for talking to Cannai and finding a tracker, and 1 day for attempting to spy on the Dragons.
XP AWARD: 32
Brevity XP: 8
"GM had fun" XP: 10
It is now about 3pm on February 26, 1070 AS.
Vote time! What to do now?
Voting ends on Wednesday, January 19, 2022, at 12pm London time.
The Kei Clan compound was nothing like Hazō had ever seen before. Rather than the chunky main building and array of haphazard single-storey houses that defined the Gōketsu estate, the Kei had eschewed a central keep altogether in favour of a series of irregular towers, patterned after trees rooted in the earth, and connected at various heights by bridges that looked light enough that a strong wind would blow them away. It made Hazō think of Sanctuary, the Arachnid capital.
"Enjoying the architecture?"
Once, Hazō had assumed that Mari's tendency to sneak up on people when they were distracted was just part and parcel of her trickster tendencies. Lately, however, he'd started to wonder whether it was a general jōnin thing after all, and if so, whether it was a way to keep one's skills sharp, a way to position yourself advantageously in case of a confrontation (paranoia was definitely a general jōnin thing), a way to test and evaluate other ninja, a way to assert dominance, or something else still. When asked, Mari, of course, had answered with "yes".
"It's certainly unique," Hazō said. "If you were trying to make a point of rejecting tradition, I think you got what you wanted."
Kei Ruri gave a satisfied smile. "It's inspired by the Spirit Soaring, an old Condor temple high in the mountains that's currently serving as the Condor Queen's base of operations. They don't have much flat land to build on up there, so it's all vertical enough to make your head spin. The bridges weren't my idea—Suguru's cousin's wife's brother is an engineer who specialises in bridge construction, and Ebisu's uncle's friend's old drinking buddy's son was an architect involved in renovating Tanzaku Castle several years back, and we got them to put their heads together and figure out a way to substitute for the fact that we aren't condors."
"His uncle's friend's old drinking buddy's son?" Hazō repeated. "I tried drawing a chart of the Gōketsu and their main relationships once, and that was bad enough. I dread to think what yours must be like."
"We don't have decades' worth of investments and ancient clan coffers to draw on," Kei said, "but, being who we are, we have the closest ties to the civilian world of any clan, to say nothing of our old friends at the KEI. If we make an effort, we can get a family discount on just about anything—it's the only way we can afford a compound this big in the first place.
"But let's not stand out here in the cold. I believe there is a hot kettle with your name on it in Asuma Tower."
-o-
"You know," Kei said after a while of chit-chat during which Hazō both learned and shared a variety of disturbing things (he couldn't decide which was worse: that there was now a Kei Ibiki, that he was learning to make cookies from his civilian girlfriend and at some point in the future Hazō would be offered some and it would be rude to refuse, or that the term "OPSEC cookies" had made its way here via some unknown vector), "you haven't called me by name once this entire conversation. Is it that inconvenient?"
"Not at all," Hazō lied. Leaf culture was notable for how uncommon it was to stumble across multiple people with the same name, with one or two tradition-mandated exceptions—something which Ami had almost certainly had in mind when laying the foundations for the nightmare of the Kei/Kei/KEI. As a result, it was difficult to address Kei as Kei without simultaneously evoking his various mental associations with Kei, which was hardly fair to Kei given how different Kei and Kei were. Worse, it was a problem that applied to all the other Kei he had reason to talk to or about, with the sole exception of Lady Kei, and he could expect up to five more shinobi of note to turn Kei with every passing year.
"Then perhaps we should move to a first-name basis," Kei said smoothly. "We may not know each other all that well yet, but we can think of it as an investment in a closer future relationship… if you are willing."
Hazō wasn't completely sure whether he was being offered overtures of friendship or being subtly seduced, but by this point, he'd take anything short of physically cheating on his girlfriends just for the sake of his own sanity.
"It would be my pleasure, Ruri."
"Thank you, Hazō," Ruri said. There was no way growing closer to a silver-tongued jōnin who was close to Ami and might or might not be her part-time apprentice (the way she had been Mari's) could go wrong, right?
Maybe he should play it safe and retreat for today, once he'd accomplished his actual mission.
"It's not that I haven't been enjoying your company," Hazō said, "but there was actually something specific I wanted to talk to you about."
"Do tell."
"Kei has a mission coming up soon," Hazō began.
Ruri nodded. "And what would you like me to tell them?"
Definitely Ami's part-time apprentice.
Actually, this one wasn't so bad. Kei's missions wouldn't be relevant to Ruri unless they were joint missions (in which case she'd know before Hazō did) or they were Condor-related, and presumably Ruri had some reason to believe that she wouldn't be able to intervene to help her on the Seventh Path directly (which itself was a subtle message to Hazō).
"That it's a trap," Hazō said. "Or will be a trap, rather—I don't know how much they already know. They can't be obvious about it, though. Kei's sympathetic to the Condors, given her role in what's happened to them, and she wants to see them free, but if the Pangolins find out she's leaking information, that'll be the end of that. So it won't work for them to just pick a different target using the intel. Please make that clear."
"I see," Ruri said. "I'll pass your message on during the next check-in… but, Hazō, I can't make any promises. To the Condors, Lady Nara is the root of all evil—she's the one who caused their ruin, not out of hatred, but through sheer monstrous greed. She's someone they can blame for their troubles that isn't the unreachable, invincible Pantsā or the faceless occupation regime. I've even had offers.
"Don't misunderstand," she added. "Both as KEI and then as Kei, I owe Lady Nara enormously. Besides, to anyone who spends time around her, it's easy to deduce her actual role in the process.
"Still, reality doesn't care about intentions. Have you ever heard condor music?"
Hazō shook his head.
"It's alien, awful, and entrancing. It would probably pop a shadow clone. Instead of birdsong, they have ugly, visceral noises. Without hands or lips, their musical instruments look like a biosealer's failed attempts to recreate the Wood Element, and the sounds they make are blessedly beyond description. And yet, where the Pangolins have the Pantokrator, "the All-Powerful", the Condors have the Conductor, who wove the Six Pure Tones together into a Seventh, and then gave the Condors the freedom of the skies so they could dance to the music of the Paths.
"Ninja don't really have to take responsibility for what we do. Our enemies and our targets are too dead to reproach us, and the faces in the nightmares all blur together after a while, and they were only enemies and civilians anyway. There are ripple effects that destroy families, businesses, even the occasional government, but no one demands that we worry about hypothetical people far away whose lives don't affect Leaf's safety or interests. This is natural, or at least, it's the only way we as a culture can exist.
"But that healthy way of living can run up against something that's just the wrong order of magnitude. For the weak-willed, that could be perpetrating a massacre, or assassinating someone they'd grown too close to. I once heard a story about a genin who killed himself after murdering a family with young children, though it's probably apocryphal. Whatever it is, there will be some action with consequences that stop you dead in your tracks.
"I think you should find time to visit the Condor lands, Hazō, even if you don't listen to their music. Not because I want you to suffer, but because the powerful have a responsibility to be ready for the consequences of their actions, and with the scale of your ambition, if your next 'wrong order of magnitude' blindsides you, that could go very badly for a lot of us."
Hazō sat in silence for a while, taking in this advice. He had to admit that he'd never found himself drowning in guilt over the Condor genocide the way Kei did. Certainly, the Condors were suffering, and that was bad, and in some ways his fault, but ultimately, a lot of intelligent beings were suffering in a lot of places, and he was already dedicated to fixing this as effectively as he could. Would it be meaningful for him to go see the Condor lands for himself the way Ruri thought it would, when he already had the theoretical knowledge? Even if it would, was it realistic for him to find the time?
"Thank you, Ruri," he said finally. "I'll bear that in mind. Please let me know if the Condors say anything about the message."
"I can convey the information," Ruri said. "I just don't have the power to make sure it's taken on board."
-o-
You have received 1 + 1 (Brevity) = 2 XP.
-o-
This update took up the morning. The rest of the plan has yet to be implemented.
What do you do?
Voting closes on Saturday 22nd of January, 1 p.m. New York time.
Hazō stared at the stubborn, stupid, stolid, obstreperous block of stone that sat stupidly in front of him, metaphorically laughing in its stolid and stonelike metaphorical way.
It shouldn't be this hard.
Sealing was simple—at least, once you had rammed your brain into the Out a couple of times and come back with secrets torn from the deepest essence of the cosmos. You used ink and motion to focus your intent as you painted the Paint with requests, cajolements, and hints. The pressure of the brush, the twist of the wrist, the action of the fingers through time and space, the fluctuations in your own chakra system...it all added up to creating channels through which chakra could flow, much like pressing dirt to the sides with your fingers created channels through which water could flow. The similarities continued; if you left finger impressions in the channel then the water wouldn't flow smoothly. There would be turbulence, tiny eddies that wore at the sides of the channel, widening it and slowing down the flow. That was fine with water, a stable and predictable substance that flowed only across the surface of the Paint. Chakra was a different beast. It was subtle and changeable, mercurial, sometimes even playful. It could be destructive and angry, and also be sweet and forgiving. It was like a toddler without parents: unpredictable and barely controllable. Except that when chakra threw a tantrum the Paint cracked and the world bled.
Ink didn't float in a perfectly smooth plane lacking all thickness. It soaked into the paper, it mounded up above it by a tiny amount. It was by its very nature three-dimensional. Thin, to be sure, but still three-dimensional. Why then should it be difficult to make a seal that took advantage of that third dimension? The Great Seal did it. Sure, the Great Seal was probably created by a figure of legend, a demigod with knowledge that transcended anything known to mortal men. Sure, the Great Seal was made of some unknown material that had at best a presumed and distant shared ancestry with stone. Still, chakra followed laws.
Well...chakra followed laws when it felt like it. Or, at least, it abided by certain suggestions made by the human universe so long as those suggestions weren't too onerous.
So. Given all that, why the fuck could Hazō not figure out how to make a seal out of stone?!
Part of it was obvious. It was easy to shape a seal on paper, with ink, where the brush could turn and twist. It wasn't possible to make a smooth curve with a chisel; sculptors used a chisel as a first pass and followed it with files to smooth the edges. In sealsmithing there was only one pass. You could not fix a poorly-laid channel, you could only tear up the blank and try again.
He wasn't using a chisel, he was using the Earthshaping jutsu. He was causing the actual, foundational form of the stone to change. The stone was now the shape of the basic air-movement seal from Jiraiya's training sequence. It was a seal so simple that it was suitable to be the first seal ever inked by a new student.
Not only was the stone now the shape of that very trivial seal, he had molded the internal structure of the stone into curves and lines that mapped to the pattern of the chakra flows within the paper. He wasn't even trying to modify the design to have a vertical component. The patterns he was creating were all in one plane and as thin as they could be in order to mimic the patterns of ink on paper.
Of course he knew why it wasn't working. The stone was too diffuse, too impure. It needed to be denser and made of only one material. He had tried multiple different kinds of stone but none had been suitable. He had tried to fix it himself with Earthshaping and failed every time. No matter how much he pushed at the jutsu, no matter how carefully he attempted to comb through the stone in order to filter the intrusions, it wasn't enough. His metaphysical fingers were too fat, his metaphysical eyes too blurry. They had improved as he practiced with the jutsu—when he first learned it he had barely been able to tell anything about the internals of the material whereas now it was as though he was looking through a thick gauze blindfold.
It wasn't enough. It damn well wasn't enough. The Iron Nerve had captured the details of the Great Seal, and after it stopped freaking out his bloodline had dumped a huge amount of information into his brain. The precise thickness at every point, the density, the internal purity, the locations of every part of every channel through which chakra flowed, the deosil and widdershins helical twists that channels took to make the flows spin towards the center of the seal, and on and on. He should be able to reproduce it—not all of it, not yet, that was ridiculous. Still, he should at least be able to create a channel for the chakra.
Sage damnit!
This was the chance. Three-dimensional sealing. This was how he could fix the Great Seal—or, at the very least, make a duplicate to keep the effect running and then slowly and safely shut down the damaged one. Maybe. Because sure, why not? That was totally a thing you could do, right? Safely shut down a seal the size of a mountain that used completely unfamiliar principles and contained more chakra than could be imagined?
And wasn't that just the issue?
The seals made by sane people, real people, used trivial amounts of chakra. It needed to be that small because otherwise the interference between the various channels would cause the whole thing to fly apart. It needed to be barely a whisper—indeed, that was the first problem faced by every aspiring sealsmith: not using too much chakra. Nothing else in ninja training used so little, not even the Basic Clone technique. Most people couldn't even use so little without intensive practice. It was so little that even moving while you were infusing a seal made it difficult.
The Great Seal wasn't like that. It had oceans of chakra flowing through it. Vast, rampaging torrents that moved with smoothness enough to made the finest glass seem jagged, except for the tiny places where the leakage caused turbulence that was slowly eating away at the rips in the Seal's channels, where it leaked out like blood from a wound that could not be staunched. Not a big wound, not a wound that would kill you in minutes. A wound that left you with plenty of time to seek out a medic...assuming there were any medics available who knew how to treat the wound.
Of course, the analogy only went so far. If no doctor was available for a bleeding wound then the patient would die but the rest of the world would spin on. If no doctor was available for the Great Seal then...well.
This right here? This recalcitrant, ugly, stupid lump of rock that should have had a seal embedded within its heart? This was Hazō's best guess at the first step in becoming the doctor that the Great Seal needed. His best guess, but he couldn't take the first sagebedamned step because he couldn't find stone good enough.
Hazō hurled the stone at the nearest blast shield, shattering it to pieces. Before the pieces hit the ground he had turned away and headed for the dining hall and then for his office. Maybe tea and food would help, maybe it wouldn't, but right now he would literally rather be digging latrines than dealing with this. Fortunately, as a Clan Head he could settle for signing off on the sales of the fertilizer instead of actually harvesting it himself.
Author's Notes:Voting is open, but Snowflake's birthday may become a mandatory scene for the next plan, at @Velorien's discretion. Things that happened offscreen:
Things that are protected by a Five Seal Barrier (5SB) can still burn and melt.
You checked in with Mari. I have no idea about what, but you did it.
You checked with Noburi about his efforts to find a Toad who is willing to spend months hiking across a mountain range and then cross several territories of unfamiliar and probably hostile clans in order to spend an unknown period of time sitting around doing nothing except being a living telephone / teleport beacon for Noburi. He's been laughed out of every conversation. You talked to Asuma about paying for it, you summoned some dogs to talk to the Toad reps. Asuma is willing to pay and the dogs were willing to play, but it wasn't enough to convince anyone.
XP AWARD: 4
Brevity XP: 1
"GM had fun" XP: 3
It is now 11am.
Vote time! What to do now?
Voting ends on Wednesday, January 26, 2022, at 12pm London time.
"Akane," Snowflake said slowly, gazing at the appalling spectacle before her, "clearly, observing Kei's relationships with Hazō, Noburi, and even Yuno has caused you to feel left out, so please allow me, in my capacity as her clone, to bestow your first threat of vicious murder for iniquities inflicted upon our person."
The outdoor dining table sat amidst the last snows of winter, with the warm indoor area temporarily closed for cleaning in the middle of lunchtime. The silence of a total lack of customers, also in the middle of lunchtime, was louder than a complaining Hyūga Neji. The menu lied. The waiter stared at her with the vivid horror of a man once threatened with the scaly annihilation of all he held dear. Yes, there was no mistaking where Akane had brought her.
Rather than quail in her boots as any mortal should when faced with a wrathful Snowflake (clearly, additional tips from Kei would be required), Akane nodded seriously.
"I see we're going to have to start from the basics. Snowflake, threatening people on your first date is not appropriate behaviour and may put them off. Actually, you probably shouldn't threaten people on any date unless you know they're into that kind of thing."
Snowflake duly wrote this down.
"Is that common?" she asked.
"A lot of things about Hazō make more sense if you assume that on some level he enjoys threats to his life," Akane said. "To say nothing of Noburi's entire romantic history. So now I think about it, maybe it's more common than I thought."
Snowflake duly wrote this down as well.
"And so," Snowflake concluded, "since it is impossible for you to credibly threaten my life, you have opted for the alternative of threatening my sanity with a meal at the Yabai Café, being fully aware that acute food poisoning is arguably the most traumatic physical experience of my life so far. I commend your lateral thinking. Now, to return to the topic of your rapidly plummeting physical safety..."
"What? Nonono," Akane shook her hands hurriedly in front of her as if Snowflake's wrath were a cloud of particularly weak-willed insects. "You're here so I can introduce you to an important Leaf kunoichi tradition. It's said that any relationship that can survive a first date at the Yabai Café will be able to survive anything. Except maybe a second date at the Yabai Café."
That gave Snowflake pause. Would a person going on a second date with Snowflake truly be in the same relationship as they were the first time? Snowflake chose to believe that she was the same person every day, as much so as anyone else, but it was impossible to objectively verify that this was true. Her studies had not provided conclusive evidence as to where people kept their memories—some pointed to the brain, others the soul, and a number of philosophers had made persuasive arguments for the heart, personal chakra, and the pancreas. A dispelled Snowflake had none of these; her memories were kept in Kei, and every new Snowflake was derived not from herself but from Kei, together with new Kei memories influencing her personality that the previous Snowflake had not possessed. Perhaps when Snowflake was dispelled tonight, she would die forever, and Kei's next creation would never know.
Was she permitted romance if she could not promise a lover that she would still exist tomorrow?
"Very well," Snowflake conceded. "I suppose I have nothing to lose by trying, except possibly the rest of my existence. Then again, that is a gamble faced by every patron of this establishment."
She raised her hand.
"Waiter!"
"Y-Yes, My Lady?"
"Two daily specials, if you would be so cruel," Snowflake said. She strongly suspected that, given Kei's past experiences here, studying the menu would bring only nausea.
"Snowflake!" Akane hissed. "Being polite to the staff is a cornerstone of good dating etiquette."
"Apologies," Snowflake said. The waiter inexplicably flinched. "Please inflict two daily specials upon us."
"Snowflake..."
"I was merely being objecti--oh, fine. I would be grateful if you bestowed upon us two daily specials."
The waiter muttered something unintelligible which Snowflake chose to take as affirmation, and fled before Akane could do something foolish, such as ask what the daily special was.
-o-
Snowflake soon regretted her anticipatory hypothetical condemnation of Akane. The plate before her contained nothing but a completely innocent-looking steak with a side of salad. Nothing wriggled, gibbered, glowed, or whispered haunting offers. The steak was the light brown of well-done steak, estimated (after poking it with a knife) at 250 grams in weight and 3 centimetres thick, with a surface area of 60 centimetres squared—all plausible values. It even smelled like other beef steaks Snowflake had eaten. The salad, too, matched the parameters for vegetables available in winter in the Fire Country, or imported at affordable rates based on the tables Kei had memorised.
Snowflake had not known such terror since learning how close Kei had come to Orochimaru's operating table.
Summoning up all of her courage from the depths of the soul she did not possess, Snowflake took a hesitant first bite.
It tasted like steak.
Snowflake took a disbelieving second bite. Reality failed to catch up to her.
Snowflake swallowed, and waited anxiously for some kind of palate-obliterating aftertaste.
Nothing.
Across the table, Akane had taken a full mouthful of salad, and was still alive, conscious, and even smiling.
"Waiter!" Snowflake snapped.
The pale man was at her side instantly.
"Y-Yes, My Lady?"
"This cannot possibly be a Yabai Café meal. Explain yourself."
The man went paler still, an exceptional feat without the application of makeup.
"Y-You are Lady Nara Kei and Lady Gōketsu Akane, are you not?"
There was that familiar little stab. But of course, Kei was famous, or infamous to some, and Akane's identity could be inferred from clothing and context. Snowflake was no one.
"Supposing, hypothetically, that we were…?"
"W-We could not possibly serve an ordinary meal to honoured p-personages such as yourselves," the waiter stammered, clearly aware that his fate hung in the balance, though not that, as Gōketsu, they were regrettably inclined to spare his ilk.
"I require an authentic experience for my research," Snowflake said coldly. "Remove this travesty from my sight and prepare my chosen order immediately."
"Snowflake," Akane muttered, "remember what I said about being polite."
"Not in this instance, Akane," Snowflake stated flatly. "This man has seen fit to impugn the honour of my implied potential lover, whose judgement, good taste, and ability to provide a satisfactory first date are being undermined in my eyes by the establishment's failure to meet expectations. Now, you, heed my command or suffer."
She thrust out her plate towards the waiter like a sword aimed at his heart.
The waiter stared at them goggle-eyed. "M-My humblest apologies, My Ladies. I did not realise you were on a d-date."
Oh. Oops.
Opposite her, Akane gazed longingly at her delicious steak for a couple of seconds, then resigned herself to the need for academic rigour and handed over her plate as well.
-o-
To be continued. Apologies for delay/low levels of content/etc.
Hazō was draped comfortably over a chair, reading by the living room's fire, when a faint foot-scuff announced Kagome-sensei's exploration of the door.
"Evening," Hazō said, looking up at his teacher with a smile. "Want to come in?"
"They're not back yet?" Kagome-sensei asked, craning his long neck through the door to check the room's corners.
"They've only been gone twelve hours, sensei," Hazō said, struggling not to laugh.
"Hrmph." Despite that, Kagome-sensei sulked through the door and into a chair.
Seeing his teacher's mood, Hazō wisely went back to his book. Best to let grumpy uncles start the conversation on their own time.
"What are you reading?"
"Hm? Oh, it's Volume II of Yumehara's History of the Elemental Nations. I read Volume I...ages ago. Not even sure how long. Tonight I figured I'd take a crack at the second volume."
Kagome-sensei's beaky nose was capable of masterwork derisive snorts.
"You don't approve?" Hazō asked.
"I suppose it's fine if you like twaddle, fairy tales, and propaganda. Of course, Yumehara was basically a plagiaristic cheater who took Nagasato's scrolls and turned them into lies."
One eyebrow rose and so did Hazō, closing his book. "Nagasato's scrolls?"
Kagome-sensei toed his fuzzy green slippers off so he could put his feet up on the raised hearth and broil his soles a bit. "Nagasato Goro. He was about a century before Yumehara."
"Go on..."
"It's been a while since I read it. I might not remember it all."
"That's fine, that's fine," Hazō said, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. "Tell me what you do remember."
Kagome-sensei leaned back, staring at the invisible words written on the ceiling that contained far-off memories. "Well, first, they've been called the Elemental Nations a lot longer than the villages have been here. Nagasato speculated that they had been created and named by the Sage, although he was only able to find definitive proof tracing back to the second century AS."
"Were they the same as the current ones?"
"Not even close. Used to be that Fire was a narrow triangle that started in what today is Claw and ran down to the coast of the Hanguri Gulf. The border of Wind reached to almost where Tanzaku Gai is today. Earth Country stretched down through what we call Fang and took a corridor of land all the way to the ocean. Basically, the length of the Tanburingu river. That whole area was rain forest at the time. Northern Wind wobbled between forest and grasslands as it went east to the Hanguri Gulf. Lightning owned what we call Rice, Iron, Waterfall, and Snow, as well as a stripe up the north side of Earth and that chain of islands down to Wave."
"Wouldn't that include where Hidden Rock is?"
"Where it is today, sure. The precursor to it used to be much farther west, at the fork in the Gushiken river. They only moved it east after the third water elemental rampage."
"Water elemental rampage?"
"Sure. The idiots wanted a defensible location, so they built on top of a plateau and used a war jutsu to pull water up through the stone to supply the place. From there it spilled out and became the Gushiken. Stupid move. Over time, the chakra construct that was drawing the water up to the surface leaked into the water itself and brought it to something like life. Over the next hundred or so years, whenever the concentration of chakra got too strong the river would spawn off an elemental which would rampage around destroying everything. Sometimes they would stick around and kill the locals, sometimes they would wander off and kill other people. Mostly people from Wind, since there was a lot more water in that direction than to the north and the water elementals were naturally drawn to the water."
He took his feet off the hearth, rubbing each sole across the opposite calf to get rid of some of the excess heat, then stuffed them back into his slippers. "Anyway, the people of Wind weren't too keen on that. Water elementals are too dangerous to fight close up, so they used their own war jutsu—"
"What's a war jutsu?"
"It's a large-scale, long-lasting jutsu. A ritual. Usually created by multiple jutsu casters sacrificing together to create and power the construct."
"Sacrificing what?"
"Each other, duh. The ritual leader begins the casting, his acolytes join in. Once they have expended their chakra, the ritual leader cuts their throat and uses their foutaining blood as a channel for their life force, feeding it into the construct in order to sustain the jutsu. Nobody uses them anymore since the Great Desertification."
"The what now?"
"Weren't you listening? I said that the western border of today's Wind and then-times Earth used to be a rain forest. Today it's a massive desert. What do you think happened?"
"...One of these war jutsu went out of control?"
"Yup. The jutsu 'masters' of Wind created a desiccation jutsu in order to oppose the water elementals. For whatever stupid reason they deployed it as a fence along their northern border. I think it was probably just supposed to destroy the bindings on any chakra construct passing through it—basically make the water elementals fall apart. Probably would have destroyed any seals moving through the area as well, which would make sense since the people of Earth used seals a lot more than the people of Wind." He sniffed derisively. "Stupid stinking idea. The war jutsu, not seals. Seals are smart.
"Anyway, they must have gunked up their casting, because the jutsu didn't have enough power. Naturally, any jutsu that size and complexity has a semblance of intelligence, same as one of your rock clones does. It reached out to its environment, pulling in chakra to support itself. Living things don't live without chakra, so over the span of a decade-ish this destroyed all life in the area. The jutsu kept reaching wider and wider, spreading north and south in order to find more chakra to power itself." He clapped his hands, the sound making Hazō jump. "Bam. Two hundred years later, Earth and Wind are deserts and the rain forest is gone."
Hazō digested that while Kagome-sensei riffled through his storage seals and produced a wool blanket, grapes, cheese, and bread. He fussed the blanket around himself and nibbled on the various comestibles.
"Granted, the whole situation wasn't helped by the fact that Earth and Wind were fighting through there the whole time. They kept chopping trees down with misaimed wind blades, creating big chunks of granite that redirected small streams, that sort of thing. Of course, those trees were holding the topsoil in place and breaking up the katabatic winds that come down off the mountains. And the streams were the headwaters of the Tanburingu, which reduced the overall volume and left less water to supply the trees, which meant more of them died off so more erosion and less of a windbreak. Add in some fire jutsu that get out of control and burn off big swaths of land, and soon enough you had open areas where the winds could howl through and reach onto the warmer lands below where they spawned off dust devils, some of which got strong enough to become full-on tornadoes and tear the place up."
"But aren't burned area very fertile? Shouldn't the trees have grown back?"
"Sure. Very fertile. Unless you've got generations of ninja fighting across the same patch of land and repeatedly burning everything down again, and a steadily-spreading jutsu that's eating all the chakra so that it's impossible for anything to live there."
"Wow."
"Mm-hm."
"Is the jutsu still there?"
"No way to know for sure without having an actual jutsu hacker go there, but I doubt it. I would imagine it starved to death after the place went desert. Or maybe it just settled down to a lower level and that's why there is still some life there, but not a lot." He shrugged. "Still, after you hit certain tipping points, you're not coming back. Once the desertification had spread enough, there was no stopping it or reversing it. The Tanburingu is still there and the edges of it are still fertile, but the ground along its borders was too badly damaged to sustain the growth that used to be there. The lack of a windbreak is part of why the interior is nothing but sand. Plus, I think some of the water elementals might have hidden within the Tanburingu and still be sucking chakra out of the area immediately around their nests. It would explain why things get worse as you go south."
"How's that now?"
"The northern border of Wind is dry enough to count as desert, but there are still plants. Go a few hundred miles south and it's just sand. Vast amounts, like granular waves tumbled by uncaring rivers of air. Massive sandstorms, tornadoes, that kind of thing. It's still technically part of Wind but I don't think anyone actually goes there." He sniffed. "Stupid if they do, but what can you say? People are stupid. Oh, except you, Hazō. And me, and Akane, and Noburi, and Mari, and—"
"Got it, sensei. So, you mentioned that the borders were different back then. How did things change to what they are today?"
"Oh, well, that's a long story. I suppose it all starts with..."
XP AWARD: 0 It's an interlude.
Voting remains closed. We expect to have the last of the various family missions rolled out soon (all hail @Paperclipped and his wonderful helpfulness), at which point we'll write those and then time will resume.
Mercifully, both Snowflake and Akane survived the Yabai Café daily special. Snowflake would have loved to put this down to her growing fortitude, but more realistically, it was the lack of side dish—or rather, their decision that the side dish was no longer fit for purpose after Snowflake nailed it with one of her concealed kunai during its escape attempt. Better yet, Akane had complimented her on her technique, noting that being able to show off one's proficiency with edged weapons in a natural way was a valuable ninja dating skill. Based on Kei's first date with Tenten, this seemed entirely accurate.
"What next?" Snowflake asked. "I assume the obvious next item on the agenda after lunch at the Yabai Café is a visit to the Yamanaka to have all memories of the event scrubbed from one's memory, even if precious childhood memories go with them?"
Akane shook her head. "Good guess, but your typical ninja doesn't have the kind of relationship with the Yamanaka where they can volunteer for experimental psychic ninjutsu. No, we're going to have to walk it off."
"As a world expert on memory storage and transferral, I can tell that you that memory does not work like that."
"Oh, I was being literal," Akane said. "Around this time of day during our dates, Hazō starts getting ideas, so I take him somewhere like Senju Memorial Park and we go for a walk. I get to admire the scenery while he's oblivious to anything going on around him, and it keeps him well away from both Gaku and sealing paper until either he loses interest or we can get him to Kei, Mari and/or Kagome for a sanity check."
Snowflake duly wrote this down.
"While I also pride myself on my ability to generate ideas," Snowflake said, "any activity involving being oblivious to my surroundings is not on the books for me, given what a single stubbed toe can do to a shadow clone. What does the slowly-shrinking pool of shinobi who are not dating Hazō do at this point in a date?"
"Typically," Akane said, "you'd want to share something you're interested in with the other person, or vice versa. If there's something you both enjoy, that's ideal for an early date. For example, we both enjoy board games."
"True," Snowflake acknowledged. "But, as with the Yamanaka, presumably a typical shinobi will not be able to head back to the Nara or Gōketsu compounds to access our board game collections. Are we, then, to purchase a board game for the specific purpose of this date?"
Akane's eyes glinted with pride. "The Village Hidden in the Leaves is well ahead of you."
-o-
Dr Liminal, maverick genius of the Hidden Pitfall sealcrafting community, crept through the temple of the ancient Fang civilisation, one hand ever over her pouch of pillaged seals while the other groped ahead, seeking out traps. On the other side of the chamber, that loathsome plagiarist Prof. Petunia was engaged in her own search. Any seal caches they found together would be split equally—that was the agreement—but as soon as Liminal's would-be rival finally lost her nerve and fled, the remaining treasures would be all hers.
It had better be soon, Liminal reflected. Despite her scholastic incompetence, her rival was currently in the lead by three seals, and that meant the bold explorer was going to have to push her luck just a little further than even she was comfortable with.
"One more chamber, my esteemed colleague?"
"Well," Petunia muttered, staring into the ominous darkness of the passageway ahead, "I suppose one more might be all right, my dear assistant."
Perhaps Liminal would push her into the next spike trap herself.
"I can't believe you didn't know about this place," Akane told Snowflake as an obliging waiter carefully placed two cups of green tea on the table between them (this time, indoors, because the Black Kitten Board Game Café wasn't insane). "Ami said it was a KEI and Nara Kei Fan Club joint venture."
"Kei makes an active effort to know as little about the Fan Club's activities as possible," Snowflake explained, "with the exception of release dates for the latest issue of Dauntless. I merely do not have the time, although I admit I have been more favourably inclined towards them since they agreed to stop using a snowflake as their symbol. I cannot wait for Kei to learn what they have chosen as a replacement." She nodded happily towards the black kitten on the sign outside.
"Still, a café where one may play board games surrounded by strangers? Why would anyone choose such a thing over the joy of amassing a collection to enjoy in the privacy of one's own home?"
"Oh," Akane said. "That would actually be our fault. The Gōketsu's, I mean."
"How so?"
"Well, you know how we host regular board game nights attended by various clan heads, summoners, and other famous figures of the shinobi world?"
"Of course," Snowflake said. "I receive an evening off every time."
"Turns out that when lots of famous people keep doing a thing," Akane said, "that thing becomes fashionable. A lot of board games are being marketed towards clan ninja and wealthy civilians, and that means higher-quality components and rising prices… and now a whole lot of people can't afford to buy board games the way they used to. To be honest, I feel awful about it, since it means clanless kids now can't get into gaming the way I did."
"Hence the café," Snowflake concluded, "which allows the deserving poor of Leaf to imitate the lives of their betters at an affordable price, temporarily salving the pain of having their hobby taken from them by those selfsame betters."
They pushed into another chamber. This one had one measly seal, which would remain unclaimed until more were found or one of them snatched it on her way out.
"I said I feel awful about it," Akane said. "But we can't reverse the social trend now. I don't think stopping the gaming nights now would change the way people think about them. Also, a dating tip: try to avoid saying things that make people feel worse, even if you think they deserve it. If you disapprove of them that badly, just don't invite them to another date."
Snowflake duly wrote this down.
It was a useful reminder, she reflected. It was easy to forget, in the safety and comfort of the clan compound, that she was far from the only person whose entire existence was shaped by the interests of those more powerful than her. The Gōketsu sought to uplift the civilian population relative to the ninja. The Nara sought to keep those in power from destroying civilisation in the process of protecting it. Leaf as a whole, on its better days, sought to promote peace and stability in the face of a dangerous world. But it was not Hazō or Shikamaru or the Hokage that experienced the direct consequences of those efforts. The people who did, by and large, had no voice in the decision-making process, or even any awareness of it. By their values, Snowflake was privileged beyond words to have a direct line to the person who shaped every detail of her life, and to have that person take her actual preferences and needs into consideration.
However, Akane was correct in that making her feel awful was not the objective of the exercise.
"Be that as it may," Snowflake smoothly changed the subject, "I am surprised that you would be willing to challenge me one-on-one in a board game. You have wisely avoided doing so at the gaming nights."
Akane gave her a wry smile. "Wisely? Because of the dreaded Mori genius?"
Snowflake nodded. "I am a strictly superior model to Kei, given the inapplicability of the Frozen Skein during the short turn times of a typical board game, and the need for creativity in devising plans. In addition, most of my gaming experience is with Kei herself, as well as the finest mind of the Nara and therefore arguably of Leaf."
"Did you know," Akane replied, "that I'm second in the triad gaming championship, with Ino in the lead and Hazō third?"
"Really?"
Akane sighed. "Another dating tip, Snowflake: try to avoid insulting people's intelligence. It's unlikely to go down well."
Snowflake duly wrote this down.
"Ino isn't a master strategist," Akane explained, "but she's very good at guessing what people are thinking, and of course she dominates social games. As for Hazō… I've known Hazō for a long time now. For example, I know that once he comes up with what he thinks is a really brilliant plan, he gives a tiny smile like this, and then I know it's going to be a little while before he decides to review it, so I should switch up my own plan so his no longer fits, and try to go for a quick victory. It's a big weakness he hasn't caught onto yet."
"This is valuable intel," Snowflake said. "Shikamaru and the rest of the Snowflakesphere will be most appreciative."
"Oh." Akane squirmed a little in her seat. "Could I maybe bribe you not to pass that on? Hazō would be so annoyed if he knew."
"That would be metaphysically impossible," Snowflake reminded her.
"Could I bribe you and Kei not to pass it on?"
"What could you possibly offer the Nara consort that she cannot purchase herself or have a minion purchase for her?" Snowflake asked sceptically.
Akane took a few seconds to think, during which time Dr Liminal and Prof. Petunia discovered an enormous stash and split it in half with utmost reluctance.
"I am given to understand," Akane said slowly, "that the sequel to the bestselling Enslaved by the Pirate King is coming out on Thursday, with a limited number of signed copies available."
"What?!" Snowflake demanded, shooting up from her seat. "Surely you do not mean to imply that either Kei or I would ever consume such indecent literature? Why, the very idea—"
Akane held up her hands. "I wouldn't dream of it. I'm just saying… If she happened to want a copy of her own for, say, market research purposes, and didn't want anyone to get the wrong idea by seeing her buy it herself…"
"Yes," Snowflake said after a moment to calm down, "yes, perhaps there may be something to your suggestion. As a senior Nara, it would behoove Kei to stay abreast of the general public's interests in regard to popular fiction. If you were to provide her with the volume in question—discreetly—I believe she might give your request serious consideration. Signed copy if you can, please."
"Sure thing," Akane said. "Also, I'm withdrawing from the temple, and claiming the unassigned seals."
"More fool you," Snowflake said gleefully. "If I have calculated the remaining cards in the temple deck correctly, which I have, then your paltry lead is about to evaporate as I draw…
"Ravenous chakra gerbils?! But there was only one left in the entire deck!"
Dr Liminal ran for her life, hard-earned seals spilling out of her pouch as the characteristic "tekeli-li" of the ravenous chakra gerbil flooded the shadows behind her.
-o-
"Magnificent," Snowflake declared as they left her first theatre performance. "Truly a work of art. The art of gastronomy, perhaps, given their mastery of ham, but art nonetheless."
Snowflake's rapidly-filling notebook suggested theatre as an excellent evening-date idea, as it provided a conversation topic rife with potential for the subsequent dinner, and indeed she could see herself extemporising on the play they had just watched for some time to come.
Akane laughed. "I'm glad you enjoyed it."
"Most certainly," Snowflake said. "I particularly admire the depth of research that must have been conducted to underpin the acting. I could almost believe that the actress playing Tsunade had bastard Senju blood, so wooden was her delivery, and her apparent inebriation only added to the verisimilitude. As for Jiraiya, I am stunned by the subtle psychological insight the actor showed by eschewing all responsibility, in this case for familiarising himself with the script. When I consider the boldness with which he strode onto the stage, only to falter when action was finally required…"
Akane's smile disappeared. "That bad?" she asked softly.
Oh.
"I have never met the man myself," Snowflake said, "but I know what it meant for Kei, a girl abandoned by her parents, to finally begin to trust again. He had a responsibility to return alive, even more so than the other parents who fell on that day. I do not blame her for her inability to forgive him."
However, this was a heavy topic, and according to Akane, those were not first date material.
"Regardless," Snowflake said, "the actor playing Orochimaru did not fall behind his fellows in conducting research. A shame, then, that in his pursuit of accuracy he chose to research a literal snake. You and I are, to our deep regret, aware from personal experience that Orochimaru does not possess an exaggerated lisp—indeed, his diction is flawless—nor fangs half again the span of my hand, nor a tendency towards belly dancing."
"Is that what that was?"
"I assume the intent was sinuous, serpentine movement. I give credit, however, to the actor for persevering with it even when Jiraiya's enormous hairpiece got caught on his fangs and flung off into the audience, or when Tsunade's kimono slipped to demonstrate anatomy worthy of the finest physician.
"It is a shame that The Lamentable Tragedy of the Three Heroes of Leaf is unlikely to have a repeat performance, lèse-majesté laws being what they are, as I found the experience delightful. Thank you, Akane."
Akane beamed. "You're welcome."
"Unfortunately," Snowflake continued, "I am out of time, so dinner is not on the cards. Thank you for a most excellent day. I have enjoyed myself greatly, and learned many useful things which will surely surprise and impress my lovers. The Snowflakesphere owes you a debt of gratitude."
She paused.
"Would you… perhaps be amenable to a second such date sometime?"
For some reason, Akane's smile disappeared in favour of a look of pure startlement.
"Sure," she finally said as Snowflake began to fear she had committed another unforeseeable faux pas. "I think I'd like that."
-o-
Voting is closed. Normal service will be resumed shortly.
Let's start with the most important point: Thank you to the wonderful and inimitable @Paperclipped who asked what he could do to help, then went above and beyond. Our contribution was "Yeah, we need to figure out these missions that Akane and Haru went on." Paper heard that and said "Will it help if I come up with an idea for the mission, stat out all the characters involved and their various jutsu and stunts, design all their combat tactics, roll out the fight on a turn-by-turn basis with added commentary to make it visual, then write it all up into a clean summary with all the rolls obfuscated?"
To which @Velorien and I, not being dumb, said: "Yes!"
The remainder of this spoiler is the summary that Paper wrote, with some light editing from yours truly. The chapter itself is simply me following the script that Paper already put together. Thanks, amigo!
o-o-o-o
A top priority message comes into Leaf: an infiltrator in Earth Country has found information that a jōnin will be arriving at the city of Nagayama at sundown, two days from now. Leaf dispatches Akane and Yuno immediately to kill or capture the jōnin. As a secondary objective they are to kill as many Nagayama ninja as possible. As a tertiary objective, destroy the city in order to deprive Rock of the resources it generates. (Command apparently did not feel the need to specify what those resources are.)
Akane and Yuno safely travel into Earth and sneak into Nagayama to rendezvous with Yamanaka Inaho, a chūnin I&S specialist. She explains that they can pull off a safe assassination without worrying about the city's backup, since all the ninja stationed here are genin. With the Gōetsu seal arsenal, she proposes a plan to implement their orders: wait for the jōnin to arrive in the city, blow them sky high from above or below, kill the genin, then loot and torch the city.
Yamanaka stashes them away so that Akane can do "clan secret" preparations for the battle (i.e. summoning Shadow Clones and waiting for her chakra to refill). While waiting on Akane, Yamanaka heads out of the city in order to watch for the enemy. She spots them coming and identifies them by their uniforms as a senior Shirogane jōnin with a pair of chūnin guards. They go to an inn, kick out the other patrons, and seemingly go to sleep. Yamanaka uses Earth Release to sneak into the cellar of the inn, where she mines it to Naraka and back with a Kagome-worthy amount of explosives and LBFs, while Akane and Yuno go around killing the genin stationed here. Yamanaka leaves an Earth Clone to trigger the mines, then sneaks out and signals to Akane and Yuno to skywalk overhead and prepare for the fight. Akane then signals her Shadow Clones, Dahlia and Begonia, who are hiding in a nearby house, to get ready to move as soon as they hear the explosions.
Akane casts two Shadow Clones (Begonia and Dahlia) and then rests for 12 hours in order to regenerate her chakra, leaving her with 180 CP. She casts Flame Aura (Effect:3) and Ghost Scales (Effect:2), bringing her to 121 CP. Yuno casts Thunderburst (Effect:?). They trigger their youthenizers down at the inn as the explosives go off.
The ninja in the inn need to make a Fantastic (TN 60) Athletics check to get out of the inn as it collapses around them.
Katsumi will use a Clan Technique (Reflexive Supplemental) to blow up something he looks at, opening a hole in the side of the inn and making the difficulty of the check Great (TN 40).
Katsumi (Athletics): ?? - ?? (Just woke up) + ? (boost) + ? (Substitution) + 6 (dice) = ??
Easy dodge!
Yakeyama, in the same room as Katsumi, will belatedly follow out of the same hole. Because of the slight delay, he'll have to make a TN 45 check.
Yakeyama (Athletics): ?? - ?? (Just woke up) + ? (boost) + ? (Substitution) - 9 (dice) = ??
Narrowly dodged!
Akane and Yuno are one vertical Zone above everyone else (and not hidden, Akane is on fire and they have Banshee seals active). The Rock ninja are in the zone with the burning inn, with the Aspect "Gōetsu-Brand Demolitions". Dahlia and Begonia are in a nearby building one Zone away, out of sight but ready to enter the action. Zones here have a default Zone border of 1 â it's a busy city with many twists and turns and obstacles.
Yuno
Supplemental: Sprint into the Zone with Shirogane.
Standard: Attack Shirogane.
Yuno (Melee Weapons): ?? + ? (boost) + ? (tag "Rolling Thunder") + ? (tag Banshee) + 5 (Skywalker bonus) - 1 (PCJ) + 6 (dice) = ??
Shirogane (Athletics, he hasn't drawn his sword yet to counterattack): ?? + ? (boost) + ? (tag Windwalker) + ? (Substitution) + ? (Invoke ???) + ? (Invoke ???) - 3 (dice) = ??
Shirogane takes a direct hit! He is going to take stress, so Yuno at last gets to use Supplemental: Grooves for Blood!
Yuno (Melee Weapons): ?? + ? (boost) - 3 (dice) - 1 (PCJ) = ??
Shirogane (Athletics): ?? + ? (boost) + ? (tag Windwalker) + 0 (dice) = ??
He takes ? stress. He removes ? with Stoneskin, leaving him with ? Mild Consequence "Slash Across the Hip Flexor", and he takes an additional Aspect from Yuno "Blood in My Eyes!"
Shirogane
Shirogane surveys the situation. There are two Leaf attackers coming from above, one of whom just attacked him and proved quite fearsome, and the other who is currently descending. Their trap was skillful, but his bodyguards managed to escape completely unscathed, and now that he has the chance to prepare himself, he'll be much better equipped to fend off the attackers. He assumes that it's him that they're going for and will act defensively as a result. He wants his bodyguards to get involved, knowing that once they start throwing their ranged techniques at the enemies, it will be much easier to fend them off.
Supplemental: Wipe the blood out of your eyes
Supplemental: Draw sword, Soul of Diamond, Unbreakable Purity
Standard: Snow-Laden Silence
Akane
Supplemental: Descend one Zone to close with Shirogane
Supplemental: Pantokrator's Hammer (Effect 3; 22 CP)
Standard: Attack Shirogane
Attempt to get Youthful Fist:
Akane (Physique): 31 + 4 (MA) + 0 (dice) = 35
Shirogane (Physique): ?? - ? (Mild) + 0 (dice) = ??
No Youthful Fist
Not too shabby! That's going to be ? stress. He removes ? with Stoneskin, giving him a Medium "Sprained Ankle" and a Severe "Shattered Collarbone". He's not going to be raising his left arm above his shoulder for a couple months.
Dahlia
Supplemental: Sprint into the Zone with the target
Supplemental: Pantokrator's Hammer (Effect 2; 16 CP)
Standard: Attack Shirogane
Katsumi takes ?? stress. He puts ? in his stress track, 2 into a Mild, 3 into a Medium, and 4 into a Severe.
Yakeyama
He oh-so-desperately wants to survive, but doesn't have an escape technique! If he flees, the Leaf ninja will just pursue him on skywalkers. Still, he has to try.
Standard: Sprint away
Yakeyama (Athletics): ?? + ? (boost) - 3 (dice) = ??
He moves 2 Zones through the city.
Supplemental: Water Wall (?? CP) on the Zone he fled through and two Zones surrounding it to break LoS.
Supplemental: Try to hide in the alleyways. The default time for this Stealth check is going to be "half a minute" â finding a good alleyway with a lot of stuff and making sure that there's no angle you can be seen at. He's instead going to have "an instant", since he's doing it with a Supplemental.
Yakeyama (Stealth): ?? - ? (2 steps up the time ladder) + 3 (dice) = ??
Yuno would like to messily kill Katsumi, but Akane's SCs can handle that and Yuno can think tactically.
Standard: Sprint in the direction of Yakeyama. She can't fail to get 2 Zones of distance with skywalkers making the effective Border 0
Supplemental: Look for Yakeyama. Standard time for this check is "seconds" â ninja are used to quickly scanning an environment for threats.
Yuno (Alertness): ?? - ? (TL up one) - 10 (nighttime darkness) - 10 (Banshee Slayers active) - 10 (Literally just looking into a fire) + 9 (dice) = ??
Nope. She notices Yakeyama and elects to close the range with him (they're in the same Zone) and does nothing else.
Akane
Standard: Sprint out of the Zone and enter the Zone with Yuno.
Supplemental: Pantokrator's Hammer (Effect 3; 22 CP)
Dahlia and Begonia
Knock out or kill Katsumi. No rolls needed.
Yakeyama
He is now aware that he can't run from the skywalker-equipped Leaf ninja, and their ally and her clone will be there soon too. Surrender is not an option. It's time to strike back with everything he's got.
Supplemental: Back away a Zone, onto the rooftops.
He's a skilled and seasoned chūnin; he's noticed that Akane has been a bit slower than Yuno was. He'll target Akane with a Blazing Vortex. He'll use one of his Technique Hacking tweaks on this to make the attack ???, paying 16 CP extra.
Akane takes ? stress from the attack, filling up her stress track (and bypassing her armor techniques!). She barely avoids taking a Consequence and suffering the FA backlash.
The explosives were set by an inexperienced hand, and that was enough.
"Windwalker!"
The world was moving in slow motion as adrenaline and chakra boiled through him. The first blast had brought him out of a sound sleep and decades of experience kept him focused as the room tilted around him. The word leaving his lips and the familiar twist of chakra in his hara sent Shirogane's ancestral power flooding through his body; swirling currents of air wrapped themselves around him, lifted him a hairsbreadth from the ground, and sped his movements.
There was no time to unbar the shutters, much less to use the door to the hallway that was busy falling into a hole. Still, not for nothing was he a ninja. One kick smashed the shutters to flinders and Shirogane followed the flinders out, the invisible hands of his air-spirit familiars lowering him swiftly yet gently to the ground below.
The moon was but a sliver and the city of Nagayama was too small for serious street lighting, yet it was not hard to locate his attackers. They were standing above him, their mouths closed yet an ear-shattering howl pouring forth. Oh, and one of them was a golden monster. And on fire.
"YOOOUUUTHHHH!" the monster cried, hurling herself towards him barely an instant slower than the crazy-faced one with the axe.
o-o-o-o
11am February 23, 1070 AS
"Whoa, you made it?"
Akane smiled. "You don't have to sound so surprised."
"No, it's not— That's not what I meant. Sorry. It wasn't—" Yamanaka Ino was a very poised young woman who rarely misstepped and never sputtered in embarrassment. Her cousin, Yamanaka Inaho, the woman stammering in front of Akane at this moment, had no such immunity despite actually being a trained Infiltration and Seduction specialist.
"It's fine," Akane said, chuckling as she took her temporary commander by the elbow and guided her to the couch. "We aren't offended, right Yuno?"
"I am not, no. Satsuko considered it, but she decided to...I believe the term in Leaf is 'listen charitably'?"
Yamanaka's training had kicked in a moment too slow but it was in effect now; she did not so much as blink at the possibility that one of her assigned beatsticks was insane and/or in possession of a sapient weapon of implausibly charitable spirit.
"Fill us in," Yuno said, settling onto the bed. The bed was in a low-cost, beaten-up room in a third-rate inn in the minor city of Nagayama in the villain-infested Land of Earth, a city into which Yuno and Akane had, as per their orders, snuck without drawing attention that might have ruined their opportunity to murder an enemy jōnin.
"He's due tomorrow. We didn't get an exact schedule, but my best guess is sometime in the afternoon. He—"
"Will there be anyone with him?" Yuno asked.
Yamanaka glanced over. "I don't see why. It's an 'inspection mission'"—she made air quotes with her fingers—"which really means a chance to get a vacation."
"Do we have a plan?" Akane asked.
"Well...you guys are Gōketsu."
Akane frowned in confusion. "Yes...?"
"She is referencing our reputation for explosives," Yuno said.
"Ohhhh. Do we know where he'll be staying?"
"Can't be certain," Yamanaka said with a shrug, "but there's only six inns in the city—"
"Isn't that a lot for a city of three thousand people?" Yuno asked.
"It is, but this place is on a minor resource harvesting route—there's a whole swath of rockskipper nests in the hills around here and their eggs are a valuable medical ingredient. Also, it's an unusually pleasant environment for Earth Country, so it gets used a lot for R&R and such."
"So you're thinking that we see which inn he goes to and then we blow it up?"
"For a start," Yamanaka said with a grin.
o-o-o-o
3pm February 25, 1070
Yamanaka's breathing showed her nerves, each breath a little faster than warranted by the three sets of steep stairs that led to this grungy little attic room in which Akane and Yuno had spent the last two days. The two had not gone out at all, not wanting to take any chance on endangering the mission by accidentally revealing themselves as foreigners. They had eaten only what they had in their storage scrolls and had not left the room even to empty the chamberpot. Fortunately, a surfeit of storage seals meant that the pot (and its smelly contents) was outside the universe whenever it wasn't in use. Still, a minor bit of misaim by a sleepy person had left the room 'aromatic', although the scent was now of harsh cleaning agents mostly-but-not-entirely masked by a large sachet of herbs. The two ninja had been waging war on the cockroach population but it was unclear who was winning, and they definitely had not slept in the bedbug colonies that were the inn's mattresses, preferring instead to use camp cots that came from more storage seals. A line of lye around each of the cots prevented nighttime invasions from the carapaced enemy but added to the stink.
"Problem?" Akane asked, popping up from the pushups she'd been knocking out for the last fifteen minutes. She grabbed a towel and wiped herself down. Yuno sat up and tucked her sharpening stone away. Her hands moved automatically, giving Satsuko a quick but thorough polish with an oiled rag and then tucking the rag away.
"He's here," Yamanaka said. "And he's not alone. There's two other ninja with him—chūnin, if their rank insignia mean anything."
"That's a lot of extra firepower for something that was supposed to be a vacation," Akane said carefully. "What exactly did you see?"
"I got up into the hills before dawn and found a hide with a clear view of the area. I bunkered down and put my camo blanket on because, by the way, it's really damn cold out there, and I waited." Her breathing had evened out as she settled into her mission report training.
"I spotted them about when you would expect if they stayed in Kiroiayama last night and got a lazy start. Plus, they were coming from that direction. That says that they aren't in a rush and probably aren't actively expecting trouble. They were wearing field uniforms, but I could still see the Shirogane crest on the leader and the rank tabs on all their collars." She tapped a finger on the telescope case that hung on her belt.
"My best guess is that one or both of the chūnin are being assigned here in order to bolster the defense. A bunch of genin is a little weak for a city this size. They're traveling with Shirogane—oh, and the fact that he's wearing his clan crest on his field uniform says that he's either very important or likes to think he is."
"Either way, it's stupid," said Akane. "Wearing a clan crest makes it easier for the enemy to predict your capabilities."
Yamanaka shrugged. "First rule of I&S: Most people are dumb most of the time and everyone is dumb some of the time. It's all about finding the areas where people are dumb and exploiting them."
"The same is true in the Mountain Cleaver style as well," Yuno said, nodding. "The primary guard stance is high, leaving the low line open, in order to lead the attacker into an expected set of engagement patterns. If they attack to the low line then a Rising to Heaven counter will deflect their attack and disable or amputate the attacking limb. If they attempt an overbearing strike through the guard then—"
"Indeed," Akane said, cutting in. It was never wise to let Yuno get too deep into her dissertations on axe combat. The day would be over and the enemy gone by the time she wound down. "Yamanaka, where are the targets now?"
"They took rooms at the Plunging Swallow, like I said they would. They kicked what I assume is all the other guests out, too. Also as I said they would." She preened a bit at that and Akane found herself bumping up the probability that the I&S girl found herself a little insecure around her heavy-combat teammates.
"I never doubted you would be right," she said with a smile. "That's why you were assigned here, after all—you're good at your job."
"It's true," Yuno said. "You make a good teammate."
Akane found herself wondering whether Yuno was simply being her forthright self or had noticed the other girl's insecurity and was intentionally working to bolster her. Either way, the blush on Yamanaka's normally pale cheeks suggested it had helped.
"Thanks. Anyway, I'd say we go for it tonight. Wait until after dinner, then plan Fire Pepper."
Most ninja chose simple terms like 'Plan A', or 'Plan One'. Yamanaka, for whatever reason, felt the need to be playful with her naming schemes. Ah well. No member of a team that used codewords like 'Earthquake Black' could criticize too much.
o-o-o-o
2:24am February 26, 1070 AS
"You're late," Yuno whispered as Akane ghosted up next to her in the alley across the street from the inn where their targets—soon to be victims—slept.
"Yeah," Dahlia said, grinning. "Begonia and I got back five minutes ago."
"I think you mean that you got back five minutes ago," Begonia teased. "Yuno and I were already here."
Akane knew that her blush was covered by the darkness but she still couldn't help feeling like it must be visible simply from the way it heated the air around her. To have been beaten by Yuno, fine. Akane could own the fact that Yuno was a better hunter and a better fighter. To have been beaten by her own Shadow Clones? That hurt.
"The last two were awake," she said, struggling not to sound defensive. "They were...ah, energetically sharing a bed. She kept me busy while he went out the window." She forbore to mention that she had caught her foot on the windowsill when she went after the escapee and the momentary stumble had nearly allowed the other ninja to get away.
"It's fine," Yuno said. "We all got ours, so as long as none of yours got away they should all be dealt with." She snorted and shook her head. "I am unimpressed with Rock's combat training. They were sloppy. Multiple lines of attack open, poor footwork, and terrible centering."
"They were only genin, Yuno," Begonia said.
Yuno sniffed derisively but forebore to comment. "Yamanaka went into the basement ten minutes ago. She should be back any time—"
"She's back now," said the girl in question, dropping down from the roof above with an expression of delight at the fact that her teammates clearly had not heard her approach. "The timers are set for ten minutes. With as much stuff as you guys gave me I expect the place to turn to kindling."
Akane chuckled. "Pah," she said, waving one hand in grand dismissal. "It was only a hundred tags. Barely worth mentioning."
Yamanaka snorted. A hundred tags was more than enough to turn the Plunging Swallow into wreckage in seconds. Which was good, because it meant the staff were unlikely to suffer much. None of the three Leaf ninja had been happy about the collateral damage, but there was no way they wanted to engage a jōnin and two chūnin if they didn't have to.
"Time to get into position," Yuno said. She leaped upwards and then kept going, running up the notional staircase that was her skywalkers.
Yamanaka's face was a study in conflict—mostly guilt at being left behind from the fighting and frustration at knowing she wasn't fit for the task. Akane paused long enough to squeeze her shoulder and give a respectful nod. "You did your part," she said. "You found them, you predicted them, and you mined the building. Yuno and I couldn't have done any of that. Each to their specialty."
Yamanaka covered Akane's hand with her own and gave her a weak smile. "Thanks. Now go show these losers how awesome Leaf ninja are."
Akane grinned, white teeth flashing in the dim moonlight, and ran up into the sky, her fingers already prepping the relevant handseals for her favorite battle jutsu.
o-o-o-o
2:36am February 26, 1070 AS
The whump from below was enough to jolt Katsumi awake. He didn't know what had awakened him but it didn't matter; any ninja who made it to chūnin knew that it was better to react to a false alarm than to not react to the real thing. He looked over at the window shutter and twisted his chakra along the pattern of his bloodline. "Explode!"
He was out the shattered remains of the window even as the room started to collapse under him and well before the fragments of detonated wood had touched the ground outside. For the hundredth time over the course of his career, he found himself grateful for the long-gone wisdom of his Academy teacher: In the field, always sleep in your clothes with your boots on.
Yakeyama was a slightly heavier sleeper and reacted slower; the collapsing building slapped at his ankle as he dove through the window, sending him into a tumble and making him land hard. Had he slept in a room of his own there wouldn't have been time, meaning that he would have died if he hadn't been so stubborn about insisting that the two of them share a room "for safety." Granted, it had really been because this was the second-best room in the inn and neither he nor Katsumi were willing to settle for third-best. (Shirogane, of course, had appropriated the best room for himself and refused to share, the pig.)
He hit the ground, felt the breath woosh out of himself, and forced himself to roll back upright. The inn was slumped over like a punch drunk fighter and, just like that fighter, it went to its knees and then collapsed into a stumble of broken wood and chimney brick. The crash of the building was nearly drowned out by the screaming from above. It sounded like the end of the world and when Yakeyama managed to force his head up against the constriction of his diaphragm it was to see an impossible sight: two raging kami standing on the air, one of them in the form of an axe-wielding woman and the other a golden-glowing clawed monster wreathed in flames. Before he could blink away the shock they dove, racing headfirst down towards the east side of the ruined inn, some sort of explosive blast speeding their steps.
The east side was the side that Shirogane would have escaped to. Yakeyama lurched to his feet and hurried to rescue his superior, desperately trying to draw breath as he ran.
o-o-o-o
The madwoman with the axe was on him before Shirogane could shift ground. His fingers flicked through the Stoneskin jutsu as he twisted frantically aside, the friendly hands of his air spirit familiars pushing him away from the inhumanly sharp blade. Even with their help, he wasn't fast enough; it sliced through the Earth-natured chakra that protected him, sliced through his hip with a cut so clean it felt like nothing more than a cold streak, and flicked upwards, splattering blood into his eyes and making him flinch.
He turned the flinch into a leap, opening a few feet of distance between himself and the crazy axe murderess. Midleap, he dragged one sleeve across his eyes and blinked away the sanguine barrier. The golden monster with its sheath of fire was half a second away and would need to be dealt with, but his bodyguards had escaped the inn as well and were racing towards him.
"Keep her busy!" he shouted to Katsumi and Yakeyama, pointing with his left hand towards the woman with the axe. With his right he drew his sword, Flenser. A whispered "Soul of Diamond!" calmed his chakra flows and balanced his humors, bringing the world back into a smooth and comprehensible pattern.
Barely had the words left his lips than the monster was on him with a shouted "Pangolin Clan Technique: Pantokrator's Hammer!"
Up close it was revealed the monster was actually a human, a kunoichi wrapped in a flaming golden chakra construct—some sort of scaled monster with claws like massive scythes.
He flowed forward as she came down to meet him, his feet and blade and body twirling through the defensive Darting Wolves form. Jets of fire lashed out from her body, cutting out segments of the arc the form would have traversed and compelling him to move into her reach. The Wolves redirected without effort, looping Flenser around himself as he spun through a series of tight turns that left no safe angle of attack for an enemy.
She thrust at him, twin palm strikes from which erupted a pair of massive Air Element strikes. He deflected the first with the flat of Flenser but the second caught him in the shoulder and flung him backwards. A sick crack! in his right collarbone took the strength from his limbs and the breath from his body. He stumbled, his ankle rolling under him and almost sending him to the ground.
Movement flickered to his right. He was still off-balance when the metal slug hit him on the chest, just below his shattered collarbone. The impact was painful enough on its own but the grinding of bone shards made the world go white around him. He tried to spin into the Darting Wolves but he couldn't raise his arm high enough and his shoulder screamed when he tried. Fortunately, the woman coming for him was the identical twin of the one in the construct, and therefore almost certainly an Elemental Clone of some type. Those were useful as distractions and area denial, but—
"Pangolin Clan Technique: Pantokrator's Hammer!"
The clone's punch hit him in the face and the world went away.
Author's Notes: Ugh. Sorry, this is all I can do. Suffice to say, it worked out: as you can see from the combat log in the spoiler, after Dahlia punched Shirogane's lights out, Begonia killed Katsumi while Yuno chased down Yakeyama and gutted him like a trout. Once Shirogane was secured the Shadow Clones unsummoned themselves in order to restore a bit of chakra to Akane. As per their orders, the three ninja then let as much of the city on fire as possible, taking care that the city food warehouses were well torched. They made it home without incident and Shirogane is now in T&I.
The summary of recent events goes:
Feburary 13: Haru is deployed on border patrol. Akane and Yuno are deployed on Mission 1: scouting Rock.
February 20: Haru, Akane, and Yuno return
Feburary 22: Akane and Yuno are deployed on Mission 2: securing Shirogane
February 27: Akane and Yuno return (this is the day of Chapter 493 and 494, presumably)
February 28: Akane and Yuno's day off
Akane and Yuno are being sent out tomorrow to head up the Rock/Fang border. They're expected to be gone for a week.
XP AWARD: 15 I'm unsure what to do with the XP award here, since I'm fuzzy on whether or not XP has been awarded for this time period, and also it's not based off a player plan. Still, it was about an in-game week and I'd rather err on the side of generosity, so let's call it 15. However...
"GM had fun" XP: 100
+100 for @Paperclipped going so far above and beyond to make our lives easy. Given how badly I've crumped it lately, this update would not have happened at all without your hard work. Thank you.
Vote time! What to do now?
Voting ends on Wednesday, February 9, 2022, at 12pm London time.
It was a grim and miserable morning at the Gōketsu estate.
Yesterday had been a challenging day, from dealing with Kei Ruri and the Pangolin issue to beating his head against the Great Seal replica for the Nth time. Then, just as Hazō was ready to collapse, Akane and Yuno came home from their mission, safe and even triumphant. It should have been an evening of celebration, and Hazō had certainly tried to make it one with a full-scale family dinner. Instead, Akane had headed straight to her room, claiming tiredness, and Yuno had been left to regale the Gōketsu with tales of how they and their Yamanaka teammate had killed two skilled chūnin and captured a jōnin of Rock's ruling clan without a scratch on them… and then wiped out food stores intended to feed thousands in winter, and walked away as the town burned. With the mission taking place late at night, the civilian population had all been home and asleep, or in some cases cowering indoors after hearing the explosions of ninja combat, meaning horrendous initial casualties from the fires that left the townspeople in no state to rescue their food supply (or block the flames from spreading across the tightly-packed buildings of the mountain settlement).
The flames still dancing in Yuno's eyes as she acknowledged her responsibility for thousands of civilian deaths were not encouraging, but Hazō was willing to leave that entire mess to Noburi. He was too busy trying to figure out what on earth to do about the girl who considered every death a tragedy, yet now had a kill count that made the Sunset Racer look like Academy detention material. Hazō had wrestled with his thoughts all night, and come up with nothing resembling a solution, but as Akane's clan head and her boyfriend, he couldn't leave her to suffer on her own.
"Good morning, Akane."
The love of his life was in her rooftop garden, as was her morning routine come rain or shine (Mari had taken over caring for the plants during Akane's missions as her gardening junior with excellent reflexes; Snowflake, who had helped draft the safety protocols and was functionally immortal, generously filled in using her new freedom on days when both were out). She watered the plants one by one in silence as she stared into the distance.
"Hello, Hazō."
Hazō took a few tentative steps closer to her. His instinct was to reach out, maybe to pull her in for a hug—there were few better ways to start a day than an Akane hug—but he restrained himself. It was dangerous to distract her while she was within attack range of the friskier perennials, and besides, for once she might not be in the mood.
"Your right hand…"
Akane hadn't been injured gardening in months, not since she'd finished taming the mandragora.
Akane looked down at the bandage as if noticing it for the first time. "It looks worse than it is. I've already taken the antidote. It won't be a problem for the mission."
She returned to watering the plants in silence.
Hazō waited. The sense of wrongness persisted. Even a tired Akane normally gave off a stable glow, especially on overcast days like today, when the inferior celestial sun was slacking off on the job and the contrast was more noticeable. Instead, it continued to be a grim and miserable morning, the kind he hadn't seen since the Haru affair.
There was a clunk as Akane replaced the metal watering can in the supply shed.
"Akane," Hazō interrupted her as she reached for the fertiliser. "I didn't get to see much of you yesterday. Do you feel like hanging out a bit before you go out again tomorrow?" The spectre of Gaku hung over his shoulder, reminding him that this morning had been allocated to catching up on end-of-month reports from Gōketsu-affiliated businesses like the Ishihara Workshop. He told it to screw off.
Akane looked down at the bag of fertiliser she'd been reaching for. "Yeah, sure," she said vaguely. "What did you have in mind?"
-o-
You could tell a great deal about a person from the general feel of their room, Hazō believed. His was a place of intellectual stimulation, with diagrams on the walls and wooden models of various inventions that otherwise existed only in his dreams littering his desk. Noburi's was theoretically a place of hospitality, with a door open to set degrees depending on his degree of availability, and a variety of teas and snacks on the other side, but these days it was mostly a place of Yuno, despite her having her own room, and reviewing those living arrangements with them was just another thing on Hazō's to-do list. Kagome-sensei's was a fortress of security, with individual defences and everything arranged just so in order to instantly give away an intruder having gone through his things. Kei's felt somewhat hollow now that she had taken everything of emotional significance with her to the Nara, and did not visit overnight for Mari reasons, but it had once been a place of solitude in the safety of books, writing supplies, and jealously-guarded mementoes. Mari's was… complicated. It should have been a boudoir, Hazō thought with his vaguest of awarenesses of what a boudoir was supposed to be, but the dressing tables and mirrors and languorously-draped clothes and such had bowed to the incursion of a different life. A complete collection of Icha Icha lined the walls. That red haori hung from a hook as if waiting for its master to put it on before heading out. Hazō didn't know what was in the papers in one corner of Mari's work desk, but she'd retrieved them from Jiraiya's notes after Kagome-sensei had given them the all-clear for potential encryption, and never shown them to anyone.
Akane's room was a place of peace. Potted flowers, curated by Ino for maximum safety, stood beneath the broad, open windows. Drawings from the estate's civilian children (and a couple signed "Honoka") decorated the walls. A Church of Youth reprint of Maito Gai's Guide to Attaining the Spirit of Youth had a little stand of its own in the corner. Akane's bed—
Akane's bed was neat with the blankets tucked in, much like a bed that had been carefully made before going on a mission (it was one of Akane's more morbid habits, like making sure her will was up to date), and not used since.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Hazō burst out. He'd meant to just spend time with her, doing whatever, and hope his presence was reassuring enough for her to talk to him if she was prepared to, but he couldn't watch her suffer and pretend nothing was wrong. He just couldn't. If there was any chance that he could make things even a little bit better…
"I can think about it after the mission," Akane said, walking over to a window. "I mustn't get distracted."
"OK," Hazō said.
For a while, she just looked out the window. Hazō waited, with no idea what to do next.
"I can still see the flames," Akane said in a soft, barely-there voice. "I thought they'd go away by now. I always recover quickly. But I can see them. I can hear the screams. People begging for help. I wanted to help them. Yamanaka said it was better for them to spend a few minutes dying in a fire than to spend weeks starving to death. I had nothing to say to her. She said I shouldn't put faces to collateral damage. I tried to reason with her, before. I tried, but I couldn't think of anything. She was a more experienced ninja, and better at arguing. I didn't know anything Lord Hokage didn't. I realised, after the first granary, that I could knock her out. Take her back to Leaf and face court-martial. Yuno wouldn't help. She said she wouldn't let her best human friend get executed for a bunch of strangers. They were probably evil anyway because most people were. There were houses collapsing in front of us. I couldn't knock her out because I wouldn't be able to carry her and Yamanaka and Shirogane. I had to help with the fires. I'd be a hypocrite if I made them do the dirty work alone. When we brought down the inn, I told myself it couldn't be helped about the people inside. Killing that jōnin would save Leaf ninja. It would end the war faster and save more lives. I said we only had to burn the granaries and warehouses. Yamanaka said the people were already dead. We were just destroying infrastructure so Rock couldn't use it again. Why did it have to be fire? Fire hurts."
"Akane," Hazō said. He didn't know if he wanted to stop her because she was getting stuck in a loop and it was only getting worse or because he couldn't listen anymore. "I am so sorry."
"It's like this in my head," Akane said. "Over and over. I don't know why. It won't leave me alone. I think that's fair. Being dead won't leave those people alone either. I'll be fine, Hazō. Lots of ninja must be like this on the inside."
Hazō's blood ran cold. He had to do something. He couldn't let Akane be like this. He already didn't know how to help Kei or Snowflake with the self-hatred and pessimism enshrouding them. He didn't know how to help Yuno with her brokenness. He didn't know how to help Kagome-sensei with his paranoia. He didn't even know what was wrong with Mari. Ami was Ami. He couldn't let Akane join them.
"This isn't your fault, Akane," he said. "Do not shoulder the blame for this. You are not the reason we live in a terrible world where ninja have to commit atrocities to survive, and blaming yourself will not help you undo them. I wish I could undo the Sunset Racer, but I can't, and no amount of blame will bring me closer."
Akane's eyes widened incredulously. "How is it not my fault, Hazō? I set the fires. There is nobody else to blame."
"You were trying to protect Leaf and end the war faster," Hazō said. "And you were following orders. I'm not saying that's any absolution—I know I don't feel absolved either—but you didn't do what you did arbitrarily. There is a reason it happened this way, and it is not you."
"No," Akane said. "I was following Lord Hokage's orders. I was following the…"—her voice caught—"the Will of Fire."
Hazō winced on the inside. This was not a good association for a Leaf ninja to develop.
"I always follow orders, like a good girl. Like a good ninja. I've had my one chance not to burn a town. If Lord Hokage orders me to join a scorch squad, that's who I am now. At least it means somebody else won't have to do it."
"This isn't about you, Akane," Hazō insisted. "It's not about Asuma either. He's locked into taking the actions he has to take, just like you are. It's about the system that keeps the world in a race to the bottom, where killing civilians is another thing that makes sense because not killing them is treated as a weakness which other people will take advantage of.
"The whole thing is an antlion pit. Even here in Leaf, when we tried to use scrip to benefit people, somebody else had to take advantage. Of course war is going to be nothing but atrocities when the people who make the calls are driven by this competition where the worst move wins.
"If you want to live by your ideals, if you aspire to something better than this disastrous status quo, then the world will punish you whenever you deviate from the competition."
Akane shook her head. "I'm not living by my ideals, Hazō. Weren't you listening? I killed thousands of people. Not one of them deserved it. Nobody deserves to be killed, but they weren't even a threat. They were just living their lives. I'm not being punished for being a good person in a bad world. A good person would have stopped them, whatever it took. I'm a hypocrite who'd rather kill thousands of people than… than…"
Hazō struggled for something to say. It was clear to him, crystal clear, that Akane had been cornered, that the fault was with the environment that forced good people to do bad things, not with somebody who always and relentlessly tried to do her best. He felt a seething hatred for the shinobi world that would do something like this to one of its few innocents, and forced it down because it wasn't helping.
"I should leave the clan."
Wait, what?
"What did you say?" Hazō demanded.
"Somebody like me can't be part of Uplift," Akane said. "I've betrayed everything Uplift stands for. Your loyalty's always been to Uplift first and Leaf second. So has everyone else's. I just failed that test, and there's no going back."
"No," Hazō said without hesitation. "I forbid it. You are not going anywhere.
"Akane, nobody can't be part of Uplift. Being forced to do one bad thing does not disqualify you from wanting to make the world a better place. Do you still believe in Uplift?"
"Do I believe in anything?" Akane asked. "Or am I just empty? Lee told me to believe in Youth, so I believed in Youth. You told me to believe in Uplift, so I believed in Uplift. Lord Hokage told me to kill thousands, so I killed thousands. No amount of fixing worlds or systems can fix someone who thinks like that.
"I'm grateful to you for having faith in me, Hazō. I really am. But I'm not the person I thought I was, and I'm not the person you thought I was either. I'll talk to Kei when I get back from the next mission, and hopefully she can find something useful for me to do where I won't let anyone down.
"I'm sorry, but I really should be getting on with mission prep now. I've got equipment to prepare, and maps to memorise, and I want to get some last-minute athletics training in while it's light. Thank you for taking the time to talk to me."
And then Hazō was outside her room, just like that. He would not under any circumstances let her leave the clan, legal rights be damned, but in the meantime… it seemed an Uplift speech was not the right tool for the job. He really should have considered explosives.
-o-
You have received 3 - 1 (Brevity) + 1 (Fun-to-Write) = 3 XP.
-o-
What do you do?
Voting ends on Saturday 12th of February, 1 p.m. New York time.
The enormous dog cocked his head. "Something is troubling you?" He lay down in the grass. "Come, sit."
Hazō sat down with a sigh and leaned against the massive dog's warm furry back.
"You know," Hazō said after a moment, a tired smile in his voice, "'come' and 'sit' are commands that humans give to their pets on the Human Path. Not very polite when directed to other humans."
"Fortuitously, I am not a human. Now, I believe Kakashi had an appropriate phrase for this situation: what has your panties in such a square?"
Hazō frowned and craned around so he could look at Cannai, although he couldn't see the dog's face from here. "'Panties in such a square'? That doesn't make any sense. You can twist panties, you can ball them up, you can tie them in a knot, but you can't turn them into a square."
"I confess I had wondered about that. I never asked; Kakashi had a strange sense of humor and I refused to be baited. It is nice to have the question settled."
"Glad I could help." Hazō chuckled and leaned back again. "I could use some advice, if you're willing? It's about a mission that the Hokage ordered."
"Hm. I would assume such a thing would be highly classified. Are you sure you should be telling someone outside of your 'Leaf' pack? The information might leak to your enemies."
Hazō thumped his head against Cannai's back. "My enemies, all of whom are in a different dimension from you and have no way to get here? Those enemies?"
"You don't know," Cannai said, hurt. "I could leak the information if I wanted to. For all you know I have many friends on the Human Path that I could talk to."
"There's only one Scroll."
"So? Maybe there are portals to your home around every tree. You don't know. I might have lots of friends in that Dirt place. Or the Cloudy City."
"They're called 'Rock' and 'Cloud', as you would know if you knew anyone from there."
"Alas, my cunning gambit is revealed. What is the problem?"
"Remember I've told you about Akane?"
"Your girlfriend slash pack mate slash subordinate slash apprentice? The one whose heart shines like the sun and lifts you from the bleakest mood, whose welfare you care about without measure, who is amazingly good at taijutsu and incredibly strong and sometimes forgets not to squish you with her hugs, who has the cutest little pattern of freckles on her lower back, whose honesty and integrity humble you and make you want to be a better person? No, you've barely spoken about her."
"Hrmph. Yes, well, she and Yuno and a Yamanaka got sent on a mission recently. They were sent to the city of Nagayama to kill or capture a Rock jōnin, which they did. They were also ordered to destroy the place in order to deny Rock access to its resources. Which they did. They burned it down and destroyed all the stored food, in the middle of winter. Several thousand people were burned to death and the survivors are going to starve."
"I imagine Akane is taking it poorly?"
"That's an understatement. She's talked about leaving the clan, which would be bad enough, but I'm worried that she might kill herself."
"And you don't know what to do."
"And I don't know what to do."
Cannai sighed. "It is hard to see one that you love suffering. Harder still when you are their leader and it is your duty to protect and support them."
"I know, right? What can I do?"
"I'm afraid there is no simple solution. There is no magic or potion that will take away her pain. It will require time, and support, and much introspection. What about Mari? She is Akane's teacher, is she not? And skilled with people?"
"She is. You're saying I should delegate this to her?"
"I'm saying that you should enlist her aid. Humans are very different from dogs, so perhaps what works for us will not work for you. Were one of my children experiences pain like what you describe it is usually the result of a loved one dying. In such a case, the pack would close ranks to support them. They would receive attention, and companionship, and touch. Dogs are pack animals; we respond well to tactile contact. Unhappy dogs will find themselves ruthlessly cuddled by the puppies, with older dogs ready to chase the puppies off once they become annoying. Adults will be available to talk whenever the grieving dog wants it. Food will be brought to them and left nearby. We do not crowd them or overwhelm them, simply be nearby and offer support. When there is a bard nearby they will sit and talk with the grieving person. Ask them about the person they lost, listen carefully to the stories, and help to keep the memories alive."
"Kagome-sensei says that a person lives on the Naraka Path so long as anyone remembers them. That they have to watch their bodies and minds fading slowly as the living forget you one memory at a time. Only when all trace of you is lost do you finally find peace."
Cannai snorted. "Kagome-sensei sounds like he is in urgent need of a puppy pile. And like he would be no fun at all during a ballyhoo."
"A what now?"
"A ballyhoo. It's a social event. Dogs come together, sometimes multiple packs, share food and stories, play games. A festival."
"That sounds like fun."
"Indeed. Although not if this 'Kagome-sensei' were there."
"Don't be mean. He's very nice."
"Hm. In any case, I fear that I have no greater wisdom to offer."
Hazō sighed. "Yeah, I didn't think there would be an easy answer." He paused. "Do...would you mind if we just stayed here for a bit? It's nice, and it's quiet and peaceful, and once I go back it's going to be the opposite of that."
"I have nowhere else to be and had thought to have a bit of a nap. You are more than welcome to join me, provided that you don't keep me awake with your snoring."
"I don't snore."
"Mm-hm. Kakashi snored like a landslide."
"I'm not Kakashi."
"Hidenori snored."
"I don't know who that is, but I'm not Hidenori either."
"An earlier Summoner. Very well. You may stay. If you are not here when I awaken, know that my well-wishes go with you. I hope Akane recovers soon."
"Thank you."
o-o-o-o
"Kagome-sensei?" Hazō slapped softly on the granite doorframe.
"Hm? What?! Oh, it's you, Hazō. Come in, come in. I was, uh, making some notes. Yes, making notes! Being very productive."
The claim seemed unlikely, given that Kagome-sensei had been sprawled back against the headboard, a book spilled across his lap, his mouth hanging open and drooling slightly. Hazō forbore to comment on any of that. Instead, he settled into one of the chairs, checking first to make sure that it wasn't mined, and paused to organize his thoughts.
"What's wrong?" Kagome-sensei asked, pushing himself up and twisting so that he was sitting crosslegged on the bed, facing Hazō.
"It's Akane. I'm worried about her." He hesitated, chewing his lip for a moment. "Do you remember when we decided to come to Leaf? You said that they would make us do terrible things. Well, you were right. Several thousand civilians are dead or going to die because of what Akane and her team did. It's crushing her."
"What happened?" Kagome-sensei asked, frowning.
"She and Yuno and a Yamanaka were sent to Nagayama to capture a Rock jōnin. They succeeded, but their secondary orders were to destroy the town. They burned it down and destroyed all the large-scale food stores. It's killing her."
Storm clouds glowered across Kagome-sensei's face. "Those giant schnooks over in the Tower. I said they were no good."
"You did. And...I think it's more complicated then just 'are no good'. I think they have bad priorities and that they are too permissive in which options they will consider and which ones they won't." He clenched a fist in frustration. "They have a fertility jutsu! This whole war is happening because Rock wants more fertile land. All we had to do was teach them the fertility jutsu twenty years ago and they would have turned their own land into a paradise. They wouldn't have needed ours. This war would never have happened."
Kagome-sensei snorted. "That'll happen. Generations of hate and vengeance, you think all that's just going to get set aside so that people can do smart things that benefit everyone?"
"Can I at least hope for it?" Hazō said plaintively.
"Hope in one hand, poop in your pants, see which one overflows."
"I...don't think that's how that expression goes."
"Not the point!"
"I know, sorry." He swallowed, staring at the floor in fascination since the boring granite was vastly preferable to meeting the eyes of another human. Sensei needs some rugs, he found himself thinking.
"Would you like some rugs?"
"Huh? How does that connect? Are you planning on giving Akane rugs?"
"No, I just... It's a thing that I could actually do, a problem I could solve. A few words to Gaku and I could make the problem go away."
"I don't—" Kagome-sensei digested that for a moment. "Yes, thank you. Rugs would be nice."
"I'll get on that. Any thoughts on what to do for Akane?"
Kagome-sensei looked vaguely around the room, much like a man in deep water might look for a lifering. "Well...we could leave. If we go back to the woods, then..."
The words trailed off. He shifted around until he was leaning back on the headboard, his knees drawn up, hands wrapped loosely around his ankles.
"We can't leave," he said. "Not even for Akane. There's other people who need us too. Honoka and her family. The other clanless kids at her school. The people on the estate."
"So you're starting to like them, eh?" Hazō struggled valiantly to keep the knowing smirk out of his voice.
Kagome-sensei glared at him, then sniffed. "They aren't all the worst, I suppose. Some of them aren't completely awful. Granny Mayuka is nice."
"I'm glad. Back on topic: Any thoughts as to what we could do for her?"
"Why ask me? I'm terrible with people and I've got no clue how to handle something like this. After my bosses sent me on that horrible mission I went missing and lived in the woods for fifteen years."
Hazō smiled. "For someone who thinks he's terrible with people, you can be remarkably insightful, and remarkably caring. Harumitsu hangs on your every word, Honoka and her parents think you hung the moon and I..." The smile got wider and softer. "I wouldn't be alive without you, sensei. And I definitely wouldn't be the man I am."
Kagome-sensei's head jerked up in surprise and his cheeks went bright red. He looked away with a quick harumph! "I don't know what you're talking about. I'm a grumpy old man, that's all. Not some kind of role model."
Hazō chuckled and stood up. "Keep telling yourself that if it feels more comfortable, but there's a lot of people on this estate, and a bunch more in Leaf proper, who think you're pretty darn awesome." He nodded politely to his teacher and withdrew, ignoring the embarrassed grumbling from behind him.
Author's Notes: I'm cutting this shorter than intended due to a last-minute invitation to watch Superbowl commercials with friends.
You spoke to Gaku, and he said:
He took down a description of the stone used in the Great Seal and will attempt to find a supply of it.
He will talk to anyone he can find who would know anything about geology or geometry. He asked how soon you needed it and Hazō said 'a week, unless something changes'.
He doesn't know if Tsunade runs an aid organization but he will look into it. The clerks at the Tower, the Academy, and Leaf General Hospital are mostly civilian members of ninja families or survivors of clans that were wiped out. Some are completely civilian; getting a job serving in one of those places is a dream that people struggle for.
Yes, you can send GED graduates to her. He'll take care of it, although he doesn't know how much need there is. He's going to approach the hospital's lower-level administrators to start with, ask what they need, and try to find a good fit.
Other odds and ends:
You were visiting with Cannai etc so there was no time for seal research.
You sent a messenger to Kei describing the stone of the Great Seal and asking her to ask around among the Pangolins to find a supply. She returned a reply with the messenger saying that she'll get back to you.
What with everything else, you did not have time to talk to Kumokōgō.
It is now 5pm. Dinner is in an hour and Akane leaves just after dawn.
XP AWARD: 3
Brevity XP: 1
"GM had fun" XP: 1
Vote time! What to do now?
Voting ends on Wednesday, February 16, 2022, at 12pm London time.
It was a pleasant day in the Seventh Path. Not that the weather changed that often, but still. The breeze was gentle and cooling, and carried the scent of grass and earth, as well as hints of a thousand other things Canaria's keen nose could pick out. She gnawed absently on a thigh bone, running through old stories in her head in preparation for tomorrow's Taleswap.
Interestingly, despite coming up multiple times, Canaria's appearance has not even been implied as far as I could find, so here's a breed EJ likes, the Staffordshire Terrier:
The Catastrophe, an event so named for a devastating invasion of the Cats into Dog territory, centuries ago. Indeed, the word had even entered everyday language to apply to dire events in general. It was said that to this day the Cats held territory once belonging to the Dogs. The Dogs simply chose to let them keep it, for now. Obviously. What other reason would there be?(Of course, all the Clans had claimed the land of another at some point in time, but this was different.)
The Circus of Ten Fools, an ancient comedy dating back to the time of the Sage, back when the Clans were still capable of getting along with one another. The Sage had loved to laugh, it was said, and his creations had put on a show for his enjoyment. It was also said to be one of the last times he had laughed. Towards the end, he hadn't even managed to smile much. Supposedly.
The Tragedy of Glacier, one she'd heard from Kakashi, though he didn't present it much like a story. For such an avid appreciator of the arts, the man didn't seem to enjoy contributing himself.
Hmm. Shouldn't have thought of that one. A sick feeling emerged from within, and she let out a low grumble. It would be embarrassing to start publicly keening in pain so suddenly, even if it didn't seem like there were others around. At the least, Cannai would hear, and those conversations were always a bit awkward.
She still hadn't mustered the courage to listen to the story of Kakashi's final hours, though the newer Summoner had already shared it with most of Kakashi's other friends by now. For all his faults, Hazou never seemed to grow frustrated retelling the tale so many times, or the uncharitable comparisons made between the two Summoners. In fact, he almost seemed to welcome it, as if giving him something to aspire to.
What a weirdo. Then again, Kakashi was a strange one too, even for a human. In a way, it seemed it was the strange ones that needed the companionship of the Dogs the most.
Canaria's ears perked up as she heard someone approach. Those didn't sound like paws, so it must be the Summoner himself. Funny. This should be a welcome distraction. Or an unwelcome reminder.
Hazou entered her field of view, waving a hand of greeting and a smile. She resisted the urge to stiffen, mind winning over instinct. Why did humans bare their teeth when they were being friendly? So confusing.
"Greetings Summoner. I've been meaning to thank you for inviting me to the celebration of the Battle of Five Clans. It was enlightening to finally meet the members of such distant tribes. The evening was an enjoyable one."
Hazou's expression soured, like he remembered the day much differently. "You're welcome, Canaria." He paused, thinking.
"Not that it isn't nice to see you, but what is the reason of your visit? The Grassy Hills Taleswap isn't until tomorrow night."
He scratched the back of his head. "Well… I had a favor to ask, actually."
She cocked her head. "A favor? From me? I have little to offer for your needs. As you know, I'm not one for combat or field work."
He shook his head. "No, someone who knows their way with words is exactly what I need right now."
She gnawed on her bone thoughtfully. "Make your request, then."
Some of his previous cheer returned. "I can't give out too many details, but I was authorized to tell you Leaf is interested in pursuing a Summoning Scroll. I've volunteered myself as a candidate for the mission, on the condition I can make a contract with a tracking specialist."
"Mmm. There should be plenty of those around. Do you need names?"
"No, no… Cannai's introduced me to a few already, actually. But…"
"None of them thought it was worth their time?"
He shrugged. "Pretty much. That, or they've asked for impossible favors. Canvass wanted me to find a pack of wild dogs her ancestor trained in the past, but even after I hired a dozen ninja to look, nothing came of it. So I tried asking another Dog. Canuckles wanted me to fight one of his rivals, a friendly, old, graying Dog, um…"
Canvass is a Bloodhound, which is quite appropriate for a tracking dog
Canuckles is a Pit Bull Terrier who loves a good wrestle!
"Canal?"
Here's a picture of my dog Roxi, she's nearly 13 years old now! I'm surprised both that she's lived so long and how much energy she still has left, but she has definitely slowed down with age and doesn't like wrestling with other dogs much anymore. She still loves to run and swim though, just like Canal.
She is a mutt, so we aren't entirely sure what she is. Labrador mostly, and something else that gives her slimmer/healthier legs and hips than Labs generally have. It's a big part of why she can still run and play at this age.
"Yep. Canal wasn't interested, even if she were summoned to the Human Path first for the fight, and Cannai wouldn't authorize it. I wasn't thrilled at the prospect of fighting a kindly old Dog either, so I tried asking Cannoli if he was interested in a contract, and he wanted to taste the meat of a creature known as a 'Wumbug'. He refused to describe it, insisting I would know it when I saw it." Hazou sighed audibly.
Cannoli is a French Bulldog, another breed EJ said he liked. French Bulldogs actually have one of the weaker senses of smell among breeds making for a poor tracker among mundane dogs, but it's chakra, I ain't gotta explain shit
"Well, is this hunt worth their time?"
Hazou's eyes lit up, partially from excitement and partially from annoyance. "Of course! Another Summoner on the 7th Path is another person helping us organize a resistance against the Dragons. They're another warrior to bring to the fight. They're another Clan looped into the trade network. And of course, if Leaf kept the Scroll, it gives the Dogs another avenue of obtaining information about the other Clans. Hell, I could summon some of you to talk to them if you wanted!" He mumbled, "Honestly, I feel like some people aren't taking this crisis seriously enough..."
"Hmm. And the military strength another Scroll brings your village? Or perhaps your Clan? That's not an incentive?"
Hazou blushed slightly, though his face did not react otherwise, as if it were made of stone or iron. That was telling in and of itself. Canaria had to admit it was far easier to read a human's expression when they weren't constantly wearing a mask. Well, not a physical one at least.
Hazou cleared his throat and said, "Well, yes, that's part of it too. My village being stronger means keeping the people I care about safe. That's hardly an incentive for the Dogs though, is it? Besides, my Clan's not keeping this Scroll. I'm just helping my village recover it, to do with it as they will. I won't lie to you and say I don't want it, though. I've promised Akane I'd get her a Scroll of her own and I've already been forced to pass her up twice for the greater good."
Ah, yes, the Summoner's mate. One of them, at least. His eyes got all glassy any time he started talking about her. Quite adorable.
Canaria rose from her resting position, digging up the soil and dropping the bone in. She could savor it later. Sitting on her haunches and nodding at the young ninja who watched her expectantly, she said, "It is not inherently a sin to think of how something may benefit yourself. A stronger Summoner helps our cause as much as our strength helps yours." Hazou nodded back after a moment.
She continued, "You've been our Summoner for months now, and you're nothing if not earnest to help out when you can. We feel the same way about our own, within reason of course. Kakashi became one of our own, despite his other obligations and allegiances. I suspect the same will come of you, Summoner." Hazou smiled widely at the comment. Canaria suppressed a shudder. "Besides, your other reasons regarding the Dragon Crisis bear more truth than falsehoods. It can be… challenging to say the least, to take a situation that is nothing more than abstraction as seriously as something you can see and feel and touch, but at the end of the day, the Alpha has placed his trust in you, and so will I."
"So…you'll talk to a Tracker for me?"
Canaria's tongue lolled out good naturedly. Her version of a smile, she supposed. "Please, I'm no diplomat."
"But…"
"If you want my help, I'll need to do it my own way."
Hazou gave her a contemplative stare. "Of course. Thank you, Canaria."
"Now, we're going to need a story."
Hazou scratched his chin. "Well, now that you mention it…"
<==>
Canvass suppressed a yawn that would make her seem very improper as Canting finished up a retelling of the recent Leopard skirmish in proper, exaggeratedly dramatic fashion. The Battle of Two Rivers, they were calling it. Pfah, less than ten combatants and no injuries was hardly a battle worth noting! It was nothing more than territory prodding. Subtly, she glanced across the fire toward Candy, to gauge his interest. He seemed to listen with rapt attention as Canting rattled off congratulatory poems for the bravery of the participants.
Canting is another Talespinner like Canaria, albeit an older one I believe. He's also not been described in appearance as far as I can tell, so I'm going with another EJ breed, the very floofy Newfoundland
Here is a picture of my brother's dog, Ramsey. He's about 7 or so, I think. He has the sweetest demeanor you've ever seen, like Candy. Of course, he still loves to run and play!
He is also a mutt so we're not entirely sure what he is either. Some speculation includes Broholmer, Rhodesian Ridgeback, and perhaps a hint of Boxer but it's very hard to tell.
When Canyon's stanza came up, Candy howled his approval, along with a few others. Canyon shook - as if drying off - in appreciation. Really? Candy was impressed by her use of a single Steel Bullet? Oh, look at Canyon utterly preening at the attention! Hardly worth noting, compared to Canvass' achievements. Never mind that they weren't very recent…
Canyon is a good-natured Rottweiler... and a potential love rival to dear Canvass?!
Well, what was there to track? Bison? Hardly worth her abilities. A puppy could manage that. She could follow a single drop of blood for a hundred miles! No rival Clans' scouts ever crossed more than a mile into their territory. It wasn't Canvass' fault she picked a useful, but infrequently needed skill, was it?
Canting prattled on.
"...And, duly, the rage undying,
Is the stage set for confrontation yet.
"Thank you," Canting finished, to a round of appreciative barks. "Our final story for the night will be from master Canaria, a new entry in the saga, The Tales of the Gallant Jiraiya."
Hmm, that was a surprise. Jiraiya had to be the human Kakashi talked the most about, not unlike that of a devoted fan or something. It was hard to believe there was anything left worth telling about him. She glanced across the way again, and Candy seemed as intrigued as her. Perhaps it would give her something new to talk about with him…
Canaria entered the center of the gathered circle of Dogs (and the Summoner) strewn about in the grass. "This tale was brought to me by the son of the Gallant Jiraiya himself, our Summoner, Goketsu Hazou." She gave a nod to the boy, who gave a casual salute back. "The name of this tale is 'The Forest King Dethroned'. Our story begins years and years ago, when many of us were mere pups. Clever Jiraiya sought to outflank his foes in the Village Hidden in the Mist by assembling a new Village of allies across the Ocean of the World, at the center of which Mist lay, hiding within a tempest…"
<==>
Every step Jiraiya took resounded with a jubilant thunder, echoing through the stumpy woods of Neck. They called this a forest? Perhaps he should've suggested calling it the Village Hidden in the Twigs instead! He bellowed out a laugh at his own cleverness, utterly unconcerned with hiding his presence as he strode into the clearing. He stared across the lake, taking in the scene on the small island.
"Does he have a cape?"
Of course he wasn't wearing a cape! That would be ridiculous, albeit dashing. An enemy could grab it.
"Ooo, ooo, is his hair slicked back?"
Hush, and let me tell the story!
The Clan Heads had already assembled, reluctantly kneeling before their new Mokukage, Rayden of the Dread Squirrels. Indeed, there were four massive Squirrels present already, to hammer in the power he wielded, chittering ferociously. All heads turned to view Jiraiya as he casually stepped his way across the lake.
"Rayden, buddy! You're looking good in the classic kage garb! About time this continent caught up with modern styles. I think you had the wrong address for me, though. My invite never came in the mail!"
"JEE-RYE-YAAAA!" the man hissed, enunciating every syllable to an annoying degree. "You will not stop the events that unfold today! Your world lies beyond that ocean. Our affairs are beyond your intervention!"
"And yet," Jiraiya said calmly, "Here I am." He grinned. "Besides, there's not a soul in the world that's as intimate with affairs as me. Just ask your wife." To his confusion, some of the Clan Heads gave skeptical glances to each other. Wonder what that was about.
Rayden replied, "Your petty jabs have no effect on a seasoned veteran of the shinobi lifestyle! You were a fool to come here today, for your blood spilling on the stones of this island shall anoint my eternal reign as the Mokukage, King of the Forests!" He waved his hands at the assembled Clan Heads. "My first command, ordained by the Shadow Above herself! Kill this infidel treading upon our lands!"
The assembled ninja glanced at one another, and before any of them could get any wise ideas, Jiraiya cleared his throat, aura casually unleashed. "Sure, you could try that, but I'm already picking the bits of his other followers out of my fingernails, and then I'd have to start all over." Everyone wisely moved aside, making their way away from the small island that would soon become a battlefield.
"Cowards! You will pay for your weakness when this is over!" Rayden exclaimed, his own aura of starving, ravenous squirrels colliding with the souls of the damned. The clashing tension in the air was almost physically palpable, and neither of the elite ninja managed to gain a foothold over the other in their contest of wills. Jiraiya was impressed, and his threat estimate of his foe rose dramatically. As he watched the Squirrel Summoner's face, Jiraiya had the distinct impression his enemy had arrived at a similar conclusion.
At once, they stop aiming their auras at one another, letting them lash about naturally instead. Rayden raised one fist in a salute, and proclaimed, "Come then, Gallant Jiraiya, the Toad Sage, Master of the Bedroom Arts! Show me what you're capable of!"
Jiraiya paused.
"...Like, in that order? Because, I haven't been drinking nearly enough to swing that way-"
"Squirrel Clan Technique: Veil of Chittering Darkness!"
Clouds sprang forth as if on a stormy day, thickening into an impenetrable cloud of midnight black. The sounds of gnashing, sharp, squirrely teeth reverberated throughout the cloud, obscuring the movement of the monsters within, and visibility dropped to a mere few feet.
The Tactical and Wise Jiraiya summoned half a dozen earth clones and handed them some seals. As they wandered off into the darkness, Jiraiya activated Living Roots and said, "Preferring to get right into the action, then. Good, I was getting bored anyways."
Vibrations of the earth shaped an image in his head. The nearest Squirrel was nearly 8 feet long, stalking toward the lighthouse of his voice in the sea of darkness. Or, uh, something like that. He leaned aside as it leapt at him, claws flashing. A quick slap on the Squirrel's side planted an explosive seal while Jiraiya's other hand yanked its tail, swinging it away. Sadly, he did not get to see the explosion through the darkness, though it gave a pleasant warmth to his face.
Barely perceptible through the sound of clones activating seals, along with that horrid chittering in the darkness, Jiraiya's veins blazed with a quick boost as a whooshing sound whipped toward him. He rolled to the side as foot-long shuriken blitzed through where he had been standing moments before. He cursed and dropped to the ground as he heard them change direction mid-flight, shaving half an inch off of a lock of hair. He quickly scrunched up into a ball, rolling aside as another Squirrel burst up from the ground, razor sharp incisors audibly clacking together where his head was.
A whip of lightning and thunder shot out from his grasp, catching the beast around the neck. He hauled it toward himself before caving its head in with his foot, dispelling it in an instant.
Rayden appeared where the Shuriken had been. Substitution in the darkness? So he could see through this… As Rayden swiftly but sneakily raced toward Jiraiya, Jiraiya activated his own darkness seal, catching Rayden's fist in his palm just as they were immersed in…more darkness. Jiraiya could barely even see his own hands at this point, and could probably only manage that because a faint breeze kept rippling through the miasma.
"Darkness within darkness!" Rayden proclaimed, leaping out of melee range immediately, running through some Fire Release technique Jiraiya lost the name of in the cacophony of sound around him.
Quickly trying to close the distance to his disappearing quarry while he had the sensory advantage, the Brilliant, Charming, and Gallant Jiraiya stumbled face first into a glowing orb, barely throwing up a Multiple Earth Wall in time. The explosion obliterated the wall but left Jiraiya mostly unscathed, though it pushed him back a few feet. Another Fire Globe began humming behind him and floating forth. Jiraiya hurled a kunai into it, detonating it immediately, and winced as a bit of shrapnel blasted back toward him and impaled itself in his leg. As he took a few steps back from the recoil, more humming began as Globes floated his way. Yeah, fuck that. The lake wasn't too far from his position, and so…
"Water Release: Cresting Wave!" Water flowed up underneath him, a spiraling column of water buoying him up from the ground and surging him forward. He zoomed through the darkness, orbs exploding violently behind him. The darkness was thinning already, so he unsealed a dummy. Throwing it ahead, he burst into sunlight as the dummy burst into splinters, struck by a massive lightning bolt that immediately bounced toward Jiraiya.
What? "Lightning Style: Flow Redirection!" he shouted, dropping to the ground just in the nick of time to channel the lightning and ground the incoming bolt into the earth.
His enemy seemed to be ready for this. "Earth Style: Mud Flow River!" Rayden shouted, effusing Jiraiya's hands and knees with mud, sinking him into the ground. The remaining two Squirrels and their Summoner descended upon Jiraiya, various lethal body parts primed to tear him apart.
He tugged frantically, hands trapped and unable to Substitute through the energy of the jutsu. A desperate surge of chakra pulsing through his veins, Jiraiya wrenched his hands free from the muck and flashed through handseals. "Earth Style: Heaven Reaching Pillar!" A column of earth burst up from underneath the Gallant Jiraiya at an angle, launching him upward before crumbling to bits at the impact of three simultaneous assaults. He flailed in the air, launched out over the lake in his hasty getaway. Biting his thumb, he flicked through the handseals of the mighty Summoning Technique. Splashing into the water with a grunt, he immediately emerged, standing on the back of a massive Toad squatting on the lakebed.
"Fire Dragon Bullet!" Jiraiya cried.
"Toad Oil Bullet!" Gamarayu intoned simultaneously, the deep croak resonating with Jiraiya's own voice.
A massive geyser of flame blasted forward and enveloped the entire island where the battle was taking place, disintegrating everything in sight. The heat prickled at his skin and the light of the fire was nearly blinding. The entire island was nothing but a blackened husk, now. Jiraiya huffed, pain shooting through his leg from the shrapnel.
Suddenly, his Summon popped from underneath him. He slowed his descent with a Wind technique and deftly landed on the water's surface, leaping back as the Squirrel Summoner burst up, fists swinging.
"You burrowed through the lakebed. Not bad."
Rayden pretended to wince in sympathy. "That wound on your leg looks bad. Want me to kiss it better?"
"-uh-?"
"Allow me to ease your suffering!"
The so-called Mokukage's cloak fluttered dramatically as he surged forward on the water in a flurry of punches and kicks. Jiraiya was slow, driven to exclusively block, no time for offense. His forearm caught a kick that would've taken his head off and barely stepped out of the way of a double sweep. He was favoring his injured leg, which was making it harder to concentrate on water walking. At this rate… he might lose!
He was driven back to the blackened shore, and he retreated further inland, deflecting blows all the while. No time to reactivate Living Roots, but he had some idea of where…
There! Suddenly, an earth clone surged up from the ground, immediately getting its head punted off, but not before the Goo Bomb it carried blasted goop at Rayden, who barely managed to scramble out of the way. Before the Squirrel Summoner could catch himself, Jiraiya swung a punch square in his foe's chest. Rayden gripped Jiraiya's wrist with both hands just before impact but couldn't stop the entire blow, stumbling backward and gasping.
Jiraiya had to finish it while he had the chance, rushing forward-
Rayden Substituted behind him, using the remains of the Earth Clone's head as a target. "Squirrel Clan Technique: Great Tree of the Nut God!" A gargantuan spire of rock blasted up between the two of them, massive acorn-shaped boulders dropping from the 'branches'. His leg injury slowed him down a bit too much, and after twisting out of the way of the first few, Jiraiya could do nothing but brace himself and catch the last boulder, pinning him to the ground but avoiding being crushed outright. Only his right hand was free, and no good Substitution targets were in his line of sight even if he could shift the boulder…
Rayden landed atop the giant acorn-shaped rock, kunai in hand, ready to flick it into Jiraiya's throat. "You fought well today, Jiraiya of the Three. You were a worthy opponent. Perhaps I will get to battle you again, in the next life. Any final words?"
"Just one," Jiraiya grunted, slamming his free hand into the boulder with all the strength he had left, blowing it apart, chunks flying everywhere. Rayden's foothold disappeared out from under him and he fell through the air in surprise.
"RASENGAN!" A sphere of pure chakra whirled to life in Jiraiya's free palm, slamming directly into the Squirrel Summoner's gut as he fell, blasting him across the small lake.
Jiraiya huffed and groaned, shoving a small pile of rubble off of himself. He prodded his chest. He had at least broken a rib, maybe multiple. The pain was excruciating, but he forced himself to stand. This wasn't the best place to be taking a nap. He hobbled across the lake, over to where the Squirrel Summoner had landed, finding a blood trail. How the hell did he survive that? Well, judging by the blood, he wouldn't survive for long, even if Sunny herself were here.
Eventually, he stopped in his tracks. The trail had ended, but it led to nothing. He activated Living Roots, but didn't sense any movement. If the Summoner were still around, Jiraiya didn't notice. It wouldn't be too long before the Clan Heads returned with more ninja in tow, ready to oust the man who had tried to shake up their status quo (whichever one it was that survived the fight). Jiraiya paced about as long as he dared, but he couldn't find a single trace. The Summoner had vanished.
<==>
"...and so it came to be, that Jiraiya of the Three failed in his mission," Canaria finished, after recounting Jiraiya's harrowing journey home. Not her best performance, but serviceable for the favor she was performing for Hazou. The bait was set. Now…
"Wait, what? But…he won the fight!" Canonbarru exclaimed.
"That didn't sound like failure at all," Cannakornu agreed, puzzled.
Canonbarru is a big floofy hug machine, the tibetan mastiff!
Cannakornu is a Shar Pei. Wrinkly!
Canaria clucked reproachfully. "Ah, but his mission wasn't to kill The King of the Forests. His mission was to create a strong band of ninja on foreign shores, to pressure the Village Hidden in the Mists. The other Clan Leaders hated the previous Mokukage so much they had already formed a resistance before Jiraiya could even return to try again, preventing him from ever re-attempting the strategy. Indeed, he couldn't even manage to find the Scroll of the Squirrel Clan after besting their Summoner in battle. A remarkably bittersweet failure."
"In fact, to this day, the Squirrel Clan has no known Summoner," Cannai said, taking up an entire quarter of the fireside by himself. "Even Leaf's famed Inuzuka Clan and their tracking companions didn't manage to locate the Scroll." Well, that was technically true, given that they had never tried, which Cannai knew but conveniently left out on Canaria's request.
Canaria followed Cannai's eloquent set up. "Indeed. Some legends even say they can't be tracked. Made by the Sage's own hands, the artifacts are so pristine that they are untraceable."
Some of the trackers in attendance snorted. And now, the coup de gras.
Candy called out, "Hmph. If any Clan could, the Dogs could prove that wrong! Hey Summoner, weren't you going to go look for a Scroll?"
Hazou had the decency to look abashed. With a reluctant voice, he said, "Um, yeah… Another Clan to help in the Dragon conflict and all that, you know? But, well, I'm not sure anyone was really up to the task…I get it though, I'm asking for a lot-"
"I shall do it!" Canvass exclaimed, standing in a rush. "Those meat sacks you Leaf ninja refer to as 'dogs' don't know a thing about tracking!"
"Please, perhaps a real tracker should accompany the Summoner, one with some experience," Canuckles said, standing as well. "Wouldn't want to waste his time."
"Sit down, grandpa! You can barely smell your own rear end these days! Take me, Summoner. I'll show you what a true tracker looks like," Canduright spoke out.
Canduright is a Border Collie, a very bright dog breed.
:^)
"Ah, what do you know, shrimp? A nose of your size wouldn't be anywhere near sufficient to follow a trail-" Canvass started, though the other trackers all started growling over each other. Canaria's eyes flicked from Dog to Dog. Well, this wasn't going according to plan…
Cannai stood up.
And that proved to be quite sufficient.
After the others returned to their places, Canaria cleared her throat. "Ah, well, perhaps we should finish our festivities for the night. Is everyone ready for the group howl?"
<==>
Canvass found him the next day, the only tracker of those that had spoken up to actually do so. After agreeing to a year-long contract, with the express condition that Canvass would be joining an expedition to track a Scroll, Hazou finally had to say, "I'm glad you came around Canvass. And… I'm sorry I couldn't find that pack in the Human Path. I know that was important to you."
Canvass sniffed. "It is all right, Summoner. We can't all be great at finding things. You tried. That's more than I can say about Kakashi, at the least. The man didn't give my request a single thought."
Maybe because he realized it was like looking for a needle in an entire field of hay.
"Still…would you keep an eye and an ear out for me?"
Hazou nodded. He could do that much.
"Perhaps when things cool off, we can look for them together!" Despite a droopy face that made her look almost sad, Canvass' tail wagged excitedly.
"I'd like that," Hazou said gently, but noncommittally. Unfortunately, it didn't look like things were going to be 'cooling off' for quite some time, yet he didn't want to quash her spirits so soon after she agreed to help him.
As she trotted off, he took off at a jog to meet Canaria in the same place he'd asked for the favor. Sage but it felt good to run again! He couldn't suppress a smile as he blitzed his way across the fields of Dog, chakra surging through his muscles.
"Having fun, Summoner?" Cannai asked, materializing beside him in a trot. Hazou nearly faceplanted, barely catching himself with his massive library of memorized movement.
"Um…"
"Relax," the Alpha said, tongue lolling in amusement. "There is no Dog on this path that would tease you for enjoying a run. It is one of life's greatest pleasures."
The mirth in his voice seemed to indicate otherwise, but Hazou kept his grumbling to himself. It wasn't long before they came upon Canaria, who had already dug up her bone and was munching on it contentedly.
"Summoner, Alpha, it is well to see you today," Canaria said, though she lowered her head and rested it on the ground. "Alpha, I am quite sorry for the hostilities last night."
"Do not fret, Canaria. It may have been your scheme, but you did not force those Dogs to butt heads with one another." He let out a huff. "Sometimes, conflict between Dogs takes little more than the wind changing which way it blows."
"Humans aren't much better," Hazou murmured. He shook his head a bit, before changing the topic. "Canaria, thanks for everything you've done. I'm not sure if I'm going on this mission or not, but it wouldn't even be possible without your help."
"Of course, Hazou."
"I note some frustration in your tone, Summoner," Cannai said. He didn't sound offended, just curious.
"Sorry, it's not directed at either of you… or maybe it is, or… I don't know! It's just, the literal end of days is upon us, it's no Tale to tell at a campfire, it's the real deal, and- and some days it feels like I'm the only one taking it seriously! Why was it so hard to find someone to do this mission in the first place? I'm trying to help you, all of you!"
Hazou sighed. "And I can't even be properly upset with any of you, because frankly you've been much more helpful than the humans have been so far. Asuma's contributed what resources he can as Hokage, but I can't go fifteen minutes without some of the Sealmasters getting into an argument about the proper shade of black for ink, or something… If I'm honest, Kagome-sensei is the only Sealmaster worth his salt who's willing to properly work with me, besides my apprentice, who is earnest but more out of his depth than I am. Orochimaru's done nothing but antagonize my family, and my initial requests for help from the Kurosawa have gone entirely unanswered. Everywhere I go, it's an uphill battle! They just don't get it. And I don't get them!"
Hazou panted for a moment, before tacking on a "Sorry."
Cannai rumbled a reply. "You need not apologize for speaking your mind, Summoner, but you would do well to remember your place and tailor your words. I take your concerns very seriously. I have even gone so far as to open diplomacy with our neighbors, at your request. For tasks such as this, in this case retrieving a Scroll, I must always question the motive behind the mission. I trust in your integrity and honesty, Summoner, but those you answer to have not earned my loyalty. You are young for a Summoner, and wise for your age, but far more inexperienced than many of the Summoners who have served us in the past. I cannot always trust that you are immune to those outside influences, and will not coerce my own people to do so at your whim." Cannai laid down in the long grass, his eyes now leveled with Hazou's own. "That being said, in such a short time, you have made good first impressions among my people, Summoner. Despite some of your recent missteps, might I add."
Hazou blanched, but Cannai simply barked a laugh and continued.
"It is fortunate in your case that seeing you punished like a Dog helps them see you as one of their own." Cannai graciously left out any threats for Hazou repeating his previous mistake, but Hazou had no problem imagining it on his own. "In time, they will come to respect you as they respected Kakashi. As you grow in strength, as your bonds deepen, as you integrate with them, eventually, they will unite behind you in the face of this crisis as you desire."
Hazou looked at the ground. "I'm not sure we can wait long enough for me to grow into that person, Cannai."
Cannai rose once more, stepping away with his final parting words. "The first step in getting my people to believe in you, Summoner, is to believe in yourself. Good luck on your mission."
Hazou smirked and shook his head. "Ever the poet, that one."
"I heard that!"
Canaria said, "That was quite the exchange."
Hazou had almost forgotten she was there. "Um, sorry if I made you look bad or anything…"
"Perish the thought, Summoner. That said, I did have a favor to ask of you in return."
"Sure, what is it?"
Canaria pawed absently at the same piece of grass for a moment. "Would you mind… telling me the Tale of the Battle of the Gods? I would know Kakashi's final moments. It is my duty, as a Talespinner, to carry on his legacy."
Hazou nodded. "As you know, though, I'm not much of a storyteller."
"Not yet, Hazou, not yet. Some practice would do you good."
Hazou's mind painfully flashed through the reports of the battle, a clash that shook the world to the bone. So many Leaf ninja lost. Jiraiya gone. Akatsuki claiming Nagato's noble intentions to the bitter end. It was as beautiful and terrible a tragedy as any.
Today was a special day. Arguably, as far as Snowflake was concerned, every day of her existence was special, since as a conditional being, she was fortunate to be able to experience it. She would always remember Isan, where every awakening came with a reminder that the world did not need her and was quite happy to move on without her by days at a time. Doubtless, there would be many other missions in Kei's life during which she would not be able to spare the chakra for Snowflake to exist. Today, however…
Today was Snowflake's birthday. An event just for her, of all the various intelligent beings of all the Paths. An event that did not belong to Kei, for all that Kei was to be held responsible. An event, furthermore, during which some of those other intelligent beings—despite their better judgement—chose to celebrate Snowflake's existence. The Gōketsu gaming hall had been set aside for the party, with snacks and drinks and the promise of Kagome's Sautéed Nameless Meat and Edible Tree Root Special (a taste of the missing-nin days she'd missed) soon to come. Kei and Tenten were both here with the Gōketsu, as was Shikamaru despite his distaste for parties, though Akane and Yuno were sadly away on a mission. Snowflake had, after discussion with Kei, decided to invite Mari but not Shiori (whom Kei was still too mortified to speak to so long after the incident).
Yes, today was Snowflake's birthday, and in addition to the joys and horrors of being the focus of everyone's attention, there would be gifts. Snowflake could not begin to imagine what her loved ones would consider appropriate gifts for someone who had only the vaguest idea of who she was, much less what she wanted.
But first…
Hazō ascended the dais in the central room with the air of a priest about to bestow a solemn benediction on troops heading into battle.
"Friends and relatives," he began. "Before we start the celebrations proper, allow me to say a few words."
He did not get further than that.
"Oh, no!" Noburi declared in high, exaggerated tones. "A Hazō speech! Don't worry, Snowflake, I'll save you!"
Noburi ran towards Snowflake in dramatic slow motion, arms swinging, with the air of a man trying to outrun an explosion. As he reached her, he thrust his hands towards her, holding out a pair of Banshee Slayer earrings like a talisman against incoming hungry ghosts.
Snowflake looked down at them quizzically. "Are these a present?"
"What? No. Just mass-produced junk." Noburi indicated Hazō with a tilt of the head, and received a cold look in return.
"I didn't tell anyone I was planning to make a speech," Hazō said. "Do you just randomly carry utility seals around in case they come in useful sometime?"
"Sure do," Noburi said.
Hazō smiled. "That's my brother. Now, as I was saying… Exactly a year ago, the Gōketsu and the Nara were both blessed with a truly happy accident. Instead of merely creating more of the world's scariest sister"—Kei preened—"the Shadow Clone Technique created something entirely new. I don't think any of us could have predicted at the time that, after some teething troubles," which was to say, a first meeting Snowflake would not be able to recall without cringing for the rest of time, "we would gain a beloved new sister/cousin/lover/friend/Companion whom we're grateful to have in our lives. Inevitably brilliant, caring, and, dare I say it, attractive"—Kei preened some more, while Snowflake blushed—"but also with a creativity, curiosity, and thoughtfulness that are all your own… Snowflake, I'm proud to call you family, and proud to be by your side as you continue to grow and discover yourself. Happy birthday!"
There was a chorus of "Happy birthday!" from all around the room as Snowflake stood still as a statue, processing words that she was only half certain she'd heard correctly, and would surely never hear again.
"And now, I'm going to take advantage of my position as master of ceremonies—"
"Self-appointed!" Noburi called out.
"And don't you wish you'd thought of it first," Hazō countered. "I'm going to take advantage of my position as master of ceremonies to be the first to give my present. Snowflake"—he reached into a box located strategically next to the dais—"this is for you."
It was surprisingly light in her hands, and exquisitely soft. From the shining eyes to the lifelike pointed ears to the sleek whiskers, the toy black kitten was without doubt the most adorable thing Snowflake had seen in her brief life. She had to resist a sudden overwhelming impulse to hug it to her chest.
"Hazō," she said coolly, "while I appreciate the gesture, what makes you think a toy kitten is an appropriate gift to give an adult woman who was mercifully able to skip all of the horrors of childhood?"
Hazō grinned. "That's exactly why!"
"What do you mean?" She would not hug it. Not in public. It would be the death of her and Kei's carefully-cultivated image as mature and responsible individuals who deserved to be taken seriously at all times.
"I figure," Hazō explained, "that precisely because you missed out on having a normal childhood—or whatever childhood would be normal for a Mori; I'm pretty sure it involves more tests than mine did—you ought to have an opportunity to explore how you feel about the things you never got to experience. And, all things considered, a black kitten seemed like an inevitable choice."
"Does she—does it have a name?" Snowflake asked casually.
"How about Mewramasa, the Devourer of Unworthy Souls?"
Elegant. Tasteful. Possessed of both species-appropriate playfulness and mythological flair. Yes, it was exactly the kind of name… wait a second.
"Hazō," Kei demanded as the temperature in the hall plummeted faster than the first hundred Hazōlator prototypes, "how do you know that name?"
Hazō took a reflexive step back at her expression. "Oh. Oh, I… um…"
He looked around for help, but none was forthcoming. The rest of the family was either bemused, apathetic, or gleefully curious to see how Hazō would get himself out of whatever mess he had gotten himself into this time. Snowflake herself certainly looked forward to learning what kind of invasion of their joint privacy could have been deep enough to uncover personal memories Kei would never willingly share with anyone. Depending on the answer, she might assist with the execution.
Finally, Noburi made the sealmaster handsign for "cognitohazard" (Kagome had forced them all to learn the basics) behind Kei's back.
"Ami!" Hazō exclaimed. "Yes, it came up when Ami was telling me stories about your childhood. That's all there is to it."
"I see," Kei said. The fireplace began to warm the room up again. "I shall have to have words with my dear sister upon her return regarding topics suitable for public consumption. If she is under the mistaken impression that I cannot dredge up embarrassing childhood stories about her…"
Hazō, who should have been relieved at his narrow escape, had curiously gone even more pale.
"Oh, she's away?" Noburi asked. "That explains why I haven't been able to get hold of her. Any idea what she's doing?"
"She is away on a mission," Kei said. "Something about chaos answering and necessary escalation. It was quite cryptic."
Hazō's face was practically white now. Could he have been overworking himself? Was there some way Snowflake could help him relax?
"Wait," he said distantly. "Why are you trying to get hold of Ami?"
"Pranking training, duh," Noburi said. "She says I'm a natural who just needs to cast off the remaining shackles of so-called common sense before I can access the true power of pandemonium that is a prankster's birthright."
"Sage's ballsack," Hazō said, shoulders slumping as if the weight of the world was proving too much for them at last. "Is that the reason I woke up the other morning to find that my Earthshaping practice rock had turned into a stone carving of an O'Uzu fertility symbol? Same kind of rock and everything?"
"No," Noburi said innocently, "that was just you using ninjutsu in your sleep. Don't worry, it happens to a lot of teenage boy ninja."
Hazō sighed.
"Much though I appreciate the sight of a foolish sibling taking his first halting steps towards imitating the avatar of perfection that is Ami," Kei said, "the rest of us also have gifts to present. Snowflake, I believe you already know what this is." She proffered a slim volume with a colourful cover, which Snowflake accepted reverently.
The latest volume of Dauntless: The Adventures of Yukihana Kyōko had been printed only yesterday, the dramatic revelations within yet to reach most of its small but growing audience. Kei would, naturally, receive her own free copy, but this one… this one was Snowflake's alone.
"In this month's story," Kei explained for the benefit of the others, "the identity of the masked Ice Assassin with whom Kyōko's party has clashed time after time is revealed to be Kyōko's long-lost twin sister Koyuki.
"Is there hope for reconciliation between the sisters, or are they doomed to battle to the death?" she recited in a deadpan voice. "What happens when Nobasu, the playboy bard enchanted by Kyōko's looks, finds himself tempted by her evil counterpart? And what of the Nari the Cat Sage's prophecy that a Yukibana kunoichi will either save or destroy the world? Only this month's volume holds the answers."
"Nobasu the playboy bard?" Noburi repeated. "Really?"
"I understand his mixture of easygoing charm and conventional good looks is popular with the female demographic," Kei said, "while his role as comic relief, with his barrel of saké which he carries with him everywhere, appeals to younger readers. Some even consider him Kyōko's canon love interest, distasteful as the idea is to a more sophisticated reader."
For now, the poor literacy rates even in Hidden Leaf restricted Dauntless's commercial appeal. Snowflake was considering advising Shikamaru to invest in the Gōketsu Education Department, or to start his own superior version, in order to address this problem with all haste. With sufficient progress in the field of human intellectual advancement, weekly publication could turn out to be more than a pipe dream.
Snowflake would not leave a corpse when she finally died. There would be no urn with her ashes, no name engraved on the memorial stone (she was not a Leaf ninja), nor a soul to enter the cycle of reincarnation. Then, those with memories of her would also perish, and when the Sage of Six Paths finally returned according to the prophecies, he would find no evidence that Gōketsu Snowflake had ever existed. Any record of her, however fictionalised and distorted, however trivial, was a challenge to this inevitable oblivion. (Also, redeemed villains had the best story arcs. This was known.)
"If this humble bard may speak," Noburi interrupted her thoughts, "I also have a present for you. I figured that you don't have much by way of possessions, and it must get annoying having to borrow stuff all the time, so think of this as a way of giving your own collection a kick-start."
He placed a stack of boxes on the table next to her. Reavers of the Human Path. Bear Horror. Ninjutsu Samurai. Kage Hunters. Uncannily, they were all games she had enjoyed at past gaming nights and yes, would have wanted to be able to play at her own leisure (Ninjutsu Samurai and Bear Horror were particularly fine choices, as with the Shadow Clone Technique, setup actually took less time than the games themselves).
"I also ordered you your own deluxe game shelf from the Ishihara Workshop. They're swamped with orders right now and we're not the kind of clan ninja overlords who mess up people's businesses for our own convenience—which has not gone unnoticed, BTW—so look forward to that early next month."
Snowflake nodded gratefully. She wondered if she could persuade Kei to give her an afternoon off so she could try an all-Snowflake game of Kage Hunters. The insights she stood to gain regarding her own thinking processes from a team-based hidden information game were fascinating.
"Oh, I nearly forgot," Hazō said. "Here, this is for you as well."
Snowflake took the sheet of paper from him.
One Hundred Ways to Combine Shadow Clones and Exploding Tags for Fun and Profit, she read.
"Hazō…" she growled.
"Just kidding. Flip it over."
It was one of Hazō's training menus. Snowflake could tell even without reading through it from the preponderance of lists and peculiar leaps of logic (how would training in identifying signs of ambush get Kei past her current Shadow Clone Technique plateau?). If she did not already know that Hazō's peculiar ideas brought tangible results—
"Twelve hours?!"
Hazō beamed. "For now."
"Twelve hours every day?!"
"Yeah."
"Kei, is this acceptable to you?"
Kei leaned over to study the list. "Without reservation."
"Hazō," Snowflake stated decisively, "I would hug you if it were not a terrible idea on a variety of levels."
"Thanks," Hazō said. "I'll take that in the spirit in which it was intended."
"You know," Shikamaru said from the armchair into which he was busy melting, "I hear invariably positive reports about your methodology for assigning daily training. Would you be interested in discussing it at some point?"
Hazō, Snowflake could tell, considered the matter exactly long enough to realise that, with his OPSEC talents, the Nara would have Shadow Clone godhood within the week.
"Sorry," he said. "Clan secret."
"Of course. My apologies."
While Snowflake stood in a silent daze (twelve hours! Every day!), Mari took the opportunity to step into the centre of the room. Kei stepped away accordingly.
"I'm sure I'm not the only one getting hungry, so let's keep moving. Can't you just smell the delicious scent of Kagome's finest cuisine wafting in? No, me neither. Hazō, add that to your list of superior storage scroll projects. And speaking of storage scrolls…" Mari flicked her clearly empty hand through the air.
"Alakazam!"
A wooden object perhaps two metres tall and a little less wide appeared in front of Snowflake. It teetered alarmingly, but Kagome quickly stabilised it before it could make up its mind whether to fall on her.
Try as she might, Snowflake could not identify it. The pale wood reflected the light in a silvery, ethereal way, and instead of being a straight box, the object had gently curving lines that evoked a slim waterfall. Rather than carve decorative shapes, the craftsman had chosen to allow the natural, curiously striated grain of the wood to speak for itself.
She looked at Mari questioningly, but it was Kagome who spoke.
"I've been practising with those Pangolin carving tools Kei got me, on and off," he said awkwardly. "Thought maybe it was time I tried my hand at a proper project."
"And the wood?"
"Summon Realm wood," Kagome said. "Weirdest stuff I've ever worked with. Expensive as heck, too. Uh, not that I mean it was a waste of money making a present for you or anything."
Snowflake frowned, trying to reconstruct a line of causality by which Kagome would be able to obtain Pangolin Clan resources without Kei (and thus her) knowing about it.
"It was all done through Pandā," Kei explained. "Back when Kagome asked to speak to Pandā for advice on using the tools, he was actually arranging the purchase. Apparently, Pandā was not acting excruciatingly suspicious because he had betrayed me to Pantsā or developed a forbidden crush on me."
"Cunning," Snowflake said approvingly.
Kagome gave a proud smile.
"But what is it?"
The smile disappeared.
"Can't you tell?"
Snowflake studied the mysterious wooden object. It had been presented upright, so it was not a bed, chair, or un-upholstered sofa. Probably not an equipment chest either, given the dimensions. For a table, it was rather tall. Too thick to be a door. No, perhaps an armoured door, of the kind Kei had in Orochimaru's compound?
Finally, Mari put her out of Kagome's misery by pulling on a concealed handle.
"Ta-da!"
The wardrobe swung open.
As Mari watched with a smug smirk, Snowflake began to leaf through the dresses. Were these really her property now? Could she wake up in the morning and use some of her twelve hours(!) selecting an outfit that had not been purchased according to Kei's (or, more realistically, Ino's) tastes?
"Some of these fabrics and dyes are unfamiliar to me," Snowflake noted, "and Kei has memorised more import and manufacturing data than could possibly be healthy for a young woman. Are these also Pangolin-sourced? But no, Pangolins do not wear clothing, nor are these recognisable from their paint repertoire. Another summon clan? Surely you did not call for assistance from the Hokage himself in securing clothes from the Monkeys?"
"You, my dear, are too clever for your own good," Mari said. "Why would I need pangolin purchases or monkey merchandise or any summon shopping at all when by the end of my stay in Isan I had merchants begging me to buy their wares at the cheapest prices they could afford without going into debt?"
Oh. Snowflake was an idiot.
"This azure dye here? Apparently, that's a kind of chakra beetle that only lives in the mountains of Tea. It's venomous and poisonous and parasitic, but the Isanese use its shell to make pretty dresses anyway. Every once in a while, even they get their priorities straight. And the fabric of that dress there? Three-hundred-year-old trade secret, supposedly passed down from Ui himself, because obviously he was busy tailoring women's dresses when he wasn't crushing people's skulls with his bare hands. I knew I'd come up with a use for these samples sooner or later."
Snowflake examined dress after dress. When had Mari had these prepared, given that she had only recently learned Snowflake's measurements?
No, Snowflake was still an idiot. These were done using Kei's measurements, and she knew Mari had been waiting to turn her into a dress-up doll from the moment Team Uplift first came in the general vicinity of both shops and money.
Then she reached the end of the dresses, realised that there were boys looking curiously over her shoulder, turned flaming crimson and slammed the wardrobe shut with force that might have destroyed lesser furniture.
"Mari, that was a negligee!"
"Alphabetical expert on Leaf's hundred sexiest lingerie brands over here," Mari said unrepentantly. "If you think that one's something, I promise you the Snowflakesphere is going to faint when they see the ones nearer the back."
"There is no Snowflakesphere," Kei muttered. "Also, I refuse to be seen wearing that."
"Nobody says you have to wear it," Noburi commented.
"I know what I said."
"For the record," Shikamaru spoke up from his armchair, "I do not expect my consciousness to be threatened, as I have no interest in your clothing choices beyond a general appreciation of those that are aesthetically pleasing, assuming I notice in the first place."
"Shikamaru," Snowflake replied, "you did not notice when I returned from my unplanned shopping trip with Mari in a flaming red and gold tunic while wearing experimental makeup selected by a genius of seduction for maximum impact. When questioned, you speculated that I was wearing a new ribbon. I feel confident that my sartorial choices will not unduly disrupt your daily life."
"I was reading a book," Shikamaru said.
Fair.
"Speaking of books," Shikamaru said, "and moving swiftly away from a topic which I suspect will only earn me additional female resentment if pursued, I do in fact have my own gift for you."
He reluctantly extricated himself from the armchair to hand her an old-looking scroll.
"These are the private notes of Senju Tobirama, containing unstructured philosophical musings, frustrated rants, and various other materials of a personal nature which he saw fit to commit to parchment at various points in his later years. Naturally, they are not publicly available, presenting as they do a demigod in an all-too-human light, but you would be amazed how far Nara clan head clearance, mastery of archive navigation, and a high threshold for boredom can get you.
"If the Second's notes on the Shadow Clone Technique specifically still exist, they are strictly on a need-to-know basis and neither you nor I need to know, but I thought perhaps some insight into the general mentality of your grandfather-by-some-sort-of-extension might prove of value to you."
Senju Tobirama. Her creator one step removed. The architect of everything she was, from the material of her body to the basic structure of her self. She loathed no being more in all the seven Paths.
It was not an extension of her general self-loathing. Kei was responsible for most of that, and thence in turn the people and events that had made Kei what she was. He was not one of them. No, Senju Tobirama was the man who had created sapient beings, equal to himself in every way, and then condemned them to mayfly lives of slavery followed by erasure. Willing slavery, in fact, so insidious that it denied its victims even the feeble agency of human slaves, who could curse their masters and dream of freedom in the privacy of their heads. How many prototypes had he created and murdered until he found the formula that let him say, "Die for me", and be met with enthusiasm?
Or was that every Kage's dream? To have minions who knew nothing but obedience, who lacked the concept of defiance, whose interests and desires were irrelevant and whose lives were endlessly expendable at the tyrant's whim? No, even the ill-fated Sixth Hokage, Snowflake believed, had not been as inhuman as the Second.
"Snowflake, please be careful. You are crushing the scroll."
Crushing it? She should burn it. Every trace of that man's existence removed would be a blessing on the world.
Snowflake flinched hard. Destroying writing? Destroying information? What was wrong with her?
"Thank you," she told Shikamaru. "I will peruse it when an appropriate opportunity arises."
One day. When she could read it safely. Perhaps a stronger, more mature Snowflake would be able to enter the monster's mind and find some valuable revelation that would help her understand herself. Perhaps.
That left one last gift. Snowflake calmed herself as best she could. It would not do to have her experience of Tenten's present tainted by hatred.
Tenten, as ever, had no preamble to offer. Instead, she handed Snowflake a book, an elegant leather-bound volume thick with many pages… all of which were blank. Only the front cover was decorated, with a silver snowflake on a black background.
Blank pages…
"A diary?" Snowflake asked.
Tenten nodded. "For memories that belong only to you."
Snowflake did not own her memories. They belonged to Kei, returned to her mind at the end of Snowflake's day, and stayed there as real time, human time, passed while Snowflake did not exist. In the morning (hopefully), they were given back to her, on loan—but never to keep, for as a shadow, she had nowhere to keep them.
It had never occurred to her to have a storage medium independent of Kei. Kei had a bias against diary-keeping after abysmal abortive attempts in her youth, which Snowflake had unconsciously inherited. But the notion of having memories defined and recorded by her alone, and untainted by the subtle shifts in cognition that came whenever her mind was updated with Kei's changes… it was surreal. And beyond that…
Snowflake was finite, conditional, temporary. A diary was not. Assuming proper storage, it would outlast human civilisation, perhaps even welcome back the Sage if he did not dawdle. It would be proof of her existence, not as she was seen by others, but as she saw herself.
She would write the first entry tonight. She would describe this party, and then if some disaster happened and she never woke up again, that description would preserve everything that mattered. Her family and their love for her. Her own thoughts and feelings. The exercise of her agency expressed by the very act of writing. The fact that, despite everything, despite all her flaws, despite the twisted nature of humanity and all its workings, despite the awfulness of the world, today Snowflake was happy to be alive.
-o-
This interlude is brought to you now because there was very little to be written in the current plan:
- You already have Mari's response: there are no magic bullets for Akane's situation; just be supportive as best you can
- There continue to be no therapists in the MfDverse, Yamanaka or otherwise; if you want a full Ino scene anyway, please feel free to put it in a new plan
- Your sanity checkers unanimously vetoed trying to get Asuma to give Akane special treatment; things might be different if she were literally unable to perform her duties reliably (OOC, a Moderate or Severe mental Consequence), but as former Jōnin Commander, Asuma would be experienced enough to recognise that's not the case
Special thanks to @RandomOTP for their present ideas. Hazō's present was inspired by @absoluteblack and LWildcard (see the threadmark in Media).
-o-
What do you do?
Voting closes on Saturday 19th of February, 1 p.m. New York time.
Hazō yawned and stretched, then poured himself a cup of tea and offered one to his student. "Morning, Harumitsu. How'd you sleep?"
"Well, s-sir. And I had a moderate b-breakfast and did some l-light stretching and have already d-done the 'Attract and B-Banish the Good and B-Bad Types of Fortune Respectively' dance." Harumitsu accepted the tea with a nod, sipped it once for politeness, and then immediately forgot that it was a beverage and instead started using the cup as a fidget toy for twitching fingers.
Hazō laughed. "Good man. I'm going to take a wild stab and guess that you're excited about working with the Sogabe Slide?" The boy had been very politely pestering asking Hazō about it ever since hearing the term. Yesterday, when Hazō had finally announced that he felt his apprentice was ready, Harumitsu had nearly vibrated himself into the Out.
"The Slide, sir? Oh, were we s-supposed to be working on the Slide today? I had forgotten."
Unfortunately, as his apprentice spoke, a tired Hazō had been right in the middle of gulping his tea. (Hey, you try spending twelve hours a day instructing your paranoid and grouchy sealing teacher in the art of traveling through the Out in order to chat with massive spiders. Plus spend four hours doing boring Clan Head stuff. Plus spend eight hours researching the Air Tunnel seal that Hazō had been thinking about using for purposes of improved high-altitude bombardment as a way to end World War Four. Plus spend three hours working with Shikamaru and Kei on the care, feeding, and completion of the aforementioned World War Four. Plus spend fifteen minutes total shoving food in your face throughout the day so you didn't get hangry enough to bite someone's head off. Plus spend at least a couple hours with each of two girlfriends. Shadow Clone was the Best. Technique. Ever. He couldn't help but wonder how other Clan Heads got everything done when they couldn't be in multiple places at the same time.)
Anyway, Hazō was in the middle of a gulp of tea when Harumitsu made his comment, hence why four hundred ryō of seal-quality paper ended up ruined and suitable only for taking notes on.
"S-s-sorry, s-sensei," the apprentice said nervously.
"S'aright. I need to be better controlled with my tea. Anyway, let's do this. Have a seat."
The two settled down next to the giant chunk of granite that was their worktable. Sealing was done outdoors, always. You wanted as many potential paths of egress as possible in case things went wrong. Given that it was February, Hazō had bent enough to have heavy paper shoji screens put up around them to block the wind, and multiple braziers were burning to keep the area warm. Cold-stiffened fingers were not a survival aid when working with seals.
"Okay, so, the Slide is a mapping between the ink pattern and the infusion practice," Hazō explained. "It's used where there is a low-pressure curved segment in your design. First, you aspect your chakra with your intent, and then..." He went along, laying the practice out the way Kagome-sensei had originally taught it to him, ensuring at every step that Harumitsu was familiar with all the jargon and understood the various mental states and required chakra manipulations.
"Got all that?" he asked at last.
Harumitsu paused, thinking. His fingers twitched slightly as he rehearsed some of the memory-aid gestures Hazō had mentioned, and then he nodded. His nervousness was picking up as they got closer to the actual infusion practice, and at such times he preferred not to speak if it wasn't essential.
"Okay, good. Now, we're working with your namesake seal today. Point to where the Slide will operate."
Harumitsu laid the blank for a Harumitsu's Outstanding World-Saving Seal on the carefully-polished surface of the granite worktop and studied it carefully before placing his finger on one segment.
"Good. Now, the color that the seal emits is going to depend on how much you arfangle the Slide. Infuse one seal and activate it, just so we get a baseline. Do it the way you normally would and don't worry about the arfangling for now."
Harumitsu took a breath, let it out slowly, and placed his finger on the seal...
They're going to be running through a couple dozen or so copies of the seal, so let's do all the rolls up front. Harumitsu has been studying Sealing for 161 days now. I don't know what his talent should be but to keep things easy we'll say he's averaged 3 XP / day based on whatever his talent level is and whatever demands have given him unusual positive or negative learning opportunities. That means he's got 483 XP that have been spent on nothing but seal-related skills. The first 250 XP was spent acquiring the Sealsmith stunt, leaving him with 233 XP. He sank 210 of it to get his Sealing up to 14 and put some of the remaining 23 points into buying his Calligraphy from 15 to 16. All in all, pretty impressive for not even six months work!
Harumitsu's Outstanding World-Saving Seal:
Calligraphy TN: 8
Infusion TN: 8 (Most seals are harder to infuse than draw, but HOWS is an exception)
Yesterday, Harumitsu prepped a stack of blanks for this lesson. He was careful and took his time with each one, spending 10 minutes instead of 5 per blank in order to get +AB on the Calligraphy roll. In his case that gets him +2. Starting with a base of 16+2=18 he will only fail if he rolls a -12.
Yikes! That -12 is going to be an issue! Let's see about the infusion rolls. The failed Calligraphy roll means he autofails that one, but on the others he fails only on a -12.
At player direction, Hazō burns an FP to make a Declaration: He notices that the tuning follows the same order as the rainbow. (This isn't the phrasing the players used in the plan—they said "...that light disperses into when it passes through a Prism"—but I'm not certain Hazō has ever seen a prism. Regardless it comes out the same.)
...which promptly flickered to shining purplish life, smooth and easy.
"Nice one," Hazō said, nodding and ignoring the embarrassed pinking of his apprentice's ears. "Now, think about the arfangling on that infusion. Describe it for me."
"The consistency was moderate syrup, and...um..."
"Take your time. Did you notice the localization?"
"N-n-no, s-sensei. I'm s-s-sorry."
"Don't sweat it. First time I tried, I didn't even remember the consistency. Try it again, this time focus on the arfangling. Still with moderate-syrup consistency, but focus on neutral localization." He chuckled and shook his head. "It's funny...it used to feel very strange to talk about chakra infusion with words like 'consistency' and 'localization', given that they aren't even vaguely related to what's happening. I mean, sure, whoever invented sealing had to choose something and I guess that physical descriptors are no worse than anything else. Still, it's weird."
Harumitsu nodded and then, at Hazō's gesture, placed his finger on the seal, breathed out, and infused it. It flickered to life with the hue of summer grass.
"Very nice. Now, keep the consistency the same but make the localization more celestine."
Harumitsu nodded and did as ordered, but the color of the light remained essentially unchanged. He shook in head in annoyance and did it again without waiting to be told; this time the light was more bluish.
They spent the next two hours working their way through the stack of seals. There was one mishap, a minor one that caused them both to speak in gibberish for a few minutes, but it wore off quickly. Granted, it was a little less clear when it wore off of Harumitsu since his fright and embarrassment had turned his stutter into complete muteness.
"Don't worry about it," Hazō said, smiling and resting a hand on the boy's shoulder. "Sit down, meditate a bit, and drink this." He pulled a pot of peppermint tea (the good peppermint tea, not the great peppermint tea that he was saving in case Hidan ever showed up again) and poured a cup for each of them. "That was nothing. Let me tell you about some of the seal mishaps that I've had during research." He sat down on one of the lawn chairs and stretched his legs out towards the nearest brazier.
"Let's see...well, there was the time when I accidentally created talking porcupine constructs. They started sublimating away after about ten minutes but while they were there they packed themselves tightly around me and chattered non-stop. Half of them were telling dumb jokes, the other half varied between reciting epic poetry, talking in languages I didn't understand, and propositioning me for sex."
"P-propositioning you f-f-f-f-f-or—" Frustrated, Harumitsu gave up and gestured his astonishment.
"I know, right? And of course I said no! Get your mind out of the gutter." He shook his head. "Honestly. Kids these days. No respect for their teachers." He raised a hand at the horrified look on Harumitsu's face. "That was a joke. Relax. Drink your tea."
Harumitsu finally calmed down after fifteen minutes of listening to his teacher's reminisces about falling out of the universe, needing to clean conjured moss off of himself, suddenly finding himself neck-deep in the earth, having to cut away the serpent that was suddenly growing out of his arm, and the distraction caused by three days of hearing everyone's words a fraction of a second ahead of when they actually spoke them. At that point they got back to work.
An hour later, Harumitsu could reliably infuse the seal with whatever color he liked. It was at that point when Hazō frowned.
"Your initial infusion was bluish," he said. "This past group you've been focused on localizing the Slide more towards cthonic than celestine, right?"
"Yes, sir."
"Huh. Have you noticed—" He shook his head. "Hang on, I think I'm going to have to do this for myself."
He picked up one of the blanks and started tracing his finger over it and mumbling to himself.
"S-Sensei?" Harumitsu asked after a minute or two. "What are you doing?"
"Learning this seal," Hazō said, not looking away from his object of study. "I never got around to it, but I want to try something."
Hazō passes the test and rolls above the seal's complexity TN. Every three points of success is one shift. Once the number of shifts equals the complexity of the seal, Hazō will have learned the seal.
Hazō has learned the seal. Easily.
"Got it."
Harumitsu's eyes were wide. "You learned the seal in under five minutes?"
Hazō shrugged with faux modesty. "It's what I do," he growled, dropping his voice into the lowest register he could reach. He scowled, attempting to fit the 'world weary veteran' trope, but only for a moment. Afterwards he shrugged. "It's an easy seal and I am actually pretty good at this." He whipped out his brush and started drawing the seals. "Why don't you keep practicing? You've got the localization working fine, so focus on the consistency this time. Keep it in the 'syrup' band, don't try to go vaporous or earthy yet."
"Yes, s-sensei."
Two hours later, Hazō had a fistful of blanks and was ready to try his experiment.
The first seal, done with no particular attention to arfangling, produced a yellowish light. With a bit of focus he could produce light of whatever color he wanted.
"Check this out," he called, waving Harumitsu over from where he had been drawing a new batch of blanks to practice with.
Harumitsu hurried over and Hazō pointed at the seal. "When I go with a very thin consistency, I get blue light. As I thicken it, the color changes." He infused six more seals quickly and then left them sitting there, glowing happily in all the colors of the rainbow.
"Does that look familiar?" he asked.
Harumitsu frowned. "No, sensei? W-what am I looking for?"
"It's the rainbow," Hazō explained. He moved his finger down the line, tapping each seal in order. "It's repeatable. Thin consistency is blue, and as I thicken it the colors always come out in this order. The same order as the rainbow."
"Okay...?"
Hazō pointed at the rightmost seal that throbbed with a menacing red glow, just like the eye of Saulano, the villain of Jiraiya's Icha Icha Paradise: The Perilous Ring of Matrimony. "What if I thicken it even more?"
"Sensei? It's already red."
"Sure, but I haven't thickened it as much as I could, and I haven't experimented with the celestine/cthonic axis at all. What if I keep going? What do you think it will do?"
"Um...are you suggesting we do research, s-sensei? I thought today was lessons?"
That brought Hazō up a little short. Today was in fact a teaching day for Harumitsu and Hazō. (Well, for Hazō TeacherGuy. Hazō Prime was working with Kagome-sensei on summoning, Hazō SkySmasher was working on the Air Tunnel seals that would hopefully result in the destruction of Hidden Rock, and Hazō Hoorah! (the exclamation point was in fact part of the spelling of his name) was working on the Action Relay Seal that he was hoping would allow seals to be activated at a distance.)
"Well, I suppose. It's only one test and then we'll go back to teaching."
Harumitsu seemed like he wanted to say something, possibly something acidic, but he nodded politely. "We'll do the preparations, right?"
"Of course. Hang on while I go micturate and defecate, as per the Gōketsu Kagome Book of Sealing Instruction, rule number 18."
o-o-o-o
"So?" Ino demanded, leaning forward with wide eyes. "What happened then? Did you break the world?"
The chūnin warrior and the heads of Clans Yamanaka and Gōketsu had been left at home tonight. Tonight was simply Akane, Ino, and Hazō in one of the Yamanaka saunas, lounging together in a big people-pile atop the towel-covered benches. The left side of the tiny room was piled high with rocks that had been recently removed from an intense fire, and a splash of grass-infused water across them filled the room with comforting mugginess and the scent of summer.
Ino was sitting up against the wall with Akane's head in her lap, combing her fingers through the other girl's hair. Hazō was lying with his head on Akane's belly and her hand captured in his as he related the story of his experiments.
"Nah," he said, eyes on the ceiling. "Well...mostly not."
"Hazō, don't tease her," Akane said. Her eyes were closed and the lines of pain and guilt were currently absent from her face. Granted, her face was utterly slack, lacking any trace of happiness or contentment, but at least there wasn't pain or guilt.
"Okay, okay," he said, rolling his head to look over at his ladies and smiling. "Have I told you guys lately that you're both beautiful and I'm suuuuper lucky?"
"You have not," Akane said, her lips momentarily twitching into a smile before going loose again.
"You are both beautiful and I'm super lucky."
"No, no," Ino said. "It was better the first time. Say it properly."
"You're both beautiful and I'm suuuuuuper lucky."
"Thank you, sweetie," she said, reaching over and stroking his forehead for a moment. Hazō purred in contentment at the touch and let his eyes sink closed.
"'Sweetie'?" he asked.
"Yeah, it felt weird as I said it. I'm working on finding something."
"May I suggest 'My Most Darling and Handsome Lord of Inspiration and Wit'?"
Both Akane and Ino snorted. Akane's snort made Hazō's head bounce on her belly, which made him laugh in surprise.
"You may not suggest that," Ino said. "I wouldn't call you that even if you were presenting me with a billion ryō business deal while simultaneously performing the most incredible comedy routine ever performed."
"Hrmph. Just for that, I'm not going to tell you what happened."
"Yes you will," Akane said, not opening her eyes. Ino was rubbing her temples, small circles with just the right pressure to drive off stress.
"I might not."
"You will."
"I—"
"Hazō, hush," Ino scolded. "You will and you know it. You can barely keep yourself from talking about your research even when something exciting hasn't happened."
"Hrmph." Hazō opened his eyes just long enough to shoot her a dirty look, then closed them again and took a deep breath of the deliciously steamy air. He absently ran the back of his hand up Akane's calf.
"All right, fine. Since you asked so nicely, I'll tell you what happened."
"Told you."
"Shush! Anyway, we did all the prep rituals and then I infused the seal, but this time I arfangled it even more than when I set it to red light. Really pushed it hard." He paused and let the words hang in the air.
"Well?" Ino demanded.
His pillow shifted under him, so he opened his eyes and turned his head so that he could meet his sweeties' gazes. Akane's eyes were open and she'd propped herself up a little bit so that she could watch his face expectantly. Ino was still on the 'amused' side of the amused/irritated line but rapidly slipping across it. It was time to reveal.
"No color."
They both frowned. "What are you talking about?" Akane asked.
"It didn't glow at all. Instead, it started getting warm."
Four eyes widened. Ino couldn't help but sputter, "What? I mean...why? Argh, I don't even know what I mean. You and your stupid sealing. Knowing you, you kept testing it. What did you find?"
"Are you kidding? When a seal stops working properly and starts getting hot, you run before the failure hits. I grabbed Harumitsu and Substituted out of there so fast my shadow hasn't caught up yet."
Author's Note: HOWS doesn't produce that much light, so when you tune it to the infrared spectrum it doesn't produce much heat either. The infrared HOWS that Hazō just created wouldn't even be sufficient as a handwarmer, let alone to heat a room.
After Hazō TeacherGuy hauled Harumitsu off the field, he notified Hazō Prime who hurried over and entombed the HOWS in a Multiple Earth Wall box in order to contain whatever sealing failure is about to happen. The box is in the woods a mile north of the Gōketsu estate's northern wall.
I think the timeline on this plan doesn't actually work, since the last update ended in the evening and Akane was supposed to leave in the morning. Of course, I didn't realize that until right now and I'm not going to go back and rewrite it all, so we'll assume that Akane's mission got held up for a day because reasons. It is now the evening, Hazō is asleep, and Akane will be gone when he wakes up. I would probably have given this a higher award without the timeline breakage because I enjoyed writing it a lot.
XP AWARD: 3
Brevity XP: 1
"GM had fun" XP: 4
+2 for scene: seal research + teach Harumitsu
+2 polycule polycuteness
Hazō is asleep and will wake up shortly after dawn.
Vote time! What to do now?
Voting ends on Wednesday, February 23, 2022, at 12pm London time.
Hazō Danger IntoTheUnknown studied the granite box before him. It might hold the apocalypse. It might hold a minor curiosity. It might even hold nothing, although that seemed unlikely.
"You know, if I was a Naruto clone," he mused aloud, "I would probably say something like 'hey, Boss, you know this completely sucks, right?'"
"Good thing you're not," Hazō Prime responded with a smile. "You understand that I'm not making you do this, right? I know you're compelled to follow orders, but I'm not ordering you. If you think it's a bad idea, don't do it."
"Nah. We thought it was a good idea when we made me and I haven't changed our mind just because we made me and not you. Also, we need better pronouns." He tossed one hand in an amused 'what can you do' gesture.
Prime held out one fist and knocked knuckles with his duplicate. "Good luck. Thanks for this."
"Heyyyyy," IntoTheUnkown gave him a cheesy grin and two thumbs up. "If it was easy then they wouldn't need us, right? Besides, 'IntoTheUnknown' is literally my last name."
"And 'Danger' is your middle name, I know," Prime said with a grin. "I was there when you chose it, remember? Also, your family name is still Gōketsu, so 'IntoTheUnknown' is your second middle name." He shook his head. "Honestly, you're such a ham."
IntoTheUnknown laughed. "Just because you're always aware of the social consequences of being a goof and therefore do not allow yourself to indulge, that doesn't mean I can't. Advantages of a doomed existence with the fragility of a soap bubble: whatever goes wrong ain't my problem so I can relax and have fun."
"Right." Prime shook his head in amusement. "Good luck."
"Thanks, bro. Keep the family safe, eh? Uplift forever." He extended his fist once more, and once more Hazō Prime bumped it. "Okay, wall it up."
Prime stepped back, cut four quick handseals, and raised his arms. Granite shot forth from the ground at an angle, merging together at the top to enclose Gōketsu Hazō Danger IntoTheUnknown, his tools, and the granite box that surrounded the maybe-apocalypse.
Locked away from the outside world, IntoTheUnknown took a moment to check around and make sure that there was no light coming into the box through any tiny chinks or cracks. Nope; Prime had done his job properly. Likewise, there was a nice thick layer of granite below him, so whatever came out of the box couldn't simply slip into the dirt.
Good.
He took a Jiraiya's Awesome Daybright Lantern seal out of one pouch, suppressed the resulting twinge of loss, lit the seal up, and affixed it to the north wall with a dab of pitch. Three more went on the other walls so as to make the light as even as possible and the shadows as few. A trio of Tunneler's Friend seals took care of making sure he wouldn't suffocate. (The Hazōllective wasn't sure if it was possible for a Shadow Clone to suffocate and none of them were anxious to do the experiment.)
By the time he was done with that there came a faint tunk, tunk on the wall, signifying that Prime had finished setting up the Five Seal Barrier on the outer walls. Whatever happened in here should be contained. He tapped back to let Prime know that the message was received, then picked up his sledgehammer with a sigh.
Sadly, the universe had finally proven Kagome-sensei wrong about something: explosives could not in fact solve all problems. It would have been nice to simply blast the inner box open, but a regular explosive in this enclosed space would kill the user. Kagome-sensei's directional explosives were also out, since they might cause spalling and lethal ricochets or damage the contents of the box. That was most definitely to be avoided; this situation was already uncertain enough. Instead, he took the seals off the inner box and smashed it with the sledgehammer.
It felt good to swing the hammer. Granted, Hazō Danger IntoTheUnknown wasn't the Hazō who had been spending all his time on frustrating paperwork, and frustrating summoning teaching, and worrying about the war effort, and and and..., but he remembered being the one doing all those things. Having a nice, simple problem that could be solved by smashing it with a big hammer like a caveman? Oorah.
Granted, it was going to take a lot of cavemanning (was that a word? whatever, it was now) to get into this box. When the HOWS seal had started failing, Hazō Prime had MEWed it up in a foot-thick layer of granite, slapped a Five Seal Barrier on it, and left it well enough alone. The box had been sitting here three days and nothing had gone wrong yet; Kagome-sensei, Hazō Prime, and Hazō ThirdOpinionAndTiedVoteBreaker had decided (surprisingly, unanimously) that at this point it made more sense to inspect the contents of the box and see what needed to be done, if anything.
IntoTheUnknown had only a sliver of chakra, as Noburi had drained him nearly dry before they started. The Hazōllective had decided that it would be better for him not to have too much, as it was wildly unlikely that it would let him do anything useful and being almost out would prevent any unlikely scenarios such as the failure taking over his barely-corporeal body and using his skills to escape containment. As a result of this lack, IntoTheUnknown could not chakra boost and was forced to smash through the foot-thick granite with nothing but raw muscle power. Honestly, it felt better to do it this way, and he found himself grateful that it was necessary. He undoubtedly would have boosted if he could have, simply through force of habit, and in the process he would have robbed himself of the pleasing experience of doing a job using muscles that he had earned through years of training as opposed to simply magic that he happened to have as a fortunate stroke of his birth.
He smiled to himself, knowing that Prime would remember that thought when they reunited. Perhaps he would take time out in the future to do a job the hard way simply to feel what it was like.
It took a few swings of the hammer to break a big enough crack in the granite box that surrounded the maybe-failing, maybe-failed, maybe-perfectly-safe-but-how-likely-is-that seal. Once he had that, IntoTheUnknown wedged a spike into the gap and slammed it in until it broke through. Fifteen more minutes of work and he had a large enough hole that he could point an Usamatsu's Glorious Life-Saving Purifier in to suck up any poison gases that might be emerging. He gave that a minute or so, then used a Jiraiya's Awesome Daybright Lantern seal, a mirror, and a lot of careful fumbling to look inside. After all, no reason to stick your face where a horrific Out-escapee could leap out and grab you.
Inside the box was nothing surprising. The non-glowing HOWS seal and a bunch of empty space.
Hazō Danger IntoTheUnknown frowned at that. He set his tools aside, left the Purifier pointed into the hole just in case, and sat down to think and drink some hot chocolate. (Sure, he had memories of drinking hot chocolate from back when he was Hazō Prime, but that didn't mean he couldn't experience it directly.)
After a few minutes of fruitlessly spinning his mental wheels he stood up and very carefully extended his pinky into the box. When it failed to melt, explode, or get infested with invisible monsters, he cautiously stuck his hand in. When that too failed to liquify, attract the attention of Outer monstrosities and/or Jashin, teleport him into a caldera, or cause one or more laws of physics to reverse themselves in painful fashion, he hesitantly touched the seal.
It was warm. Not hot, just warm. Comfortably so, in fact. It would have felt quite nice tucked into gloves or boots but it wasn't enough to be felt from more than a few inches away.
He couldn't stop himself from cringing at the unavoidable images of what might happen, but he forced himself to leave his hand in contact with the seal for a slow count of 100. Only then did he pull the seal out of its granite container, taking great pains not to fold it or scrape it against the edges of the hole. The seal continued being unthreateningly warm. It didn't get hotter, it didn't get colder, and it didn't try to eat his face or cuddle him. Just a nice, steady output of comfortable heat.
A chill rippled down his back. The seal had failed—obviously, since it was supposed to be emitting light and not heat—but it had failed in a useful way. That...was wild. Sure, there was no reason that seal failures had to be harmful, but there were a lot more ways to be harmful than helpful. Apparently, Hazō had rolled triple sixes fifty times in succession without using the Iron Nerve. Between this and the results of his earlier importuning of Jashin...well, the existence of a sorta-beneficent deity was starting to look more plausible.
"If anyone relevant is listening, and you took any action to help with this, thank you very much," he whispered.
He thought for another minute, trying to see what value he could still extract from this situation. Nothing came to mind, except perhaps for the obvious inspiration: Intentionally reproducing a seal failure was (as per Kagome-sensei) "set-your-face-on-fire stupid", but intentionally researching a seal that produced heat...well, that was a different story. Forget putting it in your gloves and boots during the winter, what if the citizens of Leaf could use it to heat their houses? Or Leaf ninja could use it as a campfire in the woods so that they didn't have to risk a fire that could be seen by the enemy?
Well, actually, heating Leaf's civilian houses with such a seal would put the firewood vendors out of business and bring the wrath of the Merchant Council down upon the Gōketsu. Also, there was probably some reason why using it in the field was a bad idea. He couldn't think of one but most off-the-cuff ideas turned out to have issues that needed fixing before deployment. Regardless, it would be useful once Kei had helped spot and resolve issues.
With a satisfied smile, he set the miraculously failed-safe seal on the granite floor and dispelled himself. Prime was going to be amazed.
Author's Notes: The plan for this update was predicated on being able to have multiple Shadow Clones each researching a separate project. Unfortunately, when I started writing this I noticed that the QMs had made a mistake in the Summoning Scroll Acolyte stunt. It provides an enormous boost in Hazō's ability to do sealing research, but at the expense of giving him a Mild mental Consequence that takes a couple days to heal. Unfortunately, when the QMs wrote the stunt we brainoed and wrote 'Physical' instead of 'Mental'. Shadow Clones pass mental but not physical Consequences back to their Prime, meaning that this correction puts the kibosh on being able to ignore the downside of SSA while multithreading your research. Because of the error we called a mulligan on the plan; the specified amount of time passed but the players are voting on what research, if any, they want to have happened during this period. Once they decide, we might simply announce the results of that research OOC or I might write another scene or two describing the outcome. We'll see.
Anyway, if you happened to click through the link in the title to see the plan and you're wondering why the update didn't address any of it, that's why.
This update covered 6 days. If research happened then that time represents 5 days for research prep, and 1 day for actually producing the seal aka making the research roll. If no research happened then this was simply a timeskip.
XP AWARD: 30
Brevity XP: 6
"GM had fun" XP: 10
It is now 9pm and the family is gathered for dinner.
Vote time! What to do now?
Voting ends on Saturday, February 26, 2022, at 12pm London time.
"No! Damnit, no! You put the central seal on the strand! You need to place the support seals on the loops, not on the strand!" the twiggy fleshbeast shouted.
Fleshbeast so fussy. Drone #549,571 put papers on strands. Drone #549,571 do good thing, just like QueenMotherBelovedGoddess ordered when QueenMotherBelovedGoddess send Drone #549,571 and squadron to ArachnidAllies. Put papers on strands like ordered!
Drone #549,571 turned away and pointedly buzzed off to tidy up the stack of papers that would be put on the strands. Things were much better when they were tidy. Stupid fussy fleshbeast. Icky. Stupid and icky.
"Look," the fleshbeast said, audibly gathering its patience, "this is important. The way the Five Barrier Seal works is that the central seal goes on an object and the four support seals get arranged around it in a planar circle. The support seals can't be on the same object as the central seal or the seal won't work."
The stupid fleshbeast was still yapping.
"We need the seal to be active because it generates a protective effect over the object that the central seal is on," the fleshbeast continued. "It renders it immobile and indestructible, so when one of the Dragons flies into it, the Dragon will be injured. That means we need you to put the central seal on one strand and each of the support seals needs to go on the skytower outrigger platforms." The fleshbeast paused, studying Drone #549,571 closely. "Kumokōgō told me that you guys are smart. You understand me, right?"
Drone #549,571 buzzed. It was an annoyed and grumpy buzz, but it was a buzz of acknowledgement. Yes, Drone #549,571 could understand the stupid, fussy, icky, squidgy fleshbeast and its stupid, fussy, icky fleshbeat yappings. It wanted Drone #549,571 to put seals on strands. Drone #549,571 did put seals on strands!
The fleshbeast watched Drone #549,571 tidy the pile of papers for a moment and then sighed. "You know, when I was dealing with the Cats I was at least sure that they understood me," it grumbled quietly but not quietly enough that Drone #549,571 couldn't hear it. "Come with me, okay?"
Hrmph. Drone #549,571 wondered if QueenMotherBelovedGoddess knew just how much trouble this assignment would be. Had Drone #549,571 been a bad drone? Was QueenMotherBelovedGoddess angry with Drone #549,571 and that was why She ordered Drone #549,571 to come work with dumb fussy icky gross squidgy fleshbeasts and ArachnidAllies? Drone #549,571 didn't mind ArachnidAllies—despite their inferior eyes they at least had the decency to cover up their squidgy bits with proper chitin! This fleshbeast...*shudder*. It was just so...so...so gross! It made Drone #549,571's stinger muscles shrink just looking at the thing! Any minute now and it would probably start oozing, or sliming, or something equally disgusting.
"Come on," the fleshbeast repeated, waving one of its forelimbs. "We need to talk to the spinners, and then find Kumokōgō. Maybe she can clarify things."
With a purely mental sigh, Drone #549,571 followed the fleshbeast over to where the ArachnidAlly spinners were working.
"How's it going?" the fleshbeast asked. "How are you?"
The ArachnidAlly the fleshbeast was speaking to was small, only twice the size of Drone #549,571. It was a pleasing brown with glimmers of green speckling. It was also trembling with exhaustion as the delicate silk flowed from its sleek spinnerets.
"Well do I, Summoner. Thank you question for."
The fleshbeast nodded. "How is the silk doing?"
"Well does. Over a mile it is. Thin but strong, clean and free burrs of. Dragline all. Strong, but matte wrapping to gleaming prevent."
"Thank you," the fleshbeast said. "That's going to be important." It nodded and turned to walk to the next spinner.
Stupid fleshbeast. Rude fleshbeast. Couldn't see how exhausted spinner was? A mile of dragline? How many days had spinner been crouched here, doing nothing but spinning? How much food had it choked down, stuffing itself beyond gluttony so it would have the strength and the material to keep spinning? Rude, rude fleshbeast.
Drone #549,571 followed the fleshbeast past the other spinners, studying the enormous amount of silk that had already been accumulated and placed in beautifully tidy coils because ArachnidAllies were decent, hardworking people with the decency to cover their squidgy bits and keep their things neat. Finally, after reviewing all of it, the fleshbeast led Drone #549,571 over to the pile of silk left from the previous rehearsal.
"This," the fleshbeast said, picking up the coil formed by the hugely long strand of silk, "is the first line." The line was so thin that the fleshbeast could likely not even see it, because it had to pick up the whole coil. "You need to attach it to skytower number one, then place the central seal on it. Do it here, on the model." The fleshbeast gestured to the platform wire that was hanging two yards off the ground.
This particular skytower was a thin metal wire that had been bent around itself to form a circle with a strand of wire across the diameter. Other bits of wire had been bent around spots on the perimeter, making horizontal platforms that extended a few inches from the body of the loop. A piece of paper had been wrapped around the center of the diameter, and four other papers were emplaced on four of the loops that stuck out from the perimeter. Another skytower hovered below it at fleshbeast-ankle height and another pair was positioned a few yards to one side. "Show me."
Drone #549,571 glared at the stupid, rude, squidgy, pale, maggot-like fleshbeast, but it took the coil of silk, sorted through it with nimble forelegs until it found the end, and tied it next to the paper that wrapped the diameter-wire of the skytower.
"Good. Now put the main seal on it. Be careful not to break it."
Stupid fleshbeast. How stupid did it think Drone #549,571 was?
With a mental sigh, Drone #549,571 pressed the appropriate piece of paper over where the silk was looped around the wire. It pressed firmly, making sure that it was in contact with the silk, then folded the seal down and around so that the pitch along the edges came together and glued the whole thing in place.
"Great job. Now, put the support seals on."
The sigh had progressed to barely-audible grumbles, but Drone #549,571 placed another of the pieces of—
"No!" the fleshbeast shouted. "That's a support seal! You can't put it on the main strand! It goes on the outriggers of the loop!"
Drone #549,571's muscles clenched, its stinger curling up and under in ready position. No. No, QueenMotherBelovedGoddess had said that Drone #549,571 was to obey ArachnidAlliesEmpress as if she were QueenMotherBelovedGoddess. ArachnidAlliesEmpress had ordered Drone #549,571 to do what the disgusting, rude, unpleasant fleshbeast said. The fleshbeast had not explicitly said that Drone #549,571 should not sting it to death, but that was probably safe to assume. Still...
"Hazō," said ArachnidAlliesEmpress, walking up from the bottom of the trap tunnel, "go let it. What asking you are beyond is the drone's comprehension." She turned to Drone #549,571. "Come, little one. New plan there is. Woven the nets we have for you. You and your brethren aloft the nets will carry, along a mite rider with. You are comfortable a mite carrying?"
Drone #549,571 buzzed happily. The mites were nice. Their little legs gave good scritches.
"In perfect formation will you need to fly," ArachnidAlliesEmpress said. "If not, tear you will the net. Keep your spacing you must, and hover long enough next to the skytower for mite rider to join net to skytower and the seals turn on. Fortunately, very good at flying together and hovering you and the other Hornets are."
Drone #549,571 buzzed happily. ArachnidAlliesEmpress said Drone #549,571 was very good at flying!
"Come," ArachnidAlliesEmpress said, waving with one foreleg. "Summon your hivebrothers. The net is this way." She beckoned the fleshbeast to follow as well.
o-o-o-o
"How did you get all the skytowers up there to anchor the net?" Hazō asked.
"Only one skytower needed was. Same as the net with. A team of hornets bore them aloft, their mite riders activated the seals."
"Impressive. Can all of the Arachnids use seals now?" His voice was distracted; off in the distance the Hornet squadron was aloft, flying in rigid formation towards the butte atop which the Dragons laired. The formation wasn't needed for this part, but apparently they found it comforting. Given what was about to happen to them—what they knew was about to happen to them—they deserved all the comforting they could get. Honestly, it was a little terrifying how willing they were to die. When he had hesitantly pointed out the issue to one of the drones it had looked at him as though he was the smallest, stupidest little grubworm to ever crawl out of a diseased body. "Not for safety of your QueenMotherBelovedGoddess you would happily die in glory? Scum."
"No. It has proven to be challenging. Myself and a few dozen others, nearly all of whom were involved in setting up this trap." Her legs rippled, a soft tack-tack-tack-tack that Hazō was pretty sure implied nervousness.
"Don't worry," Hazō said. "It's going to be amazing. The hornets bait one of the Dragons off the butte and lead it through the net. The strands are indestructible, the Dragon isn't." Hopefully. "It should—it will be sectioned up like a radish flower from Moritaki's."
She cocked her head slightly towards him. It was a thing she had started doing to let him know that she was looking at him, since the arrangement of her eyes meant that it was hard to tell where she was focused. "A radish flower?"
"Yeah, Moritaki's is this very high-end restaurant. As a garnish for their meals, they take a radish and they make neat slices in it, not all the way through, and then they peel the edges back so it looks like a flower. It's quite pretty."
"Interesting. Perhaps try it I will. Not with gross plant thing, though. Spiders not gross plant things eat."
"Where is the net again?" Hazō asked, not rising to the bait. Without waiting for a response he checked the sighting device that had been set up to answer exactly that question. It was a pair of forked sticks stuck in the ground; if you positioned your head such that the two forks lined up then you would be looking exactly where the net hung in the air. The net was invisible at any distance, the strands that made it up far finer than a human hair and carefully spun so as not to gleam the way most spider silk did.
"You made them like we discussed?" he asked. Finally, his brain clicked on something from before. "Hang on, wait. Only one skytower was needed? How—"
"Yes, Hazō, one only. Three hundred feet on a side net is, every twenty feet with strands vertically and horizontally." She raised a foreleg. "I know, original suggestion was six hundred feet and circular, but this simpler proved. That way a skytower at center would needed have, with strands radiating outwards and on each one a seal, since so careful you were to emphasize, over and over and over, that only protect a single object your Five Seal Barrier would." She chittered her amusement.
Okay, maybe Hazō had been a little repetitive, but redundantly repeating critical information was good, right? Sure, and you could say that again.
"That way it doing many skytowers required would have, for anchor points, and in the center one. If a skytower the Dragon noticed, break off it might before the net it passed through, or flame breath it might have used to destroy the net." She swung her cephalothorax back and forth in a mimicry of Hazō's own regretful head-shake. "Tsk, tsk. Invulnerable to push but not fire to? Flaw in your seal most basic. Significant oversight. Should get on that." She waved towards the sighting sticks. "Instead, a single long strand we used, woven back and forth on itself. A single thing, meaning only one skytower needed was, to anchor a corner while the Hornets held the other three corners spread out." She chittered in frustration. "Difficult it was. Strong our silk is, and light, but a net that huge still easily breaks, or tangles on itself. Four tries took it before success. Still, better this way was. No tower in center where Dragons sightline it would be in, and no other towers to the eye catch. Much harder to see."
"That...makes perfect sense." He looked off into the distance, where the Hornet squadron were barely-visible dots. He caught himself shifting from foot to foot nervously and forced himself to stop. It was important to look calm at moments like this. "You set up the Force Walls at all the retreat tunnels?"
"Of course. If skyslicer plan fails, bait hornets will flee to ground, hopefully escape to. Not bloody about that am I."
"Not...did you mean 'not sanguine'?"
"Sanguine bloody means, no?"
"It does, but it also means 'calm' or 'confident'." Far off in the distance, all but a handful of the hornets were diving at the Dragons. The bait hornets waited at a distance, hovering low enough that they couldn't see the top of the butte and the Great Seal that crouched there.
A RO4R 5pl!7 the a!r, s!@shing @ H#zō's b.ain even fr.m miles away.
"It begins," Kumokōgō noted. "All right you are?"
Hazō was bent over, hands on his knees, breathing deeply and focusing on keeping his lunch down. "I'll be fine," he said, waving one hand. "I just need...ugh...need a second." Several deep lungfuls of air had him back to normal and he straightened up.
o-o-o-o
Drone #374,281 trembled in joy. Drone #549,571 had chosen it to be bait for the Dragons, because Drone #374,281 was the fastest flyer in the squadron! Drone #549,571 was squadron leader and had chosen Drone #374,281 to flee before the horrifying monster after the rest of the squadron-element died futilely stinging at its invulnerable scales in order to bait it aloft! Drone #374,281 was so lucky to die gloriously, protecting far-off Hive and QueenMotherBelovedGoddess! It wondered which Dragon would chase it down and eat it? The other squadron elements were each standing by to bait a separate Dragon. There was no way to know which one would come ravening after Drone #374,281 but Drone #374,281 was sure it would be the biggest and fastest! Drone #374,281 would lead it away and hivebrothers would be a little safer, dealing only with the smaller and slower ones.
o-o-o-o
Drone #731,894 held still as Drone #421,338's stinger stabbed it quickly in the left eye and then the right before scooping them both away. Yes, the pain was huge, but it was all part and parcel of protecting far-off Hive and QueenMotherBelovedGoddess. Drone #731,894 could not be allowed to see the Great Seal atop which the Dragons laired, so removing Drone #731,894's eyes was the only option. The stupid fleshbeast had wanted to offer blindfolds, but those didn't hold reliably around unlidded compound eyes, and there was the possibility that they might slip and let Drone #731,894 see the Seal. Couldn't have that.
It was done, and Drone #421,338 stroked Drone #731,894's back in apology and comfort at the necessity. Drone #731,894 buzzed back its happy acceptance and nudged its hivebrother. For glory and the protection of Hive and QueenMotherBelovedGoddess!
The signal came and Drone #731,894 dove, following the flight path that it had been assigned. There was no being sure where exactly the Dragons were atop the butte, but it wasn't that big and the Dragons were. Missing would likely be harder than hitting.
It went the assigned distance and then let loose from bladder and bowels, buzzing the strongest taunts it could think of: "Bad worker! Bad worker, shames QueenMotherBelovedGoddess! Doesn't help hivebrothers! Bad worker!" Hundreds of mites, shrunk to their smallest size, leaped from Drone #731,894's back and expanded. They had been blinded, just like the Hornets, but hopefully some of them would land on a Dragon's eyes or nose and get inside to do their work.
There was a ROAR, and a snap of massive jaws, and Drone #731,894 died in glory, protecting Drone #731,894's Hive and QueenMotherBelovedGoddess.
o-o-o-o
Drone #374,281 stopped breathing for just a moment as the rest of its squadron element went over the butte and died. It wished it could see them as they went, know the exact nature of their glory, but that would have meant Drone #374,281 might see the Seal and that would defeat the entire purpose of their sacrifice.
The sky split with the crack! of massive wings unfurling as the Dragons leapt into the air and roared again.
Eep!
"Bad worker!" Drone #374,281 buzzed at the behemoths. "Slow! Lazy! Can't do its share!" It flew away as fast as it could, shaking its abdomen in insult.
All around the butte, the other bait drones followed suit, using hurtful words and insulting body language to enrage the eldritch monsters of legend. Hopefully it would be sufficient, because this was not going to work unless the eldritch monsters of legend went for it.
The eldritch monsters of legend absolutely went for it. Fire wooshed past Drone #374,281's back as it jinked and spun, flying the most erratic course it could.
"Ha! Slow and stupid worker!" Drone #374,281 shouted back. Hm. Was that a hesitance in the Dragon's wingbeats, a lack of determination? It was hard to tell, since the Dragons' wings were nothing like proper Hornet wings. Still, couldn't have the monster give up and not chase Drone #374,281. Time to go hard!
"Doesn't obey QueenMotherBelovedGoddess!" it buzzed as loud as it could. It fired off the stinkiest, most insulting pheromone blast it could manage. In preparation for this mission, Drone #374,281 had been eating lots of the fleshbeast's 'garlic' and 'onions'. They were nasty, and they did horrible things to the Hornet's digestive system, which meant that there was a very large, very satisfying thhbbbbwat! Oh, that felt so much better! Drone #374,281 had been holding that in for an hour!
A wave of wind pressure trembled on the hairs of its abdomen; Drone #374,281 folded its wings and plummeted as the Dragon's jaws shot through where Drone #374,281 had been an instant earlier. The monsters' massive claws slashed, tips so sharp they gleamed as they missed Drone #374,281 by a whisker.
"Hah! Clumsy drone!"
Drone #374,281 snapped its wings out and looped upwards hard, pumping for altitude. The Dragon's body was above, already coiling back around for another pass. Drone #374,281 tracked along its scaled belly, so close that Drone #374,281 could feel the furnace heat pouring off the monster's scales. Those scales were huge, each one wider than Drone #374,281 was long, with serrated edges that would tear up anything they scraped against. The slightest touch would have ripped Drone #374,281 apart, but Drone #374,281 didn't care! It was flying, fast and faster, leading an enemy of Hive and QueenMotherBelovedGoddess to its doom! This was what Drone #374,281 had been hatched for, why QueenMotherBelovedGoddess had bestowed upon Drone #374,281 such speed and grace!
The Dragon was coiling tighter, its body rising up in front of Drone #374,281, but it was too slow! Drone #374,281 shot past it and into the free air as the Dragon finished turning down, looking in the wrong direction. Oh, to have another thwbat available! It had to settle for peeing on the monster instead.
"Lazy, slow, useless worker who doesn't obey QueenMotherBelovedGoddess!" Drone #374,281 buzzed. It didn't know if the Dragon could understand the words, but it apparently got the gist. The beast roared again, the power of the not-merely-sound tearing at Drone #374,281's soul and making it stumble in midair, its wings tangling as they hadn't since it was an infant. Drone #374,281 tumbled a dozen yards before it shook the spiritual impact aside and got itself straightened out.
The Dragon was fast. Ridiculously fast. Far faster than Drone #374,281, which was embarrassing. It was also huge, meaning that it couldn't turn as tightly as Drone #374,281. That was very good, because it was the only thing keeping Drone #374,281 alive right now. Drone #374,281 flew a weaving, jinking, ridiculous path that would have gotten it a scolding for inefficiency back home but now was the epitome of efficient. Bursts of flame shot by twice, coming so close that Drone #374,281's legs were charred just from the heat of the air around the fire. It gritted its mandibles and kept flying. It didn't need legs, it only needed wings. This looping, unpredictable course had enormously multiplied the necessary distance but they were almost there. The skyslicer net was just ahead, and more elements of the squadron were waiting there, ready to take over baiting the monster if Drone #374,281 died too early. It wouldn't! It would bait the monster all by itself, for Hive and QueenMotherBelovedGoddess!
o-o-o-o
Far below and miles away, Hazō watched tensely as the bait hornet led the Dragon into the skyslicer. Hazō kept his eyes firmly ahead of the aerial dance the two were locked in, carefully not letting himself look directly at the Dragon. Even at this distance, even with the monster only in his peripheral vision, his head was about to split and it was all he could do not to vomit. They were so close! The backup hornets were hovering a mile above and in front of the Dragon's current position, and the net had to be right about...there, barely fifty yards in front of it.
He held his breath, hoping. There were so many things that could go wrong right now. The Dragon could give up the chase and go home. The hornet could accidentally fly through one of the strands of the net, killing itself and giving the game away. (The chances were tiny since the gaps in the mesh were fully twenty feet wide and high, but the strands were so fine they were invisible, meaning it was a possibility.) Or, alternatively, the Dragon might breathe—
Hellfire gouted forth from the Dragon's mouth. It caught the bait hornet square on and when the flames cleared there was nothing, not even ash. An instant later, the Dragon swept through where the net had been, unharmed.
"Shit!" Hazō muttered, punching a fist into his opposite hand. So close! They had been so close!
The backup hornets dove, running for cover before the Dragon could loop up and get them. They dropped all around it, in front of it, and on all sides. It snapped three of them out of the air with one bite of massive jaws. (Hazō didn't l0k aw.y qVi7e in tim3 but manag3d to hold it together.) Its claws slashed out, shredding two more, but the remaining six were headed down, aiming for one of the prepared bunkers on the ground two miles below. If they could get into the escape tunnel they could collapse it behind them and skitter away, but the Dragon was in pursuit and it was faster, moving like a—
The Dragon exploded in midair. Strips of meat, peeled apart like a radish flower, fell out of the smoke and fire.
Hazō blinked in shock. He looked at Kumokōgō. "What just...?"
"Silly Summoner. Think you only one skyslicer we would use?"
Author's Notes: In the previous update, Hazō retroactively decided to work on the Light Relay seal. His clones spent 5 days doing prep work (giving him a +10 bonus) and on the 6th day Hazō rolled +9 for his research on Light Relay; he ended up working late into the night and completed the seal just before needing to fall into bed and sleep the sleep of the deserving hero.
In this update, the Dragon ran into one of the secondary skyslicers. The Dragon was built in the style of a classic Eastern dragon, long and lean with a leonine head, a snake body, and four clawed limbs. It was also forty feet wide and about three hundred feet long. Imagine something like that running into a cheesegrater at a slight angle. The top of its head and portions of its neck were completely separated from the rest of the body. Its shoulders and torso were carved open back about sixty feet before it detonated. The flame destroyed the skyslicer but the Dragon was already well past dead.
Kumokōgō insisted on waiting a full day before going anywhere near the corpse, just in case the other Dragons came to investigate. Hazō grumbled about this, but he agreed and went home to deal with other things, promising to come back midafternoon tomorrow to see what remained. It was good that they did it this way, because the other Dragons did in fact show up. They landed around the corpse of their murdered counterpart, spent several hours studying what had happened to it, and then burned the body to ash before returning to the butte. They were thorough, but enough pieces had flown clear that they missed a few. The Arachnids managed to recover five scales, one tooth, and parts of three claws. The longest of those is four feet long and curved like a sickle. The other two are fragments peeled away from the claw itself, the first one twelve inches long and the second nine inches. The largest of the scales is taller than Hazō, four inches thick, and the bottom edge is a razor-sharp serrated nightmare. The other scales are smaller, ranging in size from two feet across to the size of Hazō's palm.
All of the body parts shimmer with an oily iridescence that makes Hazō very uncomfortable and his vision slightly blurry if he looks directly at them. He refused to put them in storage seals, but they were light enough that he was able to simply wrap them up in some heavy tarps and carry them back to Gōketsu Sealing Research Facility #6. Interdimensional transport is effectively instantaneous, but the tarps were partially eaten away by the time Hazō arrived on the Human Path. He dropped them and backed away fast, watching as the heavy canvas blackened and dissolved as though someone had poured acid on it.
XP AWARD: 3 Most of this plan focused on things that didn't make any sense to me. You were setting up ambushes on the ground? Were the skyslicers supposed to be down there? I couldn't figure out what you were doing so I mostly went off and did my own thing.
+25 for the Humanity, Fuck Yeah! moment of watching Hazō's invention peel a Dragon open
FP Award: 2
This update covered a day and a half. It is now 4pm and you're standing in the middle of GSRF #6 with a pile of Dragon body parts on the dirt in front of you.
Vote time! What to do now?
Voting ends on Wednesday, March 2, 2022, at 12pm London time.
He should have known. He'd been warned that there was a timer counting down to this day. If he'd only deployed the skyslicers a week ago, no, even yesterday, he'd have been a hero. Asuma would have taken one look at his trophies and thrown a banquet to celebrate the rise of a new legend and the inevitable salvation of the Seven Paths.
Instead, while he'd been wrestling with tarps and plotting his triumphant return, the last grains of sand had fallen. He could see the shape of the future as he gazed across the Clan Council table, and it was defeat, followed by a plunge into the unknown.
Today should have been a celebration of Hazō the visionary, sealmaster, and summoner. But as Hazō watched Ami hand out copies of her report, he knew it was not to be. Ami was about to announce that she had single-handedly infiltrated Hidden Rock, founded her latest initialism organisation, had it help her free Hidan from his imprisonment, and persuaded him to give her the Tsuchikage's head on a plate in return. He could see it now. Today would go down in history as Ami Saves Leaf Somehow Day, and a footnote in Yumehara's next volume would mention that also Hazō killed a Dragon or something, but nobody was really paying attention.
Then Hazō looked down at the report, titled "Alliance for Military Integration and Tournaments for Youth", and concluded that even his initial idea had been too optimistic (and also too sane).
Ami was tired enough that it was just barely visible, and still in social spec travel wear (Hazō recognised Mari's teachings: basic camouflage colours in order to hide from chakra beasts, perfectly tailored to one's figure in order to impress/seduce an enemy patrol in an emergency). As she leaned over the table to hand Lady Inuzuka the last copy of the report, she tilted her head sideways to give the Hokage, himself in his usual mid-paperwork state, a questioning look.
In Mist, it would have been shocking to see the Mizukage show any human weakness. Yagura had never been less than perfect, by the definition of perfection he'd taught his people. Aunt Ren had the Iron Nerve poker face. The Sixth was too new for Hazō to have any way of knowing. But in Leaf, Akane had once explained to him, things were different. The Hokage was allowed, no, expected, to look slightly weary on occasion—it was proof that he was working himself to the bone for the village—and at the same time, to always project an aura of strength and iron resolve that was only accentuated by the contrast.
Today, Sarutobi Asuma was more than slightly weary. Hazō suspected that the stamina of youth wasn't quite enough to make up for the far greater headaches that the Seventh had inherited in the post-Nagi Island, post-Great Collapse world, Hazō-caused ones not least among them. However, above the dark circles of yet another all-nighter, there was a rare twinkle in the Hokage's eyes. The smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth was the same smile Hazō had seen in the aftermath of the Competition, when the Hokage had challenged Leaf to give its best, and Leaf had surpassed his expectations. The Hokage was smug. Hazō allowed himself to hope that Ami's mission had been the "defeat a shared enemy and bring Leaf a new summoning scroll" kind of mission and not the "incidentally topple a Kage while on her way to deliver a message" kind.
Receiving a nod, Ami addressed the Clan Council.
"Honoured clan heads of Leaf, I have just returned from organising the next Chūnin Exams."
Hinata was the first to speak into the dramatic silence.
"I'm not sure how that's possible," she said. "We skipped last year's exams because the geopolitical situation was as tense as a drawn bowstring. This year, the arrow's been let loose. There's no precedent for Chūnin Exams during a period of active warfare."
"This would require an armistice with our enemies," Shikamaru added. "I was given to understand that the option was not currently on the table."
Hazō wondered if that meant Shikamaru had recommended it to the Hokage and been refused. He had mixed feelings. On the one hand, death was tragic and peace was a prerequisite for Uplift, as well as its final goal. Hazō was not a warmonger. On the other hand… Rock had to pay. After the unprovoked disaster of the Great Collapse that had cost Ino, Shikamaru, and countless others their families, followed by another unprovoked invasion that was costing Leaf lives even as he sat here, Rock didn't just need to be whittled down until continuing the war became too expensive. It needed to cease to exist as a major shinobi power, like Sand had but worse (Sand would recover in time, Shikamaru had told him; unlike Leaf, they had lost none of the institutional knowledge needed to turn their next crop of elite chūnin into formidable jōnin). It could never again be allowed to threaten Hazō's loved ones or the Fire Country, the cradle of Uplift.
"These aren't exactly ordinary Chūnin Exams," Ami said, "and they're not going to be based on the usual armistice.
"You can find the key points in my report, but as you have generously assembled here in person, with Lord Hokage's permission, please allow me to give you my own background context as well. Before I left Mist, Lord Sixth mentioned to me that he had been reading the Fourth's private notes. Apparently, behind the superhuman tyrant we all knew lay some very human preoccupations. Yagura obsessed over whether he was doing everything he could to protect the things most precious to him—the village and its ideal future which was constantly under threat from human weakness—and every time he felt he wasn't, it was time for new laws or new purges.
"I suspect it's a question every Kage asks themselves, and I found myself asking it as well. Was I doing everything I could to protect the things most precious to me?
"It was instantly obvious that I wasn't. Nothing is 'protected' while there's a war going on. I had to consider my options. Wiping Hidden Rock off the face of the earth was a simple, appealing solution"—several people, including the Hokage, gave wry nods—"but would have come with all sorts of fallout, and also lay outside my skillset. At the other extreme, brokering peace would fall neatly within my training, but it wouldn't have solved the essential problem. My precursors helped broker peace after the last war, and all it did was buy us time until the next one. It is the very nature of geopolitics that a significant power imbalance inevitably leads to war.
"In other words, I had to change the very nature of geopolitics."
Ami smiled.
More than a few people in the room shifted uncomfortably in their seats as the architect of the greatest threat to their power as a class in the village's history promised a new change, and this time with the Hokage's backing.
Hazō didn't shift uncomfortably in his seat; something like this had always been a foregone conclusion. That banquet felt further off with every second.
"Unlike his predecessors, Lord Sixth believes from the heart in the virtues of peace and cooperation. With his seal stamped on my proposal, I travelled immediately to Leaf, our ally and a village whose love of peace I've learned well during my time here. Lord Hokage also approved the proposal, though not without some hard bargaining over details which will probably stay in my nightmares."
A few of the clan heads smirked.
"From there, Lord Hokage sent messengers to Sand and Isan to secure their approval while I headed north. If I thought negotiating with Lord Hokage was hard… let's just say the Shogun and the Grandmaster have the best good magistrate/evil magistrate routine I've seen in my life. Either that, or Grandmaster F hates me with a fiery passion. Definitely the most harrowing part of this entire endeavour. Still, with those four villages on board, and bearing in mind what the alternative would've been for Cloud, I eventually managed to make it work. Then, with all of that momentum, I went on to Waterfall, then with Waterfall's approval to Grass, and then those two agreed to send messengers to the rest of the minors, and now I'm finally back."
"Yes," Lord Hagoromo interjected, "I'm sure we're very impressed with your hard work. However, some of us have actual demands on our time. Could you please just tell us what all this politicking was in aid of?"
"Lord Hagoromo," the Hokage said mildly, "both you and she are here on my invitation. But if you have better things to do…"
"I must have misspoken," Lord Hagoromo said. "Mori, continue."
"In two weeks," Ami said, "the aforementioned villages' heads and representatives will gather at an extraordinary Chūnin Exam generously hosted by Hidden Grass."
"Two weeks?" Lady Amori asked sceptically. "Leaf has the world's best bureaucracy and we couldn't organise an examination in under a month. Even then, it would be a paltry shadow of the usual event."
Hazō wondered if Lady Amori remembered that the world's best bureaucracy had been gutted in the Great Collapse.
"Two weeks," Ami repeated. "The shortest amount of time I could get, and that was like pulling teeth. From a chakra megalodon. Yes, it's going to be much smaller in scope than past exams—but every day I could get is another day of Leaf, Mist, and Isan ninja not dying on the battlefield.
"But really, the exam part isn't what matters. What matters is that they will be gathering to ratify the Alliance for Military Integration and Tournaments for Youth. AMITY will be an international organisation that runs Chūnin Exams annually on a neutral basis, and its members will pledge to maintain the Chūnin Exams' status quo of comprehensive mutual defence at all times rather than only during the exam period. In other words, no member village will make war on any other village, nor allow another village or non-village force to make war on it. The annual Chūnin Exams will be used as an opportunity for world leaders to gather and negotiate over issues of global concern in a cooperative and organised fashion.
"You may have noticed, but Rock have not been invited to join AMITY. They have been invited to attend, and with all the most powerful men and women in the world gathering to decide the fate of the world just over the border, I strongly suspect they'll come. And then… we will make them beg."
The Hokage's smile was broad and ominous.
"Lord Hokage has been very detailed about the kind of concessions it would be reasonable to expect a vicious aggressor to make before they can be allowed to join an alliance for peace. Just thinking about them makes my blood run cold. On the other hand, when you think about the consequences of being the only village left out…"
Hazō, whose mind was still spinning at the broader implications (it was like his Seventh Path weapons treaty idea, only without the weapons and for real people and actually happening), almost hoped Rock wouldn't join. Wouldn't it be wonderful for the war to resume with Rock on one side and literally everyone else actively on the other?
"Oh," Ami said, "I forgot to mention one more detail, and then I promise I'm done and you can move on to the much more exciting part of reading the technical details in that report. You see, I wasn't the only one Lord Sixth dispatched as part of this mission. Between you and me, Kurosawa Ren's position in Mist had been rather shaky since her pardon, having been dismissed as clan head and known to be in the Mizukage's disfavour. This was why, as one of Mist's top diplomats, she was volunteered for an extremely dangerous mission that would allow her to demonstrate both her competence and her loyalty to Mist beyond question—which, to give her credit, she has since accomplished.
"Specifically, her mission was to track down Hoshigaki Kisame and persuade him to be Akatsuki's AMITY representative."
The chamber burst into an uproar—everyone here had lost someone at Nagi Island—and the Hokage had stopped smiling. Hazō didn't care, because everything had just finished clicking into perspective. If Akatsuki as a group could be persuaded that AMITY was a better path to world peace than whatever it was they were busy doing on their own, then the price of assaulting a member village wouldn't just be a war you couldn't win. It would be a war you couldn't fight.
Hazō suspected that one of the main topics of discussion at the first meeting would be false flag operations.
"Enough." The Hokage's voice wasn't angry, but it was resonant and commanding. Hazō suspected that "how to tell people of power to shut up" was one of those essential Hokage-ing lessons Asuma had picked up from Hiruzen.
"Everything worth having has a price," the Hokage said. "Treating Akatsuki as equals, as allies, disgusts me just like it does everyone here. The same goes for accepting Rock, under any terms, after all the Leaf blood they've spilled. Even so, the fact remains that if we can make AMITY work, it will be the biggest step towards lasting peace since Senju Hashirama invented the village system. That peace was Hashirama's dream. It was Tobirama's dream. It was my father's dream. It was Namikaze Minato's dream. It was Jiraiya's dream. It was Hyūga Hiashi's dream. Every ninja with the Will of Fire in their heart dreams of a world where the village they love is not under constant threat of attack by its enemies.
"AMITY may fail in any number of ways. It may collapse as human nature and human selfishness take over. It may be abused in ways that mean it no longer serves Leaf's interests. I've seen plenty of other noble endeavours fail to stand up to reality. But it will not fail because the people of Leaf lack self-control. Our founders invented the concept of lasting peace in a world of constant conflict. I intend for Leaf to live up to their legacy."
-o-
What do you do?
Voting closes on Saturday 5th of March, 1 p.m. New York time.
Silence draped itself over the room for twenty long seconds as everyone digested the implications of what Ami had said. Finally, Hazō shook his head regretfully.
"Ami, I have to admit that this is very impressive," he said.
Her face did not change but there was a slight tightening around the eyes that said she could hear a 'but' coming.
"In fact, you've really upstaged me here, and undone a lot of my work." He shrugged. "I was going to tell the Council that I had a proven method for killing Akatsuki members, but now you've made them necessary to Leaf's future safety. I suppose I'll have to settle for simply making us the richest village in the world."
"What are you talking about, Gōketsu?" Lord Hagoromo demanded. "Akatsuki are scum, but they're powerful scum. What possible method could you have for killing someone like that?"
"I'd like to hear that answer too," Naruto said, leaning forward. "I have a bone to pick with those people."
"And what was that about money?" asked the constantly-strapped Lord Kurusu.
"Well, doing the easy part first, this is the money." From a storage seal he brought forth an elegant rowan-wood chest, a cubit long, half that wide, and a few inches deep. The hinges and clasp were made of silver and when he opened it the inside was lined in a rich, midnight-blue velvet. The richness of the chest was effectively invisible because everyone was riveted to its contents.
Hazō lifted out one end of the bolt of woven silk. It was a subtle play of colors ranging from bright silver to storm-cloud grey, it was so light it nearly floated, and just looking at it was enough to make the fingers ache for its luxurious touch. He pulled the rest of the bolt out and flung it down the long table. It unfolded, ten feet, fifteen feet, flapping as it went. The end slid off the end of the table and puddled on the floor.
He placed the end of the cloth on the table and gestured for people to examine it. Lord Akimichi was the first to reach out; he took the end that Hazō had been holding and rubbed it between his fingers.
While that was happening, Hazō caught Asuma's eye for permission and, upon receiving it, nodded to Atomu who waited silently by the door. Atomu opened it and quietly waved in four Gōketsu civilians who were grunting under the weight of a massive box, larger and clearly heavier than a coffin. They placed it against the wall at one end of the room as Atomu began laying out seals on the floor. Hazō turned his attention back to the table and pulled out another seal, this one containing a thick silvery coil. He held the coil up, stretched between his two hands.
"This is a mile of spider thread," he began. "As you know—"
"A mile of spider silk."
Hazō looked over at Lord Kurusu's shocked expression. "Mile and a half, maybe?" he said. "I picked it up from the leftovers after we killed the Dragon." Suddenly his face lit up in realization. "Ah, that's right! You probably don't know that my uncle is about to become the Summoner of the Arachnid Clan. They produce silk in...let's say large quantities. They make houses out of it."
"Lord Hokage, Gōketsu is blatantly violating your orders!" Lord Hagoromo snapped. "You said that our clans were to be at peace with one another. This is yet another economic assault on my clan. The Hagoromo are widely known to be the major patrons of Leaf's weavers and dyers!"
"Lord Hagoromo, please do not try to cause the Gōketsu unearned trouble," Ami said, breaking in before Asuma could respond. "Leaf is dealing with a war right now, and the potential for ongoing peace throughout the Elemental Nations. We don't need you clumsily stirring the pot on an old grudge that has long been settled." She nodded politely to Asuma. "Please forgive my impertinence, Lord Hokage. I understand that I am your guest at this table and have no right to speak, but I simply cannot abide bullies or backstabbers. The silk that Hazō—that Lord Gōketsu is offering will give us a lot of leverage at the opening meeting of the AMITY. It's better quality than I've seen anywhere else, and if we make clear where it comes from then other nations will know that they can't steal the source from us. They'll be powerfully motivated to keep the peace so that they can maintain their supply."
She turned to Hazō. "Have you spoken to any rope-makers or bowyers? Silk is stronger and lighter than other materials. The more markets we can enter, the better for Leaf."
He smiled. "Thank you for speaking in my defense, Ami. It's not necessary." He turned to Hagoromo, carefully telling the Iron Nerve to maintain a polite expression. "Yes, you are a major patron of most of Leaf's weavers and dyers, but they don't work in chakra-spider silk. Only the Meiori have the knowledge to do that, and I think we can all agree that members of the Arachnid Clan count as chakra spiders.
"We have already approached the Meiori. We will be supplying them with both silk thread and with finished spider-woven silk fabric." He chuckled. "They were initially offended at the idea of selling someone else's wares, but we pointed out to them that their income has always been based on their ability to sell silk cloth, with the weaving of the cloth merely an input to the sale of it. Their predominant skill is knowledge of markets, and fashion, and relationships with customers, and the ability to negotiate." Hazō had been uncertain about that line, since it seemed like it might hurt the ego of the weaver clan, but Mari had pointed out that neither the Clan Head nor his father had been weavers themselves and it was likely that, as tightly as the clan held its secrets, there would be some stigma with not having the experience oneself.
"Buying the fabric from us along with the silk thread means that they can sell both human-made and spider-made product as separate lines." He forebore to mention that as of right now it didn't look like there was going to be a lot of spider-created fabric available, since most of the spiders weren't interested in weaving for humans. He had obtained this one bolt largely as a favor from Kumokōgō in gratitude for providing them with the skyslicer.
"I am hardly in charge of the Meiori," Hazō continued, "but my understanding is that they intend to continue selling to various dyers around Leaf, thereby ensuring that Lord Hagoromo's well-known mercantile competence and sunny disposition will allow him to continue making a living." Although less of one than he had previously. Mari had made no outright requests during negotiations with the Meiori, nor even any statements regarding the Gōketsu's feelings towards the Hagoromo. Still, the feud was well known throughout Leaf and the Meiori had caught the few very casual and deniable hints that she had dropped. Hagoromo-affiliated dyers were going to find themselves charged a markup, cutting into their profits and therefore into the Hagoromo income. Not enough to violate Asuma's orders, and with enough levels of separation that the Gōketsu couldn't reasonably be blamed, but one more kick in the teeth for the clan of bigots. (Somehow, Hazō needed to pry Harumitsu out of their halls and into the Gōketsu's before the kid got caught in the crossfire, and he needed to do it without violating Asuma's orders.)
"Despite having Merchant Council approval for this venture, I was still concerned that it might be disruptive to Leaf's artisans," Hazō continued. "As such, I have convinced the Meiori to consider training other weavers in the art of silk weaving. If they decide to go forward with the idea then the Gōketsu will be happy to supply any such merchants, thereby not preferencing any given artisan." Broaching the idea of training outsiders had been like dropping an armed explosive on the lunch counter, but Mari had pointed out to them that the Gōketsu could supply far more thread than the Meiori could use. Training outclan weavers to work with it in exchange for a permanent 10% of their profit from the final material was a path to riches beyond belief, far more than the Meiori could ever earn on their own. Mari said it was a tossup whether Lord Meiori would go for the idea or not, but a tossup was way better than expected.
"In response to Ami's question from earlier: Yes, we are going to be able to supply silk in such large quantities that we will be reaching out to rope makers, bowyers, and anyone else we can think of. My fellow Clan Heads, I invite you to meet with me at your convenience to see how this new resource can be used to enrich all of us." The Hagoromo, of course, would get fucked on every deal, right up to the absolute limit of what Mari felt the Gōketsu could get away with without violating the 'play nice' rules.
"'Such large quantities' is fuzzy," Lady Inuzuka asked, rubbing the fabric between finger and thumb contemplatively. "Exactly how much of this stuff can you provide? It's beautiful."
Hazō shrugged. "This bolt is half a cubit wide and thirty feet long. It took twenty-four hours to make for one weaver spider. Most of the spiders I've spoken to aren't interested in doing weaving for us, but there's a lot of spiders on the Seventh Path and if I can find even a handful then we'll be able to supply...well, let's just say that we're going to need to be careful not to glut the market. They're much more willing to give us thread, and they can make the stuff in ranges from 'too thin to see' up to about half an inch thick. They make it in literally unimaginable quantities—over the last three days, fifteen or twenty spiders probably produced twenty or twenty-five miles of the stuff in preparation for our Dragon-killing venture. We can supply more than everyone in Leaf can possibly use. I haven't done the math yet, but it's possible that we can provide more than everyone in the Elemental Nations can use."
"Excuse me," Lord Motoyoshi said. "Going back to an earlier statement. What was that about 'Dragon'?"
"Hm? Oh, right. That. The Arachnids and I killed a Dragon yesterday."
Laughter burst out around the room.
"Gōketsu, lying is unbecoming in a Council Meeting," Lord Hagoromo said. "Or perhaps you simply lost one too many sparring matches, took one too many punches to the head from that ridiculous Rock Lee person?"
Hazō eyed him for a moment, then pulled out another storage seal and held it up, one finger upraised. "This contains a normal salamander." He activated the seal to produce a cloth bundle, which he placed on the table and unwrapped to reveal the aforementioned salamander. It was perhaps two feet long and quite thoroughly dead, its head pithed by one of Kei's kunai after he asked her to hunt up a couple of the beasts.
"Note the size of the scales and claws," Hazō said. The largest of the scales was half the size of his pinky nail, the majority of them smaller. They varied in color from red to a rich purple to orange, a speckled pattern designed to warn off predators. The inch-long claws were to deal with any predators too stupid to notice the colors.
"What of it?" Asuma asked, visibly curious where this was going.
"They're small and quite thin." He picked the salamander up and gestured to the Gōketsu workmen standing against the wall. They hoisted the massive box off the ground with a grunt, lugged it over, and set it carefully on the table after spreading a tarp so as not to scratch the wood. The box was seven feet long and five feet wide. "Compare to this."
With some effort he undid the heavy rope latch (made out of silk, obviously) and flipped the massive lid back. (Lord Kurusu, Lady Amori, and Lord Hagoromo had to move out of the way so as not to get bonked.) Everyone leaned forward to see into the box as the workmen faded back.
The box was custom built with a haste that had made Kenta weep at the lack of quality he was forced to. It was thick, heavy oaken boards butted together without a tongue, a groove, or even a miter in sight. The planks had been roughly butted, nailed together hastily, and lined with slabs of granite so that the massive Dragon scale within did not eat through the wood. Purifier seals on the sides of the box sucked up the small amount of fumes that the scale emitted even when it wasn't in contact with anything it could dissolve. At the end of the box sat the Dragon's claw, four feet of murderously hooked death.
"That, Lords and Ladies, is one scale and one claw from the Dragon that we killed yesterday." Hazō tossed the salamander corpse onto the scale; it promptly let off a sizzling hiss like water cast onto hot iron. Curls of black, sooty smoke roiled off of it and were sucked up by the Purifier seals. "I'd advise you not to touch it."
Hazō let the moment linger for several seconds—partially for the drama and partially because he was watching out of the corner of his eye and could see that Atomu and the other two workmen were still finishing up, so Hazō needed to stretch this out. He also needed to keep the other Clan Heads' attention focused on himself so they didn't start asking questions that would ruin the surprise. Fortunately, when it came to focusing attention, one could always count on...
"This is preposterous!" Lord Hagoromo burst out. "I don't know what this thing is, but—"
"Softly," Shino said. "Hear him out. Lord Gōketsu, you were saying?"
Hazō nodded thanks to his fellow council member. "We haven't been keeping this a secret, but we haven't been broadcasting it either." He pulled a second salamander corpse from a seal and hefted it idly. "You're all familiar with the Seventh Path. Intelligent animals, alien society, and so on. The exact details of their origin is unclear, but they all agree that the Seventh Path and its inhabitants were created by the Sage of Six Paths." He chuckled. "I have no idea why he wasn't the Sage of Seven Paths. Anyway, just like us, they've had myths about Dragons for hundreds of years. Turns out, they aren't actually myths. You've all heard me talking about the Great Seal. According to the Arachnids, the Sage created it in order to lock the Dragons into a prison dimension. It's starting to fail and six-ish of the Dragons have escaped to the Seventh Path, where they spend most of their time lazing around and the rest of it killing and eating everything they can find."
"Lord Hokage, are you seriously going to entertain this nonsense? Dragons are a myth!"
"Yesterday, we struck back and killed one," Hazō said. "Just like this." He had been watching from the corner of his eye, spinning the tale out in order to buy time until Atomu was ready. The time was now, so Hazō turned and hurled the salamander corpse as hard and fast as he could, straight at where Atomu and the two workmen were standing against the back wall, holding up a heavy dropcloth.
Five feet from the wall, the salamander corpse pureed itself in midair. What hit the dropcloth was a slurry of meat and blood that slid down and puddled in the prepared section of the cloth.
No one spoke.
"Hazō, what did you just do?" Shikamaru asked calmly.
"We call it a skyslicer. It's a net made out of a single strand of this silk." He waved the coil of incredibly thin spider silk. "The strand is too thin to see, which makes it hard to work with, and the mesh on this one is extremely fine. You'll notice the Five Seal Barrier on the floor? One corner of the net is attached to it. The seal is causing the net to become indestructible and immovable. Anything that runs into it at sufficient speed will be carved up more finely than the finest blade. Lord Hagoromo, may I borrow your holdout knife?"
"Why do you need my knife?"
"I need a blade to demonstrate with and I wouldn't want you thinking that I was using a gimmicked weapon. I only need it for a moment."
Hagoromo stared at him, narrow-eyed.
"Oh, go on, Hagoromo," Lady Kei said. "Don't be a puss, give him the damn knife."
Reluctantly, Hagoromo shook back the voluminous sleeve from his left arm, exposing a leather holster containing a single blue-steel blade. With great reluctance, he handed the knife over.
Hazō turned it over in his hands, studying the elegant wave of the steel, the needle point, and the perfectly sharpened edge. He hefted it for a moment...and then hurled it full-force at the back wall.
An elegant and expensive blade went into the skyslicer net and several dozen steel flinders came out. The dropcloth billowed, absorbing their momentum, and the steel slid down to nest with the salamander puree.
"Sage!" Lady Kei gasped.
"My father gave me that knife, you son of a bitch!" Lord Hagoromo was on his feet, his face pale with rage, and his voice shaking.
"Oh?" Hazō had been looking with satisfaction at the destroyed knife, but at Hagoromo's words he turned back, a sincerely apologetic expression pasted onto his face through the power of the Iron Nerve. "I'm terribly sorry."
"Lord Gōketsu," the Hokage said gravely. "That was extremely ill-considered. You owe Lord Hagoromo an apology, and weregild."
"An apology?! An apology?! How is this little pissant traitor's apology going to bring back my father's memory?! He forged that knife himself and gave it to me on my first mission! I carried it for decades! I killed four men with it! You motherfucking son of a foreign whore! How dare you?! You crawl into our homes, you sneer and simper and corrupt! You bring that filthy, slutty, deviant into our village and claim that she's—"
"Shadow Possession Jutsu!"
Shikamaru's shadow lashed out, engulfed Lord Hagoromo, and froze him in place. Shikamaru pivoted, his shadow dragging Hagoromo around so that the two were facing each other.
Every chair around the table hurtled backwards as some of the most powerful people in the world came to their feet, ready for battle. Naruto placed his fingers in a cross but hesitated before actually creating clones.
The crackling heat of a shared campfire washed across the room, the hint of a raging forest fire behind it. The solidity of an ancient stone hearth, the foundation of a beloved home, wrapped its protection around them even as the metaphysical earth beneath their feet trembled with incipient wrath.
"Sit. Down."
No one moved except to exchange glances.
The Hokage waited.
No one moved.
"If I am forced to repeat myself," the Hokage said calmly, "no one here is going to like what happens next."
Slowly, the members of the Clan Council took their seats...all except for Shikamaru and the shadow-trapped Hagoromo.
"Shikamaru—"
"Sir, I would be very appreciative if you did not give that order just yet."
Asuma's eyebrow went up and his lips quirked in amusement. "And what order might that be that you would so appreciate me not giving?"
"Sir," Shikamaru said calmly, not looking away from Hagoromo. "If the Nara have ever been of good service to you, I would be grateful for a moment of silence in which I may decide whether or not the pleasure I will derive from killing this entity is worth being executed for treason."
"Lord Hokage—"
Asuma waved Hagoromo to silence without looking away from Shikamaru. "I believe it would be best if you didn't speak right now, Ritsuo. Give Lord Nara a moment and I'm sure the vaunted Nara intelligence will catch up to the situation and he will stand down as he knows he should. As his father would have wanted." He paused. "And I'm certain he will do it before I have to order him to do it."
Hazō watched the scene, every muscle tense. This was not Shikamaru. Shikamaru was lazy. His body was always sagging and nearly limp. His eyes were half-lidded, his breathing slow and deep as though he were right on the edge of sleep. This person here, standing tall and tense, his breathing fast and angry, with foxfire dancing through his shadow and across the body of his victim...who was this?
"You are correct, My Lord," Shikamaru said after a moment, his voice clinical. "I am not going to kill him. I am not even going to injure him. I am, however, going to make a point.
"Hagoromo Ritsuo," Shikamaru said calmly. "When Senju Hashirama decided to change the world, he approached all the most powerful clans in the region and recruited them to his cause. These clans became the Founding Clans of Leaf." He paused. "The Nara are a Founding Clan, Ritsuo. The Hagoromo are not.
"You insulted my wife once before. In response, the Nara moved against your wealth, but we did not raise our hand to you personally, nor to your people. You have now insulted her again, here in this hall that exists solely that the leaders of Leaf may have a place to come and work side by side with one another. You have insulted her in front of me, and in front of my peers. In my grandfather's time this would have meant a duel between us or a war between our clans. You would lose that duel, sir, and your clan would lose that war." Thin lips curved into an expression that was nothing like a smile. "Only a fool would issue death threats in front of the entire Clan Council, and I, sir, am no fool. I ask only that you remember this: if you ever speak an unkind word about Kei again, if you so much as express mild dislike for the color of her robe, then you are going to become the singular focus of my ill will. I invite you to consider how many shadows there are in this world, Ritsuo, and what value that places on the ill will of the Nara."
Shikamaru pivoted to his left, facing the wall. Trapped in the Shadow Possession jutsu, Hagoromo pivoted to his left, facing the table on which sat the massive Dragon scale, the corpse of a salamander still dissolving into crispy sludge atop it.
Shikamaru extended one arm in front of himself. Hagoromo copied the motion, extending his arm over the Dragon scale.
"Shikamaru," Asuma said, warning in his tone.
"I will not hurt him." Shikamaru lowered his hand slowly, bringing it closer to the floor. Hagoromo lowered his hand slowly, bringing it closer to the Dragon scale.
"Stop," Hagoromo said, his eyes widening. "Stop this, Nara." His muscles strained, tendons standing out as he struggled to regain control of his body.
"Shikamaru, Kei would not want this," Ami said calmly.
"Perhaps not," Shikamaru said. "But I do." He lowered his hand another inch, bringing Hagoromo's straining hand to within a finger width of the Dragon scale.
"Stop it, Nara!" Hagoromo shouted. "Stop this at once! You are risking civil war!" The feeling of a looming thunderstorm spread through the room.
"If I fall, it will be forward."
The thunderstorm hesitated and then retreated into Hagoromo's soul.
Hazō flicked his gaze around the room. The Clan Heads were on the edge of their seats, tension in every line of their bodies. No one wanted the scene to continue, but no one was willing to actively tackle Shikamaru for fear that it would push Hagoromo bodily onto the scale.
"Don't worry, Ritsuo," Shikamaru said calmly. "The reason that Lord Hokage is doing nothing at the moment is because I promised not to injure you. He knows that all he need do is wait until I am finished making my point. It is true; I am not going to injure you. I simply want you to recognize that I could. I could make you put your hand on that Dragon scale and then stand there while the flesh melted off your bones and your bones charred to ash."
He pivoted, bringing Hagoromo around so that they were once more facing each other, and allowed their arms to drop and hang at their sides. "I could do that, or I could make you gouge out your own eye, cut off your own fingers. Carve off your own lips and ears, slice out your own tongue. I could cripple you and leave you a horrific monster. You would have to watch through your one remaining eye as your children cowered away from you in fear and disgust while your wife refused to touch you ever again. I want you to remember that, Ritsuo. In the dark of the night, in your private chambers with no one around and lanterns burning bright to chase away every trace of shadow, I want you to remember what the Nara could do to you and yours.
"Kei has an expression: 'I have had a difficult few days and I would dearly love to kill something.' I have had a difficult few days, Ritsuo, and I am out of patience with you. So go ahead. Insult my wife. Spread rumors about her sexuality, or how she cuckolds me with a woman, or about how she is secretly a traitor to Leaf. Try it. See, as Jiraiya once said to another bigot in these chambers, how that works out for you."
"Lord Hokage, are you truly going to allow this?! The assault of one Clan Head on another in the Council Chamber itself?!"
"Do not presume to tell me what I can and cannot do, Ritsuo. Not even by implication." The Hokage paused for several long seconds, letting the moment hang. Finally, he spoke again, his voice calm. "That's enough, Shikamaru. You've had your moment. Release him."
"As you command." Shikamaru made a cutting gesture with one hand and his shadow slipped off of Hagoromo, sliding back across the floor to where the light specified it should be.
Hagoromo stepped back, his weight shifting onto his rear leg in a modified version of a Cat Style guard stance. His hands came up in front of his hara, fingers ready to cut handseals.
"Sit down, Lord Hagoromo." The Hokage's voice was calm. Hagoromo hesitated, but he reluctantly obeyed.
Shikamaru's eyes wandered up the table, surveying the conservative Clan Heads that sat near Hagoromo. "Those of you who are allies of the Hagoromo: you are welcome to approach the Nara in friendship, and we would be glad to receive you. We have several highly lucrative opportunities for which we need partners. Alternatively, you may remain friends with...that." He chinned towards Hagoromo.
"Lord Nara." The Hokage's voice was now the flick of a whip. "I said enough."
"Of course, sir." Shikamaru slid into his chair and interlaced his fingers on the table, turning his gaze to the Hokage with an expression of polite interest on his face.
"Lord Hagoromo, Lord Nara, you will remain after this meeting concludes. The three of us are going to have some very serious words. For now, we will move on."
"Are you joking? That little—"
"Ritsuo!"
Hagoromo's mouth snapped shut as the Hokage's presence loomed around them.
"We will set this issue aside for now," the Hokage said. "As I said, there are going to be words spoken after this meeting. For now, I believe everything will be better if we move on."
He leaned back in his chair and folded his hands on his stomach, slowly surveying his Council members and Ami.
"Well," he said at last. "This has been an exciting meeting. Let's recap." He nodded to Ami, sitting very quietly at the far left corner of the table. "In an unprecedented act of political maneuvering, a Mist jōnin has renationalized herself to Leaf, although I think that point may have been elided. The war is ending and peace may ring out across the Elemental Nations for the first time in recorded history." He nodded to Hazō. "Not only do Dragons exist, but Hazō killed one with the aid of enormous spiders who are going to enrich Leaf beyond our wildest dreams. Also, he created a new weapon that could kill Akatsuki members if we could simply bait them into running through it." He nodded to Hagoromo and Shikamaru. "Two of my Clan Heads essentially came to blows and are going to have strips torn off them after this meeting, possibly followed by sanctions on their clans." He looked around the room, meeting each eye in turn. "Would anyone else care to upend my world?"
Shikamaru raised his hand.
Asuma rubbed his head. "You did realize that I was joking, right?"
"I did, yes. I believe I mentioned that I have had a difficult few days?"
"Go ahead," Asuma said with a sigh. "Tell us what you've got."
Shikamaru leaned forward, interlacing his fingers and leaning on his forearms He looked up and down the table, visually taking the temperature of the room. "I believe everyone here is familiar with the casualty reports that have been coming out of my office?"
There were nods and 'sure's and 'yes's all up and down the table.
"We've been giving those Rock bastards a pasting," Lady Inuzuka said, teeth flashing in a warrior's grin. "Surprisingly light losses, all things considered." She grimaced. "Although the Inuzuka have been hard hit."
"Everyone has been hard hit," Shikamaru said. "Those reports were bunk, first to last."
"What?" she demanded. "What are you talking about?"
"Unfortunately, it turns out that Leaf has not been infiltrated by Rock, nor any other polity so far as I can determine. There are no spies scurrying through our walls dropping false information in their wake. There are no genjutsu operatives convincing everyone that reality is not as it is. There is no one to blame for this but ourselves." His voice had been growing more intense and he stopped talking, his jaw clenched. When he continued he was once again the pride of the Nara, calm and unemotional.
"Many of the Tower's low-level staff died in the Collapse. Their replacements are new and inexperienced. They are literate, numerate, and most of them have some clerical training, but nothing like the level that is required, nor are they familiar with proper procedure for critical documentation and appropriate handling thereof. More importantly, most of them have little experience interacting with ninja, most especially with the Nara. They do not understand that we value truth, clarity, and efficiency beyond all else in our communications. They instead expect that bringing bad news could be fatal and thus they feel motivated to soften the blow or even delay passing the news at all."
The room had gotten very quiet, the faces very serious.
"Shikaramu—Lord Nara," Asuma said. "Are you telling us that our entire picture of the war is false?"
"Indeed. Before providing specifics, I would like to note that I take full responsibility. It is the duty of a senior administrator to be on top of his subordinates. I recognized that our people were new and I allowed for that in their training, but I did not take into account their lack of experience with ninja and the actions that would result therefrom. Lord Hokage, with your permission I have prepared a set of recommendations for how to proceed. The recommendations include a list of suggested names for my successor. I would ask—"
Asuma waved dismissively. "Not now, Lord Nara. We'll deal with it after the meeting. For now, give us the bad news."
"Yes sir." He cleared his throat and took a breath. "The most recent reports that you all received said that said that Leaf has lost 12 full or special jōnin, three dozen chūnin, and over a hundred genin. I believe everyone would agree that at a personal level these numbers are tragedies, but that at a strategic level they are quite light. It was this fact that finally attracted my attention, and after three days of investigation I have identified the systemic issues and come to a more accurate picture of the war. The actual numbers are quite a bit worse.
"Leaf has been hammered in the past two years. The Battle on the Beach"—Naruto shifted uncomfortably—"the Battle of Nagi Island, the Collapse...when this war started, Leaf had approximately 1100 genin. We now have 740. We had 400 chūnin. We now have 240. We had 20 special jōnin. We now have 2—Gōketsu Yuno and Kei Anko. We had 20 full jōnin who were not people in this room. We now have 8."
The room was silent.
"Lord Nara," Asuma said carefully. "We have lost seventy-five percent of our senior forces?"
"Yes sir."
"...I see."
"How did we miss this?" Hinata asked. "I knew that Uncle Moritaka was killed in the line, but..."
"That's exactly how we missed it. Each clan knows its own losses but clan deaths are a private matter. We don't conceal them, our close friends probably know of the loss, but the Tower is supposed to be the mechanism for collating all of the information and providing accurate data on the overall picture. And by 'the Tower', I mean the bureaucracy. Lord Hokage does not have time to read every single mission report. He sets high-level strategic goals and occasionally orders a specific mission. He does not micromanage personnel."
"Who did this?" Lady Inuzuka demanded. "Which cowardly little—"
"Stop." Shikamaru's voice was sharp. "I will not be giving names to any of you. The failures are institutional, not due to any specific individual. These people are my responsibility, their failure is my failure."
"That's not good enough, Nara," Lord Kyoshō said. "We need those names."
"No. You do not need them, you will not get them, and any further request is as insulting as it is stupid and a waste of time."
"Well," Ami said with a bright smile. "I suggest we don't talk about that at the first meeting of AMITY. Perhaps this would be a good time to figure out what we are going to say?"
Author's Notes: Calling someone by their first name in the world of MfD is a fraught act. It means that you are close friends, or family...or that they are your inferior.
XP AWARD: 0 (The entire plan was 'Let eaglejarl write whatever he wants')
Brevity XP: 1 (Null string is the shortest possible plan!)
"GM had fun" XP: 10 Haven't had this much fun with a chapter in ages. Thank you for letting me write it.
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"And then she gives this impish little grin—like this—and before he can stop her, she pulls back the curtain, and what's there… but a full row of Icha Icha first editions! And Lord Shibuki goes bright red, like he's wishing the earth would open up and swallow him, and after a few seconds, he stutters, 'Th-They were a present!', and that's when I crack up, because I can tell that she'll be the one to make the final call, and she likes it when people act genuine rather than diplomatic."
Ami's "welcome back" dinner was in full swing at the Naked Jaybird. A roaring hearth, whole Keishi-style roast pheasants (Hazō was very glad he'd consulted Mari in advance and learned that Leaf had a taboo on eating deer), a cornucopian array of side dishes which did not stop Noburi stealing Hazō's favourites whenever he wasn't looking, and saké cups that were shallow but diligently refilled… it was the perfect capstone to an exhausting week of research and dragonslaying.
After stripping her pheasant to the bone in what seemed like mere seconds (Hazō had seen the same predatory efficiency from a very hungry Kei before, and suspected it was Mori Clan training), the woman of the hour had turned to regaling them with stories of her travels. Even the comparatively well-travelled members of Team Uplift had never been to most of the places Ami described, and the pictures she painted made it thrilling to think that, if AMITY succeeded, they might one day be able to visit them at leisure.
"Seriously, though," Ami went on, "once I got past the hard part of convincing the border guards not to murder me—they call Waterfall isolationist for a reason—it was just what I needed after the nightmare that was Cloud. Lady Fū is like a playful kitten—all cute and perky and irresponsible, and you get the sense that if she thinks for one second that you're a threat to her village, she'll just punch a hole in your chest and be back to reading smut or playing kickball before your body hits the ground. Poor Lord Shibuki, on whom she shoves all the hard work even though she's technically the leader, is completely the opposite. He's one of those very serious young men with an over-developed sense of responsibility"—she gave Hazō a playful wink—"and he's always taking notes when people are talking, and he's very non-confrontational, and he's always saying 'you may wish', like 'You may wish to review your facts' when he means 'You have no idea what you're talking about', or 'You may wish to rephrase that statement' when he means 'You're lying out of your ass'. But then if you push a little bit too far, Lady Fū appears out of nowhere and grins at you over his shoulder—I don't know how she does that; she's tiny—and that's when you stop dead and back off like that little furry creature you were playing with turned out to be a bear cub and suddenly Mummy's back. Also, between you and me, I think they might have one of those 'She sees him as her future boyfriend; he sees her as his little sister' dynamics going on. Kind of like Captain Zabuza and Yukino but with fewer death threats."
Ami took a slow sip of saké in what looked uncomfortably like a ritual gesture of respect for Captain Zabuza's spirit—in Mist, the saké would have represented the dark waters of the abyss that he now shared with the honoured ancestors.
Hazō didn't want to think about Captain Zabuza. He still saw him in his dreams sometimes, sword sharp enough to cut from beyond the grave and gleaming with inevitability, even though his collection of nightmare fuel had expanded a long way since those innocent days.
"It's good to have you back, Ami," he said perhaps a little too loudly. "Welcome to your new home."
Kei, sitting with Ami on one side and Tenten on the other, and glowing in a way that almost made her look like a shadow of Akane (unfortunately unlike the real Akane, who was sitting next to him and spending altogether too much time staring into space), gave her sister a warm, slightly anxious smile.
"I am still unable to believe it," she said. "Ami, please tell me one more time that you are in fact now a Leaf shinobi and expected to reside in this village with me indefinitely."
"Sure am," Ami said. "Lawfully, even. I'm officially the most valuable ninja in the world, insofar as I'm the only one formally assigned a price, and a pretty hefty price since Leaf's even more desperate for jōnin than Mist is. Making it a mutually-agreed exchange between the villages means we're not setting a precedent for AMITY that you can defect and get away with it, and it probably wouldn't work for anyone who doesn't have massive trust from her Kage and an existing positive track record in the village of destination thanks to a poorly-defined ambassadorship system made as a fig leaf for Kage nepotism and then used as a soft banishment tool by somebody dumb enough to miss the part where I volunteered. Not that it would be a problem if it did, but I like being unique. Also, I'll make sure extradition agreements for missing-nin are a topic during the first AMITY session if the Hokage doesn't, so you guys get to be unique as well."
"Ami," Hazō said, "I don't think insufficient uniqueness has ever been your problem. How does this work now, anyway? Are you still a Mori Clan ninja? Are you clanless? Are you planning to get adopted into a Leaf clan?"
"Yes," Ami said. "But to answer your more specific question, no, Hazō, I am still not marrying you."
Several people stared at Hazō in shock.
"Don't get the wrong idea," Hazō said quickly. "It's not like I ever proposed to her."
"Yes, you did," Noburi said in his usual helpful way. "Kei and I were there for the response."
"Additionally," Ami said, "I note the implication that you have an unexpressed desire to marry me even now. Please do not be concerned; this is a surprisingly common phenomenon.
"Regardless, my current clan status is unclear and confusing to all parties, which, while not a product of specific action on my part, fits my preferences perfectly. This is especially true for the part where every clan must now question whether they wish to adopt me and thereby remove a significant political rival and point me and my talents only at their foes, as well as gaining a jōnin at a time when those are at a premium, and securing unmediated access to the inner workings of AMITY, at the price of giving me unmediated access to the inner workings of their clan, living with me every day, and having sole responsibility for keeping me constrained. They must also weigh whether doing so would earn them the enmity of my other rivals as well as those simply biased against me due to my foreign origins. So many headaches for everyone, with no effort at all from me. In fact, perhaps I should allude vaguely to the possibility of adoption in a way that will reliably reach clan ears, purely in order to stimulate such cogitation."
"Speaking of the inner workings of AMITY, whatever those are and whatever unmediated access to them means," Noburi said, "did you really pull off what Hazō says you pulled off? Because he made it sound like you'd done something crazy like end all war forever."
Ami shrugged. "Pretty much."
"Hey, I was being serious."
"Mmm," Ami said. "Is that so strange? I mean, war sucks. It's the ultimate proof of our failure as a species. A little implacable ideological conflict here, a little existential threat there, sprinkle in some territorial disputes for flavour, and suddenly we regress to the level of chakra beasts, only with the full scope of human genius to apply to our animal lust for violence. I came back from my mission yesterday, and so many people were just… missing. The KEI hasn't been gutted, but there are people gone I was looking forward to promoting, and people gone whom I needed where they were, and people gone who had potential I wanted to see unlocked. On the other end, there are people I was plotting to take down myself, and now all that plotting's wasted because they got to take the easy way out and die honourably in battle.
"I know I'm your older and wiser senior in the way of the ninja," she said, taking a morose sip of saké, "but this was my first war too. Watching friends die is normal, but having people just disappear in swathes? I lost the survivors from my Academy cohort when, as the official account goes, Yagura went for a healthy stroll down the beach with a bunch of jōnin and got ambushed by Akatsuki. Then I lost most of my remaining co-workers at Nagi Island. Don't get me wrong, those jōnin losses are what made the AMI the political powerhouse that it is, and freeing Mist from Yagura is worth a lot of dead friends too, but a woman has her limits."
"So… what?" Noburi asked. "You got fed up with war and decided to end it? Like, not this war, but the entire concept?"
"Well, no," Ami admitted. "I… actually, I owe Kei an apology. Not that I was planning to do it here and now, but eh. I just survived getting grilled by three different demigods in as many weeks. I can take a little public embarrassment."
She turned to Kei and bowed her head. "Kei, I am so, so sorry."
Kei shifted back on her bench so sharply that Tenten had to practically jump to avoid full-body physical contact.
"What?! What do you mean? What did I do?"
"I swore to protect you as your big sister," Ami said. "I know I failed at that in many and varied ways back when I was just a kid who—no, no excuses. I screwed up a lot and that's on me. This one, though, wasn't me being a kid. There was a war on, and I knew you were in danger, and I just let it happen. I'm sorry I took so long to realise, and I'm so glad you kept yourself safe anyway."
Kei mutely shook her head in denial of whichever parts of that apology made Ami sound less than perfect, while Shikamaru looked up from where he had been half-heartedly poking the remains of his dish with a knife.
"To clarify, and please don't take this as an expression of disapproval because under the circumstances it is quite the opposite, but did you just potentially eliminate war and send humanity's future careening off in a hitherto unimaginable direction purely out of concern for your younger sister's welfare?"
Ami didn't look away from Kei's face as she replied. "Wouldn't anyone do as much for their family if they could?"
-o-
The silence after Ami's words lasted long enough for the inn staff to bring and serve the entire third course (matcha and chestnut cake, a Naked Jaybird speciality backported from Yuno's Isanese party cuisine), then do as civilians not wishing to be murdered at a ninja party usually did and retreat out of potential eavesdropping range.
"Don't get me wrong," Ami finally said in a distinctly casual voice, "it's against my religion, which I guess is the Will of Fire now, to do anything with just one purpose. I'm hitting the point of diminishing returns here in Leaf, and that means I need free access to the other villages. I don't think I'd get a warm welcome in Rock after what we're about to do to them, and I don't have enough lives to mess around in Cloud just yet, but Sand is looking deliciously unstable, and the minors are just a toy chest of possibilities. It's going to take time for 'we promise not to butcher each other at the first opportunity' to turn into anything as convenient as freedom of travel, much less the basic openness I need to operate, but not expecting to die in a pointless battle at any moment means I actually have that time.
"Speaking of which, Hazō, you can kill Dragons now, right? Badass. For my peace of mind, tell me you've got that stuff handled and I haven't stopped humans from murdering each other just in time for some otherworldly horror to do the job for them."
"Err."
"Hazō? Hazō, I was looking for something like 'Hell, yeah, Ami, I'm nearly done choking the last one to death with my bare hands, and also may I say how lovely you're looking this evening', not an ominous silence."
"No," Hazō said. "That wasn't meant to be ominous. There's one dead Dragon out there—or there was until they incinerated the corpse—and you can bet I'm coming for the rest. If I hesitated, it's because there are five different Dragons, with five different body types and sets of powers, and we have a crippling lack of reliable intel, and that means I can't guarantee that my plan will work against all of them. That doesn't matter, though. I came up with one Dragon-killing superweapon. I'll come up with five more if that's what it takes to save the world."
"Badass," Ami repeated. "You keep that up and maybe I'll give the marriage thing another thought."
"Also," Hazō added as Kei gave Ami a horrified stare, "the Crusade will get over there and back me up any year now. I'm not saying the Arachnids and the Hornets aren't giving it everything they have. Honestly, alien as they are, I feel like I've learned a lot about sacrifice from watching the way they live and die. But sometimes I feel like I'm working harder to save the Seventh Path than most of the Seventh Path is."
Hazō wasn't mentioning the skyslicers by name. Those were a major state secret now, like the skywalkers had been, and Hazō had a strong feeling that Asuma was facepalming at the fact that Hazō had revealed and even demonstrated an anti-Akatsuki trump card in front of Ami (or even in front of anyone other than Asuma himself). It probably wasn't a good time to point out that he might have slightly oversold skyslicers in his entirely natural desire to one-up Ami: Leaf had little by way of natural fliers who could manoeuvre like the Hornets, Akatsuki had Itachi and potentially other sensory abilities he didn't know about, and most importantly, they were never stupid enough to come to a serious battle in ones and twos (Hidan seemed to be the exception, and look how that had worked out for him). Skyslicers were maybe a solid weapon against a single Akatsuki flier with no relevant special senses or defences (was Kakuzu's armour just very strong or literally impenetrable? Everyone who could answer that question was dead, technically including Kakuzu). After that, the remaining Akatsuki on the field would investigate, find the skyslicer, figure out a means of detection, and then wipe Leaf off the map in revenge.
"Saying I've got that stuff handled would be an exaggeration," Hazō said, "but we've just won a major victory and proof of concept. Dragons can be killed just like anything else, and it can be done with simple human ingenuity rather than Sage-level seals that don't even do their job properly.
"What about you? AMITY is an amazing achievement. Even if, no, when I kill all the Dragons and restore the Great Seal, it won't mean anything if humanity just wipes itself out instead. If AMITY works, it'll be the best shot we've had yet at pulling out of this spiral of extinction before it's too late. Honestly, it's probably the single biggest contribution to Uplift anyone's ever made. Is there anything we can do to help?"
Ami considered as she systematically disassembled her chestnut cake in eerie parallel with Kei next to her (and Shikamaru watched curiously, as if taking notes).
"I could do with a dossier on Isan," she finally said. "Remember how I spent much of this past year working overtime to avoid getting any intel I'd have to take back to Kurosawa? The flip side of that is that, well, I don't have intel, and the Village Council is bound to send their best negotiator to the Chūnin Exams—I'll be personally insulted if they don't. Political structure, personality profiles, cultural specificities… Isan is weird, and the Convenor can't let herself get blindsided at the meeting that'll make or break world peace."
"Can do," Hazō said, relieved that there actually was something he could do to help and Ami didn't just tell him to his face that he was redundant to the process of seeing one of his life's ambitions fulfilled. His plan had always been to wait until he had Shadow Clone-granted godhood, with the power to simply punch any die-hard war hawks out of relevance. Could he have got there before Ami, using the talents of his own mistress of persuasion? He had very mixed feelings about asking her for detailed advice (and he had to admit that pride was a big one), but maybe understanding how she'd done what she'd done would hold hints for how to make the next global breakthrough his own.
"After all," he went on, "you're talking to the best source of information on Isan outside Isan itself. We're the only clan with our very own Yuno. Heck, we're the only clan with anyone who's ever been to Isan. Really, it would be no exaggeration to say that we've shaped Isan's history more than any ninja alive, sometimes by accident. Also, what's a convenor?"
"The head of AMITY as a support organisation and the neutral-ish chairperson and moderator of the annual meetings," Ami said. "It's all in the report. Somebody's going to have to process and implement those decisions the AMITY members make on an international level, as well as organise Chūnin Exams now that they're too important to leave under one village's control—that's the Tournaments for Youth part; I swear it took me as long to come up with something for the 'Y' as it did the rest of the proposal. In other words, there needs to be an enormous bureaucracy, which I've put myself in charge of assembling and training before anyone else could. The Hokage's all in favour, less because he's thrilled about me having more power and more because it means Leaf having more power, and I have more of a claim to the job than any candidate the other villages could propose instead. I already have a shortlist drawn mainly from the KEI and the AMI, though I'm going to have to revise the former since half of it is dead now. I'll need plenty of trained civilians too, and… maybe I'm a little less optimistic about getting those in Leaf than I was when I started."
Shikamaru winced.
"Either way," Ami said, "once the Exams are over, I'm expecting to spend a while bouncing around the continent like Sammy on Inuzuka energy treats trying to get all this set up."
"Speaking of the Exams," Hazō said, mentally ticking off another box on the journey to Omnikage Ami, or possibly Omnikage Kei, "do you think I should attend? I know I'm no diplomat, but it would be a valuable opportunity to spread the news about the Dragons—I really need more sealmasters to figure out the Great Seal, and at this point there's nothing for it but to look outside Leaf."
"I don't like to say it," Ami said, "but I don't know how receptive they'll be. Everyone's focus is going to be on the war, ending the war, screwing over Rock as the Sage intended, and putting the foundations in place to maximise their power and security in the new world order. Also, Cloud is the only one with a publicly-known summoner, though I'll eat the Hokage hat if the other villages haven't been gathering more scrolls on the quiet like you guys have. I'm never going to say this to the Hokage because I'm too young to be killboxed, but frankly the best thing if you want to save the world would be for him to do a Hashirama and start handing out scrolls. There's no better way to get the villages to move on this than to hear that it's real from a ninja they trust enough to give a scroll in the first place.
"Also," she added, "giving every AMITY member a direct hotline to the rest would advance AMITY development by years. Maybe more than a decade, though after a point the cultural shift will be more important than what's happening up top. Buuut… I'm pretty sure the Seventh would rather let the world maybe get devoured by Dragons than definitely give away a big chunk of Leaf's firepower, so don't mind me."
Hazō nodded. It was almost a shame he was aiming far higher than Hokage. Asuma wasn't unreasonable as treason-sensitive dictators went, but "not unreasonable" wasn't enough when it came to what the world needed from its leaders right now.
"When I think about it," he said, "I should probably be careful getting involved with AMITY anyway. I have a… history… with Akatsuki members, and some love me, but others very definitely hate me, and honestly, there's room to argue over which is worse."
"Ooh," Ami said. "Later, I'll want details on that. I'm pretty sure most Akatsuki stuff is need-to-know only, but for obvious reasons I'm going to need to know—I've got a lot of trawling to do through the classified archives before the Exams, for that reason among others. Per the invitation, we should just be getting Hoshigaki Kisame, and he's at the top end of the sanity spectrum Grandpa Ryūgamine and I drew up from Mist's intel. You haven't pissed him off, right?"
"Never knowingly met the man."
"That's in theory, of course," Ami said. "There's exactly one person outside Akatsuki who has a clue about their internal dynamics, and if you're feeling brave enough to ask him, be my guest—or his, which is the risk. So for all I know, the whole lot of them might decide to turn up, and it's not like we can kick them out."
Hazō nodded. "You know how I feel about interacting with them as well."
"Keen to the point of treason?"
"That was one time, and it was a lie made up by Uchiha Itachi anyway. Let's not forget that we're technically in a public space where people could get ideas. No, trust me, if I never see an Akatsuki member again, it'll be too soon… except for the part where I'd give my right arm to get Sasori's help with the Great Seal, which is why I may have to talk to them sooner or later."
"I'll let Orochimaru know," Ami said with a perfectly straight face. "He might take that deal."
Hazō hadn't expected Ami to ever joke about Orochimaru again after what had nearly happened. He wondered what was going through her head. They'd never talked about the aftermath either, and Hazō didn't know if it would be better to let sleeping dogs lie or to clear the air. Could he be real friends with Ami while the issue of her death threats against his family still lay unresolved between them?
"Honestly," Hazō said, "if I wasn't terrified of ever drawing his attention to me and my loved ones again, and assuming I had the slightest reason to trust him, I might consider it. There's enough at stake.
"Unrelatedly to any of that, have you heard anything about Hidan recently?"
"Nope," Ami said. "Nothing since your run-in with him at O'Uzu. Why do you ask?"
"No reason."
"Uh-huh," Ami said.
"Put another way," Hazō said, "talk to Asuma first."
"Right," Ami said. "Ugh, there's so much to catch up on. I've got to learn everything a Leaf jōnin learns over the course of their career, plus get all my preparations done for AMITY, in two weeks, and there's still stuff I'm not cleared for because I'm new and the Hokage's properly paranoid. As a Mori, I drink information like a fish, but as Ami, if I don't have time to hang out with people and do some garden-variety plotting, I'm going to go insane. More insane."
"I hear you," Hazō said with a sympathetic warmth. "I always start feeling down when I get so mired in clan head business that I don't get to do sealing research for a while."
"And sure enough," Noburi chipped in, "it's driven him insane."
"Noburi," Hazō said, "you willingly married a girl who will sooner or later murder you for suspected infidelity, where 'suspected infidelity' includes extended eye contact."
"I'm in love," Noburi said. "That's a socially-accepted kind of crazy, which means it's actually sane."
"See?" Ami grinned. "Noburi gets it. Sanity is defined by society. That means she who controls society controls sanity itself."
"That is not the end goal I expected from your plans," Hazō admitted.
"Well, no," Ami said. "You'd have to be insane to believe that."
Hazō noted that this did not in any way confirm or deny whether she was being serious.
"Speaking of controlling society," he said, "you're my best source of information on Mist right now. What do you think of me contacting the Kurosawa for help with the Great Seal, and maybe trade relations in general? Any advice?"
"Broadly speaking," Ami said slowly, "it's not a good time. The AMITY members are giving up some of their most reliable tools, and finding new ones they feel they can trust is an entire process. If another village steals your secrets under the guise of trade, and you can't retaliate by declaring war, or even assassinating people, what do you do? Developing new enforcement mechanisms is going to be a major task for the AMITY members, and making them work is going to be a major task for the AMITY organisation. Contact between ninja of different villages is going to be complicated for a while.
"That said," her expression brightened, "you have the world's most powerful trump card on your side."
"Please don't tell me you're referring to yourself."
"Duh," she said. "I mean, I want to say 'Kei' just to trip you up, but Mist isn't her home anymore, and thank the ancestors in the depths for that. I reckon I can get Lord Utakata to take the Great Seal business seriously, and since we're talking an existential risk for humanity I'm not even going to charge you a favour. Trade relations are your own business, though, and I'm not sticking my neck out for you. Although…"
She held a dramatic pause.
"What is it, Ami?"
"You've been really sweet, throwing me a party like this. I could give you a little freebie. How would you like to know about the new Kurosawa clan head?"
"Is it someone I know?" Hazō asked.
"It's your evil twin," Ami said. "Do you remember Kurosawa Hanzō?"
"I know of him," Hazō said after a moment's thought. "He was in the year above at the Academy. We didn't really interact, even less than with the other Kurosawa kids. Also, I think he stole the name I was supposed to have, but since he wasn't born yet, I'm prepared not to hold it against him."
"For everyone else," Ami said, "Hanzō is the son of Kurosawa Saki, Ren and Hana's cousin who died in the Battle of Bloody Mist—that's the one where Akatsuki crashed the party; Kurosawa spread the name as a way of reinforcing the association between Yagura and the excesses of his early reign, which I'll admit was a smart move.
"Hanzō is intelligent, ambitious, ruthless, and charming. He wants to be Mizukage, and that means he started out preparing himself to take the hat when Yagura died—in other words, working to become the kind of man who could inherit a Mist both weakened in military terms and falling apart with the loss of its lynchpin. Then when Yagura died well ahead of schedule and Kurosawa took over, he started preparing himself to inherit from her in the face of association with a weak, compromise candidate Mizukage, as well as potential rivals within the clan with a better claim by blood in the unlikely event that Kurosawa had kids. Now, he's got that position well ahead of schedule, and he has no idea what to prepare for with Lord Utakata, and most importantly, he just doesn't have the independent power base to fight off the elders who want to make him a figurehead—not that different from Hinata's problem, actually.
"So, naturally, I've lent him mine."
"Meaning what, exactly?"
"Originally, I wanted to poach him for the AMI," Ami said, "but we couldn't have Kurosawa focus too much on our operations when we were just starting out, if only because it would have exposed what we were doing with Lord Utakata. Trying to steal Kurosawa's heir from under her nose would have crossed a big red line. Still, half his age group were members in one form or another, so it's not like he could avoid exposure. Long story short, we made him the same offer that Kurosawa had been too arrogant to take. We'll back him as Mizukage—which is to say, Lord Utakata's legitimate successor; Lord Utakata himself is a dream come true for the AMI—if he follows our ideals of a better, freer Mist. The last thing we want is Lord Utakata's reforms being undone by some conservative twerp a few decades down the line. Right now, that means backing him as clan head until his position's stable.
"There's no way to tell, at chūnin level, whether Hanzō is going to ascend past jōnin and to the realms of true Kage power by the time the hat's available. I suspect he's more talented than Ren is, at any rate. On the other hand, if I have my way, by the time he's ready to take the hat, leadership won't mean being able to punch the hardest anymore. One of the big lessons I'm learning now is that short-term games and long-term games are synergistic, and if you want to go up to the next level, you need to figure out how to make them work together.
"I doubt Hanzō is that fond of you. He knows you the way the Kurosawa know you, as a traitor's son who turned out to be an even bigger traitor, and you humiliating them in the Chūnin Exams didn't earn you any love either. Still, if you're useful, he'll use you, and he's got enough mental flexibility to change his mind about you given the right evidence. Just don't let your guard down. A properly-trained Kurosawa can make you believe anything about themselves, and he has access to all the training there is."
"Thanks, Ami," Hazō said. "That's really helpful, if a little terrifying in regard to your ambitions."
"I'm an optimiser born and bred," Ami said, "and I'm strongest where I have people I trust to feed me ideas. The right idea can be turned into anything if you optimise hard enough. My boys in Mist were perfect for that; we grew up together and I got to shape them into exactly what I needed. So yeah, Mist is where you see my A-game."
"And what was founding the KEI, a side hobby?"
"The KEI has the person I trust most in the world, Hazō," Ami said, putting an arm around Kei. Kei, never one for public displays of affection, leaned into it unselfconsciously. "Also, it's not the same, but Naruto is a simple person, deep down, and loyal to his friends. People who are easy to predict are easy to trust.
"The idea of the KEI is easy. You look at a thing that's so broken a blind man would cringe at the sight of it, and it just begs for optimisation."
Hazō nodded. In his case, the thing was the entire world.
"For the reality of it, I had to choose the right people. Kei isn't there just out of nepotism, or for her abilities, or her political connections. Naruto isn't just there because it was the optimal way to get legitimacy. There's always a deeper reason.
"Except when I do stuff just to see what happens, which is quite often," she added. "If you were hoping for actionable insights, it'll take more than chestnut cake. Which is not to say I don't want more chestnut cake. After the length of time I've had to subsist on Mist field rations, I am quite prepared to spend the next two weeks eating even in my sleep."
"More cake," Hazō agreed. For all the complexities of their relationship, there were some matters in which they saw perfectly eye to eye.
-o-
Step One is complete. I look forward to hearing your ideas for Step Two. Thank you for the lovely dinner. ^_^
-o-
You have received 3 + 1 (Brevity) + 1 (Fun-to-write) = 5 XP.
Chapter 504: The Ministry of Agriculture, Reinvigoration, and Infrastructure
"My Lord Hokage, Lords and Ladies, good morning," Mari said, spreading her smile across the Council chamber. "Thank you for inviting me. A quick summary so you know what to expect: I'm going to tell you a lot of things that you already know about the problems that Leaf is currently facing. I'm then going to tell you a bunch more things that you already know related to how Leaf's institutions work. Once all that groundwork is laid, I'm going to move on to the sexy stuff, like how we can triple Leaf's ninja population in ten years, spread the Will of Fire across the Elemental Nations, and make everyone at this table richer than Koresus."
It was amazing how nuanced a snort could be. Lord Hagface was capable of one that clearly conveyed what an idiot Mari was. Lady Inuzuka's was amused at Mari's hard-charging optimism and humor. Tsunade's was doubtful and impatient.
Hazō watched Mari with carefully-suppressed glee. A quick glance around the room showed that the snorting had been positive overall. Clan Heads who had been looking bored or reaching for their tea were now intrigued, and the Clan Heads who had been moderately hostile were now less so. (The Clan Head who had been outright hostile hadn't visibly changed his position except to lean back in his chair and cross his arms like a petulant child. By the Sage, how did that guy end up the head of a voting clan?!) The KEI representative was clearly unsure what the impact of such ninja growth would be on his organization.
"With your permission, Lord Hokage?"
Asuma sipped his tea with one hand and made a 'the floor is yours' gesture with the other.
"Thank you, sir." She smiled and nodded, then turned to face the table as a whole. "As promised, let's do the bad parts first.
"We learned yesterday how badly Leaf's ninja forces have been mauled by the war and the various events of the last two years. Now, the clans will restore themselves in time," she said. "Likewise, the membership rolls of the KEI will grow in the normal course of events. Unfortunately, I'm sure that Lord Nara can confirm that recent events have not only reduced our current ninja population, they have reduced the rate at which our ninja population will increase."
She looked around in exaggerated search for eavesdroppers, then leaned forward and lowered her voice to a stage whisper. "If you examine the record, it turns out... Ninja are mostly born to ninja." She straightened, chuckling. "Knowledge drop, I know. Still, it's important. The majority of ninja in Leaf were born to clan ninja, because the children of ninja/ninja pairings are essentially always ninja. A ninja/civilian pairing produces ninja children more often than not. Civilian/civilian pairings only very occasionally produce children with chakra systems that are capable of supporting a ninja career. This is a problem, because Leaf's ninja forces have been decimated several times over. Not only does that mean fewer ninja on the front line to defend the nation, it means fewer ninja to sire and bear the next generation of ninja children.
"That's leaving aside the institutional memory and experience that has been lost," she continued. "It's not enough to have children capable of being ninja, we also need to have people who can train them in the ninja arts and imbue them with the Will of Fire. Without the training they cannot function as ninja. Without the Will of Fire they won't function as ninja. That means our education and training systems are critical.
"Until now, ninja training has been stratified. Students go to the Academy, which is geared for a few hundred students per year. After they leave at the end of the day, they go home. The clan children train with their family members. The clanless children help their parents with their jobs, squeezing out practice time where they can find it."
The KEI representative and Lady Kei shifted in their seats, mouths tight in annoyance.
"After graduation, new genin are divided into squads based on their Academy achievements." And on who their families were, but that part was not to be said aloud. "The squads made up of the very best students receive jōnin leaders who stay with them up until they are promoted to chūnin. The rest of the squads receive chūnin leaders.
"This system has worked extremely well for Leaf up until now," Mari said. "Indeed, this is the system that built Leaf into the most powerful of the Ninja Villages, as evidenced by the fact that we hold essentially all of the best land on this continent.
"The problem is that it's based on a set of assumptions that no longer apply. It was laid down in a time when the Academy generally matriculated 500 to 600 new students each year and graduated around 250. There were 50 or 60 jōnin and 400 chūnin, meaning that every Academy graduate could be confident in having an assigned sensei.
"That no longer applies. We have fewer than a dozen jōnin and only 243 surviving chūnin, some of whom are on medical stand-down and some of whom are required for home-front duties such as teaching at the Academy, seal or technique research, handling of deeply classified documents, and so on. We simply don't have the staff to be giving each squad its own instructor anymore, especially not if we're going to be growing at the rate we want. That's leaving aside the fact that the Academy was destroyed, along with most of the teaching resources and some of the senior teachers and administrators." She looked soberly around the room. "We want to rebuild our numbers as quickly as possible, but even if we had an unlimited number of possibles—hold that thought, because we're coming back to it—even if we had unlimited inflow of students, the Academy couldn't handle that many students and we couldn't mentor them afterwards.
"We just create larger squads," Lord Hagoromo said impatiently.
"It's possible that could work," Mari said, in a voice that made it clear that it wasn't possible. "However, the reason we use teams of three is because it provides a good balance between having enough combat power on a squad to render the squad survivable while also having enough squads to let Leaf project force to multiple places at a time. Increasing squad size feeds back into the problem I was mentioning earlier of stratified instruction: A ninja instructor can only handle a small number of students at a time. It's a question of focused attention. The larger the squad, the less individual training each member receives.
"Right now, clan children receive more training than clanless children simply because the clan children have adult ninja around them at all times from whom to learn. Clanless do not have that extra cadre and thus they receive fewer hours of instruction over the course of their time in the Academy. Receiving fewer hours of training means that clanless ninja have a higher death rate. Each of those deaths is a tragedy to their friends and family. Each of those deaths is a loss to Leaf's military power. And every single one of those deaths is one less potential parent for the next generation, one less potential trainer to pass on their experience."
She paused, waiting to see if he was going to continue the debate, then nodded and moved on.
"That's the military side of things. Let's move on to the domestic. A lot of our civilians have been killed, thereby reducing the production of basic resources such as lumber, charcoal, and metals, as well as access to finished products such as repairs to our houses, heat for our homes, and kunai for our soldiers."
"My lovely wife does seem to go through the things quickly," Shikamaru added drily, shooting an amused glance at Kei who sat to his right. She raised one eyebrow at him and failed to look amused in turn. In fact, although an outsider would have seen only the regulation Mori/Nara stone face, Hazō knew her well enough to recognize the storm of emotions she was having at simply being in the same room as Mari. Hazō could only speculate what the conversation must have been like at the Nara residence this morning.
"Beloved wife, Mari will be presenting to the Council this morning. I expect you to be at my right."
"Beloved husband, although nothing gives me greater pleasure than to sit at your side while gazing with adoring cow eyes upon the handsome radiance of your countenance, I plead that you not force me to this task, because the presence of That Woman upsets me in ways that are beyond what can be sustained by such a fragile flower as myself."
"Although I care deeply about you, my tasty little sweet potato, and I understand your completely reasonable and well-considered rage and betrayal at a loved one putting herself in major risk, and you in very slight risk, in order to prevent the almost-certain death of the brother for whom you have repeatedly placed yourself at risk by fighting beside him, and yes I recognize that the grammar of this sentence renders it appropriate for immediate execution, yet still I must insist. I recognize it as a great sacrifice on your part to act like the grownup politician that a Clan Lady has a responsibility to be, yet I have great confidence in your ability to suspend your ridiculous yet simultaneously adorably quirky snit for an hour or so. You are my heir and it is important for you to learn how to be in a room with someone you loathe without attempting to terrify and/or murder them. You know, just in case you ever need to take my seat at the Council table."
"Schnookums, don't say such awful things! The only way I should be called upon to take your seat would be for you to...to...alas, my tongue can barely form such horrific words! The only way for me to take your seat would be for you to die and, were this incredibly unlikely event to occur, then lo, my heart should break and I would race after you through the tunnel of darkness and behind the dark veils of death within that darkest day of darkness! Nay, within the very hour would I follow thee!"
On second thought, the conversation had probably been nothing like that.
Also, if he was being fair then Kei's risk had been higher than 'very slight' and her reactions, while emotional and not entirely reasonable, weren't completely unwarranted either. Regardless, Kei was here and not throwing knives or making the air feel cold, so he would call it a win.
Mari smiled and nodded acknowledgement to Shikamaru without making eye contact with Kei.
"As do most of our forces," Mari continued smoothly. "With military and domestic addressed, let's turn our gazes abroad. This new 'AMITY' venture that Mori created is presenting us with some opportunities alongside the restrictions. On the one hand, we are prevented from taking military action against Rock in repayment for the harm they've caused us.
"Of course, we're not going to let Rock get away with what they did, right?" Grim nods went around the table. "If this new effort succeeds and brings peace to the entire Elemental Nations for the first time in history, we can take advantage of that. We can strangle their economy and leave them as starving paupers dependent on our good will. While we're doing that, we can spread the Will of Fire into their nation until their civilians and even their ninja decide to move to Leaf."
She paused for the startled laughter, then bared her teeth in a most unfriendly smile.
"My Lord, My Ladies, you should not laugh. I am deadly serious. Mori Ami was able to convince two Kage to let her renationalize from Mist to Leaf. That precedent is now set and we should be sure that everyone attending the AMITY is quietly made aware of it. Oh, they'll cluck like startled chickens and wag their fingers. They'll probably even say that we're terrible people, or morally depraved, or...I dunno, some damn thing." She shrugged at the unimportance of it all.
"They can fuss all they want, but think what the effect will be once the word spreads to all the ninja of their home villages: Leaf is better than the other villages. We are so much better that Mori moved the heavens and the earth in order to come here. Having done that, she is not being locked in some basement somewhere, carefully surveilled by ANBU. No, she is being treated with respect and placed in a position of honor and importance. She is, in short, being allowed to earn her place, treated no better and no worse than anyone else."
The quality of the silence changed.
"The Seventh Path trade network that Hazō created gives Leaf access to goods that are available nowhere in our world, the spider silk being only the latest example. Not only does it provide us a monopoly on these goods, but it allows us to effectively teleport messages and goods across the continent in seconds, giving us a much shorter command-and-control loop as well as the ability to quickly take advantage of economic opportunities that others couldn't. Imagine: Rock sends a merchant and a ninja bodyguard to Cloud at the same time as Leaf does, except our ninja is a Summoner. Both merchants sell what they brought and then they look around to find out which goods are selling well and which are selling poorly. Armed with that information, the Rock team needs to go home and assemble a cargo. The Leaf merchant simply relays a message through the Seventh Path and within the hour they have a stack of storage scrolls filled with valuable products. Two weeks later, the Rock merchant returns to find that they have no market for their goods because Leaf already made those sales.
"Once we have strangled Rock enough, once enough of their people have learned about Leaf's superior lifestyle and philosophy, what will happen? Their ninja will start quietly approaching us, asking to immigrate. Oh, it won't be for years and it will be a trickle at first, but it will grow.
"Obviously, these people will need to be vetted thoroughly. Imagine what happens if we do it gently—we bring them into Leaf, we give them comfortable quarters while the vetting happens, perhaps we even let them take some supervised trips around the city." She mimed at being a first-time visitor to Leaf, gazing around in wonderment. After a moment she dropped the act and shrugged. "Yes, some of them will be false, sent as spies. We should not kill them. We should—"
"We are familiar with Jiraiya's principles," Lady Amori said sharply. "Enemy spies are treasure and should be treated as such. Keep them, give them posts within the bureaucracy, and use them to feed false information to their masters, etc etc."
Mari shook her head. "With respect, Lady Amori: no. In this case it is far better to send them home. We don't want them passing bits of carefully-curated military information that disappears into the enemy equivalent of the Tower archive. We want them walking the streets of Cloud and the tunnels of Rock, talking about what marvels they saw during their time in Leaf. Talking about how friendly and respectful her people were. How much cleaner and more beautiful and richer the city is than theirs. They'll be back eventually, this time for true. The more often that happens the more sincere applications we will have and the more the Tsuchikage's heart will marinate in helpless rage."
Laughter had shifted to sharp interest.
"So," Mari said, clapping her hands. "Let's recap: Leaf is short on ninja. Our replacement rate is reduced because we don't have enough people to serve as parents and squad leaders. Our training systems, while excellent within the paradigm they were created for, are now being faced with a set of challenges they weren't intended to handle. The AMITY, if it works, will give us military cover so that we can utterly destroy Rock and quietly subsume the rest of the Elemental Nations over the next ten or twenty years—but only if we have the economic power and vision to take advantage of the opportunity. How do we resolve all this?
"Let's talk about a new organization: the Ministry for Agriculture, Reinvigoration, and Infrastructure."
"What does 'ministry' mean?" Hazō had asked, the night before when Mari was using him as the audience for her briefing slash practice session.
"It's a made-up word. When you minister to someone it means you're taking care of them, usually because they're sick. Right now, the Land of Fire is sick and we are going to minister to it."
"You just needed to make the name work, didn't you?"
She looked down her nose at him and sniffed. "I have no idea what you mean." After a moment she gave up the pretense and grinned. "Yes. It's blatantly obvious and self-aggrandizing and normally I wouldn't do it. Honestly, I expect that it will work against us. Still, this organization has a lot of purposes, and one of them is to make it harder for Ms Psycho to follow through on trying to kill us the next time she decides to uncharitably interpret our interactions with Kei. Naming it like this is a direct challenge to her and I want her to know it."
"Seems like a lot of effort just to send a signal."
"Like I said, many purposes. Wealth, power, Uplift, intelligence gathering, the ability to squeeze the life out of the Hagoromo or anyone else who pisses us off—well, I suppose that last one is covered under 'power', but it bears mentioning. Anyway, lots of different things."
"The Ministry is directed by myself and my co-Ministers," Mari said, gesturing to the two civilian men who bracketed her one step back. A giant easel stood behind the three of them and a large sheet of paper, faced away from the Council members, leaned up against its front legs. Most people who needed to talk to the Council but weren't on it would have stood at the foot of the table where it was easy for everyone to see them. Mari and her cohort were standing on the west side of the table, the one closest to the door. The Council members along that side had needed to turn their chairs around to see her.
"Good morning," said the man to her left, bowing deeply. "I am Sugawara Aito." Hazō recognized him; he was the one who had sold the Gōketsu his iron mine on the border of River.
"And I am Tanaka Kiyomoto," the other man said. He was the Master of Chambers for Leaf's Merchant Council, one of the few civilians that even the most conservative clan head needed to treat well.
"So. What do we do?" Mari asked. She looked around the room, letting the problem hang over their heads for an instant. "Answer: We increase the population of Fire in order to increase our ninja forces, we evolve the way we provide ninja training, and we shift our focus from military conflict to economic conquest."
"Lady Gōketsu," Shino said carefully. "When you say that we increase the population of ninja, it sounds like you are suggesting a ninja breeding program such as Mist was rumored to have. Are you about to say that female ninja should be removed from the field and encouraged or required to have as many children as possible?"
Mari shook her head and raised both hands in preemptive surrender. "Absolutely not. Not only are there moral issues with that but the result would be to stratify women into an underclass, coddled pets who cannot be allowed to take any risks. That would reduce women to nothing but their reproductive abilities. At that point, why should they be educated? Should they be restricted to the clan compound at all times, allowed out only under male escort?" She gestured around the table at the multiple Clan Ladies at the table. "I think if you look at the people around this table, you'll find that Leaf's women have a great deal to contribute in every field. As soldiers, as politicians, as artists...as terrifyingly grouchy yet inspirational legends." The last came with a nod and a small smile to Lady Tsunade, who grunted in response. "No. I am absolutely opposed to anything that looks like a breeding program."
"Then what is your suggestion for growing the rate at which Leaf's ninja population grows?"
"Simple. We grow the civilian population."
Everyone blinked. Shikamaru leaned forward, elbows on the table and fingers interlaced. Tsunade went "Hah!" and slapped the table in approval.
"Civilian/civilian couples produce ninja at a very low rate," Mari continued. "What is the rate? No one knows. I tried to figure it out by using the tax rolls as census data, then crossing that with the Academy's admission intake for the last ten years. Unfortunately, the Academy records are not available due to Rock's..." She struggled to find a word that would encompass her feelings, then gave up and shrugged. "Rock's attack. Still, let's guess. Perhaps one in a hundred civilian children have the potential to become ninja? One in fifty? It's hard to say. Leaf does not aggressively recruit from the hinterlands of Fire so we don't know how many are born but go unnoticed."
"Do you really think it's one in fifty?"
"Heck no. Honestly, I'll be pleasantly surprised if it ends up being as high as one in a hundred. Doesn't matter, because the people in that room aren't going to know either. By starting with one in a hundred and then going up to one in fifty they will subconsciously take away the idea that one in a hundred is the pessimistic figure and that it's likely higher than that."
"Lords and Ladies, there are over 300,000 civilians in Fire. Most civilians in the countryside have a child every year, because they need workers on the farms and they know that more than half of their children will die before they can walk. That's roughly 150,000 births each year. If 1 in 100 of them are potential ninja, that's 1500 genin candidates every year. At the height of its power, Leaf had 1500 ninja total."
"You're suggesting that we fill Leaf's ranks almost entirely with clanless born in the countryside?" Lord Motoyoshi asked, lips pursed. "The clans would be rendered irrelevant." He carefully ignored the cat-with-creamy-whiskers smile of the KEI representative down the table.
"No sir. I'm suggesting that we grow both the KEI and the clans. First, we invest in the Will of Fire through an aggressive policy of securing the life and health of the civilian population. This will lead to a population explosion and, as the number of civilians increases, so will the number of new civilian-born ninja candidates."
She nodded to Kei and then to Naruto, the two KEI Coordinators in the room. "This is going to have serious impact on Leaf's political structure. It's rude to say it that bluntly, but Leaf is facing too large a crisis for us to be less than forthright with one another as we jointly work to fix things. On the one hand, the KEI will be receiving an enormous number of new members. On the other hand, we need to regrow the clans as well, and that means adoptions. There are two opposed forces here; on the one hand, the Clan Heads are going to want to adopt only the best and the brightest, causing a 'brain drain' away from the KEI. That's bad; the KEI is too important to be treated like that.
"My suggestion would be to tweak Hazō's adoption-ticket system: if a clan would like to have a ninja join their clan then they need to get the person's consent in advance and spend an adoption ticket. The difference is that the KEI becomes the source of adoption tickets, not the Tower."
Asuma's eyebrow went up. "Excuse me? That—" He broke off and cocked his head in thought. "Hm."
"Asuma?" Tsunade asked.
"I started to object and then I realized I had no need to," Asuma said. "The Tower has a right and a duty to ensure that its ninja are treated well, that they are well trained and fit for service, and that their skills and their lives are used in the best possible service to the Will of Fire. Nothing in that says that we need to care which clan a ninja belongs to or doesn't belong to."
"Wait, you seriously think he'll go for that?" Hazō demanded. "He's not going to want to set the precedent of giving away pieces of the Tower's authority. Plus, if he tries it then the clans will take him out behind the woodshed."
"So, what, if we want to adopt a candidate who wants to be adopted, we need to get the approval of this...organization?" Lord Kurusu said.
"Pretty much," Mari said cheerfully. "Even if you're adopting from another clan to your own, even if someone is marrying from one clan to another, you still need a ticket. You could buy an existing one from another clan or you could pay the KEI to create a new one for you, either way. They would have the right to print as many additional tickets as they want and sell them for whatever rate seems best. Kei, Naruto, if you'd be willing to take a suggestion: have training hours be part of the price. The clans can send their jōnin down to train appropriate students twice a week, or add one of your members to a squad run by one of their chūnin, or whatever. Be creative. You will be in prime position to implement new educational initiatives, so do it."
"Lord Hokage, surely you aren't seriously considering this?" Lady Amori asked, appalled. "I have no objection to the KEI as an organization, but giving them the right to essentially veto any adoption or marriage between clans is madness!"
"It does seem a bit extreme," Asuma said slowly. "Although I believe the issue can be resolved simply by requiring that the KEI distribute a certain number of tickets to each clan at the start of the year and then setting up rules to ensure that the sales are fair and unbiased." He nodded thoughtfully. "Yes. There's a lot more work to be done on this topic but the basic idea is sound and what's left is details. I'm not committing to it either for or against, but I want to think about it. Let's table it and move on. Lady Gōketsu?"
"He'll go for it like Kagome for chocolate. Why wouldn't he? It gets some paperwork hassle off his desk and it builds up the power of the KEI so that they can serve as a meaningful counterweight to the power of the clans. Asuma has a very weak mandate among the clans, but he's popular with the KEI ninja in general and with the KEI coordinators in particular. Anything that builds them up is in his favor." She made a moue. "Granted, it might also build up Ami's power, but by very publicly claiming the idea and championing it I can blunt the impact of that."
"It 'might' build up her power?"
"Yeah, might. Asuma could, if he wanted to, steal the KEI out from under Ami. He keeps her busy running around the countryside on AMITY business while he welds the organization more firmly to him. If he does that then she gets marginalized. If he doesn't then Ami's power will increase alongside the power of the KEI.
"On the other hand, the KEI have now been publicly called out to improve the educational system. That puts Ami, Kei, and Shikamaru in prime position to fix things with Leaf's schools. Kei will know to talk to Kagome for an expert opinion that is also an outside perspective, so that makes him happy and brings her back to the family a little bit more, gives us more of a chance at mending things with her. Asuma gets an improved school system but the Tower has none of their own credit tied up in it. If Ami tries something—either her own idea or something he suggested—it's on her and not him if it backfires. Which, granted, is another of those two-sided things. I'm giving her more influence over Leaf's ninja education, which increases her power. On the other hand, I'm also putting her under a spotlight where any underperformance or mistake will be highly visible, and setting her up for confrontation with the Clan Heads. They're not going to enjoy having to go, hat in hand, to a woman much younger than them in order to get the ninja power that they desperately need. Especially not when she's a foreigner, which is going to rub the Hags up like a wire brush on the taint."
"Can't she fob that off on Kei or Naruto? Or set up some kind of bureaucracy?"
"Eh." She waggled her hand. "Setting up a bureaucracy will handle the day-to-day stuff, but if Lord Hagface wants a ticket and is told no then he's going to demand to speak to a Coordinator. From what I've seen, Naruto doesn't have the temperament for that kind of deskwork on the regular. Not yet, anyway. It's one of the reasons he wasn't ready to be Hokage at the last election. Kei has the temperament but she's likely to get steamrolled by some of the pushier Clan Heads. You know her—she's good at wheeling and dealing when everyone is playing fair, but she gets rattled when the other person isn't working in good faith, and the only people who are going to end up negotiating for tickets with a Coordinator are the ones who aren't working in good faith. In a situation like that, she'll either give away too much value or she'll do something that gives the frustrated customer the right to go to the Hokage for redress, which takes away the moral authority of the KEI. Ami will know all that as well as I do and will try to keep Kei away from it for the most part. No, Ami will pass most of it off but it will still tie up a few hours a month."
She shook her head. "There's definitely pros and cons to this. It will make her more powerful, which means more capable of sticking a knife in one of us the next time she decides we were mean to Kei. On the other hand, she'll need to spend at least some of her time on deskwork, as well as creating and watching over school programs to ensure that they're working smoothly and there's no teachers messing about with the kids or anything like that." She shrugged. "Not sure it's a win overall, but we'll see. Plus, it really will be good for Leaf."
"Yes, My Lord. All right, moving on. We've talked about the end goal: increasing the number of ninja in Leaf and finding a way to ensure that both the clans and the KEI benefit from this. Let's talk about how we get there.
"Civilians die for a number of reasons. Dangerous flora and fauna. Starvation and thirst. Bad weather. Disease. We can solve most of these problems very easily." She gestured to Tsunade. "Lady Tsunade once remarked that the best way to help civilians would be to build walls. So, the Ministry hired out the creation of a new technique. Aito?"
"Thank you, Madam Minister," Aito said, struggling and failing to hide his nervousness. "Lords, Ladies, several months ago the newly-formed Ministry hired Chūnin Haruhisa to create the Earth Element: Massive and Rapid Infrastructure technique. We would like to formally and publicly state in front of all of you, and in front of the KEI Coordinators in particular, that Chūnin Haruhisa did a superb job and we...uh, the Ministers are extremely pleased with the results." The poor man was floundering; there were small beads of sweat around his temples despite the cool temperature in the room.
"Cute name. Another signal?"
"No, this one was in fact a bit of self-aggrandizing whimsy. I'm allowed to be a hypocrite occasionally."
"This technique is derived from the Earth Element: Multiple Earth Wall. We can, uh, use it to construct walls for villages."
"Aito, if I may interrupt for just one moment," Mari said. "I should probably mention that the technique has significant differences as compared to its ancestor. The Multiple Earth Wall can produce walls at any angle from any surface that is stone or Earth Element. In particular, it's possible to create a Multiple Earth Wall on top of another Multiple Earth Wall in order to build arbitrarily high. It can generate walls quickly enough to be useful in battle. On the other hand, it generates a relatively small amount of wall per casting.
"The Massive and Rapid Infrastructure technique generates much larger walls—three meters above ground, five meters below, one meter thick. The walls are always vertical regardless of the slope of the ground on which they are created. They must be cast atop stone or Earth-Element material, but not atop material created by itself, meaning that it can't be used to make walls higher than its design, although it can be used to make them thicker. It is also quite slow to operate and causes splitting headaches if terminated improperly. On the other hand, it can create hundreds of yards of wall per casting if given sufficient chakra."
"What."
"What?"
"What the fuck?"
"Sorry, not with family."
"You just went and...hired it done."
"I mean...yeah?"
"Without talking to me?"
"Would you have said yes?"
"Well, obviously, but..."
She shrugged. "Then what's the problem?"
Hazō felt like there were so very many problems, but he couldn't quite figure them out. "What even made you think of this?"
"What do you mean 'what made me think of this'? You, you dimwit. Half of what the Ministry is doing is stuff that you've been talking about on and off since we met. You've just been a little busy so I decided to do it for you."
"Using this technique will allow us to quickly place walls around every civilian village in Fire, including their fields," Tanaka said. "After speaking with a few recent immigrants, we expect that this will cut rural deaths by somewhere between twenty and forty percent."
"That is a large variance," Shikamaru noted.
"It is, but it's difficult to get good data. Most of the farmers are illiterate and innumerate. Getting actual data out of them required paying them to provide the names of everyone in their village, then detail which ones had died and of what. Obviously, there's a lot of points of failure, starting with the person's memory."
"Have you tried comparing different people's information regarding the same town?" Lady Inuzuka asked. "Our trackers do that."
Tanaka nodded respectfully. "Ma'am, we have. That's why I'm confident enough to say that it's twenty to forty percent instead of ten to eighty."
"Hm."
"Once the technique was created," Tanaka said, "we found three Leaf chūnin with the Earth element and reasonable chakra reserves. They agreed, in principle, to a series of missions building walls around Fire's civilian villages." He grimaced. "Unfortunately, all three of them died in the opening weeks of the war. Fortunately, we found a replacement, Gotoda Bunji. He was able to learn the technique on his rest days."
"We also surveyed a series of Leaf villages and chose one as a prototype for advanced development," Sugawara said. "The Ministry plans to do basic development across all of Fire as quickly as possible. That means putting a wall around the village and its fields, ensuring that they have an adequate water supply—we hired the development of a dowsing jutsu for that—coordinating with the Nara Future Foundation in order to bring in teachers and tradesmen to offer education, and organizing regular till'n'fill missions and trade missions."
"We will also be conducting a thorough census while we do this," Mari said. "If we put a Hyūga in each of the missions then we'll be able to locate every ninja candidate in the Land of Fire. That will increase class intake at the Academy and increase tax revenue come harvest time."
"Which brings us back to the prototype concept," Sugawara said. The small man had clearly braced himself; his speech was firmer and he was making more eye contact. "Lords and Ladies, the single most important thing Leaf could do to grow the civilian population would be to reduce taxes and provide discretionary funds for local development."
"I thought the goal was to grow Leaf's economy?" Shino asked. "How are we supposed to do that if we're reducing taxes? We won't have the goods to trade."
"My Lord, I am a hill daimyo from the border of River, as was my father and my father's father and his father before him. Every year, 95% of what we produce beyond basic subsistence is taken in tax. We have enough to eat, barely, but there is never enough extra to do anything with. For example, we make most of our money on nut flour, but we need to hull the nuts and grind them by hand and there aren't enough hands in the village to grind the entire crop of nuts before they go bad. With a proper waterwheel we could install an automatic mill which would allow us to enormously increase our output. That would mean more nut cake, nut candy, and nut flour for Leaf, but it would require us to have the money to buy what we need."
"So approach one of us for a partnership," Lady Inuzuka said. "That's the way it works. That's the way it's always worked, and Leaf is rich and successful for it."
"It does indeed work," Mari said, nodding. "But there are some inefficiencies in the system. It's limited by the number of meetings that the Clan Heads can take, by the amount of our assets that are liquid at any given time, and the ability of the local lord to travel to Leaf in order to make the pitch. Suppose that Aito had simply had the money in his pocket ten years ago? He would be rich and we would be richer. Leaf would have massive amounts of very tasty nut flour to use in our own bakeries with plenty left over to sell to other nations as a way of getting our ninja inside their walls to surveil the place."
"Hm." Lady Inuzuka leaned back, rubbing her lip and thinking.
"Putting it more bluntly," Mari said, "if we reduce the tax rate, I expect that we will see total tax revenues go up."
Cries of "What?!" went around the table.
"Mari, that makes no sense," Asuma said. "If you decrease taxes then you get less taxes."
Mari turned to the easel and lifted up the huge sheet of paper, placing it on the stand so that everyone could see it.
Hazō froze. "Mari," he said, his voice very calm. "Why do you have one-third of a Rafu selector on that sheet?"
"A what now?"
Chills went down his spine. "That diagram is the lower third of a common seal element known as a Rafu selector. It's missing some very important parts. Why do you have it?"
She looked at the drawing in surprise. "Huh. Didn't know that—well, obviously, since I know squat about sealing. Nah, this is just a prop to make my point that pigs get fat and hogs get slaughtered."
"Aren't pigs and hogs the same animal?"
"It's a metaphor, Hazō. Work with me."
"This is a visual aid," Mari explained, pointing to the design. "It's not intended to convey specifics, merely the basic concept. This vertical line represents various potential tax rates. This horizontal line represents the actual amount of tax revenue collected, and the curved line represents how the two map to one another. For example, if the tax rate is zero then obviously we collect no taxes." She pointed to the lower-left corner where all three lines came together, then slid her finger up to the top where the curved line and the vertical line met again. "Of course, if the tax rate is 100% then we also collect no revenue, because all of the farmers starved to death the previous year.
"Right now we take 95% after subsistence and we get this much." She slid her finger along the curve, moving down and to the right. "On the other hand, Aito already explained that if we reduced taxes slightly then his people would be able to generate far more." She moved her finger farther down the curve, indicating the decrease in tax rate and increase in revenue. She smiled at the room, making eye contact with various people in turn. "I'm sure that everyone here has, at some point, stolen something off their mother's cooling trays. We all know that it's better to get a slice of a very large pie than all of a very small tart. Yes, there is a point at which lowering taxes reduces revenue instead of increasing it"—she pointed to where the curve trended inward again—"but that point is nowhere near where we are.
"We want to be right here." She put her finger on the dot at the outermost point of the curve and smudged it around a bit. "I don't know what the exact numbers are, but I feel certain that we can figure it out."
"Okay, fine, it's a metaphor. If it's not a Rafu selector then why does it look like an unrealistically giant breast?"
"Because most of the Council are men, and men get stupid and compliant when they're thinking about boobs."
"The Ministry had intended to use Kushida Crossing as our initial prototype community," Tanaka said. "Unfortunately, it was eradicated by those Rock bastards in their opening attack." His jaw clenched but he forced himself to relax. "Fortunately, we found another choice.
"The village of Stone Faces was named for some local rock formations that look vaguely like faces when seen from the proper angle. It was a large and successful community that was targeted by Rock at the start of the war. 75% of the buildings were destroyed and half the population was killed, leaving 103 survivors, of whom 41 are able-bodied and of working age. The village had a wooden palisade but it was burned down. The Ministry plans to make the following investments:
"First, we will hire a mission to have Gotoda and two genin replace the palisade with a large stone wall via the Massive and Rapid Infrastructure technique. This will likely take three to four days, given the chakra demands, hence why we are sending two genin as backup for when Gotoda is chakra-depleted.
"Second, the Ministry will send a basic development package of goods including food and supplies, along with a team of civilian experts and Nara Future Foundation experts to help rebuild and improve the village while also providing those who live there with skill training.
"Third, we intend to provide a modest stipend for every member of the community regardless of age or ability to work. This will give them the discretionary resources to invest in waterwheels, or whatever else they might need, without needing to trek back to Leaf and seek an audience with a Clan Head. It will also incentivize having children, which means more ninja going forward.
"All of this will be paid for from the Ministry Investment Fund and will not cost anyone here anything.
"Finally, we ask the Tower to forego taxes on Stone Faces this year and to reduce their taxes to 50% for the next 10 years."
"We are so confident that this will work that we're willing to bet on it," Mari said. "We've gone through the tax rolls and figured out the average tax revenue generated by Stone Faces from 1060-1070. If the Tower is willing to offer the tax relief that we've requested then the Ministry will ensure that the Tower loses nothing from it. In years where they generate less than the average, the Ministry will make up the difference from the MIF. In years where they generate more, the excess will go into the MIF to be spent on covering the Ministry's costs and developing other towns."
"...covering the Ministry's costs?" Hazō repeated. One eyebrow rose. "Care to offer some specifics?"
"Salaries and profit sharing for the Ministers, to start. I'm not doing this purely out of the goodness of my heart. I intend for the Gōketsu to get stinking rich off it."
"You sound very confident," Hinata said, breaking her silence for the first time.
"I am," Mari replied. She looked around at the audience, then glanced at the ceiling as she riffled through her mental presentation notes. Finally she nodded. "This concludes our presentation on the Ministry of Agriculture, Reinvigoration, and Infrastructure. Lord Hokage, your thoughts?"
Asuma has nothing to lose and much to gain, so he's going to say yes. The question is how enthusiastic he is. Let's find out.
Mari, Presence: ? + tag "Thoroughly Prepared" + tag "The Merchant Council Is Convinced" + invoke ? + invoke ? - 3 (dice; 1 FP spent on rerolling a -6): ?
Asuma, Presence: ??? - 3 (dice): ?
Asuma studied the chart for a moment, drumming his fingers in thought. "All right," he said at last. "The census and identification of ninja candidates makes sense. Till'n'fill missions to build walls for all the towns makes sense. We'll do those. As to this tax business...I'm not convinced but I'm not disbelieving either. The experiment with Stone Faces is inexpensive but won't be completely clear for years. We don't have years. We need to get out in front of whatever the AMITY ends up accomplishing."
He fell silent for a moment, then nodded. "This year and next, the tax rate across the Land of Fire will be 85% after subsistence."
Quiet sounds of horror went around the table as various Clan Heads foresaw their income taking a hit.
Asuma raised a hand, looking down the length of the table. "Yes, this means less money to divide between Tower and clans. I will be investing my personal funds and Tower discretionary funds to cover the lost revenue so the clans don't get pinched. Each of you has a choice: you may receive your full stipend or you may choose to forego some of it. If you do, it will be treated as an investment. Three years from now, if the total tax revenue across Fire has been higher than the average, the extra money will be divided per stirpes among those who invested, up to five times the money lost from your stipends."
He turned back to Mari. "None of this happens until after the war is done, however. I'm not having our ninja running around the country in penny packets on non-essential missions and spending days chakra-exhausted while out in the field."
She bowed deeply. "Thank you, Lord Hokage."
Author's Note: The graph that Mari used for her display is, of course, the Laffer curve, named for the economist Arthur Laffer. In most economics books it's drawn with tax rate on the x-axis and revenue on the y-axis so that the curve goes up, but when Laffer invented it he was a professor. He drew it as described here, with the curve going to the right, specifically (quoting from distant memory) "because it makes my male students pay attention."
XP AWARD: 0 (There was no voting because voting remained closed after the last update.)
Brevity XP: 0 (Ditto.)
"GM had fun" XP: 5
It is now about 11am. You are back at the Gōketsu estate with Mari and the rest of the family.
Vote time! What to do now?
Voting ends on Wednesday, March 16, 2022, at 12pm London time.
Only doom lay in her future, Kei reflected as she lay on Tenten's bed, seeking the comforting scent of her Companion. Not the kind of doom that involved Hidden Rock descending on the village and tearing it to shreds in its weakened state (probably). Nor the kind of doom that involved being mentally and emotionally crushed by her continued association with a would-be genocidal empire whose bidding she willingly carried out in exchange for practical benefits (that was still to come). No, this was a very personal kind of doom that no other being on this earth could suffer as she could.
She was, once again, to be without Ami.
More significantly, she would be without Ami at a time of chaos and confusion, when the Hokage's brilliant, revolutionary ticket idea would force the KEI to fundamentally review its policies, operating principles, and future goals while simultaneously being stripped of whatever superior cadres would become the foundation of AMITY. Naruto, in theory, possessed the necessary training to navigate these murky political waters, but the Leaf that the Third and Jiraiya had prepared him to rule bore precious little resemblance to the complicated mess made of it by the chain of cataclysms that began with the Battle on the Beach and ended(?) with the Fourth Shinobi World War. Kei, of course, was a logistician half-trained for a different village, and it was an open question when her various subordinates and supporters would recognise her for the fraud she was. There was no possible way she could bear her share of the burden.
As such, it was incumbent on her to prepare herself emotionally as best she could, and with Tenten unavailable, what better succour for her battered soul than some choice literature—in this case, due to be personally delivered by Akane, a bribe for her silence whose publication had been tragically delayed by the iniquities of war. The notion of so much as hinting at Kei's reading preferences was nothing short of mortifying, but alas, in Akane's case that ship had sailed as thoroughly as her ship with Ino (with the benefit of hindsight, even Kei was able to recognise Hazō and Ino's past behaviour as blatant flirting).
And then, there was the other matter. In defiance of all precedent and possibility, perhaps there was something only Kei could do.
"Akane," Kei greeted her sister and potential sister-in-law-twice-over as she sat up. "Thank you for coming. I trust you were undetected?"
"I told Hazō and Noburi I was going to visit you," Akane said, "and the Nara I met at the gate and on my way up here were very polite. Some of them were giving me strange looks, though. You don't suppose they've heard the rumours?"
Kei did not facepalm, but only because she was a mature adult. Apparently, the cavalcade of atrocities perpetrated by the Leaf rumour mill included, of late, the notion that she was dating Akane. Like any rumour that was both salacious and personally inconvenient to her, it had spread like wildfire.
"Pay them no mind," Kei said, "and for the record, I am not in romantic or sexual relationships with Kei Anko, Hyūga Yumenori, Tachibana Wakaba, or Gōketsu Yuno, much less a combination of the aforesaid, not that it would be anyone's business but my own if I were. Except possibly in the case of Anko, for then I hope I would be urgently incapacitated by my loved ones pending de-lupchanzening treatment."
"Noted," Akane said with a mischievous smile that provided Kei with heartfelt relief given Yuno's reports.
"Say," she went on, "is that today's broadsheet? Fifi stole ours before I had a chance to read it."
"You missed little, I assure you," Kei said. "Team Rame has struck again. In the past week, it has defeated three Rock jōnin teams and foiled a dastardly plot to poison Tanzaku Gai's water supply. With exploits such as theirs, Tower analysts anticipate that Rock will be forced to sue for peace within the fortnight, lest its mounting losses leave it unable to conduct even basic chakra beast extermination within its territory. Needless to say, Leaf remains at its peak of power despite Rock's underhanded means of warfare, courtesy of superior leadership, extraordinary feats of medicine, and the blessing of the Will of Fire."
"Captain Rame has been one of my heroes since I was a little girl," Akane said, looking wistfully into the distance. "I wanted to be just like her all the way until I met Rock Lee and learned about the Spirit of Youth. Thinking about it, it's strange that I haven't come across her in all my time as a Leaf ninja."
Kei was startled, and more than a little disturbed, by the fact that she found herself reluctant to explain to Akane about Deta Rame, and what it meant that the heroic chūnin was not only the star of Leaf's propaganda publications, but had been ever since the days of the Second Hokage. Was this a consequence of her changing relationship with Akane, or had Kei herself become somehow warped by her experiences with Team Uplift?
"More importantly," she hurried to change the topic, "Akane, there was an issue I wished to raise with you today, while we have an opportunity to speak in private."
"Oh?"
Kei hesitated. She was in no way qualified for this. Realistically, she was the person in the world least suited for this kind of intervention. Unfortunately, with Mari incapable of accepting responsibility for her past actions, and Yuno's moral compass missing its lodestone, she was also the only one available.
"Yuno informed me about your mission," Kei said. "I understand that you are having difficulties coping."
Akane sat down heavily on Kei's bed (which was when Kei realised how stunningly embarrassing her choice of location was, and how it was too late to offer any kind of excuse in a natural fashion).
"It's not something you have to worry about, Kei," Akane said. "I brought it on myself."
"On the contrary," Kei said. "Family bonds aside, I am indebted you in a way that is immediately relevant. You offered to be by my side in my inner Swamp of Death, and your support has been precious. There is no better time for me to respond in kind."
Akane gave a weak smile. "Thanks, Kei. That means a lot to me. It really does. But this isn't something that anything can be done about. I'm seeing the consequences of my actions because they're the consequences of my actions. Running away from them won't make anything better."
"Running away?" Kei asked. "Allow me to guess. Hazō, unable to stand your distress, attempted to convince you that your actions were not your fault, and thus not your responsibility. Doubtless he belatedly acknowledged the cruel nature of the shinobi world, the true culprit behind the incident, and reiterated the promise of an Uplifted future where such tragedies would no longer occur."
"Something like that."
"Hazō has never felt responsible for his part in the Pangolin War," Kei said. "To him, his tally of innocent deaths runs in the mere dozens. He is in no position to imagine your feelings or mine after dooming thousands to death or to undying despair. Unlike you, I am unable to put numbers to the civilian casualties I am indirectly responsible for. On the other hand, I have a vague grasp of the size of the Condor Clan, and know that every one of its members is subject to the cultural genocide I have facilitated. Next to that, some mere civilian vessel is barely a scratch upon my soul."
"What are you saying?" Akane asked. For a second, Kei was afraid Akane would attempt to comfort her, which was the diametrical opposite of Kei's intent.
"You and I cannot escape our sins," Kei said. "Even if Hazō succeeds in flinging open the gates of Death, you cannot offer the resurrected the homes that you reduced to ash, nor restore the time they lost while this world left them behind."
Akane nodded. Her head did not come all the way back up.
"The same applies to the denizens of the Seventh Path, should Hazō even consider whether and how they may be resurrected. Uplift, even at its finest, is a gift to the future, not a redemption of the past.
"I do not believe that the way forward, for either of us, involves making peace with our pasts. It is not possible for the people we are to perceive those actions as acceptable."
"Who are the people we are?" Akane interrupted. "I thought I was someone who'd never kill innocent people like that. I thought I could kill people for the good of Leaf, or to save my life, or to save my loved ones. I thought that was within the limits of the Will of Fire. But there were thousands. I killed more people than Leaf has ever had ninja. My life isn't worth that. My loved ones' lives aren't worth that. The good of Leaf isn't worth that, not when all those deaths barely make a difference to anything back home.
"How can I say I'm someone who can't accept these actions when I chose to set the fires? I chose not to stop them, even though there must have been a way."
"This is a crisis I have anticipated for years," Kei admitted. "The world is not so kind that it would allow any of us to keep their hands clean in deference to our moral purity. I will admit, at times it has been like watching a bird plummeting even as it believed it was flying, all while knowing that there was no possible way to break its fall. Now, it is finally over. You have crashed into the same world as the rest of us.
"I can offer you nothing to solve your crisis of identity. My own remains an appalling mess despite concerted effort. However, if you are filled with regret and loathe the person you have become, there I am entirely on familiar ground."
"I…" Akane looked at her for a few seconds, choosing words. "No offence, Kei, but I don't want to be the person you think you are. This isn't about hating myself. It's about realising what I've been like all along. Hollow. Hypocritical."
"As I say," Kei replied, "that is not for me to solve. That I should presume to offer any advice at all is staggering in its arrogance, and rest assured, I would gladly hand this task over to another if anyone at all were available. However, here we are. Hazō is mistaken if he believes absolution is possible for either of us. Nothing we do with our lives from here on out can change the past, and the balance sheet of karma to be calculated only at the end is a naïve delusion for those unwilling to take responsibility."
Akane gave something that could theoretically be described as a smile. "You really do have a unique way of cheering people up."
"At least I am good for something," Kei said wryly. "No, my point is that you must accept your actions and their consequences. It is futile to seek to escape them through self-justification, even as others might exhort you to do so in order to save you from your suffering. You already have my respect for refusing to turn away as some have done from theirs. However, and please correct me if I have misunderstood, since I recognise I have psychological insight to humble the most brilliant duck, there you have stopped. Your hypocrisy, inevitable for a holder of beliefs no one could live by in a world so dark, is now apparent to you. So is your hollowness, inevitable for one who has poured their entire being into these impossible beliefs, and thus has nothing left without them. Is it enough for you to recognise these truths?"
Kei could see the pain in Akane's eyes. It was heartrending. Kei hated herself—more than usual—for knowing no other way to handle sensitive emotions than with the bluntness of a sledgehammer. Yet were she to attempt subtlety, or to hold back with kindness she did not know how to wield, in all likelihood she would fail to express herself altogether, or even be too timid to try when unable to leverage her strengths.
"What else is there?" Akane asked. "This is me now. Someone who burns down towns full of innocent people because the mission says so."
"This," Kei exclaimed, raising a finger, "this is the essential part! Here is where I hold the advantage over you, as one who has hated herself for many years and was surprised by the scale of the atrocity caused by her irresponsibility, not the fact. Akane, this is not 'you now'. This is who you have always been. You are not a fallen paragon of morality, for your morality was always impossible, always waiting to run into a wall.
"The corollary I must convey to you is that all of your actions thus far have stemmed from this hypocritical, hollow self. Your love for Hazō and your choice to enter a relationship with him—twice, even, to our collective shock. Your dedication to Uplift. Your various passions, great and small. All of them belong to the same Akane who incinerates thousands of innocents at a word from her superiors, not to some ideal self that, you now learn, never existed."
"So you're saying," Akane concluded, "that I shouldn't feel bad, because I have always been a terrible person."
"Not exactly," Kei said. "I can hardly recommend that you accept your flaws and love yourself in spite of them when I have never succeeded in that herculean task myself, and suspect strongly that the concept is a fiction intended to energise the ignorant for greater productivity. Rather, having accepted that you are Akane who incinerates thousands of innocents, and that this does not represent a reduction of your existing nature or capabilities, only your self-image, you are free to ask what else this Akane does.
"I cannot provide you with a moral impulse to guide your future actions, should you abandon Youth in all its forms. I am barely cognizant of the motivations behind my own. If you wish to join the KEI, or even to take more extreme steps, I have no authority with which to convince you otherwise. However, should you choose to continue to act as a Gōketsu and to work in the name of Uplift… rest assured that in this of all worlds, there can be no rules to prevent a mass murderer from doing so."
For a while, they sat in silence, Akane processing and Kei praying that her untrained intervention would not shatter Akane's soul into tiny pieces. It was necessary, she believed—according to Yuno, Akane was suffering from flashbacks, and Tachibana had once informed Snowflake those were a high risk for death in combat and suicide—but anyone who had so much as met Kei would agree that she was more of an exploding tag than a surgeon.
"This is a lot to get my head around, Kei," Akane said eventually. "I've never heard anyone talk like this before, and I don't think I'd ever have come up with it on my own either."
"On the contrary." Kei dared to smile. "I do not believe I could have developed this line of thought without you. You offered to be with me in my inner Swamp of Death, at a time when the others demanded that I step into the light. I learned this form of acceptance from you—though I admit that, for all my exhortations, I myself am but a stumbling and awkward student.
"I will be with you in your inner Swamp of Death, Akane, if you will have me. I will be there as you explore your pain, and master it, and someday integrate it into a new Akane that neither of us can yet imagine. We cannot escape our crimes. We cannot deny them if we wish to grow. However, there is no need for us to face them alone."
Akane's eyes were glistening, and Kei could not tell whether she had driven her to tears with unintentional cruelty or whether the excess of emotion meant that something had struck true. She sensed that something more was needed.
Physical contact was not Kei's forte. She could sooner convince Yuno to embrace polygyny than convince herself to embrace Akane—not in the casual way normal people did, and not at a time when failure and a panic attack would be unacceptable. However, she had not wasted her time with the world's most patient partner.
Kei focused. She steadied her breathing as if preparing to snipe an unaware Condor Summoner, at which she would only have one chance. Then she reached out and placed her right hand on Akane's shoulder.
She left it there as long as she dared, which was an eternity by the standards of her early days of training. Akane sat still, rewarding her trust, and gave her first true smile of the day.
It was only hours later, after Akane left and Kei had spent sufficient time calming herself with export tax calculations, that she realised she had forgotten to take her signed copy of Enslaved by the Pirate King II: The Kraken Wakes from Akane, and that the possibility of it being discovered by her family was about to rise astronomically. Still, even as she scrolled through her mental catalogue of means of suicide, Kei decided that the meeting had been worth it.
-o-
What do you do?
Voting closes on Saturday 19th of March, 1 p.m. New York time, assuming @eaglejarl doesn't close it first.
"Good afternoon, Hazō," Kabuto said, seating himself across from Hazō. His voice was genial and he wore a friendly smile on his face. He didn't so much as glance at the massive box beside Hazō's chair. "Your pardon, I suppose I should say 'Lord Gōketsu' now?"
"Hazō is fine," Hazō said, smiling a perfect and friendly smile. "Thank you for joining us."
"Of course, of course! Time spent with you is always stimulating and, if we're being honest"—he leaned forward and dropped his voice to a stage whisper—"I would even have lunch with Hyūga Hiashi if he invited me to Moritaki's." He straightened up and laughed. "Granted, having lunch with a dead person would be interesting in and of itself, but you take my point."
"Indeed," Hazō said. He wasn't at all sure what to do with that, so he rolled on by it.
"So nice to see you again, Kabuto," Mari said, smiling. "It's been too long, what with everything that's been happening."
"It certainly has, it certainly has." The doctor grimaced. "And yes, it definitely has been grim lately. So many ninja injured or killed." He shook his head, then nodded thanks to the waiter who had, with almost ninja-like stealth, provided a cup of tea and a glass of water with a scalloped ginger slice floating in it before disappearing back to his position against the wall. Kabuto took a sip of the tea and sighed in satisfaction, then leaned back and bestowed that glowing smile on the final member of the meeting.
"And you, Noburi? How have you been—are you keeping up with your studies? The last time we worked together, I remember thinking that you had tremendous potential as a medic."
Noburi's face flickered with longing before relaxing back into a smile. "I'm afraid not, sensei. I've been busy helping Hazō set up the estate and then run it, plus working with the Hokage on all the various military stuff that's been happening."
"Ah, pity," Kabuto said. "Well, the hospital's loss is Leaf's gain. Should you ever decide to resume your medical training, feel free to seek me out. Things have been busy but an extra pair of hands would be useful, and it would be a blessing of the Sage to have a pair of hands attached to a person who doesn't need to be watched every moment." He shook his head. "We have one young lad so clumsy we can't give him any task more sophisticated than 'mop up the surgery'. Doctor Kon tried having him change bandages and he ended up putting them on either so tight that the limbs lost circulation or so loosely that they slipped off the wound. We downgraded him to 'empty the chamberpots' and ended up with a floor that was, shall we say, too slick to walk on. Sadly, we're so overloaded that we can't afford to kick him out."
"That's terrible!" Mari said, dismayed. She sipped her tea, then set it down. "I can relate on how exhausting it's been lately. Between missions and helping Hazō I've been running with an empty canteen. Today is the first day I've had to myself in weeks, and I feel blessed that it's so nice." She gestured around the empty patio, including by extension the cloudless sky and the rich golden light. The day was still crisp enough that there were braziers around their table, but between that and the sun it was quite comfortable.
"Please, tell us more about what's been happening for you," she continued, sitting back and sipping her tea.
"Oh, it's been fascinating! Tragic, but fascinating. We've received a large number of Rock ninja corpses and we've learned some important things that have been useful in caring for our own. You see..."
The conversation wended back and forth, stories being shared of the day's challenges and victories, thoughts and prayers. Jokes were exchanged and laughed at with varying degrees of sincerity. Throughout it all, Kabuto made them all feel like they were his bosom friends and boon companions in the quest against tragedy, evil, and the sadness of little puppies. And he never once asked about the giant box next to Hazō.
Finally, when the entrees were reduced to a few casual nibbles and the desserts were ordered, Hazō waited for a lull in the conversation and finally brought them around to the purpose of the meeting.
"I have something here that I think might interest you," he said, leaning over so that he could tap on the wooden cover of the box.
"Oh?" Kabuto sipped his tea, offering only an expression of polite interest.
"Recently, the Alpha of the Dog Clan sent me and a diplomatic team to the Arachnid Clan's territory. On the western edge of their territory is the Great Seal, a three-dimensional thing the size of a small mountain."
"Indeed," Kabuto said. "I've seen the mockup you created for Leaf's sealmasters. Fascinating stuff. I'm not a practitioner, but the art is interesting enough that I've picked up a few basics. I can, as they say, whistle the tune even if I can't sing it." He chuckled at the phrase. "Over the last weeks, I've spent a few enjoyable hours of my very limited free time sitting quietly while Leaf's top sealmasters come within a whisker's width of pulling each other's hair and rolling around in the dirt like schoolboys. It's quite entertaining."
"Uh...right. Anyway, apparently the Sage created the Seal as a gate that locks away a...well, a bunch of Dragons." He smiled and looked over to Noburi. "What's the right name for a group of Dragons? It's not a pack, or a herd...?"
"A disaster?" Noburi suggested. "Or maybe a cataclysm? A ravening?"
Hazō nodded. "That works. The Seal locks a ravening of Dragons into something like a storage space."
Kabuto's eyebrows climbed above the tops of his glasses. "Dragons."
Without taking his eyes off of Kabuto's, Hazō reached down and flipped the lid off the box.
Kabuto leaned forward, elbows on his knees and fingers interlaced as he stared into the box at a Dragon scale the size of Hazō's torso and a fragment of Dragon claw a handspan long. Both of them shimmered greasily in the sunlight, an almost-perceptible miasma of otherworldly horror misting up from their surface.
"What is that?" Kabuto asked, his voice completely flat.
"The smallest scale that we recovered, and a small segment of a claw. We have five scales total, the largest of which is taller than I am. We have the tip of one claw; it's four feet long and it appears to be only a snip of what the actual claw was. We also have other claw fragments that are longer than this one. And we have a tooth."
Kabuto's eyes flicked to Hazō. "You have a tooth?"
"Yes. Or maybe 'fang' is more appropriate. It's three feet long, swept back, and serrated. There's a small bit of soft tissue still attached."
For three long seconds, Kabuto was absolutely motionless, not so much as breathing...and then he snapped back to life and stood up, wiping his mouth on the linen napkin with the Moritaki name embroidered in rich white thread. He dropped the napkin on the table and nodded. "Could you please wait here? I need to run and fetch something."
Hazō exchanged glances with Mari, then shrugged. "I suppose. Will you be long? I need to be back at the estate in an hour and we still need to discuss the details of why I'm showing this to you."
"I will be back well before that. I apologize for my rudeness; your forbearance is most gracious." He bowed and disappeared. A barrel dropped to the ground where he had been standing; it was one of the ones that were positioned atop Leaf's roofs in order to facilitate rapid ninja travel via Substitution. While there were no restrictions on using them, it was not something that was done casually and traditionally the barrels were swapped from roof to roof instead of to the ground.
"That went well," Noburi said, the doubt in his voice giving his words the lie. He looked over his shoulder and signalled to the waiter. "Could I have another cup of that jasmine tea?"
It was closing in on half an hour before Kabuto returned; he was not alone, and all three Gōketsu froze when they saw his companion.
"Lord Orochimaru," Mari said, jumping to her feet with Hazō and Noburi half an instant behind. Hazō was confident that she wasn't intentionally taking a combat stance, but nonetheless her right foot had slid back and her body was turned half away from the Snake Sannin. He was also confident that she didn't realize she had stuck out an arm and swept Noburi behind her. Hazō was standing too far away to get the same treatment.
Orochimaru brushed by them with a grunt, his eyes never leaving the contents of the box. He crouched next to it, one hand on the edge in a gesture that in another would have been for balance but for him was most likely a barely-suppressed desire to reach inside.
"Dragons, you say?" Intentionally or due to lack of focus, the sibilants stretched in an inhuman fashion.
"Yes sir," Hazō said, leaning slightly backwards as he forced himself not to step away.
"What tests have you done?"
Hazō hesitated, then scooped an uneaten pork dumpling off the table and tossed it on the scale. It immediately began to sizzle and blacken, dancing slightly back and forth like water on a hot griddle. Orochimaru stared, transfixed, until the entire dumpling smoked away in stinking fumes, leaving only a lump of blackened, bubbly tar behind.
"I want it," he said, drawing a split of bamboo from inside his chest pocket and poking at the remnants. "Kabuto."
"Yes sir." Kabuto turned to Hazō. "Lord Orochimaru would like to—"
"No."
Mari looked at Hazō, wide-eyed. "Hazō..."
"No," he said, leaning hard on the Iron Nerve to replay the firm tones he had once used in a conversation that wasn't in front of his personal bogeyman. "Kabuto left before we were able to explain what we're trying to do. The Gōketsu want to make some Dragon parts available for public study. We would like Kabuto to host them in a lab at the hospital, since our compound isn't properly equipped for thorough investigation. We will maintain ownership of all Dragon parts as spoils of war; the Gōketsu and our allies killed it, we keep it. We are willing to discuss selling them, but that will not happen today, and it will be approved by the Tower. All research findings belong to the Tower, to be accessed on request by whomever the Hokage approves."
"Sir..." Kabuto said. "I believe Lord Orochimaru was willing to make an extremely generous offer."
Hazō's heart was pounding so hard it was up in his throat. There was an arrogant and amoral demigod crouched a leg length away. An arrogant and amoral demigod who had already shown his willingness to take what he wanted and back it up with force. Granted, this time was different; Mari had insisted that the meeting be outside and in a public place. There were three waiters standing against the wall and dozens of passersby a dozen yards away on the other side of a hedge of planters.
Of course, the waiters and all of the passerby were civilians, and the Hokage had already said that he would willingly throw Hazō to the wolves if Orochimaru wanted him thrown.
"Sir, this is a sample of what we have," Hazō said directly to Orochimaru, his voice remaining calm solely through the power of his bloodline. "The rest is on the Seventh Path with the Dog Clan. 'The rest' includes larger and far more interesting pieces. And there's five more sources of samples, each of them different from this one and from one another."
Orochimaru grunted, staring in fascination at the flames that were curling up from the end of his bamboo splinter. They were green.
The fear began to leach out of Hazō's soul, displaced by a steadily-growing drip of anger. "Lord Orochimaru. We are not selling you these items. They will be in a lab at the hospital, accessible to you just as they are accessible to everyone else with an interest. If you want to buy some of the rest of our collection, that's a discussion for another time."
"My equipment is in my lab," the demigod said absently. "I can't examine them properly at the hospital."
"Hazō," Mari said quietly. She reached out to take his arm, but the anger was swelling up higher in Hazō's chest and the fear was nearly submerged, tipping its ugly head back to keep its mouth above the surface as it gasped for air. He twitched away from her fingers. Off in his peripheral vision, Noburi shifted uncomfortably, then slid one step forward and to the side where he could flank anyone who went at Hazō from the front. Gratitude and loyalty overflowed in Hazō's heart and fear drowned at last.
"Lord Orochimaru. If you want access to my property then I would appreciate it if you would give me your attention."
Mari's face went white. Noburi's eyes went wide and he leaned back. He leaned, but he didn't move his feet.
Orochimaru shook the flames off the bamboo and turned to meet Hazōs eyes with his own. His irises were the yellow of disease and his pupils were vertical slits that looked like wounds. He considered Hazō for a moment, then flicked the last of the bamboo aside and stood up, absently brushing his clothes back into place. He considered Hazō the way a chef would consider which cut of fish to use, and then he shrugged one shoulder.
"Call it a rental," he said. "They'll be at my lab for the next month. After that, you can call them back whenever and...give them to the hospital, or hang them on your wall, or whatever else you like."
"Two weeks."
The words came out of Hazō's mouth before his brain even finished processing what Orochimaru had said, and the moment they escaped he wanted to get them back even if it meant biting his own lips off. Even the Iron Nerve couldn't keep his face calm at this point. His skin was clammy and he was flashing from hot to icy cold and back twice per second. He could feel himself shivering but he couldn't make himself stop.
One fine-lined eyebrow rose as the monster considered Hazō's words...and then he laughed.
"Fine. Two weeks. I'll want the same for the rest of the items when you bring them back." He turned back to the box.
"And what do we get?" said Hazō's stupid, traitorous mouth. Seriously, what in the name of the Sage was happening? Had the Iron Nerve decided that it was tired of being bossed around and that it was going to take charge for a time? Had some great otherworldly creature of the Out shoved its inhuman hand up Hazō's butthole and started using him as a sock puppet?
Orochimaru snorted. He patted his pockets for a moment and produced a sheaf of papers. He shuffled through them, tossed one on the table, considered, added a second, considered, then shrugged and dropped the whole stack before sweeping up the teapot and last plate of gyoza, then turning back to crouch beside the box of Dragon parts.
Hazō blinked. He watched Orochimaru sprinkle drops of tea on the scale while staring in fascination, then place a dumpling with exacting precision and hold his hand over it, a faint glow of medical chakra sheathing his skin.
Hazō tried to make his brain connect that view to everything that was happening around him. His brain simply returned a blank stare. Something was very wrong with the world.
Slowly, he picked up the six pages that had been flung so casually amid the remnants of their meal. The top one said: Draft against the Tower Treasury, account Orochimaru 2 in the amount of, and then a blank line. It was signed, in a swirling hand, Orochimaru.
"Sir, there's no amount here..." Hazō said, his voice coming out uncertain despite his best efforts. Apparently, sufficient amounts of emotional whiplash made even the Iron Nerve have trouble controlling the more delicate parts of one's body.
"Pah." Orochimaru waved dismissively, not bothering to look up as he slid a gyoza along the edge of the Dragon claw fragment.
"But..."
"Lord Orochimaru is quite wealthy," Kabuto said. "Although, sir?" he said, speaking to Orochimaru, "Perhaps it would be wise to—" He stopped talking instantly when the Snake Sannin glanced over his shoulder with narrowed eyes. It was only for a moment before going back to his food-based impromptu experiments, but Kabuto still had to take a moment to visibly gather spit back into his mouth before he could continue.
"Lord Orochimaru is quite wealthy," Kabuto said again, speaking to Hazō. "He keeps several accounts with the Tower. May I ask which one that draft is against?"
"Uh...account 2?" Hazō said.
"That would be petty cash and property outside of Leaf," Kabuto said, nodding thoughtfully. "Probably not more than thirty or forty million ryō. It's possible that some or all of it will be on promise, since the Tower may or may not have that much on hand. I don't know what the properties would be, but it's likely farms, lumbering rights, that sort of thing. Tax income and resource claims."
Something about this whole conversation was unreal. Was he having another Out seizure? Had the nearness of the Dragon fragments affected him somehow?
Oh, wait, this was probably another one of Mari's genjutsu tests. Hah. Of course. Clearly he had failed the test; she must have caught him far enough back that she was getting annoyed with him for not detecting it and she was making the illusion steadily more ridiculous to see how long it would take him to notice.
"Kai," Hazō said, pulsing his chakra and turning back to Mari to compliment her on—
...the genjutsu that she did not appear to be using because the world still looked exactly the same. Orochimaru was still rubbing food across the nail clippings of an eldritch monster, Hazō was still clutching a blank check and five storage seals, and Mari's green eyes were still wide and staring from a face that had gone utterly bloodless.
"Mari, is this...?"
She shook her head, the action jerky and utterly unlike her.
"Really? Because—"
"It's not," she said firmly.
Oh.
He shuffled the account draft to the bottom and looked at the next page. It was a storage seal, a list of contents on the back in neatly curved handwriting: Bioaugmentation, Subject 17, Aug 1039 - Mar 1040
The second was Seal #31, Collab w/Jiraiya, May 1042
His fingers numb, he checked the others.
Seal #32, Collab w/Jiraiya, July 1042
Human Bio, Blood Prod, Attempt #16, Collab w/Tsunade, Jan 1041
Mission notes, Resources, Honey coast, Mar 1047
"What is it?" Noburi asked quietly. Hazō passed over the sheets wordlessly. Noburi's eyes went wide as he looked through. He opened the fourth seal; a stack of loose pages, wrapped in leather and tied closed with a cord, dropped into his hands. He slipped the cord off and skimmed through the pages, then swallowed and looked up to meet Hazō's inquiring expression. Noburi nodded, the motion that of a clumsily-handled puppet, and resealed the notes before handing the stack back to Hazō.
Hazō opened the second seal and another unbound collection of pages dropped out. He skimmed through them; half were written in the same neat hand that had labeled the backs of the storage seals. The other half were the sloppy, mirror-writing chicken scratches that Jiraiya used in his unpublished personal notes. A brief flash of grief tore at Hazō's throat.
Kabuto had been watching the byplay patiently, but now he cleared his throat.
"Would this be sufficient payment...?" he asked.
Hazō held up a hand to stop him as he opened the third seal, and the fourth, and the fifth. Detailed research notes between the greatest sealmaster ever born and a man with knowledge so rare, so beyond what any normal person would even seek...the seals were nothing earth-shattering, all of them from early in the research of both authors, but the principles involved, the methods of research, the innermost thoughts of these two men... The medical data was outside his understanding, but the neat and tidy yet slightly crabbed hand was Tsunade's and Noburi was practically drooling. The last one was a list of valuable flora and fauna that Orochimaru had seen during a mission to Honey. Potentially very valuable, although harvesting and transport would be an issue.
"Lord Orochimaru?" Hazō asked, the words becoming firm halfway through as he forcibly clamped down on his emotions. "We are agreed that you will have two weeks of exclusive access and then we may recall the items at any time? And that you will make all your research findings public?"
"Yes, yes," Orochimaru said, waving dismissively and not looking away from what he was doing. He had lifted the claw fragment up with a mix of chakra adhesion and repulsion that kept it balanced an inch from his skin. He was turning it back and forth and his forked tongue was extended a foot and a half, tasting the air around the Sageforsaken object.
"Lord Gōketsu?" Kabuto said, a verbal nudge that barely hinted at impatience. "Hazō? Would this be sufficient payment?"
Hazō looked to his clan mates. Noburi was furiously nodding with imploring eyes. Mari was frozen and offering no input.
"This is a very generous offer," Hazō said slowly. "I think—"
What does Hazō think?
XP AWARD: 3
Brevity XP: 1
"GM had fun" XP: 0
No ding, but the plan specified "Prep: Ask Cannai, Kumokogo, Shima and Fukasaku about the Sage's band of five. (Names, abilities, stories, appearance/descriptions, symbols)". I know that this was intended to be offscreen but these are major characters where every conversation has significant potential impact on Hazō's relations with them, and the information you're looking for isn't a short and simple question. They also require more detailed worldbuilding than we've done on the subject thus far. Each of those conversations should really be its own scene, and that's way more than can fit in one update.
I had thought I would write at least one of the Boss conversations, but I'm afraid I have neither the time nor the energy, so I'm going to cut here instead of doing a slipshod job.
It is now 3pm and you're standing in a public place while Orochimaru fiddles with a small Dragon scale (roughly the size of Hazō's torso)
Voting will remain closed for now; @Velorien may decide to open it or he may decide that he wants to write the Shikamaru scene and/or some/all of the Boss conversations. Also, we might give ourselves an out by saying that one or more of the relevant Seventh Path experts weren't available for comment on the timeframe you needed.
Hidden safely behind the barriers, Yūsuke counted down the seconds to the grand success that would turn his career around. No more watching stinking idiots get promoted over his head practically out of the Academy just because they had shiny clan names. When Hayasaka saw the amazing fruits of Yūsuke's original research, Yūsuke just knew he'd award him the assistant supervisor position there and then. He would have funding, and recognition, and people would start inviting him to parties, and he would finally be ready to ask—
There was a dull pop.
Yūsuke waited some more, in case the pop was a prelude to greatness.
He waited some more.
There was a deafening burst of laughter from over his shoulder.
"Hey, look, Kagami screwed up another prototype! Ready to admit that your Seal of Sucking is impossible after all?"
Yūsuke had exactly three things he was good at, and unfortunately, clever names weren't one of them. Still, he really regretted describing his new idea as "a seal that sucks and then explodes" in front of the entire facility. Worse, if he couldn't come up with a better name by the time he finished the project, he knew for a fact that his new seal would be known as Kagami's Seal of Sucking for the rest of time.
With a sigh, he began to clear up the safety measures. There were way too many of those, and it always took forever, especially when nobody helped. The lab was very strict about research safety, even though people didn't die that often, and when they did, it was usually because they'd done something stupid. By the time you got to Yūsuke's level, you understood that a sealmaster couldn't get anywhere without an acceptable amount of risk. Maybe one day he'd have students of his own, who'd actually listen when he explained these things to them, and not call him suicidally reckless just because he forgot to turn on the spectral dehumidifier that one time.
It was late by the time Yūsuke had finished, but luckily the lights lining the path down the mountain were still lit. The walk back down to the village proper was still long and draining, but going downhill after a hard day's research beat dragging himself uphill in the late mornings into a cocked hat.
"Yūsuke," Dad grunted, looking up from a technique scroll he'd been studying at the table. "How was work?"
Yūsuke gave a tired smile. "I'm nearly there, Dad. Just a little more tinkering, and I'll have an exploding seal bigger and better than you've ever seen. Whenever people centuries from now hear the name Kagami, the first thing they'll think of Kagami's Seal of… mumblemumble."
"Centuries, huh?" Dad chuckled. "Someone's confident. You up to fixing dinner tonight?"
"Of course I am!"
Kagami Yūsuke might only have had three things he was good at, but he was very, very good at them. Whipping up a feast fit for a Kage in half an hour with inferior ingredients? Child's play. (Which it had been, back when Dad was working a single father's worth of missions and barely had time to sleep, never mind cook.) Yūsuke headed straight for the cupboard—
The vision faded, leaving only the darkness of the mountain path. They'd laughed at him when he suggested placing lamps to make the descent safer, making fun of his night vision which was as good as any ninja's. People always laughed at Yūsuke when he made sensible suggestions, which was why he never collaborated on research projects. Well, that and all the other sealmasters were stinking idiots, so he wouldn't have worked with them even if they asked.
As for Dad, it couldn't be helped that he was a morning bird. One of these days they'd be at home and awake at the same time, and until then, sandwiches were fine. He was too tired to cook when he got back from work anyway.
-o-
Yūsuke had meant today to be a day of study at the Monastery of the Long Path, which was entrusted with extremely dangerous ancient sealing lore (so, in short, ancient sealing lore), and whose scribe-monks refused to let so much as a scrap of parchment out of their badly-lit vaults. (Then again, Yūsuke's first sealing lab was still a perfectly hemispherical crater with a petrified ibex in the middle, so maybe they had a point.) Not that Yūsuke had a problem with spending his day in peace and quiet poring over fascinating if badly-organised data instead of being mocked by his so-called peers over trivial mistakes that could've happened to anybody.
Of course, Yūsuke wasn't that lucky. In fact, he was downright miserable at being called not to the mission office, not even before the Raikage (who had a reputation as a decent sort, as long as you didn't catch him in a desk-splitting mood), but to the office of the dreaded Spymaster M, who chewed up the likes of Yūsuke and didn't always spit them out.
M, a giant of a man who'd won every taijutsu competition before the injury, glared at him like Yūsuke had blown up his cat (it probably hadn't been his cat, and it had been a long time ago and an accident anyway). "So kind of you to finally join us, Kagami. Sit your ass down and listen up."
"S-Sir," Yūsuke stammered, "are you sure you have the right person? I'm a research sealmaster. I'm not the best at… fieldwork."
"Are you refusing a mission, soldier?" M growled.
"N-No, sir!"
"Then shut your damn mouth."
One of the other ninja in the room, that stinking idiot Yasaka, sniggered under his breath. Yūsuke wondered for the thousandth time if it was possible to blow someone up thoroughly enough that ANBU couldn't investigate the murder due to lack of evidence.
Of course, M didn't enforce discipline when Yasaka was involved, him with his perfect hair and his silver tongue and his many girlfriends who were probably only with him because he was a rich clan boy.
M pointed to a weathered-looking map on the desk in front of him. "Your objective for this mission is located in Mōnai, in the north of the Fire Country. Murasaki, you've done Fire Country infiltrations before. Bring the rest up to speed for me."
Yūsuke had been so nervous he hadn't even noticed Ayako in the room. Ayako being on the mission changed everything.
"Mōnai is one of the three major cities of the Fire Country along with Tanzaku Gai and Keishi," Ayako said in her beautiful, refreshing voice that flowed like a mudslide with snow and ice mixed in. "It's traditionally been a low-priority target for raiders because of its heavily-protected granaries and the fact that much of the city's wealth is invested in architecture, art, and other illiquid resources—that's ones that a raiding party can't just pick up and carry away, Kagami. I suppose you could carry away a painting or a vase or something if you wanted, but most ninja don't tend to think in terms of trading in the fine arts market after they're done looting and burning.
"It's also a castle town, and there's no way of knowing how many ninja are stationed inside the castle, if any, or what defences it has, without solid intel."
"Which we have," M said smugly. "To cut a long story short, in five days' time, the city's defences will be extra-thin, and we'll make sure they're that bit thinner with a diversion in the area. During that time, you four infiltrate the city in disguise—we'll have travel papers ready for you—get into the castle, and destroy your objective, Target N."
"What does N stand for?" Yūsuke interrupted.
"It stands for 'need to know'," M snapped. "Which also happens to be spymaster speak for 'Shut up and listen until I'm done'."
Yūsuke's heart, already beating so hard it hurt from being in the same room as Ayako, picked up the pace. After his time in crypto, it was hard to believe that anything could still be classified for him. What could Target N be? Forbidden lore foretelling the end of the world? An experimental subject from one of Leaf's many secret projects, with unimaginable psychic powers? A seal-powered war machine scavenged from the remains of Hidden Whirlpool?
"Unfortunately," M went on, "we have no idea where exactly Target N is, and your window isn't going to be anywhere near long enough to search an entire damn castle, especially if that Leaf asshole was smart enough to remodel it with hidden rooms. That's where you come in, Kagami."
"Me?" Kagami swallowed. If he was going to have to fight, especially in front of Ayako…
"I'm told you're some kind of demolitions savant. Do you reckon you can level a castle within an hour?"
Yūsuke checked to make sure he wasn't obviously drooling.
"Equipment clearance, sir?"
M smirked. "Go wild."
"I'll do it," Yūsuke said resolutely. Ayako would see just what he was capable of. They'd all see just what he was capable of.
-o-
To be continued.
Chapter 506: Talking with the Boss, Part 1 of Part 1
The day before Hazō, Mari, and Noburi rent the seals to Orochimaru...
Noburi is attempting to make Ma and Pa feel relaxed and friendly so that they will share whatever they know about the Sage's band of five. (Names, abilities, stories, appearance/descriptions, symbols, etc). They aren't averse to talking about this so he'll be able to get some information, but if he manages to beat their roll then he'll get substantially more.
Noburi, Rapport (24) + invoke "Sensitive About My Cooking" (one of Shima's Aspects that he didn't have to use Empathy to discover because she's very obvious about it) + invoke "Zone of Friendship" (his own Aspect and basically tailor made for this setting) + 3 (dice) = 33
Ma, Empathy (?) + 0 (dice) = ?
Pa, Empathy (?) + 3 (dice) = ?
"Thank you for the tea," Noburi said, nodding politely as he set the cup down. "And for the soup." He picked up the spoon and sampled, acutely aware of Shima standing over him looking expectant.
He blinked, then immediately sampled a bit more, forcing himself not to simply pick the bowl up and glug it down. "Sage, this is amazing." The words were no mere flattery; this soup was the savory equivalent of lying back, drowsy and content, in a sunny meadow with no particular place to be.
"Ha! Told you I could make that work," Shima said to her husband.
"Oh hush," Fukasaku grumbled. "I never said you couldn't. I just thought you were using a little too heavy a hand on the dill, that's all." Despite his words, the Toad patriarch was spooning the soup up just as fast as Noburi.
"Did you make the recipe up?" Noburi asked.
Few things are more horrifying than being simpered at by a two-foot tall toad with purple lipstick and purple hair.
"A little bit of tradition, a sprinkle of experimentation, and a double handful of experience," she said.
"More than a double handful," Fukasaku muttered.
"Are you calling me old, you antique coot?!"
"Actually, that reminds me of something I meant to ask you two," Noburi said quickly. "Humans generally live thirty or forty years, maybe sixty or seventy if they're very lucky. People on the Seventh Path seem to live much longer. Hundreds of years."
"Bah," Shima said, waving one webbed hand dismissively. "That's mostly nonsense. Sure, some of them like to claim they've lived for centuries, but they're mostly lying."
"We aren't lying," Fukasaku said, glowering at his wife.
"Sure, but when those Pangolin upstarts claim it they're sucking on fewmets."
"Stop being such a snob. Some of them have. That boy with his scales all adangle, for one. I remember him being around when we had that little kerfluffle on the border."
"Excuse me," Noburi siad. "'Scales adangle'?"
Fukasaku waved dismissively. "Something like that. Panty? Pants? He brags himself up by claiming his scales are dangling."
"...Do you mean 'Pantsā of the Adamant Scales'?"
"That's the one!" Fukasaku snapped his fingers and pointed at Noburi in acknowledgement. "Bah. Pretentious much?"
"Sir...Pantsā is the leader of the Pangolin Clan."
"Bah." Another dismissive wave and he went back to his soup.
"How does that work, anyway?" Noburi asked. "Clan leaders, I mean. Do they choose their own successors?"
"It varies," Shima said, patting him on the arm. "Also, it's usually complicated—or simple, depending on how you look at it. They'll say that it's a choice of the people, or of the winds of fate, or whatever. In reality, there's always one or two people who make the decision."
"Such as yourselves?"
Shima and Fukasaku exchanged amused glances. "We're much too old to weigh in on that sort of thing," Fukasaku said, reaching for the bread.
Noburi chuckled. "Meaning that I shouldn't ask."
"I knew there was a reason I liked you," Fukasaku said. "How are things going for you, boy?" The implied 'we are done with that topic' could not have been more clear.
Noburi paused to consider. "Things are..."
The ancient Toad Sages waited.
"Things are..."
"Complicated?" / "Unstable?"
"...Those fit, I guess. We've been in a war for months, Leaf has lost about a third of its ninja, but we've lost more like eighty percent of the people who actually matter in a fight."
Shima's already wide eyes went wider. "Are you going to survive?"
"Probably? There's a new organization being started. It's called the AMITY, because my sister's sister likes to name things after herself."
"Your sister's sister?" Fukasaku said, curious. He poured himself another cup of tea and leaned back in his chair, one bony green ankle resting on the other knee. "Isn't that just your sister?"
"It's complicated. I told you how the Gōketsu formed—we were tricked out of Mist, we found the Pangolin Scroll, invented the skywalker, and used all that to buy our way into Leaf and form the Gōketsu clan. My sister Kei was originally a Mori, then she became a Gōketsu when we founded the clan, and then she married into the Nara. She's still a Gōketsu, I think, but she's also a Nara. Her sister, Mori Ami, is this unstoppable engine of chaos prodigy who does whatever she wants and always gets away with it. She's also psychotically devoted to Kei, to the level where she almost decided to kill us all because she didn't like something that Mari did that put Kei in danger. Recently, Ami decided that it would make Kei safer if she ended war, so she did."
"She ended the war? On her own?" Shima asked, shocked.
Noburi laughed. "No, that's much too fiddly for Ms Prodigy. She ended all war, forever. Probably. Possibly." He poured himself another cup of tea and sipped it. "This is good tea, by the way. I didn't say this before, but thank you for having me in your home, and cooking for me."
"Whatever!" Shima said, flapping a hand at him. "What's this 'ending all war forever' thing?"
"She created an agency called the AMITY. I don't know the details, but apparently it's an alliance between the major Elemental Nations and some of the minor nations. A mutual defense pact, where if anyone attacks anyone else then everyone attacks the aggressor."
Fukasaku snorted. "Pull the other one. People down there think that has a chance of working long-term? Sure, the minor nations tried it, but they had a common enemy in the majors."
"First, 'down there'?" Noburi asked, raising an eyebrow. "What makes you think the Human Path isn't up from here?"
"Stop prattling and answer the question! Do they honestly believe it will work long-term?"
"I don't know if people believe it will work, but they at least believe it's worth talking about. There's going to be a big meeting between all the Kage and the leaders of some of the minor nations." He tipped his head in realization. "Actually, I'm not sure if it's all the Kage. I have no idea whether Rock is getting invited or not, or what will happen if they are."
"So they're going to get together and make this mutual defense treaty," Shima said. "And the day after that, someone is going to stage a false flag attack as a way of getting everyone to destroy their enemy."
Noburi shrugged. "I assume that's going to be one of the first things they talk about."
"In a thousand years, no human has ever done this? What's so special about this girl that she can convince rulers of nations to listen to her?"
Noburi shrugged again. "Like I said, she's a prodigy with Infiltration and Seduction experience. She basically does whatever she wants and gets away with it. She attracted Orochimaru's interest and survived—"
"Little Oro is still running around down there?" Shima asked. "How is that boy?"
"He's...uh...not a boy anymore, ma'am. He's a grown man, and he's terrifying."
Fukasaku clicked his tongue. "Still doing those snake things, hm?"
"Yep. He's got eyes like a snake—literally. They're bright yellow with vertical slits. According to the stories, during the Battle of the Gods he made his tongue sixty feet long and forked it three times so that he could wield three separate swords."
Both Sages rolled their eyes.
"Oh, please," Fukasaku sneered. "Tongue enhancement is the first trick any young Toad learns, and a sense of proportion is the second. Sounds like little Oro is overcompensating something fierce."
"Yes sir. Anyway, he's probably one of the five most powerful ninja in the world who isn't a Kage or a jinchūriki, and he's likely more powerful than some of those. Recently, he was going to kidnap Hazō for dissection, we think. Asuma said that he needs Orochimaru more than he needs the Gōketsu. He told us how to resolve the issue but he said that he couldn't be seen to involve himself directly."
"He what?!" Shima shouted, bolting to her feet. "I need to have a talk with that boy! How dare he—"
"Ma'am, I don't like it either, but I understand where he was coming from. Asuma is—was—in the middle of a war. Orochimaru contributes massive combat power, but more importantly he contributes a reputation that makes the other nations think twice about attacking Leaf. The Gōketsu don't. On top of that...well, I wouldn't say this to anyone on the Human Path, but Orochimaru is crazy. He's barely under control, and he's already shown that he's willing to abandon the village if he's pushed too far. Asuma is the Kage of Leaf, not the lord of the Gōketsu. He needs to prioritize thirty thousand lives over one, or even over the half dozen ninja and several hundred civilians in our clan."
"Why didn't he just order the boy to stand down? Sure, he was always headstrong, but..." She trailed off.
"Yeah. 'But.' If Orochimaru accepts the order and stands down, great. If he doesn't then Asuma can't physically force him to the way his father or Jiraiya could. Tsunade and maybe Naruto are the only ones in the village who can stop Orochimaru, but if Asuma orders them to do it then he's reminding everyone that he can't do it himself. That weakens his ability to be Kage and means that people are more likely to start questioning his orders or wanting to insert themselves into the planning process where they shouldn't be. We're in the middle of a war; we can't have that."
Shima slowly sat down, grumpiness spreading itself across her wide face. "Hrmph."
"Yeah," Noburi said, nodding and offering a 'what can you do' wave of one hand. "Anyway, a while back Orochimaru got interested in maybe dissecting Ami. In order to get out of it she created a thing called the Final Gift Program, where elderly ninja who are going to die soon give themselves to Orochimaru for experimentation in exchange for a large payment to their families."
"Where's he getting the money from?" Fukasaku asked, curious. "He was missing until twenty minutes ago, wasn't he?"
"He was, and I'm not sure. I know that he took his old house back and kicked us all out, claiming that the Tower hadn't had the right to take it from him. Maybe he did the same with his old cash reserves from before his disappearance? Or maybe the Tower is paying it. Dunno, not my area."
"Hrmph."
"My thoughts exactly. That was just one example. Ami has also toppled a Mizukage, created an organization that gives Leaf's clanless ninja almost as much power as the clans, created an organization that gives Mist's young ninja almost as much power as the clans, fought beside Naruto and Kei when they defeated the Condor Boss, and convinced both the Mizukage and the Hokage that they should let her change citizenship from Mist to Leaf. Now she's decided to end war everywhere for always."
"How old is this girl?" Shima asked.
"Not sure exactly? Eighteen, nineteen? Something like that."
"And in hundreds of years, no one ever decided to make a defense treaty that would end war?" Fukasaku demanded.
Noburi grimaced. "In fairness, it wasn't really possible until now. I think it's less that she's transforming the world through her own will and more that she's taking advantage of a situation that allows for the world to be transformed.
"I talked to Mari about this. She got pretty detailed in her breakdown and I didn't understand all of it, but the upshot is that up until very recently it wasn't possible. During the Warring Clans period there wasn't enough cohesion to form a global alliance—too many factions, too many grudges, not enough leadership. Seventy years ago, Senju Hashirama united a bunch of the strongest clans to form Leaf—"
"We know that, boy," Fukasaku snapped. "We were Jiraiya's friends for decades, you think we don't know the history of that little puddle he calls home?"
"Called." Shima laid her hand on her husband's and silence laid its hand on all of them.
"...Well," Noburi said eventually, "after Leaf was founded, the other nations condensed into their own Hidden Villages. Now, suddenly, there's enough leadership and cohesion that it's theoretically possible to condense further, but only after a couple of generations have grown up thinking that it's normal to live with and fight beside people from other clans.
"Then the Third—"
"Oh, little Hiru! He was such a good boy. What a loss."
"Yes, ma'am. The Third spent decades spreading the idea that it wasn't just clans that could work together, it was nations. He held things together for a decade before World War Three—"
"We know all this," Shima said. "And it wasn't his failure that caused the third war. Without him, it would have started at least a year earlier. There were droughts and famines for two years and people were starving. He kept things together for two years even as bandits started burning everything to the ground and people were dying left and right. Those Rock bastards kicked in the door of Claw, Claw got wedged between Wind and Rain, Lightning took a bite out of Hot Springs, and everything went to the trash. Hiru and Jiraiya both talked to us about it and asked for suggestions."
There were times when it was hard to remember that these tiny little toad people had lived through the events that Noburi only knew from history books. Not just lived through them, but influenced them.
"Right. Um, sorry. Anyway, with the First condensing the various tribes into the villages and the Third condensing the villages into something like friendly relationships, things were ripe for Ami to do what she did. Rock started this war, Lightning started to step in and then got its nose bloodied and backed out. Everyone knew that it was going to spread, so the idea of a way out that didn't mean losing face was appealing." He shrugged. "That's what Mari said, anyway."
"Why did Rock start all this, anyway?" Shima asked. "Seems like it wasn't to their interest."
Noburi shrugged helplessly. "There's been a lot of speculation. Someone said that they were having a famine and needed better farmland."
"Ridiculous!" Fukasaku snapped. "Why not just buy the food? Asuma's a good boy and he learned at his father's knee. He would have been happy to sell them food at affordable rates that would tie the nations together."
"Well, another theory is that Leaf got off relatively lightly in the Battle of the Gods, making us more powerful in comparison. Maybe Rock was worried that we would grow our power faster than they could and if they didn't strike now they wouldn't be able to strike in the future."
"Bah," Fukasaku said, flapping one hand. "Even more ridiculous. If that was the worry then they should have coordinated with Lightning, attacked you on two fronts simultaneously."
"I mean...Lightning did attack us..."
"When?"
"Um...I don't remember exactly. A couple weeks after things started?"
"Probably they made an alliance and a plan to coordinate and then Lightning hung them out to dry," Shima said, nodding to herself.
"Nah. Probably just people being dumb," Fukasaku said. "Hard to coordinate over long distances. Attacks always happen at different times."
"Different by weeks? Don't you condescend to me, you old fool! Sounds more like a false flag to me. Lightning saw their chance, so they attacked Leaf while wearing Rock's headbands. Leaf was already primed after the Collapse; they went at Rock, who fought back, and once the two were embroiled Lightning would have been able to snip off a good chunk of Fire."
"Stop making up crazy conspiracy theories, you old bat! Besides, if it was a false flag then it would make much more sense for it to be one of the minor nations. They've still got that mutual defense pact that Hiru built for them. Right, boy?"
"Uh, I think so, sir."
"Sure. They see that the majors have all been weakened by that Nagi Island disaster, so they stir the pot. If your enemy is the other Elemental Nations, no one is going to want to open up another front against the minors. It doesn't serve strategic needs and just brings more trouble down on you."
"I suppose," Noburi said. Damnit, they'd gotten off track. He was supposed to be bending this around to the Sage and his companions! That was the entire reason that Hazō had asked him to come here. "Anyway, the point is that Ami is able to do all this super impressive stuff, but at least in this case it's because most of the work was already done for her. The Third gave everyone the idea of international cooperation after the First gave them the idea of interclan cooperation after the Sage gave people the chakra to protect themselves." Okay, at least the Sage had been mentioned again. Although a simple 'hey, speaking of the Sage, how about you tell me everything you know about him and his companions' wasn't going to cut it as a segue.
Fukasaku harumphed. "The Sage. Wasn't he a font of good advice and excellent choices?"
"How do you mean, sir?"
"Oh, ignore him," Shima said. "This old coot has been jealous of the Sage as long as I've known him."
"That's not true! You snotty old bat, what do you mean talking me down in front of the boy?!"
"There, there," she said, patting his arm while wearing a smug grin. "I'm sure you're very impressive and stack up well against the living god who created our entire dimension and all the species."
"LOOK—"
"Have you studied the Sage, sir?" Noburi asked, praising his stars for the opportunity. "I admit, I actually know very little about him." He shrugged in self-deprecation. "They teach us that he's the one who created chakra and created the world, but there's not much known about him beyond that. Hazō says that Cannai, the Alpha Dog, gave him a poem about the Sage and talked about these companions he used to tool around with, but I hadn't heard of them before."
"Poem?" Fukasaku demanded.
"Yeah, I think I have it somewhere here. One sec." He made a show of checking various pockets until he found the right stack of storage seals, then riffled through them while counting silently to himself. Mari had drilled him relentlessly on how fast to riffle and how long to 'search' in order to keep the targets interested and heighten anticipation without actively annoying them.
"Here we go," he said, right as the count ended. He unsealed the paper on which Hazō had copied down the words after returning from the Seventh Path.
Unbounded you call me, yet bound I am
Wise One you call me, yet still I err
First Spinner you call me, and this I grant
I have spun your First Tale, my Great Tale
The Tale of Dog and Cat, of Hawk and Hornet.
All tales change and all tales flow
Days wend into weeks or years
Passing time brings losses, cheers
Now must I go, my children all
My bed to make among the men, who need me more.
Flow of fire, standing high
Tower the mighty waves, grave and gray and green
Water's power raised by storm-wind breath
Fire and wave in joyous chorus, the birth of earth to bring
Green the rising life shall grow
Trees of wood and iron and stone
Beware their shade, for my Lost Ones sing.
Beyond the trees my rest shall be
I leave there seven rocks with seven locks
Each rock a treasure's home
Treasures bright shall guidance give
Truth or death, no equal chance
To find the way to me.
Spin on, talespinner! Spin on!
Raise up the mighty word, unite the bounding arc of dream
With reason's bark and incisors bite
From first to last
To tread the path of wisdoms loss
Remember me, speak my name
And when the years have wended wide
Come and find me once again.
Fukasaku snatched the paper from him and read through it, Shima crowding close to read over his shoulder. It was clear when Fukasaku reached the end; he frowned, shook his head slightly, and went back to read it again. Finally, he threw the paper down on the table, prompting a grunt from Shima who hadn't finished yet. She picked it up with a glare at her husband and resumed reading.
"What is this twaddle?!" Fukasaku demanded, not noticing his wife's glare. "What sort of nonsense are they spewing over in Dog? This doesn't make any damn sense!"
"To you maybe," Shima said with a sniff. "For anyone with the slightest trace of romance in their heart, it's perfectly plain."
"And I suppose you think you have romance in your heart? Hah! You wouldn't know romance if it snuck up and bit those purple lips off!"
"I've got more romance than you do! Who remembers our anniversary, hm? Not you, that's for sure!"
"I remember it! I had an entire party for you not ten months ago!"
She thwapped him on top of the head. "Our anniversary is nine months ago, you addled old fool!"
"Don't you hit me, you crazy old bat!" Fukasaku said, rubbing his head. "Nine, ten, whatever! I was rounding!"
"You rounded nine to ten?"
"It's easier to remember!"
"You round to the nearest eight, you idiot!" said the angry and four-fingered toad matron. "Tens are for those freaky humans and their squiggly hands!" She went to thwap him again but he parried with an inside block and jabbed her in the arm with two fingers. She twisted with the attack, robbing it of much of its force, and lashed out with an open-hand slap, which he ducked under before snapping a straight kick that she flowed around, dropping low and rising up on the opposite side with the grace of the greatest festival dancers.
Noburi sat back in his chair, legs crossed at the ankles, and sipped his tea as the two ancient Sages fought their way up and down the room. He'd get his answers once they tired themselves out, but for now he wasn't going to miss the show.
The Toad Sages did eventually tire themselves out and return, grumbling, to their seats.
"If you don't mind me saying so, you two are incredible fighters," Noburi said. "The only human I ever saw who was even close to that level was Maito Gai, and he was widely known as probably the greatest taijutsu master alive."
Both of the centuries-old demigods preened like the worst stereotypes of teenage girls with a new mirror.
"Thank you, boy," Fukasaku said, puffing on his pipe. "We sparred with little Gai a few times. Had some good moves, that one."
"He was nothing compared to our Jirry," Shima said stoutly. "Took us years to teach that boy the Toad Style katas, but once he learned them there was no one on your Path who could beat him when he was trying."
Noburi forebore to say anything about how maybe the reason that no one could beat Jiraiya in taijutsu 'when he was trying' was because Jiraiya didn't actually fight with taijutsu when he was trying—no one who wielded the Rasengan could be considered a taijutsu fighter. You weren't primarily a taijutsu fighter if simply touching your opponent was enough to turn them into itty-bitty chunks.
"I've never been a taijutsu guy myself," Noburi said, trying to sound regretful. "That's Hazō's gig and I'm sure he'd be over the moon if you ever wanted to share any tips or advice with him, or just tell him stories about Jiraiya and how you trained him. He really looked up to Jiraiya. For myself, I've focused on my ninjutsu much more." He made a throwing away gesture with one hand. "Still, that's a little off-track. You guys were telling me about the Sage and his band?"
"We were?" Fukasaku asked.
Shima thwapped Fukasaku atop his tuft of white hair. "Don't be obnoxious, you old goat! You know you can't wait to show off for the boy, so don't tease him on top of it!"
Fukasaku glared at her as he rubbed his head. "Fine, fine," he grumbled. "What about him did you want to know, boy?"
"Anything you're willing to tell, sir. What was his name, who were his friends, did he really create chakra...?"
"Create chakra!" Shima laughed. "Ha! That would be like creating weight, or light!"
"I create light every time I light my pipe," Fukasaku said. "Don't show off your ignorance!"
"That's not what I meant, old goat! I meant creating all light! The very idea of light!"
"But it's not what you said! Ha!"
"Hmph." Shima pushed her chair back and stood up, striding out of the room and into the kitchen. She was back moments later with a plate in either hand, half of a fist-sized treacle tart on each plate. She slid one in front of Noburi and set the other down at her own place. "I was going to cut this in thirds, but rude people don't get dessert."
"Hey!"
"I can split this and you can have—" Noburi froze halfway through offering part of his dessert. Shima's glare promised that his entire being would be reduced to its component elements should he dare to finish the sentence.
"That's not fair!" Fukasaku said. "You can't possibly be this petty!"
"Hmph." Shima delicately lifted the gooey dessert to her lips and took a small bite. "Oh, my. That came out very well. Mm."
"Give me th—" Fukasaku was reaching for Noburi's dessert as he spoke, but he cut himself off and yanked his hand back as Shima's wooden spoon slashed down where his fingers would have been, striking so hard that it cracked the table.
"Don't you dare disrespect a guest and shame our roof!" the toad matron snapped.
"He's our Summoner! It's his duty to—"
"It's not his duty to give you his dessert! If you want dessert then you need to be nice to me!"
"I am nice to you!"
"You think snotting off to me in front of the boy is nice?!"
Noburi coughed into his fist, then focused very closely on his dessert. Both toads stopped their spat to look at him. He "didn't notice" for a few seconds, then looked up in "surprise".
"Yes, sir? Ma'am?"
Fukasaku eyed him sourly for several long seconds while Noburi maintained a completely innocent expression. Finally, the Toad Sage turned to his wife.
"I'm sorry I was snotty," he grunted, his voce extremely sotto.
"Excuse me, what was that?" Shima said, placing a hand to her earhole. "I couldn't hear you."
Noburi coughed into his fist again, once more focusing on his dessert. Once more, the Toad Sages glared at him. Eventually, Shima sighed and turned to her husband.
"I made two tarts," she said. "There's a half on the counter in the kitchen if you want one."
His fuzzy caterpillar eyebrows shot up. He opened his mouth to say something but broke off when Noburi cleared his throat, then took a nibble of the tart and sighed in pleasure, eyes drifting closed as he sampled.
"You've got a real mouth on you, boy," Fukasaku said.
"Sir?" Noburi asked in pretended surprise. "I was just thinking what a delicious tart this is. Well, and how thoughtful Shima was to make something so delicious to share with us, and how nice of her to leave a slice out for everyone. I hope Yuno and I are so happy together when we've been together for as long as you have." He ducked his head in realization. "Well, proportionally as long as you have."
Shima simpered and Fukasaku glowered.
"Oh, very well," Fukasaku said. "The boy's right, I guess. Thank you for making this, Ma. I'm sorry I was snotty."
She leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you, my dear old goat. Go get your slice. Oh, and there's milk in the icebox if you want some."
"Ooh! Excellent!" The Toad Sage vanished in a blur of speed and was back an instant later, his hair trailing after him in the wind of his passage. He was carrying three glasses in his left hand, a pitcher of milk in his right, and had a plate with his tart fixed to his shoulder via chakra adhesion. He proceeded to distribute the glasses and pour them full.
"Pretty ballsy of you, playing marriage counselor," Fukasaku grunted at Noburi.
"Sir? I have no idea what you mean."
Both toads grunted a laugh.
"You had some questions, boy?" Shima asked.
"About the Sage, yes. Anything you know about him, I'd be very interested. Especially about his use of chakra."
The sages exchanged glances and Fukasaku gave his wife a 'go ahead' tilt of the head.
"He didn't invent it," she said. "Chakra has always been there, just like heat or light. It comes in different flavors the same way food does, and it strengthens us the same way too. It's made from life and dances through everything that lives. It swirls and flows like water. It is made of many parts, just like life. What you humans consider chakra is just a tiny fraction of one flavor of chakra. Us Toads, we use far more of it—that's why we call it 'nature chakra', because we use all the flavors. Chakra has motion, currents, and feelings like the sea does." She smiled, nostalgia on her face. "Pa took me sailing on the ocean for our two hundredth anniversary. Just a little boat and the two of us under the stars." She basked in the memory for a moment, then shook it away.
"He didn't invent chakra but he was the first human to master it," she continued. "He worked out how to speak to it—not in words, of course. It's not intelligent." She paused. "Well, not exactly. It's more like..." She thought, then gave up. "It's not exactly intelligent the way you think of intelligence, but it's not mindless like a stone either. It's complicated.
"Anyway, after he learned how to use chakra he shared the knowledge with some of his closest friends. We don't have names for all of them but we know of seven: Dhruv, Avra, Nara, Mori, Yodomi, Raiyoke, and Tama. Very little is known of Dhruv and Avra because they only stayed with the Sage for two years and then they left. Avra went east to lands unknown while Dhruv went west. There's a bunch of different theories on why they left." She gestured to Fukasaku with a 'your turn' nod.
"One idea is that the Sage and Avra—she was the only girl in the group—dated for a while, or maybe she was his wife, and then they split," the old toad said. "Personally, I think it's unlikely. There's only one source for that theory and he was a known fraud about other things."
"I tend to go with Gamashisōka's view," Shima said. "The Sage and his band wanted to save the world. Avra and Dhruv went to map the way, learn about who else was out there, while the others stayed local to where they had been born and focused on coming up with a workable methodology in an environment that they were familiar with."
Fukasaku opened his mouth to snap something, then caught himself. Shima sighed.
"Go ahead," she said.
"There's another theory," Fukasaku said, touching his wife's webbed hand for a brief moment before turning fully back to Noburi. "The Sage and his friends were gathering an army to fight the Tenfold Abomination. Dhruv and Avra were sent away in case the others lost. They were to gather their own forces elsewhere to serve as a second and third chance if the main team fell, try to create secure fallback points for any of the survivors."
"You once mentioned that the Sage created the Seventh Path and all the species," Noburi said, nodding to Shima. "Was that part of his after-war planning? Maybe as a secure bolthole."
Both Sages shook their heads. "She was making a joke," Fukasaku said. "There's plenty of people on this Path who believe it was created by the Sage, or whatever title they call him by since no one knows his actual name. They're all wrong. The Sage wasn't actually a god and he didn't have the power to create entire universes."
"He created the demiverses," Shima corrected. "The ones that the humans use for their storage scrolls."
"He created the method for creating them, he didn't create all of them himself! Besides, that's not a universe."
"How is it not? It's got space, it's got—"
"It's got no time! How can you have a universe that exists for no time at all? You can't!"
"I thought he wasn't a sealmaster?" Noburi asked, trying to head off another violent 'debate' that could endanger the local ecology.
"We don't know for sure," Shima said. "Still, he was clearly the idea man for his team."
"I get that," Noburi said, nodding. "Hazō likes to say that he invented skywalkers because he had the idea, even though it was actually Kagome who did all the work."
"Hey, don't talk down your brother," Fukasaku said, glowering. "Nothing comes into existence until the idea does. Anyone can do the work of creating something once the hard part of inventing it has happened."
"Hah! You just say that because you don't want to share author credit with your researchers!"
"What we know for sure is the Sage and his friends created the Summoning contracts that allowed travel between worlds," Fukasaku said, visibly ignoring his wife's accusation.
"Whether that was intended as an emergency evacuation method or something else, we don't know," Shima said. "And yes, Pa's right that the Sage and his friends gathered an army to fight the Tenfold Abomination. It's not clear if that happened before he decided to end war or after, and it's not clear whether he gave humans chakra so they could fight in the war or after he saw the wreckage of the so-called 'victory.'"
"He didn't give chakra to humans," Fukasaku said.
She rolled massive eyes. "Fine. The Sage had the idea and taught his friends how to use it, but Avra was the one who actually did the work of modifying people."
"It wasn't—" Fukasaku broke off and took a breath. "The medic wasn't Avra, Ma. You know that story is apocryphal! You just like it because you want the girl to be the important one, but the timelines don't match up—the Great Melding clearly happened after the Abomination was defeated, by which time she was long gone!"
Shima sniffed. "She came back, you dingus! It clearly says—"
"Sorry, you keep mentioning the Tenfold Abomination," Noburi interrupted quickly. "What exactly was it? Something like a Tailed Beast?"
"Psh," Shima said as Fukasaku snorted in disgust.
"Tailed Beasts. I think not!" the ancient toad patriarch said. "Those are just the remnants of it after the Sage and his friends ripped it apart."
"Ripped it apart? Remnants?" Noburi echoed, eyes wide. He contemplated what it would mean for the most powerful entities of his world to be mere fragments of something.
"Sure," Fukasaku said. "The Tenfold Abomination was an External. Came from the chaos that is outside the cosmos. There's lots of those things and they keep trying to wiggle into our cosmos. Probably because it's a lot nicer here—"
"Or maybe because we only know about the ones that try to get in?" Shima said archly. "There could be gazillions of the things that are perfectly happily baking their own crazy bread out of the color green and sculpting statues out of childhood night terrors or whatever, and we only hear about the handful that want to smash through the walls of our cozy little home."
"Yes, yes, fine, whatever. Anyway, the thing got in somehow and it was destroying everything. They're poison. Everywhere they go, reality breaks and melts down into slag."
"Are the Dragons Externals?" Noburi asked. "I've seen what their scales do—they poison and dissolve anything they come in contact with."
Shima shrugged. "Maybe?"
"Of course they aren't!" Fukasaku snapped. "Those things are just horrible monsters. They dissolve things, sure, but they don't affect actual reality. Maybe they burn the skin off your hand but afterwards your skin isn't Tuesday."
"You aren't seriously going with that nonsense tablet from Karatoa, are you?" Shima demanded. "He was a drunk and a drug user, and you know it! The whole thing was nonsense, soup to nuts. Of course they are Externals. They're the ones that the Sage bound first. It said so in Volume 3 of Nakae's Annals!"
"That section is an insert by his brother! You can tell by the word choices."
"It is not! That's a dirty lie put out by Gamabobo! He was always trying to tear down Gamaatamai, and discrediting her sources was just part of that."
"Pardon," Noburi said. "You were talking about the Tenfold Abomination?"
"Oh, right," Shima said. "The Sage and his friends defeated it. It's an External, so you can't kill it and imprisoning it is problematic. Instead, they tore it apart. Its body became the Tailed Beasts. Its mind was broken into fragments, carefully divided so that no one chunk could accomplish anything on its own."
"By 'accomplish anything', she means 'go reunite with the other shards and reform the Abomination'," Fukasaku added helpfully.
"I was getting to that! Stop interrupting, you obnoxious old fart!" She looked back to Noburi. "Yes, that. The fragments aren't bound—they're just chunks of a mind, you can't tie ropes around a mind. They could go reunite with the rest of the fragments anytime they wanted and there's no way to prevent that."
"Obviously there's some way!" Fukasaku said. "You can tell on account of reality is still here."
"Fine," Shima said. "Whatever, be difficult. The Sage and his friends didn't want the fragments escaping, and they wanted to make sure that no single individual knew all the details. None of them talked to anyone or wrote down what their method was."
Noburi swallowed nervously. "That sounds very dangerous. In our family we make a point of working together, and we always come up with better ideas as a result. If only one person thinks something up, they're liable to miss something. Besides, most defenses need to be maintained; if no one knows how to do that..."
"Yup," Fukasaku said, an inappropriate amount of relish in his tone. "Reality lives balanced on a knife edge. Any day now, one of the fragments might get out of its prison and reunite with one of its others, then they would all reunite to reclaim and recombine the fragments of their body. A few hours or days later, pop!" He slammed his palm onto the table with an echoing slap. "Reality bursts like a bubble and we're all swept into nonspace to suffer in unending agony forever!" He took a big bite of his tart. "Oh, this is good, Ma! You really outdid yourself."
"It's the cinnamon," she said. "Really gives it that warmth that brings the whole thing together."
Fukasaku's massive tongue explored around his lips thoughtfully, licking up every last trace of the treacle. "Mm, mm! Really good. Is that cloves I taste? Have I told you that you're a genius in the kitchen?"
Shima glowed. "Thank you, dear."
"Um, about the fragments," Noburi said hesitantly. "Nara, Mori, the others...those are clans on the Human Path. They're all descended from one of the Sage's companions?"
"Of course," Shima said.
Noburi thought about that. "How did chakra get given to everyone then?"
"It was a recruiting method," Fukasaku said. "Join the army of the Sage to help save reality, get superpowers."
"Only at first," Shima corrected. "After the battle they tried to give it to everyone in order to balance out power. The theory was that if everyone had power, and at least part of everyone's power lay in understanding each other, there wouldn't be violence or war anymore." She shook her head. "Didn't work, unfortunately. Not everyone was able to accept the gift—or maybe the word is 'willing', it's unclear."
"Or maybe they just didn't get to it before the medic died and they forgot to write down how to do it, just like they forgot to write down so much else, including who they were!" Fukasaku said.
"That could be," Shima agreed. "Of course, it wouldn't have worked anyway. No sooner did you humans get chakra then you started using it to kill each other."
"Yeah, you humans are so violent," Fukasaku said with what Noburi felt was a shocking lack of self-awareness given how he and his wife interacted. "Sure, the chakra that got handed out before the war was all battle-themed, but everything after that was intended to promote harmony. Empathic connection, healing, sharing of minds based on skin contact, awareness of and oneness with the cosmos, that kind of thing. Took about that long"—he snapped his fingers—"before you started using it to crush each other's minds, carve up people's innards, tear secrets out of each others' brains, all that. Bah."
"It might not be completely their fault," Shima said to her husband. "When the Abomination's mind was torn apart and the Sage gathered it into the various fragments, it's quite likely that some tiny scraps were missed. Escaped into the environment and bonded to human bloodlines."
"You're saying that some humans have an External's...dreams, or whatever, corrupting their minds?"
Shima sniffed. "It's a theory."
"It's her theory," Fukasaku said, rolling his eyes. "She's been trying to prove it for sixty years."
"And I'm getting close! You saw what was in those Crow tablets!"
"Ha! Those chicken scratchings are purely bogus! Absolute nonsense! It's not pipeweed that they put in their pipes, if you know what I mean!"
"They are not! Karatoa was a very diligent scholar!"
"Diligent my very manly bottom! He was a lush! In fact, you said that yourself not five minutes ago when I talked about the Dragons!"
The conversation devolved from there until Noburi finally gave up, offered his thanks for the meal and conversation, and escaped to the relatively insanity of the Gōketsu estate. He couldn't help thinking that things were bad when the Gōketsu estate was the sane place.
A/N: This is Velorien's partner posting from his account. Thank you very much to @eaglejarl for helping to complete this draft at the last minute.
Some people, Hazō reflected, were harder to influence than others. Kei would, at worst, tolerate anybody who came to her with carrot cake, and even Lord Hagoromo might leave with the same number of limbs as he arrived if one of those limbs happened to be carrying a box of Pantasia's finest. Asuma was more demanding, requiring an absence of even accidental treason before he could be put in a good mood. Shikamaru, unfortunately, was harder still, since the act of socialising in and of itself risked incurring his disapproval. Given this, and the fact that Hazō couldn't even manipulate the circumstances of their meeting (if he tried, forcing Shikamaru to leave the Nara compound would already earn him minus points), today would demand the very finest performance from Gōketsu Mari's star pupil if he wanted to walk away with any forbidden lore at all.
Hazō: Empathy 21 - 3 = 18
Shikamaru: Deceit ?? + ? = ??
Hazō discovers the personal Aspect "Keeper of the Third Lock".
So it was that Hazō's movements were smooth and relaxed, with no uncalled-for excitement, as he settled down into the visitor's chair in Shikamaru's office, and his tone was friendly but erring on the side of reserved as he gave his greetings.
"Good afternoon, Shikamaru. Thank you for making time for me today."
Shikamaru, after taking a second to extract a bookmark from a drawer and slide it into the middle of a folder marked STAR CLEARANCE ONLY—Hazō not only didn't have Star Clearance, but hadn't even heard of it before—gave a small, weary smile.
"On the contrary," he said. "It is good to see you, Hazō, insofar as I have yet to thank you properly for saving Hagoromo Ritsuo's life."
"I… did?" Hazō asked with an edge of alarm. He could have sworn he'd gone an entire week without any major slip-ups.
"Indeed. I dread to think what might have happened to him had I been unable to make my point through mere threat of Dragon-induced liquefaction—and then the Hokage would have been forced to make my life very difficult."
Hazō took a second to recall the beautiful terror in Lord Hagoromo's eyes as Shikamaru bent him ever closer to an overdue encounter with the Reaper. Lord Hagoromo had taken his revenge as best he could after that, against Hazō at least, demanding compensation for the dagger as if it had been made from chakra metal by the Sage of Six Paths himself. Unfortunately, the cunning snake had made a point of ensuring Harumitsu knew what happened, and rejecting the ridiculous demand when Hazō was technically in the wrong would have made him look even worse in front of his apprentice. The last thing Hazō needed was for the Hagoromo to start regaining their moral superiority over him in Harumitsu's eyes.
"Well," Hazō said, "you're very welcome. Or possibly my sincere apologies, whichever you prefer."
Shikamaru gave a shadow of a smile.
"Now, how may I help you on this occasion?"
"I wanted to pick your brain about something I came across on the Seventh Path," Hazō said. "Cannai, the Dog Boss, once told me a particularly cryptic poem attributed to the Sage of Six Paths himself—whom, you'll remember, some of the oldest summons knew in person. Here, I wrote it out for you."
Unbounded you name me, yet bound am I
Wise One you name me, yet still I err
First Spinner you name me, and this I grant
I have spun your First Tale, my Great Tale
The Tale of Dog, and Cat, of Hawk, and Hornet.
All tales change and all tales flow
Days wend into weeks and years
Passing time bringing losses, cheers
Now must I go, my children all
My bed to make among the men, who need me more.
Flow of fire, standing high
Tower the mighty waves, grave and gray and green
Water's power raised by storm-wind's breath
Fire and wave in joyous chorus, the birth of earth to bring
Green the rising life shall grow
Trees of wood and iron and stone
Beware their shade, where my Lost Ones sing.
Beyond the trees my rest shall be
I leave there seven rocks with seven locks
Each rock a treasure's home
Treasures bright shall guidance give
Truth or death, no equal chance
To find the way to me.
Spin on, talespinner! Spin on!
Raise up the mighty word, unite the bounding arc of dream
With reason's bark and incisive bite
From first to last
To tread the path of wisdoms lost
Remember me, speak my name
And when the years have wended wide
Come and find me once again.
Shikamaru read over the text several times.
"Were it not for the credibility of the source, I would be tempted to dismiss it as a prank. I studied a number of prophecies and similar texts during my training—most are inventions of diseased minds or would-be poets wishing to add mystique to their simian flailing of brush and paper. One must always consider context: would the writer have a reason for conveying important information to these people at this time, and if they did, would they have reason to do so in an obscure and cryptic fashion? You do not see me encoding Nara Clan secrets into rhyme and handing them out to random canines of my acquaintance. If I must share them at all, I do so plainly, in a fashion minimally vulnerable to miscommunication, and only with select individuals in a sufficiently secure environment.
"What is it you believe can be found within this piece of, if you'll forgive me, doggerel?"
"I wouldn't have made anything of it," Hazō said after a few seconds' thought, "if I wasn't already neck-deep in this Great Seal business. But now I am, I have to ask: how many other little surprises has the Sage left for us across the universe? Are there any eldritch horrors running around which we're just lucky not to have come across yet, or more ancient wards with expiration dates about to go by? And then I hear a message allegedly from the Sage talking about 'seven rocks with seven locks', and suddenly I feel like it's really important to know if there are six other existential threats I need to be preparing for.
"Oh," he said, as if his train of thought had been interrupted, "I nearly forgot. I was passing by a bookshop on my way here, and saw that Tetsu Gaku's new work, Meditations on Applied Eschatology, had just come out, so I figured I'd pick you up a copy."
He reached into his bag and pulled out the heavy, leather-bound tome.
Shikamaru's expression brightened slightly as he took it. "Thank you. Losing track of bookshop contents is one of the few disadvantages of leaving the compound as little as possible. One of the sisters would surely have brought it to my attention before long, but I appreciate the gesture."
"No problem," Hazō said. Then, with Shikamaru briefly off-guard, he made a probing move.
"More than anything else," he said, "it's hard to believe how irresponsible the so-called Father of Shinobi's turned out to be. You'd think it would be a no-brainer that when you take responsibility for keeping humanity safe from an abomination, you give it the whole thousand yards instead of just putting the thing behind a giant seal and calling it a day."
"Quite," Shikamaru agreed distractedly as he flicked through the book. "Considering what is at stake if even one such primordial horror breaks free, one would think the Sage would at least leave behind detailed guidance for the maintenance of his works. One should not be forced to reconstruct knowledge vital to the survival of the human species generation by generation, especially when the dangers of experimentation are cataclysmic."
Bullseye. It wasn't an admission that Shikamaru felt a personal sense of responsibility when it came to keeping sealed horrors sealed, but it was a strong enough hint that Hazō felt confident leaning on it in pursuing his objective.
Hazō tags "Keeper of the Third Lock" and spends 2 FP to invoke "Creative Idealist" and "Relics of the Dragon".
Hazō: Rapport 21 + 3 + 3 + 3 - 3 = 27
Shikamaru: Presence ?? + ? = ??
"You're absolutely right," Hazō said. "But I guess that only makes it more important for us, his heirs, to make up for his mistakes. We're entering a new age of hope for humanity, between AMITY, the Nara Future Foundation, the Gōketsu's various projects, and all the other clans I hope we'll inspire to innovations of their own once they see how much we can accomplish. The idea of finally pulling humanity out of its spiral of self-destruction, only to be devoured by some ancient monstrosity that we could have vanquished but didn't… it's unacceptable, simple as that."
"Vanquished?" Shikamaru asked sceptically.
"Vanquished," Hazō said with an edge of challenge. "You saw the remains of the Dragon I showed at the Clan Council meeting. The remains, Shikamaru. The Sage didn't have either the will or the power to destroy Dragons, but a thousand years later, we have both. You and I can sit here trembling in fear, knowing that in a decade, or in a century, or maybe as soon as tomorrow, something will rise up to destroy everything we've built. The clans to which we have a duty, the loved ones we've sworn to protect, the village and the world we're determined to uplift… all of that could disappear at any moment, and we won't be able to lift a finger.
"Or we can make the first move. We can use our intelligence to study the Sage's work and rediscover his arts, the way studying the Great Seal is already providing clues about how 3D sealing is possible. We can gather knowledge to learn our enemies' weaknesses and find ways to destroy them, just like my summon allies and I investigated and then set deadly a trap for the Dragon. There's no safe path either way, but it is possible for us to be in control of our own destinies instead of sitting there waiting for the sand to run out on human civilization.
"That's why I came to you with this, Shikamaru. The first step is to know our enemy. Can you think of any lore that might point at these six other seals? Could there be any on the Human Path?"
Shikamaru didn't respond straight away.
"I must consider," he said, putting down the book to fold his hands in his lap. Hazō recognised the Nara sign language's "processing; do not disturb".
-o-
"Very well," Shikamaru said, finally unfolding his hands after what felt like a lifetime of waiting. "Come with me."
Brushing off all questions, he led Hazō out of the office, out of the main building, and to an unassuming annex near the back of the compound. He stopped only once along the way, to catch another Nara and whisper some kind of instruction (which, again, he brushed off with a muttered "Contingencies").
Shikamaru came to a stop in what looked like a construction materials storeroom at the back of the annex. Shelf after shelf was lined with perfectly ordinary, non-eldritch beams of wood and buckets of tar and paint. As a bemused Hazō watched on, Shikamaru placed a lantern on an empty hook, then turned to face one of the annex's inner walls.
"Shadow Sewing Technique!"
Under the steady light of the lantern, Shikamaru's shadow split into several fine strands that moved on their own with lightning speed, slithering through tiny holes in the wall that Hazō wouldn't even have known were there. A few seconds later, there was a distant click. With a low, melancholy grinding sound, the wall split in two and both parts slid out of the way to expose a stairway down.
"Please be careful," Shikamaru said, leaving the lantern where it was. "It's a long descent, and no shade is permitted where we are heading."
Hazō followed Shikamaru down, holding tight to the handrail in the absolute darkness of the underworld. Above them, the door shut itself again, leaving him at Shikamaru's mercy to get out of here again.
Hazō had previously thought that the staircase down to Orochimaru's Basement was deep. He now realised that he had known nothing of depth, as the pair's journey wore on and his legs began to ache.
"How much longer—"
"Shhh!" Shikamaru hissed. "Do not speak unbidden until we are back at the top."
After a second, he added, "You do not wish to accidentally provide information."
Provide information to whom, Hazō wanted to ask, but despite what his Academy teachers might have believed, he was capable of following direct instructions.
At long last, the descent came to an end. From the sudden shift in the sound of their footsteps, Hazō guessed that they had entered a large, open space.
"Walk forward slowly," Shikamaru said. "Hold out a hand so that you do not run into it face-first."
Hazō obeyed, increasingly wary. If Shikamaru wanted to assassinate him, say, for asking too many questions about unspeakable clan secrets, there would be no better opportunity. He had to count on the fact that people had seen them together today, and while Shikamaru had the authority to swear them all to secrecy, there was still a chance that his second-in-command would find out, in which case he'd quickly join Hazō in the afterlife.
Hazō's hand touched stone. Or was it stone? It felt just a little bit too giving, and oddly warm. As his fingers moved across it, he could feel grooves etched into the material, sweeping lines and deep points forming a pattern he could almost but not quite visualise. In fact, if there was one thing it made him think of…
Shikamaru was saying something in the background, but Hazō found himself less and less interested in what he had to say. This was it, he realised, a second example of a 3D seal. With this for comparison, he had what he needed in order to be able to analyse and decode the Great Seal. It was the clue he'd been waiting for all along.
He couldn't see it, and that meant he couldn't store its image in his mind. Maybe that was the real reason for the darkness. Yes, Shikamaru must have found out about the Iron Nerve's greatest secret. It wasn't something Shikamaru, or anyone outside the Kurosawa, could be allowed to know—Hazō had barely escaped being vivisected for it once already. He would have to do something. Here, in the dark, Shikamaru couldn't use his shadows. There would be no better chance. Nobody could blame Hazō if, after such a long walk, the fatigue combined with the darkness led the boy to slip on the endless stairs and break his neck.
No. No, there was no need to be hasty. There was something much more important to do before he risked combat with the heir of the binders. For the sake of defeating the Heralds, Hazō needed to know what lay behind this seal. All the answers to the mysteries of the world were waiting for him to reach out and take them, if he only removed one trivial obstacle.
Hazō reached for his exploding tags.
-o-
"…A mind so impossibly fractured… hadn't even… first safety threshold… never imagined…"
Hazō was awake. Maybe awake. He couldn't move. He couldn't think right. Something was wrong.
There were two people. They were leaning over him, talking.
"Please, Shikamaru. There's got to be another way. You remember what happened to that genin. I can't…"
Ino. Hazō relaxed. Ino was here. He was safe with Ino.
"You know what's at stake, Ino," Shikamaru said insistently. "I find the necessity appalling myself. This is not a process that should ever be performed on family, nor am I thrilled about the implications of using it on the head of a Leaf clan. But if we do not…"
"…yeah." Ino's voice was pained. Why was Ino in pain? This was important; this was something Hazō had to do something about… but he couldn't move, and he could only barely think. Had he hit his head? Had he been drugged? It was like there was a heavy iron lid over his mind, crushing his thoughts.
"I'm so sorry, Hazō. So, so sorry." Ino leaned over him, and he could see her eyes brimming with tears. What was she sorry for? What was happening? "I… I promise I'll be as gentle as I can."
Ino placed her left hand on Hazō's forehead. It was warm.
"Forbidden Technique: Crimson Purification."
Ino spends FP to invoke "Princess of the Boar Clan", "Mindwalker", and "Lover on an Untrodden Path".
Ino: Crimson Purification ?? + ? + ? + ? + ? = ??
Hazō spends 1 FP to invoke "Toughened Mind".
Hazō: Resolve 38 + 4 - 9 = 33
Hazō spends 1 FP to reroll.
Hazō: Resolve 38 + 4 + 3 = 45
Ino wins. Hazō takes 6 mental stress. He receives the Mild mental Consequence "Stunned" and the Medium mental Consequence "Scoured Brain".
Pulsating tendrils reached from Ino's hand into the crevices of Hazō's mind, slithering into its folds like a million shapeless insects. The headache took only seconds to flare into a migraine, bringing with it intense nausea that reverberated through his entire body. Hazō's fingertips twitched uncontrollably as roiling lumps of black mindstuff that should have been his memories but weren't floated to the surface one by one, to be plucked by the tendrils and mercilessly torn out. He could feel pieces of his self go with them. In the distance, he could hear Shikamaru's voice, emotionless and methodical.
Where was he? What was happening to him? When would it stop?
Eventually, there were meaningless words from meaningless people.
"It's done, Shikamaru. I did my very best, but still… What if—"
"I will have Kei monitor him for side effects. If anything happens, she will contact you immediately."
"Remember, the impressionable state will only last for—"
"I remember, Ino. You should head home. I will take care of the rest."
"Hazō, I am so sorry."
A boy with black hair took his arm and gently pulled him up to his feet. He went with it for lack of any better ideas.
"Come, Hazō."
Yes, that was his name. Kurosawa Hazō. No, that wasn't quite right. Gōketsu Hazō?
"Let us have tea together," the boy said, "and I will explain how we spent the afternoon."
-o-
You have received 3 + 1 (Brevity) + 1 (Fun-to-write) = 5 XP. You have lost 5 FP and received 1 FP for winning a meaningful conflict and 2 FP for taking Consequences.
