Ice Cream break
Growing Pains [DBZ/DC]
- Thread starter Azura
- Start date
Growing Pains - Chapter 38
- Location
- USA
Growing Pains - Chapter 38
Near complete silence was the answer to my entrance. Only the normal sounds of tropical birds and insects in the background and the distant sound of the ocean confirming that I actually had been transported after the mirror dimension-thingy collapsed.
Honestly? Pretty disappointing.
The Circe hologram had made it sound like the mirror was under attack or something I was expecting someone to be – oh, there they were.
The real Circe - I assumed anyway - was standing off to my left along with the familiar trio of Batman, Wonder Woman, and Superman. None of them looking like they were doing anything more than standing around waiting for something to happen. Which was weird because the warning mentioned something triggered some protections, but it didn't look like there had been a fight anywhere…unless…
Crap, how badly did I break the mirror by sequence breaking the labyrinth? Maybe if I don't bring it up they won't know…
"This is the girl that was trapped in the mirror?" Circe snorted. "Well, she's certainly ambitious. Shame about her fashion-sense though…"
Well screw you too lady. "Hey! It isn't exactly easy making something without the right tools. If anything it's your fault for not putting them in there!"
"Califa, is that really you?" Wonder Woman asked before everything devolved into an argument.
I grinned at her and spread my arms and by extension, the cape - so I looked bigger and more imposing. "Of course. After years of imprisonment I am now free to conquer the galaxy! Earth will be the first of many worlds in my new galactic empire!"
"Galactic empire, is it?" Superman chuckled before pointing below me. "And who's your friend?"
I glared at him. "X-ray vision is cheating." because there was no other way he could have known –
"You moved the cape. We can all see her." Batman pointed out.
Donna responded by immediately pushing me off her shoulders and shrugging out of the rest of the costume. "Thank the gods that's over with." She muttered before turning back to one person in particular. "Hello Diana. Do you, uh, do you remember me?"
I caught a few uncomfortable glances passing between most of the adults while a complicated expression formed on Wonder Woman's face.
"No. I'm sorry to say we've never met before."
"Oh."
Now it was Donna's turn to have a complicated expression. We had practiced a few different ways this meeting could go. Wonder Woman completely not recognising Donna at all wasn't one we really considered.
I noticed Wonder Woman opening and closing her mouth like she was trying to figure out how to say something, but she ran out of time. While I had managed to drag Donna out of moping constantly about the whole 'not being a person before stealing a spark of divinity' thing, the fact Wonder Woman left her behind was still a bit of a berserk button.
Something Wonder Woman found out when Donna let the intrusive thoughts win and punched her in the face hard enough to send her flying through the air before charging after her screaming the whole time.
I sighed at that but didn't move to help either way.
If Donna wanted to vent by punching her friend in the face until they worked everything out, I wasn't going to stop her.
"Anyway, while we're waiting for that to wrap up - how are things? How long was I gone and did anything cool happen?" I asked the tense looking heroes.
"Don't you think we should do something about that?" Superman asked, still watching the fight.
I saw that look. Let other people have fun fighting each other, dammit! "Nah, it's fine. Anyway, while they're getting acquainted, details! I wanna know."
"You were gone for two weeks from our perspective." Batman informed me. "Though it looks like it was longer from yours. You've grown."
I preened and straightened up a bit.
He was right! I had finally gone through a growth spurt and didn't have to worry about all the random aches that came with it! At least until the next one.
Now I was just as tall as Donna, which made sparring much more fun since she couldn't just hit me beyond what my shorter limbs could reach, but I noticed I was still shorter than even Circe, the smallest of the welcoming group.
"Yeah, Wonder Woman's Aunt Circe mentioned time worked differently inside the mirror." There was a choking sound as the sorceress in question swallowed wrong and started coughing. "She gave us a message that someone was messing with the mirror and sped up time for us. I was in there for…"
I paused while I counted the time. Batman and Superman looked worried and Circe was still coughing.
"...thirty five days? I think? We spent a while underground, it was hard to keep track."
The two heroes sighed in relief at the only slightly longer timeframe, then winced when I mentioned Donna had been in there for years.
"About that…what Diana wanted to say–"
"No, hold up! Go back!" Circe interrupted, finally getting over her coughing fit. "What was that about me being that brat's aunt? Why would anyone come up with such an obvious lie?!"
I frowned at her. "I mean that's what Donna said you were when we saw that magic recording. And you mentioned that you couldn't wait to rub it in her mom's face that you were the first to congratulate her for passing warrior training so I thought…"
"Urg, well now I definitely know why I couldn't bypass the karma link. Me and Hippolyta getting along?" She actually gave a full body shudder at the thought, but I was confused.
"We determined the mirror originally is from another reality." Batman helpfully explained. "What Wonder Woman was trying to say earlier is that there was no way for her to be the same person your friend thought she was."
"Huh, I wonder if that is going to make her abandonment issues better or worse." I pondered. On the one hand, her Diana probably didn't just abandon her for no reason. On the other, the only other person she thought she knew was actually a stranger.
While I was thinking about what to do about that, there was a boom in the distance from one of the Amazons being slammed into something solid.
"Looks like they finished." Superman noted. "Let's go get them and get your friend up to speed."
"Great! And while you're at it, get off my island!" Circe snapped at us. "I need to go get very drunk so I can forget all about today. Friendly enough to be called that brat's aunt? What a nightmare."
"Kay, bye then!" I gave her a lazy wave and flew off towards where Donna and Wonder Woman were.
If she didn't want us around that was fine. I was just going to grab Donna and drag her to the first all you could eat buffet I could find.
A month without eating was hell. I couldn't even imagine not doing it for years.
-o-
"By the gods, I can't believe I did that…" Donna whined as she hid her face in her hands. "I just…and she was…and then she wasn't even the right person!"
"Donna, I told you, you are forgiven. You couldn't have known and thought I had abandoned you. It's no surprise you were emotional. Besides," Wonder Woman shifted to give me an amused look. "It's nothing I haven't dealt with, with this one before. If anything you gave me more time before attacking than she would have."
For some reason that made Donna blush even more and attempt to hide her head even lower.
I simply ignored her and focused on the mound of potstickers in front of me. Food was more important than banter at the moment.
"Just be careful in the future. Most people would be seriously hurt if you hit them that hard." Superman warned as he focused on his own food, causally blocking my attempt to swipe some of his chicken when I thought he wasn't paying attention.
So I switched targets to Batman, who didn't seem to be all that interested in eating in the first place. Oh well, more for me.
"I wouldn't! I know how to hold back, it's just…"
"We're not blaming you." Batman reinforced. "Just warning you for the future. It's something we remind Califa of from time to time."
"Yeah, yeah. Don't hit someone hard unless they prove they can take it." I waved him off. "Talk later. Food now. And Donna! Try something! You haven't eaten anything in years. I want to know your favorites so we can get you caught up." In a moment of great self sacrifice, I traded my plate filled with some kind of stir fry with her still empty one and shoved a fork in her hand.
"She's right, you know." Wonder Woman commented. "If you want to try a bit of everything you should start now before Califa gets us kicked out. Heroes or not, that only buys us so much goodwill when faced with a hungry Saiyan."
I could only grumble at that.
Stupid lying restaurants. If you're going to have an all you can eat buffet, you should expect to feed someone all they can eat. It's in the name!
"I suppose…" Donna looked uncertainly at her plate but eventually caved and took a bite. Everyone paused to see how the younger Amazon would react to her first meal, even me.
The effect was immediate.
As soon as the flavorful sauces hit her tongue Donna froze before looking down at the stir fry like it was the most amazing thing in the world. Then she started shoveling the food into her mouth as fast as possible, barely taking the time to chew. In less than a minute Donna had practically cleared her plate and began looking for more.
Recognizing the danger, I hovered protectively over my own food and focused on scarfing down my own food while Donna began scavenging from the other three, who were much more accommodating of her stealing food than they were me.
I'd have complained about favoritism, but I didn't miss the little glances Donna was sending my way.
If I showed the slightest weakness, she would strike.
It didn't take long before both of us were scraping empty plates, which meant Donna turned her attention from our table to the buffet line not too far away. My eyes widened when I realized the rest of my food was still in danger from the hungry Amazon.
We locked gazes, and then by an unspoken signal both rushed to refill our plates before everything was eaten by our hungry rival. As I dashed towards the rest of the food I only barely caught Superman sighing in the background.
"Wonderful, now there are two of them…"
In the end we did get kicked out of the restaurant, but for once it was because we had actually finished off all the food they had cooked up and not because they felt like we had been eating too much. I wasn't completely full, but it felt good getting a good meal after going without for so long and especially seeing Donna enjoy herself.
"If that's the kind of food you eat regularly, I can see why you were so upset about nothing in the mirror tasting good." My sparring buddy commented as we left.
"Oh don't worry, I'm going to show you all kinds of great things." I promised. "Next time we'll get the Flash to show us a place. He's really good at recommendations."
Wonder Woman sighed behind us. "Try not to surprise him. Dealing with your appetite is hard enough. The two of you might traumatize him."
"I'll make sure he's compensated while dealing with those two." Batman mentioned. "At least until something more permanent can be established."
I perked up at that. More food with Batman covering the bill meant we could get as much as we wanted! But first…
"Okay, now for dessert! Donna, time to introduce you to the wonderful stuff known as ice cream!"
"Jeeze, they can still eat more? Where do they put it?" Superman commented, but I was busy dragging Donna off by her wrist. Ice cream awaited!
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Near complete silence was the answer to my entrance. Only the normal sounds of tropical birds and insects in the background and the distant sound of the ocean confirming that I actually had been transported after the mirror dimension-thingy collapsed.
Honestly? Pretty disappointing.
The Circe hologram had made it sound like the mirror was under attack or something I was expecting someone to be – oh, there they were.
The real Circe - I assumed anyway - was standing off to my left along with the familiar trio of Batman, Wonder Woman, and Superman. None of them looking like they were doing anything more than standing around waiting for something to happen. Which was weird because the warning mentioned something triggered some protections, but it didn't look like there had been a fight anywhere…unless…
Crap, how badly did I break the mirror by sequence breaking the labyrinth? Maybe if I don't bring it up they won't know…
"This is the girl that was trapped in the mirror?" Circe snorted. "Well, she's certainly ambitious. Shame about her fashion-sense though…"
Well screw you too lady. "Hey! It isn't exactly easy making something without the right tools. If anything it's your fault for not putting them in there!"
"Califa, is that really you?" Wonder Woman asked before everything devolved into an argument.
I grinned at her and spread my arms and by extension, the cape - so I looked bigger and more imposing. "Of course. After years of imprisonment I am now free to conquer the galaxy! Earth will be the first of many worlds in my new galactic empire!"
"Galactic empire, is it?" Superman chuckled before pointing below me. "And who's your friend?"
I glared at him. "X-ray vision is cheating." because there was no other way he could have known –
"You moved the cape. We can all see her." Batman pointed out.
Donna responded by immediately pushing me off her shoulders and shrugging out of the rest of the costume. "Thank the gods that's over with." She muttered before turning back to one person in particular. "Hello Diana. Do you, uh, do you remember me?"
I caught a few uncomfortable glances passing between most of the adults while a complicated expression formed on Wonder Woman's face.
"No. I'm sorry to say we've never met before."
"Oh."
Now it was Donna's turn to have a complicated expression. We had practiced a few different ways this meeting could go. Wonder Woman completely not recognising Donna at all wasn't one we really considered.
I noticed Wonder Woman opening and closing her mouth like she was trying to figure out how to say something, but she ran out of time. While I had managed to drag Donna out of moping constantly about the whole 'not being a person before stealing a spark of divinity' thing, the fact Wonder Woman left her behind was still a bit of a berserk button.
Something Wonder Woman found out when Donna let the intrusive thoughts win and punched her in the face hard enough to send her flying through the air before charging after her screaming the whole time.
I sighed at that but didn't move to help either way.
If Donna wanted to vent by punching her friend in the face until they worked everything out, I wasn't going to stop her.
"Anyway, while we're waiting for that to wrap up - how are things? How long was I gone and did anything cool happen?" I asked the tense looking heroes.
"Don't you think we should do something about that?" Superman asked, still watching the fight.
I saw that look. Let other people have fun fighting each other, dammit! "Nah, it's fine. Anyway, while they're getting acquainted, details! I wanna know."
"You were gone for two weeks from our perspective." Batman informed me. "Though it looks like it was longer from yours. You've grown."
I preened and straightened up a bit.
He was right! I had finally gone through a growth spurt and didn't have to worry about all the random aches that came with it! At least until the next one.
Now I was just as tall as Donna, which made sparring much more fun since she couldn't just hit me beyond what my shorter limbs could reach, but I noticed I was still shorter than even Circe, the smallest of the welcoming group.
"Yeah, Wonder Woman's Aunt Circe mentioned time worked differently inside the mirror." There was a choking sound as the sorceress in question swallowed wrong and started coughing. "She gave us a message that someone was messing with the mirror and sped up time for us. I was in there for…"
I paused while I counted the time. Batman and Superman looked worried and Circe was still coughing.
"...thirty five days? I think? We spent a while underground, it was hard to keep track."
The two heroes sighed in relief at the only slightly longer timeframe, then winced when I mentioned Donna had been in there for years.
"About that…what Diana wanted to say–"
"No, hold up! Go back!" Circe interrupted, finally getting over her coughing fit. "What was that about me being that brat's aunt? Why would anyone come up with such an obvious lie?!"
I frowned at her. "I mean that's what Donna said you were when we saw that magic recording. And you mentioned that you couldn't wait to rub it in her mom's face that you were the first to congratulate her for passing warrior training so I thought…"
"Urg, well now I definitely know why I couldn't bypass the karma link. Me and Hippolyta getting along?" She actually gave a full body shudder at the thought, but I was confused.
"We determined the mirror originally is from another reality." Batman helpfully explained. "What Wonder Woman was trying to say earlier is that there was no way for her to be the same person your friend thought she was."
"Huh, I wonder if that is going to make her abandonment issues better or worse." I pondered. On the one hand, her Diana probably didn't just abandon her for no reason. On the other, the only other person she thought she knew was actually a stranger.
While I was thinking about what to do about that, there was a boom in the distance from one of the Amazons being slammed into something solid.
"Looks like they finished." Superman noted. "Let's go get them and get your friend up to speed."
"Great! And while you're at it, get off my island!" Circe snapped at us. "I need to go get very drunk so I can forget all about today. Friendly enough to be called that brat's aunt? What a nightmare."
"Kay, bye then!" I gave her a lazy wave and flew off towards where Donna and Wonder Woman were.
If she didn't want us around that was fine. I was just going to grab Donna and drag her to the first all you could eat buffet I could find.
A month without eating was hell. I couldn't even imagine not doing it for years.
-o-
"By the gods, I can't believe I did that…" Donna whined as she hid her face in her hands. "I just…and she was…and then she wasn't even the right person!"
"Donna, I told you, you are forgiven. You couldn't have known and thought I had abandoned you. It's no surprise you were emotional. Besides," Wonder Woman shifted to give me an amused look. "It's nothing I haven't dealt with, with this one before. If anything you gave me more time before attacking than she would have."
For some reason that made Donna blush even more and attempt to hide her head even lower.
I simply ignored her and focused on the mound of potstickers in front of me. Food was more important than banter at the moment.
"Just be careful in the future. Most people would be seriously hurt if you hit them that hard." Superman warned as he focused on his own food, causally blocking my attempt to swipe some of his chicken when I thought he wasn't paying attention.
So I switched targets to Batman, who didn't seem to be all that interested in eating in the first place. Oh well, more for me.
"I wouldn't! I know how to hold back, it's just…"
"We're not blaming you." Batman reinforced. "Just warning you for the future. It's something we remind Califa of from time to time."
"Yeah, yeah. Don't hit someone hard unless they prove they can take it." I waved him off. "Talk later. Food now. And Donna! Try something! You haven't eaten anything in years. I want to know your favorites so we can get you caught up." In a moment of great self sacrifice, I traded my plate filled with some kind of stir fry with her still empty one and shoved a fork in her hand.
"She's right, you know." Wonder Woman commented. "If you want to try a bit of everything you should start now before Califa gets us kicked out. Heroes or not, that only buys us so much goodwill when faced with a hungry Saiyan."
I could only grumble at that.
Stupid lying restaurants. If you're going to have an all you can eat buffet, you should expect to feed someone all they can eat. It's in the name!
"I suppose…" Donna looked uncertainly at her plate but eventually caved and took a bite. Everyone paused to see how the younger Amazon would react to her first meal, even me.
The effect was immediate.
As soon as the flavorful sauces hit her tongue Donna froze before looking down at the stir fry like it was the most amazing thing in the world. Then she started shoveling the food into her mouth as fast as possible, barely taking the time to chew. In less than a minute Donna had practically cleared her plate and began looking for more.
Recognizing the danger, I hovered protectively over my own food and focused on scarfing down my own food while Donna began scavenging from the other three, who were much more accommodating of her stealing food than they were me.
I'd have complained about favoritism, but I didn't miss the little glances Donna was sending my way.
If I showed the slightest weakness, she would strike.
It didn't take long before both of us were scraping empty plates, which meant Donna turned her attention from our table to the buffet line not too far away. My eyes widened when I realized the rest of my food was still in danger from the hungry Amazon.
We locked gazes, and then by an unspoken signal both rushed to refill our plates before everything was eaten by our hungry rival. As I dashed towards the rest of the food I only barely caught Superman sighing in the background.
"Wonderful, now there are two of them…"
In the end we did get kicked out of the restaurant, but for once it was because we had actually finished off all the food they had cooked up and not because they felt like we had been eating too much. I wasn't completely full, but it felt good getting a good meal after going without for so long and especially seeing Donna enjoy herself.
"If that's the kind of food you eat regularly, I can see why you were so upset about nothing in the mirror tasting good." My sparring buddy commented as we left.
"Oh don't worry, I'm going to show you all kinds of great things." I promised. "Next time we'll get the Flash to show us a place. He's really good at recommendations."
Wonder Woman sighed behind us. "Try not to surprise him. Dealing with your appetite is hard enough. The two of you might traumatize him."
"I'll make sure he's compensated while dealing with those two." Batman mentioned. "At least until something more permanent can be established."
I perked up at that. More food with Batman covering the bill meant we could get as much as we wanted! But first…
"Okay, now for dessert! Donna, time to introduce you to the wonderful stuff known as ice cream!"
"Jeeze, they can still eat more? Where do they put it?" Superman commented, but I was busy dragging Donna off by her wrist. Ice cream awaited!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Support the Author at Buy Azura a Coffee. ko-fi.com/azurawriting
or over at https://patreon.com/AzuraWriting to read a few chapters ahead in the rotation
Growing Pains - Chapter 39
- Location
- USA
Growing Pains - Chapter 39
As much as I wanted to drag Donna all over the continent and introduce her to my favorite places and people, it was recommended by Wonder Woman that she take a few days to slowly get acclimated to the modern world now that she wasn't stuck in a magical mirror.
Donna, like theresponsible boring person she could be sometimes, agreed and was now on Themyscira getting a similar crash course on what you were, and were not, supposed to do on Earth while probably being told she had a home there if she just wanted to become part of the Amazons.
I wasn't about to get in the way of her finally being able to meet what she considered her people just yet. I knew from our talks how much she wanted to meet other Amazons and be a part of them.
I would just drag her out on a few adventures if she didn't leave on her own in a few weeks.
But that did mean I was once again left on my own with nothing to do once the Justice League members had to go back to their day jobs.
Part of me wanted to run off and find one of the other heroes to bother, I hadn't seen Hawkie or the Sidekick Squad in a while, but those were things I wanted to do with Donna so I held off.
Instead I just kinda wandered down the streets of a random city somewhere on the west coast.
I think one of the Green Lanterns lived here? I hadn't really interacted much with any of them, only briefly dealing with the black dude a couple times and even then it was more him focusing on his job while I just happened to be there then us actually fighting or working together.
I don't think this was his city though. He didn't really seem like a beach town kind of guy. Probably one of the other Lanterns then.
Maybe I should go find one of them?
My plans to find and poke the galactic space cops was interrupted by something crashing down from the sky right in front of me. I immediately jumped back and fell into a fighting stance, ignoring the screaming humans running away from whatever just showed up.
I didn't have the luxury of getting distracted by them because whatever this thing was? I couldn't sense its energy.
A bright pink thing shot out of the dust cloud straight at me and I instinctually ducked under it before leaping backwards to get some more distance. I didn't know what this thing was. I wasn't going to let it touch me just in case it had some kind of super poison on it.
The dust cleared and I got my first good look at what just attacked me.
It was a mostly pink robot…squid?...with some black and metal bits hovering in the air and suddenly I felt cheated. The stupid thing didn't even look tough.
So with a disinterested scowl I raised a hand and shot it with a fairly strong ki blast. Only, instead of exploding like it was supposed to, my energy attack splashed harmlessly over some kind of shield.
Okay, slightly more interested now.
The robot squid shoots forward at me, almost like it was going for a tackle, which I sidestep easily enough. It's fast, but after all the training I've done it's not at a level I really have trouble with. At least until it flipped around and started using its four tentacles to either attack or try to grab me.
I don't know what the things were made of but they were durable enough that all hitting them did was knock them out of the way for a bit and every time I did so I felt a weird electric tingling in whatever I touched them with that was slowly making my arms and legs heavier.
One of the tentacles speared towards my head so I sidestepped out of the way and grabbed the weird not-metal as it passed and used it to heave the squid over my shoulder and into the side of a nearby building. Not that it did much beyond damaging the brickwork.
I scowled as I looked around the street.
Most of the humans had cleared out by now but it was still too cramped to really cut loose without breaking something.
I needed to get to a more open area. Good thing the ocean was right there.
Now just to see if the squid will follow me…
-o-
The good news was that the robot squid was willing to follow me out over the ocean instead of staying in the city so the heroes wouldn't need to lecture me about paying attention to my surroundings after I destroyed the thing.
The bad news was I still had no idea how to destroy the stupid thing.
I didn't feel like going too far away from the coast but once I was far enough away from the city to not worry about hitting a building, I shot the squid with a serious ki blast. One that should have theoretically vaporized a skyscraper if it hit, but just like before the blast scattered harmlessly over the robot after hitting some kind of shield and I was back to square one.
Actually I was a little worse off because my limbs still felt heavy from whatever the tentacles did to them. It was fine for now but eventually it could be a problem. Come to think of it my Ki was moving a little more sluggishly than normal too…
I shoved those thoughts to the back of my mind and focused on the squid. No point worrying about those things if I just got blindsided because I was distracted. Something I was actually pretty annoyed at. I spent so much time trying to make using ki sense second nature that now that I couldn't use it I felt like I was fighting half blind.
The squid caught up and looked like it wasn't going to slow down even as it flipped and spread its tentacles to give it the biggest chance of grabbing me. I didn't know why it seemed so focused on capturing me rather than fighting but that joined the rest of my thoughts in the mental 'for later' box as I counter charged the flying pink robot and punched it in the body right where the tentacles attached to the rest hard enough to cause a thunderclap.
I smiled because for once I actually felt the body deform from the hit. This thing was durable and strong, but I could beat it.
"Okay squiddie, I don't know what your problem is with me. But if you think you're enough to beat a Saiyan warrior, you've got another thi– hey, wait! Where are you going!?"
I was just going for a bit of banter and the thing dove into the ocean!
Did I just scare it off? The last alien I told about me being a Saiyan was those Imperium guys and they went as far as trying to claw pieces of themselves off trying to get away from me. Were Saiyans simply too scary? But this was a robot, it shouldn't even feel fear!
I looked at the water and debated if continuing to fight the alien robot squid was worth following it into the water. On the one hand, it twinged my pride to just let the thing get away after attacking me. But on the other, I wasn't exactly thrilled at the idea of getting soaked just to try and find something that could have run away by now with almost no chance of catching it.
I was just about to give up on finding the robot squid and heading back to the city when I caught a flash of pink on the surface of the water. I had a split second to realize the reflection came from above me before the robot squid slammed into me and wrapped two tentacles around each of my arms.
What…how did it get above me that fast?!
I got my answer seconds later when the second, or rather the first, robot squid burst out of the water and grabbed my legs.
Okay, there were more of these things. Now I knew for sure someone was after me specifically.
Doing my best to ignore the growing numb feeling in my arms and legs, I flared my ki and spun in place before flexing my core and slamming the two robots into each other. My move worked and they lost their grip on me, even better I could see some sparks coming from where the two squids collided indicating some kind of damage. Whatever shield these things used to protect against my energy attacks didn't protect against itself.
"Well, now we know I can break you. Any more friends you want to bring to the party?" I taunted the robots. Not that I was expecting them to talk if they hadn't by now.
They didn't talk but they quickly shut me up when two more robots exploded out of the ocean bringing my opponents up to four.
"That wasn't an actual invitation." I complained and then had to focus as all four attacked at once.
Between sixteen tentacles it was hard to find room to dodge and I ended up tanking a lot more hits then I wanted, but eventually I managed to catch one of them again and started using the rest of the squid as an improvised flail on the other three robots. Without the shields getting in the way I managed to do some decent damage but couldn't take any of them down before the squid I had a hold of ejected the tentacle I had a hold of.
Still, going by the sparks coming off them now a few more solid hits should change that.
Unfortunately I wasn't in much better shape because the whole time I was using a squid to beat a squid, whatever numbing thing the tentacles did had still been going on. I could barely feel my right hand right now and it took actual effort to form it into a fist. And that was after forcibly pushing ki as a sort of barrier to slow down the effects.
I could be in a bit of trouble here…
Then one of the squids broke off and started flying back towards the city for seemingly no reason. That was until I heard the sound of jets in the distance and saw what looked like a human robot flying out towards us. Oh hey, I recognized that thing! It was the knock off battlesuit/Ironman thing the army had!
"Attention Aliens: you are violating United States airspace. Either leave Earth orbit now or if you are unable to break atmosphere, surrender and disarm. You will be held in custody until you can be escorted off-planet." the new arrival blared from a loudspeaker.
Huh, he sounded kind of familiar.
The robot squid close to him flipped and spread out its tentacles, either to block the newcomer from getting closer or in preparation for an attack. Either way, not the right choice as that caused the robot to open fire with some kind of shoulder mounted gatling gun that tore into the pink squid and after a few seconds caused it to explode.
I frowned at that because there was no way some bullets were doing more damage then what I could do. But it happened anyway. Either something about that gun was special or I was missing something.
Another issue for the 'later' box.
The three remaining squids decided this was the last shot they were going to get at me and rushed to go on the attack. But they made a mistake, not only did they group up, they also had given me enough time to gather my Ki.
"KAMEHAME–" I cupped my hands and focused on making the attack as dense as possible to give it the best chance of getting through the damaged shields. Then I let go. "HAAAA!"
Just asI guessed planned, the shields on the squids couldn't hold off a continuous attack and eventually failed. The three squids exploded and without the shields protecting them, the resulting parts were vaporized by the energy attack.
That just left me alone with the new guy. Who I finally remembered the name of.
"Hey, Rhodes!" I half-sang, giving him an exaggerated wave to disguise the fact I still couldn't really feel my limbs. "I see you got a new suit. Does this mean we get to have another match?"
The military drone slowed to a stop and gave me a lookover. "You look familiar. You don't happen to have a younger sister do you? Gets into places she shouldn't be? Likes to break expensive prototypes?"
"You have trouble hearing through that thing?" I scowled at the robot. "It's me, Califa."
"I'm kidding, I'm kidding! But seriously, you look different. No more little monkey girl, huh? You had one heck of a growth spurt from the last time we saw you."
"Thanks! It happened when I spent a month in a magical mirror training device. I met a new friend there too! I'll have to bring her by so she can spar against your new suit too!"
"...magical mirror…? Right, gonna decide that's above my paygrade. Anyway, look sharp kid. We got another UFO dropping on our heads. We'll catch up after we figure out what they want or send them packing."
I looked up and sure enough there was a spaceship heading right for us.
Not a very big one though. So either this was just a landing craft or whoever owned it was just bringing a handful of people. Especially when I saw the size of the two figures standing on top of the ship. Unless there was some serious space expansion wizardry in that ship you weren't fitting more than two or three of the…crab-people? They looked like giant armored crab-people to me at least…in there.
"Attention Aliens," Rhodes announced one more time. "This is Air Force Specialist James Rhodes. You are violating United States airspace. State your intentions or you will be considered hostile."
Going by the look of the armor on these guys I was betting they were the ones behind the robot squid things, and since those hadn't said anything I wasn't expecting these two to either.
So it was a little surprising when one of them held up a golden badge and said, "In the name of the Grand Centauri Empire, the Saiyan girl is under arrest for violation of the Ekelon Accords. Once she is captured we will leave this planet. Stand aside."
Wait. Were these some kind of non-Lantern space cops? Why were they after me, I hadn't even done anything off planet?! And what were the Ekelon Accords?!
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As much as I wanted to drag Donna all over the continent and introduce her to my favorite places and people, it was recommended by Wonder Woman that she take a few days to slowly get acclimated to the modern world now that she wasn't stuck in a magical mirror.
Donna, like the
I wasn't about to get in the way of her finally being able to meet what she considered her people just yet. I knew from our talks how much she wanted to meet other Amazons and be a part of them.
I would just drag her out on a few adventures if she didn't leave on her own in a few weeks.
But that did mean I was once again left on my own with nothing to do once the Justice League members had to go back to their day jobs.
Part of me wanted to run off and find one of the other heroes to bother, I hadn't seen Hawkie or the Sidekick Squad in a while, but those were things I wanted to do with Donna so I held off.
Instead I just kinda wandered down the streets of a random city somewhere on the west coast.
I think one of the Green Lanterns lived here? I hadn't really interacted much with any of them, only briefly dealing with the black dude a couple times and even then it was more him focusing on his job while I just happened to be there then us actually fighting or working together.
I don't think this was his city though. He didn't really seem like a beach town kind of guy. Probably one of the other Lanterns then.
Maybe I should go find one of them?
My plans to find and poke the galactic space cops was interrupted by something crashing down from the sky right in front of me. I immediately jumped back and fell into a fighting stance, ignoring the screaming humans running away from whatever just showed up.
I didn't have the luxury of getting distracted by them because whatever this thing was? I couldn't sense its energy.
A bright pink thing shot out of the dust cloud straight at me and I instinctually ducked under it before leaping backwards to get some more distance. I didn't know what this thing was. I wasn't going to let it touch me just in case it had some kind of super poison on it.
The dust cleared and I got my first good look at what just attacked me.
It was a mostly pink robot…squid?...with some black and metal bits hovering in the air and suddenly I felt cheated. The stupid thing didn't even look tough.
So with a disinterested scowl I raised a hand and shot it with a fairly strong ki blast. Only, instead of exploding like it was supposed to, my energy attack splashed harmlessly over some kind of shield.
Okay, slightly more interested now.
The robot squid shoots forward at me, almost like it was going for a tackle, which I sidestep easily enough. It's fast, but after all the training I've done it's not at a level I really have trouble with. At least until it flipped around and started using its four tentacles to either attack or try to grab me.
I don't know what the things were made of but they were durable enough that all hitting them did was knock them out of the way for a bit and every time I did so I felt a weird electric tingling in whatever I touched them with that was slowly making my arms and legs heavier.
One of the tentacles speared towards my head so I sidestepped out of the way and grabbed the weird not-metal as it passed and used it to heave the squid over my shoulder and into the side of a nearby building. Not that it did much beyond damaging the brickwork.
I scowled as I looked around the street.
Most of the humans had cleared out by now but it was still too cramped to really cut loose without breaking something.
I needed to get to a more open area. Good thing the ocean was right there.
Now just to see if the squid will follow me…
-o-
The good news was that the robot squid was willing to follow me out over the ocean instead of staying in the city so the heroes wouldn't need to lecture me about paying attention to my surroundings after I destroyed the thing.
The bad news was I still had no idea how to destroy the stupid thing.
I didn't feel like going too far away from the coast but once I was far enough away from the city to not worry about hitting a building, I shot the squid with a serious ki blast. One that should have theoretically vaporized a skyscraper if it hit, but just like before the blast scattered harmlessly over the robot after hitting some kind of shield and I was back to square one.
Actually I was a little worse off because my limbs still felt heavy from whatever the tentacles did to them. It was fine for now but eventually it could be a problem. Come to think of it my Ki was moving a little more sluggishly than normal too…
I shoved those thoughts to the back of my mind and focused on the squid. No point worrying about those things if I just got blindsided because I was distracted. Something I was actually pretty annoyed at. I spent so much time trying to make using ki sense second nature that now that I couldn't use it I felt like I was fighting half blind.
The squid caught up and looked like it wasn't going to slow down even as it flipped and spread its tentacles to give it the biggest chance of grabbing me. I didn't know why it seemed so focused on capturing me rather than fighting but that joined the rest of my thoughts in the mental 'for later' box as I counter charged the flying pink robot and punched it in the body right where the tentacles attached to the rest hard enough to cause a thunderclap.
I smiled because for once I actually felt the body deform from the hit. This thing was durable and strong, but I could beat it.
"Okay squiddie, I don't know what your problem is with me. But if you think you're enough to beat a Saiyan warrior, you've got another thi– hey, wait! Where are you going!?"
I was just going for a bit of banter and the thing dove into the ocean!
Did I just scare it off? The last alien I told about me being a Saiyan was those Imperium guys and they went as far as trying to claw pieces of themselves off trying to get away from me. Were Saiyans simply too scary? But this was a robot, it shouldn't even feel fear!
I looked at the water and debated if continuing to fight the alien robot squid was worth following it into the water. On the one hand, it twinged my pride to just let the thing get away after attacking me. But on the other, I wasn't exactly thrilled at the idea of getting soaked just to try and find something that could have run away by now with almost no chance of catching it.
I was just about to give up on finding the robot squid and heading back to the city when I caught a flash of pink on the surface of the water. I had a split second to realize the reflection came from above me before the robot squid slammed into me and wrapped two tentacles around each of my arms.
What…how did it get above me that fast?!
I got my answer seconds later when the second, or rather the first, robot squid burst out of the water and grabbed my legs.
Okay, there were more of these things. Now I knew for sure someone was after me specifically.
Doing my best to ignore the growing numb feeling in my arms and legs, I flared my ki and spun in place before flexing my core and slamming the two robots into each other. My move worked and they lost their grip on me, even better I could see some sparks coming from where the two squids collided indicating some kind of damage. Whatever shield these things used to protect against my energy attacks didn't protect against itself.
"Well, now we know I can break you. Any more friends you want to bring to the party?" I taunted the robots. Not that I was expecting them to talk if they hadn't by now.
They didn't talk but they quickly shut me up when two more robots exploded out of the ocean bringing my opponents up to four.
"That wasn't an actual invitation." I complained and then had to focus as all four attacked at once.
Between sixteen tentacles it was hard to find room to dodge and I ended up tanking a lot more hits then I wanted, but eventually I managed to catch one of them again and started using the rest of the squid as an improvised flail on the other three robots. Without the shields getting in the way I managed to do some decent damage but couldn't take any of them down before the squid I had a hold of ejected the tentacle I had a hold of.
Still, going by the sparks coming off them now a few more solid hits should change that.
Unfortunately I wasn't in much better shape because the whole time I was using a squid to beat a squid, whatever numbing thing the tentacles did had still been going on. I could barely feel my right hand right now and it took actual effort to form it into a fist. And that was after forcibly pushing ki as a sort of barrier to slow down the effects.
I could be in a bit of trouble here…
Then one of the squids broke off and started flying back towards the city for seemingly no reason. That was until I heard the sound of jets in the distance and saw what looked like a human robot flying out towards us. Oh hey, I recognized that thing! It was the knock off battlesuit/Ironman thing the army had!
"Attention Aliens: you are violating United States airspace. Either leave Earth orbit now or if you are unable to break atmosphere, surrender and disarm. You will be held in custody until you can be escorted off-planet." the new arrival blared from a loudspeaker.
Huh, he sounded kind of familiar.
The robot squid close to him flipped and spread out its tentacles, either to block the newcomer from getting closer or in preparation for an attack. Either way, not the right choice as that caused the robot to open fire with some kind of shoulder mounted gatling gun that tore into the pink squid and after a few seconds caused it to explode.
I frowned at that because there was no way some bullets were doing more damage then what I could do. But it happened anyway. Either something about that gun was special or I was missing something.
Another issue for the 'later' box.
The three remaining squids decided this was the last shot they were going to get at me and rushed to go on the attack. But they made a mistake, not only did they group up, they also had given me enough time to gather my Ki.
"KAMEHAME–" I cupped my hands and focused on making the attack as dense as possible to give it the best chance of getting through the damaged shields. Then I let go. "HAAAA!"
Just as
That just left me alone with the new guy. Who I finally remembered the name of.
"Hey, Rhodes!" I half-sang, giving him an exaggerated wave to disguise the fact I still couldn't really feel my limbs. "I see you got a new suit. Does this mean we get to have another match?"
The military drone slowed to a stop and gave me a lookover. "You look familiar. You don't happen to have a younger sister do you? Gets into places she shouldn't be? Likes to break expensive prototypes?"
"You have trouble hearing through that thing?" I scowled at the robot. "It's me, Califa."
"I'm kidding, I'm kidding! But seriously, you look different. No more little monkey girl, huh? You had one heck of a growth spurt from the last time we saw you."
"Thanks! It happened when I spent a month in a magical mirror training device. I met a new friend there too! I'll have to bring her by so she can spar against your new suit too!"
"...magical mirror…? Right, gonna decide that's above my paygrade. Anyway, look sharp kid. We got another UFO dropping on our heads. We'll catch up after we figure out what they want or send them packing."
I looked up and sure enough there was a spaceship heading right for us.
Not a very big one though. So either this was just a landing craft or whoever owned it was just bringing a handful of people. Especially when I saw the size of the two figures standing on top of the ship. Unless there was some serious space expansion wizardry in that ship you weren't fitting more than two or three of the…crab-people? They looked like giant armored crab-people to me at least…in there.
"Attention Aliens," Rhodes announced one more time. "This is Air Force Specialist James Rhodes. You are violating United States airspace. State your intentions or you will be considered hostile."
Going by the look of the armor on these guys I was betting they were the ones behind the robot squid things, and since those hadn't said anything I wasn't expecting these two to either.
So it was a little surprising when one of them held up a golden badge and said, "In the name of the Grand Centauri Empire, the Saiyan girl is under arrest for violation of the Ekelon Accords. Once she is captured we will leave this planet. Stand aside."
Wait. Were these some kind of non-Lantern space cops? Why were they after me, I hadn't even done anything off planet?! And what were the Ekelon Accords?!
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Growing Pains - Chapter 40
- Location
- USA
Growing Pains - Chapter 40
Despite what I was expecting after giant crab space cops showing up calling for my arrest, we actually didn't break out into another fight.
Someone back at whatever base Rhodes was piloting the suit from had taken over his speakers and had started spitting legal talk at the crab people who started spitting it right back.
I lost track of the conversation the first time they mentioned clause c of subsection; who cares, and hadn't been able to figure out anything since.
Especially because both sides eventually seemed to default to 'wait until a Green Lantern showed up to deal with this' once the military dude let it slip they had contacted one.
They wouldn't even let me leave either!
The crab guys because they still wanted to arrest me, and the military guys because they didn't want to be responsible for an invasion if the crab guys came after me anyway.
They did agree to move this whole standoff to the beach though, which was nice because I couldn't feel my toes anymore. Ki control was letting me move mostly normally, but it felt like everything was half-asleep.
I didn't like it, hopefully it wore off soon.
Finally, after what felt like hours, I saw a flash of green heading towards us marking the arrival of the Lantern we were waiting on.
Not the one I expected though, because it was the same guy from the Imperium invasion and the H.I.V.E. thing and not the white dude with the mask.
"Sorry for the wait," GL said as he touched down. "I'm Green Lantern 2814-2 Stewart. I got word of a jurisdictional dispute?"
"Greetings Lantern Stewart, we are members of the Centauri Police sent to deal with a violation of the Ekelon Accords. Which this planet's military is blocking us from enforcing."
"No offense, Crab-bucket, but we aren't just going to let you launch drone strikes into an American city because you say you can." Rhodes sniped from the side. I guess he got control of the microphone back for a bit. "And GL, can you explain to them that they need to say what they are here for in plain words? Because they and the legal eggheads keep going back and forth over a bunch of codes or references to those Ekelon Accords, which our best and brightest are pretty sure Earth hasn't signed so…"
"Not true." One of the crabs said, taking a step forward. "King Ἀλέξανδρος signed the accords several hundred years ago. As the majority ruler of the planet at the time, that was sufficient for Earth to be included."
"King who?" Rhodes asked at the same time Green Lantern groaned and covered his face with a hand.
"King Ἀλέξανδρος, or King Alexander the III, also known as Alexander the Great. At the time he could have been considered influential enough to sign for the entire planet…as long as the person asking him to sign was shifty enough to not care that they were a bronze-age civilization to get another signatory attached to their name."
"So what does that mean?" I asked, still lost with all the legal talk.
"Earth is technically part of the Accords, they have the right to respond to major breaches if there is no leader or nation in control of most of the planet."
"And the United States doesn't count?" Rhodes asked petulantly.
"The US, the EU, Russia, China. All of them are close enough that one of them can't be considered the undisputed ruler of Earth."
"Try not to let the Brass hear you say that. You'll bruise their egos."
"Now that this has been cleared up, will you stand aside so we can do our duty?" Left crab demanded, raising his bigger claw in my direction.
Rhodes moves to block him but is held back by Green Lantern. "Hold it, hotshot. Let's finish hearing them out." He turned back to the crabs. "What breach exactly are you responding to?"
"Article seven; clause four, subsection thirty seven."
Green Lantern looked confused as his ring no doubt gave him the information what that actually meant. "The removal of invasive megafauna threatening to destroy a garden world? That should only apply to non-sapients…"
"Or species that cannot be reasoned with and found in small numbers. Saiyans are on the list." Left crab interjected. I don't think I liked him. "You're lucky we detected her this early in the lunar cycle, she may seem reasonable now but Saiyans are savages that won't hesitate to destroy everything around them."
"That's racist." I couldn't help but comment. I was starting to get annoyed about people talking like I wasn't here.
"Tell that to the people of Sideralux after you Saiyans leveled half the planet fifty years ago."
"Enough," Right crab stepped in front of his partner. "We've given our reasons for targeting the girl. Are you going to stand in our way or not?"
"Two cyborg crab people picking on a kid? You bet I'm gonna–" Rhodes started before his suit locked up and stood, well, robotically. "Now that this is a confirmed law enforcement operation the US Air Force will stay out of the matter for now. Any action outside of securing the Saiyan will be considered a hostile act, if you plan on further operations on Earth contact the United States government ahead of time so we can avoid a repeat of this unfortunate situation." A different voice, one I recognised as one of the lawyers, spoke up. And then the robot flew up into the air and started heading back towards the city.
I guess that means Rhodes got his suit taken away. Sucks for him.
"And you Lantern Stewart?"
"Are you requesting my help?"
"As if we need the help of a Lantern that couldn't even realize a Saiyan was on his home planet. We don't need you or your help." Leftie cut in aggressively. "Just don't get in our way."
To my surprise Green Lantern just shrugged and took a step back. "Alright, just had to ask for the record." Then he turned to me. "Try not to hurt them too badly, kid."
Oh. Oooooh! I see what he did there. I just got the green - heh - light to kick these two's butts off the planet and now they couldn't even complain about it because they told GL to get lost.
He was cooler than I thought…
I looked over at the crabs and made a show of cracking my knuckles - I could mostly feel my hands again by now - and made a 'come get me' gesture at them.
Leftie didn't hesitate to point his larger claw at me and charged. But he was even slower than the robot squids so it was easy to leap to the side and blast him in the back with a simple ki ball when he missed. His partner had a better idea by shooting some sort of weird translucent green tentacle out of his own claw, but after dealing with the effects of the robot ones I didn't doubt for a second there wasn't more to the thing than just an attempt to tie me up.
So I crashed back to the ground and used it to kick off so I went low under his guard.
I gave him points for not panicking at me suddenly getting so close by attacking instead of flinching away, but once again he was too slow and his giant claw arm/weapon smashed into the sand behind me half a second before I buried my fist into his stomach area.
Even after my recent growth spurt I needed to fly a bit to pick the crab guy up and not drag part of him on the ground. These guys were tall.
And strangely heavy, too.
But that didn't stop me from throwing the guy into his more impatient partner who had just recovered from my ki blast.
They went down in an explosion of sand and tangled limbs and I couldn't help but feel disappointed. Shouldn't these guys be tougher than the robots from earlier?
"I don't suppose you want to join their side?" I asked Green Lantern. "Make it a bit more interesting for everyone?"
He just gave me a blank look and raised an eyebrow.
Guess that was a no.
A laser beam shooting between us had me snap my focus back to the policecrabs, but they were either more shaken up from the hits I gave them and getting thrown around than I thought they'd be or they were terrible shots because I was able to dodge all of them just by flying around a bit.
At least that was what I thought until the heavily damaged robot squid I thought Rhodes destroyed slammed into me from behind!
"Quick, restrain her!"
I spat sand out of my mouth and stood just in time for one of the policecrabs to shoot that green tentacle thing at me and this time I couldn't dodge. The thing wrapped around my upper body and I suddenly found myself with my arms pinned and a lot more tired than I had been a second ago.
Not a big deal though, I didn't need my hands to beat these two.
I jumped into the air – and then fell right on my face when I couldn't direct my ki to fly.
That's what these tentacles did! They suppressed energy somehow!
I couldn't even curse the crabs out because the tentacle had covered my mouth, so I did the first thing that came to mind and bit down on the thing as hard as I could…
Bleh…that was a mistake. Stupid tentacle tasted like burnt rubber and had basically the same feel too. But now that I got a good grip on the end, and if I used my tail just so…
"We got her! Bring the ship around so we can get her in the containment field. Let's get off this planet before she pulls any more tricks." One of the crabs said, I didn't even care who it was anymore.
"On the way. Returning the capture probe too." The other replied, pressing a button that had the damaged squid robot also head for the incoming ship.
They were in a rush. Probably because they didn't want Green Lantern stepping in for some reason, but they should have been paying more attention to me. When the crab closest to me went to pick me up I kicked my legs around and drove my knee into his chest. Their fancy tech could stop me from using Ki in most ways, it did nothing against my base strength. He folded in half before I used him as a springboard to launch myself at his partner.
I blocked the swipe of his claw with one leg and then used it as a platform to kick his guard out of the way. Then I bounced around him delivering kicks to his face, chest, arms…pretty much any target I had a clear shot at while he flailed around until he made one more desperate stab at me with his claw arm that glanced off the tentacle wrapped around my chest.
With a twist of my neck and my tail, I was able to use the bit of room the crab's claw had created to loosen the tentacle enough to move my arms so I could rip the whole thing off me.
Freed and able to use my ki once again, I flew low over the ground where I grabbed the crab by his leg and then went straight up. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the other policecrab trying to work the control pad so I interrupted that by doing the first thing that went through my mind.
I threw his partner at him.
It certainly stopped him from finishing what he was doing, but I guess suddenly getting hit with his partner made him hit the wrong button because there was a loud crash in their ship followed by an explosion. One of the engines cut out and the thing looked like it was going to fall out of the sky…
…right on top of the policecrabs…
Ah, dammit.
I quickly flew down and grabbed each of the crabs by the first limb I could get a solid grip on and got out of there before the ship hit the beach. At first it looked like it came out of the crash with nothing worse than some dents and scratched paint, but whatever caused the first explosion rattled out of a hatch and I had a split second to see the even more damaged robot squid before it blew up again and completely ruined one of the engines.
I guess they were trying to bring it out to cheapshot me again and something went wrong? Meh.
"So ready to keep going? Or you two wanna give up?" I asked as they picked themselves off the ground.
"Why don't we call it here." Green Lantern said, flying over and separating us with a transparent wall from his ring. "I think it's pretty clear if she wanted to, Califa could have wiped the floor with you in seconds. Instead she held back and even saved your lives. I think that's proof enough that her being here isn't a violation of the Ekelon Accords."
The policecrabs looked at each other and then at the wreck of their ship that had almost crushed them. "...Agreed," The calmer of the two said eventually. "We'll have to report this incident and we can't guarantee that the Centauri Police Headquarters will make a permanent exception, but we won't be taking any more action against this Saiyan today. As a reward for behaviors that go against the norms for her species."
"This mean we're done fighting?" I asked and scowled when I got three nods in return, "Lame."
"Same bad attitude as other Saiyans though." The second crab grumbled. I ignored him though.
I stuck around as GL helped them get their ship back up and running and gave the crabs a cheeky wave as they flew off into space. I even told them if they ever wanted a rematch they knew where to find me, much to the second crab's annoyance.
Too bad for him.
"You shouldn't antagonize them too much, they can make your life pretty difficult if they want." Green Lantern said.
I raised an eyebrow at him, "I thought they said I wasn't breaking those accord things, shouldn't that be the end of it?"
"Yeah, unless their bosses disagree." GL nodded. "But what they can do is put a capture bounty on you for a whole lot of other reasons. Earth doesn't really have a spokesperson to tell the Centauri Empire they can't."
"So I might get random aliens coming here to fight me? Cool!"
GL just sighed at my response. "All right kid, why don't you clear out while I finish cleaning up here? And try staying out of trouble?"
"I mean I could, oooor do you want to have a spar? That last fight kinda ended too easily and I haven't fought a Green Lantern yet!"
GL just ruffled my hair while giving my head a shove and took off over the beach while a beam of green energy scanned the area.
"Is that a 'no' then?"
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Despite what I was expecting after giant crab space cops showing up calling for my arrest, we actually didn't break out into another fight.
Someone back at whatever base Rhodes was piloting the suit from had taken over his speakers and had started spitting legal talk at the crab people who started spitting it right back.
I lost track of the conversation the first time they mentioned clause c of subsection; who cares, and hadn't been able to figure out anything since.
Especially because both sides eventually seemed to default to 'wait until a Green Lantern showed up to deal with this' once the military dude let it slip they had contacted one.
They wouldn't even let me leave either!
The crab guys because they still wanted to arrest me, and the military guys because they didn't want to be responsible for an invasion if the crab guys came after me anyway.
They did agree to move this whole standoff to the beach though, which was nice because I couldn't feel my toes anymore. Ki control was letting me move mostly normally, but it felt like everything was half-asleep.
I didn't like it, hopefully it wore off soon.
Finally, after what felt like hours, I saw a flash of green heading towards us marking the arrival of the Lantern we were waiting on.
Not the one I expected though, because it was the same guy from the Imperium invasion and the H.I.V.E. thing and not the white dude with the mask.
"Sorry for the wait," GL said as he touched down. "I'm Green Lantern 2814-2 Stewart. I got word of a jurisdictional dispute?"
"Greetings Lantern Stewart, we are members of the Centauri Police sent to deal with a violation of the Ekelon Accords. Which this planet's military is blocking us from enforcing."
"No offense, Crab-bucket, but we aren't just going to let you launch drone strikes into an American city because you say you can." Rhodes sniped from the side. I guess he got control of the microphone back for a bit. "And GL, can you explain to them that they need to say what they are here for in plain words? Because they and the legal eggheads keep going back and forth over a bunch of codes or references to those Ekelon Accords, which our best and brightest are pretty sure Earth hasn't signed so…"
"Not true." One of the crabs said, taking a step forward. "King Ἀλέξανδρος signed the accords several hundred years ago. As the majority ruler of the planet at the time, that was sufficient for Earth to be included."
"King who?" Rhodes asked at the same time Green Lantern groaned and covered his face with a hand.
"King Ἀλέξανδρος, or King Alexander the III, also known as Alexander the Great. At the time he could have been considered influential enough to sign for the entire planet…as long as the person asking him to sign was shifty enough to not care that they were a bronze-age civilization to get another signatory attached to their name."
"So what does that mean?" I asked, still lost with all the legal talk.
"Earth is technically part of the Accords, they have the right to respond to major breaches if there is no leader or nation in control of most of the planet."
"And the United States doesn't count?" Rhodes asked petulantly.
"The US, the EU, Russia, China. All of them are close enough that one of them can't be considered the undisputed ruler of Earth."
"Try not to let the Brass hear you say that. You'll bruise their egos."
"Now that this has been cleared up, will you stand aside so we can do our duty?" Left crab demanded, raising his bigger claw in my direction.
Rhodes moves to block him but is held back by Green Lantern. "Hold it, hotshot. Let's finish hearing them out." He turned back to the crabs. "What breach exactly are you responding to?"
"Article seven; clause four, subsection thirty seven."
Green Lantern looked confused as his ring no doubt gave him the information what that actually meant. "The removal of invasive megafauna threatening to destroy a garden world? That should only apply to non-sapients…"
"Or species that cannot be reasoned with and found in small numbers. Saiyans are on the list." Left crab interjected. I don't think I liked him. "You're lucky we detected her this early in the lunar cycle, she may seem reasonable now but Saiyans are savages that won't hesitate to destroy everything around them."
"That's racist." I couldn't help but comment. I was starting to get annoyed about people talking like I wasn't here.
"Tell that to the people of Sideralux after you Saiyans leveled half the planet fifty years ago."
"Enough," Right crab stepped in front of his partner. "We've given our reasons for targeting the girl. Are you going to stand in our way or not?"
"Two cyborg crab people picking on a kid? You bet I'm gonna–" Rhodes started before his suit locked up and stood, well, robotically. "Now that this is a confirmed law enforcement operation the US Air Force will stay out of the matter for now. Any action outside of securing the Saiyan will be considered a hostile act, if you plan on further operations on Earth contact the United States government ahead of time so we can avoid a repeat of this unfortunate situation." A different voice, one I recognised as one of the lawyers, spoke up. And then the robot flew up into the air and started heading back towards the city.
I guess that means Rhodes got his suit taken away. Sucks for him.
"And you Lantern Stewart?"
"Are you requesting my help?"
"As if we need the help of a Lantern that couldn't even realize a Saiyan was on his home planet. We don't need you or your help." Leftie cut in aggressively. "Just don't get in our way."
To my surprise Green Lantern just shrugged and took a step back. "Alright, just had to ask for the record." Then he turned to me. "Try not to hurt them too badly, kid."
Oh. Oooooh! I see what he did there. I just got the green - heh - light to kick these two's butts off the planet and now they couldn't even complain about it because they told GL to get lost.
He was cooler than I thought…
I looked over at the crabs and made a show of cracking my knuckles - I could mostly feel my hands again by now - and made a 'come get me' gesture at them.
Leftie didn't hesitate to point his larger claw at me and charged. But he was even slower than the robot squids so it was easy to leap to the side and blast him in the back with a simple ki ball when he missed. His partner had a better idea by shooting some sort of weird translucent green tentacle out of his own claw, but after dealing with the effects of the robot ones I didn't doubt for a second there wasn't more to the thing than just an attempt to tie me up.
So I crashed back to the ground and used it to kick off so I went low under his guard.
I gave him points for not panicking at me suddenly getting so close by attacking instead of flinching away, but once again he was too slow and his giant claw arm/weapon smashed into the sand behind me half a second before I buried my fist into his stomach area.
Even after my recent growth spurt I needed to fly a bit to pick the crab guy up and not drag part of him on the ground. These guys were tall.
And strangely heavy, too.
But that didn't stop me from throwing the guy into his more impatient partner who had just recovered from my ki blast.
They went down in an explosion of sand and tangled limbs and I couldn't help but feel disappointed. Shouldn't these guys be tougher than the robots from earlier?
"I don't suppose you want to join their side?" I asked Green Lantern. "Make it a bit more interesting for everyone?"
He just gave me a blank look and raised an eyebrow.
Guess that was a no.
A laser beam shooting between us had me snap my focus back to the policecrabs, but they were either more shaken up from the hits I gave them and getting thrown around than I thought they'd be or they were terrible shots because I was able to dodge all of them just by flying around a bit.
At least that was what I thought until the heavily damaged robot squid I thought Rhodes destroyed slammed into me from behind!
"Quick, restrain her!"
I spat sand out of my mouth and stood just in time for one of the policecrabs to shoot that green tentacle thing at me and this time I couldn't dodge. The thing wrapped around my upper body and I suddenly found myself with my arms pinned and a lot more tired than I had been a second ago.
Not a big deal though, I didn't need my hands to beat these two.
I jumped into the air – and then fell right on my face when I couldn't direct my ki to fly.
That's what these tentacles did! They suppressed energy somehow!
I couldn't even curse the crabs out because the tentacle had covered my mouth, so I did the first thing that came to mind and bit down on the thing as hard as I could…
Bleh…that was a mistake. Stupid tentacle tasted like burnt rubber and had basically the same feel too. But now that I got a good grip on the end, and if I used my tail just so…
"We got her! Bring the ship around so we can get her in the containment field. Let's get off this planet before she pulls any more tricks." One of the crabs said, I didn't even care who it was anymore.
"On the way. Returning the capture probe too." The other replied, pressing a button that had the damaged squid robot also head for the incoming ship.
They were in a rush. Probably because they didn't want Green Lantern stepping in for some reason, but they should have been paying more attention to me. When the crab closest to me went to pick me up I kicked my legs around and drove my knee into his chest. Their fancy tech could stop me from using Ki in most ways, it did nothing against my base strength. He folded in half before I used him as a springboard to launch myself at his partner.
I blocked the swipe of his claw with one leg and then used it as a platform to kick his guard out of the way. Then I bounced around him delivering kicks to his face, chest, arms…pretty much any target I had a clear shot at while he flailed around until he made one more desperate stab at me with his claw arm that glanced off the tentacle wrapped around my chest.
With a twist of my neck and my tail, I was able to use the bit of room the crab's claw had created to loosen the tentacle enough to move my arms so I could rip the whole thing off me.
Freed and able to use my ki once again, I flew low over the ground where I grabbed the crab by his leg and then went straight up. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the other policecrab trying to work the control pad so I interrupted that by doing the first thing that went through my mind.
I threw his partner at him.
It certainly stopped him from finishing what he was doing, but I guess suddenly getting hit with his partner made him hit the wrong button because there was a loud crash in their ship followed by an explosion. One of the engines cut out and the thing looked like it was going to fall out of the sky…
…right on top of the policecrabs…
Ah, dammit.
I quickly flew down and grabbed each of the crabs by the first limb I could get a solid grip on and got out of there before the ship hit the beach. At first it looked like it came out of the crash with nothing worse than some dents and scratched paint, but whatever caused the first explosion rattled out of a hatch and I had a split second to see the even more damaged robot squid before it blew up again and completely ruined one of the engines.
I guess they were trying to bring it out to cheapshot me again and something went wrong? Meh.
"So ready to keep going? Or you two wanna give up?" I asked as they picked themselves off the ground.
"Why don't we call it here." Green Lantern said, flying over and separating us with a transparent wall from his ring. "I think it's pretty clear if she wanted to, Califa could have wiped the floor with you in seconds. Instead she held back and even saved your lives. I think that's proof enough that her being here isn't a violation of the Ekelon Accords."
The policecrabs looked at each other and then at the wreck of their ship that had almost crushed them. "...Agreed," The calmer of the two said eventually. "We'll have to report this incident and we can't guarantee that the Centauri Police Headquarters will make a permanent exception, but we won't be taking any more action against this Saiyan today. As a reward for behaviors that go against the norms for her species."
"This mean we're done fighting?" I asked and scowled when I got three nods in return, "Lame."
"Same bad attitude as other Saiyans though." The second crab grumbled. I ignored him though.
I stuck around as GL helped them get their ship back up and running and gave the crabs a cheeky wave as they flew off into space. I even told them if they ever wanted a rematch they knew where to find me, much to the second crab's annoyance.
Too bad for him.
"You shouldn't antagonize them too much, they can make your life pretty difficult if they want." Green Lantern said.
I raised an eyebrow at him, "I thought they said I wasn't breaking those accord things, shouldn't that be the end of it?"
"Yeah, unless their bosses disagree." GL nodded. "But what they can do is put a capture bounty on you for a whole lot of other reasons. Earth doesn't really have a spokesperson to tell the Centauri Empire they can't."
"So I might get random aliens coming here to fight me? Cool!"
GL just sighed at my response. "All right kid, why don't you clear out while I finish cleaning up here? And try staying out of trouble?"
"I mean I could, oooor do you want to have a spar? That last fight kinda ended too easily and I haven't fought a Green Lantern yet!"
GL just ruffled my hair while giving my head a shove and took off over the beach while a beam of green energy scanned the area.
"Is that a 'no' then?"
----------------------------------------------------------------------
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Growing Pains - Chapter 41
- Location
- USA
Growing Pains - Chapter 41
I slowly breathed in and focused on my Ki, trying to feel how it responded to various pokes and prods as I tried to get it to do what I wanted. I had been doing this kind of thing for a while, but I was still mostly making it up as I went. This was something very different from the techniques I normally used.
Instead of gathering it all to one point and letting it burst out, I focused on spreading it evenly throughout my body. Then once I felt that was good enough, I focused on raising my Ki as smoothly as I could.
In theory this should–
Almost instantly the Ki destabilized and erupted outward in every direction. I opened my eyes and frowned at the small crater I was sitting in.
Failed again.
"AAAAHHHH, I don't get it!" I complained, flopping on my back and rolling around while I pulled at my hair. Why were techniques that didn't involve blasting something so much harder?! And to make things worse I couldn't just go find someone and pester them into teaching me what I was doing wrong, no one I knew of used Ki!
Maybe I should just wander around China for a bit and see if I could stumble across a Cultivator sect or something? Were those even a thing here?
I stretched out on the ground and sighed, taking a moment to just watch the clouds go by.
China could be interesting, but they didn't advertise superhumans like America did. I would have to actually search the whole country for who I was looking for. And that was assuming they weren't hiding out in some pocket dimension or something that would make me walk right by them. My scouter couldn't find anything at least, which was really annoying because that was supposed to be the one thing it was good for and it was useless when I needed it.
Which meant I was probably just going to waste more time wandering around the Chinese mountains without anything to show for it. Not exactly my idea of fun. Though maybe if I brought Donna or some of the Sidekick Squad?
We could make a whole training journey of it! I could find someone to teach me how to do the weirder things with Ki. Donna and I could try out all the different types of food, Kid Flash would probably enjoy that too. Speedy and Birdbrain would probably like the chance to see magical bows and bo staves. And Aqualad…
Well, there would probably be something interesting to him somewhere. I didn't really know the guy yet.
No, Donna was still on Themyscira and it was the middle of the week so the Sidekicks were probably still in school…
And sitting in the woods trying to get this technique to work was pretty much a waste of time right now. So training was kind of a bust.
There were other things I could do, speed and strength training, Ki control, finishing up the Destructo Disk…but none of that really sounded like fun at the moment.
I needed something to do that would let me unwind and clear my head so I could get back to training later.
Welp, time to go bother Superman then.
-o-
The problem with reporters was that they tended to leave looking for things to report on. They didn't just conveniently wait in the Daily Planet building for me to swing by.
I spent the better part of the morning crisscrossing Metropolis looking for Superman which was a lot harder to do when he wasn't flying around and I wasn't even sure he was in the city. I did eventually find him driving in a car along the coast with Lois and some fat old guy.
Guess that meant more waiting. Couldn't exactly call out Superman now and blow his secret identity. He was a jerk and probably evil, but you had to respect the identity rules. Besides I liked Lois, I wouldn't want her mad at me because I blew her boyfriend's secret to some random old guy.
Actually, did Lois know Superman and Clark Kent were the same person yet? I don't think I ever asked…
A loud bang interrupted my thoughts and I looked down to see a truck careening towards the car. One of its tires had blown out and the driver lost control and I could only curse at the situation because I was too far away to actually help.
Lois was down there so Superman wouldn't let anything actually bad happen, but explaining things would be really awkward.
The truck driver fought to avoid hitting the much smaller car, and for the most part he did, but there was simply no room for even Superman's reflexes to make it so the two vehicles didn't collide. The front left bumper of the truck hit the back left of the car and sent it into a spin before it smashed into the guard rail and stopped. The car only went a little bit further before it also hit the rail, pinning the driver side and almost going off the side of the cliff.
But it didn't look like anyone was hurt, Lois and the old guy were getting out of the car and the truck driver seemed fine. So that was good. Now, how to show up and call out Superman without blowing his identity and–
*BOOM!*
"Oh come on!" I screamed as the truck suddenly exploded. The three people were fine, just pushed to the ground. But the explosion was enough to send the car over the edge of the cliff.
With Superman still inside.
That wasn't a big deal. A little drop wasn't going to hurt him, but it probably would a normal squishy human. And because I had stopped to think after the crash, I was still too far away to do anything! Maybe just get there as fast as possible and have us both pretend I caught him so we could avoid awkward questions and he could repay me with a more serious spar.
With how fast I was going now it wouldn't be too obvious that I didn't catch–
A red and blue blur whizzed past me and my brain stalled out as I saw Superman come up over the cliff with a slightly disheveled Clark Kent.
…What?
I wasn't the only one confused. Lois was looking between the two and Clark obviously looked a bit shaken up.
"There you go, maybe next time just watch your step. Right Mr. Kent?" Superman said with a smile as he set the other man down on solid ground.
"Uh, yeah. I'll do my best." The reporter chuckled awkwardly.
…What?
"And everyone else here is alright? I saw the explosion. No cuts or anything?" Superman asked, looking over everyone, eyes briefly flicking up to me floating over them but quickly dismissing me for the moment.
The other four quickly confirmed that the worst injury among them was a sprained wrist from when the old guy – who turned out to be Lois's boss – fell during the boom. Nothing that needed an immediate trip to the hospital or an ambulance.
Then it was my turn.
I tensed as Superman looked at me, because now that he and Clark Kent were a little apart I could tell they had the exact same Ki signature.
That wasn't normal.
"And lastly we have you." He said. "Though I don't think I know your name."
I stared blankly at him. That confirmed something weird was going on with this Superman. "Uh, it's me. Califa. You know, the Saiyan you fight with sometimes?"
Superman froze and looked like he was processing that statement.
"Right, right. Sorry about that, it's been a while and I didn't recognize you. You grew up a lot!" He said before I could call him out on the pause. "I saw you trying to help. That was very brave of you but you should probably leave dangerous things like that to the experts."
"...Riiiiiiight." I drawled.
Yeah this guy was a fake.
We literally saw each other a few days ago.
"Anyway, I've got to go. Stay safe and Lois! I'd be happy to see you sometime outside of a disaster. Maybe for dinner one night?"
"That so? Perhaps we should." Lois mused, still giving him and Clark some looks.
"Great! If you have time I'll pick you up on the roof of the Planet. Around eight sound good?"
"If I can make it."
I watched as the fake flew off towards the city. Nothing about the quick conversation was wrong compared to the other times. But this one definitely felt different. Like he had to stop and think about certain responses that most people would just do naturally.
The bit where he didn't recognise me? Even if he hadn't lied saying that we hadn't seen each other for a while, practically anyone else would have looked like they were trying to recall something or had their eyes light up when they remembered.
The fake had paused completely. Almost like a computer program stalling out while it waited for a response to load or maybe like a record needle jumping out of the groove.
There was really only one thing I could say about the whole thing.
"That was bizarre."
----------------------------------------------------------------------
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I slowly breathed in and focused on my Ki, trying to feel how it responded to various pokes and prods as I tried to get it to do what I wanted. I had been doing this kind of thing for a while, but I was still mostly making it up as I went. This was something very different from the techniques I normally used.
Instead of gathering it all to one point and letting it burst out, I focused on spreading it evenly throughout my body. Then once I felt that was good enough, I focused on raising my Ki as smoothly as I could.
In theory this should–
Almost instantly the Ki destabilized and erupted outward in every direction. I opened my eyes and frowned at the small crater I was sitting in.
Failed again.
"AAAAHHHH, I don't get it!" I complained, flopping on my back and rolling around while I pulled at my hair. Why were techniques that didn't involve blasting something so much harder?! And to make things worse I couldn't just go find someone and pester them into teaching me what I was doing wrong, no one I knew of used Ki!
Maybe I should just wander around China for a bit and see if I could stumble across a Cultivator sect or something? Were those even a thing here?
I stretched out on the ground and sighed, taking a moment to just watch the clouds go by.
China could be interesting, but they didn't advertise superhumans like America did. I would have to actually search the whole country for who I was looking for. And that was assuming they weren't hiding out in some pocket dimension or something that would make me walk right by them. My scouter couldn't find anything at least, which was really annoying because that was supposed to be the one thing it was good for and it was useless when I needed it.
Which meant I was probably just going to waste more time wandering around the Chinese mountains without anything to show for it. Not exactly my idea of fun. Though maybe if I brought Donna or some of the Sidekick Squad?
We could make a whole training journey of it! I could find someone to teach me how to do the weirder things with Ki. Donna and I could try out all the different types of food, Kid Flash would probably enjoy that too. Speedy and Birdbrain would probably like the chance to see magical bows and bo staves. And Aqualad…
Well, there would probably be something interesting to him somewhere. I didn't really know the guy yet.
No, Donna was still on Themyscira and it was the middle of the week so the Sidekicks were probably still in school…
And sitting in the woods trying to get this technique to work was pretty much a waste of time right now. So training was kind of a bust.
There were other things I could do, speed and strength training, Ki control, finishing up the Destructo Disk…but none of that really sounded like fun at the moment.
I needed something to do that would let me unwind and clear my head so I could get back to training later.
Welp, time to go bother Superman then.
-o-
The problem with reporters was that they tended to leave looking for things to report on. They didn't just conveniently wait in the Daily Planet building for me to swing by.
I spent the better part of the morning crisscrossing Metropolis looking for Superman which was a lot harder to do when he wasn't flying around and I wasn't even sure he was in the city. I did eventually find him driving in a car along the coast with Lois and some fat old guy.
Guess that meant more waiting. Couldn't exactly call out Superman now and blow his secret identity. He was a jerk and probably evil, but you had to respect the identity rules. Besides I liked Lois, I wouldn't want her mad at me because I blew her boyfriend's secret to some random old guy.
Actually, did Lois know Superman and Clark Kent were the same person yet? I don't think I ever asked…
A loud bang interrupted my thoughts and I looked down to see a truck careening towards the car. One of its tires had blown out and the driver lost control and I could only curse at the situation because I was too far away to actually help.
Lois was down there so Superman wouldn't let anything actually bad happen, but explaining things would be really awkward.
The truck driver fought to avoid hitting the much smaller car, and for the most part he did, but there was simply no room for even Superman's reflexes to make it so the two vehicles didn't collide. The front left bumper of the truck hit the back left of the car and sent it into a spin before it smashed into the guard rail and stopped. The car only went a little bit further before it also hit the rail, pinning the driver side and almost going off the side of the cliff.
But it didn't look like anyone was hurt, Lois and the old guy were getting out of the car and the truck driver seemed fine. So that was good. Now, how to show up and call out Superman without blowing his identity and–
*BOOM!*
"Oh come on!" I screamed as the truck suddenly exploded. The three people were fine, just pushed to the ground. But the explosion was enough to send the car over the edge of the cliff.
With Superman still inside.
That wasn't a big deal. A little drop wasn't going to hurt him, but it probably would a normal squishy human. And because I had stopped to think after the crash, I was still too far away to do anything! Maybe just get there as fast as possible and have us both pretend I caught him so we could avoid awkward questions and he could repay me with a more serious spar.
With how fast I was going now it wouldn't be too obvious that I didn't catch–
A red and blue blur whizzed past me and my brain stalled out as I saw Superman come up over the cliff with a slightly disheveled Clark Kent.
…What?
I wasn't the only one confused. Lois was looking between the two and Clark obviously looked a bit shaken up.
"There you go, maybe next time just watch your step. Right Mr. Kent?" Superman said with a smile as he set the other man down on solid ground.
"Uh, yeah. I'll do my best." The reporter chuckled awkwardly.
…What?
"And everyone else here is alright? I saw the explosion. No cuts or anything?" Superman asked, looking over everyone, eyes briefly flicking up to me floating over them but quickly dismissing me for the moment.
The other four quickly confirmed that the worst injury among them was a sprained wrist from when the old guy – who turned out to be Lois's boss – fell during the boom. Nothing that needed an immediate trip to the hospital or an ambulance.
Then it was my turn.
I tensed as Superman looked at me, because now that he and Clark Kent were a little apart I could tell they had the exact same Ki signature.
That wasn't normal.
"And lastly we have you." He said. "Though I don't think I know your name."
I stared blankly at him. That confirmed something weird was going on with this Superman. "Uh, it's me. Califa. You know, the Saiyan you fight with sometimes?"
Superman froze and looked like he was processing that statement.
"Right, right. Sorry about that, it's been a while and I didn't recognize you. You grew up a lot!" He said before I could call him out on the pause. "I saw you trying to help. That was very brave of you but you should probably leave dangerous things like that to the experts."
"...Riiiiiiight." I drawled.
Yeah this guy was a fake.
We literally saw each other a few days ago.
"Anyway, I've got to go. Stay safe and Lois! I'd be happy to see you sometime outside of a disaster. Maybe for dinner one night?"
"That so? Perhaps we should." Lois mused, still giving him and Clark some looks.
"Great! If you have time I'll pick you up on the roof of the Planet. Around eight sound good?"
"If I can make it."
I watched as the fake flew off towards the city. Nothing about the quick conversation was wrong compared to the other times. But this one definitely felt different. Like he had to stop and think about certain responses that most people would just do naturally.
The bit where he didn't recognise me? Even if he hadn't lied saying that we hadn't seen each other for a while, practically anyone else would have looked like they were trying to recall something or had their eyes light up when they remembered.
The fake had paused completely. Almost like a computer program stalling out while it waited for a response to load or maybe like a record needle jumping out of the groove.
There was really only one thing I could say about the whole thing.
"That was bizarre."
----------------------------------------------------------------------
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Growing Pains - Chapter 42
- Location
- USA
Growing Pains - Chapter 42
"You guys sure you don't want a lift or something?" I asked for the third time. "I mean, it's like twenty miles back to the city and I'm not sure your car is going to make it." I'd dragged the fallen car back up the cliff since the fake Superman didn't bother, but it had still gone off a cliff into the ocean.
It didn't look great at the moment.
Lois didn't seem thrilled to get back into it either. "I'm not normally a stickler for these kinds of things but this outfit is over four hundred dollars, I'm not ruining it with car fish smell. No offense, Smallville. I'll wait for the taxi we called."
Clark Kent chuckled and rubbed at the back of his head. "None taken. I'm probably just going to walk back myself. Still a little shaken from the fall."
"And I'm responsible for these two. Can't just leave them in the lurch." Perry – Lois's boss – said. "But you sure Kent? I wouldn't blame you if you wanted to go ahead. Maybe sit down and get an interview with our friend here? Like the girl said, we're miles from anything."
"You know us country boys, Mr. White. Ten miles to school and all that…" Clark said as he started walking. "I'll be fine once I walk it off."
I sighed and looked at the truck driver. "Don't suppose you want a lift?"
"Nah, 'preciate the offer but I gotta stick around to give my take to da cops. Wheel shouldn'ta blown like dat, which means somebody screwed up at the depot." The driver said. "I take off now I could lose my job."
Oh well, I tried.
Besides, me asking was mostly an excuse to corner the real Superman for questions. And since he had left I didn't have a reason to stay either.
I waved goodbye and took off after the two Supermans – Supermen? – towards Metropolis.
It didn't take me too long to find them. It was hard to track a specific Ki signature in a city even if the two I were looking for were identical, but following them from the cliff let me know generally where they would be.
From there it was simple to just fly around until I spotted them. Though they didn't exactly look like they were getting along.
As I got closer one of them pointed at the other's hands which made that Superman look down and flinch at whatever it was before he started getting angry. He yelled something I couldn't make out and then punched the real Superman in the face.
Which…fair, I was here to do the same thing.
Maybe I could fight him first? I could at least ask.
"Hey you! If you're looking for a fight why don't – whoa, what happened to your face?" I started to challenge the fake but was shocked when he turned to face me.
Fake Superman had started off looking exactly like the real one, but now I could literally see parts of his face shifting as bones and muscles rearranged themselves for some reason. It ended up giving his eyes a sunken look and his jaw was starting to look weird too. And it looked like it wasn't stopping. The fact his skin was turning chalk white all over didn't help either.
"Uh…"
"Get…away, from me!"
A punch caught me by surprise and sent me halfway through a building. Whatever was going on with the fake, it didn't mess with his strength much. Ow.
I pushed some of the rubble off of me and looked around. I had crashed into the middle of some kind of office space and now had a handful of people peeking over cubicle walls at me. I gave them a wave and flew back out the hole I made. They lived in Metropolis, they were probably used to people getting knocked through walls now and then.
I quickly made my way back to where I saw the two Supermen, but I could only find one Ki signature. Turns out it was the real one, who was also looking around for the fake. "Hey, where did the other guy go?"
Huh, it was odd to see Superman scowl. "He got away."
Really now? Already? That was fast. "So any idea who that guy was? Or where he was going? Cause I need to pay him back for the cheapshot he took."
Superman crossed his arms. "I've got no idea, on any of it. Took off in a hurry though."
"Some kind of shapeshifter?" I guessed, it would possibly explain the Ki thing. Though I felt like I was forgetting something. "Cause he wasn't looking much like you by the end of it. Anyway, you want to help me track him down and see what his deal is?"
The sound of sirens started up in the distance, cutting off Superman before he could say anything. He looked towards the source and then back to me. "Looks like I'm going to be busy for a bit. Don't go looking on your own. I don't know what his deal was, but he wasn't some pushover. I don't want you getting hurt."
"I'll be careful." I shrugged, trying to seem uninterested in looking for his lookalike.
Superman didn't buy it.
"I'm serious, Califa. Stay away from him until we know more. In fact, if you don't go looking I'll promise you a full day of sparing on a deserted island."
I perked up. A full day fighting against someone I could go all out against, just for not looking for one guy? I could do that.
Then a thought connected and I had to hold back an evil smile.
"You promise?! Then it's a deal!" I shouted and forced him into a handshake. "So, while you're busy I'm gonna go hang out with Lois. Later!"
"Wait, wh–"
I didn't hear the rest, I was too busy speeding back towards the edges of the city.
-o-
Lois was glaring at me from behind the top of her monitor.
I said nothing and gave her my best wide-eyed, innocent looking smile.
A pen clicked twice in the background.
Lois glared harder.
I kept smiling and raised my hands up so she could see. Neither one had a pen in them.
Two more clicks.
Lois started looking like she was trying to suddenly develop heat vision. I wished her luck. I could kinda mimic heat vision by focusing Ki out of my eyes if I wanted to, but it wasn't really worth it considering the other techniques I could do.
For a normal human, especially one that got in trouble as much as Lois, it would be a lot more useful.
Two more clicks.
She did her best to ignore me, but I could see the vein twitching on her forehead. It was only a matter of time before –
Two more clicks.
"Will you stop that!?" Lois roared, slamming her hands on her desk and standing up to glare at me straight on.
My smile widened by a few teeth. "I don't know what you're talking about–" Two more clicks "–I don't even have a pen!"
"I can see your tail moving monkey girl. You aren't fooling anyone!"
Crap, she was good. I quickly tossed the pen across the room with a flick of my tail.
"Nope, no pen here! Definitely wasn't just pressing it into my back to annoy you!"
Lois raised her hands up and looked like she was doing her best to hold herself back from strangling me. At least she did before she took a deep breath to calm down and leaned forward on her desk. "Okay, fine, I'll pretend I buy that. Why are you here bothering me? Shouldn't you be off giving the Justice League a collective headache instead of hanging around an empty office building?"
I didn't want to tell her I was totally using her as bait for the fake Superman, because that would definitely get her to call the real Superman and he would probably decide that going where the fake was most likely to show up and just waiting was the same as going looking for him.
He was evil like that.
So instead I just said, "Superman blew me off earlier, so I'm following you around so he can't run away pretending to be busy and will have to fight me."
Lois raised an eyebrow. "So you're just going to follow me around for god knows how long?"
"Nah, you'll probably end up getting kidnapped again soon enough. Or he'll drop by tonight for your date."
"I do not get in trouble that often!"
I snorted. "Didn't you almost get knocked off a cliff today?"
"...That!...You! Ugh, nevermind." Lois sputtered and shoved away from her desk. "But you're right, he was supposed to stop by the roof around eight. I'm going to give him an earful if he thinks he can just dump you on me because he's busy!"
Huh, so she didn't know Clark Kent was Superman's disguise yet? I guess she only suspected and the fake showing up made her doubt it.
Of course I wasn't going to tell her, just hold it over her head later when she definitely knew. "Yeah, you tell him!"
My outburst just got me another dirty look that I decided to ignore as I followed Lois on her way towards the roof.
It wasn't a long walk, but it did give me some time to think about what scenarios meeting the fake Superman could end up as.
Problem was, he had so many clones and copycats it was kinda hard to guess right away. I mean there was the cyborg guy, the animated toy guy, the like thirty different 'evil' versions from alternate dimensions, and I think there was a power stealer that could shapeshift at one point? Hmm, I felt like I was missing an obvious one…
Metallo? No, that was the robot with the blonde skinsuit.
Well whatever. The point is there were a lot of different ways for someone to fake being Superman and they had a lot of different reasons to do so. That kinda made planning for a specific guy hard. The only guaranteed thing to do was to go find a chunk of kryptonite somewhere but that was both cheating and not something I could really do in five minutes.
So I was just going to go with the flow and figure out a plan later.
Lois made it to the top of the roof access stairs and I followed her out, but there honestly wasn't much up here, literally.
Besides the column that held up the Daily Planet orb, there was nothing on the sloped roof. Not even a rail to stop people from just slipping off the edge.
That wouldn't be a big deal if you could fly or were tough enough to survive the fall like a Saiyan could. But most humans couldn't do either of those, so how the heck did the builders get approval for that?
The sound of people talking broke me out of my thoughts as I heard Lois call out to the fake that just arrived and…was looking a lot worse than earlier today.
Ignoring the now completely white skin and messed up hair, most of his face now looked jagged and misshapen. That extended to the rest of his body too as he stood hunched over with his legs at odd angles. For some reason even his outfit looked different, the blue fading to a kind of purple and the shield emblem looking deformed and bizarre…oh.
I was an idiot.
"Right, Bizzaro. Forgot about him." I muttered under my breath. A mistake because even if Lois missed it, the degenerating clone of Superman didn't.
"Me not Bizzaro!...Am Superman! Me…hero." Bizzaro growled. "Me need Lois help."
----------------------------------------------------------------------
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"You guys sure you don't want a lift or something?" I asked for the third time. "I mean, it's like twenty miles back to the city and I'm not sure your car is going to make it." I'd dragged the fallen car back up the cliff since the fake Superman didn't bother, but it had still gone off a cliff into the ocean.
It didn't look great at the moment.
Lois didn't seem thrilled to get back into it either. "I'm not normally a stickler for these kinds of things but this outfit is over four hundred dollars, I'm not ruining it with car fish smell. No offense, Smallville. I'll wait for the taxi we called."
Clark Kent chuckled and rubbed at the back of his head. "None taken. I'm probably just going to walk back myself. Still a little shaken from the fall."
"And I'm responsible for these two. Can't just leave them in the lurch." Perry – Lois's boss – said. "But you sure Kent? I wouldn't blame you if you wanted to go ahead. Maybe sit down and get an interview with our friend here? Like the girl said, we're miles from anything."
"You know us country boys, Mr. White. Ten miles to school and all that…" Clark said as he started walking. "I'll be fine once I walk it off."
I sighed and looked at the truck driver. "Don't suppose you want a lift?"
"Nah, 'preciate the offer but I gotta stick around to give my take to da cops. Wheel shouldn'ta blown like dat, which means somebody screwed up at the depot." The driver said. "I take off now I could lose my job."
Oh well, I tried.
Besides, me asking was mostly an excuse to corner the real Superman for questions. And since he had left I didn't have a reason to stay either.
I waved goodbye and took off after the two Supermans – Supermen? – towards Metropolis.
It didn't take me too long to find them. It was hard to track a specific Ki signature in a city even if the two I were looking for were identical, but following them from the cliff let me know generally where they would be.
From there it was simple to just fly around until I spotted them. Though they didn't exactly look like they were getting along.
As I got closer one of them pointed at the other's hands which made that Superman look down and flinch at whatever it was before he started getting angry. He yelled something I couldn't make out and then punched the real Superman in the face.
Which…fair, I was here to do the same thing.
Maybe I could fight him first? I could at least ask.
"Hey you! If you're looking for a fight why don't – whoa, what happened to your face?" I started to challenge the fake but was shocked when he turned to face me.
Fake Superman had started off looking exactly like the real one, but now I could literally see parts of his face shifting as bones and muscles rearranged themselves for some reason. It ended up giving his eyes a sunken look and his jaw was starting to look weird too. And it looked like it wasn't stopping. The fact his skin was turning chalk white all over didn't help either.
"Uh…"
"Get…away, from me!"
A punch caught me by surprise and sent me halfway through a building. Whatever was going on with the fake, it didn't mess with his strength much. Ow.
I pushed some of the rubble off of me and looked around. I had crashed into the middle of some kind of office space and now had a handful of people peeking over cubicle walls at me. I gave them a wave and flew back out the hole I made. They lived in Metropolis, they were probably used to people getting knocked through walls now and then.
I quickly made my way back to where I saw the two Supermen, but I could only find one Ki signature. Turns out it was the real one, who was also looking around for the fake. "Hey, where did the other guy go?"
Huh, it was odd to see Superman scowl. "He got away."
Really now? Already? That was fast. "So any idea who that guy was? Or where he was going? Cause I need to pay him back for the cheapshot he took."
Superman crossed his arms. "I've got no idea, on any of it. Took off in a hurry though."
"Some kind of shapeshifter?" I guessed, it would possibly explain the Ki thing. Though I felt like I was forgetting something. "Cause he wasn't looking much like you by the end of it. Anyway, you want to help me track him down and see what his deal is?"
The sound of sirens started up in the distance, cutting off Superman before he could say anything. He looked towards the source and then back to me. "Looks like I'm going to be busy for a bit. Don't go looking on your own. I don't know what his deal was, but he wasn't some pushover. I don't want you getting hurt."
"I'll be careful." I shrugged, trying to seem uninterested in looking for his lookalike.
Superman didn't buy it.
"I'm serious, Califa. Stay away from him until we know more. In fact, if you don't go looking I'll promise you a full day of sparing on a deserted island."
I perked up. A full day fighting against someone I could go all out against, just for not looking for one guy? I could do that.
Then a thought connected and I had to hold back an evil smile.
"You promise?! Then it's a deal!" I shouted and forced him into a handshake. "So, while you're busy I'm gonna go hang out with Lois. Later!"
"Wait, wh–"
I didn't hear the rest, I was too busy speeding back towards the edges of the city.
-o-
Lois was glaring at me from behind the top of her monitor.
I said nothing and gave her my best wide-eyed, innocent looking smile.
A pen clicked twice in the background.
Lois glared harder.
I kept smiling and raised my hands up so she could see. Neither one had a pen in them.
Two more clicks.
Lois started looking like she was trying to suddenly develop heat vision. I wished her luck. I could kinda mimic heat vision by focusing Ki out of my eyes if I wanted to, but it wasn't really worth it considering the other techniques I could do.
For a normal human, especially one that got in trouble as much as Lois, it would be a lot more useful.
Two more clicks.
She did her best to ignore me, but I could see the vein twitching on her forehead. It was only a matter of time before –
Two more clicks.
"Will you stop that!?" Lois roared, slamming her hands on her desk and standing up to glare at me straight on.
My smile widened by a few teeth. "I don't know what you're talking about–" Two more clicks "–I don't even have a pen!"
"I can see your tail moving monkey girl. You aren't fooling anyone!"
Crap, she was good. I quickly tossed the pen across the room with a flick of my tail.
"Nope, no pen here! Definitely wasn't just pressing it into my back to annoy you!"
Lois raised her hands up and looked like she was doing her best to hold herself back from strangling me. At least she did before she took a deep breath to calm down and leaned forward on her desk. "Okay, fine, I'll pretend I buy that. Why are you here bothering me? Shouldn't you be off giving the Justice League a collective headache instead of hanging around an empty office building?"
I didn't want to tell her I was totally using her as bait for the fake Superman, because that would definitely get her to call the real Superman and he would probably decide that going where the fake was most likely to show up and just waiting was the same as going looking for him.
He was evil like that.
So instead I just said, "Superman blew me off earlier, so I'm following you around so he can't run away pretending to be busy and will have to fight me."
Lois raised an eyebrow. "So you're just going to follow me around for god knows how long?"
"Nah, you'll probably end up getting kidnapped again soon enough. Or he'll drop by tonight for your date."
"I do not get in trouble that often!"
I snorted. "Didn't you almost get knocked off a cliff today?"
"...That!...You! Ugh, nevermind." Lois sputtered and shoved away from her desk. "But you're right, he was supposed to stop by the roof around eight. I'm going to give him an earful if he thinks he can just dump you on me because he's busy!"
Huh, so she didn't know Clark Kent was Superman's disguise yet? I guess she only suspected and the fake showing up made her doubt it.
Of course I wasn't going to tell her, just hold it over her head later when she definitely knew. "Yeah, you tell him!"
My outburst just got me another dirty look that I decided to ignore as I followed Lois on her way towards the roof.
It wasn't a long walk, but it did give me some time to think about what scenarios meeting the fake Superman could end up as.
Problem was, he had so many clones and copycats it was kinda hard to guess right away. I mean there was the cyborg guy, the animated toy guy, the like thirty different 'evil' versions from alternate dimensions, and I think there was a power stealer that could shapeshift at one point? Hmm, I felt like I was missing an obvious one…
Metallo? No, that was the robot with the blonde skinsuit.
Well whatever. The point is there were a lot of different ways for someone to fake being Superman and they had a lot of different reasons to do so. That kinda made planning for a specific guy hard. The only guaranteed thing to do was to go find a chunk of kryptonite somewhere but that was both cheating and not something I could really do in five minutes.
So I was just going to go with the flow and figure out a plan later.
Lois made it to the top of the roof access stairs and I followed her out, but there honestly wasn't much up here, literally.
Besides the column that held up the Daily Planet orb, there was nothing on the sloped roof. Not even a rail to stop people from just slipping off the edge.
That wouldn't be a big deal if you could fly or were tough enough to survive the fall like a Saiyan could. But most humans couldn't do either of those, so how the heck did the builders get approval for that?
The sound of people talking broke me out of my thoughts as I heard Lois call out to the fake that just arrived and…was looking a lot worse than earlier today.
Ignoring the now completely white skin and messed up hair, most of his face now looked jagged and misshapen. That extended to the rest of his body too as he stood hunched over with his legs at odd angles. For some reason even his outfit looked different, the blue fading to a kind of purple and the shield emblem looking deformed and bizarre…oh.
I was an idiot.
"Right, Bizzaro. Forgot about him." I muttered under my breath. A mistake because even if Lois missed it, the degenerating clone of Superman didn't.
"Me not Bizzaro!...Am Superman! Me…hero." Bizzaro growled. "Me need Lois help."
----------------------------------------------------------------------
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Growing Pains - Chapter 43
- Location
- USA
Growing Pains - Chapter 43
What were you supposed to do when you found yourself on top of a building with a nosy reporter and a clone of her superpowered boyfriend?
My first instinct was to fight the clone, because that seemed to be how it always worked out.
Some scientist made a clone and it either turned out evil or was supposed to be evil in the first place, they got in a fight with either the original or their friends, and then they either stayed evil or joined the good guys depending on how things worked out.
Or they died.
I didn't really know what to do when the clone just asked for help without threatening anyone. I mean, I wanted to fight him. But doing that when he just asked for help sounded like a jerk move.
Maybe I could help him out and get a fight out of it as a reward for helping?
While I was distracted with my thoughts Lois took charge. "Who are you? What are you? And why do you think I could help?"
…probably not the best way to talk to someone obviously unstable without being tough enough for it not to matter, but I guess she hadn't gotten to where she had by being afraid to ask tough questions.
Though considering where she was, was on top of a skyscraper staring down a possibly evil clone of Superman with only an alien teenager as backup…maybe she should learn time and place better.
"Me AM Superman!" Bizzaro protested, angrily taking a few steps forward, incidentally making Lois tak a few back. Only a few inches from where the roof sloped down to a drop off the whole building. Crap, I should do something about that so the squishy human doesn't fall off.
Right, control the situation now, figure out how to get Bizzaro to fight me later.
"Hey, focus! What did you need help with?" I said, flying between the two.
The clone scowled at me…I think - it was kinda hard to tell with how messed up his face was. "Memory is…wrong. Me am wrong. Lois smart, Lois can help."
I nodded. "Right, not sure how much help she can really be, but she can probably call the–" I quickly stopped myself from saying real because that wouldn't help anyone, "–other Superman and we can all–"
"Me am Superman! Me no need help from imposter!" I realized I had still made a mistake when there was a flash of white and purple out of the corner of my eye and I was suddenly backhanded into the Daily Planet globe.
Note to self: Real Superman is a hot button for Bizzaro. Also he really doesn't hold back and hits really really hard, ow.
I wiggled a bit to free myself from the indent I had made in the giant stone ball and looked out only to see the real Superman had shown up and was now facing off against Bizzaro.
That could only end well.
I focused on wriggling some more, pausing when I felt the rock groan around me. Normally I would just break the whole thing and not care, but Lois was currently stuck on the edge of a roof with two Superpeople about to go at it and couldn't fly. Since I liked her for not making a huge deal out of my amateur kidnapping job in the interview she published, I would at least try not scaring her into accidentally walking off a building.
I had just freed myself when I heard a thunderclap followed by a scream.
I looked up just in time to see Superman flying backwards towards me before he collided with my nose and drove me back into the crater I just escaped from. That proved too much for the stand holding up the Daily Planet globe. I felt more than heard the base snap off followed by the eventual feeling of falling through the air.
Superman recovered first from our crash and quickly flew out to catch the giant falling rock while I took the opportunity to just get out of the way. I wasn't getting stuck in that stupid rock a third time!
While the actual hero was doing damage control, I was looking around for Lois and Bizzaro. Just like I expected, though, neither were anywhere to be seen.
I guess Lois got kidnapped again. The good news is that I was no longer going to be the worst kidnapper she dealt with.
"Alright, I think it's about time I got some answers." Superman said next to me, apparently having already fixed the globe. "Who was that and what did he want with Lois?"
"Botched clone of you." I said casually. "Said he was having memory problems and thought Lois could help."
"A clone?" I saw a bunch of emotions run over the Kryptonian's face, few of them remotely positive. But I could guess that someone trying to make another 'him' in a lab wasn't exactly something he was okay with. Before I could comment though, he refocused on Lois. "Help how?"
I shrugged. "I don't actually know. We didn't get that far before I got smacked into a building."
"Then we need to find them before she gets hurt. Can you sense either one?"
I had already been trying. The problem was, trying to find a normal human like Lois in a city full of other normal humans was like looking for a specific needle in a pile of needles. And Superman and Bizzaro had Ki signatures so identical I couldn't tell them apart, not helped by the fact Superman was right next to me making it hard to focus on the him that was not him somewhere else…
…Did that even make sense?
I shook my head to clear my thoughts. "Doesn't look like it. Unless you want to fly out of the city and let me look again? Wait, no, that won't work cause once you get close I won't be able to tell if he moved. And since he's probably as fast as you…"
"We'd just end up chasing our tails." Superman finished.
As the only one that actually had a tail I narrowed my eyes at him. Only to be ignored as he flew off into the city looking for his girlfriend.
Not to be left behind, I chased after him.
Afterall, Bizzaro hit me first. I had dibs on any fights!
-o-
As it turned out, it didn't take too long to pick up Bizzaro's trail.
And the moment we did my pride was getting a thorough pounding. Why? Because when I kidnapped Lois Lane, I took her to the cave I kept my stuff, gave her a few snacks I had lying around, and gave her an interview because she asked.
When Bizzaro kidnapped her? He took her to a fancy restaurant, gave her a quick interview, and then apparently took her home to some kind of hidden lab outside the city.
Literally the only thing I did better than a defective clone was making sure she didn't forget her notes. Bizzaro had apparently rushed them off before Lois could pick up her recording device where it was left on a table. Good for us figuring out where they went. Bad for my self esteem.
Superman helped the police for a bit and asked some questions while I mostly finished off a few of the abandoned plates of food left behind when the diners ran away from Bizzaro.
But eventually we got pointed in the right direction and flew off to look for them.
Thankfully that part didn't take long.
Once we left the city and the thousands of Ki signatures, it wasn't all that hard for me to pick out a few of them out in the wilderness. We had a few false starts - campers out in the hills and a few photographers doing nighttime photoshoots - but we didn't exactly need to get close to realize they weren't what we were looking for and move on to the next group.
It got really obvious when we found a random white building semi-hidden on a cliff that just screamed 'hidden lab'. We didn't even need to guess who was behind it either with the Lexcorp branded helicopter parked right outside.
"Luthor. Of course he is behind this." Superman said with an edge to his voice.
"I mean, he is kinda obsessed with you." I pointed out. "At least you get to put him in jail for a bit for illegal cloning or something, right?" I had absolutely zero faith that any rich person with as many political connections as Lex Luthor would face real consequences, but having to deal with the law would at least annoy him for a while, right?
"I don't know about that." Superman said bitterly. "I'd have to check but I don't think there are any laws against cloning anything not human."
"Oh."
I guess that was another reason he was pissed about the Bizzaro situation. Not only had someone tried making another him for probably not good reasons, it was also a metaphorical yank of the tail that he wasn't considered part of the world he protected so often to get the same protections others got just by being human.
And I guess that meant I should expect to run into a clone of myself at some point too. The people that had the tech and knowledge to work with alien DNA were probably tied up with trying to crack Kryptonian DNA, but I was pretty sure Saiyan DNA was a lot simpler to work with.
If they ever switched tracks I could soon find myself fighting my…sister? I wasn't sure how to think about that.
Before this, the thought of fighting another Saiyan would have just excited me. But thinking about what it would be like to fight a clone of me being used as a disposable weapon for some scientist?
I still didn't know what to feel about a clone version of me - and I would do the mature thing and repress thinking about it until I couldn't do that anymore - but I did know that any scientist that cloned me would lose their 'working legs' privileges at least.
"Well, I guess we should go grab Lois then?" I said instead, just to move us past this conversation.
Superman sighed. "Yeah, we should go get her before she ends up blowing up the lab somehow."
The sound of an explosion drew our attention back to the lab just in time for me to see the windows light up from flames dancing inside the building and what looked like a computer terminal crashing through a skylight.
"Huh, I thought that was supposed to be a joke."
"It was." Superman deadpanned.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
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What were you supposed to do when you found yourself on top of a building with a nosy reporter and a clone of her superpowered boyfriend?
My first instinct was to fight the clone, because that seemed to be how it always worked out.
Some scientist made a clone and it either turned out evil or was supposed to be evil in the first place, they got in a fight with either the original or their friends, and then they either stayed evil or joined the good guys depending on how things worked out.
Or they died.
I didn't really know what to do when the clone just asked for help without threatening anyone. I mean, I wanted to fight him. But doing that when he just asked for help sounded like a jerk move.
Maybe I could help him out and get a fight out of it as a reward for helping?
While I was distracted with my thoughts Lois took charge. "Who are you? What are you? And why do you think I could help?"
…probably not the best way to talk to someone obviously unstable without being tough enough for it not to matter, but I guess she hadn't gotten to where she had by being afraid to ask tough questions.
Though considering where she was, was on top of a skyscraper staring down a possibly evil clone of Superman with only an alien teenager as backup…maybe she should learn time and place better.
"Me AM Superman!" Bizzaro protested, angrily taking a few steps forward, incidentally making Lois tak a few back. Only a few inches from where the roof sloped down to a drop off the whole building. Crap, I should do something about that so the squishy human doesn't fall off.
Right, control the situation now, figure out how to get Bizzaro to fight me later.
"Hey, focus! What did you need help with?" I said, flying between the two.
The clone scowled at me…I think - it was kinda hard to tell with how messed up his face was. "Memory is…wrong. Me am wrong. Lois smart, Lois can help."
I nodded. "Right, not sure how much help she can really be, but she can probably call the–" I quickly stopped myself from saying real because that wouldn't help anyone, "–other Superman and we can all–"
"Me am Superman! Me no need help from imposter!" I realized I had still made a mistake when there was a flash of white and purple out of the corner of my eye and I was suddenly backhanded into the Daily Planet globe.
Note to self: Real Superman is a hot button for Bizzaro. Also he really doesn't hold back and hits really really hard, ow.
I wiggled a bit to free myself from the indent I had made in the giant stone ball and looked out only to see the real Superman had shown up and was now facing off against Bizzaro.
That could only end well.
I focused on wriggling some more, pausing when I felt the rock groan around me. Normally I would just break the whole thing and not care, but Lois was currently stuck on the edge of a roof with two Superpeople about to go at it and couldn't fly. Since I liked her for not making a huge deal out of my amateur kidnapping job in the interview she published, I would at least try not scaring her into accidentally walking off a building.
I had just freed myself when I heard a thunderclap followed by a scream.
I looked up just in time to see Superman flying backwards towards me before he collided with my nose and drove me back into the crater I just escaped from. That proved too much for the stand holding up the Daily Planet globe. I felt more than heard the base snap off followed by the eventual feeling of falling through the air.
Superman recovered first from our crash and quickly flew out to catch the giant falling rock while I took the opportunity to just get out of the way. I wasn't getting stuck in that stupid rock a third time!
While the actual hero was doing damage control, I was looking around for Lois and Bizzaro. Just like I expected, though, neither were anywhere to be seen.
I guess Lois got kidnapped again. The good news is that I was no longer going to be the worst kidnapper she dealt with.
"Alright, I think it's about time I got some answers." Superman said next to me, apparently having already fixed the globe. "Who was that and what did he want with Lois?"
"Botched clone of you." I said casually. "Said he was having memory problems and thought Lois could help."
"A clone?" I saw a bunch of emotions run over the Kryptonian's face, few of them remotely positive. But I could guess that someone trying to make another 'him' in a lab wasn't exactly something he was okay with. Before I could comment though, he refocused on Lois. "Help how?"
I shrugged. "I don't actually know. We didn't get that far before I got smacked into a building."
"Then we need to find them before she gets hurt. Can you sense either one?"
I had already been trying. The problem was, trying to find a normal human like Lois in a city full of other normal humans was like looking for a specific needle in a pile of needles. And Superman and Bizzaro had Ki signatures so identical I couldn't tell them apart, not helped by the fact Superman was right next to me making it hard to focus on the him that was not him somewhere else…
…Did that even make sense?
I shook my head to clear my thoughts. "Doesn't look like it. Unless you want to fly out of the city and let me look again? Wait, no, that won't work cause once you get close I won't be able to tell if he moved. And since he's probably as fast as you…"
"We'd just end up chasing our tails." Superman finished.
As the only one that actually had a tail I narrowed my eyes at him. Only to be ignored as he flew off into the city looking for his girlfriend.
Not to be left behind, I chased after him.
Afterall, Bizzaro hit me first. I had dibs on any fights!
-o-
As it turned out, it didn't take too long to pick up Bizzaro's trail.
And the moment we did my pride was getting a thorough pounding. Why? Because when I kidnapped Lois Lane, I took her to the cave I kept my stuff, gave her a few snacks I had lying around, and gave her an interview because she asked.
When Bizzaro kidnapped her? He took her to a fancy restaurant, gave her a quick interview, and then apparently took her home to some kind of hidden lab outside the city.
Literally the only thing I did better than a defective clone was making sure she didn't forget her notes. Bizzaro had apparently rushed them off before Lois could pick up her recording device where it was left on a table. Good for us figuring out where they went. Bad for my self esteem.
Superman helped the police for a bit and asked some questions while I mostly finished off a few of the abandoned plates of food left behind when the diners ran away from Bizzaro.
But eventually we got pointed in the right direction and flew off to look for them.
Thankfully that part didn't take long.
Once we left the city and the thousands of Ki signatures, it wasn't all that hard for me to pick out a few of them out in the wilderness. We had a few false starts - campers out in the hills and a few photographers doing nighttime photoshoots - but we didn't exactly need to get close to realize they weren't what we were looking for and move on to the next group.
It got really obvious when we found a random white building semi-hidden on a cliff that just screamed 'hidden lab'. We didn't even need to guess who was behind it either with the Lexcorp branded helicopter parked right outside.
"Luthor. Of course he is behind this." Superman said with an edge to his voice.
"I mean, he is kinda obsessed with you." I pointed out. "At least you get to put him in jail for a bit for illegal cloning or something, right?" I had absolutely zero faith that any rich person with as many political connections as Lex Luthor would face real consequences, but having to deal with the law would at least annoy him for a while, right?
"I don't know about that." Superman said bitterly. "I'd have to check but I don't think there are any laws against cloning anything not human."
"Oh."
I guess that was another reason he was pissed about the Bizzaro situation. Not only had someone tried making another him for probably not good reasons, it was also a metaphorical yank of the tail that he wasn't considered part of the world he protected so often to get the same protections others got just by being human.
And I guess that meant I should expect to run into a clone of myself at some point too. The people that had the tech and knowledge to work with alien DNA were probably tied up with trying to crack Kryptonian DNA, but I was pretty sure Saiyan DNA was a lot simpler to work with.
If they ever switched tracks I could soon find myself fighting my…sister? I wasn't sure how to think about that.
Before this, the thought of fighting another Saiyan would have just excited me. But thinking about what it would be like to fight a clone of me being used as a disposable weapon for some scientist?
I still didn't know what to feel about a clone version of me - and I would do the mature thing and repress thinking about it until I couldn't do that anymore - but I did know that any scientist that cloned me would lose their 'working legs' privileges at least.
"Well, I guess we should go grab Lois then?" I said instead, just to move us past this conversation.
Superman sighed. "Yeah, we should go get her before she ends up blowing up the lab somehow."
The sound of an explosion drew our attention back to the lab just in time for me to see the windows light up from flames dancing inside the building and what looked like a computer terminal crashing through a skylight.
"Huh, I thought that was supposed to be a joke."
"It was." Superman deadpanned.
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Growing Pains - Chapter 44
New
- Location
- USA
Growing Pains - Chapter 44
I wasn't surprised when Superman left me in the dust on the way to the now burning lab. I still was a long way off from catching the Flash, not to mention the Kryptonian. Especially when his girlfriend was in danger. But I was happy to note that I wasn't that far behind.
I made it through the broken window just in time to see Superman catch a bit of the ceiling that was about to crush Lois while Bizzaro was busy breaking tubes filled with…were those yellow mannequins built to look like Superman? Why would anyone want fifty of tho– oh, those were more clones.
But why were they yellow?
"Superman! You have to help us get out!" I heard Lois shout and looked her way to see her standing next to Lex Luthor, who was here for some reason, and an old scientist dude. I was actually surprised Lex hadn't ducked out by now considering how everything was currently on fire, but a quick glance around showed he wasn't here by choice. At some point a giant machine had been wedged into the doorway, locking everyone who couldn't fly inside.
"You!"
And of course we still needed to deal with Bizzaro himself.
"Hey, I had dibs on a fight!" I shouted as the clone slammed into Superman.
"Me kill you!"
And I was totally ignored.
While I mentally debated whether I should break up the fight so I could have a go or let them continue, Lex stepped forward and shouted at me. "She meant now, girl! We're sitting on top of a half-kiloton of explosives." The businessman said briskly, "Enough, I presume, to destroy even Superman, let alone all of us!"
I almost laughed at him for that, because while I had no idea how big an explosion half a kiloton was, I was pretty sure Superman could handle it no problem. Unless it was laced with kryptonite or something.
And considering it was Luthor, he probably did have kryptonite laced explosives in a lab meant to clone Superman. Just in case one of them went nuts and started tearing up the place.
…kinda like what Bizzaro was doing now.
Well, crap. And even if Superman could survive, Lois certainly wouldn't.
"Why would you set off a bomb that big when you're still inside the building? What are you, stupid?!" I complained as I flew towards the blocked door.
Lex bristled at that but didn't say anything. Probably because he was waiting for me to actually open the way out first. He was at least that smart.
"Califa, look out!"
"No one leaves!"
I only had a heartbeat to react to a flash of white and purple in the corner of my vision before my arm snapped up in a reflexive block. I managed to stop Bizzaro's fist from hitting me in the face, but defective clone or not, he was still a Superman clone and I was sent crashing into a burning machine on the other side of the lab from the strength of the punch.
"Ow." I muttered as I shoved my way out of the jagged bits of metal and rolled my wrist.
Definitely gonna feel that bruise later. But more important thing first, dealing with Bizzaro.
"Alright, you asked for it!"
I flared my ki and shot towards Bizzaro, who was already turning to focus back on Superman. But I had already had my dibs call ignored and then been attacked, so I had no issues crashing into him and driving him through a row of cloning tubes. I heard Luthor shouting in the background, but he wasn't important right now.
Superman could deal with him.
Bizzaro burst out of the wreckage with a roar and took a swing at me. It was fast, but unlike the original, it was sloppy. So I was easily able to duck under it and give him a quick kick to the ribs.
He reflexively caught my leg before I could spin away and when I went to kick him with the other to free myself he caught that one too.
Bizzaro gave me a crooked grin and I gave him a sharp one in return. Next thing he knew my hands were cupped a few inches from his face as I blasted him with a Ki beam.
As expected, he let go of my legs to shield his face and I poured more energy into the attack hoping to do some actual damage. I wasn't sure if it worked, but it definitely sent the clone flying backwards.
I wasn't letting up though!
I surged forward only for part of a column to crumble right on top of me, it slowed me down a bit but a bit of rock wasn't enough to stop me from getting close to my opponent! But…why wasn't he looking at me?
"Superman…save, Lois?" he mumbled, more to himself than anything and I took the risk to check over my shoulder to see what he was looking at.
At some point Luthor and the scientist cleared out but it looked like Lois got caught under some of the rubble. I don't know what Superman had been doing before that, but right now he was carefully lifting a big chunk of the building off his girlfriend's leg.
Superman had it handled, there was no reason it should distract from our fight!
Even the sound of part of the roof collapsing wasn't going to distract me from this fight as I turned back to Bizzaro, but he obviously didn't feel the same. He was still looking behind me –
Whoosh!
– at least he was until he blitzed past me towards the others!
"Hey! You're fighting…me…" I trailed off as I saw that Bizzaro wasn't taking the opportunity to attack his original.
He was stopping the giant section of the ceiling I heard falling just a second ago from landing on both Superman and Lois.
"Me hold. You go!" The clone told the others, even as he struggled under the weight. To pretty much everyone's shock considering he said no one was leaving just a minute ago and said he was going to kill Superman. "Me no am Superman. YOU am Superman. Superman…save Lois."
Oh.
This wasn't a change of heart. Up until a moment ago Bizzaro had at least partly truly believed that he was the original Superman. I don't know what the last straw was, but that apparently wasn't the case anymore.
And I guess that meant our fight was over.
Superman gave his clone a nod and quickly scooped Lois up before getting her out of the lab. The lab I just remembered was sitting on a huge bomb because I got too wrapped up in trying to fight Bizzaro!
"Hey, you gotta leave too!" I shouted, blasting the ceiling slab to pieces and moving to shove Bizzaro towards the door but he wasn't budging for some reason!
"No leave, me no am Superman. Me belong here." He denied.
I was getting flashbacks to Donna, "That's stupid! So what if you aren't Superman!? That doesn't mean you should just throw your life away, you're still a person!"
"Bizzaro…am person?"
I pushed harder and this time got him to take a few stumbling steps. "Of course you're a person! And you still need to finish our fight so get, moving, already!" Another push got me a few more feet when Bizzaro suddenly shifted and made me stumble past him. Before I could do anything, he grabbed me by both arms so they were pinned to my sides and picked me up.
"Hey! What are you–?"
"Monkey girl good person." The clone stated as he shifted me to a side. "But no place for Bizzaro out there."
"Wha-?"
"But me am hero, so me save you!"
The last thing I saw before Bizzaro threw me up through a hole in the roof was his crooked smile, but this one was different, almost proud of what he had done, before the building blew up with him still inside.
…
…
I don't know how long I hovered there watching the remains of the burning lab, but I just couldn't bring myself to look away even when Superman flew over carrying Lois. No matter how hard I focused…there were just no Ki signatures down there.
"Califa? Are you okay?"
I didn't know how to answer that right now.
"Why didn't he escape? There was more than enough time!" I asked instead.
Something dripped down my cheek and I angrily brushed it away with the back of my hand.
Superman and Lois exchanged a look but I still couldn't look away from the lab.
"I don't know." Superman said eventually. "I can't say what he was thinking in the end. Maybe he thought there wasn't a place for him in the world. But what I do know is that in the end, he chose to be a hero and make sure that you got out."
"That's stupid." I growled as more liquid dripped down my face, I brushed that away too. "It doesn't matter where you come from, as long as you're alive there's a place for you somewhere."
"That's a good attitude to have." Lois said, "but you don't have to keep it in. You're allowed to feel sad."
What was she – ?
I felt something roll down my cheek and this time I caught it in my hand.
It was water.
…oh, I was crying…
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I wasn't surprised when Superman left me in the dust on the way to the now burning lab. I still was a long way off from catching the Flash, not to mention the Kryptonian. Especially when his girlfriend was in danger. But I was happy to note that I wasn't that far behind.
I made it through the broken window just in time to see Superman catch a bit of the ceiling that was about to crush Lois while Bizzaro was busy breaking tubes filled with…were those yellow mannequins built to look like Superman? Why would anyone want fifty of tho– oh, those were more clones.
But why were they yellow?
"Superman! You have to help us get out!" I heard Lois shout and looked her way to see her standing next to Lex Luthor, who was here for some reason, and an old scientist dude. I was actually surprised Lex hadn't ducked out by now considering how everything was currently on fire, but a quick glance around showed he wasn't here by choice. At some point a giant machine had been wedged into the doorway, locking everyone who couldn't fly inside.
"You!"
And of course we still needed to deal with Bizzaro himself.
"Hey, I had dibs on a fight!" I shouted as the clone slammed into Superman.
"Me kill you!"
And I was totally ignored.
While I mentally debated whether I should break up the fight so I could have a go or let them continue, Lex stepped forward and shouted at me. "She meant now, girl! We're sitting on top of a half-kiloton of explosives." The businessman said briskly, "Enough, I presume, to destroy even Superman, let alone all of us!"
I almost laughed at him for that, because while I had no idea how big an explosion half a kiloton was, I was pretty sure Superman could handle it no problem. Unless it was laced with kryptonite or something.
And considering it was Luthor, he probably did have kryptonite laced explosives in a lab meant to clone Superman. Just in case one of them went nuts and started tearing up the place.
…kinda like what Bizzaro was doing now.
Well, crap. And even if Superman could survive, Lois certainly wouldn't.
"Why would you set off a bomb that big when you're still inside the building? What are you, stupid?!" I complained as I flew towards the blocked door.
Lex bristled at that but didn't say anything. Probably because he was waiting for me to actually open the way out first. He was at least that smart.
"Califa, look out!"
"No one leaves!"
I only had a heartbeat to react to a flash of white and purple in the corner of my vision before my arm snapped up in a reflexive block. I managed to stop Bizzaro's fist from hitting me in the face, but defective clone or not, he was still a Superman clone and I was sent crashing into a burning machine on the other side of the lab from the strength of the punch.
"Ow." I muttered as I shoved my way out of the jagged bits of metal and rolled my wrist.
Definitely gonna feel that bruise later. But more important thing first, dealing with Bizzaro.
"Alright, you asked for it!"
I flared my ki and shot towards Bizzaro, who was already turning to focus back on Superman. But I had already had my dibs call ignored and then been attacked, so I had no issues crashing into him and driving him through a row of cloning tubes. I heard Luthor shouting in the background, but he wasn't important right now.
Superman could deal with him.
Bizzaro burst out of the wreckage with a roar and took a swing at me. It was fast, but unlike the original, it was sloppy. So I was easily able to duck under it and give him a quick kick to the ribs.
He reflexively caught my leg before I could spin away and when I went to kick him with the other to free myself he caught that one too.
Bizzaro gave me a crooked grin and I gave him a sharp one in return. Next thing he knew my hands were cupped a few inches from his face as I blasted him with a Ki beam.
As expected, he let go of my legs to shield his face and I poured more energy into the attack hoping to do some actual damage. I wasn't sure if it worked, but it definitely sent the clone flying backwards.
I wasn't letting up though!
I surged forward only for part of a column to crumble right on top of me, it slowed me down a bit but a bit of rock wasn't enough to stop me from getting close to my opponent! But…why wasn't he looking at me?
"Superman…save, Lois?" he mumbled, more to himself than anything and I took the risk to check over my shoulder to see what he was looking at.
At some point Luthor and the scientist cleared out but it looked like Lois got caught under some of the rubble. I don't know what Superman had been doing before that, but right now he was carefully lifting a big chunk of the building off his girlfriend's leg.
Superman had it handled, there was no reason it should distract from our fight!
Even the sound of part of the roof collapsing wasn't going to distract me from this fight as I turned back to Bizzaro, but he obviously didn't feel the same. He was still looking behind me –
Whoosh!
– at least he was until he blitzed past me towards the others!
"Hey! You're fighting…me…" I trailed off as I saw that Bizzaro wasn't taking the opportunity to attack his original.
He was stopping the giant section of the ceiling I heard falling just a second ago from landing on both Superman and Lois.
"Me hold. You go!" The clone told the others, even as he struggled under the weight. To pretty much everyone's shock considering he said no one was leaving just a minute ago and said he was going to kill Superman. "Me no am Superman. YOU am Superman. Superman…save Lois."
Oh.
This wasn't a change of heart. Up until a moment ago Bizzaro had at least partly truly believed that he was the original Superman. I don't know what the last straw was, but that apparently wasn't the case anymore.
And I guess that meant our fight was over.
Superman gave his clone a nod and quickly scooped Lois up before getting her out of the lab. The lab I just remembered was sitting on a huge bomb because I got too wrapped up in trying to fight Bizzaro!
"Hey, you gotta leave too!" I shouted, blasting the ceiling slab to pieces and moving to shove Bizzaro towards the door but he wasn't budging for some reason!
"No leave, me no am Superman. Me belong here." He denied.
I was getting flashbacks to Donna, "That's stupid! So what if you aren't Superman!? That doesn't mean you should just throw your life away, you're still a person!"
"Bizzaro…am person?"
I pushed harder and this time got him to take a few stumbling steps. "Of course you're a person! And you still need to finish our fight so get, moving, already!" Another push got me a few more feet when Bizzaro suddenly shifted and made me stumble past him. Before I could do anything, he grabbed me by both arms so they were pinned to my sides and picked me up.
"Hey! What are you–?"
"Monkey girl good person." The clone stated as he shifted me to a side. "But no place for Bizzaro out there."
"Wha-?"
"But me am hero, so me save you!"
The last thing I saw before Bizzaro threw me up through a hole in the roof was his crooked smile, but this one was different, almost proud of what he had done, before the building blew up with him still inside.
…
…
I don't know how long I hovered there watching the remains of the burning lab, but I just couldn't bring myself to look away even when Superman flew over carrying Lois. No matter how hard I focused…there were just no Ki signatures down there.
"Califa? Are you okay?"
I didn't know how to answer that right now.
"Why didn't he escape? There was more than enough time!" I asked instead.
Something dripped down my cheek and I angrily brushed it away with the back of my hand.
Superman and Lois exchanged a look but I still couldn't look away from the lab.
"I don't know." Superman said eventually. "I can't say what he was thinking in the end. Maybe he thought there wasn't a place for him in the world. But what I do know is that in the end, he chose to be a hero and make sure that you got out."
"That's stupid." I growled as more liquid dripped down my face, I brushed that away too. "It doesn't matter where you come from, as long as you're alive there's a place for you somewhere."
"That's a good attitude to have." Lois said, "but you don't have to keep it in. You're allowed to feel sad."
What was she – ?
I felt something roll down my cheek and this time I caught it in my hand.
It was water.
…oh, I was crying…
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